1 00:00:06,482 --> 00:00:08,233 [ROCK MUSIC] 2 00:00:08,233 --> 00:00:08,395 [ROCK MUSIC] 3 00:00:08,395 --> 00:00:15,202 ♪ ♪ 4 00:00:15,267 --> 00:00:22,074 ♪ ♪ 5 00:00:24,439 --> 00:00:30,696 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 6 00:00:30,696 --> 00:00:31,696 >> John: WELCOME, WELCOME, 7 00:00:31,733 --> 00:00:34,100 TO "LAST WEEK TONIGHT!" 8 00:00:34,100 --> 00:00:34,650 I'M JOHN OLIVER! 9 00:00:34,650 --> 00:00:35,650 THANK YOU SO MUCH 10 00:00:35,650 --> 00:00:36,109 FOR JOINING US! 11 00:00:36,109 --> 00:00:37,470 IT HAS BEEN A BUSY WEEK. 12 00:00:37,690 --> 00:00:39,270 EUROPE SUFFERED A BRUTAL HEAT 13 00:00:39,270 --> 00:00:40,390 WAVE, THERE WERE MASSIVE 14 00:00:40,390 --> 00:00:41,350 EARTHQUAKES IN VENEZUELA, 15 00:00:41,350 --> 00:00:42,890 AND IN D.C., THE GREAT 16 00:00:42,890 --> 00:00:44,330 AMERICAN STATE FAIR OPENED, 17 00:00:44,330 --> 00:00:45,350 WITH ATTRACTIONS INCLUDING 18 00:00:45,350 --> 00:00:47,190 BULL RIDING, A FERRIS WHEEL, 19 00:00:47,370 --> 00:00:48,570 AND A SPEECH FROM DONALD TRUMP, 20 00:00:48,630 --> 00:00:49,770 WHICH ONE FAN IN PARTICULAR 21 00:00:49,770 --> 00:00:51,650 WAS VERY EXCITED ABOUT. 22 00:00:51,970 --> 00:00:55,410 >> TODAY WILL BE MY 116TH TRUMP 23 00:00:55,410 --> 00:00:55,785 RALLY. 24 00:00:55,785 --> 00:00:57,378 >> PEOPLE ARE SAYING THAT THIS 25 00:00:57,433 --> 00:00:58,433 SHOULDN'T BE A TRUMP RALLY, THAT 26 00:00:58,550 --> 00:01:00,270 THIS SHOULD BE A NON-POLITICAL 27 00:01:00,270 --> 00:01:00,710 EVENT. 28 00:01:00,710 --> 00:01:01,430 WHAT DO YOU MAKE OF ALL THAT? 29 00:01:01,430 --> 00:01:02,190 >> OH, I THINK WISH THEY WOULD 30 00:01:02,190 --> 00:01:03,349 JUST SHUT UP. 31 00:01:03,430 --> 00:01:04,489 HE'S THE PRESIDENT. 32 00:01:04,730 --> 00:01:05,849 LIKE LAST WEEK, IT WAS THE 33 00:01:05,849 --> 00:01:06,849 PRESIDENT'S BIRTHDAY. 34 00:01:07,010 --> 00:01:08,170 IF HE WANTS TO HAVE SOME 35 00:01:08,170 --> 00:01:10,230 BARE-KNUCKLE BOXING ON THE WHITE 36 00:01:10,230 --> 00:01:11,770 HOUSE LAWN AND PEOPLE KICKING 37 00:01:11,770 --> 00:01:13,710 EACH OTHER IN THE FACES, FINE! 38 00:01:14,312 --> 00:01:17,341 GREAT! 39 00:01:17,341 --> 00:01:17,783 >> John: THAT IS AN INTERESTING 40 00:01:17,783 --> 00:01:18,330 TAKE! 41 00:01:18,330 --> 00:01:18,709 THOUGH I'M NOT SURE HE'S THE 42 00:01:18,709 --> 00:01:19,276 PERSON TO TRUST ON WHETHER OR 43 00:01:19,276 --> 00:01:21,128 NOT TRUMP IS OVERDOING IT, GIVEN 44 00:01:21,350 --> 00:01:22,530 THAT IT SEEMS HE WOKE UP THAT 45 00:01:22,530 --> 00:01:24,310 MORNING, PUT ONE HAT ON HIS HEAD 46 00:01:24,350 --> 00:01:26,850 AND SAID, "NOPE, THAT'S NOT 47 00:01:26,850 --> 00:01:27,850 ENOUGH." 48 00:01:29,189 --> 00:01:31,010 ALSO 116 TRUMP RALLIES? 49 00:01:31,490 --> 00:01:33,070 I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THERE'D BEEN 50 00:01:33,070 --> 00:01:33,950 THAT MANY OF THEM. 51 00:01:33,950 --> 00:01:35,410 I KNOW TRUMP'S BEEN ALIVE FOR 52 00:01:35,410 --> 00:01:36,509 A LONG TIME, BUT NOWADAYS HE'S 53 00:01:36,509 --> 00:01:37,950 MOSTLY ASLEEP AND HAS DOCTOR'S 54 00:01:38,679 --> 00:01:39,679 APPOINTMENTS APPROXIMATELY 450 55 00:01:39,702 --> 00:01:41,219 DAYS OUT OF THE YEAR. 56 00:01:41,289 --> 00:01:43,009 WHERE DOES HE FIND THE TIME? 57 00:01:43,370 --> 00:01:44,470 BUT THE STATE FAIR WASN'T THE 58 00:01:44,470 --> 00:01:45,870 ONLY CENTER OF ATTENTION IN D.C. 59 00:01:45,870 --> 00:01:46,250 THIS WEEK. 60 00:01:46,250 --> 00:01:47,830 BECAUSE NOT FAR FROM IT, ANOTHER 61 00:01:47,830 --> 00:01:49,030 OF TRUMP'S PET PROJECTS 62 00:01:49,030 --> 00:01:50,408 CONTINUED TO UNRAVEL. 63 00:01:50,485 --> 00:01:52,705 >> THE NATION'S REFLECTING POOL 64 00:01:52,783 --> 00:01:53,951 THE SUBJECT OF INTENSE FOCUS IN 65 00:01:54,390 --> 00:01:55,590 PRESIDENT TRUMP'S ONGOING 66 00:01:55,590 --> 00:01:57,690 CAMPAIGN TO REFRESH WASHINGTON 67 00:01:57,870 --> 00:01:59,810 D.C., IS STILL LOOKING MORE 68 00:01:59,810 --> 00:02:02,630 ALGAE GREEN THAN AMERICA BLUE. 69 00:02:02,741 --> 00:02:03,981 >> THERE'S LOTS OF GREEN, AND IT 70 00:02:04,092 --> 00:02:07,696 SMELLS REALLY BAD. 71 00:02:07,696 --> 00:02:08,696 >> John: YEAH. 72 00:02:08,708 --> 00:02:09,835 "THERE'S A LOT OF GREEN 73 00:02:09,946 --> 00:02:11,916 AND IT SMELLS REALLY BAD." 74 00:02:12,030 --> 00:02:13,570 IT'S NEVER A GREAT SIGN WHEN THE 75 00:02:13,570 --> 00:02:14,490 FEEDBACK FOR YOUR NATIONAL 76 00:02:14,490 --> 00:02:15,850 MONUMENT SOUNDS EXACTLY LIKE 77 00:02:15,850 --> 00:02:16,870 A REVIEW FOR SEX WITH 78 00:02:16,870 --> 00:02:17,870 THE GRINCH. 79 00:02:18,090 --> 00:02:19,350 "GREEN, SMELLY. 80 00:02:19,450 --> 00:02:20,530 GOOD COMMUNICATOR, THOUGH! 81 00:02:20,630 --> 00:02:21,630 THREE STARS." 82 00:02:22,190 --> 00:02:23,550 TRUMP'S RENOVATION OF THE 83 00:02:23,550 --> 00:02:24,850 LINCOLN MEMORIAL REFLECTING POOL 84 00:02:24,850 --> 00:02:25,950 CONTINUES TO BE AN ABSOLUTE 85 00:02:25,950 --> 00:02:26,707 TRAINWRECK. 86 00:02:26,707 --> 00:02:27,250 IT'S BEEN PLAGUED BY 87 00:02:27,250 --> 00:02:28,310 ENORMOUS BLOOMS OF ALGAE 88 00:02:28,310 --> 00:02:29,910 LARGE CHUNKS OF BLUE SEALANT 89 00:02:29,910 --> 00:02:30,990 HAVE BEEN PEELING OFF, AND JUST 90 00:02:30,990 --> 00:02:32,850 THIS WEEK A TRIO OF DEAD DUCKS 91 00:02:32,850 --> 00:02:33,990 WERE DISCOVERED THERE, PROMPTING 92 00:02:34,430 --> 00:02:35,590 A SPOKESPERSON FOR THE CENTER 93 00:02:35,590 --> 00:02:36,950 FOR BIOLOGICAL DIVERSITY TO SAY 94 00:02:36,950 --> 00:02:38,329 TRUMP WAS "WASTING TAXPAYER 95 00:02:38,525 --> 00:02:39,525 MONEY TURNING THE REFLECTING 96 00:02:39,525 --> 00:02:39,947 POOL INTO A GIANT DUCK 97 00:02:39,947 --> 00:02:41,975 DEATH TRAP". 98 00:02:42,030 --> 00:02:43,910 WHICH IS CLEARLY AWFUL. 99 00:02:44,090 --> 00:02:44,990 DUCKS SHOULDN'T HAVE TO WORRY 100 00:02:44,990 --> 00:02:46,269 ABOUT GETTING MURDERED BY THE 101 00:02:46,269 --> 00:02:47,269 REFLECTING POOL. 102 00:02:47,630 --> 00:02:48,490 THEY SHOULD BE WORRIED ABOUT 103 00:02:48,490 --> 00:02:49,490 GETTING SHOT BY A HUNTER, 104 00:02:49,730 --> 00:02:50,810 GETTING EATEN BY A PREDATOR, 105 00:02:51,010 --> 00:02:52,190 OR GETTING TEASED BY ME 106 00:02:52,190 --> 00:02:53,769 FOR HAVING A CORKSCREW-SHAPED 107 00:02:53,769 --> 00:02:54,630 PENIS. 108 00:02:54,630 --> 00:02:56,070 AS WE'VE MENTIONED REPEATEDLY 109 00:02:56,070 --> 00:02:57,790 BEFORE, ALL MALE DUCKS HAVE 110 00:02:57,790 --> 00:02:58,829 THEM, INCLUDING DONALD. 111 00:02:59,889 --> 00:03:02,189 PUT SOME PANTS ON, YOU PERVERT! 112 00:03:02,310 --> 00:03:03,430 AND SHOW SOME DIGNITY. 113 00:03:03,690 --> 00:03:04,810 YOUR NEPHEWS ARE DEAD. 114 00:03:05,269 --> 00:03:07,269 THEY DIED IN THE REFLECTING 115 00:03:07,269 --> 00:03:08,269 POOL, DONALD! 116 00:03:08,930 --> 00:03:10,850 MAY THEIR MEMORY BE A BLESSING. 117 00:03:11,709 --> 00:03:13,329 AND IN RESPONSE TO ALL THIS 118 00:03:13,430 --> 00:03:14,750 TRUMP SHIFTED INTO FULL 119 00:03:14,750 --> 00:03:16,190 BLAME-DEFLECTION MODE THIS WEEK 120 00:03:16,310 --> 00:03:17,910 CLAIMING THERE'D BEEN SABOTAGE 121 00:03:17,910 --> 00:03:19,290 AND RAILING ON SOCIAL MEDIA 122 00:03:19,290 --> 00:03:20,230 AGAINST A QUOTE 123 00:03:20,230 --> 00:03:21,510 "CRAZY PRO-ALGAE -- 124 00:03:21,530 --> 00:03:22,248 LIKELY PAID -- 125 00:03:22,248 --> 00:03:24,076 PROTESTOR". 126 00:03:24,076 --> 00:03:25,690 WHICH IS FUNNY EVEN BEFORE YOU 127 00:03:25,690 --> 00:03:26,709 REALIZE HE'S REFERRING TO 128 00:03:26,709 --> 00:03:28,450 THIS FRANKLY EXCELLENT FROG. 129 00:03:30,149 --> 00:03:32,070 AS FOR THAT PEELING LINER, TRUMP 130 00:03:32,070 --> 00:03:33,190 OFFERED THIS EXPLANATION. 131 00:03:33,810 --> 00:03:36,550 >> WE HAVE A, I THINK, 290, 132 00:03:37,070 --> 00:03:39,610 300-FOOT SLIT RIGHT THROUGH IT. 133 00:03:39,630 --> 00:03:41,570 PROBABLY A BOX CUTTER OR A KNIFE 134 00:03:41,570 --> 00:03:42,300 OF SOME KIND. 135 00:03:42,300 --> 00:03:43,402 >> NATIONAL GUARD AND POLICE 136 00:03:43,453 --> 00:03:44,938 HAVE BEEN ALL OVER THE MALL. 137 00:03:44,990 --> 00:03:46,190 HOW WOULD THESE VANDALS HAVE 138 00:03:46,190 --> 00:03:47,790 GOTTEN SO CLOSE TO DO SOMETHING 139 00:03:47,790 --> 00:03:48,425 LIKE THAT? 140 00:03:48,425 --> 00:03:49,074 >> DO YOU HAVE ANY PROOF OF 141 00:03:49,074 --> 00:03:49,311 THIS? 142 00:03:49,311 --> 00:03:51,610 >> I MEAN, WE DIDN'T HAVE A LOT 143 00:03:51,610 --> 00:03:52,110 OF THEM THEN. 144 00:03:52,110 --> 00:03:53,089 WHO WOULD THINK THAT SOMEBODY 145 00:03:53,089 --> 00:03:54,470 WOULD GO INTO A POOL AND TAKE 146 00:03:54,470 --> 00:03:55,709 A KNIFE AND START CUTTING IT? 147 00:03:55,709 --> 00:03:56,194 >> BUT DO YOU HAVE PROOF OF 148 00:03:56,194 --> 00:03:56,348 THAT? 149 00:03:56,348 --> 00:03:57,421 THAT THEY USED A KNIFE? 150 00:03:57,421 --> 00:03:57,958 DO YOU HAVE PHOTOS OR VIDEOS? 151 00:03:57,958 --> 00:03:58,649 >> YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. 152 00:03:58,649 --> 00:04:00,030 WELL, LET'S PUT IT THIS WAY. 153 00:04:00,589 --> 00:04:02,530 WHEN YOU HAVE A 350, I THINK 154 00:04:02,530 --> 00:04:05,329 IT'S 350, NOT 250, A 350-FOOT 155 00:04:06,030 --> 00:04:08,110 SLIT FROM ONE END TO THE OTHER. 156 00:04:08,590 --> 00:04:09,590 YOU THINK THAT'S PROOF? 157 00:04:09,736 --> 00:04:12,207 >> John: NO! 158 00:04:12,274 --> 00:04:13,274 NO I DON'T. 159 00:04:13,290 --> 00:04:14,930 SO, OVER THE COURSE OF A MINUTE, 160 00:04:15,089 --> 00:04:17,329 THAT SLIT GREW FROM 290 TO 300 161 00:04:17,329 --> 00:04:19,930 TO 350 FEET, DEPENDING ON HOW 162 00:04:19,930 --> 00:04:21,450 PRONE TO EXAGGERATION TRUMP FELT 163 00:04:21,450 --> 00:04:22,589 AT ANY GIVEN SECOND. 164 00:04:22,750 --> 00:04:24,250 NOW, EXPERTS HAVE NOTED THE 165 00:04:27,668 --> 00:04:28,668 THE MORE LIKELY EXPLANATION IS 166 00:04:28,668 --> 00:04:28,805 APPARENTLY THAT THE REPAIRS WERE 167 00:04:28,805 --> 00:04:29,005 IT WILL BE CHALLENGING TO CUT APPARENTLY THAT THE REPAIRS WERE 168 00:04:29,005 --> 00:04:29,294 APPARENTLY THAT THE REPAIRS WERE 169 00:04:29,294 --> 00:04:30,294 "JUST DONE TOO HASTILY" AND IT 170 00:04:30,450 --> 00:04:31,870 MAY NOT HAVE HELPED THAT, DURING 171 00:04:31,870 --> 00:04:34,290 THEM, TRUMP DROVE OVER THE POOL 172 00:04:34,290 --> 00:04:35,409 IN HIS MOTORCADE. 173 00:04:35,970 --> 00:04:38,230 AND YET, TRUMP KEPT PUSHING THE 174 00:04:38,230 --> 00:04:39,409 "SABOTAGE" CONSPIRACY, AND HIS 175 00:04:39,409 --> 00:04:40,970 SUPPORTERS TRIED TO SELL IT 176 00:04:41,030 --> 00:04:42,630 EVEN WHEN THE EVIDENCE WAS 177 00:04:42,630 --> 00:04:43,909 JUST LAUGHABLY WEAK. 178 00:04:43,990 --> 00:04:45,269 >> WE HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO 179 00:04:45,349 --> 00:04:46,469 VERIFY THE VIDEO, BUT TAKE 180 00:04:46,549 --> 00:04:47,669 A LOOK. 181 00:04:47,750 --> 00:04:50,010 JUNE 19TH, A MALE, BLUE SHIRT, 182 00:04:50,490 --> 00:04:52,370 REACHES IN, STAYS THERE 183 00:04:52,370 --> 00:04:53,050 FOR A LITTLE WHILE. 184 00:04:53,050 --> 00:04:54,690 HE GOES BACK DOWN, 185 00:04:54,690 --> 00:04:55,550 COMES BACK UP. 186 00:04:55,550 --> 00:04:56,550 MULTIPLE TIMES. 187 00:04:56,909 --> 00:04:57,909 WHAT'S HE DOING? 188 00:04:58,569 --> 00:05:01,269 THEN A FEMALE, WHITE TOTE BAG. 189 00:05:01,590 --> 00:05:03,650 SHE REACHES IN, NEEDS A BETTER 190 00:05:03,650 --> 00:05:06,349 ANGLE, SETS THE BAG DOWN, DIVES 191 00:05:06,349 --> 00:05:07,349 IN A LITTLE DEEPER. 