1 00:00:09,433 --> 00:00:16,433 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:16,500 --> 00:00:28,933 ♪ ♪ 3 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:29,666 >> John: HI THERE! 4 00:00:29,733 --> 00:00:30,300 WELCOME TO THE SHOW. 5 00:00:30,366 --> 00:00:30,933 STILL COMING TO YOU FROM THIS 6 00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:32,633 BLANK VOID. 7 00:00:32,700 --> 00:00:34,166 WE WERE OFF LAST WEEK, 8 00:00:34,233 --> 00:00:35,333 BUT INTERESTINGLY, IT SEEMS 9 00:00:35,400 --> 00:00:36,866 THE VOID WASN'T, BECAUSE 10 00:00:36,933 --> 00:00:38,233 "MORTAL KOMBAT" WAS RELEASED 11 00:00:38,300 --> 00:00:39,233 LAST WEEKEND, AND APPARENTLY, 12 00:00:39,300 --> 00:00:42,400 THIS HAPPENS: 13 00:00:42,466 --> 00:00:47,400 [LIGHTNING BOLTS STRIKE] 14 00:00:47,466 --> 00:00:49,466 >> WHERE ARE WE? 15 00:00:49,533 --> 00:00:52,300 >> WE ARE IN THE VOID. 16 00:00:52,366 --> 00:00:53,466 IT IS THE REALM BETWEEN YOUR 17 00:00:53,533 --> 00:00:54,400 WORLD AND MINE. 18 00:00:54,466 --> 00:00:55,966 >> John: WHAT THE FUCK? 19 00:00:56,033 --> 00:00:57,266 THE VOID IS TAKING OTHER JOBS 20 00:00:57,333 --> 00:00:59,833 NOW? 21 00:00:59,900 --> 00:01:01,100 ALTHOUGH IT'S CLEARLY BEEN 22 00:01:01,166 --> 00:01:02,400 THE BREAKOUT CHARACTER OF 23 00:01:02,466 --> 00:01:03,500 THIS SHOW IN THE LAST YEAR, 24 00:01:03,566 --> 00:01:05,100 SO I SHOULDN'T REALLY BE 25 00:01:05,166 --> 00:01:06,200 SURPRISED IT'S DOING CAMEOS 26 00:01:06,266 --> 00:01:09,966 ELSEWHERE ON HBO MAX. 27 00:01:10,033 --> 00:01:10,833 IT IS SO WHITE AND DEPRESSING, 28 00:01:10,900 --> 00:01:12,100 I GENUINELY CONFUSED IT FOR 29 00:01:12,166 --> 00:01:13,233 "MARE OF EASTTOWN." 30 00:01:13,300 --> 00:01:14,466 LOOK, IT'S BEEN ANOTHER 31 00:01:14,533 --> 00:01:16,133 CRAZY WEEK, FROM BIDEN MAKING 32 00:01:16,200 --> 00:01:16,966 HIS FIRST ADDRESS TO CONGRESS, 33 00:01:17,033 --> 00:01:18,766 TO THE NEWS THAT BORIS JOHNSON'S 34 00:01:18,833 --> 00:01:20,166 PHONE NUMBER HAS SOMEHOW BEEN 35 00:01:20,233 --> 00:01:21,366 AVAILABLE ONLINE FOR THE PAST 36 00:01:21,433 --> 00:01:23,100 15 YEARS, TO RUDY GIULIANI'S 37 00:01:23,166 --> 00:01:25,000 HOME BEING RAIDED BY THE FBI. 38 00:01:25,066 --> 00:01:26,266 AN EVENT I'M HONESTLY SURPRISED 39 00:01:26,333 --> 00:01:27,500 HE DIDN'T ACCIDENTALLY STREAM 40 00:01:27,566 --> 00:01:29,333 LIVE ON TWITCH BY SITTING 41 00:01:29,400 --> 00:01:30,433 ON HIS PHONE. 42 00:01:30,500 --> 00:01:31,866 BUT WE'RE ACTUALLY GOING TO DIVE 43 00:01:31,933 --> 00:01:33,366 STRAIGHT IN WITH OUR MAIN STORY 44 00:01:33,433 --> 00:01:34,233 TONIGHT, WHICH CONCERNS 45 00:01:34,300 --> 00:01:36,266 THE COVID VACCINES. 46 00:01:36,333 --> 00:01:37,100 THE END RESULT OF THE WORLD'S 47 00:01:37,166 --> 00:01:38,233 GREATEST SCIENTISTS WORKING 48 00:01:38,300 --> 00:01:39,300 AROUND THE CLOCK TO SAVE 49 00:01:39,366 --> 00:01:40,566 COUNTLESS LIVES, IMMORTALIZED 50 00:01:40,633 --> 00:01:41,666 IN A CARD WE'LL ALL DEFINITELY 51 00:01:41,733 --> 00:01:43,300 LOSE IN A MONTH. 52 00:01:43,366 --> 00:01:44,333 VITALLY IMPORTANT, BUT ALSO 53 00:01:44,400 --> 00:01:45,566 TOO BIG TO FIT IN ANY STANDARD 54 00:01:45,633 --> 00:01:47,200 WALLET? 55 00:01:47,266 --> 00:01:48,333 WAY TO FUMBLE AT THE ONE YARD 56 00:01:48,400 --> 00:01:50,133 LINE, SCIENCE. 57 00:01:50,200 --> 00:01:51,566 AND NOT THAT WE NEEDED IT, 58 00:01:51,633 --> 00:01:52,966 BUT THIS WEEK SAW YET ANOTHER 59 00:01:53,033 --> 00:01:54,300 REMINDER OF JUST HOW DANGEROUS 60 00:01:54,366 --> 00:01:55,766 COVID IS, WITH CASES IN INDIA 61 00:01:55,833 --> 00:01:57,266 IN PARTICULAR SURGING AT 62 00:01:57,333 --> 00:01:59,566 A TRULY TERRIFYING RATE. 63 00:01:59,633 --> 00:02:01,200 INDIA SET A WORLD RECORD 64 00:02:01,266 --> 00:02:03,733 FOR DAILY COVID CASES OF 65 00:02:03,800 --> 00:02:05,166 OVER 400,000, AND THAT IS 66 00:02:05,233 --> 00:02:07,500 PROBABLY AN UNDERCOUNT. 67 00:02:07,566 --> 00:02:09,200 AND OBVIOUSLY, THE WORLD 68 00:02:09,266 --> 00:02:10,266 SHOULD BE DOING EVERYTHING 69 00:02:10,333 --> 00:02:11,466 IT CAN TO HELP INDIA RIGHT NOW. 70 00:02:11,533 --> 00:02:13,233 BUT OUR BEST WAY OUT OF THIS 71 00:02:13,300 --> 00:02:14,666 MESS, LONG-TERM, IS CLEARLY 72 00:02:14,733 --> 00:02:16,766 VACCINES. 73 00:02:16,833 --> 00:02:18,133 AND IT'S WORTH REMEMBERING, 74 00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:19,933 WE IN THE U.S. ARE INCREDIBLY 75 00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:21,633 FORTUNATE -- WE CURRENTLY HAVE 76 00:02:21,700 --> 00:02:23,100 ACCESS TO A LOT OF VACCINES, 77 00:02:23,166 --> 00:02:24,300 AND MORE THAN HALF OF 78 00:02:24,366 --> 00:02:25,633 U.S. ADULTS HAVE NOW GOTTEN 79 00:02:25,700 --> 00:02:26,733 AT LEAST ONE DOSE, 80 00:02:26,800 --> 00:02:29,066 WHICH IS GREAT. 81 00:02:29,133 --> 00:02:30,700 THE BAD NEWS IS, SOME 82 00:02:30,766 --> 00:02:31,900 VACCINATION LOCATIONS HAVE 83 00:02:31,966 --> 00:02:33,000 ALREADY GONE FROM HAVING 84 00:02:33,066 --> 00:02:34,266 NOT ENOUGH SUPPLY TO 85 00:02:34,333 --> 00:02:35,966 NOT ENOUGH DEMAND. 86 00:02:36,033 --> 00:02:36,900 >> ACCORDING TO THE CDC, 87 00:02:36,966 --> 00:02:38,833 THE DAILY AVERAGE FOR 88 00:02:38,900 --> 00:02:40,166 VACCINATIONS HAS DROPPED 20% 89 00:02:40,233 --> 00:02:41,400 SINCE THE START OF THE MONTH. 90 00:02:41,466 --> 00:02:42,933 A WORRYING TREND. 91 00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:46,066 >> VACCINE DEMAND DECLINING IN 92 00:02:46,133 --> 00:02:47,200 SOUTH CAROLINA, SOME PROVIDERS 93 00:02:47,266 --> 00:02:48,300 LEFT WITH EXTRA DOSES AND 94 00:02:48,366 --> 00:02:49,433 APPOINTMENTS WIDE OPEN. 95 00:02:49,500 --> 00:02:51,066 >> PALM BEACH COUNTY HEALTHCARE 96 00:02:51,133 --> 00:02:52,800 DISTRICT SAYS IT IS NOW FACING 97 00:02:52,866 --> 00:02:54,433 10,000 APPOINTMENTS FOR THE 98 00:02:54,500 --> 00:02:55,600 COUNTY'S VACCINE SITES REMAIN 99 00:02:55,666 --> 00:02:56,766 UNFILLED SINCE THEY OPENED 100 00:02:56,833 --> 00:02:57,700 THIS WEEK. 101 00:02:57,766 --> 00:02:58,700 >> APPOINTMENTS ARE GOING 102 00:02:58,766 --> 00:02:59,733 UNFILLED. 103 00:02:59,800 --> 00:03:01,366 WE'VE GOT THOUSANDS OF 104 00:03:01,433 --> 00:03:02,433 APPOINTMENTS AVAILABLE OVER 105 00:03:02,500 --> 00:03:03,266 THE NEXT FEW WEEKS AND -- AND 106 00:03:03,333 --> 00:03:06,866 NO TAKERS AT THIS POINT. 107 00:03:06,933 --> 00:03:07,433 >> John: IT'S TRUE. 108 00:03:07,500 --> 00:03:08,666 A WORRYING AMOUNT 109 00:03:08,733 --> 00:03:09,666 OF PEOPLE ARE HOLDING OFF ON 110 00:03:09,733 --> 00:03:10,500 GETTING THE FREE COVID VACCINE. 111 00:03:10,566 --> 00:03:11,466 AND I'M NOT SAYING YOU SHOULD 112 00:03:11,533 --> 00:03:12,300 IMMEDIATELY GET SOMETHING JUST 113 00:03:12,366 --> 00:03:13,000 BECAUSE IT'S FREE. 114 00:03:13,066 --> 00:03:14,166 I WOULDN'T RECOMMEND GETTING 115 00:03:14,233 --> 00:03:14,800 THESE OLD DOLLS ON CRAIGSLIST 116 00:03:14,866 --> 00:03:16,500 JUST BECAUSE THEY'RE FREE. 117 00:03:16,566 --> 00:03:18,700 THEY'RE WEIRD, BROKEN, AND 118 00:03:18,766 --> 00:03:20,800 WILL KILL YOU IN YOUR SLEEP. 119 00:03:20,866 --> 00:03:22,400 BUT THESE VACCINES COULD SAVE 120 00:03:22,466 --> 00:03:23,966 NOT JUST YOUR LIFE, BUT THE 121 00:03:24,033 --> 00:03:25,000 LIVES OF PEOPLE AROUND YOU. 122 00:03:25,066 --> 00:03:26,533 AND IT'S GENUINELY DISPIRITING 123 00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:27,966 THAT JUST A FEW MONTHS INTO 124 00:03:28,033 --> 00:03:29,400 THE VACCINE ROLLOUT, 125 00:03:29,466 --> 00:03:30,466 WE'RE ALREADY AT THIS POINT. 126 00:03:30,533 --> 00:03:32,366 AND THE PROBLEM IS, FOR THE 127 00:03:32,433 --> 00:03:33,566 CORONAVIRUS, THE "HERD IMMUNITY 128 00:03:33,633 --> 00:03:35,433 THRESHOLD" IS THOUGHT TO BE 129 00:03:35,500 --> 00:03:36,766 BETWEEN 70 AND 90% OF THE 130 00:03:36,833 --> 00:03:38,366 POPULATION. 131 00:03:38,433 --> 00:03:41,000 BUT A SURVEY FOUND THAT WHILE 132 00:03:41,066 --> 00:03:42,066 60% OF AMERICAN ADULTS HAVE GOT, 133 00:03:42,133 --> 00:03:45,966 OR WANT TO GET, THE VACCINE, 134 00:03:46,033 --> 00:03:47,133 ANOTHER 18% SAY "MAYBE," AND 22% 135 00:03:47,200 --> 00:03:48,766 SAY "NO." 136 00:03:48,833 --> 00:03:50,966 AND IF YOU'RE THINKING, 137 00:03:51,033 --> 00:03:53,200 "WELL, IF EVERY "MAYBE" GETS 138 00:03:53,266 --> 00:03:54,400 THE VACCINE, THAT PUTS US AT 139 00:03:54,466 --> 00:03:55,533 78%!" 140 00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:57,433 UNFORTUNATELY, THAT POLL DOESN'T 141 00:03:57,500 --> 00:03:59,000 TAKE INTO ACCOUNT CHILDREN, WHO 142 00:03:59,066 --> 00:04:00,300 WE'RE NOT VACCINATING RIGHT NOW, 143 00:04:00,366 --> 00:04:01,600 AND WHO MAKE UP AROUND 22% 144 00:04:01,666 --> 00:04:04,033 OF THE POPULATION. 145 00:04:04,100 --> 00:04:05,533 SO WE NEED TO GET THE VACCINE 146 00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:07,733 IN AS MANY ADULTS AS POSSIBLE, 147 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:09,966 AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. 148 00:04:10,033 --> 00:04:10,800 AND THAT MEANS YOU REALLY NEED 149 00:04:10,866 --> 00:04:12,700 TO GET VACCINATED. 150 00:04:12,766 --> 00:04:13,866 AND OBVIOUSLY, I MEAN 151 00:04:13,933 --> 00:04:14,666 THE COLLECTIVE "YOU," BUT ALSO 152 00:04:14,733 --> 00:04:16,200 YOU, MIKE. 153 00:04:16,266 --> 00:04:17,700 MIKE IN BALTIMORE. 