>> Steve: FROM STUDIO 6B IN ROCKEFELLER CENTER IN THE HEART
OF NEW YORK CITY, IT'S "THE TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON."
TONIGHT, JOIN JIMMY AND HIS GUESTS - MICHAEL CHE,
KATE UPTON MUSICAL GUEST NICKI NICOLE WITH SPECIAL GUEST LUNAY,
AND FEATURING THE LEGENDARY ROOTS CREW >> Questlove: 1450
>> Steve: AND NOW, HERE HE IS, JIMMY FALLON
*
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: OH, MY GOODNESS!
HEY! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THANK YOU VERY MUCH, EVERYBODY
THANK YOU! PLEASE WELCOME, WELCOME, WELCOME, WELCOME TO "THE
TONIGHT SHOW", EVERYBODY THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
LET'S GET TO SOME NEWS WELL, GUYS TODAY THE CDC MADE A HUGE ANNOUNCEMENT ABOUT
WEARING MASKS. WATCH THIS
>> THE CDC NOW SAYS THAT
VACCINATED AMERICANS GENERALLY DO NOT NEED TO WEAR MASKS OUTSIDE AS LONG AS THEY'RE NOT
IN A LARGE GATHERING >> Jimmy: WHEN PEOPLE HEARD THAT, PEOPLE IN THE STREET
STARTED FLASHING THEIR MOUTHS LIKE IT WAS MARDI GRAS LIKE, WHOO
WHOO [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE I GOT TO BE HONEST, I'M GOING
TO MISS WEARING A MASK THE ADULT ACNE MADE ME FEEL YOUNG.
[ LAUGHTER ] ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, NOW WE CAN STOP WEIRDLY OPENING OUR EYES
TO GREET PEOPLE ON THE STREET. LIKE - [ LAUGHTER ]
THAT'S RIGHT THE CDC UPDATED ITS GUIDANCE ON OUTDOOR MASKING FOR BOTH
VACCINATED AND UNVACCINATED PEOPLE AND THEY EVEN RELEASED THIS
HELPFUL CHART. TAKE A LOOK AT THIS. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
YEAH, I LIKE TO THINK THE SKETCH ARTIST AT THE CDC IS LIKE, "I'LL TELL YOU, I CAN DO
HAIR, EARS, EYES AND MOUTH I JUST DON'T DO NOSES. I JUST DON'T -
IT IS NOT MY THING." THE TWO MOST IMPORTANT THINGS ABOUT A --
"I'LL DO IT FOR CHEAP, I'LL DO IT FOR CHEAP I JUST DON'T DO THEM."
THE CHART RANKS ACTIVITIES FROM SAFEST TO LESS SAFE TO LEAST SAFE
IT'S THE SAME CHART PEOPLE USE WHEN DECIDING BETWEEN DELTA, UNITED AND SPIRIT AIRLINES
[ LAUGHTER ] WELL, IT IS A BIG WEEK FOR PRESIDENT BIDEN.
TOMORROW HE DELIVERS HIS FIRST JOINT ADDRESS TO CONGRESS. YEP, EVERYONE IS LOOKING
FORWARD TO HEARING BIDEN SPEAK THEN AT THE LAST MINUTE THEY'RE GOING TO CALL ON
ANTHONY HOPKINS INSTEAD. IT IS ALWAYS INTERESTING TO WATCH A PRESIDENTIAL ADDRESS
HALF THE CROWD CHEERS, HALF THE CROWD SITS IN SILENCE. IT IS LIKE A THROWBACK TO HARRY
AND MEGHAN'S WEDDING, DON'T YOU THINK? [ LAUGHTER ]
YEAH, BIDEN ADDRESS WILL BE ON ALL OF THE MAJOR NETWORKS. OF COURSE, ON TELEMUNDO, BIDEN
WILL BE DUBBED IN SPANISH AND ON FOX NEWS HE WILL BE DUBBED BY A DEMON
[ MUFFLED SPEAKING ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE SOME TECH NEWS
AFTER A LONG WAIT, APPLE ROLLED OUT A NEW PRIVACY FEATURE THAT REQUIRES APPS LIKE FACEBOOK TO
ASK PERMISSION BEFORE TRACKING THE ACTIVITY ON YOUR iPHONE. YEAH
[ APPLAUSE ] SO NOW YOU CAN RELAX AT HOME IN TOTAL PRIVACY.
>> YES, TOTAL PRIVACY. HA-HA-HA [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: YEAH, AFTER YEARS OF INFRINGING ON OUR PRIVACY, APPLE IS LIKE, WE'RE AGAINST
COLLECTING YOUR DATA STARTING NOW. [ LAUGHTER ]
APPLE ALSO INTRODUCED NEW EMOJIS INCLUDING FACE EXHALING AND FACE IN CLOUDS
TAKE A LOOK. [ LAUGHTER ] EVEN THE EGGPLANT EMOJI IS
LIKE, COME ON, WE ALL KNOW WHAT THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE YOU WANT TO PLAY THIS GAME
I SAW THAT GUINNESS JUST DEBUTED A NEW BEER WITH NITRO COLD BREWED COFFEE IN IT
CHECK IT OUT YEAH THE PERFECT GIFT FOR THE
SLUGGISH DRUNK IN YOUR LIFE. [ LAUGHTER ] IT IS A GREAT PRODUCT IF YOU
WANT YOUR HEART TO FEEL LIKE IT IS NAPPING AND SKYDIVING AT THE SAME TIME.
IT SHOULD BE FUN WALKING AROUND THE OFFICE WITH A CAN OF THAT. LIKE, "9:00 A.M., TIME FOR
ANOTHER PICK ME UP [ LAUGHTER ] THAT'S RIGHT, GUINNESS AND
COFFEE IRISH PEOPLE CALL THAT BABY FORMULA.
AND ANOTHER UNLIKELY PAIRING, VACCINE AT ONE, THIS AT 1A TO SOME IT SOUNDS WEIRD BUT
IT'S STILL BETTER THAN GERBER SRIRACHA [ LAUGHTER ]
WELCOME BACK TO BABY HOT ONES! COME ON. HEY, SOME GOOD NEWS FOR DUNKIN'
DONUTS FANS. THEY JUST ANNOUNCED THEY'RE ADDING COCONUT MILK TO THEIR
MENU YEP, THEY'LL KEEP IT ON THE TABLE BETWEEN THE CREAM AND THE
ASHTRAY. [ LAUGHTER ] AND IF YOU ORDER IT, LEGALLY
THEY'RE ALLOWED TO MAKE FUN OF YOU. "I GOT A LARGE ICED COFFEE FOR
PRINCE BRANDON, WHO IS TOO GOOD FOR COWS THAT'S BRANDON, B AS IN
BEE-ATCH!" [ LAUGHTER ] AND FINALLY SOME NEWS FROM
OVERSEAS I READ THAT NEXT MONTH A A HIGH-END APARTMENT COMPLEX IN
LONDON IS OPENING UP A A SEE-THROUGH POOL THAT SITS 115 FEET HIGH.
