1 00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:01,406 Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie www.addic7ed.com 2 00:00:08,404 --> 00:00:09,421 Hey, Mom. 3 00:00:09,481 --> 00:00:11,312 Oh, honey, thanks for picking up the rest 4 00:00:11,337 --> 00:00:13,750 - of the wedding party things. - You're welcome. 5 00:00:13,775 --> 00:00:16,117 Did they give you any hassle about the coupons? 6 00:00:16,142 --> 00:00:18,484 I didn't use them. It was too embarrassing. 7 00:00:18,509 --> 00:00:20,367 Honey... Honey... 8 00:00:20,875 --> 00:00:23,515 I spent all day cutting those out. 9 00:00:23,716 --> 00:00:25,562 Oh, God, look at the time. 10 00:00:26,062 --> 00:00:28,062 I gotta get ready. I look like a nut! 11 00:00:28,087 --> 00:00:30,398 Ken's gonna be here, and I look crazy. 12 00:00:31,005 --> 00:00:32,296 Honey, what do you think? 13 00:00:32,321 --> 00:00:34,453 Put one of these on the piano? 14 00:00:36,102 --> 00:00:37,756 Oh, you got a piano. 15 00:00:37,781 --> 00:00:39,475 - Yes. - That's fun. 16 00:00:39,500 --> 00:00:41,554 Came with the, uh, jazz trio. 17 00:00:42,493 --> 00:00:45,203 You know, I'm going to walk down the aisle to Coltrane. 18 00:00:45,228 --> 00:00:46,238 Oh, that's nice. 19 00:00:46,263 --> 00:00:47,909 Yeah, Ken picked it out. 20 00:00:47,934 --> 00:00:49,006 It seems right, 21 00:00:49,031 --> 00:00:50,070 - you know? - Mm-hmm. 22 00:00:50,095 --> 00:00:51,828 Ah, speak of the devil. 23 00:00:53,414 --> 00:00:54,773 Ken? 24 00:00:54,798 --> 00:00:56,070 Are you on the plane, honey? 25 00:00:56,095 --> 00:01:00,099 Well, about that, Christine, um, I missed my flight. 26 00:01:00,124 --> 00:01:03,092 This carpet recall thing is taking a lot longer than I thought. 27 00:01:03,117 --> 00:01:04,858 Oh, honey, I'm sorry. 28 00:01:04,883 --> 00:01:07,381 Bottom line is I'm on the last flight, 29 00:01:07,406 --> 00:01:09,506 and I don't know if it'll even get me there on time. 30 00:01:09,531 --> 00:01:11,405 I'm thinking maybe once I'm on the flight, 31 00:01:11,430 --> 00:01:12,631 I could buy Internet, 32 00:01:12,656 --> 00:01:15,475 and we could Skype to each other and, 33 00:01:16,048 --> 00:01:18,061 I don't know, maybe we can, uh, 34 00:01:18,235 --> 00:01:21,534 exchange vows over Skype. 35 00:01:21,559 --> 00:01:22,999 - I-I don't know. - Oh, honey, 36 00:01:23,024 --> 00:01:25,131 that never works on a plane. You know? 37 00:01:25,156 --> 00:01:26,959 That's not gonna work out at all. 38 00:01:28,109 --> 00:01:29,499 Well... 39 00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:32,827 Uh... 40 00:01:33,828 --> 00:01:35,022 You know what, honey? 41 00:01:36,550 --> 00:01:38,651 We can get married anytime. 42 00:01:39,190 --> 00:01:41,389 It sounds like you're really needed there. 43 00:01:41,414 --> 00:01:42,846 I want you to stay there. 44 00:01:42,871 --> 00:01:44,532 I mean, are you sure? 45 00:01:44,557 --> 00:01:46,337 I mean, really, are you okay with that? 46 00:01:46,362 --> 00:01:47,376 You know what? 47 00:01:47,401 --> 00:01:50,066 I'll change this into a housewarming party, honey. 48 00:01:50,091 --> 00:01:52,550 - Oh, Christine. - You know, what's the difference? 49 00:01:52,575 --> 00:01:54,872 Honey, I wanted you to have your special wedding, 50 00:01:54,897 --> 00:01:56,345 like we planned. 51 00:01:56,370 --> 00:01:59,127 Oh, honey, I have you, and that's all I want. 52 00:01:59,856 --> 00:02:01,690 You take care of that, and... 53 00:02:02,348 --> 00:02:03,881 it'll all work out. 54 00:02:03,906 --> 00:02:05,823 Christine, you are amazing, baby. 55 00:02:05,944 --> 00:02:07,940 - Have a good housewarming. - Take care. 56 00:02:07,965 --> 00:02:09,626 Good luck with the recall, honey. 57 00:02:09,651 --> 00:02:11,714 - Love you, my bride. - Love you. 58 00:02:13,409 --> 00:02:14,846 I'm sorry, Mom. 59 00:02:14,871 --> 00:02:16,142 Oh. 60 00:02:16,620 --> 00:02:18,620 Things happen, honey, in life. 61 00:02:19,095 --> 00:02:20,270 You okay? 62 00:02:21,116 --> 00:02:22,159 Yeah. 63 00:02:22,184 --> 00:02:23,386 Okay, good. 64 00:02:23,768 --> 00:02:25,659 Well, since there's no wedding, I guess I'll get 65 00:02:25,684 --> 00:02:27,338 an early start on my gig at the hospital, 66 00:02:27,363 --> 00:02:29,214 - if that's okay. - Yeah. 67 00:02:29,239 --> 00:02:31,474 Hey, honey, I'm really glad you're doing that. 68 00:02:31,499 --> 00:02:33,027 You really cheer those kids up. 69 00:02:33,052 --> 00:02:35,230 They really need something like that right now. 70 00:02:35,255 --> 00:02:37,659 And you're good at it, and you're an artist, honey. 