1
00:00:06,434 --> 00:00:09,074
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
2
00:00:40,468 --> 00:00:43,075
(PEOPLE YELLING, SCREAMING)
3
00:00:43,504 --> 00:00:44,934
(PANICKED GASPS)
4
00:00:48,443 --> 00:00:50,478
(TELLER SCREAMS)
(RAPID GUNFIRE)
5
00:00:55,879 --> 00:00:58,387
(GUNSHOTS)
(PEOPLE SCREAMING)
6
00:01:04,558 --> 00:01:06,395
(ROBBERS CHATTERING)
7
00:01:09,365 --> 00:01:11,532
(DEVICE BEEPING)
8
00:01:12,401 --> 00:01:14,832
(BEEPING SPEEDS UP)
(BANG)
9
00:01:35,721 --> 00:01:38,690
OFFICER 1: Go, go, go, go!
OFFICER 2: Move it, move it!
10
00:01:38,691 --> 00:01:41,297
Let’s go, let’s go!
OFFICER 3: Come on!
11
00:01:41,298 --> 00:01:42,496
CAPTAIN: It’s a powder keg
in there.
12
00:01:42,497 --> 00:01:45,764
No one moves
till we get word
from the mayor.
13
00:01:51,968 --> 00:01:54,311
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(GIRL HUMMING)
14
00:01:56,610 --> 00:01:58,545
(HUMMING CONTINUES)
15
00:01:58,546 --> 00:02:00,746
(WHISPERING) Shoot! Hey.
16
00:02:00,845 --> 00:02:03,452
Hey. Little girl.
17
00:02:03,848 --> 00:02:05,080
Stop.
18
00:02:05,586 --> 00:02:06,818
Stop!
19
00:02:08,050 --> 00:02:10,921
ROBBER: Stay down!
(OVERLAPPING YELLING)
20
00:02:12,791 --> 00:02:14,925
(YELLING DIES DOWN)
21
00:02:21,063 --> 00:02:23,373
What do you want, little one?
22
00:02:25,738 --> 00:02:26,837
Your ass.
23
00:02:26,838 --> 00:02:28,576
(GRIPPING MUSIC PLAYING)
24
00:02:30,908 --> 00:02:32,415
(METALLIC SCRAPE)
25
00:02:32,712 --> 00:02:35,044
(GRUNTS)
(GRUNTS, GAGS)
26
00:02:35,682 --> 00:02:37,013
(GRUNTING)
27
00:02:38,421 --> 00:02:39,785
(ROBBER YELPS)
28
00:02:43,393 --> 00:02:44,889
(MUNCHING)
29
00:02:46,396 --> 00:02:47,826
(GRUNTS)
30
00:02:48,596 --> 00:02:50,664
(ROBBER YELLS)
31
00:02:51,060 --> 00:02:52,896
(BOWLING PINS CLATTER)
32
00:02:52,897 --> 00:02:54,569
Boo!
(YELPS)
33
00:03:03,039 --> 00:03:03,874
(GASPS)
34
00:03:03,875 --> 00:03:05,349
(GUNSHOT)
(GROANS)
35
00:03:05,745 --> 00:03:07,251
(SIRENS APPROACHING)
36
00:03:07,252 --> 00:03:09,045
(HELICOPTER WHIRRING)
37
00:03:11,113 --> 00:03:13,687
(ELECTRIC VEHICLE HUMS)
38
00:03:14,886 --> 00:03:16,195
Well done.
39
00:03:19,264 --> 00:03:20,528
(ROBBER YELLS)
40
00:03:20,529 --> 00:03:21,958
(GRUNTS)
41
00:03:21,959 --> 00:03:24,368
(ROBBER CHOKING)
42
00:03:27,833 --> 00:03:29,340
(GRUNTS)
43
00:03:36,545 --> 00:03:37,744
Who...
44
00:03:37,942 --> 00:03:39,416
who are you?
45
00:03:39,845 --> 00:03:42,683
Frank Drebin, Police Squad.
46
00:03:43,783 --> 00:03:44,981
The new version.
47
00:03:44,982 --> 00:03:47,523
(THRILLING MUSIC PLAYING)
48
00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:00,338
(GUNSHOTS)
49
00:04:02,164 --> 00:04:03,472
(SHELL CASINGS CLATTER)
50
00:04:03,473 --> 00:04:05,706
MAN: Shoot. Um...
51
00:04:06,135 --> 00:04:07,444
(GUNSHOTS)
52
00:04:14,385 --> 00:04:15,880
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
53
00:04:15,881 --> 00:04:18,179
FRANK: My name is
Sergeant Frank Drebin,
54
00:04:18,180 --> 00:04:20,258
Detective Lieutenant,
Police Squad,
55
00:04:20,259 --> 00:04:22,524
a special division
of the LAPD.
56
00:04:22,525 --> 00:04:26,088
The day after the bank robbery
started like any other.
57
00:04:26,089 --> 00:04:28,761
I woke up in
my empty cop apartment,
58
00:04:28,762 --> 00:04:31,929
stared at a picture
of my deceased cop wife
59
00:04:31,930 --> 00:04:34,404
and choked back cop tears.
60
00:04:34,405 --> 00:04:35,966
A perfect morning? Sure.
61
00:04:35,967 --> 00:04:39,607
But I had no idea
what this city
had in store for me.
62
00:04:39,608 --> 00:04:41,774
(CYCLIST GRUNTS)
(BELL RINGING)
63
00:04:41,775 --> 00:04:43,282
CYCLIST: What the hell?
64
00:04:45,174 --> 00:04:46,515
MAN: Hey!
MAN 2: There he is.
65
00:04:46,516 --> 00:04:49,046
WOMAN: Way to go, Frank!
(APPLAUSE)
66
00:04:49,585 --> 00:04:50,387
(WHISTLES)
67
00:04:50,388 --> 00:04:52,213
Thank you. Thanks, everyone.
68
00:04:52,214 --> 00:04:53,082
What is this?
69
00:04:53,083 --> 00:04:54,919
Don’t cheer for him!
70
00:04:54,920 --> 00:04:57,494
You two, my office now!
71
00:04:57,989 --> 00:04:59,660
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(TELEPHONES RINGING)
72
00:04:59,661 --> 00:05:02,828
CHIEF DAVIS: Thanks to you,
I just spent two hours
73
00:05:02,829 --> 00:05:03,928
getting chewed out
by the mayor.
74
00:05:03,929 --> 00:05:07,503
Apparently, some of
the bank robbers
you put in the ICU,
75
00:05:07,504 --> 00:05:09,967
they’re lawyering up
to sue the city.
76
00:05:09,968 --> 00:05:12,442
That’s ridiculous.
They’re criminals.
77
00:05:12,443 --> 00:05:13,102
It’s the law.
78
00:05:13,103 --> 00:05:15,236
Since when do cops
have to follow the law?
79
00:05:15,237 --> 00:05:16,611
Since forever.
FRANK: Oh, yeah?
80
00:05:16,612 --> 00:05:19,240
And who’s going to arrest me?
Other cops?
81
00:05:19,241 --> 00:05:20,648
Yes.
Is she serious?
82
00:05:20,649 --> 00:05:21,815
Is he serious?
83
00:05:22,145 --> 00:05:23,244
He’s... no.
84
00:05:23,245 --> 00:05:24,278
Look,
let me be crystal clear.
85
00:05:24,279 --> 00:05:27,952
They are threatening
to shut down Police Squad
because of you.
86
00:05:27,953 --> 00:05:30,658
Honestly, you’re lucky
you still work here
87
00:05:30,659 --> 00:05:32,726
after last year’s
McDonald’s incident.
88
00:05:32,727 --> 00:05:34,992
They wouldn’t sell me
Freedom Fries.
89
00:05:34,993 --> 00:05:37,225
You arrested the entire staff!
90
00:05:37,226 --> 00:05:38,633
FRANK: I wasn’t
thinking clearly.
91
00:05:38,634 --> 00:05:42,164
I was furious about the
Janet Jackson Super Bowl.
92
00:05:42,165 --> 00:05:44,408
That was 20 years ago!
93
00:05:44,409 --> 00:05:45,101
Not to me.
94
00:05:45,102 --> 00:05:47,510
We understand, Chief.
You’re right.
95
00:05:47,511 --> 00:05:48,236
CHIEF DAVIS: Good.
96
00:05:48,237 --> 00:05:49,908
’Cause I’m taking you
off the bank job.
97
00:05:49,909 --> 00:05:52,878
What?
I’m putting you
on collisions.
98
00:05:52,879 --> 00:05:55,177
There’s a crash up in Malibu.
99
00:05:55,178 --> 00:05:56,145
Yes, ma’am. Thank you.
100
00:05:56,146 --> 00:06:00,392
And make sure your bodycams
are actually turned on!
101
00:06:00,920 --> 00:06:04,088
Got it. Camera will be on.
102
00:06:05,430 --> 00:06:06,595
(COFFEE SPLATS)
103
00:06:06,596 --> 00:06:07,827
CHIEF DAVIS: Drebin!
104
00:06:07,828 --> 00:06:10,798
It’s a new day
at Police Squad!
105
00:06:11,634 --> 00:06:15,230
(GROANS) Things are changing
so fast around here.
106
00:06:15,231 --> 00:06:17,936
I guess you really
can’t fight City Hall, huh?
107
00:06:17,937 --> 00:06:19,939
No. It’s a building.
108
00:06:20,577 --> 00:06:22,678
ED: Now, there’s a real man.
109
00:06:23,074 --> 00:06:25,339
They just don’t make ’em
like your pops anymore.
110
00:06:25,340 --> 00:06:29,685
FRANK: I’m glad he’s not
around to see what
Police Squad has come to.
111
00:06:30,147 --> 00:06:32,346
Mind if I take a minute, Ed?
112
00:06:32,347 --> 00:06:33,347
Of... of course.
113
00:06:33,348 --> 00:06:35,427
(SENTIMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)
114
00:06:36,351 --> 00:06:37,428
(SIGHS)
115
00:06:37,429 --> 00:06:40,124
Hi, Daddy. It’s me, Frank Jr.
116
00:06:40,465 --> 00:06:42,631
I want to be
just like you, but...
117
00:06:42,632 --> 00:06:46,800
at the same time,
be completely different
and original.
118
00:06:46,801 --> 00:06:49,539
So, if you’re proud of me,
119
00:06:49,540 --> 00:06:51,332
give me a sign, like...
120
00:06:51,333 --> 00:06:55,073
maybe make me see
an owl or something.
121
00:06:56,448 --> 00:06:57,614
ED: Hey, Dad.
122
00:06:58,417 --> 00:07:00,111
It’s me, Ed.
123
00:07:01,486 --> 00:07:03,113
Boy, do I miss you.
124
00:07:03,114 --> 00:07:04,951
(OFFICERS WEEPING)
125
00:07:07,184 --> 00:07:08,757
COP: Hey, Pops.
126
00:07:09,890 --> 00:07:11,121
(MUSIC STOPS)
127
00:07:11,122 --> 00:07:12,354
Mm-mm.
128
00:07:13,828 --> 00:07:15,191
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
129
00:07:15,192 --> 00:07:20,262
FRANK: Ed and I pulled up
to the Malibu car crash
around 2:00 p.m.
130
00:07:20,263 --> 00:07:21,197
Nothing unusual.
131
00:07:21,198 --> 00:07:25,608
But in this city,
usual is unusual... usually.
132
00:07:25,609 --> 00:07:26,510
What the hell?
133
00:07:26,511 --> 00:07:28,040
(MUFFLED RADIO CHATTER)
134
00:07:28,612 --> 00:07:30,943
So how was your
date last night, Frank?
135
00:07:30,944 --> 00:07:33,583
Ah, I couldn’t go
through with it.
136
00:07:33,584 --> 00:07:35,552
ED: You canceled?
Nope.
137
00:07:35,553 --> 00:07:36,520
I didn’t want to upset her,
138
00:07:36,521 --> 00:07:39,886
so I had Officer Barnes
tell her I was stabbed
to death.
139
00:07:39,887 --> 00:07:40,854
You’re a real
romantic, Frank.
140
00:07:40,855 --> 00:07:43,956
But everyone needs someone,
even a widower like you.
141
00:07:43,957 --> 00:07:47,190
I’m just not ready
to open myself to love again.
142
00:07:47,191 --> 00:07:50,391
I had them wait to clear
the wreck so you could
get eyes on it.
143
00:07:50,392 --> 00:07:51,766
Crash happened
around 4:00 a.m.
144
00:07:51,767 --> 00:07:54,802
Well, there are no skid marks
on the road.
145
00:07:54,803 --> 00:07:58,036
He didn’t hit the brakes
before going over.
146
00:07:58,037 --> 00:07:58,641
Drunk?
147
00:07:58,642 --> 00:08:00,841
A little. Just enough
to wake me up.
148
00:08:00,842 --> 00:08:02,238
(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING)
149
00:08:02,239 --> 00:08:02,909
Fancy car.
150
00:08:02,910 --> 00:08:06,209
ED: Yeah, it’s one
of those new
EdenTech electric ones.
151
00:08:06,210 --> 00:08:07,111
FRANK: Electric, huh?
152
00:08:07,112 --> 00:08:11,588
I remember when the
only things that were
electric were eels, chairs,
153
00:08:11,589 --> 00:08:15,020
and Catherine Zeta-Jones
in Chicago.
154
00:08:15,021 --> 00:08:17,320
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
155
00:08:20,697 --> 00:08:22,765
FRANK: Empty pill bottles.
156
00:08:26,967 --> 00:08:28,331
(SNIFFLES)
157
00:08:32,808 --> 00:08:34,007
Huh.
158
00:08:38,473 --> 00:08:40,111
Who was he?
159
00:08:40,112 --> 00:08:42,883
Simon Davenport, 53 years old.
160
00:08:42,884 --> 00:08:44,280
No wife, no kids.
161
00:08:44,281 --> 00:08:45,622
He’s got a sister
out in Hancock Park,
162
00:08:45,623 --> 00:08:49,626
but we don’t really know
anything about her
other than her name.
163
00:08:49,627 --> 00:08:51,320
Beth Davenport.
164
00:08:51,321 --> 00:08:53,993
Divorced, 5’6", 130 pounds.
165
00:08:53,994 --> 00:08:57,095
Spitfire of a personality.
Self-proclaimed chocoholic.
166
00:08:57,096 --> 00:09:02,672
Likes outdoorsy things
but is just as happy
curling up with a good book.
167
00:09:02,673 --> 00:09:04,740
All right. I’ve seen enough.
168
00:09:04,741 --> 00:09:06,545
Mark it as suicide.
169
00:09:07,370 --> 00:09:08,073
Go ahead!
170
00:09:08,074 --> 00:09:09,338
WORKER: Bring in the crane!
171
00:09:09,339 --> 00:09:11,814
(JUBILANT ARCADE MUSIC PLAYS)
172
00:09:21,923 --> 00:09:22,758
(THUDS)
173
00:09:22,759 --> 00:09:24,563
(DISAPPOINTED GROANS)
174
00:09:27,522 --> 00:09:30,096
(THRILLING MUSIC PLAYING)
175
00:09:34,463 --> 00:09:36,937
WOMAN: Oh, my God, it’s up!
MAN: Wait, I got to see
what I got!
176
00:09:36,938 --> 00:09:38,334
Yes, I got it!
MAN 2: Come on, man!
177
00:09:38,335 --> 00:09:40,810
MAN 3: She can’t even sing!
178
00:09:44,143 --> 00:09:45,979
(CUPS CLATTERING, SPLASHING)
179
00:09:45,980 --> 00:09:47,112
Lieutenant?
What’s up, Barnes?
180
00:09:47,113 --> 00:09:50,621
Look, I know you’re off
the bank job, sir, but I could
really use your advice.
181
00:09:50,622 --> 00:09:52,755
Go for it.
Look, it’s the
strangest thing.
182
00:09:52,756 --> 00:09:54,449
All the thieves had never
met each other
183
00:09:54,450 --> 00:09:56,594
and none of them knew
who they were working for.
184
00:09:56,595 --> 00:09:57,595
Brilliant!
(CHILDREN SOBBING)
185
00:09:57,596 --> 00:10:00,356
If they don’t know anything,
they can’t squeal.
186
00:10:00,357 --> 00:10:03,029
Whoever orchestrated
this is very smart.
187
00:10:03,030 --> 00:10:03,733
And get this.
188
00:10:03,734 --> 00:10:05,768
The robbers were told
that they could keep the cash.
189
00:10:05,769 --> 00:10:09,068
Who organizes a bank robbery
and doesn’t keep the cash?
190
00:10:09,069 --> 00:10:11,642
They must have been
after something else.
191
00:10:11,643 --> 00:10:13,402
Why don’t you bring in
one of the perps?
192
00:10:13,403 --> 00:10:15,008
See if we can
get them talking.
193
00:10:15,009 --> 00:10:16,538
Got it. Thank you.
194
00:10:16,945 --> 00:10:19,375
Heads up, Frank.
You got a visitor.
195
00:10:19,376 --> 00:10:23,049
I told her to wait outside,
but she just walked in.
196
00:10:23,050 --> 00:10:24,347
You want me to get rid of her?
197
00:10:24,348 --> 00:10:27,021
(SEDUCTIVE JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
198
00:10:29,089 --> 00:10:29,891
No.
199
00:10:29,892 --> 00:10:32,059
That’s okay,
I’ll deal with it.
200
00:10:38,098 --> 00:10:39,495
(JAZZ MUSIC STOPS)
201
00:10:40,903 --> 00:10:41,529
Oh.
202
00:10:41,530 --> 00:10:42,871
WOMAN: Over here, Lieutenant.
203
00:10:42,872 --> 00:10:44,940
(JAZZ MUSIC RESUMES)
204
00:10:47,470 --> 00:10:49,504
FRANK: I’d sworn off love
after my wife died,
205
00:10:49,505 --> 00:10:52,815
but this woman was
put together in all
the right ways.
206
00:10:52,816 --> 00:10:56,379
Face, head, shoulders,
knees and toes.
207
00:10:56,380 --> 00:10:57,578
Knees and toes...
208
00:10:57,579 --> 00:11:02,155
and a bottom that would make
any toilet beg for the brown.
209
00:11:03,728 --> 00:11:06,060
Sorry to keep you
waiting, ma’am.
210
00:11:07,259 --> 00:11:08,226
How may I help you?
211
00:11:08,227 --> 00:11:10,558
You’re wrong
about Simon Davenport.
212
00:11:10,559 --> 00:11:12,736
He wouldn’t commit suicide.
213
00:11:12,737 --> 00:11:13,935
Simon Davenport.
214
00:11:13,936 --> 00:11:16,036
The stiff from
the Malibu crash.
215
00:11:16,037 --> 00:11:17,906
That stiff was my brother.
