1 00:00:03,604 --> 00:00:07,408 Who are you trying to get crazy with, ese? 2 00:00:07,441 --> 00:00:09,243 Don't you know I'm loco? 3 00:00:09,277 --> 00:00:10,578 [ Cypress Hill's "Insane in the Brain" plays ] 4 00:00:10,611 --> 00:00:12,846 * Insane in the membrane 5 00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:15,216 * Insane in the brain 6 00:00:15,249 --> 00:00:16,484 * Insane in -- 7 00:00:16,517 --> 00:00:17,718 Eddie: Ladies and gentlemen, 8 00:00:17,751 --> 00:00:20,654 guess whose insane brain is East Orlando High's 9 00:00:20,688 --> 00:00:23,991 newest inductee to the National Honor Society. 10 00:00:24,024 --> 00:00:25,393 Your ex-girlfriend, Alison. 11 00:00:25,426 --> 00:00:28,396 It's me. I made Honor Roll. 12 00:00:30,398 --> 00:00:32,200 I'm sorry. Am I sleeping? 13 00:00:32,233 --> 00:00:34,001 Did the beef stew put me to sleep? 14 00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:35,403 Am I at risk of drowning 15 00:00:35,436 --> 00:00:38,539 because I'm sleeping facedown in a bowl of beef stew? 16 00:00:38,572 --> 00:00:39,707 Not a dream, Ma. 17 00:00:39,740 --> 00:00:41,242 Y'all have been on me to get it together. 18 00:00:41,275 --> 00:00:43,411 Well, I've been here, waking up two minutes 19 00:00:43,444 --> 00:00:44,778 before I have to leave for school, 20 00:00:44,812 --> 00:00:47,548 crushing that A-minus/B-plus lifestyle. 21 00:00:47,581 --> 00:00:50,351 That's great, Eddie. I am so proud of you. 22 00:00:50,384 --> 00:00:51,885 Well done, Eddie. 23 00:00:55,723 --> 00:00:56,957 Whoa. 24 00:00:56,990 --> 00:00:59,593 It just goes to show how if you somewhat apply yourself 25 00:00:59,627 --> 00:01:01,562 at the last minute, anything is -- 26 00:01:01,595 --> 00:01:02,330 Raaaaugh! 27 00:01:04,232 --> 00:01:05,966 Excuse me. 28 00:01:09,770 --> 00:01:10,938 It's okay. 29 00:01:10,971 --> 00:01:13,107 Luckily, I have the number to Pizza Town memorized. 30 00:01:13,974 --> 00:01:15,109 Wait. No, I don't. 31 00:01:15,143 --> 00:01:16,644 I gotta go find that magnet. 32 00:01:19,913 --> 00:01:21,048 * Fresh off the boat 33 00:01:21,081 --> 00:01:22,650 * I'm gettin' mine everywhere I go * 34 00:01:22,683 --> 00:01:24,918 * If you don't know, homey, now you know * 35 00:01:24,952 --> 00:01:26,254 * Fresh off the boat 36 00:01:26,287 --> 00:01:28,422 * Homey, you don't know where I come from * 37 00:01:28,456 --> 00:01:29,957 * But I know where I'm goin' 38 00:01:29,990 --> 00:01:31,692 * I'm fresh off the boat 39 00:01:36,164 --> 00:01:37,598 Hey, kiddo. 40 00:01:37,631 --> 00:01:39,967 Got a sec for a big 41 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:41,969 Oh, God. Now you speak French? 42 00:01:42,002 --> 00:01:44,138 Listen, I know it must be hard for you. 43 00:01:44,172 --> 00:01:46,307 You're used to being the biggest brains in the family. 44 00:01:46,340 --> 00:01:47,441 You've got it all wrong. 45 00:01:47,475 --> 00:01:49,076 I'm happy for you. 46 00:01:49,109 --> 00:01:51,545 Buddy, I know anger-folding when I see it. 47 00:01:52,646 --> 00:01:54,948 Eddie, I am proud of you. 48 00:01:54,982 --> 00:01:57,017 But a thank-you would've been nice. 49 00:01:57,050 --> 00:01:58,319 For what? 50 00:01:58,352 --> 00:02:00,288 I'm the reason you're getting into Honor Society. 51 00:02:00,321 --> 00:02:01,689 I'm the reason you've been able 52 00:02:01,722 --> 00:02:04,458 to wake up two minutes before school every day! 53 00:02:04,492 --> 00:02:06,960 Every morning, I get up early 54 00:02:06,994 --> 00:02:10,631 to set your toothbrush and toilet seat. 55 00:02:10,664 --> 00:02:13,367 Then I sneak greens into your lunch 56 00:02:13,401 --> 00:02:14,635 for brain development. 57 00:02:14,668 --> 00:02:17,838 And I get your homework, the bus schedule, 58 00:02:17,871 --> 00:02:21,008 and exact change in quarters -- in case of emergency -- 59 00:02:21,041 --> 00:02:22,843 into your backpack. 60 00:02:22,876 --> 00:02:24,545 I dreamt I was a mer-man. 61 00:02:24,578 --> 00:02:26,214 * Yeah 62 00:02:26,247 --> 00:02:28,148 Huh. I've been using that change 63 00:02:28,182 --> 00:02:29,650 to buy sausage at 7-Eleven. 64 00:02:29,683 --> 00:02:31,785 And you never wondered how it got there? 65 00:02:31,819 --> 00:02:32,820 I thought Mom did it. 66 00:02:32,853 --> 00:02:34,121 Please. 67 00:02:34,154 --> 00:02:36,290 Mom's just trying to keep your head above water. 68 00:02:36,324 --> 00:02:38,859 I'm trying to get you to the other side of the pool. 69 00:02:38,892 --> 00:02:40,794 Since when do you care whether or not I do well? 70 00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:42,330 Since you started high school, 71 00:02:42,363 --> 00:02:44,298 which is the first year of precollege. 