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00:00:02,842 --> 00:00:05,210
Keeping a large family
together has its challenges,
2
00:00:05,211 --> 00:00:07,145
and lately, it seems like
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00:00:07,146 --> 00:00:08,613
everybody's doing their own thing.
4
00:00:08,614 --> 00:00:10,848
Ha-ha! Hey, game night!
5
00:00:10,849 --> 00:00:13,148
I got Cranium and Jenga.
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00:00:16,716 --> 00:00:18,817
I also have Bananagrams.
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Closed doors were not an option
when I was growing up.
8
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I'll put that back when you move out.
9
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But then I won't need it.
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Keep talking.
I'll take this whole room apart.
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When I was growing up, you weren't allowed
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to separate yourself from your family,
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which is why I try to find ways
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to remind my kids that they're a part
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of something greater than themselves.
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Hey, babe.
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Check this out. Look what I got today.
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- Oh, those are so cute.
- Yeah, right?
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00:00:51,621 --> 00:00:53,722
- The kids are gonna hate them.
- But... maybe.
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00:00:54,290 --> 00:00:56,958
But they will hate them together.
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Hey, hey, slow your roll.
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I need to talk to you two.
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Look, I want us to start operating
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more like a team around here.
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Spending more time together,
appreciating each other.
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Dad, are you dying?
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No, fool.
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Look, we're all going to support Jack
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at his baseball game,
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and we're all going to wear these t-shirts
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- to show family unity.
- Oh, that sounds great.
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Except I'm not wearing the shirt
or going to the game.
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Okay.
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What I have to say to that
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is wear the shirt or be grounded.
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Can we take a minute to huddle?
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Okay.
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What I have to say to that
is wear the shirt or eat.
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We're still gonna need that minute.
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sync and correction by solfieri
www.addic7ed.com
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Black-ish - 01x09
Colored Commentary
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2-1...
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Okay, so when it's your turn next,
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00:01:50,177 --> 00:01:52,078
you focus, Jack, okay?
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Focus, J.J.
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I should've eaten this shirt.
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I should've gotten adopted by Madonna.
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I should've peed at home.
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I think they're using
a different brand of hot dog.
50
00:02:02,823 --> 00:02:05,158
I didn't hear the snap.
51
00:02:05,159 --> 00:02:07,293
Did you hear the snap?
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I hear my social status crashing.
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There it goes.
54
00:02:12,299 --> 00:02:15,468
Now batting number 9, Jack Johnson.
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Let's see what this natural athlete
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can do against this smart pitcher.
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What does that mean?
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What are you talking about, hon?
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This announcer...
I don't like what he's saying.
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Run! Run!
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No chance for a play,
not the way this boy runs...
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Like a panther.
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Oh, come on.
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Ladies, that doesn't strike
any of you as odd?
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Natural athlete? Panther?
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That's pretty coded language.
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- Didn't pick that up.
- No? No.
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It's okay. My husband will understand.
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Dre. Hmm?
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Dre, come here. I want to talk to you.
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Nice hit, Jack! Way to go!
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- My genes.
- Yeah.
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- Dre.
- What?
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Did you hear that announcer?
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Not really. I was listening to my hot dog.
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He said some weird stuff about Jack
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that really raised my racial antenna.
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00:03:05,151 --> 00:03:07,653
Oh. Really?
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Your race card, sir.
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Ah, my African-American express.
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I've been waiting
since yesterday to use you.
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Hit me with it. What did I miss?
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Okay, well, he started
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- by saying Jack was a natural athlete.
- Which he is.
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And then he called the other kids smart,
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but he didn't call Jack smart.
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00:03:25,171 --> 00:03:26,672
Well...
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00:03:26,673 --> 00:03:28,674
Dre, and then he said our baby
ran like a panther.
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That's cool. Come on.
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Get to the juicy offensive stuff.
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I got this race card
burning a hole in my pocket.
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Look at him go!
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This kid was born to steal!
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See?!
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What?
96
00:03:41,988 --> 00:03:43,422
That is exactly what I'm talking about.
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00:03:43,423 --> 00:03:44,656
Did you hear that?
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00:03:44,657 --> 00:03:49,061
Bow, he said Jack was born
to steal bases, not TVs.
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00:03:49,062 --> 00:03:52,097
Sadly, I won't be playing
my race card today.
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Very good, sir.
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Will I be seeing you later at chick-fil-a?
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Probably.
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Why are you just standing there?
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00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:01,907
Because you're not gonna have me
going around here
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playing the race card all Willy-Nilly.
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00:04:03,343 --> 00:04:05,377
- I'm not Donald trump.
- Are you serious?
107
00:04:05,378 --> 00:04:07,379
Bow, I think this is
more of a sports thing
108
00:04:07,380 --> 00:04:09,047
and not a race thing.
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We think so, too.
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00:04:10,383 --> 00:04:11,416
Hey.