216
00:11:17,907 --> 00:11:21,008
Oh, I mean... he wasn’t
that stiff, really.
217
00:11:21,009 --> 00:11:21,811
Not yet.
218
00:11:21,812 --> 00:11:23,571
More floppy and bloated.
219
00:11:23,572 --> 00:11:26,178
No, I mean, I’m so sorry
for your loss.
220
00:11:26,179 --> 00:11:27,685
Please, take a chair.
221
00:11:27,686 --> 00:11:28,785
No, thank you.
222
00:11:28,786 --> 00:11:31,019
I have plenty
of chairs at home.
223
00:11:32,790 --> 00:11:35,286
Now, Mrs...
224
00:11:35,287 --> 00:11:36,519
Davenport.
225
00:11:36,695 --> 00:11:39,356
Miss Beth Davenport.
226
00:11:39,357 --> 00:11:41,556
Mr.?
Drebin.
227
00:11:41,557 --> 00:11:42,832
Miss...
228
00:11:42,833 --> 00:11:44,933
Detective Frank Drebin.
229
00:11:44,934 --> 00:11:47,738
Detective, I think
someone murdered Simon.
230
00:11:47,739 --> 00:11:49,773
Really? What makes
you think that?
231
00:11:49,774 --> 00:11:51,104
Well, he called me last night.
232
00:11:51,105 --> 00:11:52,501
He said he was in
some kind of trouble.
233
00:11:52,502 --> 00:11:54,239
So we made plans
to meet this morning.
234
00:11:54,240 --> 00:11:57,715
Does that sound like
someone who’s planning
to kill themselves?
235
00:11:57,716 --> 00:11:59,574
No, it certainly does not.
236
00:11:59,575 --> 00:12:02,721
(CRYING) Why would someone
do that to him?
237
00:12:04,613 --> 00:12:05,723
(CRYING)
Trust me,
238
00:12:05,724 --> 00:12:08,253
there’s always a reason
to kill someone.
239
00:12:08,254 --> 00:12:11,025
Did he have an
obnoxious laugh?
240
00:12:11,026 --> 00:12:12,224
(SOBS) No.
241
00:12:12,225 --> 00:12:14,292
Forgive me,
I’m just not myself.
242
00:12:14,293 --> 00:12:16,966
That’s okay.
I’m not you, either.
243
00:12:18,033 --> 00:12:19,132
(LOUD SPLAT)
244
00:12:19,133 --> 00:12:19,836
Tell me,
245
00:12:19,837 --> 00:12:22,201
what did your brother
do for work?
246
00:12:22,202 --> 00:12:23,499
Computers.
247
00:12:23,500 --> 00:12:25,006
He was a programmer
for Richard Cane.
248
00:12:25,007 --> 00:12:28,339
The genius who’s gonna
save the world with
his electric cars.
249
00:12:28,340 --> 00:12:29,747
Well, he’s the first person
you should talk to.
250
00:12:29,748 --> 00:12:33,080
Then you could check
Simon’s driving records
and see if they match.
251
00:12:33,081 --> 00:12:34,510
Whoa, whoa. Slow down there.
252
00:12:34,511 --> 00:12:35,115
Excuse me?
253
00:12:35,116 --> 00:12:38,086
Let’s just leave the
police work to me, okay?
254
00:12:38,856 --> 00:12:40,318
Oh. I see.
255
00:12:40,319 --> 00:12:42,452
Same old story
with guys like you.
256
00:12:42,453 --> 00:12:43,156
Guys like me?
257
00:12:43,157 --> 00:12:46,127
Stubborn old men who think
they know what’s best.
258
00:12:48,591 --> 00:12:51,692
I understand you’re upset,
but this is what I do.
259
00:12:51,693 --> 00:12:54,871
If someone did
off your brother,
I’ll find him.
260
00:12:54,872 --> 00:12:58,138
I appreciate that, Detective.
But Simon was all I had.
261
00:12:58,139 --> 00:13:01,779
So you’ll forgive me
if I don’t just sit around
and hope you do your job.
262
00:13:01,780 --> 00:13:04,639
That’s exactly what
I expect you to do.
263
00:13:04,640 --> 00:13:06,949
When I have something,
I’ll contact you.
264
00:13:06,950 --> 00:13:09,820
I’m doing a series
of book readings this week.
265
00:13:09,821 --> 00:13:11,515
You can find me there.
266
00:13:11,922 --> 00:13:12,713
FRANK: Book readings?
267
00:13:12,714 --> 00:13:13,824
BETH: Yes. I write
true-crime novels
268
00:13:13,825 --> 00:13:16,586
based on fictional stories
that I make up.
269
00:13:18,159 --> 00:13:19,753
Yes, well,
270
00:13:19,754 --> 00:13:21,865
you may write about it,
271
00:13:21,866 --> 00:13:23,493
but I live it.
272
00:13:23,494 --> 00:13:27,299
Now, if you’ll excuse me,
we’re having a birthday party
273
00:13:27,300 --> 00:13:30,402
and I’m the best singer
in the office.
274
00:13:34,373 --> 00:13:37,772
On second thought,
I will take that chair.
275
00:13:38,377 --> 00:13:40,478
(CHAIR CLANGING)
276
00:13:45,285 --> 00:13:45,988
Whoa.
277
00:13:45,989 --> 00:13:49,453
FRANK: I couldn’t remember
the last time someone had
talked to me like that.
278
00:13:49,454 --> 00:13:52,929
It was the kind of
dressing down
you usually have to pay for
279
00:13:52,930 --> 00:13:55,327
in the basement of
a laundromat.
But she...
280
00:13:55,328 --> 00:13:56,229
ED: She had the kind of hips
281
00:13:56,230 --> 00:13:59,133
you wanted to put a hula hoop
on and spin.
282
00:13:59,134 --> 00:14:02,434
The kind that made you...
(MUSINGS OVERLAPPING)
283
00:14:04,337 --> 00:14:05,436
Fellas, do you mind?
284
00:14:05,437 --> 00:14:06,944
(FLUSTERED MUMBLING)
285
00:14:08,506 --> 00:14:10,540
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
286
00:14:10,541 --> 00:14:14,148
FRANK: I wasn’t convinced
Simon Davenport
had been murdered.
287
00:14:14,149 --> 00:14:17,151
But the case was starting
to give me an itch.
288
00:14:17,152 --> 00:14:18,856
And when I start to scratch,
289
00:14:18,857 --> 00:14:20,814
I don’t stop till I break skin
290
00:14:20,815 --> 00:14:24,027
and the doctor
makes me wear mittens.
291
00:14:24,929 --> 00:14:26,194
Thanks.
292
00:14:26,458 --> 00:14:30,000
(ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING)
(PARTYGOERS CHATTERING)
293
00:14:35,797 --> 00:14:37,270
Coat check?
Champagne?
294
00:14:37,271 --> 00:14:39,702
(WAITER GRUNTS)
(GLASS SHATTERS)
295
00:14:39,977 --> 00:14:42,342
(SLURPS, GAGS)
296
00:14:43,112 --> 00:14:44,377
(COINS JANGLE)
297
00:14:44,839 --> 00:14:46,312
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
298
00:14:46,313 --> 00:14:50,019
FRANK: Richard Cane had
made his first fortune
in microprocessors,
299
00:14:50,020 --> 00:14:54,485
and then used it
to build a vast
online retail marketplace
300
00:14:54,486 --> 00:14:57,192
and green technology empire.
301
00:14:57,522 --> 00:15:00,030
(BOISTEROUS LAUGHTER)
302
00:15:00,294 --> 00:15:03,934
Then, suddenly,
the bear charges towards me.
303
00:15:03,935 --> 00:15:05,826
I ready my knife,
304
00:15:05,827 --> 00:15:07,135
and he barrels right past me
305
00:15:07,136 --> 00:15:10,370
to a honey hive
above the campsite!
306
00:15:10,799 --> 00:15:13,042
It had been there all along!
307
00:15:13,043 --> 00:15:14,835
And I hadn’t seen it.
308
00:15:14,836 --> 00:15:16,376
(GUFFAWS)
309
00:15:17,377 --> 00:15:19,214
(FORCED LAUGHTER)
310
00:15:21,249 --> 00:15:23,779
Ah. You’ve arrived.
311
00:15:24,780 --> 00:15:26,187
Lieutenant Drebin.
312
00:15:26,188 --> 00:15:27,221
Me, too!
I’m Richar...
313
00:15:27,222 --> 00:15:29,388
(CLEARS THROAT) Richard Cane.
314
00:15:29,389 --> 00:15:31,424
Please, walk with me.
315
00:15:31,688 --> 00:15:35,064
So, what can you tell me
about Mr. Davenport?
316
00:15:35,065 --> 00:15:37,165
Simon was
a brilliant engineer,
317
00:15:37,166 --> 00:15:38,529
and one of our best.
318
00:15:38,530 --> 00:15:41,037
I had no idea
he was so terribly depressed.
319
00:15:41,038 --> 00:15:44,469
(GUESTS GASPING)
Suicide is a dreadful thing.
320
00:15:44,470 --> 00:15:45,866
Possible suicide.
321
00:15:45,867 --> 00:15:47,373
You suspect something foul?
322
00:15:47,374 --> 00:15:49,804
No. A chicken probably
couldn’t do this.
323
00:15:49,805 --> 00:15:52,048
But I’m not ruling
anything out.
324
00:15:52,049 --> 00:15:52,609
I see.
325
00:15:52,610 --> 00:15:55,183
Was this one of the projects
Simon was working on?
326
00:15:55,184 --> 00:15:58,846
No, what you see here
is a red light therapy machine
327
00:15:58,847 --> 00:16:00,551
proven to
increase testosterone.
328
00:16:00,552 --> 00:16:04,093
Did you know that
men’s sperm count
is at historic lows
329
00:16:04,094 --> 00:16:06,425
across the board?
Fascinating.
330
00:16:06,426 --> 00:16:08,922
I’ve never put my
sperm across a board.
331
00:16:08,923 --> 00:16:11,926
I have an old
Bon Jovi T-shirt
for that.
332
00:16:13,598 --> 00:16:14,598
(SIZZLING)
333
00:16:14,599 --> 00:16:18,041
You know, I hope you
don’t think it’s awkward
my saying this,
334
00:16:18,042 --> 00:16:21,143
but I’m actually
a big fan of yours.
335
00:16:21,144 --> 00:16:21,979
Is that so?
Yes.
336
00:16:21,980 --> 00:16:24,443
I read about your work
at the bank robbery.
337
00:16:24,444 --> 00:16:27,348
Guys like you
are a dying breed.
338
00:16:27,579 --> 00:16:30,086
Guys like me?
Yes, men of action
339
00:16:30,087 --> 00:16:33,485
who don’t ask permission
to fix what they know
is broken.
340
00:16:33,486 --> 00:16:35,520
I’m surprised to hear
you say that,
341
00:16:35,521 --> 00:16:38,754
coming from someone
who’s so into these gadgets.
342
00:16:38,755 --> 00:16:43,429
Oh. You don’t enjoy
the marvels
of the modern age?
343
00:16:43,430 --> 00:16:46,333
No offense, but the world
was better before.
344
00:16:46,334 --> 00:16:49,370
I agree,
but don’t tell anyone.
345
00:16:50,470 --> 00:16:51,701
Uh, cigar?
346
00:16:51,702 --> 00:16:53,539
Looks it to me.
347
00:16:53,803 --> 00:16:55,838
No, would you like one?
348
00:16:56,245 --> 00:16:57,575
Smoking indoors?
349
00:16:57,576 --> 00:16:59,313
Care to write me a ticket?
350
00:16:59,314 --> 00:17:01,514
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
351
00:17:04,022 --> 00:17:05,485
That matchbook.
352
00:17:05,716 --> 00:17:07,520
I’ve seen it before.
353
00:17:08,785 --> 00:17:10,258
It’s the Bengal.
354
00:17:10,259 --> 00:17:13,063
It’s a supper club I own
for some of the city’s elite.
355
00:17:13,064 --> 00:17:16,330
It’s the kind of place where
men can be themselves,
356
00:17:16,331 --> 00:17:17,958
have a few drinks and, uh,
357
00:17:17,959 --> 00:17:20,433
like the Black Eyed Peas
once said,
358
00:17:20,434 --> 00:17:21,996
"get retarded in here."
359
00:17:22,436 --> 00:17:24,338
You can still say that word?
360
00:17:24,339 --> 00:17:25,900
In my club, you can.
361
00:17:25,901 --> 00:17:28,144
Well, I love
the Black Eyed Peas.
362
00:17:28,145 --> 00:17:30,003
Who doesn’t?
I know a few people.
363
00:17:30,004 --> 00:17:32,478
They’re fools.
I know.
364
00:17:32,479 --> 00:17:34,909
will.i.am.
apl.de.ap.
365
00:17:34,910 --> 00:17:35,448
Taboo.
366
00:17:35,449 --> 00:17:38,484
Don’t forget Fergie.
I would never forget Fergie.
367
00:17:38,485 --> 00:17:40,322
BOTH: The Dutchess.
368
00:17:40,652 --> 00:17:41,652
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
369
00:17:41,653 --> 00:17:43,489
Well,
if you need anything,
370
00:17:43,490 --> 00:17:45,921
please don’t
hesitate to call.
371
00:17:46,196 --> 00:17:48,528
Thank you. I’ll be in touch.
372
00:17:54,303 --> 00:17:57,207
Uh, it’s that way.
Of course.
373
00:18:01,244 --> 00:18:02,443
Huh.
374
00:18:03,312 --> 00:18:04,906
(SHARP INHALE)
375
00:18:04,907 --> 00:18:09,977
Why don’t we get Mr. Drebin
a little gift for tomorrow?
376
00:18:09,978 --> 00:18:12,221
(OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYING)
377
00:18:12,222 --> 00:18:13,321
The EdenVox-1.
378
00:18:13,322 --> 00:18:17,325
Police Squad’s first ever
fully automated, self-driving
379
00:18:17,326 --> 00:18:18,623
electric vehicle.
380
00:18:18,624 --> 00:18:20,526
A gift we just received
from Richard Cane.
381
00:18:20,527 --> 00:18:24,057
You must’ve made
some kind of impression
last night, Frank.
382
00:18:24,058 --> 00:18:25,498
Yeah, it would seem so.
383
00:18:25,499 --> 00:18:26,532
Coffee?
Yes, thank you.
384
00:18:26,533 --> 00:18:29,634
(COFFEE SPLATTERS)
TECH: Don’t be shy, fellas.
Come check it out.
385
00:18:29,635 --> 00:18:30,932
(WELCOMING CHIME)
386
00:18:30,933 --> 00:18:32,407
(FRANK GRUNTS)
387
00:18:33,111 --> 00:18:34,309
Snug.
(CHUCKLES)
388
00:18:34,310 --> 00:18:35,574
TECH: All electric.
389
00:18:35,575 --> 00:18:38,071
Zero to sixty in 3.1 seconds.
390
00:18:38,072 --> 00:18:40,040
I guess that’s good.
391
00:18:40,041 --> 00:18:41,074
TECH: Watch this.
392
00:18:41,075 --> 00:18:43,714
Car, open doors.
393
00:18:43,715 --> 00:18:45,321
(GRUNTS)
394
00:18:45,684 --> 00:18:48,048
Neat trick.
(CHUCKLES) Now you try.
395
00:18:48,049 --> 00:18:49,984
(CAR DOOR PINGING)
396
00:18:49,985 --> 00:18:51,052
Car...
397
00:18:51,195 --> 00:18:52,525
please, close doors.
398
00:18:52,526 --> 00:18:53,856
(GENTLE CHIME)
(ED GROANING)
399
00:18:53,857 --> 00:18:56,464
(FINGERS CRUNCH)
(STRAINED SCREAM)
400
00:18:57,091 --> 00:18:58,091
Hey!
401
00:18:58,092 --> 00:18:59,169
Pretty fun, I guess.
402
00:18:59,170 --> 00:19:00,896
Okay, how about this? Car...
403
00:19:00,897 --> 00:19:03,768
drive forward 30 feet.
404
00:19:04,098 --> 00:19:05,638
(FRANK CHUCKLES)
405
00:19:06,969 --> 00:19:08,344
(CLATTERING)
406
00:19:09,103 --> 00:19:11,776
(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)
407
00:19:13,041 --> 00:19:15,449
Pretty smooth.
All right.
408
00:19:15,450 --> 00:19:17,485
(CLANKING)
409
00:19:19,080 --> 00:19:21,257
(ALARM BLARING)
410
00:19:21,258 --> 00:19:22,291
Impressive.
411
00:19:22,292 --> 00:19:23,655
ED: Hey! Guys?
412
00:19:23,656 --> 00:19:25,052
COP: Freeze!
Don’t--
413
00:19:25,053 --> 00:19:26,394
(OFFICERS YELLING)
414
00:19:26,395 --> 00:19:27,792
(GUNSHOTS)
415
00:19:29,464 --> 00:19:32,830
I tell you, this place
is falling apart.
416
00:19:34,568 --> 00:19:37,867
I got half a dozen witnesses
that place you on the scene.
417
00:19:37,868 --> 00:19:40,001
We know you were at the bank!
418
00:19:40,002 --> 00:19:42,972
I’m telling you,
I wasn’t there.
419
00:19:43,577 --> 00:19:45,579
(SIGHS IN EXASPERATION)
420
00:19:45,843 --> 00:19:47,042
Thanks, Park.
421
00:19:48,219 --> 00:19:52,255
This is quite the rap sheet
you’ve got here.
422
00:19:52,256 --> 00:19:56,656
It says you served
20 years
for "man’s laughter."
423
00:19:56,887 --> 00:19:58,690
Must have been quite the joke.
424
00:19:58,691 --> 00:20:00,396
You mean "manslaughter"?
425
00:20:03,300 --> 00:20:05,092
(OVER SPEAKERS) Well...
426
00:20:05,093 --> 00:20:06,830
we know your boss
didn’t want cash.
427
00:20:06,831 --> 00:20:10,933
So what was the point
of the robbery?
What did he want?
428
00:20:10,934 --> 00:20:13,771
I... wasn’t... there.
429
00:20:13,772 --> 00:20:15,443
You think you’re so smart.
430
00:20:15,444 --> 00:20:20,613
Well, I think my bodycam
might tell a different story.
431
00:20:20,614 --> 00:20:21,615
Ed?
432
00:20:23,584 --> 00:20:26,454
Technology really
is something.
433
00:20:26,455 --> 00:20:30,953
Police Squad is all about
"transparency" these days.
434
00:20:30,954 --> 00:20:33,396
(SCATTING ABSENTMINDEDLY)
435
00:20:34,892 --> 00:20:38,191
Dispatch, this is Drebin.
10-7.
436
00:20:38,192 --> 00:20:39,566
Oh, yeah!
437
00:20:39,567 --> 00:20:41,162
A chili dog.