LOOK AT THIS THING >> Steve: OH [ AUDIENCE OHS ]
>> Jimmy: IT'S PERFECT, BECAUSE WHEN I THINK SUNNY ROOFTOP POOLS I THINK LONDON
[ LAUGHTER ] YOU KNOW SOMEONE'S LAST WORDS ARE GOING TO BE, "CANNONBALL!"
[ APPLAUSE ] WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW GIVE IT UP FOR THE ROOTS,
EVERYBODY!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: WHAT A SHOW WE HAVE
FOR YOU TONIGHT. JOINING US IN STUDIO, HIS NEW HBO MAX SHOW "THAT DAMN
MICHAEL CHE," THAT'S THE NAME OF THE SHOW. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
"THAT DAMN MICHAEL CHE," WILL BE AVAILABLE MAY 6th FROM "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE,"
MICHAEL CHE IS HERE IN STUDIO! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE HE'S ONE OF OUR FAVORITES.
PLUS, SHE HAS A NEW WELLNESS LINE CALLED "FOUND ACTIVE. KATE UPTON IS HERE
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE AND WE'VE GOT GREAT MUSIC FROM NICKI NICOLE WITH SPECIAL GUEST
LUNAY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE I'M EXCITED ABOUT THIS
HEY, QUEST, WELCOME BACK AND CONGRATULATIONS, BUDDY >> Questlove: HEY, THANK YOU
>> Jimmy: THAT WAS FANTASTIC QUESTLOVE. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
THE MUSICAL DIRECTOR FOR THE ACADEMY AWARDS >> Questlove: YES.
[ CHEERS ] >> Jimmy: DUDE, YOU LOOKED GREAT.
YOU SOUNDED GREAT. WHAT WAS IT LIKE WERE YOU -- WAS IT WEIRD
WERE YOU NERVOUS >> Questlove: IT WAS FUN I MEAN THAT'S THE FIRST TIME
THAT I HAVE BEEN OUT ANYWHERE SINCE THE LAST OSCARS. SO -
>> Jimmy: WOW. >> Questlove: YOU KNOW BUT, NO, IT WAS FUN.
IT WAS A LITTLE PARTY, YOU KNOW >> Jimmy: YEAH
>> Questlove: WE HAD FUN >> Jimmy: BUT THE OPENING WHERE REGINA GRABBED THE OSCAR, YOU
WERE DOING THAT? >> Questlove: MAN, THAT WAS SO HARD
WE HAD IT PERFECTLY TIMED. >> Jimmy: RIGHT? I WAS SWEATING FOR YOU, DUDE
I WAS LIKE, OH, MY GOSH. >> Questlove: YEAH, I DIDN'T THINK SHE WAS GOING TO MAKE IT
BUT I KEPT EXTENDING IT AND LOOKING AT THE END MARKING, YEAH
>> Jimmy: AND THEN THE BIGGEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT, BESIDES DANIEL KALUUYA, WAS
GLENN CLOSE. >> Questlove: YEAH >> Jimmy: DOING "DA BUTT."
>> Questlove: WHO KNEW THAT SHE KNEW "DA BUTT. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: I DID NOT KNOW >> Questlove: EVERYONE ASKED, "WAS THAT SCRIPTED?"
BUT REALLY, WE DIDN'T PREPARE HER. SHE JUST -- WE TOLD HER
SOMETHING WAS GOING TO HAPPEN BUT, SHE DIDN'T KNOW >> Jimmy: YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT
SOMEONE IS GOING TO DO AND OF COURSE, SHE'S SO IS GAME
>> Questlove: YEAH >> Jimmy: SHE'S SO MUCH FUN. REMEMBER SHE CAME ON THE SHOW
AND WE HAD A CONTEST, HOW MANY BABY CARROTS CAN WE FIT IN OUR MOUTHS
[ LAUGHTER ] SHE WAS SO GAME. SHE WAS LIKE, LET'S DO IT, WHY
NOT. >> Questlove: THAT'S HOW I KNEW SHE WAS GAME FOR THIS.
>> Jimmy: YEAH, I LOVE -- ANYWAYS, IT WAS GREAT BUDDY. CONGRATULATIONS.
>> Questlove: THANK YOU, THANK YOU. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
>> Jimmy: THIS IS BIG. THE CENSUS BUREAU JUST RELEASED THEIR FINDINGS FOR 2020.
AND ACCORDING TO THE DATA, THERE ARE -- THIS IS A FUN FACT FOR YOU -- 331 MILLION PEOPLE
LIVING IN THE UNITED STATES. PRETTY INTERESTING IN FACT, THERE WERE A LOT OF
SURPRISING RESULTS FROM THE CENSUS HERE. >> Steve: REALLY
>> Jimmy: YEAH CHECK OUT SOME OF THESE. FIRST UP, 489,000 PEOPLE ARE
NAMED JEFF BUT FOR NO REASONS NO ONE CAN EXPLAIN SPELLED G-E-O-F-F.
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Steve: WOW. >> Jimmy: YEAH
>> Steve: 400 -- GEOFF >> Jimmy: YEAH >> Steve: 489,000, THAT'S
A LOT. >> Jimmy: LOOK AT THIS 11 MILLION PEOPLE THINK THE
QUAKER OATS GUY IS A FOUNDING FATHER [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
>> Steve: 11 >> Jimmy: I MIGHT BE ONE OF THEM
CHECK OUT THIS NEXT RESULT 7.5 MILLION PEOPLE DON'T KNOW IF REINDEER ARE REAL AND ARE
AFRAID TO ASK. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Steve: THEY ANSWERED THE
CENSUS THOUGH. >> Jimmy: YEAH, OF COURSE. THEY ANSWERED -- OF COURSE
THEY'RE AFRAID TO ASK THAT >> Steve: THAT'S A SPECIFIC QUESTION
>> Jimmy: YEAH 3.5 MILLION PEOPLE BELIEVE MOUNT RUSHMORE IS A NATURAL
ROCK FORMATION THAT JUST HAPPENS TO LOOK LIKE FOUR PRESIDENTS
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE THAT'S INSANE. >> Steve: CRAZY.
>> Jimmy: THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE. >> Steve: MORE THAN JEFF >> Jimmy: YEAH
[ LAUGHTER ] UP NEXT, 20 MILLION PEOPLE CAN'T DESCRIBE A GOATEE WITHOUT
USING THEIR HANDS. [ LAUGHTER ] LIKE THAT.
HOW ABOUT THIS ONE HERE? 750,000 PEOPLE THINK ELON MUSK IS A COLOGNE THEY SELL AT
WALGREENS. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE I REMEMBER WEARING IT IN HIGH
SCHOOL >> Steve: YEAH THAT WAS DRAKKAR NOIR.
>> Jimmy: AND FINALLY, 165 MILLION PEOPLE "LITERALLY CAN'T EVEN" ANYMORE.
I LITERALLY CAN'T EVEN [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE I LEARNED A LOT.
STICK AROUND WE'LL BE BACK WITH "NEWS FROM THE FUTURE."
COME ON BACK, EVERYBODY. * >> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK
HEY, DO YOU GUYS EVER WISH YOU COULD LOOK INTO THE FUTURE AND SEE WHAT THE WORLD LOOKS LIKE?