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00:04:11,417 --> 00:04:13,718
Thank you. Okay.
112
00:04:13,719 --> 00:04:17,355
Dre, you're the Marco Polo of racism.
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00:04:17,356 --> 00:04:19,391
You find racism everywhere.
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00:04:19,392 --> 00:04:22,427
Because racism is everywhere, except here.
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Okay.
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Hey, Jack!
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Run like the cops is on yo ass!
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Whoo!
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- So, that was fun, huh?
- Which part?
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00:04:31,737 --> 00:04:34,639
The part where you threw me under the bus
or the part where you stepped on the gas?
121
00:04:34,640 --> 00:04:37,108
- What?
- You had me looking like a jackass, Dre.
122
00:04:37,109 --> 00:04:39,044
You just left me flapping in the wind
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all flippity flip flap.
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I thought we were team Johnson.
125
00:04:41,681 --> 00:04:43,148
We are, babe, but...
126
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All those moms looking at me
like I was a nut.
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00:04:45,151 --> 00:04:46,851
Well, there were some dads, too.
128
00:04:48,154 --> 00:04:50,021
Why do I blurt?
129
00:04:50,022 --> 00:04:51,523
Even if you thought I was wrong,
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00:04:51,524 --> 00:04:54,592
which I was not,
you should've had my back.
131
00:04:54,593 --> 00:04:56,961
Okay, so, you want me
to act like you're right
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00:04:56,962 --> 00:04:58,930
- even when you're wrong?
- Precisely.
133
00:04:58,931 --> 00:05:00,131
And agree with you when I don't.
134
00:05:00,132 --> 00:05:02,133
Yes. That would be best.
135
00:05:02,134 --> 00:05:03,601
Ah.
136
00:05:03,602 --> 00:05:05,470
Okay.
137
00:05:05,471 --> 00:05:08,439
So, you threw your wife
under the bus, Dre?
138
00:05:08,440 --> 00:05:09,974
That's a bad move.
139
00:05:09,975 --> 00:05:11,643
I did the same thing to Margaret.
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00:05:11,644 --> 00:05:14,012
Broke up our first and third marriages.
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00:05:14,013 --> 00:05:15,213
I liked Margaret.
142
00:05:15,214 --> 00:05:17,315
She was much nicer to me the third time.
143
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Well, not to me.
144
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Look, whatever your differences are,
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00:05:20,052 --> 00:05:22,987
figure it out, because we need
all spouses here tonight
146
00:05:22,988 --> 00:05:23,988
for the museum event.
147
00:05:23,989 --> 00:05:25,089
It's a huge new client.
148
00:05:25,090 --> 00:05:26,791
Damn it! I forgot about that.
149
00:05:26,792 --> 00:05:29,560
Hopefully, I can convince Bow
to go with me.
150
00:05:29,561 --> 00:05:31,562
We need Bow here tonight, okay?
151
00:05:31,563 --> 00:05:33,031
She knows all about art,
152
00:05:33,032 --> 00:05:35,333
and my wife knows nothing about nothing.
153
00:05:35,334 --> 00:05:36,801
That's what you get
154
00:05:36,802 --> 00:05:40,047
when you make small talk
on a Southwest flight.
155
00:05:43,086 --> 00:05:45,910
So, you spent all of yesterday
making me look bad,
156
00:05:45,911 --> 00:05:49,013
and I'm supposed to spend
tonight making you look good?
157
00:05:49,014 --> 00:05:51,382
- Yes, that's what I'm asking.
- Mm-hmm.
158
00:05:51,383 --> 00:05:53,050
Plus, you look so sexy when you talk art.
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00:05:53,051 --> 00:05:54,485
- Dre.
- Hey, mama.
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00:05:54,486 --> 00:05:56,220
Talk some art for me right now, please.
161
00:05:56,221 --> 00:05:57,355
Dre, stop it.
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00:05:57,356 --> 00:05:58,990
- Come on, baby, talk that art to me.
- Stop.
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00:05:58,991 --> 00:06:02,326
You mean like... Cezanne?
164
00:06:03,519 --> 00:06:05,171
What about Cezanne?
165
00:06:05,172 --> 00:06:08,764
Well, he was known
for his very tight brush work.
166
00:06:08,765 --> 00:06:11,768
Damn it, you know I love tight brush work.
167
00:06:11,769 --> 00:06:15,338
He would fill an entire canvas
with his landscape.
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00:06:17,808 --> 00:06:19,442
Don't stop. Don't stop.
169
00:06:19,443 --> 00:06:21,611
- He loved to experiment.
- With what?
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00:06:21,612 --> 00:06:24,047
- Muted colors.
- Ooh!
171
00:06:24,048 --> 00:06:25,214
- Stop it.
- Okay, okay.
172
00:06:25,215 --> 00:06:26,649
Save some for the party.
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00:06:26,650 --> 00:06:29,896
Fine, but you need to tell Zoey and Junior
that they're babysitting tonight.