438
00:20:42,273 --> 00:20:43,438
(GROANS)
439
00:20:43,439 --> 00:20:44,670
Mm-hmm!
440
00:20:44,671 --> 00:20:46,166
Breakfast of champions.
441
00:20:46,167 --> 00:20:47,409
FRANK: And a little
black coffee.
442
00:20:47,410 --> 00:20:50,413
Okay, you can
fast-forward a bit.
443
00:20:50,545 --> 00:20:52,348
(FAST-FORWARDING)
444
00:20:52,349 --> 00:20:54,416
FRANK: License and
registration, please.
445
00:20:54,417 --> 00:20:56,584
MAN: Uh... (CLEARS THROAT)
446
00:20:57,387 --> 00:20:58,288
Uh... (CHUCKLES)
447
00:20:58,289 --> 00:20:59,454
This isn’t mine.
448
00:20:59,455 --> 00:21:01,049
(WET FLATULENCE)
FRANK: Excuse me.
449
00:21:01,050 --> 00:21:03,260
(FARTING CONTINUES)
FRANK: Oh, boy. Listen, uh,
450
00:21:03,261 --> 00:21:04,294
you seem like a decent fella.
451
00:21:04,295 --> 00:21:07,187
I’m gonna let you off
with a warning.
Have a great day, bye.
452
00:21:07,188 --> 00:21:10,630
It’s much later in the day.
Fast-forward a while.
453
00:21:10,631 --> 00:21:12,027
(FAST-FORWARDING)
454
00:21:12,028 --> 00:21:13,864
You’ll see. Just wait.
455
00:21:13,865 --> 00:21:15,228
(STRAINED SIGH)
456
00:21:15,229 --> 00:21:17,736
I need a bathroom. Oh, God.
457
00:21:17,737 --> 00:21:20,068
Come on, move, move, move!
458
00:21:20,069 --> 00:21:22,345
Focus, Frank, focus.
459
00:21:22,346 --> 00:21:24,446
You got this, you got this.
460
00:21:24,447 --> 00:21:27,285
(FRANK CRIES OUT,
MOANS ON MONITOR)
461
00:21:27,945 --> 00:21:28,615
(GRUNTS)
462
00:21:28,616 --> 00:21:29,649
Maybe a little more.
463
00:21:29,650 --> 00:21:31,211
I’m gonna ruin another suit!
464
00:21:31,212 --> 00:21:33,422
Barnes!
(PANICKED GROANING)
465
00:21:33,423 --> 00:21:34,115
BARNES: Sorry.
466
00:21:34,116 --> 00:21:35,457
(FOOTAGE FAST-FORWARDING)
467
00:21:35,458 --> 00:21:36,755
FRANK: Police business!
468
00:21:36,756 --> 00:21:39,395
Uh, there is a line,
man! (SCREAMS)
469
00:21:39,396 --> 00:21:40,826
(CUSTOMERS SCREAMING)
470
00:21:43,730 --> 00:21:45,094
FRANK: Come on!
471
00:21:45,567 --> 00:21:47,404
(FOOTAGE FAST-FORWARDING)
472
00:21:48,438 --> 00:21:51,969
You’re disgusting,
you stupid idiot.
473
00:21:52,508 --> 00:21:55,708
Breastfed until you were 13,
you freak.
474
00:21:55,709 --> 00:21:56,775
(FOOTAGE FAST-FORWARDING)
475
00:21:56,776 --> 00:22:01,484
Can’t get it up without
the stench of milk
on your chin.
476
00:22:02,078 --> 00:22:03,881
(VOICE TREMBLING)
Don’t you dare.
477
00:22:03,882 --> 00:22:06,280
Don’t do it. Don’t eat it!
478
00:22:06,720 --> 00:22:08,886
SUSPECT: Oh, God!
Frank.
479
00:22:08,887 --> 00:22:10,525
I had five more that day.
480
00:22:10,526 --> 00:22:12,989
Feel better, Frank?
You better believe it.
481
00:22:12,990 --> 00:22:15,190
Mm!
(FOOTAGE FAST-FORWARDING)
482
00:22:17,467 --> 00:22:19,601
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
483
00:22:20,294 --> 00:22:20,799
Yes!
484
00:22:20,800 --> 00:22:24,198
That’s you inside the bank,
plain as day.
485
00:22:24,199 --> 00:22:24,869
Okay, fine.
486
00:22:24,870 --> 00:22:27,509
Whoever we was working for,
they was crazy.
487
00:22:27,510 --> 00:22:31,238
I mean, they just wanted
us to get some
safe deposit box.
488
00:22:31,239 --> 00:22:32,977
Safe deposit box.
489
00:22:33,747 --> 00:22:35,177
(FRANK GRUNTS)
490
00:22:40,655 --> 00:22:43,019
There. Box 595.
491
00:22:43,020 --> 00:22:45,726
Ed, check the list.
ED: Yep.
492
00:22:46,991 --> 00:22:49,960
You’re not gonna believe
this one, Frank.
493
00:22:49,961 --> 00:22:51,962
Simon Davenport.
494
00:22:51,963 --> 00:22:53,932
FRANK: So you’re saying,
495
00:22:54,405 --> 00:22:56,165
these two cases...
496
00:22:56,869 --> 00:22:58,409
are one case.
497
00:22:59,476 --> 00:23:02,973
Gentlemen, when you joined me
to launch EdenTech,
498
00:23:02,974 --> 00:23:04,910
it was with one goal.
499
00:23:05,207 --> 00:23:05,976
To save the world.
500
00:23:05,977 --> 00:23:09,309
Together, we’ve created
technologies to rival
the Gods.
501
00:23:09,310 --> 00:23:11,146
Has the world
gotten any better?
502
00:23:11,147 --> 00:23:14,116
No. It’s only gotten worse.
503
00:23:14,117 --> 00:23:17,086
Now, when the Founding Fathers
created this country,
504
00:23:17,087 --> 00:23:22,025
they sat in a room like this,
filled with men like us,
505
00:23:22,026 --> 00:23:24,401
and birthed an empire.
506
00:23:24,402 --> 00:23:26,129
The USA.
507
00:23:26,767 --> 00:23:28,163
Yes, that’s right.
508
00:23:28,164 --> 00:23:29,439
But as years went by,
509
00:23:29,440 --> 00:23:32,706
other people wanted
to get into that room.
510
00:23:32,707 --> 00:23:33,410
Fish people.
511
00:23:33,411 --> 00:23:34,906
What?
MAN: Fish people.
512
00:23:34,907 --> 00:23:36,303
Gills on their necks.
513
00:23:36,304 --> 00:23:39,647
I don’t--
Like mermen and merwomen.
514
00:23:39,648 --> 00:23:41,077
Mermaids.
Right.
515
00:23:41,078 --> 00:23:43,277
CANE: No, stop.
Not fish people.
516
00:23:43,278 --> 00:23:44,421
Ungrateful people.
517
00:23:44,422 --> 00:23:48,755
People that did not earn
their seat at the table.
518
00:23:48,756 --> 00:23:52,495
People not built
like the men in this room.
519
00:23:52,496 --> 00:23:53,122
Crab hands.
520
00:23:53,123 --> 00:23:55,828
They had crab hands
instead of fingers.
521
00:23:55,829 --> 00:23:59,062
Stop! I know what I mean.
So just let me do the talking.
522
00:23:59,063 --> 00:24:01,999
This is a crab-hand person.
I’ve met him.
523
00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:03,573
Put the phone away!
524
00:24:05,036 --> 00:24:05,772
(CANE CLEARS THROAT)
525
00:24:05,773 --> 00:24:08,401
Now, it is time
for us to admit
526
00:24:08,402 --> 00:24:11,008
that the path we are on
is not working.
527
00:24:11,009 --> 00:24:12,240
The system’s broken.
528
00:24:12,241 --> 00:24:15,915
And what does one do when
a system is malfunctioning?
529
00:24:16,047 --> 00:24:17,521
You unplug it.
530
00:24:18,115 --> 00:24:19,248
And then,
531
00:24:19,985 --> 00:24:20,919
you plug it in again.
532
00:24:20,920 --> 00:24:25,055
I call it the Primordial
Law of Toughness Device.
533
00:24:25,056 --> 00:24:27,255
Now let me show you
what it’s capable of.
534
00:24:27,256 --> 00:24:31,633
Last year, we set up cameras
at the local community center.
535
00:24:31,634 --> 00:24:34,394
Decided to run
a little experiment.
536
00:24:34,395 --> 00:24:35,263
The question.
537
00:24:35,264 --> 00:24:36,506
What would happen
to modern humans
538
00:24:36,507 --> 00:24:41,105
if you reverted their psyche
to an original
state of nature?
539
00:24:41,479 --> 00:24:44,206
(BEEPING, PULSE EMANATES)
(CACOPHONOUS YELLING)
540
00:24:44,207 --> 00:24:47,781
When activated, the device
sends an audio frequency
541
00:24:47,782 --> 00:24:51,279
that reduces the brain
to its animalistic core.
542
00:24:51,280 --> 00:24:53,820
(YELLING)
In this case,
the frequency was limited.
543
00:24:53,821 --> 00:24:58,528
But next time, it will spread
through every smart device
544
00:24:58,529 --> 00:25:01,091
until the entire world
is infected.
545
00:25:01,092 --> 00:25:02,191
As for us, upon detonation,
546
00:25:02,192 --> 00:25:06,503
we will decamp to one of my
super bunkers around the world
547
00:25:06,504 --> 00:25:08,296
where there will be
food and water,
548
00:25:08,297 --> 00:25:11,739
and the best
live entertainment
the world has to offer.
549
00:25:11,740 --> 00:25:13,070
What’s up, evil billionaires?
550
00:25:13,071 --> 00:25:16,271
I am so excited to
be doing live shows
551
00:25:16,272 --> 00:25:17,371
for as long as it takes,
552
00:25:17,372 --> 00:25:19,472
in the Doomsday
Giggle Bunkeroom
553
00:25:19,473 --> 00:25:22,882
located in Block 4
of the Arizona District.
554
00:25:22,883 --> 00:25:24,411
See you there!
555
00:25:24,412 --> 00:25:25,753
Amish Paradise.
556
00:25:25,754 --> 00:25:26,380
Hmm.
557
00:25:26,381 --> 00:25:27,887
And when the embers
have died down,
558
00:25:27,888 --> 00:25:31,484
any survivors left
will have earned
their place alongside us,
559
00:25:31,485 --> 00:25:33,453
and we will return to a world
560
00:25:33,454 --> 00:25:36,599
that is but a blank slate
upon which we can rebuild
561
00:25:36,600 --> 00:25:40,130
as the founding fathers
of a new Eden.
562
00:25:40,131 --> 00:25:42,033
Gentlemen, lady,
563
00:25:42,034 --> 00:25:44,498
this New Year’s Eve,
I give you...
564
00:25:45,268 --> 00:25:46,576
Project Inferno!
565
00:25:46,577 --> 00:25:48,546
(CRACKLING EXPLOSION)
566
00:25:54,376 --> 00:25:56,477
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
567
00:25:58,985 --> 00:26:02,218
FRANK: It turned out that
Cane’s nightclub
was only half a mile
568
00:26:02,219 --> 00:26:04,660
from where
Simon Davenport crashed.
569
00:26:04,661 --> 00:26:05,793
And that got me thinking.
570
00:26:05,794 --> 00:26:07,795
Maybe he had been there
the night he died.
571
00:26:07,796 --> 00:26:10,600
So I hopped into
my new electric cruiser...
(SNORING)
572
00:26:10,601 --> 00:26:12,393
...and told it
to head to Malibu.
573
00:26:12,394 --> 00:26:13,801
CONSOLE: Warning.
Please take the wheel.
574
00:26:13,802 --> 00:26:16,364
Warning.
Please take the wheel.
(WORKER YELLING)
575
00:26:16,365 --> 00:26:17,772
CONSOLE: Warning.
Please take the wheel.
576
00:26:17,773 --> 00:26:21,039
Collision detected.
Please take the wheel.
(GRUNTS)
577
00:26:21,040 --> 00:26:22,975
Get out of the road! Move!
(WOMAN SCREAMING)
578
00:26:22,976 --> 00:26:25,582
What’s wrong with you people?
CONSOLE: Collision detected.
579
00:26:25,583 --> 00:26:29,510
What is this city coming to?
(PEOPLE SCREAMING)
580
00:26:31,149 --> 00:26:33,789
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
581
00:26:36,187 --> 00:26:38,255
(PATRONS SOFTLY CHATTER)
582
00:26:48,397 --> 00:26:50,068
What can I get you?
583
00:26:50,069 --> 00:26:52,466
I was wondering
if you could help me.
584
00:26:52,467 --> 00:26:56,746
I’m looking for a friend
who may have been here before.
585
00:26:56,944 --> 00:26:58,373
Nah, I haven’t seen him.
586
00:26:58,374 --> 00:27:01,277
You hardly looked at it.
I saw enough.
587
00:27:01,278 --> 00:27:03,686
(GLASS SQUEAKING)
588
00:27:03,687 --> 00:27:05,755
You don’t remember me,
do you?
589
00:27:06,283 --> 00:27:06,953
Should I?
590
00:27:06,954 --> 00:27:10,220
My brother, you shot him
"in the name of justice."
591
00:27:10,221 --> 00:27:12,222
That can literally be
thousands of people.
592
00:27:12,223 --> 00:27:13,960
Shot him in the back
as he ran away.
593
00:27:13,961 --> 00:27:15,126
Hundreds.
Unarmed.
594
00:27:15,127 --> 00:27:16,127
At least 50.
He was white.
595
00:27:16,128 --> 00:27:19,702
(RAPS COUNTER)
So you’re
Tony Roiland’s brother!
596
00:27:19,703 --> 00:27:20,329
That’s right.
597
00:27:20,330 --> 00:27:23,200
How is old Tony?
Are you serious?
598
00:27:23,201 --> 00:27:24,466
Bad.
599
00:27:25,566 --> 00:27:26,599
Right.
600
00:27:26,600 --> 00:27:29,008
So, your friend,
maybe I have seen him.
601
00:27:29,009 --> 00:27:30,340
Maybe I haven’t.
602
00:27:30,780 --> 00:27:32,110
(WHISPERING) I can’t remember.
603
00:27:32,111 --> 00:27:34,475
You can’t remember, huh?
Nah.
604
00:27:34,476 --> 00:27:37,049
Well, maybe
this’ll jog your memory.
605
00:27:37,050 --> 00:27:38,821
(THUDS)
BARKEEP: Oh!
606
00:27:39,547 --> 00:27:40,757
Ah!
607
00:27:41,582 --> 00:27:42,516
Oof!
608
00:27:42,517 --> 00:27:44,551
Gah!
(BARKEEP GRUNTS)
609
00:27:44,552 --> 00:27:46,520
That’s better. Remember now?
610
00:27:46,521 --> 00:27:47,257
Yeah, I remember.
611
00:27:47,258 --> 00:27:49,864
He sat in a corner booth.
He had a drink.
612
00:27:49,865 --> 00:27:50,766
But that’s all I know.
613
00:27:50,767 --> 00:27:52,867
Where do they keep
surveillance footage?
614
00:27:52,868 --> 00:27:55,133
(GROANS) In the back.
615
00:27:55,134 --> 00:27:57,939
But even I’m not
allowed in there.
616
00:28:00,238 --> 00:28:02,372
(BOISTEROUS LAUGHTER)
617
00:28:04,044 --> 00:28:05,110
Thank you.
618
00:28:05,111 --> 00:28:06,849
(GLISSANDO)
619
00:28:07,278 --> 00:28:09,477
FRANK: And there
she was again.
620
00:28:09,478 --> 00:28:11,919
I had to admit,
she was beautiful.
621
00:28:11,920 --> 00:28:14,449
She had a body
that carried her head around,
622
00:28:14,450 --> 00:28:16,319
and a butt that seemed to say,
623
00:28:16,320 --> 00:28:19,026
"Hello, I’m a talking butt."
624
00:28:19,389 --> 00:28:21,621
Elegant? Yeah, I’d say so.
625
00:28:21,622 --> 00:28:22,391
(THUDS)
Oh!
626
00:28:22,392 --> 00:28:24,965
FRANK: But like a teenager
with three babysitting jobs,
627
00:28:24,966 --> 00:28:27,902
I didn’t need another
babysitting job.
628
00:28:27,903 --> 00:28:29,233
Hello, Lieutenant.
629
00:28:29,234 --> 00:28:30,872
What the hell
are you doing here?
630
00:28:30,873 --> 00:28:32,335
I’m doing
the same thing you are.
631
00:28:32,336 --> 00:28:34,843
I told you I wasn’t gonna
sit around and wait.
632
00:28:34,844 --> 00:28:37,076
Listen, this isn’t
one of your stories.
633
00:28:37,077 --> 00:28:41,509
Average civilian women
don’t suddenly solve crimes.
634
00:28:41,510 --> 00:28:43,314
Oh, you read my book.
635
00:28:43,578 --> 00:28:44,985
What’d you think?
636
00:28:44,986 --> 00:28:46,580
I think it’s a fantasy.
637
00:28:46,581 --> 00:28:49,022
A woman puts on
a wig and sunglasses
638
00:28:49,023 --> 00:28:50,925
and suddenly
she’s an assassin?
639
00:28:50,926 --> 00:28:52,796
But did you enjoy it?
640
00:28:53,159 --> 00:28:55,128
It had some good parts.
641
00:28:55,931 --> 00:28:56,931
CANE: Ah!
642
00:28:56,932 --> 00:28:58,031
Lieutenant Drebin.
643
00:28:58,032 --> 00:29:00,594
Does he know
you’re Simon’s sister?
644
00:29:00,595 --> 00:29:03,201
No.
Good. Let’s keep it that way.
645
00:29:03,202 --> 00:29:04,873
What a wonderful surprise.
646
00:29:04,874 --> 00:29:06,369
Fine, thank you.
647
00:29:06,370 --> 00:29:08,371
Beautiful place
you’ve got here.
648
00:29:08,372 --> 00:29:10,538
Can’t smell
the dead animals at all.
649
00:29:10,539 --> 00:29:11,815
Thank you.
650
00:29:12,211 --> 00:29:13,607
Uh, can I get you a drink?
651
00:29:13,608 --> 00:29:15,378
Just water. And sparkling.
652
00:29:15,379 --> 00:29:17,788
(SNAPS FINGERS)
(CRACKLING)
653
00:29:19,449 --> 00:29:22,682
And who is
this stunning creature?
654
00:29:22,683 --> 00:29:23,958
I don’t believe we’ve met.
655
00:29:23,959 --> 00:29:27,622
Well, I’m--
Uh, th...
this is Miss...
656
00:29:27,864 --> 00:29:29,129
Cherry...
