1 00:00:25,079 --> 00:00:27,648 FROM ROCKEFELLER CENTER, IN THE HEART OF NEW YORK CITY, 2 00:00:27,648 --> 00:00:31,585 IT'S "THE TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON." TONIGHT JOIN JIMMY AND HIS 3 00:00:31,585 --> 00:00:36,390 GUESTS, JERRY SEINFELD BAD BUNNY, AND FEATURING THE LEGENDARY 4 00:00:36,390 --> 00:00:41,629 ROOTS CREW, AND NOW HERE HE IS, JIMMY FALLON 5 00:00:48,069 --> 00:00:53,908 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE Jimmy: HELLO. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 6 00:00:53,908 --> 00:00:59,914 THANK YOU, ROOTS * OH, PLEASE, THANK YOU VERY 7 00:00:59,914 --> 00:01:04,485 MUCH WELCOME TO THE SHOW, EVERYBODY THANK YOU. 8 00:01:04,485 --> 00:01:13,094 WELCOME, WELCOME, WELCOME TO "THE TONIGHT SHOW. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 9 00:01:13,094 --> 00:01:16,197 LET ME START BY WISHING EVERYONE A VERY HAPPY THANKSGIVING 10 00:01:16,197 --> 00:01:21,335 YEAH [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THAT'S RIGHT, WE MADE IT 11 00:01:21,335 --> 00:01:23,738 THROUGH THANKSGIVING, AND IF YOUR GUESTS ARE STILL OVER, JUST REMIND THEM THEY SHOULDN'T 12 00:01:23,738 --> 00:01:29,844 HAVE BEEN THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE. [ LAUGHTER ] 13 00:01:29,844 --> 00:01:31,712 THIS IS A VERY DIFFERENT THANKSGIVING WE ALL HAD TO WORRY ABOUT 14 00:01:31,712 --> 00:01:36,751 WHETHER OUR LIVES ARE AT STAKE IN RESPONSE, THE TURKEYS WERE LIKE "OH, THAT MUST HAVE BEEN 15 00:01:36,751 --> 00:01:42,990 SO HARD FOR YOU. [ LAUGHTER ] [ APPLAUSE ] 16 00:01:42,990 --> 00:01:46,293 I SPENT THE DAY WATCHING A LOT OF THANKSGIVING STUFF ON TV. THERE WAS THE "MACY'S 17 00:01:46,293 --> 00:01:49,630 THANKSGIVING PARADE" THAT WE WERE IN. THAT'S RIGHT 18 00:01:49,630 --> 00:01:54,402 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE "CHARLIE BROWN THANKSGIVING" AND OVER ON NETFLIX, MY NEW 19 00:01:54,402 --> 00:02:04,512 FAVORITE, "THE QUEEN'S GIBLET. [ LAUGHTER ] YEAH, TODAY WAS THANKSGIVING 20 00:02:04,512 --> 00:02:06,714 IT WAS A BIG DAY FOR THAT ONE SERVING TRAY EVERYONE OWNS THAT HAS THE WORD "THANKFUL," 21 00:02:06,714 --> 00:02:10,217 WRITTEN ON IT. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] WE HAD A SMALL THANKSGIVING 22 00:02:10,217 --> 00:02:13,487 THIS YEAR, 'CAUSE IN NEW YORK ANYTHING MORE THAN FOUR PEOPLE, GOVERNOR CUOMO SHOWS UP TO YOUR 23 00:02:13,487 --> 00:02:17,892 HOUSE WITH A TASER [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] THERE WERE SOME THINGS THAT I 24 00:02:17,892 --> 00:02:19,627 MISSED ABOUT HAVING MY ENTIRE FAMILY OVER, LIKE, MY AUNT SHOWING UP WITH A TWO-LITER 25 00:02:19,627 --> 00:02:24,965 BOTTLE OF CHARDONNAY [ LAUGHTER ] [ SLURRED 26 00:02:24,965 --> 00:02:27,101 "IT'S FROM THE REGISTER OF TRADER JOE'S IT'S GOOD STUFF. 27 00:02:27,101 --> 00:02:32,106 [ LAUGHTER ] I ALSO MISS WHEN MY UNCLE OPENS HIS SEVENTH BEER AND HE'S LIKE, 28 00:02:32,106 --> 00:02:34,475 "SO, STILL TELLING YOUR LITTLE KNOCK-KNOCK JOKES ON THE TV? [ LAUGHTER ] 29 00:02:34,475 --> 00:02:41,682 [ APPLAUSE ] BUT I ENDED UP HAVING A NICE DAY, RIGHT UP UNTIL MY KIDS 30 00:02:41,682 --> 00:02:44,318 SAID THAT THEY WERE MOST THANKFUL FOR DADDY GOING BACK TO THE OFFICE. 31 00:02:44,318 --> 00:02:48,289 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] AND THIS IS INTERESTING. I READ THAT BECAUSE OF SMALLER 32 00:02:48,289 --> 00:02:52,193 GATHERINGS THIS YEAR, A LOT OF AMERICANS ALSO WANTED SMALLER TURKEYS. 33 00:02:52,193 --> 00:02:53,961 WHEN THEY HEARD THAT, ALL THE TURKEYS WHO WENT KETO THIS MONTH WERE LIKE, "MAN, THAT 34 00:02:53,961 --> 00:03:02,136 REALLY BACKFIRED, HUH? [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE THAT'S RIGHT, SMALLER TURKEYS 35 00:03:02,136 --> 00:03:04,605 WERE HARD TO FIND. TODAY, PIGEONS IN NEW YORK WERE LIKE, "WHY ARE YOU LOOKING AT 36 00:03:04,605 --> 00:03:09,243 ME LIKE THAT." [ LAUGHTER ] IT WAS FUN COOKING THE TURKEY 37 00:03:09,243 --> 00:03:12,747 THIS YEAR. PEOPLE CHECKED WHETHER IT WAS DONE BY USING ONE OF THOSE 38 00:03:12,747 --> 00:03:15,983 FOREHEAD THERMOMETERS. [ LAUGHTER ] THEN JUST TO BE SAFE, THEY GAVE 39 00:03:15,983 --> 00:03:19,520 THE BUD A QUICK NASAL SWAB I MEAN, IT'S FOR FUN COME ON. 40 00:03:19,520 --> 00:03:21,489 [ LAUGHTER ] SOME PEOPLE TRIED TO BE SAFE BY EATING OUTSIDE, HOWEVER IT 41 00:03:21,489 --> 00:03:26,093 RAINED IN A LOT OF THE COUNTRY TODAY. PEOPLE WERE SMART, SO THEY 42 00:03:26,093 --> 00:03:30,598 RENTED TENTS, AND WHEN IT GOT WINDY, THEY ADDED WALLS, AND WHEN THEY WERE FINISHED, THEY 43 00:03:30,598 --> 00:03:33,934 REALIZED THEY WERE EATING INSIDE [ LAUGHTER ] 44 00:03:33,934 --> 00:03:39,106 OF COURSE, A LOT OF PEOPLE DECIDED TO CELEBRATE OVER ZOOM AND NOW IT'S CLEAR WHY NOBODY 45 00:03:39,106 --> 00:03:42,910 EVER EATS YAM SIX INCHES FROM A MICROPHONE [ LAUGHTER ] 46 00:03:42,910 --> 00:03:46,747 MEANWHILE, I SAW THAT THE TSA ALLOWED SOME THANKSGIVING FOOD TO BE BROUGHT THROUGH SECURITY 47 00:03:46,747 --> 00:03:50,017 YEP. NOTHING BETTER ON A LONG FLIGHT THAN SITTING NEXT TO A GUY WITH 48 00:03:50,017 --> 00:03:55,156 THREE TUPPERWARE'S FULL OF CREAMED ONIONS [ LAUGHTER ] 49 00:03:55,156 --> 00:03:59,293 AND FINALLY, SINCE TODAY IS THANKSGIVING, THAT MEANS TOMORROW IS BLACK FRIDAY 50 00:03:59,293 --> 00:04:03,130 AND I SAW THAT 'CAUSE OF THE PANDEMIC, A LOT OF STORES ARE OFFERING DEALS ONLINE. 51 00:04:03,130 --> 00:04:04,899 OF COURSE, IF YOU WANT TO GET THE FULL BLACK FRIDAY EXPERIENCE, JUST PUNCH YOURSELF 52 00:04:04,899 --> 00:04:09,270 IN THE FACE BEFORE YOU CLICK "ADD TO CART." [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 53 00:04:09,270 --> 00:04:14,508 WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW, GIVE IT UP FOR THE ROOTS, EVERYBODY. * 54 00:04:14,508 --> 00:04:26,787 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE HAPPY THANKSGIVING, EVERYONE WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU 55 00:04:26,787 --> 00:04:31,258 TONIGHT. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE OH 56 00:04:31,258 --> 00:04:37,164 HIS NEW BOOK, "IS THIS ANYTHING," IS OUT NOW. JERRY SEINFELD IS MY GUEST 57 00:04:37,164 --> 00:04:40,668 TONIGHT. