1 00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:30,089 So as you ladies can see, 2 00:01:30,091 --> 00:01:33,358 by dating a guy like Johnny football over there, 3 00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:38,730 you stand to loose $1,900 a year. 4 00:01:40,800 --> 00:01:45,104 Now I don't know about you, but I don't want to lose $1,900. 5 00:01:45,106 --> 00:01:49,241 And, I know, he seems cool now, but in like six months, 6 00:01:49,243 --> 00:01:52,478 I guarantee you, he's gonna be sucking some guy's dick for money. 7 00:01:53,847 --> 00:01:58,817 I mean, I'm just saying, dating a guy like me, 8 00:01:58,819 --> 00:02:02,721 the potential return on that investment-- 9 00:02:02,723 --> 00:02:04,323 strong. 10 00:02:07,594 --> 00:02:07,593 Wow. 11 00:02:10,663 --> 00:02:13,665 I'm just-- I'm just gonna go grab a drink or something. 12 00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:52,671 Oh, my god, Mrs. Hanks. 13 00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:53,839 You tease. 14 00:02:57,177 --> 00:03:00,879 Ajay, operation Johnson county underway. 15 00:03:00,881 --> 00:03:04,583 I repeat, operation Johnson county underway. 16 00:03:04,585 --> 00:03:07,920 Do you read me? 17 00:03:11,224 --> 00:03:13,492 What do you-- ajay? 18 00:03:18,431 --> 00:03:20,899 That looks like the worst Christmas ever. 19 00:03:20,901 --> 00:03:22,568 Is that what you people do in India? 20 00:03:22,570 --> 00:03:24,603 Dude, I was adopted. 21 00:03:24,605 --> 00:03:25,938 By the way, I've been meaning to ask you, 22 00:03:25,940 --> 00:03:27,773 how fucking old are you? 23 00:03:27,775 --> 00:03:29,474 Hey, team, listen up. 24 00:03:29,476 --> 00:03:31,977 Now given the configuration of these numbers there 25 00:03:31,979 --> 00:03:35,814 theoretically, how long would it take to hold your breath 26 00:03:35,816 --> 00:03:37,583 at the bottom of a ball pit? 27 00:03:37,585 --> 00:03:39,885 What do you mean, like Chucky Cheese? 28 00:03:39,887 --> 00:03:45,257 That place is for babies, what are you doing there? 29 00:03:45,259 --> 00:03:47,292 Uh, sweet bleeding Jesus, i ask myself that 30 00:03:47,294 --> 00:03:50,295 every single day, but that's another question. Other issues. 31 00:03:50,297 --> 00:03:52,864 Anyway, I want to let you know about something called, "summer." 32 00:03:52,866 --> 00:03:55,901 And I know you all want to get the hell out of here, i can see it in your eyes. 33 00:03:55,903 --> 00:03:58,704 But summer stands for tanning and building up your body. 34 00:03:58,706 --> 00:04:00,639 This is something that I know something about. 35 00:04:00,641 --> 00:04:01,640 It takes discipline. 36 00:04:01,642 --> 00:04:04,309 So please, send me pictures. 37 00:04:04,311 --> 00:04:06,545 Lots and lots and lots of pictures. 38 00:04:06,547 --> 00:04:08,447 I need to monitor and track your progress. 39 00:04:08,449 --> 00:04:10,682 I'm sure you all understand. 40 00:04:10,684 --> 00:04:12,651 And I'll give you an example. 41 00:04:12,653 --> 00:04:17,756 Last summer I helped Johnny here, 42 00:04:17,758 --> 00:04:18,991 very nice, 43 00:04:18,993 --> 00:04:21,293 gain 15 lean pounds. 44 00:04:21,295 --> 00:04:26,331 Johnny was 16 last year. Pretty sure that's creepy. 45 00:04:26,333 --> 00:04:27,766 And illegal. 46 00:04:27,768 --> 00:04:29,968 All right, soldier, you stow that right now. 47 00:04:29,970 --> 00:04:31,536 That was last year, okay? 48 00:04:31,538 --> 00:04:33,272 Now since that time i bought a delorean, 49 00:04:33,274 --> 00:04:35,474 and at 88 miles per hour i can drive your ass 50 00:04:35,476 --> 00:04:39,845 to your 18th birthday, is that clear? 51 00:04:39,847 --> 00:04:42,281 Yes. 52 00:04:42,283 --> 00:04:43,615 Uh, can I use the bathroom? 53 00:04:43,617 --> 00:04:46,518 You may, but be careful of those hidden cameras. 54 00:04:46,520 --> 00:04:48,453 -What? -Never mind. 55 00:04:48,455 --> 00:04:49,888 Go out. You have no sense of humor. 56 00:04:49,890 --> 00:04:51,657 You children, what is happening with you today? 57 00:04:53,693 --> 00:04:55,727 What the hell were you doing? I told you to use the walkie. 58 00:04:55,729 --> 00:04:57,596 Oh, yeah, I think it was off or something, I don't know. 59 00:04:57,598 --> 00:05:00,832 Were you in there doing one of your gay drawings again? 60 00:05:00,834 --> 00:05:05,370 Danny, I'm just nervous about this whole situation, man. 61 00:05:05,372 --> 00:05:07,039 All right, are you in the game or not? 62 00:05:08,775 --> 00:05:10,976 Yeah, fuck it. Why not? I'm in. 63 00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:13,779 All right. This is gonna be epic. 64 00:05:13,781 --> 00:05:15,781 Since it is the end of the year 65 00:05:15,783 --> 00:05:17,883 I want to give you a little bit of magic from our friend Galileo. 66 00:05:17,885 --> 00:05:20,485 He said that age is but a number 67 00:05:20,487 --> 00:05:21,953 and numbers can be manipulated. 68 00:05:25,525 --> 00:05:28,093 Everyone exit, please, in a orderly fashion. 69 00:06:02,729 --> 00:06:04,029 Stop! 70 00:06:09,869 --> 00:06:12,671 I might butt fuck you 71 00:06:12,673 --> 00:06:13,972 with discipline. 72 00:06:18,077 --> 00:06:19,911 Listen guys, I know it's the last day and all, 73 00:06:19,913 --> 00:06:21,646 but you really did it this time. 74 00:06:21,648 --> 00:06:25,417 Imagine all the work you made for our poor janitor. 75 00:06:25,419 --> 00:06:28,086 Look, honestly, I'm not even that mad. 76 00:06:29,722 --> 00:06:31,056 But what about all the dildos? 77 00:06:31,058 --> 00:06:32,724 I'll take those home with me. 78 00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,092 We have a family reunion coming up, 79 00:06:34,094 --> 00:06:37,429 so do I have to fill out tax forms or anything? 80 00:06:37,431 --> 00:06:39,131 Seriously, cut the shit, both of you. 81 00:06:43,102 --> 00:06:45,504 -Good morning. -Good morning. 82 00:06:46,606 --> 00:06:48,507 You called the cops on us? 83 00:06:48,509 --> 00:06:51,109 Look, you're gonna find out anyway, 84 00:06:51,111 --> 00:06:54,045 but Chrissy Morgan was kidnapped 85 00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:55,847 on her way to school this morning. 86 00:06:55,849 --> 00:06:57,849 There's been others. 87 00:06:57,851 --> 00:07:00,419 Damn, how many girls are missing? 88 00:07:00,421 --> 00:07:03,021 Chrissy is the third. 89 00:07:03,023 --> 00:07:04,923 Hey, I like you guys, and if it was up to me 90 00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:07,058 I'd look the other way, but unfortunately, it's not. 91 00:07:07,060 --> 00:07:08,693 It's up to-- him. 92 00:07:10,196 --> 00:07:12,864 Let's go. Time to see the big man. 93 00:07:14,834 --> 00:07:16,601 I'll save you some dildos. 94 00:07:22,175 --> 00:07:25,143 Dick puppets. 95 00:07:25,145 --> 00:07:27,779 Dick puppets hanging from the ceiling? 96 00:07:27,781 --> 00:07:29,781 Are you serious? 97 00:07:29,783 --> 00:07:32,451 What in the hell were you thinking? 98 00:07:32,453 --> 00:07:34,553 Welcome to Johnson county, sir. 99 00:07:34,555 --> 00:07:35,954 Johnson county? 100 00:07:35,956 --> 00:07:37,722 I'm gonna take that as a thinly veiled 101 00:07:37,724 --> 00:07:39,624 reference to a cock. 102 00:07:39,626 --> 00:07:42,761 A pee pee. A dick. 103 00:07:42,763 --> 00:07:44,963 A Peter. 104 00:07:44,965 --> 00:07:46,898 A cornhole impaler. 105 00:07:46,900 --> 00:07:50,235 A cervix crusher. 106 00:07:50,237 --> 00:07:55,907 One hundred percent all meat thermometer. 107 00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,814 Hoo hoo dilly. 108 00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:04,783 I gotta know which one of you guys came up with this idea. 109 00:08:04,785 --> 00:08:06,117 Listen, I'm gonna tell you something, 110 00:08:06,119 --> 00:08:07,819 this thing went down a little girls throat today. 111 00:08:07,821 --> 00:08:10,155 Do you understand me? It went deep. 112 00:08:10,157 --> 00:08:11,890 Deep. Deep. 113 00:08:11,892 --> 00:08:13,558 Deep into her throat. 114 00:08:15,595 --> 00:08:17,829 Would you like me to demonstrate... 115 00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:22,601 This tonsil tickler going down that little girl's throat? 116 00:08:22,603 --> 00:08:24,236 Not if you're doing the re-enactment, 117 00:08:24,238 --> 00:08:26,605 but I wouldn't mind seeing her swallow. 118 00:08:26,607 --> 00:08:29,574 That's real funny. 119 00:08:29,576 --> 00:08:32,611 I am here working my ass off 120 00:08:32,613 --> 00:08:36,648 trying to form these little girls, these little boys... 121 00:08:38,885 --> 00:08:42,554 Into the future citizens of the United States of America. 122 00:08:42,556 --> 00:08:44,055 God bless the U.S.A. 123 00:08:45,858 --> 00:08:48,894 I gotta figure out something. One of you guys did this. 124 00:08:48,896 --> 00:08:50,829 One of you-- it was your idea. Was it you, white boy? 125 00:08:50,831 --> 00:08:52,297 Little Caucasian boy? Was it you? 126 00:08:52,299 --> 00:08:55,033 Was it you Indian boy? 127 00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:56,535 Fucking Indians. 128 00:08:56,537 --> 00:08:58,069 Sir, he's not that kind of Indian. 129 00:08:58,071 --> 00:08:59,804 -What? -Sir, he's not-- 130 00:08:59,806 --> 00:09:01,940 -he's not that kind of Indian. -He's not? 131 00:09:04,143 --> 00:09:05,677 I apologize. 132 00:09:05,679 --> 00:09:09,281 I-- i-- I, habeeb, i absolutely apologize 133 00:09:09,283 --> 00:09:10,615 from the depth of my heart. 134 00:09:10,617 --> 00:09:12,050 I did not mean to offend you. 135 00:09:12,052 --> 00:09:13,585 You're not that kind of an Indian. 136 00:09:13,587 --> 00:09:14,786 It's all right. I understand. 137 00:09:16,856 --> 00:09:18,890 You are the kind of Indian that talk like this. 138 00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:22,160 You are the kind of Indian when I need my computer fix. 139 00:09:22,162 --> 00:09:25,697 They route me over to the dot heads over there in India. 140 00:09:25,699 --> 00:09:27,933 If they can pull themselves away from the cobras 141 00:09:27,935 --> 00:09:29,801 in the wicker baskets 142 00:09:29,803 --> 00:09:31,069 playing a skin flute. 143 00:09:31,071 --> 00:09:33,104 Drives those damn snakes crazy. 144 00:09:35,274 --> 00:09:37,642 So while you are traversing the universe 145 00:09:37,644 --> 00:09:42,047 on a magic carpet ride, your people are raising 146 00:09:42,049 --> 00:09:44,249 world oil prices everywhere. 147 00:09:44,251 --> 00:09:45,951 You know, I bought gasoline yesterday. 