1
00:00:02,869 --> 00:00:05,651
Damn! Wha... so he's dead, right?

2
00:00:05,676 --> 00:00:07,376
No, he's the lead. He can't be dead.

3
00:00:07,378 --> 00:00:09,121
Right?

4
00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:12,591
_

5
00:00:14,585 --> 00:00:16,351
Hey, I thought you wanted to, you know,

6
00:00:16,376 --> 00:00:17,806
Netflix and chill tonight.

7
00:00:17,831 --> 00:00:19,547
Ye... babe.

8
00:00:20,229 --> 00:00:21,683
You know that means sex, right?

9
00:00:22,921 --> 00:00:24,727
- We shouldn't tonight.
- What?

10
00:00:25,039 --> 00:00:26,138
Why not?

11
00:00:26,163 --> 00:00:28,075
I just don't think it's a good idea.

12
00:00:28,100 --> 00:00:30,034
Period.

13
00:00:30,451 --> 00:00:31,853
Oh.

14
00:00:31,878 --> 00:00:33,745
Wa... It's not a problem.

15
00:00:33,770 --> 00:00:35,948
You know, I have a designated towel

16
00:00:35,973 --> 00:00:37,787
for these occasions.

17
00:00:37,812 --> 00:00:39,393
It has, like,
a really busy pattern on it, so...

18
00:00:39,418 --> 00:00:40,850
- Hey, hey.
- What?

19
00:00:40,874 --> 00:00:42,840
Just give me a couple days, okay?

20
00:00:42,865 --> 00:00:44,982
Yeah.

21
00:00:45,007 --> 00:00:46,328
I get it.

22
00:00:47,010 --> 00:00:48,209
It's like a...

23
00:00:48,234 --> 00:00:50,978
generational thing, you know?

24
00:01:00,324 --> 00:01:03,935
- Synced and corrected by martythecrazy -
- www.addic7ed.com -

25
00:01:04,243 --> 00:01:06,450
You know, maybe it is
a generational thing.

26
00:01:06,475 --> 00:01:08,805
David was just always so weird about it.

27
00:01:08,830 --> 00:01:10,591
Oh, I bet he'd send you into the woods

28
00:01:10,616 --> 00:01:11,922
until the end of your moon.

29
00:01:11,947 --> 00:01:13,403
You've never had period sex?

30
00:01:13,428 --> 00:01:15,161
Not on purpose. Have you?

31
00:01:15,186 --> 00:01:17,265
Well, if you're a lesbian,
you have to go with the flow,

32
00:01:17,290 --> 00:01:18,964
otherwise you're celibate
for half the month.

33
00:01:18,989 --> 00:01:20,070
Oh, I never thought about that.

34
00:01:20,095 --> 00:01:21,219
And you don't even want to see

35
00:01:21,244 --> 00:01:22,367
when I sync up with a girlfriend.

36
00:01:22,392 --> 00:01:24,168
My bed looks like a crime scene.

37
00:01:24,194 --> 00:01:25,095
Thanks for the warning.

38
00:01:25,120 --> 00:01:26,666
Hey, we've finally
synced up, haven't we?

39
00:01:26,691 --> 00:01:28,378
Yeah! Happy day two.

40
00:01:45,553 --> 00:01:46,456
Wha...

41
00:01:55,929 --> 00:01:57,739
What the hell is going on in here?

42
00:01:57,764 --> 00:01:58,677
Sorry.

43
00:01:58,702 --> 00:01:59,727
No, you're not.

44
00:01:59,920 --> 00:02:01,619
City ordinances clearly state

45
00:02:01,644 --> 00:02:03,942
you cannot begin
construction before 8:00 a.m.

46
00:02:03,967 --> 00:02:06,318
It is 7:53, and it sounds
like a drone strike in here.

47
00:02:06,343 --> 00:02:08,005
So tell me why I shouldn't
call the co-op president

48
00:02:08,030 --> 00:02:08,960
right this very second.

49
00:02:08,985 --> 00:02:10,836
Honey, unless you woke up

50
00:02:10,861 --> 00:02:12,157
spackled and pressed like that,

51
00:02:12,182 --> 00:02:14,110
you've been at work for a while too.

52
00:02:14,135 --> 00:02:15,167
"Spackled"?

53
00:02:15,192 --> 00:02:16,089
No, it looks good.

54
00:02:16,257 --> 00:02:17,457
I won't tell on you.

