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♪ ♪

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[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

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>> John: WELCOME, WELCOME,

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WELCOME TO "LAST WEEK TONIGHT!"

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I'M JOHN OLIVER.

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THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR JOINING

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US.

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JUST TIME FOR A QUICK RECAP OF

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THE WEEK, AND AS THIS IS OUR

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FINAL SHOW OF 2021, WE THOUGHT

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WE'D CHECK IN ON THE EVENT THAT

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STARTED ALL OF IT, THE JANUARY 6

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INSURRECTION.

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THAT'S RIGHT.

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THIS YEAR STARTED WITH THAT AND,

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AGAINST ALL BETTER JUDGMENT,

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KEPT GOING.

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AND WHILE THE HUMAN CAUSE OF THE

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RIOTS IS STILL STONEWALLING

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INVESTIGATORS, THIS WEEK SAW

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DEVELOPMENTS REGARDING SOME OF

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ITS RANK-AND-FILE PARTICIPANTS.

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>> A CAPITOL RIOT SUSPECT ON THE

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FBI'S MOST WANTED LIST HAS

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TURNED UP NOW IN BELARUS.

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THE FUGITIVE'S NAME IS

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EVAN NEUMANN.

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HE'S FROM CALIFORNIA.

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HERE HE IS DURING AN INTERVIEW

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WITH STATE MEDIA IN BELARUS.

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NEUMANN CLAIMS HE'S INNOCENT AND

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A VICTIM OF POLITICAL

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PERSECUTION.

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>> John: OH, GREAT IDEA, EVAN!

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YOU'RE WORRIED ABOUT POLITICAL

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PERSECUTION, SO YOU GO TO

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BELARUS, A COUNTRY RUN BY A MAN

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WHO CALLS HIMSELF "THE LAST AND

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ONLY DICTATOR IN EUROPE."

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YOU CAN READ ALL ABOUT THE

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FREE-FLOWING EXCHANGE OF IDEAS

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IN ANY OF BELARUS'

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PUBLICATIONS, LIKE

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"REDACTED: MAGAZINE" AND

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"ALL PRAISE OUR GLORIOUS LEADER

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WHO ISN'T BALD QUARTERLY."

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NOW, OTHER PARTICIPANTS IN THE

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INSURRECTION HAVE BEEN FACING

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CONSEQUENCES.

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THE QANON SHAMAN -- A NAME I

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STILL CANNOT BELIEVE I HAVE TO

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SAY OUT LOUD -- IS AWAITING

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SENTENCING AFTER PLEADING

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GUILTY.

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AND THEN THERE'S JENNA RYAN, A

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TEXAS REAL ESTATE AGENT WHO

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ENTERED THE CAPITOL AND LATER

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GOT ATTENTION FOR TWEETING,

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"DEFINITELY NOT GOING TO JAIL.

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SORRY, I HAVE BLONDE HAIR,

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WHITE SKIN, A GREAT JOB, A GREAT

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FUTURE, AND I'M NOT GOING TO

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JAIL."

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WHICH IS, ON ONE HAND, A

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DANGEROUSLY BRAZEN TWEET, BUT,

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ON THE OTHER, A PRETTY GREAT

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"REAL HOUSEWIVES" CATCHPHRASE.

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"I HAVE BLONDE HAIR, WHITE SKIN,

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AND I'M NOT GOING TO JAIL."

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SHE'S THE NEW ERIKA JAYNE, AND I

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DON'T SAY THAT LIGHTLY.

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BUT TO BE FAIR, JENNA RYAN WAS

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RIGHT.

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SHE'S NOT GOING TO JAIL.

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BECAUSE SHE'S ACTUALLY GOING TO

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PRISON.

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EARLIER THIS MONTH, SHE WAS

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SENTENCED TO 60 DAYS BEHIND

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BARS, AND THIS WEEK, SHE SAT

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DOWN WITH LOCAL NEWS TO MAKE IT

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ABSOLUTELY CLEAR SHE'S LEARNED

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NOTHING FROM THIS.

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>> RYAN FLEW WITH FRIENDS ON A

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PRIVATE PLANE TO THE

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STOP THE STEAL RALLY IN DC

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BEFORE GOING BACK TO HER HOTEL.

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BUT WHILE WATCHING NEWS

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COVERAGE, SHE DECIDED TO GO BACK

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AND POSTED A VIDEO SAYING SHE

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WAS GOING TO STORM THE CAPITOL.

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>> SO I WAS JUST LIKE,

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"WE'RE STORMING THE CAPITOL!"

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AND I MEANT WE'RE STORMING WITH

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OUR WORDS, AND OUR -- WE'RE

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GOING DOWN THERE TO TELL THEM,

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YOU KNOW, AND, YOU KNOW, IT'S

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FREE SPEECH.

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YOU KNOW WHAT, WE ARE ARMED AND

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DANGEROUS!

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THIS IS THE BEGINNING!

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>> John: WHAT ARE YOU

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TALKING ABOUT, YOU

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MARJORIE TAYLOR WANNA-GREENE?

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"STORMING WITH WORDS"?

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THAT'S NOT A THING.

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THAT'S NEVER BEEN A THING.

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IF YOU LOOK UP "THING" IN THE

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DICTIONARY, I'M PRETTY SURE IT

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SAYS, "NOT STORMING WITH WORDS."

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JENNA ALSO OUTLINED HOW SHE'S

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PREPARING FOR HER 60-DAY

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SENTENCE, WHICH IS, IF NOTHING

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ELSE, ON BRAND.

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>> IT'S ALL YOU CAN THINK ABOUT.

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I'M WATCHING ALL THE YOUTUBE

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VIDEOS ON HOW PRISON IS, HOW TO

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GO TO PRISON, WHAT TO DO.

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>> John: ALL RIGHT, I DON'T KNOW

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WHAT'S WEIRDER, THAT SHE SEEMS

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SO CASUAL OR THAT AN ADULT HAS

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TO GO TO YOUTUBE TO LEARN

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"HOW PRISON IS."

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I'LL TELL YOU:

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IT'S BAD, JENNA!

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REALLY BAD.

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ALSO, THAT'S NOT WHAT YOUTUBE

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SHOULD BE FOR.

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YOUTUBE'S FOR WATCHING

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2-MINUTE MOVIE TRAILERS,

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40-MINUTE EXPLAINER VIDEOS

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POINTING OUT ALL THE EASTER EGGS

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YOU MISSED IN THAT TRAILER, AND

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TIKTOK COMPILATIONS BECAUSE

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YOU'RE TOO OLD TO LEARN TIKTOK

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BUT TOO DESPERATE TO LET IT PASS

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YOU BY COMPLETELY.

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THAT'S WHAT YOUTUBE IS FOR.

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THAT, AND OF COURSE, MELTING

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PEOPLE'S BRAINS WITH UTTER

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NONSENSE.

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SPEAKING OF WHICH, IN THE LEAST

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SURPRISING MOVE IMAGINABLE,

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JENNA RYAN LAUNCHED A PODCAST ON

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HER YOUTUBE CHANNEL THIS WEEK.

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HERE IS A CLIP FROM MONDAY'S

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FIRST EPISODE.

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>> I WANT YOU TO BE ABLE TO COME

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TO MY CHANNEL AND LISTEN TO WHAT

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I HAVE TO SAY AND BE WELL

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CAUGHT-UP ON ALTERNATIVE NEWS.

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I JUST MADE THAT UP.

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THAT'S WHAT I WANT.

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>> John: WE'RE IN HELL.

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BUT RYAN'S NOT ALONE IN NOT

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LEARNING IMPORTANT LESSONS FROM

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JANUARY 6 -- TAKE REPRESENTATIVE

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PAUL GOSAR, WHO BRAGGED THAT HE

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HELPED ORGANIZE THE VERY FIRST

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STOP THE STEAL RALLY IN ARIZONA,

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AND TWEETED VARIOUS VERSIONS OF

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STOP THE STEAL AT LEAST 25 TIMES

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IN THE RUN-UP TO THE

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INSURRECTION.

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GOSAR'S STILL VERY MUCH IN

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CONGRESS -- AND JUST THIS WEEK

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WAS CRITICIZED FOR PULLING THIS

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SHIT.

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>> A U.S. CONGRESSMAN IS UNDER

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FIRE TODAY FOR POSTING A VIDEO

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WHICH SIMULATES HIM KILLING ONE

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OF HIS COLLEAGUES.

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REPUBLICAN PAUL GOSAR FROM

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ARIZONA SHARED THE CLIP ON

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SOCIAL MEDIA, WHICH WAS ALTERED

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FROM A POPULAR ANIME SERIES.

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IN IT, A CARTOON FIGURE WITH HIS

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FACE ATTACKS A FIGURE WITH THE

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FACE OF DEMOCRATIC CONGRESSWOMAN

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ALEXANDRIA OCASIO-CORTEZ.

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IT ALSO APPEARS TO GO AFTER

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PRESIDENT BIDEN WITH SWORDS.

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>> John: OKAY, THERE IS CLEARLY

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A LOT GOING ON THERE.

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BUT JUST IN TERMS OF SHEER

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WEIRDNESS, I'M NOT SURE I

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CAN GET OVER THE IDEA THAT

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PAUL GOSAR -- THIS GUY -- IS IN

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ANY WAY FAMILIAR WITH ANIME.

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WHEN I SEE PAUL GOSAR,

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I THINK OF A FEW THINGS.

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I THINK ASSHOLE, TROLL,

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PLUCKED SAM THE EAGLE,

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GUY WHO LOOKS LIKE HE

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OCCASIONALLY GOOGLES "WHY AREN'T

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THERE MORE BREAKFAST SOUPS?"

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BUT ANIME FAN?

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THIS GUY?

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SHAME ON ME FOR JUDGING A BOOK

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BY ITS COVER.

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PLEASE CARRY ON AND ENJOY

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"NEON GENESIS EVANGELION,"

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SUBS NOT DUBS TILL THE DAY THEY

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PUT YOU IN THE GROUND.

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BUT, LOOK, INSTEAD OF

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APOLOGIZING, GOSAR DOUBLED DOWN,

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TWEETING THIS MEME IN RESPONSE

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SAYING, "IT'S A CARTOON, RELAX."

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AND LOOK, IT IS.

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KIND OF.

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BECAUSE ON ONE HAND, IT'D BE

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DISINGENUOUS OF ME TO PRETEND

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THAT GOSAR TWEETING A POORLY

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EDITED ANIME VIDEO MEANT HE WAS

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GOING TO PHYSICALLY ATTACK AOC.

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I DON'T THINK HE'S GOING TO DO

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THAT, NOT LEAST BECAUSE IF HE

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DID, HE'D LOSE.

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BUT ALSO, JUST BECAUSE SOMETHING

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ISN'T A LITERAL THREAT DOESN'T

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MEAN IT CAN'T STILL INSPIRE

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REAL WORLD HARM.

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BECAUSE IF WE'VE LEARNED

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ANYTHING FROM JANUARY 6TH, AND

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IT SEEMS WE HAVE NOT LEARNED

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NEARLY ENOUGH, IT'S THAT IT'S

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VERY EASY FOR A JOKE TO BECOME

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REALITY, AND THAT A TROUBLING

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NUMBER OF PEOPLE DON'T SEEM TO

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UNDERSTAND THE DIFFERENCE

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BETWEEN "STORMING THE CAPITOL"

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METAPHORICALLY AND PHYSICALLY.

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AND KNOWING FULL WELL THAT THIS

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VIDEO MIGHT NOW SHOW UP IF

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JENNA RYAN SEARCHES YOUTUBE FOR

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"WHAT TO DO IN PRISON AFTER

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CAPITOL RIOTS," ALLOW ME TO TAKE

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THIS OPPORTUNITY TO ADDRESS HER

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DIRECTLY.

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JENNA.

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FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART,

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THANKS FOR WATCHING, SMASH THAT

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LIKE BUTTON, HIT SUBSCRIBE,

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SOUND OFF IN THE COMMENTS WITH

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WHAT YOU WANT BIG SWINGIN' JOHN

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TO TALK ABOUT IN A FUTURE VIDEO,

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THE FUN CONTINUES IN MY

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INSTAGRAM STORIES, SO CHECK THAT

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OUT AND, AS ALWAYS, NEW MERCH IN

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THE DESCRIPTION.

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NAMASTE.

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AND NOW THIS.

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>> Announcer: AND NOW,

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THE MANY QUESTIONS OF

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"FOX AND FRIENDS"

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BRIAN KILMEADE.

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>> HOW DO DINERS HAVE 20 PAGES

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IN THEIR MENU?

258
00:07:02,043 --> 00:07:03,309
THEY COULD MAKE ANYTHING.

259
00:07:03,376 --> 00:07:04,143
HOW DO THEY DO THAT?

260
00:07:04,209 --> 00:07:04,743
WHY DO ALL NEWBORNS HAVE THAT

261
00:07:04,809 --> 00:07:05,976
SAME BLANKET?

262
00:07:06,043 --> 00:07:07,009
WHAT GREAT AMERICAN DECIDED THAT

263
00:07:07,076 --> 00:07:07,976
YOU NEEDED A BUN WITH A HOT DOG,

264
00:07:08,043 --> 00:07:12,276
DO YOU KNOW?

265
00:07:12,343 --> 00:07:13,009
WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN

266
00:07:13,076 --> 00:07:13,509
SOULCYCLE AND SPINNING?

267
00:07:13,576 --> 00:07:14,743
DO YOU KNOW?

268
00:07:14,809 --> 00:07:16,109
WHAT DO BEARS EAT?

269
00:07:16,176 --> 00:07:17,376
IS IT SQUIRRELS?

270
00:07:17,443 --> 00:07:18,276
DO YOU THINK SHARKS KNOW IT IS

271
00:07:18,343 --> 00:07:21,676
SHARK WEEK?

272
00:07:21,743 --> 00:07:22,609
WHAT PART OF THE COW IS THE

273
00:07:22,676 --> 00:07:22,809
SKIRT?

274
00:07:22,876 --> 00:07:23,343
IT MAKES YOU QUESTION

275
00:07:23,409 --> 00:07:24,676
EVERYTHING, LIKE, WHY WAS IT

276
00:07:24,743 --> 00:07:25,309
EVER THE INTERNATIONAL HOUSE OF

277
00:07:25,376 --> 00:07:27,076
PANCAKES?

278
00:07:27,143 --> 00:07:28,676
WHAT IF A TREE COULD JUST HOVER?

279
00:07:28,743 --> 00:07:32,009
IS SPAM MEAT?

280
00:07:32,076 --> 00:07:33,276
WHAT'S THIS CALLED?

281
00:07:33,343 --> 00:07:33,909
WHY ARE TURNIPS SO ARE SEASONAL.

282
00:07:33,976 --> 00:07:34,976
TURNIPS.

283
00:07:35,043 --> 00:07:35,943
DO YOU HAVE TURNIPS MORE THAN

284
00:07:36,009 --> 00:07:36,576
ONCE A YEAR?

285
00:07:36,643 --> 00:07:37,109
WHY DON'T WE HAVE TURNIPS

286
00:07:37,176 --> 00:07:38,309
YEAR-ROUND?

287
00:07:38,376 --> 00:07:38,976
>> WE DO.

288
00:07:39,043 --> 00:07:42,343
>> YOU DO?

289
00:07:42,409 --> 00:07:43,376
>> SURE.

290
00:07:43,443 --> 00:07:44,476
>> John: MOVING ON.

291
00:07:44,543 --> 00:07:45,443
OUR MAIN STORY TONIGHT CONCERNS

292
00:07:45,509 --> 00:07:46,476
UNIONS.

293
00:07:46,543 --> 00:07:47,609
THE INSTITUTIONS THAT BROUGHT US

294
00:07:47,676 --> 00:07:48,843
THE WEEKEND, THE MIDDLE CLASS,

295
00:07:48,909 --> 00:07:49,543
AND -- IN THE CASE OF THE

296
00:07:49,609 --> 00:07:50,276
INTERNATIONAL LADIES GARMENT

297
00:07:50,343 --> 00:07:51,276
WORKERS UNION -- AN ABSOLUTE

298
00:07:51,343 --> 00:07:53,376
BANGER OF A SONG.

299
00:07:53,443 --> 00:08:01,976
AND BEFORE WE PLAY THIS, I HAVE

300
00:08:02,043 --> 00:08:02,943
A FAVORITE SINGER HERE, SEE IF

301
00:08:03,009 --> 00:08:06,876
THEY'RE YOURS TOO.