148 00:09:45,953 --> 00:09:47,619 Five dollars a gallon. 149 00:09:47,621 --> 00:09:51,823 He does get crazy sometimes, sir, I mean, just, here, 150 00:09:51,825 --> 00:09:54,092 just look at this. 151 00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:55,827 Danny, what the fuck, man? 152 00:09:57,296 --> 00:10:01,900 Good god, young man. There is a cultural gap here 153 00:10:01,902 --> 00:10:05,370 that definitely needs to be filled. 154 00:10:07,940 --> 00:10:10,742 I agree completely, sir, but to be fair, 155 00:10:10,744 --> 00:10:13,378 his village was destroyed by an elephant stampede. 156 00:10:13,380 --> 00:10:14,379 -Hmm? -What? 157 00:10:14,381 --> 00:10:15,714 No. 158 00:10:17,883 --> 00:10:19,918 The bad news is you boys are failing 159 00:10:19,920 --> 00:10:22,020 your classes for this semester. 160 00:10:23,923 --> 00:10:24,956 Then we can't graduate. 161 00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:27,392 No fucking shit. 162 00:10:27,394 --> 00:10:30,729 -So... -What's more, I'm gonna make you pay back the school 163 00:10:30,731 --> 00:10:32,998 for the damages that you've done. 164 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:36,968 So basically, what you're saying, is that we're fucked. 165 00:10:38,738 --> 00:10:40,639 Let me process what you just said. 166 00:10:40,641 --> 00:10:43,074 Basically, what you're saying, 167 00:10:43,076 --> 00:10:45,010 is we're fucked, yes. 168 00:10:45,012 --> 00:10:47,412 -Excuse me, sir. -What? 169 00:10:47,414 --> 00:10:50,382 -I just had an interesting idea. -What's that? 170 00:10:50,384 --> 00:10:53,985 Remember that little thing we discussed? 171 00:10:55,121 --> 00:10:57,656 Oh, yeah. 172 00:10:57,658 --> 00:10:59,190 -Yeah, yeah. -Yeah. 173 00:10:59,192 --> 00:11:01,126 -Uh-huh, I remember that, yeah. -Uh-huh? 174 00:11:01,128 --> 00:11:04,195 This may be a very opportune time to give it a test run. 175 00:11:05,131 --> 00:11:07,032 I think you're right. 176 00:11:07,034 --> 00:11:09,134 Yeah, I like that. 177 00:11:15,041 --> 00:11:16,908 A test run. 178 00:11:16,910 --> 00:11:19,144 Opportune. 179 00:11:19,146 --> 00:11:22,814 I like opportune test runs. 180 00:11:22,816 --> 00:11:26,084 I'm gonna give them back to you when I'm done. 181 00:11:26,086 --> 00:11:29,754 Thank you, vice principal chok-- chug 182 00:11:29,756 --> 00:11:30,989 chokachi. 183 00:11:32,191 --> 00:11:35,960 You got it. 184 00:11:35,962 --> 00:11:37,462 Boys... 185 00:11:41,734 --> 00:11:45,336 I'm very lonely. 186 00:11:45,338 --> 00:11:48,206 The walls are talking to me. 187 00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:50,442 What do they say? 188 00:11:50,444 --> 00:11:53,745 Mostly about my mother's infidelities. 189 00:11:53,747 --> 00:11:56,214 She had no idea. Bless her heart. 190 00:11:58,184 --> 00:12:00,819 She thought black men tasted like chocolate. 191 00:12:04,123 --> 00:12:05,857 One day she comes home with a little something-- 192 00:12:05,859 --> 00:12:08,359 something coming out of the corners of her mouth. 193 00:12:08,361 --> 00:12:11,229 I said, "mamma, what is that something something 194 00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:12,964 coming out of the corners of your mouth?" 195 00:12:12,966 --> 00:12:15,033 And she said I just ate a fudgesicle. 196 00:12:15,035 --> 00:12:16,501 She could not stay away from the 197 00:12:16,503 --> 00:12:18,903 black anaconda snake. 198 00:12:23,809 --> 00:12:25,243 I should have known. 199 00:12:25,245 --> 00:12:26,911 When she'd tuck me in bed at night, 200 00:12:26,913 --> 00:12:28,480 she'd kiss me on the cheek. 201 00:12:32,218 --> 00:12:34,285 And she'd grab my hoo-hoo. 202 00:12:40,126 --> 00:12:46,131 And she'd whisper to me, she'd go, "good night, Russell, 203 00:12:46,133 --> 00:12:48,767 my love muscle." 204 00:12:48,769 --> 00:12:53,538 Okay, well, we gotta go home and do that thing 205 00:12:53,540 --> 00:12:55,840 where we tell our parents what we did. 206 00:12:55,842 --> 00:12:57,942 Yeah, I don't wanna go unpunished for this. 207 00:12:57,944 --> 00:13:00,979 I'm already getting the urge to do marijuana. 208 00:13:00,981 --> 00:13:04,315 Mmm, I see. All right, okay. 209 00:13:04,317 --> 00:13:07,285 Yeah, you guys better run 'cause your lives are in danger. 210 00:13:10,189 --> 00:13:12,957 Yeah, no, no I love what you did last night. 211 00:13:12,959 --> 00:13:15,326 Yeah, I'll be there at 6:00. Yeah, wear that dress again. 212 00:13:15,328 --> 00:13:18,863 Oh, I'll call you back. Hey, boys! Hold up! 213 00:13:18,865 --> 00:13:22,500 Listen, we have an experimental mentorship program. 214 00:13:22,502 --> 00:13:25,904 We pair you with a mentor and you work all summer. 215 00:13:25,906 --> 00:13:29,073 That's it. And you still graduate. 216 00:13:29,075 --> 00:13:31,176 Wow, sick. 217 00:13:31,178 --> 00:13:33,144 You in? 218 00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:34,412 -Yeah, it sounds great. -Awesome. 219 00:13:34,414 --> 00:13:36,214 I'll call your mom later to fill her in. 220 00:13:36,216 --> 00:13:39,250 And boys, please don't screw up when you're using the guy data. 221 00:13:39,252 --> 00:13:41,152 What did you do? 222 00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:43,021 I had some interesting experiences 223 00:13:43,023 --> 00:13:45,290 on a certain famous TV show with Carmen electra 224 00:13:45,292 --> 00:13:46,558 and Pamela Anderson. 225 00:13:49,061 --> 00:13:51,963 It was some crazy shit. 226 00:13:51,965 --> 00:13:53,364 Come on! Get out of here! Get out of here! 227 00:13:53,366 --> 00:13:54,966 Fist pump it. Boom, blow it up. 228 00:13:54,968 --> 00:13:56,167 Boom! 229 00:13:58,370 --> 00:14:00,271 Are you there? 230 00:14:00,273 --> 00:14:01,940 Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I'm good. 231 00:14:06,545 --> 00:14:09,447 I am old money. 232 00:14:10,617 --> 00:14:12,083 I am old money. 233 00:14:12,085 --> 00:14:14,586 - I own many horses. -I own many horses. 234 00:14:14,588 --> 00:14:16,154 The cobbler will know my name 235 00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:18,456 -and he will look me in the-- -the cobbler 236 00:14:18,458 --> 00:14:21,125 - will know my name. - -When he repairs my shoes. 237 00:14:21,127 --> 00:14:23,161 They will look me in the eyes 238 00:14:23,163 --> 00:14:25,330 when he repairs my shoes. 239 00:14:25,332 --> 00:14:27,866 The cobbler will know my name, and he will look me in the eyes. 240 00:14:27,868 --> 00:14:32,036 - The cobbler. - When he repairs my shoes. 241 00:14:32,038 --> 00:14:34,472 Look me in the eyes. 242 00:14:34,474 --> 00:14:38,610 When he repairs my shoes. 243 00:14:38,612 --> 00:14:40,311 I'm old money. 244 00:14:48,387 --> 00:14:52,123 I think-- I think i might love you. 245 00:14:55,628 --> 00:14:57,362 Ajay, let's go. 246 00:14:57,364 --> 00:15:00,265 Oh, fuck, man! 247 00:15:00,267 --> 00:15:02,500 I was about to score in my dream and you ruined it. 248 00:15:02,502 --> 00:15:04,435 What did she look like? 249 00:15:04,437 --> 00:15:07,572 Let me guess, you're the kinda guy that likes small tits. 250 00:15:07,574 --> 00:15:10,241 Uh, I don't know. 251 00:15:10,243 --> 00:15:11,576 What do you mean you don't know? 252 00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:13,378 Danny! Ajay! 253 00:15:13,380 --> 00:15:15,480 Uh, boys, downstairs, now! 254 00:15:37,569 --> 00:15:40,538 In your face, thieves! 255 00:15:53,185 --> 00:15:56,688 What the hell were you two thinking? 256 00:15:56,690 --> 00:15:58,957 None of my dildos better be missing, 257 00:15:58,959 --> 00:16:00,425 I'll tell you that much. 258 00:16:00,427 --> 00:16:04,162 Oh, well, honey, I checked, ours are still here. 259 00:16:04,164 --> 00:16:06,297 Well, that's one good piece of news. 260 00:16:07,499 --> 00:16:09,267 I always knew you'd be a loser. 261 00:16:11,003 --> 00:16:13,037 Why is Ross here? 262 00:16:13,039 --> 00:16:15,006 Shouldn't you be serving diarrhea at captain fish? 263 00:16:15,008 --> 00:16:16,975 I'm the second shift assistant manager. 264 00:16:16,977 --> 00:16:19,110 I don't serve, but you got served 265 00:16:19,112 --> 00:16:22,413 when I tackled your ass in the driveway before, bitch. 266 00:16:22,415 --> 00:16:25,216 You got me from behind and I wasn't even looking. 267 00:16:25,218 --> 00:16:29,153 Hmm! That's not the only thing you get from behind now, is it? 268 00:16:29,155 --> 00:16:30,989 What the fuck are you talking about? 269 00:16:30,991 --> 00:16:32,490 Ross is here to help us figure out 270 00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:34,425 what to do with you two. 271 00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:37,695 That's right, Danny. Me, you, living room, now! 272 00:16:37,697 --> 00:16:39,397 Let's go. Get up. 273 00:16:42,334 --> 00:16:46,204 See, ajay? That's what a brother's supposed to do. 274 00:16:46,206 --> 00:16:49,107 All right, you little fucker, anybody know? 275 00:16:49,109 --> 00:16:50,475 Nobody knows. 276 00:16:50,477 --> 00:16:52,210 What about your turban-wearing brother, ajay? 277 00:16:52,212 --> 00:16:54,379 What does he know? 278 00:16:54,381 --> 00:16:57,215 If mom or dad find out i let you dig out all those dildos from the dumpster 279 00:16:57,217 --> 00:16:58,483 behind the gloryhole porn shop, 280 00:16:58,485 --> 00:17:00,451 not only are you a fucking dead man, 281 00:17:00,453 --> 00:17:01,786 but you can kiss all those captain fishes 282 00:17:01,788 --> 00:17:03,654 free COD sandwiches good-bye. 283 00:17:03,656 --> 00:17:05,556 You can't take away my COD sandwiches. 284 00:17:05,558 --> 00:17:07,058 I'm not even rich yet. 285 00:17:07,060 --> 00:17:08,626 I'm living COD platter to COD platter. 286 00:17:08,628 --> 00:17:11,162 It really warms the heart to see how much Ross loves Danny. 287 00:17:11,164 --> 00:17:15,099 Yup, that's what I call brotherly love. 288 00:17:15,101 --> 00:17:17,602 Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. 289 00:17:17,604 --> 00:17:20,505 Teach a man to fish, feed him for a lifetime. 290 00:17:20,507 --> 00:17:22,040 You don't even catch fish. 291 00:17:22,042 --> 00:17:24,208 Unless you count fishing through the freezer. 292 00:17:24,210 --> 00:17:25,777 There are no free lunches. 293 00:17:25,779 --> 00:17:28,246 You should know that already, Mr. business man. 294 00:17:28,248 --> 00:17:30,515 Now hug me. They're watching. Hug me right now. 295 00:17:33,285 --> 00:17:36,821 Ajay, where did you get all those dildos? 