657
00:29:29,932 --> 00:29:31,428
Roosevelt...
658
00:29:31,626 --> 00:29:34,133
Fat Bozo Chowing Spaghetti.
659
00:29:34,134 --> 00:29:36,906
What an interesting name.
Yes. (NERVOUS GIGGLE)
660
00:29:37,302 --> 00:29:37,873
Thank you.
661
00:29:37,874 --> 00:29:39,402
So, Lieutenant,
what brings you here?
662
00:29:39,403 --> 00:29:43,879
I was hoping you could
let me take a look at
your security footage.
663
00:29:43,880 --> 00:29:45,672
Oh. May I ask why?
664
00:29:45,673 --> 00:29:47,378
Go right ahead.
665
00:29:51,547 --> 00:29:52,118
Uh...
666
00:29:52,119 --> 00:29:54,186
Unfortunately, I can’t
show you security footage.
667
00:29:54,187 --> 00:29:56,551
Our members trust
that we will provide them
668
00:29:56,552 --> 00:29:59,191
with the highest
level of privacy.
669
00:29:59,192 --> 00:30:00,830
I hope you understand.
670
00:30:00,831 --> 00:30:02,261
I’m starting to.
671
00:30:02,525 --> 00:30:04,295
Well, thank you so much
for the drink.
672
00:30:04,296 --> 00:30:07,199
It’s getting late.
We really must be going.
673
00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:07,727
So soon?
674
00:30:07,728 --> 00:30:10,235
I hope you’re not leaving,
too, Miss Spaghetti.
675
00:30:10,236 --> 00:30:12,666
Oh, well, I--
Yes, she’s leaving, too.
676
00:30:12,667 --> 00:30:15,174
Early morning
at Disneyland tomorrow.
677
00:30:15,175 --> 00:30:16,571
She’s one of
those Disney adults.
678
00:30:16,572 --> 00:30:19,816
Obsessed, really.
Her bed is covered in dolls.
679
00:30:19,817 --> 00:30:24,018
(FORCED CHUCKLE)
Oh, Miss Spaghetti,
please stay for a drink.
680
00:30:24,019 --> 00:30:26,614
Uh, you don’t mind,
do you, Drebin?
681
00:30:26,615 --> 00:30:27,516
Be my guest.
682
00:30:27,517 --> 00:30:29,651
Wonderful. I’ll get a table.
683
00:30:29,992 --> 00:30:31,454
(CANE CHUCKLES)
684
00:30:31,455 --> 00:30:34,094
You get the footage,
I’ll keep him occupied.
685
00:30:34,095 --> 00:30:36,361
I’m... Absolutely not!
686
00:30:43,665 --> 00:30:45,238
Oh, thank you.
687
00:30:46,206 --> 00:30:48,504
Wow. This place is amazing.
688
00:30:48,505 --> 00:30:50,275
CANE: Ah. Thank you.
689
00:30:50,276 --> 00:30:52,948
Miss Spaghetti,
may I speak freely?
690
00:30:52,949 --> 00:30:54,345
I’d prefer English.
691
00:30:54,346 --> 00:30:56,215
You’re much
too sophisticated...
(GUARD GRUNTS)
692
00:30:56,216 --> 00:30:58,118
...for the likes
of Frank Drebin.
693
00:30:58,119 --> 00:30:59,856
Oh. I’m not with Drebin.
694
00:30:59,857 --> 00:31:02,386
Oh. Well,
that’s wonderful news!
(GUARD GRUNTING)
695
00:31:02,387 --> 00:31:04,488
(CANE CHUCKLES)
GUARD: Oof!
696
00:31:05,060 --> 00:31:06,688
(PAINED GROAN)
697
00:31:11,462 --> 00:31:12,825
Cheers.
698
00:31:12,826 --> 00:31:14,464
From Bill Cosby’s
private estate.
699
00:31:14,465 --> 00:31:16,631
BETH: Mm.
(SPITS DRINK)
700
00:31:16,632 --> 00:31:18,975
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)
701
00:31:29,645 --> 00:31:32,252
(FLOORBOARD CREAKS)
(TENSE MUSIC STOPS)
702
00:31:33,253 --> 00:31:35,090
(TENSE MUSIC RESUMES)
703
00:31:37,191 --> 00:31:39,897
(DUCK QUACKS, WINGS FLAPPING)
(TENSE MUSIC STOPS)
704
00:31:41,822 --> 00:31:43,934
(TENSE MUSIC RESUMES)
705
00:31:46,398 --> 00:31:47,596
Gah! Oof!
(TENSE MUSIC STOPS)
706
00:31:47,597 --> 00:31:50,940
(FRANK GRUNTING)
(THUDS)
707
00:31:50,941 --> 00:31:52,337
(OBJECTS CLATTERING)
708
00:31:52,338 --> 00:31:54,505
(PAINED GROANS)
709
00:31:54,978 --> 00:31:56,374
(FRANK GRUNTS)
710
00:31:56,375 --> 00:31:58,409
That hurt!
(CELLPHONE RINGS)
711
00:31:58,410 --> 00:32:01,346
FRANK: (WHISPERING) Shoot!
(CELLPHONE BEEPS)
712
00:32:01,347 --> 00:32:04,184
Mom, Mom,
now is not a good time.
713
00:32:04,185 --> 00:32:06,417
Mom, please,
I’ll call you back.
714
00:32:06,418 --> 00:32:09,453
I got to go. I got to go.
I got to go now.
715
00:32:09,454 --> 00:32:11,554
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
716
00:32:11,555 --> 00:32:12,962
BETH: So, tell me,
717
00:32:12,963 --> 00:32:14,623
what have you been
working on lately?
718
00:32:14,624 --> 00:32:18,198
Oh, let’s not talk about work.
Let’s talk about play.
719
00:32:18,199 --> 00:32:19,694
(CANE CHUCKLES)
720
00:32:19,695 --> 00:32:20,431
(INAUDIBLE)
721
00:32:20,432 --> 00:32:22,829
Uh, do you like jazz,
Miss Spaghetti?
722
00:32:22,830 --> 00:32:24,402
Like it?
Hm.
723
00:32:24,403 --> 00:32:26,470
I love it.
I love it.
724
00:32:26,471 --> 00:32:29,341
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
725
00:32:29,342 --> 00:32:31,113
Sir. Um...
726
00:32:31,641 --> 00:32:32,982
(WHISPERING)
We’ve got a problem.
727
00:32:32,983 --> 00:32:33,741
CANE: Not now.
728
00:32:33,742 --> 00:32:35,612
GUSTAFSON: No, it’s quite...
Not now.
729
00:32:36,118 --> 00:32:38,989
Yes, sir.
(MIC FEEDBACK WHINES)
730
00:32:39,286 --> 00:32:42,058
This one’s for my
electric new friend,
731
00:32:42,520 --> 00:32:43,916
Richard Cane.
732
00:32:43,917 --> 00:32:45,522
(CHUCKLING) Wow!
733
00:32:45,523 --> 00:32:47,491
Sassafras Chicken in D.
734
00:32:47,492 --> 00:32:49,967
Make it extra lumpy, boys.
735
00:32:53,102 --> 00:32:55,566
(SCATTING)
736
00:33:03,310 --> 00:33:07,445
FRANK: I’ve always said
fighting is a lot like
jazz music.
737
00:33:07,446 --> 00:33:08,281
A scat-like improv
738
00:33:08,282 --> 00:33:12,483
where one lets imagination
take control of their body.
739
00:33:12,484 --> 00:33:13,946
(CRIES OUT)
740
00:33:13,947 --> 00:33:14,991
(PANTING)
741
00:33:14,992 --> 00:33:16,785
(BOTH GRUNTING)
742
00:33:17,390 --> 00:33:18,423
Huh?
743
00:33:18,424 --> 00:33:20,162
(PAINED GROAN)
744
00:33:20,954 --> 00:33:23,396
(SCATTING RAPIDLY)
745
00:33:26,762 --> 00:33:29,401
(SLOWING, SOBS)
Oh...
746
00:33:29,402 --> 00:33:30,633
(SHARP INHALE) I’m fine.
747
00:33:30,634 --> 00:33:33,241
(CHUCKLES)
(YIPS AND HOWLS)
748
00:33:34,044 --> 00:33:35,837
(BOTH GRUNTING)
749
00:33:38,576 --> 00:33:42,975
(GRUNTING)
(DING)
750
00:33:42,976 --> 00:33:45,319
(HONKS)
(BETH SCATTING)
751
00:33:48,784 --> 00:33:50,818
(SCATTING CONTINUES)
752
00:33:50,819 --> 00:33:52,259
Yeah! (LAUGHS)
753
00:33:52,260 --> 00:33:54,063
(BETH SCATTING OVER MONITOR)
754
00:33:54,064 --> 00:33:56,561
(GRIPPING MUSIC PLAYING)
755
00:34:05,405 --> 00:34:09,177
There’s two things I love.
My stay-at-home girlfriend
756
00:34:09,178 --> 00:34:10,310
and Gorilla Nut...
Come on.
757
00:34:10,311 --> 00:34:12,543
...enhanced drink
supplement for men.
758
00:34:12,544 --> 00:34:14,248
Don’t follow fad diets
and fake workouts.
759
00:34:14,249 --> 00:34:15,447
(SIGHS)
You want to get ripped?
760
00:34:15,448 --> 00:34:18,913
All you need is Muscle Slime.
Rub it on and--
761
00:34:24,721 --> 00:34:26,954
Well, look at that.
762
00:34:30,892 --> 00:34:34,863
And who are you, my secret
eavesdropping friend?
763
00:34:37,602 --> 00:34:40,340
Douglas O’Reilly,
investigative journalist,
764
00:34:40,341 --> 00:34:42,541
L.A. Chronicle.
(MONITOR BEEPS)
765
00:34:43,003 --> 00:34:45,709
(MEN SHOUTING ON MONITOR)
Shoot.
766
00:34:49,009 --> 00:34:50,086
(BEEPING)
767
00:34:50,087 --> 00:34:52,452
(HOWLING AND YIPPING SHRILLY)
768
00:34:53,156 --> 00:34:54,321
(ALARM SOUNDS)
769
00:34:54,322 --> 00:34:56,126
(INDISTINCT CROWD CHATTER)
770
00:34:58,821 --> 00:34:59,953
(CANE CLEARS THROAT)
771
00:34:59,954 --> 00:35:03,528
It seems Mr. Drebin
might be more of a problem
than we thought.
772
00:35:03,529 --> 00:35:04,859
I want you to keep
an eye on him.
773
00:35:04,860 --> 00:35:08,401
And make sure he doesn’t cause
any more distractions.
774
00:35:08,402 --> 00:35:09,601
Yes, sir.
775
00:35:11,933 --> 00:35:13,737
(NOTIFICATION BUZZES)
776
00:35:20,348 --> 00:35:22,680
Davis. This better be good.
777
00:35:23,549 --> 00:35:25,154
He did what?
778
00:35:25,155 --> 00:35:26,914
Get me Drebin this instant!
779
00:35:26,915 --> 00:35:29,884
Ma’am, I’m so sorry,
but you have to listen to me.
780
00:35:29,885 --> 00:35:32,018
There’s something deeper
going on here.
781
00:35:32,019 --> 00:35:32,689
(SHUSHES)
782
00:35:32,690 --> 00:35:34,295
(WHISPERING) You wake up
my husband, I swear to God...
783
00:35:34,296 --> 00:35:37,694
(WHISPERING) I’m sorry.
What the hell
were you thinking, Drebin?
784
00:35:37,695 --> 00:35:39,399
Richard Cane is
a very powerful man.
785
00:35:39,400 --> 00:35:42,094
And he makes a lot of hefty
donations to this city,
786
00:35:42,095 --> 00:35:44,404
including the new car
you’re driving.
787
00:35:44,405 --> 00:35:45,240
Richard Cane is dirty.
788
00:35:45,241 --> 00:35:47,935
He’s involved with
the Simon Davenport murder.
789
00:35:47,936 --> 00:35:50,036
And by the way,
the bank job, too!
790
00:35:50,037 --> 00:35:52,280
You’re still working
the bank job?
791
00:35:52,281 --> 00:35:54,106
That’s it.
You’re suspended!
792
00:35:54,107 --> 00:35:56,218
(LOUDLY) Suspended?
(SHUSHES)
793
00:35:56,219 --> 00:35:57,780
What did I say
about waking Ronald?
794
00:35:57,781 --> 00:36:00,189
He has a Fitzgerald
presentation tomorrow.
(SNORING)
795
00:36:00,190 --> 00:36:05,458
And if Morimoto doesn’t
accept his
vertical-integration pitch,
796
00:36:05,459 --> 00:36:09,759
Bill Cantor will leapfrog him
for the third year in a row.
797
00:36:09,760 --> 00:36:12,091
But Ronald trained Bill.
Exactly!
798
00:36:12,092 --> 00:36:13,400
I’ve got no choice.
799
00:36:13,401 --> 00:36:15,765
I’m putting you on ice.
Two weeks.
800
00:36:15,766 --> 00:36:16,865
Effective immediately.
801
00:36:16,866 --> 00:36:18,637
Now get out.
(SIGHS)
802
00:36:19,132 --> 00:36:21,903
(WHISPERING) We’re all
rooting for you, Ronald.
803
00:36:21,904 --> 00:36:23,840
Give ’em hell tomorrow.
804
00:36:25,347 --> 00:36:27,712
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
805
00:36:37,788 --> 00:36:39,460
BETH: Rough night?
(GASPS)
806
00:36:40,461 --> 00:36:41,692
Oh. It’s you.
807
00:36:41,693 --> 00:36:44,563
Now tell me.
What’d you see
on the security footage?
808
00:36:44,564 --> 00:36:46,565
Listen. I feel for you.
I really do.
809
00:36:46,566 --> 00:36:49,502
But I had to beat up
a lot of henchmen tonight.
810
00:36:49,503 --> 00:36:50,371
Men with daughters!
811
00:36:50,372 --> 00:36:53,341
Oh, come on. You wouldn’t
even have seen it
if I didn’t help you.
812
00:36:53,342 --> 00:36:54,342
Help me? That’s rich.
813
00:36:54,343 --> 00:36:58,808
Now, if you’ll excuse me,
I’m tired, I’m hungry.
814
00:36:58,809 --> 00:37:00,712
Goodnight, Miss Davenport.
815
00:37:03,979 --> 00:37:06,684
What if we had
a little dinner, together?
816
00:37:06,685 --> 00:37:08,753
I sure could go for a...
817
00:37:09,182 --> 00:37:09,753
bite.
818
00:37:09,754 --> 00:37:13,152
Slow down, chef.
This turkey burns at 450.
819
00:37:13,153 --> 00:37:16,155
How hot was I cooking?
About a thousand.
820
00:37:16,156 --> 00:37:18,300
Turkey needs slow and low.
821
00:37:18,301 --> 00:37:20,401
Unless you like
your center pink.
822
00:37:20,402 --> 00:37:22,403
Oh, I love my centers pink.
823
00:37:22,404 --> 00:37:25,967
You’re not worried
the rare meat
will ruin a good stuffing?
824
00:37:25,968 --> 00:37:28,871
As long as you don’t mind
if I get salmonella.
825
00:37:28,872 --> 00:37:31,313
Mind it? I prefer it.
826
00:37:31,314 --> 00:37:33,613
I like a sick little boy.
827
00:37:34,581 --> 00:37:37,584
You’re not gonna stop
hounding me, are you?
828
00:37:37,848 --> 00:37:39,487
Not for a second.
829
00:37:40,785 --> 00:37:42,952
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
830
00:37:44,888 --> 00:37:46,890
(DISTANT DOG BARKS)
831
00:38:01,344 --> 00:38:02,609
Thank you.
832
00:38:05,315 --> 00:38:08,142
(VELCRO RIPS)
(PIANO MUSIC PLAYS)
833
00:38:09,319 --> 00:38:11,816
Uh... excuse the mess.
834
00:38:12,014 --> 00:38:12,783
I, uh...
835
00:38:12,784 --> 00:38:15,357
haven’t had
the heart to clean...
(CLATTERING)
836
00:38:15,358 --> 00:38:17,294
...since my wife died.
837
00:38:20,660 --> 00:38:23,596
My condolences.
How did she pass?
838
00:38:23,597 --> 00:38:25,631
Great. Fifty yards easy.
839
00:38:25,632 --> 00:38:27,436
Arm like a cannon.
840
00:38:27,898 --> 00:38:29,602
And then she died.
841
00:38:29,603 --> 00:38:32,099
So we’ll never know
if she could’ve gone pro.
842
00:38:32,100 --> 00:38:34,970
She was the sweetest woman
I’ve ever known.
843
00:38:34,971 --> 00:38:36,169
She sounds like a saint.
844
00:38:36,170 --> 00:38:38,875
Or maybe a Bronco or a 49er.
845
00:38:38,876 --> 00:38:41,845
We would’ve been happy
with any team, really.
846
00:38:41,846 --> 00:38:43,947
Anyone but the Browns.
847
00:38:49,018 --> 00:38:50,150
That’s quite a view you have.
848
00:38:50,151 --> 00:38:54,396
You know, I’ve been drawn
to the hills ever since
I moved here for college.
849
00:38:54,397 --> 00:38:55,595
UCLA?
850
00:38:55,596 --> 00:38:58,026
I see it every day.
I live here.
851
00:38:58,027 --> 00:39:01,436
FRANK: I’m afraid I don’t
have much to offer.
852
00:39:01,437 --> 00:39:02,900
Hmm.
853
00:39:04,000 --> 00:39:06,199
However...
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
854
00:39:06,200 --> 00:39:08,036
All that turkey talk outside
855
00:39:08,037 --> 00:39:10,379
got me in the
Thanksgiving mood.
856
00:39:10,380 --> 00:39:14,042
I think I have a full turkey
around here somewhere.
857
00:39:14,043 --> 00:39:15,747
But my oven is filthy.
858
00:39:15,748 --> 00:39:19,212
I don’t mind.
I like a dirty bird.
859
00:39:19,213 --> 00:39:21,281
Mm-hmm.
860
00:39:22,722 --> 00:39:24,823
(SIRENS IN DISTANCE)
861
00:39:28,695 --> 00:39:29,861
(SIGHS)
862
00:39:31,731 --> 00:39:33,502
(BUZZING)
863
00:39:38,903 --> 00:39:39,903
(GROANS)
864
00:39:39,904 --> 00:39:41,543
(SCRUBBING)
865
00:39:42,412 --> 00:39:45,139
You weren’t lying.
This oven is disgusting!
866
00:39:45,140 --> 00:39:48,813
It sure was fun to talk
about a dirty bird, but...
867
00:39:48,814 --> 00:39:50,617
it would be unsanitary.
868
00:39:50,618 --> 00:39:52,554
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
869
00:39:55,722 --> 00:39:57,459
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
870
00:39:57,460 --> 00:39:59,857
BOTH: Oops.