192 00:05:07,930 --> 00:05:08,650 WE DON'T KNOW WHO 193 00:05:08,650 --> 00:05:09,650 THESE PEOPLE ARE. 194 00:05:09,830 --> 00:05:11,310 NO ONE WAS STOPPED OR QUESTIONED 195 00:05:11,310 --> 00:05:13,570 BY POLICE, SO NO ARRESTS. 196 00:05:14,070 --> 00:05:15,110 AND WE DON'T HAVE THE POLICE 197 00:05:15,110 --> 00:05:16,170 REPORT YET. 198 00:05:16,590 --> 00:05:17,970 BUT WHAT ARE THEY DOING WITH 199 00:05:17,970 --> 00:05:18,970 THEIR HANDS IN THE POOL? 200 00:05:19,250 --> 00:05:20,569 ARE THEY CUTTING THE LINING? 201 00:05:21,069 --> 00:05:22,469 ARE THEY PEELING OFF THE PAINT? 202 00:05:23,270 --> 00:05:24,190 WE DON'T KNOW IF THEY'RE 203 00:05:24,190 --> 00:05:25,190 COMMITTING A CRIME. 204 00:05:25,570 --> 00:05:26,670 THEY'LL PROBABLY TELL YOU THEY 205 00:05:26,670 --> 00:05:27,644 DROPPED THEIR WEDDING RING. 206 00:05:27,644 --> 00:05:29,853 >> John: WAIT. 207 00:05:29,909 --> 00:05:31,709 IS THAT THE BEST YOU'VE GOT? 208 00:05:32,050 --> 00:05:33,529 THAT IS PATHETIC! 209 00:05:33,890 --> 00:05:35,170 AS FOR "THEY'LL PROBABLY TELL 210 00:05:35,170 --> 00:05:36,090 YOU THEY DROPPED THEIR WEDDING 211 00:05:36,090 --> 00:05:37,390 RING" -- YEAH, MAYBE THEY DID! 212 00:05:37,630 --> 00:05:38,630 MAYBE THOSE PEOPLE AT THE 213 00:05:38,750 --> 00:05:40,070 REFLECTING POOL DROPPED THEIR 214 00:05:40,070 --> 00:05:41,150 WEDDING RING AFTER LEAVING THEIR 215 00:05:41,459 --> 00:05:42,899 WIFE FOR A 25-YEAR-OLD COWORKER. 216 00:05:42,970 --> 00:05:44,490 JESSE WOULD KNOW WHAT THAT'S 217 00:05:44,490 --> 00:05:45,210 LIKE! 218 00:05:45,210 --> 00:05:47,250 IT'S ACTUALLY ONE OF MANY FUN 219 00:05:47,250 --> 00:05:48,530 FACTS YOU CAN LEARN ON HIS 220 00:05:48,530 --> 00:05:49,709 WIKIPEDIA PAGE, ALONG WITH 221 00:05:49,709 --> 00:05:51,329 "IN NOVEMBER 2024, WATTERS 222 00:05:51,329 --> 00:05:53,170 STATED HE HAD NOT BEEN INVITED 223 00:05:53,170 --> 00:05:54,170 TO HIS MOTHER'S HOME FOR 224 00:05:54,170 --> 00:05:54,930 THANKSGIVING." 225 00:05:54,930 --> 00:05:56,890 AND I DO NOT BLAME HIS MOM 226 00:05:56,890 --> 00:05:57,430 FOR THAT. 227 00:05:57,430 --> 00:05:58,750 SHE'S A CHILD PSYCHOLOGIST 228 00:05:58,930 --> 00:05:59,930 AND SHE TRIED HER BEST. 229 00:06:00,050 --> 00:06:01,229 SOMETIMES YOU JUST 230 00:06:01,229 --> 00:06:02,430 GET ONE THAT SUCKS. 231 00:06:02,504 --> 00:06:04,128 THOUGH IT DOES NOW MAKES MUCH 232 00:06:04,204 --> 00:06:06,620 MORE SENSE THAT JESSE WILL 233 00:06:06,696 --> 00:06:08,168 HUMILIATE HIMSELF PURSUING THE 234 00:06:08,244 --> 00:06:09,452 APPROVAL OF A WITHHOLDING 235 00:06:09,452 --> 00:06:10,170 PARENTAL FIGURE 236 00:06:10,170 --> 00:06:11,150 THAT'LL SIMPLY NEVER COME. 237 00:06:11,150 --> 00:06:12,630 AND SADLY, HE'LL DIE STARVING 238 00:06:12,630 --> 00:06:13,870 FOR IT WHILE HIS MOM SPENDS 239 00:06:13,870 --> 00:06:14,949 THANKSGIVING IN A WARM HOME 240 00:06:14,949 --> 00:06:16,670 SURROUNDED BY PEOPLE SHE LOVES. 241 00:06:16,990 --> 00:06:18,629 IT'S BASICALLY A CHRISTMAS CAROL 242 00:06:18,670 --> 00:06:19,870 IF SCROOGE HAD IGNORED ALL THE 243 00:06:19,870 --> 00:06:20,909 GHOSTS, EVEN THOUGH ONE WAS 244 00:06:20,909 --> 00:06:22,349 LITERALLY HIS MOM. 245 00:06:23,530 --> 00:06:24,530 MEANWHILE THE ADMINISTRATION'S 246 00:06:24,630 --> 00:06:25,820 BEEN TRYING TO FIX THINGS BY 247 00:06:25,820 --> 00:06:27,210 PUMPING OUT THE ALGAE AND 248 00:06:27,210 --> 00:06:28,270 POURING IN JUGS OF HYDROGEN 249 00:06:28,490 --> 00:06:29,330 PEROXIDE. 250 00:06:29,330 --> 00:06:30,970 BUT IT IS NOW AT THE POINT WHERE 251 00:06:30,970 --> 00:06:32,229 THE NATIONAL GUARD HAVE 252 00:06:32,229 --> 00:06:33,950 STEPPED UP PATROLS OF THE AREA, 253 00:06:34,090 --> 00:06:35,229 AND FENCING HAS BEEN PUT UP 254 00:06:35,229 --> 00:06:35,870 AROUND THE POOL. 255 00:06:35,870 --> 00:06:37,430 IN FACT, WHEN YOU GOOGLE IT NOW 256 00:06:37,570 --> 00:06:38,890 YOU'LL FIND THIS LABEL SAYING 257 00:06:38,996 --> 00:06:41,339 IT IS "TEMPORARILY CLOSED" 258 00:06:41,450 --> 00:06:42,590 LIKE IT'S A CHIPOTLE 259 00:06:42,590 --> 00:06:43,470 THAT THE HEALTH DEPARTMENT 260 00:06:43,470 --> 00:06:44,370 SHUT DOWN AFTER FINDING 261 00:06:44,370 --> 00:06:45,849 A DEAD MOUSE IN THE GUAC. 262 00:06:46,550 --> 00:06:48,409 AND THE ADMINISTRATION IS STILL 263 00:06:48,409 --> 00:06:50,270 REFUSING TO QUESTION WHETHER ANY 264 00:06:50,270 --> 00:06:51,330 OF THIS MIGHT'VE BEEN THE FAULT 265 00:06:51,330 --> 00:06:52,330 OF THE COMPANIES THEY GAVE 266 00:06:52,330 --> 00:06:53,930 CONTRACTS TO -- A HIRING PROCESS 267 00:06:53,930 --> 00:06:56,349 THAT ITSELF NOW SEEMS PRETTY 268 00:06:56,349 --> 00:06:56,959 QUESTIONABLE. 269 00:06:56,959 --> 00:06:59,374 >> REPAIRS ARE ADDING TO THE 270 00:06:59,445 --> 00:07:00,617 ALREADY OVER-BUDGET PROJECT 271 00:07:00,689 --> 00:07:02,889 TOTALING MORE THAN $16 MILLION 272 00:07:02,890 --> 00:07:04,190 AFTER A PAIR OF NO-BID 273 00:07:04,190 --> 00:07:04,890 CONTRACTS. 274 00:07:04,890 --> 00:07:05,810 >> ONE OF THOSE COMPANIES? 275 00:07:05,810 --> 00:07:08,049 GREEN WATER SERVICES. 276 00:07:08,110 --> 00:07:10,050 THE WHITE HOUSE DENIED ANY ROLE 277 00:07:10,050 --> 00:07:11,050 IN THE COMPANY'S HIRING. 278 00:07:11,310 --> 00:07:12,930 BUT LAST YEAR, GREENWATER DID 279 00:07:12,930 --> 00:07:15,070 WORK AT MR. TRUMP'S BEDMINSTER 280 00:07:15,070 --> 00:07:16,070 GOLF CLUB. 281 00:07:16,090 --> 00:07:17,630 THE COMPANY IS OWNED BY A TRUST 282 00:07:17,630 --> 00:07:19,089 RUN BY REPUBLICAN DONOR 283 00:07:19,089 --> 00:07:20,089 JOHN CAFARO. 284 00:07:20,157 --> 00:07:22,932 >> John: LOOK. 285 00:07:23,002 --> 00:07:24,250 [LAUGHTER] 286 00:07:24,320 --> 00:07:26,820 WHEN PEOPLE SAY "DOESN'T TRUMP 287 00:07:26,820 --> 00:07:28,099 MAKE YOUR JOB AS A COMEDIAN 288 00:07:28,099 --> 00:07:28,700 EASIER?" 289 00:07:28,700 --> 00:07:30,080 THIS IS WHY THE ANSWER IS 290 00:07:30,080 --> 00:07:30,880 ACTUALLY NO. 291 00:07:30,880 --> 00:07:32,659 BECAUSE HOW CAN I MAKE THAT 292 00:07:32,659 --> 00:07:34,340 FUNNIER THAN IT ALREADY IS? 293 00:07:34,979 --> 00:07:36,780 THEY GAVE THE POOL JOB TO A 294 00:07:36,780 --> 00:07:38,320 TRUMP CRONY WHOSE COMPANY IS 295 00:07:38,320 --> 00:07:39,699 LITERALLY CALLED "GREEN WATER" 296 00:07:40,440 --> 00:07:41,780 AND WHO LOOKS LIKE HE MANAGES 297 00:07:41,780 --> 00:07:42,780 THE UNDERTAKER. 298 00:07:42,819 --> 00:07:43,819 COME ON! 299 00:07:44,299 --> 00:07:46,620 NO LIVING PERSON LOOKS LIKE 300 00:07:46,620 --> 00:07:47,599 THIS! 301 00:07:47,599 --> 00:07:48,760 HE LOOKS LIKE THE RESPONSE TO AN 302 00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:50,140 AI PROMPT OF, "WHAT IF THE 303 00:07:50,140 --> 00:07:51,220 CONCEPT OF RACKETEERING 304 00:07:51,220 --> 00:07:52,220 WAS A PERSON?" 305 00:07:52,759 --> 00:07:54,399 AND EVEN THAT IS BARELY A JOKE 306 00:07:54,460 --> 00:07:55,780 GIVEN THAT MAN ACTUALLY WAS 307 00:07:55,780 --> 00:07:57,760 CONVICTED OF CONSPIRACY TO BRIBE 308 00:07:57,760 --> 00:07:58,760 A CONGRESSMAN. 309 00:07:58,820 --> 00:07:59,780 YOU KNOW WHAT? 310 00:07:59,780 --> 00:08:00,539 I GIVE UP. 311 00:08:00,539 --> 00:08:01,859 MUCH LIKE DONALD TRUMP WHEN 312 00:08:01,859 --> 00:08:02,940 "THE ART OF THE DEAL" WAS BEING 313 00:08:02,940 --> 00:08:04,419 WRITTEN, I AM SIMPLY NOT 314 00:08:04,419 --> 00:08:05,419 CONTRIBUTING. 315 00:08:06,099 --> 00:08:08,080 ANYWAY, I KNOW THIS IS FAR FROM 316 00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:08,820 THE MOST IMPORTANT THING 317 00:08:08,820 --> 00:08:09,820 HAPPENING IN AMERICA RIGHT NOW, 318 00:08:09,840 --> 00:08:11,846 BUT IT IS STRIKING THAT, EVEN AS 319 00:08:11,846 --> 00:08:15,744 THIS COUNTRY CELEBRATES TURNING 320 00:08:15,818 --> 00:08:16,890 250, ITS CAPITOL CITY IS DEALING 321 00:08:16,890 --> 00:08:17,432 WITH A LITERAL SWAMP OF 322 00:08:17,432 --> 00:08:18,460 CORRUPTION, THERE ARE DEAD DUCKS 323 00:08:18,460 --> 00:08:18,500 TO 324 00:08:18,500 --> 00:08:19,859 IN THE LINCOLN REFLECTING POOL, 325 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:20,919 AND PEOPLE ARE KICKING 326 00:08:20,919 --> 00:08:21,879 EACH OTHER IN THE FACE 327 00:08:21,879 --> 00:08:23,000 ON THE WHITE HOUSE LAWN. 328 00:08:23,559 --> 00:08:25,220 THE SYMBOLISM HERE IS PRETTY 329 00:08:25,220 --> 00:08:25,780 HARD TO MISS. 330 00:08:25,780 --> 00:08:27,460 IN FACT, AS METAPHORS FOR THE 331 00:08:27,460 --> 00:08:28,380 CURRENT STATE OF THINGS IN 332 00:08:28,380 --> 00:08:29,740 AMERICA GO, ALL OF THAT IS -- 333 00:08:30,020 --> 00:08:31,780 MUCH LIKE THE SARTORIAL SENSE OF 334 00:08:31,780 --> 00:08:32,938 THE PRESIDENT'S BIGGEST FAN -- 335 00:08:33,318 --> 00:08:35,399 A HAT ON A FUCKING HAT. 336 00:08:35,960 --> 00:08:37,360 AND NOW THIS. 337 00:08:37,423 --> 00:08:39,270 >> Announcer: AND NOW THE 338 00:08:39,335 --> 00:08:42,615 DELIGHTFUL REPORT OF JEREMY RAVE 339 00:08:42,679 --> 00:08:43,818 AND TOM. 340 00:08:43,818 --> 00:08:44,219 >> WELCOME. 341 00:08:44,219 --> 00:08:45,822 I AM JEREMY RAVE. 342 00:08:45,889 --> 00:08:48,327 >> I AM TOM TURTON. 343 00:08:48,394 --> 00:08:49,394 >> YOU ARE. 344 00:08:49,396 --> 00:08:50,431 >> I AM AND I HAVE BEEN FOR A 345 00:08:50,431 --> 00:08:50,899 WHILE. 346 00:08:50,899 --> 00:08:53,100 YOU ARE FLASHING TODAY IN 347 00:08:53,100 --> 00:08:53,887 COLORFUL. 348 00:08:53,887 --> 00:08:55,185 >> HERE'S THE THING. 349 00:08:55,279 --> 00:08:56,279 GUESS WHAT. 350 00:08:56,279 --> 00:08:57,939 SATURDAY IS VALENTINE'S DAY. 351 00:08:58,002 --> 00:08:59,372 >> IT IS? 352 00:08:59,436 --> 00:09:01,283 >> FIVE PEOPLE WHOSE FIRST NAMES 353 00:09:01,347 --> 00:09:03,195 SHARE A FIRST NAME AND IT 354 00:09:03,259 --> 00:09:04,259 CREATES A NEW PERSON. 355 00:09:04,519 --> 00:09:05,519 DOES THAT MAKE SENSE? 356 00:09:05,519 --> 00:09:07,419 >> NO BUT I'LL JUMP IN. 357 00:09:07,507 --> 00:09:10,055 >> IT'S TIME TO CELEBRATE SOME 358 00:09:10,143 --> 00:09:12,033 CELEBRITY BIRTHDAYS. 359 00:09:12,120 --> 00:09:13,240 I DID NOT CHEAT TODAY. 360 00:09:13,240 --> 00:09:13,630 DID YOU? 361 00:09:13,630 --> 00:09:16,106 >> I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WE WERE 362 00:09:16,177 --> 00:09:18,229 DOING IT. 363 00:09:18,300 --> 00:09:19,467 >> OKAY IT'S TIME FOR A ROUND OF 364 00:09:19,539 --> 00:09:22,475 WOULD YOU RATHER? 365 00:09:22,546 --> 00:09:23,546 >> I'D RATHER NOT. 366 00:09:23,546 --> 00:09:24,315 >> OKAY. 367 00:09:24,315 --> 00:09:26,191 GO TO BREAK. 368 00:09:26,261 --> 00:09:27,430 >> MY PLANTS HAVE NOT RECOVERED 369 00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:29,000 FROM THE COLD SNAP WE HAD LAST 370 00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:29,439 WEEK. 371 00:09:29,439 --> 00:09:30,500 THEY LOOK TERRIBLE. 372 00:09:30,659 --> 00:09:31,659 I'M REALLY WORRIED. 373 00:09:31,733 --> 00:09:35,373 >> HAVE YOU GOT BAD PLANTS. 374 00:09:35,446 --> 00:09:37,304 >> I LOVE SCHMIGADOON. 375 00:09:37,379 --> 00:09:38,480 HAVE YOU SEEN THE TV SHOW? 376 00:09:38,779 --> 00:09:40,539 DID YOU SEE THE MOVIE "BARBIE" 377 00:09:40,575 --> 00:09:42,222 WITH MARCO ROBBIE GUEST SPEAKER 378 00:09:42,259 --> 00:09:43,259 ABSOLUTELY NOT. 379 00:09:49,059 --> 00:09:50,740 >> I HAVE NO ARGUMENT. 380 00:09:50,815 --> 00:09:54,083 >> John: MOVING ON. 381 00:09:54,160 --> 00:09:55,620 OUR MAIN STORY TONIGHT CONCERNS 382 00:09:55,620 --> 00:09:56,220 VOTING. 383 00:09:56,220 --> 00:09:57,460 IT'S THE NUMBER ONE WAY TO GET 384 00:09:57,460 --> 00:09:58,560 A FREE PEN FROM A WOMAN 385 00:09:58,560 --> 00:10:00,120 BORN IN 1904. 