296 00:17:36,823 --> 00:17:42,126 Oh, um, a friend-- a girl. A girl. 297 00:17:42,128 --> 00:17:44,562 Well, you know, Danny is always talking about penny stocks 298 00:17:44,564 --> 00:17:46,230 maybe he sold off a few to buy them. 299 00:17:46,232 --> 00:17:48,433 Amazing. He's our little entrepreneur. 300 00:17:50,702 --> 00:17:52,537 Those two really love each other. 301 00:17:52,539 --> 00:17:54,072 Yeah, two future power players 302 00:17:54,074 --> 00:17:55,640 in the midst of a sibling love embrace. 303 00:17:55,642 --> 00:17:57,408 When I get rich, 304 00:17:57,410 --> 00:18:00,611 I'm gonna buy all the captain fishes in the world 305 00:18:00,613 --> 00:18:02,547 and fucking fire you. 306 00:18:02,549 --> 00:18:04,816 Now that just sounds fiscally irresponsible. 307 00:18:04,818 --> 00:18:08,252 Besides, you don't have the skill or the capital 308 00:18:08,254 --> 00:18:10,121 to ever make that happen. 309 00:18:10,123 --> 00:18:15,093 You're a stupid little virgin and that's all you'll ever be. 310 00:18:17,629 --> 00:18:19,764 Looks like you two had a great talk. 311 00:18:19,766 --> 00:18:23,201 I hope you learned something. 312 00:18:23,203 --> 00:18:24,469 I did, mom. 313 00:18:24,471 --> 00:18:26,771 Very good. Very good. 314 00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:28,473 Don't worry, mom. Don't worry, dad. 315 00:18:28,475 --> 00:18:29,674 I straightened him out. 316 00:18:29,676 --> 00:18:31,442 He's gonna be a good little boy, 317 00:18:31,444 --> 00:18:33,111 aren't you, Danny? 318 00:18:36,615 --> 00:18:38,716 God damn it! 319 00:18:38,718 --> 00:18:41,319 There's an overturned shrimp truck on the highway. 320 00:18:41,321 --> 00:18:43,187 - I gotta jet. - -Thanks, Ross. 321 00:18:43,189 --> 00:18:45,456 You're a good man. You're a good man. 322 00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:46,724 Love you. Bye. 323 00:18:50,262 --> 00:18:53,264 Vice principal Cho-- ch-- 324 00:18:53,266 --> 00:18:54,765 chokachi. 325 00:18:54,767 --> 00:18:57,268 Tells me you two have been assigned a mentor. 326 00:18:57,270 --> 00:18:58,736 Can mentor these nuts. 327 00:18:58,738 --> 00:19:02,306 Maybe those nuts need to be mentored, young man. 328 00:19:02,308 --> 00:19:03,908 I wrote down the address. 329 00:19:03,910 --> 00:19:06,911 It's close by. Some place called, "fatty's." 330 00:19:06,913 --> 00:19:10,648 Your mentor's name is Mr. Tyler lavey. 331 00:19:10,650 --> 00:19:14,719 This is one fucking hell of a salad, honey. 332 00:19:14,721 --> 00:19:16,654 -Thanks, honey. -It's fucking great. 333 00:19:16,656 --> 00:19:18,322 You guys fucking think it's fucking great? 334 00:19:18,324 --> 00:19:19,690 This is fucking great. 335 00:19:41,513 --> 00:19:43,481 Yeah? 336 00:19:43,483 --> 00:19:46,417 Hi, we're looking for Tyler lavrey. 337 00:19:46,419 --> 00:19:48,719 Lavrey? Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. 338 00:19:48,721 --> 00:19:51,289 No, no, lavey. Lavey. 339 00:19:51,291 --> 00:19:53,357 Lavey. Lavey. Yeah, lavey. 340 00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:54,625 -Yeah, get in here. -Sorry, yeah. 341 00:19:54,627 --> 00:19:56,360 You guys fucking meet muppet babies? 342 00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:57,795 Give me that. 343 00:20:03,502 --> 00:20:05,603 Oh! Gotta feed the meter. 344 00:20:08,975 --> 00:20:10,808 Dude, what the fuck? 345 00:20:12,312 --> 00:20:13,778 Balderdash! Let's go. 346 00:20:15,314 --> 00:20:16,847 Was that cocaine? 347 00:20:16,849 --> 00:20:18,616 Dude, it smells weird in here. 348 00:20:20,886 --> 00:20:22,386 They're here for you. 349 00:20:28,493 --> 00:20:32,430 Sit the fuck down. 350 00:20:32,432 --> 00:20:34,932 Listen, I thought this would be a cool thing, 351 00:20:34,934 --> 00:20:37,001 this high school mentorship program. 352 00:20:37,003 --> 00:20:39,437 You know, a good PR move for my club, 353 00:20:39,439 --> 00:20:41,672 but I don't wanna hang out with you two losers. 354 00:20:41,674 --> 00:20:44,842 Look, sir, my name is ajay. This is my brother, Dan-- 355 00:20:44,844 --> 00:20:47,011 I don't care who you are. You know what? 356 00:20:47,013 --> 00:20:49,447 I'm gonna call vice principal chokachi 357 00:20:49,449 --> 00:20:50,848 and tell him I'm not cool with this whole thing. 358 00:20:50,850 --> 00:20:52,717 Look, wait-- 359 00:20:52,719 --> 00:20:55,920 look, I'm a strong guy, you're obviously a strong guy-- 360 00:20:55,922 --> 00:20:58,756 are you hitting on me you little squirt? 361 00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:01,259 All I'm saying is that we can help you around the bar 362 00:21:01,261 --> 00:21:02,793 and get stuff done. 363 00:21:02,795 --> 00:21:06,397 Hmm, you wanna do some stuff around the bar. 364 00:21:06,399 --> 00:21:07,798 I don't think so. 365 00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:10,268 My bar is a certain clientele. 366 00:21:10,270 --> 00:21:12,870 Very exceptional people come in here. 367 00:21:12,872 --> 00:21:15,940 I don't want them to see me with you two losers. 368 00:21:15,942 --> 00:21:17,675 Wait. 369 00:21:17,677 --> 00:21:22,046 Look, Tyler, Mr. lavey, if you don't let us do this, 370 00:21:22,048 --> 00:21:24,515 principal Hanks is gonna have us by the balls. 371 00:21:24,517 --> 00:21:26,350 That man keeps vaseline 372 00:21:26,352 --> 00:21:28,653 and anal beads in his front desk. 373 00:21:28,655 --> 00:21:32,390 He will do unspeakable things to our balls and rectum. 374 00:21:32,392 --> 00:21:34,392 That's fucking gross. 375 00:21:34,394 --> 00:21:37,595 You know what, i guess I get it. 376 00:21:37,597 --> 00:21:39,597 I'm gonna put together a little mission list. 377 00:21:39,599 --> 00:21:42,366 Things you have to do. 378 00:21:42,368 --> 00:21:45,636 Complete the list, and I'll keep you guys around. 379 00:21:47,940 --> 00:21:49,573 -Oh! Oh! -Mr. lavey, are you okay? 380 00:21:49,575 --> 00:21:53,010 God. 381 00:21:53,012 --> 00:21:56,447 Yeah, sometimes you have to feed the seed to the birdies. 382 00:21:56,449 --> 00:21:58,916 Thank you. 383 00:21:58,918 --> 00:22:00,951 I'm really fucking busy, as you guys can tell. 384 00:22:00,953 --> 00:22:03,421 So here's what I'm gonna do. 385 00:22:03,423 --> 00:22:05,589 I'm gonna text the two of you guys tomorrow 386 00:22:05,591 --> 00:22:08,059 with the first mission, 387 00:22:08,061 --> 00:22:10,528 and it's gonna be a fucking adventure, boys. 388 00:22:10,530 --> 00:22:11,962 So be ready. 389 00:22:26,845 --> 00:22:30,548 Uh, we're supposed to help clean up the halls? 390 00:22:30,550 --> 00:22:33,017 Enter, if you dare. 391 00:22:35,921 --> 00:22:38,089 Ladies, pull up a toilet. 392 00:22:38,091 --> 00:22:39,724 Or just sit. 393 00:22:39,726 --> 00:22:44,662 We're to clean up the uh-- dildo dick situation 394 00:22:44,664 --> 00:22:48,065 you got going on there. 395 00:22:48,067 --> 00:22:50,868 Let me just ask-- who flooded my halls 396 00:22:50,870 --> 00:22:53,637 with rubber penises? 397 00:22:53,639 --> 00:22:55,005 That was me. 398 00:22:55,007 --> 00:22:57,408 -In all my years of working-- -look, sir-- 399 00:22:57,410 --> 00:22:58,809 -in this shit hole-- -we're really sorry. 400 00:22:58,811 --> 00:23:02,012 I laughed my ass off. That was pretty amazing. 401 00:23:02,014 --> 00:23:04,682 1500 rubber penises in the hallway. 402 00:23:04,684 --> 00:23:08,786 I mean, I've cleaned up like 100, but 1500, 403 00:23:08,788 --> 00:23:12,390 that was like, it was like a party at Elton John's house. 404 00:23:12,392 --> 00:23:14,425 Oh, my god. Wow. 405 00:23:18,597 --> 00:23:22,700 Anyway... do you want to play on z whistle? 406 00:23:22,702 --> 00:23:24,969 Yes, the magic whistle. 407 00:23:24,971 --> 00:23:27,638 Play as a whistle. 408 00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:28,839 Very nice. 409 00:23:29,841 --> 00:23:31,442 Very nice. 410 00:23:34,514 --> 00:23:36,947 Holy shit, man. 411 00:23:36,949 --> 00:23:38,983 --Whatever happened to us-- 412 00:23:38,985 --> 00:23:41,185 whatever happened to us cleaning up the halls? 413 00:23:41,187 --> 00:23:45,055 Oh, bros, i took care of it, man. 414 00:23:45,057 --> 00:23:47,691 All right? Life is tough. 415 00:23:47,693 --> 00:23:49,093 I didn't want you guys to get fucked over. 416 00:23:49,095 --> 00:23:50,694 I mean, look at me. I'm a janitor. 417 00:23:50,696 --> 00:23:54,765 I'm smoking weed on a toilet. 418 00:23:54,767 --> 00:23:57,868 I mean, I'm 19 years old. 419 00:23:57,870 --> 00:24:01,038 Look at how hard life is. 420 00:24:01,040 --> 00:24:05,509 I know it's funny to you, but it's tough, man. 421 00:24:05,511 --> 00:24:07,878 So, consider me your life guru, all right? 422 00:24:07,880 --> 00:24:10,114 And the purveyor of the best whistle weed 423 00:24:10,116 --> 00:24:12,116 in this awesome land. 424 00:24:12,118 --> 00:24:13,818 Sweet. I'm Danny. 425 00:24:13,820 --> 00:24:16,020 -Ajay. -Was up? 426 00:24:16,022 --> 00:24:17,655 Whatever. 427 00:24:17,657 --> 00:24:19,089 I'm wacon. 428 00:24:19,091 --> 00:24:22,026 Wacon bacon. 429 00:24:22,028 --> 00:24:24,528 Your legal name is wacon bacon? 430 00:24:24,530 --> 00:24:25,729 There's no fucking way. 431 00:24:25,731 --> 00:24:29,099 Yeah. My parents did a lot of drugs. 432 00:24:29,101 --> 00:24:31,702 Yeah, wacon bacon, man. Wake up and toke 433 00:24:31,704 --> 00:24:33,737 right out of my mom's vag. 434 00:24:33,739 --> 00:24:36,941 Yeah, my brother lucked out. His legal name is Turkey. 435 00:24:36,943 --> 00:24:38,476 Turkey bacon. 436 00:24:38,478 --> 00:24:41,045 And he changed to Kevin, and became an actor. 437 00:24:41,047 --> 00:24:43,848 Have you seen like the movie, "tremors"? 438 00:24:43,850 --> 00:24:47,518 Hold on. You're brothers with Kevin bacon? 439 00:24:47,520 --> 00:24:48,819 Yeah, I'm his younger brother. 440 00:24:48,821 --> 00:24:50,721 The Kevin bacon? 441 00:24:50,723 --> 00:24:52,957 No, the other Kevin bacon. 442 00:24:52,959 --> 00:24:54,592 What the fuck. There's only one Kevin bacon. 443 00:24:54,594 --> 00:24:55,926 Jesus Christ. 444 00:24:55,928 --> 00:24:57,728 But yeah, I'm his younger brother, man. 445 00:24:57,730 --> 00:24:59,196 I uh-- we used to be really tight 446 00:24:59,198 --> 00:25:02,099 and I went on the set of "footloose," 447 00:25:02,101 --> 00:25:04,835 and John lithgow was taking a nap on set and I farted 448 00:25:04,837 --> 00:25:06,170 in his mouth. 449 00:25:06,172 --> 00:25:08,672 And, uh, nobody thought that was very funny, 450 00:25:08,674 --> 00:25:09,940 especially lithgow. 451 00:25:09,942 --> 00:25:12,176 He had really bad breath after that 452 00:25:12,178 --> 00:25:14,211 and ruined a couple scenes. 