71 00:02:37,956 --> 00:02:39,706 Thanks, Mom. Thank you. 72 00:02:44,683 --> 00:02:45,771 Hi. 73 00:02:46,949 --> 00:02:47,964 Hey, Doctor. 74 00:02:47,989 --> 00:02:49,003 Hey, patient. 75 00:02:50,167 --> 00:02:51,488 Hello, Nurse. 76 00:02:52,014 --> 00:02:53,091 Afternoon to you... 77 00:03:02,066 --> 00:03:04,136 Hello, Tyler! 78 00:03:04,558 --> 00:03:06,017 How are you? 79 00:03:06,042 --> 00:03:08,034 Well, I'm in the hospital, so... 80 00:03:13,889 --> 00:03:14,889 Hello? 81 00:03:15,151 --> 00:03:17,683 Yeah, she's here. I'll let you talk to her. 82 00:03:18,347 --> 00:03:19,511 Banana phone. 83 00:03:19,917 --> 00:03:21,418 Well, I have an actual phone. 84 00:03:21,443 --> 00:03:22,443 Okay. 85 00:03:22,898 --> 00:03:24,042 All right. 86 00:03:24,067 --> 00:03:25,995 Uh, I left something down in the basement. 87 00:03:26,020 --> 00:03:27,886 I'm gonna go get it. I'll be right back. 88 00:03:30,184 --> 00:03:31,777 Something in the basement. Oh, I found it. 89 00:03:33,289 --> 00:03:35,300 I know it's not actual water, 90 00:03:35,325 --> 00:03:37,111 I've seen the Harlem Globetrotters. 91 00:03:37,604 --> 00:03:39,027 You can go now. 92 00:03:40,599 --> 00:03:42,120 Your smart-ass attitude is not going to get you 93 00:03:42,145 --> 00:03:43,293 into a good college. 94 00:03:44,122 --> 00:03:45,504 - Yeah, hello? - Hey, Chip. 95 00:03:45,529 --> 00:03:46,558 What's that? 96 00:03:47,980 --> 00:03:48,980 Yeah. 97 00:03:49,005 --> 00:03:50,245 Hey, Chip. How you doing? 98 00:03:50,785 --> 00:03:52,424 Actually, I'm having a tricky time 99 00:03:52,449 --> 00:03:53,745 with my grief clowning. 100 00:03:54,123 --> 00:03:56,909 - Oh, this kid is tricky. - Listen, Chip, 101 00:03:56,934 --> 00:03:58,892 I just wanted to check in to make sure 102 00:03:58,917 --> 00:04:00,501 that your mom isn't still upset 103 00:04:00,526 --> 00:04:02,331 about me not being there for the wedding. 104 00:04:02,546 --> 00:04:04,886 - Well, she-she seems fine. - Really? 105 00:04:04,911 --> 00:04:06,976 Now, you would tell me, Chip, if she wasn't? 106 00:04:07,001 --> 00:04:09,423 I mean, she's not just putting on a brave face? 107 00:04:09,448 --> 00:04:11,276 Yeah, I'd tell you. I'm not a good liar. 108 00:04:11,301 --> 00:04:13,196 - Actually, that's a lie. - Well, you know 109 00:04:13,221 --> 00:04:15,344 - I would be there if I could. - Yeah, I know that. 110 00:04:15,369 --> 00:04:17,312 Amanda! Why are you still here? 111 00:04:17,337 --> 00:04:19,344 You should be on your way to Boulder! 112 00:04:21,270 --> 00:04:22,270 Chip, I gotta go. 113 00:04:22,295 --> 00:04:23,430 Yeah, I gotta go, too. I gotta get back 114 00:04:23,455 --> 00:04:25,327 - to my clowning emergency. - Yeah, well, 115 00:04:25,352 --> 00:04:27,227 good luck with your clowning emergency. 116 00:04:27,252 --> 00:04:28,555 Okay, bye. 117 00:04:31,243 --> 00:04:32,391 Thank you. 118 00:04:35,579 --> 00:04:36,868 Oh, God. 119 00:04:36,893 --> 00:04:38,493 Well, it's really the same thing. 120 00:04:38,518 --> 00:04:40,562 It's just gonna be a housewarming now. 121 00:04:40,587 --> 00:04:42,782 Yeah, o-okay, no problem. 122 00:04:43,548 --> 00:04:44,860 D-Do you need to talk about this? 123 00:04:44,885 --> 00:04:47,180 - It-it-it seems like a lot. - No. 124 00:04:47,205 --> 00:04:50,233 But please come to the housewarming and have some 125 00:04:50,258 --> 00:04:52,335 delicious housewarming cake. 126 00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:55,204 Oh, Christine, you must be crushed. 127 00:04:55,229 --> 00:04:58,016 For what? Ken just had a carpet emergency. 128 00:04:58,041 --> 00:05:01,165 Well, my ex-husband had a carpet emergency, too. 129 00:05:01,432 --> 00:05:03,266 She was 26 years old. 130 00:05:03,291 --> 00:05:05,710 No, Carol. What-what I don't think you understand is, 131 00:05:05,735 --> 00:05:07,883 I don't need the jazz trio. 132 00:05:07,908 --> 00:05:10,860 And it's gonna be $67.50 for the cramp medicine, 133 00:05:10,885 --> 00:05:13,749 cigarettes, adult diapers, nicotine gum, please. 