1 00:00:00,821 --> 00:00:05,063 America... Land of the free and home of the brave. 2 00:00:05,088 --> 00:00:07,580 Emphasis on "home." 3 00:00:07,659 --> 00:00:10,878 Because we are the worst at vacations. 4 00:00:10,949 --> 00:00:15,418 52% of Americans don't even use all their vacation days. 5 00:00:15,520 --> 00:00:16,852 We're workaholics. 6 00:00:16,955 --> 00:00:20,865 Our jobs don't necessarily encourage time away. 7 00:00:20,959 --> 00:00:22,505 Well, I'll only be gone for six days. 8 00:00:22,584 --> 00:00:23,893 You won't even miss me. 9 00:00:23,962 --> 00:00:26,128 - Sure. Take your vacation, Dre. - All right. 10 00:00:26,197 --> 00:00:29,932 Hey, uh, Josh, can you bring me that Malik fellow's résumé? 11 00:00:30,001 --> 00:00:31,659 The one with the, uh, flashy sweaters 12 00:00:31,737 --> 00:00:33,336 who's desperate to get a foot in the door. 13 00:00:33,428 --> 00:00:36,229 Hey, don't worry about that. That has nothing to do with you. 14 00:00:37,371 --> 00:00:38,603 Or does it? 15 00:00:39,331 --> 00:00:40,731 Have a great trip, Dre. 16 00:00:41,967 --> 00:00:43,700 But in the Johnson family, 17 00:00:43,769 --> 00:00:47,237 we know how important it is to have a work-life balance, 18 00:00:47,306 --> 00:00:50,407 so we were going to get our vacation. 19 00:00:50,476 --> 00:00:52,176 Mm! Bam! 20 00:00:52,244 --> 00:00:54,511 Look at that, baby. Huh? Too much or not enough? Huh? 21 00:00:54,580 --> 00:00:56,013 Hey, don't... don't worry about it. 22 00:00:56,081 --> 00:00:57,714 I'm bringing it. 23 00:00:57,783 --> 00:00:59,449 Why aren't you packing a bag yet? 24 00:00:59,518 --> 00:01:02,081 Because I have to move 10 surgeries, 25 00:01:02,106 --> 00:01:04,918 find someone to watch the dog, call the kids' school... 26 00:01:04,943 --> 00:01:06,876 Come on, Bow, you're off the clock, baby. 27 00:01:06,945 --> 00:01:08,466 - Put a questionable bathing suit - Never. 28 00:01:08,513 --> 00:01:09,747 in the bag and let's go! 29 00:01:09,809 --> 00:01:11,414 It's México. 30 00:01:11,516 --> 00:01:13,750 That's right. 31 00:01:13,852 --> 00:01:15,418 México. 32 00:01:15,510 --> 00:01:20,246 We're talking sun, fun, and relaxation. 33 00:01:20,291 --> 00:01:23,815 Unfortunately, the plane, ferry, and taxi 34 00:01:23,840 --> 00:01:26,941 to get there almost killed us. 35 00:01:28,244 --> 00:01:29,490 Come on. 36 00:01:30,313 --> 00:01:32,280 We made it. 37 00:01:32,348 --> 00:01:33,347 Bienvenidos. 38 00:01:33,660 --> 00:01:35,226 Johnsons checking in, please. 39 00:01:35,295 --> 00:01:37,762 Can we please go to the pool to wash off the airplane stink? 40 00:01:37,864 --> 00:01:38,997 Okay, hold on a second. 41 00:01:39,065 --> 00:01:40,098 I want to hit the game room, 42 00:01:40,167 --> 00:01:41,766 play some foosball, hustle some chumps. 43 00:01:41,844 --> 00:01:43,501 I said hold on a second. 44 00:01:43,570 --> 00:01:46,790 Can I get a spa pass while you guys work out the formalities? 45 00:01:46,815 --> 00:01:49,626 I am carrying a lot of Stevens & Lido stress, 46 00:01:49,651 --> 00:01:52,321 and I need a big-handed Swede to make me right. 47 00:01:52,321 --> 00:01:55,799 No one is going anywhere until we check in. 48 00:01:55,824 --> 00:01:56,857 - Hello. - Hi! 49 00:01:56,925 --> 00:01:58,158 I have your reservation right here. 50 00:01:58,227 --> 00:01:59,526 - Oh, thank you. - Ohh! 51 00:01:59,595 --> 00:02:01,294 But unfortunately, your rooms won't be ready till 4:00. 52 00:02:01,363 --> 00:02:03,557 Ohh. Interesting choice to pick a flight 53 00:02:03,582 --> 00:02:05,748 that arrived two hours before check-in time. 54 00:02:05,851 --> 00:02:07,984 Enough! Okay?! 55 00:02:08,053 --> 00:02:09,819 I cashed in most of my personal days 56 00:02:09,888 --> 00:02:13,604 so we could take this vacation, and we will enjoy it together! 57 00:02:13,667 --> 00:02:15,118 Now... 58 00:02:15,827 --> 00:02:17,527 let's have some fun, okay? 59 00:02:17,629 --> 00:02:18,595 Okay. 60 00:02:18,697 --> 00:02:21,033 I said, are we gonna have some fun? 61 00:02:21,058 --> 00:02:22,324 - Yes, sir. - All the fun! 62 00:02:22,426 --> 00:02:23,560 Damn straight. 63 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:27,064 This is actually the best start to a vacation we have ever had. 64 00:02:27,731 --> 00:02:30,642 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com 65 00:02:30,734 --> 00:02:32,634 06x13 - Kid Life Crisis 66 00:02:32,736 --> 00:02:34,703 There's no chairs! 67 00:02:35,055 --> 00:02:36,388 Why are there no chairs? 68 00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:38,523 Just look and see if somebody's getting up. 69 00:02:38,625 --> 00:02:39,924 Oh, oh, oh! Oh, oh, oh! 70 00:02:40,026 --> 00:02:41,626 There's three. There's three. Move, move, move. Go. 71 00:02:41,728 --> 00:02:43,194 Three? T-There's six of us. 72 00:02:43,296 --> 00:02:45,363 You shared a womb. You can share a chair. 