72 00:02:44,332 --> 00:02:46,800 I want to visit you at Stanford, not jail. 73 00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:49,036 Well, I didn't ask you to do any of this. 74 00:02:49,069 --> 00:02:50,238 I'm a grown human, 75 00:02:50,271 --> 00:02:52,640 taller than Mom and Dad. 76 00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:54,041 I can take care of myself. 77 00:02:54,074 --> 00:02:56,810 I would love to see you get by without all my help. 78 00:02:56,844 --> 00:02:58,579 Good, 'cause that's what I'll do. 79 00:02:58,612 --> 00:03:00,013 G'luck! 80 00:03:00,047 --> 00:03:01,382 Don't you mean bonne chance? 81 00:03:01,415 --> 00:03:02,750 Stop speaking French! 82 00:03:02,783 --> 00:03:05,052 ** 83 00:03:05,085 --> 00:03:06,520 Put your hands where I can see them. 84 00:03:06,554 --> 00:03:08,656 I'm taking you downtown. 85 00:03:08,689 --> 00:03:11,158 Ooh, are we doing this? 86 00:03:11,191 --> 00:03:14,194 Officer, I've been baaaaad. 87 00:03:14,228 --> 00:03:15,929 No. It's from my book. 88 00:03:15,963 --> 00:03:17,898 I just got another round of publisher notes, 89 00:03:17,931 --> 00:03:19,233 this time from Vera. 90 00:03:19,267 --> 00:03:22,169 She says my police sections lack authenticity. 91 00:03:22,202 --> 00:03:25,105 "Officer Moretti turns to Jennifer Hong. 92 00:03:25,138 --> 00:03:26,240 'Take a look, Hong. 93 00:03:26,274 --> 00:03:27,741 Those three gunshot holes 94 00:03:27,775 --> 00:03:30,077 make the head look like a bowling ball. 95 00:03:30,110 --> 00:03:33,681 But this poor son of a bitch wasn't spared.'" 96 00:03:33,714 --> 00:03:35,048 That's perfect, right? 97 00:03:35,082 --> 00:03:36,517 It's not great. 98 00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:38,085 I know. 99 00:03:38,118 --> 00:03:40,020 That Vera has a good eye. 100 00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:41,955 Luckily, Corporal Bryson has agreed 101 00:03:41,989 --> 00:03:43,791 to let me do a ride-along with him tomorrow 102 00:03:43,824 --> 00:03:47,060 so I can see what a real police officer does all day. 103 00:03:47,094 --> 00:03:48,462 Tomorrow is St. Patrick's Day. 104 00:03:48,496 --> 00:03:49,463 Perfect. 105 00:03:49,497 --> 00:03:50,731 The Irish love any excuse 106 00:03:50,764 --> 00:03:52,132 to break the rules. 107 00:03:52,165 --> 00:03:53,701 Look at the band U2. 108 00:03:53,734 --> 00:03:55,135 Not even spelling is safe. 109 00:03:55,168 --> 00:03:57,104 Tomorrow we're doing a special St. Patrick's Day menu 110 00:03:57,137 --> 00:03:58,205 at Cattleman's. 111 00:03:58,238 --> 00:04:00,140 Matthew Chestnut says it's a huge moneymaker. 112 00:04:00,173 --> 00:04:02,543 I love that guy. 113 00:04:02,576 --> 00:04:04,645 He's like whiskey -- burns your throat going down, 114 00:04:04,678 --> 00:04:05,946 but then it gives you some good ideas, 115 00:04:05,979 --> 00:04:07,581 and eventually you come to depend on it. 116 00:04:07,615 --> 00:04:09,116 Okay, tell me what you think. 117 00:04:09,149 --> 00:04:10,183 Okay. 118 00:04:11,985 --> 00:04:13,086 Too much? 119 00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:14,488 If I were a cop, 120 00:04:14,522 --> 00:04:17,591 I'd arrest you for aggravated assault of the eyes. 121 00:04:17,625 --> 00:04:19,993 Okaaaaay. 122 00:04:20,027 --> 00:04:24,264 ** 123 00:04:28,001 --> 00:04:31,672 Kenny O'Rogers' Michael O'Bolton's Cattleman's O'Ranch. 124 00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:33,173 It's perfect. 125 00:04:33,206 --> 00:04:34,408 Thanks for your help, Marvin. 126 00:04:34,442 --> 00:04:36,344 I love a drinkin' man's holiday. 127 00:04:36,377 --> 00:04:39,079 This, Father's Day, Saturday. 128 00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:41,248 Hey, hey, hey! 129 00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:42,916 Happy St. Pat's Day, friends. 130 00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:43,817 Whoa. 131 00:04:43,851 --> 00:04:45,919 I love a bold suit. 132 00:04:45,953 --> 00:04:47,588 The green kind of washes you out, 133 00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:48,856 but who cares, huh? 134 00:04:48,889 --> 00:04:51,592 St. Pat's is a day you can do whatever you want. 135 00:04:51,625 --> 00:04:52,793 I took a taxi here. 136 00:04:55,529 --> 00:04:57,365 Top o' the morning, all! 137 00:04:57,398 --> 00:04:59,467 Let's get this sham a-rocking, shall we? 138 00:04:59,500 --> 00:05:01,369 Cattleman's O'Ranch. 139 00:05:01,402 --> 00:05:03,203 Oh, Kenny Rogers. Hello, sir. 140 00:05:03,236 --> 00:05:06,474 Louis, I have some sad news. 141 00:05:06,507 --> 00:05:07,808 What happened? Is it Dolly? 142 00:05:07,841 --> 00:05:10,878 It's Roasters. We're filing for bankruptcy. 