386 00:10:01,319 --> 00:10:02,520 VOTING'S ALSO THE SUBJECT OF 387 00:10:02,520 --> 00:10:04,900 THIS BONKERS EARLY '90s PSA. 388 00:10:04,900 --> 00:10:05,809 >> ART IS NOT PRODUCED 389 00:10:05,809 --> 00:10:08,112 IN A VACUUM. 390 00:10:08,220 --> 00:10:09,760 BEAUTY CANNOT BE REGULATED BY 391 00:10:09,760 --> 00:10:10,760 THE STATE. 392 00:10:11,380 --> 00:10:12,860 MUSIC IS A REFLECTION OF OUR 393 00:10:12,860 --> 00:10:13,819 CULTURE. 394 00:10:13,819 --> 00:10:15,319 TODAY OUR OWN GOVERNMENT IS 395 00:10:15,319 --> 00:10:16,920 TRYING TO TELL YOU WHAT YOU 396 00:10:16,920 --> 00:10:18,440 SHOULD AND SHOULDN'T PUT IN YOUR 397 00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:19,319 TAPE DECK. 398 00:10:19,319 --> 00:10:21,020 BUT THERE IS A WAY OUT OF THE 399 00:10:21,020 --> 00:10:22,020 VACUUM. 400 00:10:22,240 --> 00:10:23,879 GET TO THE POLLS ON NOVEMBER 6TH 401 00:10:23,879 --> 00:10:25,279 AND EXERCISE YOUR RIGHT. 402 00:10:25,360 --> 00:10:27,137 >> IT'S YOUR TURN TO SPEAK. 403 00:10:27,220 --> 00:10:28,759 YOUR VOTE IS YOUR VOICE. 404 00:10:28,893 --> 00:10:32,775 >> John: WHAT! 405 00:10:32,910 --> 00:10:34,649 OKAY, SETTING ASIDE THE FACT 406 00:10:34,649 --> 00:10:35,450 THAT SEEMS TO HAVE BEEN 407 00:10:35,450 --> 00:10:36,950 DIRECTED BY A DEPRESSED DANISH 408 00:10:36,950 --> 00:10:38,870 TEENAGER, THAT'S MAYBE THE MOST 409 00:10:38,870 --> 00:10:40,510 EARLY '90s THING I'VE EVER SEEN. 410 00:10:40,510 --> 00:10:41,370 YOU'RE GOT SJP 411 00:10:41,370 --> 00:10:42,370 AND ROBERT DOWNEY JR. WHO -- 412 00:10:42,370 --> 00:10:43,170 FUN FACT -- WERE A COUPLE 413 00:10:43,170 --> 00:10:44,010 FOR SEVEN YEARS. 414 00:10:44,010 --> 00:10:44,970 AND YOU'VE GOT THE SULLEN 415 00:10:44,970 --> 00:10:46,290 MENTION OF A "TAPE DECK", 416 00:10:46,370 --> 00:10:47,510 WHICH IS BASICALLY LIKE AN 417 00:10:47,510 --> 00:10:49,410 iPOD BUT FROM THE CIVIL WAR. 418 00:10:50,210 --> 00:10:51,590 I'M GENUINELY NOT SURE YOU COULD 419 00:10:51,590 --> 00:10:53,010 GET MORE '90s UNLESS THEY BOTH 420 00:10:53,010 --> 00:10:54,290 THREW ON GRETZKY JERSEYS AND 421 00:10:54,290 --> 00:10:56,170 INVADED IRAQI-OCCUPIED KUWAIT. 422 00:10:57,590 --> 00:10:58,730 SPECIFICALLY, THIS STORY 423 00:10:58,730 --> 00:10:59,730 CONCERNS THE FACT THAT -- WHILE 424 00:10:59,730 --> 00:11:01,043 MIDTERM ELECTIONS ARE STILL FOUR 425 00:11:01,043 --> 00:11:02,479 MONTHS AWAY -- SOME OF THE 426 00:11:02,570 --> 00:11:03,570 BIGGEST DECISIONS THAT MAY 427 00:11:03,570 --> 00:11:04,890 DECIDE THE RESULTS HAVE ACTUALLY 428 00:11:04,890 --> 00:11:06,130 ALREADY TAKEN PLACE. 429 00:11:06,470 --> 00:11:07,730 AND THAT'S THANKS TO A 430 00:11:07,730 --> 00:11:09,330 REDISTRICTING FIGHT THAT'S BEEN 431 00:11:09,330 --> 00:11:10,970 RAGING ALL OVER THE COUNTRY. 432 00:11:11,070 --> 00:11:12,910 >> REPUBLICANS IN TEXAS 433 00:11:12,910 --> 00:11:15,450 CURRENTLY HOLD 25 OF THE STATE'S 434 00:11:15,450 --> 00:11:16,990 38 CONGRESSIONAL SEATS. 435 00:11:17,470 --> 00:11:19,250 THE NEW MAP UPS THE TOTAL THEY 436 00:11:19,250 --> 00:11:20,330 COULD WIN TO 30. 437 00:11:20,330 --> 00:11:21,490 >> CALIFORNIA VOTERS HAVE 438 00:11:21,490 --> 00:11:23,230 APPROVED PROPOSITION 50 439 00:11:23,470 --> 00:11:24,610 REDRAWING CONGRESSIONAL 440 00:11:24,610 --> 00:11:25,930 DISTRICTS IN A WAY THAT COULD 441 00:11:25,930 --> 00:11:28,370 COST REPUBLICANS FIVE SEATS NEXT 442 00:11:28,370 --> 00:11:28,791 YEAR. 443 00:11:28,791 --> 00:11:29,939 >> THE MISSOURI SENATE HAS 444 00:11:30,020 --> 00:11:31,168 PASSED A TRUMP-BACKED 445 00:11:31,250 --> 00:11:33,250 CONGRESSIONAL MAP INTENDED TO 446 00:11:33,250 --> 00:11:34,750 HELP REPUBLICANS ADD AN 447 00:11:34,750 --> 00:11:36,110 ADDITIONAL U.S. HOUSE SEAT. 448 00:11:36,312 --> 00:11:38,108 >> THE LOUISIANA STATE HOUSE HAS 449 00:11:38,108 --> 00:11:38,990 ADVANCED AN UPDATED 450 00:11:38,990 --> 00:11:40,750 CONGRESSIONAL MAP THAT IS 451 00:11:40,750 --> 00:11:42,470 EXPECTED TO REMOVE AT LEAST ONE 452 00:11:42,930 --> 00:11:43,930 DEMOCRAT-LEANING DISTRICT. 453 00:11:44,110 --> 00:11:45,428 >> John: THAT'S RIGHT. 454 00:11:45,428 --> 00:11:46,410 TONIGHT, WE'RE GOING TO BE 455 00:11:46,410 --> 00:11:47,830 TALKING ABOUT CONGRESSIONAL MAPS 456 00:11:48,030 --> 00:11:49,510 REALLY SOLIDIFYING THIS AS THE 457 00:11:49,510 --> 00:11:51,350 ONLY COMEDY SHOW ON TV YOU FEEL 458 00:11:51,350 --> 00:11:52,610 LIKE YOU SHOULD HAVE STUDIED 459 00:11:52,610 --> 00:11:53,270 MORE FOR. 460 00:11:53,270 --> 00:11:55,210 BUT LOOK, THAT IS WHAT YOU GET 461 00:11:55,210 --> 00:11:56,160 WHEN YOU TUNE IN TO 462 00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:57,490 "'YES, UNFORTUNATELY, THIS WILL 463 00:11:57,490 --> 00:11:58,910 BE ON THE TEST' WITH AUSTIN 464 00:11:58,910 --> 00:11:59,910 DOWNERS." 465 00:12:00,410 --> 00:12:02,810 THE POINT IS, FOR THE PAST YEAR 466 00:12:02,910 --> 00:12:04,040 REPUBLICANS AND DEMOCRATS HAVE 467 00:12:04,040 --> 00:12:05,390 BEEN AT WAR OVER CONGRESSIONAL 468 00:12:05,390 --> 00:12:06,430 MAPS, WITH GOVERNORS, STATE 469 00:12:06,430 --> 00:12:07,610 LAWMAKERS, AND ESPECIALLY 470 00:12:07,610 --> 00:12:09,510 THE SUPREME COURT PLAYING KEY 471 00:12:09,510 --> 00:12:09,930 ROLES. 472 00:12:09,930 --> 00:12:11,170 IN FACT, IT'S BEEN PREDICTED 473 00:12:11,170 --> 00:12:12,450 THAT, THANKS TO THIS LATEST 474 00:12:12,450 --> 00:12:13,510 BATCH OF REDISTRICTING 475 00:12:14,370 --> 00:12:15,510 REPUBLICANS COULD GAIN BETWEEN 476 00:12:15,510 --> 00:12:17,630 3 TO 12 MORE SEATS IN CONGRESS 477 00:12:17,630 --> 00:12:18,850 THAN THEY'D OTHERWISE HAVE DONE 478 00:12:18,890 --> 00:12:20,030 WHICH IS SIGNIFICANT, AS -- 479 00:12:20,130 --> 00:12:21,310 REMEMBER -- THE LAST ELECTION 480 00:12:21,310 --> 00:12:23,010 GAVE THEM JUST A FIVE-SEAT 481 00:12:23,578 --> 00:12:25,519 MAJORITY. 482 00:12:25,519 --> 00:12:26,489 AND GIVEN SO MANY OF THESE 483 00:12:26,489 --> 00:12:27,310 FIGHTS CENTER ON BREAKING UP 484 00:12:27,310 --> 00:12:29,210 MAJORITY-BLACK DISTRICTS, PEOPLE 485 00:12:29,210 --> 00:12:30,790 IN THEM ARE UNDERSTANDABLY 486 00:12:30,790 --> 00:12:31,500 FURIOUS. 487 00:12:31,500 --> 00:12:32,994 >> CHAOS AT THE TENNESSEE 488 00:12:32,994 --> 00:12:33,777 CAPITOL IN NASHVILLE THURSDAY AS 489 00:12:33,777 --> 00:12:34,737 DEMOCRATIC LAWMAKERS AND 490 00:12:34,737 --> 00:12:37,298 PROTESTERS TRIED TO STOP 491 00:12:37,770 --> 00:12:39,370 LEGISLATION BREAKING UP THE 492 00:12:39,370 --> 00:12:41,170 STATE'S ONLY DEMOCRATIC HOUSE 493 00:12:41,170 --> 00:12:42,170 SEAT. 494 00:12:43,570 --> 00:12:45,630 YELLING, HOLDING SIGNS, CALLING 495 00:12:45,630 --> 00:12:48,090 THE MOVE "JIM CROW 2.0," EVEN 496 00:12:51,450 --> 00:12:52,710 BURNING A PRINTOUT OF THE 497 00:12:52,710 --> 00:12:53,660 CONFEDERATE FLAG. 498 00:12:53,660 --> 00:12:54,337 >> John: YEAH, BURNING A 499 00:12:54,337 --> 00:12:55,076 PRINTOUT OF A CONFEDERATE FLAG 500 00:12:55,076 --> 00:12:55,359 IS A PRETTY POWERFUL RESPONSE 501 00:12:55,359 --> 00:12:56,020 THERE. 502 00:12:56,020 --> 00:12:56,492 IT EFFECTIVELY COMMUNICATES 503 00:12:56,492 --> 00:12:57,090 TWO THINGS: 504 00:12:57,090 --> 00:12:58,570 ONE, WE WON'T STAND FOR RIGHTS 505 00:12:58,570 --> 00:12:59,630 BEING STRIPPED AWAY, AND TWO, 506 00:12:59,790 --> 00:13:01,190 I'M MAD ENOUGH TO PUT UP WITH 507 00:13:01,190 --> 00:13:02,630 SOME PRETTY WEIRD LOOKS FROM A 508 00:13:02,630 --> 00:13:04,390 STAPLES EMPLOYEE WHEN WE PRINTED 509 00:13:04,390 --> 00:13:05,390 THIS OUT. 510 00:13:06,030 --> 00:13:07,410 AND IF YOU'VE BEEN SEEING SCENES 511 00:13:07,410 --> 00:13:08,470 LIKE THAT AND WONDERING HOW WE 512 00:13:08,470 --> 00:13:10,210 GOT TO THIS POINT, TONIGHT, WE 513 00:13:10,210 --> 00:13:11,150 THOUGHT WE'D TRY AND EXPLAIN 514 00:13:11,150 --> 00:13:12,140 THE CURRENT REDISTRICTING 515 00:13:12,140 --> 00:13:12,814 BATTLES. 516 00:13:12,814 --> 00:13:14,070 SPECIFICALLY, HOW DAMAGING THEY 517 00:13:14,070 --> 00:13:15,630 COULD BE, AND WHAT COULD BE DONE 518 00:13:15,630 --> 00:13:16,300 GOING FORWARD. 519 00:13:16,300 --> 00:13:16,990 AND LET'S START WITH THE FACT 520 00:13:16,990 --> 00:13:18,650 THAT REDISTRICTING, IN AND OF 521 00:13:18,650 --> 00:13:20,710 ITSELF, IS NOT A BAD THING. 522 00:13:21,010 --> 00:13:22,290 POPULATIONS AREN'T STATIC, AND 523 00:13:22,290 --> 00:13:23,670 DISTRICT LINES SHOULD ACCOUNT 524 00:13:23,670 --> 00:13:24,130 FOR THAT. 525 00:13:24,130 --> 00:13:25,910 BUT THE THING IS, EXACTLY HOW 526 00:13:25,910 --> 00:13:27,890 AND WHERE YOU DRAW THEM MATTERS 527 00:13:27,890 --> 00:13:29,490 A LOT BECAUSE, AS WE'VE 528 00:13:29,979 --> 00:13:30,463 DISCUSSED BEFORE, YOU CAN PUT A 529 00:13:30,463 --> 00:13:30,873 HEAVY THUMB ON THE SCALE OF WHO 530 00:13:30,873 --> 00:13:33,511 GETS ELECTED. 531 00:13:33,588 --> 00:13:35,385 >> IMAGINE A HYPOTHETICAL STATE 532 00:13:35,462 --> 00:13:38,674 WITH A POPULATION OF 25 PEOPLE. 533 00:13:38,750 --> 00:13:40,690 10 BELONG TO ONE PARTY, 15 534 00:13:40,690 --> 00:13:41,690 BELONG TO THE OTHER. 535 00:13:41,950 --> 00:13:43,050 NOW LET'S SAY THEY GET TO SEND 536 00:13:43,050 --> 00:13:44,690 FIVE REPRESENTATIVES TO CONGRESS 537 00:13:45,290 --> 00:13:47,130 DRAW THE LINES HORIZONTALLY, YOU 538 00:13:47,130 --> 00:13:48,550 GET PROPORTIONAL REPRESENTATION. 539 00:13:49,130 --> 00:13:50,890 TWO REPS FROM THE GRAY PARTY AND 540 00:13:50,890 --> 00:13:52,930 THREE FROM THE WHITE, BUT DRAW 541 00:13:52,930 --> 00:13:54,170 THE DISTRICT LINES VERTICALLY 542 00:13:54,170 --> 00:13:55,850 AND THE GRAY PARTY WOULD GET 543 00:13:55,850 --> 00:13:57,670 NONE BECAUSE THE WHITE PARTY 544 00:13:57,670 --> 00:13:58,670 WOULD HAVE A MAJORITY 545 00:13:58,670 --> 00:13:59,910 IN EVERY DISTRICT. 546 00:13:59,971 --> 00:14:00,971 >> John: EXACTLY. 547 00:14:01,410 --> 00:14:02,850 DEPENDING ON HOW YOU DRAW THE 548 00:14:02,850 --> 00:14:04,110 LINES, YOU CAN GIVE YOURSELF 549 00:14:04,110 --> 00:14:05,150 A MAJOR ADVANTAGE. 550 00:14:05,190 --> 00:14:06,310 AND WHILE I DO APPRECIATE THE 551 00:14:06,310 --> 00:14:07,810 DIAGRAM THERE, THERE'S NO NEED 552 00:14:07,810 --> 00:14:09,350 TO "IMAGINE A HYPOTHETICAL STATE 553 00:14:09,350 --> 00:14:11,030 WITH 25 PEOPLE", THAT'S JUST 554 00:14:11,030 --> 00:14:11,570 WYOMING. 555 00:14:11,570 --> 00:14:13,950 YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT WYOMING. 556 00:14:14,930 --> 00:14:16,490 THAT PRACTICE OF MANIPULATING 557 00:14:16,490 --> 00:14:18,370 MAPS TO GET THE OUTCOME YOU WANT 558 00:14:18,370 --> 00:14:19,370 IS KNOWN AS GERRYMANDERING 559 00:14:19,430 --> 00:14:20,570 AND IT'S BEEN A PROBLEM IN THE 560 00:14:20,570 --> 00:14:22,030 U.S. FOR CENTURIES. 561 00:14:22,290 --> 00:14:23,770 AND YOU SHOULD KNOW: MOST OF THE 562 00:14:23,770 --> 00:14:25,170 WORLD DOESN'T LET ITS 563 00:14:25,170 --> 00:14:26,770 POLITICIANS DO THAT AND FOR 564 00:14:26,770 --> 00:14:28,350 VERY GOOD REASON, AS THIS 565 00:14:28,350 --> 00:14:29,350 PROFESSOR EXPLAINS. 566 00:14:29,510 --> 00:14:32,050 >> EVERY FALL, I SPEAK TO FIVE 567 00:14:32,050 --> 00:14:33,330 OR SIX MEMBERS OF THE BRITISH 568 00:14:33,330 --> 00:14:34,970 PARLIAMENT THAT COME OVER TO 569 00:14:35,370 --> 00:14:36,690 SHADOW MEMBERS OF CONGRESS, AND 570 00:14:36,690 --> 00:14:37,310 ONE OF THE THINGS I HAVE TO 571 00:14:37,310 --> 00:14:38,610 EXPLAIN TO THEM IS "HERE'S HOW 572 00:14:38,610 --> 00:14:39,610 YOU GET ELECTED TO THE HOUSE." 