134 00:05:13,774 --> 00:05:15,391 You still smoking and chewing the nicotine gum 135 00:05:15,416 --> 00:05:16,540 at the same time, Fred? 136 00:05:16,565 --> 00:05:18,616 What's going on with you? Thanks so much. 137 00:05:18,641 --> 00:05:19,929 Have a good one, buddy. 138 00:05:21,080 --> 00:05:22,969 Not during business hours, Mama. 139 00:05:23,254 --> 00:05:24,254 Stanley. 140 00:05:24,471 --> 00:05:27,173 I've been giving you free Internet for-for way too long. 141 00:05:27,198 --> 00:05:30,101 I'd say to the tune of about 500 smackeroos. Okay? 142 00:05:30,126 --> 00:05:31,615 I need to get a wedding gift for my mom. 143 00:05:31,640 --> 00:05:32,696 What do you got for me? 144 00:05:32,883 --> 00:05:36,024 Well, I got a golf cart that used to belong to Gary Busey. 145 00:05:36,049 --> 00:05:37,268 I got it at auction. 146 00:05:37,293 --> 00:05:39,462 Gary Busey? Hmm. 147 00:05:40,076 --> 00:05:42,555 My mom did love that Buddy Hollymovie he was in. 148 00:05:42,580 --> 00:05:43,790 She loves golf carts. 149 00:05:43,815 --> 00:05:45,516 It's a very practical gift. 150 00:05:45,541 --> 00:05:47,409 I'll throw in a fox-fur lap blanket. 151 00:05:47,434 --> 00:05:48,829 Done deal, I'll take 'em both. 152 00:05:48,993 --> 00:05:51,337 Wonderful, thanks so much. Next! 153 00:05:51,568 --> 00:05:52,821 How you doing, Cotton? 154 00:05:53,337 --> 00:05:55,946 Okay, where were we? Oh, yeah, I remember. 155 00:05:57,416 --> 00:05:59,157 - Hey! - Oh, let me get that off of you. 156 00:05:59,697 --> 00:06:02,171 - What's your problem? - Let me help you get that off... 157 00:06:02,196 --> 00:06:03,579 Hey, stop! 158 00:06:03,907 --> 00:06:05,514 - Isn't this funny? - You're not funny! 159 00:06:05,539 --> 00:06:07,415 - Well, I just... it's just... - I'm gonna call the nurse. 160 00:06:07,440 --> 00:06:08,835 Why? Don't call... Please don't call the nurse. 161 00:06:08,860 --> 00:06:10,524 - Nurse, please come in. - Nur... okay, 162 00:06:10,549 --> 00:06:11,549 - don't call the... no nurses. - Nurses' station. 163 00:06:11,574 --> 00:06:14,237 - What do you need? - There's a scary hobo in my room. 164 00:06:14,262 --> 00:06:16,009 I'm not a ho... I'm a clown. 165 00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:18,624 I-I'm a clown. This is a costume. 166 00:06:18,649 --> 00:06:20,337 - Okay... - Forget it. 167 00:06:21,931 --> 00:06:24,002 Oh, my God. Are you okay? 168 00:06:29,447 --> 00:06:30,744 Yeah, I'll let you talk to her. 169 00:06:31,888 --> 00:06:32,939 Ew! 170 00:06:46,186 --> 00:06:47,736 How'd it go in the kids ward? 171 00:06:50,658 --> 00:06:52,384 I've had better shows. 172 00:06:53,470 --> 00:06:54,799 Yeah, it's tricky now, right? 173 00:06:54,957 --> 00:06:56,698 Uh, what do you mean? 174 00:06:57,155 --> 00:06:58,635 The kids these days. 175 00:06:58,882 --> 00:07:00,493 All they've seen in, like, movies, 176 00:07:00,518 --> 00:07:03,783 video games is all scary clowns, killer clowns. You know? 177 00:07:03,808 --> 00:07:07,594 Like the Joker and the, like, It. 178 00:07:07,619 --> 00:07:10,517 I mean, even in real life, like the... what's his name, 179 00:07:10,542 --> 00:07:13,252 John Wayne. Um, the murderer. 180 00:07:13,277 --> 00:07:14,277 He's a murderer, 181 00:07:14,302 --> 00:07:15,789 - and he wore clown makeup. - What? 182 00:07:15,814 --> 00:07:17,384 John Wayne was a clown? 183 00:07:17,409 --> 00:07:18,830 John Wayne Gacy. 184 00:07:19,090 --> 00:07:21,181 John Wayne Gacy. I think that's the airport. 185 00:07:21,206 --> 00:07:23,252 Is it? Doesn't matter. 186 00:07:23,277 --> 00:07:26,031 The fact is, you're in a world where no child 187 00:07:26,056 --> 00:07:30,736 has seen Bozo, and every child has seen murdering clowns. 188 00:07:30,761 --> 00:07:33,938 But I... I'm an old-fashioned clown. 189 00:07:33,963 --> 00:07:36,431 - I'm a traditionalist. - Yeah, you are. 190 00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:40,009 And that's why, like, I wear this for the other wards. 191 00:07:40,034 --> 00:07:42,564 Like, the old people who are, frankly, dying. 192 00:07:42,589 --> 00:07:44,611 But I got a new look for the kiddos. 193 00:07:45,485 --> 00:07:47,310 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, what are you doing? 194 00:07:47,335 --> 00:07:48,924 - Boom. - Oh, dear. 195 00:07:52,666 --> 00:07:54,703 - What are you, Pantyhose Man? - No. 196 00:07:54,728 --> 00:07:57,188 - Turtleneck Man? - I call it Spiderweb Man. 197 00:07:57,213 --> 00:07:59,071 - Spiderweb Man? - It's a superhero. 