1 00:00:00,847 --> 00:00:03,724 The word "nepotism" is defined as... 2 00:00:03,734 --> 00:00:06,803 _ 3 00:00:06,909 --> 00:00:09,130 _ 4 00:00:09,140 --> 00:00:12,265 The term originated when Catholic popes and bishops 5 00:00:12,275 --> 00:00:13,541 used to give their nephews 6 00:00:13,643 --> 00:00:15,543 important positions in the church. 7 00:00:15,645 --> 00:00:18,512 Get it... Ephew", "nepotism"? 8 00:00:19,682 --> 00:00:20,814 Nepotism is what 9 00:00:20,883 --> 00:00:22,516 this country was built on... 10 00:00:22,618 --> 00:00:25,953 In politics, sports, entertainment, 11 00:00:26,088 --> 00:00:28,822 and even the manufacturing of affordable duck calls. 12 00:00:29,957 --> 00:00:32,426 But if you're not lucky enough to be hooked up like that, 13 00:00:32,528 --> 00:00:34,628 you have to do it all on your own, 14 00:00:34,730 --> 00:00:36,263 which can be tough. 15 00:00:37,233 --> 00:00:39,133 So I learned to work twice as hard 16 00:00:39,235 --> 00:00:41,168 to get what some of those nepotized people 17 00:00:41,270 --> 00:00:42,670 had given to them. 18 00:00:43,253 --> 00:00:47,341 And eventually, the hard work I did paid off. 19 00:00:47,443 --> 00:00:49,743 So I appreciate everything I got 20 00:00:49,845 --> 00:00:52,479 because I know I earned it. 21 00:00:52,548 --> 00:00:56,817 It built my character, and I want that for my kids, 22 00:00:56,919 --> 00:01:00,321 which is why they won't be using my connections 23 00:01:00,389 --> 00:01:01,889 to get any shortcuts in life. 24 00:01:01,991 --> 00:01:03,691 - Oh! Dre, thank God you're here. - Mm-hmm? 25 00:01:03,793 --> 00:01:05,492 If Zoey is ever gonna get into college, 26 00:01:05,561 --> 00:01:07,461 she is gonna need you to use your connections 27 00:01:07,563 --> 00:01:09,396 to hook her up with an internship. 28 00:01:09,498 --> 00:01:10,598 What? 29 00:01:10,666 --> 00:01:15,138 Synced and corrected by johnyd13 ~ www.addic7ed.com ~ 30 00:01:15,705 --> 00:01:17,938 Zoey waited too long to find a college internship, 31 00:01:18,007 --> 00:01:20,474 and the only way she's gonna get one is if you help her. 32 00:01:20,576 --> 00:01:21,575 What? 33 00:01:21,644 --> 00:01:23,444 Well, why didn't she ask me for my help? 34 00:01:23,542 --> 00:01:24,545 I was gonna text you about it. 35 00:01:24,645 --> 00:01:26,146 I just got caught up with something. 36 00:01:26,248 --> 00:01:27,314 Uh, Dad, uh... can you help me 37 00:01:27,416 --> 00:01:28,916 with that thing Mom's talking about? 38 00:01:29,018 --> 00:01:30,117 - Look at her, Bow. - Mm-hmm. 39 00:01:30,186 --> 00:01:32,052 She expects everything to be handed to her 40 00:01:32,154 --> 00:01:33,354 on a silver platter. 41 00:01:33,456 --> 00:01:34,488 But if she wants something, 42 00:01:34,557 --> 00:01:36,757 she's gonna have to go after it on her own. 43 00:01:36,826 --> 00:01:38,025 Just like I did, Dad. 44 00:01:38,127 --> 00:01:41,028 I wanted a job, so I went and got one. 45 00:01:41,038 --> 00:01:41,854 Nice! 46 00:01:41,864 --> 00:01:44,264 You're now looking at the newest team member 47 00:01:44,367 --> 00:01:45,899 - of Pizza Possum. - Huh. 48 00:01:46,002 --> 00:01:47,434 The premier kids' arcade, 49 00:01:47,536 --> 00:01:49,737 playland, and possum-themed eatery. 50 00:01:49,805 --> 00:01:51,438 Junior, what does this have to do 51 00:01:51,507 --> 00:01:53,240 with what we're talking about, hmm? 52 00:01:53,309 --> 00:01:56,610 Uh, everything? I segued into it. 53 00:01:56,712 --> 00:01:59,346 I even used some of the same words you use. 54 00:01:59,415 --> 00:02:01,081 Don't pay him any attention. 55 00:02:01,183 --> 00:02:02,549 That is wonderful that you got a job. 56 00:02:02,652 --> 00:02:04,051 - I'm proud. - Thanks, Mom. 57 00:02:04,153 --> 00:02:06,353 Hey, Zoey, I can pull some strings 58 00:02:06,455 --> 00:02:09,123 and get you an internship down at The Possum. 59 00:02:09,225 --> 00:02:12,693 I would not even want to own that place. 60 00:02:12,795 --> 00:02:15,996 See? No work ethic. Complete bum. 61 00:02:16,065 --> 00:02:17,865 Well, Dre, she needs something that looks good 62 00:02:17,933 --> 00:02:19,900 on her college application, and quick. 63 00:02:20,002 --> 00:02:22,569 Uh, I feel like we got off of my thing too fast. 64 00:02:22,672 --> 00:02:23,904 Okay, Junior, enough, all right? 65 00:02:23,973 --> 00:02:26,040 We get it. You have a job that nobody wants. 66 00:02:26,142 --> 00:02:27,875 Hey, look here. You're a big shot. 67 00:02:27,977 --> 00:02:30,077 Why can't you get her an internship at the hospital? 68 00:02:30,179 --> 00:02:31,679 You don't think I tried? 