73 00:02:45,465 --> 00:02:46,664 Go, go, go! 74 00:02:46,767 --> 00:02:47,932 Goodness. 75 00:02:49,671 --> 00:02:51,429 - Oh, God. - Ugh. 76 00:02:51,491 --> 00:02:52,871 These chairs are by the bathroom. 77 00:02:52,973 --> 00:02:54,072 I know. It stinks. It's disgusting. 78 00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:55,676 Dad, can you talk to someone? 79 00:02:55,676 --> 00:02:57,609 Who? The Chair Wizard? 80 00:02:57,711 --> 00:02:59,311 All right, you know what? 81 00:02:59,413 --> 00:03:00,979 We're staking claim right here, all right? 82 00:03:01,081 --> 00:03:03,549 Circle the wagons. This is now Johnsonville! 83 00:03:03,651 --> 00:03:05,951 - Johnsonville. - Man, we really need this, Mom, 84 00:03:06,053 --> 00:03:07,319 - don't we? - Yes. 85 00:03:07,421 --> 00:03:09,288 I mean, you have been stuck in wall-to-wall surgeries, 86 00:03:09,390 --> 00:03:13,392 and sometimes Stevens & Lido keeps me till, like, 6:30. 87 00:03:13,494 --> 00:03:15,794 Yeah. Basically the same job. 88 00:03:15,896 --> 00:03:17,696 You know, I am glad you see the hustle. 89 00:03:17,798 --> 00:03:19,264 - Mm-hmm. - All right, I'm gonna go do a lap. 90 00:03:19,366 --> 00:03:21,667 Oh. So, when are we gonna hit the resort water park? 91 00:03:21,769 --> 00:03:23,135 What? 92 00:03:23,237 --> 00:03:24,436 We just sat down. 93 00:03:24,538 --> 00:03:27,573 But they got an insane slide called the Lemon Drop. 94 00:03:27,675 --> 00:03:29,007 - It has 32 loops. - Ooh! 95 00:03:29,109 --> 00:03:31,276 They won't even let you on if you have a full bladder. 96 00:03:31,378 --> 00:03:33,278 I just carried half of the room down here. 97 00:03:33,380 --> 00:03:34,446 I haven't even had a chance 98 00:03:34,548 --> 00:03:36,415 to make fun of white people's sunburn yet. 99 00:03:36,517 --> 00:03:38,317 Come on, Dad. Please? 100 00:03:38,419 --> 00:03:40,686 Come on! It's a family vacation! 101 00:03:40,788 --> 00:03:42,588 That's what you do on a family vacation. 102 00:03:42,690 --> 00:03:43,789 It'll be fun! 103 00:03:43,891 --> 00:03:45,791 Okay! Okay. Give me five minutes, 104 00:03:45,893 --> 00:03:47,626 all right, so I can pick out my sunburn champs. 105 00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:48,927 Oh, thank you so much. 106 00:03:49,312 --> 00:03:50,512 You're on the clock. 107 00:03:50,614 --> 00:03:51,779 Come on, Devante. 108 00:03:51,882 --> 00:03:53,181 Let's go. 109 00:03:53,283 --> 00:03:54,682 - Thanks, Diane. - Mm-hmm. 110 00:03:54,784 --> 00:03:56,184 - Babe. - Huh? 111 00:03:56,286 --> 00:03:57,652 Look at that couple over there by the stairs. 112 00:03:57,754 --> 00:03:59,053 They're not on the clock. 113 00:03:59,155 --> 00:04:01,789 They're too Black and sexy to worry about time. 114 00:04:01,892 --> 00:04:04,959 They look like us during the three seconds 115 00:04:05,061 --> 00:04:07,362 between when we met and when we had kids. 116 00:04:07,464 --> 00:04:09,764 - That was a great three seconds, babe. - So good, Dre. 117 00:04:09,866 --> 00:04:11,332 What happened to our Black and sexy? 118 00:04:11,357 --> 00:04:12,410 I don't know. 119 00:04:12,435 --> 00:04:13,801 Now we're just Black and tired. 120 00:04:13,904 --> 00:04:16,571 They look like they're having such a nice vacation. 121 00:04:16,673 --> 00:04:17,839 You know what? 122 00:04:17,941 --> 00:04:20,008 We could probably get a little of what they have. 123 00:04:20,110 --> 00:04:21,075 What do you mean? 124 00:04:21,177 --> 00:04:22,443 You know, who says the vacation 125 00:04:22,546 --> 00:04:24,412 has to always be about the kids? 126 00:04:24,514 --> 00:04:25,647 - Well, I mean... - You know what? 127 00:04:25,749 --> 00:04:27,882 We can take them to the nice restaurant. 128 00:04:27,984 --> 00:04:30,318 The kids are old enough. Devante's off the boob. 129 00:04:31,354 --> 00:04:32,620 - You're right. - Mm. 130 00:04:32,722 --> 00:04:34,389 We are paying for this vacation. 131 00:04:34,491 --> 00:04:36,424 - We should do what we want to do. - Exactly. 132 00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:39,427 The perfect vacation starts no... 133 00:04:39,529 --> 00:04:42,697 Stand back and watch the King of Corn Hole 134 00:04:42,799 --> 00:04:44,132 toss his bag. 135 00:04:45,135 --> 00:04:46,935 Ooh! 136 00:04:47,037 --> 00:04:49,070 Looks like the King of Corn Hole needs to work on his aim. 137 00:04:49,172 --> 00:04:50,772 I'm used to two-pound bags. 138 00:04:50,874 --> 00:04:52,206 I'm so sorry about that. 139 00:04:52,309 --> 00:04:54,409 If you wanted to meet me, you could've just said "hello." 140 00:04:54,511 --> 00:04:56,010 I'm Lily. 141 00:04:56,112 --> 00:04:57,011 Andre. 142 00:04:57,113 --> 00:04:58,212 So, what are you doing here? 143 00:04:58,315 --> 00:04:59,847 Besides throwing bean bags at strangers? 