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00:06:29,897 --> 00:06:31,132
Babysit?!
175
00:06:31,133 --> 00:06:34,557
But mom said Zach and I could wear
costumes to the new Marvel movie.
176
00:06:34,558 --> 00:06:36,659
Yeah, I may not have thought
that one through.
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00:06:36,660 --> 00:06:38,061
Trust me, son, I'm doing you a favor
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00:06:38,062 --> 00:06:39,861
by not letting you do that.
179
00:06:39,862 --> 00:06:41,430
So, we're stuck sitting?
180
00:06:41,431 --> 00:06:44,140
Look, man, sitting is
something you excel at.
181
00:06:44,141 --> 00:06:46,201
This is so not fair.
182
00:06:46,202 --> 00:06:48,636
Not only is it fair, it's by design.
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00:06:48,637 --> 00:06:50,238
Your mother and I waited eight years
184
00:06:50,239 --> 00:06:52,207
after you were born
before having more children
185
00:06:52,208 --> 00:06:54,442
so we could take advantage
of moments like this.
186
00:06:54,443 --> 00:06:56,678
- That's what I call planned parenthood.
- Up top.
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00:06:56,679 --> 00:06:57,979
Yep.
188
00:07:04,920 --> 00:07:09,189
So, I was glad I dragged
my wife out from under the bus.
189
00:07:09,190 --> 00:07:10,624
She was doing great.
190
00:07:10,625 --> 00:07:14,394
Caravaggio's use
of Chiaroscuro is beautiful.
191
00:07:14,395 --> 00:07:18,365
Unlike a Master Barista's
use of cappuccino,
192
00:07:18,366 --> 00:07:20,333
which is delicious.
193
00:07:22,637 --> 00:07:24,771
Coffee makes me poop.
194
00:07:24,772 --> 00:07:25,906
- Oh.
- Mm.
195
00:07:25,907 --> 00:07:27,440
- Okay.
- Okeydoke.
196
00:07:27,441 --> 00:07:28,475
All righty. Okay.
197
00:07:28,476 --> 00:07:30,644
My God. What have I done?
198
00:07:32,680 --> 00:07:34,381
- She's not wrong, though.
- I know.
199
00:07:34,901 --> 00:07:37,369
Don't say anything
'cause she's my best friend,
200
00:07:37,884 --> 00:07:40,252
but she totally talks
behind people's backs.
201
00:07:41,855 --> 00:07:44,223
I want some chunky monkey. I need it.
202
00:07:44,224 --> 00:07:45,658
I'm bored.
203
00:07:45,659 --> 00:07:48,056
I want to be entertained.
204
00:07:48,057 --> 00:07:51,751
Oh, then why don't we play a game?
205
00:07:51,752 --> 00:07:53,815
Follow me.
206
00:07:53,816 --> 00:07:56,579
Stand right there.
207
00:07:56,580 --> 00:07:58,748
Close your eyes.
208
00:08:00,788 --> 00:08:02,609
I'm gonna be an awesome mom.
209
00:08:02,610 --> 00:08:04,876
She should not have children.
210
00:08:04,877 --> 00:08:07,312
Hey, Junior, can we play...
211
00:08:08,447 --> 00:08:10,815
Guess we have to entertain ourselves.
212
00:08:12,351 --> 00:08:14,753
You thinking what I'm thinking?
213
00:08:19,458 --> 00:08:20,658
Okay. Here we go.
214
00:08:20,659 --> 00:08:22,126
Are you crazy?
215
00:08:22,787 --> 00:08:25,155
You can't let them ride
down the stairs like that.
216
00:08:25,547 --> 00:08:27,532
They need helmets.
217
00:08:27,533 --> 00:08:29,801
Whoo!
218
00:08:33,338 --> 00:08:35,686
Okay, let's get one thing straight...
219
00:08:35,687 --> 00:08:37,921
None of this was my fault.
220
00:08:39,643 --> 00:08:42,112
Dre you've been to the museum
since we opened up the new wing, right?
221
00:08:42,113 --> 00:08:44,047
What? I practically live in that wing.
222
00:08:44,048 --> 00:08:45,749
I love wings.
223
00:08:46,216 --> 00:08:49,318
You'll have to come down when we
open our retrospective on Matisse.
224
00:08:49,319 --> 00:08:50,586
Try and stop me.
225
00:08:50,587 --> 00:08:53,423
There are two things I love...
Wings and Matisse.
226
00:08:53,424 --> 00:08:54,991
Oh.
227
00:08:54,992 --> 00:08:58,550
I couldn't help but to overhear you guys are
talking about one of my favorite artists.
228
00:08:58,551 --> 00:08:59,662
He's wonderful.
229
00:08:59,663 --> 00:09:04,716
I recently dragged Dre to one of
his exhibits, and even he got it.
230
00:09:04,717 --> 00:09:05,801
I did. What?