55
00:02:17,482 --> 00:02:19,626
Listen, we got a deadline to hit.

56
00:02:19,651 --> 00:02:21,519
The guys got here early,
so I had them get started.

57
00:02:21,544 --> 00:02:22,846
Well, have them get stopped

58
00:02:22,871 --> 00:02:24,024
until 8:00 a.m.

59
00:02:26,608 --> 00:02:29,393
Guys. Cut the noise.

60
00:02:41,803 --> 00:02:43,366
What you looking for?

61
00:02:43,391 --> 00:02:46,237
Well, I was looking for my assistant,

62
00:02:46,262 --> 00:02:47,762
but now I'm looking for a sweetener

63
00:02:47,787 --> 00:02:48,652
that won't give me cancer.

64
00:02:48,677 --> 00:02:49,637
Oh, I'm sorry.

65
00:02:49,662 --> 00:02:51,266
I stopped at the tailor on my way in

66
00:02:51,291 --> 00:02:52,893
to check on your gown for the opera.

67
00:02:52,918 --> 00:02:56,686
Oh, and Feliciano is all set
to do your hair that night.

68
00:02:56,711 --> 00:02:58,497
Do I need to do anything for your date?

69
00:02:58,523 --> 00:02:59,555
Do you know who you're bringing yet?

70
00:02:59,580 --> 00:03:01,059
Still TBD, Liza.

71
00:03:01,084 --> 00:03:02,818
Diana. I was looking for you.

72
00:03:02,843 --> 00:03:03,660
Oh?

73
00:03:03,685 --> 00:03:06,301
Bryce is going to sit
in on this morning's

74
00:03:06,326 --> 00:03:07,786
- staff meeting.
- Oh.

75
00:03:07,811 --> 00:03:09,277
We just need to indulge him a little.

76
00:03:09,302 --> 00:03:10,846
Listen to his ideas.

77
00:03:11,067 --> 00:03:12,656
Keep an open mind.

78
00:03:12,681 --> 00:03:14,177
Of course.

79
00:03:22,426 --> 00:03:25,703
"P is for Pigeon,"
our lead title this season,

80
00:03:25,728 --> 00:03:28,224
is just weeks away from launching.

81
00:03:28,271 --> 00:03:32,040
It is the story of the
world's last passenger pigeon

82
00:03:32,065 --> 00:03:34,872
and a powerful meditation on the...

83
00:03:34,897 --> 00:03:37,462
extinction of the American middle class.

84
00:03:37,487 --> 00:03:39,091
How are the preorders so far?

85
00:03:39,118 --> 00:03:40,958
Slightly lower than we'd hoped,

86
00:03:40,983 --> 00:03:42,881
but 5,000 should put us on the
"Times" Best Seller list,

87
00:03:42,906 --> 00:03:44,547
and that is definitely within reach.

88
00:03:44,572 --> 00:03:47,329
I have put a call in
to the Audubon Society

89
00:03:47,354 --> 00:03:49,864
for a bird-watching and
reading doubleheader

90
00:03:49,889 --> 00:03:51,221
at The Cloisters.

91
00:03:51,246 --> 00:03:53,667
Got it. Can Millennial discuss their IP?

92
00:03:53,814 --> 00:03:55,846
We are planning a college tour

93
00:03:55,871 --> 00:03:57,024
for "The Deciding Decade."

94
00:03:57,049 --> 00:03:57,844
And?

95
00:03:57,869 --> 00:04:00,588
And, uh, we really want to
find the next Warsan Shire.

96
00:04:00,868 --> 00:04:02,480
Nobody's breaking poets right now,

97
00:04:02,505 --> 00:04:04,558
except Beyoncé. Dead end.

98
00:04:05,497 --> 00:04:06,703
There.

99
00:04:06,728 --> 00:04:08,082
Your next authors.

100
00:04:08,106 --> 00:04:09,606
What's up? I'm Kray.

101
00:04:09,631 --> 00:04:11,070
And I'm Tay.

102
00:04:11,094 --> 00:04:13,289
- And we're...
- The Stoopid Girls!

103
00:04:15,146 --> 00:04:16,234
- Tay.
- Hey?

104
00:04:16,259 --> 00:04:17,686
Are you wearing an adult diaper?

105
00:04:17,711 --> 00:04:20,164
Uhh... yeah, I am!

106
00:04:20,189 --> 00:04:21,437
Wait, so are you.