144 00:04:59,950 --> 00:05:02,617 Well, I work at a pretty intense job 145 00:05:02,719 --> 00:05:03,851 in the ad industry. 146 00:05:03,954 --> 00:05:05,186 You know, grinding. 147 00:05:05,288 --> 00:05:07,021 But, you know, sometimes it's important 148 00:05:07,123 --> 00:05:08,790 to set your e-mail to "out of office," 149 00:05:08,892 --> 00:05:12,460 kick back, and reward yourself for all of your successes. 150 00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:13,995 - Our mom and dad brought us here. - Mm-hmm. 151 00:05:14,097 --> 00:05:15,697 Both of those things can be true. 152 00:05:15,799 --> 00:05:18,533 It's okay, I'm here with my family, too. 153 00:05:18,635 --> 00:05:19,968 Maybe we could ditch our families 154 00:05:20,070 --> 00:05:21,135 and meet up at the club later? 155 00:05:21,237 --> 00:05:23,204 I got to check my schedule. 156 00:05:23,306 --> 00:05:25,640 The only thing on your schedule is dinner with your parents. 157 00:05:25,742 --> 00:05:26,774 Mm. 158 00:05:26,876 --> 00:05:29,177 Well, maybe I'll catch up with you later, then. 159 00:05:29,279 --> 00:05:31,112 Yeah. You will. 160 00:05:31,214 --> 00:05:34,082 Try not to bean any other girls between now and then. 161 00:05:37,621 --> 00:05:38,953 Why, Diane? 162 00:05:39,055 --> 00:05:40,088 Why? 163 00:05:40,190 --> 00:05:42,857 It's my vacation, too, Andre. 164 00:05:42,959 --> 00:05:46,097 After 10 water slides, three shave ice runs, 165 00:05:46,167 --> 00:05:49,497 and five minutes where Devante locked himself in the bathroom, 166 00:05:49,599 --> 00:05:52,300 Bow and I were thrilled to sit down 167 00:05:52,402 --> 00:05:56,237 for a nice, civilized dinner with the entire family. 168 00:05:56,339 --> 00:05:58,506 Uh, I don't see butter noodles anywhere. 169 00:05:58,608 --> 00:05:59,874 - Mm. - Come on, Jack. 170 00:05:59,976 --> 00:06:02,043 This is a nice place, man. 171 00:06:02,145 --> 00:06:03,344 Try something new. 172 00:06:03,446 --> 00:06:06,214 I'm just saying... they've got butter, they've got noodles. 173 00:06:06,316 --> 00:06:08,249 I'm just gonna ask them to make it off menu. 174 00:06:08,351 --> 00:06:09,450 We can pay the upcharge. 175 00:06:09,552 --> 00:06:11,085 Pshew, pshew. 176 00:06:11,187 --> 00:06:13,187 Why does the piano guy keep playing jazz? 177 00:06:13,289 --> 00:06:15,790 Yo, Elton John! Do you know Post Malone?! 178 00:06:15,892 --> 00:06:17,258 - Post Malone! - Hey! 179 00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:21,358 Can we just enjoy this dinner as a family? 180 00:06:21,444 --> 00:06:24,365 - Yes. - Welp, it is about that time. 181 00:06:24,467 --> 00:06:27,168 I am gonna go meet Lily at Club Coronado. 182 00:06:27,270 --> 00:06:30,204 She's got daddy issues and I've got understanding eyes. 183 00:06:30,249 --> 00:06:31,282 No! 184 00:06:31,307 --> 00:06:34,075 Sit your ass down. 185 00:06:36,513 --> 00:06:41,049 All we wanted was one nice family dinner, 186 00:06:41,151 --> 00:06:43,084 and you guys can't even let us have that. 187 00:06:43,186 --> 00:06:44,793 - We did everything you wanted. - Everything. 188 00:06:44,821 --> 00:06:46,187 - Water parks. - Ugh. 189 00:06:46,289 --> 00:06:47,855 - Shaved ice stations. - Pfft. 190 00:06:47,918 --> 00:06:50,051 Horseback riding on the beach. 191 00:06:50,105 --> 00:06:52,694 Yeah, because family vacations are about the kids. 192 00:06:52,796 --> 00:06:55,196 - What? - Come on. You know the score, dawg. 193 00:06:55,298 --> 00:06:56,497 Y'all are terrorists. 194 00:06:56,599 --> 00:06:57,598 And you know what? 195 00:06:57,701 --> 00:07:01,069 We don't negotiate with terrorists. 196 00:07:01,171 --> 00:07:04,605 We are done catering to your demands. 197 00:07:04,708 --> 00:07:06,574 You don't deserve this vacation. 198 00:07:06,676 --> 00:07:07,842 - We do. - Mm-hmm. 199 00:07:07,944 --> 00:07:09,777 Yeah. You kids. 200 00:07:09,879 --> 00:07:11,979 You just don't understand. 201 00:07:12,082 --> 00:07:13,381 Unh-unh. 202 00:07:13,483 --> 00:07:15,316 You are one of them. 203 00:07:15,418 --> 00:07:17,103 And you know what we're about to do, Junior? 204 00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:20,571 We are dumping all of your siblings on you 205 00:07:20,673 --> 00:07:25,176 so your mom and I can go see whatever Club Coronado is. 206 00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:27,979 Dad I've got to go see about a girl. 207 00:07:28,081 --> 00:07:29,580 - Mom... - Hey! 208 00:07:29,682 --> 00:07:30,715 Look at me. 209 00:07:31,985 --> 00:07:35,453 You are the parent now. 210 00:07:35,555 --> 00:07:39,423 And as of this moment, your mom and I are on vacation. 211 00:07:39,526 --> 00:07:42,593 - How do you like that score, dawg? - Mm-hmm. 212 00:07:42,695 --> 00:07:43,844 And don't even think about running, 213 00:07:43,897 --> 00:07:45,993 - because we have your passports. - Yeah. 214 00:07:48,093 --> 00:07:49,929 So, we ditched our kids in favor of 215 00:07:49,999 --> 00:07:53,122 an adult rendezvous at Club Coronado. 