69 00:02:31,781 --> 00:02:35,249 Yeah, if you could just give her something really small, 70 00:02:35,317 --> 00:02:36,316 I'd really appreciate it. 71 00:02:36,419 --> 00:02:37,518 I'm sorry. Who are you? 72 00:02:37,620 --> 00:02:39,353 R... Uh, Rainbow Johnson. 73 00:02:39,422 --> 00:02:42,656 We've done like 300 surgeries together? 74 00:02:42,758 --> 00:02:44,224 I saved your mother's life! 75 00:02:44,293 --> 00:02:46,860 Hmm. Seems like I'd remember that. 76 00:02:48,230 --> 00:02:49,797 Dre, you have so many connections. 77 00:02:49,899 --> 00:02:51,498 Why won't you use them to help her? 78 00:02:51,600 --> 00:02:53,834 Because they are my connections. 79 00:02:53,936 --> 00:02:56,537 I had to hustle hard to get my hookups. 80 00:02:56,639 --> 00:02:59,039 All for Dad, none for you. 81 00:02:59,141 --> 00:03:00,708 Got it? Good. 82 00:03:01,875 --> 00:03:02,710 Let's roll. 83 00:03:02,812 --> 00:03:04,912 You don't even like red Gatorade. 84 00:03:05,014 --> 00:03:06,180 I don't need to like it. 85 00:03:06,282 --> 00:03:09,383 I got hooked up because I am a trendsetter, 86 00:03:09,485 --> 00:03:11,218 a taste maker... 87 00:03:11,320 --> 00:03:12,553 and a hustler. 88 00:03:12,621 --> 00:03:14,922 Dre, you got hooked up 89 00:03:15,024 --> 00:03:17,958 because you got rear-ended by a manager from BevMo. 90 00:03:17,993 --> 00:03:20,894 All I'm saying is that if Zoey wants an internship, 91 00:03:20,963 --> 00:03:24,064 she's gonna have to put in the work and get it herself. 92 00:03:24,100 --> 00:03:25,860 Let her get her own Gatorade like I got mine. 93 00:03:27,703 --> 00:03:28,769 Mm. 94 00:03:28,871 --> 00:03:30,471 Ugh! 95 00:03:30,506 --> 00:03:32,406 Should have taken the money. 96 00:03:32,508 --> 00:03:34,141 They offered you money?! 97 00:03:34,210 --> 00:03:36,477 You've been at Pizza Possum for two days. 98 00:03:36,512 --> 00:03:38,679 Why haven't you hooked us up with prize tickets? 99 00:03:38,781 --> 00:03:39,847 We have 20. 100 00:03:39,882 --> 00:03:41,582 We're gonna need about 500,000 more 101 00:03:41,684 --> 00:03:43,183 if we want to get a lava lamp. 102 00:03:43,285 --> 00:03:45,052 I want something sophisticated, 103 00:03:45,121 --> 00:03:47,688 like a hamburger phone or brass knuckles. 104 00:03:47,757 --> 00:03:50,290 I can't be giving out favors willy-nilly. 105 00:03:50,359 --> 00:03:52,226 I'm a valued employee. 106 00:03:52,328 --> 00:03:55,095 They don't just give this to anybody with a vest. 107 00:03:55,131 --> 00:03:58,031 Here, this opens all the token machines and arcade games. 108 00:03:58,100 --> 00:04:00,234 I'll guard it with my life, sir. 109 00:04:00,302 --> 00:04:01,201 Whatever. 110 00:04:01,303 --> 00:04:02,836 If you lose it, use your fingernail. 111 00:04:02,938 --> 00:04:04,972 Give me the key! I want the power. 112 00:04:05,007 --> 00:04:07,141 Sorry, guys, but I can't help you. 113 00:04:07,243 --> 00:04:09,343 He's right. He can't help you. 114 00:04:09,445 --> 00:04:12,513 He's got a new family now... Corporate America. 115 00:04:12,581 --> 00:04:15,649 His mother is capitalism. His father is greed. 116 00:04:15,751 --> 00:04:17,384 - His sister is the bott... - Okay, stop! 117 00:04:17,453 --> 00:04:19,386 Just stop. We get it. 118 00:04:19,421 --> 00:04:22,456 Do not listen to him. I am very proud of you, okay? 119 00:04:22,525 --> 00:04:25,926 Remember, Junior, you are more than just an ill-fitting vest. 120 00:04:25,995 --> 00:04:27,027 Ill-fitting? 121 00:04:27,062 --> 00:04:28,529 You cannot possibly think this looks good. 122 00:04:28,597 --> 00:04:29,530 What is that, burlap? 123 00:04:29,632 --> 00:04:31,765 It looks great. You're great. 124 00:04:31,834 --> 00:04:34,334 So don't listen to anything people are gonna say about you. 125 00:04:34,436 --> 00:04:35,736 Just ignore everybody out there 126 00:04:35,838 --> 00:04:37,471 who's gonna call you "Pizza Nerd," 127 00:04:37,573 --> 00:04:39,873 "Name-Tag Boy," "Dummy." 128 00:04:39,942 --> 00:04:41,041 Who's calling me that? 129 00:04:41,076 --> 00:04:43,043 And people might be cruel about the way 130 00:04:43,112 --> 00:04:45,279 your mouth hangs open when you're listening. 131 00:04:45,347 --> 00:04:47,881 Ignore those people. 132 00:04:47,950 --> 00:04:49,783 Hold on. Who is saying this stuff? 133 00:04:49,852 --> 00:04:51,185 People. 134 00:04:51,287 --> 00:04:53,153 Thanks, but I think I'll be fine. 135 00:04:53,255 --> 00:04:54,288 Okay. 136 00:04:54,390 --> 00:04:55,789 I've got a job to do. 137 00:04:55,891 --> 00:04:56,924 Oh, boy. 138 00:05:00,062 --> 00:05:02,062 You're "people," aren't you? 139 00:05:02,131 --> 00:05:04,298 It's Mommy's job to be "people." 