[ CHEERS ] WELL WE HERE AT "THE TONIGHT SHOW" GOT OUR HANDS ON A NEW
TECHNOLOGY THAT LETS US DO JUST THAT IT IS TIME FOR "NEWS FROM THE
FUTURE!"
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * NEW
FROM THE FUTURE * >> Jimmy: SORRY, WHAT? >> Steve: YOU GOT A TECHNOLOGY
THAT CAN SEE INTO THE FUTURE >> Jimmy: APPARENTLY "THE TONIGHT SHOW" HAS THAT, THAT'S
CORRECT. >> Steve: AND YOU ARE ONLY USING IT TO DO COMICAL
HEADLINES TO SEE - >> Jimmy: NO, NO, NO [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Steve: I MEAN, WOULDN'T YOU SEE LIKE STOCK MARKET OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT, OR?
>> Jimmy: NO, NO, WHAT I'M USING IT TO SEE, HEADLINES, NEWS FROM THE FUTURE
USUALLY THERE'S AN ECHO WHEN I SAY THAT WORD. [ ECHOING
[ LAUGHTER ] OH, NOW THERE IS BUT SOMETIMES WHEN I GO --
>> Steve: IF YOU JUST USE YOUR MACHINE YOU WOULD HAVE SEEN IT [ ECHOING
>> Jimmy: NEWS FROM THE FUTURE THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS. IT'S AN ECHO EFFECT WHEN YOU
SAY IT THAT'S HOW FUTURISTIC IT IS. >> Steve: WOW, THAT'S VERY
FUTURISTIC >> Jimmy: WELL IT'S INTO, YOU KNOW
>> Steve: FUTURE, YEAH >> Jimmy: SPACE AND BEYOND >> Steve: RIGHT, CAUSE AS YOU
SAY IT YOUR VOICE TRAVELS TO THE FUTURE >> Jimmy: YEAH, AND THEN BACK
TO THE PRESENT >> Steve: PRESENT, RIGHT AND THEN BACK TO THE FUTURE.
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: BACK TO THE PRESENT. >> Steve: OH, THAT SHOULD BE
THE SEQUEL >> Jimmy: A SPIN-OFF SERIES. >> Steve: YEAH
>> Jimmy: YOU KNOW, THEY KIND OF DID IT IN "BACK TO THE FUTURE" RIGHT?
>> Steve: YEAH, MORE THAN -- BUT THEY DIDN'T CALL IT BACK TO THE --
>> Jimmy: "BACK TO THE PRESENT. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Steve: COME ON, WRITE IT DOWN TRADEMARK IT
>> Jimmy: I DON'T HAVE NO PAPER AND WITH COVID, ALL MY IDEAS JUST GO OUT INTO THE FUTURE.
[ ECHOES FUTURE >> Steve: AHH NICE [ LAUGHTER ]
WOW. >> Jimmy: ALRIGHT, LET ME SHOW YOU.
THIS IS "NEWS FROM THE FUTURE. >> Steve: OKAY >> Jimmy: YEAH
>> Steve: I CAN'T WAIT >> Jimmy: FIRST UP, LIZZO AND CHRIS EVANS RECENTLY WENT VIRAL
AFTER CHRIS RESPONDED -- [ CHEERS ] -- THIS IS A TRUE STORY, CHRIS
RESPONDED TO A DM -- [ LAUGHTER ] CHRIS RESPONDED TO A DM THAT
LIZZO SENT HIM WHILE DRUNK NOW LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENS IN THE FUTURE
>> LIZZO AND CHRIS EVANS WERE MARRIED THIS WEEKEND AT A PRIVATE WEDDING IN CALABASAS
CHRIS HAS DECIDED TO TAKE LIZZO'S LAST NAME BUT SINCE SHE DOES NOT HAVE ONE, HE WILL NOW
BE REFERRED TO AS CHRIZZO! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Steve: WOW.
>> Jimmy: HE'S CHRIZZO NOW >> Steve: HE'S CHRIZZO -- WELL, HE WILL BE CHRIZZO
>> Jimmy: IN THE FUTURE. YEAH >> Steve: HE'S NOT CHRIZZO NOW
>> Jimmy: NO CONGRATS TO LIZZO AND CHRIZZO. >> Steve: YEAH
>> Jimmy: YEAH [ LAUGHTER ] JUST CAUSE SHE DIDN'T HAVE A
A LAST NAME. HE CHANGED HIS FIRST NAME TO - >> Steve: CHRIZZO.
>> Jimmy: THAT'S CORRECT >> Steve: SO, ZO NOW IS THEIR LAST NAME I GUESS.
LIZZO AND CHRIZZO. MAYBE. IT'S THE FUTURE.
WE DON'T KNOW. >> Jimmy: YEAH, I DON'T KNOW HERE'S ANOTHER STORY
IN A RECENT POLL, MATTHEW McCONAUGHEY BEAT TEXAS GOVERNOR GREG ABBOTT BY
12 POINTS IN A HYPOTHETICAL RACE FOR GOVERNOR. >> Steve: WOW.
>> Jimmy: LET'S SEE HOW IT TURNS OUT.
>> TODAY PRESIDENT McCONAUGHEY
UNVEILED A NATIONWIDE TOWER GRID THAT'S RUNS ON, QUOTE, "VIBES."
HE ALSO ADDED A BONGO SOLO TO THE NATIONAL ANTHEM. >> Jimmy: THERE YOU GO
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THAT'S FUN WE'RE MISSING SOMETHING.
>> Steve: 11 MINUTE BONGO SOLO >> Jimmy: I HEARD THE ORIGINAL NATIONAL ANTHEM HAD A BONGO
SOLO >> Steve: BUT THEY TOOK IT OUT >> Jimmy: HE BROUGHT IT BACK
>> Steve: WOW. >> Jimmy: YEAH, FRANCIS SCOTT KEY'S BIG --
>> Steve: BIG BONGO FAN. >> Jimmy: YEAH NEXT UP, HULU HAS ORDERED
A "HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER" SEQUEL SERIES CALLED "HOW I MET YOUR FATHER.
[ CHEERS ] >> Steve: OH >> Jimmy: I'D WATCH IT
THAT'S EXCITING. LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENS
MOTHER" SEQUEL SERIES IS ON THE
WAY. IT IS CALLED "HOW I MET YOUR FATHER'S WEIRD BROTHER."
[ LAUGHTER ] AND IT'S COMING TO PRINGLE'S NEW STREAMING SERIES, PRINGLES
PLUS * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
>> Steve: PRINGLES - >> Jimmy: WHAT'S THAT? >> PRINGLES HAS THEIR OWN
STREAMING SERVICE? >> Jimmy: IN THE FUTURE, PRINGLES PLUS.