143 00:05:10,911 --> 00:05:13,213 You'll get a chance to buy back my half 144 00:05:13,246 --> 00:05:15,349 of your restaurant for pennies on the dollar. 145 00:05:15,383 --> 00:05:17,885 Yes! 146 00:05:17,918 --> 00:05:19,286 Oh, no. 147 00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:20,621 Koo Koo Roo got ya, huh? 148 00:05:20,654 --> 00:05:21,855 Afraid so. 149 00:05:21,889 --> 00:05:24,291 Tell Matthew Chestnut he's fired for me. 150 00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:26,460 Wait. Me? Why do I have to do it? 151 00:05:26,494 --> 00:05:28,496 Because I don't want to. 152 00:05:28,529 --> 00:05:30,063 Call me when it's done. 153 00:05:34,368 --> 00:05:39,373 ** 154 00:05:39,407 --> 00:05:41,308 Most cops wear standard-issue slacks, 155 00:05:41,341 --> 00:05:43,243 but I go with the tighter motorcycle pants 156 00:05:43,276 --> 00:05:44,745 'cause I like the range of motion. 157 00:05:44,778 --> 00:05:46,980 But in the summertime, I switch to shorts -- 158 00:05:47,014 --> 00:05:49,082 horse-cop shorts, not bike-cop shorts. 159 00:05:49,116 --> 00:05:51,151 Shouldn't you be writing this down? 160 00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:53,086 No. This is all unusable. 161 00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:55,656 I'm waiting for something exciting to happen. 162 00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:58,692 Dispatch: All units, we've got a J-2-9-9er in progress. 163 00:05:59,793 --> 00:06:02,362 Someone at the precinct offered to go on a coffee run. 164 00:06:02,396 --> 00:06:03,697 "J" is Java. 165 00:06:03,731 --> 00:06:05,232 299 is funny 'cause a cup usually costs -- 166 00:06:05,265 --> 00:06:06,266 Yes. 167 00:06:06,299 --> 00:06:08,335 ** 168 00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:09,369 Good morning. 169 00:06:09,403 --> 00:06:10,904 Emery, you look bored. 170 00:06:10,938 --> 00:06:12,740 I'm not bored. Yeah, you seem bored. 171 00:06:12,773 --> 00:06:14,041 Come have a seat. 172 00:06:14,074 --> 00:06:16,610 Eddie's gonna try and get himself out the door for school 173 00:06:16,644 --> 00:06:17,845 without my help. 174 00:06:17,878 --> 00:06:19,613 Look. His homework -- 175 00:06:19,647 --> 00:06:21,214 nowhere near his backpack. Hmm. 176 00:06:21,248 --> 00:06:23,617 The morning promises to be quite the poop show. 177 00:06:23,651 --> 00:06:25,953 ** 178 00:06:25,986 --> 00:06:28,622 He's brushing his teeth in the kitchen? 179 00:06:28,656 --> 00:06:31,859 ** 180 00:06:31,892 --> 00:06:33,060 Is he gonna spit it in the -- 181 00:06:34,261 --> 00:06:36,697 Oh, my God. He swallowed it! 182 00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:38,231 Guess that counts as breakfast. 183 00:06:38,265 --> 00:06:40,400 Look! Unmatched shoes! 184 00:06:40,434 --> 00:06:42,202 He's doing everything wrong. 185 00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:43,571 But he's getting it done. 186 00:06:43,604 --> 00:06:44,772 Surprised? 187 00:06:44,805 --> 00:06:47,107 I got up a whole five minutes earlier today. 188 00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:48,442 The sun looked different. 189 00:06:48,476 --> 00:06:50,077 There's my ride. 190 00:06:50,110 --> 00:06:51,745 What about your lunch? 191 00:06:51,779 --> 00:06:53,313 We're swinging by Jack in the Box. 192 00:06:53,346 --> 00:06:54,915 I'm treating Nicole to a Breakfast Jack 193 00:06:54,948 --> 00:06:57,150 for giving me a ride to the Honor Society pinning tonight. 194 00:06:57,184 --> 00:06:58,285 Later, nerds. 195 00:07:01,489 --> 00:07:02,823 Aha! I knew it. 196 00:07:02,856 --> 00:07:04,291 He left his homework. 197 00:07:04,324 --> 00:07:06,093 Later, 10-second-older nerds. 198 00:07:08,629 --> 00:07:10,464 He really doesn't need me. 199 00:07:10,498 --> 00:07:12,933 Hey, I still need you. 200 00:07:12,966 --> 00:07:14,768 Do you want to make me some pancakes or something? 201 00:07:14,802 --> 00:07:17,805 I've hit my limit with you early today. 202 00:07:21,942 --> 00:07:24,011 Okay, yeah, got it, Nicole. 203 00:07:24,044 --> 00:07:26,847 Y'know, I thought of you the other day -- 204 00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:28,516 Oh, no, no, no. 205 00:07:28,549 --> 00:07:29,783 It's okay. 206 00:07:29,817 --> 00:07:31,018 Next time, next time. 207 00:07:31,051 --> 00:07:32,720 We're all busy. 208 00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:54,107 Hi, Evan. 209 00:07:54,141 --> 00:07:56,476 Are you puttering around your yard? 210 00:07:56,510 --> 00:07:59,513 I'm just giving things a once-over, like you do. 211 00:08:01,849 --> 00:08:03,483 Sometimes she gets sticky. 