107
00:04:21,462 --> 00:04:22,862
Oh, my God!

108
00:04:23,113 --> 00:04:26,058
Chonie chug challenge!

109
00:04:26,083 --> 00:04:28,150
First one to leak through their Depends

110
00:04:28,175 --> 00:04:29,808
is the winner.

111
00:04:29,833 --> 00:04:31,620
- Chugs.
- Chugs, mm-mm.

112
00:04:31,645 --> 00:04:33,453
Okay, here I go.

113
00:04:35,969 --> 00:04:37,768
There's another 14 minutes of this?

114
00:04:37,793 --> 00:04:39,104
I can scrub through to the end

115
00:04:39,129 --> 00:04:40,161
if you want to see who wins.

116
00:04:40,186 --> 00:04:41,783
I'm not sure this is

117
00:04:41,808 --> 00:04:43,418
on brand for us.

118
00:04:43,443 --> 00:04:45,262
Great books come from great ideas.

119
00:04:45,380 --> 00:04:47,314
We shouldn't be precious
about the source.

120
00:04:47,339 --> 00:04:49,212
And what ideas do these girls in...

121
00:04:49,237 --> 00:04:50,772
diapers have?

122
00:04:50,797 --> 00:04:52,833
They have 5 million subscribers.

123
00:04:52,858 --> 00:04:55,264
If even 1/100 of a percent
of them buys the book,

124
00:04:55,289 --> 00:04:56,696
they're on the "Times" Best Seller list.

125
00:04:56,721 --> 00:04:58,059
Right?

126
00:04:58,464 --> 00:05:01,247
That is their manager's contact.

127
00:05:01,557 --> 00:05:03,473
I hate talking on the
phone. What's wrong?

128
00:05:03,498 --> 00:05:05,956
Comment below if you've ever puked.

129
00:05:09,687 --> 00:05:12,009
Could The Stoopid Girls
really write a book?

130
00:05:12,034 --> 00:05:13,550
I mean, would they even want to?

131
00:05:13,575 --> 00:05:15,954
To make that much money being stupid,

132
00:05:15,980 --> 00:05:18,149
you have to be at least a
little bit smart, right?

133
00:05:18,174 --> 00:05:20,007
Yes, exactly, and if
they're thirsty enough

134
00:05:20,032 --> 00:05:22,098
to make 187 videos this year,
they'll be down

135
00:05:22,123 --> 00:05:23,647
for any platform that
feeds them more attention.

136
00:05:23,672 --> 00:05:25,954
Snap 'em now while they're
still just Internet famous.

137
00:05:25,979 --> 00:05:27,485
Oh, we emailed their manager.

138
00:05:27,510 --> 00:05:28,923
We just haven't heard back yet.

139
00:05:28,948 --> 00:05:30,822
Oh, they're probably just
busy prepping for VidPop.

140
00:05:30,847 --> 00:05:32,143
- VidPop?
- Mm-hmm.

141
00:05:32,168 --> 00:05:33,167
It's a YouTuber convention

142
00:05:33,192 --> 00:05:34,656
at the Javits Center this week.

143
00:05:34,681 --> 00:05:36,080
There's a YouTuber convention?

144
00:05:36,105 --> 00:05:37,675
No, there are dozens of them,

145
00:05:37,700 --> 00:05:39,233
and they're insanely popular.

146
00:05:39,258 --> 00:05:41,474
I had to promise the firstborn
I'm never having to get

147
00:05:41,499 --> 00:05:42,929
Hector and Dorff to be
the official jockstrap

148
00:05:42,954 --> 00:05:44,544
of the VidPop gift bags.

149
00:05:44,569 --> 00:05:46,074
Ugh. I'll get you passes.

150
00:05:46,100 --> 00:05:47,152
Great.

151
00:05:49,215 --> 00:05:51,343
Did we have to come

152
00:05:51,368 --> 00:05:53,030
this close to Beth Israel to meet Max?

153
00:05:53,055 --> 00:05:54,685
And did we have to come here?

154
00:05:54,710 --> 00:05:56,213
I told you, with a doctor,
you got to take it

155
00:05:56,238 --> 00:05:57,737
whenever and however you can get it.

156
00:05:57,762 --> 00:05:58,888
You know, whether it's sex

157
00:05:58,913 --> 00:06:00,977
or a tequila-lime chicken finger.

158
00:06:01,002 --> 00:06:02,600
We've hooked up in the on-call room

159
00:06:02,624 --> 00:06:03,590
three times this week.