154 00:04:17,766 --> 00:04:18,600 I KNOW YOU'VE GOT THIS ON IN 155 00:04:18,666 --> 00:04:19,666 THE BACKGROUND AT WORK 156 00:04:19,733 --> 00:04:21,400 ON MONDAY, SO LISTEN TO ME. 157 00:04:21,466 --> 00:04:22,566 SCHEDULE YOUR VACCINE, MIKE. 158 00:04:22,633 --> 00:04:23,566 DON'T SAY YOU'RE GONNA 159 00:04:23,633 --> 00:04:24,833 "LOOK INTO IT LATER." 160 00:04:24,900 --> 00:04:26,700 JUST GOOGLE "VACCINE FINDER 161 00:04:26,766 --> 00:04:28,400 BALTIMORE," IT TAKES SECONDS. 162 00:04:28,466 --> 00:04:29,500 HERE ARE A LIST OF VACCINE SITES 163 00:04:29,566 --> 00:04:30,800 IN YOUR AREA. 164 00:04:30,866 --> 00:04:32,300 AND IF YOU'RE THINKING, 165 00:04:32,366 --> 00:04:33,533 "EHH, I'M NOT SURE I NEED IT, 166 00:04:33,600 --> 00:04:34,666 JOE ROGAN SAYS I'M PROBABLY 167 00:04:34,733 --> 00:04:38,066 FINE." 168 00:04:38,133 --> 00:04:39,100 LOOK, IT'S TRUE, YOU MIGHT NOT 169 00:04:39,166 --> 00:04:41,300 GET SERIOUSLY SICK FROM COVID -- 170 00:04:41,366 --> 00:04:42,366 OR SICK AT ALL -- YOU COULD 171 00:04:42,433 --> 00:04:44,000 STILL INADVERTENTLY PASS IT TO 172 00:04:44,066 --> 00:04:45,500 SOMEONE, WHO COULD THEN DIE. 173 00:04:45,566 --> 00:04:46,833 AND BEFORE YOU SAY, "WELL, 174 00:04:46,900 --> 00:04:48,700 VULNERABLE PEOPLE SHOULD JUST 175 00:04:48,766 --> 00:04:49,633 GET VACCINATED, THEN" -- THE 176 00:04:49,700 --> 00:04:50,800 VACCINES ARE ONLY 95% EFFECTIVE, 177 00:04:50,866 --> 00:04:51,600 MIKE. 178 00:04:51,666 --> 00:04:52,833 SO THEY'LL PROBABLY BE OKAY, 179 00:04:52,900 --> 00:04:54,266 BUT MAYBE NOT. 180 00:04:54,333 --> 00:04:55,533 ALSO, THE MORE THE VIRUS 181 00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:57,033 CIRCULATES, THE LIKELIER WE'LL 182 00:04:57,100 --> 00:04:58,000 SEE MUTATIONS THAT MAKE IT MORE 183 00:04:58,066 --> 00:04:59,833 DANGEROUS, POSSIBLY HELPING IT 184 00:04:59,900 --> 00:05:01,433 TO EVADE THE VACCINE COMPLETELY, 185 00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:02,666 PUTTING US BACK AT SQUARE ONE. 186 00:05:02,733 --> 00:05:04,100 SO GET THE FUCKING VACCINE, 187 00:05:04,166 --> 00:05:06,166 MIKE! 188 00:05:06,233 --> 00:05:08,000 THE POINT IS, THERE IS 189 00:05:08,066 --> 00:05:09,333 A PROBLEMATIC AMOUNT OF 190 00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:10,733 VACCINE HESITANCY RIGHT NOW, 191 00:05:10,800 --> 00:05:12,866 EVEN AMONG PEOPLE WHO YOU'D 192 00:05:12,933 --> 00:05:13,700 REALLY LIKE TO THINK WOULD NOT 193 00:05:13,766 --> 00:05:14,933 NEED CONVINCING. 194 00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:16,433 >> WE MET ROBERT GANNON BEFORE 195 00:05:16,500 --> 00:05:17,900 HE WENT IN TO VISIT HIS 196 00:05:17,966 --> 00:05:19,400 77-YEAR-OLD MOTHER, KIYA, WHO 197 00:05:19,466 --> 00:05:21,100 WAS ON A VENTILATOR RIGHT NOW IN 198 00:05:21,166 --> 00:05:23,466 THE ICU DUE TO COVID. 199 00:05:23,533 --> 00:05:24,766 >> HAD SHE BEEN VACCINATED? 200 00:05:24,833 --> 00:05:26,200 >> SHE WAS NOT VACCINATED. 201 00:05:26,266 --> 00:05:27,666 I THINK SHE WAS BEING HESITANT, 202 00:05:27,733 --> 00:05:28,266 JUST WANTING TO SEE HOW THINGS 203 00:05:28,333 --> 00:05:29,133 PLAYED OUT. 204 00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:31,533 >> HAVE YOU BEEN VACCINATED? 205 00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:31,866 >> I HAVE NOT. 206 00:05:31,933 --> 00:05:33,266 >> WHAT WOULD IT TAKE FOR YOU TO 207 00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:34,800 GET VACCINATED? 208 00:05:34,866 --> 00:05:37,000 >> MMM... 209 00:05:37,066 --> 00:05:37,700 I'D WANT TO MAKE SURE THAT IT'S 210 00:05:37,766 --> 00:05:38,533 SAFE. 211 00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:42,000 >> John: WOW. 212 00:05:42,066 --> 00:05:43,033 THERE IS PERHAPS NO CLEARER SIGN 213 00:05:43,100 --> 00:05:44,466 OF JUST HOW DEEP VACCINE 214 00:05:44,533 --> 00:05:45,733 HESITANCY RUNS THAN SOMEONE 215 00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:46,800 IN THAT GUY'S POSITION STILL 216 00:05:46,866 --> 00:05:49,400 QUESTIONING WHETHER TO GET IT. 217 00:05:49,466 --> 00:05:50,633 INSTEAD OF ASKING, "IS THERE 218 00:05:50,700 --> 00:05:51,400 SUCH A THING AS TOO MUCH 219 00:05:51,466 --> 00:05:52,133 VACCINE? 220 00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:54,833 BECAUSE IF NOT, I'M GOING BACK 221 00:05:54,900 --> 00:05:56,133 FOR INJECTIONS UNTIL I'M AROUND 222 00:05:56,200 --> 00:05:57,833 80% PFIZER." 223 00:05:57,900 --> 00:05:59,833 SO GIVEN ALL OF THAT, TONIGHT, 224 00:05:59,900 --> 00:06:01,100 LET'S TALK ABOUT THE COVID 225 00:06:01,166 --> 00:06:03,033 VACCINES -- WHY PEOPLE ARE 226 00:06:03,100 --> 00:06:04,866 HESITANT, WHAT THEIR WORRIES 227 00:06:04,933 --> 00:06:05,700 ARE, AND HOW THEY MIGHT BE 228 00:06:05,766 --> 00:06:07,433 REASSURED. 229 00:06:07,500 --> 00:06:08,633 AND LET'S START WITH THE FACT 230 00:06:08,700 --> 00:06:09,833 YOU CAN'T CHARACTERIZE ANY ONE 231 00:06:09,900 --> 00:06:11,033 GROUP AS UNIFORMLY 232 00:06:11,100 --> 00:06:12,600 VACCINE-HESITANT. 233 00:06:12,666 --> 00:06:15,100 NO DEMOGRAPHIC IS A MONOLITH. 234 00:06:15,166 --> 00:06:16,333 EVERY GROUP WILL HAVE SOME WHO 235 00:06:16,400 --> 00:06:17,633 ARE EXCITED, AND OTHERS WHO ARE 236 00:06:17,700 --> 00:06:18,800 ANXIOUS. 237 00:06:18,866 --> 00:06:20,100 AND DIFFERENT GROUPS WILL BE 238 00:06:20,166 --> 00:06:21,133 ANXIOUS FOR DIFFERENT REASONS. 239 00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:21,966 FOR INSTANCE, EARLY ON, 240 00:06:22,033 --> 00:06:22,733 YOU PROBABLY HEARD A LOT ABOUT 241 00:06:22,800 --> 00:06:23,500 HESITANCY AMONG SOME 242 00:06:23,566 --> 00:06:24,933 BLACK AMERICANS. 243 00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:26,100 WHICH CAN BE A REAL THING -- 244 00:06:26,166 --> 00:06:27,600 EVEN THIS PEDIATRICIAN HAD 245 00:06:27,666 --> 00:06:29,533 RESERVATIONS. 246 00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:30,966 >> WHEN THE VACCINE WAS FIRST 247 00:06:31,033 --> 00:06:32,366 MADE AVAILABLE TO BOTH OF YOU, 248 00:06:32,433 --> 00:06:33,233 DID YOU BOTH JUMP AT THE CHANCE 249 00:06:33,300 --> 00:06:34,166 TO GET IT? 250 00:06:34,233 --> 00:06:37,166 >> NO. 251 00:06:37,233 --> 00:06:38,000 NO. 252 00:06:38,066 --> 00:06:40,166 I MEAN, NOT ME ANYWAY. 253 00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:42,433 I AM BLACK FIRST IN THIS 254 00:06:42,500 --> 00:06:44,666 COUNTRY, AND THAT HAS WITH IT 255 00:06:44,733 --> 00:06:46,266 A LOT OF BAGGAGE, TO TELL YOU 256 00:06:46,333 --> 00:06:47,266 THE TRUTH. 257 00:06:47,333 --> 00:06:48,866 AND SO, TO MY PUBLIC HEALTH 258 00:06:48,933 --> 00:06:50,066 DEGREE, THE CULMINATING 259 00:06:50,133 --> 00:06:51,233 EXPERIENCE THAT I DID WAS 260 00:06:51,300 --> 00:06:54,100 RELATED TO THE RELATIONSHIP 261 00:06:54,166 --> 00:06:56,033 BETWEEN BLACK PEOPLE AND 262 00:06:56,100 --> 00:06:57,133 PHYSICIANS. 263 00:06:57,200 --> 00:06:58,300 AND THAT RELATIONSHIP HAS BEEN 264 00:06:58,366 --> 00:07:01,200 A CANTANKEROUS ONE. 265 00:07:01,266 --> 00:07:02,666 AND SO THOSE ARE THE KINDS OF 266 00:07:02,733 --> 00:07:04,033 THINGS THAT ARE DEEPLY EMBEDDED 267 00:07:04,100 --> 00:07:05,233 AND CHALLENGING TO OVERCOME, 268 00:07:05,300 --> 00:07:05,766 EVEN WITHIN SOMEONE WHO'S 269 00:07:05,833 --> 00:07:07,300 A SCIENTIST. 270 00:07:07,366 --> 00:07:08,033 >> John: HONESTLY, I DO 271 00:07:08,100 --> 00:07:09,466 UNDERSTAND THAT. 272 00:07:09,533 --> 00:07:10,900 WE'VE TALKED BEFORE ABOUT 273 00:07:10,966 --> 00:07:12,466 THE FRAUGHT RELATIONSHIP 274 00:07:12,533 --> 00:07:13,300 BLACK AMERICANS HAVE WITH 275 00:07:13,366 --> 00:07:14,700 HEALTH CARE, BASED ON BOTH 276 00:07:14,766 --> 00:07:16,700 CURRENT BAD EXPERIENCES, 277 00:07:16,766 --> 00:07:17,800 AND THE HISTORY OF INCIDENTS 278 00:07:17,866 --> 00:07:19,766 LIKE THE TUSKEGEE EXPERIMENT, 279 00:07:19,833 --> 00:07:20,833 WHERE DOCTORS LIED TO BLACK MEN, 280 00:07:20,900 --> 00:07:22,300 ALLOWING THEM TO SUFFER FROM 281 00:07:22,366 --> 00:07:24,233 UNTREATED SYPHILIS OVER DECADES. 282 00:07:24,300 --> 00:07:25,300 OR, AS MOST U.S. HISTORY 283 00:07:25,366 --> 00:07:27,100 STUDENTS WOULD DESCRIBE IT: 284 00:07:27,166 --> 00:07:30,233 "SOMETHING I HAVE NOT HEARD OF." 285 00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:30,933 ALTHOUGH IT FEELS IMPORTANT TO 286 00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:32,233 MENTION THAT THAT DOCTOR DID 287 00:07:32,300 --> 00:07:33,900 WIND UP GETTING THE VACCINE. 288 00:07:33,966 --> 00:07:34,900 AND, IN GENERAL, BLACK VACCINE 289 00:07:34,966 --> 00:07:37,266 HESITANCY HAS DROPPED FAST. 290 00:07:37,333 --> 00:07:38,833 ANOTHER GROUP YOU MIGHT HAVE 291 00:07:38,900 --> 00:07:40,200 HEARD HAVE HIGH HESITANCY RATES 292 00:07:40,266 --> 00:07:42,733 ARE REPUBLICANS, AND THAT'S 293 00:07:42,800 --> 00:07:43,966 ALSO TRUE. 294 00:07:44,033 --> 00:07:45,200 AROUND 30% OF REPUBLICANS SAY 295 00:07:45,266 --> 00:07:46,300 THEY WON'T GET IT. 296 00:07:46,366 --> 00:07:48,566 AND IT'S NOT HARD TO SEE WHY -- 297 00:07:48,633 --> 00:07:49,700 FEARS AND DOUBTS ABOUT THE 298 00:07:49,766 --> 00:07:51,933 VACCINE HAVE FLOWN AROUND 299 00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:53,366 CONSERVATIVE MEDIA, WITH ONE OF 300 00:07:53,433 --> 00:07:54,566 THE MOST PROMINENT 301 00:07:54,633 --> 00:07:56,200 SUPERSPREADERS BEING THIS GUY. 302 00:07:56,266 --> 00:07:58,200 >> WHAT ABOUT THIS VACCINE? 