453 00:25:14,213 --> 00:25:20,017 But anyway, long story short, you wanna buy some weed? 454 00:25:20,019 --> 00:25:21,519 -Yeah. -Yeah, sure. 455 00:25:21,521 --> 00:25:22,553 All right, cool. 456 00:25:22,555 --> 00:25:23,954 Can we have the whistle? 457 00:25:23,956 --> 00:25:25,523 Give me my fucking whistle back, man, 458 00:25:25,525 --> 00:25:27,191 -are you psychotic? -All right, all right. 459 00:25:27,193 --> 00:25:28,893 Oh, wow, I'm taking a shit. 460 00:25:42,741 --> 00:25:46,610 All right, take out his text again. 461 00:25:46,612 --> 00:25:48,913 All right, remember what Tyler said. 462 00:25:48,915 --> 00:25:53,584 I gotta film you picking up a random girl. No dating sites. 463 00:25:53,586 --> 00:25:57,655 That girl over there, she looks beautiful. 464 00:25:57,657 --> 00:26:00,758 Bet her personality's even better. 465 00:26:00,760 --> 00:26:04,028 -Okay, am I good? -You're sick. 466 00:26:04,030 --> 00:26:05,963 Look at me. You're sick, you're sick. 467 00:26:05,965 --> 00:26:08,032 -All right. All right. -Be strong. 468 00:26:11,670 --> 00:26:13,170 Ring ring. 469 00:26:15,106 --> 00:26:16,640 Hello? 470 00:26:23,148 --> 00:26:24,782 All right, I'll tell her. 471 00:26:24,784 --> 00:26:26,784 Um, your pants just called 472 00:26:26,786 --> 00:26:30,921 and they wanna be on my bedroom floor. 473 00:26:30,923 --> 00:26:32,089 -Really? -Yeah. 474 00:26:32,091 --> 00:26:33,857 It just rang and I answered it 475 00:26:33,859 --> 00:26:38,062 and just delivering the message. 476 00:26:38,064 --> 00:26:40,030 Thanks. 477 00:26:47,138 --> 00:26:48,606 Oh, shit. 478 00:26:51,810 --> 00:26:54,211 There no fucking girls around here. 479 00:26:54,213 --> 00:26:57,281 No, this place is dry. 480 00:26:57,283 --> 00:26:59,350 Hold on. 481 00:26:59,352 --> 00:27:01,151 That fucking girl's just hot. 482 00:27:01,153 --> 00:27:04,888 -I don't know, man, she looks like a slut. -Exactly. 483 00:27:04,890 --> 00:27:06,790 Fucking go over there and make some like 484 00:27:06,792 --> 00:27:08,626 witty joke or something. 485 00:27:08,628 --> 00:27:11,662 --Just tell her to leave you alone. 486 00:27:11,664 --> 00:27:13,097 This is ridiculous. 487 00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:18,235 Okay. 488 00:27:18,237 --> 00:27:23,140 Hi, uh, you wanna, um... 489 00:27:23,142 --> 00:27:25,676 You wanna go to a lumber yard with me? 490 00:27:25,678 --> 00:27:28,012 Looks like you could use some wood. 491 00:27:28,014 --> 00:27:30,648 -Jerk. -Asshole. 492 00:27:31,850 --> 00:27:33,851 Oh, look who's a pussy now? 493 00:27:47,065 --> 00:27:49,266 You know, if you have sex with a handicap guy 494 00:27:49,268 --> 00:27:51,035 you go directly to heaven. 495 00:27:52,237 --> 00:27:55,305 What? You don't wanna be saved? 496 00:27:55,307 --> 00:27:57,074 Well, I guess you can go to hell. 497 00:28:09,187 --> 00:28:10,854 My god, I'm saved. 498 00:28:26,871 --> 00:28:30,741 Dude, put that thing out. What if someone sees? 499 00:28:30,743 --> 00:28:34,712 Dude, I have a cane. 500 00:28:34,714 --> 00:28:36,246 I'm not gonna get arrested. 501 00:28:44,823 --> 00:28:47,925 Oh, my god, I am so sorry. 502 00:28:47,927 --> 00:28:49,993 Nah, don't worry about it, it's fine. 503 00:28:53,131 --> 00:28:56,133 Well, well, well, what do we have here? 504 00:28:59,137 --> 00:29:00,471 Um... 505 00:29:03,308 --> 00:29:05,109 You know, normally I'd arrest someone 506 00:29:05,111 --> 00:29:07,911 for smoking marijuana out in public like this, but-- 507 00:29:09,814 --> 00:29:11,849 obviously this is medicinal, isn't it? 508 00:29:11,851 --> 00:29:14,952 Yes, it's medicinal marijuana. 509 00:29:14,954 --> 00:29:16,887 All right, be careful with that. 510 00:29:16,889 --> 00:29:20,457 Nobody else gets to smoke that but him, all right? 511 00:29:20,459 --> 00:29:22,326 -No problem. -All right. 512 00:29:24,329 --> 00:29:27,831 I'm really sorry. If you guys want a drink or some food or something, 513 00:29:27,833 --> 00:29:29,333 I can-- I work here, so-- 514 00:29:29,335 --> 00:29:31,168 well, we're Tyler's new employees. 515 00:29:31,170 --> 00:29:34,505 I'm Danny Kent, future business mogul. 516 00:29:34,507 --> 00:29:36,774 Power player. 517 00:29:36,776 --> 00:29:39,143 I'm ajay Kent, human being. 518 00:29:39,145 --> 00:29:41,111 You're both kents? 519 00:29:41,113 --> 00:29:42,780 You're not brothers, are you? 520 00:29:42,782 --> 00:29:44,448 Actually, we are. 521 00:29:44,450 --> 00:29:47,484 I would love to hear that story. 522 00:29:47,486 --> 00:29:49,286 -Maybe some other time. -Yeah. 523 00:29:49,288 --> 00:29:51,922 Okay, well, I'm Jessica, Tyler's niece, 524 00:29:51,924 --> 00:29:54,525 so if you guys need anything, just let me know. 525 00:29:58,363 --> 00:29:59,530 What are you doing with that cane, 526 00:29:59,532 --> 00:30:01,498 you little pecker? 527 00:30:01,500 --> 00:30:03,433 Oh, my god, you were faking it? 528 00:30:03,435 --> 00:30:05,102 Oh, my god! 529 00:30:05,104 --> 00:30:06,470 That's pathetic. 530 00:30:06,472 --> 00:30:08,105 Well, get inside and clean the toilets. 531 00:30:08,107 --> 00:30:09,873 Let's go. 532 00:30:15,580 --> 00:30:17,281 Make me a nice target, babe. 533 00:30:20,952 --> 00:30:22,853 Uh, your ball. 534 00:30:26,024 --> 00:30:27,524 Hold up, hold up. 535 00:30:27,526 --> 00:30:29,059 Almost got it. 536 00:30:29,061 --> 00:30:30,093 Hooyah! 537 00:30:30,095 --> 00:30:31,495 You're an insensitive prick. 538 00:30:31,497 --> 00:30:32,930 That's so cruel. 539 00:30:32,932 --> 00:30:34,932 Did you guys get what I wanted? 540 00:30:34,934 --> 00:30:37,100 -What? -The videotapes? 541 00:30:38,970 --> 00:30:41,238 - Not cool. 542 00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:44,174 - Oh, look who's a pussy now? 543 00:30:46,878 --> 00:30:49,246 You guys are such fucking losers. 544 00:30:49,248 --> 00:30:50,547 So now that we did what you asked, 545 00:30:50,549 --> 00:30:52,583 do we have a job or not? 546 00:30:52,585 --> 00:30:54,284 Well, you kinda did do what I asked, 547 00:30:54,286 --> 00:30:57,054 but you also failed miserably. 548 00:30:57,056 --> 00:30:58,322 So, is that a yes? 549 00:30:58,324 --> 00:30:59,990 Is that a yes? 550 00:30:59,992 --> 00:31:02,092 I have a very big delivery tonight. 551 00:31:02,094 --> 00:31:03,994 Clients that need booze for a party. 552 00:31:03,996 --> 00:31:06,230 156 Flanagan. 553 00:31:06,232 --> 00:31:07,564 Here's the address. 554 00:31:07,566 --> 00:31:09,900 Don't be late. 555 00:31:09,902 --> 00:31:11,501 We don't have a car. 556 00:31:11,503 --> 00:31:13,203 I'll have Jessica drive you. 557 00:31:13,205 --> 00:31:14,972 Now get the fuck outta here. 558 00:31:14,974 --> 00:31:17,441 Here's your phone. 559 00:31:17,443 --> 00:31:20,444 And guys, this party's a little bit kind of weird 560 00:31:20,446 --> 00:31:21,578 from what I've heard, 561 00:31:21,580 --> 00:31:23,881 so get in and get the fuck out. 562 00:31:30,421 --> 00:31:32,356 Okay, load it up. 563 00:31:34,993 --> 00:31:36,393 Nice wheels. 564 00:31:36,395 --> 00:31:38,295 It's not mine. 565 00:31:38,297 --> 00:31:40,430 Why would I drive around in this weird Van? 566 00:31:41,399 --> 00:31:43,133 Okay, listen, about earlier-- 567 00:31:43,135 --> 00:31:44,434 you know what? Just save it. 568 00:31:44,436 --> 00:31:47,070 Dirtbags like you are a dime a dozen. 569 00:31:47,072 --> 00:31:48,572 I see them at the bar every night. 570 00:31:49,507 --> 00:31:52,209 I'm not like them. 571 00:31:57,949 --> 00:31:59,149 It was an honest mistake. 572 00:31:59,151 --> 00:32:00,417 Honest? 573 00:32:00,419 --> 00:32:03,120 You're a pathetic little man. 574 00:32:03,122 --> 00:32:04,488 Whatever. 575 00:32:04,490 --> 00:32:08,058 When I die, people are gonna love me so much 576 00:32:08,060 --> 00:32:10,661 they're gonna put my body on top of a mountain, 577 00:32:10,663 --> 00:32:13,330 and an American flag of hot women, 578 00:32:13,332 --> 00:32:14,998 fucking soaked in oil, 579 00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:16,566 they're gonna mourn my death. 580 00:32:46,130 --> 00:32:47,965 Well, howdy, boys. 581 00:32:47,967 --> 00:32:50,968 Mrs. Hanks, I didn't know you had such a beautiful home. 582 00:32:50,970 --> 00:32:53,003 Oh, stop with the Mrs. Hanks. 583 00:32:53,005 --> 00:32:54,604 We're not in school. 584 00:32:54,606 --> 00:32:57,407 You can call me Monica. 585 00:32:57,409 --> 00:32:59,142 Okay. 586 00:32:59,144 --> 00:33:01,745 Well, don't just stand there, you have a job to do. 587 00:33:07,652 --> 00:33:09,553 Just unload it in the kitchen. 588 00:33:20,131 --> 00:33:22,099 For your troubles. 589 00:33:25,303 --> 00:33:29,406 -Wow, thanks. -Thanks. 590 00:33:29,408 --> 00:33:32,542 Danny, there's something i need to speak with you about. 591 00:33:32,544 --> 00:33:34,678 It's for school. 592 00:33:34,680 --> 00:33:36,747 Alone. 593 00:33:36,749 --> 00:33:40,017 Oh, all right, I'll wait in the Van. 594 00:33:40,019 --> 00:33:41,551 See you in the Van. 595 00:33:41,553 --> 00:33:44,654 Danny, I have an assignment for you. 596 00:33:44,656 --> 00:33:46,490 Will you come with me? 597 00:34:11,082 --> 00:34:13,350 Do you like what you see? 598 00:34:13,352 --> 00:34:14,684 Yes. 599 00:34:41,512 --> 00:34:43,380 Throw me on the bed. 600 00:34:51,856 --> 00:34:53,123 Monica. 601 00:34:54,425 --> 00:34:55,659 Fuck. 602 00:35:19,283 --> 00:35:21,151 Everything okay? 603 00:35:21,153 --> 00:35:23,186 What the fuck took so long? 604 00:35:23,188 --> 00:35:26,189 She wanted me to put it some place else. 605 00:35:26,191 --> 00:35:27,290 Uh, excuse me? 606 00:35:27,292 --> 00:35:29,326 The drinks. 607 00:35:29,328 --> 00:35:30,594 Forget-- let's just get outta here. 608 00:35:31,729 --> 00:35:33,497 Okay. 609 00:35:37,768 --> 00:35:39,803 Dude, what happened last night? You seemed off. 610 00:35:41,239 --> 00:35:42,439 I don't know. It was weird. 611 00:35:42,441 --> 00:35:45,342 Did Mrs. Hanks touch your pecker? 612 00:35:45,344 --> 00:35:47,144 Actually, no. 613 00:35:47,146 --> 00:35:49,479 But I did hear something weird going on back there. 614 00:35:49,481 --> 00:35:52,549 Weird? Like a dude getting banged in the ass? 615 00:35:52,551 --> 00:35:54,751 Guys! Get back to work! 616 00:35:54,753 --> 00:35:57,154 It's a full fucking bar inside. 617 00:35:57,156 --> 00:35:59,422 Hey, why you guys always dress in the same shit? 618 00:35:59,424 --> 00:36:01,591 Dress like a man. 619 00:36:01,593 --> 00:36:03,160 Get inside. 