216 00:07:53,208 --> 00:07:55,473 - This place is sexy. - Yeah, it is. 217 00:07:55,559 --> 00:07:58,036 I feel like I'm on The Rock's Instagram. 218 00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:01,522 - To us. - Mm. 219 00:08:01,623 --> 00:08:04,996 To us being out at night and looking so good. 220 00:08:05,066 --> 00:08:06,035 Mm! 221 00:08:06,073 --> 00:08:09,089 And pretending that we love this mescal. 222 00:08:09,114 --> 00:08:11,063 Oh. Well, speak for yourself. I do love it. 223 00:08:11,961 --> 00:08:13,217 - Mm. Babe, look. - Mm? 224 00:08:13,257 --> 00:08:14,615 There's that other Black couple... you know, 225 00:08:14,692 --> 00:08:17,460 the ones that look like they belong on the cover of a fitness DVD? 226 00:08:17,562 --> 00:08:20,342 Hey! Black LaLanne! Light-Skin Fonda! 227 00:08:20,397 --> 00:08:21,633 Hey, we're celebrating. 228 00:08:21,704 --> 00:08:23,156 - Come join us. - Come over! 229 00:08:23,234 --> 00:08:24,180 - All right. - All right. 230 00:08:24,250 --> 00:08:25,312 - Hey. - Hey, guys. 231 00:08:25,383 --> 00:08:26,396 - How are you? - How are you? 232 00:08:26,450 --> 00:08:27,364 - All right. - All right. 233 00:08:27,442 --> 00:08:28,684 - That's a pretty dress. Hi. - How's it going? 234 00:08:28,753 --> 00:08:31,805 - Doing all right? - So, what are we celebrating? 235 00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:33,928 - Birthday? Anniversary? - Nope. 236 00:08:34,503 --> 00:08:35,699 We abandoned our children. 237 00:08:35,724 --> 00:08:36,856 - Yes, we did. - What? 238 00:08:36,925 --> 00:08:38,067 Just for one night, though. 239 00:08:38,130 --> 00:08:39,458 - Okay. - Do not call "Dateline." 240 00:08:39,503 --> 00:08:41,584 - Okay, we won't. - Okay, good. 241 00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:43,021 This is my husband. This is Dre Johnson, 242 00:08:43,090 --> 00:08:44,289 - and I am Dr. Rainbow Johnson. - Hey. How are you? 243 00:08:44,358 --> 00:08:45,981 So nice to meet you. Tanya and Lewis Chaplin. 244 00:08:46,036 --> 00:08:49,247 So, how did you guys abandon your children? 245 00:08:49,294 --> 00:08:50,138 Yes. 246 00:08:50,167 --> 00:08:51,894 - We are on a surf trip. - Mm-hmm. 247 00:08:51,928 --> 00:08:53,591 We actually don't have kids. 248 00:08:53,616 --> 00:08:54,647 Oh? Well, you want some? 249 00:08:55,952 --> 00:08:56,964 - We have five, - Five. 250 00:08:56,988 --> 00:08:58,035 and we don't mind giving up a few. 251 00:08:58,097 --> 00:08:59,154 - Maybe three, four. - Yep. 252 00:08:59,189 --> 00:09:01,066 - Mm, we're gonna pass on taking one of your children. - Yeah, we're good. 253 00:09:01,091 --> 00:09:02,190 - Really? - Yeah. 254 00:09:02,259 --> 00:09:04,686 But maybe you guys could help us 255 00:09:04,711 --> 00:09:06,845 finish off this bottle of Japanese whiskey. 256 00:09:06,914 --> 00:09:08,346 Ohh! 257 00:09:08,415 --> 00:09:10,272 - It is a good one. - One second, one second. 258 00:09:10,350 --> 00:09:11,554 - Diapers?! - It's Junior. 259 00:09:11,616 --> 00:09:13,284 Worse than the one on the plane! 260 00:09:13,387 --> 00:09:15,388 Had to use a tamale husk! 261 00:09:16,181 --> 00:09:18,593 - We'll take that bottle. - Yes! There we go. 262 00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:23,328 Mm. All right. 263 00:09:23,431 --> 00:09:24,430 Cheers. 264 00:09:24,500 --> 00:09:26,102 To Black faces in white spaces. 265 00:09:26,147 --> 00:09:27,156 - There it is. - That's right. 266 00:09:27,180 --> 00:09:29,935 I like that. So, a surfer couple, huh? 267 00:09:30,004 --> 00:09:32,571 Yeah. It, uh, it kind of became our thing. 268 00:09:32,673 --> 00:09:33,839 - Ohh. - That's really sweet. 269 00:09:33,908 --> 00:09:35,374 - You know, we have a thing, too. - Mm-hmm. 270 00:09:35,476 --> 00:09:36,508 Yes, we do. 271 00:09:36,577 --> 00:09:39,721 So, when the kids go to bed, we get in bed... 272 00:09:39,746 --> 00:09:40,712 Oh. 273 00:09:40,814 --> 00:09:42,948 ...and we watch... 274 00:09:43,016 --> 00:09:44,282 "Madam Secretary"... 275 00:09:44,351 --> 00:09:46,685 ...until we fall asleep. 276 00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:49,488 And to be honest, we haven't made it through an episode yet, 277 00:09:49,556 --> 00:09:52,400 so we have no idea what this woman is the secretary of. 278 00:09:53,761 --> 00:09:55,194 That's hilarious. 279 00:09:55,296 --> 00:09:56,295 Oh, man. 280 00:09:56,364 --> 00:09:57,906 Uh, listen, I can't tell you 281 00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,531 how happy we are that we met you guys... 282 00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:02,034 - Ohh! - ...but, uh, we have an early morning. 