303 00:07:58,266 --> 00:08:00,600 WHY ARE AMERICANS BEING 304 00:08:00,666 --> 00:08:01,500 DISCOURAGED FROM ASKING SIMPLE, 305 00:08:01,566 --> 00:08:02,333 STRAIGHTFORWARD QUESTIONS ABOUT 306 00:08:02,400 --> 00:08:03,866 IT? 307 00:08:03,933 --> 00:08:05,133 QUESTIONS LIKE, HOW EFFECTIVE 308 00:08:05,200 --> 00:08:05,900 ARE THESE DRUGS? 309 00:08:05,966 --> 00:08:06,866 ARE THEY SAFE? 310 00:08:06,933 --> 00:08:08,566 DO YOU NEED A REASON TO TURN 311 00:08:08,633 --> 00:08:10,433 DOWN THE VACCINE? 312 00:08:10,500 --> 00:08:11,166 AND WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU DO 313 00:08:11,233 --> 00:08:12,166 TURN IT DOWN? 314 00:08:12,233 --> 00:08:12,866 WILL YOU BE ALLOWED TO FLY ON 315 00:08:12,933 --> 00:08:13,966 AIRPLANES? 316 00:08:14,033 --> 00:08:15,066 OR GO TO WORK? 317 00:08:15,133 --> 00:08:15,966 OR ENTER THE FRONT DOORS OF 318 00:08:16,033 --> 00:08:17,733 MADISON SQUARE GARDEN? 319 00:08:17,800 --> 00:08:19,300 OH, NOW THEY'RE TELLING US 320 00:08:19,366 --> 00:08:22,933 THE VACCINE HAS A DELAYED 321 00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:24,866 RESPONSE. 322 00:08:24,933 --> 00:08:25,466 OKAY, DELAYED BY HOW LONG? 323 00:08:25,533 --> 00:08:26,933 THEY DON'T SAY. 324 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:29,066 IF VACCINES WORK, WHY ARE 325 00:08:29,133 --> 00:08:30,200 VACCINATED PEOPLE STILL BANNED 326 00:08:30,266 --> 00:08:31,200 FROM LIVING NORMAL LIVES? 327 00:08:31,266 --> 00:08:31,833 HONESTLY, WHAT'S THE ANSWER TO 328 00:08:31,900 --> 00:08:33,600 THAT? 329 00:08:33,666 --> 00:08:34,733 SO MAYBE IT DOESN'T WORK AND 330 00:08:34,800 --> 00:08:35,500 THEY'RE SIMPLY NOT TELLING YOU 331 00:08:35,566 --> 00:08:37,000 THAT. 332 00:08:37,066 --> 00:08:38,300 WELL, YOU HATE TO THINK THAT, 333 00:08:38,366 --> 00:08:39,566 ESPECIALLY IF YOU'VE GOTTEN 334 00:08:39,633 --> 00:08:41,266 TWO SHOTS, BUT WHAT'S THE OTHER 335 00:08:41,333 --> 00:08:43,833 POTENTIAL EXPLANATION? 336 00:08:43,900 --> 00:08:45,400 >> John: OKAY, IT'S GENUINELY 337 00:08:45,466 --> 00:08:46,766 WEIRD TO SEE SOMEONE HOSTING A 338 00:08:46,833 --> 00:08:48,866 SHOW ON A SUPPOSED NEWS NETWORK, 339 00:08:48,933 --> 00:08:49,500 AND ENDING EVERY SENTENCE WITH 340 00:08:49,566 --> 00:08:51,100 A QUESTION MARK. 341 00:08:51,166 --> 00:08:52,766 ESPECIALLY WHEN ANSWERS TO MOST 342 00:08:52,833 --> 00:08:54,266 OF THOSE QUESTIONS ARE OUT THERE 343 00:08:54,333 --> 00:08:55,966 FOR ANYONE WHO CARES TO KNOW. 344 00:08:56,033 --> 00:08:57,466 SO, FOR INSTANCE, THAT LAST 345 00:08:57,533 --> 00:08:58,900 COMPLAINT THAT THE CDC STILL 346 00:08:58,966 --> 00:09:00,433 RECOMMENDS WEARING MASKS INDOORS 347 00:09:00,500 --> 00:09:01,800 WHEN AROUND VULNERABLE 348 00:09:01,866 --> 00:09:03,300 UNVACCINATED PEOPLE DOES NOT 349 00:09:03,366 --> 00:09:05,333 MEAN THE VACCINE DOESN'T WORK. 350 00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:07,300 CLINICAL TRIALS FOUND THAT 351 00:09:07,366 --> 00:09:09,066 VACCINES ARE SPECTACULARLY 352 00:09:09,133 --> 00:09:10,166 SUCCESSFUL AT PREVENTING PEOPLE 353 00:09:10,233 --> 00:09:12,133 FROM GETTING SERIOUS DISEASE. 354 00:09:12,200 --> 00:09:13,600 AS FOR WHETHER THEY PROTECT 355 00:09:13,666 --> 00:09:14,933 YOU FROM SPREADING THE VIRUS, 356 00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:16,466 THE TRIALS WEREN'T DESIGNED TO 357 00:09:16,533 --> 00:09:17,300 ASSESS THAT. 358 00:09:17,366 --> 00:09:18,766 BUT EVIDENCE SO FAR INDICATES 359 00:09:18,833 --> 00:09:19,866 THEY DRASTICALLY REDUCE 360 00:09:19,933 --> 00:09:21,700 TRANSMISSION. 361 00:09:21,766 --> 00:09:23,200 THE REASON WE STILL SEE MASK AND 362 00:09:23,266 --> 00:09:24,600 DISTANCING RECOMMENDATIONS IS 363 00:09:24,666 --> 00:09:27,233 THAT THE CDC IS BEING CAUTIOUS, 364 00:09:27,300 --> 00:09:29,166 AND WANTS TO BE SURE IT'S NOT 365 00:09:29,233 --> 00:09:30,600 SPREADING BULLSHIT AROUND 366 00:09:30,666 --> 00:09:32,566 DURING A GLOBAL PANDEMIC 367 00:09:32,633 --> 00:09:34,000 LIKE A FROZEN DINNER DUKE 368 00:09:34,066 --> 00:09:35,733 WITH A TV SHOW. 369 00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:37,166 ANYWAY, I HOPE THAT ANSWERS AT 370 00:09:37,233 --> 00:09:39,933 LEAST ONE OF YOUR GAPE-MOUTHED 371 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:41,000 BAD-FAITH WONDERINGS, YOU 372 00:09:41,066 --> 00:09:42,633 SCRUNCH-FACED FEAR-BABOON. 373 00:09:42,700 --> 00:09:44,000 AND THE PROBLEM IS, WHEN PEOPLE 374 00:09:44,066 --> 00:09:45,400 LIKE TUCKER "RAISE QUESTIONS" 375 00:09:45,466 --> 00:09:46,566 WITHOUT BOTHERING TO ANSWER 376 00:09:46,633 --> 00:09:47,900 THEM, THERE'S A LOT OF 377 00:09:47,966 --> 00:09:49,633 MISINFORMATION OUT THERE FOR 378 00:09:49,700 --> 00:09:51,400 PEOPLE TO THEN STUMBLE ON. 379 00:09:51,466 --> 00:09:52,966 ANTI-VACCINE GROUPS HAVE BEEN 380 00:09:53,033 --> 00:09:54,866 WAITING FOR A MOMENT LIKE THIS 381 00:09:54,933 --> 00:09:57,100 TO SPREAD DOUBT, AND THE SCARY 382 00:09:57,166 --> 00:09:58,166 THING IS, THEY DON'T ACTUALLY 383 00:09:58,233 --> 00:09:58,966 NEED TO CONVINCE PEOPLE THEY'RE 384 00:09:59,033 --> 00:10:00,200 RIGHT. 385 00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:01,433 THEY JUST NEED TO CONVINCE 386 00:10:01,500 --> 00:10:03,433 PEOPLE THAT NO ONE IS. 387 00:10:03,500 --> 00:10:04,700 AND THAT TRACKS WITH RECENT 388 00:10:04,766 --> 00:10:06,333 POLLING. 389 00:10:06,400 --> 00:10:08,166 WHILE FEW BELIEVE SPECIFIC MYTHS 390 00:10:08,233 --> 00:10:10,166 ABOUT THE VACCINE, LARGER 391 00:10:10,233 --> 00:10:11,866 NUMBERS SAID THEY DIDN'T KNOW 392 00:10:11,933 --> 00:10:13,833 WHETHER PARTICULAR MYTHS WERE 393 00:10:13,900 --> 00:10:15,333 TRUE OR FALSE. 394 00:10:15,400 --> 00:10:16,966 FOR INSTANCE, ONLY 4% OF PEOPLE 395 00:10:17,033 --> 00:10:18,033 BELIEVE THE COVID VACCINE IS 396 00:10:18,100 --> 00:10:20,433 MORE DEADLY THAN THE DISEASE, 397 00:10:20,500 --> 00:10:28,600 BUT 25% SAY THEY DON'T KNOW. 398 00:10:28,666 --> 00:10:29,333 AND THAT IS NOT GOOD. 399 00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:29,600 FLASHBACK 400 00:10:29,666 --> 00:10:30,433 BECAUSE IF ANTI-VAXXERS 401 00:10:30,500 --> 00:10:31,266 CAN SIMPLY SPREAD ENOUGH 402 00:10:31,333 --> 00:10:32,433 MISINFORMATION TO CAUSE PEOPLE 403 00:10:32,500 --> 00:10:33,566 TO THROW UP THEIR HANDS AND SAY, 404 00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:34,566 "I JUST DON'T KNOW ENOUGH TO GET 405 00:10:34,633 --> 00:10:36,033 THE SHOT," THEY'VE ALREADY 406 00:10:36,100 --> 00:10:36,800 SERIOUSLY FUCKED THINGS UP FOR 407 00:10:36,866 --> 00:10:39,766 ALL OF US. 408 00:10:39,833 --> 00:10:41,100 AND TO BE CLEAR, MOST PEOPLE WHO 409 00:10:41,166 --> 00:10:42,000 ARE HESITANT ARE NOT FANATICS OR 410 00:10:42,066 --> 00:10:43,333 CONSPIRACY THEORISTS. 411 00:10:43,400 --> 00:10:45,100 MANY ARE JUST TRYING TO MAKE 412 00:10:45,166 --> 00:10:47,966 THE BEST DECISION FOR THEMSELVES 413 00:10:48,033 --> 00:10:49,233 AND THEIR FAMILY, LIKE THAT 414 00:10:49,300 --> 00:10:50,466 PEDIATRICIAN WE SAW EARLIER. 415 00:10:50,533 --> 00:10:51,466 YOU DEFINITELY KNOW PEOPLE 416 00:10:51,533 --> 00:10:53,700 LIKE THAT IN YOUR LIFE. 417 00:10:53,766 --> 00:10:55,166 SO I'M ACTUALLY GOING TO SPEND 418 00:10:55,233 --> 00:10:57,000 THE REST OF THIS PIECE TRYING TO 419 00:10:57,066 --> 00:10:57,766 CLEAR UP SOME OF THE BIGGEST 420 00:10:57,833 --> 00:10:58,900 MYTHS FLYING AROUND. 421 00:10:58,966 --> 00:11:00,733 AND SOME ARE EASY TO DEBUNK 422 00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:01,900 QUICKLY, LIKE THE CLAIMS THAT 423 00:11:01,966 --> 00:11:03,733 BILL GATES IS USING THE VACCINE 424 00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:05,666 TO PUT A MICROCHIP IN ALL OF US 425 00:11:05,733 --> 00:11:06,333 -- SOMETHING HIS WIFE HAD THIS 426 00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:08,166 RESPONSE TO. 427 00:11:08,233 --> 00:11:09,766 >> I KNOW MY HUSBAND IS NOT 428 00:11:09,833 --> 00:11:10,700 VACCINATING PEOPLE AND PUTTING 429 00:11:10,766 --> 00:11:12,633 A MICROCHIP IN THEIR ARM BECAUSE 430 00:11:12,700 --> 00:11:13,566 THAT TECHNOLOGY DOESN'T EVEN 431 00:11:13,633 --> 00:11:14,766 EXIST AND HE'S NEVER UTTERED 432 00:11:14,833 --> 00:11:18,100 THE WORDS OUT OF HIS MOUTH, SO. 433 00:11:18,166 --> 00:11:20,400 [LAUGHS] 434 00:11:20,466 --> 00:11:21,100 >> John: [LAUGHS] 435 00:11:21,166 --> 00:11:22,566 OKAY. 436 00:11:22,633 --> 00:11:23,966 THAT WASN'T THE REASSURING 437 00:11:24,033 --> 00:11:25,600 PUSHBACK TO A BATSHIT CONSPIRACY 438 00:11:25,666 --> 00:11:27,400 THEORY THAT I'D HOPED FOR. 439 00:11:27,466 --> 00:11:28,700 "WE'RE NOT MICROCHIPPING PEOPLE 440 00:11:28,766 --> 00:11:29,700 BECAUSE THE TECHNOLOGY DOESN'T 441 00:11:29,766 --> 00:11:31,366 EXIST -- YET -- AND MY HUSBAND 442 00:11:31,433 --> 00:11:33,366 HASN'T SAID IT OUT LOUD TO ME." 443 00:11:33,433 --> 00:11:34,600 WHY WOULD YOU PUT IT LIKE THAT? 444 00:11:34,666 --> 00:11:36,200 THERE ARE LOTS OF THINGS 445 00:11:36,266 --> 00:11:37,433 A HUSBAND WON'T SAY OUT LOUD 446 00:11:37,500 --> 00:11:39,133 TO HIS WIFE. 447 00:11:39,200 --> 00:11:40,433 NOT DARK THINGS, JUST THINGS. 