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ALSO, HE WAS JUST NOMINATED FOR 58 00:04:40,668 --> 00:04:43,604 TWO GRAMMYS, AND HE HAS A BRAND NEW ALBUM COMING OUT WE'RE GONNA TALK ABOUT IT 59 00:04:43,604 --> 00:04:47,308 TONIGHT. BAD BUNNY IS HERE. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 60 00:04:47,308 --> 00:04:50,845 WE'RE TALKING TO HIM, AND HE'S PERFORMING LATER ON IN THE SHOW 61 00:04:50,845 --> 00:04:55,182 IT'S A VERY, VERY EXCITING DAY TO DO THIS SINCE IT IS THANKSGIVING, IT'S 62 00:04:55,182 --> 00:04:58,252 ALL ABOUT GIVING THANKS. SO, I THOUGHT WHAT BETTER WAY THAN TO WRITE OUT MY WEEKLY 63 00:04:58,252 --> 00:05:01,856 THANK YOU NOTES RIGHT NOW. DO YOU GUYS MIND [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 64 00:05:01,856 --> 00:05:11,165 JAMES, CAN I GET SOME THANK YOU NOTE WRITING MUSIC, PLEASE * 65 00:05:11,165 --> 00:05:12,800 THANK YOU, WHITE HOUSE THANKSGIVING, FOR BEING THE ONE PLACE WHERE YOU CAN SEE 66 00:05:12,800 --> 00:05:25,146 A TURKEY GET EATEN BY A LAME DUCK [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 67 00:05:25,146 --> 00:05:28,649 THANK YOU, THE FIRST THANKSGIVING, FOR BEING HELD AT PLYMOUTH ROCK AND THANK YOU 68 00:05:28,649 --> 00:05:33,788 RUDY GIULIANI'S THANKSGIVING FOR BEING HELD AT PLYMOUTH ROCK TOTAL LANDSCAPING. 69 00:05:33,788 --> 00:05:48,002 [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE THANK YOU, PATTI LaBELLE'S SWEET POTATO PIE, FOR LETTING 70 00:05:48,002 --> 00:05:52,373 ME KNOW IT'S OKAY TO EAT YOU THE WAY I EAT MOST PIES. * ON MY OWN * 71 00:05:52,373 --> 00:06:01,048 [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE THANK YOU, THE PARADES, OR AS I LIKE TO CALL YOU, THE HAPPY 72 00:06:01,048 --> 00:06:11,258 TRAFFIC. [ APPLAUSE ] THANK YOU, CANDIED YAMS, FOR 73 00:06:11,258 --> 00:06:25,139 MAKING CHILDREN EVERYWHERE LOSE FAITH IN CANDY [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 74 00:06:25,139 --> 00:06:36,751 THANK YOU, PILGRIMS, FOR BEING GOTH LEPRECHAUNS [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 75 00:06:36,751 --> 00:06:38,486 THANK YOU, DEEP FRYING A A TURKEY, FOR BEING THE MOST DELICIOUS WAY TO ACCIDENTALLY 76 00:06:38,486 --> 00:06:42,957 LIGHT YOUR ENTIRE HOUSE ON FIRE THERE YOU HAVE IT, EVERYBODY 77 00:06:42,957 --> 00:06:46,594 [ APPLAUSE ] THOSE ARE OUR THANK YOU NOTES. HAPPY THANKSGIVING 78 00:06:46,594 --> 00:06:51,932 WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK, WITH JERRY SEINFELD [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 79 00:06:51,932 --> 00:07:12,219 * Jimmy: MY FIRST GUEST IS ONE OF MY ALL TIME FAVORITE 80 00:07:12,219 --> 00:07:16,924 COMEDIANS. HE HAS A NEW BOOK CALLED "IS THIS ANYTHING? 81 00:07:16,924 --> 00:07:20,628 WHICH IS FILLED WITH 45 YEARS WORTH OF HIS STAND UP MATERIAL AND IT IS SO GOOD. 82 00:07:20,628 --> 00:07:24,065 LIKE THE BEST STAND UP MATERIAL YOU CAN READ THIS, AND EVEN IF 83 00:07:24,065 --> 00:07:27,101 YOU ARE NOT FUNNY, YOU SOUND FUNNY. THAT'S HOW GOOD IT IS. 84 00:07:27,101 --> 00:07:31,806 BEFORE WE SAY HELLO TO JERRY, PLEASE TAKE A LOOK AT THIS ICONIC MOMENT FROM HIS CAREER. 85 00:07:31,806 --> 00:07:37,178 HERE HE IS THROWING OUT THE FIRST PITCH AT CITI FIELD LAST YEAR 86 00:07:37,178 --> 00:07:37,211 FIRST PITCH AT CITI FIELD LAST YEAR 87 00:07:38,612 --> 00:07:39,880 HE DOES THE TURK WENDELL MOVE, SLAMMING THE JACKET DOWN 88 00:07:39,880 --> 00:07:41,482 THEN WITH THE EXAGGERATED WIND UP, COME SIDEARM LIKE TERRY LEACH, AND THROWS 89 00:07:41,482 --> 00:07:49,623 A PERFECT STRIKE VERY NICE Jimmy: HERE HE IS, 90 00:07:49,623 --> 00:07:53,994 JERRY SEINFIELD EVERYBODY! JIMMY, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU SHOWED THAT. 91 00:07:53,994 --> 00:07:57,698 THAT'S MY FAVORITE THING Jimmy: I ALWAYS MESS UP YOUR INTRO. 92 00:07:57,698 --> 00:07:59,333 I FIGURED I GIVE YOU FOR THANKSGIVING THIS YEAR, YOU'RE ALWAYS -- IT'S AN ODD 93 00:07:59,333 --> 00:08:04,805 TRADITION, BUT IT'S FUN. YOU ARE ALWAYS HERE ON THANKSGIVING 94 00:08:04,805 --> 00:08:10,277 YES, I LOVE ALWAYS BEING WITH YOU ON THANKSGIVING ON TV BECAUSE WE DON'T WANT REAL 95 00:08:10,277 --> 00:08:13,647 THANKSGIVING WE WANT TV THANKSGIVING. RIGHT? 96 00:08:13,647 --> 00:08:16,751 THAT'S WHAT WE LIKE. Jimmy: YEAH WHAT WOULD WE DO -- NO WHAT 97 00:08:16,751 --> 00:08:18,786 WOULD WE DO AT A REAL THANKSGIVING NO 98 00:08:18,786 --> 00:08:21,622 NO, YOU GOT TO LAUGH AT REAL THANKSGIVING, WHAT THE HELL GOOD IS IT 99 00:08:21,622 --> 00:08:24,191 Jimmy: YEAH, NO THIS IS EXACTLY -- YOU WANT A LAUGH THAT MEANS 100 00:08:24,191 --> 00:08:29,630 MONEY IN THE BANK. Jimmy: THANK YOU. YOU KNOW ME SO WELL. 101 00:08:29,630 --> 00:08:32,466 I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE BOOK, BUT FIRST, HOW'S THE FAMILY? AND HOW'S JESSICA? 102 00:08:32,466 --> 00:08:35,836 HOW'S SASHA? THEY'RE ALL GOOD ALL GOOD. 103 00:08:35,836 --> 00:08:38,072 THANK YOU FOR ASKING HOW ABOUT YOURS? Jimmy: THEY'RE GREAT. 104 00:08:38,072 --> 00:08:41,308 THEY'RE CUTE IT'S AWESOME BUT I MEAN MY KIDS ARE LITTLE. 105 00:08:41,308 --> 00:08:45,713 I MEAN YOUR KIDS ARE - THEY'RE STILL YOUR KIDS DON'T DIMINISH THEM BECAUSE 106 00:08:45,713 --> 00:08:49,083 THEY'RE YOUNG. Jimmy: I KNOW, BUT THEY WON'T SEE THIS 107 00:08:49,083 --> 00:08:53,087 I WILL SHOW THEM THIS UNTIL THEY'RE OLDER. THEY'RE FIVE AND SEVEN RIGHT 108 00:08:53,087 --> 00:08:56,390 NOW. OH, THAT'S NICE Jimmy: BUT YOUR KIDS ARE 17 109 00:08:56,390 --> 00:08:58,926 THEY'RE TEENAGERS. TWENTIES 17, 15 AND 20 110 00:08:58,926 --> 00:09:01,529 YEAH Jimmy: WOW, YOU SO 20-YEARS-OLD 111 00:09:01,529 --> 00:09:06,767 HOW IS IT WITH TEENAGERS AND OLDER KIDS THE GREATEST. 112 00:09:06,767 --> 00:09:08,302 IT ONLY GETS BETTER, EVERYTHING GETS BETTER. AND I LIKE TEENAGERS A LOT 113 00:09:08,302 --> 00:09:17,812 BECAUSE OF THE HOSTILITY, THEY'RE GREAT DEBATERS THEY'LL FIGHT YOU. 114 00:09:17,812 --> 00:09:23,084 THEY WILL BREAK DOWN YOUR FLAWS AND YOUR LOGIC SO, IT REALLY WORKS BETTER FOR 115 00:09:23,084 --> 00:09:29,523 ME JESSICA WAS A GREAT MOM, BUT I REALLY WANT TO ENGAGE MORE, UH, 116 00:09:29,523 --> 00:09:35,096 SYNTACTICALLY. Jimmy: DO YOU GET INTO GOOD DEBATES WITH THE KIDS? 117 00:09:35,096 --> 00:09:38,065 SURE, ALL THE TIME. IT'S CONSTANT. WELL I -- THE PROBLEM WITH, YOU 118 00:09:38,065 --> 00:09:42,770 KNOW, MARRIED LIFE I THINK FOR A MAN, FOR A HUSBAND, IS THE AMOUNT OF ROOM FOR YOU TO 119 00:09:42,770 --> 00:09:48,309 COMPLAIN JUST GETS SMALLER Jimmy: YEAH 'CAUSE IT GETS TAKEN UP BY 120 00:09:48,309 --> 00:09:53,080 THE OTHER PEOPLE Jimmy: COMPLAINING, YEAH. THERE IS ONLY SO MUCH 121 00:09:53,080 --> 00:09:59,487 COMPLAINING THAT CAN HAPPEN. YEAH, I AM LUCKY TO GET IN A, "WHERE'S THE REMOTE?" 