212 00:08:03,517 --> 00:08:05,218 What's going on? 213 00:08:05,252 --> 00:08:07,120 I used to spend a lot of time helping Eddie, 214 00:08:07,154 --> 00:08:08,421 and now I'm not. 215 00:08:10,591 --> 00:08:13,060 Do you think our curb numbers need re 216 00:08:13,093 --> 00:08:15,395 Can you read those? 217 00:08:15,428 --> 00:08:17,330 I know how you feel. 218 00:08:17,364 --> 00:08:18,999 I used to do a lot for Marvin, 219 00:08:19,032 --> 00:08:21,969 and then I stopped so I could focus on my pregnancy. 220 00:08:22,002 --> 00:08:23,537 It was tough at first. 221 00:08:23,571 --> 00:08:25,806 Marvin rips open cereal bags like an animal. 222 00:08:25,839 --> 00:08:28,341 I mean literally from the side, with his teeth. 223 00:08:28,375 --> 00:08:30,711 Eddie does everything the wrong way, too. 224 00:08:30,744 --> 00:08:33,180 This morning, he left the house in unmatched shoes. 225 00:08:33,213 --> 00:08:36,249 Marvin drives 12 miles out of his way to go to a dry-cleaner 226 00:08:36,283 --> 00:08:39,386 because he likes to read the phrase of the day on their sign. 227 00:08:39,419 --> 00:08:40,754 Oh, I know that place. 228 00:08:40,788 --> 00:08:42,389 When the Monica Lewinsky news broke, 229 00:08:42,422 --> 00:08:43,456 they put up the word... 230 00:08:46,694 --> 00:08:48,028 Do you know what might help you? 231 00:08:48,061 --> 00:08:49,262 A hobby. 232 00:08:49,296 --> 00:08:51,865 It's a great distraction. 233 00:08:51,899 --> 00:08:53,433 It's calming to have something mindless 234 00:08:53,466 --> 00:08:54,868 to focus your energy on. 235 00:08:54,902 --> 00:08:56,069 That's what Eddie was. 236 00:08:56,103 --> 00:08:57,571 Hohh, up top! 237 00:09:01,441 --> 00:09:03,443 I have always liked yarn work. 238 00:09:03,476 --> 00:09:05,946 Oh, I got that on my trip to Chichen Itza. 239 00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:08,248 Más barato! 240 00:09:08,281 --> 00:09:10,751 Más barato! 241 00:09:10,784 --> 00:09:13,186 I bargained for it hard. 242 00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:14,622 Then, in chapter eight, 243 00:09:14,655 --> 00:09:16,857 Sergeant Moretti says to Corporal Turetti -- 244 00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:18,759 Why are all the cops Italian? 245 00:09:18,792 --> 00:09:20,227 Because they're cops. 246 00:09:20,260 --> 00:09:23,363 Cops have all different kinds of names and ethnicities. 247 00:09:23,396 --> 00:09:26,199 In my unit, we have an Officer Pemberton-Giles. 248 00:09:26,233 --> 00:09:28,068 That name is so long. 249 00:09:28,101 --> 00:09:30,070 It would add like nine pages to my book. 250 00:09:30,103 --> 00:09:31,471 Uh-oh. 251 00:09:31,504 --> 00:09:32,439 Oh, no. 252 00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:36,910 Hey! Real police action. 253 00:09:36,944 --> 00:09:37,945 Hey, you! 254 00:09:37,978 --> 00:09:39,647 You need to curb your dog. 255 00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:41,448 Did you not see the sign? 256 00:09:41,481 --> 00:09:43,316 No. Sorry. I didn't. 257 00:09:43,350 --> 00:09:44,484 Oh. 258 00:09:44,517 --> 00:09:46,086 All right, then. Need a bag? 259 00:09:46,119 --> 00:09:47,187 Thank you, Officer. 260 00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:54,427 I'll throw this away for you. 261 00:09:54,461 --> 00:09:55,395 Have a great day. 262 00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:56,630 Thanks. 263 00:09:58,298 --> 00:10:01,601 You took...the poop. 264 00:10:01,635 --> 00:10:03,503 Our job is to serve and protect. 265 00:10:03,536 --> 00:10:04,972 This is the serve part. 266 00:10:05,005 --> 00:10:07,407 There's a sealed receptacle in front of the Wells Fargo. 267 00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:11,011 I told you, I'm not sitting next to the poop. 268 00:10:11,044 --> 00:10:13,981 Either the poop is in the front and I am in the back 269 00:10:14,014 --> 00:10:16,884 or the poop is in the back and I am in the front. 270 00:10:18,451 --> 00:10:19,519 Look at him. 271 00:10:19,552 --> 00:10:20,988 So happy. 272 00:10:21,021 --> 00:10:22,956 The only thing he loves more than St. Patrick's Day 273 00:10:22,990 --> 00:10:24,424 is Kenny Rogers. 274 00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:26,593 How can I tell him he's been fired by the man he loves 275 00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:28,028 on the day he loves? 276 00:10:28,061 --> 00:10:30,130 Easy. Don't tell him. 277 00:10:30,163 --> 00:10:31,464 We had a saying in the Navy -- 278 00:10:31,498 --> 00:10:33,133 "Don't ruin shore leave." 279 00:10:33,166 --> 00:10:34,601 Save it for the sea. 280 00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:36,336 Right. Yeah. 281 00:10:36,369 --> 00:10:37,537 Why ruin his St. Pat's? 282 00:10:37,570 --> 00:10:38,839 I'll tell him tomorrow. All right. 