1 00:00:03,220 --> 00:00:06,049 Big windows, lots of light, finished basement. 2 00:00:06,093 --> 00:00:08,051 Why has this place been sitting on the market so long? 3 00:00:09,444 --> 00:00:12,403 It's a buyer's market, as we have discovered. 4 00:00:12,447 --> 00:00:13,491 Tough time to sell. 5 00:00:13,535 --> 00:00:14,840 Is that why you reduced 6 00:00:14,884 --> 00:00:15,928 the price several times? 7 00:00:19,323 --> 00:00:20,846 You're really getting a steal. 8 00:00:20,890 --> 00:00:22,631 Oh, I saw the patchwork in the basement. 9 00:00:22,674 --> 00:00:24,154 Do you have termite trouble? 10 00:00:25,155 --> 00:00:26,852 Termites? 11 00:00:26,896 --> 00:00:30,247 Well, this house is such a hospitable environment, 12 00:00:30,291 --> 00:00:32,249 who wouldn'twant to live here? 13 00:00:32,293 --> 00:00:33,250 [laughs] 14 00:00:33,294 --> 00:00:35,252 So, what do you say? 15 00:00:35,296 --> 00:00:36,906 You know, you've done a good job renovating, 16 00:00:36,949 --> 00:00:40,388 and it's a great deal, so... 17 00:00:41,954 --> 00:00:43,347 I'll take it.Oh! 18 00:00:43,391 --> 00:00:44,522 [women laughing, cheering] 19 00:00:44,566 --> 00:00:45,697 Boo-yah! 20 00:00:45,741 --> 00:00:47,134 Smart! 21 00:00:47,177 --> 00:00:50,354 You and your family will be very, very happy here. 22 00:00:50,398 --> 00:00:51,312 Oh. Oh, no. I'm not gonna live here. 23 00:00:51,355 --> 00:00:52,965 I'm gonna rent it out. 24 00:00:53,009 --> 00:00:55,707 In this market, renting's where the real money's at. 25 00:00:55,751 --> 00:00:58,188 This place is gonna pay for itself a dozen times over. 26 00:01:01,061 --> 00:01:02,888 Get out of my house!All right! 27 00:01:02,932 --> 00:01:04,281 Bye-bye.[door slams] 28 00:01:04,325 --> 00:01:06,501 --Captions by VITAC-- 29 00:01:06,544 --> 00:01:08,155 ♪ Fresh off the boat 30 00:01:08,198 --> 00:01:09,591 ♪ I'm gettin' mine everywhere I go ♪ 31 00:01:09,634 --> 00:01:11,549 ♪ If you don't know, homey, now you know ♪ 32 00:01:11,593 --> 00:01:13,334 ♪ Fresh off the boat 33 00:01:13,377 --> 00:01:15,466 ♪ Homey, you don't know where I come from ♪ 34 00:01:15,510 --> 00:01:16,989 ♪ But I know where I'm goin' 35 00:01:17,033 --> 00:01:18,861 ♪ I'm fresh off the boat 36 00:01:26,564 --> 00:01:29,524 Jessica, we've been trying to sell this house for months. 37 00:01:29,567 --> 00:01:31,526 We've been through Halloween vandals, 38 00:01:31,569 --> 00:01:33,267 black mold, termites. 39 00:01:33,310 --> 00:01:37,140 Exactly. And after all that, we're only gonna break even. 40 00:01:37,184 --> 00:01:40,361 We're supposed to makemoney on this house. 41 00:01:40,404 --> 00:01:43,494 And if we rent it out, we will. 42 00:01:43,538 --> 00:01:45,279 "We" rent it out? 43 00:01:45,322 --> 00:01:46,802 That man was right. 44 00:01:46,845 --> 00:01:49,500 Why buy a sickly cow and fatten it up 45 00:01:49,544 --> 00:01:50,719 and then sell it for beans? 46 00:01:50,762 --> 00:01:52,024 No. 47 00:01:52,068 --> 00:01:54,853 You milk that cow every month... 48 00:01:54,897 --> 00:01:56,116 for 300 years. 49 00:01:57,378 --> 00:01:59,554 But we don't know anything about being landlords. 50 00:01:59,597 --> 00:02:01,991 You have to find tenants, hire a real-estate attorney, 51 00:02:02,034 --> 00:02:03,558 contracts, credit checks, handyman -- 52 00:02:03,601 --> 00:02:05,603 Eh, that's all fluff. 53 00:02:05,647 --> 00:02:07,649 We just need to find the right tenants. 54 00:02:07,692 --> 00:02:10,217 I will take care of everything. 55 00:02:10,260 --> 00:02:12,871 All you have to do is sit back 56 00:02:12,915 --> 00:02:16,136 and let the rent checks roll in. 57 00:02:17,441 --> 00:02:18,399 [Eddie laughs] 58 00:02:18,442 --> 00:02:20,357 Oh, I love doing crosswords with you. 59 00:02:20,401 --> 00:02:22,881 Such a great way for us to spend time together. 60 00:02:22,925 --> 00:02:25,449 Dad! We found the missing TV remote! 61 00:02:25,493 --> 00:02:27,016 Oh, thank God. These are so boring. 62 00:02:27,059 --> 00:02:27,973 Where was it? 63 00:02:28,017 --> 00:02:30,193 This was a tough case. 64 00:02:30,237 --> 00:02:31,673 Some remotes don't want to be found. 65 00:02:31,716 --> 00:02:34,328 First, we had to rule out the obvious suspects -- 66 00:02:34,371 --> 00:02:36,808 couch cushions, the magazine holder in the bathroom, 67 00:02:36,852 --> 00:02:38,984 Grandma -- but they all checked out. 68 00:02:39,028 --> 00:02:40,377 So where was it? 69 00:02:40,421 --> 00:02:42,205 You left it in the pantry. 