Hey, did you guys see
what Captain Man
did yesterday?
Can we focus on algebra?
There was a fire
at a pet store,
and Captain Man ran inside
right through the flames
and saved all the animals.
And he didn't even get hurt.
Captain Man
never gets hurt.
He's a beast.
You know, someday,
when you guys are cleaning
my swimming pool
'cause you failed
this algebra test,
then flunked out of school,
I hope you remember
this moment, 'cause I will.
Hey, here's a cool job
I could do,
foot model.
You guys,
could we go over the list
for my birthday party?
Sure.
No.
But I invited 52 people,
and nobody's
texted me back yet.
What does that mean?
That people have been
to your parties before?
Oh, come on,
my parties aren't that bad.
Christmas, three years ago,
15 kids ended up
in the hospital.
'Cause of your raw turkey.
It was turkey sushi.
A boy almost died.
Almost.
Okay.
First person who helps me
find an after school job
gets this bowl of pine cones.
(gasps)
Why do you even need
a job?
You know,
to learn responsibility,
challenge myself.
He wants money.
I want money.
Money's good.
Can we please talk
about my birthday?
(sighs)
Am I gonna have
to slap a boy?
Henry,
can you please tell me
how in the wor--
Oh, I didn't know Jasper
and Charlotte were here.
We're studying.
Are we?
Mom, we're right
in the middle
of something.
I'm not interrupting.
Okay, thanks.
I just have a question
about your underwear.
Mom!
I'd like to hear
the question.
What is the issue
with Henry's underwear?
Mom!
Mom, I'm not okay.
Piper, we're trying
to study here.
I'm talking to my mother.
What's wrong, baby?
Jessica unfollowed me.
No one cares.
Henry.
Why would Jessica
unfollow you?
'Cause she posted
a picture of her
with me and Allison,
so I posted a comment
that said,
"OMG, you look
so gorgeous."
Well, that's nice.
No.
'Cause Allison thought
it meant she looked gorgeous,
so she posted a comment
that said, "Thanks, ILY."
And so then
Jessica got jealous
and unfollowed me,
and now I hate myself
and I'm gonna die.
I'll call Jessica's mom
and talk to her.
No!
That's not okay!
Dang it.
All these jobs say
I've got to have skills.
So? You've got
tons of skills.
Name one.
You're a great dancer.
No, I'm not.
You could take lessons.
Oh, my gosh.
(Charlotte) What?
I'm--I'm not great
at anything.
This is tragic.
Here, let me see.
I'm just a big pile
of average.
Okay. Here's a job.
Where?
At a store called
Junk-N-Stuff.
It says,
"Needed, part-time helper
for various duties."
"Duties."
And see? It says,
"No special skills necessary."
That's me.
I've got to go get that job.
You get the pine cones.
Sweet.
Good luck, Hen.
Thanks.
If you give me a pine cone,
I'll lick my elbow.
♪♪
(growling)
What are you looking at?
Uh, nothing.
Just, uh, this turtle's butt.
Sorry.
(Henry clears throat)
Um, my name is Henry Hart.
I'm here about the job.
The job.
(burp)
Um, did that plant burp?
Go back.
Come back?
Go back.
Where?
To the back.
Oh, go to the back.
Take the elevator down.
What floor?
Down.
(plant squeals)
You too.
(cell phone rings)
Hey, what's up?
Does my basement smell
like chicken poop?
Yes.
What?
I'm down in my basement
with Charlotte,
and she said it smells
like poop from a chicken.
A sick chicken.
Uh, what are you
and Charlotte doing
in your basement?
He wants to have
his birthday party
down here
in this chicken toilet.
This is my home.
Guys,
I can't talk right now.
I'm at a job interview,
so I gotta go.
(screams)
Henry, you still there?
(screams)
(rock music blaring)
(Jasper) Henry?
Henry?
I'll call you back.
Hello?
Hey, how are you?
Cool. Thanks.
Great to meet you.
I'm doing good.
What's your name?
Um, I'm Henry Hart.
I'm here about the job.
Age?
13.
I'll be 14
on my next birthday.
Ah. So you're aging
sequentially.
I like that.
Thanks.
My name's Ray.
Hi, Ray.
You ask a lot of questions.
I don't think I've asked
any questions.
Chocolate or vanilla?
Vanilla.
Helicopters or kangaroos?
Helicopters.
Love it.
Scrambled eggs or dynamite?
Both.
Maybe.
Complete this sentence,
"I'm sorry, Mother,
I didn't mean
for my elephant to blank."
Uh, lick Dad.
(laughs)
(both laughing)
Well, that's not funny.
No.
Um, is this
the job interview?
Do you want it to be
the job interview?
Um, what is the job?
What do you think
the job is?
Uh, well, the ad said
part-time helper,
so I'm thinking
maybe you need someone
to help you, you know,
part time.
Do you ever dream
about sleeping?
No.
Good.
If you did, you'd be dead.
I am so confused.
David?
Henry.
Can I trust you?