573 00:14:40,029 --> 00:14:43,230 I SEE THESE SHOCKED LOOKS ON 574 00:14:43,490 --> 00:14:44,970 THESE BRITISH FACES AND ONE TIME 575 00:14:45,030 --> 00:14:46,330 ONE STOOD UP AND SAID "WELL, 576 00:14:46,430 --> 00:14:47,430 THAT'S TERRIBLE! 577 00:14:47,490 --> 00:14:48,890 THAT'S NOT THE VOTERS CHOOSING 578 00:14:48,890 --> 00:14:50,370 THEIR REPRESENTATIVES, THAT'S 579 00:14:50,370 --> 00:14:51,610 THE REPRESENTATIVES CHOOSING 580 00:14:51,610 --> 00:14:52,322 THEIR VOTERS! 581 00:14:52,322 --> 00:14:55,736 >> John: HEY, HEY! 582 00:14:55,830 --> 00:14:56,830 STOP IT. 583 00:14:57,930 --> 00:14:59,590 IT'S OKAY FOR ME TO DO 584 00:14:59,590 --> 00:15:00,090 THAT VOICE. 585 00:15:00,090 --> 00:15:01,950 IT'S NOT OKAY FOR YOU TO DO IT. 586 00:15:03,050 --> 00:15:04,950 ALSO, AS AN AMERICAN, I DO THINK 587 00:15:04,950 --> 00:15:05,870 YOU'D HAVE BEEN WITHIN YOUR 588 00:15:05,870 --> 00:15:06,970 RIGHTS TO SAY TO THOSE BRITISH 589 00:15:06,970 --> 00:15:07,970 POLITICIANS, "YOU KNOW WHAT? 590 00:15:08,070 --> 00:15:09,680 I DON'T WANT TO HEAR SHIT ABOUT 591 00:15:09,680 --> 00:15:11,250 HOW MAPS SHOULD BE DRAWN FROM 592 00:15:11,250 --> 00:15:12,700 ANYONE FROM GREAT BRITAIN.'" 593 00:15:12,700 --> 00:15:13,910 WHICH, BY THE WAY, I'M PRETTY 594 00:15:13,910 --> 00:15:15,630 SURE IS A DIRECT GHANDI QUOTE. 595 00:15:16,730 --> 00:15:19,070 THE POINT IS, IN MANY STATES 596 00:15:19,130 --> 00:15:20,390 THE WAY WE DRAW DISTRICTS IS 597 00:15:20,390 --> 00:15:21,110 DEEPLY FLAWED. 598 00:15:21,110 --> 00:15:22,410 AND EVEN BEFORE THE PAST YEAR, 599 00:15:22,410 --> 00:15:23,570 THE SUPREME COURT HAD MANAGED TO 600 00:15:23,570 --> 00:15:24,430 MAKE IT EVEN WORSE. 601 00:15:24,430 --> 00:15:25,930 FOR INSTANCE, IT USED TO BE THAT 602 00:15:25,930 --> 00:15:27,490 REDISTRICTING WAS ONLY DONE ONCE 603 00:15:27,490 --> 00:15:28,830 A DECADE, AFTER THE CENSUS, BUT 604 00:15:28,830 --> 00:15:30,830 IN 2006, THE COURT RULED STATES 605 00:15:31,222 --> 00:15:31,701 CAN DO IT AS MANY TIMES AS 606 00:15:31,701 --> 00:15:32,717 THEY WANT. 607 00:15:32,750 --> 00:15:34,250 THEN IN 2013, THEY EFFECTIVELY 608 00:15:34,250 --> 00:15:35,290 TOSSED OUT A REQUIREMENT THAT 609 00:15:35,290 --> 00:15:36,410 AREAS WITH A HISTORY OF 610 00:15:36,410 --> 00:15:37,410 DISCRIMINATION GET 611 00:15:37,550 --> 00:15:39,090 "PRECLEARANCE" BEFORE REDRAWING 612 00:15:39,090 --> 00:15:39,290 MAPS. 613 00:15:39,290 --> 00:15:40,990 AND IN 2019, THEY RULED THAT 614 00:15:40,990 --> 00:15:42,230 FEDERAL COURTS COULDN'T STOP 615 00:15:42,230 --> 00:15:43,090 STATES FROM DRAWING LINES 616 00:15:43,090 --> 00:15:44,370 ON A PARTISAN BASIS. 617 00:15:44,470 --> 00:15:46,910 SO IF, IN THE HELPFUL FRAMING OF 618 00:15:46,910 --> 00:15:48,310 THAT CLIP FROM EARLIER, THE 619 00:15:48,350 --> 00:15:50,090 WHITE PARTY WANTED TO DRAW LINES 620 00:15:50,090 --> 00:15:50,490 IN A WAY THAT'D 621 00:15:50,490 --> 00:15:51,331 TAKES LEAD SOMEWHERE FROM THE 622 00:15:51,331 --> 00:15:52,825 NON WHITE PARTY AND THERE WAS NO 623 00:15:52,866 --> 00:15:55,628 STATE LAW PREVENTING IT 624 00:15:55,670 --> 00:15:56,910 THE ONLY THING STOPPING THEM 625 00:15:56,910 --> 00:15:58,520 WOULD BE THEIR OWN SENSE OF 626 00:15:58,520 --> 00:15:58,890 SHAME. 627 00:15:58,890 --> 00:16:01,170 ALL OF WHICH LEADS US TO LAST 628 00:16:01,170 --> 00:16:02,750 SUMMER, WHEN ONE OF THE MOST 629 00:16:02,750 --> 00:16:04,060 SHAMELESS PRESIDENTS IN U.S. 630 00:16:04,060 --> 00:16:05,910 HISTORY MADE A PRETTY BOLD 631 00:16:05,910 --> 00:16:07,950 REQUEST OF TEXAS TO REDRAW THEIR 632 00:16:07,950 --> 00:16:08,230 MAPS. 633 00:16:08,230 --> 00:16:10,190 AND HE WAS NOT SHY ABOUT WHY HE 634 00:16:10,190 --> 00:16:10,729 WAS ASKING. 635 00:16:10,729 --> 00:16:13,130 >> ON TEXAS, HOW MANY MORE SEATS 636 00:16:13,130 --> 00:16:15,018 DO YOU WANT THE REPUBLICANS TO 637 00:16:15,018 --> 00:16:16,696 DRAW? 638 00:16:16,696 --> 00:16:17,290 >> I THINK WE GET FIVE. 639 00:16:17,290 --> 00:16:18,550 AND THERE COULD BE SOME OTHER 640 00:16:18,550 --> 00:16:18,910 STATES. 641 00:16:18,910 --> 00:16:20,410 WE'RE GONNA GET ANOTHER THREE OR 642 00:16:20,410 --> 00:16:21,930 FOUR OR FIVE IN ADDITION. 643 00:16:22,450 --> 00:16:24,110 TEXAS WOULD BE THE BIGGEST ONE. 644 00:16:24,110 --> 00:16:25,110 AND THAT'LL BE FIVE. 645 00:16:25,110 --> 00:16:25,940 >> ARE YOU CALLING THEN FOR A 646 00:16:25,940 --> 00:16:26,663 COMPLETE REDRAWING OF THE 647 00:16:26,663 --> 00:16:27,967 CONGRESSIONAL MAP? 648 00:16:27,967 --> 00:16:28,770 >> NO, NO. 649 00:16:28,770 --> 00:16:30,310 JUST A VERY SIMPLE REDRAWING. 650 00:16:30,390 --> 00:16:31,450 WE PICK UP FIVE SEATS. 651 00:16:31,535 --> 00:16:32,785 >> John: YEAH. 652 00:16:32,872 --> 00:16:34,682 THAT'S PRETTY DIRECT. 653 00:16:34,769 --> 00:16:36,449 HE ORDERED FIVE MORE REPUBLICAN 654 00:16:36,449 --> 00:16:37,450 SEATS FROM GOVERNOR GREG ABBOTT. 655 00:16:37,490 --> 00:16:38,610 AND AS A RESULT, IN AUGUST 656 00:16:38,730 --> 00:16:39,730 ABBOTT SIGNED A NEW 657 00:16:39,730 --> 00:16:40,730 CONGRESSIONAL MAP INTO LAW 658 00:16:40,769 --> 00:16:42,150 DESIGNED TO DO EXACTLY THAT. 659 00:16:42,150 --> 00:16:43,030 SO, BASICALLY 660 00:16:43,030 --> 00:16:44,230 TRUMP DEMANDED MORE SEATS, 661 00:16:44,329 --> 00:16:45,310 AND HE GOT THEM. 662 00:16:45,310 --> 00:16:46,510 WHICH I KNOW SOUNDS LIKE THE 663 00:16:46,510 --> 00:16:47,290 ANSWER TO THE QUESTION 664 00:16:47,290 --> 00:16:48,510 "WHY IS JEFFREY EPSTEIN'S PLANE 665 00:16:48,510 --> 00:16:49,090 SO FULL?" 666 00:16:49,090 --> 00:16:50,870 BUT IT'S ALSO TRUE HERE. 667 00:16:51,390 --> 00:16:52,890 AND IN THE WAKE OF TEXAS'S 668 00:16:52,930 --> 00:16:53,930 REDISTRICTING, DEMOCRATIC 669 00:16:54,090 --> 00:16:55,790 LEADERS FOR ONCE ACTUALLY 670 00:16:55,790 --> 00:16:56,890 HIT BACK HARD. 671 00:16:57,089 --> 00:16:58,089 IN FACT, CALIFORNIA GOVERNOR 672 00:16:58,210 --> 00:16:59,550 GAVIN NEWSOM ANNOUNCED A BALLOT 673 00:16:59,550 --> 00:17:01,030 MEASURE TO IMPLEMENT NEW MAPS 674 00:17:01,030 --> 00:17:02,710 THAT'D GIVE DEMOCRATS UP TO 675 00:17:02,710 --> 00:17:03,850 FIVE MORE SEATS, ESSENTIALLY 676 00:17:04,250 --> 00:17:05,868 OFFSETTING WHAT TEXAS HAD DONE. 677 00:17:06,130 --> 00:17:07,529 HERE HE IS MAKING HIS PITCH. 678 00:17:07,701 --> 00:17:09,412 >> IT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH TO JUST 679 00:17:09,412 --> 00:17:10,412 HOLD HANDS, HAVE A CANDLE LIGHT 680 00:17:10,609 --> 00:17:12,089 VIGIL, AND TALK ABOUT THE WAY 681 00:17:12,089 --> 00:17:13,089 THE WORLD SHOULD BE. 682 00:17:14,130 --> 00:17:16,270 WE HAVE GOT TO RECOGNIZE THE 683 00:17:16,270 --> 00:17:17,690 CARDS THAT HAVE BEEN DEALT. 684 00:17:18,290 --> 00:17:19,950 AND WE HAVE GOT TO MEET FIRE 685 00:17:19,950 --> 00:17:20,847 WITH FIRE. 686 00:17:20,847 --> 00:17:22,201 >> John: HE'S RIGHT, AND NOW 687 00:17:22,298 --> 00:17:23,750 UNFORTUNATELY, I FIND MYSELF IN 688 00:17:23,750 --> 00:17:24,750 THE UNPLEASANT POSITION OF 689 00:17:24,810 --> 00:17:25,930 HAVING TO ADMIT THAT GAVIN 690 00:17:25,930 --> 00:17:27,310 NEWSOM IS RIGHT ABOUT SOMETHING. 691 00:17:27,430 --> 00:17:29,090 BECAUSE TO BE CLEAR, I'M NOT A 692 00:17:29,090 --> 00:17:30,270 HUGE FAN OF THAT MAN, FOR MANY 693 00:17:30,270 --> 00:17:31,130 REASONS, FROM HIS GENERAL 694 00:17:31,130 --> 00:17:32,930 "ANDREW CUOMO BUT CALIFORNIA" 695 00:17:32,930 --> 00:17:35,270 VIBES TO THE FACT HE 696 00:17:35,270 --> 00:17:36,510 VETOED A BILL TO LIMIT SOLITARY 697 00:17:36,690 --> 00:17:37,630 CONFINEMENT, TO HIS RESPONDING 698 00:17:37,630 --> 00:17:38,954 TO BOOK BANS BY POSTING 699 00:17:38,954 --> 00:17:42,011 THIS PHOTO OF HIMSELF READING 700 00:17:42,011 --> 00:17:43,011 PAGE 0.5 OF "BELOVED," WITH THE 701 00:17:44,050 --> 00:17:45,430 CAPTION "READING SOME BANNED 702 00:17:45,430 --> 00:17:46,849 BOOKS TO FIGURE OUT WHAT THESE 703 00:17:46,849 --> 00:17:48,210 STATES ARE SO AFRAID OF." 704 00:17:48,430 --> 00:17:49,430 FEATURING THE MOST 705 00:17:49,550 --> 00:17:50,829 ORCHESTRATED-BY-A-PUBLICIST 706 00:17:50,829 --> 00:17:53,430 STACK OF BOOKS I HAVE EVER SEEN. 707 00:17:53,430 --> 00:17:54,215 FROM 708 00:17:54,215 --> 00:17:55,675 "MAKE SURE '1984' IS PEEKING OUT 709 00:17:55,675 --> 00:17:56,510 FROM UNDER 'TO KILL A 710 00:17:56,510 --> 00:17:57,810 MOCKINGBIRD,' BUT NOT TOO MUCH. 711 00:17:57,910 --> 00:17:59,170 THAT WOULDN'T SEEM ORGANIC. 712 00:17:59,250 --> 00:18:00,250 OH, AND THIS IS IMPORTANT. 713 00:18:00,250 --> 00:18:01,069 PLEASE MAKE SURE 714 00:18:01,069 --> 00:18:02,490 GENDER QUEER IS BARELY 715 00:18:02,490 --> 00:18:03,490 VISIBLE." 716 00:18:03,850 --> 00:18:06,010 AND LOOK, WHILE I DON'T LOVE 717 00:18:06,010 --> 00:18:07,170 THE LOGIC OF, "TEXAS 718 00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:08,270 DISENFRANCHISED A BUNCH OF 719 00:18:08,270 --> 00:18:09,297 DEMOCRATIC VOTERS, SO IN 720 00:18:09,297 --> 00:18:09,760 RESPONSE, WE'RE GOING TO 721 00:18:09,760 --> 00:18:10,896 DISENFRANCHISE A BUNCH OF 722 00:18:11,390 --> 00:18:12,810 CALIFORNIA REPUBLICANS," I DO 723 00:18:12,810 --> 00:18:14,970 ALSO GET THAT THE ONLY REAL 724 00:18:14,970 --> 00:18:16,690 ALTERNATIVE WAS TO "WHINE ABOUT 725 00:18:16,690 --> 00:18:18,210 FAIRNESS AND THEN LOSE." 726 00:18:18,490 --> 00:18:19,490 AND APPARENTLY, A LOT OF 727 00:18:19,570 --> 00:18:20,730 CALIFORNIANS AGREED, BECAUSE 728 00:18:20,730 --> 00:18:21,730 NEWSOM'S PROPOSITION 729 00:18:22,070 --> 00:18:23,070 PASSED EASILY. 730 00:18:23,190 --> 00:18:25,150 BUT THE THING IS, BY THE TIME 731 00:18:25,150 --> 00:18:27,130 THAT HAPPENED, MORE RED STATES 732 00:18:27,130 --> 00:18:28,550 HAD ENTERED THE FRAY. 733 00:18:28,710 --> 00:18:29,770 MISSOURI PASSED NEW 734 00:18:29,770 --> 00:18:30,470 CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICT 735 00:18:30,470 --> 00:18:31,410 BOUNDARIES IN SEPTEMBER -- 736 00:18:31,410 --> 00:18:32,530 LIKELY GIVING REPUBLICANS ONE 737 00:18:32,530 --> 00:18:33,870 MORE SEAT -- AND NORTH CAROLINA 738 00:18:33,870 --> 00:18:34,970 DID THE SAME IN OCTOBER. 739 00:18:34,970 --> 00:18:36,710 SO IN RESPONSE, DEMOCRATS IN 740 00:18:36,710 --> 00:18:38,350 VIRGINIA PUT A REFERENDUM TO 741 00:18:38,350 --> 00:18:39,750 VOTERS THERE THAT'D ALLOW THEM 742 00:18:39,750 --> 00:18:41,170 TO DO A PARTICULARLY AGGRESSIVE 743 00:18:41,170 --> 00:18:42,510 GERRYMANDER THAT'D POTENTIALLY 744 00:18:42,510 --> 00:18:43,750 GIVE THEM TEN SEATS, 745 00:18:43,750 --> 00:18:44,970 TO REPUBLICANS' ONE. 746 00:18:45,095 --> 00:18:46,110 >> TO MAKE THE MAP MORE BLUE 747 00:18:46,237 --> 00:18:47,822 DEMOCRATS WOULD CARVE UP DEEP 748 00:18:47,950 --> 00:18:49,470 BLUE FAIRFAX COUNTY. 749 00:18:49,790 --> 00:18:50,870 WHERE I'M STANDING WOULD BE THE 750 00:18:50,870 --> 00:18:51,810 INTERSECTION OF THREE 751 00:18:51,810 --> 00:18:53,310 CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICTS, SO THAT 752 00:18:53,310 --> 00:18:54,390 THE APARTMENT BUILDINGS OVER 753 00:18:54,390 --> 00:18:55,350 HERE WOULD BE IN ONE 754 00:18:55,350 --> 00:18:56,350 CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICT. 755 00:18:56,550 --> 00:18:57,710 THOSE OVER THERE WOULD BE IN A 756 00:18:57,710 --> 00:18:59,630 SECOND, AND THEN RIGHT OVER HERE 757 00:18:59,730 --> 00:19:00,950 THESE FOLKS WOULD BE IN A THIRD 758 00:19:00,950 --> 00:19:01,950 CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICT. 759 00:19:02,230 --> 00:19:03,750 IF YOU DROVE JUST A SHORT 760 00:19:03,750 --> 00:19:05,050 DISTANCE AWAY, YOU WOULD FIND A 761 00:19:05,050 --> 00:19:06,190 FOURTH CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICT 762 00:19:06,309 --> 00:19:07,409 AND THEN A FIFTH. 