YEAH >> Steve: WOW, NOT EVEN -- SO WHAT, THEY HAVE REGULAR
PRINGLE STREAMING SERVICE. THEN THEY GOT PRINGLES PLUS. >> Jimmy: I DON'T KNOW WHAT
HAPPENS IN THE FUTURE, APPARENTLY - >> Steve: BUT APPARENTLY,
PRINGLES -- I'M NOW GOING TO INVEST IN PRINGLES APPARENTLY. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: IT IS NOT A MONEY-MAKING SCHEME. I'M JUST GIVING YOU HEADLINES
FROM THE FUTURE. PLEASE DON'T DO THAT >> Steve: I'M NOT TAKE THE -
>> Jimmy: NO WAGERING, NO GAMBLING PLEASE
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: PRINGLES PLUS. >> Jimmy: OUR NEXT STORY HERE
IS NEW YORK CITY HAS GIVEN PERMITS TO THE COMPANIES BIRD, LIME AND VEO TO LET THEM START
RENTING E-SCOOTERS IN JUNE >> Steve: EWW. >> Jimmy: I KNOW
LET'S SEE HOW IT TURNS OUT
>> THERE'S CURRENTLY A 40 BIRD PILEUP ON FIFTH AVENUE
THE MAYOR ANNOUNCED THAT THEY WILL BE BANNED TOMORROW. >> IT HAS BEEN REAL TOUGH ON
ALL OF US. >> WHEN A WOMAN WAS HIT BY A A RUNAWAY SCOOTER AND
DISLOCATED HER HIP, BUT THEN WAS HIT BY ANOTHER SCOOTER THAT POPPED HER HIP BACK INTO PLACE
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: WOW. >> Steve: WOW.
>> Jimmy: CAN YOU IMAGINE THE LUCK [ APPLAUSE ]
>> Steve: WHAT ARE THE ODDS OF THAT >> Jimmy: CAN YOU IMAGINE?
LUCKY LADY >> Steve: WOW. >> Jimmy: LUCKY, LUCKY LADY.
YEAH >> Steve: DIDN'T BREAK HER HIP, JUST DISLODGED IT.
>> Jimmy: YEAH DISLODGED AND WHACK BACK IN. >> Steve: WHACK, RIGHT BACK IN
PLACE. >> Jimmy: UP NEXT, RETAILERS ARE SELLING REALISTIC MUSCULAR
BODY SUITS FOR PEOPLE WHO WANT TO LOOK FIT WITHOUT HITTING THE GYM.
LET'S SEE HOW THAT GOES.
IMPRESSIVE PHYSIQUE HAS BEEN A A SUIT ALL ALONG
FOR HIS NEXT MOVIE, JOHNSON WILL APPEAR IN HIS ACTUAL 140-POUND BODY TO PORTRAY
A WALGREEN'S STOCK BOY NAMED GLEN [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
>> Steve: WHAT I WEAR CHILDREN'S PANTS. THAT'S IN THE FUTURE
>> Jimmy: FINALLY, IT WAS ANNOUNCED THAT A NEW "DOWNTON ABBEY" MOVIE WILL HIT THEATERS
LATER THIS YEAR. LET'S CHECK OUT THE FUTURE
SEQUEL WAS JUST ANNOUNCED.
THE MOVIE IS CALLED "D9" AND WILL FEATURE VIN DIESEL, LUDACRIS, AND MAGGIE SMITH
>> GUYS, WE GOT TO COME UP WITH ANOTHER PLAN THEY GOT A TANK.
>> YOU CAN'T BE AS DESPERATE AS THAT >> Jimmy: THERE YOU GO
THE FUTURE [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THAT'S ALL THE TIME WE HAVE FOR
"NEWS FROM THE FUTURE. [ ECHOES FUTURE STICK AROUND
WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MICHAEL CHE, EVERYONE. COME ON BACK
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> Jimmy: MY FIRST GUEST
TONIGHT IS AN EMMY-NOMINATED COMEDIAN WHO YOU KNOW FROM "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE."
HE HAS A BRAND-NEW SHOW CALLED "THAT DAMN MICHAEL CHE." ALL EPISODES WILL BE AVAILABLE
MAY 6th ON HBO MAX EVERYONE PLEASE WELCOME MICHAEL CHE!
* * >> Jimmy: THEY LOVE YOU.
COME ON. THEY LOVE YOU. YOU FEEL THAT?
COME ON. HOW GREAT DOES THAT FEEL THANK YOU.
>> I FEEL GREAT. >> Jimmy: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR JOINING US IN STUDIO, BUDDY.
IT'S ALWAYS GOOD TO SEE YOU. HAVE YOU BEEN ABLE TO MOVE INTO THE NEW HOUSE YET?
>> YEAH, MAN I -- THIS IS MY FIRST, LIKE, TIME LIVING IN AN ACTUAL HOUSE,
AND IT'S SCARY [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: WAIT, WHAT DO YOU
MEAN BECAUSE YOU'RE USED TO WHAT? APARTMENTS
>> I'M USED TO NOISE, I'M USED TO, LIKE, AMBULANCES AND FIRETRUCKS AND ALL THAT.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: THAT CALMS YOU DOWN? >> YEAH, THIS IS LIKE SCARY
WHEN YOU HEAR JUST YOUR HOUSE MAKE NOISE [ LAUGHTER ]
THERE'S LIKE THIS ICE MAKER IN THE FRIDGE THING OR WHATEVER, AND EVERY TIME IN THE MIDDLE OF
THE NIGHT WHEN IT'S VERY STILL -- YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING
ABOUT, RIGHT [ CHEERS ] I ALWAYS THINK I'M BEING ROBBED
BY, LIKE, THE THREE STOOGES. [ LAUGHTER ] IT SOUNDS LIKE SOMEONE FALLING
DOWN THE STAIRS EVERY TIME IT'S SCARY >> Jimmy: YOU'RE BEING ROBBED
BY THE THREE STOOGES >> YEAH, IT'S ALWAYS LOUD AND CLUMSY
BUT IT'S COOL, IT'S COOL >> Jimmy: CONGRATULATIONS. I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU
LAST TIME YOU WERE ON THE SHOW YOU WERE HERE WITH COLIN JOST, AND THEN A FEW WEEKS LATER HE
GOT MARRIED. >> ALLEGEDLY [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: NOW, DON'T SAY THAT. >> I STILL DON'T BUY IT, MAN >> Jimmy: YOU WERE -
>> HE MARRIED SCARLETT JOHANSSON HOW'S THAT POSSIBLE?
WHAT [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE I DON'T THINK SHE KNOWS SHE'S
SCARLETT JOHANSSON [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: LAST TIME YOU WERE
SAYING THAT YOU WERE GOING TO MAKE A SPEECH -- >> I WANTED TO
I WANTED TO, LIKE, INTERRUPT THE WEDDING. >> Jimmy: YEAH
[ LAUGHTER ] LIKE, SO IF SOMEBODY SAID, "DOES ANYONE OBJECT WITH THIS,"
YOU WERE GOING TO STAND UP AND DO YOUR SPEECH AND RUIN HIS WEDDING.
>> YEAH. >> Jimmy: DID YOU? >> NO, I DIDN'T.
WELL, I HAD ALL THESE -- I WANTED TO. I DIDN'T HAVE THE COURAGE.
>> Jimmy: YEAH, GOOOD. SMART. >> I HAD ALL OF THESE PICTURES
OF THE ROCK THAT I WAS GOING TO SEND HER, AND BE LIKE, "YOU COULD MARRY THE ROCK."