70 00:02:42,249 --> 00:02:44,773 The...pantry? That's...odd. 71 00:02:44,816 --> 00:02:46,253 I...don't go in the pantry. 72 00:02:46,296 --> 00:02:48,385 I believe you dogo in the pantry -- 73 00:02:48,429 --> 00:02:51,997 to cry after you watch a certain movie called "Babe." 74 00:02:52,041 --> 00:02:53,912 "That'll do, pig. 75 00:02:53,956 --> 00:02:55,175 [voice breaking] That'll do." 76 00:02:56,654 --> 00:02:59,048 Well [chuckles] you found the remote. 77 00:02:59,091 --> 00:03:00,484 Thank you. [sniffles] 78 00:03:00,528 --> 00:03:02,094 Here's a little something for your trouble. 79 00:03:03,270 --> 00:03:05,576 EMERY: Thanks, but we don't do it for the money. 80 00:03:05,620 --> 00:03:07,448 We do it for justice. 81 00:03:07,491 --> 00:03:09,363 But w-we'll take the money, though. 82 00:03:09,406 --> 00:03:11,408 Another cased solved by The Huang Boys -- 83 00:03:11,452 --> 00:03:13,280 a perfect nine for nine. 84 00:03:13,323 --> 00:03:16,065 Tell your friends. 85 00:03:16,108 --> 00:03:17,936 LOUIS: "Tell your friends." 86 00:03:19,634 --> 00:03:21,853 Yo, Dad, since you're handing out free money, 87 00:03:21,897 --> 00:03:25,596 this is the Ironman watch, and I need it on my body. 88 00:03:25,640 --> 00:03:28,425 It has a lap timer, a stainless-steel case back, 89 00:03:28,469 --> 00:03:31,646 and it's water-resistant up to 100 meters. 90 00:03:31,689 --> 00:03:33,213 [splash] 91 00:03:34,431 --> 00:03:36,651 Aaaaaaaah! 92 00:03:39,436 --> 00:03:40,394 LOUIS: Ohhh. 93 00:03:40,437 --> 00:03:41,482 So you're a watch guy 94 00:03:41,525 --> 00:03:42,483 like your old man. 95 00:03:42,526 --> 00:03:44,398 [chuckles] I remember my first -- 96 00:03:44,441 --> 00:03:48,402 gold Casio, mini calculator, programmable alarm. 97 00:03:48,445 --> 00:03:49,838 You should have seen it. [chuckles] 98 00:03:49,881 --> 00:03:51,448 Oh, wait. You cansee it. 99 00:03:51,492 --> 00:03:52,710 Because it's right here. 100 00:03:53,581 --> 00:03:54,321 [alarm beeping] 101 00:03:54,364 --> 00:03:56,497 Ah. Listen to her sing. 102 00:03:56,540 --> 00:03:59,456 That's the gentle tweeting of a punctual robot bird. 103 00:03:59,500 --> 00:04:01,110 [chuckles] 104 00:04:01,153 --> 00:04:02,633 I knew you'd feel me, Dad. 105 00:04:02,677 --> 00:04:04,331 So, want to give me cash or... 106 00:04:04,374 --> 00:04:07,290 [chuckles] 107 00:04:07,334 --> 00:04:09,510 [both laughing] 108 00:04:19,041 --> 00:04:20,303 Oh. 109 00:04:20,347 --> 00:04:22,174 ♪♪ 110 00:04:22,218 --> 00:04:24,916 So...why should I rent to you? 111 00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:27,397 Because I'm a family man, and my kids come first. 112 00:04:27,441 --> 00:04:28,529 I work for a nonprofit. 113 00:04:28,572 --> 00:04:29,486 I served three tours in the Navy, 114 00:04:29,530 --> 00:04:30,792 and I'm now teaching -- 115 00:04:30,835 --> 00:04:32,533 I'm Jordan. This is my wife, Raquel. 116 00:04:32,576 --> 00:04:34,186 We filled out your application 117 00:04:34,230 --> 00:04:36,145 and included our college transcripts and LSAT scores. 118 00:04:36,188 --> 00:04:37,451 Hope that's okay. 119 00:04:37,494 --> 00:04:39,322 LSATs? So you're lawyers? 120 00:04:39,366 --> 00:04:41,498 Well, we're not in law anymore. 121 00:04:41,542 --> 00:04:43,979 We're in medicine now. It's just much more lucrative. 122 00:04:45,459 --> 00:04:46,547 I suppose it is. 123 00:04:46,590 --> 00:04:48,505 Um, okay. No pets? 124 00:04:48,549 --> 00:04:49,811 Nonsmokers? 125 00:04:49,854 --> 00:04:50,986 No weekend jazz bands? 126 00:04:52,204 --> 00:04:54,903 You seem perfect. 127 00:04:54,946 --> 00:04:56,557 A little tooperfect. 128 00:04:56,600 --> 00:04:58,559 Sweetie... 129 00:04:58,602 --> 00:05:00,256 she deserves to know. 130 00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:01,605 I knew it. What is it? 131 00:05:01,649 --> 00:05:03,999 We never want to have kids. 132 00:05:04,042 --> 00:05:05,392 [sighs] 133 00:05:08,395 --> 00:05:09,483 [cartoon playing on television] 134 00:05:09,526 --> 00:05:11,093 [chuckles] 135 00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:14,836 [TV turns off]Father, I'd just like to follow up 136 00:05:14,879 --> 00:05:15,924 on our conversation yesterday. 