(LAUGHING)
871
00:39:59,858 --> 00:40:02,464
Well, hot brine
is the most important part.
872
00:40:02,465 --> 00:40:04,191
It sure is.
(GIGGLES)
873
00:40:04,192 --> 00:40:05,995
Uh-oh. This is my Buster.
Oh!
874
00:40:05,996 --> 00:40:09,295
(BETH CHUCKLES)
He must’ve smelled
what’s going on.
875
00:40:09,296 --> 00:40:10,539
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
876
00:40:12,640 --> 00:40:14,235
(GUSTAFSON EXHALES)
877
00:40:15,445 --> 00:40:17,006
(GASPS)
878
00:40:17,007 --> 00:40:18,007
(CHUCKLES)
879
00:40:18,008 --> 00:40:21,077
Silly dog, that’s not for you.
880
00:40:21,550 --> 00:40:22,848
GUSTAFSON: Ew.
881
00:40:25,345 --> 00:40:26,522
Okay.
882
00:40:27,314 --> 00:40:28,854
(WINCES)
883
00:40:29,217 --> 00:40:29,854
Ah.
884
00:40:29,855 --> 00:40:32,692
(LAUGHS) He’s so strong.
(BUSTER GROWLS)
885
00:40:32,693 --> 00:40:34,431
Put that down.
886
00:40:35,256 --> 00:40:38,357
How about some
nice scratches instead?
887
00:40:38,358 --> 00:40:40,260
(LAUGHS)
Oh.
888
00:40:40,261 --> 00:40:41,295
Yes.
889
00:40:43,968 --> 00:40:45,508
GUSTAFSON: Wow.
890
00:40:46,102 --> 00:40:48,367
I don’t like this.
891
00:40:48,368 --> 00:40:49,940
(BOTH LAUGH)
892
00:40:49,941 --> 00:40:51,403
(ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING)
893
00:40:51,404 --> 00:40:54,450
Oh, your hair. May I?
894
00:40:54,451 --> 00:40:56,079
Oh. Yes.
895
00:41:00,116 --> 00:41:02,283
(CRUNCHING)
896
00:41:04,021 --> 00:41:05,528
That’s better.
897
00:41:05,726 --> 00:41:07,353
BETH: Is this crazy?
898
00:41:07,354 --> 00:41:08,728
It’s been a long time.
899
00:41:08,729 --> 00:41:12,326
I’m afraid I may have
forgotten how to kiss.
900
00:41:12,733 --> 00:41:15,570
Mmm.
Mmm.
901
00:41:15,571 --> 00:41:17,100
(KISSES)
Mmm.
902
00:41:17,771 --> 00:41:20,807
(BOTH GROANING SOFTLY)
903
00:41:24,514 --> 00:41:27,517
(NOTHING’S GONNA STOP US NOW
BY STARSHIP PLAYING)
904
00:41:31,444 --> 00:41:32,951
BETH: Oh, wow.
905
00:41:33,446 --> 00:41:35,656
How beautiful.
(CHUCKLES)
906
00:41:35,657 --> 00:41:38,527
MALE SINGER:
♪ Lookin’ in your eyes
907
00:41:38,528 --> 00:41:39,924
♪ I see a paradise
908
00:41:39,925 --> 00:41:44,764
♪ This world that I found
Is too good to be true
909
00:41:44,765 --> 00:41:45,831
(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)
910
00:41:45,832 --> 00:41:48,130
♪ Standin’ here beside you
911
00:41:48,131 --> 00:41:49,901
♪ Want so much to give you
912
00:41:49,902 --> 00:41:53,608
♪ This love in my heart
That I’m feeling for you
913
00:41:53,609 --> 00:41:54,874
(WHOOSHING)
914
00:41:56,271 --> 00:41:59,141
FEMALE SINGER:
♪ Let ’em say we’re crazy
915
00:41:59,142 --> 00:42:00,681
♪ I don’t care about that
916
00:42:00,682 --> 00:42:05,818
♪ Put your hand in my hand
Baby, don’t ever look back
917
00:42:05,819 --> 00:42:10,988
♪ Let the world around us
Just fall apart
918
00:42:10,989 --> 00:42:15,795
♪ Baby, we can make it
If we’re heart to heart
919
00:42:15,796 --> 00:42:16,697
(WHOOSHING)
920
00:42:16,698 --> 00:42:20,899
♪ And we can build
This dream together
921
00:42:20,900 --> 00:42:23,429
♪ Standing strong forever
922
00:42:23,430 --> 00:42:27,070
♪ Nothing’s gonna stop us now
923
00:42:27,071 --> 00:42:30,843
♪ And if this world
Runs out of lovers
924
00:42:30,844 --> 00:42:33,615
♪ We’ll still have each other
925
00:42:33,616 --> 00:42:36,013
♪ Nothing’s gonna stop us
926
00:42:36,014 --> 00:42:38,752
♪ Nothing’s gonna stop us now
927
00:42:38,753 --> 00:42:40,622
(INHALER PUFFS)
928
00:42:40,623 --> 00:42:42,724
♪ Whoa, whoa
929
00:42:43,186 --> 00:42:45,924
MALE SINGER:
♪ I’m so glad I found you
930
00:42:45,925 --> 00:42:48,157
♪ I’m not gonna lose you
931
00:42:48,158 --> 00:42:53,569
♪ Whatever it takes
I will stay here with you
932
00:42:53,570 --> 00:42:55,670
♪ Take it to the good times
933
00:42:55,671 --> 00:42:57,969
♪ See it through the bad times
934
00:42:57,970 --> 00:43:03,645
♪ Whatever it takes
Is what I’m gonna do
935
00:43:03,646 --> 00:43:08,276
FEMALE SINGER:
♪ Let them say we’re crazy
What do they know?
936
00:43:08,277 --> 00:43:13,886
♪ Put your arms around me
Baby, don’t ever let go
937
00:43:13,887 --> 00:43:18,253
♪ Let the world around us
Just fall apart
938
00:43:18,254 --> 00:43:24,094
♪ Baby, we can make it
If we’re heart to heart
939
00:43:24,095 --> 00:43:26,933
(SONG SLOWS DOWN, DISTORTING)
940
00:43:31,300 --> 00:43:32,905
(THUNDER CLAPS)
(PUFFING)
941
00:43:32,906 --> 00:43:34,908
(SINISTER MUSIC PLAYING)
942
00:43:36,470 --> 00:43:38,406
(BETH SCREAMING)
943
00:43:39,847 --> 00:43:40,649
(GASPING)
944
00:43:40,650 --> 00:43:42,245
(FRANK PANTING)
945
00:43:44,016 --> 00:43:45,952
(GASPING, WHEEZING)
946
00:43:47,921 --> 00:43:49,659
(CLICKS)
(INHALES)
947
00:43:50,627 --> 00:43:51,925
(CLICKING)
948
00:43:59,031 --> 00:44:01,066
(METAL CLINKS, ECHOES)
949
00:44:04,003 --> 00:44:08,336
♪ And we can build
This dream together
950
00:44:08,337 --> 00:44:11,240
♪ Standing strong forever
951
00:44:11,241 --> 00:44:13,814
♪ Nothing’s gonna stop us now
952
00:44:13,815 --> 00:44:15,684
♪ Nothing’s gonna stop us
953
00:44:15,685 --> 00:44:18,313
♪ And if this world
Runs out of lovers
954
00:44:18,314 --> 00:44:20,821
♪ We’ll still have each other
955
00:44:20,822 --> 00:44:26,190
♪ Nothing’s gonna stop us
Now ♪
956
00:44:27,829 --> 00:44:29,555
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
957
00:44:29,556 --> 00:44:32,591
FRANK: After a relaxing
weekend away with Beth...
958
00:44:32,592 --> 00:44:33,735
CYCLIST: (SCREAMS) Not again!
959
00:44:33,736 --> 00:44:35,869
...it was time to
get back to the case.
960
00:44:35,870 --> 00:44:38,135
So I called the
L.A. Chronicle news desk
961
00:44:38,136 --> 00:44:39,906
to follow up
on Douglas O’Reilly,
962
00:44:39,907 --> 00:44:42,942
but was informed that
he hadn’t made it into work.
963
00:44:42,943 --> 00:44:45,242
So I headed to his apartment.
964
00:44:46,716 --> 00:44:48,409
Douglas O’Reilly?
965
00:44:48,410 --> 00:44:52,018
Lieutenant Frank Drebin here,
Police Squad.
966
00:44:55,351 --> 00:44:56,924
(DOOR CREAKS)
967
00:44:59,454 --> 00:45:00,961
Hello?
968
00:45:03,623 --> 00:45:05,295
Anyone home?
969
00:45:06,835 --> 00:45:08,198
(SQUELCH)
970
00:45:08,199 --> 00:45:09,771
Oh, no.
971
00:45:09,772 --> 00:45:13,665
Hey, Douglas, I stepped in
some kind of red liquid!
972
00:45:13,666 --> 00:45:15,943
You got any paper towels?
973
00:45:16,713 --> 00:45:19,507
I’m dragging it
all over your place.
974
00:45:21,674 --> 00:45:22,817
Huh.
975
00:45:22,818 --> 00:45:24,676
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)
976
00:45:24,677 --> 00:45:27,514
I picked up
your knife for you!
977
00:45:27,515 --> 00:45:29,418
Where do you want it?
978
00:45:31,354 --> 00:45:33,026
(READING)
979
00:45:37,591 --> 00:45:39,064
(CLICKS)
980
00:45:39,065 --> 00:45:41,363
Lieutenant Frank Drebin.
981
00:45:41,364 --> 00:45:43,432
I did it.
(CLICKS)
982
00:45:43,740 --> 00:45:46,105
Okay.
(OBJECTS CLATTER)
983
00:45:47,777 --> 00:45:50,043
O’Reilly, that you?
984
00:45:59,415 --> 00:46:00,790
O’Reilly?
985
00:46:02,649 --> 00:46:03,925
(GASPS)
986
00:46:10,833 --> 00:46:12,163
And that’s when it hit me.
987
00:46:12,164 --> 00:46:15,034
Like an idiot’s
finished jigsaw puzzle,
988
00:46:15,035 --> 00:46:17,168
I was being framed.
989
00:46:17,169 --> 00:46:19,104
I needed to clean
the crime scene.
990
00:46:19,105 --> 00:46:21,172
No body, no crime.
(GROANS)
991
00:46:21,173 --> 00:46:22,371
(FAN RATTLES)
992
00:46:22,372 --> 00:46:23,702
(BLOOD SPURTS)
(GROANS)
993
00:46:23,703 --> 00:46:25,913
Hiding the body was
no longer an option.
994
00:46:25,914 --> 00:46:27,443
COP: Freeze!
995
00:46:27,883 --> 00:46:28,949
It’s not what it looks like!
996
00:46:28,950 --> 00:46:30,544
(GRIPPING MUSIC PLAYING)
997
00:46:30,545 --> 00:46:31,711
(BODY THUDS)
998
00:46:35,748 --> 00:46:36,925
He’s running!
999
00:46:39,356 --> 00:46:41,556
(PANTING) Car, drive.
1000
00:46:45,725 --> 00:46:47,935
Thank you, car.
(CAR DINGS)
1001
00:46:47,936 --> 00:46:50,631
(LATCHES CLICK,
ELECTRIC ENGINE WHIRS)
What the...
1002
00:46:50,873 --> 00:46:52,875
(ACCELERATING)
1003
00:46:53,370 --> 00:46:55,042
Car, stop it.
1004
00:46:55,339 --> 00:46:55,976
I said stop!
1005
00:46:55,977 --> 00:46:58,847
Hello, Drebin.
Mind if I take the wheel?
1006
00:46:58,848 --> 00:47:00,442
Cane. What’s going on?
1007
00:47:00,443 --> 00:47:02,345
I’ve taken control of the car.
1008
00:47:02,346 --> 00:47:03,709
It’s a little trick I have
1009
00:47:03,710 --> 00:47:05,348
for when I want
to fix mistakes.
1010
00:47:05,349 --> 00:47:06,778
So that’s how Davenport died.
1011
00:47:06,779 --> 00:47:09,022
He didn’t drive himself
off a cliff, you did.
1012
00:47:09,023 --> 00:47:10,485
Now you’re getting
somewhere, Detective.
1013
00:47:10,486 --> 00:47:13,521
But not before he spilled
your secrets to that reporter.
1014
00:47:13,522 --> 00:47:14,830
So you went
and killed him, too.
1015
00:47:14,831 --> 00:47:16,898
I didn’t kill him, Frank.
You did.
1016
00:47:16,899 --> 00:47:18,900
You’re the crazy cop
who stabbed the reporter
1017
00:47:18,901 --> 00:47:20,869
and then drove himself
into the ocean.
1018
00:47:20,870 --> 00:47:22,971
The hell I am.
(HANDLE CLICKING)
1019
00:47:23,367 --> 00:47:24,598
There’s no escape, Drebin.
1020
00:47:24,599 --> 00:47:26,435
I’m just a little sad
that you won’t be there
1021
00:47:26,436 --> 00:47:29,537
to see what I have in store
when the New Year’s Eve
balls drop.
1022
00:47:29,538 --> 00:47:31,473
Oh, well. Have a nice trip.
1023
00:47:31,474 --> 00:47:33,607
(LINE DISCONNECTS)
(PHONE CLICKS ON TABLE)
1024
00:47:33,608 --> 00:47:35,852
(SIZZLING)
Ohh. (SIGHS)
1025
00:47:37,018 --> 00:47:38,282
Hi, Susan.
1026
00:47:38,283 --> 00:47:40,152
(ELECTRIC ENGINE WHIRS)
1027
00:47:40,153 --> 00:47:41,517
(BEEPING)
1028
00:47:42,122 --> 00:47:43,453
(CHIMES)
1029
00:47:52,264 --> 00:47:53,903
(GRUNTS)
(GLASS SHATTERS)
1030
00:48:04,210 --> 00:48:06,706
Move! Move, move!
1031
00:48:06,707 --> 00:48:08,049
(YELPS)
1032
00:48:09,578 --> 00:48:10,920
(GRUNTING)
1033
00:48:12,053 --> 00:48:13,482
(BUZZING)
FRANK: Bees?
1034
00:48:13,483 --> 00:48:15,386
No. No. No!
1035
00:48:16,684 --> 00:48:18,191
(BUZZING)
1036
00:48:18,587 --> 00:48:20,094
(ACCELERATING)
1037
00:48:23,295 --> 00:48:25,792
Move! Out of the way! Move!
1038
00:48:33,635 --> 00:48:35,208
(BEEPING)
1039
00:48:39,146 --> 00:48:40,575
(CLIPPY READING)
1040
00:48:40,576 --> 00:48:42,313
What? Open the doors!
1041
00:48:42,314 --> 00:48:44,382
CLIPPY: You got it!
(DINGS)
1042
00:48:46,989 --> 00:48:48,188
(GRUNTS)
1043
00:48:51,257 --> 00:48:53,192
Frank! Are you okay?
Where are you?
1044
00:48:53,193 --> 00:48:55,964
Never mind that.
I know how Simon Davenport
was killed.
1045
00:48:55,965 --> 00:48:58,362
It was Richard Cane.
He drove him off the cliff.
1046
00:48:58,363 --> 00:49:00,133
Well, there’s a warrant out
for your arrest.
1047
00:49:00,134 --> 00:49:02,971
(OVER PHONE)
They’re claiming that
you killed a reporter.
1048
00:49:02,972 --> 00:49:03,939
Say it isn’t so.
1049
00:49:03,940 --> 00:49:04,830
It ain’t so, Ed.
1050
00:49:04,831 --> 00:49:05,897
There’s another thing, Frank.
1051
00:49:05,898 --> 00:49:07,635
The mayor got wind
of this whole mess
1052
00:49:07,636 --> 00:49:09,670
and they’re pulling
our funding.
What?
1053
00:49:09,671 --> 00:49:12,046
Police Squad is shut down
effective immediately.
1054
00:49:12,047 --> 00:49:14,510
This is all because of me.
I’ll fix this.
1055
00:49:14,511 --> 00:49:17,117
Do me a favor, Frank.
Lay low.
You got it.
1056
00:49:17,118 --> 00:49:18,317
Thank you, Ed.
1057
00:49:18,779 --> 00:49:19,879
(SIGHS)
1058
00:49:20,550 --> 00:49:22,453
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
1059
00:49:26,061 --> 00:49:28,756
FRANK: Excuse me, do you have
a phone I could use?
1060
00:49:29,460 --> 00:49:30,791
Thanks.
1061
00:49:31,693 --> 00:49:32,627
FRANK: As soon as I could,
1062
00:49:32,628 --> 00:49:34,332
I called Beth to
break her the news.
1063
00:49:34,333 --> 00:49:39,074
It wasn’t easy, but I hoped
it would bring her some peace.
1064
00:49:40,339 --> 00:49:41,439
Thanks.
1065
00:49:41,736 --> 00:49:43,771
What the hell, man?
1066
00:49:50,151 --> 00:49:51,515
Oh, Frank.
1067
00:49:52,351 --> 00:49:53,781
Thank you.
1068
00:49:54,155 --> 00:49:56,915
God, you’re hurt.
It’s nothing.
1069
00:49:56,916 --> 00:49:58,720
Don’t be silly. Come in.
1070
00:50:03,593 --> 00:50:05,364
This is all I could find.
1071
00:50:06,662 --> 00:50:08,136
Might sting a bit.
1072
00:50:08,598 --> 00:50:09,797
Go for it.
1073
00:50:10,501 --> 00:50:11,963
(WINCES)
1074
00:50:11,964 --> 00:50:13,767
It’s okay. Keep going.
Okay.
1075
00:50:13,768 --> 00:50:17,507
Cane said he had something big
in store tomorrow
for New Year’s Eve.
1076
00:50:17,508 --> 00:50:22,710
I’m willing to bet
it’s whatever Simon
was trying to warn us about.
1077
00:50:22,711 --> 00:50:24,481
What do you mean,
something big?
1078
00:50:24,482 --> 00:50:26,021
(GRINDING)
I don’t know.
1079
00:50:26,022 --> 00:50:27,980
But people could be in danger.
1080
00:50:28,255 --> 00:50:29,255
I see.
1081
00:50:29,256 --> 00:50:30,619
Frank, I have a confession.
1082
00:50:30,620 --> 00:50:32,357
When my brother called me
before he died,
1083
00:50:32,358 --> 00:50:35,262
he told me some things
that I haven’t told you.
1084
00:50:35,625 --> 00:50:36,262
Go on.
1085
00:50:36,263 --> 00:50:39,199
He told me he was working
on some kind of
therapeutic device.
1086
00:50:39,200 --> 00:50:40,266
Something to calm people down.