302
00:08:06,943 --> 00:08:08,076
>> ♪ LOOK FOR THE UNION LABEL ♪

303
00:08:08,143 --> 00:08:09,709
♪ WHEN YOU ARE BUYING THAT COAT,

304
00:08:09,776 --> 00:08:10,143
DRESS, OR BLOUSE ♪

305
00:08:10,209 --> 00:08:13,143
♪ REMEMBER SOMEWHERE OUR UNION'S

306
00:08:13,209 --> 00:08:13,976
SEWING ♪

307
00:08:14,043 --> 00:08:16,543
♪ OUR WAGES GOING TO FEED THE

308
00:08:16,609 --> 00:08:22,743
KIDS ♪

309
00:08:22,809 --> 00:08:29,943
>> ♪ AND RUN THE HOUSE ♪

310
00:08:30,009 --> 00:08:31,576
♪ >> ♪ WE WORK HARD, BUT WHO'S

311
00:08:31,643 --> 00:08:32,309
COMPLAINING?

312
00:08:32,376 --> 00:08:34,176
♪ THANKS TO THE ILG, WE'RE

313
00:08:34,243 --> 00:08:34,876
PAYING OUR WAY

314
00:08:34,943 --> 00:08:35,876
♪ SO ALWAYS LOOK FOR THE UNION

315
00:08:35,943 --> 00:08:36,376
LABEL

316
00:08:36,443 --> 00:08:38,776
♪ IT SAYS WE'RE ABLE TO MAKE IT

317
00:08:38,843 --> 00:08:39,476
IN THE USA! ♪

318
00:08:39,543 --> 00:08:40,709
>> John: THEY LOOK SO HAPPY!

319
00:08:40,776 --> 00:08:41,576
IT'S A VIDEO SO UPLIFTING, YOU

320
00:08:41,643 --> 00:08:42,209
BARELY PAUSE TO WONDER HOW MANY

321
00:08:42,276 --> 00:08:42,876
OF THEM ARE DEAD NOW.

322
00:08:42,943 --> 00:08:43,543
AND BY THE WAY, YES,

323
00:08:43,609 --> 00:08:44,576
MY FAVORITE SINGER IS THE

324
00:08:44,643 --> 00:08:45,809
"AND RUN THE HOUSE" LADY.

325
00:08:45,876 --> 00:08:48,909
SHE'S THE ONLY ONE WHO GETS TO

326
00:08:48,976 --> 00:08:49,709
HAVE A DRAMATIC ENTRANCE.

327
00:08:49,776 --> 00:08:50,743
ALSO, SHE'S GOT A FABULOUS

328
00:08:50,809 --> 00:08:51,709
MUSHROOM HAIRCUT, WIDE LAPELS,

329
00:08:51,776 --> 00:08:56,509
AND THE VOICE OF AN ANGEL.

330
00:08:56,576 --> 00:08:58,843
EVERY SINGER IN THAT SONG IS A

331
00:08:58,909 --> 00:09:00,476
STAR, BUT SHE IS THE BRIGHTEST

332
00:09:00,543 --> 00:09:00,809
IN THE GALAXY.

333
00:09:00,876 --> 00:09:01,376
NOW, THAT AD, IF IT WEREN'T

334
00:09:01,443 --> 00:09:02,209
OBVIOUS FROM EVERY SINGLE THING

335
00:09:02,276 --> 00:09:03,276
ABOUT IT, IS FROM THE EARLY

336
00:09:03,343 --> 00:09:04,343
1980s, AND UNFORTUNATELY, SINCE

337
00:09:04,409 --> 00:09:05,809
THEN, UNION MEMBERSHIP HAS

338
00:09:05,876 --> 00:09:07,943
DECLINED CONSIDERABLY.

339
00:09:08,009 --> 00:09:10,043
TODAY, JUST OVER 10% OF AMERICAN

340
00:09:10,109 --> 00:09:12,176
WORKERS BELONG TO A UNION.

341
00:09:12,243 --> 00:09:13,709
THAT'S JUST HALF THE RATE IT WAS

342
00:09:13,776 --> 00:09:14,909
IN 1983, MEANING WE'RE CURRENTLY

343
00:09:14,976 --> 00:09:16,776
LIVING IN ONE OF THE WORST TIMES

344
00:09:16,843 --> 00:09:18,109
FOR ORGANIZED LABOR IN OUR

345
00:09:18,176 --> 00:09:19,743
COUNTRY'S HISTORY.

346
00:09:19,809 --> 00:09:21,243
AND IT'S NOT LIKE THE DEMAND

347
00:09:21,309 --> 00:09:22,143
ISN'T THERE:

348
00:09:22,209 --> 00:09:24,076
NEARLY HALF OF NON-UNION WORKERS

349
00:09:24,143 --> 00:09:25,676
SAY THEY'D LIKE TO BE IN A

350
00:09:25,743 --> 00:09:26,943
UNION.

351
00:09:27,009 --> 00:09:28,676
AND A LOT OF WORKPLACES DO SEEM

352
00:09:28,743 --> 00:09:29,643
LIKE A NATURAL FIT FOR ONE.

353
00:09:29,709 --> 00:09:30,876
TAKE AMAZON.

354
00:09:30,943 --> 00:09:32,709
YOU'VE LIKELY HEARD THE INFAMOUS

355
00:09:32,776 --> 00:09:33,509
STORIES OF DRIVERS FOR THE

356
00:09:33,576 --> 00:09:34,743
COMPANY BEING FORCED TO PEE

357
00:09:34,809 --> 00:09:36,176
IN BOTTLES IN ORDER TO MAKE

358
00:09:36,243 --> 00:09:37,543
QUOTAS -- STORIES THAT AMAZON

359
00:09:37,609 --> 00:09:39,043
INITIALLY DENIED, THEN

360
00:09:39,109 --> 00:09:40,609
APOLOGIZED FOR DENYING, FINALLY

361
00:09:40,676 --> 00:09:41,576
ADMITTING THAT, YEAH, OKAY,

362
00:09:41,643 --> 00:09:43,143
THEIR DRIVERS DO SOMETIMES HAVE

363
00:09:43,209 --> 00:09:44,709
TO PISS IN BOTTLES.

364
00:09:44,776 --> 00:09:47,743
IT'S LIKE THE OLD ADAGE:

365
00:09:47,809 --> 00:09:49,009
"'TIS BETTER TO SEEK FORGIVENESS

366
00:09:49,076 --> 00:09:49,643
THAN PERMISSION, UNLESS THIS IS

367
00:09:49,709 --> 00:09:50,643
ABOUT PISS BOTTLES, IN WHICH

368
00:09:50,709 --> 00:09:51,543
CASE, TAKE A LOOK AT YOURSELF,

369
00:09:51,609 --> 00:09:52,943
MAN, WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING."

370
00:09:53,009 --> 00:09:55,409
MAHATMA GANDHI.

371
00:09:55,476 --> 00:09:57,143
AND YET, DESPITE THAT AND OTHER

372
00:09:57,209 --> 00:09:58,209
REPORTS OF ABYSMAL WORKING

373
00:09:58,276 --> 00:10:00,076
CONDITIONS, EARLIER THIS YEAR AN

374
00:10:00,143 --> 00:10:01,109
ORGANIZING DRIVE FOR AMAZON

375
00:10:01,176 --> 00:10:02,476
WAREHOUSE WORKERS IN BESSEMER,

376
00:10:02,543 --> 00:10:04,209
ALABAMA, WAS VOTED DOWN BY MORE

377
00:10:04,276 --> 00:10:05,776
THAN TWO TO ONE.

378
00:10:05,843 --> 00:10:07,376
WHICH MAY SEEM LIKE A CLEAR-CUT

379
00:10:07,443 --> 00:10:09,309
CASE OF WORKERS DECIDING FOR

380
00:10:09,376 --> 00:10:12,276
THEMSELVES TO REJECT A UNION,

381
00:10:12,343 --> 00:10:14,276
BUT IT'S A LOT MORE COMPLICATED

382
00:10:14,343 --> 00:10:15,576
THAN THAT, BECAUSE IF YOU'VE

383
00:10:15,643 --> 00:10:16,776
NEVER BEEN THROUGH A

384
00:10:16,843 --> 00:10:18,776
UNION-ORGANIZING DRIVE YOURSELF,

385
00:10:18,843 --> 00:10:19,843
YOU MIGHT ASSUME A UNION VOTE IS

386
00:10:19,909 --> 00:10:21,109
A COMPLETELY FREE AND FAIR

387
00:10:21,176 --> 00:10:22,509
ELECTION.

388
00:10:22,576 --> 00:10:23,676
THAT'S AN ILLUSION FED BY

389
00:10:23,743 --> 00:10:24,943
EXECUTIVES LIKE JEFF BEZOS,

390
00:10:25,009 --> 00:10:26,743
AMERICA'S LEAST-INSPIRING

391
00:10:26,809 --> 00:10:28,543
ASTRONAUT, THROUGH STATEMENTS

392
00:10:28,609 --> 00:10:30,143
LIKE THIS.

393
00:10:30,209 --> 00:10:31,709
>> WE DON'T BELIEVE THAT WE NEED

394
00:10:31,776 --> 00:10:33,976
A UNION TO BE AN INTERMEDIARY

395
00:10:34,076 --> 00:10:36,709
BETWEEN US AND OUR EMPLOYEES

396
00:10:36,776 --> 00:10:37,476
BUT, OF COURSE, AT THE END OF

397
00:10:37,543 --> 00:10:38,176
THE DAY, IT'S ALWAYS THE

398
00:10:38,243 --> 00:10:41,609
EMPLOYEES' CHOICE.

399
00:10:41,676 --> 00:10:42,443
AND -- AND THAT'S HOW IT

400
00:10:42,509 --> 00:10:43,009
SHOULD BE.

401
00:10:43,076 --> 00:10:44,876
>> John: I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU,

402
00:10:44,943 --> 00:10:45,843
BUT I'M PERSONALLY NOT COMFORTED

403
00:10:45,909 --> 00:10:46,443
BY HEARING ONE OF THE RICHEST

404
00:10:46,509 --> 00:10:48,143
MEN ON EARTH SAY "IT'S YOUR

405
00:10:48,209 --> 00:10:48,809
CHOICE."

406
00:10:48,876 --> 00:10:49,909
NO MATTER THE CONTEXT, ALL I CAN

407
00:10:49,976 --> 00:10:51,709
HEAR IS "SPEAR OR ARROW -- HOW

408
00:10:51,776 --> 00:10:53,609
WOULD YOU PREFER TO BE HUNTED?

409
00:10:53,676 --> 00:10:56,909
IT'S YOUR CHOICE."

410
00:10:56,976 --> 00:10:58,109
BUT IT IS WORTH KNOWING JUST HOW

411
00:10:58,176 --> 00:10:58,843
MANY WAYS AMAZON AND MANY

412
00:10:58,909 --> 00:10:59,509
OTHER COMPANIES TRY TO

413
00:10:59,576 --> 00:11:01,376
INFLUENCE THEIR EMPLOYEES'

414
00:11:01,443 --> 00:11:02,676
CHOICE.

415
00:11:02,743 --> 00:11:03,609
BECAUSE THEY CAN EXERT A HUGE

416
00:11:03,676 --> 00:11:05,343
AMOUNT OF PRESSURE.

417
00:11:05,409 --> 00:11:06,809
SO TONIGHT, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT

418
00:11:06,876 --> 00:11:08,209
UNION-BUSTING -- WHAT IT IS,

419
00:11:08,276 --> 00:11:09,843
HOW IT WORKS, AND HOW FEW

420
00:11:09,909 --> 00:11:11,343
CONSEQUENCES COMPANIES FACE FOR

421
00:11:11,409 --> 00:11:12,343
DOING IT.

422
00:11:12,409 --> 00:11:13,809
AND LET'S START WITH A VERY

423
00:11:13,876 --> 00:11:15,009
BASIC BREAKDOWN OF HOW A UNION

424
00:11:15,076 --> 00:11:16,509
DRIVE WORKS.

425
00:11:16,576 --> 00:11:18,309
THE FIRST THING TO KNOW IS THAT

426
00:11:18,376 --> 00:11:19,743
ANY EMPLOYER MAY RECOGNIZE A

427
00:11:19,809 --> 00:11:21,876
UNION BASED SOLELY ON MAJORITY

428
00:11:21,943 --> 00:11:23,643
SUPPORT.

429
00:11:23,709 --> 00:11:24,776
SO THEY CAN LET EMPLOYEES

430
00:11:24,843 --> 00:11:26,309
UNIONIZE IMMEDIATELY, BUT

431
00:11:26,376 --> 00:11:28,809
THEY'RE NOT REQUIRED TO DO THAT,

432
00:11:28,876 --> 00:11:30,143
UNLESS IT'S BEEN CHOSEN THROUGH

433
00:11:30,209 --> 00:11:31,443
A SECRET BALLOT VOTE.

434
00:11:31,509 --> 00:11:33,409
SO UNSURPRISINGLY, THAT'S HOW

435
00:11:33,476 --> 00:11:34,843
MOST UNIONS END UP GETTING

436
00:11:34,909 --> 00:11:36,176
RECOGNIZED.

437
00:11:36,243 --> 00:11:37,443
AND THE FIRST KEY STEP IN

438
00:11:37,509 --> 00:11:38,843
UNION-BUSTING IS PREVENTING

439
00:11:38,909 --> 00:11:41,343
THINGS FROM EVER REACHING THAT

440
00:11:41,409 --> 00:11:43,176
POINT.

441
00:11:43,243 --> 00:11:44,243
BECAUSE FOR AN ELECTION TO

442
00:11:44,309 --> 00:11:45,443
HAPPEN AT ALL, 30% OF WORKERS

443
00:11:45,509 --> 00:11:46,409
MUST SIGN A UNION CARD,

444
00:11:46,476 --> 00:11:47,843
EXPRESSING AN INITIAL INTEREST

445
00:11:47,909 --> 00:11:49,443
IN UNION REPRESENTATION.

446
00:11:49,509 --> 00:11:50,676
BUT AMAZON, FOR INSTANCE, HAS

447
00:11:50,743 --> 00:11:52,276
INSTRUCTED ITS MANAGERS TO BE ON

448
00:11:52,343 --> 00:11:54,509
HIGH ALERT FOR THE SLIGHTEST

449
00:11:54,576 --> 00:11:55,776
SIGN THAT THAT MIGHT HAPPEN --

450
00:11:55,843 --> 00:11:57,143
AS THIS LEAKED INTERNAL VIDEO

451
00:11:57,209 --> 00:11:59,143
SHOWS:

452
00:11:59,209 --> 00:12:00,976
>> IF YOU SEE WARNING SIGNS OF

453
00:12:01,043 --> 00:12:02,409
POTENTIAL ORGANIZING, NOTIFY

454
00:12:02,476 --> 00:12:03,343
YOUR BUILDING HRM AND GM SITE

455
00:12:03,409 --> 00:12:04,743
LEADER IMMEDIATELY.

456
00:12:04,809 --> 00:12:06,676
THE MOST OBVIOUS SIGNS WOULD

457
00:12:06,743 --> 00:12:09,843
INCLUDE USE OF WORDS ASSOCIATED

458
00:12:09,909 --> 00:12:10,743
WITH UNIONS OR UNION-LED

459
00:12:10,809 --> 00:12:11,709
MOVEMENTS LIKE "LIVING WAGE" OR

460
00:12:11,776 --> 00:12:12,743
"STEWARD."

461
00:12:12,809 --> 00:12:15,076
>> John: WOW.

462
00:12:15,143 --> 00:12:17,343
SET ASIDE HOW COMPLETELY

463
00:12:17,409 --> 00:12:18,743
MASK-OFF IT IS TO TREAT THE

464
00:12:18,809 --> 00:12:20,643
PHRASE "LIVING WAGE" LIKE THE

465
00:12:20,709 --> 00:12:22,576
FIRST WARNING SIGN OF A STROKE,

466
00:12:22,643 --> 00:12:24,476
YOU'D ALSO THINK A NEARLY

467
00:12:24,543 --> 00:12:25,476
$2 TRILLION COMPANY LIKE AMAZON

468
00:12:25,543 --> 00:12:26,676
COULD SPRING FOR BETTER

469
00:12:26,743 --> 00:12:29,176
ANIMATION THAN JIBJAB.

470
00:12:29,243 --> 00:12:30,476
BUT IF ENOUGH WORKERS DO SIGN

471
00:12:30,543 --> 00:12:31,409
CARDS, THE ELECTION PROCESS IS

472
00:12:31,476 --> 00:12:32,776
THEN UNDERWAY.

473
00:12:32,843 --> 00:12:34,643
AND IN THAT PROCESS, COMPANIES

474
00:12:34,709 --> 00:12:37,409
HAVE SOME PRETTY HUGE

475
00:12:37,476 --> 00:12:38,309
ADVANTAGES.