Sure.
Can you keep a secret?
Totally.
So I can trust you
to keep a secret?
Yes, sir.
I'm going to blow a bubble.
You're going to blow
a bubble?
And I'm going
to blow your mind.
You're Captain Man!
That's right, Henry.
Hold on a second.
Stupid zipper
always sticks.
Come--
Ow, that's my skin!
Yeah, there we go.
(chuckles)
Whoo!
Always good to keep
the old zipper lubed.
I--I can't believe
I'm standing here
talking to Captain Man.
Why, are you a fan?
Do you like me?
Most people like me,
but not everyone.
Yeah, I'm a huge fan.
Oh, man,
I've got to tell Jasper
about this.
He's gonna freak
when I tell him I'm here
standing next to Captain--
(screams)
Sorry, but you can't tell
your friends about this.
Okay. But--
Did you have
to melt my phone?
I'll get you a new one.
Really?
No.
So, Henry, tell me
why you want a job.
Well, you know, to--
to learn responsibility
and challenge myself.
So you want money?
Lots of money.
(elevator bell chimes)
(in British accent) Oh,
is this the ladies' room?
No, ma'am.
You're not supposed to be
down here.
What an interesting place.
Thank you,
but I'm conducting
a job interview,
and you're very old,
so can you please just
get back in the elevator?
Oh, I'll just take me phone
out of me purse
and call me nephew.
(Captain Man) Great.
I'll just turn my back
and look at something.
What are you looking at?
Captain Man!
Oh!
(grunting)
(in normal voice)
Goodbye forever,
Captain Man.
No!
Get off of me.
(Henry) Quit talking
like a British lady.
(in British accent)
Stop pulling me wig
over me eyes.
I can't see.
(grunts)
Captain Man!
Captain Man, are you okay?
Captain Man is always okay.
Nice work, Boris.
The boy did good job.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
You know the--
That's Boris.
He works for me.
(Henry) What?
How'd you know he wasn't
really an old lady?
Uh, 'cause of the tattoo
on his neck.
I saw it on him
up in the store.
And his boobs are too wobbly.
True.
Go get those under control.
Henry, you have a sharp eye,
good instincts, a nice shirt,
and you're brave.
Thanks.
Do you know
how to make sandwiches?
I do.
Then you have
all the qualities
I'm looking for.
But I--I don't--
You're the one, Henry.
The one to make you
a sandwich?
(laughs) No.
Well, yes.
But everybody gets old
some day,
even Captain Man.
I can't do this forever.
Do what?
Protect our town, Swellview,
from bad guys,
bad things, bad smells.
Smells?
You want to be horrified?
No.
Watch this.
(grunting and laughing)
Who's the freak
in the diaper?
The Toddler,
and don't let the diaper
fool you, kid.
He's pure evil.
Wow.
I'll show you wow.
Watch this secret video
that was intercepted
by my people
who intercept secret videos.
You were supposed
to bring me my applesauce
two minutes ago.
I'm sorry, Toddler.
Sorry don't make baby happy.
(blowing raspberries)
(man)
Toddler, good news.
The radioactive zenite
is here.
(Toddler)
Really? Whoo-hoo!
That means we can begin
phase two of my plan.
(man)
Will someone wipe my face?
(Toddler)
No!
(blowing raspberries)
Dang.
That takes so much effort.
Have one of our scientists
build me a device to do that.
To do what, sir?
This.
(blowing raspberries)
(groans)
You see that?
He's a maniac.
And there's more maniacs
like him,
all dangerous
to the good citizens
of Swellview.
Well, yeah, but we've
got you to stop them.
True.
But I'm not as young
as I used to be.
(sighs) I'm almost 34.
I need help, and someday
someone's gonna have
to take over for me.
Like--
Like me?
What do you say, Henry?
Do you want to be
my sidekick?
How much does it pay?
$9 an hour.
Whoa!
I know, right?
(bell rings)
(Jasper) Whoa!
(Charlotte)
Check this place out.
Hey, look at this thing.
(Jasper)
Wow, a bucket of swords.
What are they doing here?
Friends of yours?
Uh-huh.
Jasper,
please don't embarrass me.
Excuse me, sir.
He's gonna do it.
Yes?
How much?
Each sword is $100.
No, no, no.
How much for the bucket?
The bucket?
That's not a bucket.
That's a barrel.
It's close enough to a bucket.
I collect buckets.
Don't say it.
I'm a bucketeer.
Well, they seem
like nice kids.
Yeah, their names are
Jasper and Charlotte.
I've known them ever since--
Get rid of 'em.
I'll get rid of them.
(Jasper)
Wow, what a bucket.
Kid sure loves that bucket.
Hey.
Henry!
Did you get the job?
(Henry) Yeah.
(Charlotte) Cool.
(Jasper)
Does that mean
I can get a discount
on this bucket?
Dude,
it's my first day here.
You--You guys gotta--
Excuse me,
mysterious foreign man,
do Henry's friends
get a discount here?
That plant
just shook its head.