283 00:10:38,872 --> 00:10:40,340 I mean, the man took a taxi here. 284 00:10:40,373 --> 00:10:43,510 [ Mid-tempo bagpipe music playing ] 285 00:10:45,045 --> 00:10:47,715 Oh, pretty. What is it? 286 00:10:47,748 --> 00:10:50,317 It's a Mayan hook rug depicting an ancient game, 287 00:10:50,350 --> 00:10:52,552 similar to soccer, but instead of balls, 288 00:10:52,585 --> 00:10:55,055 people kick around the heads of men. 289 00:10:55,088 --> 00:10:57,224 Oh. Is there a women's league? 290 00:10:57,257 --> 00:10:58,892 Eddie: Evan! 291 00:10:58,926 --> 00:11:01,461 I need that bus schedule and exact change you're always pushing. 292 00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:03,563 Nicole was supposed to drive me to the Honor Society ceremony 293 00:11:03,596 --> 00:11:04,732 and she never showed. 294 00:11:04,765 --> 00:11:06,333 Mom and Dad are off on their work things, 295 00:11:06,366 --> 00:11:08,235 and you know I'm not walking. 296 00:11:08,268 --> 00:11:10,003 Well, well, well. 297 00:11:10,037 --> 00:11:12,505 Look who needs his little brother aft-- Evan, there's no time. 298 00:11:12,539 --> 00:11:14,007 The schedules! 299 00:11:14,041 --> 00:11:15,675 ** 300 00:11:15,709 --> 00:11:16,877 Well, well, well. 301 00:11:16,910 --> 00:11:18,979 Look who needs his little brother after all. 302 00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:21,481 Really? You bought a bus ticket just to gloat? 303 00:11:21,514 --> 00:11:23,650 Of course not. I have a pass. 304 00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:25,753 You want me to say I needed your help? 305 00:11:25,786 --> 00:11:27,654 Fine. I needed your help. 306 00:11:27,687 --> 00:11:29,790 Thank you! Finally! 307 00:11:32,259 --> 00:11:34,561 Orlando Ear, Nose, and Throat Clinic. 308 00:11:34,594 --> 00:11:36,429 Oh, sorry. I'm not requesting a stop. 309 00:11:36,463 --> 00:11:37,664 I'm just celebrating. 310 00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:39,099 Well, me too, kid. 311 00:11:39,132 --> 00:11:42,102 Every day here is a celebration for me. 312 00:11:42,135 --> 00:11:44,237 I'm celebrating paying my rent. 313 00:11:44,271 --> 00:11:45,739 Whoo-hoo! 314 00:11:45,773 --> 00:11:47,574 It's a damn party in here. 315 00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:53,413 Dispatch: All units, we've got a signal 7 on Harbor Gate Circle. 316 00:11:53,446 --> 00:11:54,782 What's that? 317 00:11:54,815 --> 00:11:56,549 Someone buy a skirt at The Limited 318 00:11:56,583 --> 00:11:58,218 and accidentally walk out of the store 319 00:11:58,251 --> 00:12:00,120 with the security tag on? 320 00:12:00,153 --> 00:12:01,855 It's a dead body. 321 00:12:01,889 --> 00:12:03,423 Really? 322 00:12:03,456 --> 00:12:04,691 You can come along, 323 00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:07,027 but we have to follow procedure to the letter. 324 00:12:07,060 --> 00:12:08,061 Once we're on the scene, 325 00:12:08,095 --> 00:12:09,596 it is imperative that you hang back, 326 00:12:09,629 --> 00:12:11,631 observe, and do not touch anything. 327 00:12:11,664 --> 00:12:13,867 I am ready. 328 00:12:13,901 --> 00:12:15,635 It seems like a heart attack. 329 00:12:15,668 --> 00:12:17,805 I've been his caretaker for a few years now, 330 00:12:17,838 --> 00:12:19,873 and it's been a long time coming. 331 00:12:19,907 --> 00:12:21,274 He was watching "Suddenly Susan" 332 00:12:21,308 --> 00:12:24,111 and just clutched his arm and went down. 333 00:12:24,144 --> 00:12:26,947 Suddenly. Like Susan. 334 00:12:26,980 --> 00:12:28,982 Oh, his robe opened when he fell. 335 00:12:29,016 --> 00:12:30,150 Do you want me to close it? 336 00:12:30,183 --> 00:12:31,251 No, we should leave him as is 337 00:12:31,284 --> 00:12:33,320 until the coroner bags him. 338 00:12:33,353 --> 00:12:35,222 He was laughing at a Susan joke 339 00:12:35,255 --> 00:12:36,389 when he passed. 340 00:12:36,423 --> 00:12:39,426 See the frozen smile on his face? 341 00:12:39,459 --> 00:12:42,262 Oh the corpse is giving a thumbs-up. 342 00:12:42,295 --> 00:12:44,131 Looks like rigor mortis set in. 343 00:12:45,165 --> 00:12:46,233 Yep. 344 00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:48,468 Yep, the flesh is starting to purple. 345 00:12:52,840 --> 00:12:54,607 This our body? 346 00:12:54,641 --> 00:12:56,743 [ Mid-tempo bagpipe music playing ] 347 00:12:58,611 --> 00:13:01,148 Whiskeys for all, on the Chestnut! 