137 00:05:15,967 --> 00:05:17,360 [sighs] 138 00:05:17,404 --> 00:05:18,840 You're veryclose to me right now. 139 00:05:18,883 --> 00:05:20,929 While I explained the benefits of watch ownership, 140 00:05:20,972 --> 00:05:22,583 I didn't tell you all the ways 141 00:05:22,626 --> 00:05:24,976 that not having a watch is ruining my life. 142 00:05:25,020 --> 00:05:26,978 Could you just back up an inch? 143 00:05:28,197 --> 00:05:29,546 When we're ordering pizza, 144 00:05:29,590 --> 00:05:32,070 I have no idea if it takes 30 minutes or less. 145 00:05:32,114 --> 00:05:33,594 I'm like, "You're late." 146 00:05:33,637 --> 00:05:34,812 The guy's like, "Where's your proof?" 147 00:05:34,856 --> 00:05:36,510 And I'm like, "Right here. 148 00:05:36,553 --> 00:05:37,815 Oh." 149 00:05:37,859 --> 00:05:40,644 Eddie, don't make everything about pizza. 150 00:05:40,688 --> 00:05:41,863 This is about responsibility. 151 00:05:41,906 --> 00:05:43,517 I know if I buy you that watch, 152 00:05:43,560 --> 00:05:45,257 you'll wear it for one day, then toss it aside. 153 00:05:45,301 --> 00:05:46,868 I promise I won't. 154 00:05:46,911 --> 00:05:48,522 I'll tell you what -- 155 00:05:48,565 --> 00:05:51,089 If you can take care of my watch for one week 156 00:05:51,133 --> 00:05:52,743 and prove to me that you're responsible, 157 00:05:52,787 --> 00:05:55,529 then maybe I'll think about buying you an Ironman watch. 158 00:05:55,572 --> 00:05:56,747 Yes! Deal! 159 00:05:56,791 --> 00:05:58,401 [grunts] 160 00:05:58,445 --> 00:06:00,664 Now, let me just give you a quick lay of the land. 161 00:06:00,708 --> 00:06:02,318 Watch out for her light. It's a little fickle. 162 00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:04,538 She feeds on arm hair, so be careful. 163 00:06:04,581 --> 00:06:06,540 The 7 button on the calculator is broken, 164 00:06:06,583 --> 00:06:08,455 so you have to add the 3 and 4 first. 165 00:06:08,498 --> 00:06:10,239 Or 2 and 5. However you want to do it. 166 00:06:10,282 --> 00:06:11,458 I don't want to micromanage that. 167 00:06:11,501 --> 00:06:14,591 Or 8 minus 1. Whatever. User's choice. 168 00:06:14,635 --> 00:06:15,853 ♪♪ 169 00:06:18,334 --> 00:06:21,206 Youget a Chipwich, and youget a Chipwich! 170 00:06:21,250 --> 00:06:23,774 Do you know why it is raining Chipwiches? 171 00:06:23,818 --> 00:06:26,124 Because I just found us 172 00:06:26,168 --> 00:06:29,519 the perfect renters.You did? 173 00:06:29,563 --> 00:06:31,347 Just deposited their check in my account. 174 00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:33,305 I'll write you both checks for your share! 175 00:06:36,178 --> 00:06:38,441 This is mymoney that Iearned. 176 00:06:38,485 --> 00:06:40,661 It's not Marvin's money. It's mymoney. 177 00:06:40,704 --> 00:06:42,532 I got Honey money. 178 00:06:42,576 --> 00:06:45,622 Good thing I convinced you both to invest in the property 179 00:06:45,666 --> 00:06:48,016 and convinced you both to rent it out, 180 00:06:48,059 --> 00:06:49,539 because I'm a visionary. 181 00:06:49,583 --> 00:06:50,714 Oprah. 182 00:06:50,758 --> 00:06:51,715 Gayles. 183 00:06:51,759 --> 00:06:53,413 [telephone rings] 184 00:06:54,631 --> 00:06:56,285 Huang residence. 185 00:06:56,328 --> 00:06:57,721 Is this Mrs. Huang? 186 00:06:57,765 --> 00:06:58,592 Yes, this is she. 187 00:06:58,635 --> 00:07:00,158 I'm calling to inform you 188 00:07:00,202 --> 00:07:02,552 that the check you just deposited bounced. 189 00:07:03,988 --> 00:07:06,034 What? [gasps] 190 00:07:06,077 --> 00:07:07,601 I don't understand. 191 00:07:07,644 --> 00:07:08,863 I know it's confusing. 192 00:07:08,906 --> 00:07:11,387 The word "bounce" seems so positive -- 193 00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:12,519 like Tigger. 194 00:07:12,562 --> 00:07:14,651 I don't understand 195 00:07:14,695 --> 00:07:17,698 how my ear appointment can be approaching. 196 00:07:17,741 --> 00:07:18,655 [chuckles] It feels like it was just yesterday. 197 00:07:18,699 --> 00:07:21,702 Okay, well, bye. 198 00:07:22,746 --> 00:07:24,487 Come on, come on. Write our checks. 199 00:07:26,663 --> 00:07:27,925 Yes. 200 00:07:29,797 --> 00:07:31,712 [smacks lips] 201 00:07:31,755 --> 00:07:33,278 Yes. 202 00:07:33,322 --> 00:07:34,715 Your checks. Ha ha. 203 00:07:34,758 --> 00:07:38,458 Here...you... 204 00:07:42,810 --> 00:07:43,767 [smacks lips] 205 00:07:44,768 --> 00:07:45,769 ...go. 206 00:07:51,732 --> 00:07:52,950 Yes! Thank you. 207 00:07:56,780 --> 00:07:58,739 [knock on door] 208 00:07:58,782 --> 00:07:59,522 Oh! 209 00:07:59,566 --> 00:08:01,176 Hi, Jessica. Hey. 210 00:08:01,219 --> 00:08:03,439 Hi. So, there's been some kind of a mistake. 