140 00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:05,999 To be honest, I was annoyed 141 00:05:06,035 --> 00:05:07,968 that Bow would even ask me to help Zoey. 142 00:05:08,037 --> 00:05:10,103 I didn't use nepotism to get to where I am. 143 00:05:10,172 --> 00:05:11,138 Why should my kids? 144 00:05:11,173 --> 00:05:12,472 You're right, Dre. 145 00:05:12,541 --> 00:05:14,208 Nepotism is disgusting. 146 00:05:14,276 --> 00:05:16,777 I mean, whatever happened to good, old-fashioned 147 00:05:16,812 --> 00:05:18,178 strong work ethic. 148 00:05:18,280 --> 00:05:19,313 - Exactly. - Mm-hmm. 149 00:05:19,415 --> 00:05:21,048 Take my little Connie... 150 00:05:21,083 --> 00:05:23,383 Now, he's not just gonna have the CEO position handed to him. 151 00:05:23,485 --> 00:05:24,585 Damn straight. 152 00:05:24,620 --> 00:05:27,054 But... I am definitely gonna be CEO. 153 00:05:27,122 --> 00:05:28,455 Of course. You're my son. 154 00:05:28,524 --> 00:05:30,090 But you are gonna have to work your way up 155 00:05:30,125 --> 00:05:31,258 from Senior Vice President. 156 00:05:31,327 --> 00:05:34,394 Hold up. I worked here 10 years before I became SVP. 157 00:05:34,496 --> 00:05:35,529 He's SVP? 158 00:05:35,598 --> 00:05:37,231 Just of the urban stuff, sweetheart. 159 00:05:37,333 --> 00:05:38,332 I want that, too. 160 00:05:38,434 --> 00:05:40,100 Mm... no, you don't. 161 00:05:40,202 --> 00:05:41,535 I only used nepotism once... 162 00:05:41,637 --> 00:05:42,970 To make out with my cousin. 163 00:05:43,038 --> 00:05:45,272 No, Josh, that's incest. 164 00:05:45,341 --> 00:05:46,406 No, it's not. 165 00:05:46,475 --> 00:05:47,641 We were on Martha's Vineyard, 166 00:05:47,743 --> 00:05:48,909 and she was getting divorced. 167 00:05:48,978 --> 00:05:49,977 Disgusting. 168 00:05:50,045 --> 00:05:50,944 I feel ya, Dre. 169 00:05:51,013 --> 00:05:52,679 I went from working at Pan Am 170 00:05:52,781 --> 00:05:54,681 to slinging burgers at a drive-in. 171 00:05:54,750 --> 00:05:56,483 Roller-skated up to Janis Joplin. 172 00:05:56,552 --> 00:05:58,518 She asked me to hold the onions. 173 00:05:58,587 --> 00:06:00,787 Man, I put a gang of onions on there. 174 00:06:00,823 --> 00:06:03,357 Trying to tell me what to do. 175 00:06:03,392 --> 00:06:06,693 Pan Am and Janis Joplin... Charlie, how old are you? 176 00:06:06,795 --> 00:06:08,328 Between 39 and 72. 177 00:06:08,430 --> 00:06:09,763 What? I wasn't allowed 178 00:06:09,865 --> 00:06:11,465 to see my birth certificate... 179 00:06:11,567 --> 00:06:14,067 Something about my father not wanting me to know who he was. 180 00:06:14,136 --> 00:06:15,502 But the most important thing is 181 00:06:15,571 --> 00:06:19,006 I became something... Junior Account Manager. 182 00:06:19,074 --> 00:06:21,241 I work hard for everything that I got... 183 00:06:21,310 --> 00:06:24,411 My Buick LeSabre, my book of CDs, my TV. 184 00:06:24,513 --> 00:06:26,580 Well, almost my TV... 185 00:06:26,649 --> 00:06:28,749 Only 30 more payments to the rental place. 186 00:06:32,488 --> 00:06:35,889 But at least I can say I don't owe anyone anything. 187 00:06:35,991 --> 00:06:36,857 Except your ex-wife. 188 00:06:36,959 --> 00:06:37,791 And the government. 189 00:06:37,893 --> 00:06:38,692 And that rental place. 190 00:06:38,761 --> 00:06:40,294 And me for lunch yesterday. 191 00:06:40,396 --> 00:06:41,828 Damn. 192 00:06:41,931 --> 00:06:43,297 I owe a lot of people. 193 00:06:43,399 --> 00:06:45,465 Dre, when I die, buy me a headstone, all right? 194 00:06:45,534 --> 00:06:48,035 Don't... Don't let them bury me in the field. 195 00:06:48,070 --> 00:06:50,671 Field funerals aren't fun... Too many flies. 196 00:06:50,706 --> 00:06:52,172 And then it hit me... 197 00:06:52,241 --> 00:06:55,142 All the white guys at work had gotten ahead using nepotism, 198 00:06:55,244 --> 00:06:58,779 while Charlie is still paying off a $17.000 television. 199 00:06:58,847 --> 00:07:02,316 I couldn't let that happen to Zoey. 200 00:07:02,384 --> 00:07:04,151 Before you ask, yes, 201 00:07:04,253 --> 00:07:05,719 my knitting club is making little bags 202 00:07:05,788 --> 00:07:07,054 to cover broken parking meters, 203 00:07:07,156 --> 00:07:08,488 and, yes, it was my idea. 204 00:07:08,590 --> 00:07:09,790 What's wrong with you? 205 00:07:09,892 --> 00:07:11,091 I went to work, 206 00:07:11,160 --> 00:07:13,393 brought love and light to kids, 207 00:07:13,495 --> 00:07:15,829 then I saw some things... 208 00:07:15,898 --> 00:07:18,432 Things I can never unsee. 209 00:07:19,501 --> 00:07:22,102 Hey, hey! You don't dump old fries. 210 00:07:22,204 --> 00:07:23,370 You marry them. 211 00:07:23,472 --> 00:07:25,105 But the customer licked the salt off 212 00:07:25,174 --> 00:07:26,606 and put them back on their plate. 213 00:07:26,709 --> 00:07:27,941 Then they're low in sodium. 