348 00:13:02,215 --> 00:13:03,851 Whoo! 349 00:13:03,884 --> 00:13:05,585 Whoa, Matthew, is that a good idea? 350 00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:06,586 It's a great idea. 351 00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:07,921 I just got off the phone with my wife. 352 00:13:07,955 --> 00:13:09,656 We're putting a down payment on a house. 353 00:13:09,689 --> 00:13:10,657 What? 354 00:13:10,690 --> 00:13:12,425 It's time I grow roots in Orlando, 355 00:13:12,459 --> 00:13:15,262 and I have never made a bad decision on St. Pat's Day. 356 00:13:15,295 --> 00:13:17,097 Marvin, something's happening here. 357 00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:18,331 You want to weigh in? 358 00:13:18,365 --> 00:13:19,799 Shore leave? 359 00:13:19,833 --> 00:13:21,701 I can't! 360 00:13:23,871 --> 00:13:26,673 Um...Matthew, we need to talk. Uh-huh. 361 00:13:26,706 --> 00:13:28,041 Kenny Rogers called. 362 00:13:28,075 --> 00:13:29,709 Did he call to wish me St. Pat's? 363 00:13:29,742 --> 00:13:31,178 No. He did not. 364 00:13:31,211 --> 00:13:33,313 Roasters is filing for bankruptcy. 365 00:13:33,346 --> 00:13:35,182 Kenny has to let you go. 366 00:13:36,716 --> 00:13:38,151 I see. 367 00:13:41,021 --> 00:13:42,622 I need a moment. 368 00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:43,790 Yeah. 369 00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:51,498 ** 370 00:13:56,769 --> 00:14:02,209 * On a warm summer's evenin' on a train bound for nowhere * 371 00:14:02,242 --> 00:14:04,577 * I met up with a gambler 372 00:14:04,611 --> 00:14:07,080 * We were both too tired to sleep * 373 00:14:07,114 --> 00:14:09,816 * So we took turns a-starin' 374 00:14:09,849 --> 00:14:12,585 * Out the window at the darkness * 375 00:14:12,619 --> 00:14:14,387 * Till boredom overtook us You think he'll see that, 376 00:14:14,421 --> 00:14:15,688 or should I have tapped him on the shoulder? 377 00:14:15,722 --> 00:14:17,190 * And he began to speak 378 00:14:19,392 --> 00:14:20,894 Dude, what the hell? 379 00:14:20,928 --> 00:14:22,829 "What the hell," you! 380 00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:24,197 You were supposed to pick me up at my house. 381 00:14:24,231 --> 00:14:26,233 No, you were supposed to meet me at the mall. 382 00:14:26,266 --> 00:14:28,568 I-I called and told Evan to tell you. 383 00:14:29,536 --> 00:14:31,771 Nicole, what are you even doing here? 384 00:14:31,804 --> 00:14:33,573 I'm getting my Honor Society pin. 385 00:14:33,606 --> 00:14:35,875 You're in the Honor Society? 386 00:14:35,909 --> 00:14:37,277 I thought you were just his ride. 387 00:14:37,310 --> 00:14:39,446 My grades skyrocketed since I came out. 388 00:14:39,479 --> 00:14:41,881 Turns out I was hella distracted. 389 00:14:41,915 --> 00:14:43,450 You didn't tell me on purpose 390 00:14:43,483 --> 00:14:45,585 so I'd have to come crawling back to you 391 00:14:45,618 --> 00:14:46,686 for the bus schedule. 392 00:14:46,719 --> 00:14:47,854 In my defense, 393 00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:49,189 I thought she was just dropping you off 394 00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:51,058 and you would never find out. 395 00:14:51,091 --> 00:14:53,293 Jerk move, little bro. 396 00:14:59,933 --> 00:15:00,900 I can't believe Eddie wanted to walk home. 397 00:15:00,934 --> 00:15:01,935 He hates walking. 398 00:15:01,969 --> 00:15:03,036 I guess he hates you more right now. 399 00:15:03,070 --> 00:15:05,038 Clever. Somebody earned that pin. 400 00:15:05,072 --> 00:15:07,107 Thank you for the ride. 401 00:15:07,140 --> 00:15:09,809 It's very smooth for a car made of plastic. 402 00:15:09,842 --> 00:15:11,478 What's your car made out of? 403 00:15:11,511 --> 00:15:12,745 Mm-mnh. 404 00:15:12,779 --> 00:15:14,147 It's smooth because Eddie reminded me 405 00:15:14,181 --> 00:15:15,748 to get my oil changed. 406 00:15:15,782 --> 00:15:17,750 What? No way. 407 00:15:17,784 --> 00:15:20,087 The Saturn is where we talk when things get real, 408 00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:21,721 and he said he wanted to make sure 409 00:15:21,754 --> 00:15:23,991 our safe space stayed safe. 410 00:15:24,024 --> 00:15:25,892 I think you've been underestimating him. 411 00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:31,598 ** 412 00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:34,267 The carnation, 413 00:15:34,301 --> 00:15:36,636 known throughout history as the "I'm sorry" flower. 414 00:15:36,669 --> 00:15:38,638 Don't wanna hear it. 415 00:15:40,873 --> 00:15:42,842 Oh. "I'm sorry" flowers. 416 00:15:42,875 --> 00:15:45,345 What did you do? 417 00:15:45,378 --> 00:15:47,747 Jessica: I'm so embarrassed. 418 00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:50,583 I've seen bodies before, at funerals, 419 00:15:50,617 --> 00:15:53,853 but...never in the wild. 420 00:15:53,886 --> 00:15:55,188 There was no makeup. 