211 00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:04,658 The bank called yesterday, 212 00:08:04,701 --> 00:08:07,530 and they said that your check bounced. 213 00:08:07,574 --> 00:08:09,576 Oh, you know why? 214 00:08:09,619 --> 00:08:11,360 That's probably because there's no money in our account. 215 00:08:11,403 --> 00:08:13,231 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's for sure it. 216 00:08:13,275 --> 00:08:14,276 Yeah. 217 00:08:21,413 --> 00:08:23,677 What do you mean, you have no money? 218 00:08:23,720 --> 00:08:24,895 Eh... Buh... 219 00:08:24,939 --> 00:08:25,809 [both laugh] 220 00:08:25,853 --> 00:08:26,897 It's kind of a long story. 221 00:08:26,941 --> 00:08:28,290 Come in, come in.Come on. 222 00:08:29,813 --> 00:08:32,816 Please, have a seat. 223 00:08:32,860 --> 00:08:34,601 We're having cash-flow problems. 224 00:08:34,644 --> 00:08:36,603 But I thought you were doctors. 225 00:08:36,646 --> 00:08:38,735 [chuckling] Oh, no. God, no. 226 00:08:38,779 --> 00:08:41,695 We were enrolled as guinea pigs in these drug trials, 227 00:08:41,738 --> 00:08:43,261 but then we got disqualified. 228 00:08:43,305 --> 00:08:44,915 Yeah, when we said we were in medicine, 229 00:08:44,959 --> 00:08:46,787 I guess, technically, the medicine was in us. 230 00:08:46,830 --> 00:08:49,050 So, I guess you didn't go to law school, either? 231 00:08:49,093 --> 00:08:50,573 Oh, no, no, no. We did. We did. 232 00:08:50,617 --> 00:08:52,575 We just...hated it. 233 00:08:52,619 --> 00:08:54,969 It was so long and boring and expensive, 234 00:08:55,012 --> 00:08:57,362 which is why we're so deep in debt. 235 00:08:57,406 --> 00:08:59,756 Honestly, we were surprised you rented the house to us, 236 00:08:59,800 --> 00:09:01,758 especially when you saw our credit report. 237 00:09:01,802 --> 00:09:03,630 Fffft! Credit checks are fluff! 238 00:09:03,673 --> 00:09:06,720 Thisis my credit check -- my gut. 239 00:09:06,763 --> 00:09:09,723 Then your gut's as bad as mine after that trial IBS drug. 240 00:09:09,766 --> 00:09:11,594 Speaking of, the toilet's backed up. 241 00:09:11,638 --> 00:09:13,596 Can we get the number for the handyman? 242 00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:14,858 Fluff! 243 00:09:14,902 --> 00:09:16,643 You know what? Forget this. 244 00:09:16,686 --> 00:09:18,035 Pack your -- 245 00:09:18,079 --> 00:09:19,602 HONEY [singsong voice]: Knock, knock! 246 00:09:19,646 --> 00:09:21,256 Didn't mean to interrupt, 247 00:09:21,299 --> 00:09:23,563 but we just wanted to stop by and meet the new tenants. 248 00:09:25,477 --> 00:09:28,829 Yes. These are them -- our perfect tenants. 249 00:09:28,872 --> 00:09:31,658 Jessica's been raving about you guys. 250 00:09:31,701 --> 00:09:33,877 Guess who spent her share on a fancy hat-of-the-month club. 251 00:09:40,492 --> 00:09:41,798 [car alarm chirps] 252 00:09:41,842 --> 00:09:44,235 MALE VOICE: Protected by Viper. Stand back. 253 00:09:44,279 --> 00:09:45,846 It's nice to meet you. 254 00:09:45,889 --> 00:09:48,326 Want to come in and play "Geese Lord"? 255 00:09:48,370 --> 00:09:51,721 You know what? We would love to, but we just can't. 256 00:09:51,765 --> 00:09:53,680 We're very, very busy. 257 00:09:59,686 --> 00:10:01,078 BAREFOOT DAVE: So, apparently, my dad 258 00:10:01,122 --> 00:10:03,428 has been sending letters to our old address, 259 00:10:03,472 --> 00:10:06,083 but, honestly, he's been gone from my life for so long now, 260 00:10:06,127 --> 00:10:07,694 I wonder if I even want him around. 261 00:10:07,737 --> 00:10:08,869 How do you miss someone who -- 262 00:10:08,912 --> 00:10:09,783 Hold up! 263 00:10:09,826 --> 00:10:10,914 Where's my watch?! 264 00:10:10,958 --> 00:10:12,524 Where's my dad?! 265 00:10:13,743 --> 00:10:14,918 ♪♪ 266 00:10:22,839 --> 00:10:24,362 I lost Dad's watch! 267 00:10:24,406 --> 00:10:25,799 Give us all the details. 268 00:10:25,842 --> 00:10:27,931 I had taken it off to shower on Saturday. 269 00:10:27,975 --> 00:10:29,367 I know I put it in a safe place -- 270 00:10:29,411 --> 00:10:30,586 on top of G-Dubs. 271 00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:32,675 One witness -- toy glowworm. 