763 00:19:08,030 --> 00:19:09,690 THAT'S LED TO A NEW REPUBLICAN 764 00:19:09,690 --> 00:19:11,810 CATCHPHRASE, "DON'T FAIRFAX ME," 765 00:19:12,050 --> 00:19:13,050 POPPING UP. 766 00:19:13,150 --> 00:19:15,230 COUNTERING THAT, "TEXAS STARTED 767 00:19:15,230 --> 00:19:16,230 IT" BUMPER STICKERS. 768 00:19:16,267 --> 00:19:18,830 >> John: NOW, 769 00:19:18,950 --> 00:19:22,090 THAT IS OBVIOUSLY VERY PETTY. 770 00:19:22,150 --> 00:19:23,170 BUT ALSO AS A SLOGAN, 771 00:19:23,570 --> 00:19:25,490 "DON'T FAIRFAX ME" IS JUST 772 00:19:25,490 --> 00:19:26,490 NONSENSE. 773 00:19:26,510 --> 00:19:27,830 IS IT THE WORST ONE I'VE EVER 774 00:19:27,830 --> 00:19:28,110 HEARD? 775 00:19:28,110 --> 00:19:28,770 NO, BECAUSE THAT'D BE 776 00:19:28,770 --> 00:19:29,770 DOMINO'S NEW SLOGAN 777 00:19:29,990 --> 00:19:30,990 YOU CAN'T SAY "'DOMINO'S" 778 00:19:31,270 --> 00:19:32,390 WITHOUT SAYING "MMM." 779 00:19:33,509 --> 00:19:34,820 ALTHOUGH I'LL POINT OUT: 780 00:19:34,820 --> 00:19:36,110 YOU ALSO CAN'T SAY DOMINO'S 781 00:19:36,110 --> 00:19:37,790 WITHOUT SAYING "NO", WHICH FEELS 782 00:19:37,790 --> 00:19:39,570 MUCH MORE RELEVANT TO ME. 783 00:19:40,590 --> 00:19:42,170 NOW, THE GOOD NEWS FOR DEMOCRATS 784 00:19:42,170 --> 00:19:43,490 IS VIRGINIA'S REFERENDUM PASSED 785 00:19:43,490 --> 00:19:43,970 IN APRIL. 786 00:19:43,970 --> 00:19:45,149 AND AT THAT POINT, THEY'D 787 00:19:45,149 --> 00:19:46,630 BASICALLY FOUGHT REPUBLICANS TO 788 00:19:46,630 --> 00:19:47,670 A DRAW WITH HAKEEM JEFFRIES 789 00:19:48,010 --> 00:19:49,770 EVEN PROMISING "MAXIMUM WARFARE" 790 00:19:49,770 --> 00:19:51,350 IF REPUBLICANS CONTINUED TO 791 00:19:51,350 --> 00:19:52,190 REDISTRICT. 792 00:19:52,190 --> 00:19:54,070 BUT UNFORTUNATELY, SOON AFTER 793 00:19:54,450 --> 00:19:55,490 EVERYTHING FELL APART. 794 00:19:55,590 --> 00:19:56,690 BECAUSE NOT ONLY DID 795 00:19:56,690 --> 00:19:57,770 VIRGINIA'S STATE SUPREME COURT 796 00:19:57,770 --> 00:19:59,110 WIND UP INVALIDATING THAT 797 00:19:59,110 --> 00:20:00,330 REFERENDUM ON TECHNICALITIES 798 00:20:00,510 --> 00:20:02,570 JUST A WEEK EARLIER, THE SUPREME 799 00:20:02,570 --> 00:20:04,270 COURT HANDED REPUBLICANS THIS 800 00:20:04,490 --> 00:20:05,490 MASSIVE GIFT. 801 00:20:05,636 --> 00:20:07,530 >> THE SUPREME COURT ESCALATING 802 00:20:07,619 --> 00:20:09,821 AN INTENSE BACK AND FORTH BATTLE 803 00:20:09,910 --> 00:20:11,770 FOR CONTROL OF CONGRESS, WITH A 804 00:20:11,770 --> 00:20:13,550 LANDMARK RULING THAT'S ALREADY 805 00:20:13,550 --> 00:20:14,870 AFFECTING SOME ELECTIONS. 806 00:20:14,970 --> 00:20:15,970 THE COURT'S CONSERVATIVE 807 00:20:16,130 --> 00:20:18,450 MAJORITY RULING 6-3 THAT 808 00:20:18,850 --> 00:20:19,790 LOUISIANA'S CURRENT 809 00:20:19,790 --> 00:20:21,290 CONGRESSIONAL MAP, WITH TWO 810 00:20:21,290 --> 00:20:22,610 MAJORITY AFRICAN-AMERICAN 811 00:20:22,610 --> 00:20:24,650 DISTRICTS IS UNCONSTITUTIONAL. 812 00:20:24,910 --> 00:20:26,630 DEMOCRATS BLASTING THE RULING 813 00:20:26,870 --> 00:20:28,290 ARGUING IT WEAKENS A KEY 814 00:20:28,290 --> 00:20:29,830 PROVISION OF THE VOTING RIGHTS 815 00:20:30,170 --> 00:20:31,470 ACT, AIMED AT PROHIBITING 816 00:20:31,470 --> 00:20:33,170 DISCRIMINATION THE BASIS OF 817 00:20:33,170 --> 00:20:33,890 RACE. 818 00:20:33,890 --> 00:20:36,070 ADDING THAT OTHER MAJORITY BLACK 819 00:20:36,070 --> 00:20:37,950 DISTRICTS ARE NOW VULNERABLE TO 820 00:20:37,950 --> 00:20:38,834 BEING ERASED. 821 00:20:38,834 --> 00:20:40,298 >> John: YEP, FROM THE SIX 822 00:20:40,298 --> 00:20:41,298 JUSTICES WHO BROUGHT YOU 823 00:20:41,330 --> 00:20:42,730 SUCH BANGER DECISIONS AS "THE 824 00:20:42,730 --> 00:20:44,150 PRESIDENT IS UNTOUCHABLE", "YOUR 825 00:20:44,150 --> 00:20:45,390 UTERUS IS OUR LEGAL PROPERTY" 826 00:20:45,390 --> 00:20:46,730 AND "OOPS! ALL SMOG" 827 00:20:46,870 --> 00:20:48,829 CAME A BRAND NEW DECISION 828 00:20:48,829 --> 00:20:49,829 ON VOTING RIGHTS. 829 00:20:49,870 --> 00:20:51,590 VERY BASICALLY, UNDER THE VOTING 830 00:20:51,590 --> 00:20:52,770 RIGHTS ACT, MINORITY VOTERS 831 00:20:52,770 --> 00:20:54,410 COULD PREVIOUSLY CHALLENGE A MAP 832 00:20:54,410 --> 00:20:55,470 IF IT DILUTED MINORITY 833 00:20:55,470 --> 00:20:56,830 REPRESENTATION IN THEIR STATE 834 00:20:57,050 --> 00:20:58,730 REGARDLESS OF WHETHER THAT WAS 835 00:20:58,730 --> 00:20:59,450 THE INTENTION. 836 00:20:59,450 --> 00:21:00,990 IT WAS TO COMPLY WITH THAT LAW 837 00:21:00,990 --> 00:21:02,710 THAT LOUISIANA DREW A MAP THAT 838 00:21:02,710 --> 00:21:04,430 CONTAINED TWO MAJORITY-BLACK 839 00:21:04,430 --> 00:21:05,430 CONGRESSIONAL DISTRICTS. 840 00:21:05,490 --> 00:21:07,570 BUT IN THAT SUPREME COURT CASE 841 00:21:07,810 --> 00:21:09,210 A GROUP OF 12 SELF-DESCRIBED 842 00:21:09,469 --> 00:21:10,970 "NON-AFRICAN AMERICAN" VOTERS 843 00:21:10,970 --> 00:21:12,450 CLAIMED THAT THEIR "PERSONAL 844 00:21:12,450 --> 00:21:13,910 DIGNITY" HAD BEEN INJURED BY THE 845 00:21:13,910 --> 00:21:14,910 MAP, WHICH THEY SAID 846 00:21:15,210 --> 00:21:16,210 RACIALLY STIGMATIZED 847 00:21:16,270 --> 00:21:17,800 STEREOTYPED, AND MALIGNED THEM. 848 00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:19,030 AND WHILE I DO APPRECIATE THEM 849 00:21:19,030 --> 00:21:20,110 SPECIFYING THEY WERE 850 00:21:20,240 --> 00:21:22,170 "NON-AFRICAN AMERICAN", HONEY 851 00:21:22,290 --> 00:21:23,450 THAT WAS ALREADY CLEAR. 852 00:21:24,670 --> 00:21:26,810 "THIS MAP HURT MY FEELINGS AND I 853 00:21:26,810 --> 00:21:27,970 WANT TO TALK TO YOUR MANAGER" 854 00:21:28,310 --> 00:21:29,650 MORE THAN COVERED IT. 855 00:21:30,990 --> 00:21:33,170 YET THE COURT SIDED WITH THEM 856 00:21:33,230 --> 00:21:34,480 WITH ALITO WRITING THAT GOING 857 00:21:34,480 --> 00:21:35,590 FORWARD, ANYONE CHALLENGING A 858 00:21:35,590 --> 00:21:36,810 MAP COULD ONLY PREVAIL IF THEY 859 00:21:36,810 --> 00:21:38,110 HAD STRONG EVIDENCE 860 00:21:38,110 --> 00:21:40,190 THE STATE INTENTIONALLY DREW 861 00:21:40,190 --> 00:21:41,790 ITS DISTRICTS TO AFFORD MINORITY 862 00:21:41,790 --> 00:21:43,110 VOTERS LESS OPPORTUNITY BECAUSE 863 00:21:43,110 --> 00:21:44,010 OF THEIR RACE. 864 00:21:44,010 --> 00:21:45,590 BASICALLY, UNLESS STATE 865 00:21:45,590 --> 00:21:47,350 LAWMAKERS WERE SHOUTING OUT 866 00:21:47,350 --> 00:21:49,090 SLURS WHILE DRAWING THE LINES 867 00:21:49,390 --> 00:21:50,750 THEY WERE IN THE CLEAR. 868 00:21:51,190 --> 00:21:52,630 AND BY ISSUING THAT RULING, THE 869 00:21:52,630 --> 00:21:53,930 COURT IMMEDIATELY SET OFF A NEW 870 00:21:53,930 --> 00:21:55,150 LIGHTNING ROUND OF 871 00:21:55,150 --> 00:21:55,690 GERRYMANDERING. 872 00:21:55,690 --> 00:21:57,010 BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH LOUISIANA 873 00:21:57,010 --> 00:21:58,210 HAD ALREADY RECEIVED 874 00:21:58,210 --> 00:21:59,890 MORE THAN 40,000 ABSENTEE 875 00:21:59,890 --> 00:22:01,090 BALLOTS FOR ITS CONGRESSIONAL 876 00:22:01,570 --> 00:22:02,250 PRIMARIES, THEIR GOVERNOR 877 00:22:02,250 --> 00:22:02,930 QUICKLY DECLARED 878 00:22:02,930 --> 00:22:04,169 A STATE OF EMERGENCY AND 879 00:22:04,310 --> 00:22:06,110 SUSPENDED THE ELECTION SO NEW 880 00:22:06,110 --> 00:22:07,110 MAPS COULD BE DRAWN. 881 00:22:07,410 --> 00:22:08,750 AND UNSURPRISINGLY, THOSE MAPS 882 00:22:08,750 --> 00:22:10,470 THEN ELIMINATED ONE OF 883 00:22:10,470 --> 00:22:11,950 LOUISIANA'S TWO MAJORITY-BLACK 884 00:22:11,950 --> 00:22:12,270 DISTRICTS. 885 00:22:12,270 --> 00:22:14,330 SO RIGHT NOW, ONLY ONE OF THE 886 00:22:14,330 --> 00:22:15,650 STATE'S SIX DISTRICTS IS 887 00:22:15,650 --> 00:22:17,390 MAJORITY BLACK, DESPITE THE FACT 888 00:22:17,390 --> 00:22:18,390 ITS POPULATION IS ABOUT 889 00:22:18,889 --> 00:22:19,889 ONE-THIRD BLACK. 890 00:22:20,270 --> 00:22:22,090 NOW, UNDERSTANDABLY, MANY VOTERS 891 00:22:22,090 --> 00:22:23,630 THERE WERE UPSET ABOUT THIS, BUT 892 00:22:23,630 --> 00:22:25,070 WHEN LOUISIANA'S GOVERNOR WAS 893 00:22:25,070 --> 00:22:25,857 ASKED ABOUT THAT, HE SEEMED 894 00:22:25,857 --> 00:22:28,825 PERSONALLY OFFENDED. 895 00:22:28,825 --> 00:22:29,367 >> I THINK A LOT OF AFRICAN 896 00:22:29,367 --> 00:22:30,535 AMERICAN VOTERS IN THIS STATE 897 00:22:30,589 --> 00:22:31,756 MIGHT SAY THEY NEED THAT 898 00:22:31,810 --> 00:22:33,385 PROTECTION WHEN IT COMES TO THE 899 00:22:33,438 --> 00:22:35,420 BALLOT BOX. 900 00:22:35,420 --> 00:22:36,152 >> WELL, I MEAN, NOW WE, I MEAN 901 00:22:36,152 --> 00:22:38,570 WE'D GO BACK TO MARTIN LUTHER 902 00:22:38,570 --> 00:22:40,210 KING, RIGHT? 903 00:22:40,750 --> 00:22:43,030 JUDGE A PERSON BASED UPON THE 904 00:22:43,030 --> 00:22:44,010 CONTENT OF THEIR CHARACTER 905 00:22:44,010 --> 00:22:45,110 RATHER THAN THE COLOR OF THEIR 906 00:22:45,110 --> 00:22:45,520 SKIN. 907 00:22:45,520 --> 00:22:47,050 >> John: WOW. 908 00:22:47,122 --> 00:22:48,122 THAT IS POWERFUL STUFF, LANDRY. 909 00:22:48,190 --> 00:22:49,950 YOU KNOW, THAT ACTUALLY REMINDS 910 00:22:49,950 --> 00:22:51,390 ME OF ANOTHER MARTIN LUTHER KING 911 00:22:51,390 --> 00:22:52,390 QUOTE WHEN HE SAID 912 00:22:52,490 --> 00:22:53,670 "HEY, CAN WHITE PEOPLE PLEASE 913 00:22:53,670 --> 00:22:54,650 LEARN MORE THAN TWO OF MY 914 00:22:54,650 --> 00:22:55,650 FUCKING QUOTES?" 915 00:22:56,590 --> 00:22:59,170 BUT FOR THE RECORD, HISTORY 916 00:22:59,170 --> 00:23:00,170 SHOWS THAT WITHOUT 917 00:23:00,170 --> 00:23:01,770 MAJORITY-BLACK DISTRICTS, BLACK 918 00:23:01,770 --> 00:23:03,310 CANDIDATES IN LOUISIANA HAVE 919 00:23:03,310 --> 00:23:04,690 BASICALLY NO CHANCE OF GETTING 920 00:23:04,690 --> 00:23:05,270 ELECTED. 921 00:23:05,270 --> 00:23:06,690 IN FACT, LOUISIANA, MISSISSIPPI, 922 00:23:06,890 --> 00:23:08,650 AND ALABAMA HAVE NEVER ELECTED 923 00:23:08,650 --> 00:23:10,070 A BLACK REPRESENTATIVE OUTSIDE 924 00:23:10,070 --> 00:23:11,630 A MAJORITY-BLACK DISTRICT -- 925 00:23:11,730 --> 00:23:13,810 AND NO BLACK CANDIDATE HAS BEEN 926 00:23:13,810 --> 00:23:15,290 ELECTED TO STATEWIDE OFFICE IN 927 00:23:15,290 --> 00:23:17,390 LOUISIANA SINCE RECONSTRUCTION. 928 00:23:18,090 --> 00:23:19,850 AND TO HER CREDIT, LANDRY'S 929 00:23:19,850 --> 00:23:21,130 INTERVIEWER ACTUALLY PRESSED HIM 930 00:23:21,130 --> 00:23:21,705 ON THAT POINT. 931 00:23:21,705 --> 00:23:23,329 >> BLACK VOTERS IN LOUISIANA 932 00:23:23,404 --> 00:23:25,595 HAVE TOLD ME THAT THEY FEEL LIKE 933 00:23:25,670 --> 00:23:27,490 IT'S TRUE SOMEONE WHO LOOKS LIKE 934 00:23:27,490 --> 00:23:29,250 YOU WHO HAS NOT LIVED THEIR 935 00:23:29,670 --> 00:23:31,670 EXPERIENCE DOES NOT ADDRESS 936 00:23:31,670 --> 00:23:33,590 THEIR CONCERNS AS WELL AS 937 00:23:33,590 --> 00:23:34,850 SOMEONE WHO HAS LIVED THEIR 938 00:23:34,850 --> 00:23:35,620 EXPERIENCE. 939 00:23:35,620 --> 00:23:37,164 >> WELL, HOW IS IT THAT A LITTLE 940 00:23:37,164 --> 00:23:38,550 COUNTRY BOY WHO GREW UP IN A 941 00:23:38,550 --> 00:23:41,490 TOWN THAT WAS PRIMARILY BLACK 942 00:23:42,110 --> 00:23:43,250 NOT LIVED THROUGH THOSE 943 00:23:43,689 --> 00:23:44,443 EXPERIENCES? 944 00:23:44,443 --> 00:23:45,933 >> BUT I DO THINK A LOT OF FOLKS 945 00:23:45,933 --> 00:23:47,150 MIGHT SAY THOSE EXPERIENCES ARE 946 00:23:47,150 --> 00:23:48,410 NOT NECESSARILY THE SAME. 947 00:23:48,478 --> 00:23:49,949 >> WELL, YOU'RE SAYING I SHOULD 948 00:23:50,016 --> 00:23:51,522 NOT JUDGE A PERSON JUST BECAUSE 949 00:23:52,330 --> 00:23:54,290 THE PERSON IS BLACK. 