198 00:07:59,682 --> 00:08:01,760 They're based on the best of us. 199 00:08:01,785 --> 00:08:05,093 Right? Clowns are based on a homeless person. 200 00:08:05,338 --> 00:08:06,697 What are you talking about? 201 00:08:06,722 --> 00:08:08,955 Oh. I made this. 202 00:08:11,055 --> 00:08:12,055 Look. 203 00:08:12,705 --> 00:08:14,220 You can... you can borrow that. 204 00:08:14,377 --> 00:08:16,988 - Who is that, Mitt Romney? - No, it's Superhero Man. 205 00:08:17,101 --> 00:08:19,603 You put that on, kids are gonna go crazy. 206 00:08:20,752 --> 00:08:22,517 You'll get laughs. 207 00:08:23,527 --> 00:08:24,838 Remember those? 208 00:08:29,635 --> 00:08:32,892 Martha, thanks for coming in early to help. 209 00:08:32,975 --> 00:08:34,478 Really appreciate it. 210 00:08:34,503 --> 00:08:37,328 Sure, Mrs. Baskets. I want to be here for you 211 00:08:37,353 --> 00:08:38,625 in your time of need. 212 00:08:38,650 --> 00:08:42,516 - Is Chip coming? - Oh, I'm sure he is. 213 00:08:42,541 --> 00:08:45,244 But, you know, he is clowning at the hospital. 214 00:08:45,424 --> 00:08:47,701 Oh, I didn't realize he was clowning again. 215 00:08:47,726 --> 00:08:48,759 That's great. 216 00:08:48,784 --> 00:08:51,482 Oh, he didn't tell you? That surprises me. 217 00:08:51,955 --> 00:08:54,414 Well, he is so busy, it really doesn't surpri... 218 00:08:54,439 --> 00:08:56,299 Oh, God, this won't work. 219 00:08:56,502 --> 00:08:59,047 Martha, will you go get the Monopoly game 220 00:08:59,072 --> 00:09:00,299 in the game room? 221 00:09:00,324 --> 00:09:02,119 Sure. You have a game room? 222 00:09:02,144 --> 00:09:05,008 I do. It's right next to the gift-wrapping room. 223 00:09:05,572 --> 00:09:07,172 - Okay. - Christine! 224 00:09:07,197 --> 00:09:10,047 Oh, Jim! 225 00:09:10,072 --> 00:09:12,844 It's so good to see you. 226 00:09:12,869 --> 00:09:15,047 So, where-where's that schmuck who canceled on you, huh? 227 00:09:15,072 --> 00:09:17,924 - I'll kill him. - Oh, it's not like that, honey. 228 00:09:18,330 --> 00:09:20,820 He's very busy. He's got a lot of carpet returns. 229 00:09:20,853 --> 00:09:22,430 He's the Carpet King... He's got to take care 230 00:09:22,455 --> 00:09:23,484 - of business. - Yeah, well, I'll tell you, 231 00:09:23,509 --> 00:09:25,945 I would never cancel my own wedding, I'll tell you that. 232 00:09:25,970 --> 00:09:27,563 Will you stop it? You're a businessman. 233 00:09:27,588 --> 00:09:29,594 Of all people, you should know about this. 234 00:09:29,619 --> 00:09:30,984 This isn't business. 235 00:09:31,009 --> 00:09:32,220 This is a family wedding. 236 00:09:32,245 --> 00:09:35,168 - Mom! - Ah, my twins! 237 00:09:35,193 --> 00:09:36,368 Hey! 238 00:09:36,393 --> 00:09:38,102 - Mmm...! - Oh! 239 00:09:38,127 --> 00:09:40,651 What is that cologne? Is that your own brand? 240 00:09:40,676 --> 00:09:41,687 Yeah. 241 00:09:41,712 --> 00:09:44,479 Oh, I always wanted my own brand of something. 242 00:09:44,504 --> 00:09:46,680 - That's so great. - We're glad you like it. 243 00:09:46,858 --> 00:09:49,041 But, Mom, um, how you feeling? 244 00:09:49,066 --> 00:09:51,932 If someone canceled my wedding, I would be crying. 245 00:09:51,957 --> 00:09:54,090 It's not like that. Everything's okay. 246 00:09:54,115 --> 00:09:56,188 And I still want you to deejay. 247 00:09:56,213 --> 00:09:59,464 This is gonna be a fun housewarming, everyone. 248 00:09:59,489 --> 00:10:01,362 We don't want to raise the vibe in here 249 00:10:01,387 --> 00:10:03,885 if it's just a way for you to escape your feelings. 250 00:10:03,910 --> 00:10:06,395 - I'm fine. - Christine, listen to him. 251 00:10:06,420 --> 00:10:07,590 Don't be a martyr. 252 00:10:07,615 --> 00:10:09,061 This is my second marriage. 253 00:10:09,086 --> 00:10:10,305 I'm not a martyr. 254 00:10:10,330 --> 00:10:11,854 Everybody relax. 255 00:10:11,879 --> 00:10:13,543 Let's have a good time. 256 00:10:13,568 --> 00:10:16,025 All right? I want big smiles. 257 00:10:16,050 --> 00:10:17,840 - All right. - That's better. 258 00:10:17,865 --> 00:10:19,199 All right. 