122 00:09:59,487 --> 00:10:03,290 THAT'S AS MUCH AS I CAN COMPLAIN Jimmy: YEAH, BECAUSE YOU 123 00:10:03,290 --> 00:10:06,027 MADE THESE HUMANS, AND THEY HAVE TO COMPLAIN CAN YOU PUT IT BACK IN THE 124 00:10:06,027 --> 00:10:10,631 CHARGER WHEN YOU'RE DONE WITH IT Jimmy: YOU THINK? 125 00:10:10,631 --> 00:10:12,333 JESSICA SENT OUT A FUNNY POST DURING QUARANTINE SAID, "BECAUSE THAT YOU HAVE NOWHERE 126 00:10:12,333 --> 00:10:23,511 TO PERFORM RIGHT NOW YOU WALK AROUND ALL DAY YELLING." [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 127 00:10:23,511 --> 00:10:26,047 I THINK THAT'S ACCURATE? DO YOU YELL WHEN YOU TALK IN THE HOUSE? 128 00:10:26,047 --> 00:10:29,750 OF COURES YOU DO Jimmy: YEAH, YOU HAVE TO. THERE'S NO ONE ELSE. 129 00:10:29,750 --> 00:10:31,285 YOU WANT TO USE YOUR STAGE VOICE BECAUSE I AM NOT USING IT 130 00:10:31,285 --> 00:10:35,656 I AM USING IT VOICE RIGHT NOW, BUT NOBODY WANTS TO HEAR THIS VOLUME FOR - 131 00:10:35,656 --> 00:10:40,561 [ LAUGHTER ] Jimmy: FOR ALL DAY LONG ARE YOU DONE WITH THE MAPLE 132 00:10:40,561 --> 00:10:42,963 SYRUP? THEN PUT IT BACK IN THE MIDDLE OF THE TABLE, SO I CAN REACH 133 00:10:42,963 --> 00:10:49,003 IT Jimmy: I JUST SAID THAT REALLY MAD ME LAUGH, BECAUSE I 134 00:10:49,003 --> 00:10:53,140 DO IT ALL THE TIME I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE NEW BOOK 135 00:10:53,140 --> 00:10:56,577 "IS THIS ANYTHING? "IS THIS ANYTHING? YEAH, I LOVE THE WAY YOU 136 00:10:56,577 --> 00:10:59,313 SAID IT. BECAUSE THAT'S HOW WE SAY IT Jimmy: RIGHT, THAT'S THE 137 00:10:59,313 --> 00:11:01,315 TITLE. -- YEAH Jimmy: YOU HAVE AN IDEA FOR 138 00:11:01,315 --> 00:11:07,722 A BIT AND YOU GO, "HEY, IS THIS ANYTHING"? YEAH. 139 00:11:07,722 --> 00:11:12,727 Jimmy: AND WHAT DO WE HOPE THE PEOPLE SAY YOU HOPE THEY LAUGH, BUT YOU 140 00:11:12,727 --> 00:11:17,331 HAVE TO SAY SOMETHING. THIS SAYS, "HERE, BIT COMING HERE COMES A BIT." 141 00:11:17,331 --> 00:11:21,602 Jimmy: YES, THAT'S TRUE YOU CAN'T JUST GO INTO IT SOMETIMES YOU CAN BUT -- 142 00:11:21,602 --> 00:11:26,207 Jimmy: THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO DO NANCY AND I CAN'T -- 143 00:11:26,207 --> 00:11:31,479 I HAVE TO SAY I HAVE THAT IDEA FOR A BIT, AND THEN I DO IT. BECAUSE IF I JUST TRY TO GET 144 00:11:31,479 --> 00:11:33,748 INTO IT, IT'S TOO WEIRD. AND SHE'S LIKE, "WAIT, WHY DON'T YOU TALK ABOUT GOLF OR 145 00:11:33,748 --> 00:11:36,250 SOMETHING? I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS TRYING TO JOKE. 146 00:11:36,250 --> 00:11:39,220 RIGHT TO NANCY YOU WOULD SAY, "I HAVE AN IDEA FOR A BIT. 147 00:11:39,220 --> 00:11:41,122 BUT TO ME YOU WOULD SAY, "IS THIS ANYTHING? BECAUSE I KNOW ALL WERE 148 00:11:41,122 --> 00:11:46,327 INTERESTED IN IS BITS ANYWAY Jimmy: YEAH THAT'S EXACTLY RIGHT 149 00:11:46,327 --> 00:11:50,531 I WOULDN'T WONDER WHAT "THIS" IS. Jimmy: YEAH, "IS THIS 150 00:11:50,531 --> 00:11:52,666 ANYTHING?" MEANS IS THIS A A JOKE OR IS SOMEWHERE WHERE I CAN TRY 151 00:11:52,666 --> 00:11:55,503 SOMETHING? YEAH, CAN I GET A LAUGH WITH THIS SOMEHOW 152 00:11:55,503 --> 00:11:59,874 Jimmy: I WANTED TO ASK, WHEN I AM LOOKING AT ALL THESE -- GOSH, YOU GO THROUGH ALL THE 153 00:11:59,874 --> 00:12:03,711 DECADES. IT'S AWESOME YES, DECADE BY DECADE 154 00:12:03,711 --> 00:12:08,082 WELL, I TURNED 65, AND I THOUGHT, "WELL THAT'S THE END OF REGULATION. 155 00:12:08,082 --> 00:12:13,087 I REACHED THE END OF REGULATION, AND I SHOULD TURN SOMETHING IN 156 00:12:13,087 --> 00:12:20,961 YOU KNOW, WHO KNOWS? LET'S HAVE IT OUT THERE. OKAY, THIS IS WHAT I DID 157 00:12:20,961 --> 00:12:22,930 I WANTED MAKE SOMETHING THAT I COULD LEAVE AND GO, "THIS IS WHAT I SPENT MY LIFE DOING IF 158 00:12:22,930 --> 00:12:27,868 YOU'RE INTERESTED. Jimmy: YEAH IS THIS IS FOR THE COMEDIANS 159 00:12:27,868 --> 00:12:34,508 IS IT JUST FOR FANS OF COMEDY? ANYBODY THAT LIKES COMEDY, I THINK, WOULD LIKE IT 160 00:12:34,508 --> 00:12:37,712 BUT, I THOUGHT A LOT ABOUT COMEDIANS BEING ABLE TO LOOK AT IT, AND KIND OF FIGURE OUT, 161 00:12:37,712 --> 00:12:43,818 "OH, THAT'S HOW HE SET THAT JOKE UP. SO, I DID IT IN DOUBLE SPACED 162 00:12:43,818 --> 00:12:47,321 SO YOU CAN KIND OF ANALYZE IT IF YOU WANT. WELL, HOW DID HE GET FROM THAT 163 00:12:47,321 --> 00:12:51,025 LINE TO THAT LINE. Jimmy: I WAS GOING TO TALK ABOUT THIS 164 00:12:51,025 --> 00:12:53,527 I SWEAR, I LOVE THAT YOU DID THIS REALLY? 165 00:12:53,527 --> 00:12:55,196 Jimmy: I HAVE NEVER SEEN IT DONE BEFORE. EVEN IN THE FIRST CHAPTER, IS 166 00:12:55,196 --> 00:13:02,603 YOU TALKING ABOUT THE BOOK AND YOU -- I'VE NEVER SEEN -- LOOK AT THE SPACING ON THIS. 167 00:13:02,603 --> 00:13:08,409 I HAVE NEVER SEEN -- YEAH, I DOUBLE SPACED IT. Jimmy: AND I LOVE THIS 168 00:13:08,409 --> 00:13:09,844 BECAUSE I CAN DO MY OWN TIMING OF READING THIS EVERY SINGLE LINE 169 00:13:09,844 --> 00:13:14,215 I'VE NEVER SEEN IT LIKE THAT AND IT SET UP THE WHOLE BOOK IT WAS BRILLIANT 170 00:13:14,215 --> 00:13:17,585 WELL, I'M GLAD YOU LIKED IT Jimmy: I SWEAR, I WISH I SAID IT BEFORE YOU SAID IT 171 00:13:17,585 --> 00:13:27,428 BECAUSE REALLY I LOVED IT. I GO, "OH MY GOSH," AND I THOUGHT -- BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. 172 00:13:27,428 --> 00:13:29,497 AND I'M READING IT IN THE RHYTHM AND I GO, "THIS IS SO EASY AND 173 00:13:29,497 --> 00:13:31,465 FUN TO READ BEFORE YOU GET INTO THE MATERIAL." YEAH. 174 00:13:31,465 --> 00:13:34,435 Jimmy: AND THEN I GO, "OH." WELL, STAND-UP IS LIKE SONG LYRICS OR POETRY 175 00:13:34,435 --> 00:13:39,240 IT IS VERY KIND OF ORGANIZED IT IS A VERY ORGANIZED PROGRESSION. 