448 00:11:40,500 --> 00:11:42,133 QUIET THOUGHTS A PARTNER 449 00:11:42,200 --> 00:11:43,400 MIGHT NOT BE READY TO HEAR. 450 00:11:43,466 --> 00:11:45,700 LIKE HOW, SOMETIMES, LATE AT 451 00:11:45,766 --> 00:11:46,833 NIGHT, I THINK: WOULDN'T IT BE 452 00:11:46,900 --> 00:11:48,966 NICE TO LIVE IN AN EGG? 453 00:11:49,033 --> 00:11:50,733 AN EGG, TO BE IN. 454 00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:52,266 NOT JUST AN OVAL-SHAPED 455 00:11:52,333 --> 00:11:53,266 SLEEPING POD -- I CAN GET AN 456 00:11:53,333 --> 00:11:54,100 OVAL SHAPED SLEEPING POD, 457 00:11:54,166 --> 00:11:55,100 NOBODY WANTS ONE OF THOSE. 458 00:11:55,166 --> 00:11:57,200 I MEAN AN EGG. 459 00:11:57,266 --> 00:11:58,633 A BIG EGG WITH ME IN IT, OR 460 00:11:58,700 --> 00:12:00,066 MAYBE A NORMAL EGG, AND I'M 461 00:12:00,133 --> 00:12:01,266 SMALL, IT DOESN'T MATTER. 462 00:12:01,333 --> 00:12:02,933 WHAT MATTERS IS I'M IN AN EGG. 463 00:12:03,000 --> 00:12:05,833 NOT ALONE. 464 00:12:05,900 --> 00:12:06,866 I'M WITH THE GLOOP, TOO, 465 00:12:06,933 --> 00:12:08,133 IT'S JUST ME AND THE GLOOP. 466 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:09,666 NO OPENING, NO WINDOWS, NO WAY 467 00:12:09,733 --> 00:12:10,366 TO EVER KNOW IF IT'S MORNING OR 468 00:12:10,433 --> 00:12:11,666 NIGHT, SO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME 469 00:12:11,733 --> 00:12:12,833 IT IS, ALL THE TIME? 470 00:12:12,900 --> 00:12:15,033 EGG TIME. 471 00:12:15,100 --> 00:12:15,966 JUST EGG-TIME FOR ME AND 472 00:12:16,033 --> 00:12:17,766 THE GLOOP. 473 00:12:17,833 --> 00:12:18,566 SOMETIMES IT'S WARMER, AND 474 00:12:18,633 --> 00:12:20,100 THAT'S WHEN I FEEL SAFEST. 475 00:12:20,166 --> 00:12:21,666 SOMETIMES I CAN TELL I'M BEING 476 00:12:21,733 --> 00:12:23,266 CARRIED, OR MOVED ABOUT AND IT'S 477 00:12:23,333 --> 00:12:24,266 JARRING ENOUGH THAT I'M NERVOUS, 478 00:12:24,333 --> 00:12:25,566 BUT NOT SO ROUGH THAT I'M 479 00:12:25,633 --> 00:12:27,266 PANICKING, AND YOU CAN SHAKE ME. 480 00:12:27,333 --> 00:12:29,066 BUT MAKE SURE NOT TO DO IT HARD 481 00:12:29,133 --> 00:12:30,800 BECAUSE, REMEMBER, I'M FRAGILE. 482 00:12:30,866 --> 00:12:35,133 I AM EGG. 483 00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:36,600 THE POINT IS, YOU CAN'T SAY THAT 484 00:12:36,666 --> 00:12:37,333 TO MELINDA GATES, SHE'D NEVER 485 00:12:37,400 --> 00:12:38,366 UNDERSTAND. 486 00:12:38,433 --> 00:12:40,333 WHAT WIFE COULD? 487 00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:41,666 ANYWAY. 488 00:12:41,733 --> 00:12:43,700 FOR THE RECORD, THERE ARE NO 489 00:12:43,766 --> 00:12:46,233 MICROCHIPS IN THE COVID VACCINE. 490 00:12:46,300 --> 00:12:47,600 THAT RUMOR IS BASED ON THE FACT 491 00:12:47,666 --> 00:12:49,333 THE GATES FOUNDATION FUNDED 492 00:12:49,400 --> 00:12:50,666 RESEARCH YEARS AGO, WHICH IS 493 00:12:50,733 --> 00:12:52,733 FREQUENTLY TAKEN OUT OF CONTEXT. 494 00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:54,566 IN THAT STUDY, RESEARCHERS 495 00:12:54,633 --> 00:12:56,833 LOOKED INTO CREATING AN 496 00:12:56,900 --> 00:12:58,166 INVISIBLE INK THAT COULD 497 00:12:58,233 --> 00:13:00,466 POTENTIALLY BE INJECTED ALONG 498 00:13:00,533 --> 00:13:01,533 WITH A VACCINE IN ORDER FOR 499 00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:02,566 POPULATIONS LIKE REFUGEE KIDS 500 00:13:02,633 --> 00:13:04,533 TO BE ABLE TO RETAIN VACCINE 501 00:13:04,600 --> 00:13:05,866 RECORDS WITHOUT PAPERWORK. 502 00:13:05,933 --> 00:13:08,533 OVER TIME, THE ORIGINAL CONTEXT 503 00:13:08,600 --> 00:13:09,966 WAS LOST, CONTORTED, AND KIND OF 504 00:13:10,033 --> 00:13:11,433 TELEPHONED ITS WAY INTO BECOMING 505 00:13:11,500 --> 00:13:12,766 "SOMETHING SOMETHING BILL GATES 506 00:13:12,833 --> 00:13:14,466 MICROCHIPS" ON FACEBOOK. 507 00:13:14,533 --> 00:13:18,033 A CLAIM WHICH, IF YOU THINK 508 00:13:18,100 --> 00:13:18,833 ABOUT IT FOR JUST A SECOND, 509 00:13:18,900 --> 00:13:22,266 DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. 510 00:13:22,333 --> 00:13:23,133 BECAUSE IF YOUR MAIN CONCERN 511 00:13:23,200 --> 00:13:24,100 IS THAT BILL GATES COULD USE 512 00:13:24,166 --> 00:13:27,966 MICROCHIPS TO TRACK YOU, 513 00:13:28,033 --> 00:13:28,900 HE CAN ALREADY DO THAT! 514 00:13:28,966 --> 00:13:30,033 THAT'S WHAT YOUR FUCKING 515 00:13:30,100 --> 00:13:31,666 PHONE IS! 516 00:13:31,733 --> 00:13:33,166 NOW, ANOTHER, MORE 517 00:13:33,233 --> 00:13:34,066 REASONABLE-SOUNDING, CONCERN HAS 518 00:13:34,133 --> 00:13:35,033 TO DO WITH JUST HOW FAST 519 00:13:35,100 --> 00:13:35,566 THE VACCINE CAME TOGETHER. 520 00:13:35,633 --> 00:13:37,100 >> I WOULDN'T WANT TO GET IT. 521 00:13:37,166 --> 00:13:38,666 I FELT LIKE IT WAS TOO RUSHED. 522 00:13:38,733 --> 00:13:39,766 >> I THINK THE WHOLE THING HAS 523 00:13:39,833 --> 00:13:41,433 BEEN RUSHED THROUGH TOO FAST. 524 00:13:41,500 --> 00:13:42,266 >> IT KIND OF CAME REALLY FAST, 525 00:13:42,333 --> 00:13:43,466 LIKE, THE VACCINE. 526 00:13:43,533 --> 00:13:46,966 THEY MADE UP ONE REALLY FAST. 527 00:13:47,033 --> 00:13:48,233 >> IT WAS DONE WAY TOO QUICK. 528 00:13:48,300 --> 00:13:48,700 I JUST -- I DON'T FEEL 529 00:13:48,766 --> 00:13:50,633 COMFORTABLE WITH TAKING IT, 530 00:13:50,700 --> 00:13:51,866 NOT ANY TIME SOON. 531 00:13:51,933 --> 00:13:53,100 >> I THINK THAT THEY'RE USING 532 00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:53,566 THE -- THE PUBLIC AS 533 00:13:53,633 --> 00:13:56,266 GUINEA PIGS. 534 00:13:56,333 --> 00:13:57,466 >> John: RIGHT, AND THAT DOESN'T 535 00:13:57,533 --> 00:13:58,133 SOUND GOOD. 536 00:13:58,200 --> 00:14:00,766 NO ONE WANTS TO BE A GUINEA PIG. 537 00:14:00,833 --> 00:14:01,500 ALTHOUGH, I DON'T REALLY KNOW 538 00:14:01,566 --> 00:14:02,200 WHY. 539 00:14:02,266 --> 00:14:02,900 BEING A GUINEA PIG SEEMS REALLY 540 00:14:02,966 --> 00:14:03,866 GREAT. 541 00:14:03,933 --> 00:14:04,833 YOU CAN EAT A PEPPER WHILE 542 00:14:04,900 --> 00:14:05,600 WEARING THE STEM AS A LITTLE 543 00:14:05,666 --> 00:14:06,166 HAT. 544 00:14:06,233 --> 00:14:06,866 RUN AROUND A TINY CITY MADE OF 545 00:14:06,933 --> 00:14:07,900 CARDBOARD. 546 00:14:07,966 --> 00:14:09,566 AND BEST OF ALL: YOU GET TO USE 547 00:14:09,633 --> 00:14:10,300 THE "GUINEA PIG BRIDGE." 548 00:14:10,366 --> 00:14:13,200 >> GUINEA PIG BRIDGE! 549 00:14:13,266 --> 00:14:15,966 ♪ ♪ 550 00:14:16,033 --> 00:14:17,833 GUINEA PIG BRIDGE TRANSPORTING 551 00:14:17,900 --> 00:14:19,200 GUINEA PIGS FROM POINT A TO 552 00:14:19,266 --> 00:14:21,966 POINT B. 553 00:14:22,033 --> 00:14:24,500 UTILIZING THE LATEST GUINEA PIG 554 00:14:24,566 --> 00:14:27,733 BRIDGE TECHNOLOGY -- 555 00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:28,266 ♪ ♪ 556 00:14:28,333 --> 00:14:29,200 >> John: YEAH. 557 00:14:29,266 --> 00:14:30,300 BEING A GUINEA PIG HAS ITS 558 00:14:30,366 --> 00:14:30,800 UPSIDES. 559 00:14:30,866 --> 00:14:35,300 THAT'S ALL I'M SAYING. 560 00:14:35,366 --> 00:14:37,000 THE INFRASTRUCTURE ALONE 561 00:14:37,066 --> 00:14:37,966 IS INCREDIBLE. 562 00:14:38,033 --> 00:14:39,066 BUT THAT'S CLEARLY NOT THE 563 00:14:39,133 --> 00:14:40,700 CONCERN THOSE PEOPLE HAVE. 564 00:14:40,766 --> 00:14:41,766 THEIR WORRY IS THAT WE'RE BEING 565 00:14:41,833 --> 00:14:42,466 USED "AS GUINEA PIGS" FOR 566 00:14:42,533 --> 00:14:43,333 A RUSHED, UNTESTED VACCINE. 567 00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:44,533 IT'S AN UNDERSTANDABLE THING 568 00:14:44,600 --> 00:14:45,933 TO WORRY ABOUT, EVEN IF SOME 569 00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:46,633 EXPRESS IT IN LESS-THAN-IDEAL 570 00:14:46,700 --> 00:14:47,633 WAYS. 571 00:14:47,700 --> 00:14:49,533 >> TELL ME WHY YOU'RE CONCERNED. 572 00:14:49,600 --> 00:14:51,066 >> SIX WORDS: TESTING, TESTING, 573 00:14:51,133 --> 00:14:52,466 TESTING, TESTING, AND MORE 574 00:14:52,533 --> 00:14:54,633 TESTING. 575 00:14:54,700 --> 00:14:56,733 IT'S IMPORTANT IF YOU'RE GOING 576 00:14:56,800 --> 00:14:57,800 TO PUT SOMETHING INTO YOUR BODY 577 00:14:57,866 --> 00:14:58,633 THAT IT'S ABSOLUTELY AND TOTALLY 578 00:14:58,700 --> 00:15:00,600 TESTED. 579 00:15:00,666 --> 00:15:01,466 >> John: I'LL TELL YOU WHAT 580 00:15:01,533 --> 00:15:02,433 I ADMIRE ABOUT THAT GUY: 581 00:15:02,500 --> 00:15:03,933 HIS CONFIDENCE. 582 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:05,433 BECAUSE I DON'T THINK I'VE SEEN 583 00:15:05,500 --> 00:15:06,800 ANYONE MORE SELF-ASSURED THAN 584 00:15:06,866 --> 00:15:09,266 THE MAN WHO JUST PROMISED SIX 585 00:15:09,333 --> 00:15:09,866 WORDS, SAID SEVEN, AND COUNTED 586 00:15:09,933 --> 00:15:10,966 FIVE, ALL WITHOUT EVEN 587 00:15:11,033 --> 00:15:14,766 FLINCHING. 588 00:15:14,833 --> 00:15:15,900 THAT GUY IS SO SECURE IN HIS 589 00:15:15,966 --> 00:15:17,633 THINKING, HE CAN BE WRONG ABOUT 590 00:15:17,700 --> 00:15:18,333 NUMBERS ON CAMERA TWICE AND 591 00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:21,433 DO IT WITH A SMILE. 592 00:15:21,500 --> 00:15:22,666 BUT IT'S WORTH UNDERSTANDING 593 00:15:22,733 --> 00:15:24,466 EXACTLY HOW THE VACCINE WAS ABLE 594 00:15:24,533 --> 00:15:27,400 TO COME TO MARKET SO FAST. 595 00:15:27,466 --> 00:15:29,166 BECAUSE RESEARCHERS HAD BEEN 596 00:15:29,233 --> 00:15:29,966 WORKING ON VACCINES AGAINST 597 00:15:30,033 --> 00:15:33,166 OTHER CORONAVIRUSES FOR YEARS. 598 00:15:33,233 --> 00:15:34,600 SO WHEN COVID-19 HIT, THEY HAD 599 00:15:34,666 --> 00:15:36,600 A SIGNIFICANT HEAD START. 