259 00:10:19,224 --> 00:10:20,996 So, what's up, Unc, how you been? 260 00:10:21,973 --> 00:10:23,348 How do you tell who's who? 261 00:10:25,942 --> 00:10:27,670 Look out...! 262 00:10:28,148 --> 00:10:29,440 Whoa! 263 00:10:29,465 --> 00:10:30,981 Hi. 264 00:10:31,801 --> 00:10:33,121 Oh, my God! 265 00:10:33,146 --> 00:10:35,065 Ah! Hi. How are you? 266 00:10:35,090 --> 00:10:36,879 Hi. I'm good. 267 00:10:36,904 --> 00:10:38,059 I'll do something else, okay? 268 00:10:38,084 --> 00:10:39,324 - Uh... - Okay. 269 00:10:41,098 --> 00:10:42,737 You like that? See my big muscles? 270 00:10:42,762 --> 00:10:43,762 Here you go. 271 00:10:45,435 --> 00:10:46,882 Can you do more? 272 00:10:46,907 --> 00:10:48,386 Uh... 273 00:10:50,192 --> 00:10:52,237 You know what? I can't... I can't, uh... 274 00:10:52,262 --> 00:10:56,369 - You again? - Yes, Tyler, it is me again, yes. 275 00:10:56,394 --> 00:10:58,317 I just, uh, was trying to entertain you... 276 00:10:58,342 --> 00:11:00,153 Put the mask back on and do it again. 277 00:11:00,178 --> 00:11:02,707 Uh, you know, this-this character's not talking to me. 278 00:11:02,732 --> 00:11:04,114 I-I don't know what to do with him... 279 00:11:04,139 --> 00:11:05,457 Put it on! 280 00:11:06,796 --> 00:11:08,395 Look, Tyler... 281 00:11:08,829 --> 00:11:10,418 I'm just trying to find some... 282 00:11:10,443 --> 00:11:13,387 some good through my art, some meaning. 283 00:11:13,762 --> 00:11:15,760 You know? And as a clown, I can find that meaning. 284 00:11:15,785 --> 00:11:17,254 And dressed like this... 285 00:11:17,871 --> 00:11:21,878 I-I just... I can't even believe I'm having an existential crisis 286 00:11:21,903 --> 00:11:23,382 in front of a six-year-old. 287 00:11:23,796 --> 00:11:24,988 I'm 12. 288 00:11:25,547 --> 00:11:26,547 Oh. 289 00:11:26,706 --> 00:11:28,378 Well, no wonder you don't like clowns. 290 00:11:28,714 --> 00:11:31,230 My-my-my point being is that... 291 00:11:31,738 --> 00:11:33,111 you shouldn't judge a book by its cover. 292 00:11:33,136 --> 00:11:34,800 Just 'cause a-a guy's dressed as a clown 293 00:11:34,825 --> 00:11:36,738 doesn't mean he doesn't have something to offer. 294 00:11:37,449 --> 00:11:38,894 And just 'cause someone is a superhero, 295 00:11:38,919 --> 00:11:40,496 it doesn't mean that they're super. 296 00:11:41,613 --> 00:11:43,137 Okay? 297 00:11:43,269 --> 00:11:44,777 That's all I want to say. 298 00:11:45,464 --> 00:11:47,542 And thanks a lot for ruining my month. 299 00:11:47,567 --> 00:11:49,730 Wha... I'm the one in the hospital. 300 00:11:54,606 --> 00:11:56,011 That's not music. 301 00:11:57,496 --> 00:12:00,658 Well, but sometimes giving a sermon's kind of like 302 00:12:00,683 --> 00:12:02,025 - doing a HALO jump... - Christine. 303 00:12:02,050 --> 00:12:03,529 - What? - I'm worried about you. 304 00:12:03,554 --> 00:12:05,830 Oh, don't worry about me. I'm fine. 305 00:12:05,855 --> 00:12:09,025 I wouldn't be having a party if I wasn't fine. 306 00:12:09,050 --> 00:12:10,922 - Eh... - This is a rental, people. 307 00:12:10,947 --> 00:12:12,644 Let's use our coasters. 308 00:12:12,819 --> 00:12:16,330 I'm worried about this... flaky Ken guy. 309 00:12:16,355 --> 00:12:18,197 He's not flaky. 310 00:12:18,222 --> 00:12:20,510 He's having a carpet emergency. 311 00:12:20,535 --> 00:12:22,049 Now, go mingle with people. 312 00:12:22,074 --> 00:12:23,792 - Okay, okay, okay. - Cheer 'em up. 313 00:12:24,066 --> 00:12:26,824 - Nothing like a woman scorned. - Oh, God. 314 00:12:29,644 --> 00:12:32,150 - Chip! - Hey, Mom. Sorry I'm late. 315 00:12:32,175 --> 00:12:34,228 No worries. Just grab a drink, 316 00:12:34,253 --> 00:12:36,496 maybe take someone on a tour of the house. 317 00:12:36,706 --> 00:12:37,838 Okay. 318 00:12:38,386 --> 00:12:40,596 Hey, I heard you're giving house tours. 319 00:12:40,621 --> 00:12:41,730 Yeah, I am. 320 00:12:42,152 --> 00:12:44,181 Do you always bring board games to weddings? 321 00:12:44,206 --> 00:12:45,855 It's a housewarming. 322 00:12:46,327 --> 00:12:47,327 Kitchen. 323 00:12:47,352 --> 00:12:50,494 Uh... kitchen island, where you put stuff. 324 00:12:50,519 --> 00:12:51,542 You can put that there if you want. 325 00:12:51,567 --> 00:12:54,385 - Oh, thanks. - Um... here's the fridge. 326 00:12:54,478 --> 00:12:57,099 Oh, wow, is that one of those smart refrigerators 327 00:12:57,124 --> 00:12:59,039 you can hook up to your phone? 328 00:12:59,915 --> 00:13:01,737 No, I think it's a dumb one. I don't know. 329 00:13:01,762 --> 00:13:03,009 Uh, microwave. 330 00:13:03,034 --> 00:13:05,437 Hey, I heard you're clowning again. That's great. 