176 00:13:39,240 --> 00:13:44,145 Jimmy: YEAH, HERE IS THE BRIDGE LIKE A GOOD MUSIC IS. 177 00:13:44,145 --> 00:13:48,115 Jimmy: HERE'S THE CHORUS, HERE'S THE BRIDGE. YES 178 00:13:48,115 --> 00:13:49,884 Jimmy: DO YOU LOOK AT ANY OF THESE BITS, AND GO LIKE, "I COULD MAKE THAT BETTER RIGHT 179 00:13:49,884 --> 00:13:57,491 NOW. YES, I DO BUT I -- YOU KNOW, ANYBODY CAN 180 00:13:57,491 --> 00:14:05,800 LOOK AT THEIR EARLY WORK AND GO, "OH MY GOSH, THIS IS NOT AS GOOD AS I GOT LATER ON." 181 00:14:05,800 --> 00:14:07,535 AND I STARTED DOING THAT WHEN I WAS LOOKING AT THE EARLIER STUFF, AND THEN I THOUGHT, 182 00:14:07,535 --> 00:14:16,610 "THAT'S NOT REALLY FAIR TO YOUR YOUNG SELF." WHO WAS -- THAT STUFF, WHATEVER 183 00:14:16,610 --> 00:14:19,580 IT IS, IT GOT YOU TO THE NEXT STEP Jimmy: YEAH 184 00:14:19,580 --> 00:14:24,285 WHICH GOT YOU TO THE NEXT STEP AND THE NEXT STEP SO I THOUGHT I AM GOING TO BE 185 00:14:24,285 --> 00:14:28,956 NICER TO THIS EARLY STUFF. INSTEAD OF GOING, "OH MY GOD THIS IS SO INFANTILE 186 00:14:28,956 --> 00:14:33,094 THIS IS SO BASIC THIS SO HACKY. WHATEVER IT IS 187 00:14:33,094 --> 00:14:40,768 BUT IT GOT YOU THERE IT GOT YOU FROM BEING A JUST -- I WAS JUST A KID IN MY ROOM. 188 00:14:40,768 --> 00:14:44,305 TO ON STAGE, AT "CATCH A RISING STAR" ON FIRST AVENUE AND 78th STREET 189 00:14:44,305 --> 00:14:46,340 Jimmy: YEAH, I LOVE THAT, YOU SET THE STAGE SO WELL. YOU'RE SITTING, AS A KID, 190 00:14:46,340 --> 00:14:50,811 WATCHING THE TV EATING CEREAL IN A HORIZONTALLY STRIPED SHIRT, I THINNK IS WHAT IT 191 00:14:50,811 --> 00:14:54,448 SAID AND YOU ARE WATCHING, YOU'RE GOING, "HOW CAN THESE PEOPLE 192 00:14:54,448 --> 00:14:58,119 TALK LIKE THIS?" YOU'RE WATCHING "THE ED SULLIVAN SHOW. 193 00:14:58,119 --> 00:15:03,491 AND YOU GO, "I WANT TO SEE IF I CAN DO THAT. AND YOU WERE EATING CEREAL, BUT 194 00:15:03,491 --> 00:15:08,329 THEN YOU SAID LATER IN THAT THING, YOU GO, "I JUST WANT TO DO IT FOR LAUGHS 195 00:15:08,329 --> 00:15:10,464 THAT'S REALLY WHAT I WANT TO DO THIS FOR BUT ALSO, IF I CAN MAKE ENOUGH 196 00:15:10,464 --> 00:15:17,271 MONEY TO BUY WONDER BREAD AND SKIPPY PEANUT BUTTER, I'M SET. YEAH. 197 00:15:17,271 --> 00:15:19,073 I THOUGHT, "HOW FUNNY DO YOU HAVE TO BE TO MAKE ENOUGH TO JUST GET A LOAF OF WONDER BREAD 198 00:15:19,073 --> 00:15:28,582 AND A JAR OF SKIPPY A WEEK CAUSE I COULD SURVIVE ON THAT. Jimmy: WHEN WAS THE LAST 199 00:15:28,582 --> 00:15:31,519 TIME YOU HAD PEANUT BUTTER ON BREAD? TODAY 200 00:15:31,519 --> 00:15:36,991 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] Jimmy: WAS IT GOOD? YES, IT'S GOOD. 201 00:15:36,991 --> 00:15:38,926 Jimmy: IT'S THE BEST I DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY MADE WONDER BREAD OUT OF, BUT WOW IT 202 00:15:38,926 --> 00:15:43,431 IS FANTASTIC THAT'S WHAT MAKES IT A WONDER. IT'S NOT BREAD. 203 00:15:43,431 --> 00:15:47,802 IT IS BETTER THAN BREAD. Jimmy: IT IS MORE WONDER. IT'S MORE WONDER THAN BREAD. 204 00:15:47,802 --> 00:15:51,105 YEAH, YOU WONDER. Jimmy: YOU WONDER, "WHAT THE HECK AM I EATING?" 205 00:15:51,105 --> 00:15:55,776 YOU WONDER, "WHAT IS THIS?" HERE YOU GO. THAT'S SOMETHING. Jimmy: THAT'S SOMETHING, I 206 00:15:55,776 --> 00:15:58,846 AM TELLING YOU HERE IS YOU IN THE COMIC STRIP, WHICH I LOVE 207 00:15:58,846 --> 00:16:04,318 YEAH. Jimmy: DO YOU REMEMBER YOUR FIRST NIGHT, AND WERE YOU 208 00:16:04,318 --> 00:16:06,921 NERVOUS? IS IT THAT BUTTERFLIES, WERE YOU COCKY? 209 00:16:06,921 --> 00:16:13,928 WHAT WAS IT LIKE I WAS CATATONICLY NERVOUS I DIDN'T THINK I WAS FUNNY 210 00:16:13,928 --> 00:16:18,299 I DIDN'T KNOW IF I WAS FUNNY MY FRIENDS THOUGHT I WAS FUNNY, BUT I WAS NOT CONVINCED OF IT. 211 00:16:18,299 --> 00:16:22,703 Jimmy: YEAH SO, MY FRIEND TOLD ME THAT HUMPHREY BOGART WOULD ALWAYS 212 00:16:22,703 --> 00:16:30,077 HAVE A SHOT OF SCOTCH BEFORE HE WOULD DO SOMETHING DIFFICULT SO, WE WENT TO THE BAR NEXT 213 00:16:30,077 --> 00:16:33,814 DOOR TO "CATCH A RISING STAR" AND WE THREW DOWN A SHOT OF SCOTCH 214 00:16:33,814 --> 00:16:39,487 Jimmy: DID THAT HELP? NO. Jimmy: NO, OF COURSE NOT. 215 00:16:39,487 --> 00:16:42,089 IT DID NOTHING YOU ARE JUST STARTING OUT. I THINK THAT'S A THING ABOUT 216 00:16:42,089 --> 00:16:47,795 STAND-UP TOO, THAT EVEN NOW WHEN YOU DO A JOKE, I DON'T KNOW IF I'M FUNNY. 217 00:16:47,795 --> 00:16:51,332 YOU DON'T KNOW. YOU'RE NOT IF THE JOKE IS NOT FUNNY YOU 218 00:16:51,332 --> 00:16:58,105 ARE NOT, IN THAT MOMENT. IN THAT MOMENT, YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING OF WHAT YOU 219 00:16:58,105 --> 00:17:02,243 WANT TO BE YOU GET A LAUGH, YOU ARE EVERYTHING THAT YOU WANT TO BE 220 00:17:02,243 --> 00:17:06,947 Jimmy: IT IS THE BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD YEAH, AND THE WORST 221 00:17:06,947 --> 00:17:11,419 Jimmy: AND THE WORST IF YOU DON'T. AND THAT'S WHAT PEOPLE, I 222 00:17:11,419 --> 00:17:17,058 THINK, ARE ATTRACTED TO IT FOR THEY WANT TO SEE A PERSON -- THAT'S WHY I WATCH BASEBALL. 223 00:17:17,058 --> 00:17:19,093 IS THIS GUY GOING TO GET A HIT, OR HE'S GOING TO HAVE TO DRUDGE BACK TO THE DUGOUT WITH HIS 224 00:17:19,093 --> 00:17:23,064 BAT? JUST HOLDING IT. GOING, "I REALLY DIDN'T EVEN 225 00:17:23,064 --> 00:17:32,873 USE THIS." ARE YOU SCHVITZING Jimmy: IT IS CALLED DOOEY 226 00:17:32,873 --> 00:17:37,078 NOW. YOU KNOW WHENEVER I COME ON YOUR SHOW, EVERYONE, THE 227 00:17:37,078 --> 00:17:41,482 AUDIENCE EXPECTS YOU'RE GOING TO DO ME EVERYONE THINKS THAT YOU WILL 228 00:17:41,482 --> 00:17:43,217 DO ME. 'CAUSE YOU HAVE THIS GREAT IMPRESSION OF ME, AND EVERYBODY 229 00:17:43,217 --> 00:17:51,992 THINKS IT IS THE BEST ONE. AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I HAVE ENJOYED IT OVER THE YEARS 230 00:17:51,992 --> 00:17:56,797 TOO. YOU KNOW, I HAVE A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR ABOUT MYSELF. 231 00:17:56,797 --> 00:18:06,407 I AM NOT AN EGOTISTICAL-TYPE PERSON I LIKE BEING MADE FUN OF 232 00:18:06,407 --> 00:18:14,181 BUT, I THINK IT IS TIME FOR YOUR IMPRESSION TO EVOLVE TO THE NEXT DURATION OF WHO I AM. 233 00:18:14,181 --> 00:18:19,754 YOU KNOW I'M NOT THE -- YOU DO THE COMEDY CLUB '85 JERRY. THAT'S YOUR IMPRESSION 234 00:18:19,754 --> 00:18:22,790 VERY GOOD. VERY ENTERTAINING. EVERYONE LOVES IT. 235 00:18:22,790 --> 00:18:26,527 Jimmy: IT'S HIGH-ENERGY, YEAH YEAH, I DO. IT'S "I DO THIS. 236 00:18:26,527 --> 00:18:34,702 TALKING LIKE THIS. AND THAT'S WHAT I DO SO, I THINK WE'RE ALL READY 237 00:18:34,702 --> 00:18:40,508 TO MOVE FORWARD TO THE NEXT JERRY. YOU ARE SUCH A GREAT 238 00:18:40,508 --> 00:18:44,145 IMPRESSIONIST. Jimmy: UH-HUH YOU ARE SO GREAT OF DOING 239 00:18:44,145 --> 00:18:46,313 IMPRESSIONS. Jimmy: YOU WANT THE NEXT LEVEL -- 240 00:18:46,313 --> 00:18:53,621 I WANT THE NEXT ONE WE ALL WANT TO SEE WHAT ELSE CAN YOU DO WITH THIS 241 00:18:53,621 --> 00:18:56,457 Jimmy: THAT'S THE SEQUEL TO THE BOOK, "WHAT ELSE CAN YOU DO WITH THIS? 242 00:18:56,457 --> 00:19:01,062 [ LAUGHTER ] WHAT ELSE CAN YOU DO WITH THIS ALL RIGHT. 