600 00:15:36,666 --> 00:15:38,100 "OPERATION WARP SPEED," AS IT 601 00:15:38,166 --> 00:15:39,433 WAS FAMOUSLY CALLED, WASN'T 602 00:15:39,500 --> 00:15:41,733 ABOUT RUSHING THE SCIENCE. 603 00:15:41,800 --> 00:15:42,800 IT WAS ABOUT SIGNIFICANTLY 604 00:15:42,866 --> 00:15:44,300 CUTTING THROUGH BUREAUCRACY 605 00:15:44,366 --> 00:15:45,900 THAT COULD HAVE OTHERWISE SLOWED 606 00:15:45,966 --> 00:15:47,366 IT DOWN, AS THIS VACCINE 607 00:15:47,433 --> 00:15:49,233 RESEARCHER EXPLAINS. 608 00:15:49,300 --> 00:15:51,700 >> DID YOU EVER IMAGINE THAT 609 00:15:51,766 --> 00:15:52,733 WE'D BE ABLE TO DEVELOP A 610 00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:54,833 VACCINE IN 12 TO 18 MONTHS? 611 00:15:54,900 --> 00:15:56,500 >> THE SHORT ANSWER IS NO. 612 00:15:56,566 --> 00:15:58,566 WE'RE ABLE TO COMPRESS THE 613 00:15:58,633 --> 00:16:00,133 TIMELINE, SO THAT THINGS WE 614 00:16:00,200 --> 00:16:02,166 WOULD NORMALLY DO IN A LINEAR 615 00:16:02,233 --> 00:16:05,233 FASHION, A TO B, WE ACTUALLY 616 00:16:05,300 --> 00:16:06,233 START THE F AND THE E 617 00:16:06,300 --> 00:16:11,200 AT THE SAME TIME AS A AND B. 618 00:16:11,266 --> 00:16:12,000 >> John: EXACTLY. 619 00:16:12,066 --> 00:16:12,266 FLASHBACK 620 00:16:12,333 --> 00:16:12,733 THEY TOOK STEPS 621 00:16:12,800 --> 00:16:13,733 THAT USUALLY HAPPEN 622 00:16:13,800 --> 00:16:14,600 SEQUENTIALLY, AND SAVED TIME BY 623 00:16:14,666 --> 00:16:15,933 RUNNING THEM SIMULTANEOUSLY. 624 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:17,000 AND TO BE HONEST, I'M ENVIOUS OF 625 00:16:17,066 --> 00:16:17,933 THAT LEVEL OF EFFICIENCY. 626 00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:19,300 I'D SAVE SO MUCH TIME EVERY 627 00:16:19,366 --> 00:16:20,233 MORNING IF I COULD SHIT, SHOWER, 628 00:16:20,300 --> 00:16:22,266 SHAVE, EAT BREAKFAST, KISS MY 629 00:16:22,333 --> 00:16:22,800 FAMILY, AND BRUSH MY TEETH 630 00:16:22,866 --> 00:16:24,100 ALL AT THE SAME TIME. 631 00:16:24,166 --> 00:16:25,466 UNFORTUNATELY, I'VE ONLY EVER 632 00:16:25,533 --> 00:16:26,633 MANAGED TO DO THREE OF THEM 633 00:16:26,700 --> 00:16:27,666 AT ONCE. 634 00:16:27,733 --> 00:16:30,066 BUT I'M SO CLOSE TO 635 00:16:30,133 --> 00:16:31,066 THAT FOURTH ONE. 636 00:16:31,133 --> 00:16:32,700 ANOTHER CONCERN YOU MAY HAVE 637 00:16:32,766 --> 00:16:34,500 HEARD OR SEEN ONLINE, IS THAT 638 00:16:34,566 --> 00:16:35,966 THE PFIZER AND MODERNA VACCINES 639 00:16:36,033 --> 00:16:37,366 ARE THE FIRST AUTHORIZED TO USE 640 00:16:37,433 --> 00:16:38,366 MESSENGER RNA. 641 00:16:38,433 --> 00:16:39,966 WHICH IS TRUE. 642 00:16:40,033 --> 00:16:41,700 BUT THAT'S GIVEN RISE TO 643 00:16:41,766 --> 00:16:42,866 SPECULATION ABOUT WHAT mRNA 644 00:16:42,933 --> 00:16:45,100 IS CAPABLE OF DOING. 645 00:16:45,166 --> 00:16:46,300 >> BASICALLY, ANYONE TAKING 646 00:16:46,366 --> 00:16:47,333 THESE VACCINES -- THEY'RE ALL 647 00:16:47,400 --> 00:16:48,966 DESIGNED TO DO THE SAME THING -- 648 00:16:49,033 --> 00:16:50,733 IS GOING TO HAVE NEUROLOGICAL 649 00:16:50,800 --> 00:16:53,000 DISORDERS WITHIN ONE YEAR. 650 00:16:53,066 --> 00:16:54,766 MOST OF THE PEOPLE TAKING THE 651 00:16:54,833 --> 00:16:56,066 VACCINE WILL BE DEAD WITHIN 10. 652 00:16:56,133 --> 00:16:58,600 LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING: YOU 653 00:16:58,666 --> 00:17:00,333 TAKE THE mRNA, IT CREATES PLAQUE 654 00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:01,033 IN YOUR BRAIN AND GIVES 655 00:17:01,100 --> 00:17:01,900 YOU ALZHEIMER'S AND I GOT 656 00:17:01,966 --> 00:17:03,200 THE STUDIES TOO. 657 00:17:03,266 --> 00:17:04,300 SO, HEY! 658 00:17:04,366 --> 00:17:05,200 YOU THINK THEY JUST PUT FLUORIDE 659 00:17:05,266 --> 00:17:06,000 IN THE WATER TO DUMB YOU DOWN? 660 00:17:06,066 --> 00:17:07,233 WHOO! 661 00:17:07,300 --> 00:17:08,233 >> John: MAN, ALEX JONES IS 662 00:17:08,300 --> 00:17:10,066 HAVING A BLAST. 663 00:17:10,133 --> 00:17:11,733 NO ONE ELSE HAS AS MUCH FUN 664 00:17:11,800 --> 00:17:12,766 WHILE MAKING THE WORLD 665 00:17:12,833 --> 00:17:14,800 A WORSE PLACE TO LIVE IN. 666 00:17:14,866 --> 00:17:16,266 IT'S LIKE HE INVENTED A JETPACK 667 00:17:16,333 --> 00:17:17,666 THAT SPRAYS EVERYONE BENEATH HIM 668 00:17:17,733 --> 00:17:20,633 WITH HUMAN SHIT. 669 00:17:20,700 --> 00:17:25,800 BUT THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO 670 00:17:25,866 --> 00:17:26,600 EVIDENCE OR CREDIBLE STUDIES 671 00:17:26,666 --> 00:17:27,433 SUPPORTING ANY OF WHAT HE JUST 672 00:17:27,500 --> 00:17:28,300 SAID. 673 00:17:28,366 --> 00:17:29,466 AS FOR THE CLAIM THAT mRNA 674 00:17:29,533 --> 00:17:30,600 VACCINES MODIFY YOUR DNA, IT IS 675 00:17:30,666 --> 00:17:32,533 VERY IMPORTANT TO KNOW THAT 676 00:17:32,600 --> 00:17:33,766 THE VACCINE'S mRNA DOES NOT 677 00:17:33,833 --> 00:17:36,066 ENTER OUR GENOME. 678 00:17:36,133 --> 00:17:37,933 IT DOES ITS WORK FAR FROM THE 679 00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:39,666 CELL'S NUCLEUS, WHICH IS WHERE 680 00:17:39,733 --> 00:17:40,933 YOUR DNA IS. 681 00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:42,966 BUT THE FEAR OF WHAT THE VACCINE 682 00:17:43,033 --> 00:17:44,133 CONTAINS, OR WHAT IT COULD DO TO 683 00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:46,433 YOU, SEEMS TO BE COMMON. 684 00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:48,100 SOME EVANGELICALS ARE CONCERNED 685 00:17:48,166 --> 00:17:49,600 IT CONTAINS CELLS FROM ABORTED 686 00:17:49,666 --> 00:17:52,500 FETUSES -- WHICH IT DOES NOT. 687 00:17:52,566 --> 00:17:54,000 OTHERS WORRY THAT IT COULD 688 00:17:54,066 --> 00:17:54,833 CHANGE THE BODY'S INNER 689 00:17:54,900 --> 00:17:56,000 WORKINGS. 690 00:17:56,066 --> 00:17:57,233 YOU MIGHT HAVE HAD A FRIEND TELL 691 00:17:57,300 --> 00:17:58,066 YOU THEY'RE WORRIED THE VACCINES 692 00:17:58,133 --> 00:17:59,800 CAUSE INFERTILITY. 693 00:17:59,866 --> 00:18:01,800 THOSE RUMORS WERE FUELED BY A 694 00:18:01,866 --> 00:18:03,200 BLOG POST, WHICH FALSELY CLAIMED 695 00:18:03,266 --> 00:18:05,366 THAT PFIZER'S VACCINE CONTAINED 696 00:18:05,433 --> 00:18:06,733 INGREDIENTS CAPABLE OF "TRAINING 697 00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:09,200 THE FEMALE BODY TO ATTACK 698 00:18:09,266 --> 00:18:10,466 A PROTEIN THAT PLAYS A CRUCIAL 699 00:18:10,533 --> 00:18:11,666 ROLE IN THE DEVELOPMENT OF 700 00:18:11,733 --> 00:18:12,233 THE PLACENTA." 701 00:18:12,300 --> 00:18:13,600 BUT A FEW THINGS THERE. 702 00:18:13,666 --> 00:18:15,500 FIRST, EXPERTS SAY OF THAT 703 00:18:15,566 --> 00:18:16,633 CLAIM, "IT'S A MYTH, IT'S 704 00:18:16,700 --> 00:18:17,533 INACCURATE. 705 00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:18,366 THERE IS NO EVIDENCE 706 00:18:18,433 --> 00:18:20,033 TO SUPPORT IT." 707 00:18:20,100 --> 00:18:22,033 AND THERE'S ALREADY PRETTY GOOD 708 00:18:22,100 --> 00:18:23,733 PROOF THAT PFIZER'S VACCINE 709 00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:24,966 DOESN'T CAUSE INFERTILITY, 710 00:18:25,033 --> 00:18:25,933 BECAUSE DURING THE TRIALS 711 00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:28,133 LAST YEAR, MULTIPLE WOMEN BECAME 712 00:18:28,200 --> 00:18:29,933 PREGNANT, AND THE ONLY ONE WHO 713 00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:31,200 SUFFERED A PREGNANCY LOSS WAS 714 00:18:31,266 --> 00:18:32,300 GIVEN THE PLACEBO. 715 00:18:32,366 --> 00:18:36,066 SO IT'S JUST NOT TRUE. 716 00:18:36,133 --> 00:18:37,200 AND THE FINAL MYTH YOU MAY HAVE 717 00:18:37,266 --> 00:18:38,900 HEARD IS THAT THE RISKS FROM 718 00:18:38,966 --> 00:18:41,200 THE VACCINE ARE SOMEHOW GREATER 719 00:18:41,266 --> 00:18:44,366 THAN THE RISKS OF COVID. 720 00:18:44,433 --> 00:18:45,500 THAT IS A PERCEPTION FED BY 721 00:18:45,566 --> 00:18:46,566 THE CONSTANT CIRCULATION OF 722 00:18:46,633 --> 00:18:47,133 MISLEADING HEADLINES ABOUT 723 00:18:47,200 --> 00:18:48,400 PEOPLE FALLING ILL OR DYING 724 00:18:48,466 --> 00:18:50,300 AFTER GETTING THEIR SHOT. 725 00:18:50,366 --> 00:18:53,266 FOR INSTANCE, YOU MAY HAVE SEEN 726 00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:53,800 THIS STORY THAT WAS WIDELY 727 00:18:53,866 --> 00:18:54,866 SHARED ABOUT 23 PEOPLE IN 728 00:18:54,933 --> 00:18:56,300 NORWAY DYING WITHIN A WEEK OF 729 00:18:56,366 --> 00:18:59,400 GETTING THE SHOT. 730 00:18:59,466 --> 00:19:00,933 WHICH DOES SOUND SCARY, BUT THAT 731 00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:02,066 HEADLINE IS MISSING SOME PRETTY 732 00:19:02,133 --> 00:19:03,200 MAJOR CONTEXT. 733 00:19:03,266 --> 00:19:06,266 WHILE THOSE PEOPLE DID DIE, 734 00:19:06,333 --> 00:19:07,233 AT THAT POINT IN NORWAY, THE 735 00:19:07,300 --> 00:19:08,533 VACCINE WAS BEING ADMINISTERED 736 00:19:08,600 --> 00:19:10,033 TO THE OLDEST OR SICKEST PEOPLE. 737 00:19:10,100 --> 00:19:12,233 AND A CERTAIN PERCENTAGE OF THEM 738 00:19:12,300 --> 00:19:13,300 WERE, STATISTICALLY, GOING TO 739 00:19:13,366 --> 00:19:14,466 DIE THAT WEEK, VACCINE OR 740 00:19:14,533 --> 00:19:16,466 NO VACCINE. 741 00:19:16,533 --> 00:19:18,833 ON AVERAGE, 400 PEOPLE DIE EACH 742 00:19:18,900 --> 00:19:21,600 WEEK IN NURSING HOMES IN NORWAY. 