(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
NARRATOR: In the big city you can't believe everything you read.
Splashy newspaper headlines don't always tell the whole story.
Sometimes you gotta read between the lines.
What looks simple in black and white
can turn out to have a whole lot of gray area.
Some local nut had been making headlines
with claims he'd seen a flying saucer from Mars.
Oh, brother.
Where's the important stuff? Like the sports section.
Hare loses marathon race. To a tortoise?
Okay, ya two gumshoes.
Get your noses out of that rag and lend an ear to some real headlines.
NARRATOR: It was Hector Hare, the fastest dude in town.
Up till a few weeks ago, I never lost a foot race in my life.
I won 'em all! The 5K, the 10K, even the 401K.
And don't think this is all about my ego, by the way.
I got a family,
and that prize money goes to feed my wife and kids.
I mean, you tell me. Am I fast or am I fast?
Ta-da!
That's a genuine Miami tan.
-Even got a speeding ticket on the way back. -(SIREN BLARES)
I tell you, that tortoise cheats!
And half the prize money of tomorrow's race is yours,
if you can catch him in the act and get him disqualified, see.
NARRATOR: They had to admit, a tortoise outrunning a hare sounded shaky.
So, they made their way to the tortoise's apartment uptown.
Hey, you detectives, hold up. I got the goods on UFOs, see.
A whole mess of photomographical proof.
I mean, how much more do you need?
NARRATOR: Well, for starters,
how about something that doesn't look like
a paper plate caught in the wind?
They decided to give Red the brush-off and get back to the business at hand
of serious professional undercover work.
Foreign press, eh?
I hadn't expected you.
Of course, I don't mind an interview.
My life's an open book.
NARRATOR: From all appearances Treadwell Tortoise III
seemed to be as clean as they come.
Still, it was hard to believe that this was a guy
who could beat a rabbit in back-to-back marathons.
I'm sure you heard the hare defame me.
But the simple truth is, he's past his prime,
and causes no serious threat to a true athlete like myself.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have to do my cardio regimen.
One...
Two...
NARRATOR: So much for undercover.
So far, they had come up with nothing but goose eggs
and time was running out.
Lots of suspicious characters wanted Tom and Jerry to lay off this case.
Listen, youse two clowns better leave the turtle alone. Ya hear me?
Me and a lotta guys got a ton of money riding on him tomorrow.
If youse two knows what's good for ya
you'll keep your noses out of the tortoise's way, dig?
Beware the crystal omens.
Bad fortune will visit he who tampers
with the outcome of tomorrow's race.
No kidding, guys. I got a ton of dough at stake here.
I cannot tell a lie.
You're in big trouble if you meddle in the feud
between the tortoise and the hare.
Not persuaded?
How about an autographed picture of John Hancock?
You'll be sorry!
NARRATOR: It was starting to look like the boys
had finally gotten in way over their heads.
But nothing keeps a good PI down for long.
Hold up. You won't believe photographs?
Next time I'm taking movies. With this helmet cam even you'll believe.
Everyone will. I'll finally have proof that I'm not crazy.
(SCREAMS)
DOG CATCHER: There's that crazy dog. Get him!
NARRATOR: Oh, boy! Must be the full moon.
Except for the sunshine, race day was shaping up to be pretty shady.
ANNOUNCER: The race is on!
After you, good sir.
No, no, dear fellow. You first.
Oh, please, my distinguished pal. I insist.
(GROANING)
(PANTING)
(GRUNTS)
(SCREAMS)
NARRATOR: Our intrepid heroes were staked out in their most foolproof disguise.
Let's hope that disguise is also waterproof.
(DOG BARKING)
NARRATOR: Ah, the tortoise.
Now we'll see what nefarious shell game he's up to.
Okay, you know the drill.
You take my place until around Spring Street, while I zoom ahead
and drop back in a block from the finish line.
Yeah, I know.
Just rember, we split the dough same as always.
NARRATOR: So, that's it.
He's not just a phony,
he's a droney-phony-baloney.
And Butch is the decoy.
They'd have to split up to take this on.
NARRATOR: Jerry hailed a pigeon to take on the drone
while Tom would track the decoy.
Up, up and away, oh winged chariot.
(LOUD CRASH)
Let's try that again. Up, up and away, oh winged chariot.
I guess winged chariots ain't what they used to be.
I got you, pal. You've seen the UFO too now, huh?
Well, those Martian meatballs aren't gonna get away this time.
Hey, give back that fire extinguisher!
-FIREMAN: Hey, come back with that fire hydrant! -(DOG BARKING)
You getting this? An actual alien from Mars.
NARRATOR: Videological proof of a cheater.
What more could you ask for?
Let's get a closer look.
(BUTCH PANTING)
Leave that turtle alone.
(SHRIEKS)
I got a lotta money riding on this.
(BUTCH GASPING)
Whoa!
(DOG WHINING)
ANNOUNCER: And we have a winner!
NARRATOR: In the aftermath, it was determined that Muffin
was ineligible for first prize,
as she had not technically entered the race.
However, her owner rewarded her with a brand new squeaky toy.
Treadwell Tortoise and his accomplices were sent to prison
for fraud and first place was restored to Hector Hare.
And true to his word, he split the 14,000
with the cat and mouse detectives 50/50,
in fresh raw carrots.