160
00:06:03,615 --> 00:06:04,492
Lucky you.

161
00:06:04,517 --> 00:06:06,117
So anytime,

162
00:06:06,142 --> 00:06:07,468
anywhere?

163
00:06:07,493 --> 00:06:08,588
What if you're...

164
00:06:08,613 --> 00:06:10,295
you know...

165
00:06:10,529 --> 00:06:12,607
having your period?

166
00:06:12,632 --> 00:06:14,826
Why'd you whisper that?

167
00:06:14,851 --> 00:06:15,828
I don't know... I'm just a...

168
00:06:15,853 --> 00:06:17,799
I'm just asking a follow-up question,
never mind.

169
00:06:17,824 --> 00:06:19,428
No, no, no. It hasn't come up yet.

170
00:06:19,453 --> 00:06:21,082
But the only thing I
don't do on my period

171
00:06:21,107 --> 00:06:22,307
is a yoga inversion.

172
00:06:22,331 --> 00:06:23,889
So everything else is on the table?

173
00:06:23,915 --> 00:06:26,619
Wait, is Josh anti-period sex?

174
00:06:26,644 --> 00:06:28,548
No, that's offensive.

175
00:06:28,573 --> 00:06:29,967
I thought he was so woke.

176
00:06:29,992 --> 00:06:31,063
No, he is.

177
00:06:31,087 --> 00:06:32,479
He... wait, what's woke?

178
00:06:32,504 --> 00:06:34,016
Enlightened, i.e., he's not

179
00:06:34,041 --> 00:06:35,314
terrified of the female body.

180
00:06:35,339 --> 00:06:37,266
Oh, ah, you know what?
There's Max; let's ask him.

181
00:06:37,290 --> 00:06:39,743
No, no-no-no-no-no-no.

182
00:06:39,822 --> 00:06:41,183
- Hey.
- Hi.

183
00:06:41,208 --> 00:06:42,495
Hey, uh, Max, this is my friend Liza.

184
00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:44,200
- And you remember Kelsey.
- Hey, again.

185
00:06:44,225 --> 00:06:45,454
- Nice to meet you, Liza.
- Hey.

186
00:06:45,479 --> 00:06:46,691
Um, honey, quick question.

187
00:06:46,717 --> 00:06:48,068
You're cool with period sex right?

188
00:06:48,092 --> 00:06:49,316
Yeah.

189
00:06:49,341 --> 00:06:50,571
I knew it.

190
00:06:50,596 --> 00:06:52,397
Oh, shit, it's me.

191
00:06:52,422 --> 00:06:54,169
I got to get back.

192
00:06:54,194 --> 00:06:56,032
My attending's letting
me do the episiotomy

193
00:06:56,057 --> 00:06:58,245
on a tiny woman having
a huge baby, so...

194
00:06:58,270 --> 00:06:59,944
- Bye.
- Bye.

195
00:07:00,722 --> 00:07:03,324
So? What do you guys think?

196
00:07:03,349 --> 00:07:04,658
Oh.

197
00:07:04,683 --> 00:07:06,586
- He seems really nice.
- Yeah.

198
00:07:06,612 --> 00:07:08,296
He... uh, he was super cute.

199
00:07:09,014 --> 00:07:10,208
Nice handshake.

200
00:07:10,336 --> 00:07:11,782
You know, it says a lot.

201
00:07:11,807 --> 00:07:12,776
It does, it does.

202
00:07:12,801 --> 00:07:14,315
Oh, I'm so glad you guys get him.

203
00:07:25,888 --> 00:07:28,480
God damn it!

204
00:07:28,783 --> 00:07:31,265
You are at least 45 minutes

205
00:07:31,290 --> 00:07:33,172
past the legal cutoff
time to be working.

206
00:07:33,197 --> 00:07:34,463
It's not even that late.

207
00:07:34,488 --> 00:07:36,940
I read 15 books a week for work.

208
00:07:36,965 --> 00:07:38,570
That is impossible to do with you

209
00:07:38,594 --> 00:07:40,566
jackhammering away over here.

210
00:07:40,591 --> 00:07:42,165
Do you even know what a jackhammer is?

211
00:07:42,190 --> 00:07:44,215
- I'm gonna call the board.
- All right, slow down.

212
00:07:44,240 --> 00:07:45,846
No, I don't need to slow down.

213
00:07:45,871 --> 00:07:47,576
What I need is peace.