272 00:10:32,719 --> 00:10:35,025 And then, I don't remember. 273 00:10:35,069 --> 00:10:37,027 I don't know if I put it back on afterwards. 274 00:10:37,071 --> 00:10:38,725 Maybe. I don't know! 275 00:10:38,768 --> 00:10:40,683 Client's memory unreliable. 276 00:10:40,727 --> 00:10:43,817 Possible victim of amnesia. 277 00:10:43,860 --> 00:10:45,645 The Huang Boys are on the case. 278 00:10:46,515 --> 00:10:48,691 [glove snaps]We need to dust for fingerprints. 279 00:10:48,735 --> 00:10:50,345 I'll get the flour. 280 00:10:50,388 --> 00:10:51,476 [sighs] 281 00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:52,913 HONEY: Need a ride? 282 00:10:52,956 --> 00:10:54,044 Oh, is that -- 283 00:10:54,088 --> 00:10:55,611 My leased Probe? 284 00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:57,831 Yes. Yes, it is. 285 00:10:57,874 --> 00:10:58,919 She's got a full tank of gas. 286 00:10:58,962 --> 00:11:00,747 If we wanted, we could probably make it 287 00:11:00,790 --> 00:11:02,487 all the way to N'awlins. 288 00:11:02,531 --> 00:11:03,837 Oh. [laughs] I can't. 289 00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:06,491 Uh, I-I have to go check on the tenants. 290 00:11:06,535 --> 00:11:08,885 Turns out there's a little plumbing issue. 291 00:11:08,929 --> 00:11:10,757 Oh, no. Well, then, I'll come help. 292 00:11:10,800 --> 00:11:13,063 Oh, no! No, no, no. It's fine. I got it. 293 00:11:13,107 --> 00:11:16,501 I wasgonna go anyway, because... 294 00:11:16,545 --> 00:11:17,720 [squeals] 295 00:11:17,764 --> 00:11:19,504 ...I got them a welcome gift basket. 296 00:11:19,548 --> 00:11:21,376 Oh, perfect! I'll give it to them. 297 00:11:21,419 --> 00:11:23,857 Oh, that's so nice of you to think of this. 298 00:11:23,900 --> 00:11:25,423 You know, that's why we're great partners -- 299 00:11:25,467 --> 00:11:26,903 because you think of these kind of things. 300 00:11:26,947 --> 00:11:29,340 Now, go to N'awlins, you nosy bitch! 301 00:11:29,384 --> 00:11:31,734 [laughing] All right. 302 00:11:35,129 --> 00:11:37,131 Hi. How's it going? 303 00:11:37,174 --> 00:11:38,306 Oh! 304 00:11:38,349 --> 00:11:39,786 [laughs] Hey, Jessica. 305 00:11:39,829 --> 00:11:42,963 I was just trying to drive beers into the living room. 306 00:11:43,006 --> 00:11:44,138 What's up? 307 00:11:44,181 --> 00:11:46,009 If you have money to waste 308 00:11:46,053 --> 00:11:48,969 on pizza and video games and tiny cars, 309 00:11:49,012 --> 00:11:50,884 you have money for rent. 310 00:11:50,927 --> 00:11:51,972 Move. 311 00:11:55,584 --> 00:11:56,890 [grunts] 312 00:11:56,933 --> 00:11:58,500 No more cable. Nonessential. 313 00:11:59,501 --> 00:12:03,548 No more takeout. Make your own food. 314 00:12:03,592 --> 00:12:05,812 This is a schedule for the Florida bar. 315 00:12:05,855 --> 00:12:09,163 You're gonna hit the books and pass it. 316 00:12:09,206 --> 00:12:10,555 Get real jobs. 317 00:12:10,599 --> 00:12:11,774 Yeah. Okay. 318 00:12:11,818 --> 00:12:13,123 Yeah, I mean, we're not good with money, 319 00:12:13,167 --> 00:12:14,995 so this is actually really helpful. 320 00:12:15,038 --> 00:12:17,388 And until you pay me what you owe me, 321 00:12:17,432 --> 00:12:18,259 you're the handyman. 322 00:12:18,302 --> 00:12:20,000 Fix the toilet yourself. 323 00:12:20,043 --> 00:12:22,045 And fix up the place while you're at it. 324 00:12:22,089 --> 00:12:23,830 Add value. 325 00:12:23,873 --> 00:12:25,396 Maybe a blueberry patch. 326 00:12:26,267 --> 00:12:27,790 Yeah. Mm-hmm. 327 00:12:27,834 --> 00:12:28,878 ♪♪ 328 00:12:30,924 --> 00:12:32,926 Sorry, G-Dubs. We're almost done. 329 00:12:32,969 --> 00:12:35,319 EVAN: I think he likes it. 330 00:12:37,626 --> 00:12:40,020 Boys, I need your help. 331 00:12:40,063 --> 00:12:40,934 I lost Eddie's watch. 332 00:12:40,977 --> 00:12:42,762 Twist. 333 00:12:43,937 --> 00:12:45,242 Talk to us.Well, 334 00:12:45,286 --> 00:12:47,418 on Saturday, I walked past Eddie's room 335 00:12:47,462 --> 00:12:50,639 and saw he had carelessly left my watch lying on his bed. 336 00:12:50,682 --> 00:12:52,815 So I took it to teach him a lesson. 337 00:12:52,859 --> 00:12:54,034 And then I lost it. 338 00:12:54,077 --> 00:12:55,818 Possible irony. 