(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
(SCREAMS)
(TOM COUGHING)
(SCREAMS)
-(SHRIEKING) -(LAUGHING)
(HILDIE AND BEATIE SCREAMING)
HILDIE: My broom's been stolen.
It's not where I left it.
BEATIE: My wand is missing, too. I've looked everywhere.
HILDIE: When I catch the dirty robber,
-I'm turning him into the favorite stool of... -(SCREAMING)
A giant stinky ogre.
(GULPS)
BEATIE: When I catch the booger who snatched my wand,
I'm zipping his mouth shut
and stranding him on a tiny island
surrounded by his favorite food.
(GULPS)
(TUTTING)
This will not end well.
HILDIE: Thomas, Jerry, were other things stolen?
BEATIE: That's it, Hildie. We're using your wand to conjure up some protection.
A guard dog, maybe?
HILDIE: One fierce guard dog, coming up!
Oh, dear. He's far too cute to be fierce.
-How's this for a bloodthirsty guard dog? -(SCREAMING)
BEATIE: Better. But we need one that's not quite so dumb.
Huh?
See what I mean?
BEATIE: Oh, I know...
How about a cottage beast?
HILDIE: Yes, of course.
BEATIE: It's a start...
But he'll need the ears of a bat.
Oh, and the eyes of a hawk.
Of course, he'll need more girth.
-(GROWLS) -And a little cuter.
Like a teddy bear, for cuddling?
HILDIE: (SIGHS) Fine.
Perfect! Thomas, Jerry...
Stop lurking and meet your new cottage beast, Bog.
(BOTH GULP)
(SCREAMS)
(GROWLS)
(BOG GROWLING)
HILDIE: You shouldn't move, Thomas. You'll upset Bog.
Come sleep upstairs, Bog, so we feel safer.
(GROWLING)
You fools! You need to get the broom and wand back
so they realize they really don't need that foul beast.
Otherwise, he'll eat us all!
What can I say? I have a flair for the dramatic.
What are you waiting for?
Go now while you can.
HILDIE: Oh!
Bad Bog! That is not a chew toy.
Oh, now I have to conjure myself a new arm.
Go downstairs and guard the door.
No one gets in or out.
(SIGHS) Hurry!
(GROWLING)
Don't move.
(THOMAS SCREAMING)
This doesn't look good.
Fortunately, I have a plan.
You use magic to get around him.
Hildie still has a wand.
I'll distract the beast while you sneak upstairs and borrow it. Go!
-NEWT: Burgle, burgle. -(GROWLING)
-Burgle, burgle. -(CONTINUES GROWLING)
NEWT: Burgle, burgle.
Burgle, burgle.
(HILDIE SNORING)
Shh!
(CHUCKLING)
(CONTINUES SNORING)
NEWT: Burgle, burgle, burgle.
(LAUGHING) You can't catch me.
I'm the burglar.
-(VOCALIZING) -(GRUNTING)
(BOTH SCREAMING)
(GROWLING)
Do something!
Why?
-(GROWLING) -(SIGHS)
(ROARING)
(BOTH SCREAM)
This is helping.
(ROARS)
This is definitely not helping.
(GROWLING)
If anyone needs love... It's you.
(NEWT WHISTLES)
(KISSING)
(SIGHS) I guess that proves that love is the most powerful magic of all.
Well, return the broom and wand.
(HILDIE SNORING)
(KNOCKING)
HILDIE: Who's there? BEATIE: It's the burglar!
-HILDIE: Oh, look, it's my broom. -BEATIE: And my wand!
HILDIE: Good job, Bog!
(DOORBELL RINGS)
HILDIE: See who's at the door, Thomas?
(ALL GROWLING)
BEATIE: Bog is back, and he has a wife.
And many little boglings.
Oh, how cute!
(SHOOS)
(JERRY SCREAMS)
HILDIE: Beatie, have you seen my broom?
NEWT: Wait up!