214 00:07:28,043 --> 00:07:29,476 We're doing God's work. 215 00:07:29,578 --> 00:07:30,978 And that's not even the worst of it. 216 00:07:31,080 --> 00:07:33,480 You know Pizza Possum's best-selling food item, 217 00:07:33,549 --> 00:07:34,781 the Possum Blossom? 218 00:07:34,883 --> 00:07:37,351 You assume it's just a whimsical name. 219 00:07:37,453 --> 00:07:39,386 It is not. 220 00:07:39,421 --> 00:07:42,022 Corporate America... Anything to cut a corner. 221 00:07:42,124 --> 00:07:43,924 I'm going to shower. I feel dirty. 222 00:07:43,993 --> 00:07:46,026 Ain't a loofah big enough to wash your conscience. 223 00:07:46,128 --> 00:07:48,161 Oh, hey, Junior. 224 00:07:48,230 --> 00:07:49,563 How's it going down at the P.P.? 225 00:07:49,665 --> 00:07:51,064 Did you have to use that fancy key? 226 00:07:51,166 --> 00:07:52,532 Did you play in the ball pit? 227 00:07:54,837 --> 00:07:56,770 Yep! All of that! 228 00:07:56,872 --> 00:07:58,505 Best job ever! 229 00:07:58,607 --> 00:07:59,639 Awesome! 230 00:07:59,742 --> 00:08:01,842 Now go do your homework, and whatever you do, 231 00:08:01,944 --> 00:08:04,811 don't look up their Yelp reviews. 232 00:08:04,913 --> 00:08:06,179 Yay! 233 00:08:08,083 --> 00:08:09,583 They're so innocent. 234 00:08:09,651 --> 00:08:11,551 They'd never understand the truth. 235 00:08:11,620 --> 00:08:13,320 But you do. 236 00:08:13,422 --> 00:08:14,654 You do. 237 00:08:16,725 --> 00:08:20,060 Zoey, I have the greatest news. 238 00:08:20,162 --> 00:08:22,229 Is it that you didn't go out in that romper? 239 00:08:22,331 --> 00:08:25,298 That's definitely not it. Ask anyone at my school. 240 00:08:25,367 --> 00:08:28,402 Okay, what I was saying is that... Mm-hmm. 241 00:08:28,504 --> 00:08:31,838 I got you an internship at the hospital! 242 00:08:31,940 --> 00:08:33,140 Oh! I mean, I had to give up my parking space, 243 00:08:33,208 --> 00:08:34,408 but I was, like, one patient death away 244 00:08:34,510 --> 00:08:35,709 from losing it anyway, so... 245 00:08:35,811 --> 00:08:38,003 - You're amazing! Thanks, Mom! - Ahh! Yay! 246 00:08:38,013 --> 00:08:39,413 Hey, everybody. 247 00:08:39,515 --> 00:08:41,081 I have some great news. 248 00:08:41,150 --> 00:08:43,550 What, that you didn't wear those shoes all day long? 249 00:08:45,220 --> 00:08:47,287 Mom, that's mean. 250 00:08:47,389 --> 00:08:49,089 - No, I... - That's a shame. 251 00:08:49,158 --> 00:08:51,425 I pulled some strings with a client, 252 00:08:51,527 --> 00:08:53,894 and I got Zoey a fellowship 253 00:08:53,996 --> 00:08:55,929 at Teen Vogue. Oh. 254 00:08:55,998 --> 00:08:58,265 - Oh, my God! - Wh... Hey! 255 00:08:58,367 --> 00:09:00,467 S-Sorry, Mom. It's Teen Vogue. 256 00:09:00,536 --> 00:09:03,336 I was gonna find a way out of your gross internship anyway. 257 00:09:03,405 --> 00:09:04,704 Hey, mine's gross, too, all right? 258 00:09:04,773 --> 00:09:06,073 You're starting in the mailroom... 259 00:09:06,175 --> 00:09:07,340 Rock bottom. 260 00:09:07,443 --> 00:09:09,476 Still better than the top of the hospital. 261 00:09:09,578 --> 00:09:11,812 Ahh! Mm, there you go! 262 00:09:11,914 --> 00:09:13,814 Bye. 263 00:09:13,916 --> 00:09:15,315 Oh. 264 00:09:15,417 --> 00:09:17,384 Did, um... Did you go out in that? 265 00:09:17,486 --> 00:09:19,953 - Yes, I did. - Hmm. 266 00:09:20,904 --> 00:09:22,925 - Wha... - Okay. 267 00:09:23,266 --> 00:09:24,261 I thought about it, 268 00:09:24,330 --> 00:09:26,202 and everyone else has been using nepotism, 269 00:09:26,212 --> 00:09:28,578 and this is our first time that we're in a position to use it. 270 00:09:28,588 --> 00:09:30,073 So you should be happy, 271 00:09:30,083 --> 00:09:33,017 because, thanks to me, Zoey will never be 272 00:09:33,086 --> 00:09:36,187 a 72-year-old Junior Account Manager 273 00:09:36,256 --> 00:09:38,990 who will be buried in a field like Charlie. 274 00:09:39,092 --> 00:09:41,492 Wait, Dre. 72? 275 00:09:51,671 --> 00:09:52,637 Wow. 276 00:09:52,705 --> 00:09:54,739 Yeah, he'll still never live long enough 277 00:09:54,774 --> 00:09:56,307 - to pay for that TV. - Hmm. 278 00:09:56,376 --> 00:09:58,743 I couldn't wait to bring Zoey over to Teen Vogue. 279 00:09:58,812 --> 00:10:00,878 They love me there because of all the great work 280 00:10:00,980 --> 00:10:02,146 I've done for them. 281 00:10:02,248 --> 00:10:03,548 - Dre! - Oh! 282 00:10:03,650 --> 00:10:04,916 There he is... 283 00:10:04,984 --> 00:10:07,218 The man who talked us out of our Paul Giamatti cover. 284 00:10:07,320 --> 00:10:09,620 I don't know how that got so much traction. 285 00:10:09,722 --> 00:10:11,255 Ooh, what were you thinking? 