331 00:13:05,462 --> 00:13:06,735 No, I'm not... 332 00:13:07,400 --> 00:13:08,633 Ooh. You all right? 333 00:13:08,658 --> 00:13:10,009 I'm fine. I'm not clowning again. 334 00:13:10,034 --> 00:13:11,058 Where'd you hear that? 335 00:13:11,083 --> 00:13:13,431 Well, I just heard it through the grapevine. 336 00:13:13,456 --> 00:13:14,556 The grapevine? Well... 337 00:13:14,581 --> 00:13:16,274 Sometimes grapevines are... 338 00:13:16,642 --> 00:13:18,449 dead, Martha, and untruthful. 339 00:13:18,603 --> 00:13:20,669 I just, you know, clowning is... 340 00:13:20,994 --> 00:13:22,509 It's out of fashion. 341 00:13:22,939 --> 00:13:25,064 - Spices. Mom's got a lot of spice. - Well... 342 00:13:25,089 --> 00:13:27,057 I'm sorry, Chip. That's a bummer. 343 00:13:27,082 --> 00:13:30,165 - I know how much you love it. - Cinnamon. Thyme. 344 00:13:30,190 --> 00:13:31,540 What's your favorite spice? 345 00:13:31,768 --> 00:13:33,890 Um, dill weed. 346 00:13:33,915 --> 00:13:35,945 Really? I thought it'd be more like, uh... 347 00:13:35,970 --> 00:13:37,077 like a bay leaf. 348 00:13:37,512 --> 00:13:38,687 Why? 349 00:13:38,712 --> 00:13:39,806 Bad taste. 350 00:13:39,831 --> 00:13:41,615 - Um, sink. - Well... well, what are you 351 00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:43,648 - gonna do now? - Uh, this sink has, 352 00:13:43,673 --> 00:13:46,562 um... got this cool hose. 353 00:13:46,587 --> 00:13:49,523 It's, you know, it's got everything you need. 354 00:13:49,548 --> 00:13:51,758 - Are you still talking to Tammy? - Plus the kitchen sink. 355 00:13:51,783 --> 00:13:54,368 Do you think maybe some life coaching would help? 356 00:13:54,393 --> 00:13:55,570 I mean, I'm... 357 00:13:55,595 --> 00:13:57,939 listening to Tammy's tapes here and there, but I... 358 00:13:57,964 --> 00:13:59,611 I'm fine, Martha, I'm fine. 359 00:13:59,636 --> 00:14:02,961 Well, you'll figure it out. I found a new life coach. 360 00:14:02,986 --> 00:14:05,187 They have an in-house one at Costco, 361 00:14:05,212 --> 00:14:08,181 and he helped me plan out my next five years. 362 00:14:08,955 --> 00:14:10,218 Well, good. 363 00:14:10,822 --> 00:14:12,343 Good, you got your life all in order. 364 00:14:12,368 --> 00:14:13,390 I'll show you upstairs. 365 00:14:13,415 --> 00:14:14,941 - Um, there's a... - Okay. 366 00:14:14,966 --> 00:14:18,006 Hey, Chip, um, you know, if you want 367 00:14:18,031 --> 00:14:20,783 to talk about the clowning stuff, I'm always here. 368 00:14:22,181 --> 00:14:23,868 Well, you're not a life coach, Martha. 369 00:14:25,587 --> 00:14:27,040 I'm gonna go get a snack. 370 00:14:28,158 --> 00:14:29,861 Hey! Chip. 371 00:14:29,886 --> 00:14:32,629 I hear you're the new CEO for the rodeo. 372 00:14:33,847 --> 00:14:35,861 Yeah, Uncle Jim, I am. I'm the CEO. 373 00:14:35,886 --> 00:14:37,929 Yeah, just doing CEO duties now. 374 00:14:37,954 --> 00:14:40,096 No more... no more clowning. 375 00:14:40,121 --> 00:14:43,017 Eh, well, I'm glad you finally came to your senses. 376 00:14:43,729 --> 00:14:45,236 Clowning's for clowns. 377 00:14:45,579 --> 00:14:49,192 Hey, why don't I buy you a drink, CEO to CEO? Huh? 378 00:14:49,533 --> 00:14:51,064 - Okay. - Come on. 379 00:14:51,650 --> 00:14:53,095 Aren't the drinks for free? 380 00:15:00,682 --> 00:15:02,954 - Martha! - Hi, Mrs. Baskets. 381 00:15:02,979 --> 00:15:05,531 How are you? Can I get you a healthy wrap? 382 00:15:05,556 --> 00:15:08,118 Oh, sure. Thanks, Mrs. Baskets. 383 00:15:08,423 --> 00:15:11,736 Oh, look at Chip over there. Doesn't he look lonely? 384 00:15:11,761 --> 00:15:13,431 Why don't you bring him a wrap? 385 00:15:13,456 --> 00:15:16,654 Oh, you know what? I'm giving Chip his space right now. 386 00:15:16,679 --> 00:15:18,200 How are you doing? 387 00:15:18,302 --> 00:15:19,480 I'm terrific. 388 00:15:19,895 --> 00:15:22,129 Having a blast. Isn't this something? 389 00:15:22,154 --> 00:15:24,244 - Definitely. - Yeah. 390 00:15:24,269 --> 00:15:26,282 I think Ken would've really liked it. 391 00:15:26,307 --> 00:15:28,297 I'm sure he would want to be here. 392 00:15:28,322 --> 00:15:29,954 I mean, look at all this. 393 00:15:29,979 --> 00:15:31,547 - Yeah. - Christine, 394 00:15:31,572 --> 00:15:34,063 what was the song that you were gonna play for your first dance? 