1087
00:50:40,267 --> 00:50:43,269
But he was worried now
that someone could use it
to do the opposite.
1088
00:50:43,270 --> 00:50:45,337
Calm people up?
He didn’t say.
1089
00:50:45,338 --> 00:50:47,834
He just told me
that if anything
were to happen to him,
1090
00:50:47,835 --> 00:50:51,970
I needed to do
whatever it took
to stop the device.
1091
00:50:51,971 --> 00:50:53,180
Those were
his last words to me.
1092
00:50:53,181 --> 00:50:56,513
So that’s why
you inserted yourself
into my investigation.
1093
00:50:56,514 --> 00:50:57,283
Well, at first.
1094
00:50:57,284 --> 00:51:00,187
And that’s why you showed up
at the Bengal Club.
1095
00:51:00,188 --> 00:51:01,155
Yes.
1096
00:51:01,156 --> 00:51:04,323
And that’s why
you pretended to love me.
No!
1097
00:51:04,324 --> 00:51:05,225
Frank...
1098
00:51:05,226 --> 00:51:06,457
No, how could you say that?
1099
00:51:06,458 --> 00:51:09,724
I can’t believe
I opened myself up
to love again.
1100
00:51:09,725 --> 00:51:14,730
I wrote
that whole song about it.
I rented studio space!
1101
00:51:16,435 --> 00:51:18,239
Don’t go, please.
1102
00:51:19,537 --> 00:51:21,033
Frank, please.
1103
00:51:21,374 --> 00:51:22,672
Look at me.
1104
00:51:26,742 --> 00:51:27,941
What is that?
1105
00:51:28,513 --> 00:51:30,647
What?
(SCOFFS)
1106
00:51:34,651 --> 00:51:35,684
That.
1107
00:51:35,685 --> 00:51:37,884
That’s my TiVo
that I lent you yesterday
1108
00:51:37,885 --> 00:51:40,326
so that you could watch
season one of Buffy.
1109
00:51:40,327 --> 00:51:42,757
So that you could
start getting
my references.
1110
00:51:42,758 --> 00:51:43,626
I know that, Frank.
1111
00:51:43,627 --> 00:51:47,201
And I specifically told you
not to plug it
into the internet.
1112
00:51:47,202 --> 00:51:48,829
Oh.
"Oh?"
1113
00:51:48,830 --> 00:51:50,600
That’s an Ethernet cord
1114
00:51:50,601 --> 00:51:54,065
going from my TiVo
directly into your router,
1115
00:51:54,066 --> 00:51:55,143
where the internet
comes from!
1116
00:51:55,144 --> 00:51:56,903
I was just trying to plug it
into the electricity.
1117
00:51:56,904 --> 00:51:58,608
And now
they might be expired.
1118
00:51:58,609 --> 00:52:00,347
That means gone!
1119
00:52:00,809 --> 00:52:01,974
No musical special.
1120
00:52:01,975 --> 00:52:06,253
No Xander. No Spike.
No Cordelia Chase.
1121
00:52:06,254 --> 00:52:08,013
No Daniel "Oz" Osbourne.
1122
00:52:08,014 --> 00:52:11,126
No
Willow-meets-her-doppelganger
episode. Nothing!
1123
00:52:11,127 --> 00:52:13,360
Sorry, I didn’t know
they were so--
(INTERRUPTS)
1124
00:52:14,229 --> 00:52:17,297
Frank, we’re in the middle
of an important--
(INTERRUPTS)
1125
00:52:17,298 --> 00:52:18,760
Just stand there.
1126
00:52:18,761 --> 00:52:21,434
(TiVo CHIRPING)
1127
00:52:24,866 --> 00:52:26,065
(SCOFFS)
1128
00:52:27,605 --> 00:52:28,837
They’re gone!
1129
00:52:29,244 --> 00:52:30,640
(PHONE RINGS)
1130
00:52:30,641 --> 00:52:32,774
BETH: It’s okay.
It’s just the landline.
1131
00:52:32,775 --> 00:52:34,040
I’ll get it.
1132
00:52:36,713 --> 00:52:37,383
Hello.
1133
00:52:37,384 --> 00:52:39,550
It’s Ed. I’ve got something.
1134
00:52:39,551 --> 00:52:40,683
Okay.
1135
00:52:40,684 --> 00:52:42,356
I’ll be right there.
1136
00:52:50,892 --> 00:52:52,563
FRANK: Ed had dug through
the bank footage
1137
00:52:52,564 --> 00:52:55,060
and identified a man
who’d slipped out the back,
1138
00:52:55,061 --> 00:52:58,866
who also happened to be
Cane’s head of security
and right-hand man.
1139
00:52:58,867 --> 00:53:02,738
If anyone knew Cane’s plan,
it would be him.
(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)
1140
00:53:02,739 --> 00:53:04,905
We needed to get him alone
and put the squeeze on.
1141
00:53:04,906 --> 00:53:08,447
(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING)
FRANK: But we had to do it
in our own way,
1142
00:53:08,448 --> 00:53:11,319
off the books.
We’re on our way now.
1143
00:53:13,189 --> 00:53:15,554
You’re not my normal driver.
1144
00:53:16,621 --> 00:53:20,052
(DOOR CLOSES)
This isn’t my normal car.
1145
00:53:20,053 --> 00:53:21,922
(HISSES)
1146
00:53:21,923 --> 00:53:24,156
That’s not my normal gas.
1147
00:53:25,157 --> 00:53:28,369
This isn’t the normal way
I fall asleep. (GROANS)
1148
00:53:31,933 --> 00:53:35,673
(MONITOR BEEPING)
1149
00:53:38,412 --> 00:53:40,612
(GUSTAFSON SIGHS)
1150
00:53:44,847 --> 00:53:47,046
NURSE: Hello, doctor?
He’s waking up.
1151
00:53:47,047 --> 00:53:50,082
What day is it?
NURSE: January 2nd.
1152
00:53:50,083 --> 00:53:52,293
You’ve been here
for three days.
1153
00:53:52,294 --> 00:53:53,525
Three days?
1154
00:53:53,526 --> 00:53:55,759
(EXHALES) What the...
1155
00:53:56,595 --> 00:53:58,927
Can you turn that up, please?
1156
00:53:59,334 --> 00:54:02,194
That won’t be
necessary, nurse.
1157
00:54:02,502 --> 00:54:05,131
Hello, Mr. Gustafson.
1158
00:54:05,637 --> 00:54:06,340
You!
1159
00:54:06,341 --> 00:54:07,605
Surprised to see me?
1160
00:54:07,606 --> 00:54:10,102
Your little plan,
it didn’t work out.
1161
00:54:10,103 --> 00:54:13,314
We stopped it.
The good guys won.
1162
00:54:13,315 --> 00:54:14,172
Cane’s in jail.
1163
00:54:14,173 --> 00:54:16,977
And here’s
the bad news for you.
He’s singing.
1164
00:54:16,978 --> 00:54:20,717
He told us
you killed Simon Davenport
and that reporter.
1165
00:54:20,718 --> 00:54:23,522
There’s talk you might
get the chair for this.
1166
00:54:23,523 --> 00:54:24,787
You’re lying.
Am I?
1167
00:54:24,788 --> 00:54:27,988
Mm-hmm.
Then tell me
what really happened.
1168
00:54:27,989 --> 00:54:29,562
(SCOFFS) Yeah, right.
1169
00:54:32,125 --> 00:54:32,894
Tough guy, huh?
1170
00:54:32,895 --> 00:54:37,899
You know what happens
to big pretty boys
like you in San Quentin?
1171
00:54:37,900 --> 00:54:40,198
Ooh! They’re gonna love you.
1172
00:54:40,199 --> 00:54:41,573
What are you talking about?
1173
00:54:41,574 --> 00:54:43,443
Oh, yeah.
I’ve seen it a hundred times.
1174
00:54:43,444 --> 00:54:47,546
Massive cutie pie like you?
You’ll be very popular.
1175
00:54:47,547 --> 00:54:52,782
First day in,
probably have your mugshot
go viral online.
1176
00:54:52,783 --> 00:54:54,355
The "sexy jailbird."
1177
00:54:54,356 --> 00:54:56,522
Congrats, you’re famous.
1178
00:54:56,523 --> 00:54:57,149
Okay.
1179
00:54:57,150 --> 00:55:00,361
Then one day,
your new fan army
finds a legal loophole,
1180
00:55:00,362 --> 00:55:04,365
and suddenly, you’re free!
You’re back on the streets!
1181
00:55:04,366 --> 00:55:05,696
That’s... That’s not bad.
1182
00:55:05,697 --> 00:55:08,303
Only now,
you’ve got an image to uphold.
1183
00:55:08,304 --> 00:55:09,700
The "sexy jailbird."
1184
00:55:09,701 --> 00:55:12,736
Say goodbye to carbs.
Hello, intermittent fasting.
1185
00:55:12,737 --> 00:55:16,344
You like ramen?
Well, it’s all broth
for you, baby!
1186
00:55:16,345 --> 00:55:20,106
Not to mention,
there’s a new
sexy jailbird now.
1187
00:55:20,107 --> 00:55:22,680
And he’s all about
body positivity.
1188
00:55:22,681 --> 00:55:25,276
He’s eating burgers
on the prison Instagram
1189
00:55:25,277 --> 00:55:27,278
while you’re
starving to death.
No.
1190
00:55:27,279 --> 00:55:30,589
But your brand is skinny.
You can’t change course now!
1191
00:55:30,590 --> 00:55:32,460
So you decide to end it.
1192
00:55:32,757 --> 00:55:34,219
Bang! Bullet in the head!
1193
00:55:34,220 --> 00:55:36,496
I wouldn’t do that.
But you miss.
1194
00:55:36,497 --> 00:55:39,565
You only get
the part of the brain
that regulates farts.
1195
00:55:39,566 --> 00:55:41,127
No.
Now you’re a new meme,
1196
00:55:41,128 --> 00:55:43,668
"farting guy."
Is that what you want?
1197
00:55:43,669 --> 00:55:45,032
To be "farting guy"?
No.
1198
00:55:45,033 --> 00:55:46,902
Come on,
tell me, farting guy!
No. No.
1199
00:55:46,903 --> 00:55:47,672
You love it!
No!
1200
00:55:47,673 --> 00:55:49,069
Tell me! You love it!
Stop it!
1201
00:55:49,070 --> 00:55:52,513
It was all Cane’s plan!
It wasn’t my plan!
1202
00:55:53,514 --> 00:55:54,844
What was?
1203
00:55:54,845 --> 00:55:56,208
He wanted to blast a frequency
1204
00:55:56,209 --> 00:56:00,421
that would infect
people’s brains
and turn them into savages.
1205
00:56:00,422 --> 00:56:04,623
And where
was he gonna do that?
At the WWFC fight.
1206
00:56:04,624 --> 00:56:06,020
Downtown, midnight.
1207
00:56:06,021 --> 00:56:07,990
Where was he gonna
put the device?
1208
00:56:08,155 --> 00:56:10,256
In the New Year’s balls.
1209
00:56:11,224 --> 00:56:12,500
The balls.
1210
00:56:12,797 --> 00:56:14,996
Hey... where you going?
1211
00:56:14,997 --> 00:56:15,997
I want a lawyer, okay?
1212
00:56:15,998 --> 00:56:18,296
I’m sorry that we framed you!
I’m sorry!
1213
00:56:18,297 --> 00:56:20,870
Did you get all that?
BARNES: Every word.
1214
00:56:20,871 --> 00:56:22,906
(POWER SWITCH CLICKS)
1215
00:56:28,978 --> 00:56:32,948
We don’t have much time.
It’s only 90 minutes
till New Year’s.
1216
00:56:32,949 --> 00:56:33,817
What? What is happening?
1217
00:56:33,818 --> 00:56:35,654
How is getting
a confession like this legal?
1218
00:56:35,655 --> 00:56:39,251
Sometimes to get the job done,
you have to break the law.
1219
00:56:39,252 --> 00:56:40,725
I do it all the time.
1220
00:56:40,726 --> 00:56:41,627
Huh.
1221
00:56:41,628 --> 00:56:44,356
Did we get all that?
MAN: We got it.
1222
00:56:47,832 --> 00:56:48,932
Huh?
1223
00:56:51,539 --> 00:56:52,506
BARNES: Internal Affairs.
1224
00:56:52,507 --> 00:56:55,201
You’re under arrest for
the illegal detainment
of Sig Gustafson.
1225
00:56:55,202 --> 00:56:59,370
No!
Ah! So you set me up.
Impressive.
1226
00:56:59,371 --> 00:57:00,173
Uh, just one thing,
1227
00:57:00,174 --> 00:57:02,549
how were you able to build
these sets so quickly?
1228
00:57:02,550 --> 00:57:03,979
I just told
some city contractors
1229
00:57:03,980 --> 00:57:06,883
that I’d pull their licenses
if they didn’t help us.
1230
00:57:06,884 --> 00:57:09,589
Did you get all that?
MAN: Loud and clear.
1231
00:57:09,590 --> 00:57:12,318
(ELECTRONIC WARBLING)
1232
00:57:13,154 --> 00:57:16,695
Hector Gutierrez,
Department of Occupational
Safety and Health.
1233
00:57:16,696 --> 00:57:19,258
Officer Barnes,
you are under arrest.
1234
00:57:19,259 --> 00:57:22,163
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
1235
00:57:23,637 --> 00:57:25,506
(BRAKES SQUEAL)
(GRUNTING)
1236
00:57:25,507 --> 00:57:27,740
(CROWD CHEERING)
1237
00:57:29,302 --> 00:57:31,645
What are you doing?
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)
1238
00:57:34,373 --> 00:57:35,681
(HORN BLOWING)
ANNOUNCER 1: Five minutes
down.
1239
00:57:35,682 --> 00:57:38,750
There is the horn
signifying the end
of round one.
1240
00:57:38,751 --> 00:57:41,115
ANNOUNCER 2: This crowd
is not happy, Jon.
1241
00:57:41,116 --> 00:57:42,149
All right,
very exciting stuff,
1242
00:57:42,150 --> 00:57:43,722
but we are now thrilled
to be joined
in the broadcast booth
1243
00:57:43,723 --> 00:57:46,351
by one of the most vicious
bare-knuckle brawlers
1244
00:57:46,352 --> 00:57:48,958
from the first season
of WWFC,
1245
00:57:48,959 --> 00:57:52,963
Dan "The Bloody Widowmaker"
Daly. Welcome, Dan.
1246
00:57:53,227 --> 00:57:53,930
It’s weird.
1247
00:57:53,931 --> 00:57:57,670
I, uh...
I left my wife at home
and she was wearing makeup.
1248
00:57:57,671 --> 00:57:59,364
Said she didn’t have
any plans.
1249
00:57:59,365 --> 00:58:01,740
What do you think
that’s about?
1250
00:58:01,741 --> 00:58:03,775
I don’t know.
Me, neither.
1251
00:58:03,776 --> 00:58:06,041
And of course,
none of this
would be possible
1252
00:58:06,042 --> 00:58:07,273
without tonight’s sponsor,
1253
00:58:07,274 --> 00:58:09,616
EdenTech’s Richard Cane.
1254
00:58:09,617 --> 00:58:11,784
(APPLAUSE)
1255
00:58:12,983 --> 00:58:16,854
The boys in the lab loaned me
these special earplugs.
1256
00:58:16,855 --> 00:58:18,317
They block digital frequency.
1257
00:58:18,318 --> 00:58:21,562
So if that bomb does go off,
we’re protected.
1258
00:58:21,563 --> 00:58:22,960
Nice work.
1259
00:58:23,356 --> 00:58:24,664
Now, where’s Cane?
1260
00:58:24,665 --> 00:58:25,456
Cane is in the skybox.
1261
00:58:25,457 --> 00:58:27,766
And what about backup?
There is no backup.
1262
00:58:27,767 --> 00:58:29,933
What?
You’re wanted for murder.
1263
00:58:29,934 --> 00:58:31,396
But Gustafson confessed.
1264
00:58:31,397 --> 00:58:32,133
We coerced him.
1265
00:58:32,134 --> 00:58:33,673
Haven’t you ever heard
of the Miranda rights?
1266
00:58:33,674 --> 00:58:37,105
What? I’m pretty sure
it’s Carrie that writes.
1267
00:58:37,106 --> 00:58:37,974
Miranda is a lawyer.
1268
00:58:37,975 --> 00:58:42,077
Charlotte’s an art dealer.
And Samantha’s a whore.
1269
00:58:42,078 --> 00:58:42,748
What? What is it?
1270
00:58:42,749 --> 00:58:46,620
I’ve been trying
to call Beth for hours.
She’s not picking up.
1271
00:58:46,621 --> 00:58:48,590
I just hope she’s okay.
1272
00:58:49,151 --> 00:58:50,151
EMCEE: Live...
1273
00:58:50,152 --> 00:58:55,596
from scary downtown
Los Angeles,
1274
00:58:55,597 --> 00:59:01,635
this is the main event
of the evening!
1275
00:59:01,636 --> 00:59:04,870
(EMCEE CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
1276
00:59:05,266 --> 00:59:08,808
Hmm.
(PEELING)
1277
00:59:11,272 --> 00:59:12,239
Yeah.
1278
00:59:12,240 --> 00:59:13,648
GUARD: Sir?
Yes?
1279
00:59:15,584 --> 00:59:17,718
Oh! Please.
1280
00:59:19,621 --> 00:59:21,557
Can I help you?
1281
00:59:22,723 --> 00:59:23,448
Remember me?
1282
00:59:23,449 --> 00:59:28,321
Well, hello,
Miss Cherry Roosevelt
Fat Bozo Chowing Spaghetti.
1283
00:59:28,322 --> 00:59:29,223
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
I, uh,
1284
00:59:29,224 --> 00:59:31,358
love your new look.
BETH: Thank you.
1285
00:59:31,831 --> 00:59:33,161
Please. Join me.
1286
00:59:33,162 --> 00:59:35,570
EMCEE: Ladies and gentlemen!
1287
00:59:35,571 --> 00:59:39,167
It’s...
1288
00:59:39,168 --> 00:59:43,579
time!
(CROWD CHEERING)
1289
00:59:44,679 --> 00:59:47,307
Check, check.
I’m on my way to the balls.
1290
00:59:47,308 --> 00:59:49,408
Okay, Frank, comms working.
1291
00:59:49,409 --> 00:59:53,050
I’m in position.
We have 25 minutes.
1292
00:59:53,248 --> 00:59:55,348
Hey, one beer, please.
1293
00:59:55,349 --> 00:59:56,118
We’re closed.
1294
00:59:56,119 --> 00:59:58,956
Man, come on.
One beer’s not gonna kill you.
1295
00:59:58,957 --> 01:00:01,124
One beer.
(LIQUID POURS)
1296
01:00:02,257 --> 01:00:03,422
Get lost.