283 00:10:02,102 --> 00:10:03,101 - No! What? - What? 284 00:10:03,170 --> 00:10:04,369 - Yeah. Sorry. - Yeah. 285 00:10:04,438 --> 00:10:06,571 Believe me, there is nothing like watching the sunrise 286 00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:08,640 from a board 100 yards from shore. 287 00:10:08,709 --> 00:10:12,144 It is like we are the only two people in the world. 288 00:10:12,212 --> 00:10:14,212 - Mm-hmm. - Aww. 289 00:10:15,582 --> 00:10:17,015 You guys have a good night. All right? 290 00:10:17,084 --> 00:10:19,469 - So great talking to you. - Enjoy the sunrise! 291 00:10:19,494 --> 00:10:21,027 Thank you. We will. 292 00:10:21,129 --> 00:10:23,363 - Good night. - Good night. 293 00:10:23,431 --> 00:10:25,198 - Baby? - Mm? 294 00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:27,164 I want to learn how to surf. 295 00:10:27,266 --> 00:10:28,984 - Dre... - Hmm? 296 00:10:29,086 --> 00:10:30,880 - You don't know how to swim. - I don't. 297 00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:32,580 - You hate the water. - I do. 298 00:10:32,648 --> 00:10:34,348 You have zero upper-body strength. 299 00:10:34,417 --> 00:10:36,319 Okay, I don't want to learn how to surf, 300 00:10:36,344 --> 00:10:39,111 but I do want what Tanya and Lewis have. 301 00:10:39,180 --> 00:10:42,148 I know, right? Come on. It's so sweet. 302 00:10:42,216 --> 00:10:44,817 - It is. - To have something that's just for us. 303 00:10:44,886 --> 00:10:46,285 - Mm-hmm. - You know? 304 00:10:46,354 --> 00:10:48,250 Dre, I want to watch the sunrise with you. 305 00:10:48,289 --> 00:10:50,500 Baby, we would, if only 306 00:10:50,525 --> 00:10:54,482 - it weren't so early in the morning. - It's so early. 307 00:10:54,550 --> 00:10:58,476 ♪ Oh, give me the beat, boys, and free my soul ♪ 308 00:10:58,501 --> 00:10:59,801 ♪ I wanna get lost... ♪ 309 00:10:59,826 --> 00:11:01,325 Thanks for being flexible. 310 00:11:01,394 --> 00:11:04,795 I promise karaoke will be just as fun as Club Coronado. 311 00:11:04,897 --> 00:11:06,230 Yeah, no problem. 312 00:11:06,332 --> 00:11:08,852 Are you sure Devante's okay? It's kind of loud. 313 00:11:10,145 --> 00:11:11,944 Uh, yeah, no, he's... he's fine. 314 00:11:12,013 --> 00:11:13,813 He can... He can sleep through anything. 315 00:11:13,882 --> 00:11:16,783 So... what's your song? 316 00:11:16,851 --> 00:11:19,052 Oh, I-I don't know if I can get up there alone. 317 00:11:19,154 --> 00:11:21,387 Oh. I got you. 318 00:11:21,456 --> 00:11:24,200 Why don't we, uh, do... "Crazy in Love"? 319 00:11:24,225 --> 00:11:25,558 It's a great duet. 320 00:11:25,626 --> 00:11:27,560 Plus, we'll put our own little twist on it, 321 00:11:27,628 --> 00:11:29,194 and I'll do all the Beyoncé parts. 322 00:11:30,431 --> 00:11:32,798 Junior. I'm not feeling so good. 323 00:11:32,867 --> 00:11:34,567 Well, get Diane to take you back. 324 00:11:34,669 --> 00:11:35,968 I am working here! 325 00:11:36,037 --> 00:11:38,798 She already left. She's worse than I am. 326 00:11:38,823 --> 00:11:40,590 She ralphed in one of the plants. 327 00:11:40,625 --> 00:11:42,592 It's okay if your brother's sick and you need to go. 328 00:11:42,694 --> 00:11:43,793 Nah, he's fine. 329 00:11:43,862 --> 00:11:46,481 Just start practicing saying "So crazy." 330 00:11:48,533 --> 00:11:51,352 Go back to the room and choke down a ginger ale. 331 00:11:51,377 --> 00:11:52,743 - From the minibar? - Yes! 332 00:11:52,812 --> 00:11:54,147 Dad'll kill us. 333 00:11:54,172 --> 00:11:55,573 Please take me back. 334 00:11:56,741 --> 00:11:58,040 All right. 335 00:11:59,057 --> 00:12:00,011 You know what? 336 00:12:00,011 --> 00:12:03,448 Why don't we, uh, take this back to my semi-private patio? 337 00:12:03,473 --> 00:12:05,040 - We've got... - Just find me tomorrow. 338 00:12:06,176 --> 00:12:09,404 What... No, no. I-I can save this. 339 00:12:09,429 --> 00:12:11,696 He's... He's fine. He's doing... He's doing great. 340 00:12:14,724 --> 00:12:15,743 Jack? 341 00:12:15,768 --> 00:12:17,061 Bow and I finally had 342 00:12:17,100 --> 00:12:19,871 a real vacation moment at Club Coronado, 343 00:12:19,939 --> 00:12:22,206 and the next day, we tried to stay in it. 344 00:12:22,267 --> 00:12:24,385 Last night was so much fun, Dre. 345 00:12:24,410 --> 00:12:25,776 I don't remember the last time 346 00:12:25,845 --> 00:12:27,411 that I saw you do the Running Man. 347 00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:28,646 - Wow. - Yeah! 348 00:12:28,714 --> 00:12:29,680 - I did that? - Ooh! 349 00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:31,348 Oh, well, somebody had some fun. 350 00:12:31,450 --> 00:12:32,883 Oh, we had a ball. 351 00:12:32,952 --> 00:12:34,834 - Here comes the tall one. - Oh, God. 352 00:12:34,921 --> 00:12:37,822 Guys, I don't think the twins are getting any better. 