476
00:12:38,376 --> 00:12:39,276
BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY, WHEN YOU'RE

477
00:12:39,343 --> 00:12:40,309
ON THEIR PREMISES, THEY HAVE

478
00:12:40,376 --> 00:12:41,243
UNFETTERED ACCESS TO YOU, WHILE

479
00:12:41,309 --> 00:12:42,076
ALSO HAVING THE ABILITY TO KEEP

480
00:12:42,143 --> 00:12:45,043
UNION REPS OUT.

481
00:12:45,109 --> 00:12:46,076
AND MANY COMPANIES TAKE FULL

482
00:12:46,143 --> 00:12:48,443
ADVANTAGE OF THAT ACCESS.

483
00:12:48,509 --> 00:12:49,476
AMAZON, FOR INSTANCE, INUNDATED

484
00:12:49,543 --> 00:12:51,143
WORKERS WITH ANTI-UNION SIGNS

485
00:12:51,209 --> 00:12:53,076
ALL OVER THEIR WORKPLACE -- EVEN

486
00:12:53,143 --> 00:12:54,676
PUTTING THEM INSIDE BATHROOM

487
00:12:54,743 --> 00:12:56,676
STALLS.

488
00:12:56,743 --> 00:12:57,709
THEY ALSO USED WORKERS' CONTACT

489
00:12:57,776 --> 00:12:59,009
INFO TO SEND MULTIPLE ANTI-UNION

490
00:12:59,076 --> 00:13:02,343
TEXT MESSAGES TO THEM PER DAY.

491
00:13:02,409 --> 00:13:03,609
AND HELD MANDATORY MEETINGS THAT

492
00:13:03,676 --> 00:13:06,176
SEEMED DESIGNED TO SPREAD FEAR.

493
00:13:06,243 --> 00:13:07,576
>> THEY HAD SOMEBODY WHO WAS

494
00:13:07,643 --> 00:13:09,176
LIKE THEIR -- THE CAPTAIN OF THE

495
00:13:09,243 --> 00:13:10,843
UNION BUSTING WHO WOULD COME

496
00:13:10,909 --> 00:13:12,076
DOWN AND TEACH, LIKE --

497
00:13:12,143 --> 00:13:13,209
>> WHAT WAS THE OFFICIAL TITLE

498
00:13:13,276 --> 00:13:15,909
OF THE CLASS?

499
00:13:15,976 --> 00:13:16,509
>> THEY JUST CALLED IT, LIKE,

500
00:13:16,576 --> 00:13:17,109
UNION TRAINING.

501
00:13:17,176 --> 00:13:17,876
THAT'S IT.

502
00:13:17,943 --> 00:13:18,776
WHICH IS FUNNY BECAUSE IT'S NOT

503
00:13:18,843 --> 00:13:20,843
UNION TRAINING.

504
00:13:20,909 --> 00:13:21,676
IT'S ANTI -- IT'S

505
00:13:21,743 --> 00:13:27,543
UNION-BUSTING 101.

506
00:13:27,609 --> 00:13:28,043
>> John: RIGHT.

507
00:13:28,109 --> 00:13:28,776
IT'S NOT "UNION TRAINING" IF THE

508
00:13:28,843 --> 00:13:29,543
EXPLICIT GOAL IS TO KILL THE

509
00:13:29,609 --> 00:13:30,076
UNION.

510
00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:30,976
IT WOULD BE LIKE TAKING

511
00:13:31,043 --> 00:13:31,609
A DOG TRAINING CLASS FROM

512
00:13:31,676 --> 00:13:32,376
CRUELLA DE VIL.

513
00:13:32,443 --> 00:13:33,976
ALTHOUGH, NO, NOT THE ONE THAT'S

514
00:13:34,043 --> 00:13:34,809
A MISUNDERSTOOD BOHEMIAN OR

515
00:13:34,876 --> 00:13:35,876
WHATEVER, I'M TALKING ABOUT THE

516
00:13:35,943 --> 00:13:37,109
REAL CRUELLA.

517
00:13:37,176 --> 00:13:38,343
YEAH, THAT ONE.

518
00:13:38,409 --> 00:13:39,509
THE ORIGINAL DOGICIDAL

519
00:13:39,576 --> 00:13:42,009
BAD BITCH.

520
00:13:42,076 --> 00:13:43,543
THESE MANDATORY PROPAGANDA

521
00:13:43,609 --> 00:13:44,743
SESSIONS ARE CALLED

522
00:13:44,809 --> 00:13:47,109
"CAPTIVE AUDIENCE MEETINGS," AND

523
00:13:47,176 --> 00:13:48,509
MOST AMAZON WORKERS AT BESSEMER

524
00:13:48,576 --> 00:13:50,809
WERE HAVING TO ATTEND AT LEAST

525
00:13:50,876 --> 00:13:51,743
TWO PER WEEK.

526
00:13:51,809 --> 00:13:53,709
AND THAT'S NOT UNCOMMON --

527
00:13:53,776 --> 00:13:54,809
NEARLY 90% OF EMPLOYERS FACING

528
00:13:54,876 --> 00:13:57,143
UNION CAMPAIGNS HOLD CAPTIVE

529
00:13:57,209 --> 00:13:58,676
AUDIENCE MEETINGS.

530
00:13:58,743 --> 00:14:00,076
RIGHT NOW, STARBUCKS IS FACING A

531
00:14:00,143 --> 00:14:01,776
UNION DRIVE AT SIX OF ITS STORES

532
00:14:01,843 --> 00:14:04,709
IN BUFFALO, AND IT'S BEEN DOING

533
00:14:04,776 --> 00:14:05,376
EVERYTHING YOU'VE JUST SEEN --

534
00:14:05,443 --> 00:14:06,209
SENDING ANTI-UNION TEXT

535
00:14:06,276 --> 00:14:07,176
MESSAGES, PUTTING UP SIGNS, AND

536
00:14:07,243 --> 00:14:08,109
HOLDING CAPTIVE AUDIENCE

537
00:14:08,176 --> 00:14:09,676
MEETINGS.

538
00:14:09,743 --> 00:14:11,709
AND IT MAY BE NO COINCIDENCE

539
00:14:11,776 --> 00:14:12,809
THAT AMAZON'S AND STARBUCKS'

540
00:14:12,876 --> 00:14:14,743
TACTICS ARE PRETTY SIMILAR,

541
00:14:14,809 --> 00:14:16,109
BECAUSE BOTH HIRED UNION-BUSTING

542
00:14:16,176 --> 00:14:17,409
LAW FIRMS AND CONSULTANTS TO

543
00:14:17,476 --> 00:14:24,843
HELP THEM WITH THEIR CAMPAIGNS.

544
00:14:24,909 --> 00:14:27,176
WHICH IS NOT UNUSUAL.

545
00:14:27,243 --> 00:14:27,676
UNION-BUSTING IS A WHOLE

546
00:14:27,743 --> 00:14:27,976
INDUSTRY.

547
00:14:28,076 --> 00:14:28,809
THERE ARE NOW ABOUT 2,000 OF

548
00:14:28,876 --> 00:14:30,509
THESE FIRMS, SOME OF WHICH HAVE

549
00:14:30,576 --> 00:14:30,976
EUPHEMISTIC NAMES LIKE

550
00:14:31,043 --> 00:14:32,476
"THE LABOR RELATIONS INSTITUTE."

551
00:14:32,543 --> 00:14:34,776
AND 75% OF COMPANIES FACING

552
00:14:34,843 --> 00:14:35,843
ORGANIZING DRIVES HIRE ONE,

553
00:14:35,909 --> 00:14:37,943
SPENDING NEARLY $340 MILLION ON

554
00:14:38,009 --> 00:14:39,309
THEM PER YEAR.

555
00:14:39,376 --> 00:14:40,743
AND THESE FIRMS OFFER DIFFERENT

556
00:14:40,809 --> 00:14:41,943
LEVELS OF SERVICES.

557
00:14:42,009 --> 00:14:43,143
FOR COMPANIES ON A BUDGET, SOME

558
00:14:43,209 --> 00:14:44,609
OFFER MASS-PRODUCED ANTI-UNION

559
00:14:44,676 --> 00:14:45,509
VIDEOS.

560
00:14:45,576 --> 00:14:46,876
YOU CAN EVEN BUY THIS ONE,

561
00:14:46,943 --> 00:14:49,043
FEATURING A CARTOONISHLY

562
00:14:49,109 --> 00:14:50,809
OVERBEARING UNION ORGANIZER,

563
00:14:50,876 --> 00:14:52,176
SHOT AGAINST A GREEN SCREEN, SO

564
00:14:52,243 --> 00:14:53,076
YOU CAN CUSTOMIZE IT BASED ON

565
00:14:53,143 --> 00:14:54,843
YOUR WORKPLACE.

566
00:14:54,909 --> 00:14:56,409
THEY EVEN PRODUCED SAMPLES OF

567
00:14:56,476 --> 00:14:57,809
WHAT THAT COULD LOOK LIKE:

568
00:14:57,876 --> 00:14:58,976
>> LISTEN, JUST SIGN THE CARD.

569
00:14:59,043 --> 00:15:00,043
ONCE A UNION GETS HERE, YOU

570
00:15:00,109 --> 00:15:03,143
WANNA BE ON THE GOOD SIDE.

571
00:15:03,209 --> 00:15:04,776
LISTEN, JUST SIGN THE CARD.

572
00:15:04,843 --> 00:15:05,576
ONCE A UNION GETS HERE, YOU

573
00:15:05,643 --> 00:15:08,476
WANNA BE ON THE GOOD SIDE.

574
00:15:08,543 --> 00:15:12,176
LISTEN, JUST SIGN THE CARD.

575
00:15:12,243 --> 00:15:13,009
ONCE A UNION GETS HERE, YOU

576
00:15:13,076 --> 00:15:13,676
WANNA BE ON THE GOOD SIDE.

577
00:15:13,743 --> 00:15:14,609
>> John: WELL, I'LL SAY THIS:

578
00:15:14,676 --> 00:15:15,743
AT LEAST THEY CHOSE OUTFITS

579
00:15:15,809 --> 00:15:17,243
THAT'D FIT IN ANY WORKPLACE,

580
00:15:17,309 --> 00:15:18,709
BECAUSE WE ALL KNOW EMPLOYEES IN

581
00:15:18,776 --> 00:15:19,843
BOTH CORPORATE OFFICES AND

582
00:15:19,909 --> 00:15:21,676
WAREHOUSES DRESS LIKE

583
00:15:21,743 --> 00:15:22,476
A COLLEGE FOOTBALL COACH

584
00:15:22,543 --> 00:15:23,676
WHOSE WIFE JUST LEFT HIM

585
00:15:23,743 --> 00:15:24,709
AND AN "AMERICA'S

586
00:15:24,776 --> 00:15:25,909
NEXT TOP MODEL" CONTESTANT

587
00:15:25,976 --> 00:15:27,776
BEFORE THE MAKEOVER.

588
00:15:27,843 --> 00:15:29,309
ALTHOUGH THE BACKDROPS CLEARLY

589
00:15:29,376 --> 00:15:30,576
COULD HAVE BEEN MORE CREATIVE.

590
00:15:30,643 --> 00:15:31,976
YOU'VE GOT A GREEN SCREEN.

591
00:15:32,043 --> 00:15:35,509
THE WORLD'S YOUR OYSTER.

592
00:15:35,576 --> 00:15:36,909
WHY NOT SHOW EVIL UNIONIZERS

593
00:15:36,976 --> 00:15:38,543
MOBILIZING ON A ROLLER COASTER

594
00:15:38,609 --> 00:15:41,109
OR ON A TROPICAL GETAWAY OR ON

595
00:15:41,176 --> 00:15:43,976
THE DESERT PLANET OF ARRAKIS?

596
00:15:44,043 --> 00:15:45,276
IF YOU'RE GOING TO FORCE

597
00:15:45,343 --> 00:15:46,009
EMPLOYEES TO WATCH YOUR

598
00:15:46,076 --> 00:15:47,109
BULLSHIT, AT LEAST TAKE THEM

599
00:15:47,176 --> 00:15:48,609
ON A COSMIC JOURNEY WITH

600
00:15:48,676 --> 00:15:51,676
SANDY SOFTBOY SPACE JESUS.

601
00:15:51,743 --> 00:15:53,009
BUT WHETHER IT'S COMING DIRECTLY

602
00:15:53,076 --> 00:15:54,843
FROM A COMPANY OR THROUGH AN

603
00:15:54,909 --> 00:15:57,576
OUTSIDE FIRM, ANTI-UNION

604
00:15:57,643 --> 00:15:59,043
CAMPAIGNS TEND TO FOLLOW A

605
00:15:59,109 --> 00:16:00,343
PRETTY BASIC PLAYBOOK, AND A

606
00:16:00,409 --> 00:16:02,043
GO-TO TACTIC IS TO HIGHLIGHT

607
00:16:02,109 --> 00:16:03,476
THAT UNIONS COLLECT DUES.

608
00:16:03,543 --> 00:16:05,443
IT'S A POINT DELTA AIRLINES

609
00:16:05,509 --> 00:16:10,143
MADE WHEN ITS EMPLOYEES WERE

610
00:16:10,209 --> 00:16:12,909
CONSIDERING UNIONIZING, AND THEY

611
00:16:12,976 --> 00:16:13,576
DID IT IN A

612
00:16:13,643 --> 00:16:14,176
PRETTY DICKISH WAY.

613
00:16:14,243 --> 00:16:14,976
>> DELTA AIRLINES CAUSING A LOT

614
00:16:15,043 --> 00:16:15,709
OF TURBULENCE ON THE GROUND

615
00:16:15,776 --> 00:16:16,343
AFTER IT TOLD EMPLOYEES TO BUY

616
00:16:16,409 --> 00:16:16,943
VIDEO GAMES INSTEAD OF

617
00:16:17,009 --> 00:16:17,876
UNIONIZING.

618
00:16:17,943 --> 00:16:19,309
ONE POSTER -- HERE IT IS -- SAYS

619
00:16:19,376 --> 00:16:20,209
"UNION DUES COST AROUND $700 A

620
00:16:20,276 --> 00:16:21,209
YEAR," AND THEN TELLS EMPLOYEES

621
00:16:21,276 --> 00:16:22,643
TO PUT THEIR MONEY TOWARDS A

622
00:16:22,709 --> 00:16:23,709
VIDEO GAME SYSTEM WITH THE

623
00:16:23,776 --> 00:16:29,976
LATEST HITS.

624
00:16:30,043 --> 00:16:30,743
>> John: OOOH, THE LATEST HITS,

625
00:16:30,809 --> 00:16:31,176
YOU SAY?

626
00:16:31,243 --> 00:16:32,343
TELLING YOUR WORKERS TO PLAY

627
00:16:32,409 --> 00:16:33,576
VIDEO GAMES INSTEAD OF

628
00:16:33,643 --> 00:16:34,076
UNIONIZING IS INCREDIBLY

629
00:16:34,143 --> 00:16:34,809
CONDESCENDING.

630
00:16:34,876 --> 00:16:35,743
AND DOUBLY SO WHEN YOU CONSIDER

631
00:16:35,809 --> 00:16:36,543
VIDEO GAME CHARACTERS ARE THE

632
00:16:36,609 --> 00:16:37,476
ULTIMATE EXAMPLE OF EXPLOITED

633
00:16:37,543 --> 00:16:38,743
LABOR.

634
00:16:38,809 --> 00:16:40,176
THINK ABOUT IT: THEY TAKE ORDERS

635
00:16:40,243 --> 00:16:42,309
ALL DAY, USUALLY GET PAID IN

636
00:16:42,376 --> 00:16:45,143
COINS, AND NOT ONCE IN 36 YEARS

637
00:16:45,209 --> 00:16:46,676
OF PLAYING MARIO HAVE I EVER

638
00:16:46,743 --> 00:16:47,876
SEEN HIM GET TO TAKE A

639
00:16:47,943 --> 00:16:50,176
BATHROOM BREAK.

640
00:16:50,243 --> 00:16:50,943
NOT ONCE!

641
00:16:51,009 --> 00:16:51,876
THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM HAS TO BE

642
00:16:51,943 --> 00:16:52,576
LITTERED WITH PISS BOTTLES AT

643
00:16:52,643 --> 00:16:54,809
THIS POINT.

644
00:16:54,876 --> 00:16:55,943
AND YOU MIGHT SAY, "WELL, OF

645
00:16:56,009 --> 00:16:57,443
COURSE A UNION COLLECTS DUES.

646
00:16:57,509 --> 00:16:59,143
HOW ELSE ARE THEY GOING TO HAVE

647
00:16:59,209 --> 00:17:00,943
THE RESOURCES TO FIGHT FOR THEIR

648
00:17:01,009 --> 00:17:02,576
MEMBERS?"