[ LAUGHTER ] I STILL DON'T BELIEVE IT I STILL THINK AT SOME POINT
THIS IS LIKE JUST, LIKE, ONE LONG SACHA BARON COHEN BIT [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: YOU GUYS ARE GREAT ON "WEEKEND UPDATE" TOGETHER. I DO LOVE THIS ONE BIT YOU DO
WHERE YOU MAKE COLIN READ JOKES THAT YOU WROTE >> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: AND HE MAKES YOU READ - I MEAN, THIS IS THE BEST THING
I'VE EVER SEEN >> YEAH, WE CALL IT "JOKE SWAP."
>> Jimmy: A JOKE SWAP. BUT I MEAN LIKE, THIS -- HOW DID THAT START
>> IT WAS ACTUALLY HIS IDEA, WHICH WAS KIND OF FUNNY BECAUSE I THOUGHT HE WAS TRYING TO
PRANK ME SEE, I'M PARANOID. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: YEAH >> I THINK EVERYTHING'S A PRANK.
RIGHT NOW I THINK THIS IS ALL A PRANK. BUT HE WAS LIKE, "HEY, WHY
DON'T WE DO SOMETHING WHERE, LIKE, YOU WRITE JOKES FOR ME, I WRITE JOKES FOR YOU AND WE
DON'T KNOW UNTIL WE GET ON AIR. AND I'M LIKE, "OH, YOU'RE
TRYING TO SET ME UP. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: YEAH
>> SO I STARTED THINKING OF, LIKE, SOME REALLY RACIST THINGS FOR HIM TO SAY, BECAUSE I'M
LIKE - [ LAUGHTER ] "YOU'RE NOT GOING TO GET ME,
YOU'RE GOING TO CATCH SOME FIRE COMING IN THE DOOR." >> Jimmy: YEAH, OF COURSE.
>> AND THEN WE GOT ON THE AIR AND A LOT OF HIS JOKES WERE KIND OF TAME
>> Jimmy: AND JUST NICE, AND ALL YOURS ARE -- >> ALL OF MINE WERE JUST LIKE
ABOUT ROSA PARKS [ LAUGHTER ] I WAS LIKE, "OH, OH, OKAY,
THAT'S ONE WAY TO DO IT. >> Jimmy: I MEAN, DUDE, HIS FACE, YOU COULD JUST SEE HIM
SWEATING >> IT WAS BRIGHT RED, AND BLACK PEOPLE LOVED IT.
IT'S AWESOME [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: IT WAS JUST ANNOUNCED
THAT ELON MUSK IS GOING TO HOST "SNL" MAY 8th. ARE YOU -- WITH MILEY CYRUS, BY
THE WAY. >> YEAH, NO, IT'S GOING TO BE GREAT.
[ CHEERS ] >> Jimmy: IT'S A BIG SHOW, ARE YOU EXCITED TO MEET HIM?
>> I AM EXCITED TO MEET HIM. I DON'T KNOW IF HE KNOWS, LIKE -- USUALLY, LIKE, WE HAVE
A TRADITION -- I DON'T KNOW, I THINK IT IS IN THE BOOK OR WHATEVER -- BUT AT "SATURDAY
NIGHT LIVE," IT'S CUSTOMARY FOR HOSTS TO GIVE, LIKE, A COUPLE MILLION DOLLARS TO THE CAST
MEMBERS. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: YEAH
WOW. >> YEAH, I DON'T KNOW IF HE'S -- IF HE'S A COOL GUY,
MAYBE HE'LL -- >> Jimmy: KEEP UP THAT TRADITION.
>> YEAH, MAYBE [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: SEE, THAT'S SO SMART
SEE, THAT'S SMART, YEAH. >> HE'S GOING TO MARS, MAN HE DOESN'T NEED ALL THAT MONEY
>> Jimmy: WOULD YOU EVER GO TO SPACE? >> NO, NOT ON PURPOSE.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: HOW WOULD YOU GET THERE ON ACCIDENT?
>> I DON'T KNOW. >> Jimmy: GO TO L.A., NEXT THING YOU'RE LIKE, "WAIT, IS
THAT EARTH?" [ LAUGHTER ] >> I DON'T KNOW.
I WOULDN'T WOULD YOU? >> Jimmy: I THOUGHT ABOUT IT
NO >> IF THE RICHEST MAN IN THE WORLD IS GOING, WOULD YOU GO
>> Jimmy: NO >> OKAY. >> Jimmy: I'D GO MAYBE LIKE THE
YEAR AFTER THE RICHEST MAN IN THE WORLD. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
>> I'LL GO WHEN THEY BUILD A A CVS THERE. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
>> Jimmy: UNTIL THAT, NO >> YEAH, UNTIL THERE'S A CVS, I DON'T TRUST IT
>> Jimmy: I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS SHOW ON HBO MAX I'M SO PSYCHED THAT YOU MADE
THIS IT'S CALLED "THAT DAMN MICHAEL CHE.
>> YEAH. >> Jimmy: WHICH IS SO FUNNY EVEN JUST SAYING THE TITLE
BECAUSE THE AUDIENCE WAS LIKE, "WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT ABOUT MICHAEL CHE?
>> THAT'S WHY I LIKE IT, BECAUSE IT COULD GO EITHER WAY IT COULD BE LIKE, "MAN, THAT
DAMN MICHAEL CHE IS FUNNY," OR IT COULD BE "THAT DAMN MICHAEL CHE.
[ LAUGHTER ] I LIKE THE KIND OF WEIGHT OF IT
>> Jimmy: IT'S GREAT WHAT IS IT LIKE? WHAT DO YOU COMPARE IT TO?
>> I WANTED TO CALL IT "THAT BLACK-ASS MICHAEL CHE. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: YEAH, OKAY, YEAH >> BUT HBO SAID NO >> Jimmy: NO, YEAH
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: IS IT SKETCH IS IT STAND-UP
WHAT IS IT >> I THINK IT -- IT'S LIKE LOOSE KIND OF JOKES.
>> Jimmy: YEAH >> AND THEN THERE'S ALSO SOME SKETCHES
AND IT'S JUST FUN, YOU KNOW. IT'S LIKE SIX EPISODES [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: I WANT EVERYONE TO WATCH. >> YEAH, I WANT EVERYBODY TO
WATCH IT >> Jimmy: "THAT DAMN MICHAEL CHE.
>> PLEASE, WATCH IT. IT'S FUN >> Jimmy: MAKE SURE YOU GET ON
THIS [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE HBO, HBO MAX
I WANT TO SHOW EVERYONE A CLIP HERE'S MICHAEL CHE - >> YOU GOT A CLIP?
>> Jimmy: IN HIS NEW SHOW -- YEAH, YOU GOT A CLIP YOU NEVER COME ON WITH A CLIP.
>> NO, IT'S SO WEIRD TO BE OUT HERE TO PROMOTE SOMETHING. >> Jimmy: YEAH, YOU NEVER ARE.