Wow.
Would you get him
out of here?
How much for the plant?
(mutters)
The plant is not for sale.
Bye, guys.
Come on. I'll give you
seven bucks for it
and one Canadian loonie.
Ahhhhh!
It spit in my eye!
I told you Canadian money
upsets people.
You guys,
you've got to go now.
Wait, what about my bucket?
I want the pretty bucket!
I love that bucket!
(Charlotte)
Will you shut up
about that bucket?
Carry on.
I gotta wear this?
All good sidekicks
wear costumes.
Sorry, but this is bad.
I have more options.
Too sparkly.
Eh, it's a little Broadway.
Too tight.
Uh, way too tight.
Oh, man... (sighs)
I ate a lot of fruit.
Hey, I like it.
I like it,
but it takes a lot of time
to put on.
And that's why you'll need
this special bubble gum.
Special?
Read the instructions.
"Chew gum, blow bubble,
fight crime."
Now.
What's this for?
It means we're engaged.
What?
No, I'm just kidding.
That's how I'll contact you.
Well, why can't you just
call me?
I melted your phone.
Right.
Now, listen closely.
That wristband flashes.
It flashes.
A triple flashing light
means emergency like,
"major sitch going down,
so get here fast."
Right.
A double flashing light
means it's just important.
And what is a single
flashing light mean?
Just to, you know,
shoot me a text whenever.
Got it.
Now, raise your right hand.
Spread your fingers.
Turn your head and cough.
What?
(laughs) Joke.
Place your left hand
over your right lung
and repeat after me.
I, Henry Hart--
pledge to be
an awesome sidekick
to Captain Man--
pledge to be
an awesome sidekick
to Captain Man--
and to never ever, ever,
tell anyone
that I am Captain Man's
secret sidekick.
And to never ever
tell anyone
that I am Captain Man's
secret sidekick.
You left out one "ever."
Ever.
It is done.
Feels good.
Yeah.
(alarm sounds)
Uh-oh.
What's up, Gooch?
Someone sabotaged the bridge
over the Jandy River.
The bridge is down?
Affirmative.
That means yes.
I got that.
Situation?
Cars in the water,
lives in danger.
Understood.
Phase two
of The Toddler's plan.
Let's ride.
Wha-- Ride where?
We've got people
in the Jandy River
that need saving.
Come on.
You mean we're going there
together, like, right now?
Yeah.
Get under your tube.
(beeping noises)
Ready?
For what?
Up the tube.
I don't know how to--
Whoosh!
(Captain Man)
Just tap your belt buckle.
Oh. Heh.
Up the tuuuuuuuube.
And we're going
to come back to that story
so we can take you live
to the Jandy Bridge,
which mysteriously collapsed
a little over an hour ago.
Jake, honey, come look.
The Jandy Bridge collapsed.
What?
Oh, no,
that was my favorite bridge.
(reporter) We understand
there are several people
in cars in the water.
People are injured.
(evil laughter)
What happened?
They're not sure.
They think--
Mom, Dad, I hate my life,
and I'm not okay.
Not now, honey.
Daddy's favorite bridge
collapsed.
Who cares?
Your daddy cares.
But every time I try
to watch a video on my phone
it keeps freezing,
because our stupid
Wi-Fi signal
only gives me one bar
in my room.
Then just wait
until the video loads
before you watch it.
Oh, so we're living
like animals now?
Later.
I'll run away.
I'll do it.
(reporter) Rescue workers were
unable to get their equipment
down the muddy embankment.
Luckily, Captain Man
arrived on the scene,
leapt into the water,
and saved the endangered
citizens from drowning.
(news anchor)
And Ron, is it true
that for the first time
Captain Man
wasn't working alone?
That's correct.
It appears Captain Man
has teamed up
with a new sidekick,
who apparently goes
by the name Kid Danger.
Huh.
Well, once again Swellview
owes a big thanks
to Captain Man
and, apparently, Kid Danger.
Hey, Henry,
did you get the job?
Yeah, just finished
my first day.
So how was work?
Uh, it was pretty...
interesting.
Next on Henry Danger...
Ray!
Ray, what's wrong?
We have a situation.
The Toddler?
Here comes the fun.
(growls) Kill everyone!
Monster babies?
That's right, Henry.
Unless we stop
The Toddler...
Tonight?
No, I can't do tonight.
What? What do you mean?
I got two responses.
To what?
My birthday party
invitation.
Two guys said
they might come.
Cool party.
Okay, you go
to Jasper's party,
I'll handle The Toddler
by myself.
We do have confirmation
that Captain Man
has been captured.
Captured? Dang it, Ray.
This is my playroom,
my toys, my rules.
You sick
underdeveloped maniac.
Ow!
Henry, you're late.
Well, sorry, but kinda
in the middle of something.
There's something
more important
than my birthday party?
Uh...
Forty-eight hours from now
every baby in Swellview
will be a hideous monster.
Yeah, this is
pretty important.
♪♪
(oven bell)
Mmm...