286 00:10:11,324 --> 00:10:14,258 - But, Neil, this is my princess Zoey. - Aww! 287 00:10:14,327 --> 00:10:16,360 I want you to treat her like garbage, okay? 288 00:10:16,396 --> 00:10:18,463 Throw stuff on her... Clothes, hot coffee. 289 00:10:18,531 --> 00:10:20,131 Have her make the hot coffee 290 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:21,933 and throw it on her... No, no. No, no, no. 291 00:10:22,001 --> 00:10:23,134 Have her throw it on herself, 292 00:10:23,236 --> 00:10:24,669 because I know you are a busy man. 293 00:10:24,737 --> 00:10:26,337 And she's garbage. 294 00:10:27,056 --> 00:10:28,206 Nice to meet you. 295 00:10:28,308 --> 00:10:30,074 And, Neil, please do not let 296 00:10:30,176 --> 00:10:33,377 your love and adoration for me spill over onto her. 297 00:10:33,446 --> 00:10:34,545 Put her in the mailroom. 298 00:10:34,647 --> 00:10:35,847 We don't have a mailroom. 299 00:10:35,915 --> 00:10:37,315 Whatever. Put her in the basement. 300 00:10:37,383 --> 00:10:39,650 Um, this isn't where we make the clothes, 301 00:10:39,719 --> 00:10:41,285 - but I hear ya. - Mm! 302 00:10:41,354 --> 00:10:42,453 Come on, Zoey. 303 00:10:42,522 --> 00:10:43,821 Let me show you your pen. 304 00:10:43,923 --> 00:10:45,556 - Okay. - Mm. 305 00:10:45,625 --> 00:10:47,358 It's really a cute desk in the corner. 306 00:10:47,460 --> 00:10:48,860 Okay. Is that vintage Givenchy? 307 00:10:48,928 --> 00:10:49,827 Good eye. 308 00:10:49,929 --> 00:10:52,096 - Thanks, I... - Hey, peon! Quiet! 309 00:10:52,165 --> 00:10:54,165 Zip it! Neil, thank you. 310 00:10:55,368 --> 00:10:56,734 I'm sorry about him. 311 00:10:56,803 --> 00:10:58,135 Dr. Rambo. 312 00:10:58,238 --> 00:10:59,437 Rainbow. 313 00:10:59,506 --> 00:11:00,438 I'd go with "Rambo." 314 00:11:00,507 --> 00:11:02,406 Yeah, people remember Rambo... hero. 315 00:11:02,442 --> 00:11:04,041 Anyhow, we got a ton of work to do. 316 00:11:04,077 --> 00:11:05,443 Where's that intern you begged me to hire? 317 00:11:05,545 --> 00:11:07,712 I did beg, and you did hire. 318 00:11:09,115 --> 00:11:11,616 S... Uh, well, you just missed her. She, uh... Yeah. 319 00:11:11,684 --> 00:11:14,552 S-She's here, just, you know... 320 00:11:14,621 --> 00:11:16,287 - working hard. - Oh, good. 321 00:11:16,389 --> 00:11:17,688 Well, if she's not, it's on your head. 322 00:11:17,790 --> 00:11:19,548 I don't do favors lightly. 323 00:11:19,654 --> 00:11:22,927 And when I'm crossed, I react with great vengeance. 324 00:11:23,539 --> 00:11:24,562 Ha! 325 00:11:24,631 --> 00:11:27,098 That is a fun thing to learn about you. 326 00:11:27,166 --> 00:11:28,432 Well, um, don't worry. 327 00:11:28,568 --> 00:11:31,335 I will oversee Zoey, and it'll be like... 328 00:11:31,404 --> 00:11:33,312 Like I'm doing the job myself. 329 00:11:33,381 --> 00:11:35,039 All right, well, just have her jiggle the legs 330 00:11:35,116 --> 00:11:36,574 of the big guy at the end of the hall. 331 00:11:36,643 --> 00:11:38,684 - Don't want his bed sores to burst. - Hmm. 332 00:11:38,786 --> 00:11:41,420 She will be the person to do it. 333 00:11:44,834 --> 00:11:46,417 That arcade is awesome! 334 00:11:46,486 --> 00:11:48,953 And you know what makes it even more awesome? 335 00:11:49,022 --> 00:11:51,923 Liberal amounts of hand sanitizer! 336 00:11:52,762 --> 00:11:54,292 There we go. 337 00:11:54,402 --> 00:11:56,260 Wow, those are a lot of tickets. 338 00:11:56,296 --> 00:11:59,163 Yeah, thanks for the tip on Pound-A-Possum the other day. 339 00:11:59,265 --> 00:12:00,406 We had some good luck. 340 00:12:00,475 --> 00:12:01,774 Ow! Ow! 341 00:12:01,843 --> 00:12:03,442 This hurts so bad! 342 00:12:03,511 --> 00:12:05,111 How bad you want that lava lamp, boy? 343 00:12:05,213 --> 00:12:05,912 I want it! 344 00:12:06,014 --> 00:12:08,247 Mm-hmm. Ow! Aah! Ow! 345 00:12:08,349 --> 00:12:09,916 Ooh, pizza! 346 00:12:09,984 --> 00:12:11,017 Don't eat that. 347 00:12:11,119 --> 00:12:13,819 But Pizza Possum pizza is delicious. 348 00:12:13,922 --> 00:12:16,455 It's so spicy and gamey. 349 00:12:16,491 --> 00:12:19,358 Yep, and it's pizza. 350 00:12:19,427 --> 00:12:20,626 But you don't want to fill up on that 351 00:12:20,695 --> 00:12:22,161 when there's all those tickets to win. 352 00:12:22,263 --> 00:12:23,562 Yay! Yay! 353 00:12:24,340 --> 00:12:25,298 Sure. 354 00:12:25,366 --> 00:12:27,630 You saved your family from Possum Pizza, 355 00:12:27,789 --> 00:12:30,109 but what about these other kids? 356 00:12:30,972 --> 00:12:32,338 For shame. 357 00:12:32,407 --> 00:12:34,240 You could really clean this place up, man. 358 00:12:34,309 --> 00:12:36,375 Come on. Be a whistle-blower. It's cool! 359 00:12:36,411 --> 00:12:37,710 Rachel Dolezal, 360 00:12:37,779 --> 00:12:41,213 the black president of the Spokane branch of the NAACP, 361 00:12:41,282 --> 00:12:44,817 has been lying... about her age. 362 00:12:44,886 --> 00:12:46,652 She was lying about her race. 363 00:12:46,721 --> 00:12:49,185 The point is, I was brave enough to stand up. 364 00:12:49,599 --> 00:12:50,851 You're right. 