>> NO, I'M NOT I'M JUST HANGING OUT WITH YOU. >> Jimmy: WAIT, THIS IS
HISTORY. WE'RE ACTUALLY THROWING TO A A CLIP
>> YEAH, THIS IS CRAZY [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: THIS IS A BIG DEAL
>> I'M ON THE "THE TONIGHT SHOW" GOING TO A CLIP. >> Jimmy: YEAH
HERE'S MICHAEL CHE IN HIS NEW SHOW, "THAT DAMN MICHAEL CHE," TAKE A LOOK.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
SORRY. >> IT'S COOL
I COULD BARELY SMELL IT. [ LAUGHTER ] >> WHAT?
OH, NO, NOT THAT UM, I MEAN, I'M SORRY FOR EVERYTHING GOING ON IN THE
COUNTRY. * [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
WITH THE POLICE SHOOTINGS AND ALL THE INJUSTICES AND FOR WHITE PRIVILEGE.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> THIS THING EVEN MOVE YET? >> I'M AN ALLY, OBVIOUSLY, SO
I'M NOT TRYING TO BE WEIRD >> THINK IT'S SUPPOSED TO LIGHT UP IF IT'S MOVING.
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: STUCK ON AN ELEVATOR MICHAEL CHE, EVERYBODY
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ALL EPISODES OF "THAT DAMN MICHAEL CHE" ARE STREAMING
MAY 6th ON HBO MAX WE'RE DOING "WHEEL OF OPINIONS" WITH MICHAEL CHE WHEN WE COME
BACK STICK AROUND, EVERYBODY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
* >> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK WE'RE HERE WITH MICHAEL CHE,
EVERYBODY! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE NOW, MICHAEL, YOU ARE A GREAT
COMEDIAN, AND PART OF YOUR JOB IS TO HAVE STRONG OPINIONS ABOUT ALL DIFFERENT KINDS OF
THINGS SO WITH THAT IN MIND IT'S TIME TO PLAY A GAME WE CALL "WHEEL
OF OPINIONS.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
* WHEEL OF OPINIONS * >> Jimmy: NOW, HERE'S HOW THIS WORKS.
I'M GOING TO HIT THIS BUTTON WHICH ACTIVATES THE OPINION TOPIC GENERATOR, OKAY?
IT WILL LAND ON A RANDOM TOPIC WHATEVER IT IS, YOU HAVE TO GIVE YOUR OPINION ON IT.
>> I'M WITH IT [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, HERE WE
GO [ BEEPING THE PHRASE -
>> OH. >> Jimmy: THE PHRASE "LET'S DO LUNCH.
>> I HATE THAT PHRASE, "LET'S DO LUNCH," BECAUSE IT'S USUALLY FOLLOWED BY "JUST SO I CAN PICK
YOUR BRAIN." [ LAUGHTER ] I HATE THAT IDEA THAT PEOPLE
THINK IF THEY BUY ME -- WHAT IS LUNCH? LIKE A SANDWICH AND A SALAD?
AND YOU WANT -- YOU WANT ME TO TELL YOU EVERYTHING THAT I KNOW ABOUT SHOW BUSINESS?
[ LAUGHTER ] FOR A SANDWICH >> Jimmy: PICK YOUR BRAIN.
>> I HATE PICK YOUR BRAIN. NO PASS
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: LET'S DO LUNCH >> I HATE THAT
[ BEEPING >> Jimmy: PINK LEMONADE. >> I DON'T KNOW -- OKAY.
I KNOW WHAT PINK LEMONADE IS, BUT I DON'T -- I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE PINK IS
>> Jimmy: NO, ME NEITHER [ LAUGHTER ] >> LEMONADE IS JUST LEMON.
>> Jimmy: YES. >> AND PINK LEMONADE TASTES DIFFERENT THAN REGULAR
LEMONADE >> Jimmy: IT DOES. >> BUT THEN WHAT IS THE PINK
BECAUSE IT'S NOT STRAWBERRY, BECAUSE THAT'S STRAWBERRY LEMONADE
[ LAUGHTER ] SO THEN WHAT IS THE PINK IN THE PINK LEMONADE?
>> Jimmy: WHAT IS PINK LEMONADE IT DOES HAVE A BIT OF A MORE
FLAVORFUL NAME >> YEAH, IT TASTES PINK, BUT I DON'T KNOW -
[ LAUGHTER ] I DON'T KNOW IF PINK IS -- FOR SOME REASON, PINK, PURPLE AND
RED HAS A FLAVOR AND WE DON'T KNOW WHERE THOSE COME FROM [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: LET'S GET ANOTHER TOPIC. HERE WE GO
[ BEEPING >> THIS IS RANDOM AS HELL. >> Jimmy: THEY'RE ALL --
BEES WHAT'S YOUR OPINION -- DO YOU HAVE AN OPINION ON BEES?
>> YEAH. KIND OF. SURE
FOR THE SAKE OF THIS GAME. [ LAUGHTER ] I DON'T -- OKAY.
HERE IS THE THING ABOUT BEES LIKE, THE WORLD IS GOING TO END BECAUSE THE BEES ARE GONE, AND
NOBODY PREDICTED THAT. WHY WOULDN'T THAT BE ONE OF THE COMMANDMENTS
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE WHY WOULDN'T THEY TELL US? LIKE, "OH, BY THE WAY, KEEP THE
BEES ALIVE OR IT'S OVER" [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: YEAH, THAT'S
INTERESTING. LIKE, NOSTRADAMUS -- NO ONE PREDICTED IT
>> YEAH, NO ONE SAID "THE BEES." WE JUST FOUND OUT WE GOT TO
KEEP THE BEES. [ LAUGHTER ] I LIKE TO THINK WHEN GOD COMES
BACK HE'S GOING TO BE LIKE, "WHERE ARE ALL THE - [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
I LEFT BILLIONS. >> Jimmy: YEAH, I INVENTED THIS SPACE.
>> IT'S ALL BEES THE WORLD IS GOING TO END BECAUSE OF THE BEES.
>> Jimmy: THAT'S SUCH A GREAT OPINION ON BEES. I HAD NO IDEA YOU WERE GOING TO
GO THERE WOW. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
I WAS LIKE, "I LIKE THEM, I HATE THEM, THEY STING. >> I GOT STRONG OPINIONS ABOUT
STUFF THAT NO ONE CARES ABOUT. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: LET'S TRY MORE
WHY NOT? [ BEEPING PEOPLE WHO END E-MAILS WITH
"THOUGHTS? [ LAUGHTER ] OH, THAT'S NOT FAIR.
THAT'S COMING FROM -- BECAUSE I DO THAT, DUDE. >> DO YOU REALLY
>> Jimmy: YEAH >> OH, THAT SUCKS. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: COME ON. >> THAT'S LIKE THE SECOND WORST THING.
YOU KNOW WHAT I ALSO HATE THAT'S IN THE SAME VEIN? I HATE WHEN PEOPLE SAY, "ALL
RIGHT?" ON AN ANSWERING MACHINE. LIKE, I CAN'T TELL YOU IT'S ALL
RIGHT. [ LAUGHTER ] "ALL RIGHT, I'LL TALK TO YOU
LATER, ALL RIGHT ALL RIGHT, BYE." I HATE THAT.