950 00:23:54,390 --> 00:23:55,530 AND I AGREE WITH THAT. 951 00:23:56,290 --> 00:23:57,930 BUT ISN'T IT THE OPPOSITE THAT I 952 00:23:57,930 --> 00:23:59,290 SHOULDN'T BE JUDGED JUST BECAUSE 953 00:23:59,290 --> 00:24:02,750 I'M WHITE OR HISPANIC OR INDIAN? 954 00:24:03,450 --> 00:24:05,650 I MEAN, HERE WE ARE, AFTER 955 00:24:06,570 --> 00:24:08,730 ALL OF THE DIFFERENT CASES, 956 00:24:08,870 --> 00:24:11,050 AFTER ALL OF THE RECTIFICATION 957 00:24:11,050 --> 00:24:12,130 OF THE SINS OF THE PAST, 958 00:24:12,330 --> 00:24:14,450 WHICH CERTAINLY NO ONE HAS 959 00:24:14,450 --> 00:24:16,970 DENIED, AND YET WE'RE STILL 960 00:24:16,970 --> 00:24:19,750 TRYING TO FIND SOME SLIVER OF 961 00:24:19,970 --> 00:24:21,650 DISCRIMINATION IN RACE. 962 00:24:21,950 --> 00:24:23,230 >> I THINK A LOT OF PEOPLE WOULD 963 00:24:23,230 --> 00:24:23,783 SAY YOU DON'T HAVE TO TRY TO 964 00:24:23,783 --> 00:24:24,032 FIND IT. 965 00:24:24,032 --> 00:24:25,472 IT'S THERE. 966 00:24:25,527 --> 00:24:27,576 >> I WOULD SAY THAT YOU FIND 967 00:24:27,576 --> 00:24:28,290 THAT, THAT IT WOULD RESIDE IN 968 00:24:28,290 --> 00:24:29,670 PEOPLE'S HEARTS, NOT IN THEIR 969 00:24:29,670 --> 00:24:30,124 LAWS. 970 00:24:30,124 --> 00:24:32,152 >> John: OKAY. 971 00:24:32,207 --> 00:24:35,484 THAT MAN IS CLEARLY A HISTORIC 972 00:24:35,484 --> 00:24:36,067 IDIOT, BUT I WILL AGREE WITH HIM 973 00:24:36,067 --> 00:24:36,790 ON ONE POINT. 974 00:24:36,790 --> 00:24:38,590 HE SHOULDN'T BE JUDGED BECAUSE 975 00:24:38,590 --> 00:24:39,149 HE'S WHITE. 976 00:24:39,149 --> 00:24:40,490 HE SHOULD BE JUDGED BECAUSE ONE, 977 00:24:40,810 --> 00:24:41,950 HE JUST HAD TO HAVE THE CONCEPT 978 00:24:41,950 --> 00:24:43,250 OF RACISM EXPLAINED TO HIM 979 00:24:43,250 --> 00:24:44,070 ON TV. 980 00:24:44,070 --> 00:24:45,250 TWO, HE IS FOR SOME REASON 981 00:24:45,250 --> 00:24:46,510 DRESSED LIKE "30 ROCK"'S 982 00:24:46,510 --> 00:24:47,510 LEAP DAY WILLIAM. 983 00:24:47,590 --> 00:24:48,670 AND THREE, BECAUSE HE SOUNDS 984 00:24:48,670 --> 00:24:49,590 LIKE ELMER FUDD IF HE 985 00:24:49,590 --> 00:24:50,670 EXCLUSIVELY WENT TO SCHOOLS 986 00:24:50,670 --> 00:24:51,990 NAMED AFTER ROBERT E. LEE. 987 00:24:52,570 --> 00:24:54,830 BUT LOUISIANA WAS NOT ALONE IN 988 00:24:54,830 --> 00:24:56,050 MOVING FAST AFTER THAT SUPREME 989 00:24:56,050 --> 00:24:56,690 COURT RULING. 990 00:24:56,690 --> 00:24:58,330 TENNESSEE ALSO QUICKLY APPROVED 991 00:24:58,330 --> 00:24:59,810 A NEW MAP THAT SLICES MEMPHIS, 992 00:25:00,110 --> 00:25:01,270 A MAJORITY-BLACK CITY, 993 00:25:01,530 --> 00:25:02,910 INTO THREE EXTREMELY LONG 994 00:25:02,910 --> 00:25:04,590 DISTRICTS THAT DRAG INTO RURAL 995 00:25:04,590 --> 00:25:05,010 AREAS. 996 00:25:05,010 --> 00:25:06,630 AND WHILE DOING SO, TENNESSEE 997 00:25:06,630 --> 00:25:08,270 REPUBLICANS INSISTED THAT THEY 998 00:25:08,270 --> 00:25:09,750 WERE ACTING FOR PURELY PARTISAN 999 00:25:09,750 --> 00:25:11,090 REASONS, WHICH, REMEMBER, THE 1000 00:25:11,090 --> 00:25:12,110 SUPREME COURT HAS SAID 1001 00:25:12,394 --> 00:25:13,135 IS OKAY, AND WERE COMPLETELY 1002 00:25:13,135 --> 00:25:15,533 UNAWARE THAT IN DOING SO, 1003 00:25:15,533 --> 00:25:16,374 THEY WERE SCREWING OVER 1004 00:25:16,374 --> 00:25:17,812 BLACK VOTERS. 1005 00:25:17,910 --> 00:25:19,030 AND WHILE I'VE SHOWN YOU THIS 1006 00:25:19,030 --> 00:25:20,310 CLIP BEFORE, IT'S WORTH SEEING 1007 00:25:20,310 --> 00:25:22,430 AGAIN JUST HOW FLAGRANTLY DUMB 1008 00:25:22,430 --> 00:25:23,990 THEY WERE WILLING TO PRETEND TO 1009 00:25:23,990 --> 00:25:24,363 BE. 1010 00:25:24,363 --> 00:25:26,790 >> TO THE SPONSOR, ARE YOU AWARE 1011 00:25:26,901 --> 00:25:29,837 THAT MEMPHIS IS PREDOMINATELY 1012 00:25:29,949 --> 00:25:30,949 AFRICAN AMERICAN? 1013 00:25:31,021 --> 00:25:32,598 >> SENATOR STEVENS, RESPOND. 1014 00:25:32,672 --> 00:25:34,249 >> THANK YOU, MR. SPEAKER. 1015 00:25:34,321 --> 00:25:38,099 I AM NOT. 1016 00:25:38,172 --> 00:25:42,499 [LAUGHTER] 1017 00:25:42,499 --> 00:25:43,343 [GAVEL] 1018 00:25:43,343 --> 00:25:44,222 >> SENATOR LAMAR. 1019 00:25:44,222 --> 00:25:46,606 >> THANK YOU, MR. SPEAKER. 1020 00:25:46,680 --> 00:25:49,120 SO TO MY SPONSOR, WHO WENT TO 1021 00:25:49,120 --> 00:25:50,729 LAW SCHOOL AT THE UNIVERSITY OF 1022 00:25:50,729 --> 00:25:51,880 MEMPHIS AND LIVED THERE FOR 1023 00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:53,500 THREE YEARS, YOU'RE TELLING ME 1024 00:25:53,500 --> 00:25:54,860 YOU'RE NOT AWARE THAT MEMPHIS IS 1025 00:25:54,880 --> 00:25:56,139 PREDOMINANTLY AFRICAN AMERICAN 1026 00:25:56,320 --> 00:25:57,320 AM I CORRECT? 1027 00:25:57,560 --> 00:25:59,200 >> SENATOR LAMAR, HE'S ANSWERED 1028 00:25:59,200 --> 00:26:00,200 THAT. 1029 00:26:00,480 --> 00:26:01,700 NEXT QUESTION PLEASE. 1030 00:26:01,860 --> 00:26:03,740 >> John: "NEXT QUESTION PLEASE"? 1031 00:26:03,840 --> 00:26:04,879 OH, I'VE GOT A QUESTION! 1032 00:26:04,879 --> 00:26:07,139 ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? 1033 00:26:08,020 --> 00:26:09,560 BECAUSE YOU KNOW THAT GUY'S 1034 00:26:09,560 --> 00:26:10,960 ANSWER WAS BAD WHEN IT GOT A 1035 00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:12,159 LAUGH SO BIG IT SOUNDED LIKE 1036 00:26:12,159 --> 00:26:12,661 THAT DEBATE WAS BEING FILMED IN 1037 00:26:12,661 --> 00:26:15,039 FRONT OF A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE. 1038 00:26:16,440 --> 00:26:18,399 MEANWHILE ALABAMA ALSO CALLED 1039 00:26:18,399 --> 00:26:19,580 A SPECIAL SESSION TO FORCE 1040 00:26:19,580 --> 00:26:20,940 A SERIES OF VOTES ON ITS MAPS 1041 00:26:20,940 --> 00:26:21,599 AT BOTH THE STATE 1042 00:26:21,599 --> 00:26:22,729 AND CONGRESSIONAL LEVELS. 1043 00:26:22,729 --> 00:26:23,740 AND AS YOU'LL HEAR 1044 00:26:23,740 --> 00:26:25,080 THIS STATE SENATOR POINT OUT, 1045 00:26:25,340 --> 00:26:26,480 IT FORCED ONE OF THOSE VOTES 1046 00:26:26,480 --> 00:26:28,120 THROUGH, EVEN AS THE BUILDING 1047 00:26:28,120 --> 00:26:29,220 WAS BEING EVACUATED 1048 00:26:29,220 --> 00:26:30,520 FOR A TORNADO WARNING. 1049 00:26:30,563 --> 00:26:31,563 [ALARM BLARING] 1050 00:26:31,563 --> 00:26:31,914 >> NOW, YOU KNOW WHAT? 1051 00:26:31,914 --> 00:26:33,895 THIS DON'T EVEN MAKE SENSE. 1052 00:26:33,940 --> 00:26:35,159 WE SHOULD'VE GONE INTO A 1053 00:26:35,159 --> 00:26:36,680 RECESS AND THEN WAITED UNTIL 1054 00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:38,919 AFTER THE WEATHER TO TAKE THIS 1055 00:26:38,919 --> 00:26:39,579 VOTE. 1056 00:26:39,579 --> 00:26:41,319 BUT THEY WANT TO DO THIS SO BAD. 1057 00:26:45,300 --> 00:26:46,300 THAT'S -- THAT'S RIDICULOUS. 1058 00:26:46,960 --> 00:26:47,960 THAT IS RIDICULOUS. 1059 00:26:47,976 --> 00:26:50,941 >> John: IT'S TRUE, THEY FORCED 1060 00:26:50,941 --> 00:26:51,941 THE VOTE DURING AN EVACUATION. 1061 00:26:51,980 --> 00:26:53,100 WHICH ISN'T JUST DISRESPECTFUL 1062 00:26:53,100 --> 00:26:54,500 TO ALABAMA VOTERS AND THOSE WHO 1063 00:26:54,500 --> 00:26:55,480 FOUGHT FOR CIVIL RIGHTS -- 1064 00:26:55,480 --> 00:26:57,159 SOMEHOW, IT EVEN MANAGES TO BE 1065 00:26:57,159 --> 00:26:58,840 DISRESPECTFUL TO THE TORNADO. 1066 00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:02,260 HERE'S A STORM DOING ITS VERY 1067 00:27:02,260 --> 00:27:03,720 BEST TO EXTEND FROM THE BASE OF 1068 00:27:03,720 --> 00:27:05,579 A CUMULONIMBUS CLOUD AND FORM 1069 00:27:05,579 --> 00:27:07,379 A RAPIDLY ROTATING COLUMN OF AIR 1070 00:27:07,780 --> 00:27:09,340 AND STATE LEGISLATORS ARE 1071 00:27:09,340 --> 00:27:10,800 JUST WILLFULLY IGNORING THAT TO 1072 00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:12,399 IMPLEMENT RACIST VOTING MAPS. 1073 00:27:12,460 --> 00:27:13,620 HAVE SOME FUCKING RESPECT! 1074 00:27:15,040 --> 00:27:17,139 AND IN CASE THAT WASN'T A POTENT 1075 00:27:17,139 --> 00:27:18,280 ENOUGH SUMMARY OF THINGS, WHEN 1076 00:27:18,280 --> 00:27:19,500 THE SUPREME COURT GAVE ALABAMA 1077 00:27:19,500 --> 00:27:21,186 FINAL CLEARANCE TO USE 1078 00:27:21,186 --> 00:27:21,488 A CONGRESSIONAL MAP THAT'D 1079 00:27:21,488 --> 00:27:23,484 PREVIOUSLY BEEN FOUND TO BE 1080 00:27:23,539 --> 00:27:24,720 RACIALLY DISCRIMINATORY, THE 1081 00:27:24,860 --> 00:27:26,620 STATE'S AG RELEASED THIS 1082 00:27:26,620 --> 00:27:27,720 CELEBRATORY VIDEO. 1083 00:27:27,720 --> 00:27:28,527 >> MY JOB IN THIS OFFICE WAS TO 1084 00:27:28,527 --> 00:27:30,181 PUT THE LEGISLATURE IN THE BEST 1085 00:27:30,259 --> 00:27:32,859 POSSIBLE LEGAL POSITION TO DRAW 1086 00:27:32,860 --> 00:27:34,620 A CONGRESSIONAL MAP THAT FAVORS 1087 00:27:34,620 --> 00:27:36,800 REPUBLICANS 7-0. 1088 00:27:37,300 --> 00:27:38,840 MY OFFICE HAS NEVER TAKEN THE 1089 00:27:38,840 --> 00:27:40,020 CHARGE OF OUR STATE MOTTO 1090 00:27:40,020 --> 00:27:40,860 LIGHTLY. 1091 00:27:40,860 --> 00:27:42,500 WE DARE DEFEND OUR RIGHTS. 1092 00:27:43,727 --> 00:27:46,564 STAY TUNED. 1093 00:27:46,612 --> 00:27:47,670 >> John: WOW. 1094 00:27:47,719 --> 00:27:49,811 WHAT A SMILE. 1095 00:27:49,860 --> 00:27:51,470 HE LOOKS LIKE MR. ROGERS IF HE'D 1096 00:27:51,470 --> 00:27:52,840 MADE A FAMOUS EPISODE IN FAVOR 1097 00:27:52,840 --> 00:27:54,260 OF SEGREGATION INSTEAD OF 1098 00:27:54,260 --> 00:27:55,100 AGAINST IT. 1099 00:27:55,100 --> 00:27:56,899 BUT DESPITE WHAT HE SAID THERE 1100 00:27:56,979 --> 00:27:57,979 IMPLEMENTING RACIALLY 1101 00:27:58,020 --> 00:27:59,620 DISCRIMINATORY MAPS IS NOT 1102 00:27:59,620 --> 00:28:01,860 ACTUALLY AN AG'S JOB, AT ALL. 1103 00:28:02,159 --> 00:28:03,480 THAT'S LIKE IF YOU WENT TO A 1104 00:28:03,549 --> 00:28:04,580 BUILD-A-BEAR WORKSHOP AND ONE OF 1105 00:28:04,580 --> 00:28:05,525 THE EMPLOYEES SAID, "MY JOB IN 1106 00:28:05,525 --> 00:28:05,977 THIS STORE IS TO BAPTIZE 1107 00:28:05,977 --> 00:28:07,657 EVERY STUFFED ANIMAL SO 1108 00:28:07,657 --> 00:28:08,234 THAT THEY MAY ENTER THE KINGDOM 1109 00:28:08,234 --> 00:28:10,648 OF HEAVEN." 1110 00:28:10,700 --> 00:28:12,280 NO, IT IS VERY MUCH NOT THAT. 1111 00:28:12,399 --> 00:28:14,060 YOU JUST WANTED TO DO IT. 1112 00:28:14,500 --> 00:28:16,040 AND TO BE HONEST, I'D LIKE MY 1113 00:28:16,040 --> 00:28:17,139 PLATYPUS TO GO TO HELL, 1114 00:28:17,240 --> 00:28:18,240 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 1115 00:28:18,940 --> 00:28:20,800 BUT INCREDIBLY, I'M STILL NOT 1116 00:28:20,800 --> 00:28:22,600 DONE, BECAUSE FLORIDA ALSO 1117 00:28:22,740 --> 00:28:23,940 PASSED A NEW MAP, WHICH 1118 00:28:23,940 --> 00:28:25,200 COULD ADD THREE TO FOUR 1119 00:28:25,200 --> 00:28:26,040 REPUBLICAN SEATS. 1120 00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:27,260 NOW, PLANS FOR THAT HAD 1121 00:28:27,260 --> 00:28:28,500 TECHNICALLY BEEN IN THE WORKS 1122 00:28:28,500 --> 00:28:29,500 BEFORE THE SUPREME COURT 1123 00:28:29,500 --> 00:28:31,060 DECISION, BUT RON DESANTIS 1124 00:28:31,060 --> 00:28:32,480 SEEMED EXTRA-CONFIDENT 1125 00:28:32,480 --> 00:28:33,000 AFTERWARDS. 1126 00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:33,700 AND I'M GOING TO WARN YOU: 1127 00:28:33,700 --> 00:28:36,060 YOU ARE NOT READY FOR THE CHOICE 1128 00:28:36,060 --> 00:28:37,600 HE MAKES MIDWAY THROUGH THIS 1129 00:28:37,600 --> 00:28:37,939 CLIP. 1130 00:28:37,939 --> 00:28:39,258 >> SOMETIMES, YOU GOT PEOPLE IN 1131 00:28:39,319 --> 00:28:42,478 D.C., IN NEW YORK, WHO, WHO MAY 1132 00:28:43,340 --> 00:28:44,940 NOT LIKE, AND THEY MAY SAY 1133 00:28:45,759 --> 00:28:46,759 DIFFERENT STUFF. 