620 00:36:06,865 --> 00:36:09,332 -Hell, yeah! -Ay! Oh! 621 00:36:12,770 --> 00:36:14,704 Two more. 622 00:36:14,706 --> 00:36:16,373 You down with o.P.P.? 623 00:36:16,375 --> 00:36:18,775 You know me, baby angel. 624 00:36:18,777 --> 00:36:20,177 Here, it's for you, sweetheart. 625 00:36:20,179 --> 00:36:21,645 Oh, shit. 626 00:36:21,647 --> 00:36:23,713 Please don't throw money at me. 627 00:36:26,417 --> 00:36:29,653 Two more shots of your top vodka. 628 00:36:35,560 --> 00:36:36,826 What the fuck are you doing? 629 00:36:36,828 --> 00:36:38,762 What the fuck, bro. Do I know you? 630 00:36:38,764 --> 00:36:39,796 He was taking a picture. 631 00:36:39,798 --> 00:36:42,499 Ah! Not true. 632 00:36:42,501 --> 00:36:44,301 -What? -Get the fuck out of here. 633 00:36:44,303 --> 00:36:46,703 You two. Now! 634 00:36:46,705 --> 00:36:48,872 -Whoa! -You're fucking serious? 635 00:36:52,510 --> 00:36:55,645 That's why you fucking bitches belong in a god damn strip club. 636 00:36:55,647 --> 00:36:58,381 -Oh, shit. -Fuck! 637 00:36:58,383 --> 00:36:59,883 Bitch! 638 00:37:10,628 --> 00:37:12,862 I'm sorry for the way I've been treating you, Danny. 639 00:37:12,864 --> 00:37:14,931 Just forget it. 640 00:37:14,933 --> 00:37:18,468 Maybe we could start over? 641 00:37:18,470 --> 00:37:20,437 Of course. 642 00:37:20,439 --> 00:37:22,272 I'm Jessica goodall. 643 00:37:22,274 --> 00:37:24,441 Jessica, I'm Danny Kent. 644 00:37:26,010 --> 00:37:30,814 Do you wanna go out sometime? 645 00:37:30,816 --> 00:37:33,450 He's only 17. 646 00:37:33,452 --> 00:37:34,985 My mom's nine years older than my dad, 647 00:37:34,987 --> 00:37:37,954 and I'll be 18 of next week. 648 00:37:37,956 --> 00:37:39,589 Let's go. 649 00:37:41,459 --> 00:37:42,759 Get back to work. 650 00:37:45,029 --> 00:37:46,963 Have you been there the whole time? 651 00:37:46,965 --> 00:37:48,365 Someone's gotta do the work. 652 00:37:48,367 --> 00:37:50,033 Yeah, someone's gotta do the work. 653 00:37:52,436 --> 00:37:53,770 Fucking crack head. 654 00:37:53,772 --> 00:37:55,038 Uh! 655 00:38:01,946 --> 00:38:03,980 That's the real Cunningham pennyfeather. 656 00:38:05,983 --> 00:38:08,018 I'm gonna talk to him. 657 00:38:12,490 --> 00:38:15,558 I own many horses. 658 00:38:15,560 --> 00:38:18,595 Horses? Horses? 659 00:38:18,597 --> 00:38:21,765 Oh, god, don't say I wandered into some barn again. 660 00:38:21,767 --> 00:38:24,868 No sir, this is a bar. 661 00:38:24,870 --> 00:38:28,672 A bar? 662 00:38:28,674 --> 00:38:30,407 Well, then. 663 00:38:31,475 --> 00:38:33,410 Can you get me a drink then? 664 00:38:33,412 --> 00:38:35,912 You gonna have the usual, Mr. pennyfeather? 665 00:38:39,083 --> 00:38:42,552 Well, only if the usual comes I suppose. 666 00:38:42,554 --> 00:38:43,787 Work a little. 667 00:38:43,789 --> 00:38:46,489 Sweat them up what you got there. 668 00:38:46,491 --> 00:38:49,959 If you know what I mean. 669 00:38:49,961 --> 00:38:52,696 I don't know what you mean. 670 00:38:52,698 --> 00:38:54,698 Actually. 671 00:38:54,700 --> 00:38:57,667 This young fella here, you know what I mean. 672 00:38:57,669 --> 00:38:59,035 Oh, yeah. I know what he means. 673 00:38:59,037 --> 00:39:00,337 He knows. 674 00:39:02,506 --> 00:39:07,510 Sir, I just wanna say that the power triangle changed my life, 675 00:39:07,512 --> 00:39:10,113 and it turned me into the person I currently am. 676 00:39:10,115 --> 00:39:11,348 Well, that's good. 677 00:39:11,350 --> 00:39:13,049 That'll be eight bucks. 678 00:39:15,619 --> 00:39:20,557 Uh, how about you taking care of this young fella? 679 00:39:20,559 --> 00:39:23,793 From one power triangle to another, 680 00:39:23,795 --> 00:39:25,428 glad we're here. 681 00:39:25,430 --> 00:39:26,863 The pleasure's all mine. 682 00:39:26,865 --> 00:39:29,399 Thank you, sir. 683 00:39:29,401 --> 00:39:30,934 Get back to work. 684 00:39:39,577 --> 00:39:42,645 Pennyfeather, this better be worth my time. 685 00:39:42,647 --> 00:39:45,548 I just left my youth wrestling tournament. 686 00:39:45,550 --> 00:39:48,618 I didn't know you coached. 687 00:39:48,620 --> 00:39:52,088 -Most happy. -Yeah, coach, yeah? 688 00:39:52,090 --> 00:39:55,592 Well, that's a nice euphemism for legal child molestation. 689 00:39:55,594 --> 00:39:57,160 Coaching, hell, no. Those are meat markets. 690 00:39:57,162 --> 00:40:01,030 I go there for the young gonad. 691 00:40:01,032 --> 00:40:03,666 There you go, 692 00:40:03,668 --> 00:40:06,436 straight from the presses. 693 00:40:06,438 --> 00:40:12,108 Guarantee offered in the loo, my friend. 694 00:40:12,110 --> 00:40:15,478 What would I do with your pube little Tome, huh? 695 00:40:23,087 --> 00:40:24,788 I'm kinda down at the moment. 696 00:40:24,790 --> 00:40:30,493 You know i-- I just kinda need an infusion of cash, 697 00:40:30,495 --> 00:40:31,795 if you know what mean. 698 00:40:31,797 --> 00:40:33,163 I mean, I'll do anything. 699 00:40:33,165 --> 00:40:35,098 Anything. 700 00:40:35,100 --> 00:40:36,733 Now you listen to me, you old queer. 701 00:40:36,735 --> 00:40:38,101 Don't come on to me like that, okay? 702 00:40:38,103 --> 00:40:40,937 Damn it, kosta! 703 00:40:40,939 --> 00:40:42,138 My water pesters me. 704 00:40:42,140 --> 00:40:43,840 I've got no where in this world 705 00:40:43,842 --> 00:40:46,743 where I can sit and get an iota of comfort. 706 00:40:46,745 --> 00:40:48,745 God, you are really fucking with my vibe right now, 707 00:40:48,747 --> 00:40:51,147 you know that? 708 00:40:51,149 --> 00:40:53,183 Fine, fine. 709 00:40:55,619 --> 00:40:57,687 Now look, this party makes the illuminati 710 00:40:57,689 --> 00:40:59,189 look like a bunch of mormons, okay? 711 00:40:59,191 --> 00:41:02,959 They're real power players, real men with real cash. 712 00:41:02,961 --> 00:41:05,862 You gotta behave like someone kind of important. 713 00:41:05,864 --> 00:41:08,231 The address is 256 Flanagan. 714 00:41:08,233 --> 00:41:12,769 Bring your crap and be ready, okay? 715 00:41:12,771 --> 00:41:14,237 Dude, did you hear that? 716 00:41:14,239 --> 00:41:16,039 It's the same place we were last night. 717 00:41:16,041 --> 00:41:17,640 So? It's a fucking party in a mansion. 718 00:41:17,642 --> 00:41:19,476 What do you expect? 719 00:41:19,478 --> 00:41:22,145 Yeah, a mansion where I heard some guy scream, "Chrissy." 720 00:41:22,147 --> 00:41:24,214 Well, what do you wanna do? Call the cops? 721 00:41:24,216 --> 00:41:25,949 Are you fucking crazy? 722 00:41:25,951 --> 00:41:29,185 If we find Chrissy Morgan, we'd be famous. 723 00:41:29,187 --> 00:41:30,220 Why would I? 724 00:41:30,222 --> 00:41:33,056 I promise I will. I will! 725 00:41:33,058 --> 00:41:34,524 And one more thing, pennyfeather. 726 00:41:34,526 --> 00:41:36,092 Don't even pretend to be straight. 727 00:41:36,094 --> 00:41:39,162 And don't bring your dead wife's ashes, please. 728 00:41:39,164 --> 00:41:42,599 Oh, no, Lucy, she'll stay in the glove compartment 729 00:41:42,601 --> 00:41:43,900 like she always does. 730 00:41:43,902 --> 00:41:48,071 -Yeah. Whatever. -Thank you. Thank you. 731 00:41:48,073 --> 00:41:50,139 I can see the fucking headlines, 732 00:41:50,141 --> 00:41:53,643 "Kent brothers find missing girl." 733 00:41:53,645 --> 00:41:56,212 It's fucking iconic. 734 00:41:56,214 --> 00:41:58,281 All right, I see where you're going with this. 735 00:42:09,260 --> 00:42:10,760 I got an idea. 736 00:42:40,824 --> 00:42:41,858 Thinking what I'm thinking? 737 00:42:41,860 --> 00:42:44,160 Fortunately, yes. 738 00:42:46,697 --> 00:42:48,231 How do I look? 739 00:42:48,233 --> 00:42:50,033 You have the body of an oil tycoon 740 00:42:50,035 --> 00:42:54,237 and the face of an 18-year-old virgin. 741 00:42:54,239 --> 00:42:56,072 How about now? 742 00:42:56,074 --> 00:42:57,340 Surprisingly convincing. 743 00:42:57,342 --> 00:43:00,243 But you should acquire a fake beard. 744 00:43:08,652 --> 00:43:09,752 Fly me-- 745 00:43:09,754 --> 00:43:11,254 hey, Danny, you in? 746 00:43:11,256 --> 00:43:13,323 Yeah, just waiting for Justin to get around back. 747 00:43:19,697 --> 00:43:21,864 Okay, anything I can do? 748 00:43:21,866 --> 00:43:24,634 Email me the Wikipedia page for pennyfeather. 749 00:43:24,636 --> 00:43:25,802 I don't want to be caught off guard 750 00:43:25,804 --> 00:43:27,136 if anyone starts asking questions. 751 00:43:27,138 --> 00:43:29,739 Hey, Danny, be safe, all right? 752 00:43:29,741 --> 00:43:31,774 Take care of Jessica. 753 00:43:31,776 --> 00:43:33,610 It's gonna be epic. 754 00:43:36,113 --> 00:43:38,781 I am old money. I own several horses. 755 00:43:38,783 --> 00:43:40,750 The cobbler will know my name. 756 00:43:45,022 --> 00:43:49,092 Batten down the hatch, i have arrived. 757 00:43:49,094 --> 00:43:53,329 Oh, my god, Michael j, it's so good to see you. 758 00:43:53,331 --> 00:43:57,033 Oh! Velour, velour, velour. 759 00:43:58,068 --> 00:43:59,869 Have a good time tonight. 760 00:43:59,871 --> 00:44:03,339 Hi, hi, hi. Oh, my god! 761 00:44:03,341 --> 00:44:07,143 Oh! It's the lone ranger. I love a man in a mask. 762 00:44:07,145 --> 00:44:09,078 Oh, my god, i love a man in a mask. 763 00:44:09,080 --> 00:44:10,880 Where is Tonto? 764 00:44:13,751 --> 00:44:16,653 Oh! Must be Tonto. Oh, my god. 765 00:44:16,655 --> 00:44:18,721 You were always my favorite. 766 00:44:18,723 --> 00:44:22,759 There must be guns inside. Can't wait. Oh, my god. 767 00:44:24,061 --> 00:44:25,828 Invitation? 768 00:44:55,759 --> 00:44:57,393 You've reached the Brian studs hotline. 769 00:44:57,395 --> 00:44:59,996 To begin your sexual journey, press one. 770 00:45:28,892 --> 00:45:30,727 Show me the secret sign, please. 771 00:45:34,164 --> 00:45:36,899 What do you like to do, ajay? 772 00:45:36,901 --> 00:45:38,000 I like to draw. 773 00:45:38,002 --> 00:45:40,136 Are you any good? 774 00:45:40,138 --> 00:45:42,839 Yeah, I mean, I got a full ride scholarship 775 00:45:42,841 --> 00:45:44,207 to fine arts institute. 776 00:45:44,209 --> 00:45:46,409 Are you still in school? 777 00:45:46,411 --> 00:45:48,978 Yeah, I'm a high school senior. 778 00:45:48,980 --> 00:45:52,348 What do I look like in your mind? 779 00:45:52,350 --> 00:45:56,285 Well, you're probably sitting next to a microphone, 780 00:45:56,287 --> 00:46:01,824 and you're a musician, so you're probably slender and artistic. 781 00:46:01,826 --> 00:46:03,860 You're more right than you think. 782 00:46:10,968 --> 00:46:14,937 Bob! Did you hear that? 783 00:46:14,939 --> 00:46:16,472 What? 784 00:46:16,474 --> 00:46:19,142 Stop messing around, Bob, i thought I heard someone. 