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: YOU'RE NOT TALKING BACK
>> YEAH. THOUGHTS IS -- I DON'T -- YOU KNOW, E-MAILS, IT'S LIKE, "I
DON'T WANT TO GIVE YOU MY THOUGHTS." >> Jimmy: YEAH
>> THAT'S THE WHOLE REASON FOR AN E-MAIL, IT'S LIKE INFORMAL SO YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M
THINKING I'M JUST GOING TO GIVE YOU WHATEVER THE THREE RESPONSES
ARE AT THE BOTTOM OF GMAIL [ LAUGHTER ] I'M JUST GOING TO GIVE YOU ONE
OF THOSE [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: LET'S DO ONE MORE,
PLEASE YOUR FINAL TOPIC IS -- [ BEEPING
[ AUDIENCE OHs ] [ LAUGHTER ] >> DOES ONE OF THOSE SAY TOE
RINGS? >> Jimmy: YEAH, I SAW THAT TOO YEAH, YEAH
[ LAUGHTER ] WHAT'S YOUR OPINION, QUICKLY, ON TOE RINGS
>> OH, I DON'T - [ LAUGHTER ] I WEAR SHOES, SO -
I'M WEARING TEN RIGHT NOW, BUT -- [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: ONE ON EACH TOE? >> YEAH, MAN I DON'T WANT KIDS.
I WANT ADULTS. [ LAUGHTER ] [ LAUGHTER ]
I WANT ADULTS. I DON'T WANT -- I HAVE NO INTEREST IN THE KID PART OF
YOUR LIFE. I DON'T KNOW WHEN PEOPLE GOT SO OBSESSED WITH KIDS
I HAVE FRIENDS WHO HAVE KIDS THEY WERE WEIRD. [ LAUGHTER ]
AND YOU GO INTO THEIR HOUSE AND THERE'S LIKE TOYS IN THE COUCH AND IT DRIVES ME -- SINCE WHEN
ARE KIDS ALLOWED IN THE LIVING ROOM [ LAUGHTER ]
WHEN DID THAT START? >> Jimmy: THEY RUN IT. >> YEAH, THEY'RE LIKE, "OH, DO
YOU WANT TO PLAY WITH DYLAN? NO, I'M A DRUNK MAN. WHY WOULD I WANT TO PLAY WITH
DYLAN? [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: MICHAEL CHE,
EVERYBODY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ALL EPISODES OF "THAT DAMN
MICHAEL CHE" ARE STREAMING MAY 6th ON HBO MAX OH, MY GOODNESS.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE "TONIGHT SHOW," EVERYBODY. I'M A GROWN MAN, I DON'T WANT
TO PLAY WITH - [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
>> Jimmy: OUR NEXT GUEST IS A WORLD FAMOUS SUPERMODEL WHO HAS A BRAND-NEW WELLNESS LINE
CALLED "FOUND ACTIVE." PLEASE WELCOME KATE UPTON!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
* >> Jimmy: THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.
HEY. I'M SO HAPPY THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMING
ON IT IS ALWAYS GREAT TO SEE YOU, BUD.
>> IT'S SO GREAT TO BE ON. I MISS BEING IN STUDIO >> Jimmy: I KNOW
>> I'M NOT SURE IF I MISS YOU OR THE MILKBAR BIRTHDAY TRUFFLES THAT YOU HAVE
BACKSTAGE. >> Jimmy: YEAH YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'LL MAIL SOME TO YOU. I'LL MAKE SURE YOU GET OUR BACKSTAGE STUFF.
PLEASE >> I WOULD LOVE THAT >> Jimmy: HOW IS THE -- HOW'S
THE FAMILY I KNOW YOUR BEAUTIFUL LITTLE DAUGHTER, GENEVIEVE, EVERYONE
DOING WELL EVERYONE'S SAFE? >> EVERYONE'S DOING SO WELL.
>> Jimmy: THERE'S A NEW MEMBER OF THE FAMILY, A LITTLE PUPPY NAMED NORMAN
AND I REALLY WANT TO ASK YOU ABOUT NORMAN >> I KNOW.
NORMAN IS SO CUTE! BUT I DID FORGET HOW HARD IT IS TO HAVE A PUPPY AND LIKE,
ARGUABLY IT MIGHT BE HARDER THAN HAVING A NEWBORN. AND HERE HE IS
>> Jimmy: I TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU, BY THE WAY. YES, I THINK IT IS
I THINK HAVING A BABY IS IN A WEIRD WAY A BIT EASIER THAN A PUPPY.
>> YEAH, BECAUSE YOU CAN PUT A A DIAPER ON. >> Jimmy: THANK YOU.
>> AND ALSO PEOPLE CARE. THEY'RE LIKE, "OH, NO, YOU'RE PROBABLY SO TIRED, YOU HAVE
A NEWBORN CHILD. BUT WITH NORMAN, PEOPLE ARE LIKE, "OH, YOU HAVE A PUPPY,
THAT'S CUTE. OKAY, ANYWAY, LET'S MOVE IT ALONG.
I'M LIKE, "NO, I'M EXHAUSTED." AND HE PEES EVERYWHERE >> Jimmy: HE PEES EVERYWHERE
OH, MY GOSH. BUT HE'S SO CUTE OH, MY GOSH.
IS THAT -- DOES THE BABY LIKE NORMAN >> OH, SHE LOVES NORMAN, BUT
ALSO SHE'S KIND OF A MEAN GIRL TO NORMAN BECAUSE THEY'RE KIND OF THE SAME AGE IN A WEIRD WAY
>> Jimmy: AH >> WHERE HE KEEPS WANTING TO LIKE PLAY WITH HER AND PLAY
WITH ALL OF HER TOYS AND SHE'S JUST LIKE, "NO, DON'T HANG OUT WITH ME.
YOU'RE NOT COOL ENOUGH." >> Jimmy: OH, MY GOSH. HOW DID YOU CELEBRATE HER
BIRTHDAY, HER 2-YEAR-OLD BIRTHDAY DID YOU GO ALL OUT OR TINY
>> I MEAN HER BIRTHDAY IS IN NOVEMBER, SO AT THE TIME LIKE WE REALLY COULDN'T GO ALL OUT.
>> Jimmy: YEAH >> BUT WE WENT ALL OUT FOR OURSELVES BECAUSE WE INVITED
OUR SIBLINGS AND OUR PARENTS, AND THEN WENT TO AN AMAZING PLACE THAT WE WANTED TO GO TO
AND THEN THROUGH HER RODEO BIRTHDAY, WHICH I LOVE HORSES SO IT SEEMS TO BE REALLY
POINTED TO THINGS I LIKE [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: YEAH, I DON'T KNOW IF
A 2-YEAR-OLD IS REALLY RIDING HORSES AT THAT AGE, YEAH IT IS LIKE, OH, MY
THAT'S SO RIDICULOUS >> I KNOW, I KNOW. SHE DOES LOVE HORSES THOUGH,
AND I'M SLOWLY AM BRAINWASHING HER, BUT I WANT TO SAY THAT IT IS GENETIC BUT IT JUST HAPPENS
>> Jimmy: BUT, YEAH -- YOUR HUSBAND IS HOUSTON ASTROS' PITCHER JUSTIN VERLANDER -- AN
AMAZING ATHLETE. PLEASE TELL HIM I SAID HI. HOW IS HE AS A DAD WITH
A 2-YEAR-OLD >> OH, HE'S THE BEST DAD I MEAN HE REALLY IS.