243 00:19:01,062 --> 00:19:03,230 WELL, I AM GOING TO TRY THIS OKAY WHEN WE COME BACK, WE ARE GOING 244 00:19:03,230 --> 00:19:07,835 TO DO SOMETHING CALLED "THE SEINFIELD CHALLENGE. AND I AM ALSO GOING TO SHOW OFF 245 00:19:07,835 --> 00:19:11,672 MY NEW IMPRESSION OF YOU YOU HAVE A NEW IMPRESSION Jimmy: WE ARE GOING TO SEE 246 00:19:11,672 --> 00:19:15,042 AFTER THE BREAK. WE ARE ALL VERY EXCITED TO SEE THAT 247 00:19:15,042 --> 00:19:17,678 Jimmy: MORE WITH JERRY SEINFIELD. THANKSGIVING SHOW HERE 248 00:19:17,678 --> 00:19:34,095 EVERYBODY. COME ON BACK * 249 00:19:34,095 --> 00:19:36,831 Jimmy: WELCOME BACK WE ARE HERE WITH JERRY SEINFELD 250 00:19:36,831 --> 00:19:41,635 HIS NEW BOOK "IS THIS ANYTHING?" IS AVAILABLE NOW. DID I DO YOU ALREADY 251 00:19:41,635 --> 00:19:45,573 NO, YOU JUST -- YOU'RE THE ONLY PERSON THAT SAYS IT THE RIGHT WAY. 252 00:19:45,573 --> 00:19:49,176 THAT'S THE WAY COMEDIANS SAY IT Jimmy: WE'RE ABOUT TO DO 253 00:19:49,176 --> 00:19:53,247 SOMETHING FUN. THIS IS "THE SEINFELD CHALLENGE. 254 00:19:53,247 --> 00:19:53,280 THIS IS "THE SEINFELD CHALLENGE. 255 00:19:53,814 --> 00:19:55,416 * SEINFELD, SEINFEL SEINFELD, SEINFELD 256 00:19:55,416 --> 00:19:58,352 CHALLENGE * Jimmy: WE ASKED OUR VIEWERS TO PICK UP YOUR BOOK AND RECORD 257 00:19:58,352 --> 00:20:03,591 THEMSELVES DOING THEIR FAVORITE SEINFELD ROUTINE YOUR BOOK HAS STAND UP, EVERY 258 00:20:03,591 --> 00:20:07,962 BIT THAT YOU'VE EVER DONE FROM THE '70s UNTIL TODAY THERE'S A LOT TO CHOOSE FROM 259 00:20:07,962 --> 00:20:12,133 TONIGHT WE'RE GONNA WATCH SOME OF THESE SUBMISSIONS AND SEE HOW THEY DID 260 00:20:12,133 --> 00:20:14,301 FIRST UP, WE HAVE ASHLEY GUTERMOOTH FROM WRIGHTSTOWN, NEW JERSEY. 261 00:20:14,301 --> 00:20:19,407 SHE'S DOING YOUR BIT ABOUT TALK SHOW HOSTS LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THIS. 262 00:20:19,407 --> 00:20:19,440 SHOW HOSTS LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THIS. 263 00:20:21,008 --> 00:20:24,478 HOW COME TALK SHOW HOSTS NEVER HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH 264 00:20:24,478 --> 00:20:28,516 TIME THEY HAVE THEY'RE ALWAYS LOOKING OFF CAMERA 265 00:20:28,516 --> 00:20:32,253 DO WE HAVE TIME FOR THIS HOW WE DOING ON TIME ARE WE OUT OF TIME 266 00:20:32,253 --> 00:20:36,657 WE'RE OUT OF TIME. IT'S YOUR OWN SHOW WHY DO YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT 267 00:20:36,657 --> 00:20:40,761 HOW IT WORKS YOU NEVER SEE "MAGNUM P.I." GOING, "ARE WE GONNA -- WE 268 00:20:40,761 --> 00:20:51,038 GONNA STRANGLE THIS GUY OR ARE WE GOING TO TAKE A BREAK?" I WILL TELL YOU WHAT, I'LL BONK 269 00:20:51,038 --> 00:20:55,643 HIM ON THE HEAD, WE'LL TAKE A QUICK BREAK, COME BACK, I'LL DRIVE IN THE CAR REAL FAST 270 00:20:55,643 --> 00:20:59,080 OKAY STAY WITH US [ APPLAUSE ] 271 00:20:59,080 --> 00:21:01,982 THAT WAS GREAT. Jimmy: THAT WAS GREAT, RIGHT? 272 00:21:01,982 --> 00:21:03,718 THAT WAS REALLY GOOD. Jimmy: THAT'S FUNNY, EVERYONE DOES SAY ARE WE 273 00:21:03,718 --> 00:21:07,421 RUNNING OUT OF TIME. SHE HAD IT MEMORIZED TOO. SHE GOT EVERY WORD RIGHT 274 00:21:07,421 --> 00:21:11,092 Jimmy: AND CRUSHED IT, YEAH DO YOU KNOW THAT BIT? Jimmy: DID THE BIT. 275 00:21:11,092 --> 00:21:13,994 YES, I LOVE THAT BIT WAS THAT -- DID YOU DO THAT ON "LETTERMAN?" 276 00:21:13,994 --> 00:21:17,098 MANY YEARS AGO, YEAH, IN THE '80s "MAGNUM P.I." GIVES IT AWAY. 277 00:21:17,098 --> 00:21:25,706 Jimmy: YUP. NEXT UP, WE HAVE HANS HAFFER FROM ISSAQUAH, WASHINGTON. 278 00:21:25,706 --> 00:21:29,844 THIS IS A CLASSIC BIT. THIS IS THE McDONALD'S BIT OH, UH-HUH. 279 00:21:29,844 --> 00:21:30,911 OH, UH-HUH. Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, LET'S SEE 280 00:21:32,847 --> 00:21:33,547 THAT UP TO NOW, LIKE 89 BILLION 281 00:21:33,547 --> 00:21:41,222 HAMBURGERS 89 BILLION, WHAT AN OUTRAGEOUS NUMBER 282 00:21:41,222 --> 00:21:42,957 I MEAN, I WOULD REALLY LIKE TO SIT DOWN WITH THE CEO AT McDONALD'S AND SAY, "LOOK, WE 283 00:21:42,957 --> 00:21:46,560 GET IT, YOU SOLD A LOT OF HAMBURGERS 89 BILLION, QUATRILLION, 284 00:21:46,560 --> 00:21:57,605 COTILLION HAMBURGERS, WHATEVER THAT IS. WHY NOT JUST PUT UP A SIGN THAT 285 00:21:57,605 --> 00:22:04,278 SAYS "McDONALD'S, WE'RE DOING VERY WELL. Jimmy: I THINK HE LANDED. 286 00:22:04,278 --> 00:22:09,750 I THINK HE LANDED. THE FUN PART OF THAT BIT IS I WANT TO -- I WOULD LOVE TO 287 00:22:09,750 --> 00:22:14,455 MEET THE CHAIRMAN OF THE McDONALD'S SO I CAN GO "LOOK, WE ALL GET IT. 288 00:22:14,455 --> 00:22:19,894 [ LAUGHTER ] Jimmy: YUP, YOU'RE RIGHT. THAT'S THE FUN PART 289 00:22:19,894 --> 00:22:23,197 Jimmy: THAT'S THE FUN PART. YEAH THAT'S THE ATTITUDE 290 00:22:23,197 --> 00:22:26,567 Jimmy: HE ADDED PROPS AND HE HAD KIDS TOYS. YEAH, YEAH. 291 00:22:26,567 --> 00:22:27,802 SO I'LL GIVE HIM POINTS FOR THAT ONE BUT THIS ONE HERE IS 292 00:22:27,802 --> 00:22:32,239 MAGDA MAHILA FROM FRANCE TRYING YOUR ROUTINE "MAD COW. 293 00:22:33,774 --> 00:22:39,246 WHAT I LOVE ABOUT MAD COW DISEASE IS THAT OF COURSE WE TRY TO BLAME IT ON THE COWS. 294 00:22:39,246 --> 00:22:45,286 IT'S NOT OUR FAULT THESE COWS ARE CRAZY THEY'RE NUTS 295 00:22:45,286 --> 00:22:49,523 THEY'RE OUT OF THEIR MINDS WE SHOW THEM SLIDING DOWN THIS SLIPPERY RAMPS ALL OUT OF 296 00:22:49,523 --> 00:22:51,258 CONTROL AND THE COWS ARE PROBABLY LIKE, "OH SURE, YOU ARE DRINKING ME, EATING ME, 297 00:22:51,258 --> 00:23:00,568 WEARING ME, SNEAKING UP ON ME AND TIPPING ME OVER AND I AM THE ONE WHO'S OFF? 298 00:23:00,568 --> 00:23:08,876 [ LAUGHTER ] Jimmy: IN FRONT OF COWS IN FRONT OF COWS. 299 00:23:08,876 --> 00:23:13,814 THAT'S THE NEXT LEVEL OF COMEDY IS YOU ACTUALLY GO TO THE PREMISE. 