395 00:15:34,088 --> 00:15:36,219 Oh, uh, what was it? 396 00:15:36,244 --> 00:15:38,635 Oh, you probably don't know it, but it's called, uh, 397 00:15:38,660 --> 00:15:41,055 "Dedicated to the One I Love" 398 00:15:41,080 --> 00:15:42,822 by The Mamas and the Papas. 399 00:15:42,847 --> 00:15:45,571 - Oh. - Oh, yeah. Do you know that one? 400 00:15:48,486 --> 00:15:50,471 I don't know... wait, wait, oh... 401 00:15:50,496 --> 00:15:51,797 No, yeah, yeah, yeah. 402 00:15:51,822 --> 00:15:52,864 Okay, okay, okay. 403 00:15:52,889 --> 00:15:54,666 Cut that garbage off, huh? 404 00:15:59,471 --> 00:16:02,675 ♪ While I'm far away ♪ 405 00:16:02,700 --> 00:16:04,658 - ♪ From you, my baby... ♪ - Oh! I know it. 406 00:16:04,683 --> 00:16:06,463 Yes! That one. 407 00:16:06,488 --> 00:16:11,329 ♪ I know it's hard for you, my baby ♪ 408 00:16:12,692 --> 00:16:16,407 ♪ Because it's hard for me ♪ 409 00:16:16,432 --> 00:16:18,135 ♪ My baby ♪ 410 00:16:18,815 --> 00:16:23,697 ♪ And the darkest hour is just before dawn ♪ 411 00:16:27,682 --> 00:16:30,236 - ♪ Love can never be... ♪ - Oh, yeah. 412 00:16:30,261 --> 00:16:33,391 ♪ Exactly like we want it to be ♪ 413 00:16:33,416 --> 00:16:36,401 ♪ I could be satisfied ♪ 414 00:16:36,426 --> 00:16:39,190 ♪ Knowing you love me ♪ 415 00:16:39,215 --> 00:16:41,471 ♪ There's one thing I want you to do... ♪ 416 00:16:43,990 --> 00:16:45,066 I can't. 417 00:16:45,091 --> 00:16:47,322 ♪ And it's something ♪ 418 00:16:47,347 --> 00:16:51,979 ♪ That everybody needs ♪ 419 00:16:52,004 --> 00:16:56,552 ♪ Each night before you go to bed, my baby... ♪ 420 00:16:56,577 --> 00:16:58,278 - Want to dance? - Oh. 421 00:16:58,546 --> 00:17:00,405 Well, okay. 422 00:17:00,430 --> 00:17:03,301 ♪ For me, my baby, whoo... ♪ 423 00:17:03,638 --> 00:17:04,896 Ow, that's my foot, Mom. 424 00:17:04,921 --> 00:17:06,108 - Oh. - It's okay. 425 00:17:06,133 --> 00:17:08,296 - I'm sorry, honey. - You okay? 426 00:17:09,064 --> 00:17:10,960 I guess. Yeah. 427 00:17:11,671 --> 00:17:13,224 Yeah, I'm okay. 428 00:17:16,186 --> 00:17:18,444 Hey, Mom! I came as soon as my good clothes 429 00:17:18,469 --> 00:17:19,712 were dried off by the crick. 430 00:17:19,737 --> 00:17:21,844 Dale, you made it! 431 00:17:21,869 --> 00:17:23,632 I'm so glad! 432 00:17:23,657 --> 00:17:24,835 Hey, I didn't miss the vows, did I? 433 00:17:24,860 --> 00:17:27,819 Because I got you and Ken the best wedding gift 434 00:17:27,844 --> 00:17:29,882 on the most important day of your life. 435 00:17:29,907 --> 00:17:32,188 Oh, that's so nice, honey, but, listen, 436 00:17:32,213 --> 00:17:34,550 you didn't get my message, obviously. 437 00:17:34,575 --> 00:17:36,805 No. What message? 438 00:17:36,830 --> 00:17:38,071 Hey, Martha. Hey, everybody. 439 00:17:38,096 --> 00:17:39,602 I said that Ken had 440 00:17:39,627 --> 00:17:43,358 a carpet emergency and that we changed the wedding 441 00:17:43,383 --> 00:17:45,829 into a housewarming party. 442 00:17:46,051 --> 00:17:49,753 You turned it into a housewarming... party? 443 00:17:49,778 --> 00:17:51,106 Is this a prank, Mom? 444 00:17:51,131 --> 00:17:53,075 - No. - What is this? 445 00:17:53,372 --> 00:17:56,715 Nobody turns a wedding into a housewarming party, Mom. 446 00:17:56,740 --> 00:17:57,747 That's evil. 447 00:17:57,772 --> 00:18:01,215 - Hey, easy there, pal. - "Easy, pal" to you, Uncle Jim. 448 00:18:01,638 --> 00:18:03,190 What kind of man cancels his wedding 449 00:18:03,215 --> 00:18:05,020 on the day of the wedding? 450 00:18:05,045 --> 00:18:06,886 Huh? Who is this Ken guy? 451 00:18:06,911 --> 00:18:08,565 He sounds like a shyster. 452 00:18:08,609 --> 00:18:10,524 He sounds like a scoundrel. 453 00:18:10,567 --> 00:18:11,840 And just because I'm a gentleman, 454 00:18:11,865 --> 00:18:14,080 I'm not gonna say I told you so, but... 455 00:18:14,592 --> 00:18:16,080 Well, you just did tell me so. 456 00:18:16,105 --> 00:18:18,963 I told you so with my face, but not verbally, okay? 457 00:18:18,988 --> 00:18:20,478 No, I heard it verbally, honey. 458 00:18:20,503 --> 00:18:22,798 Well, if there's no wedding, there's no wedding gift. 459 00:18:22,823 --> 00:18:25,720 I guess I'll have to get this golf cart back to Gary Busey. 460 00:18:25,745 --> 00:18:27,342 Yes. The Gary Busey. 461 00:18:27,367 --> 00:18:28,619 This was his. 462 00:18:35,277 --> 00:18:37,337 Dale, are you okay? 463 00:18:37,362 --> 00:18:39,978 - Was that really Gary Busey's? - Mother! 