365 00:12:50,861 --> 00:12:54,126 I should be an upstander, not a bystander. 366 00:12:55,330 --> 00:12:57,730 If I could get corporate to clean up their act, 367 00:12:57,832 --> 00:12:59,899 this could be the "Totally possum" place 368 00:12:59,968 --> 00:13:01,200 my hat says it is. 369 00:13:01,269 --> 00:13:03,269 Don't eat that! 370 00:13:03,338 --> 00:13:04,337 What, even the chopped salad? 371 00:13:04,439 --> 00:13:06,872 Especially the chopped salad! 372 00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:09,809 There are no knives in the kitchen. 373 00:13:09,877 --> 00:13:13,045 Everything is done with hands and teeth. 374 00:13:15,478 --> 00:13:17,569 Guess what happened to me at Teen Vogue today. 375 00:13:17,579 --> 00:13:19,285 - Hmm? - I got promoted! 376 00:13:19,354 --> 00:13:20,553 Already? 377 00:13:20,621 --> 00:13:22,221 - You've only been there a week. - I know. 378 00:13:22,290 --> 00:13:24,991 They let me help pull looks for an editorial shoot. 379 00:13:25,093 --> 00:13:26,459 That's amazing! 380 00:13:26,561 --> 00:13:28,828 But you're mailroom garbage! Why isn't there coffee on you? 381 00:13:28,930 --> 00:13:30,196 Dre! 382 00:13:30,231 --> 00:13:32,298 T-They don't let garbage pull looks! 383 00:13:32,400 --> 00:13:34,433 Well, they did today. 384 00:13:34,535 --> 00:13:36,369 I'm so proud of her! 385 00:13:36,471 --> 00:13:38,270 What... 386 00:13:38,339 --> 00:13:40,072 Aren't... Aren't we proud of her? 387 00:13:40,141 --> 00:13:42,008 No. You don't get it, do you? 388 00:13:42,043 --> 00:13:44,276 The only reason she got promoted is because of me... Oh. 389 00:13:44,379 --> 00:13:46,112 Because I'm a superstar, all right? 390 00:13:46,180 --> 00:13:47,780 A legend, a wonderbread! 391 00:13:47,849 --> 00:13:50,583 I think you mean "a wunderkind." 392 00:13:50,651 --> 00:13:52,685 - Obviously. They're both great. - Okay. 393 00:13:52,720 --> 00:13:54,720 All right, she does not appreciate this. 394 00:13:54,822 --> 00:13:56,956 Now she's gonna think this is how the real world works. 395 00:13:57,025 --> 00:13:58,924 Dre, just give her this one. 396 00:13:59,894 --> 00:14:01,660 - Of course you don't get it. - Oh, my God. 397 00:14:01,763 --> 00:14:04,530 You've never had to struggle a day in your life. 398 00:14:04,632 --> 00:14:05,965 What?! 399 00:14:06,034 --> 00:14:09,368 Dre, I'm a black woman, and I went to medical school, 400 00:14:09,437 --> 00:14:12,938 and I have four children by a man-baby. 401 00:14:13,007 --> 00:14:15,541 So do not talk to me about struggle, okay? 402 00:14:15,551 --> 00:14:16,501 You know what? 403 00:14:16,511 --> 00:14:18,210 - You've been living it up here, all right? - I've b... 404 00:14:18,246 --> 00:14:20,980 Go to the refrigerator and eat your fresh fruit. 405 00:14:21,082 --> 00:14:23,949 I was 22 years old before I had fresh fruit. 406 00:14:24,052 --> 00:14:24,917 Okay. 407 00:14:24,986 --> 00:14:26,886 I'm "living it up." Seriously? 408 00:14:26,988 --> 00:14:29,255 Every day is like a nightmare with you. 409 00:14:29,357 --> 00:14:31,557 This is Andre Johnson Jr. 410 00:14:31,626 --> 00:14:34,727 I'm going to expose Pizza Possum. 411 00:14:34,796 --> 00:14:36,095 Shouldn't have shown my face. 412 00:14:36,197 --> 00:14:37,396 I'll take that out. 413 00:14:37,465 --> 00:14:39,999 Remember to take that out! 414 00:14:40,068 --> 00:14:41,934 Okay, let's put these on. 415 00:14:45,873 --> 00:14:47,173 What are you doing? 416 00:14:47,241 --> 00:14:49,508 I...wear glasses now. 417 00:14:49,610 --> 00:14:50,943 They look like spy glasses. 418 00:14:51,045 --> 00:14:54,046 No, that's the style. My sister works... 419 00:14:54,148 --> 00:14:55,381 Stop talking to me. 420 00:14:55,483 --> 00:14:57,349 Oof. Close call. 421 00:14:57,452 --> 00:14:59,285 Oh, and here we go. 422 00:14:59,320 --> 00:15:02,421 It's stakeout time, and I'm in it for the long... 423 00:15:03,458 --> 00:15:06,292 Oh, my God! 424 00:15:06,394 --> 00:15:08,127 Happy birthday, little Henry. 425 00:15:08,196 --> 00:15:10,596 I hope you wished for herpes. 426 00:15:10,665 --> 00:15:13,132 So, maybe Bow was right, and I should just be happy 427 00:15:13,234 --> 00:15:15,034 that I'm able to help my daughter. 428 00:15:15,103 --> 00:15:16,902 Lots of people who start with a leg up 429 00:15:17,004 --> 00:15:18,571 are still good, hard workers. 