300 00:23:13,814 --> 00:23:17,752 Jimmy: TO THE JOKE. NO, TO THE JOKE, YEAH YOU'RE THERE 301 00:23:17,752 --> 00:23:22,323 Jimmy: OH, MY GOSH. I HAVE ONE MORE. HERE TO DO -- HERE TO DO YOUR 302 00:23:22,323 --> 00:23:26,794 BIT ABOUT THE POST OFFICE. OH. Jimmy: WATCH ME 303 00:23:26,794 --> 00:23:30,331 WATCH THIS OH. Jimmy: YEAH 304 00:23:30,331 --> 00:23:34,235 OKAY. Jimmy: "THE POST OFFICE ALWAYS HAS THIS EMOTIONAL, 305 00:23:34,235 --> 00:23:36,003 FINANCIAL MELT DOWN EVERY THREE TO FIVE YEARS THAT THEIR BUSINESS MODEL FROM 1630 ISN'T 306 00:23:36,003 --> 00:23:48,349 WORKING ANYMORE. I CANNOT UNDERSTAND HOW A 21st CENTURY INFORMATION SYSTEM 307 00:23:48,349 --> 00:23:56,223 BASED ON LICKING, WALKING AND A RANDOM NUMBER OF PENNIES IS STRUGGLING TO COMPETE. 308 00:23:56,223 --> 00:24:02,430 WHAT IS THE REASON MAKES NO SENSE THEN THEY ALWAYS -- THEN THEY 309 00:24:02,430 --> 00:24:06,701 ALWAYS PUSH THE POSTMASTER GENERAL OUT ON TV TO EXPLAIN THEIR DIFFERENCES, ALWAYS HAVE 310 00:24:06,701 --> 00:24:10,638 TO MAKE A BIG SPEECH HE'S ALL FREAKED OUT HAS RINGS UNDER EYES, NO SHAVE, 311 00:24:10,638 --> 00:24:16,110 PULLING AN ALL-NIGHTERS. 'WE CAN'T DO IT ANYMORE. WE GOT TO GO UP A PENNY ON THE 312 00:24:16,110 --> 00:24:21,782 STEPS. THERE IS NO WAY AROUND IT. WE'RE TRYING TO GET SOME 313 00:24:21,782 --> 00:24:29,890 BREATHING ROOM, THE COST, THE INFRASTRUCTURE.' WE ALL LIKE 'DUDE, DUDE, RELAX 314 00:24:29,890 --> 00:24:34,695 RAISE IT A PENNY WE DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW MUCH A STAMP IS ANYWAY. 315 00:24:34,695 --> 00:24:40,101 .44, .53 OR .62? MAKE IT A BUCK, YOU ARE GOING TO GET THERE 316 00:24:40,101 --> 00:24:46,273 AND IF I ENDS UP YOU HAVE SOME MONEY LEFT OVER, BUY YOURSELF SOME PANTS AND A REAL CAR.'" 317 00:24:46,273 --> 00:24:51,846 * YES Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. 318 00:24:51,846 --> 00:24:55,583 DO YOU REMEMBER THAT BIT THAT WAS EXCELLENT. Jimmy: DO YOU REMEMBER THAT 319 00:24:55,583 --> 00:24:59,520 YOU BROUGHT A MATURITY OF THE YEARS, THE GREATER -- THE CONDESCENSION THAT ONLY COMES 320 00:24:59,520 --> 00:25:07,495 WITH AGE Jimmy: THE NEW JERRY -- THE NEW JERRY IMPRESSION, YOU GO, 321 00:25:07,495 --> 00:25:14,268 "WHAT IS IT - - YOU TALK LIKE THAT ALMOST. THE GUYS GOING INTO THEIR THING 322 00:25:14,268 --> 00:25:19,673 WE'RE THE POST -- THE THING I DON'T GET ABOUT THAT." THEN YOU SPRINKLE IN -- OH, IF 323 00:25:19,673 --> 00:25:24,111 YOU WANT -- IF YOU WANT TO THAT'S WHEN YOU'RE ALREADY RIDING THE WAVE. 324 00:25:24,111 --> 00:25:27,314 THAT'S SHOWING OFF THAT'S WHEN YOU HANG TEN, AND YOU DO SOMETHING, YOU SHOW OFF 325 00:25:27,314 --> 00:25:31,118 A LITTLE BIT AND "SEEN" IS A GOOD WORD TO DO YOU, BY THE WAY. 326 00:25:31,118 --> 00:25:36,123 ONE WORD IMPRESSION. "SEEN. SEEN? 327 00:25:36,123 --> 00:25:42,096 Jimmy: LIKE HAVE YOU "SEEN" YOURSELF [ LAUGHTER ] 328 00:25:42,096 --> 00:25:50,004 HAVE YOU SEEN -- SEEN IS THE ONE WORD IMPRESSION FOR THE NEW JERRY. 329 00:25:50,004 --> 00:25:52,306 HAVE YOU SEEN YOURSELF IS A A HILARIOUS LINE THAT I DO NOT HAVE ANYWHERE. 330 00:25:52,306 --> 00:25:56,343 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] IT'S A PERFECT LINE FOR ME HAVE YOU SEEN YOURSELF 331 00:25:56,343 --> 00:26:01,716 [ LAUGHTER ] Jimmy: THAT'S IT. I'M THINKING -- I SHOULD WRITE 332 00:26:01,716 --> 00:26:03,818 FOR YOU. YEAH. Jimmy: RIGHT "I UNDERSTAND, 333 00:26:03,818 --> 00:26:10,124 BUY HAVE YOU SEEN YOURSELF?" HAVE YOU SEEN YOURSELF IS THE NEXT BIT, I WANT TO SEE IT, 334 00:26:10,124 --> 00:26:14,295 PLEASE JERRY, UNFORTUNATE, IT IS A TIGHT RACE BUT THERE COULD 335 00:26:14,295 --> 00:26:21,068 ONLY BE ONE WINNER ASHLEY GUTTERMOOTH IS MY WINNER 336 00:26:21,068 --> 00:26:23,137 Jimmy: I AGREE, THERE YOU GO * 337 00:26:23,137 --> 00:26:26,407 SHE MEMORIZED THE BIT Jimmy: ASHLEY I TOTALLY AGREE, YUP 338 00:26:26,407 --> 00:26:31,212 SHE PERFORMED IT VERY WELL. IT'S NOT EVEN THAT FUNNY BUT SHE MADE IT FUNNY. 339 00:26:31,212 --> 00:26:33,080 Jimmy: WE ARE GOING TO SEND HER AN AUTOGRAPHED COPY OF YOUR BOOK - 340 00:26:33,080 --> 00:26:35,483 OH, FANTASTIC Jimmy: -- AND A SHOW LITTLE "TONIGHT SHOW SWAG." 341 00:26:35,483 --> 00:26:37,151 Jimmy: MY THANKS FOR EVERYONE PARTICIPATED IN "THE SEINFELD CHALLENGE" AND OF 342 00:26:37,151 --> 00:26:42,690 COURSE JERRY SEINFELD," THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE IT IS ALWAYS THE BEST TIME 343 00:26:42,690 --> 00:26:46,627 I LOVE YOU BUDDY AND BE SAFE, SO GOOD TO SEE YOU, LOVE 344 00:26:46,627 --> 00:26:49,096 YOU, TOO HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYBODY Jimmy: BYE, BUDDY 345 00:26:49,096 --> 00:26:52,133 THANK YOU SO MUCH. STAY SAFE Jimmy: WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK 346 00:26:52,133 --> 00:26:54,402 WITH MORE "TONIGHT SHOW," EVERYONE COME ON BACK 347 00:26:54,402 --> 00:27:11,652 * Jimmy: OUR NEXT GUEST IS A GLOBAL SUPERSTAR WHO HAS A 348 00:27:11,652 --> 00:27:17,558 A BRAND NEW ALBUM COMING OUT IT MIGHT EVEN BE OUT RIGHT NOW HE'S A TWO-TIME LATIN GRAMMY 349 00:27:17,558 --> 00:27:21,062 AWARD WINNER, MULTI-PLATINUM SELLING ARTIST, AND WE LOVE IT WHEN HE COMES ON THE SHOW. 350 00:27:21,062 --> 00:27:25,733 HERE IS THE ONE AND ONLY BAD BUNNY. YEAH 351 00:27:25,733 --> 00:27:27,935 WOOO. Jimmy: OH, COME ON NOW. I LOVE IT. 352 00:27:27,935 --> 00:27:30,871 YOU LOOK GOOD, BUDDY THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE HAPPY THANKSGIVING 353 00:27:30,871 --> 00:27:34,542 THERE'S A LOT -- THANK YOU Jimmy: THERE'S A LOT I WANT 354 00:27:34,542 --> 00:27:40,181 TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT BUT FIRST, I WANT TO ASK HOW ARE YOU FEELING? 355 00:27:40,181 --> 00:27:44,885 THE LAST I SAW SOMETHING YOU TESTED POSITIVE FOR COVID. I'M OKAY, I'M OKAY. 356 00:27:44,885 --> 00:27:54,495 I FEEL GOOD RIGHT NOW. JUST A LITTLE COUGHING AND YOU KNOW BUT THANK GOD I FEEL GOOD 357 00:27:54,495 --> 00:27:56,263 Jimmy: I'M GLAD YOU'RE FEELING BETTER AND YOU'RE BACK TO - 358 00:27:56,263 --> 00:27:59,400 YEAH. Jimmy: GOOD, WE NEED YOU, BUDDY, STAY SAFE 359 00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:03,037 PLEASE, STAY SAFE. YEAH. Jimmy: I WANTED TO THANK YOU 360 00:28:03,037 --> 00:28:06,407 BECAUSE YOU DID SOMETHING BACK IN SEPTEMBER FOR THE HOSPITAL WORKERS. 