214
00:07:47,601 --> 00:07:49,437
What I need is privacy.

215
00:07:49,463 --> 00:07:50,325
What I... Honey.

216
00:07:50,349 --> 00:07:51,617
What you need

217
00:07:51,643 --> 00:07:53,172
is to get fucked.

218
00:07:59,949 --> 00:08:01,687
Go, go, that way, that way.

219
00:08:18,522 --> 00:08:21,130
Okay, I have never
felt so old in my life.

220
00:08:21,155 --> 00:08:22,321
Ah... me neither.

221
00:08:22,346 --> 00:08:24,405
Okay, The Stoopid Girls
are on in an hour.

222
00:08:24,430 --> 00:08:26,864
Ugh, but maybe somebody else
has a book you could sell?

223
00:08:26,889 --> 00:08:29,290
Oh, God, I hope not.

224
00:08:30,465 --> 00:08:32,147
- All right, come on, let's go.
- Yeah.

225
00:08:38,284 --> 00:08:39,474
Hey, guys!

226
00:08:39,499 --> 00:08:41,010
My name is Soy Random

227
00:08:41,035 --> 00:08:42,079
because I'm...

228
00:08:42,104 --> 00:08:44,656
- Soy random!
- Yeah!

229
00:08:44,681 --> 00:08:47,679
I've been eating way too
many gluten-free cupcakes

230
00:08:47,704 --> 00:08:50,256
so I made this exercise
bike to mix them up

231
00:08:50,281 --> 00:08:52,347
so I don't feel bad
about eating all of them!

232
00:08:53,569 --> 00:08:55,658
Oh, my God, she's Soy Random.

233
00:08:57,963 --> 00:09:00,250
All right, anything can be hacked.

234
00:09:00,275 --> 00:09:03,239
If you just use your brain, okay?

235
00:09:03,264 --> 00:09:04,172
Anything.

236
00:09:04,197 --> 00:09:05,483
I couldn't get a date

237
00:09:05,508 --> 00:09:06,947
until I figured out how to hack

238
00:09:06,972 --> 00:09:09,565
the vagina! Am I right?

239
00:09:09,590 --> 00:09:10,623
Ladies,

240
00:09:10,648 --> 00:09:12,898
watch at your own risk.

241
00:09:12,923 --> 00:09:14,666
Uh!

242
00:09:19,019 --> 00:09:20,954
Hey, y'all.

243
00:09:20,979 --> 00:09:23,639
- We're the...
- Stoopid Girls!

244
00:09:26,105 --> 00:09:27,485
- Ew.
- Gross.

245
00:09:27,510 --> 00:09:29,095
Who wants to poke

246
00:09:29,120 --> 00:09:30,772
the Dare Bear?

247
00:09:30,797 --> 00:09:32,023
Me! Me!

248
00:09:32,048 --> 00:09:33,234
Oh?

249
00:09:33,259 --> 00:09:35,092
Hey, look at this.

250
00:09:35,117 --> 00:09:38,306
Noob1993 dares me to wax off

251
00:09:38,331 --> 00:09:40,682
one of my eyebrows.

252
00:09:40,707 --> 00:09:42,960
- That's so stupid!
- So stupid!

253
00:09:42,985 --> 00:09:46,176
- Oh, yeah.
- Do me up, Tay!

254
00:09:46,201 --> 00:09:47,766
Waxing it on.

255
00:09:47,791 --> 00:09:49,219
Wax it on.

256
00:09:49,244 --> 00:09:50,963
Wax it off.

257
00:09:52,585 --> 00:09:53,684
Should I do it?

258
00:09:53,709 --> 00:09:54,666
Come on!

259
00:09:54,691 --> 00:09:55,684
Three.

260
00:09:56,148 --> 00:09:57,548
Two.

261
00:09:57,573 --> 00:09:58,867
One!

262
00:10:01,066 --> 00:10:03,013
Yeah!

263
00:10:03,038 --> 00:10:05,740
That was so stupid!

264
00:10:08,848 --> 00:10:11,194
They're gonna save the
publishing industry?

265
00:10:11,219 --> 00:10:12,986
Ah... Ah...

266
00:10:15,049 --> 00:10:16,590
Oh, yeah!

267
00:10:16,765 --> 00:10:19,368
I wonder if Bryce would
be into a lifehacker book,

268
00:10:19,393 --> 00:10:20,357
but, like,

269
00:10:20,608 --> 00:10:21,795
like a sexy one?