1297
01:00:03,423 --> 01:00:04,027
How much?
1298
01:00:04,028 --> 01:00:05,798
It’s free. Just get
the hell out of here.
(GASPS)
1299
01:00:05,799 --> 01:00:08,130
FRANK: (OVER COMMS)
Ed, do you hear me?
I can hear you, Frank.
1300
01:00:08,131 --> 01:00:11,562
Uh-oh. I think one of
Cane’s goons is up there.
FRANK: Come in, Ed.
1301
01:00:11,563 --> 01:00:12,838
Frank, can you hear me?
FRANK: Check, check.
1302
01:00:12,839 --> 01:00:16,336
Somebody’s up there, Frank!
A guy is up there, Frank!
1303
01:00:16,337 --> 01:00:18,613
Oh, God! (SCREAMS)
1304
01:00:18,614 --> 01:00:19,878
What’s that, Ed?
ED: Oh.
1305
01:00:19,879 --> 01:00:20,813
Uh, never mind.
1306
01:00:20,814 --> 01:00:22,210
Gentlemen, we’ve been
over the rules
in the back.
1307
01:00:22,211 --> 01:00:24,542
I expect you to fight clean,
fight hard, fight fair.
1308
01:00:24,543 --> 01:00:26,511
All right, the tension
in this arena is palpable.
1309
01:00:26,512 --> 01:00:28,315
The moment of truth
is here, folks.
1310
01:00:28,316 --> 01:00:30,856
Straight to voicemail.
I’ll bet she’s with Gary.
1311
01:00:30,857 --> 01:00:33,452
Let me use your phone.
She won’t know your number.
1312
01:00:33,453 --> 01:00:35,829
You ready?
Let’s get it on!
1313
01:00:36,555 --> 01:00:37,731
(CROWD CHEERING)
1314
01:00:37,732 --> 01:00:41,427
Yeah! Let’s go! (CHUCKLES)
1315
01:00:41,428 --> 01:00:45,674
Oh! (CHUCKLES)
1316
01:00:45,872 --> 01:00:48,534
(GROANS) God, I love this.
1317
01:00:48,710 --> 01:00:50,073
Come on! (LAUGHS)
1318
01:00:50,074 --> 01:00:51,679
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)
1319
01:00:51,680 --> 01:00:53,010
CANE: Wunderbar!
1320
01:00:53,011 --> 01:00:54,176
(MUSIC INTENSIFIES)
1321
01:00:54,177 --> 01:00:55,749
(GUN CLICKS)
1322
01:00:55,750 --> 01:00:57,850
(GUN CLICKING)
1323
01:00:57,851 --> 01:01:01,448
Read any good books lately,
Miss "Spaghetti"?
1324
01:01:02,119 --> 01:01:04,054
Or should I say,
Miss Davenport?
1325
01:01:04,055 --> 01:01:07,057
I especially like the part
where the erudite housewife
1326
01:01:07,058 --> 01:01:11,766
transforms herself into
a would-be assassin
seeking revenge,
1327
01:01:12,767 --> 01:01:14,703
hiding a... (GRUNTS)
1328
01:01:14,934 --> 01:01:16,165
...gun...
1329
01:01:16,166 --> 01:01:17,805
in her garter belt.
1330
01:01:19,235 --> 01:01:21,071
And another...
(GASPS)
1331
01:01:21,072 --> 01:01:23,305
...in the small of her back.
1332
01:01:24,636 --> 01:01:25,813
And a...
1333
01:01:26,110 --> 01:01:27,980
shotgun...
(RATTLING)
1334
01:01:28,310 --> 01:01:30,245
...in her beautiful...
1335
01:01:30,246 --> 01:01:31,753
brunette wig.
1336
01:01:31,984 --> 01:01:33,050
Tie her up.
1337
01:01:33,051 --> 01:01:35,724
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
1338
01:01:38,727 --> 01:01:41,520
Okay, Ed... I’m at the balls.
1339
01:01:41,521 --> 01:01:45,129
I’m gonna look
for the device.
(CHEERING IN DISTANCE)
1340
01:01:47,626 --> 01:01:48,802
ED: Nice work, Frank.
1341
01:01:48,803 --> 01:01:50,969
MAN: Hey,
you got free beer?
1342
01:01:50,970 --> 01:01:52,971
No, there’s not free--
1343
01:01:52,972 --> 01:01:54,005
Oh, boy.
1344
01:01:54,006 --> 01:01:56,601
It’s got to be
in here somewhere.
1345
01:01:56,602 --> 01:01:58,274
(GRUNTS)
1346
01:01:59,143 --> 01:02:02,849
(CLICKS)
(ELECTRICAL HUMMING)
1347
01:02:02,850 --> 01:02:04,510
FRANK: Ed, come in.
1348
01:02:04,511 --> 01:02:06,183
Go on, take it and go.
1349
01:02:06,645 --> 01:02:07,920
Uh, Frank,
can you hear me?
1350
01:02:07,921 --> 01:02:11,551
ANNOUNCER 2: Coker lands
a brutal knee to the chest!
1351
01:02:13,795 --> 01:02:14,960
FRANK: I think I see it, Ed.
1352
01:02:14,961 --> 01:02:16,357
(GRUNTS)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
1353
01:02:16,358 --> 01:02:20,262
All right, it looks as though
we’re having
some technical difficulties
1354
01:02:20,263 --> 01:02:21,934
with the New Year’s Eve ball.
1355
01:02:21,935 --> 01:02:24,432
I can’t quite reach.
1356
01:02:25,840 --> 01:02:27,941
Uh.
(CREAKING)
1357
01:02:29,338 --> 01:02:30,746
ANNOUNCER 2: Look at this!
1358
01:02:31,340 --> 01:02:32,571
The pants are off!
1359
01:02:32,572 --> 01:02:33,980
(CROWD LAUGHING)
1360
01:02:35,014 --> 01:02:36,410
What the hell is going on?
1361
01:02:36,411 --> 01:02:38,379
DAN: All right.
I believe the TV networks
1362
01:02:38,380 --> 01:02:39,512
have blurred
what’s happening here.
1363
01:02:39,513 --> 01:02:43,120
So for those of you back home,
I will try to paint a picture.
1364
01:02:43,121 --> 01:02:46,024
The legs themselves
are pale and white,
1365
01:02:46,025 --> 01:02:48,059
sprinkled with
cinnamon soft hair.
1366
01:02:48,060 --> 01:02:50,325
Now turning our gaze
to the middle,
1367
01:02:50,326 --> 01:02:52,899
where we find something
quite magnificent.
1368
01:02:52,900 --> 01:02:54,802
The main event,
if you will.
1369
01:02:54,803 --> 01:02:56,199
A grand bratwurst,
1370
01:02:56,200 --> 01:03:00,203
fit for the Imperial Court
of the Kaiser himself.
1371
01:03:00,204 --> 01:03:02,810
Or maybe a loaf
of unbaked bread
1372
01:03:02,811 --> 01:03:04,207
wearing an afro wig.
1373
01:03:04,208 --> 01:03:06,671
(RATTLES)
(GRUNTS) I got it.
I got it, Ed.
1374
01:03:06,672 --> 01:03:08,916
(OVER SCREEN) Okay,
I’m gonna get out.
1375
01:03:14,218 --> 01:03:16,286
(CROWD LAUGHING)
1376
01:03:16,957 --> 01:03:17,517
Drebin.
1377
01:03:17,518 --> 01:03:20,124
All right, get security
down there now!
1378
01:03:20,125 --> 01:03:21,257
Nothing to see here, folks!
1379
01:03:21,258 --> 01:03:23,259
Police business.
Please, carry on.
1380
01:03:23,260 --> 01:03:25,196
All right, buddy,
time to go.
1381
01:03:25,691 --> 01:03:27,461
FRANK: (ON MIC)
Now listen to me good.
1382
01:03:27,462 --> 01:03:30,871
My name is Frank Drebin.
From Police Squad.
1383
01:03:30,872 --> 01:03:31,971
Drebin!
1384
01:03:31,972 --> 01:03:33,038
FRANK:
This event is now over.
1385
01:03:33,039 --> 01:03:35,667
Everyone vacate
the premises immediately.
1386
01:03:35,668 --> 01:03:36,668
(CROWD BOOING)
Now!
1387
01:03:36,669 --> 01:03:38,406
Okay, playtime’s over.
Give me the mic.
1388
01:03:38,407 --> 01:03:41,575
Don’t take
another step, buddy!
That’s it.
1389
01:03:42,378 --> 01:03:43,279
ANNOUNCER 2: Oh!
1390
01:03:43,280 --> 01:03:45,050
Buffer goes down!
(CHEERING)
1391
01:03:45,051 --> 01:03:48,119
You like watching
a real man kick ass?
1392
01:03:48,120 --> 01:03:50,254
(CHEERING)
1393
01:03:50,749 --> 01:03:51,419
Oh!
1394
01:03:51,420 --> 01:03:54,719
ED: (OVER COMMS) Frank,
get the hell out of there!
You’ve got company!
1395
01:03:54,720 --> 01:03:58,361
All right.
Goodbye, everyone. Uh...
1396
01:03:58,526 --> 01:03:59,967
Have a good night.
1397
01:04:02,068 --> 01:04:04,399
All right, you, you,
come with me.
1398
01:04:04,400 --> 01:04:07,006
Tell everybody to put in
their frequency plugs.
1399
01:04:07,007 --> 01:04:07,666
And her, too.
1400
01:04:07,667 --> 01:04:09,569
We don’t want her
going crazy in here,
do we?
1401
01:04:09,570 --> 01:04:10,702
ED: What do you see, Frank?
1402
01:04:10,703 --> 01:04:12,913
The device
has some lights on it.
1403
01:04:12,914 --> 01:04:15,344
Various holes.
Weighs about...
1404
01:04:15,345 --> 01:04:16,246
two-and-a-half chili dogs.
1405
01:04:16,247 --> 01:04:20,119
It’s got
some sort of timer on it
synced up to midnight.
1406
01:04:20,581 --> 01:04:22,384
CANE: Hello, Detective.
1407
01:04:22,385 --> 01:04:24,925
Easy now.
Let’s have it.
(GUN CLICKS)
1408
01:04:24,926 --> 01:04:25,585
Stop right there.
1409
01:04:25,586 --> 01:04:27,356
Don’t do it.
Make one more move,
1410
01:04:27,357 --> 01:04:31,030
and I’ll blow its freaking
computer brains
all over this floor!
1411
01:04:31,031 --> 01:04:31,965
CANE: Think about it, Drebin.
1412
01:04:31,966 --> 01:04:33,901
Everything I’m doing
is for guys like us.
1413
01:04:33,902 --> 01:04:35,001
Guys like us?
Yes.
1414
01:04:35,002 --> 01:04:38,940
Powerful, righteous men,
who actually give a damn.
1415
01:04:39,105 --> 01:04:39,907
Come on, Frank,
1416
01:04:39,908 --> 01:04:43,636
you said it yourself,
"The world
was better before."
1417
01:04:43,637 --> 01:04:45,639
(CLICKS)
(DEVICE BEEPS)
1418
01:04:47,014 --> 01:04:48,278
What have you done?
1419
01:04:48,279 --> 01:04:49,477
(BEEPS)
(CHUCKLES)
1420
01:04:49,478 --> 01:04:50,346
(PULSES)
1421
01:04:50,347 --> 01:04:52,051
(BANGING)
(MAN SCREAMING)
1422
01:04:52,052 --> 01:04:53,547
(OBJECTS CLATTERING)
1423
01:04:53,548 --> 01:04:55,990
(CROWD SCREAMING)
1424
01:04:56,518 --> 01:04:58,750
(SCREAMING CONTINUES)
(GRUNTING)
1425
01:04:58,751 --> 01:05:00,928
(BLOWS LANDING)
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)
1426
01:05:00,929 --> 01:05:02,457
(GRUNTING)
1427
01:05:02,458 --> 01:05:03,591
(SHOUTS)
1428
01:05:11,973 --> 01:05:13,138
(GROANING)
1429
01:05:13,139 --> 01:05:15,437
(SCREAMING)
Whoa! Ah!
1430
01:05:15,438 --> 01:05:16,405
(SCREAMING)
1431
01:05:16,406 --> 01:05:18,540
(SHOUTING, GRUNTING)
1432
01:05:20,311 --> 01:05:22,279
(SCREAMING)
1433
01:05:22,280 --> 01:05:23,611
Ahh.
1434
01:05:23,919 --> 01:05:25,920
Get out! Shh! Quiet!
1435
01:05:25,921 --> 01:05:29,781
"Four wheels move the body,
two wheels move the soul."
1436
01:05:29,782 --> 01:05:32,751
ALL: All right.
It’s a famous quote
I got from...
1437
01:05:32,752 --> 01:05:33,587
Quotes.com.
1438
01:05:33,588 --> 01:05:35,193
HENCHMAN: Hey, boss!
Yeah.
1439
01:05:35,194 --> 01:05:36,227
What do you want me
to do with her?
1440
01:05:36,228 --> 01:05:38,031
Leave her here.
She’ll be dead by morning.
1441
01:05:38,032 --> 01:05:40,462
(GASPS)
You fellas know
how to ride, right?
1442
01:05:40,463 --> 01:05:41,463
Let’s do it! Yeah!
1443
01:05:41,464 --> 01:05:43,630
(ELECTRICAL HUMMING)
1444
01:05:43,631 --> 01:05:45,973
WOMAN: Hold on.
(TIRES SCREECHING)
1445
01:05:45,974 --> 01:05:47,370
(GROANING)
1446
01:05:47,371 --> 01:05:48,899
(SHOUTS)
(CRASHES)
1447
01:05:48,900 --> 01:05:52,540
WOMAN: Whoa! Whoopsie.
Go, go, go. No!
1448
01:05:52,541 --> 01:05:54,983
(SHOUTING)
1449
01:05:55,984 --> 01:05:57,677
(PEOPLE SCREAMING)
1450
01:05:57,678 --> 01:05:58,744
Look at this!
1451
01:05:58,745 --> 01:06:00,582
(LAUGHS)
(CRASHES)
1452
01:06:06,159 --> 01:06:07,259
(BEEPS)
1453
01:06:08,128 --> 01:06:09,294
(BEEPING)
1454
01:06:10,394 --> 01:06:11,823
(BEEPS)
1455
01:06:11,824 --> 01:06:13,561
(LAUGHS MALICIOUSLY)
1456
01:06:13,562 --> 01:06:15,135
(CROWD SHOUTING)
1457
01:06:23,440 --> 01:06:24,573
Ahh!
1458
01:06:27,411 --> 01:06:29,742
Stay back!
I don’t want to hurt you.
1459
01:06:29,743 --> 01:06:32,779
(SHOUTING)
(FERGALICIOUS
BY FERGIE PLAYING)
1460
01:06:33,516 --> 01:06:34,880
(GROANS)
1461
01:06:37,553 --> 01:06:39,092
(SHOUTS, YELPS)
1462
01:06:39,093 --> 01:06:40,687
(MAGAZINE DROPS, KICKS)
(SCREAMS)
1463
01:06:40,688 --> 01:06:42,360
(WOMAN SCREAMS)
1464
01:06:43,427 --> 01:06:46,495
(SHOUTS, GRUNTS)
1465
01:06:46,496 --> 01:06:48,630
(GROANS, GRUNTS)
(MAGAZINE CLICKS)
1466
01:06:49,235 --> 01:06:52,007
To the bunker, gentlemen!
(EVIL LAUGH)
1467
01:06:52,370 --> 01:06:53,106
(TEETH CRACKING)
1468
01:06:53,107 --> 01:06:54,536
FERGIE:
♪ Hold, hold, hold
Hold, hold up!
1469
01:06:54,537 --> 01:06:56,176
♪ Check it out
1470
01:06:59,674 --> 01:07:01,808
(SQUELCHING)
(GROANS)
1471
01:07:03,150 --> 01:07:04,415
(GROANS, SCREAMS)
1472
01:07:05,218 --> 01:07:06,152
(RHYTHMIC GRUNTING)
1473
01:07:06,153 --> 01:07:08,517
♪ I’m the F to the E-R-G
The I, the E
1474
01:07:08,518 --> 01:07:09,584
Whoa! (GRUNTING)
1475
01:07:09,585 --> 01:07:12,191
♪ And can’t no other lady
Put it down like me
1476
01:07:12,192 --> 01:07:14,094
♪ I’m fergalicious ♪
1477
01:07:14,095 --> 01:07:15,491
(SIGHS)
1478
01:07:15,492 --> 01:07:17,395
(PEOPLE SHOUTING)
1479
01:07:20,464 --> 01:07:22,400
FRANK: Come on.
Come on. Come on.
1480
01:07:26,239 --> 01:07:28,406
(PEOPLE SCREAMING IN DISTANCE)
1481
01:07:32,872 --> 01:07:36,007
(NEW AGE MUSIC PLAYING)
1482
01:07:43,190 --> 01:07:44,058
Daddy?
1483
01:07:44,059 --> 01:07:45,620
(SQUAWKS)
1484
01:07:45,621 --> 01:07:48,591
Help me, Daddy.
What do we do?
1485
01:07:50,626 --> 01:07:52,957
(CANE LAUGHS)
1486
01:07:52,958 --> 01:07:56,830
Come on! Weird Al’s waiting!
(CHUCKLES)
1487
01:07:58,865 --> 01:08:00,107
(OWL SQUAWKS)
1488
01:08:00,108 --> 01:08:03,737
Whoo-hoo!
Just like old times.
1489
01:08:03,738 --> 01:08:05,080
(SQUAWKS)
1490
01:08:05,443 --> 01:08:06,477
Come on!
1491
01:08:09,183 --> 01:08:10,480
Let me get this guy first.
1492
01:08:10,481 --> 01:08:11,812
(GROANS)
1493
01:08:12,450 --> 01:08:15,617
Got him!
Okay, this guy on the right.
1494
01:08:15,618 --> 01:08:16,519
(GRUNTS)
1495
01:08:16,520 --> 01:08:18,653
Ew.
(CAWS)
1496
01:08:18,654 --> 01:08:21,426
Come on, Daddy,
enough playing around.
1497
01:08:21,822 --> 01:08:23,021
Oh, thanks.
1498
01:08:24,055 --> 01:08:26,794
That’s him! A little lower.
1499
01:08:28,862 --> 01:08:29,928
(OWL HOOTS)
1500
01:08:29,929 --> 01:08:31,106
Okay, here.
1501
01:08:31,898 --> 01:08:33,603
You’ve got a clear shot.
1502
01:08:36,672 --> 01:08:37,342
Take it!
1503
01:08:37,343 --> 01:08:39,575
(SCREECHES, FARTS)
Ahh!
1504
01:08:39,576 --> 01:08:42,149
Whoa! That was so much!
1505
01:08:42,150 --> 01:08:44,712
You still got it, Daddy.