231
00:09:06,738 --> 00:09:08,770
I don't remember going to see Matisse.
232
00:09:08,771 --> 00:09:12,007
I tend to remember doing things
I hate, but she's the expert.
233
00:09:12,008 --> 00:09:15,844
I think that he is one
of the greatest surrealists.
234
00:09:15,845 --> 00:09:18,514
I do, and this idea that what is real
235
00:09:18,515 --> 00:09:21,542
lies right behind what you actually see.
236
00:09:21,543 --> 00:09:25,820
I mean, that's mind blowing, to me.
237
00:09:25,821 --> 00:09:29,490
Why are they looking at her like she
has a big, old booger in her nose?
238
00:09:29,491 --> 00:09:31,491
_
239
00:09:31,492 --> 00:09:33,492
_
240
00:09:33,996 --> 00:09:35,663
Let me Google this real quick.
241
00:09:35,664 --> 00:09:38,833
We did go see some artist
that started with an "M."
242
00:09:38,834 --> 00:09:41,935
M-a, m-a, m... ooh!
243
00:09:41,936 --> 00:09:44,638
Match ups for the New College
Football playoff system.
244
00:09:44,639 --> 00:09:45,606
That's cool.
245
00:09:45,607 --> 00:09:47,441
Damn it, Dre, stay on track.
246
00:09:47,442 --> 00:09:49,209
I actually get uneasy
247
00:09:49,210 --> 00:09:51,879
when I see a man in a suit
with a bowler hat
248
00:09:51,880 --> 00:09:54,982
and there isn't a giant piece
of fruit obscuring his face.
249
00:09:54,983 --> 00:09:57,350
Bowler hat... Magritte.
250
00:09:57,351 --> 00:09:59,219
She's talking about Magritte.
251
00:09:59,220 --> 00:10:00,220
Wrong guy.
252
00:10:00,221 --> 00:10:01,354
I'm gonna tell her.
253
00:10:01,355 --> 00:10:02,756
I can't tell her.
254
00:10:02,757 --> 00:10:04,825
She said not to disagree
with her in public,
255
00:10:04,826 --> 00:10:07,193
but this is different, right? Babe.
256
00:10:07,194 --> 00:10:08,594
Ciao. Ciao.
257
00:10:08,595 --> 00:10:09,962
I hope we get to talk more.
258
00:10:09,963 --> 00:10:11,931
- Hey, babe. Yeah.
- Hey, killing it.
259
00:10:11,932 --> 00:10:13,232
- Okay. Hang on.
- I love it.
260
00:10:13,233 --> 00:10:15,435
Ooh! I love art!
261
00:10:17,171 --> 00:10:19,138
That was amazing.
262
00:10:19,139 --> 00:10:22,308
I was on fire.
263
00:10:22,309 --> 00:10:23,643
No doubt.
264
00:10:23,644 --> 00:10:26,012
I don't think anybody even
noticed that Matisse thing.
265
00:10:26,013 --> 00:10:28,181
- The what?
- Uh, the Matisse thing.
266
00:10:28,182 --> 00:10:30,753
You know, everybody was talking
Matisse, but you were talking Magritte.
267
00:10:30,754 --> 00:10:32,585
Wait, are you... d... no.
268
00:10:32,586 --> 00:10:34,706
- What?!
- Uh-huh.
269
00:10:34,707 --> 00:10:35,855
Dre, get off the phone.
270
00:10:35,856 --> 00:10:38,290
Hey, I did not interrupt
or contradict you.
271
00:10:38,291 --> 00:10:41,605
You're welcome. You killed it, Dre.
272
00:10:41,606 --> 00:10:44,696
You had time to Google it,
and you didn't tell me?
273
00:10:44,697 --> 00:10:48,033
- Dre, I referenced Magritte like 10 times.
- I know!
274
00:10:48,034 --> 00:10:50,168
You know a lot about Magritte.
275
00:10:50,169 --> 00:10:52,037
Are you trying to make me stab you?
276
00:10:52,038 --> 00:10:54,506
Dre, I can't belive you did
that to me again.
277
00:10:54,507 --> 00:10:55,574
Hold up.
278
00:10:55,575 --> 00:10:58,243
Are you saying I threw you under the bus
by not throwing you under the bus?
279
00:10:58,244 --> 00:10:59,411
- Yes!
- What?
280
00:11:02,554 --> 00:11:04,321
I don't understand the rules.
281
00:11:07,347 --> 00:11:09,315
Okay, we've got one shot
to get this right.
282
00:11:09,316 --> 00:11:11,636
Mom and dad can never know what happened.
283
00:11:11,637 --> 00:11:13,786
Okay, team Johnson.
284
00:11:13,787 --> 00:11:17,891
- Go. Just go.
- Look pathetic!
285
00:11:17,892 --> 00:11:21,359
- Oh, my God.
- What...
286
00:11:21,360 --> 00:11:22,393
What happened?
