(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
HILDIE: Exhausting, isn't it, Beatie?
BEATIE: Oh, there's no rest for the wicked.
HILDIE: A witch's work is never done.
(CHANTS A SPELL)
HILDIE: Oh, my.
(LAUGHING)
(SLAMS)
(COUGHING)
-(LAUGHING) -HILDIE: Thomas.
Witches Aid will be here for pick up any minute.
Gather our donations, please.
(BEATIE CHANTS A SPELL)
(CHATTERING)
HILDIE: Well, box is up, Thomas.
(THUD)
BEATIE: Stop lying around, cat.
Pack that junk, or we'll throw you out with it.
(CHATTERING)
BEATIE: Oh, don't be so dramatic, Thomas.
Zeke only bites when he's hungry.
(SCREAMING)
BEATIE: Oh, silly me. I forgot to feed him.
HILDIE: Oh, Thomas.
Don't forget to toss out that dirty old blanket, too.
BEATIE: (CHUCKLES) All right, you can keep it.
(FLIES BUZZING)
BEATIE: Thomas, stop staring at my bunions,
and get back to work.
HILDIE: Thomas?
-(SLAMS) -(CRASH)
-(SCREAMS) -(CHATTERING)
-(LAUGHING) -(DOOR SLAMS SHUT)
(YAWNS)
MAN: Witches Aid calling.
(SCREAMS)
(HEART BEATS)
HILDIE: Dear cat, it's time to say goodbye to that blanket.
BEATIE: Yes, Thomas.
You've had that ratty thing for ages.
Let it go.
(SOBBING)
(LAUGHING)
(FROGS CROAKING)
(WORMS SQUISHING)
(SCREAMS)
Hiya, pal. Welcome to Witches Aid.
Oh, boy, am I glad to see you guys.
It sure gets lonely in this ghost town.
You're gonna love it here, pal!
We got everything. Bad dreams? Aisle 17.
Faulty ones? Aisle 12.
And for the special lady in your life,
enchanted underwear.
(GROWLS SOFTLY)
Not bad. But that's nothing.
Who wants to settle for all this junk,
when you can have your very own certified, stupefied ghost!
(BELLS DINGING)
Excuse me. Sorry, maybe I wasn't clear.
I was talking about me. Ta-da!
Now, listen. I ain't just no ordinary ghost, you know?
I'm perfect for all occasions.
Parties, bar mitzvahs, weddings, funerals.
Or just a romantic candlelit dinner for two.
(VIOLIN THUDS)
GHOST: So you'll think about it?
(CRASH)
Looking for this?
GHOST: A customer who knows what he wants.
I respect that. So I'll make you a deal.
For a limited time only,
we are offering a special two-for-one sale.
For every blanket you buy, you get your very own ghost!
Me! Who could pass
on an amazing deal like that, right?
So what do you say, partner? Do we have a deal?
Hey, I think I'm getting mixed signals here.
GHOST: That does it.
(EXPLOSION)
You ungrateful cat!
If I can't have you, then no one will.
(CHATTERING)
(JAW CHUCKLING)
(CHATTERS)
(BROOM CREAKS)
Oh, boy.
Gee, wow.
Sorry about all that, guys. I just thought...
(BROOM CREAKS)
Yeah. Yeah, I deserve that.
But I'm not all bad, really.
I've just been so lonely, and I've always wanted my own home to haunt,
and you boys seem so nice, and...
Hey. Tell you what?
Maybe, if I fix the cat's blankie,
could you just do me one big favor?
I bet he'd really appreciate it.
How could you say no to a face like that?
So do we have a deal?
Oh, you won't regret this.
Hear that, champ? I got you covered!
(CHANTING A SPELL)
Not bad, huh?
Now, about your end of the deal.
GHOST: See, this ain't so bad.
-(SNORING) -Everybody wins!
The cat's got his blankie, I got a home,
and you got yourself a brand- spanking-new forever friend.