(CAWS)
1506
01:08:44,713 --> 01:08:47,011
(GRUNTS)
1507
01:08:47,012 --> 01:08:48,156
(SHOUTING)
1508
01:08:49,190 --> 01:08:50,785
(YELPING)
1509
01:08:53,359 --> 01:08:54,656
Thank you, Daddy!
1510
01:08:54,657 --> 01:08:56,889
(OWL SCREECHING)
1511
01:08:56,890 --> 01:08:59,266
(GROANS)
1512
01:09:00,531 --> 01:09:02,137
(GRUNTS)
1513
01:09:04,139 --> 01:09:06,097
You see
what you’ve done, Cane?
1514
01:09:06,999 --> 01:09:10,474
It’s not too late
to stop this madness!
1515
01:09:10,475 --> 01:09:12,542
This isn’t madness, Drebin.
1516
01:09:12,543 --> 01:09:13,741
This is progress!
1517
01:09:13,742 --> 01:09:14,478
MAN: Progress?
1518
01:09:14,479 --> 01:09:17,613
The needs of the few
should never outweigh
the needs of the many.
1519
01:09:17,614 --> 01:09:19,945
There was a time
when you knew that.
1520
01:09:19,946 --> 01:09:21,386
So it’s come to this.
1521
01:09:21,387 --> 01:09:23,256
The culmination
of our journey.
1522
01:09:23,257 --> 01:09:26,985
All this... this stuff
that’s taken place
1523
01:09:26,986 --> 01:09:28,360
between you and me!
(TOILET FLUSHES)
1524
01:09:28,361 --> 01:09:30,659
This, uh...
Thanks, Dave.
I got it from here.
1525
01:09:30,660 --> 01:09:33,695
I’m so sorry.
I messed up the lines
a little bit.
1526
01:09:33,696 --> 01:09:35,334
No problem.
You did great.
Yeah.
1527
01:09:35,335 --> 01:09:37,028
See you Sunday?
See you Sunday.
1528
01:09:37,029 --> 01:09:38,337
(GRUFFLY) Okay, Cane!
1529
01:09:38,338 --> 01:09:39,404
DAVE: Please, no!
Get off me!
1530
01:09:39,405 --> 01:09:43,133
Stop! I’m not even
in this movie!
1531
01:09:43,134 --> 01:09:43,771
Somebody!
1532
01:09:43,772 --> 01:09:47,104
Anyway, look at us!
Isn’t this beautiful?
1533
01:09:47,105 --> 01:09:48,644
Exactly as nature intended.
1534
01:09:48,645 --> 01:09:52,978
Two great Kodiak bears,
facing one another
1535
01:09:52,979 --> 01:09:55,112
in an epic battle
for dominance.
1536
01:09:55,113 --> 01:09:58,886
If it’s a fight you want...
very well.
1537
01:10:00,690 --> 01:10:04,023
(GROWLS)
(GROWLS)
1538
01:10:09,094 --> 01:10:10,094
(GRUNTS)
1539
01:10:10,095 --> 01:10:11,701
(BLOW LANDS)
(GROANS)
1540
01:10:12,438 --> 01:10:14,901
Oh! Ow!
1541
01:10:14,902 --> 01:10:19,742
You hit my belly!
You hit the soft part
of my belly!
1542
01:10:20,611 --> 01:10:21,248
What the hell?
1543
01:10:21,249 --> 01:10:24,284
Have you ever actually been
in a fight before?
1544
01:10:24,285 --> 01:10:25,648
Uh, yeah! I have.
1545
01:10:25,649 --> 01:10:28,817
Oh, my God.
I think I’m gonna barf.
1546
01:10:29,422 --> 01:10:30,719
Is that normal?
1547
01:10:30,720 --> 01:10:32,853
Do you want to keep fighting?
1548
01:10:32,854 --> 01:10:34,118
What? No!
1549
01:10:34,119 --> 01:10:36,087
My tummy still hurts a lot!
1550
01:10:36,088 --> 01:10:37,297
Well, in that case...
(GROANS)
1551
01:10:37,298 --> 01:10:38,595
...I’m gonna arrest you.
1552
01:10:38,596 --> 01:10:42,192
You can’t arrest me.
You still didn’t catch me.
1553
01:10:42,193 --> 01:10:43,061
There’s nowhere to run!
1554
01:10:43,062 --> 01:10:45,471
I won’t be running.
(METALLIC CLINKING)
1555
01:10:45,966 --> 01:10:47,638
I’ll be flying.
1556
01:10:48,100 --> 01:10:49,442
(WHIRRING)
1557
01:10:49,904 --> 01:10:52,544
(SHOUTS, CACKLES)
1558
01:10:55,745 --> 01:10:57,384
(GROANS)
1559
01:11:05,183 --> 01:11:06,756
Richard Cane...
1560
01:11:08,659 --> 01:11:10,221
(SIGHS SOFTLY)
1561
01:11:10,661 --> 01:11:12,794
...you’re under arrest.
1562
01:11:12,795 --> 01:11:14,763
(CUFFS CLANKING)
1563
01:11:14,764 --> 01:11:16,304
(BIKE BELL DINGS)
1564
01:11:19,538 --> 01:11:21,474
(TRIUMPHANT MUSIC PLAYING)
1565
01:11:26,842 --> 01:11:28,073
(SIGHING GRIMLY)
1566
01:11:28,074 --> 01:11:31,110
He won’t be hurting
anyone anymore.
1567
01:11:31,781 --> 01:11:32,914
It’s over.
1568
01:11:34,520 --> 01:11:36,489
Not for me, it isn’t.
1569
01:11:38,150 --> 01:11:40,360
No. Please.
1570
01:11:40,361 --> 01:11:42,329
Think about this, Beth.
1571
01:11:42,330 --> 01:11:43,924
Killing him
won’t fix anything.
1572
01:11:43,925 --> 01:11:45,860
Why should I let him live?
1573
01:11:45,861 --> 01:11:47,433
It won’t bring Simon back.
1574
01:11:47,434 --> 01:11:49,193
You don’t know that for sure.
1575
01:11:49,194 --> 01:11:51,866
You’re right.
Anything is possible.
1576
01:11:51,867 --> 01:11:55,705
But you have to let
the justice system do its job.
1577
01:11:55,706 --> 01:11:57,839
That’s rich, coming from you.
1578
01:11:57,840 --> 01:11:59,236
The truth is, Beth,
1579
01:11:59,237 --> 01:12:02,514
once you kill
a man for revenge,
there’s no going back.
1580
01:12:02,515 --> 01:12:06,419
It stays with you forever,
following you like a shadow.
1581
01:12:06,420 --> 01:12:09,323
A voice in your head
saying over and over,
1582
01:12:09,324 --> 01:12:12,052
"Man, that was awesome!"
1583
01:12:12,283 --> 01:12:14,427
So, put the gun down.
1584
01:12:14,428 --> 01:12:17,287
If not for me,
then for us.
1585
01:12:17,288 --> 01:12:19,367
For our future together.
1586
01:12:19,730 --> 01:12:20,961
I love you, Beth.
1587
01:12:20,962 --> 01:12:24,404
Don’t throw it all away
for a few seconds of...
1588
01:12:24,405 --> 01:12:27,902
the best feeling
you would ever have
in your life.
1589
01:12:27,903 --> 01:12:29,476
(CRIES)
1590
01:12:38,111 --> 01:12:40,454
(SHOUTING CONTINUES)
1591
01:12:49,023 --> 01:12:50,398
(SIGHS SOFTLY)
1592
01:12:54,600 --> 01:12:55,930
Go ahead.
1593
01:12:55,931 --> 01:12:57,097
Do it.
1594
01:13:01,739 --> 01:13:04,269
(ONE TIME BY ENYA PLAYING)
1595
01:13:07,305 --> 01:13:12,782
♪ Who can say
Where the road goes?
1596
01:13:12,783 --> 01:13:14,949
I love you.
I love you.
1597
01:13:14,950 --> 01:13:16,423
(LAUGHING)
1598
01:13:16,424 --> 01:13:17,985
♪ Only time
1599
01:13:17,986 --> 01:13:19,426
Ronald, wake up!
1600
01:13:19,427 --> 01:13:21,857
(GASPS)
You got the promotion!
1601
01:13:21,858 --> 01:13:22,924
Oh!
1602
01:13:22,925 --> 01:13:24,156
Bring it in. (CHUCKLES)
1603
01:13:24,157 --> 01:13:26,994
♪ As your heart chose?
Only time
1604
01:13:26,995 --> 01:13:29,195
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
1605
01:13:36,202 --> 01:13:38,577
Not bad
for a stubborn old fool.
1606
01:13:38,578 --> 01:13:44,044
I guess old men
really are the toughest,
smartest, most capable,
1607
01:13:44,045 --> 01:13:46,619
sexiest beings on the planet.
1608
01:13:47,048 --> 01:13:47,949
Oh, Frank,
1609
01:13:47,950 --> 01:13:50,656
you’ve made me
a very happy woman.
1610
01:13:51,382 --> 01:13:52,724
Me, too.
1611
01:13:53,318 --> 01:13:55,826
♪ Only time
1612
01:13:56,222 --> 01:14:01,732
♪ And who can say
Why your heart cries
1613
01:14:01,733 --> 01:14:06,066
♪ When your love lies?
Only time ♪
1614
01:14:06,067 --> 01:14:07,870
(OWL CAWING)
1615
01:14:07,871 --> 01:14:09,609
(SONG FADES)
1616
01:14:11,006 --> 01:14:12,337
(CAWS)
1617
01:14:13,745 --> 01:14:16,649
(HEROIC MUSIC PLAYING)
1618
01:14:24,151 --> 01:14:26,823
CHIEF DAVIS: As a result
of Lieutenant Frank Drebin’s
1619
01:14:26,824 --> 01:14:28,792
heroic work
on New Year’s Eve,
1620
01:14:28,793 --> 01:14:31,993
I am happy to announce
that Police Squad is back
1621
01:14:31,994 --> 01:14:37,636
with a renewed commitment
to accountability and justice.
1622
01:14:37,637 --> 01:14:40,430
And in that spirit,
we will not ignore
1623
01:14:40,431 --> 01:14:43,367
Lieutenant Drebin’s
questionable actions
1624
01:14:43,368 --> 01:14:46,304
on the days
leading up to the event.
1625
01:14:46,305 --> 01:14:47,910
And right now, Frank Drebin
1626
01:14:47,911 --> 01:14:54,851
is being subject to a rigorous
and thorough
internal investigation.
1627
01:14:54,852 --> 01:14:55,687
Thank you.
1628
01:14:55,688 --> 01:14:57,018
(OVERLAPPING CHATTER)
1629
01:14:57,019 --> 01:14:59,955
(BABY WANTS TO ROCK
BY MONDO ROCK PLAYING)
1630
01:14:59,956 --> 01:15:01,320
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATION)
1631
01:15:02,563 --> 01:15:03,497
(SHRIEKS)
1632
01:15:03,498 --> 01:15:06,226
SINGER:
♪ Baby wants to rock ♪
1633
01:15:07,997 --> 01:15:08,799
Oh!
1634
01:15:08,800 --> 01:15:10,262
(PLAYING STEEL DRUMS)
1635
01:15:10,263 --> 01:15:12,264
Well, Beth, here’s to us.
1636
01:15:12,265 --> 01:15:13,199
To us.
(GLASS CLINKS)
1637
01:15:13,200 --> 01:15:16,643
(THE NAKED GUN FROM THE FILES
OF THE POLICE SQUAD PLAYING)
1638
01:15:36,663 --> 01:15:39,193
What is happening?
What?
1639
01:15:40,425 --> 01:15:42,031
This is strange.
1640
01:15:42,427 --> 01:15:43,703
Come on.
1641
01:15:45,331 --> 01:15:46,398
Taylor?
1642
01:15:47,168 --> 01:15:48,971
Are you all right?
1643
01:15:48,972 --> 01:15:51,171
BETH: What’s happening, Frank?
I’m scared.
1644
01:15:51,172 --> 01:15:54,747
Okay, honey.
We’ll get to the bottom
of this.
1645
01:15:56,078 --> 01:15:57,045
Oh, God.
1646
01:15:57,046 --> 01:15:59,587
Wake up,
you piece of shit!
1647
01:16:00,379 --> 01:16:02,051
FRANK: Keep it together.
1648
01:16:03,481 --> 01:16:06,418
Wait a second.
What is this?
1649
01:16:06,924 --> 01:16:09,520
Do you hear that music?
Yeah.
1650
01:16:15,735 --> 01:16:18,935
(MUFFLED GURGLING)
1651
01:16:18,936 --> 01:16:21,366
Who the heck
are you people?
1652
01:16:21,367 --> 01:16:24,337
Have you been watching us
this whole time?
1653
01:16:24,975 --> 01:16:27,010
You’ve seen me in shorts?
1654
01:16:27,406 --> 01:16:29,408
Step back, honey, please.
1655
01:16:31,245 --> 01:16:33,147
(GLASS BREAKING)
FRANK: Ow!
1656
01:16:33,148 --> 01:16:35,479
(MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING)
1657
01:16:35,480 --> 01:16:38,758
(SIREN WAILS)
Yo! Cops!
1658
01:16:52,332 --> 01:16:53,806
(PINS RATTLE)
1659
01:16:54,675 --> 01:16:56,302
(SIREN CONTINUES WAILING)
1660
01:16:56,303 --> 01:16:58,107
(BRAKES SQUEAL)
1661
01:17:00,846 --> 01:17:02,144
Whoa!
1662
01:17:03,343 --> 01:17:05,081
(SIREN WAILS)
1663
01:17:17,423 --> 01:17:19,700
(MUSIC CONCLUDES)
1664
01:17:20,459 --> 01:17:23,297
(MY SWEET BETH
BY FRANK DREBIN PLAYING)
1665
01:17:26,168 --> 01:17:30,403
FRANK: This goes out
to a very special lady.
1666
01:17:31,811 --> 01:17:33,340
♪ Beth
1667
01:17:34,308 --> 01:17:38,653
♪ You are
The love of my life
1668
01:17:39,280 --> 01:17:43,581
♪ I want to make you my wife
1669
01:17:44,219 --> 01:17:46,254
♪ Sweet Beth
1670
01:17:48,454 --> 01:17:52,259
♪ You opened my heart up
1671
01:17:52,260 --> 01:17:55,526
♪ To loving again...
1672
01:17:55,527 --> 01:17:56,901
You did that.
1673
01:17:56,902 --> 01:17:58,628
You know what,
I’ve never really been
1674
01:17:58,629 --> 01:18:02,632
in a professional
recording studio before.
1675
01:18:02,633 --> 01:18:03,743
What does this do?
1676
01:18:03,744 --> 01:18:05,338
(DRUMBEAT PLAYS)
FRANK: Oh,
1677
01:18:05,339 --> 01:18:06,636
that... that’s nice.
1678
01:18:06,637 --> 01:18:08,946
That’s got a good sound to it,
huh?
1679
01:18:08,947 --> 01:18:12,643
No, no, no.
I don’t need to touch it.
That’s fine.
1680
01:18:13,083 --> 01:18:14,414
♪ Beth
1681
01:18:14,953 --> 01:18:16,514
♪ Oh
1682
01:18:16,515 --> 01:18:19,649
♪ Top-shelf curves
1683
01:18:19,650 --> 01:18:22,520
♪ And brains to boot
1684
01:18:22,521 --> 01:18:29,561
♪ And boots that would top
my brain’s Top Ten list...
1685
01:18:29,869 --> 01:18:31,100
♪ Aboot boots...
1686
01:18:31,101 --> 01:18:35,633
♪ And the curvy brains
That bought them
1687
01:18:36,370 --> 01:18:38,746
♪ Also breasts
1688
01:18:40,077 --> 01:18:42,475
♪ My sweet Beth
1689
01:18:44,015 --> 01:18:49,547
♪ When I first saw you
In my office
1690
01:18:49,548 --> 01:18:54,861
♪ I kept thinking
About your body
1691
01:18:55,620 --> 01:19:01,395
♪ ’Cause I didn’t yet know
Your mind
1692
01:19:02,330 --> 01:19:04,629
♪ I don’t mind
1693
01:19:09,139 --> 01:19:11,745
♪ My sweet Beth
1694
01:19:11,746 --> 01:19:12,405
(DRUMBEAT PLAYS)
1695
01:19:12,406 --> 01:19:14,781
It is just fun
to play those things.
1696
01:19:14,782 --> 01:19:17,982
Do you mind if I...
I pick up this guitar?
1697
01:19:17,983 --> 01:19:21,183
I always wished
I knew how to do it.
(PLAYING ELECTRIC GUITAR SOLO)
1698
01:19:21,184 --> 01:19:23,548
FRANK: Hey!
1699
01:19:23,549 --> 01:19:25,122
Ah, here we go.
1700
01:19:26,992 --> 01:19:29,290
You know,
it’s surprisingly easy.
1701
01:19:29,291 --> 01:19:32,228
(GUITAR SOLO CONTINUES)
1702
01:19:32,932 --> 01:19:35,934
FRANK: Ow! It kind of
hurts your fingertips.
1703
01:19:35,935 --> 01:19:38,234
No one tells you
about that part.
1704
01:19:39,334 --> 01:19:42,271
♪ My sweet Beth ♪
1705
01:19:42,942 --> 01:19:47,639
Thank you, Beth,
for opening up my heart...
1706
01:19:48,277 --> 01:19:49,376
to love again.
1707
01:19:49,377 --> 01:19:50,917
(PIANO MUSIC SWELLS)
1708
01:19:51,280 --> 01:19:52,049
(DRUMBEAT PLAYING)
1709
01:19:52,050 --> 01:19:55,482
FRANK: I just had
to get one more. (GIGGLES)
1710
01:20:00,025 --> 01:20:03,655
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
1711
01:22:07,581 --> 01:22:11,882
(UPBEAT JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
1712
01:24:38,633 --> 01:24:40,568
ANNOUNCER: Everyone,
put your hands together
1713
01:24:40,569 --> 01:24:44,143
for the world’s last
living entertainer,
1714
01:24:44,144 --> 01:24:46,002
"Weird Al" Yankovic!
1715
01:24:46,003 --> 01:24:48,411
(ACCORDION MUSIC PLAYING)
1716
01:24:48,412 --> 01:24:51,448
How’s everybody doing tonight?
1717
01:24:53,813 --> 01:24:54,946
Hello?
1718
01:24:57,124 --> 01:24:58,554
Anybody here?
1719
01:24:59,093 --> 01:25:00,292
Cane?
1720
01:25:00,787 --> 01:25:02,723
Evil billionaires?
1721
01:25:04,362 --> 01:25:06,056
Crab-hands guy?
1722
01:25:08,267 --> 01:25:10,401
Oh, what the heck?