287
00:11:22,394 --> 00:11:23,961
We had a little snafu.
288
00:11:23,962 --> 00:11:25,363
But the important thing
289
00:11:25,364 --> 00:11:27,064
is that Diane is conscious
and breathing on her own.
290
00:11:27,065 --> 00:11:29,967
Oh, my God! Baby, are you okay?
291
00:11:29,968 --> 00:11:32,236
What happened?
292
00:11:32,237 --> 00:11:35,372
Well, after we all ate a bunch
of broccoli... steamed...
293
00:11:35,373 --> 00:11:37,652
We were looking for family fun activities.
294
00:11:37,653 --> 00:11:40,945
Yeah, something that would help us
bond with our younger siblings.
295
00:11:40,946 --> 00:11:43,180
So, we decided
to play project runway, and...
296
00:11:43,181 --> 00:11:44,878
- Mommy?
- Hmm?
297
00:11:44,879 --> 00:11:48,050
I was modeling the shoes
you promise I'll grow into,
298
00:11:48,051 --> 00:11:50,286
- and then I fell down the stairs.
- Oh, my God.
299
00:11:50,287 --> 00:11:52,888
Classic slip and fall,
but she's not gonna sue.
300
00:11:54,891 --> 00:11:57,426
- I don't think.
- Oh, my God.
301
00:11:57,427 --> 00:11:59,195
Sweetheart, I'm so sorry.
302
00:11:59,196 --> 00:12:01,163
This was all my fault.
303
00:12:01,164 --> 00:12:03,999
I should've never bought you those big
shoes for your teeny, little feet.
304
00:12:04,567 --> 00:12:06,134
Things weren't adding up,
305
00:12:06,135 --> 00:12:08,637
and Bow was feeling pretty guilty.
306
00:12:09,405 --> 00:12:11,739
I figured if I could find out the truth,
307
00:12:11,740 --> 00:12:14,142
I could give Bow a clear conscience,
308
00:12:14,143 --> 00:12:17,411
and she could give me a break
for my Matisse screw-up.
309
00:12:17,412 --> 00:12:20,948
So I set out to investigate "CSI" style.
310
00:12:28,624 --> 00:12:30,658
Oh...
311
00:12:46,149 --> 00:12:49,871
It was time to shake some trees
and see what falls out.
312
00:12:50,912 --> 00:12:52,779
Hey! Weak link, wake up.
313
00:12:53,112 --> 00:12:54,447
Is this the big one?
314
00:12:54,448 --> 00:12:56,283
Okay, I've got an earthquake kit
under the bed.
315
00:12:56,284 --> 00:12:57,817
I've got cans of tuna in the closet.
316
00:12:57,818 --> 00:12:59,586
I've got traveler's checks
in my money belt.
317
00:12:59,587 --> 00:13:01,621
- Let's go!
- Hey, hey, hey, sit down.
318
00:13:02,032 --> 00:13:03,599
How did the hole get in the wall?
319
00:13:06,456 --> 00:13:08,724
Just like we told you, dad.
320
00:13:15,100 --> 00:13:16,535
Junior just gave you up,
321
00:13:16,536 --> 00:13:18,403
so you might as well confess now.
322
00:13:18,404 --> 00:13:20,957
If he gave us up, why are you here?
323
00:13:22,709 --> 00:13:24,643
Why are you here?
324
00:13:24,644 --> 00:13:26,245
- It's my room.
- Oh.
325
00:13:26,246 --> 00:13:28,113
Why don't you go holler at your wife?
326
00:13:28,114 --> 00:13:31,049
She's the one who bought
those Mary Jane death traps.
327
00:13:31,050 --> 00:13:34,853
- How...
- She almost killed Diane.
328
00:13:34,854 --> 00:13:35,821
I'm sorry.
329
00:13:39,559 --> 00:13:42,494
I'm watching you.
330
00:13:42,495 --> 00:13:44,796
Mm-hmm.
331
00:13:44,797 --> 00:13:46,465
Mm-hmm.
332
00:13:46,466 --> 00:13:48,867
Mm-hmm.
333
00:13:53,438 --> 00:13:54,806
Okay.
334
00:13:54,807 --> 00:13:57,974
Now that I'm satisfied
your story holds up,
335
00:13:57,975 --> 00:14:01,278
I'm gonna reward myself
with some chunky monkey.
336
00:14:02,914 --> 00:14:04,114
Good night.
337
00:14:11,555 --> 00:14:12,856
Oh.
338
00:14:12,857 --> 00:14:17,193
You know, I totally forgot
that you love chunky monkey.
339
00:14:17,194 --> 00:14:20,429
- Would you like some?
- Yes, I would.
340
00:14:20,430 --> 00:14:21,931
I'm sure you would.
341
00:14:21,932 --> 00:14:23,699
You know what goes
really good with chunky monkey?