785 00:46:19,144 --> 00:46:21,778 No, honey, I think you're just being paranoid. 786 00:46:22,980 --> 00:46:24,380 I'm sorry. 787 00:46:24,382 --> 00:46:26,349 I haven't been sleeping well lately. 788 00:46:26,351 --> 00:46:28,851 I'm just so worried about the boys. 789 00:46:30,254 --> 00:46:32,455 They're good kids, honey. 790 00:46:32,457 --> 00:46:34,290 They just got a little carried away. 791 00:46:34,292 --> 00:46:37,160 I'm sure you remember what it was like being a teenager 792 00:46:37,162 --> 00:46:41,497 with all those hormones, hmm? 793 00:46:41,499 --> 00:46:42,565 Mmm. 794 00:46:44,835 --> 00:46:48,504 Hey, now, all right. 795 00:46:48,506 --> 00:46:50,439 -Hey. -Mmm. 796 00:46:50,441 --> 00:46:52,909 So do you remember how to make a "hormone"? 797 00:46:52,911 --> 00:46:54,944 Oh, yes, I do. 798 00:46:54,946 --> 00:46:57,580 My little Bobby wants some sugar, mamma bear. 799 00:46:57,582 --> 00:47:01,951 I got some sugar for papa bear. Come on. 800 00:47:01,953 --> 00:47:04,153 Come to mama. 801 00:47:04,155 --> 00:47:08,257 So that pretty much sums up why I'm stuck working at a bar 802 00:47:08,259 --> 00:47:13,062 with an overgrown man child and an undergrown-- child. 803 00:47:13,064 --> 00:47:14,463 I don't mean to interrupt, 804 00:47:14,465 --> 00:47:16,232 but did you say you hung hundreds of dildos 805 00:47:16,234 --> 00:47:18,601 from the ceiling and the walls at your school? 806 00:47:18,603 --> 00:47:20,570 Well, my brother, Danny did. 807 00:47:20,572 --> 00:47:22,371 Wow, that's kind of impressive. 808 00:47:22,373 --> 00:47:25,074 I mean, I helped, too. It was both of us. 809 00:47:25,076 --> 00:47:26,843 Sounds like your brother, Danny, 810 00:47:26,845 --> 00:47:29,178 is over compensating for his perceived lack of success 811 00:47:29,180 --> 00:47:31,948 by creating situations to impress those on him. 812 00:47:31,950 --> 00:47:36,285 Yes! Finally! Someone who understands. 813 00:47:36,287 --> 00:47:38,120 Remember that everyone has a journey 814 00:47:38,122 --> 00:47:41,224 and must come to a personal truth at their own pace. 815 00:47:41,226 --> 00:47:43,559 Life is not a sprint, but a marathon. 816 00:47:53,370 --> 00:47:54,570 Get in here. 817 00:47:54,572 --> 00:47:58,207 Shh. 818 00:47:58,209 --> 00:47:59,976 I can't believe i agreed to this. 819 00:47:59,978 --> 00:48:01,911 What's the plan? 820 00:48:01,913 --> 00:48:03,613 I don't exactly have one yet. 821 00:48:03,615 --> 00:48:06,182 Oh, that's just perfect. 822 00:48:06,184 --> 00:48:09,452 Okay, how about I stay away from everything, 823 00:48:09,454 --> 00:48:11,220 if Chrissy Morgan's here she's isolated from the party. 824 00:48:11,222 --> 00:48:12,655 Okay. 825 00:48:12,657 --> 00:48:15,458 Get out there and mingle, I'll look for her. 826 00:48:15,460 --> 00:48:17,627 All right. I'll look for anyone suspicious. 827 00:48:17,629 --> 00:48:19,962 -Okay. -And Jessica, 828 00:48:19,964 --> 00:48:25,902 if anything happens to you, 829 00:48:25,904 --> 00:48:29,338 all right-- uh, high five? Good luck. 830 00:48:30,274 --> 00:48:32,108 Fist bump. 831 00:49:13,417 --> 00:49:15,251 This had better be good, Steven. 832 00:49:15,253 --> 00:49:17,486 Oh, it's gonna be good. 833 00:49:17,488 --> 00:49:19,255 She's almost ready for the ceremony. 834 00:49:19,257 --> 00:49:20,656 Watch this. 835 00:49:22,225 --> 00:49:23,626 Bow. 836 00:49:26,129 --> 00:49:29,432 Oh, for god's sake. Bow a little lower 837 00:49:29,434 --> 00:49:31,534 for the madam, please. 838 00:49:34,137 --> 00:49:36,272 That's better. 839 00:49:36,274 --> 00:49:40,009 Now watch this. 840 00:49:40,011 --> 00:49:41,577 First position. 841 00:49:45,615 --> 00:49:47,216 Decent. 842 00:49:48,618 --> 00:49:50,753 Second position. 843 00:49:58,062 --> 00:50:00,629 Unacceptable. 844 00:50:00,631 --> 00:50:02,398 Damn it, Chrissy. 845 00:50:04,601 --> 00:50:09,105 You know, if we really want to do this right, 846 00:50:09,107 --> 00:50:10,606 I think some deep red dahlias 847 00:50:10,608 --> 00:50:13,075 would accent the blood vessels. 848 00:50:13,077 --> 00:50:16,712 -No! -Oh, shut up, you little slut. 849 00:50:16,714 --> 00:50:19,048 At least you're wearing a white wedding dress. 850 00:50:42,406 --> 00:50:43,639 Whoa! Whoa! Guys, easy. 851 00:50:43,641 --> 00:50:45,074 Easy, Chrissy! 852 00:50:45,076 --> 00:50:48,077 -Winner, first fall. -Hey! 853 00:50:48,079 --> 00:50:49,578 Oh, honey, you were great. 854 00:50:49,580 --> 00:50:51,247 Boy, if you had a fucking dick, 855 00:50:51,249 --> 00:50:52,748 you and me would be good. 856 00:50:52,750 --> 00:50:55,351 Yeah, god. Nicely done. 857 00:50:55,353 --> 00:50:57,153 Hey, pennyfeather, get your ass over here. 858 00:50:57,155 --> 00:50:58,487 Help me lube up here. 859 00:50:58,489 --> 00:51:00,256 Here hold this for me, would you? 860 00:51:01,458 --> 00:51:03,259 Don't drink that shit, it's lube! 861 00:51:03,261 --> 00:51:06,062 I guess it comes down to being ashamed 862 00:51:06,064 --> 00:51:07,763 of my disappointing parents. 863 00:51:07,765 --> 00:51:10,533 Sweetie, this isn't 1950 anymore. 864 00:51:10,535 --> 00:51:12,368 If people can't love you for being who you are, 865 00:51:12,370 --> 00:51:16,172 do you really want them in your life? 866 00:51:16,174 --> 00:51:19,375 I just don't wanna be disowned by my parents. 867 00:51:19,377 --> 00:51:21,444 I'm sure if you knew what your parents were into, 868 00:51:21,446 --> 00:51:23,245 it would shock you. 869 00:51:28,853 --> 00:51:30,786 Papa bear. 870 00:51:38,296 --> 00:51:40,596 Yeah, I guess, but what about Danny? 871 00:51:40,598 --> 00:51:44,100 I'm sure Danny will find a way to become comfortable with this. 872 00:51:44,102 --> 00:51:46,435 What about some nice bleeding hearts? 873 00:51:48,205 --> 00:51:50,272 You stupid son of a bitch. 874 00:51:50,274 --> 00:51:52,274 If it weren't for me, none of these girls 875 00:51:52,276 --> 00:51:53,843 would have beautiful sacrifices. 876 00:51:53,845 --> 00:51:57,113 If it were left up to you, they would all be just dying 877 00:51:57,115 --> 00:51:59,615 in front of wood paneling and shag carpeting. 878 00:51:59,617 --> 00:52:01,817 Yes, dear. 879 00:52:03,820 --> 00:52:07,823 You know what? I forgot to call my sister. 880 00:52:07,825 --> 00:52:11,894 I was gonna ask her about staying at the lake this summer. 881 00:52:11,896 --> 00:52:14,530 I think the boys would like a surprise visit to the lake. 882 00:52:16,267 --> 00:52:18,334 Who's this on my phone? 883 00:52:21,171 --> 00:52:24,206 Get off my phone, freak! 884 00:52:24,208 --> 00:52:25,808 No, I'm not gone. 885 00:52:25,810 --> 00:52:28,277 Get your butt downstairs right now, mister. 886 00:52:32,883 --> 00:52:35,484 Ajay, were you getting catfished? 887 00:52:35,486 --> 00:52:36,819 What? I don't-- 888 00:52:36,821 --> 00:52:38,487 do you even know what that means? 889 00:52:38,489 --> 00:52:41,357 Now, son, now we only want what's best for you. 890 00:52:41,359 --> 00:52:43,159 Listen, I know what I heard. 891 00:52:43,161 --> 00:52:45,194 And if this is another one of yours and Danny's pranks, 892 00:52:45,196 --> 00:52:46,829 I want it to stop now. 893 00:52:46,831 --> 00:52:48,597 -But mom-- -but nothing. 894 00:52:48,599 --> 00:52:51,267 Your father and I work too hard to keep you kids fed 895 00:52:51,269 --> 00:52:52,635 with a roof over your heads. 896 00:52:52,637 --> 00:52:53,936 I expect this from Danny. 897 00:52:53,938 --> 00:52:55,237 Not you, ajay. 898 00:52:55,239 --> 00:52:57,339 Speaking of-- where is he? 899 00:52:57,341 --> 00:52:58,641 Go get him. 900 00:52:58,643 --> 00:53:01,510 Oh, uh, he told me he wasn't feeling well. 901 00:53:01,512 --> 00:53:02,611 I think he already went to bed. 902 00:53:02,613 --> 00:53:04,847 I don't care. Go get him. 903 00:53:06,349 --> 00:53:08,784 My god, I picture you with six inches of cock 904 00:53:08,786 --> 00:53:09,885 and bullets the size of Rhode Island, 905 00:53:09,887 --> 00:53:10,920 you hear me? 906 00:53:10,922 --> 00:53:12,421 That's beautiful, well done. 907 00:53:12,423 --> 00:53:13,589 I gotta take this. I gotta take this. 908 00:53:13,591 --> 00:53:14,757 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 909 00:53:16,226 --> 00:53:19,261 Dude, you just saved me from the weirdest shit. 910 00:53:19,263 --> 00:53:21,297 It's mom. She wants to see you now. 911 00:53:21,299 --> 00:53:22,565 Well, how can i do that, ajay, 912 00:53:22,567 --> 00:53:24,266 when I'm Cunningham pennyfeather 913 00:53:24,268 --> 00:53:26,835 surrounded by a bunch of oiled up muscle chicks? 914 00:53:26,837 --> 00:53:28,737 What? Where are you? 915 00:53:28,739 --> 00:53:30,573 Okay, look, stall mom, 916 00:53:30,575 --> 00:53:32,208 and I'll be home as fast as I can. 917 00:53:32,210 --> 00:53:33,776 Ajay, get over here now! 918 00:53:38,648 --> 00:53:39,815 Chrissy! 919 00:53:41,384 --> 00:53:42,384 Stop that! 920 00:53:42,386 --> 00:53:43,953 Somebody stop her! 921 00:53:43,955 --> 00:53:45,554 -Stop her! -Sorry. 922 00:53:45,556 --> 00:53:48,390 We've got an imposter! We've got an imposter! 923 00:53:48,392 --> 00:53:49,792 Let me-- 924 00:53:49,794 --> 00:53:51,927 --stop him! Stop him! 925 00:53:51,929 --> 00:53:53,696 - Go! -He's got my clothes on, stop him. 926 00:53:53,698 --> 00:53:56,765 -Police!. -He's got my clothes on, stop him! Stop him! 927 00:53:58,335 --> 00:54:00,869 Danny Kent, what in the fuck are you doing here? 928 00:54:00,871 --> 00:54:02,605 Catch you little prick! 929 00:54:02,607 --> 00:54:05,441 -I'm getting you, -you little cock sucker. Stop him! 930 00:54:05,443 --> 00:54:08,244 -Do you hear me? -Stop the man! Stop him! 931 00:54:12,549 --> 00:54:14,483 Mom, he's uh, he's got the shits. 932 00:54:14,485 --> 00:54:15,985 He's shitting real bad up there. 933 00:54:15,987 --> 00:54:18,287 I think he ate that COD meal. 934 00:54:18,289 --> 00:54:19,755 Okay, well, ask him if he wants me 935 00:54:19,757 --> 00:54:21,490 to make him some tea for his tummy. 936 00:54:21,492 --> 00:54:24,360 But as soon as he's done, to get his rear down here. 937 00:54:24,362 --> 00:54:25,527 Okay, will do, will do. 938 00:54:25,529 --> 00:54:27,563 I'll get him right away. 939 00:55:01,431 --> 00:55:03,599 Okay, here comes lavey. 940 00:55:03,601 --> 00:55:05,567 Tyler, dude, where are you? 941 00:55:14,344 --> 00:55:16,445 Tyler, dude, where are you? 942 00:55:16,447 --> 00:55:18,414 I'm pretty sure I found Chrissy Morgan. 943 00:55:18,416 --> 00:55:20,683 Oh, yeah, and Jessica might have been kidnapped. 