353 00:12:37,891 --> 00:12:39,858 Didn't I see Jack at breakfast this morning? 354 00:12:44,881 --> 00:12:48,476 He ruined $100 worth of eggs. 355 00:12:48,535 --> 00:12:49,634 Pbbbbbbht. 356 00:12:49,703 --> 00:12:51,496 And I checked up on Diane, 357 00:12:51,521 --> 00:12:53,087 and she was too weak to insult me. 358 00:12:53,156 --> 00:12:55,890 Jack and Diane just have a cold. 359 00:12:55,959 --> 00:12:56,858 You got this. 360 00:12:56,926 --> 00:12:58,160 - But... - No buts! 361 00:12:58,185 --> 00:12:59,804 Junior... 362 00:13:00,254 --> 00:13:02,924 I go to the hospital, and I work my ass off, 363 00:13:02,949 --> 00:13:04,415 and then I come back home, 364 00:13:04,483 --> 00:13:06,684 and I work my ass off for you kids, 365 00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:08,085 but you know what? 366 00:13:08,154 --> 00:13:11,232 My ass is done working itself off. 367 00:13:11,824 --> 00:13:13,557 Damn it, I love you. 368 00:13:13,626 --> 00:13:14,558 - Hey, babe? - Hmm? 369 00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:16,026 Should we go to the restaurant tonight 370 00:13:16,095 --> 00:13:18,489 and spend stupid amounts of money on each other? 371 00:13:19,949 --> 00:13:21,348 Seafood tower? 372 00:13:21,618 --> 00:13:23,351 And truffle mac and cheese. 373 00:13:23,420 --> 00:13:25,353 Boom! Sorry, Junior. You're watching the kids. 374 00:13:25,455 --> 00:13:28,324 Tonight, Daddy's gonna get indigestion. 375 00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:30,916 And Mommy's gonna feed Daddy Tums 376 00:13:31,018 --> 00:13:32,879 like they're grapes. 377 00:13:34,388 --> 00:13:36,522 - Begone! - Au revoir! 378 00:13:36,966 --> 00:13:40,467 Our romantic adult dinner did not disappoint. 379 00:13:40,536 --> 00:13:43,504 We were making the most of our quality time together. 380 00:13:43,606 --> 00:13:45,105 - Oh, hey, babe. - What? 381 00:13:45,174 --> 00:13:47,141 - Directly behind you... - Okay. 382 00:13:47,243 --> 00:13:49,843 ...there is a sister-wife situation. 383 00:13:49,945 --> 00:13:51,556 - Stop it, Dre. - Turn around. 384 00:13:51,581 --> 00:13:53,548 Okay. Hold on. Ready? Right behind, right? 385 00:13:55,552 --> 00:13:57,285 Mm. Oh... 386 00:13:57,387 --> 00:13:58,820 - Mm? - No. 387 00:13:58,888 --> 00:13:59,987 - What? - No. 388 00:14:00,090 --> 00:14:02,156 That is a husband, a wife, and a daughter. 389 00:14:02,225 --> 00:14:06,094 Fathers don't feed daughters oysters, Bow. 390 00:14:07,230 --> 00:14:08,896 Oh, my God. 391 00:14:08,998 --> 00:14:10,867 Oh, my God. 392 00:14:10,892 --> 00:14:13,077 I'm enjoying you so much right now. 393 00:14:13,102 --> 00:14:15,736 Oh, baby, I know. This is uncut Bow/Dre magic. 394 00:14:15,838 --> 00:14:17,238 - Yes, it is. - Ohh. 395 00:14:17,306 --> 00:14:19,907 Makes me want to cut it into rocks and sell it near a school. 396 00:14:21,277 --> 00:14:22,510 - Hey, babe. - Yeah? 397 00:14:22,612 --> 00:14:24,078 - Let's run away. - Ooh. 398 00:14:24,147 --> 00:14:26,480 Let's go on one of those trips we've always planned on going to 399 00:14:26,549 --> 00:14:27,715 but never got around to doing. 400 00:14:27,784 --> 00:14:29,811 You know what? Let's go to Paris. 401 00:14:31,646 --> 00:14:32,779 Yes. 402 00:14:32,848 --> 00:14:34,180 - Oui? - Oui, oui. 403 00:14:35,450 --> 00:14:37,517 We can plan it for our next Christmas break. 404 00:14:37,586 --> 00:14:38,651 Are you kidding me? Oh, my God. 405 00:14:38,720 --> 00:14:40,253 We could do New Year's Eve at the Eiffel Tower. 406 00:14:40,322 --> 00:14:42,188 Can you imagine Devante with a little beret? 407 00:14:42,257 --> 00:14:43,723 Stop it right now. Close every door. 408 00:14:43,825 --> 00:14:44,924 - No. No. - What? 409 00:14:45,026 --> 00:14:46,569 - Let's go now. - What? 410 00:14:46,594 --> 00:14:48,227 Because if we plan it, w-we'll put it off 411 00:14:48,329 --> 00:14:50,529 and keep waiting until Devante's out of the house. 412 00:14:50,598 --> 00:14:52,750 By then, we'll be my parents' age. 413 00:14:53,701 --> 00:14:55,668 Let's go to Paris next weekend. 414 00:14:55,753 --> 00:14:57,086 Just you and me. 415 00:14:57,296 --> 00:14:59,897 No water slides, no... no butter noodles, 416 00:14:59,999 --> 00:15:03,219 no negotiating an hour here and there. 