342
00:14:23,700 --> 00:14:25,635
What?
343
00:14:25,636 --> 00:14:28,037
- Whipped cream.
- Mmm.
344
00:14:28,038 --> 00:14:29,672
Mmm!
345
00:14:29,673 --> 00:14:31,807
And the truth.
346
00:14:32,475 --> 00:14:35,143
Okay, okay, I'll tell you everything.
347
00:14:35,144 --> 00:14:37,612
Zoey and Junior totally abandoned us,
348
00:14:37,613 --> 00:14:40,716
then Jack threw me in a basket,
then pushed me down the stairs.
349
00:14:40,717 --> 00:14:42,384
- Hmm?
- More whipped cream, please.
350
00:14:46,456 --> 00:14:48,557
- Use a spoon.
- Mnh-mnh.
351
00:14:48,558 --> 00:14:50,859
So, I told Bow what really happened,
352
00:14:50,860 --> 00:14:52,594
and I knew she'd let me off the hook.
353
00:14:53,062 --> 00:14:55,029
So you can stop feeling guilty now.
354
00:14:55,030 --> 00:14:56,598
Gee. Thanks.
355
00:14:56,599 --> 00:14:57,765
Come on.
356
00:14:57,766 --> 00:14:59,434
It wasn't easy
getting this info from the kids.
357
00:14:59,435 --> 00:15:01,069
They closed ranks.
358
00:15:01,636 --> 00:15:03,571
Oh, so they had each other's backs, huh?
359
00:15:03,572 --> 00:15:05,105
They were team Johnson.
360
00:15:05,106 --> 00:15:06,273
- Babe, you know what?
- Huh?
361
00:15:06,274 --> 00:15:07,875
We can learn something from the kids.
362
00:15:07,876 --> 00:15:10,277
No, you could learn something.
363
00:15:10,845 --> 00:15:12,612
I'm good. I...
364
00:15:14,349 --> 00:15:18,452
Yep. My peace offering to
Bow had gone unappreciated.
365
00:15:18,453 --> 00:15:21,521
Time for my next strategy...
A common enemy.
366
00:15:21,522 --> 00:15:23,757
And I knew just the one.
367
00:15:25,059 --> 00:15:26,726
Foul ball!
368
00:15:26,727 --> 00:15:27,828
Foul ball?!
369
00:15:27,829 --> 00:15:28,995
You know, this is it.
370
00:15:28,996 --> 00:15:30,697
I've had enough of this guy.
371
00:15:30,698 --> 00:15:31,932
Dre, he didn't say anything.
372
00:15:32,420 --> 00:15:33,700
What? You didn't hear it?
373
00:15:33,701 --> 00:15:34,767
It was outrageous.
374
00:15:34,768 --> 00:15:37,236
Outrageous!
375
00:15:37,237 --> 00:15:38,271
So... you guys want a blow pop?
376
00:15:38,272 --> 00:15:40,473
Not from you, snitch.
377
00:15:40,474 --> 00:15:42,108
You went against the family.
378
00:15:42,109 --> 00:15:44,143
Your candy is dead to us.
379
00:15:46,313 --> 00:15:47,780
You broke my heart.
380
00:15:47,781 --> 00:15:50,616
And another foul ball.
381
00:15:51,871 --> 00:15:54,220
You and your foul balls.
382
00:15:54,221 --> 00:15:56,355
You know what's foul? Everything you say.
383
00:15:56,356 --> 00:15:58,157
Huh? The things that you say.
384
00:15:58,158 --> 00:16:01,460
Natural athlete,
born to steal, foul balls.
385
00:16:02,028 --> 00:16:03,962
It's offensive, all right?
386
00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:06,331
You've got my wife, Dr. Rainbow Johnson,
387
00:16:06,332 --> 00:16:08,667
all worked up, and she should be.
388
00:16:08,668 --> 00:16:10,602
She could not be more right
389
00:16:10,603 --> 00:16:12,170
about the offensive
and inappropriate things
390
00:16:12,171 --> 00:16:13,305
you say about those children.
391
00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:14,739
I'm surprised one of these kids
392
00:16:14,740 --> 00:16:16,341
ain't come up here and kicked your ass.
393
00:16:19,512 --> 00:16:22,414
I really don't know
what you're talking about.
394
00:16:22,415 --> 00:16:23,648
Of course you don't.
395
00:16:24,016 --> 00:16:25,984
Ignorant people never do.
396
00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:28,386
So, I'm shutting you down right now.
397
00:16:30,164 --> 00:16:32,066
I'm sorry.
398
00:16:32,067 --> 00:16:33,891
I didn't mean none of that stuff
I just said.
399
00:16:33,892 --> 00:16:36,160
I had to make it at least appear
400
00:16:36,161 --> 00:16:37,628
that I was setting you straight
for my wife.
401
00:16:37,629 --> 00:16:39,596
You know, she can be
a little cuckoo sometimes.