743 00:19:21,666 --> 00:19:22,766 AND WHEN THE WORLD HEALTH 744 00:19:22,833 --> 00:19:24,966 ORGANIZATION REVIEWED THOSE 745 00:19:25,033 --> 00:19:26,166 INCIDENTS, THEY DIDN'T FIND 746 00:19:26,233 --> 00:19:27,100 ANY UNEXPECTED OR UNTOWARD 747 00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:29,466 INCREASE IN FATALITIES. 748 00:19:29,533 --> 00:19:30,533 WHICH MAKES SENSE -- CORRELATION 749 00:19:30,600 --> 00:19:32,000 ISN'T CAUSATION. 750 00:19:32,066 --> 00:19:33,900 THE VACCINE PROTECTS AGAINST 751 00:19:33,966 --> 00:19:35,066 COVID, NOT THE CONCEPT OF 752 00:19:35,133 --> 00:19:37,533 MORTALITY. 753 00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:38,433 IT IS WEIRD THAT I HAVE TO 754 00:19:38,500 --> 00:19:38,966 CLARIFY THIS, BUT YOU ARE, 755 00:19:39,033 --> 00:19:40,266 IN FACT, GOING TO DIE ONE DAY, 756 00:19:40,333 --> 00:19:44,466 MIKE. 757 00:19:44,533 --> 00:19:45,333 YEAH, MIKE. 758 00:19:45,400 --> 00:19:47,166 STOP LISTENING TO WHAT JOE ROGAN 759 00:19:47,233 --> 00:19:48,366 TELLS YOU. 760 00:19:48,433 --> 00:19:49,300 HE'S A FUCKING MORON -- HIS 761 00:19:49,366 --> 00:19:50,500 WORDS, NOT MINE. 762 00:19:50,566 --> 00:19:53,033 THAT ALSO GOES FOR STORIES 763 00:19:53,100 --> 00:19:53,966 YOU MIGHT SEE HYPING UP 764 00:19:54,033 --> 00:19:54,933 SCARY-SOUNDING DATA FROM VAERS 765 00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:56,366 -- THE VACCINE ADVERSE EVENT 766 00:19:56,433 --> 00:19:57,666 REPORTING SYSTEM. 767 00:19:57,733 --> 00:19:59,000 IT'S A DATABASE THAT COLLECTS 768 00:19:59,066 --> 00:20:00,366 STORIES OF MEDICAL EVENTS 769 00:20:00,433 --> 00:20:02,033 FOLLOWING VACCINATIONS. 770 00:20:02,100 --> 00:20:03,433 BUT ANY LAYPERSON HAS TO TREAT 771 00:20:03,500 --> 00:20:04,800 DATA COMING OUT OF IT WITH 772 00:20:04,866 --> 00:20:06,133 EXTREME CAUTION. 773 00:20:06,200 --> 00:20:07,933 BECAUSE REPORTS CAN BE ENTERED 774 00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:09,666 BY ANYONE AND ARE NOT ROUTINELY 775 00:20:09,733 --> 00:20:11,633 VERIFIED -- ONE RESEARCHER ONCE 776 00:20:11,700 --> 00:20:13,400 CLAIMED THAT THE FLU VACCINE 777 00:20:13,466 --> 00:20:15,133 TURNED HIM INTO THE HULK, AND 778 00:20:15,200 --> 00:20:16,433 THAT REPORT WAS ACCEPTED AND 779 00:20:16,500 --> 00:20:20,100 ENTERED INTO THE DATABASE. 780 00:20:20,166 --> 00:20:21,466 WHICH IS COMPLETELY ABSURD. 781 00:20:21,533 --> 00:20:22,866 A DRUG CAN'T TURN YOU INTO 782 00:20:22,933 --> 00:20:24,233 THE HULK, ALTHOUGH IT CAN TURN 783 00:20:24,300 --> 00:20:25,633 YOU INTO CAPTAIN AMERICA, 784 00:20:25,700 --> 00:20:27,000 THE ONLY SUPERHERO WHOSE ORIGIN 785 00:20:27,066 --> 00:20:28,200 STORY IS "A METRIC TON OF 786 00:20:28,266 --> 00:20:31,100 EXPERIMENTAL NAZI STEROIDS." 787 00:20:31,166 --> 00:20:33,000 AND IF WE'RE JUST GOING TO SHARE 788 00:20:33,066 --> 00:20:35,000 RANDOM, UNVERIFIED SIDE EFFECTS, 789 00:20:35,066 --> 00:20:36,866 I MIGHT AS WELL SHOW YOU THIS 790 00:20:36,933 --> 00:20:38,633 TRULY SHOCKING VIDEO ABOUT WHAT 791 00:20:38,700 --> 00:20:41,266 MIGHT WELL HAPPEN TO YOUR MOM. 792 00:20:41,333 --> 00:20:42,366 >> SO MY MOM GOT THE VACCINE 793 00:20:42,433 --> 00:20:43,500 BECAUSE SHE'S A HEALTHCARE 794 00:20:43,566 --> 00:20:45,766 WORKER AND SHE TOLD ME SHE'S 795 00:20:45,833 --> 00:20:47,500 EXPERIENCING SOME SIDE EFFECTS. 796 00:20:47,566 --> 00:20:48,966 MOM, WHAT'S THAT SIDE EFFECT 797 00:20:49,033 --> 00:20:51,400 YOU SAID YOU'RE EXPERIENCING? 798 00:20:51,466 --> 00:20:54,633 >> BEING A BOSS ASS BITCH. 799 00:20:54,700 --> 00:20:55,833 >> John: VERY GOOD. 800 00:20:55,900 --> 00:20:56,866 AND LOOK, I'M NOT SAYING VAERS 801 00:20:56,933 --> 00:20:57,900 IS USELESS. 802 00:20:57,966 --> 00:20:58,866 IT VERY MUCH ISN'T. 803 00:20:58,933 --> 00:21:01,266 THE REASON THE CDC COLLECTS DATA 804 00:21:01,333 --> 00:21:02,700 FROM IT IS SO, IF A PATTERN DOES 805 00:21:02,766 --> 00:21:03,600 EMERGE, ACTIONS CAN BE TAKEN -- 806 00:21:03,666 --> 00:21:05,066 THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED 807 00:21:05,133 --> 00:21:06,733 WITH THE JOHNSON & JOHNSON SHOT. 808 00:21:06,800 --> 00:21:08,666 THE CDC FOUND A POTENTIAL 809 00:21:08,733 --> 00:21:09,900 PATTERN OF RARE BLOOD CLOTS 810 00:21:09,966 --> 00:21:11,700 AND PAUSED THE ROLLOUT 811 00:21:11,766 --> 00:21:14,466 UNDER AN ABUNDANCE OF CAUTION. 812 00:21:14,533 --> 00:21:16,300 AND WHILE SOME VACCINE SKEPTICS 813 00:21:16,366 --> 00:21:17,300 POINTED TO THAT AS EVIDENCE THEY 814 00:21:17,366 --> 00:21:18,533 WERE RIGHT ABOUT VACCINES BEING 815 00:21:18,600 --> 00:21:19,900 DANGEROUS, IN REALITY, IT KIND 816 00:21:19,966 --> 00:21:22,600 OF PROVES THE OPPOSITE. 817 00:21:22,666 --> 00:21:24,200 THAT THE SAFETY RISK OF VACCINES 818 00:21:24,266 --> 00:21:25,566 IS RIGOROUSLY AND PUBLICLY 819 00:21:25,633 --> 00:21:27,900 ANALYZED, NOT SECRETLY BURIED 820 00:21:27,966 --> 00:21:29,933 AND SOMEHOW LEAKED TO THE HUMAN 821 00:21:30,000 --> 00:21:32,400 FOOTBALL'S NEON SCREAM HOUR. 822 00:21:32,466 --> 00:21:33,733 AND NONE OF THIS IS TO SAY THAT 823 00:21:33,800 --> 00:21:34,900 THERE ARE NO SIDE EFFECTS TO 824 00:21:34,966 --> 00:21:35,633 THE VACCINES. 825 00:21:35,700 --> 00:21:39,400 THERE CAN BE. 826 00:21:39,466 --> 00:21:41,000 IT'S JUST THAT SERIOUS ONES LIKE 827 00:21:41,066 --> 00:21:42,366 ANAPHYLAXIS ARE INCREDIBLY RARE 828 00:21:42,433 --> 00:21:43,733 -- 4.7 CASES PER MILLION FOR 829 00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:46,500 PFIZER, TWO AND A HALF CASES 830 00:21:46,566 --> 00:21:47,666 PER MILLION FOR MODERNA -- AND 831 00:21:47,733 --> 00:21:48,600 YOU SHOULD KNOW, THOSE ALSO 832 00:21:48,666 --> 00:21:49,600 OCCUR MOSTLY IN INDIVIDUALS WITH 833 00:21:49,666 --> 00:21:53,433 A HISTORY OF SEVERE ALLERGIES. 834 00:21:53,500 --> 00:21:55,700 THE FACT IS, THE VAST MAJORITY 835 00:21:55,766 --> 00:21:57,700 OF PEOPLE CAN EXPECT, AT MOST, 836 00:21:57,766 --> 00:21:59,466 TYPICAL COLD OR FLU SYMPTOMS 837 00:21:59,533 --> 00:22:00,833 IN THE FIRST FEW DAYS AFTER 838 00:22:00,900 --> 00:22:02,000 THEIR SHOT, OR MAYBE JUST 839 00:22:02,066 --> 00:22:04,833 A SORE ARM, OR NOTHING AT ALL. 840 00:22:04,900 --> 00:22:07,566 FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH: I GOT MY 841 00:22:07,633 --> 00:22:09,666 SECOND SHOT THIS THURSDAY, MY 842 00:22:09,733 --> 00:22:12,866 ARM HURT A LITTLE BIT FOR A DAY, 843 00:22:12,933 --> 00:22:14,000 BUT THAT'S BASICALLY IT. 844 00:22:14,066 --> 00:22:14,600 I WILL SAY -- THE FOLLOWING 845 00:22:14,666 --> 00:22:15,866 AFTERNOON, FOR A COUPLE OF 846 00:22:15,933 --> 00:22:17,866 HOURS, I DID FEEL A LITTLE LIKE 847 00:22:17,933 --> 00:22:18,900 A BOSS ASS BITCH, BUT IT PASSED 848 00:22:18,966 --> 00:22:20,233 QUICKLY. 849 00:22:20,300 --> 00:22:21,833 AND ANYWAY, THE KEY THING TO 850 00:22:21,900 --> 00:22:22,766 REMEMBER IS THAT NO "SIDE 851 00:22:22,833 --> 00:22:24,666 EFFECT" OF THE VACCINE IS WORSE 852 00:22:24,733 --> 00:22:26,333 THAN THE ALTERNATIVE: COVID, 853 00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:29,033 A DISEASE THAT'S KILLED OVER 854 00:22:29,100 --> 00:22:30,833 500,000 PEOPLE IN THE U.S. 855 00:22:30,900 --> 00:22:32,466 ALONE, WHILE, ONCE AGAIN, 856 00:22:32,533 --> 00:22:34,066 TO DATE, THE VACCINE HAS BEEN 857 00:22:34,133 --> 00:22:36,566 PROVEN TO KILL EXACTLY ZERO. 858 00:22:36,633 --> 00:22:37,800 SO IT'S MORE THAN NATURAL 859 00:22:37,866 --> 00:22:39,366 TO HAVE QUESTIONS. 860 00:22:39,433 --> 00:22:40,800 BUT THERE ARE REASSURING ANSWERS 861 00:22:40,866 --> 00:22:42,766 OUT THERE. 862 00:22:42,833 --> 00:22:44,633 AND ANYONE JUST THROWING OUT 863 00:22:44,700 --> 00:22:45,833 QUESTIONS WITHOUT ACKNOWLEDGING 864 00:22:45,900 --> 00:22:47,566 THAT PROBABLY HAS ANOTHER AGENDA 865 00:22:47,633 --> 00:22:50,233 ENTIRELY. 866 00:22:50,300 --> 00:22:51,766 BUT THE PROBLEM IS, TO GET 867 00:22:51,833 --> 00:22:53,366 ANYWHERE CLOSE TO HERD IMMUNITY, 868 00:22:53,433 --> 00:22:55,166 WE BADLY NEED TO CONVINCE ANYONE 869 00:22:55,233 --> 00:22:57,800 WHO CAN BE CONVINCED. 870 00:22:57,866 --> 00:22:58,766 THE QUESTION IS, HOW DO WE DO 871 00:22:58,833 --> 00:23:00,100 THAT? 872 00:23:00,166 --> 00:23:01,600 WELL, SOME REPUBLICAN LAWMAKERS, 873 00:23:01,666 --> 00:23:03,100 TO THEIR CREDIT, HAVE TRIED TO 874 00:23:03,166 --> 00:23:05,466 REASSURE THEIR VOTERS. 875 00:23:05,533 --> 00:23:06,900 ALTHOUGH OCCASIONALLY THOSE 876 00:23:06,966 --> 00:23:10,800 ATTEMPTS HAVE LOOKED LIKE THIS. 877 00:23:10,866 --> 00:23:12,033 >> LIVE FREE AND BEAUTY 878 00:23:12,100 --> 00:23:14,166 SURROUNDS YOU. 879 00:23:14,233 --> 00:23:16,333 THE WORLD STILL ASTOUNDS YOU 880 00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:19,233 EACH TIME YOU LOOK AT A STAR. 881 00:23:19,300 --> 00:23:21,433 I'M SENATOR JOHN KENNEDY. 882 00:23:21,500 --> 00:23:23,000 I CAN'T SING VERY WELL, 883 00:23:23,066 --> 00:23:24,166 BUT I'M FREE. 884 00:23:24,233 --> 00:23:25,333 BE FREE. 885 00:23:25,400 --> 00:23:26,733 BE COOL. 886 00:23:26,800 --> 00:23:28,666 GET THE VACCINE. 887 00:23:28,733 --> 00:23:30,766 I DID, IT WORKS. 888 00:23:30,833 --> 00:23:33,066 >> John: OKAY. 889 00:23:33,133 --> 00:23:34,566 I DON'T LOVE THAT, AND NOT JUST 890 00:23:34,633 --> 00:23:35,200 BECAUSE IT'S THE WORST THING TO 891 00:23:35,266 --> 00:23:36,866 COME OUT OF A KENNEDY'S MOUTH 892 00:23:36,933 --> 00:23:37,800 SINCE THE BACK OF A KENNEDY'S 893 00:23:37,866 --> 00:23:39,366 HEAD -- BUT ALSO BECAUSE, 894 00:23:39,433 --> 00:23:41,033 THE TRUTH IS, THAT PROBABLY 895 00:23:41,100 --> 00:23:42,166 DIDN'T CONVINCE ANYONE. 