339 00:12:55,862 --> 00:12:56,993 EMERY: Dad, Eddie took off the watch 340 00:12:57,037 --> 00:12:58,647 because it was his shower day. 341 00:12:58,690 --> 00:13:00,649 His shower day is on Sunday. 342 00:13:00,692 --> 00:13:02,390 He switched it to Saturdays 343 00:13:02,433 --> 00:13:04,174 because he gets so worked up during "American Gladiators." 344 00:13:04,218 --> 00:13:05,741 [Cheering on television] 345 00:13:08,962 --> 00:13:11,094 Gladiators, ready! 346 00:13:11,138 --> 00:13:13,880 Oh, no. He just took it off to shower. 347 00:13:13,923 --> 00:13:17,492 I need you to find that watch before the end of the week. 348 00:13:17,535 --> 00:13:19,059 And whatever you do, don't tell Eddie. 349 00:13:19,102 --> 00:13:22,018 Permission to extend bedtime so we can solve the case? 350 00:13:22,062 --> 00:13:25,892 Crime doesn't sleep, and neither should you. 351 00:13:25,935 --> 00:13:27,807 [chicken clucking] 352 00:13:31,332 --> 00:13:32,289 The hell? 353 00:13:32,333 --> 00:13:34,074 "Fiduciary." 354 00:13:34,117 --> 00:13:35,858 [both laugh] 355 00:13:35,902 --> 00:13:38,078 Why is there a chicken on the front lawn? Oh. 356 00:13:38,121 --> 00:13:41,037 We took your advice about making our own food to save money, 357 00:13:41,081 --> 00:13:42,473 so we got some chickens, 358 00:13:42,517 --> 00:13:44,258 and it cut our breakfast budget to zero. 359 00:13:44,301 --> 00:13:45,520 What are you -- 360 00:13:45,563 --> 00:13:47,043 Zero? No kidding. 361 00:13:47,087 --> 00:13:48,523 We had to pay for the chickens 362 00:13:48,566 --> 00:13:50,046 and the materials to build the coops 363 00:13:50,090 --> 00:13:51,787 and the food and the vet bills -- 364 00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:53,310 we got them microchipped -- 365 00:13:53,354 --> 00:13:54,921 so the savings should kick in in about two months. 366 00:13:55,965 --> 00:13:57,358 Out! Get out! 367 00:13:57,401 --> 00:13:58,750 You two are hopeless! 368 00:13:58,794 --> 00:14:00,448 Pack your bags. I'm evicting you. 369 00:14:00,491 --> 00:14:03,320 Oh, we're not leaving. 370 00:14:03,364 --> 00:14:05,366 Mnh. Since you made us study for the bar, 371 00:14:05,409 --> 00:14:08,021 we remembered that we have these things called rights. 372 00:14:08,064 --> 00:14:10,458 Yeah. Legally, you can't kick us out. 373 00:14:10,501 --> 00:14:12,155 If you did, we could have youarrested. 374 00:14:12,199 --> 00:14:13,243 Sorry. 375 00:14:13,287 --> 00:14:15,158 No hard feelings. Here.Uh... 376 00:14:15,202 --> 00:14:17,944 These are for you. 377 00:14:20,076 --> 00:14:22,296 Ohh! They're warm! 378 00:14:22,339 --> 00:14:24,907 I don't want your warm, homemade butt eggs! 379 00:14:24,951 --> 00:14:26,604 You're gonna love them.Yeah. 380 00:14:35,004 --> 00:14:36,353 ♪ Whoop, whoop, that's the sound of the police ♪ 381 00:14:36,397 --> 00:14:37,964 ♪ Whoop, whoop, that's the sound of the beast ♪ 382 00:14:38,007 --> 00:14:38,965 ♪ Whoop, whoop [horn honking] 383 00:14:39,008 --> 00:14:40,183 Hey! 384 00:14:40,227 --> 00:14:41,706 ♪ Whoop, whoop Pull over! 385 00:14:41,750 --> 00:14:43,708 ♪ That's the sound of the beast ♪ 386 00:14:43,752 --> 00:14:45,188 ♪ Whoop, whoop, that's the sound of the police ♪ 387 00:14:45,232 --> 00:14:46,755 Yeah, right there. Stay. 388 00:14:46,798 --> 00:14:48,191 ♪ That's the sound of the beast ♪ 389 00:14:49,453 --> 00:14:51,847 ♪ Whoop, whoop, that's the sound of the police ♪ 390 00:14:55,024 --> 00:14:57,418 I know I was speeding, but my sister -- 391 00:14:57,461 --> 00:14:59,202 Oh. Hi, Jessica. 392 00:14:59,246 --> 00:15:01,074 Officer Bryson, I need your help. 393 00:15:01,117 --> 00:15:03,598 I've got deadbeat law students in my house. 394 00:15:03,641 --> 00:15:05,078 I rented the investment property to them, 395 00:15:05,121 --> 00:15:06,993 and they refuse to leave. 396 00:15:07,036 --> 00:15:08,995 Oh, so you've got squatters. 397 00:15:09,038 --> 00:15:12,215 That is the perfect, disgusting word for what they are. 398 00:15:12,259 --> 00:15:14,174 Unfortunately, I can't help you. 399 00:15:14,217 --> 00:15:15,784 The law is very much on their side. 400 00:15:15,827 --> 00:15:17,133 You can't just turn them out. 401 00:15:17,177 --> 00:15:19,744 So they can just stay in my house, 402 00:15:19,788 --> 00:15:21,311 not pay rent, 403 00:15:21,355 --> 00:15:23,400 and I can't do anything about it? 404 00:15:24,358 --> 00:15:27,100 These people are not my mother-in-law. 405 00:15:28,231 --> 00:15:29,015 So, can I go? 406 00:15:29,058 --> 00:15:31,365 Just remember -- 407 00:15:31,408 --> 00:15:33,976 driving is a privilege. [knocks] 408 00:15:34,020 --> 00:15:36,239 ♪ Whoop, whoop, that's the sound of the police ♪ 409 00:15:41,244 --> 00:15:42,376 Any progress? We're running out of time. 410 00:15:42,419 --> 00:15:45,118 Good news, Dad. We heard back from Casio. 