417 00:15:03,803 --> 00:15:05,502 Come on, Bow. What do you say? 418 00:15:07,239 --> 00:15:08,605 We can't do that. 419 00:15:08,630 --> 00:15:09,573 What? 420 00:15:09,675 --> 00:15:11,275 Dre, I wish it was that easy, 421 00:15:11,377 --> 00:15:13,310 but we don't have that kind of life. 422 00:15:13,412 --> 00:15:15,779 Yes, we do have that kind of life. 423 00:15:15,881 --> 00:15:16,983 Mm... 424 00:15:17,859 --> 00:15:18,959 no, we don't. 425 00:15:19,061 --> 00:15:20,737 Okay, well, let's make it... 426 00:15:21,330 --> 00:15:23,396 Okay. I'm just, uh... 427 00:15:23,498 --> 00:15:24,664 I have a filet for the lady. 428 00:15:24,766 --> 00:15:27,067 - T-Thank you so much. Thank you. - There you go. 429 00:15:27,169 --> 00:15:28,401 - And for the gentleman... - You know what? 430 00:15:28,503 --> 00:15:30,270 I've, uh... 431 00:15:30,372 --> 00:15:32,723 - I've suddenly lost my appetite. - Uh... 432 00:15:33,642 --> 00:15:36,124 Uh, please send my French fries to the pool. 433 00:15:45,370 --> 00:15:47,378 Hello, man-baby. 434 00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:50,831 I'm sorry I left. 435 00:15:52,555 --> 00:15:53,921 How was your steak? 436 00:15:55,855 --> 00:15:57,354 I dropped it on the ground. 437 00:15:58,891 --> 00:16:01,492 And they sent my fries to another pool. 438 00:16:06,032 --> 00:16:09,033 I would love to go to Paris with you. 439 00:16:09,101 --> 00:16:12,002 And I love that you made such a romantic gesture. 440 00:16:12,163 --> 00:16:14,029 But going away, just the two of us... 441 00:16:14,098 --> 00:16:16,042 it feels selfish. 442 00:16:17,402 --> 00:16:19,668 It... 443 00:16:20,129 --> 00:16:22,229 - We both love our kids. - Mm-hmm. 444 00:16:22,331 --> 00:16:25,305 And we love spending time all together. 445 00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:29,763 But it's not selfish to want some alone time as a couple. 446 00:16:29,831 --> 00:16:32,298 I know, Dre, but I already deal with so much guilt 447 00:16:32,367 --> 00:16:34,601 when I'm away from the kids even if it's for work. 448 00:16:34,703 --> 00:16:35,835 Why? 449 00:16:36,145 --> 00:16:37,745 Our kids need us to work, 450 00:16:37,847 --> 00:16:39,613 and I don't feel guilt because of that. 451 00:16:39,682 --> 00:16:41,496 Because you're not a working mother. 452 00:16:42,551 --> 00:16:44,885 Dre, please, try to understand. 453 00:16:44,954 --> 00:16:47,855 When I go to work, it feels like me time. 454 00:16:47,923 --> 00:16:51,194 So when I spend any other time away from the kids, 455 00:16:51,219 --> 00:16:54,621 even if it's with you, it just feels selfish. 456 00:16:54,723 --> 00:16:57,157 Look, I love that after 20 years, 457 00:16:57,225 --> 00:16:58,391 you still get upset 458 00:16:58,493 --> 00:17:02,128 that we don't spend enough time alone together. 459 00:17:02,421 --> 00:17:04,188 And we will go to Paris. 460 00:17:04,590 --> 00:17:06,926 I just need you to meet me halfway. 461 00:17:08,010 --> 00:17:09,137 Atlanta? 462 00:17:09,303 --> 00:17:10,636 Oh, my God. 463 00:17:10,738 --> 00:17:13,005 Your jokes are so bad. 464 00:17:13,107 --> 00:17:14,773 No, babe, we're gonna go to Paris, 465 00:17:14,875 --> 00:17:16,141 but we got to bring the kids. 466 00:17:16,210 --> 00:17:17,643 And then we can just promise each other 467 00:17:17,745 --> 00:17:22,147 that we're gonna get two dinners alone. 468 00:17:22,249 --> 00:17:23,448 Can the kids fly coach? 469 00:17:23,550 --> 00:17:25,617 I mean, they don't even have to sit together. 470 00:17:25,686 --> 00:17:27,953 They can all have middle seats, for all I care. 471 00:17:28,055 --> 00:17:30,856 Okay. Well, then, Paris, here we come. 472 00:17:31,409 --> 00:17:34,944 But in the meantime, why don't we go back up to the room, 473 00:17:35,013 --> 00:17:37,180 slip into something a little more comfortable... 474 00:17:37,249 --> 00:17:38,948 - Okay. - ...and... 475 00:17:39,017 --> 00:17:40,350 watch "Madam Secretary"? 476 00:17:40,585 --> 00:17:42,118 Did you know that in this country, 477 00:17:42,220 --> 00:17:45,388 they call it "Señora Gobierna"? 478 00:17:45,457 --> 00:17:46,623 Mm! 479 00:17:46,692 --> 00:17:49,059 I'm gonna give you a five-second head start to the room. 480 00:17:49,161 --> 00:17:49,926 - Really? - Mm-hmm. 481 00:17:50,028 --> 00:17:51,088 - Okay. - Starting now. 482 00:17:51,113 --> 00:17:52,133 Starting now. One... 483 00:17:52,158 --> 00:17:53,090 - Five... - Mm-hmm. 484 00:17:53,115 --> 00:17:53,957 ...four... 485 00:17:53,982 --> 00:17:55,216 - Excuse me, sir. - ...three... 486 00:17:55,241 --> 00:17:56,092 - Excuse me. - ...two... 487 00:17:56,117 --> 00:17:57,060 - Oh. - ...one. 488 00:17:57,085 --> 00:17:58,659 Too late! I got you! 489 00:18:00,596 --> 00:18:03,430 Whew. Feel like a whole new man. 490 00:18:03,649 --> 00:18:05,482 Thanks for taking such good care of me, Junior. 491 00:18:09,363 --> 00:18:11,396 I didn't know my eyes could shiver. 492 00:18:11,465 --> 00:18:13,398 Oh, no. You're sick? 493 00:18:13,500 --> 00:18:16,101 You sneezed in my mouth! 