896 00:23:42,233 --> 00:23:44,300 IN RESEARCHING THIS PIECE, 897 00:23:44,366 --> 00:23:46,066 EXPERTS REPEATEDLY TOLD US THAT 898 00:23:46,133 --> 00:23:47,666 THE VACCINE HESITANT GENERALLY 899 00:23:47,733 --> 00:23:49,033 DON'T RESPOND WELL TO HEARING 900 00:23:49,100 --> 00:23:50,200 FROM POLITICIANS, CELEBRITIES, 901 00:23:50,266 --> 00:23:51,466 OR ATHLETES TELLING THEM TO GET 902 00:23:51,533 --> 00:23:52,633 THE VACCINE. 903 00:23:52,700 --> 00:23:54,766 AND I GET THAT. 904 00:23:54,833 --> 00:23:56,233 I'D LOVE TO THINK THAT I COULD 905 00:23:56,300 --> 00:23:58,166 END THIS PIECE, HAVING CAREFULLY 906 00:23:58,233 --> 00:23:59,733 LAID OUT SOME DATA, 907 00:23:59,800 --> 00:24:01,000 WITH A TRIUMPHANT CALL FOR 908 00:24:01,066 --> 00:24:02,200 PEOPLE TO GET VACCINATED, 909 00:24:02,266 --> 00:24:03,966 FEATURING A MASCOT OF SOME 910 00:24:04,033 --> 00:24:05,433 INCONGRUOUS ANIMAL LIKE, 911 00:24:05,500 --> 00:24:06,966 I DUNNO, A VACCINE CICADA. 912 00:24:07,033 --> 00:24:08,366 YOU DON'T THINK THAT'S SOMETHING 913 00:24:08,433 --> 00:24:10,033 I'D BE INTERESTED IN DOING? 914 00:24:10,100 --> 00:24:11,166 THE TRUTH IS, WE ACTUALLY DID 915 00:24:11,233 --> 00:24:12,266 THAT. 916 00:24:12,333 --> 00:24:13,833 WE HAD A VACCINE CICADA COSTUME 917 00:24:13,900 --> 00:24:15,500 MADE. 918 00:24:15,566 --> 00:24:16,900 BUT AFTER BEING ADVISED THAT 919 00:24:16,966 --> 00:24:18,433 THIS TECHNIQUE WOULDN'T BE 920 00:24:18,500 --> 00:24:19,666 REMOTELY EFFECTIVE IN CONVINCING 921 00:24:19,733 --> 00:24:21,233 PEOPLE WHO WERE HESITANT, WE 922 00:24:21,300 --> 00:24:22,900 SCRAPPED THE IDEA COMPLETELY. 923 00:24:22,966 --> 00:24:24,600 WE EMAILED OUR MASCOT GUY AND 924 00:24:24,666 --> 00:24:26,100 TOLD HIM NOT TO COME IN. 925 00:24:26,166 --> 00:24:27,300 BECAUSE IT WAS AN ABSOLUTELY 926 00:24:27,366 --> 00:24:29,233 STUPID IDEA. 927 00:24:29,300 --> 00:24:30,766 A VACCINE CICADA? 928 00:24:30,833 --> 00:24:32,500 CAN YOU IMAGINE HOW DUMB THAT 929 00:24:32,566 --> 00:24:33,966 WOULD LOOK? 930 00:24:34,033 --> 00:24:35,966 IT PROBABLY WOULDN'T END UP EVEN 931 00:24:36,033 --> 00:24:37,266 LOOKING LIKE A CICADA, MORE LIKE 932 00:24:37,333 --> 00:24:39,500 SOME KIND OF UNHINGED COCKROACH. 933 00:24:39,566 --> 00:24:41,033 IT WAS A TERRIBLE CONCEPT 934 00:24:41,100 --> 00:24:42,333 THAT COULD HAVE FUNDAMENTALLY 935 00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:43,800 UNDERMINED THE VERY IMPORTANT 936 00:24:43,866 --> 00:24:45,333 MESSAGE THAT WE WERE TRYING TO 937 00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:47,400 SEND, AND I'M SO GLAD WE AVOIDED 938 00:24:47,466 --> 00:24:50,100 MAKING THAT MISTAKE. 939 00:24:50,166 --> 00:24:52,033 THE TRUTH IS, I'M NOT GOING TO 940 00:24:52,100 --> 00:24:53,300 BE ABLE TO CONVINCE THE PEOPLE 941 00:24:53,366 --> 00:24:54,700 IN YOUR LIFE WHO ARE HESITANT. 942 00:24:54,766 --> 00:24:56,200 THE PERSON WITH THE BEST CHANCE 943 00:24:56,266 --> 00:24:59,166 OF DOING THAT IS YOU. 944 00:24:59,233 --> 00:25:01,233 SO IF YOU KNOW SOMEONE WORRIED, 945 00:25:01,300 --> 00:25:02,733 FOR WHATEVER REASON, AND YOU 946 00:25:02,800 --> 00:25:04,966 WANT TO CONVINCE THEM OTHERWISE, 947 00:25:05,033 --> 00:25:06,500 DO NOT SHOW THEM THIS VIDEO. 948 00:25:06,566 --> 00:25:07,766 BUT MAYBE DO TRY AND USE SOME OF 949 00:25:07,833 --> 00:25:09,466 THE INFORMATION INSIDE IT TO 950 00:25:09,533 --> 00:25:11,800 TELL THEM YOURSELF AND WHEN 951 00:25:11,866 --> 00:25:13,333 YOU'RE DOING THAT, TRY NOT TO 952 00:25:13,400 --> 00:25:14,533 DISMISS OR JUDGE THEM FOR HAVING 953 00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:15,300 DOUBTS. 954 00:25:15,366 --> 00:25:16,633 AND I KNOW THAT'S NOT ALWAYS 955 00:25:16,700 --> 00:25:17,233 EASY. 956 00:25:17,300 --> 00:25:18,566 I COULD HAVE GIVEN THAT GUY 957 00:25:18,633 --> 00:25:19,566 A PASS FOR HOLDING UP THE WRONG 958 00:25:19,633 --> 00:25:20,266 NUMBER OF FINGERS. 959 00:25:20,333 --> 00:25:21,266 I COULDN'T DO IT! 960 00:25:21,333 --> 00:25:22,400 I DON'T HAVE THAT LEVEL OF 961 00:25:22,466 --> 00:25:23,733 RESTRAINT! 962 00:25:23,800 --> 00:25:26,733 I'M A SMALL, PETTY MAN, AND THAT 963 00:25:26,800 --> 00:25:28,633 GUY IS A FUCKING IDIOT! 964 00:25:28,700 --> 00:25:31,433 BUT IF YOU THINK YOU CAN 965 00:25:31,500 --> 00:25:32,566 DO BETTER, IT IS INCREDIBLY 966 00:25:32,633 --> 00:25:33,333 IMPORTANT THAT YOU TRY. 967 00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:34,866 OR, TO PUT IT IN TERMS THAT THAT 968 00:25:34,933 --> 00:25:36,566 GUY COULD UNDERSTAND: I'VE GOT 969 00:25:36,633 --> 00:25:38,700 TWO WORDS FOR YOU: PLEASE JUST 970 00:25:38,766 --> 00:25:40,700 TRY AS HARD AS YOU CAN. 971 00:25:40,766 --> 00:25:41,600 AND NOW: THIS. 972 00:25:41,666 --> 00:25:42,066 ♪ ♪ 973 00:25:42,133 --> 00:25:47,066 >> Announcer: AND NOW... 974 00:25:47,133 --> 00:25:49,466 DANA PERINO GREW UP ON A RANCH. 975 00:25:49,533 --> 00:25:51,466 TO SPEAK OF THE DEMOCRATS ARE 976 00:25:51,533 --> 00:25:53,033 PLOWING OLD GROUND OVER AND 977 00:25:53,100 --> 00:25:55,000 OVER AGAIN, AND I GREW UP ON A 978 00:25:55,066 --> 00:25:55,466 RANCH. 979 00:25:55,533 --> 00:25:57,533 >> MOUNT RUSHMORE, ONE OF MY 980 00:25:57,600 --> 00:25:58,666 VERY FAVORITE PLACES. 981 00:25:58,733 --> 00:26:00,100 WENT THERE EVERY YEAR AS A KID 982 00:26:00,166 --> 00:26:02,666 TO VISIT, NEAR MY GRANDPARENTS' 983 00:26:02,733 --> 00:26:02,966 RANCH. 984 00:26:03,033 --> 00:26:05,166 IN MY RANCH, WE HAD A DOG NAMED 985 00:26:05,233 --> 00:26:06,066 CHOCO AND MY SISTER AND I 986 00:26:06,133 --> 00:26:08,233 BROUGHT HOME A CAT FROM THE 987 00:26:08,300 --> 00:26:08,600 RANCH. 988 00:26:08,666 --> 00:26:11,166 >> IN NEWCASTLE, WYOMING, AND MY 989 00:26:11,233 --> 00:26:11,566 GRANDPA'S RANCH. 990 00:26:11,633 --> 00:26:14,800 >> THAT IS OR MY GRANDFATHER'S 991 00:26:14,866 --> 00:26:15,000 RANCH. 992 00:26:15,066 --> 00:26:16,133 >> MY GRANDFATHER'S RANCH. 993 00:26:16,200 --> 00:26:18,733 >> HE GOT ME A PONY NAMED SALLY. 994 00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:20,300 >> MY FIRST PONY WAS NAMED 995 00:26:20,366 --> 00:26:20,500 SALLY. 996 00:26:20,566 --> 00:26:22,333 >> WHEN I WAS A BABY, MY 997 00:26:22,400 --> 00:26:23,866 GRANDFATHER BOUGHT ME A BABY. 998 00:26:23,933 --> 00:26:25,266 HER NAME WAS ALLIE. 999 00:26:25,333 --> 00:26:28,200 >> I HAD A PONY NAMED SALLY. 1000 00:26:28,266 --> 00:26:29,833 I HAD SOME OTHER ANIMALS. 1001 00:26:29,900 --> 00:26:30,733 MY GRANDFATHER'S RANCH. 1002 00:26:30,800 --> 00:26:33,266 >> MY GRANDFATHER ON MY FATHERS 1003 00:26:33,333 --> 00:26:35,100 SIDE UP AT THE RANCH. 1004 00:26:35,166 --> 00:26:36,366 >> INTERESTING, HAVING GROWN UP 1005 00:26:36,433 --> 00:26:38,266 IN THE MOUNTAIN WEST, RANCHING 1006 00:26:38,333 --> 00:26:40,100 FAMILY, THAT IS WHERE I COME 1007 00:26:40,166 --> 00:26:40,900 FROM. 1008 00:26:40,966 --> 00:26:42,000 >> RANCHING FAMILY. 1009 00:26:42,066 --> 00:26:42,800 >> RANCHING FAMILY. 1010 00:26:42,866 --> 00:26:44,833 >> I REMEMBER GROWING UP ON THE 1011 00:26:44,900 --> 00:26:45,033 RANCH. 1012 00:26:45,100 --> 00:26:46,800 >> I LOVE EARLY MORNINGS, 1013 00:26:46,866 --> 00:26:47,700 GROWING UP ON A RANCH. 1014 00:26:47,766 --> 00:26:49,933 >> I GREW UP IN A CATTLE RANCH. 1015 00:26:50,000 --> 00:26:50,700 >> THE RANCH. 1016 00:26:50,766 --> 00:26:50,900 RANCH. 1017 00:26:50,966 --> 00:26:53,300 >> I WANT TO HEAR MORE ABOUT 1018 00:26:53,366 --> 00:26:54,533 THAT RANCH EXPERIENCE SOMEDAY, 1019 00:26:54,600 --> 00:26:56,133 DANA. 1020 00:26:56,200 --> 00:26:57,000 >> John: MOVING ON. 1021 00:26:57,066 --> 00:26:58,033 FINALLY TONIGHT, A QUICK WORD 1022 00:26:58,100 --> 00:26:59,133 ABOUT TWITTER, THE PLATFORM 1023 00:26:59,200 --> 00:27:02,300 WHERE HBO ONCE TWEETED THIS 1024 00:27:02,366 --> 00:27:03,500 POINTLESS LIST COMPARING THEIR 1025 00:27:03,566 --> 00:27:04,233 SHOWS TO DIFFERENT TYPES OF MILK 1026 00:27:04,300 --> 00:27:05,200 AND LEAVING US OUT. 1027 00:27:05,266 --> 00:27:05,800 WHICH IS RIDICULOUS. 1028 00:27:05,866 --> 00:27:06,766 WE EVEN RESPONDED AT THE TIME, 1029 00:27:06,833 --> 00:27:08,400 "WHY AREN'T WE MILK?" 1030 00:27:08,466 --> 00:27:09,500 AND WE NEVER HEARD BACK. 1031 00:27:09,566 --> 00:27:10,466 AND WHO IS MORE MILK IN 1032 00:27:10,533 --> 00:27:12,533 THE HBO UNIVERSE THAN THIS SHOW? 1033 00:27:12,600 --> 00:27:13,766 WE'RE BOTH BLAND, WHITE 1034 00:27:13,833 --> 00:27:14,666 SUBSTANCES THAT IF INGESTED 1035 00:27:14,733 --> 00:27:15,866 TOO QUICKLY WILL ABSOLUTELY 1036 00:27:15,933 --> 00:27:17,600 WRECK THE REST OF YOUR EVENING. 1037 00:27:17,666 --> 00:27:19,600 PLUS, EVERYTHING ABOUT MY VISUAL 1038 00:27:19,666 --> 00:27:20,700 APPEARANCE SCREAMS: 1039 00:27:20,766 --> 00:27:21,233 I WAS JUST SHOT OUT OF AN 1040 00:27:21,300 --> 00:27:24,133 UDDER. 1041 00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:25,600 WE'VE TALKED BEFORE ABOUT HOW 1042 00:27:25,666 --> 00:27:27,100 CORPORATIONS ROUTINELY FAIL TO 1043 00:27:27,166 --> 00:27:28,566 GET WHAT TWITTER SHOULD BE FOR 1044 00:27:28,633 --> 00:27:30,033 -- WHICH IS PICTURES OF LONG BOI 1045 00:27:30,100 --> 00:27:31,066 DUCKS AND PHOTOS OF GRITTY 1046 00:27:31,133 --> 00:27:32,533 HOLDING A ROCK TO HIS EAR AND 1047 00:27:32,600 --> 00:27:33,700 SAYING HE CAN HEAR THE OCEAN. 