430 00:15:20,308 --> 00:15:21,674 Are you kidding me?! 431 00:15:21,709 --> 00:15:24,510 Shh! Do you know how hard it is to get him down?! 432 00:15:25,947 --> 00:15:28,247 Great, great. Now you've woken him up. 433 00:15:28,349 --> 00:15:30,149 Mm. Am I CEO yet? 434 00:15:30,218 --> 00:15:31,784 Almost, sweetheart. 435 00:15:31,853 --> 00:15:34,620 Try to get a few more winks before your lunch break. 436 00:15:34,722 --> 00:15:36,655 Here, have a sip-sip. 437 00:15:36,691 --> 00:15:38,924 Watching this fool take a mid-morning nap, 438 00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:41,427 I knew nepotism might get Zoey ahead, 439 00:15:41,529 --> 00:15:44,363 but it also puts her in danger of being useless. 440 00:15:44,398 --> 00:15:46,732 I couldn't let this happen to my daughter. 441 00:15:52,406 --> 00:15:54,140 I shouldn't have sent that video. 442 00:15:54,242 --> 00:15:56,775 They know! They're watching me! 443 00:16:05,153 --> 00:16:06,385 If they're willing to kill you, 444 00:16:06,454 --> 00:16:07,486 then that's the price we'll pay. 445 00:16:07,588 --> 00:16:08,387 What? 446 00:16:08,456 --> 00:16:10,689 I'm 16! I-I've barely lived! 447 00:16:10,791 --> 00:16:13,592 Mm, a life sacrificed for honor is the only life to live. 448 00:16:15,563 --> 00:16:16,996 Okay. 449 00:16:17,064 --> 00:16:19,532 If they silence me, will you tell my story? 450 00:16:19,600 --> 00:16:22,201 Since you won't be able to hold me to it, yes. 451 00:16:22,270 --> 00:16:23,836 So, I went over to Teen Vogue 452 00:16:23,938 --> 00:16:26,438 to save Zoey from becoming a worthless loser. 453 00:16:26,541 --> 00:16:27,439 Hey. 454 00:16:27,542 --> 00:16:29,575 I demand that you demote Zoey Johnson. 455 00:16:29,677 --> 00:16:30,609 Excuse me? 456 00:16:30,711 --> 00:16:31,610 You are the editor, right? 457 00:16:31,712 --> 00:16:32,912 Well, that depends... 458 00:16:33,014 --> 00:16:34,046 How crazy are you? 459 00:16:34,148 --> 00:16:35,981 I will not let you turn my little girl 460 00:16:36,083 --> 00:16:37,516 into a useless, entitled brat 461 00:16:37,618 --> 00:16:39,318 who is sleeping her way to the top, 462 00:16:39,420 --> 00:16:40,452 like Connie Stevens. 463 00:16:40,555 --> 00:16:41,887 Okay, you're that kind of crazy. 464 00:16:41,989 --> 00:16:43,255 Right, I must sound ridiculous. 465 00:16:43,357 --> 00:16:45,791 I-I meant "napping". Napping her way to the top. 466 00:16:45,893 --> 00:16:48,327 B-But the point is, Zoey is unqualified 467 00:16:48,429 --> 00:16:50,696 and does not deserve that promotion. 468 00:16:50,798 --> 00:16:52,298 Thanks, Dad. 469 00:16:53,701 --> 00:16:56,368 That voice I heard belonged to my daughter, didn't it? 470 00:16:56,470 --> 00:16:58,470 I believe that's why she called you "Dad." 471 00:17:00,898 --> 00:17:04,187 What is going on, and why are you making my staff cry? 472 00:17:04,197 --> 00:17:05,799 Hey, look, I'm doing this for her own good. 473 00:17:05,809 --> 00:17:07,942 I-I know you're only giving Zoey the special treatment 474 00:17:08,044 --> 00:17:09,310 because of my star status, 475 00:17:09,412 --> 00:17:11,412 my unparalleled genius, my wunderkind. 476 00:17:11,481 --> 00:17:13,181 You have no idea who I am, do you? 477 00:17:13,249 --> 00:17:14,482 - No, I don't. - Hmm. 478 00:17:14,551 --> 00:17:17,151 But that young lady that you just insulted... 479 00:17:17,253 --> 00:17:19,053 She is a star. 480 00:17:19,122 --> 00:17:21,556 And if there's anyone getting a promotion at Teen Vogue, 481 00:17:21,624 --> 00:17:23,658 it's because they deserve it... 482 00:17:23,727 --> 00:17:26,394 except my assistant whose dad owns the company. 483 00:17:26,463 --> 00:17:27,495 Wait, wait, wait. 484 00:17:27,564 --> 00:17:29,630 Did you just say my daughter's a star? 485 00:17:29,733 --> 00:17:30,732 I did. 486 00:17:30,834 --> 00:17:33,167 And now I'm calling security. 487 00:17:34,104 --> 00:17:36,471 Boom! I did it! 488 00:17:36,539 --> 00:17:39,366 I got an e-mail from Pizza Possum HQ. 489 00:17:39,569 --> 00:17:41,576 "Dear Andre Johnson Jr"... 490 00:17:41,678 --> 00:17:43,945 You gave them your name. Bold. 491 00:17:44,013 --> 00:17:46,781 Well, I forgot to cut it out of my exposé video. 492 00:17:46,883 --> 00:17:48,783 But listen... 493 00:17:48,818 --> 00:17:50,451 "Thank you for bringing to our attention 494 00:17:50,553 --> 00:17:53,588 the unacceptable practices at Branch 641. 495 00:17:53,656 --> 00:17:56,090 Be assured we will take immediate action 496 00:17:56,159 --> 00:17:57,859 to rectify this situation. 497 00:17:57,927 --> 00:18:01,295 We will not play possum with these accusations." 498 00:18:01,397 --> 00:18:02,463 I did it! 499 00:18:02,565 --> 00:18:03,664 Whistle blown! 500 00:18:03,767 --> 00:18:05,304 - Junior... - Whew. 501 00:18:05,595 --> 00:18:07,959 Today you made a lot of kids happy. 