649
00:17:02,643 --> 00:17:03,743
BUT THESE CONSULTING FIRMS WILL

650
00:17:03,809 --> 00:17:06,843
INSIST THAT UNIONS SIMPLY TAKE

651
00:17:06,909 --> 00:17:08,143
MONEY AND OFFER NOTHING IN

652
00:17:08,209 --> 00:17:09,209
RETURN.

653
00:17:09,276 --> 00:17:11,809
HERE'S HOW THE LABOR RELATIONS

654
00:17:11,876 --> 00:17:14,376
INSTITUTE PUTS IT IN ONE OF ITS

655
00:17:14,443 --> 00:17:15,209
UNION-BUSTING VIDEOS.

656
00:17:15,276 --> 00:17:16,076
>> UNIONS ARE IN TROUBLE.

657
00:17:16,143 --> 00:17:16,909
THEIR MEMBERSHIP IS SHRINKING,

658
00:17:16,976 --> 00:17:18,209
WHICH MEANS THEY'RE IN DANGER OF

659
00:17:18,276 --> 00:17:19,543
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS.

660
00:17:19,609 --> 00:17:20,976
THEY SEND OUT HIGH-PRESSURE

661
00:17:21,043 --> 00:17:22,709
SALESPEOPLE TO SELL A BILL OF

662
00:17:22,776 --> 00:17:24,309
GOODS THAT MOST PEOPLE BELIEVE

663
00:17:24,376 --> 00:17:25,243
IS EITHER OF NO REAL VALUE OR IS

664
00:17:25,309 --> 00:17:27,443
HIGHLY OVERPRICED.

665
00:17:27,509 --> 00:17:30,343
>> John: SO JUST TO BE CLEAR,

666
00:17:30,409 --> 00:17:32,043
THAT'S A FOR-PROFIT CONSULTING

667
00:17:32,109 --> 00:17:33,876
FIRM, BEING PAID BY A FOR-PROFIT

668
00:17:33,943 --> 00:17:35,476
COMPANY, ARGUING UNIONS ARE ONLY

669
00:17:35,543 --> 00:17:38,476
IN IT FOR THE MONEY.

670
00:17:38,543 --> 00:17:39,743
THAT IS PRETTY FANTASTIC.

671
00:17:39,809 --> 00:17:40,676
IT'S NOT EVEN THE POT CALLING

672
00:17:40,743 --> 00:17:41,909
THE KETTLE BLACK, IT'S THE POT

673
00:17:41,976 --> 00:17:45,609
CALLING THE KETTLE "A POT."

674
00:17:45,676 --> 00:17:46,476
IT'S LIKE BEING CALLED A

675
00:17:46,543 --> 00:17:48,276
BAD FIRST DATE BY TED BUNDY.

676
00:17:48,343 --> 00:17:53,309
LRI CONSULTANTS HAVE ALSO TOLD

677
00:17:53,376 --> 00:17:54,243
EMPLOYEES THAT JOINING A UNION

678
00:17:54,309 --> 00:17:55,443
MIGHT GET THEM A CONTRACT WITH

679
00:17:55,509 --> 00:17:56,009
LESS WAGES AND LESS BENEFITS

680
00:17:56,076 --> 00:17:57,876
THAN THEY CURRENTLY HAVE.

681
00:17:57,943 --> 00:18:00,909
BUT THINK HOW RIDICULOUS THAT

682
00:18:00,976 --> 00:18:03,209
ARGUMENT IS.

683
00:18:03,276 --> 00:18:04,876
IF COMPANIES GENUINELY THOUGHT

684
00:18:04,943 --> 00:18:05,943
UNIONS WOULD NEGOTIATE WORSE

685
00:18:06,009 --> 00:18:06,676
TERMS FOR THEIR EMPLOYEES,

686
00:18:06,743 --> 00:18:07,943
THEY'D BE WELCOMING THEM IN WITH

687
00:18:08,009 --> 00:18:09,176
OPEN ARMS.

688
00:18:09,243 --> 00:18:10,943
JEFF BEZOS WOULD'VE SHOWN UP TO

689
00:18:11,009 --> 00:18:11,676
THAT INTERVIEW IN A CHE GUEVARA

690
00:18:11,743 --> 00:18:12,843
T-SHIRT IF HE THOUGHT IT WOULD

691
00:18:12,909 --> 00:18:15,376
HELP HIM PAY PEOPLE LESS.

692
00:18:15,443 --> 00:18:17,576
BECAUSE THE TRUTH IS UNIONIZED

693
00:18:17,643 --> 00:18:18,743
WORKERS IN THE PRIVATE SECTOR

694
00:18:18,809 --> 00:18:20,276
HAVE WAGES ABOUT 25% HIGHER THAN

695
00:18:20,343 --> 00:18:21,543
THEIR NON-UNION COUNTERPARTS.

696
00:18:21,609 --> 00:18:24,343
THAT'S WHY COMPANIES WANT TO

697
00:18:24,409 --> 00:18:25,809
KEEP UNIONS OUT.

698
00:18:25,876 --> 00:18:27,643
THAT'S WHY THEY'RE WILLING TO

699
00:18:27,709 --> 00:18:28,709
PAY LRI $3,000 PER CONSULTANT

700
00:18:28,776 --> 00:18:29,843
PER DAY.

701
00:18:29,909 --> 00:18:31,209
BUT THE ANTI-UNION ARGUMENT

702
00:18:31,276 --> 00:18:32,643
ISN'T JUST THAT THEY ARE

703
00:18:32,709 --> 00:18:34,376
USELESS -- IT'S THAT THEY'LL

704
00:18:34,443 --> 00:18:35,943
DESTROY THE BEAUTIFUL

705
00:18:36,009 --> 00:18:37,143
WORKPLACE CULTURE THAT

706
00:18:37,209 --> 00:18:39,543
COMPANIES HAVE CREATED.

707
00:18:39,609 --> 00:18:40,809
HERE'S HOW TARGET FRAMED IT IN

708
00:18:40,876 --> 00:18:43,043
ONE OF THEIR UNION-BUSTING

709
00:18:43,109 --> 00:18:44,709
VIDEOS.

710
00:18:44,776 --> 00:18:47,009
>> IF THE UNIONS DID TRY TO

711
00:18:47,076 --> 00:18:48,809
ORGANIZE TARGET TEAM MEMBERS,

712
00:18:48,876 --> 00:18:50,676
THEY COULD ALSO TRY AND BRING

713
00:18:50,743 --> 00:18:51,643
ALONG THEIR WAY OF DOING

714
00:18:51,709 --> 00:18:52,309
BUSINESS, AN OLD-FASHIONED,

715
00:18:52,376 --> 00:18:53,143
RIGID STRUCTURE.

716
00:18:53,209 --> 00:18:54,109
NO ONE KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT COULD

717
00:18:54,176 --> 00:18:56,209
HAPPEN, BUT THERE ARE LOTS

718
00:18:56,276 --> 00:18:57,309
OF EXAMPLES OF HOW RIGID

719
00:18:57,376 --> 00:18:58,476
GROCERY STORE UNION CONTRACTS

720
00:18:58,543 --> 00:19:00,109
COULD HURT OUR STORES' ABILITY

721
00:19:00,176 --> 00:19:02,809
TO SERVE GUESTS.

722
00:19:02,876 --> 00:19:04,443
>> HERE'S WHAT WE MEAN.

723
00:19:04,509 --> 00:19:06,276
♪ ♪

724
00:19:06,343 --> 00:19:07,976
LET'S SAY YOU'RE WORKING IN

725
00:19:08,043 --> 00:19:09,709
STATIONARY, BUT YOU'RE WALKING

726
00:19:09,776 --> 00:19:11,409
THROUGH DOMESTICS ON YOUR WAY TO

727
00:19:11,476 --> 00:19:13,876
CHECK ON SOMETHING.

728
00:19:13,943 --> 00:19:15,543
A GUEST STOPS YOU AND ASKS FOR

729
00:19:15,609 --> 00:19:17,676
HELP.

730
00:19:17,743 --> 00:19:20,676
WHAT WOULD YOU DO?

731
00:19:20,743 --> 00:19:21,509
WITHOUT EVEN THINKING ABOUT IT,

732
00:19:21,576 --> 00:19:22,176
YOU'D STOP AND GIVE THEM ANY

733
00:19:22,243 --> 00:19:22,943
ASSISTANCE THEY REQUIRED.

734
00:19:23,009 --> 00:19:24,009
BUT WHAT IF UNION WORK RULES SAY

735
00:19:24,076 --> 00:19:25,843
YOU CAN'T WORK OUTSIDE OF YOUR

736
00:19:25,909 --> 00:19:26,676
DEPARTMENT?

737
00:19:26,743 --> 00:19:28,043
WHAT DO YOU TELL THE GUEST?

738
00:19:28,109 --> 00:19:28,576
"SORRY, I N'T HELP YOU"?

739
00:19:28,643 --> 00:19:31,276
THAT MAKES YOU LOOK BAD.

740
00:19:31,343 --> 00:19:32,876
BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY, IT MEANS

741
00:19:32,943 --> 00:19:35,076
OUR GUEST DOESN'T GET IMMEDIATE

742
00:19:35,143 --> 00:19:36,809
ATTENTION AND THEY MIGHT NOT

743
00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:38,509
COME BACK.

744
00:19:38,576 --> 00:19:39,309
SO EVERYONE GETS HURT.

745
00:19:39,376 --> 00:19:40,009
EVERYONE EXCEPT THE UNION.

746
00:19:40,076 --> 00:19:42,109
>> John: OOH, I LIKE HOW THEY

747
00:19:42,176 --> 00:19:43,676
PUT THAT LAST PART IN BLACK AND

748
00:19:43,743 --> 00:19:45,209
WHITE, SO WE KNOW IT'S BAD.

749
00:19:45,276 --> 00:19:45,876
WE'RE TALKING "CAN'T OPEN A JAR"

750
00:19:45,943 --> 00:19:47,309
BAD.

751
00:19:47,376 --> 00:19:49,443
THERE'S GOT TO BE A BETTER WAY!

752
00:19:49,509 --> 00:19:51,876
BUT IF I CAN GIVE THE TARGET

753
00:19:51,943 --> 00:19:54,409
EXECUTIVES ONE NOTE:

754
00:19:54,476 --> 00:19:56,609
HAVE YOU EVER WORKED RETAIL?

755
00:19:56,676 --> 00:19:57,576
BECAUSE IF YOU HAD, YOU'D KNOW

756
00:19:57,643 --> 00:19:58,509
THAT TELLING YOUR FLOOR WORKERS

757
00:19:58,576 --> 00:20:00,509
THEY'D BE ABLE TO TELL A

758
00:20:00,576 --> 00:20:02,376
CUSTOMER "FUCK OFF, THIS ISN'T

759
00:20:02,443 --> 00:20:03,676
MY DEPARTMENT" IS A PRETTY GOOD

760
00:20:03,743 --> 00:20:04,376
ARGUMENT TO VOTE YES ON THAT

761
00:20:04,443 --> 00:20:05,343
UNION.

762
00:20:05,409 --> 00:20:06,843
HONESTLY, THAT MIGHT BE WORTH IT

763
00:20:06,909 --> 00:20:08,176
ON ITS OWN.

764
00:20:08,243 --> 00:20:09,909
AND FUN SIDE NOTE: THOSE

765
00:20:09,976 --> 00:20:11,543
AREN'T JUST ACTORS, THEY'RE

766
00:20:11,609 --> 00:20:13,809
UNION ACTORS -- MEMBERS OF

767
00:20:13,876 --> 00:20:18,676
THE SCREEN ACTORS GUILD.

768
00:20:18,743 --> 00:20:20,776
IN FACT, THAT MAN LATER ACTUALLY

769
00:20:20,843 --> 00:20:21,976
STRESSED IN AN INTERVIEW THAT HE

770
00:20:22,043 --> 00:20:22,676
IS VERY MUCH PRO-UNION,

771
00:20:22,743 --> 00:20:23,509
DEFENDING HIS APPEARANCE IN THE

772
00:20:23,576 --> 00:20:24,343
VIDEO BY SAYING, "IF SOMEONE

773
00:20:24,409 --> 00:20:25,276
HIRES ME TO PLAY A RAPIST,

774
00:20:25,343 --> 00:20:26,343
DOES IT MAKE ME A RAPIST?"

775
00:20:26,409 --> 00:20:27,743
TO WHICH I'D HAVE TO RESPOND

776
00:20:27,809 --> 00:20:30,376
"WHAT?"

777
00:20:30,443 --> 00:20:32,976
AND "I -- I GUESS NOT, BUT...

778
00:20:33,043 --> 00:20:36,243
WHAT?"

779
00:20:36,309 --> 00:20:37,443
BUT THE MOST FRIGHTENING AND

780
00:20:37,509 --> 00:20:38,443
EFFECTIVE ARGUMENT COMPANIES

781
00:20:38,509 --> 00:20:39,809
MAKE AGAINST UNIONS ISN'T JUST

782
00:20:39,876 --> 00:20:40,543
THAT THEY'LL KEEP YOU FROM

783
00:20:40,609 --> 00:20:41,409
HELPING CUSTOMERS IN OTHER

784
00:20:41,476 --> 00:20:43,243
DEPARTMENTS.

785
00:20:43,309 --> 00:20:44,376
IT'S THAT THEY'LL COST YOU YOUR

786
00:20:44,443 --> 00:20:45,643
JOB.

787
00:20:45,709 --> 00:20:46,943
NOW, THANKFULLY, IT'S AGAINST

788
00:20:47,009 --> 00:20:47,976
THE LAW FOR COMPANIES TO

789
00:20:48,043 --> 00:20:50,509
THREATEN WORKERS THAT IF THEY

790
00:20:50,576 --> 00:20:51,643
UNIONIZE, THEIR WORKPLACE WILL

791
00:20:51,709 --> 00:20:53,009
CLOSE.

792
00:20:53,076 --> 00:20:54,109
HOWEVER, HILARIOUSLY, IT IS

793
00:20:54,176 --> 00:20:55,509
LEGAL FOR THEM TO "PREDICT" THAT

794
00:20:55,576 --> 00:20:56,376
IT'LL SHUT DOWN.

795
00:20:56,443 --> 00:20:59,009
WHICH OBVIOUSLY ISN'T A REAL

796
00:20:59,076 --> 00:21:00,409
DISTINCTION.

797
00:21:00,476 --> 00:21:01,909
WHEN A LOAN SHARK THREATENS TO

798
00:21:01,976 --> 00:21:03,443
BREAK YOUR LEGS, THAT'S NOT

799
00:21:03,509 --> 00:21:05,476
MEANINGFULLY DIFFERENT FROM A

800
00:21:05,543 --> 00:21:06,443
LOAN SHARK "PREDICTING THAT LEGS

801
00:21:06,509 --> 00:21:07,476
WILL BE BROKEN AS A RESULT OF

802
00:21:07,543 --> 00:21:08,776
MARKET FORCES RELATING TO LACK

803
00:21:08,843 --> 00:21:10,243
OF PAYMENT."

804
00:21:10,309 --> 00:21:12,843
AND THAT PREDICTION LOOPHOLE CAN

805
00:21:12,909 --> 00:21:14,143
LET A LOT THROUGH -- FOR

806
00:21:14,209 --> 00:21:14,943
INSTANCE, COLUMBIA SPORTSWEAR

807
00:21:15,009 --> 00:21:16,709
BROUGHT IN A CONSULTANT WHO

808
00:21:16,776 --> 00:21:17,476
FREESTYLED TO A CAPTIVE MEETING

809
00:21:17,543 --> 00:21:19,043
OF WORKERS ABOUT WHAT COULD

810
00:21:19,109 --> 00:21:20,776
HAPPEN IF THEY UNIONIZE.

811
00:21:20,843 --> 00:21:23,809
>> I'VE SEEN THE WORST OF IT,

812
00:21:23,876 --> 00:21:26,309
DOESN'T ALWAYS END UP GOING SO

813
00:21:26,376 --> 00:21:27,276
BADLY, BUT I MEAN, I'VE SEEN

814
00:21:27,343 --> 00:21:29,009
PEOPLE, YOU KNOW, JUST

815
00:21:29,076 --> 00:21:30,143
COMPLETELY BANKRUPTED.

816
00:21:30,209 --> 00:21:36,343
MARRIAGES LOST, HOMES LOST, YOU

817
00:21:36,409 --> 00:21:37,609
KNOW --

818
00:21:37,676 --> 00:21:39,943
>> COMPANY CLOSING.

819
00:21:40,009 --> 00:21:41,409
>> YEAH, SOMETIMES THAT HAPPENS

820
00:21:41,476 --> 00:21:41,976
TOO.