411 00:15:45,161 --> 00:15:48,599 Turns out, the watch was manufactured in 1985. 412 00:15:48,643 --> 00:15:51,559 Your story checks out. You're no longer a suspect. 413 00:15:51,602 --> 00:15:53,604 Guys! What's going on with -- 414 00:15:53,648 --> 00:15:55,215 Dad! 415 00:15:55,258 --> 00:15:56,172 What are you doing here? 416 00:15:56,216 --> 00:15:58,827 Oh, nothing. Just, uh, coming in to... 417 00:15:58,870 --> 00:16:00,568 ruffle the hair of my boys. 418 00:16:00,611 --> 00:16:02,396 [chuckles] 419 00:16:02,439 --> 00:16:05,138 Oh, well, I also... came to ruffle. 420 00:16:05,181 --> 00:16:07,923 [chuckles] 421 00:16:07,967 --> 00:16:10,708 There you are. 422 00:16:16,410 --> 00:16:18,107 All right, then. Uh, yeah. I'll see you later, then. 423 00:16:18,151 --> 00:16:19,891 Yeah, see you around. Oh. 424 00:16:19,935 --> 00:16:22,242 [door closes] 425 00:16:22,285 --> 00:16:24,244 ♪♪ 426 00:16:24,287 --> 00:16:25,680 You're sure you want me to shut the power off? 427 00:16:25,723 --> 00:16:27,638 They've left me no choice, Jerry. 428 00:16:27,682 --> 00:16:30,076 I tried to teach them. They refused to learn. 429 00:16:30,119 --> 00:16:32,643 I went to the law. The law turned its back on me. 430 00:16:32,687 --> 00:16:34,210 Shut it down. 431 00:16:36,691 --> 00:16:38,345 Now turn off the water. 432 00:16:42,349 --> 00:16:44,481 Now sic this stray cat on the chickens. 433 00:16:46,657 --> 00:16:48,659 [cat meows] 434 00:16:52,663 --> 00:16:55,362 She's got the scent. Send her in. 435 00:16:57,886 --> 00:16:59,453 [meowing] 436 00:16:59,496 --> 00:17:02,760 She's formulating a plan of attack. 437 00:17:02,804 --> 00:17:04,284 Apex predator. 438 00:17:04,327 --> 00:17:06,329 [meows] 439 00:17:06,373 --> 00:17:07,722 [insects chirping] 440 00:17:11,987 --> 00:17:13,119 No. 441 00:17:13,162 --> 00:17:15,295 Candlelight is so romantic. 442 00:17:15,338 --> 00:17:19,429 And who needs water when we have ♪ margaritas? 443 00:17:19,473 --> 00:17:22,911 No ice, so they're room-temp, just like in Mexico. 444 00:17:22,954 --> 00:17:24,695 Mexico's nailing it.[chuckles] 445 00:17:24,739 --> 00:17:26,088 Mm! 446 00:17:26,132 --> 00:17:28,438 Oh, baby, look. Look at them. 447 00:17:28,482 --> 00:17:29,961 [chuckling] Oh! 448 00:17:30,005 --> 00:17:33,095 [clucking, purring] 449 00:17:33,139 --> 00:17:35,402 Man taught you to hate each other, but you said no. 450 00:17:37,143 --> 00:17:38,187 Should we have a kid? 451 00:17:38,231 --> 00:17:39,188 Yeah. I want that. 452 00:17:39,232 --> 00:17:40,537 Okay, good. 453 00:17:40,581 --> 00:17:42,800 [both chuckling] 454 00:17:42,844 --> 00:17:45,151 [alarm beeping] 455 00:17:45,194 --> 00:17:46,935 [gasps] 456 00:17:46,978 --> 00:17:48,502 Thank God! The Huang Boys did it! 457 00:17:48,545 --> 00:17:50,156 ♪ Yeah 458 00:17:50,199 --> 00:17:52,158 Well, Dad, It's the end of the week, 459 00:17:52,201 --> 00:17:54,116 and I still have your watch, like I said I would. 460 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:56,510 Well, look at that! Impressive. 461 00:17:56,553 --> 00:17:58,512 I never should have doubted you, Eddie. 462 00:17:58,555 --> 00:18:01,732 We solved it! We found the missing watch! 463 00:18:01,776 --> 00:18:02,820 Wait. 464 00:18:02,864 --> 00:18:04,300 If that's yourwatch, 465 00:18:04,344 --> 00:18:07,347 then... whose watch is this? 466 00:18:07,390 --> 00:18:10,350 It's a new one. I bought it. 467 00:18:10,393 --> 00:18:12,613 I saw my watch lying in your room, 468 00:18:12,656 --> 00:18:14,005 and I thought you were being careless, 469 00:18:14,049 --> 00:18:15,398 so I took it to teach you a lesson. 470 00:18:15,442 --> 00:18:17,748 [alarm beeping]I shouldn't have -- 471 00:18:19,750 --> 00:18:21,012 That's my robot bird. 472 00:18:21,056 --> 00:18:22,971 It isn't either of thesewatches. 473 00:18:23,014 --> 00:18:25,234 [beeping continues] 474 00:18:27,062 --> 00:18:29,238 Ma, why do you have my watch? 475 00:18:35,244 --> 00:18:37,028 But I'm yourson. 