502 00:18:08,471 --> 00:18:10,805 - I hate you. - You ruined my life. 503 00:18:10,907 --> 00:18:13,641 I just wanted them to clean it up... for you. 504 00:18:13,676 --> 00:18:15,843 Get off you high horse, Long Head. 505 00:18:15,912 --> 00:18:18,412 Who thinks pizza places are clean, huh? 506 00:18:18,481 --> 00:18:20,448 Now our tickets are worthless. 507 00:18:20,517 --> 00:18:23,518 Hey, at the end of the day, I did the right thing, 508 00:18:23,620 --> 00:18:25,286 and I've got my integrity. 509 00:18:26,222 --> 00:18:28,356 Thanks a lot, Pizza Nerd! 510 00:18:30,226 --> 00:18:32,160 Was that Mom? 511 00:18:32,262 --> 00:18:35,797 No, that was just "people." 512 00:18:37,867 --> 00:18:38,766 I'll send it to you. 513 00:18:38,868 --> 00:18:40,368 All right, that's great. Thanks. 514 00:18:40,470 --> 00:18:41,536 Okay. 515 00:18:42,536 --> 00:18:43,694 Hey. 516 00:18:44,188 --> 00:18:45,706 Are you here to throw coffee on me? 517 00:18:45,775 --> 00:18:46,974 Okay, look, I don't have that much time 518 00:18:47,010 --> 00:18:49,627 before security finds me again, so let me get this out. 519 00:18:49,637 --> 00:18:50,578 Mm-hmm? 520 00:18:50,647 --> 00:18:52,547 Elaine tells me that you're a star. 521 00:18:52,615 --> 00:18:53,548 Well, I am. 522 00:18:53,616 --> 00:18:54,882 I'm kind of killing it around here, 523 00:18:54,951 --> 00:18:57,151 despite what you obviously think. 524 00:18:57,477 --> 00:18:58,801 I'm sorry. 525 00:18:58,915 --> 00:19:01,889 But Elaine says you have great ideas. 526 00:19:01,991 --> 00:19:04,458 Re-creating Anna Wintour's first Vogue cover... 527 00:19:04,527 --> 00:19:05,426 That's dope. 528 00:19:05,528 --> 00:19:07,061 How did you come up with that? 529 00:19:07,130 --> 00:19:08,696 It just came to me. 530 00:19:08,765 --> 00:19:11,299 All of this stuff sort of comes easy to me, 531 00:19:11,401 --> 00:19:13,067 like you with advertising. 532 00:19:13,169 --> 00:19:16,237 Hey, I killed myself to get where I am in advertising. 533 00:19:16,339 --> 00:19:17,605 When I was coming up, 534 00:19:17,674 --> 00:19:20,741 I had to fight for every opportunity I got. 535 00:19:20,810 --> 00:19:23,678 And it was that fight that made me appreciate it more. 536 00:19:24,780 --> 00:19:27,029 I guess that's all I ever wanted for you. 537 00:19:27,039 --> 00:19:29,050 You think I don't appreciate this job 538 00:19:29,118 --> 00:19:31,319 just because you gave it to me? 539 00:19:31,421 --> 00:19:34,551 Look, sure, I hooked you up, but my star power, 540 00:19:34,561 --> 00:19:36,891 - it will only get you so far. - Ooh, okay, Dad, 541 00:19:36,993 --> 00:19:39,861 I don't think you have as much star power as you think. 542 00:19:39,963 --> 00:19:41,696 Exactly! 543 00:19:42,533 --> 00:19:45,399 What I mean is that I can get your foot in the door, 544 00:19:45,709 --> 00:19:47,812 but you're gonna have to go the distance on your own. 545 00:19:47,914 --> 00:19:49,180 That's fine. 546 00:19:49,282 --> 00:19:52,250 And I'll work just as hard to get to where I want to be 547 00:19:52,352 --> 00:19:55,787 as you worked to get to where you are. 548 00:19:56,890 --> 00:19:58,389 You will, won't you? 549 00:19:58,491 --> 00:20:00,658 Yeah, so just let me do my thing. 550 00:20:00,760 --> 00:20:02,326 I'll figure it out. 551 00:20:02,429 --> 00:20:04,695 I won't be there to catch you if you fall. 552 00:20:04,798 --> 00:20:06,764 Don't expect you to. 553 00:20:09,803 --> 00:20:11,235 What are you working on? 554 00:20:11,337 --> 00:20:13,871 I found this app where I can put together looks 555 00:20:13,940 --> 00:20:15,873 to style my own editorial shoot. Mm-hmm? 556 00:20:15,975 --> 00:20:17,675 I'm just practicing. 557 00:20:17,777 --> 00:20:20,078 That's what I'm talking about. 558 00:20:21,739 --> 00:20:23,641 Ah, papaya. 559 00:20:23,879 --> 00:20:25,375 Must be nice. 560 00:20:25,385 --> 00:20:27,085 Didn't have that till I was 30. 561 00:20:27,187 --> 00:20:28,553 Never had mango. 562 00:20:28,655 --> 00:20:30,622 Not now, Dre. 563 00:20:30,724 --> 00:20:32,591 I earned this. 564 00:20:32,693 --> 00:20:35,393 This is the first fresh thing that I've seen all day. 565 00:20:38,665 --> 00:20:40,365 Ugh. 566 00:20:43,538 --> 00:20:45,170 Oh, God! Oh, God! Okay! 567 00:20:45,272 --> 00:20:46,705 Oh, my... Oh. 568 00:20:46,807 --> 00:20:48,406 Oh, God. It's pee. 569 00:20:48,508 --> 00:20:50,642 - Interns work very hard. - Mm-hmm. 570 00:20:50,744 --> 00:20:52,077 So hard, in fact, 571 00:20:52,179 --> 00:20:54,512 that they get promotions and more hours, 572 00:20:54,615 --> 00:20:55,847 and then they just start thinking about 573 00:20:55,949 --> 00:20:59,084 the benefits of... amphetamines. 574 00:20:59,186 --> 00:21:00,584 Okay.