821
00:21:42,076 --> 00:21:42,909
I MEAN, LOOK AT -- LOOK AT

822
00:21:42,976 --> 00:21:43,643
DETROIT.

823
00:21:43,709 --> 00:21:44,809
I MEAN, ALL THE -- THE AUTO

824
00:21:44,876 --> 00:21:45,476
WORKERS THERE, I MEAN, TENS OF

825
00:21:45,543 --> 00:21:46,343
THOUSANDS OF EMPLOYEES LOST

826
00:21:46,409 --> 00:21:47,376
THEIR JOBS OVERNIGHT.

827
00:21:47,443 --> 00:21:48,843
>> John: WOW.

828
00:21:48,909 --> 00:21:49,476
THAT IS A LEVEL OF FEARMONGERING

829
00:21:49,543 --> 00:21:50,676
RARELY SEEN OUTSIDE AN

830
00:21:50,743 --> 00:21:52,676
ABSTINENCE-ONLY SEX ED CLASS.

831
00:21:52,743 --> 00:21:54,309
"DON'T JOIN A UNION -- UNLESS

832
00:21:54,376 --> 00:21:55,376
YOU WANT TO END UP PREGNANT,

833
00:21:55,443 --> 00:21:56,643
DIVORCED, HOMELESS, AND

834
00:21:56,709 --> 00:21:58,343
DETROIT."

835
00:21:58,409 --> 00:21:59,843
AND IT'S NOT JUST COLUMBIA

836
00:21:59,909 --> 00:22:02,676
SPORTSWEAR -- WHEN WORKERS AT A

837
00:22:02,743 --> 00:22:04,409
TIRE COMPANY CALLED KUMHO TRIED

838
00:22:04,476 --> 00:22:05,609
TO UNIONIZE A FEW YEARS BACK,

839
00:22:05,676 --> 00:22:06,843
12 DIFFERENT MANAGERS ISSUED

840
00:22:06,909 --> 00:22:08,209
THREATS TO CLOSE THE PLANT IF

841
00:22:08,276 --> 00:22:09,043
THE UNION WON.

842
00:22:09,109 --> 00:22:10,909
WHICH IS UNDENIABLY SCARY.

843
00:22:10,976 --> 00:22:11,809
AND IT WORKED -- BECAUSE EVEN

844
00:22:11,876 --> 00:22:15,143
THOUGH 80% OF KUMHO WORKERS HAD

845
00:22:15,209 --> 00:22:17,909
INITIALLY SIGNED CARDS

846
00:22:17,976 --> 00:22:19,876
SUPPORTING UNIONIZATION, WHEN

847
00:22:19,943 --> 00:22:22,176
THE VOTE HAPPENED, LESS THAN A

848
00:22:22,243 --> 00:22:23,343
MONTH LATER, ONLY 43% VOTED TO

849
00:22:23,409 --> 00:22:26,976
ORGANIZE.

850
00:22:27,043 --> 00:22:28,809
AND THAT'S THE THING.

851
00:22:28,876 --> 00:22:30,176
THREATS THAT A WORKPLACE WILL

852
00:22:30,243 --> 00:22:31,243
CLOSE ARE EFFECTIVE, DESPITE

853
00:22:31,309 --> 00:22:32,943
BEING OVERWHELMINGLY BULLSHIT.

854
00:22:33,009 --> 00:22:34,209
ONE STUDY FOUND 51% OF COMPANIES

855
00:22:34,276 --> 00:22:35,643
THREATENED TO CLOSE PLANTS IF

856
00:22:35,709 --> 00:22:37,543
UNIONS WON, WHILE JUST 1%

857
00:22:37,609 --> 00:22:41,509
ACTUALLY CLOSED OPERATIONS AFTER

858
00:22:41,576 --> 00:22:42,943
A UNION VICTORY.

859
00:22:43,009 --> 00:22:44,076
IT'S THE SAME STORY AGAIN AND

860
00:22:44,143 --> 00:22:46,609
AGAIN, AND IT CAN BE DISPIRITING

861
00:22:46,676 --> 00:22:48,143
FOR THOSE WHO KNOW HOW MUCH GOOD

862
00:22:48,209 --> 00:22:49,076
A UNION COULD DO FOR THEIR

863
00:22:49,143 --> 00:22:51,176
COWORKERS.

864
00:22:51,243 --> 00:22:54,143
LISTEN TO A WOMAN WHO TRIED TO

865
00:22:54,209 --> 00:22:55,943
ORGANIZE HER NISSAN PLANT, TALK

866
00:22:56,009 --> 00:22:56,943
ABOUT HOW IT FELT, WATCHING HER

867
00:22:57,009 --> 00:22:58,943
UNION DRIVE FALL APART:

868
00:22:59,009 --> 00:23:00,443
>> WHEN WE STARTED THIS, I MEAN,

869
00:23:00,509 --> 00:23:01,909
MY WHOLE LINE WAS JUST -- THEY

870
00:23:01,976 --> 00:23:03,643
WERE JUST, "YES."

871
00:23:03,709 --> 00:23:06,576
BUT WHEN NISSAN STARTED BRINGING

872
00:23:06,643 --> 00:23:07,776
IN THOSE ANTI-UNION VIDEOS, I

873
00:23:07,843 --> 00:23:11,843
SEEN MY COWORKERS, JUST, THE

874
00:23:11,909 --> 00:23:14,776
LOOK ON THEIR FACE, IT WAS,

875
00:23:14,843 --> 00:23:18,909
"BETTY, I JUST CAN'T DO IT."

876
00:23:18,976 --> 00:23:20,309
>> John: YEAH, THAT'S

877
00:23:20,376 --> 00:23:23,443
HEARTBREAKING.

878
00:23:23,509 --> 00:23:26,309
AND FRUSTRATINGLY, EVEN ON THE

879
00:23:26,376 --> 00:23:27,543
RARE OCCASION WORKERS MANAGE TO

880
00:23:27,609 --> 00:23:28,643
OVERCOME EVERYTHING YOU'VE SEEN

881
00:23:28,709 --> 00:23:29,376
TONIGHT AND WIN THEIR ELECTION,

882
00:23:29,443 --> 00:23:30,309
THE FIGHT STILL MIGHT NOT BE

883
00:23:30,376 --> 00:23:30,976
OVER.

884
00:23:31,043 --> 00:23:31,776
AS A STUDY FOUND, IN A QUARTER

885
00:23:31,843 --> 00:23:32,476
OF ALL SUCCESSFUL UNION

886
00:23:32,543 --> 00:23:33,209
ELECTIONS, GETTING A CONTRACT

887
00:23:33,276 --> 00:23:34,176
CAN TAKE THREE YEARS OR LONGER.

888
00:23:34,243 --> 00:23:35,376
AND WHILE COMPANIES ARE SUPPOSED

889
00:23:35,443 --> 00:23:36,409
TO BARGAIN IN GOOD FAITH, THEY

890
00:23:36,476 --> 00:23:37,409
CAN LEGALLY DRAW THINGS OUT TO A

891
00:23:37,476 --> 00:23:38,743
RIDICULOUS DEGREE.

892
00:23:38,809 --> 00:23:39,843
IN 2009, SOME TEXAS EMPLOYEES AT

893
00:23:39,909 --> 00:23:42,576
DISH NETWORK VOTED TO UNIONIZE,

894
00:23:42,643 --> 00:23:44,509
BUT OVER A DECADE LATER, THEY

895
00:23:44,576 --> 00:23:46,509
STILL HAVE NO CONTRACT.

896
00:23:46,576 --> 00:23:47,876
AND THINK ABOUT HOW LONG AGO

897
00:23:47,943 --> 00:23:50,443
2009 WAS.

898
00:23:50,509 --> 00:23:52,109
BACK THEN, THE KIDS ON

899
00:23:52,176 --> 00:23:53,809
"MODERN FAMILY" LOOKED LIKE

900
00:23:53,876 --> 00:23:54,876
ACTUAL CHILDREN, AND AT THAT

901
00:23:54,943 --> 00:23:56,076
POINT, NONE OF THEM WERE ENGAGED

902
00:23:56,143 --> 00:23:57,309
TO THE BARTENDER FROM THE

903
00:23:57,376 --> 00:23:59,209
"BACHELOR" FRANCHISE.

904
00:23:59,276 --> 00:23:59,976
IN 2009, THE QUESTION ON

905
00:24:00,043 --> 00:24:00,843
EVERYONE'S LIPS WAS "IS THE GUY

906
00:24:00,909 --> 00:24:01,709
FROM 'DEGRASSI' REALLY RAPPING

907
00:24:01,776 --> 00:24:03,809
NOW?

908
00:24:03,876 --> 00:24:06,809
IS HE REALLY DOING THAT?"

909
00:24:06,876 --> 00:24:07,909
AND YOU REALLY WANT ME TO

910
00:24:07,976 --> 00:24:09,243
TRANSPORT YOU BACK TO THAT TIME?

911
00:24:09,309 --> 00:24:10,243
TWO WORDS.

912
00:24:10,309 --> 00:24:11,876
SUSAN BOYLE.

913
00:24:11,943 --> 00:24:13,276
REMEMBER HOW HER WHOLE THING

914
00:24:13,343 --> 00:24:14,043
WAS, "WE DIDN'T EXPECT SOMEONE

915
00:24:14,109 --> 00:24:14,909
WHO LOOKED NORMAL COULD SING

916
00:24:14,976 --> 00:24:16,709
GOOD"?

917
00:24:16,776 --> 00:24:18,043
THE POINT IS, 2009 WAS A LONG

918
00:24:18,109 --> 00:24:19,276
TIME AGO, AND THAT'S HOW

919
00:24:19,343 --> 00:24:21,209
RIDICULOUSLY LONG THE EMPLOYEES

920
00:24:21,276 --> 00:24:22,509
OF DISH NETWORK HAVE BEEN

921
00:24:22,576 --> 00:24:24,909
WAITING FOR A FAIR UNION

922
00:24:24,976 --> 00:24:25,909
CONTRACT.

923
00:24:25,976 --> 00:24:26,843
AND THAT ACTUALLY BRINGS US TO

924
00:24:26,909 --> 00:24:28,676
THE FINAL PROBLEM HERE.

925
00:24:28,743 --> 00:24:30,043
BECAUSE FAR TOO OFTEN, THE

926
00:24:30,109 --> 00:24:32,576
CONSEQUENCES FOR ANTI-UNION

927
00:24:32,643 --> 00:24:33,209
ACTIONS BY COMPANIES ARE MINIMAL

928
00:24:33,276 --> 00:24:34,209
TO NONE.

929
00:24:34,276 --> 00:24:35,643
FOR INSTANCE, COMPANIES AREN'T

930
00:24:35,709 --> 00:24:37,076
SUPPOSED TO RETALIATE AGAINST

931
00:24:37,143 --> 00:24:38,309
WORKERS WHO UNIONIZE, BUT IT

932
00:24:38,376 --> 00:24:40,176
HAPPENS ALL THE TIME.

933
00:24:40,243 --> 00:24:41,209
TAKE CYNTHIA HARPER, WHO WORKED

934
00:24:41,276 --> 00:24:43,009
AT A FACTORY THAT MADE

935
00:24:43,076 --> 00:24:44,076
WINDSHIELDS.

936
00:24:44,143 --> 00:24:46,109
AFTER SHE SPOKE UP IN FAVOR OF A

937
00:24:46,176 --> 00:24:47,676
UNION, SHE HAD A PRETTY SUDDEN,

938
00:24:47,743 --> 00:24:48,643
AND PRETTY SUSPICIOUS, CHANGE TO

939
00:24:48,709 --> 00:24:50,009
HER JOB.

940
00:24:50,076 --> 00:24:51,043
>> EVER SINCE THEY STARTED THIS

941
00:24:51,109 --> 00:24:54,643
JOB, IT'S BEEN A TWO-MAN JOB.

942
00:24:54,709 --> 00:24:57,543
WHEN THEY PUT ME OUT HERE ON IT,

943
00:24:57,609 --> 00:24:58,543
THEY DECIDED THEY WANTED IT TO

944
00:24:58,609 --> 00:25:03,309
BE A ONE-PERSON'S JOB.

945
00:25:03,376 --> 00:25:04,143
WHEN I WOULD TALK TO HR,

946
00:25:04,209 --> 00:25:04,976
I TOLD THEM THEY WERE

947
00:25:05,043 --> 00:25:06,109
TARGETING ME.

948
00:25:06,176 --> 00:25:07,709
PUTTING ME ON A JOB TO SET ME UP

949
00:25:07,776 --> 00:25:09,709
TO WRITE ME UP FOR PERFORMANCE

950
00:25:09,776 --> 00:25:21,276
ISSUES AND FIRE ME.

951
00:25:21,343 --> 00:25:22,476
>> John: OKAY, THAT'S PRETTY

952
00:25:22,543 --> 00:25:24,043
BRAZEN.

953
00:25:24,109 --> 00:25:25,076
THEY TOOK A JOB CLEARLY FOR TWO

954
00:25:25,143 --> 00:25:26,143
PEOPLE AND MADE HER DO IT ON HER

955
00:25:26,209 --> 00:25:27,443
OWN.

956
00:25:27,509 --> 00:25:29,143
AND IF YOU'RE GOING TO SET HER

957
00:25:29,209 --> 00:25:30,943
UP FOR FAILURE, WHY STOP THERE?

958
00:25:31,009 --> 00:25:32,443
WHY NOT GIVE HER EVERYONE'S JOB?

959
00:25:32,509 --> 00:25:33,609
WHY NOT SEND THE ENTIRE FACTORY

960
00:25:33,676 --> 00:25:34,676
HOME WITH A NOTE SAYING "RELAX,

961
00:25:34,743 --> 00:25:36,276
EVERYONE -- CYNTHIA'S GOT THIS."

962
00:25:36,343 --> 00:25:38,943
AND THE THING IS, SHE WAS RIGHT.

963
00:25:39,009 --> 00:25:40,109
SOON AFTER THAT, SHE WAS

964
00:25:40,176 --> 00:25:41,609
FIRED, ALONG WITH TWO OTHER

965
00:25:41,676 --> 00:25:43,943
PRO-UNION COWORKERS.

966
00:25:44,009 --> 00:25:51,743
BUT THE CONSEQUENCES FOR A

967
00:25:51,809 --> 00:25:52,509
COMPANY DOING THAT ARE JUST

968
00:25:52,576 --> 00:25:53,209
PATHETIC.

969
00:25:53,276 --> 00:25:53,809
A COMPANY THAT WRONGLY

970
00:25:53,876 --> 00:25:55,343
TERMINATES A WORKER FOR

971
00:25:55,409 --> 00:25:56,043
SUPPORTING A UNION MIGHT BE

972
00:25:56,109 --> 00:25:56,743
FORCED TO PROVIDE BACK PAY --

973
00:25:56,809 --> 00:25:57,609
BUT THAT'S A PRETTY SMALL PRICE

974
00:25:57,676 --> 00:25:58,576
TO PAY IF IT HELPS THEM CRUSH A

975
00:25:58,643 --> 00:26:02,943
UNION.

976
00:26:03,009 --> 00:26:03,609
OTHER PUNISHMENTS ARE EVEN

977
00:26:03,676 --> 00:26:04,376
WEAKER, LIKE THE FACT THAT --

978
00:26:04,443 --> 00:26:04,976
AND THIS IS TRUE -- A COMPANY

979
00:26:05,043 --> 00:26:05,609
CAN BE ORDERED TO POST A NOTICE

980
00:26:05,676 --> 00:26:06,309
ON THE BULLETIN BOARD, IN WHICH

981
00:26:06,376 --> 00:26:07,109
IT ADMITS IT VIOLATED THE LAW,

982
00:26:07,176 --> 00:26:08,076
BUT ALSO, AND THIS IS CRUCIAL,

983
00:26:08,143 --> 00:26:10,843
PROMISES NOT TO DO IT AGAIN.

984
00:26:10,909 --> 00:26:12,509
AND COME ON.

985
00:26:12,576 --> 00:26:13,709
A COMPANY SHOULD PROBABLY FACE

986
00:26:13,776 --> 00:26:15,343
MORE CONSEQUENCES FOR ILLEGALLY

987
00:26:15,409 --> 00:26:16,609
UNION-BUSTING THAN THIS DOG, WHO

988
00:26:16,676 --> 00:26:18,943
CLEARLY LIKES TO HUMP THIS CAT.

989
00:26:19,009 --> 00:26:20,543
AND HONESTLY, IN BOTH CASES I

990
00:26:20,609 --> 00:26:21,643
DOUBT THE SIGN IS GOING TO

991
00:26:21,709 --> 00:26:27,309
CHANGE THE UNDERLYING BEHAVIOR.