270
00:10:21,820 --> 00:10:22,701
I don't think you should let

271
00:10:22,726 --> 00:10:24,973
anyone who calls themselves a lifehacker

272
00:10:24,998 --> 00:10:26,493
anywhere near your coin purse.

273
00:10:26,518 --> 00:10:28,052
Oh, ooh. Guys, we're up, we're up.

274
00:10:28,077 --> 00:10:30,207
- Come on, move it along.
- Yeah, go, go. Go, go, go.

275
00:10:30,233 --> 00:10:31,497
Hey, dummies.

276
00:10:31,522 --> 00:10:32,924
Hi. I'm Liza,

277
00:10:32,949 --> 00:10:34,371
- and this is Kelsey...
- Hey.

278
00:10:34,396 --> 00:10:35,934
And we're from Millennial Print.

279
00:10:35,959 --> 00:10:38,369
We'd love to talk to
you about doing a book.

280
00:10:38,394 --> 00:10:39,571
- Really?
- But...

281
00:10:39,596 --> 00:10:42,360
how can I write a book if I
never learned how to read?

282
00:10:42,385 --> 00:10:43,957
Wait, where'd you say
you guys were from?

283
00:10:43,982 --> 00:10:47,310
Millennial, it's a imprint
with Empirical Publishing.

284
00:10:47,335 --> 00:10:49,964
Bah! Big words hurt my brain stub.

285
00:10:49,989 --> 00:10:52,023
- Picture time!
- Whoo!

286
00:10:52,048 --> 00:10:53,433
- Whoo!
- Oh.

287
00:10:53,458 --> 00:10:55,124
- Ha-ha.
- Yay. Okay.

288
00:10:55,149 --> 00:10:56,791
- Oh.
- All right, let's go.

289
00:10:56,816 --> 00:10:57,542
Uh, do you think you can

290
00:10:57,567 --> 00:10:59,583
center the jockstrap on your...
on your chin?

291
00:10:59,608 --> 00:11:01,609
But then I'm gonna get teabagged

292
00:11:01,634 --> 00:11:04,138
by this big nasty thing.

293
00:11:04,163 --> 00:11:05,955
Yep... no, just so they
can read it on Instagram.

294
00:11:05,980 --> 00:11:08,710
Dude, it's, like,
three grand for social media posts.

295
00:11:08,735 --> 00:11:09,883
My manager will kill me.

296
00:11:09,908 --> 00:11:11,082
Okay, I'm just gonna sneak one.

297
00:11:11,107 --> 00:11:12,862
- Go, take her off.
- Real quick, I'm sneaking one.

298
00:11:12,888 --> 00:11:14,819
- Buh-bye.
- Okay. Bye.

299
00:11:19,082 --> 00:11:20,335
Uh, excuse me?

300
00:11:20,380 --> 00:11:22,784
Uh, you're from Millennial Print, right?

301
00:11:22,809 --> 00:11:24,878
You're... Tay?

302
00:11:24,903 --> 00:11:26,401
Uh, Taylor.

303
00:11:26,839 --> 00:11:29,048
Nice to actually meet you.

304
00:11:29,073 --> 00:11:30,249
Um, look,

305
00:11:30,273 --> 00:11:32,812
I don't know if you would
be into this at all,

306
00:11:32,837 --> 00:11:35,784
but I actually have a novel that
I started when I was at Iowa,

307
00:11:35,809 --> 00:11:36,831
and I just, like, never did...

308
00:11:36,856 --> 00:11:38,255
You went to the Writers' Workshop?

309
00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:39,467
Yeah.

310
00:11:39,492 --> 00:11:42,672
Yeah, um, this whole
Stoopid Girls thing was

311
00:11:42,697 --> 00:11:44,169
supposed to be, like, a goof.

312
00:11:44,194 --> 00:11:47,430
Wow, this is... not
what I was expecting.

313
00:11:47,456 --> 00:11:49,095
I'm so grateful for it,

314
00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:51,037
but I just... I feel
kind of boxed in now.

315
00:11:51,099 --> 00:11:53,732
And my manager says that
dense historical fiction

316
00:11:53,757 --> 00:11:55,916
isn't trending, so for now, I'm stuck

317
00:11:55,941 --> 00:11:56,969
acting like a drunk child

318
00:11:56,993 --> 00:11:59,372
while I pay off the
rest of my student debt.