1048 00:27:33,766 --> 00:27:36,700 BUT IT'S NOT JUST CORPORATIONS. 1049 00:27:36,766 --> 00:27:38,066 GOVERNMENT ACCOUNTS CAN ALSO 1050 00:27:38,133 --> 00:27:39,600 BE DESPERATE TO APPEAR FUN ON 1051 00:27:39,666 --> 00:27:40,900 TWITTER. 1052 00:27:40,966 --> 00:27:42,333 TAKE THE U.S. CONSUMER PRODUCT 1053 00:27:42,400 --> 00:27:43,166 SAFETY COMMISSION. 1054 00:27:43,233 --> 00:27:45,200 ON WEDNESDAY, THEY TWEETED OUT 1055 00:27:45,266 --> 00:27:46,600 THIS IMAGE OF A KID ON THEIR 1056 00:27:46,666 --> 00:27:48,433 FATHER'S SHOULDERS, 1057 00:27:48,500 --> 00:27:49,866 LOOKING OUT AT A GIANT, 1058 00:27:49,933 --> 00:27:54,600 TENTACLED WASHING MACHINE, 1059 00:27:54,666 --> 00:27:55,533 WITH NO EXPLANATION BEYOND 1060 00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:56,666 THE CAPTION, "AMERICA." 1061 00:27:56,733 --> 00:27:57,800 THAT WASN'T EVEN THE WEIRDEST 1062 00:27:57,866 --> 00:27:58,666 THING THEY TWEETED THIS WEEK. 1063 00:27:58,733 --> 00:28:00,700 ON MONDAY, THEY TWEETED THIS 1064 00:28:00,766 --> 00:28:04,800 PICTURE OF A GIANT WASP IN A 1065 00:28:04,866 --> 00:28:05,600 FAMILY KITCHEN WITH THE CAPTION, 1066 00:28:05,666 --> 00:28:06,433 "IT'S NOT ALWAYS THIS EASY TO 1067 00:28:06,500 --> 00:28:07,133 FIND SOMETHING DANGEROUS 1068 00:28:07,200 --> 00:28:08,166 IN YOUR HOME. 1069 00:28:08,233 --> 00:28:09,200 CHECK FOR UNSAFE PRODUCTS ON 1070 00:28:09,266 --> 00:28:10,266 Safer.Products.gov." 1071 00:28:10,333 --> 00:28:11,433 AND GUESS WHAT HASHTAG THEY 1072 00:28:11,500 --> 00:28:12,766 INCLUDED? 1073 00:28:12,833 --> 00:28:14,533 LOOK AT THIS IMAGE CLOSELY AND 1074 00:28:14,600 --> 00:28:20,100 SAY YOUR GUESS OUT LOUD NOW. 1075 00:28:20,166 --> 00:28:21,166 YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY WRONG! 1076 00:28:21,233 --> 00:28:22,733 IT WAS #LesbianVisibilityDay. 1077 00:28:22,800 --> 00:28:24,333 AND LET'S AGREE: THAT'S 1078 00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:25,166 DEFINITELY THE REPRESENTATION 1079 00:28:25,233 --> 00:28:26,733 THE LESBIAN COMMUNITY HAS BEEN 1080 00:28:26,800 --> 00:28:28,233 LOOKING FOR -- A REMINDER THAT 1081 00:28:28,300 --> 00:28:29,900 THEY, TOO, CAN BE ATTACKED BY 1082 00:28:29,966 --> 00:28:30,966 RADIOACTIVE WASPS IN A 1083 00:28:31,033 --> 00:28:33,233 BLINDINGLY DULL KITCHEN. 1084 00:28:33,300 --> 00:28:37,833 YOU CAN'T BE WHAT YOU CAN'T SEE. 1085 00:28:37,900 --> 00:28:38,633 AND LOOK, I DO GET THEY'RE JUST 1086 00:28:38,700 --> 00:28:39,366 TRYING TO GO VIRAL. 1087 00:28:39,433 --> 00:28:40,866 BUT IT'S NOW HARD TO SEE ONE OF 1088 00:28:40,933 --> 00:28:42,000 THEIR SERIOUS TWEETS ABOUT 1089 00:28:42,066 --> 00:28:43,133 PRODUCT RECALLS, LIKE THIS ONE 1090 00:28:43,200 --> 00:28:44,800 FROM THURSDAY ABOUT A POOL 1091 00:28:44,866 --> 00:28:46,033 HEATER THAT CAN CATCH ON FIRE, 1092 00:28:46,100 --> 00:28:47,900 WITHOUT THINKING, "WHY IS THE 1093 00:28:47,966 --> 00:28:49,066 ACCOUNT THAT ONCE TWEETED THIS 1094 00:28:49,133 --> 00:28:50,300 PICTURE OF A CAT RIDING 1095 00:28:50,366 --> 00:28:51,133 A PEGASUS TRYING TO GIVE ME 1096 00:28:51,200 --> 00:28:52,466 SAFETY ADVICE? 1097 00:28:52,533 --> 00:28:55,133 PICK A FUCKING LANE." 1098 00:28:55,200 --> 00:28:56,566 EVEN THE CIA HAS TRIED TO 1099 00:28:56,633 --> 00:28:59,133 BE A FUN ONLINE PRESENCE, 1100 00:28:59,200 --> 00:29:01,300 WITH TWEETS LIKE THIS 1101 00:29:01,366 --> 00:29:02,300 "DECIPHER THE CODE" BRAIN 1102 00:29:02,366 --> 00:29:04,300 TEASER, THE ANSWER TO WHICH IS: 1103 00:29:04,366 --> 00:29:05,666 ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE. 1104 00:29:05,733 --> 00:29:07,233 HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY FROM 1105 00:29:07,300 --> 00:29:10,366 THE CIA TO YOU!" 1106 00:29:10,433 --> 00:29:12,466 WHICH NOT ONLY ISN'T CHARMING, 1107 00:29:12,533 --> 00:29:14,066 IT'S ALSO THE CODE PHRASE 1108 00:29:14,133 --> 00:29:15,100 TRIGGERING A UKRAINIAN SLEEPER 1109 00:29:15,166 --> 00:29:16,300 AGENT TO PICK UP HIS SNIPER 1110 00:29:16,366 --> 00:29:18,366 RIFLE AND GET TO WORK. 1111 00:29:18,433 --> 00:29:21,033 THE ONE GOVERNMENT ACCOUNT THAT 1112 00:29:21,100 --> 00:29:22,700 SEEMS TO KNOW WHAT IT'S DOING IS 1113 00:29:22,766 --> 00:29:24,733 NEW JERSEY'S STATE ACCOUNT, WHO 1114 00:29:24,800 --> 00:29:25,333 ONCE REPLIED TO THE QUESTION, 1115 00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:26,133 "WHO LET NEW JERSEY HAVE A 1116 00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:28,566 TWITTER?" 1117 00:29:28,633 --> 00:29:30,200 WITH THE ANSWER, "YOUR MOM." 1118 00:29:30,266 --> 00:29:31,233 AND ALSO REPLIED TO A TWEET 1119 00:29:31,300 --> 00:29:32,700 MAKING FUN OF THE STATE WITH, 1120 00:29:32,766 --> 00:29:36,833 "THAT'S NOT WHAT YOUR MOM SAID." 1121 00:29:36,900 --> 00:29:37,666 WHICH IS ABSOLUTELY EXCELLENT. 1122 00:29:37,733 --> 00:29:39,100 THEY KNOW WHAT THEIR BRAND IS: 1123 00:29:39,166 --> 00:29:40,433 14-YEAR-OLD WISEASS CLAIMING TO 1124 00:29:40,500 --> 00:29:41,900 HAVE PLOWED OUR MOTHERS NIGHTLY. 1125 00:29:41,966 --> 00:29:43,966 AND THEY EXECUTE IT WELL. 1126 00:29:44,033 --> 00:29:46,400 BUT PERHAPS THE SADDEST EXAMPLE 1127 00:29:46,466 --> 00:29:47,933 OF GOVERNMENT TWITTER IS THE 1128 00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:49,200 U.S. CYBER COMMAND'S NATIONAL 1129 00:29:49,266 --> 00:29:50,500 MISSION FORCE ACCOUNT, WHICH 1130 00:29:50,566 --> 00:29:52,233 LAST YEAR TWEETED THIS IMAGE OF 1131 00:29:52,300 --> 00:29:54,400 A RUSSIAN BEAR DROPPING CANDY, 1132 00:29:54,466 --> 00:29:56,000 LABELED WITH DIFFERENT TYPES OF 1133 00:29:56,066 --> 00:29:57,133 MALWARE. 1134 00:29:57,200 --> 00:29:58,200 AND WHAT EXACTLY WAS THE POINT 1135 00:29:58,266 --> 00:29:59,400 OF THIS? 1136 00:29:59,466 --> 00:30:01,200 DID THEY THINK THIS WOULD 1137 00:30:01,266 --> 00:30:03,333 GO VIRAL AND EVERYONE WOULD 1138 00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:04,766 SUDDENLY BE INTO CYBERSECURITY 1139 00:30:04,833 --> 00:30:06,633 ALERTS? 1140 00:30:06,700 --> 00:30:07,733 DID THEY THINK DRAKE WOULD 1141 00:30:07,800 --> 00:30:08,966 RETWEET IT WITH A BUNCH OF 1142 00:30:09,033 --> 00:30:10,333 FIRE EMOJIS? 1143 00:30:10,400 --> 00:30:11,266 OR THAT THE RUSSIAN GOVERNMENT 1144 00:30:11,333 --> 00:30:12,666 WOULD REPLY WITH, "FUCK, YOU GOT 1145 00:30:12,733 --> 00:30:15,233 US AGAIN!" 1146 00:30:15,300 --> 00:30:16,600 WELL, APPARENTLY, THE RATIONALE 1147 00:30:16,666 --> 00:30:18,400 WITHIN CYBER COMMAND WAS, 1148 00:30:18,466 --> 00:30:19,300 "RUSSIA HATES TO BE SEEN AS 1149 00:30:19,366 --> 00:30:21,033 CUDDLY OR COZY, SO WE WANT TO 1150 00:30:21,100 --> 00:30:22,233 TICK THEM OFF." 1151 00:30:22,300 --> 00:30:23,533 AND THEY TRIED TO DO THAT WITH 1152 00:30:23,600 --> 00:30:24,966 THIS MEME. 1153 00:30:25,033 --> 00:30:26,500 WHICH TOOK A DEPRESSING AMOUNT 1154 00:30:26,566 --> 00:30:28,000 OF EFFORT. 1155 00:30:28,066 --> 00:30:29,500 THANKS TO A FREEDOM OF 1156 00:30:29,566 --> 00:30:30,766 INFORMATION REQUEST, WE NOW KNOW 1157 00:30:30,833 --> 00:30:32,633 THAT, FROM START TO FINISH, 1158 00:30:32,700 --> 00:30:34,133 THE PICTURE OF THAT SOVIET BEAR 1159 00:30:34,200 --> 00:30:35,000 DROPPING MALWARE CANDY TOOK 1160 00:30:35,066 --> 00:30:37,300 22 DAYS. 1161 00:30:37,366 --> 00:30:38,600 22 DAYS! 1162 00:30:38,666 --> 00:30:41,866 FOR THAT! 1163 00:30:41,933 --> 00:30:42,766 THAT IS PATHETIC. 1164 00:30:42,833 --> 00:30:43,800 ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU CONSIDER 1165 00:30:43,866 --> 00:30:44,833 THAT, TO DATE, IT'S GOT 1166 00:30:44,900 --> 00:30:47,700 A GRAND TOTAL OF 441 LIKES. 1167 00:30:47,766 --> 00:30:51,533 22 DAYS FOR 441 LIKES. 1168 00:30:51,600 --> 00:30:53,366 THAT IS LESS THAN 1% OF 1169 00:30:53,433 --> 00:30:54,833 THE LIKES THAT HANK FROM 1170 00:30:54,900 --> 00:30:56,366 "BREAKING BAD" GOT FOR THIS 1171 00:30:56,433 --> 00:30:57,766 TWEET REVEALING THAT HE'S HORNY 1172 00:30:57,833 --> 00:30:59,733 FOR SEX GIFS. 1173 00:30:59,800 --> 00:31:02,766 THE POINT IS, GOVERNMENT TWITTER 1174 00:31:02,833 --> 00:31:03,766 ACCOUNTS, PLEASE, STOP TRYING TO 1175 00:31:03,833 --> 00:31:04,200 BE FUNNY. 1176 00:31:04,266 --> 00:31:06,366 STOP MAKING BAD MEMES. 1177 00:31:06,433 --> 00:31:07,300 STOP TRYING TO DUNK ON FOREIGN 1178 00:31:07,366 --> 00:31:08,766 ADVERSARIES. 1179 00:31:08,833 --> 00:31:10,366 AND STOP USING HASHTAGS WHERE 1180 00:31:10,433 --> 00:31:11,566 THEY'RE COMPLETELY IRRELEVANT. 1181 00:31:11,633 --> 00:31:13,966 IF YOU'RE GOING TO TAKE ANYTHING 1182 00:31:14,033 --> 00:31:15,533 AWAY FROM THIS, LET IT BE THAT 1183 00:31:15,600 --> 00:31:17,366 YOU'RE TRYING WAY TOO HARD, 1184 00:31:17,433 --> 00:31:19,133 AND THAT FOR SOME ABSOLUTELY 1185 00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:21,033 INEXPLICABLE REASON, 1186 00:31:21,100 --> 00:31:22,833 THIS SHOW IS NOT MILK. 1187 00:31:22,900 --> 00:31:25,200 WHY ARE WE NOT MILK? 1188 00:31:25,266 --> 00:31:26,400 THAT'S OUR SHOW, THANK YOU SO 1189 00:31:26,466 --> 00:31:30,000 MUCH FOR WATCHING. 1190 00:31:30,066 --> 00:31:30,600 WE'LL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK. 1191 00:31:30,666 --> 00:31:35,000 GOOD NIGHT! 1192 00:31:35,066 --> 00:31:45,433 [OCEAN WAVES AND SEAGULLS]