476 00:18:37,072 --> 00:18:38,595 Why are you messing with me? 477 00:18:39,596 --> 00:18:41,076 Mm. 478 00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:42,643 Wait -- if Grandma has your watch 479 00:18:42,686 --> 00:18:45,733 and this is the watch you bought to replace it, 480 00:18:45,776 --> 00:18:49,389 then whose watch do Evan and Emery have? 481 00:18:51,347 --> 00:18:54,089 [sighs] We bought it -- with our justice fund! 482 00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:55,525 We'd solved every case, 483 00:18:55,569 --> 00:18:57,048 and we didn't want to ruin our perfect record. 484 00:19:00,008 --> 00:19:02,402 Looks like the real victim in all of this 485 00:19:02,445 --> 00:19:03,751 was the truth. 486 00:19:03,794 --> 00:19:05,492 I'm too young for this crap. 487 00:19:08,277 --> 00:19:09,322 Squatters? 488 00:19:09,365 --> 00:19:10,975 They won't leave. 489 00:19:11,019 --> 00:19:12,325 I thought you said that -- 490 00:19:12,368 --> 00:19:15,676 I didn't know how to tell you I was wrong. 491 00:19:15,719 --> 00:19:18,026 I got us into this situation, 492 00:19:18,069 --> 00:19:19,897 and now I don't know how to get out. 493 00:19:19,941 --> 00:19:22,900 So, those checks you wrote us came out of your own account? 494 00:19:22,944 --> 00:19:25,251 Yes. [sighs] 495 00:19:25,294 --> 00:19:26,774 I'm surprised you were able to cash them. 496 00:19:26,817 --> 00:19:28,471 I signed them "Montana Moorehead." 497 00:19:28,515 --> 00:19:32,388 I don't understand why you didn't just tell us the truth. 498 00:19:32,432 --> 00:19:34,477 Because I'm supposed to be a visionary. 499 00:19:34,521 --> 00:19:37,088 I'm supposed to be Oprah. 500 00:19:37,132 --> 00:19:41,092 You invested your money in that house because of me, 501 00:19:41,136 --> 00:19:43,443 and it's been nothing but problems. 502 00:19:43,486 --> 00:19:46,315 I convinced you to trust me, 503 00:19:46,359 --> 00:19:47,490 and I failed. 504 00:19:52,539 --> 00:19:54,410 Did you know Oprah got fired? 505 00:19:55,411 --> 00:19:57,239 What? 506 00:19:57,283 --> 00:20:00,895 Early in her career, from a local news station in Baltimore. 507 00:20:00,938 --> 00:20:03,289 Did she let that stop her? 508 00:20:03,332 --> 00:20:04,594 Did she give up? 509 00:20:04,638 --> 00:20:06,727 Did she take her lapel mic and go home? 510 00:20:06,770 --> 00:20:08,294 No. 511 00:20:08,337 --> 00:20:10,383 No. That's right. 512 00:20:10,426 --> 00:20:12,167 She didn't. 513 00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:13,516 And neither will you. 514 00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:15,736 So, this first investment property didn't work out. 515 00:20:15,779 --> 00:20:17,607 So what? 516 00:20:17,651 --> 00:20:19,305 The next one will. 517 00:20:19,348 --> 00:20:20,958 The important thing is that you keep going, 518 00:20:21,002 --> 00:20:22,525 and before you know it, 519 00:20:22,569 --> 00:20:24,353 you'll have a horse farm and your own book club. 520 00:20:25,485 --> 00:20:27,748 Thank you, Honey. 521 00:20:27,791 --> 00:20:32,231 Now I know Oprah can be Oprah because she has Gayle. 522 00:20:33,319 --> 00:20:35,495 And Gayle can be Gayle because she has Oprah. 523 00:20:35,538 --> 00:20:37,366 Sure. 524 00:20:37,410 --> 00:20:38,498 Maybe. 525 00:20:38,541 --> 00:20:39,760 No. 526 00:20:39,803 --> 00:20:42,241 Yeah, that was too far. I felt it. 527 00:20:46,462 --> 00:20:48,899 Okay, so, I know 528 00:20:48,943 --> 00:20:50,901 we made a little less from the sale than expected, 529 00:20:50,945 --> 00:20:55,471 but at least the squatters are now the new owner's problem. 530 00:20:55,515 --> 00:20:57,299 Here. Take your share. 531 00:20:59,345 --> 00:21:01,303 Or...reinvest it. 532 00:21:01,347 --> 00:21:03,653 Jessica, I don't know. 533 00:21:03,697 --> 00:21:05,960 I just feel lucky not to have lost money. 534 00:21:08,267 --> 00:21:09,746 Oh, okay. That's fair. 535 00:21:09,790 --> 00:21:12,706 Here. Take your checks. 536 00:21:12,749 --> 00:21:15,012 Or...reinvest it. 537 00:21:15,056 --> 00:21:17,667 What does Florida have more of than any other state? 538 00:21:17,711 --> 00:21:19,365 Alligators? 539 00:21:19,408 --> 00:21:20,583 Fuddruckers. 540 00:21:20,627 --> 00:21:22,324 Condominiums. 541 00:21:22,368 --> 00:21:25,153 Or, as I like to call them, condo-money-ums. 542 00:21:27,155 --> 00:21:29,157 Well, now we haveto do it.