361 00:28:06,407 --> 00:28:08,142 YOU DID A CONCERT TO THANK PEOPLE WORKING IN THE HOSPITAL AND YOU DID THE WHOLE THING AT 362 00:28:08,142 --> 00:28:10,878 THE TOP OF THE TRUCK WHILE IT DROVE THROUGH NEW YORK CITY. YEAH, LOOK AT ME. 363 00:28:10,878 --> 00:28:20,388 Jimmy: TELL ME ABOUT THAT I MEAN, WERE YOU EVER WORRIED THAT YOU HAVE TO DUCK REALLY 364 00:28:20,388 --> 00:28:24,759 QUICK OR HIT YOUR HEAD ON A BRANCH OR SOMETHING? [ LAUGHTER ] 365 00:28:24,759 --> 00:28:28,496 I WOULD BE WORRIED I'D BE WORRIED IF I'M STANDING LIKE - 366 00:28:28,496 --> 00:28:32,433 YEAH, YEAH, THAT WAS LIKE EXTREME SPORTS, YOU KNOW LIKE A - 367 00:28:32,433 --> 00:28:35,603 Jimmy: YEAH, YEAH, YEAH YEAH. BUT -- BUT, IT WAS FUN 368 00:28:35,603 --> 00:28:41,642 I ENJOYED IT IT WAS GREAT, DAY AND NIGHT. Jimmy: IT WAS JUST GREAT TO 369 00:28:41,642 --> 00:28:44,845 WATCH AND MADE A LOT OF PEOPLE HAPPY. WE KNOW BAD BUNNY THE SINGER, 370 00:28:44,845 --> 00:28:46,447 WE KNOW BAD BUNNY THE SONGWRITER, BUT WE'RE ABOUT TO GET TO MEET BAD BUNNY, THE 371 00:28:46,447 --> 00:28:50,584 ACTOR. I'M SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS. YOU'RE GONNA BE IN THE NEW 372 00:28:50,584 --> 00:28:55,256 SEASON OF "NARCOS: MEXICO. YEAH. YES. 373 00:28:55,256 --> 00:29:00,294 Jimmy: WHAT IS THE HARDEST PART OF ACTING IS IT MEMORIZING THE LINES 374 00:29:00,294 --> 00:29:05,866 NO, I'M REALLY GOOD MEMORIZING THE LINES I HAVE A GOOD MEMORY 375 00:29:05,866 --> 00:29:15,609 I THINK THE HARD PART IS DOING THE SAME, AND THE SAME, AND THE SAME SCENE ONE ANOTHER 376 00:29:15,609 --> 00:29:20,848 [ LAUGHTER ] WOW. Jimmy: YEAH 377 00:29:20,848 --> 00:29:26,654 THAT PART I THINK IS THE HARD PART, YOU KNOW? BUT I LIKE IT. 378 00:29:26,654 --> 00:29:29,824 I ENJOYED THE NEW EXPERIENCE I'M SO HAPPY Jimmy: I THINK IT IS SO FUN 379 00:29:29,824 --> 00:29:31,892 I THINK YOU'RE PERFECT FOR IT. YOU'RE ALSO DOING FILMS NOW, TOO. 380 00:29:31,892 --> 00:29:35,062 YEAH. Jimmy: WHAT MOVIE ARE YOU GOING TO BE IN 381 00:29:35,062 --> 00:29:40,401 "AMERICAN SOUL. Jimmy: "AMERICAN SOUL." "AMERICAN SOUL. 382 00:29:40,401 --> 00:29:43,137 YEAH Jimmy: "YEAH, 'AMERICAN SOUL.' 383 00:29:43,137 --> 00:29:48,476 ONE MAN HAS TO SAVE -- WITH BAD BUNNY. Jimmy: -- WITH BAD BUNNY 384 00:29:48,476 --> 00:29:51,579 SAVING THE WORLD." THAT'S GOING TO BE AWESOME YOU KNOW, I FOLLOW YOU ON 385 00:29:51,579 --> 00:29:55,716 INSTAGRAM, YOU KNOW I'M A BIG FAN. I WATCH EVERYTHING 386 00:29:55,716 --> 00:29:58,452 I LIKE EVERYTHING YOU DO BUT YOU WERE POSTING THESE VIDEOS IN QUARANTINE WHERE YOU 387 00:29:58,452 --> 00:30:02,289 ACT OUT DIFFERENT SCENES FROM "TOY STORY" WITH THE ACTION FIGURES. 388 00:30:02,289 --> 00:30:07,128 DUDE, I LOVED THEM EVERYBODY LOVED THEM THAT'S MY FAVORITE PART OF 389 00:30:07,128 --> 00:30:11,465 THE QUARANTINE Jimmy: WE ALL JUST -- IT CAME OUT OF NOWHERE. 390 00:30:11,465 --> 00:30:13,200 I JUST LOVE THAT YOU DID IT. I WANT TO SHOW ONE OF THESE VIDEOS 391 00:30:13,200 --> 00:30:14,702 VIDEOS WATCH THIS RIGHT NOW 392 00:30:16,203 --> 00:30:16,804 [ SPEAKING IN A FOREIGN 393 00:30:16,804 --> 00:30:32,253 LANGUAGE ] [ LAUGHTER ] Jimmy: CROCODILE, IT'S SO 394 00:30:32,253 --> 00:30:36,290 FUNNY. I THINK -- WOULD YOU EVER WANT TO BE A VOICE IN A CARTOON -- 395 00:30:36,290 --> 00:30:40,428 IN AN ANIMATED MOVIE THAT'S MY DREAM I WANT IT. 396 00:30:40,428 --> 00:30:44,265 THAT'S ONE OF MY DREAMS. Jimmy: WE HAVE SO MANY FRIENDS WATCHING THIS SHOW 397 00:30:44,265 --> 00:30:45,566 RIGHT NOW THAT ARE MAKING THESE MOVIES IF YOU NEED A VOICE -- 398 00:30:45,566 --> 00:30:49,904 YEAH, I'M READY I'M READY. Jimmy: GO NO FURTHER, 399 00:30:49,904 --> 00:30:55,042 BAD BUNNY WANTS TO BE IN AN ANIMATED MOVIE THIS IS GONNA -- NEXT TIME YOU 400 00:30:55,042 --> 00:30:57,712 COME ON, TRUST ME, I'VE DONE -- THIS HAS HAPPENED BEFORE I JUST HAVE A WEIRD THING. 401 00:30:57,712 --> 00:30:59,580 SOMETHING'S GOING TO HAPPEN AND NEXT TIME YOU COME YOU'LL BE LIKE, "DUDE, THEY SAW THE SHOW, 402 00:30:59,580 --> 00:31:05,252 AND I GOT A JOB. IT WILL BE THE BEST STORY, I WOULD LOVE TO SEE THAT HAPPEN. 403 00:31:05,252 --> 00:31:10,725 THANK YOU, THANK YOU. Jimmy: I WANT TO TALK ABOUT YOUR NEW MUSIC 404 00:31:10,725 --> 00:31:12,860 YOU LIKE TO HIDE LITTLE CLUES ABOUT RELEASING NEW THINGS AND ON YOUR FINAL TRACK ON YOU 405 00:31:12,860 --> 00:31:18,699 LAST ALBUM, YOU HINTED OUT YOU HAVE NEW MUSIC IN NINE MONTHS. THAT WAS FEBRUARY. 406 00:31:18,699 --> 00:31:22,536 YEAH. Jimmy: HERE WE ARE NINE MONTHS LATER AND - 407 00:31:22,536 --> 00:31:24,772 NINE MONTHS Jimmy: YESTERDAY YOU ANNOUNCED YOU HAVE A NEW ALBUM 408 00:31:24,772 --> 00:31:29,510 COMING OUT TONIGHT AT MIDNIGHT LIKE, RIGHT NOW. TONIGHT 409 00:31:29,510 --> 00:31:32,380 WOO! Jimmy: RIGHT NOW IT IS OUT. YES 410 00:31:32,380 --> 00:31:36,417 "EL ULTIMO TOUR DEL MUNDO. Jimmy: CAN I SHOW THE COVER THIS IS AN EXCLUSIVE 411 00:31:36,417 --> 00:31:38,586 OF COURSE OF COURSE. OF COURSE. 412 00:31:38,586 --> 00:31:42,323 Jimmy: LOOK AT THIS WOO Jimmy: THAT'S WHAT I'M 413 00:31:42,323 --> 00:31:47,895 TALKING ABOUT THERE. "EL ULTIMO TOUR DEL MUNDO. "EL ULTIMO TOUR DEL MUNDO." 414 00:31:47,895 --> 00:31:51,132 Jimmy: I LOVE -- THE LAST ALBUM WAS -- I'M NOT GONNA REMEMBER IT. 415 00:31:51,132 --> 00:31:53,534 Y-H -- [ LAUGHTER ] [ SPEAKING IN A FOREIGN 416 00:31:53,534 --> 00:32:00,708 LANGUAGE ] Jimmy: YEAH, OKAY, YEAH WHY THE BIG MACK TRUCK 417 00:32:00,708 --> 00:32:02,476 'CAUSE IT'S LIKE THE LAST TOUR OF THE WORLD, SO IT'S ME AROUND THE WORLD THROUGH THAT 418 00:32:02,476 --> 00:32:10,851 TRUCK. Jimmy: YEP. I LOVE TRUCKS 419 00:32:10,851 --> 00:32:21,162 MY DAD, MY -- MY GRANDPA, UNCLES, THEY DRIVE TRUCKS. Jimmy: I DIDN'T KNOW THAT 420 00:32:21,162 --> 00:32:23,864 IT'S SOMETHING FROM MY FAMILY Jimmy: WOW, THAT'S SO COOL. 421 00:32:23,864 --> 00:32:26,701 I LOVE THAT. YEAH. Jimmy: IT'S PERFECT 422 00:32:26,701 --> 00:32:29,537 A LITTLE SHOUT OUT TO THE FAMILY THANK YOU 423 00:32:29,537 --> 00:32:31,605 Jimmy: WELL, IT IS AFTER MIDNIGHT, WHICH I CAN SAY THE NEW ALBUM IS OUT RIGHT NOW 424 00:32:31,605 --> 00:32:35,209 WOO Jimmy: EVERYBODY GO CHECK IT OUT AND #BADBUNNY. 