1134 00:28:47,259 --> 00:28:48,399 AND WE'VE GOT THIS GUY, 1135 00:28:48,980 --> 00:28:50,540 HAKEEM JEFFRIES. 1136 00:28:51,959 --> 00:28:52,513 OKAY? 1137 00:28:52,513 --> 00:28:56,015 AND YOU KNOW, HE GOES OUT THERE 1138 00:28:56,049 --> 00:28:58,942 AND HE'S LIKE, UM, 1139 00:28:58,942 --> 00:29:01,000 "WE'RE GONNA DO MAXIMUM WARFARE 1140 00:29:01,499 --> 00:29:02,880 AGAINST REPUBLICANS. 1141 00:29:03,920 --> 00:29:05,560 FLORIDA REPUBLICANS, YOU F 1142 00:29:05,580 --> 00:29:07,139 AROUND, YOU GONNA FIND OUT." 1143 00:29:07,139 --> 00:29:08,047 ALL THIS STUFF. 1144 00:29:08,047 --> 00:29:09,228 >> John: HOLY SHIT! 1145 00:29:09,314 --> 00:29:10,539 I NEVER THOUGHT I'D SEE 1146 00:29:10,625 --> 00:29:13,162 BLACKFACE WITHOUT THE MAKEUP 1147 00:29:13,162 --> 00:29:14,035 BUT IT SEEMS THERE'S A FIRST 1148 00:29:14,035 --> 00:29:17,751 TIME FOR EVERYTHING. 1149 00:29:17,840 --> 00:29:19,600 I DON'T HAVE A TON TO SAY 1150 00:29:19,600 --> 00:29:20,639 ABOUT THAT REALLY EXCEPT, A, 1151 00:29:21,340 --> 00:29:22,340 FUCK YOU! 1152 00:29:22,920 --> 00:29:24,899 AND B, MAYBE SOMEONE SHOW THAT 1153 00:29:24,899 --> 00:29:26,460 CLIP TO GOVERNOR LOLLIPOP HERE 1154 00:29:26,460 --> 00:29:27,139 THE NEXT TIME HE DESCRIBES 1155 00:29:27,139 --> 00:29:28,760 RACISM AS SOMETHING YOU NEED TO 1156 00:29:28,760 --> 00:29:29,940 TRY AND FIND. 1157 00:29:29,940 --> 00:29:32,420 AND WHEN YOU TAKE THIS WHOLE 1158 00:29:32,420 --> 00:29:33,960 REDISTRICTING BACK-AND-FORTH 1159 00:29:33,960 --> 00:29:34,960 TOGETHER, IT WILL -- 1160 00:29:34,960 --> 00:29:35,899 AS I SAID EARLIER -- 1161 00:29:35,899 --> 00:29:37,020 PROBABLY GIVE REPUBLICANS 1162 00:29:37,020 --> 00:29:39,040 UP TO 12 SEATS IN THE HOUSE. 1163 00:29:39,080 --> 00:29:40,600 WHICH DOESN'T MEAN THEY'LL 1164 00:29:40,600 --> 00:29:42,100 AUTOMATICALLY WIN THE HOUSE IN 1165 00:29:42,100 --> 00:29:43,080 NOVEMBER. 1166 00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:44,659 BUT IT MAKES THE MARGIN FOR 1167 00:29:44,659 --> 00:29:46,380 DEMOCRATS MEANINGFULLY SMALLER. 1168 00:29:46,480 --> 00:29:48,100 ALSO EVERYTHING YOU'VE SEEN SO 1169 00:29:48,100 --> 00:29:49,740 FAR ONLY ADDRESSES WHAT WAS ABLE 1170 00:29:49,740 --> 00:29:51,040 TO BE DONE BEFORE THE MIDTERMS. 1171 00:29:51,420 --> 00:29:52,860 BUT IT WON'T END THERE. 1172 00:29:53,280 --> 00:29:54,399 IN THE COMING YEARS, REPUBLICANS 1173 00:29:54,399 --> 00:29:55,000 IN SOUTHERN STATES 1174 00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:56,100 COULD ULTIMATELY ELIMINATE 1175 00:29:56,340 --> 00:29:57,260 MAJORITY-MINORITY DISTRICTS 1176 00:29:57,260 --> 00:29:59,260 ALTOGETHER, TAKING AMERICA BACK 1177 00:29:59,260 --> 00:30:01,000 TO THE JIM CROW ERA, WHEN THERE 1178 00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:02,500 WERE NO BLACK REPRESENTATIVES IN 1179 00:30:02,500 --> 00:30:04,000 SOUTHERN STATES WITH SIZABLE 1180 00:30:05,027 --> 00:30:06,257 BLACK POPULATIONS. 1181 00:30:06,257 --> 00:30:07,013 AND THERE'LL LIKELY BE MAJOR 1182 00:30:07,013 --> 00:30:08,172 IMPACTS ON OTHER LEVELS OF 1183 00:30:08,172 --> 00:30:09,172 GOVERNMENT, TOO, FROM CITY 1184 00:30:09,220 --> 00:30:10,920 COUNCILS TO SCHOOL BOARDS TO 1185 00:30:10,920 --> 00:30:12,220 STATE LEGISLATURES. 1186 00:30:12,320 --> 00:30:14,500 AND FOR THOSE WHO FOUGHT SO HARD 1187 00:30:14,500 --> 00:30:15,560 FOR THEIR VOTING RIGHTS, 1188 00:30:16,139 --> 00:30:17,440 WATCHING THEM GET STRIPPED AWAY 1189 00:30:17,440 --> 00:30:19,000 THIS FAST IS BRUTAL. 1190 00:30:19,620 --> 00:30:20,860 BECAUSE IT'S WORTH REMEMBERING 1191 00:30:21,280 --> 00:30:22,340 THE PROGRESS THAT'S CURRENTLY 1192 00:30:22,340 --> 00:30:24,620 BEING UNDONE, HAPPENED IN LIVING 1193 00:30:24,620 --> 00:30:25,600 MEMORY FOR MANY. 1194 00:30:25,600 --> 00:30:27,040 IN FACT, JUST LISTEN TO THIS 1195 00:30:27,040 --> 00:30:28,440 MAN OUTSIDE THE FLORIDA STATE 1196 00:30:28,440 --> 00:30:30,060 HOUSE IN APRIL, AS THEY WERE 1197 00:30:30,060 --> 00:30:31,100 PASSING THEIR NEW MAP. 1198 00:30:31,170 --> 00:30:33,809 >> BEING 79, I COME FROM 1199 00:30:33,882 --> 00:30:37,606 A JIM CROW ERA WHERE BLACKS WERE 1200 00:30:37,677 --> 00:30:42,486 SECOND CLASS CITIZENS. 1201 00:30:42,560 --> 00:30:45,060 IT WILL NOT HAPPEN AGAIN. 1202 00:30:45,500 --> 00:30:46,580 I FEEL BAD ABOUT IT. 1203 00:30:46,620 --> 00:30:48,340 NOT FOR ME, BECAUSE I HAVE 1204 00:30:48,340 --> 00:30:49,740 A SHORT TIME BEING HERE. 1205 00:30:54,300 --> 00:30:56,320 BUT FOR MY GRANDCHILDREN, MY 1206 00:30:56,759 --> 00:30:58,760 GREAT-GRANDS, I DO NOT WANT 1207 00:30:58,760 --> 00:31:00,580 THEM GOING THROUGH WHAT I 1208 00:31:00,580 --> 00:31:01,580 EXPERIENCED. 1209 00:31:01,720 --> 00:31:03,560 >> John: YEAH, AND IF THAT 1210 00:31:03,560 --> 00:31:04,700 DOESN'T MAKE THE POINT HERE, 1211 00:31:04,819 --> 00:31:06,680 I REALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT DOES. 1212 00:31:07,200 --> 00:31:08,340 SO WHAT DO WE DO? 1213 00:31:08,399 --> 00:31:09,540 WELL, DEMOCRATS AREN'T 1214 00:31:09,540 --> 00:31:10,840 COMPLETELY OUT OF OPTIONS. 1215 00:31:11,200 --> 00:31:12,320 AFTER NOVEMBER, MORE STATES 1216 00:31:12,320 --> 00:31:13,659 UNDER DEMOCRATIC CONTROL COULD 1217 00:31:13,659 --> 00:31:15,170 PURSUE PARTISAN GERRYMANDERS TO 1218 00:31:15,170 --> 00:31:16,520 TRY AND OFFSET THE DAMAGE, FROM 1219 00:31:16,520 --> 00:31:17,780 NEW YORK TO MARYLAND TO 1220 00:31:17,780 --> 00:31:18,860 ILLINOIS, WHERE ONE HOUSE 1221 00:31:18,860 --> 00:31:19,834 DEMOCRAT HAS SAID THERE'S A 1222 00:31:19,834 --> 00:31:22,089 NUCLEAR OPTION OF A 17-0 MAP. 1223 00:31:22,159 --> 00:31:23,680 MEANING, NO REPUBLICAN DISTRICTS 1224 00:31:23,680 --> 00:31:24,580 AT ALL. 1225 00:31:24,580 --> 00:31:26,780 AND WHILE INITIALLY, THE IDEA OF 1226 00:31:26,780 --> 00:31:28,520 TOTAL WARFARE HERE IS UNDENIABLY 1227 00:31:28,700 --> 00:31:30,419 SATISFYING, IT'S WORTH 1228 00:31:30,419 --> 00:31:32,200 REMEMBERING, THERE ARE MORE RED 1229 00:31:32,200 --> 00:31:33,200 STATES THAT COULD JUMP IN AND 1230 00:31:33,411 --> 00:31:34,100 RESPOND, TOO, AND YOU MAY NOT 1231 00:31:34,100 --> 00:31:36,744 LIKE HOW THAT FIGHT ENDS. 1232 00:31:36,820 --> 00:31:38,460 LOOK, THE LONG-TERM GOAL HERE 1233 00:31:38,460 --> 00:31:40,139 SHOULD PROBABLY BE TO FIND A WAY 1234 00:31:40,139 --> 00:31:42,180 TO TRY AND UN-FUCK EVERY STATE'S 1235 00:31:42,180 --> 00:31:42,580 MAPS. 1236 00:31:42,580 --> 00:31:44,139 AND IF DEMOCRATS ARE ABLE TO GET 1237 00:31:44,139 --> 00:31:45,980 BACK INTO POWER, THERE ARE WAYS 1238 00:31:45,980 --> 00:31:47,260 TO GET TO THAT POINT. 1239 00:31:47,560 --> 00:31:48,560 FOR INSTANCE, CONGRESS COULD 1240 00:31:48,560 --> 00:31:49,560 PASS A NEW VERSION OF 1241 00:31:49,600 --> 00:31:50,700 THE JOHN LEWIS ACT, WHICH WOULD 1242 00:31:50,720 --> 00:31:52,080 AMONG OTHER THINGS, MODERNIZE 1243 00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:53,320 AND REVITALIZE THE VOTING RIGHTS 1244 00:31:53,320 --> 00:31:54,840 ACT, AND BAN PARTISAN 1245 00:31:55,526 --> 00:31:56,934 GERRYMANDERING. 1246 00:31:56,980 --> 00:31:58,319 THE HOUSE ACTUALLY PASSED IT IN 1247 00:31:58,365 --> 00:31:59,588 2022, BUT IT COULDN'T GET PAST 1248 00:31:59,635 --> 00:32:00,674 A SENATE FILIBUSTER. 1249 00:32:00,720 --> 00:32:03,500 BUT THE HARD TRUTH IS, WE MAY 1250 00:32:03,500 --> 00:32:04,940 NEED TO THINK BIGGER THAN THAT. 1251 00:32:05,060 --> 00:32:07,100 BECAUSE A NEW VOTING RIGHTS LAW 1252 00:32:07,100 --> 00:32:09,340 ISN'T GOING TO MEAN MUCH, IF THE 1253 00:32:09,340 --> 00:32:11,280 SUPREME COURT JUST STEPS IN TO 1254 00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:12,139 UNDO IT. 1255 00:32:12,139 --> 00:32:13,800 THAT IS WHY WE ALSO NEED 1256 00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:15,120 SIGNIFICANT SUPREME COURT 1257 00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:16,120 REFORM. 1258 00:32:16,179 --> 00:32:17,300 THERE'S ACTUALLY A HOUSE BILL 1259 00:32:17,300 --> 00:32:18,820 THAT WOULD BE A START, PROVIDING 1260 00:32:18,820 --> 00:32:19,860 EACH PRESIDENT EQUAL 1261 00:32:20,109 --> 00:32:21,109 OPPORTUNITIES TO APPOINT 1262 00:32:21,109 --> 00:32:22,100 JUSTICES, BY ESTABLISHING 1263 00:32:22,100 --> 00:32:23,899 STAGGERED 18-YEAR TERM LIMITS 1264 00:32:23,899 --> 00:32:24,679 FOR THE COURT. 1265 00:32:24,679 --> 00:32:25,620 AND WHO KNOWS? 1266 00:32:25,620 --> 00:32:27,480 MAYBE THAT COULD BRING THE 1267 00:32:27,480 --> 00:32:29,100 CHANGE THAT THIS MAGNIFICENT 1268 00:32:33,548 --> 00:32:35,334 HOME, THIS BEAUTIFUL 1269 00:32:35,620 --> 00:32:37,700 LOOK, THE CURRENT SITUATION IS 1270 00:32:37,700 --> 00:32:38,620 CLEARLY UNTENABLE. 1271 00:32:38,620 --> 00:32:40,740 WHICH IS WHY ALL OPTIONS SHOULD 1272 00:32:40,740 --> 00:32:42,200 BE ON THE TABLE TO GET US TO A 1273 00:32:42,200 --> 00:32:43,740 SYSTEM WHERE IDEALLY -- 1274 00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:45,460 IF I MAY QUOTE SOMEONE USING 1275 00:32:45,460 --> 00:32:46,940 WHAT TURNED OUT TO BE, BY FAR, 1276 00:32:46,940 --> 00:32:48,540 THE LEAST OFFENSIVE ACCENT 1277 00:32:48,540 --> 00:32:49,540 YOU'VE HEARD TONIGHT, 1278 00:32:53,698 --> 00:32:54,819 [COMICAL BRITISH ACCENT] 1279 00:32:54,819 --> 00:32:55,538 THE VOTERS CHOOSE THEIR 1280 00:32:55,538 --> 00:32:56,178 REPRESENTATIVES, NOT THE 1281 00:32:56,178 --> 00:32:56,899 REPRESENTATIVE CHOOSING THEIR 1282 00:32:56,899 --> 00:32:57,339 BLOODY VOTERS. 1283 00:32:57,339 --> 00:32:58,819 AND NOW THIS. 1284 00:32:58,893 --> 00:33:00,317 >> Announcer: AND NOW LET'S 1285 00:33:00,392 --> 00:33:05,265 CHECK BACK IN WITH JEREMY AND 1286 00:33:05,339 --> 00:33:11,449 TOM. 1287 00:33:11,524 --> 00:33:15,947 ♪ ♪ 1288 00:33:16,022 --> 00:33:22,693 SPEAK OF THAT IS DELICIOUS. 1289 00:33:22,769 --> 00:33:24,410 I MEAN, THAT IS TASTY. 1290 00:33:27,900 --> 00:33:29,019 WHAT, TOM? 1291 00:33:29,194 --> 00:33:31,633 >> John: MOVING ON. 1292 00:33:32,450 --> 00:33:34,010 BEFORE WE GO, WE'RE GOING TO BE 1293 00:33:34,010 --> 00:33:35,390 OFF FOR THE NEXT FEW WEEKS, SO I 1294 00:33:35,390 --> 00:33:36,550 WANTED TO SHARE A QUICK UPDATE 1295 00:33:36,550 --> 00:33:37,690 ABOUT SOAP OPERAS. 1296 00:33:37,930 --> 00:33:39,390 YOU MAY REMEMBER, BACK IN MARCH 1297 00:33:39,390 --> 00:33:40,310 WE DISCOVERED THAT 1298 00:33:40,310 --> 00:33:41,670 STEPHEN A. SMITH HAS BEEN 1299 00:33:41,670 --> 00:33:42,610 QUIETLY PLAYING THE ROLE OF 1300 00:33:42,610 --> 00:33:43,870 BRICK ON "GENERAL HOSPITAL" 1301 00:33:43,870 --> 00:33:45,510 FOR THE LAST 10 YEARS, WHICH 1302 00:33:45,510 --> 00:33:47,770 FILLED ME WITH BOTH IMMENSE 1303 00:33:47,770 --> 00:33:49,390 CONFUSION AND SCORCHING HOT 1304 00:33:49,390 --> 00:33:50,390 JEALOUSY. 1305 00:33:51,010 --> 00:33:52,550 SO I DID THE ONLY THING ANY 1306 00:33:52,550 --> 00:33:53,810 SANE PERSON WOULD IN THAT 1307 00:33:53,810 --> 00:33:54,330 SITUATION. 