464 00:18:45,261 --> 00:18:47,102 It's still light out. 465 00:18:47,127 --> 00:18:48,861 You really have to go? 466 00:18:48,886 --> 00:18:51,150 - Oh, honey, thanks. - Are you gonna be okay? 467 00:18:51,175 --> 00:18:53,308 - I hope so. - Oh. 468 00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:55,117 - Oh, thanks. - I love you, sweetie. 469 00:18:55,142 --> 00:18:56,250 - Ah... - Oh, thank... 470 00:18:56,275 --> 00:18:58,093 Oh, thank you for the beautiful music. 471 00:18:58,118 --> 00:18:59,298 - No-no problem. - It was so good. 472 00:18:59,323 --> 00:19:00,830 I'd pay good money to see that show in Vegas. 473 00:19:00,855 --> 00:19:02,969 - Golf cart in a pool? - Oh... 474 00:19:02,994 --> 00:19:04,500 - Get some rest! - We got to go, Mom. 475 00:19:04,525 --> 00:19:05,775 - Aw, you're leaving? - Congrats on the house. 476 00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:07,208 - Yeah, we love you, Mom. - Oh... 477 00:19:07,233 --> 00:19:08,451 Mmm. 478 00:19:08,642 --> 00:19:10,805 Yeah, you didn't have any of the, uh... 479 00:19:10,830 --> 00:19:12,064 - the cake. - Nah. 480 00:19:12,089 --> 00:19:14,048 - There's a lot of housewarming cake. - Hey, Mom. 481 00:19:14,073 --> 00:19:15,666 - Nah, we good, Mom. - Mom? 482 00:19:15,691 --> 00:19:16,751 What? 483 00:19:16,775 --> 00:19:19,900 Is it okay if I put plastic plates in the dishwasher? 484 00:19:20,376 --> 00:19:21,697 Oh. 485 00:19:22,316 --> 00:19:24,101 Put everything in there. 486 00:19:38,789 --> 00:19:39,789 Hello? 487 00:19:39,814 --> 00:19:41,092 Anybody home? 488 00:19:41,759 --> 00:19:44,625 Ken? What are you doing here? 489 00:19:44,650 --> 00:19:48,371 Well, I thought about it, and I just couldn't miss our big day. 490 00:19:48,892 --> 00:19:50,510 I got to fly right back out tomorrow, 491 00:19:50,535 --> 00:19:52,408 but I wanted to be here tonight. 492 00:19:52,433 --> 00:19:55,043 - Well, honey, it's over. - Christine. 493 00:19:55,068 --> 00:19:56,824 I told you I could fly back, 494 00:19:57,188 --> 00:19:58,488 but you said no. 495 00:19:58,815 --> 00:20:00,582 You said it was no big deal. 496 00:20:00,607 --> 00:20:02,549 Well, it wasn't a big deal, and then people started 497 00:20:02,574 --> 00:20:04,152 coming up to me and saying, 498 00:20:04,177 --> 00:20:07,338 "Are you okay, Christine? Why isn't Ken here? 499 00:20:07,370 --> 00:20:09,871 Where's Ken? I thought Ken was gonna be here," 500 00:20:09,896 --> 00:20:13,404 so I felt so alone. 501 00:20:13,429 --> 00:20:16,965 Well, they were probably just being concerned about you. 502 00:20:17,355 --> 00:20:19,923 And I realize now that I should have been, too. 503 00:20:20,504 --> 00:20:22,519 Oh, God. 504 00:20:23,260 --> 00:20:27,467 My first marriage was a mess, and now 505 00:20:28,317 --> 00:20:32,553 my second marriage, I'm not even to the "I do's..." 506 00:20:33,756 --> 00:20:35,389 and it's a mess. 507 00:20:38,976 --> 00:20:40,741 Christine, I'm sorry. 508 00:20:42,521 --> 00:20:44,740 I'm sorry I missed today. 509 00:20:45,466 --> 00:20:49,647 I made a big mistake that I wish I hadn't made. 510 00:20:51,319 --> 00:20:54,975 I guess I'm just not good at juggling my business in Denver 511 00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:58,069 and... having my new life here. 512 00:21:00,147 --> 00:21:01,147 Well... 513 00:21:02,109 --> 00:21:03,709 you missed quite a show. 514 00:21:04,663 --> 00:21:08,202 Dale drove a golf cart straight into the pool. 515 00:21:08,571 --> 00:21:11,811 My brother said he was gonna beat you up, 516 00:21:12,227 --> 00:21:13,975 and he was crazy. 517 00:21:14,631 --> 00:21:17,600 And all my friends, I found out they can't carry a tune. 518 00:21:19,522 --> 00:21:21,819 Why doesn't any of that surprise me? 519 00:21:23,319 --> 00:21:26,624 So, I guess if that's all okay, I guess I could forgive you. 520 00:21:30,350 --> 00:21:32,334 Christine, let's get married tonight. 521 00:21:32,530 --> 00:21:34,700 Tonight? Nobody's here. 522 00:21:34,725 --> 00:21:36,973 Eh. Who cares? 523 00:21:37,124 --> 00:21:38,335 Let's do it. 524 00:21:39,055 --> 00:21:40,535 Just the two of us. 525 00:22:05,867 --> 00:22:07,786 I now pronounce thee 526 00:22:07,811 --> 00:22:09,303 man and wife. 527 00:22:32,444 --> 00:22:35,844 Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie www.addic7ed.com