421 00:15:55,222 --> 00:15:57,490 He wasn't in his best suit. 422 00:15:57,524 --> 00:16:01,161 He was just lying there in an open robe... 423 00:16:01,194 --> 00:16:03,663 lying where he fell. 424 00:16:03,696 --> 00:16:05,632 "Lying where he fell." 425 00:16:05,665 --> 00:16:08,168 That's good. I can use that. 426 00:16:08,201 --> 00:16:11,171 At least one good thing came out of today. 427 00:16:11,204 --> 00:16:12,839 Don't be so hard on yourself. 428 00:16:12,872 --> 00:16:14,541 Look, you wanted to learn about cops. 429 00:16:14,574 --> 00:16:15,942 This is it -- 430 00:16:15,975 --> 00:16:17,777 talking it out after a hard shift, 431 00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:20,980 being there for each other, being human. 432 00:16:21,014 --> 00:16:22,749 Authentic. Mm-hmm. 433 00:16:23,850 --> 00:16:25,252 You're all right, Moretti. 434 00:16:26,819 --> 00:16:29,656 You're not so bad yourself, Turetti. 435 00:16:29,689 --> 00:16:31,224 A call just came in for you two. 436 00:16:31,258 --> 00:16:32,659 Thanks, Pemberton-Giles. 437 00:16:32,692 --> 00:16:34,127 I call shotgun. 438 00:16:34,161 --> 00:16:36,463 Not the seat in the car -- the weapon. 439 00:16:36,496 --> 00:16:37,830 I want to be ready. 440 00:16:42,202 --> 00:16:43,870 How's that cabbage taste? 441 00:16:43,903 --> 00:16:46,539 "The Gambler" said it right -- 442 00:16:46,573 --> 00:16:48,975 "The best that you can hope for is to die in your sleep." 443 00:16:49,008 --> 00:16:51,878 I had no idea that song got so dark. 444 00:16:51,911 --> 00:16:53,813 I always thought it was a happy poker song. 445 00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:56,316 No happy songs take place on trains, Louis. 446 00:16:56,349 --> 00:16:58,418 What about "Chattanooga Choo Choo"? 447 00:16:58,451 --> 00:16:59,586 That's true. 448 00:16:59,619 --> 00:17:01,821 I can't even talk about trains right. 449 00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:04,191 Listen, you don't have to pray for death 450 00:17:04,224 --> 00:17:05,525 to find you in the night. 451 00:17:05,558 --> 00:17:07,094 You've turned out to be a loyal friend 452 00:17:07,127 --> 00:17:08,661 and a hell of a good guy. 453 00:17:08,695 --> 00:17:11,231 If you want it, there will always be a job for you 454 00:17:11,264 --> 00:17:13,133 here at Cattleman's Ranch. 455 00:17:15,135 --> 00:17:17,704 Buddy/new boss... 456 00:17:17,737 --> 00:17:19,106 thank you. 457 00:17:23,810 --> 00:17:26,413 Noise complaint came into the precinct, 458 00:17:26,446 --> 00:17:29,282 and it looks like this establishment is way over capacity. 459 00:17:30,483 --> 00:17:32,852 Officer, what's happening? 460 00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:34,387 Thanks for coming. 461 00:17:34,421 --> 00:17:36,189 Like I said on the phone, we're almost out of stout, 462 00:17:36,223 --> 00:17:37,690 and I'm afraid these people will riot. 463 00:17:37,724 --> 00:17:39,359 Everybody out, 464 00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:42,229 or I'll cite you all for drunk and disorderly. 465 00:17:42,262 --> 00:17:45,031 You first, Conan O'Brien. 466 00:17:45,064 --> 00:17:47,700 Well, you heard the man. Sorry, folks. 467 00:17:47,734 --> 00:17:49,102 Uh, take a shamrock and bring it back 468 00:17:49,136 --> 00:17:51,371 for 10% off ribs on your next visit. 469 00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:53,573 D-Don't listen to him. He's drunk. 470 00:17:53,606 --> 00:17:55,275 No discounts on the ribs. 471 00:17:57,410 --> 00:17:59,746 The fuzz. 472 00:17:59,779 --> 00:18:02,081 Hide, Louis! Hide! 473 00:18:02,115 --> 00:18:03,483 Ah! Ooh, ooh, ooh. 474 00:18:03,516 --> 00:18:04,851 Ah, ah! 475 00:18:06,419 --> 00:18:07,887 Okay, pass your homework forward, 476 00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:10,357 and then we'll dig in to Dickens. 477 00:18:14,261 --> 00:18:17,430 My homework. I -- I forgot it. 478 00:18:22,769 --> 00:18:24,171 I can't believe it. 479 00:18:24,204 --> 00:18:26,806 I've been so focused on Eddie, I forgot about myself. 480 00:18:28,675 --> 00:18:29,976 What up, Ms. D.? 481 00:18:30,009 --> 00:18:32,011 Huang in the house! 482 00:18:32,044 --> 00:18:33,580 Did you get your March Madness bracket 483 00:18:33,613 --> 00:18:35,148 turned in to Mr. Carlson yet? 484 00:18:35,182 --> 00:18:37,850 I saw you took UNLV to go all the way. 485 00:18:37,884 --> 00:18:39,586 Bold. 486 00:18:39,619 --> 00:18:41,588 Can I borrow my little bro for five? 487 00:18:41,621 --> 00:18:43,089 Five? No one talks for five. 488 00:18:43,122 --> 00:18:45,625 He's your blood. Take 10. 