992
00:26:27,376 --> 00:26:27,943
SO IT'S NO WONDER THAT U.S.

993
00:26:28,009 --> 00:26:29,676
EMPLOYERS ARE CHARGED WITH

994
00:26:29,743 --> 00:26:30,276
VIOLATING FEDERAL LAW IN OVER

995
00:26:30,343 --> 00:26:31,209
40% OF ALL UNION ELECTION

996
00:26:31,276 --> 00:26:32,276
CAMPAIGNS, BECAUSE WHY WOULDN'T

997
00:26:32,343 --> 00:26:33,176
THEY?

998
00:26:33,243 --> 00:26:34,376
EVEN WHEN THOSE CHARGES ARE

999
00:26:34,443 --> 00:26:35,409
PROVEN, THE CONSEQUENCES ARE

1000
00:26:35,476 --> 00:26:37,576
LAUGHABLE.

1001
00:26:37,643 --> 00:26:38,709
ONE ANTI-UNION CONSULTANT HAS

1002
00:26:38,776 --> 00:26:40,443
FLAT-OUT STATED, "WHAT HAPPENS

1003
00:26:40,509 --> 00:26:42,509
IF YOU VIOLATE THE LAW?

1004
00:26:42,576 --> 00:26:43,143
THE PROBABILITY IS YOU WILL

1005
00:26:43,209 --> 00:26:44,443
NEVER GET CAUGHT.

1006
00:26:44,509 --> 00:26:45,743
IF YOU DO GET CAUGHT, THE WORST

1007
00:26:45,809 --> 00:26:47,276
THING THAT CAN HAPPEN TO YOU IS

1008
00:26:47,343 --> 00:26:49,209
YOU GET A SECOND ELECTION AND

1009
00:26:49,276 --> 00:26:51,509
THE EMPLOYER WINS 96% OF SECOND

1010
00:26:51,576 --> 00:26:52,609
ELECTIONS."

1011
00:26:52,676 --> 00:26:53,843
AND IT'S NOT GREAT THAT

1012
00:26:53,909 --> 00:26:55,443
UNION-BUSTING FIRMS ARE TELLING

1013
00:26:55,509 --> 00:26:57,643
COMPANIES THAT.

1014
00:26:57,709 --> 00:27:00,409
BUT IT'S EVEN WORSE THAT IT'S

1015
00:27:00,476 --> 00:27:01,243
FUCKING TRUE.

1016
00:27:01,309 --> 00:27:02,076
SO WHAT CAN WE DO?

1017
00:27:02,143 --> 00:27:03,043
WELL, CONGRESS COULD STEP IN TO

1018
00:27:03,109 --> 00:27:03,809
HELP REBALANCE THE PLAYING

1019
00:27:03,876 --> 00:27:04,776
FIELD.

1020
00:27:04,843 --> 00:27:05,776
THE "PROTECTING THE RIGHT TO

1021
00:27:05,843 --> 00:27:07,143
ORGANIZE ACT," OR "P.R.O. ACT,"

1022
00:27:07,209 --> 00:27:08,543
WOULD OUTLAW CAPTIVE AUDIENCE

1023
00:27:08,609 --> 00:27:10,509
MEETINGS AND ENABLE SUCCESSFULLY

1024
00:27:10,576 --> 00:27:11,443
UNIONIZED WORKFORCES TO SEEK

1025
00:27:11,509 --> 00:27:13,476
ARBITRATION TO SETTLE A FIRST

1026
00:27:13,543 --> 00:27:14,576
CONTRACT, MEANING COMPANIES LIKE

1027
00:27:14,643 --> 00:27:16,476
DISH CAN'T GIVE THEM THE MIDDLE

1028
00:27:16,543 --> 00:27:17,243
FINGER FOR DECADES.

1029
00:27:17,309 --> 00:27:18,443
ALSO, AND PERHAPS MOST

1030
00:27:18,509 --> 00:27:19,609
IMPORTANTLY, IT'D PUT REAL

1031
00:27:19,676 --> 00:27:21,009
FINANCIAL PENALTIES IN PLACE TO

1032
00:27:21,076 --> 00:27:22,109
PREVENT COMPANIES FROM VIOLATING

1033
00:27:22,176 --> 00:27:23,043
WORKERS' RIGHTS WITHOUT

1034
00:27:23,109 --> 00:27:26,009
CONSEQUENCE.

1035
00:27:26,076 --> 00:27:29,676
BUT UNTIL THAT LAW IS PASSED,

1036
00:27:29,743 --> 00:27:31,976
AND IT SHOULD PASS,

1037
00:27:32,043 --> 00:27:32,943
ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS

1038
00:27:33,009 --> 00:27:33,709
FOR WORKERS TO DO IS TRY NOT TO

1039
00:27:33,776 --> 00:27:34,243
GET DISHEARTENED DURING A

1040
00:27:34,309 --> 00:27:35,976
CAMPAIGN.

1041
00:27:36,043 --> 00:27:37,609
WHICH I KNOW ISN'T EASY.

1042
00:27:37,676 --> 00:27:38,643
BUT UNION-BUSTING IS ALL ABOUT

1043
00:27:38,709 --> 00:27:39,743
KILLING MOMENTUM, SPLINTERING

1044
00:27:39,809 --> 00:27:41,009
UNITY, AND EXHAUSTING WORKERS'

1045
00:27:41,076 --> 00:27:42,243
SPIRITS.

1046
00:27:42,309 --> 00:27:43,676
SO TO THE EXTENT IT HELPS, IF

1047
00:27:43,743 --> 00:27:45,476
YOU'RE IN A WORKPLACE THAT'S

1048
00:27:45,543 --> 00:27:46,276
UNIONIZING RIGHT NOW AND YOU'RE

1049
00:27:46,343 --> 00:27:47,943
FEELING PRESSURED OR PERSONALLY

1050
00:27:48,009 --> 00:27:49,743
ATTACKED, REMEMBER, THE COMPANY

1051
00:27:49,809 --> 00:27:50,909
IS ALMOST CERTAINLY FOLLOWING A

1052
00:27:50,976 --> 00:27:51,676
SCRIPT.

1053
00:27:51,743 --> 00:27:53,243
AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO PLAY THE

1054
00:27:53,309 --> 00:27:54,209
PART THEY WANT YOU TO.

1055
00:27:54,276 --> 00:27:55,843
AND IF, BY SOME CHANCE, YOU'RE A

1056
00:27:55,909 --> 00:27:57,909
CORPORATE EXECUTIVE WHO'S MADE

1057
00:27:57,976 --> 00:28:01,843
IT THIS FAR INTO THE SHOW,

1058
00:28:01,909 --> 00:28:02,409
FIRST, I'M ALMOST IMPRESSED

1059
00:28:02,476 --> 00:28:04,476
YOU'RE STILL HERE.

1060
00:28:04,543 --> 00:28:05,609
SECOND, PLEASE STOP WASTING

1061
00:28:05,676 --> 00:28:06,743
MONEY ON THESE ANTI-UNION

1062
00:28:06,809 --> 00:28:07,409
CONSULTING FIRMS.

1063
00:28:07,476 --> 00:28:08,343
INSTEAD, JUST USE THIS VIDEO WE

1064
00:28:08,409 --> 00:28:09,609
MADE FOR YOU -- IT'S A LOT

1065
00:28:09,676 --> 00:28:11,243
CHEAPER, AND IT SAYS EXACTLY

1066
00:28:11,309 --> 00:28:13,509
WHAT YOU REALLY MEAN.

1067
00:28:13,576 --> 00:28:18,509
♪ ♪

1068
00:28:18,576 --> 00:28:19,609
>> HELLO, THANKS FOR JOINING US

1069
00:28:19,676 --> 00:28:21,243
TODAY AND WATCHING THIS

1070
00:28:21,309 --> 00:28:22,743
MANDATORY COMPANY VIDEO.

1071
00:28:22,809 --> 00:28:24,376
>> YOU ARE HERE BECAUSE SOMEONE

1072
00:28:24,443 --> 00:28:25,276
MAY HAVE APPROACHED YOU ABOUT

1073
00:28:25,343 --> 00:28:28,376
UNIONIZING.

1074
00:28:28,443 --> 00:28:29,543
>> OR ASKED YOU TO SIGN A UNION

1075
00:28:29,609 --> 00:28:29,743
CARD.

1076
00:28:29,809 --> 00:28:30,809
>> OR SIMPLY SAID THE WORDS

1077
00:28:30,876 --> 00:28:32,909
"LIVING WAGE" ANYWHERE OUT LOUD

1078
00:28:32,976 --> 00:28:34,143
ON COMPANY GROUNDS.

1079
00:28:34,209 --> 00:28:35,809
>> A UNION MAY WORK FOR A LOT OF

1080
00:28:35,876 --> 00:28:37,343
PLACES, BUT THE THING IS, HERE,

1081
00:28:37,409 --> 00:28:38,143
WE ARE A FAMILY, AND YOU

1082
00:28:38,209 --> 00:28:40,176
EMPLOYEES ARE CHILDREN.

1083
00:28:40,243 --> 00:28:41,609
>> SO LET'S LISTEN IN ON SOME

1084
00:28:41,676 --> 00:28:43,343
WORKER CONVERSATIONS.

1085
00:28:43,409 --> 00:28:44,676
>> SOMETHING WE DEFINITELY DON'T

1086
00:28:44,743 --> 00:28:47,276
DO IN REAL LIFE.

1087
00:28:47,343 --> 00:28:49,676
>> HEY, BOB, DID YOU KNOW IF WE

1088
00:28:49,743 --> 00:28:50,743
BROUGHT ON A UNION IT WOULD BE

1089
00:28:50,809 --> 00:28:51,709
ILLEGAL FOR US TO TALK TO OUR

1090
00:28:51,776 --> 00:28:52,509
BOSSES ANYMORE?

1091
00:28:52,576 --> 00:28:56,543
>> NO WAY.

1092
00:28:56,609 --> 00:28:59,009
THERE'S TWO THINGS I LOVE IN

1093
00:28:59,076 --> 00:29:01,409
THIS WORLD, TALKING DIRECTLY TO

1094
00:29:01,476 --> 00:29:04,876
MY SHIFT SUPERVISOR

1095
00:29:04,943 --> 00:29:05,409
AND HELPING CUSTOMERS AND

1096
00:29:05,476 --> 00:29:06,809
DEPARTMENTS I DON'T WORK IN.

1097
00:29:06,876 --> 00:29:07,876
>> BAD NEWS, BOB, IF A UNION

1098
00:29:07,943 --> 00:29:08,743
CAME IN, YOU COULDN'T DO THAT.

1099
00:29:08,809 --> 00:29:09,376
YEAH, IF A CUSTOMER WAS OUTSIDE

1100
00:29:09,443 --> 00:29:09,976
OF YOUR DEPARTMENT ASKS YOU A

1101
00:29:10,043 --> 00:29:10,509
QUESTION, YOU ARE LEGALLY

1102
00:29:10,576 --> 00:29:11,176
REQUIRED TO GO TELL THEM TO GO

1103
00:29:11,243 --> 00:29:11,876
FUCK THEMSELVES.

1104
00:29:11,943 --> 00:29:13,143
AND IF THEY ASK YOU A FOLLOW-UP

1105
00:29:13,209 --> 00:29:13,943
QUESTION, YOU'D HAVE TO SLAP

1106
00:29:14,009 --> 00:29:16,343
THEM WITH AN OPEN HAND.

1107
00:29:16,409 --> 00:29:18,209
SO EVERYONE GETS HURT.

1108
00:29:18,276 --> 00:29:21,076
EVERYONE EXCEPT THE UNION.

1109
00:29:21,143 --> 00:29:22,376
>> WAIT, HOW COULD THE UNION

1110
00:29:22,443 --> 00:29:23,276
POSSIBLY BENEFIT FROM SOME --

1111
00:29:23,343 --> 00:29:29,043
♪ ♪

1112
00:29:29,109 --> 00:29:30,609
>> WE DON'T THINK THE UNION'S

1113
00:29:30,676 --> 00:29:31,509
RIGHT FOR OUR WORKPLACE.

1114
00:29:31,576 --> 00:29:32,409
BUT ULTIMATELY, THE CHOICE IS UP

1115
00:29:32,476 --> 00:29:33,076
TO OUR EMPLOYEES.

1116
00:29:33,143 --> 00:29:33,809
>> WE PROMISE NO ONE WILL BE

1117
00:29:33,876 --> 00:29:34,976
FIRED FOR WANTING TO UNIONIZE.

1118
00:29:35,043 --> 00:29:35,843
ALTHOUGH THERE IS A CHANCE YOU

1119
00:29:35,909 --> 00:29:36,643
MIGHT BE FIRED FOR POOR

1120
00:29:36,709 --> 00:29:37,309
ATTENDANCE.

1121
00:29:37,376 --> 00:29:38,209
>> A PRETTY GOOD CHANCE,

1122
00:29:38,276 --> 00:29:39,209
ACTUALLY.

1123
00:29:39,276 --> 00:29:44,376
>> BUT YOU WON'T BE FIRED

1124
00:29:44,443 --> 00:29:45,276
EXPLICITLY FOR THE UNION THING.

1125
00:29:45,343 --> 00:29:45,709
THAT'S HOW WE DO IT.

1126
00:29:45,776 --> 00:29:46,476
FOR THE NEXT FEW WEEKS, YOU

1127
00:29:46,543 --> 00:29:47,209
MIGHT NOTICE A FEW EXTRA POSTERS

1128
00:29:47,276 --> 00:29:47,943
AROUND THE WORKPLACE, IN

1129
00:29:48,009 --> 00:29:49,709
BREAK ROOMS, STOCK ROOMS,

1130
00:29:49,776 --> 00:29:50,909
BATHROOMS, OR GLUED TO THE BACK

1131
00:29:50,976 --> 00:29:52,543
OF A COWORKER.

1132
00:29:52,609 --> 00:29:53,609
YOU ALREADY WENT TO THE

1133
00:29:53,676 --> 00:29:56,109
BATHROOM, TED.

1134
00:29:56,176 --> 00:29:57,776
THESE ARE JUST THERE TO TELL YOU

1135
00:29:57,843 --> 00:29:58,576
THINGS LIKE HOW EXPENSIVE UNION

1136
00:29:58,643 --> 00:30:00,409
DUES ARE.

1137
00:30:00,476 --> 00:30:02,043
$700?

1138
00:30:02,109 --> 00:30:03,209
THINK OF WHAT ELSE YOU COULD BUY

1139
00:30:03,276 --> 00:30:05,943
WITH THAT.

1140
00:30:06,009 --> 00:30:06,743
LIKE A NINTENDO WII WITH ALL

1141
00:30:06,809 --> 00:30:07,843
THE LATEST HITS.

1142
00:30:07,909 --> 00:30:09,876
OR, I DON'T KNOW, WHAT ELSE DO

1143
00:30:09,943 --> 00:30:14,043
POOR PEOPLE LIKE?

1144
00:30:14,109 --> 00:30:14,943
POOR PEOPLE, POOR PEOPLE,

1145
00:30:15,009 --> 00:30:16,109
POOR...

1146
00:30:16,176 --> 00:30:19,043
I KNOW I'VE SEEN POOR PEOPLE.

1147
00:30:19,109 --> 00:30:21,843
[SNAPS]

1148
00:30:21,909 --> 00:30:22,443
DUH.

1149
00:30:22,509 --> 00:30:23,176
DRUGS!

1150
00:30:23,243 --> 00:30:27,243
BUY AND EAT DRUGS.

1151
00:30:27,309 --> 00:30:29,109
>> DID YOU KNOW WHEN A UNION

1152
00:30:29,176 --> 00:30:30,109
ENTERS A NEGOTIATION

1153
00:30:30,176 --> 00:30:31,209
OUR WAGES COULD GO UP OR THEY

1154
00:30:31,276 --> 00:30:31,643
COULD GO DOWN.

1155
00:30:31,709 --> 00:30:32,643
>> WAIT, OUR WAGES COULD GO UP?

1156
00:30:32,709 --> 00:30:33,309
>> BUT THEY COULD GO DOWN.

1157
00:30:33,376 --> 00:30:33,909
>> REALISTICALLY THOUGH, THEY

1158
00:30:33,976 --> 00:30:34,843
COULD GO UP.

1159
00:30:34,909 --> 00:30:38,443
>> BUT THEY COULD GO DOWN.

1160
00:30:38,509 --> 00:30:40,009
>> BUT WITHOUT A UNION, WHAT'S

1161
00:30:40,076 --> 00:30:41,343
PREVENTING THEM FROM GOING DOWN

1162
00:30:41,409 --> 00:30:41,509
NOW?