425 00:32:35,209 --> 00:32:37,311 WOULD YOU MIND STICKING AROUND A LITTLE LONGER, PLAY A FUN GAME WITH ME 426 00:32:37,311 --> 00:32:40,781 OF COURSE YEAH Jimmy: MORE WITH BAD BUNNY 427 00:32:40,781 --> 00:32:42,983 AFTER THE BREAK. COME ON BACK, EVERYBODY. LOOK AT THIS 428 00:32:42,983 --> 00:33:04,872 * Jimmy: WELCOME BACK TO "THE TONIGHT SHOW." 429 00:33:04,872 --> 00:33:08,809 I'M HERE WITH BAD BUNNY. NOW, WE'RE GOING TO LIVEN UP SOME OF THE MOST BORING THINGS 430 00:33:08,809 --> 00:33:13,180 IMAGINABLE, BY TURNING THEM INTO UNFORGETTABLE SONGS IN A GAME CALLED "AUTO-TUNE-UP. 431 00:33:13,180 --> 00:33:18,853 * AUT TUNE UP 432 00:33:18,853 --> 00:33:23,190 YEAH * Jimmy: HERE'S HOW IT WORKS. WE'LL EACH BE GIVEN A RANDOM 433 00:33:23,190 --> 00:33:28,262 BORING PARAGRAPH, AND THE WORDS WILL APPEAR ON THE SCREEN. OUR JOB IS TO TURN IT INTO AN 434 00:33:28,262 --> 00:33:31,365 AWESOME SONG, WITH THE HELP OF AUTO-TUNE. YOU READY FOR THIS 435 00:33:31,365 --> 00:33:34,301 I'M READY I'M READY Jimmy: ALRIGHT, BAD BUNNY, HERE WE GO. 436 00:33:34,301 --> 00:33:37,371 I'M UP FIRST LET'S SEE WHAT I AM AUTO-TUNING. 437 00:33:37,371 --> 00:33:48,315 * OKAY, I AM GOING TO AUTO-TUNE AMAZON'S RETURN POLICY 438 00:33:48,315 --> 00:33:50,584 IT'S THE HOLIDAY SEASON. PEOPLE WANT TO RETURN SOME GIFTS THEY GOT, SO I'M GOING TO 439 00:33:50,584 --> 00:34:01,529 AUTO-TUNE, HERE WE GO. GIVE ME A GROOVE * 440 00:34:01,529 --> 00:34:06,333 * IT CAN TAKE UP 25 DAY FOR YOUR ITE TO REACH U 441 00:34:06,333 --> 00:34:12,139 ONCE IT'S RETURNED * * WHEN IT ARRIVES AT OUR FULFILLMENT CENTE 442 00:34:12,139 --> 00:34:19,146 IT TAKES TWO BUSINESS DAYS FOR * * THE REFUND TO BE PROCESSE 443 00:34:19,146 --> 00:34:23,617 AND THREE TO FIVE BUSINESS DAYS FOR THE REFUN AMOUNT TO SHOW * 444 00:34:23,617 --> 00:34:29,090 * UP IN YOUR ACCOUN IN YOUR ACCOUNT * * 445 00:34:29,090 --> 00:34:31,359 Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. THAT'S IT. OKAY, I'M READY 446 00:34:31,359 --> 00:34:33,694 Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. HERE YOU GO. LET'S SEE WHAT YOU'RE GONNA 447 00:34:33,694 --> 00:34:41,969 GET, BUD * Jimmy: HOW TO CHOP 448 00:34:41,969 --> 00:34:45,706 A JALAPENO HOW TO CHOP A JALAPENO! Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, HERE WE 449 00:34:45,706 --> 00:34:48,109 GO LET'S GIVE HIM SOME MUSIC WHENEVER YOU'RE READY. 450 00:34:48,109 --> 00:34:58,152 * * REMEMBER GLOVES FOR PROTECTION 451 00:34:58,152 --> 00:35:05,259 REMOVE THE STEM * * BY SLICING HALF AN INCH BELOW IT * 452 00:35:05,259 --> 00:35:18,172 * SCOOP THE CORE OUT IF YOU WANT TO REDUCE THE SPICE * 453 00:35:18,172 --> 00:35:27,348 * COULD CUT INTO STRIPE OR CUBES * * 454 00:35:27,348 --> 00:35:33,254 Jimmy: THAT WAS FANTASTIC DUDE, CUBES IS THE BEST. THAT'S THE BEST LINE 455 00:35:33,254 --> 00:35:35,890 * CUBES * ALL RIGHT, LET'S SEE WHAT I AM SINGING. 456 00:35:35,890 --> 00:35:42,763 * "FORTNITE" TERMS AND CONDITIONS 457 00:35:42,763 --> 00:35:45,266 ALL RIGHT, THESE ARE THE TERMS AND CONDITIONS THAT NO ONE READS, AND THEY JUST AGREE TO. 458 00:35:45,266 --> 00:36:00,047 ALRIGHT, HERE GO "FORTNITE. * 459 00:36:00,047 --> 00:36:07,555 * PLEASE NOTE THAT UNDE 17 U.S.C. 512(F) IF YO KNOWINGLY MISREPRESENT 460 00:36:07,555 --> 00:36:12,493 THAT MATERIAL OR ACTIVITY * * IS INFRINGING YOU MAY B LIABLE FOR DAMAGES 461 00:36:12,493 --> 00:36:17,732 INCLUDIN COSTS AND ATTORNEY FEES * * INCURRED BY US OR 462 00:36:17,732 --> 00:36:22,770 OUR USERS IF YOU ARE UNSURE WHETHER THE MATERIAL OR * 463 00:36:22,770 --> 00:36:28,809 * ACTIVITY YOU ARE REPORTIN IS INFRINGIN IS INFRINGING YOU MAY * 464 00:36:28,809 --> 00:36:35,649 * WISH TO CONTACT A ATTORNEY * * 465 00:36:35,649 --> 00:36:39,153 WOO Jimmy: WOW. WOW IS ALL I CAN SAY 466 00:36:39,153 --> 00:36:44,725 THAT WAS - WOW. ALL RIGHT, THIS LAST SONG IS UP 467 00:36:44,725 --> 00:36:47,895 TO YOU, BUDDY. LET'S SEE WHAT YOU GOT * 468 00:36:47,895 --> 00:36:54,101 IT IS MY TURN [ LAUGHTER ] Jimmy: THIS IS HOW TO DRAW 469 00:36:54,101 --> 00:36:59,807 A HAND TURKEY. WELL, IT'S THANKSGIVING, SO THIS IS PERFECT. 470 00:36:59,807 --> 00:37:01,442 HOW TO DRAW A HAND TURKEY. LET'S HEAR THE -- LET'S HEAR THE GROOVE 471 00:37:01,442 --> 00:37:08,249 * * PLACE YOUR HAND AND FINGER 472 00:37:08,249 --> 00:37:13,387 STRAIGHT APART HEY ON A SHEET OF * * PAPER AND DRA 473 00:37:13,387 --> 00:37:23,197 YOUR HAN YOUR THUMB IS THE TURKEY'S HEAD * 474 00:37:23,197 --> 00:37:35,109 * DRAW AN EYE AND BEAK OR NOSE FEATHERS GO ON THE BOD 475 00:37:35,109 --> 00:37:44,418 ADD A HAT * * TO THE TURKEY'S HEA HAPPY THANKSGIVING 476 00:37:44,418 --> 00:37:51,759 HAPPY THANKSGIVING * Jimmy: THAT WAS AMAZING GIVE IT UP FOR BAD BUNNY 477 00:37:51,759 --> 00:37:57,865 CHECK OUT HIS NEW ALBUM, IT IS OUT TONIGHT. RIGHT NOW! 478 00:37:57,865 --> 00:38:01,168 "EL ULTIMO TOUR DEL MUNDO. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE "TONIGHT SHOW. 479 00:38:01,168 --> 00:38:23,791 THANKS FOR COMING ON, BUD. * Jimmy: PERFORMING "YO VISTO 480 00:38:23,791 --> 00:38:28,696 ASI," FROM HIS NEW ALBUM, "EL ULTIMO TOUR DEL MUNDO," ONCE AGAIN, BAD BUNNY 481 00:38:28,696 --> 00:38:28,729 ULTIMO TOUR DEL MUNDO," ONCE AGAIN, BAD BUNNY 482 00:38:31,432 --> 00:38:49,216 * [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE 483 00:38:49,216 --> 00:39:16,777 * * [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE 484 00:39:16,777 --> 00:39:33,894 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE * 485 00:39:34,628 --> 00:39:38,833 * 486 00:39:38,833 --> 00:40:00,087 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE * * 487 00:40:00,087 --> 00:40:27,148 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE * * 488 00:40:27,148 --> 00:40:52,640 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE * * 489 00:40:52,640 --> 00:41:20,101 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE * * 490 00:41:20,101 --> 00:41:32,646 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE * * 491 00:41:32,646 --> 00:41:37,985 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE * * 492 00:41:37,985 --> 00:41:39,754 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE * * 493 00:41:39,754 --> 00:41:41,389 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE * * 494 00:41:41,389 --> 00:41:43,124 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE * * 495 00:41:43,124 --> 00:41:44,759 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE * * 496 00:41:44,759 --> 00:41:46,527 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE * * 497 00:41:46,527 --> 00:41:47,962 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE Jimmy: THANK YOU ALL FOR WATCHING 498 00:41:47,962 --> 00:41:50,364 STAY SAFE OUT THERE. WEAR A MASK. WASH YOUR HANDS. 499 00:41:50,364 --> 00:41:52,199 DON'T TOUCH YOUR FACE. STAY TUNED FOR "LATE NIGHT WITH SETH MEYERS.