489 00:18:48,328 --> 00:18:50,197 You forgot something this morning. 490 00:18:50,230 --> 00:18:51,798 My essay! 491 00:18:51,831 --> 00:18:53,833 I had to go back home because I forgot my wallet. 492 00:18:53,866 --> 00:18:56,303 Actually, I forgot my whole book bag. 493 00:18:56,336 --> 00:18:57,704 Full disclosure -- I was wearing my swimsuit. 494 00:18:57,737 --> 00:18:59,206 I thought it was Saturday. 495 00:18:59,239 --> 00:19:00,707 And I saw it on the coffee table. 496 00:19:00,740 --> 00:19:02,175 You did this for me? 497 00:19:02,209 --> 00:19:03,710 But I've been such a jerk to you. 498 00:19:03,743 --> 00:19:05,044 I'm still mad, 499 00:19:05,077 --> 00:19:07,814 but I know how important homework is to you. 500 00:19:07,847 --> 00:19:10,650 I want to visit you at Stanford, not Georgia Tech. 501 00:19:10,683 --> 00:19:11,751 Whoa. 502 00:19:12,652 --> 00:19:14,221 But what about your school? 503 00:19:14,254 --> 00:19:17,123 Turns out Honor Society students can roll in late to homeroom 504 00:19:17,156 --> 00:19:18,691 because the monitor trusts them. 505 00:19:18,725 --> 00:19:19,959 If I'd known, 506 00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:22,829 I would have gotten one of these years ago. 507 00:19:22,862 --> 00:19:25,131 I'm sorry I underestimated you. 508 00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:27,700 I guess I liked knowing you depended on me. 509 00:19:27,734 --> 00:19:30,537 I've grown up. 510 00:19:30,570 --> 00:19:32,639 I know it's hard, little brother, 511 00:19:32,672 --> 00:19:34,307 but it's time. 512 00:19:34,341 --> 00:19:36,843 You need to let me go. 513 00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:38,177 Guess I do. 514 00:19:38,211 --> 00:19:40,179 But you were right about one thing -- 515 00:19:40,213 --> 00:19:42,982 I owe you a thank-you for the Honor Society. 516 00:19:43,015 --> 00:19:44,584 Every good habit I have, 517 00:19:44,617 --> 00:19:46,586 I learned from watching you. 518 00:19:46,619 --> 00:19:47,487 Pffft. 519 00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:49,021 As Marcus Aurelius said, 520 00:19:49,055 --> 00:19:53,159 "Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. 521 00:19:53,192 --> 00:19:54,894 Be one." 522 00:19:54,927 --> 00:19:56,195 Wow. 523 00:19:56,229 --> 00:19:57,730 You get that from the dry 524 00:19:57,764 --> 00:19:59,632 From Marvin, who got it from the dry-cleaner's sign. 525 00:20:06,273 --> 00:20:07,740 Good. You're all here. 526 00:20:10,443 --> 00:20:11,611 I've revised my book, 527 00:20:11,644 --> 00:20:13,913 and I'm sending the new pages to Vera. 528 00:20:13,946 --> 00:20:16,549 "Jennifer Hong spots the cold, dead corpse 529 00:20:16,583 --> 00:20:19,218 spilling out of its open bathrobe. 530 00:20:19,252 --> 00:20:23,356 Unafraid to show her humanity, she vomits. 531 00:20:23,390 --> 00:20:25,592 Captain Pemberton-Giles smiles. 532 00:20:25,625 --> 00:20:27,427 'That's why she's the best. 533 00:20:27,460 --> 00:20:30,397 She hasn't forgotten how to feel.'" 534 00:20:30,430 --> 00:20:31,531 -Hmm. -Mm. 535 00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:32,532 It's good. 536 00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:35,234 Oh, I also revised my author bio. 537 00:20:35,268 --> 00:20:36,569 "Jessica Huang -- 538 00:20:36,603 --> 00:20:38,070 wife, mother, 539 00:20:38,104 --> 00:20:40,239 has seen a dead body." 540 00:20:45,645 --> 00:20:46,713 Morning, all! 541 00:20:46,746 --> 00:20:47,747 Slept through literally all of yesterday, 542 00:20:47,780 --> 00:20:50,383 but today I am feeling F-I-N-E fine. 543 00:20:50,417 --> 00:20:52,819 It's so odd -- I haven't heard from Kenny in a while. 544 00:20:52,852 --> 00:20:55,588 He usually calls me to wish me a happy St. Pat's. 545 00:20:55,622 --> 00:20:56,889 Uh, Matthew, 546 00:20:56,923 --> 00:20:59,492 how much do you remember from St. Patrick's Day? 547 00:20:59,526 --> 00:21:01,294 I remember coming to work in a taxi 548 00:21:01,328 --> 00:21:02,929 and dancing a jig 549 00:21:02,962 --> 00:21:04,597 and trading hats with Mark the Bear, 550 00:21:04,631 --> 00:21:06,666 and after that, 551 00:21:06,699 --> 00:21:09,068 um... 552 00:21:09,101 --> 00:21:11,438 it's blur city, man. 553 00:21:11,471 --> 00:21:12,472 Oh. 554 00:21:12,505 --> 00:21:13,973 Um, sit down. 555 00:21:14,006 --> 00:21:15,274 Okay. 556 00:21:17,009 --> 00:21:20,012 I have to tell you something...again. 557 00:21:20,046 --> 00:21:21,280 Uh, but before I start, 558 00:21:21,314 --> 00:21:22,915 just know there is a happy ending. 559 00:21:22,949 --> 00:21:24,517 Oh, I already know I got a tattoo there, 560 00:21:24,551 --> 00:21:25,418 and I'm okay with it.