1163
00:30:41,576 --> 00:30:42,643
>> BUT THEY COULD GO DOWN.

1164
00:30:42,709 --> 00:30:43,409
>> RIGHT, JUST TECHNICALLY

1165
00:30:43,476 --> 00:30:44,176
SPEAKING --

1166
00:30:44,243 --> 00:30:45,176
>> HEY, I WANT TO TALK TO YOU

1167
00:30:45,243 --> 00:30:46,443
ABOUT YOUR ATTENDANCE.

1168
00:30:46,509 --> 00:30:48,309
>> JUST REMEMBER, WHEN IT COMES

1169
00:30:48,376 --> 00:30:49,343
TO UNIONS, THE CHOICE IS YOURS.

1170
00:30:49,409 --> 00:30:50,443
WHEN IT COMES TO WATCHING VIDEOS

1171
00:30:50,509 --> 00:30:51,909
LIKE THIS ABOUT UNIONS, THE

1172
00:30:51,976 --> 00:30:54,109
CHOICE IS VERY MUCH OURS.

1173
00:30:54,176 --> 00:30:59,109
DID I SAY STOP WAVING?

1174
00:30:59,176 --> 00:31:01,876
♪ ♪

1175
00:31:01,943 --> 00:31:05,609
>> John: MOVING ON, FINALLY

1176
00:31:05,676 --> 00:31:09,543
TONIGHT, THIS IS ACTUALLY OUR

1177
00:31:09,609 --> 00:31:11,176
LAST SHOW OF THE SEASON, AND IT

1178
00:31:11,243 --> 00:31:14,409
HAS BEEN A TRICKY YEAR.

1179
00:31:14,476 --> 00:31:16,309
WE BEGAN IT STILL STUCK IN THE

1180
00:31:16,376 --> 00:31:16,476
VOID

1181
00:31:16,543 --> 00:31:17,243
BEFORE FINALLY MANAGING TO MOVE

1182
00:31:17,309 --> 00:31:17,876
INTO THIS STUDIO IN SEPTEMBER.

1183
00:31:17,943 --> 00:31:18,643
IN SPITE OF THE FACT THAT WE'VE

1184
00:31:18,709 --> 00:31:19,243
BEEN HAVING TO OPERATE UNDER

1185
00:31:19,309 --> 00:31:19,809
TIGHT RESTRICTIONS, WE STILL

1186
00:31:19,876 --> 00:31:21,809
MANAGED TO HAVE SOME FUN.

1187
00:31:21,876 --> 00:31:22,676
WE INFILTRATED LOCAL NEWS

1188
00:31:22,743 --> 00:31:23,609
BROADCAST TO SELL A VAGINAL

1189
00:31:23,676 --> 00:31:25,176
HEALING BLANKET, WE SOLD 10,000

1190
00:31:25,243 --> 00:31:27,976
TEDDY BEARS

1191
00:31:28,043 --> 00:31:30,743
TO ANNOY EVOLUTION STRONGMAN,

1192
00:31:30,809 --> 00:31:32,043
WE ENTERED A DUCK STAMP CONTEST,

1193
00:31:32,109 --> 00:31:33,109
AND WE WERE ACTUALLY FUCKING

1194
00:31:33,176 --> 00:31:33,676
ROBBED ON THAT BY THE WAY.

1195
00:31:33,743 --> 00:31:34,276
WE STARTED OUR OWN HEALTH CARE

1196
00:31:34,343 --> 00:31:35,076
SHARING MINISTRY, WE FORCED A

1197
00:31:35,143 --> 00:31:36,209
MINNESOTA CAR DEALERSHIP TO

1198
00:31:36,276 --> 00:31:37,743
PRODUCE THE FINEST LOCAL CAR AD

1199
00:31:37,809 --> 00:31:39,509
THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN,

1200
00:31:39,576 --> 00:31:41,543
GEORGE CLOONEY APPEARED ON THE

1201
00:31:41,609 --> 00:31:42,976
SHOW EVERY TIME I SNAPPED MY

1202
00:31:43,043 --> 00:31:45,609
FINGERS, AND WE ALMOST WELCOMED

1203
00:31:45,676 --> 00:31:47,043
A VACCINE CICADA INTO OUR FAMILY

1204
00:31:47,109 --> 00:31:48,776
OF MASCOTS, WHICH WOULD HAVE

1205
00:31:48,843 --> 00:31:52,643
BEEN THE SINGLE DUMBEST THING

1206
00:31:52,709 --> 00:31:55,576
WE'VE EVER DONE.

1207
00:31:55,643 --> 00:31:57,343
WE ACTUALLY INVITED

1208
00:31:57,409 --> 00:31:58,876
THE VACCINE CICADA TO THE FINAL

1209
00:31:58,943 --> 00:32:00,276
SHOW TONIGHT IN A MAKE IT OR

1210
00:32:00,343 --> 00:32:00,709
BREAK IT SITUATION.

1211
00:32:00,776 --> 00:32:01,376
IF HE COULD DO A DANCE IN ALL

1212
00:32:01,443 --> 00:32:02,109
THE RIGHT WAYS, MAYBE HE

1213
00:32:02,176 --> 00:32:02,709
DESERVED TO BE HERE.

1214
00:32:02,776 --> 00:32:03,643
THEN WE REALIZED, HE DESERVED

1215
00:32:03,709 --> 00:32:05,143
SHIT.

1216
00:32:05,209 --> 00:32:06,709
HE'S A DOLLAR STORE BEETLE IN A

1217
00:32:06,776 --> 00:32:07,676
CROP TOP, SO WE SENT HIM A

1218
00:32:07,743 --> 00:32:08,876
TEXT TELLING HIM THE GIG IS OFF,

1219
00:32:08,943 --> 00:32:14,509
BUT HE PROBABLY CAN'T EVEN HOLD

1220
00:32:14,576 --> 00:32:15,443
A PHONE IN HIS -- WHAT ARE

1221
00:32:15,509 --> 00:32:15,976
THOSE?

1222
00:32:16,076 --> 00:32:16,909
PINCERS?

1223
00:32:16,976 --> 00:32:17,709
IDIOT.

1224
00:32:17,776 --> 00:32:18,809
LOOK, THE POINT IS, IT WAS

1225
00:32:18,876 --> 00:32:19,676
DEFINITELY A STRANGE YEAR, AND

1226
00:32:19,743 --> 00:32:21,109
DESPITE BEING BACK IN THE

1227
00:32:21,176 --> 00:32:22,676
STUDIO, THE FACT IS, I STILL

1228
00:32:22,743 --> 00:32:24,743
HAVEN'T SEEN MOST OF MY STAFF

1229
00:32:24,809 --> 00:32:26,909
SINCE MARCH OF 2020, AND THOUGH

1230
00:32:26,976 --> 00:32:28,609
I AM DEFINITELY LOOKING FORWARD

1231
00:32:28,676 --> 00:32:29,943
TO NEXT YEAR, THERE IS NO

1232
00:32:30,009 --> 00:32:30,909
QUESTION THAT IT HAS BEEN

1233
00:32:30,976 --> 00:32:31,943
DIFFICULT SPENDING SO MUCH OF

1234
00:32:32,009 --> 00:32:33,576
THIS ONE IN ISOLATION.

1235
00:32:33,643 --> 00:32:34,676
THE TRUTH IS, IT DOES SOMETIMES

1236
00:32:34,743 --> 00:32:36,876
GET ME DOWN A BIT.

1237
00:32:36,943 --> 00:32:38,276
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?

1238
00:32:38,343 --> 00:32:39,976
I THINK I ACTUALLY MIGHT KNOW

1239
00:32:40,043 --> 00:32:40,976
SOMEONE WHO COULD HELP ME FEEL A

1240
00:32:41,043 --> 00:32:42,276
LITTLE BIT BETTER.

1241
00:32:42,343 --> 00:32:43,576
[SNAPS]

1242
00:32:43,643 --> 00:32:46,176
>> HEY, JOHN, WHAT'S UP?

1243
00:32:46,243 --> 00:32:47,409
>> John: HEY, GEORGE, I WAS JUST

1244
00:32:47,476 --> 00:32:49,909
THINKING ABOUT ALL THE THINGS I

1245
00:32:49,976 --> 00:32:50,709
WANTED TO DO THIS YEAR AND

1246
00:32:50,776 --> 00:32:51,576
HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO DO AND THE

1247
00:32:51,643 --> 00:32:52,476
PEOPLE I WANTED TO SEE BUT

1248
00:32:52,543 --> 00:32:54,643
COULDN'T.

1249
00:32:54,709 --> 00:32:54,909
YOU KNOW?

1250
00:32:54,976 --> 00:32:55,709
>> YEAH.

1251
00:32:55,776 --> 00:32:56,676
>> John: YEAH.

1252
00:32:56,743 --> 00:32:57,509
>> FEELING DOWN, HMMM?

1253
00:32:57,576 --> 00:32:58,809
>> John: YEAH.

1254
00:32:58,876 --> 00:33:01,009
YOU COULD SAY IT'S AN

1255
00:33:01,076 --> 00:33:06,843
INTOLERABLE CRUELTY.

1256
00:33:06,909 --> 00:33:08,309
>> WHAT KIND OF REACTION DO YOU

1257
00:33:08,376 --> 00:33:09,243
WANT FROM ME ON THAT?

1258
00:33:09,309 --> 00:33:10,143
>> John: I WAS HOPING YOU MIGHT

1259
00:33:10,209 --> 00:33:12,243
BE ABLE TO CHEER ME UP A BIT.

1260
00:33:12,309 --> 00:33:15,109
>> YOU KNOW WHAT?

1261
00:33:15,176 --> 00:33:16,943
I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO DO THIS, BUT

1262
00:33:17,009 --> 00:33:17,709
YOU SEEM MORE PATHETIC THAN

1263
00:33:17,776 --> 00:33:18,409
USUAL.

1264
00:33:18,476 --> 00:33:19,443
>> John: THAT'S HARSH BUT ALSO

1265
00:33:19,509 --> 00:33:20,376
FAIR.

1266
00:33:20,443 --> 00:33:21,543
>> FOR THE NEXT FEW MINUTES, I'M

1267
00:33:21,609 --> 00:33:23,343
GOING TO GIVE YOU THE POWER TO

1268
00:33:23,409 --> 00:33:24,143
SUMMON ANY CELEBRITY WITH THAT

1269
00:33:24,209 --> 00:33:24,676
SNAP.

1270
00:33:24,743 --> 00:33:25,876
>> John: REALLY?

1271
00:33:25,943 --> 00:33:27,176
GEORGE, THAT IS ABSOLUTELY

1272
00:33:27,243 --> 00:33:28,709
FANTASTIC NEWS.

1273
00:33:28,776 --> 00:33:29,376
THANK YOU SO MUCH.

1274
00:33:29,443 --> 00:33:30,376
I PROMISE I WILL NOT MISUSE THIS

1275
00:33:30,443 --> 00:33:31,743
POWER.

1276
00:33:31,809 --> 00:33:33,043
>> YES, YOU WILL.

1277
00:33:33,109 --> 00:33:33,776
BUT THE BEAUTY IS, YOU ONLY HAVE

1278
00:33:33,843 --> 00:33:34,676
A FEW MINUTES.

1279
00:33:34,743 --> 00:33:35,476
SO GO.

1280
00:33:35,543 --> 00:33:40,209
[SNAPS]

1281
00:33:40,276 --> 00:33:41,876
>> John: I MEAN, THIS IS

1282
00:33:41,943 --> 00:33:42,076
GREAT.

1283
00:33:42,143 --> 00:33:42,709
THIS IS SO EXCITING.

1284
00:33:42,776 --> 00:33:43,509
I FEEL SLIGHTLY BETTER

1285
00:33:43,576 --> 00:33:44,443
ALREADY, BUT LET'S NOT WASTE ANY

1286
00:33:44,509 --> 00:33:45,076
TIME ON THIS, LET'S SEE WHO WE

1287
00:33:45,143 --> 00:33:45,576
GET FIRST.

1288
00:33:45,643 --> 00:33:47,509
[SNAPS]

1289
00:33:47,576 --> 00:33:49,176
OH, WOW, JENNIFER COOLIDGE.

1290
00:33:49,243 --> 00:33:50,943
JENNIFER, HI.

1291
00:33:51,009 --> 00:33:53,809
>> OH, LOOK, IT'S JIMMY KIMMEL.

1292
00:33:53,876 --> 00:33:54,943
>> John: NO, IT'S JOHN, MY NAME

1293
00:33:55,009 --> 00:33:55,809
IS JOHN.

1294
00:33:55,876 --> 00:34:00,709
>> JIMMY, I LOVE YOUR SHOW.

1295
00:34:00,776 --> 00:34:01,776
>> John: THANKS.

1296
00:34:01,843 --> 00:34:02,643
>> DO YOU WANT ME TO DO A MEAN

1297
00:34:02,709 --> 00:34:03,243
TWEET?

1298
00:34:03,309 --> 00:34:04,076
>> John: THAT'S A DIFFERENT

1299
00:34:04,143 --> 00:34:04,709
SHOW, JENNIFER.

1300
00:34:04,776 --> 00:34:05,476
>> OH.

1301
00:34:05,543 --> 00:34:06,843
IS QUESTLOVE THERE?

1302
00:34:06,909 --> 00:34:07,909
>> John: THAT'S A DIFFERENT

1303
00:34:07,976 --> 00:34:08,876
JIMMY.

1304
00:34:08,943 --> 00:34:10,909
>> OH!

1305
00:34:10,976 --> 00:34:13,276
WAIT, ARE YOU THE BRITISH ONE?

1306
00:34:13,343 --> 00:34:14,843
>> John: YES, THAT'S ME, I'M THE

1307
00:34:14,909 --> 00:34:18,509
BRITISH ONE.

1308
00:34:18,576 --> 00:34:19,209
YEAH, THAT'S ME.

1309
00:34:19,276 --> 00:34:19,843
>> DO YOU WANT ME TO GET IN THE

1310
00:34:19,909 --> 00:34:20,776
CAR AND SING?

1311
00:34:20,843 --> 00:34:21,843
>> John: OH, FOR FUCK'S SAKE.

1312
00:34:21,909 --> 00:34:22,643
[SNAPS]

1313
00:34:22,709 --> 00:34:25,543
HEY, WILL.

1314
00:34:25,609 --> 00:34:27,276
HOW ARE YOU DOING?

1315
00:34:27,343 --> 00:34:29,976
>> OH, HEY, JOHN.

1316
00:34:30,043 --> 00:34:30,409
WHAT NOW?

1317
00:34:30,476 --> 00:34:31,676
>> John: I'VE GOT A REALLY

1318
00:34:31,743 --> 00:34:32,376
FUNNY STORY FOR YOU.

1319
00:34:32,443 --> 00:34:33,043
GEORGE CLOONEY GAVE ME

1320
00:34:33,109 --> 00:34:33,709
THE POWER TO SUMMON ANYONE I

1321
00:34:33,776 --> 00:34:34,643
WANT WITH THE SNAP OF A FINGER.

1322
00:34:34,709 --> 00:34:37,243
>> HE DID THAT AGAIN?

1323
00:34:37,309 --> 00:34:38,143
HE GIVES THAT POWER TO ANYONE.

1324
00:34:38,209 --> 00:34:39,109
LAST WEEK I GOT SUMMONED BY A

1325
00:34:39,176 --> 00:34:40,209
GUY WHO GIVE CLOONEY A PACK OF

1326
00:34:40,276 --> 00:34:41,643
TRIDENT.

1327
00:34:41,709 --> 00:34:42,709
>> John: THAT MAKES ME FEEL

1328
00:34:42,776 --> 00:34:43,276
SIGNIFICANTLY LESS SPECIAL.

1329
00:34:43,343 --> 00:34:43,943
[SNAPS]

1330
00:34:44,009 --> 00:34:49,009
OH, RUPAUL!

1331
00:34:49,076 --> 00:34:50,276
>> I'M SORRY, MY DEAR, BUT IT'S

1332
00:34:50,343 --> 00:34:51,709
TIME FOR YOU TO SASHAY AWAY.

1333
00:34:51,776 --> 00:34:52,676
>> John: I'M NOT A CONTESTANT ON

1334
00:34:52,743 --> 00:34:57,543
YOUR SHOW.

1335
00:34:57,609 --> 00:34:59,343
IT'S ME, IT'S JOHN OLIVER.

1336
00:34:59,409 --> 00:34:59,709
HEY.

1337
00:34:59,776 --> 00:35:00,343
>> OH, GOSH.

1338
00:35:00,409 --> 00:35:01,243
I THOUGHT IT WAS ONE OF THE

1339
00:35:01,309 --> 00:35:02,043
QUEENS DRESSED UP AS A

1340
00:35:02,109 --> 00:35:02,809
MARIONETTE DOLL.