944 00:55:20,685 --> 00:55:21,750 Okay, bye. 945 00:55:21,752 --> 00:55:22,918 Hurry up, come in. 946 00:55:26,589 --> 00:55:28,590 I wanna go on the record for being totally against this. 947 00:55:28,592 --> 00:55:30,326 Did you want mom to catch you? 948 00:55:30,328 --> 00:55:34,330 Boys, be here, now! 949 00:55:34,332 --> 00:55:35,798 What the hell, boys? 950 00:55:35,800 --> 00:55:37,366 Just when I think things cant get any worse, 951 00:55:37,368 --> 00:55:38,834 you pull this crap. 952 00:55:38,836 --> 00:55:42,438 - Mom, you don't understand. 953 00:55:42,440 --> 00:55:44,340 I wonder who it could be at this hour. 954 00:55:44,342 --> 00:55:45,908 I don't know, go check, Bob. 955 00:55:52,949 --> 00:55:54,350 It's a police officer. 956 00:55:54,352 --> 00:55:56,618 Christ, what did you kids do now? 957 00:56:02,726 --> 00:56:05,094 Hi, officer. What can I do for you? 958 00:56:05,096 --> 00:56:07,062 I can't believe you hired an escort. 959 00:56:07,064 --> 00:56:09,965 Who even delivers at this hour? 960 00:56:09,967 --> 00:56:12,134 Well, you're not a real police officer. 961 00:56:12,136 --> 00:56:14,870 I'm not here to dance. 962 00:56:17,640 --> 00:56:20,008 This is how this is about to go down, you see? 963 00:56:29,620 --> 00:56:31,019 Who is that? 964 00:56:31,021 --> 00:56:33,088 Why the fuck are you throwing carrots? 965 00:56:36,493 --> 00:56:38,761 Give me the orange. 966 00:56:50,974 --> 00:56:53,776 Guys, come on, let's go. 967 00:56:55,945 --> 00:56:57,079 Where are you taking them? 968 00:56:57,081 --> 00:56:58,113 -What? -What are you doing? 969 00:56:58,115 --> 00:56:59,448 Wait! 970 00:57:05,722 --> 00:57:07,756 Come on, this way. 971 00:57:18,701 --> 00:57:19,902 Damn it. 972 00:57:25,842 --> 00:57:28,010 Did you do as I asked? 973 00:57:31,481 --> 00:57:32,981 And who might that be? 974 00:57:38,655 --> 00:57:41,089 Oh, terrific! 975 00:57:41,091 --> 00:57:45,194 Just one day before the biggest sacrificial offering 976 00:57:45,196 --> 00:57:47,196 in the history of secret societies 977 00:57:47,198 --> 00:57:50,165 and we have three men who know too much. 978 00:57:54,604 --> 00:57:58,874 The most wealthy, powerful men in the known universe 979 00:57:58,876 --> 00:58:01,777 are going to be here tomorrow night. 980 00:58:01,779 --> 00:58:04,813 Men, who, mind you, are paying me good money to be a part 981 00:58:04,815 --> 00:58:09,017 of sacrificial offerings. 982 00:58:09,019 --> 00:58:12,721 We must not let these kids foil our plans. 983 00:58:17,026 --> 00:58:18,894 Just kill them. 984 00:58:21,631 --> 00:58:22,965 Where are we? 985 00:58:22,967 --> 00:58:25,968 You ask way too many questions, kid. 986 00:58:25,970 --> 00:58:27,569 -Too many questions? -Yeah. 987 00:58:27,571 --> 00:58:29,938 I think now is the perfect time 988 00:58:29,940 --> 00:58:33,542 to ask many, many, many fucking questions. 989 00:58:33,544 --> 00:58:35,577 My girl's in danger. 990 00:58:35,579 --> 00:58:37,713 Your girl? You mean my niece? 991 00:58:37,715 --> 00:58:39,581 The one you dragged into this mess 992 00:58:39,583 --> 00:58:41,517 because you couldn't mind your own business? 993 00:58:41,519 --> 00:58:43,218 Guys, look. 994 00:58:43,220 --> 00:58:44,753 We're in imminent danger 995 00:58:44,755 --> 00:58:47,089 and you bring us to see an old fucking lady. 996 00:58:47,091 --> 00:58:48,757 What, is she going to give us a cough drop 997 00:58:48,759 --> 00:58:48,757 and tell us how polio was? 998 00:58:48,759 --> 00:58:52,027 That's my grandmother and she can hear you. 999 00:58:52,029 --> 00:58:54,062 Guys, shut the fuck up, all right? 1000 00:59:05,275 --> 00:59:09,044 -We're here because, uh-- -i know. 1001 00:59:09,046 --> 00:59:12,548 So what are you gonna do about it? 1002 00:59:12,550 --> 00:59:14,883 Oh, um, that's why we're here. 1003 00:59:14,885 --> 00:59:16,285 I see. 1004 00:59:16,287 --> 00:59:17,786 Get rest. 1005 00:59:19,022 --> 00:59:21,823 You're gonna need it. 1006 00:59:23,626 --> 00:59:26,161 Insecurity. 1007 00:59:26,163 --> 00:59:28,163 Lack of self understanding. 1008 00:59:28,165 --> 00:59:32,134 And most prominently, a fear of the truth. 1009 00:59:32,136 --> 00:59:34,169 These are all human attributes. 1010 00:59:34,171 --> 00:59:36,204 Attributes I see in the three of you. 1011 00:59:46,249 --> 00:59:48,317 Oh, what is that? 1012 00:59:48,319 --> 00:59:49,785 Bunch of pussies. 1013 00:59:59,362 --> 01:00:02,097 The sooner you set yourselves free 1014 01:00:02,099 --> 01:00:03,899 the sooner we can free Jessica. 1015 01:00:09,272 --> 01:00:12,741 Unity amongst you is beautiful 1016 01:00:12,743 --> 01:00:15,744 and will grow stronger with time and trust. 1017 01:00:18,881 --> 01:00:22,718 Now whether Tyler told you, i raised Jessica. 1018 01:00:22,720 --> 01:00:26,021 She is an amazing young bright woman, 1019 01:00:26,023 --> 01:00:28,624 and she means the world to me. 1020 01:00:28,626 --> 01:00:29,992 You know where she is? 1021 01:00:29,994 --> 01:00:31,960 I know where she is. 1022 01:00:31,962 --> 01:00:33,295 We need knives and guns. 1023 01:00:33,297 --> 01:00:35,197 No guns, no knives. 1024 01:00:35,199 --> 01:00:39,301 When I was a secret agent I used only unconventional tactics, 1025 01:00:39,303 --> 01:00:41,203 things no one had ever seen. 1026 01:00:42,305 --> 01:00:45,207 Where do we find such things? 1027 01:00:45,209 --> 01:00:48,243 Within yourselves. Team work together. 1028 01:00:48,245 --> 01:00:51,079 Let the synergy be your guide. 1029 01:00:51,081 --> 01:00:52,948 The three of you make a triangle. 1030 01:00:52,950 --> 01:00:55,350 The power triangle. 1031 01:00:55,352 --> 01:00:58,220 I have faith in you three. 1032 01:00:58,222 --> 01:01:00,756 On the count of three, let's do a power triangle. 1033 01:01:02,158 --> 01:01:03,992 One, two, three. 1034 01:01:03,994 --> 01:01:05,661 Power triangle. 1035 01:01:07,096 --> 01:01:08,830 Everything okay? 1036 01:01:08,832 --> 01:01:10,832 Now press the envelope and deliver. 1037 01:01:14,704 --> 01:01:15,904 Let's get epic. 1038 01:01:45,868 --> 01:01:48,103 There's our man right there. 1039 01:01:48,105 --> 01:01:50,272 There's our man. This man will hate you. 1040 01:01:50,274 --> 01:01:52,074 When we're on, we're good. 1041 01:01:53,177 --> 01:01:54,376 Throw my money. Get my money. 1042 01:01:54,378 --> 01:01:56,445 This is my money. 1043 01:01:56,447 --> 01:01:58,146 You're a pathetic little man. 1044 01:01:58,148 --> 01:01:59,948 Your greed sickens me. 1045 01:01:59,950 --> 01:02:01,216 You don't-- you don't understand 1046 01:02:01,218 --> 01:02:03,051 the power of the triangle, kid. 1047 01:02:03,053 --> 01:02:05,721 No, you don't understand the power of the triangle. 1048 01:02:08,125 --> 01:02:09,858 Go to sleep, old man. 1049 01:02:25,441 --> 01:02:27,142 I'm going in. 1050 01:02:29,078 --> 01:02:30,912 Shit, I don't have my phone. 1051 01:02:30,914 --> 01:02:32,380 Here, take mine. 1052 01:02:34,250 --> 01:02:35,450 Thanks, bro. 1053 01:02:35,452 --> 01:02:38,487 Bro? Since when do you call me bro? 1054 01:02:38,489 --> 01:02:40,489 This is the first time I feel like I've been one to you. 1055 01:02:40,491 --> 01:02:41,923 I expect to hear a lot more then. 1056 01:02:41,925 --> 01:02:44,259 Listen, enough of this, you two love birds. 1057 01:02:44,261 --> 01:02:47,829 When you locate Jessica, you text us. 1058 01:02:47,831 --> 01:02:49,464 We got your back. 1059 01:03:04,313 --> 01:03:05,480 Ticket. 1060 01:03:07,216 --> 01:03:11,119 Uh, I left it in my delorean next to my flux capacitor. 1061 01:03:11,121 --> 01:03:14,389 Very funny, kosta, used that line last night. 1062 01:03:14,391 --> 01:03:16,291 I still need a ticket. 1063 01:03:24,066 --> 01:03:26,001 Enjoy your evening, sir. 1064 01:03:34,477 --> 01:03:37,445 Kosta, your presence is requested. 1065 01:04:07,844 --> 01:04:09,911 This is your night. 1066 01:04:12,849 --> 01:04:14,216 Why are you doing this to me? 1067 01:04:14,218 --> 01:04:16,618 All because... 1068 01:04:19,388 --> 01:04:21,590 I wanna make you look... 1069 01:04:22,959 --> 01:04:25,493 Fabulous, yeah. 1070 01:04:26,929 --> 01:04:31,566 - Mmm...Mmm... That's pretty. 1071 01:04:36,072 --> 01:04:38,874 This was my mother's wedding dress. 1072 01:04:43,512 --> 01:04:45,914 She wore it. 1073 01:04:47,650 --> 01:04:49,618 You know, she liked little boys. 1074 01:04:49,620 --> 01:04:54,956 She couldn't help herself. 1075 01:05:00,630 --> 01:05:02,197 Neither can I. 1076 01:05:40,069 --> 01:05:42,604 Well, well, well, Mr. Jeremy. 1077 01:05:42,606 --> 01:05:45,307 I love watching you swallow. 1078 01:05:45,309 --> 01:05:47,375 What's going on up there? 1079 01:05:47,377 --> 01:05:50,045 Just a porn star choking the chicken. 1080 01:06:03,259 --> 01:06:06,494 For god's sakes, what's that fucking yeti doing here? 1081 01:06:13,135 --> 01:06:14,970 How does he stand the heat at night? 1082 01:06:14,972 --> 01:06:17,439 Those pecs are like steamed vegetables. 1083 01:06:33,622 --> 01:06:36,591 Kosta! Hi! This is my friend, kosta. 1084 01:06:36,593 --> 01:06:38,326 Everybody meet kosta. 1085 01:06:38,328 --> 01:06:40,028 Kosta meet everybody. 1086 01:06:45,634 --> 01:06:49,571 Hey, kosta, you ever give a little kid a used condom, 1087 01:06:49,573 --> 01:06:51,139 and tell him it was a go-gurt. 1088 01:06:51,141 --> 01:06:52,140 Oh! 1089 01:06:52,142 --> 01:06:53,441 Seems a little fucked up. 1090 01:06:53,443 --> 01:06:56,344 -That is fucked up. -Oh, excuse me. 1091 01:06:56,346 --> 01:06:59,481 Aren't you standing tip toe on your high horse today! 1092 01:07:00,449 --> 01:07:04,285 Seems a little disrespectful. 1093 01:07:04,287 --> 01:07:07,789 This from a guy who rationalizes having sex with minors, 1094 01:07:07,791 --> 01:07:10,458 by bragging you have the highest test scores in the state! 1095 01:07:10,460 --> 01:07:12,193 Like that's gonna justify it. 1096 01:07:12,195 --> 01:07:14,062 Hey, you gotta admit those 'cause they're limping off 1097 01:07:14,064 --> 01:07:16,231 -to a brighter future. -That's why I love you, potsie. 1098 01:07:16,233 --> 01:07:18,666 Come here, you slime ball. Let's have a private moment, 1099 01:07:18,668 --> 01:07:19,801 come here, come here. 1100 01:07:19,803 --> 01:07:22,437 Oh, yes, yes, yes! 1101 01:07:22,439 --> 01:07:24,139 You're not a bad guy, you need a black hat. 1102 01:07:24,141 --> 01:07:25,240 You need some love. 1103 01:07:27,810 --> 01:07:30,745 Kosta, what do you think of the girls you got here? 1104 01:07:30,747 --> 01:07:32,814 -Fucking girls. -Pretty sexy, huh? 1105 01:07:32,816 --> 01:07:34,516 -Oh, that-- -yeah, I'd love to-- 1106 01:07:34,518 --> 01:07:36,751 I mean, no, no, my penis is like kix. 1107 01:07:36,753 --> 01:07:38,753 Kid tested mother approved. 