HE HELPS -- HE IS ALWAYS SO INVOLVED HE IS THE BEST PARTNER
>> Jimmy: YEAH >> HE'S JUST NOT THE BEST DOG DAD.
LIKE HE HAS HELPED ALMOST ZERO WITH NORMAN, BUT HE TOOK ALMOST EVERY NIGHT SHIFT WITH BEBE.
SO, I STILL AM A LITTLE BITTER ABOUT THAT [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: I FEEL LIKE NORMAN -- YEAH, NORMAN'S A BIG PROBLEM THIS IS A BIG ISSUE WITH
NORMAN >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: HE'S A TROUBLE PUPPY,
MAN. >> YEAH, EXACTLY >> Jimmy: YEAH
DOES JUSTIN SHOW HER -- HIM THROWING THE BASEBALL OR HOW TO HOLD THE BASEBALL OR HIGHLIGHT
FILMS OR SHE'S TOO LITTLE? >> NO, HE HAS BEEN SHOWING HER LOTS OF HIGHLIGHT FILMS.
AND I'M NOT SURE IF HE'S SHOWING HER HIGHLIGHT FILMS BECAUSE HE'S NOT PLAYING RIGHT
NOW OR IF IT IS BECAUSE I THINK SHE THINKS HE'S ACTUALLY A A GOLFER
LIKE SHE'S SEEN HIM GOLF MORE THAN SHE'S SEEN HIM PLAY BASEBALL
>> Jimmy: YEAH, YEAH, YEAH YEAH >> AND SO WHEN WE WERE WATCHING
THE MASTERS THE OTHER DAY, SHE WAS LIKE, "DADDY DADDY!
I WAS LIKE - >> Jimmy: NO >> "NO, THAT'S NOT WHAT HE
DOES HE'S NOT THAT GOOD." [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: KATE, YOU KNOW, IT HAS BEEN AROUND 15 YEARS SINCE YOU STARTED MODELLING.
YOU'VE DONE AMAZING SHOOTS WE HAVE TALKED ABOUT IT IN THE PAST
IS THERE ANYTHING THAT YOU'D STILL LIKE TO TRY THAT YOU HAVEN'T DONE
>> I MEAN I'VE DONE A LOT OF DIFFERENT SHOOTS >> Jimmy: I KNOW
>> I FEEL LIKE -- I KIND OF JUST WANT TO DO A BORING STUDIO SHOOT, LIKE NOT DO ZERO
GRAVITY, NOT GO TO ANTARCTICA. >> Jimmy: YOU REMEMBER THE ZERO GRAVITY!
IT WAS A CLASSIC I WANT TO SAY I HAD SOME CREDIT FOR THAT ONE
>> YES, LIKE I DON'T WANT TO GO ON THE VOMIT COMET AS THEY CALLED IT.
I'M LIKE, WHY ARE YOU SIGNING ME UP FOR THAT [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: BUT THAT WAS A A CLASSIC, THAT WAS A CLASSIC PHOTO.
>> I KNOW. >> Jimmy: YOU WANT A NORMAL, BORING, BORING PHOTO SHOOT
>> YEAH. LIKE I WOULD LOVE TO BE A PART OF A PHOTO SHOOT THAT SOMEONE
IS JUST LIKE, "OH, JUMP, JUST SMILE. >> Jimmy: JUMP AND SMILE
>> BUT I THOUGHT I HAD A NORMAL STUDIO SHOOT, AND THEN THEY BROUGHT AN INDOOR RAIN MACHINE
AND WIND MACHINE SO THEY COULD BRING ALL OF THE ELEMENTS TO ME INSIDE
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: BECAUSE YOU'RE FUN BECAUSE YOU'RE FUN, KATE
THAT'S WHY THEY LIKE TO DO THIS WITH YOU, BECAUSE YOU'RE FUN AND YOU LIKE TO DO THOSE THINGS
AND YOU HAVE VIRAL MOMENTS >> YEAH, I THINK I DO LOSE IT A LITTLE BIT ONSET
YOU KNOW, LIKE IF YOU'RE ON ANTARCTICA, YOU HAVE HYPOTHERMIA AND YOU LOSE IT AND
FINALLY YOU'RE JUST DANCING OR - >> Jimmy: BUT YOU HAVE THIS --
I WILL SAY YOU HAVE THIS NEW WELLNESS LINE CALLED "FOUND ACTIVE."
OKAY >> YES >> Jimmy: NOW YOU HAVE TO DO A
A PHOTO SHOOT FOR THIS, AND I SAW THIS MOVIE -- THIS VIDEO -- I'M CALLING IT A MOVIE, ON YOUR
INSTAGRAM. AND I FOUND IT VERY INTERESTING CAUSE YOU HAD TO DO A SHOOT AND
YOU ARE IN COVID TIME, SO I WANT EVERYONE TO TAKE A LOOK AT THIS
HERE'S KATE UPTON.
AGAINST IT A LITTLE BIT, EVEN LOWER.
LIKE BELOW YOUR NECK BELOW YOUR CHIN AND EVERYTHING YEAH, JUST LIKE SUPER CASUAL
>> Jimmy: SO, WAIT SO THAT -- SO THE PHOTOGRAPHER IS THERE
[ APPLAUSE ] >> YEAH, HE WAS ON FACETIME HELPING WITH IT.
BUT MY NANNY, LIZZIE, WAS TELLING ME, SHE WAS LIKE, "I REALLY A GOOD AT PHOTOGRAPHY
I THINK I'M PRETTY GOOD WITH THE iPHONE." AND I WAS LIKE, "THAT'S GREAT.
YOU WANT TO SHOOT A CAMPAIGN." [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: WHY NOT?
YEAH YEAH >> YEAH, CAUSE OBVIOUSLY I
CAN'T TRUST JUSTIN WITH A CAMERA SO IT WAS LIZZIE
>> Jimmy: AND OBVIOUSLY CAN'T TRUST NORMAN >> NO, NORMAN.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: NORMAN IS SO BAD KATE UPTON, EVERYBODY!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE FOR MORE INFORMATION ABOUT "FOUND ACTIVE" CHECK OUT
FOUNDACTIVE.COM. MORE "TONIGHT SHOW" AFTER THE BREAK.
STICK AROUND KATE UPTON KATE, WE LOVE YOU.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> Jimmy: OUR NEXT GUEST IS AN
ARGENTINIAN SUPERSTAR WHO IS MAKING HER U.S. TV DEBUT, PERFORMING "WAPO TRAKETERO" AND
"NO TOQUE MI NAIK" WITH SPECIAL GUEST LUNAY, HERE IS NICKI NICOLE
[ SINGING IN SPANISH ] * *
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: JOIN US TOMORROW NIGHT.
LUKE BRYAN AND BRIAN REGAN WILL BE HERE, AND WE'LL HAVE POETRY FROM RUPI KAUR
MY THANKS TO MICHAEL CHE, KATE UPTON, NICKI NICOLE, LUNAY AND THE ROOTS.
THANK YOU FOR WATCHING STAY TUNED FOR "LATE NIGHT WITH SETH MYERS."