1308 00:33:54,330 --> 00:33:55,390 I OFFERED MYSELF TO ANY 1309 00:33:55,390 --> 00:33:56,570 SOAP OPERA THAT WOULD CREATE 1310 00:33:56,570 --> 00:33:58,650 A ROLE FOR ME, AN OFFER I MADE 1311 00:33:58,650 --> 00:34:00,160 RIGHT BEFORE I WAS SHOT ON STAGE 1312 00:34:00,160 --> 00:34:01,950 BY COLONEL SANDERS, WHICH I 1313 00:34:02,030 --> 00:34:03,130 PROMISE MADE PERFECT SENSE 1314 00:34:03,130 --> 00:34:03,810 AT THE TIME. 1315 00:34:03,810 --> 00:34:06,350 NOW, SINCE THEN, YOU MIGHT'VE 1316 00:34:06,350 --> 00:34:07,620 STUMBLED ACROSS HEADLINES ABOUT 1317 00:34:07,620 --> 00:34:08,770 MY PASSIONATE REQUEST IN 1318 00:34:08,770 --> 00:34:09,770 OUTLETS LIKE SOAPHUB, 1319 00:34:10,630 --> 00:34:11,710 DAYTIME CONFIDENTIAL, 1320 00:34:11,949 --> 00:34:13,330 AND CLEVELAND.COM. 1321 00:34:14,350 --> 00:34:15,810 ALTHOUGH WHEN "THE DAILY MAIL" 1322 00:34:15,810 --> 00:34:17,449 WROTE ABOUT IT, THEY WEREN'T SO 1323 00:34:17,449 --> 00:34:18,570 KIND, AS THEIR HEADLINE WAS 1324 00:34:18,850 --> 00:34:19,850 "JOHN OLIVER'S PRIVATE PANIC: 1325 00:34:20,710 --> 00:34:22,370 LATE-NIGHT CURSE SPREADS AND 1326 00:34:22,370 --> 00:34:24,350 HOST PREPARES FOR WORST AS 1327 00:34:24,350 --> 00:34:25,589 INSIDERS REVEAL HIS DESPERATE 1328 00:34:25,589 --> 00:34:26,449 PLAN B 1329 00:34:26,449 --> 00:34:28,050 AND THE INDUSTRY WHISPERS 1330 00:34:28,590 --> 00:34:30,010 SWIRLING ABOUT HIS FATE." 1331 00:34:30,909 --> 00:34:34,210 FIRST, LET ME SAY, IT IS AN 1332 00:34:34,489 --> 00:34:36,050 HONOR TO BE FEATURED ON A 1333 00:34:36,050 --> 00:34:37,290 WEBSITE THAT JUST THIS WEEK 1334 00:34:37,290 --> 00:34:38,250 PUBLISHED THE STORY: 1335 00:34:38,250 --> 00:34:39,889 "I HAD SO MUCH SEX DURING MY 1336 00:34:39,889 --> 00:34:41,150 SLUTTIEST EVER SUMMER... 1337 00:34:41,150 --> 00:34:42,790 UNTIL ONE GIRLFRIEND CAUGHT ME 1338 00:34:42,790 --> 00:34:43,949 DOING SOMETHING SO SHAMEFUL, 1339 00:34:43,949 --> 00:34:45,349 I THOUGHT I MIGHT DIE." 1340 00:34:46,050 --> 00:34:47,449 BUT TO BE CLEAR, 1341 00:34:48,310 --> 00:34:50,290 SOAP ACTING IS NOT MY PLAN B. 1342 00:34:50,909 --> 00:34:52,409 MY ACTUAL PLAN B IS, OBVIOUSLY, 1343 00:34:52,409 --> 00:34:54,050 BEING A MR. BEAN IMPERSONATOR 1344 00:34:54,050 --> 00:34:55,170 FOR THE STRANGEST LITTLE 1345 00:34:55,170 --> 00:34:56,650 CHILDREN'S BIRTHDAY PARTIES. 1346 00:34:57,470 --> 00:34:59,110 AND TO CLARIFY THINGS EVEN 1347 00:34:59,110 --> 00:35:00,330 FURTHER, MY PLEA WASN'T ME 1348 00:35:00,710 --> 00:35:02,090 "PREPARING FOR THE WORST," 1349 00:35:02,470 --> 00:35:03,949 I SIMPLY OFFERED MY HYPOTHETICAL 1350 00:35:03,949 --> 00:35:06,130 ACTING ABILITIES TO ANY SOAP 1351 00:35:06,130 --> 00:35:07,230 THAT WOULD MEET MY TERMS, WHICH 1352 00:35:07,470 --> 00:35:08,470 WERE, I WANTED TO PLAY A 1353 00:35:08,470 --> 00:35:09,350 CHARACTER WITH A RIDICULOUS 1354 00:35:09,350 --> 00:35:11,409 NAME, I WANTED A JUICY STORYLINE 1355 00:35:11,409 --> 00:35:13,570 LIKE MURDER OR SLAPPING, AND I 1356 00:35:13,590 --> 00:35:14,830 WANTED A DRAMATIC CLOSE-UP 1357 00:35:14,830 --> 00:35:15,490 OF MY FACE. 1358 00:35:15,490 --> 00:35:16,710 WELL, I'M THRILLED TO ANNOUNCE 1359 00:35:16,710 --> 00:35:17,929 I HAVE AN UPDATE. 1360 00:35:18,070 --> 00:35:20,429 BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW IF YOU'VE 1361 00:35:20,429 --> 00:35:21,470 EVER HEARD OF A LITTLE SHOW 1362 00:35:21,470 --> 00:35:22,990 CALLED "DAYS OF OUR LIVES." 1363 00:35:23,350 --> 00:35:25,650 THE AMERICAN ICON THAT GAVE US 1364 00:35:25,930 --> 00:35:26,930 UNFORGETTABLE MOMENTS LIKE 1365 00:35:27,110 --> 00:35:28,710 THE DEVIL POSSESSING MARLENA 1366 00:35:29,190 --> 00:35:30,470 SAMI BRADY TRYING TO RESCUE 1367 00:35:30,470 --> 00:35:31,329 PHILIP FROM IRAQ 1368 00:35:31,329 --> 00:35:33,469 BY GOING IN FULL SOLDIER DRAG 1369 00:35:34,090 --> 00:35:35,550 AND BO BRADY DISCOVERING 1370 00:35:35,550 --> 00:35:36,949 A MYSTERIOUS WOMAN IN A BAYOU 1371 00:35:36,949 --> 00:35:37,870 THAT EVERYONE CALLED "SWAMP 1372 00:35:37,870 --> 00:35:39,010 GIRL" UNTIL LEARNING SHE WAS 1373 00:35:39,010 --> 00:35:40,010 ACTUALLY A PRINCESS. 1374 00:35:40,010 --> 00:35:42,310 WELL, I'M HAPPY TO SAY THAT I'VE 1375 00:35:42,310 --> 00:35:44,010 ALREADY TAPED A WEEK OF EPISODES 1376 00:35:44,010 --> 00:35:45,130 ON "DAYS OF OUR LIVES," 1377 00:35:45,389 --> 00:35:48,030 WHICH IS CLEARLY A HUGE HONOR. 1378 00:35:48,690 --> 00:35:50,170 IT'S BEEN HOME TO SOME OF THE 1379 00:35:50,170 --> 00:35:52,420 MOST RENOWNED SOAP ACTORS LIKE 1380 00:35:52,420 --> 00:35:53,420 DIEDRE HALL, 1381 00:35:53,630 --> 00:35:54,889 SUSAN SEAFORTH HAYES, 1382 00:35:54,889 --> 00:35:56,490 AND JOHN ANISTON, OF THE 1383 00:35:56,490 --> 00:35:56,926 [CLAP, CLAP, CLAP, CLAP, CLAP] 1384 00:35:56,926 --> 00:35:58,648 ANISTONS. 1385 00:35:59,210 --> 00:36:00,490 IT'S ALSO FEATURED GUEST 1386 00:36:00,490 --> 00:36:01,750 APPEARANCES FROM LEGENDS LIKE 1387 00:36:01,750 --> 00:36:03,370 DICK VAN DYKE, BETTY WHITE, 1388 00:36:03,510 --> 00:36:04,710 AND NOW ME! 1389 00:36:05,110 --> 00:36:07,190 THE ONLY OTHER TIME YOU'D HEAR 1390 00:36:07,190 --> 00:36:08,690 MY NAME ALONGSIDE THOSE TWO 1391 00:36:08,690 --> 00:36:09,710 WOULD BE IF SOMEONE WERE TRYING 1392 00:36:09,710 --> 00:36:10,710 TO ANSWER THE QUESTION: 1393 00:36:10,810 --> 00:36:12,150 "NAME THREE CELEBRITIES YOU 1394 00:36:12,150 --> 00:36:13,610 COULD REASONABLY GUESS WERE BORN 1395 00:36:13,610 --> 00:36:14,710 IN THE 1920s?" 1396 00:36:15,530 --> 00:36:16,890 BUT THE TRUTH IS 1397 00:36:17,490 --> 00:36:18,970 "DAYS OF OUR LIVES" WASN'T 1398 00:36:18,970 --> 00:36:20,070 ACTUALLY THE ONLY SHOW THAT 1399 00:36:20,070 --> 00:36:20,610 REACHED OUT. 1400 00:36:20,610 --> 00:36:21,950 AND IF YOU READ THAT DAILY MAIL 1401 00:36:21,950 --> 00:36:23,570 ARTICLE, YOU'D HAVE SEEN THEY 1402 00:36:23,570 --> 00:36:25,270 CLAIMED THAT "GENERAL HOSPITAL" 1403 00:36:25,270 --> 00:36:26,930 PITCHED ME "AN EMOTIONAL ROLE", 1404 00:36:27,090 --> 00:36:28,730 BUT I "TURNED IT DOWN" BECAUSE, 1405 00:36:28,730 --> 00:36:29,730 AND I QUOTE, 1406 00:36:29,770 --> 00:36:31,330 "HE ONLY WANTS TO PLAY FUN 1407 00:36:31,330 --> 00:36:32,330 PARTS." 1408 00:36:32,590 --> 00:36:34,330 AND I DON'T KNOW WHERE THE FUCK 1409 00:36:34,330 --> 00:36:35,330 THEY GOT THAT FROM. 1410 00:36:35,930 --> 00:36:37,470 BECAUSE IF "GENERAL HOSPITAL" 1411 00:36:37,470 --> 00:36:39,510 HAD GENUINELY PITCHED ME A ROLE 1412 00:36:39,510 --> 00:36:40,610 AND GIVEN ME THE CHANCE TO 1413 00:36:40,610 --> 00:36:41,930 HANG OUT IN PORT CHARLES, 1414 00:36:41,930 --> 00:36:43,210 THE HOME OF LUKE AND LAURA, 1415 00:36:43,290 --> 00:36:44,530 THE CORINTHOS FAMILY, AND 1416 00:36:44,670 --> 00:36:47,190 BRICK -- IF THEY'D GIVEN ME THE 1417 00:36:47,190 --> 00:36:48,870 CHANCE TO JOIN THE RANKS OF 1418 00:36:48,870 --> 00:36:50,150 GUEST STARS LIKE LIZ TAYLOR, 1419 00:36:50,330 --> 00:36:51,330 SAMMY DAVIS, JR. 1420 00:36:51,430 --> 00:36:53,650 AND OF COURSE COLONEL SANDERS -- 1421 00:36:54,389 --> 00:36:56,150 I'D HAVE LEAPT AT THE CHANCE. 1422 00:36:56,210 --> 00:36:58,050 WHICH IS WHY I'M SO VERY GLAD 1423 00:36:58,050 --> 00:36:59,050 THAT THEY ACTUALLY DID. 1424 00:36:59,130 --> 00:37:01,030 BECAUSE IT MEANS I NOW GET TO 1425 00:37:01,030 --> 00:37:02,590 ANNOUNCE THAT I'LL ALSO BE 1426 00:37:02,590 --> 00:37:03,770 APPEARING IN "GENERAL HOSPITAL" 1427 00:37:03,770 --> 00:37:04,690 THIS SUMMER. 1428 00:37:04,690 --> 00:37:07,790 BECAUSE WHAT IS FUNNIER THAN 1429 00:37:07,790 --> 00:37:09,050 BEING IN ONE SOAP OPERA? 1430 00:37:09,550 --> 00:37:10,769 BEING IN TWO. 1431 00:37:11,490 --> 00:37:13,290 YOU CAN SEE ME ON, AND I CAN'T 1432 00:37:13,290 --> 00:37:14,470 BELIEVE I'M SAYING THIS, 1433 00:37:14,850 --> 00:37:16,290 "GENERAL HOSPITAL" ON ABC 1434 00:37:16,290 --> 00:37:17,130 NEXT WEEK. 1435 00:37:17,130 --> 00:37:18,890 AND WHILE I'M NOT GOING TO SPOIL 1436 00:37:18,890 --> 00:37:20,770 ANYTHING, I WILL SHOW YOU 1437 00:37:20,770 --> 00:37:22,070 THIS PICTURE OF MY CHARACTER. 1438 00:37:22,070 --> 00:37:25,830 YES, THAT IS ME SURROUNDED BY 1439 00:37:25,830 --> 00:37:27,870 MEN WITH GUNS AND YES, MY HAIR 1440 00:37:27,870 --> 00:37:29,609 HAS BEEN DIPPED IN AN INK WELL. 1441 00:37:30,650 --> 00:37:32,010 AND IF YOU CANNOT TELL FROM 1442 00:37:32,010 --> 00:37:33,270 MY FACE THERE, I AM ACTING 1443 00:37:33,270 --> 00:37:34,270 REALLY HARD. 1444 00:37:35,750 --> 00:37:37,570 I'M ACTING MY HARDEST, IN FACT. 1445 00:37:37,910 --> 00:37:39,070 I DON'T WANT TO BRAG, BUT THEY 1446 00:37:39,070 --> 00:37:40,450 DID SAY THAT OF ANY GUEST STAR 1447 00:37:40,450 --> 00:37:41,910 THEY'VE EVER HAD, I USED THE 1448 00:37:41,910 --> 00:37:42,910 MOST TAKES. 1449 00:37:43,530 --> 00:37:47,990 NOW IT IS ONLY FAIR I ALSO SHOW 1450 00:37:47,990 --> 00:37:49,410 YOU A PHOTO FROM MY TIME ON 1451 00:37:49,410 --> 00:37:49,990 "DAYS OF OUR LIVES," 1452 00:37:49,990 --> 00:37:51,170 SO BRACE YOURSELVES, BECAUSE 1453 00:37:51,330 --> 00:37:52,330 HERE IT IS! 1454 00:37:52,330 --> 00:37:53,330 YES. 1455 00:37:53,330 --> 00:37:55,250 THAT IS REAL. 1456 00:37:55,390 --> 00:37:56,390 THE PHOTO, THAT IS, 1457 00:37:56,390 --> 00:37:57,450 NOT THE HAIR. 1458 00:37:58,470 --> 00:38:00,610 I LOOK LIKE ELVIS REINCARNATED 1459 00:38:00,610 --> 00:38:01,610 INTO HIS ACCOUNTANT. 1460 00:38:01,710 --> 00:38:03,750 I LOOK LIKE RACHEL MADDOW AFTER 1461 00:38:03,750 --> 00:38:04,750 WITNESSING A MURDER. 1462 00:38:04,990 --> 00:38:07,350 I LOOK LIKE ROGAINE'S WORST-CASE 1463 00:38:07,350 --> 00:38:08,350 SCENARIO. 1464 00:38:08,690 --> 00:38:10,610 WHAT I LOVE MOST ABOUT THAT 1465 00:38:10,610 --> 00:38:12,010 PHOTO IS THAT EVEN THOUGH YOU 1466 00:38:12,010 --> 00:38:13,250 CAN ONLY SEE THE BACK OF THE 1467 00:38:13,250 --> 00:38:14,402 OTHER ACTOR'S NECK, YOU CAN TELL 1468 00:38:14,402 --> 00:38:14,713 HOW MUCH I VISUALLY DON'T BELONG 1469 00:38:14,713 --> 00:38:18,804 ANYWHERE NEAR HIM. 1470 00:38:18,870 --> 00:38:20,590 HIS BACK IS AN L.A. 10, 1471 00:38:20,590 --> 00:38:21,530 AND MY FRONT IS 1472 00:38:21,530 --> 00:38:22,770 A MIDDLE EARTH 3. 1473 00:38:24,010 --> 00:38:26,550 I GENUINELY CAN'T WAIT FOR 1474 00:38:26,550 --> 00:38:27,910 EVERYONE TO SEE WHAT THESE TWO 1475 00:38:27,910 --> 00:38:28,970 SOAPS HAVE DONE -- I'M SO 1476 00:38:29,130 --> 00:38:30,730 GRATEFUL THEY PLAYED ALONG WITH 1477 00:38:30,730 --> 00:38:31,610 US, AND I'M TRULY LOOKING 1478 00:38:31,610 --> 00:38:32,850 FORWARD TO READING ABOUT IT 1479 00:38:32,850 --> 00:38:33,440 AFTERWARDS IN 1480 00:38:33,440 --> 00:38:34,490 "THE DAILY MAIL," WHICH I CAN 1481 00:38:34,490 --> 00:38:35,910 ONLY GUESS WILL WRITE SOMETHING 1482 00:38:35,910 --> 00:38:38,110 LIKE "HBO HOST HITS ROCK BOTTOM 1483 00:38:38,191 --> 00:38:40,571 WITH MULTIPLE SOAP OPERA ROLES 1484 00:38:40,652 --> 00:38:42,416 INSIDERS AND DOCTORS WORRY HE'S 1485 00:38:42,499 --> 00:38:43,647 'NEARING DEATH'." 1486 00:38:43,730 --> 00:38:44,830 WELL, YOU'RE GOING TO BE EATING 1487 00:38:44,830 --> 00:38:46,470 YOUR WORDS, DAILY MAIL, BECAUSE 1488 00:38:46,470 --> 00:38:47,930 DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A DESPERATE 1489 00:38:47,930 --> 00:38:48,930 MAN TO YOU? 1490 00:38:49,570 --> 00:38:50,970 NOT TO ME, IT DOESN'T. 1491 00:38:51,130 --> 00:38:52,130 THAT'S THE FACE OF A MAN 1492 00:38:52,230 --> 00:38:53,970 LIVING HIS FUCKING DREAM! 1493 00:38:54,071 --> 00:38:57,048 I'LL BE ON "GENERAL HOSPITAL" 1494 00:38:57,710 --> 00:38:59,950 JULY 2, 3 AND 6, AND ON 1495 00:38:59,950 --> 00:39:00,789 "DAYS OF OUR LIVES" 1496 00:39:00,789 --> 00:39:02,269 AUGUST 11, 12 AND 14. 1497 00:39:02,269 --> 00:39:03,030 THAT IS OUR SHOW. 1498 00:39:03,030 --> 00:39:04,470 THANK YOU SO MUCH WATCHING! 1499 00:39:04,770 --> 00:39:06,670 WE'LL BE BACK JULY 26TH. 1500 00:39:06,670 --> 00:39:07,670 GOOD NIGHT!