1108 01:07:38,755 --> 01:07:41,489 -Oh, it is, it's mother approved. -And he's right it is. 1109 01:07:41,491 --> 01:07:43,091 -Faster, you're getting soft. -My mother approved. 1110 01:07:43,093 --> 01:07:44,659 -You're getting soft. In fact-- -maybe too soft. 1111 01:07:44,661 --> 01:07:47,195 -I think a little too soft. -Maybe. 1112 01:07:53,636 --> 01:07:56,404 They all have masks. 1113 01:07:56,406 --> 01:07:58,406 Check this out. 1114 01:08:00,576 --> 01:08:02,811 You're getting soft, kosta. 1115 01:08:02,813 --> 01:08:05,380 Perhaps a little too soft. 1116 01:08:08,551 --> 01:08:10,618 Ah! Oh, my god. 1117 01:08:10,620 --> 01:08:12,487 You know, we have a strong policy about intruders here. 1118 01:08:12,489 --> 01:08:14,856 You picked the wrong party to crash. 1119 01:08:14,858 --> 01:08:16,791 Hold him, Ron. I'll get the gun. 1120 01:08:16,793 --> 01:08:19,360 Well, make it quick. I wanna keep this festive. 1121 01:08:19,362 --> 01:08:20,662 Yeah, right. 1122 01:08:20,664 --> 01:08:22,864 Cut it out! Just lie there, will ya? 1123 01:08:22,866 --> 01:08:24,365 Now who are you? 1124 01:08:24,367 --> 01:08:26,101 -I'm kosta. -You're not kosta! 1125 01:08:26,103 --> 01:08:27,769 I'm looking at your face, you idiot. 1126 01:08:27,771 --> 01:08:29,370 What brings you to this party? 1127 01:08:29,372 --> 01:08:30,572 Why are you here? 1128 01:08:32,608 --> 01:08:34,342 Oh, no, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. 1129 01:08:34,344 --> 01:08:35,810 No, no, no, no, no, no. 1130 01:08:35,812 --> 01:08:37,879 Who's this? 1131 01:08:41,117 --> 01:08:43,685 Is this miracle lamentations of love? 1132 01:08:43,687 --> 01:08:49,524 Miracle lamentations of love. 1133 01:08:49,526 --> 01:08:54,262 Oh! It's Eric, baby, hi. 1134 01:08:54,264 --> 01:08:55,463 I know. 1135 01:08:55,465 --> 01:08:57,899 I wanna-- i wanna talk to him. 1136 01:08:57,901 --> 01:09:01,703 Hi, I have a big cock and I like to get a nice ball suck massage. 1137 01:09:01,705 --> 01:09:04,472 Look, I'm sitting here, my penis is out parking the car. 1138 01:09:06,375 --> 01:09:09,444 The eagle society secret wealthy group 1139 01:09:09,446 --> 01:09:13,882 of prominent homosexual men with mommy issues, 1140 01:09:13,884 --> 01:09:16,618 often blaming the infidelities of their mothers 1141 01:09:16,620 --> 01:09:19,220 as the root of their unhappiness. 1142 01:09:19,222 --> 01:09:21,356 It's very encyclopedic. 1143 01:09:21,358 --> 01:09:22,790 Seems too straightforward. 1144 01:09:22,792 --> 01:09:25,860 Like a suppository for a secret book. 1145 01:09:25,862 --> 01:09:27,328 Well, maybe the guys that wrote this thing 1146 01:09:27,330 --> 01:09:28,796 were on a tight deadline. 1147 01:09:28,798 --> 01:09:31,666 So I have a problem with premature ejaculation. 1148 01:09:38,574 --> 01:09:42,210 Hey, why are you giving Ron Jeremy my phone? 1149 01:09:42,212 --> 01:09:43,811 Not that I mind where his hands have been. 1150 01:09:43,813 --> 01:09:46,181 Who cares about the fucking phone? 1151 01:09:46,183 --> 01:09:49,417 Any ideas where my niece is? 1152 01:09:49,419 --> 01:09:52,620 I got an idea. 1153 01:09:56,293 --> 01:09:57,892 Let the games begin. 1154 01:10:01,664 --> 01:10:04,766 Gentlemen, tonight we put an end to the ghost 1155 01:10:04,768 --> 01:10:06,301 of our mothers' judgment. 1156 01:10:07,903 --> 01:10:11,806 No longer will we be judged 1157 01:10:11,808 --> 01:10:13,908 for the choices that we've made. 1158 01:10:13,910 --> 01:10:16,811 Choices that were made that were predetermined 1159 01:10:16,813 --> 01:10:18,913 before we came out of our mother's womb. 1160 01:10:21,383 --> 01:10:23,585 Let the sacrifice begin. 1161 01:10:38,534 --> 01:10:41,970 Dude, you're homosexual, why didn't you tell me? 1162 01:10:41,972 --> 01:10:44,405 You? How could i possibly tell you? 1163 01:10:44,407 --> 01:10:46,541 All you care about is material things, 1164 01:10:46,543 --> 01:10:47,809 how people perceive you. 1165 01:10:47,811 --> 01:10:49,444 How can I be honest with you? 1166 01:10:49,446 --> 01:10:52,547 You're not even honest with yourself, Danny. 1167 01:10:52,549 --> 01:10:53,881 Fucker. 1168 01:10:58,020 --> 01:11:02,390 You know, Sonny, you've always been 1169 01:11:02,392 --> 01:11:04,292 a disappointment to me. 1170 01:11:04,294 --> 01:11:06,995 I expect that from sons who wet the bed 1171 01:11:06,997 --> 01:11:08,963 until age 15. 1172 01:11:08,965 --> 01:11:11,399 If your mothers could see you now. 1173 01:11:11,401 --> 01:11:14,435 Oh, yes, they can. 1174 01:11:14,437 --> 01:11:18,439 You should always carry a piece of your mother in your heart. 1175 01:11:18,441 --> 01:11:21,442 It's picture school day and you're not even dressed 1176 01:11:21,444 --> 01:11:22,677 to impress. 1177 01:11:22,679 --> 01:11:24,412 You better smile, you-- 1178 01:11:24,414 --> 01:11:25,613 oh, fuck! 1179 01:11:27,016 --> 01:11:29,350 Get over there. 1180 01:11:29,352 --> 01:11:31,319 Everybody back the fuck off 1181 01:11:31,321 --> 01:11:33,454 or you're gonna get an ass full of lead. 1182 01:11:33,456 --> 01:11:36,724 And to clarify, this is a deadly weapon. 1183 01:11:36,726 --> 01:11:38,393 I'm not talking about any kind 1184 01:11:38,395 --> 01:11:39,927 of kinky stuff. 1185 01:11:43,032 --> 01:11:45,900 What did you do with my mistress? 1186 01:11:45,902 --> 01:11:50,872 You can say she's waking up to some harsh realities. 1187 01:11:57,614 --> 01:11:59,480 Nah, this is my favorite one. 1188 01:11:59,482 --> 01:12:01,349 Got it from a blind guy. 1189 01:12:01,351 --> 01:12:02,950 That's an apple, you idiot. 1190 01:12:02,952 --> 01:12:06,020 Oh, yeah, did you hear me just mention that he's blind? 1191 01:12:06,022 --> 01:12:08,022 God, for a mistress of the secret society, 1192 01:12:08,024 --> 01:12:11,426 you're a fucking stupid whore. 1193 01:12:11,428 --> 01:12:13,394 You know, if this doesn't work out, Mrs. Hanks, 1194 01:12:13,396 --> 01:12:15,763 -maybe you and-- -save your words, kosta, 1195 01:12:15,765 --> 01:12:18,333 a person like me would never sleep with a troll like you. 1196 01:12:18,335 --> 01:12:19,701 No, no, no, no, no, 1197 01:12:19,703 --> 01:12:21,536 that's not what I was talking about, my dear. 1198 01:12:21,538 --> 01:12:23,104 I was talking about a teaching reference 1199 01:12:23,106 --> 01:12:26,441 for an elementary school, you're 35 years too old for me. 1200 01:12:26,443 --> 01:12:28,843 I am 42. 1201 01:12:28,845 --> 01:12:31,079 Exactly. 1202 01:12:31,081 --> 01:12:32,547 Can I jerk off on your tits? 1203 01:12:32,549 --> 01:12:33,581 No! 1204 01:12:33,583 --> 01:12:37,919 I was talking to him. 1205 01:12:37,921 --> 01:12:40,555 I can pay you in rubber penises. 1206 01:12:40,557 --> 01:12:43,124 -Absolutely. -Nice. 1207 01:12:43,126 --> 01:12:46,794 The oakwood community can all sleep a little easier now 1208 01:12:46,796 --> 01:12:48,930 thanks to three men, that choose to only 1209 01:12:48,932 --> 01:12:51,132 be referred to as the power triangle, 1210 01:12:51,134 --> 01:12:53,901 a young woman was rescued from captivity. 1211 01:12:53,903 --> 01:12:57,038 The perpetrators, oakwood high school principal, 1212 01:12:57,040 --> 01:13:00,375 Steven Hanks, and his wife, psychologist, Monica Hanks, 1213 01:13:00,377 --> 01:13:02,143 are being held for questioning. 1214 01:13:02,145 --> 01:13:05,113 Once again, it's seems as though good has prevailed. 1215 01:13:05,115 --> 01:13:06,848 We'll be here bringing you up to the date coverage 1216 01:13:06,850 --> 01:13:08,916 as soon as it becomes available. 1217 01:13:08,918 --> 01:13:12,920 This is Sofia Briley signing off for oakwood news, channel three. 1218 01:13:15,524 --> 01:13:19,861 -Hey guys, you did it. -No, we did it. 1219 01:13:19,863 --> 01:13:22,897 And now that I'm 18, we're gonna do it. 1220 01:13:23,799 --> 01:13:25,533 That's my boy. 1221 01:13:26,468 --> 01:13:28,703 Hey, where's Ross? 1222 01:13:28,705 --> 01:13:30,138 Well, the busy buddy couldn't make it. 1223 01:13:30,140 --> 01:13:32,974 He's too busy doing R&D on a new lobster sandwich. 1224 01:13:32,976 --> 01:13:37,412 Hey, guys, congratulations, we did it. 1225 01:13:40,716 --> 01:13:43,451 Guys, I just gotta say something, 1226 01:13:43,453 --> 01:13:47,655 if ajay wasn't gay, I'd be dead right now, 1227 01:13:47,657 --> 01:13:50,024 and for that, I'm forever grateful 1228 01:13:50,026 --> 01:13:51,759 to his homosexuality. 1229 01:13:54,930 --> 01:13:56,898 I've got a surprise for you. 1230 01:14:12,548 --> 01:14:14,182 Ajay, I have never been more proud of you 1231 01:14:14,184 --> 01:14:16,884 than I am in this moment. 1232 01:14:16,886 --> 01:14:18,853 Thanks, dad. 1233 01:14:18,855 --> 01:14:20,822 I can't wait to gossip with you and catch up 1234 01:14:20,824 --> 01:14:22,223 on the soap operas. 1235 01:14:22,225 --> 01:14:26,494 Anyway, listen, drinks on the power triangle. 1236 01:14:26,496 --> 01:14:28,062 Cheers. 1237 01:14:29,164 --> 01:14:32,233 Hold on, power triangle? 1238 01:14:32,235 --> 01:14:33,501 I don't have any money. 1239 01:14:33,503 --> 01:14:35,636 It's all right, trust me, 1240 01:14:35,638 --> 01:14:37,004 I've got something to show you guys. 1241 01:14:37,006 --> 01:14:38,506 Let's go check it out. 1242 01:14:39,241 --> 01:14:40,975 Come on. 1243 01:14:47,182 --> 01:14:48,883 Take a look. 1244 01:14:51,687 --> 01:14:53,754 This is amazing, Tyler, thank you. 1245 01:14:54,723 --> 01:14:56,491 Can I redesign the interior? 1246 01:14:56,493 --> 01:14:57,992 Of course, it's yours. 1247 01:14:59,595 --> 01:15:01,929 All right, guys, on the count to three 1248 01:15:01,931 --> 01:15:02,964 let's do a power triangle. 1249 01:15:02,966 --> 01:15:04,799 Let's do it. 1250 01:15:04,801 --> 01:15:07,935 -One, two-- -whoa, whoa, whoa, wait! 1251 01:15:07,937 --> 01:15:10,705 Always treat Jessica like a Princess. 1252 01:15:10,707 --> 01:15:12,173 I will. 1253 01:15:12,175 --> 01:15:14,208 -Three-- -power triangle! 1254 01:15:15,811 --> 01:15:17,278 Hey, hey, hey. 1255 01:15:19,748 --> 01:15:22,216 -Hey. -Hey, that's mine. 1256 01:15:22,218 --> 01:15:23,618 Shut up. 1257 01:15:23,620 --> 01:15:26,187 That's mine! You can't take that! 1258 01:15:30,059 --> 01:15:32,159 -Knock it off. -No, I fight back. 1259 01:15:35,564 --> 01:15:37,899 -Grab his legs. -Got it. 1260 01:15:37,901 --> 01:15:39,834 Oh, this guy. 1261 01:15:46,775 --> 01:15:48,609 Good thing.