402
00:16:39,597 --> 00:16:41,932
- You understand, right?
- I do.
403
00:16:41,933 --> 00:16:43,734
But what I don't understand
404
00:16:43,735 --> 00:16:45,769
is why you turned off the scoreboard.
405
00:16:45,770 --> 00:16:48,072
No, no, no, I turned off the microphone.
406
00:16:48,073 --> 00:16:49,106
No.
407
00:16:49,107 --> 00:16:50,674
Scoreboard.
408
00:16:55,413 --> 00:16:56,547
Hmm?
409
00:16:58,249 --> 00:16:59,983
Uh...
410
00:17:01,700 --> 00:17:03,519
Batting seventh,
411
00:17:03,520 --> 00:17:06,789
Aiden Schulman.
412
00:17:09,626 --> 00:17:11,194
It's cool.
413
00:17:15,248 --> 00:17:19,817
The plan to keep team Johnson together
had pretty much been reduced to ashes.
414
00:17:19,818 --> 00:17:22,954
The kids were mad at each
other, and Bow was mad at me.
415
00:17:23,451 --> 00:17:25,119
Hey. Can we talk?
416
00:17:26,222 --> 00:17:27,591
Uh, that's okay.
417
00:17:27,592 --> 00:17:29,960
- I pretty much know what you would say.
- Really?
418
00:17:29,961 --> 00:17:32,796
'Cause there's a lot of profanity
just behind my eyes.
419
00:17:32,797 --> 00:17:34,965
- Mm-hmm.
- Maybe after dinner.
420
00:17:36,268 --> 00:17:38,202
Eh.
421
00:17:38,203 --> 00:17:40,471
I'm gonna eat later.
422
00:17:42,206 --> 00:17:43,440
I'm gonna eat in my room.
423
00:17:43,441 --> 00:17:45,442
I don't want to eat ale with the snitch.
424
00:17:45,443 --> 00:17:47,277
I'm going outside.
425
00:17:47,278 --> 00:17:49,145
Hey! Hey, that's enough!
426
00:17:49,146 --> 00:17:51,247
Family meeting, living room, now!
427
00:17:53,584 --> 00:17:55,084
Really?
428
00:17:55,752 --> 00:17:57,119
Just me and you?
429
00:17:57,120 --> 00:17:58,287
This is ridiculous.
430
00:17:58,288 --> 00:17:59,722
I don't disagree.
431
00:17:59,723 --> 00:18:00,923
Why didn't anyone else show up?
432
00:18:00,924 --> 00:18:03,058
Maybe they don't respect you like I do.
433
00:18:03,418 --> 00:18:04,559
I guess not.
434
00:18:04,560 --> 00:18:06,461
Seems like the only thing left to do
435
00:18:06,462 --> 00:18:08,363
is have some ice cream.
436
00:18:10,965 --> 00:18:12,332
Hold on to that thought.
437
00:18:14,502 --> 00:18:15,904
Ah.
438
00:18:15,905 --> 00:18:17,672
- Hey, what's going on?
- Hey, Dre.
439
00:18:17,673 --> 00:18:19,908
Sorry to bother you at home,
but I thought it was better
440
00:18:19,909 --> 00:18:22,243
than sending out one
of those crappy team e-mails.
441
00:18:22,244 --> 00:18:24,412
- Cool. I don't read those, anyway.
- No one does.
442
00:18:25,045 --> 00:18:26,680
I take a lot of time to craft my e-mails.
443
00:18:26,681 --> 00:18:29,784
We're here about the loudspeaker incident.
444
00:18:29,785 --> 00:18:31,886
- It was an incident?
- Yeah.
445
00:18:31,887 --> 00:18:33,821
Yeah, we have some very upset parents.
446
00:18:33,822 --> 00:18:36,991
In all my years, it's the worst
behavior the league has ever seen.
447
00:18:36,992 --> 00:18:38,459
Worse than that old streaker
448
00:18:38,460 --> 00:18:40,794
that wandered into the middle
of a tee-ball game?
449
00:18:40,795 --> 00:18:43,263
Jeremy's grandfather has dementia.
450
00:18:43,264 --> 00:18:45,532
Uh... okay.
451
00:18:45,533 --> 00:18:49,002
So, we're gonna have to ask you to stay
away from the complex for two weeks.
452
00:18:49,003 --> 00:18:51,404
And we've asked Jeremy's
grandfather to do the same.
453
00:18:51,405 --> 00:18:52,539
Repeatedly.
454
00:18:52,540 --> 00:18:54,240
You're banning him from the complex?
455
00:18:54,241 --> 00:18:55,208
Are you serious?
456
00:18:55,576 --> 00:18:58,745
He was naked in front of children.
457
00:18:58,746 --> 00:18:59,946
No. My husband.
458
00:18:59,947 --> 00:19:01,547
Bow, we got to do something.