494 00:18:17,471 --> 00:18:21,200 Oh, wait, wait, Jack, just... please, just stay with me. 495 00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:24,026 Eh, put something simple on the TV. 496 00:18:24,095 --> 00:18:26,161 I wonder what Bob and Abishola are up to. 497 00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:27,529 Well, I would love to, 498 00:18:27,598 --> 00:18:29,765 but Diane said the buffet has unlimited chicken fingers, 499 00:18:29,867 --> 00:18:31,500 so you do the math. 500 00:18:31,569 --> 00:18:33,335 I stayed with you. 501 00:18:33,437 --> 00:18:35,237 I cared for you. 502 00:18:35,306 --> 00:18:39,176 I turned down a moonlit walk on the beach with Lily 503 00:18:39,201 --> 00:18:40,828 to be by your side! 504 00:18:40,828 --> 00:18:42,728 Well, that's on you, playboy. 505 00:18:43,606 --> 00:18:46,709 Well, eh, before you leave, I mean... 506 00:18:46,709 --> 00:18:47,941 can you at least... 507 00:18:50,246 --> 00:18:52,680 I'm gonna sneeze on his toothbrush. 508 00:18:53,983 --> 00:18:56,717 Most of us don't take enough time away, 509 00:18:56,819 --> 00:18:58,052 which is a shame, 510 00:18:58,120 --> 00:19:00,156 because you can learn a lot about yourself. 511 00:19:00,211 --> 00:19:02,222 Oh, hey. Johnsons, checking out. 512 00:19:02,291 --> 00:19:05,259 Jet Skis and buffets? I think I found my brand. 513 00:19:05,361 --> 00:19:06,593 I'm this guy now. 514 00:19:06,662 --> 00:19:09,063 I'm just glad I talked you out of getting your hair braided. 515 00:19:11,767 --> 00:19:15,469 I just don't understand why we couldn't have used that cart. 516 00:19:15,571 --> 00:19:16,737 Andre. 517 00:19:17,707 --> 00:19:19,540 I'm glad I caught you before you left. 518 00:19:19,608 --> 00:19:20,941 I know it didn't work out here, 519 00:19:21,010 --> 00:19:23,243 but maybe we could get together sometime. 520 00:19:23,604 --> 00:19:25,371 Yeah. I'm... I'm down. 521 00:19:25,623 --> 00:19:26,956 You live in South LA, right? 522 00:19:27,025 --> 00:19:28,858 Yep. Southern Louisiana. 523 00:19:29,709 --> 00:19:31,981 But my mom caught my dad sexting his periodontist, 524 00:19:32,035 --> 00:19:34,063 so he's taking all of us to Disneyland next summer. 525 00:19:34,165 --> 00:19:35,264 Really? 526 00:19:35,366 --> 00:19:36,499 Yeah. 527 00:19:39,037 --> 00:19:40,603 Hot Boy Next Summer. 528 00:19:40,705 --> 00:19:42,554 Mm! Let's go. 529 00:19:42,609 --> 00:19:45,141 So, we can surf the 5-foot swells 10 minutes from here, 530 00:19:45,210 --> 00:19:48,329 but there's 8-foot swells 20 minutes from here. 531 00:19:48,354 --> 00:19:50,420 When we agreed to make surfing our thing, 532 00:19:50,489 --> 00:19:53,023 the deal was you weren't gonna get all "Lewis" about it. 533 00:19:53,092 --> 00:19:55,893 I don't know what that means. Why would you say that? 534 00:19:55,995 --> 00:19:59,329 And what we learned was that we can have a wonderful time, 535 00:19:59,431 --> 00:20:02,165 both alone and with our kids. 536 00:20:02,268 --> 00:20:04,935 You ready to get back to the grind? 537 00:20:05,037 --> 00:20:06,870 It's not so bad. 538 00:20:06,972 --> 00:20:09,306 Thank you for your stay, Dr. and Mr. Johnson. 539 00:20:09,408 --> 00:20:11,074 Would you like to purchase the robes and towels 540 00:20:11,176 --> 00:20:13,010 that the staff reported missing from your room? 541 00:20:13,112 --> 00:20:16,113 You might want to charge us for a pair of slippers, too. 542 00:20:16,215 --> 00:20:18,115 We also took those. 543 00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:19,716 Hey, hey, hey. 544 00:20:19,818 --> 00:20:20,918 After you, Doctor. 545 00:20:21,020 --> 00:20:22,352 - Oh, you got that? - Mm-hmm. 546 00:20:22,454 --> 00:20:23,420 Mm. 547 00:20:29,478 --> 00:20:31,288 Welcome back, Dre. Boy, did we miss you. 548 00:20:31,313 --> 00:20:34,787 We had to name a Black character in an ad we were doing, 549 00:20:34,850 --> 00:20:36,865 and Josh got a little loose with it. 550 00:20:36,960 --> 00:20:41,811 Uh... Jerome, Tookie, and, uh... De'Nickashaw. 551 00:20:41,882 --> 00:20:43,818 I don't know any better. 552 00:20:43,843 --> 00:20:45,476 Hey, how was your trip? 553 00:20:45,554 --> 00:20:47,410 Love hearing about family vacations. 554 00:20:47,473 --> 00:20:49,049 Never got to go on one. 555 00:20:49,082 --> 00:20:51,324 Oh, uh, my family vacation was great. 556 00:20:51,402 --> 00:20:54,648 Yeah, I got to spend some good quality time with my family. 557 00:20:54,673 --> 00:20:55,756 Good. Nice. 558 00:20:55,781 --> 00:20:57,783 Well, it sounds like a well-earned break. 559 00:20:57,817 --> 00:20:59,648 Ah, hey! Lucy! 560 00:20:59,719 --> 00:21:02,148 - You work here again? - Yeah. I'm back. 561 00:21:02,180 --> 00:21:04,817 Yeah. Um, about that. 562 00:21:04,851 --> 00:21:06,652 Now that Dre's here, 563 00:21:06,686 --> 00:21:10,557 we no longer need, um, an "other," so... 564 00:21:10,590 --> 00:21:11,891 Well... 565 00:21:11,923 --> 00:21:13,160 lawsuit's back on. 566 00:21:15,527 --> 00:21:16,962 I just have to say, working with you guys 567 00:21:16,996 --> 00:21:18,454 has been a complete disaster, 568 00:21:18,524 --> 00:21:22,344 and I hope you die and have shallow graves! 569 00:21:22,394 --> 00:21:23,663 She seems good.