1341
00:35:02,876 --> 00:35:04,176
>> John: JUST ME IN MY ACTUAL

1342
00:35:04,243 --> 00:35:04,809
HUMAN BODY.

1343
00:35:04,876 --> 00:35:05,609
>> [LAUGHS]

1344
00:35:05,676 --> 00:35:08,143
CUTE.

1345
00:35:08,209 --> 00:35:12,009
[SNAPS]

1346
00:35:12,076 --> 00:35:13,743
>> John: THAT WAS FUN.

1347
00:35:13,809 --> 00:35:14,876
THAT WAS DEFINITELY FUN.

1348
00:35:14,943 --> 00:35:15,509
NO POINT IN STOPPING IF WE GOT

1349
00:35:15,576 --> 00:35:16,176
TIME.

1350
00:35:16,243 --> 00:35:17,176
LET'S SEE WHO ELSE WE CAN GET.

1351
00:35:17,243 --> 00:35:19,043
HOLY SHIT, CARDI B.

1352
00:35:19,109 --> 00:35:22,309
HEY, HEY, CARDI.

1353
00:35:22,376 --> 00:35:23,276
>> WHO SAID THAT?

1354
00:35:23,343 --> 00:35:24,576
>> John: I'M JOHN

1355
00:35:24,643 --> 00:35:25,676
>> ALEXA?

1356
00:35:25,743 --> 00:35:26,743
>> John: NOT ALEXA.

1357
00:35:26,809 --> 00:35:29,409
>> ALEXA?

1358
00:35:29,476 --> 00:35:30,409
>> John: IT'S LOVELY TO MEET

1359
00:35:30,476 --> 00:35:30,576
YOU.

1360
00:35:30,643 --> 00:35:31,309
I NEVER THOUGHT WE WOULD GET TO

1361
00:35:31,376 --> 00:35:33,343
SPEAK --

1362
00:35:33,409 --> 00:35:33,609
>> ALEXA?

1363
00:35:33,676 --> 00:35:34,909
>> John: FORGET IT.

1364
00:35:34,976 --> 00:35:35,609
[SNAPS]

1365
00:35:35,676 --> 00:35:36,409
>> SURPRISE!

1366
00:35:36,476 --> 00:35:37,909
LISTEN, YOUR LITTLE BROTHER

1367
00:35:37,976 --> 00:35:40,109
BILLY REACHED OUT TO ME AND TOLD

1368
00:35:40,176 --> 00:35:42,643
ME THAT IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY.

1369
00:35:42,709 --> 00:35:45,376
THIS IS FREAKING HUGE.

1370
00:35:45,443 --> 00:35:46,743
THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID.

1371
00:35:46,809 --> 00:35:47,543
>> John: BRIAN.

1372
00:35:47,609 --> 00:35:48,509
BRIAN.

1373
00:35:48,576 --> 00:35:49,476
SORRY, BRIAN.

1374
00:35:49,543 --> 00:35:53,276
>> HOLY SHIT.

1375
00:35:53,343 --> 00:35:54,543
>> John: YEAH.

1376
00:35:54,609 --> 00:35:56,009
>> THE CAMEOS NEVER TALK BACK.

1377
00:35:56,076 --> 00:35:57,109
>> John: BRIAN, I THINK THERE'S

1378
00:35:57,176 --> 00:35:57,843
BEEN A MISUNDERSTANDING, I NEVER

1379
00:35:57,909 --> 00:36:02,009
ORDERED A CAMEO, I JUST SNAP MY

1380
00:36:02,076 --> 00:36:02,909
FINGERS AND NOW WE'RE TALKING.

1381
00:36:02,976 --> 00:36:03,676
>> JOHN, IF THIS ISN'T A CAMEO,

1382
00:36:03,743 --> 00:36:05,309
JUST GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY

1383
00:36:05,376 --> 00:36:08,309
PHONE.

1384
00:36:08,376 --> 00:36:08,543
[SNAPS]

1385
00:36:08,609 --> 00:36:09,309
>> John: KEVIN FROM

1386
00:36:09,376 --> 00:36:10,309
"THE OFFICE" DOES NOT MESS

1387
00:36:10,376 --> 00:36:10,909
AROUND.

1388
00:36:10,976 --> 00:36:11,743
ALL RIGHT, ONE MORE PUSH.

1389
00:36:11,809 --> 00:36:12,209
HERE GOES.

1390
00:36:12,276 --> 00:36:14,776
[SNAPS]

1391
00:36:14,843 --> 00:36:15,543
OH, CARDI, IT'S ME AGAIN.

1392
00:36:15,609 --> 00:36:17,609
SORRY.

1393
00:36:17,676 --> 00:36:23,009
I'M SORRY.

1394
00:36:23,076 --> 00:36:24,276
>> ALEXA, STOP.

1395
00:36:24,343 --> 00:36:24,643
>> STOP HERE.

1396
00:36:24,709 --> 00:36:25,909
CHECK FOR DEVICES.

1397
00:36:25,976 --> 00:36:26,776
>> John: I'VE GOT IT, DON'T

1398
00:36:26,843 --> 00:36:28,776
WORRY.

1399
00:36:28,843 --> 00:36:29,009
[SNAPS]

1400
00:36:29,076 --> 00:36:29,776
OH, VOID, GREAT TO SEE.

1401
00:36:29,843 --> 00:36:30,743
>> DECENT TO SEE YOU AS WELL.

1402
00:36:30,809 --> 00:36:31,309
I CAN'T REALLY TALK AT THE

1403
00:36:31,376 --> 00:36:32,076
MOMENT, I'M HOSTING MY OWN

1404
00:36:32,143 --> 00:36:32,876
TALK SHOW NOW.

1405
00:36:32,943 --> 00:36:35,576
>> John: REALLY?

1406
00:36:35,643 --> 00:36:40,476
>> John: KIND OF BUSY.

1407
00:36:40,543 --> 00:36:42,076
APPARENTLY HBO MAX LIKED THE

1408
00:36:42,143 --> 00:36:42,976
VIBE OF THE SPACE AND THEY

1409
00:36:43,076 --> 00:36:43,609
THOUGHT IT WOULD BE BETTER

1410
00:36:43,676 --> 00:36:44,576
SUITED FOR A COMEDY SHOW AND

1411
00:36:44,643 --> 00:36:45,343
NOT, LIKE, WHAT YOU WERE DOING.

1412
00:36:45,409 --> 00:36:45,976
>> John: I GET IT, YOU'RE BEING

1413
00:36:46,043 --> 00:36:46,876
MEAN TO ME.

1414
00:36:46,943 --> 00:36:50,109
[SNAPS]

1415
00:36:50,176 --> 00:36:50,776
OH, THANK GOODNESS.

1416
00:36:50,843 --> 00:36:52,576
LESLIE, I'M SO GLAD IT'S YOU.

1417
00:36:52,643 --> 00:36:56,009
>> NAH.

1418
00:36:56,076 --> 00:36:57,043
>> John: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING

1419
00:36:57,109 --> 00:36:57,609
ABOUT, NO.

1420
00:36:57,676 --> 00:36:58,576
IT'S JOHN.

1421
00:36:58,643 --> 00:36:59,343
>> I DON'T WANT THIS.

1422
00:36:59,409 --> 00:37:00,543
I DON'T WANT TO BE PART OF THIS.

1423
00:37:00,609 --> 00:37:02,709
ALAKAZAM.

1424
00:37:02,776 --> 00:37:05,409
>> John: PART OF WHAT?

1425
00:37:05,476 --> 00:37:06,076
WE'RE JUST TALKING.

1426
00:37:06,143 --> 00:37:06,976
>> [CLAPPING]

1427
00:37:07,043 --> 00:37:07,809
>> John: DON'T CLAP ME AWAY.

1428
00:37:07,876 --> 00:37:08,643
>> GO AWAY.

1429
00:37:08,709 --> 00:37:09,609
ALAKAZAM.

1430
00:37:09,676 --> 00:37:10,776
>> John: JUST SNAP YOUR FINGERS.

1431
00:37:10,843 --> 00:37:12,209
>> WHITE MEN WON'T LEAVE, WHITE

1432
00:37:12,276 --> 00:37:14,643
MAN WON'T LEAVE!

1433
00:37:14,709 --> 00:37:16,443
>> John: I WILL, I'LL LEAVE!

1434
00:37:16,509 --> 00:37:17,143
[SNAPS]

1435
00:37:17,209 --> 00:37:21,609
>> TIME IS UP, HOW WAS IT, JOHN?

1436
00:37:21,676 --> 00:37:22,276
>> John: PEOPLE WERE KIND OF

1437
00:37:22,343 --> 00:37:24,676
MEAN TO ME, BUT HONESTLY, IT WAS

1438
00:37:24,743 --> 00:37:25,009
KIND OF GREAT.

1439
00:37:25,076 --> 00:37:25,576
>> I KNEW IT WOULD BE.

1440
00:37:25,643 --> 00:37:26,609
JUST BECAUSE THIS YEAR DIDN'T

1441
00:37:26,676 --> 00:37:27,209
WORK OUT LIKE YOU THOUGHT IT

1442
00:37:27,276 --> 00:37:28,343
WOULD, THAT DOESN'T MEAN THAT

1443
00:37:28,409 --> 00:37:29,176
SHAMELESSLY BRINGING IN

1444
00:37:29,243 --> 00:37:29,809
CELEBRITIES FOR THE FINALE WILL

1445
00:37:29,876 --> 00:37:30,943
CHEER YOU UP.

1446
00:37:31,009 --> 00:37:32,243
BECAUSE, SAY IT WITH ME...

1447
00:37:32,309 --> 00:37:33,743
>> CELEBRITIES MAKE EVERYTHING

1448
00:37:33,809 --> 00:37:35,509
BETTER EXCEPT IN THE MANY

1449
00:37:35,576 --> 00:37:40,343
SITUATIONS WHERE THEY DO NOT.

1450
00:37:40,409 --> 00:37:41,176
>> [LAUGHS]

1451
00:37:41,243 --> 00:37:42,009
>> THAT'S RIGHT.

1452
00:37:42,076 --> 00:37:43,276
JOHN, GOOD NIGHT, AND GOOD LUCK.

1453
00:37:43,343 --> 00:37:44,009
[SNAPS]

1454
00:37:44,076 --> 00:37:45,776
>> John: I MEAN, THAT'S IT.

1455
00:37:45,843 --> 00:37:47,476
I DO FEEL 20% BETTER NOW, AT

1456
00:37:47,543 --> 00:37:49,043
LEAST.

1457
00:37:49,109 --> 00:37:50,043
ANYWAY, THANK YOU SO MUCH

1458
00:37:50,109 --> 00:37:51,543
WATCHING OUR SHOW THIS YEAR.

1459
00:37:51,609 --> 00:37:52,276
WE ALL REALLY, REALLY APPRECIATE

1460
00:37:52,343 --> 00:37:54,243
IT.

1461
00:37:54,309 --> 00:37:58,176
WE'LL SEE YOU NEXT YEAR.

1462
00:37:58,243 --> 00:37:58,776
PLEASE STAY SAFE UNTIL THEN.

1463
00:37:58,843 --> 00:37:59,076
GOOD NIGHT.

1464
00:37:59,143 --> 00:37:59,943
[SNAPS]

1465
00:38:00,009 --> 00:38:00,976
>> DO YOU WANT ME TO GET IN THE

1466
00:38:01,043 --> 00:38:05,809
CAR AND SING?

1467
00:38:05,876 --> 00:38:06,776
♪ LA, LA, LA-LA ♪

1468
00:38:06,843 --> 00:38:12,143
♪ I'M A SMOOTH OPERATOR ♪

1469
00:38:12,209 --> 00:38:14,143
THANK YOU.

1470
00:38:14,209 --> 00:38:15,743
♪ AIN'T NO HOLLABACK GIRL,

1471
00:38:15,809 --> 00:38:17,576
AIN'T NO A HOLLABACK GIRL ♪

1472
00:38:17,643 --> 00:38:18,943
THANK YOU.

1473
00:38:19,009 --> 00:38:31,976
♪ ♪

1474
00:38:32,043 --> 00:38:33,009
>> HEY, EVERYBODY, WELCOME,

1475
00:38:33,076 --> 00:38:33,776
WELCOME, WELCOME, TO

1476
00:38:33,843 --> 00:38:34,976
"WHITE VOID TONIGHT."

1477
00:38:35,043 --> 00:38:38,176
I'M THE VOID.

1478
00:38:38,243 --> 00:38:38,776
LET'S DIVE STRAIGHT IN WITH

1479
00:38:38,843 --> 00:38:39,743
THE KEY QUESTION OF THE WEEK.

1480
00:38:39,809 --> 00:38:40,309
WHAT WENT WRONG WITH

1481
00:38:40,376 --> 00:38:44,909
"SPACE JAM 2"?

1482
00:38:44,976 --> 00:38:46,043
PEOPLE THINK THE MAIN FLAW WAS

1483
00:38:46,109 --> 00:38:46,609
LeBRON'S ACTING.

1484
00:38:46,676 --> 00:38:47,709
I THINK IT WAS ITS FUNDAMENTAL

1485
00:38:47,776 --> 00:38:48,376
MISUNDERSTANDING OF BUGS BUNNY

1486
00:38:48,443 --> 00:38:49,243
AS A CHARACTER.

1487
00:38:49,309 --> 00:38:50,443
I MEAN, THE CLIMAX INVOLVES

1488
00:38:50,509 --> 00:38:52,943
BUGS BUNNY LEARNING A LESSON?

1489
00:38:53,009 --> 00:38:54,409
BUGS BUNNY DOESN'T LEARN

1490
00:38:54,476 --> 00:38:56,909
LESSONS.

1491
00:38:56,976 --> 00:38:58,209
LET THOSE FUCKING NERDS AT PIXAR

1492
00:38:58,276 --> 00:39:02,409
LEARN LESSONS.

1493
00:39:02,476 --> 00:39:03,309
>> John: SORRY, IS YOUR ENTIRE

1494
00:39:03,376 --> 00:39:04,543
SHOW BREAKING DOWN YOUR PROBLEM

1495
00:39:04,609 --> 00:39:05,876
WITH "SPACE JAM 2"?

1496
00:39:05,943 --> 00:39:07,343
>> NO, THIS IS JUST THE FUN BIT

1497
00:39:07,409 --> 00:39:10,176
AT THE TOP OF THE SHOW, JOHN.

1498
00:39:10,243 --> 00:39:11,009
THERE IS ALSO A MAIN STORY

1499
00:39:11,076 --> 00:39:11,276
COMING UP.

1500
00:39:11,343 --> 00:39:12,643
>> John: JUST SEEMS LIKE A WEIRD

1501
00:39:12,709 --> 00:39:13,209
WAY TO START THE SHOW.

1502
00:39:13,276 --> 00:39:14,276
>> EXCUSE ME?

1503
00:39:14,343 --> 00:39:15,676
YOU ARE THE ONE WHO DOES

1504
00:39:15,743 --> 00:39:16,743
20-MINUTE MONOLOGUES ABOUT

1505
00:39:16,809 --> 00:39:18,109
FACTORY FARMING.

1506
00:39:18,176 --> 00:39:19,376
SO MAYBE TAKE A LOOK AT

1507
00:39:19,443 --> 00:39:20,543
YOURSELF.

1508
00:39:20,609 --> 00:39:23,676
>> John: HEY.

1509
00:39:23,743 --> 00:39:24,343
FAIR ENOUGH.

1510
00:39:24,409 --> 00:39:25,276
CARRY ON.

1511
00:39:25,343 --> 00:39:26,943
>> IF YOU DON'T MIND?

1512
00:39:27,009 --> 00:39:28,609
>> John: HAVE A GOOD SHOW.

1513
00:39:28,676 --> 00:39:29,343
>> BYE.

1514
00:39:29,409 --> 00:39:32,776
>> John: I'M LEAVING!

1515
00:39:32,843 --> 00:39:33,709
>> SORRY ABOUT THAT, FOLKS.

1516
00:39:33,776 --> 00:39:34,809
OUR MAIN STORY TONIGHT CONCERNS

1517
00:39:34,876 --> 00:39:37,743
JET FUEL...

1518
00:39:37,809 --> 00:39:38,709
>> John: OH OH, NO, DON'T.

1519
00:39:38,776 --> 00:39:39,443
>> SPECIFICALLY THE FACT...

1520
00:39:39,509 --> 00:39:40,309
>> John: NO.

1521
00:39:40,376 --> 00:39:41,409
>> THAT IT CAN'T MELT

1522
00:39:41,476 --> 00:39:43,643
STEEL BEAMS.