459
00:19:01,548 --> 00:19:05,284
And I'm sure even Dre would admit
that he acted like an idiot.
460
00:19:05,285 --> 00:19:07,754
- Would, Dre?
- No, no, Dre would not,
461
00:19:07,755 --> 00:19:09,255
because he is not an idiot.
462
00:19:09,823 --> 00:19:11,323
People get carried away
463
00:19:11,324 --> 00:19:13,058
at that stupid field all the time.
464
00:19:13,059 --> 00:19:14,927
This man cares about his family,
and he made a mistake.
465
00:19:15,295 --> 00:19:16,929
So, if you're gonna ban a Johnson,
466
00:19:16,930 --> 00:19:20,232
you're banning all of us,
and that includes Jack, yeah.
467
00:19:20,233 --> 00:19:21,900
And you know that boy runs like a panther.
468
00:19:21,901 --> 00:19:23,835
- Yes.
- Very fleet footed.
469
00:19:23,836 --> 00:19:25,437
- Good night to both of you.
- Okay.
470
00:19:25,438 --> 00:19:27,139
- Yes, good night.
- Good night. Yes.
471
00:19:27,140 --> 00:19:29,133
- We will see you in a couple of weeks.
- Thank you.
472
00:19:29,134 --> 00:19:30,401
- That's ridiculous.
- Wow.
473
00:19:30,876 --> 00:19:33,712
Hey, babe, did you really mean that?
474
00:19:33,713 --> 00:19:35,246
- No. You're an idiot.
- Oh.
475
00:19:35,247 --> 00:19:37,282
But I would never tell them that.
476
00:19:37,283 --> 00:19:39,884
That is called having someone's back.
477
00:19:40,352 --> 00:19:41,853
You're right, and I'm sorry.
478
00:19:41,854 --> 00:19:44,889
But I wasn't kidding when I said
I didn't understand your rules.
479
00:19:44,890 --> 00:19:46,090
They're really hard.
480
00:19:46,091 --> 00:19:48,192
Just show me that you're there for me,
481
00:19:48,193 --> 00:19:50,862
and never let me embarrass myself.
482
00:19:50,863 --> 00:19:51,896
Cool.
483
00:19:52,926 --> 00:19:54,298
But what about karaoke?
484
00:19:54,299 --> 00:19:56,067
What about karaoke?
485
00:19:57,059 --> 00:19:58,902
I really don't understand these rules.
486
00:19:58,903 --> 00:20:01,038
What about karaoke?
487
00:20:01,039 --> 00:20:02,573
I... okay.
488
00:20:02,574 --> 00:20:05,976
I mean... I'm amazing at karaoke.
489
00:20:05,977 --> 00:20:08,579
See what mom just did, Diane?
490
00:20:08,580 --> 00:20:10,147
That's what loyalty looks like.
491
00:20:10,615 --> 00:20:12,048
I'm sorry, okay?
492
00:20:12,049 --> 00:20:13,650
Daddy had chunky monkey.
493
00:20:13,651 --> 00:20:15,285
I would've broken for ice cream.
494
00:20:15,286 --> 00:20:16,887
I forgive you.
495
00:20:16,888 --> 00:20:20,390
Well, I guess you're only 7,
so I forgive you, too.
496
00:20:20,391 --> 00:20:22,025
What about you, Junior?
497
00:20:22,593 --> 00:20:24,127
He offered you ice cream?
498
00:20:24,128 --> 00:20:28,464
Dad gripped me up out of bed
and shined a light in my eyes.
499
00:20:28,465 --> 00:20:30,500
What?
500
00:20:32,469 --> 00:20:35,071
So, there were a few bumps along the way,
501
00:20:35,072 --> 00:20:38,408
but in the end, team Johnson
came together for the win.
502
00:20:38,409 --> 00:20:40,843
One way or another,
we had each other's backs.
503
00:20:40,844 --> 00:20:42,712
Little do they know,
504
00:20:42,713 --> 00:20:45,515
I'll be kicking their butts
in Bananagrams later.
505
00:20:58,309 --> 00:21:01,664
Yeah! Yay, mommy!
506
00:21:01,665 --> 00:21:02,874
- Mommy! Whoo!
- Wonderful.
507
00:21:02,875 --> 00:21:04,776
Thank you so much.
You want me to do another one?
508
00:21:04,777 --> 00:21:06,978
Uh, do you want to do another one?
509
00:21:06,979 --> 00:21:09,548
Only if you want me to do another one.
510
00:21:09,549 --> 00:21:11,583
I want what you want, baby.
511
00:21:11,893 --> 00:21:14,194
Okay, yes or no, I'm embarrassing myself?
512
00:21:16,784 --> 00:21:20,270
I really, really don't
understand the rules.
513
00:21:20,271 --> 00:21:22,606
That's a no! I'm doing another one.
Return to menu.
514
00:21:25,935 --> 00:21:27,935
sync and correction by solfieri
www.addic7ed.com