319
00:11:59,968 --> 00:12:01,400
You know what? Um...

320
00:12:01,425 --> 00:12:04,533
Send me a few chapters of your novel.

321
00:12:04,680 --> 00:12:06,511
I would love to read it.

322
00:12:06,536 --> 00:12:08,213
Oh, my God.

323
00:12:08,239 --> 00:12:09,718
Really?

324
00:12:10,587 --> 00:12:13,310
Thank you so much.
That would mean so much to me.

325
00:12:13,335 --> 00:12:15,326
You have no...

326
00:12:15,351 --> 00:12:18,735
Now slowly back away.

327
00:12:22,038 --> 00:12:24,139
Just... just trust me.

328
00:12:30,193 --> 00:12:32,301
Selfie? Hello.

329
00:12:36,659 --> 00:12:39,361
It's a historical novel about Theodora,

330
00:12:39,386 --> 00:12:41,513
the empress who went
from prostitute to power

331
00:12:41,537 --> 00:12:42,629
during the Byzantine era.

332
00:12:42,655 --> 00:12:44,298
Oh, I think I know a
drag queen by that name.

333
00:12:44,323 --> 00:12:45,215
Very funny.

334
00:12:45,240 --> 00:12:47,636
She's so cute when she
nerds out over books,

335
00:12:47,661 --> 00:12:48,816
- isn't she?
- No.

336
00:12:48,841 --> 00:12:50,377
This is about more than a book.

337
00:12:50,402 --> 00:12:51,929
I mean, if this hits,

338
00:12:51,954 --> 00:12:54,265
she could finally be who she really is

339
00:12:54,290 --> 00:12:55,923
and stop pretending every day.

340
00:12:55,948 --> 00:12:57,516
Oh. Hmm.

341
00:12:59,192 --> 00:13:01,930
Are you going home or you wanna...

342
00:13:01,955 --> 00:13:04,166
- Ugh... I just... I think...
- Oh, all right.

343
00:13:04,191 --> 00:13:05,278
No, it's good, it's good.

344
00:13:05,303 --> 00:13:06,990
I got a full sleeve tattoo
to do in the morning,

345
00:13:07,016 --> 00:13:08,467
so I'm gonna go home and sketch.

346
00:13:08,492 --> 00:13:09,885
Okay.

347
00:13:10,268 --> 00:13:11,487
Good night.

348
00:13:11,512 --> 00:13:12,970
- Good night, ladies.
- Bye.

349
00:13:12,995 --> 00:13:14,107
Good night.

350
00:13:14,132 --> 00:13:17,281
- Girl.
- Ugh, I know.

351
00:13:18,052 --> 00:13:19,336
Am I a prude?

352
00:13:19,361 --> 00:13:20,736
Uh, a little bit.

353
00:13:20,761 --> 00:13:22,480
But, you know, sooner or later,

354
00:13:22,505 --> 00:13:24,531
your desire to get laid is gonna trump

355
00:13:24,556 --> 00:13:26,626
your desire for your awkward modesty.

356
00:13:26,651 --> 00:13:28,091
And you're just gonna go for it.

357
00:13:28,116 --> 00:13:29,274
Yeah?

358
00:13:29,454 --> 00:13:30,720
Probably.

359
00:13:30,944 --> 00:13:32,842
Now, come on. It's our heavy flow day.

360
00:13:32,867 --> 00:13:34,759
I want to get home before
we get mauled by a bear.

361
00:13:34,784 --> 00:13:35,763
Ha!

362
00:13:37,939 --> 00:13:39,385
Excuse me.

363
00:13:40,181 --> 00:13:41,661
It is after 7:00 p.m.

364
00:13:41,686 --> 00:13:43,619
And you know the rules.

365
00:13:43,644 --> 00:13:45,811
You're not gonna get off

366
00:13:45,836 --> 00:13:48,352
so easily this time.

367
00:13:48,377 --> 00:13:51,156
So put down your big tool

368
00:13:51,181 --> 00:13:53,710
and stop all that...

369
00:13:53,978 --> 00:13:55,517
pounding.

370
00:13:55,542 --> 00:13:57,341
You done?

371
00:13:57,366 --> 00:13:59,101
You're liable to

372
00:13:59,126 --> 00:14:01,264
flood the basement?

373
00:14:01,289 --> 00:14:02,704
I don't... know... if that...

374
00:14:10,409 --> 00:14:12,898
- I know.
- Good morning, ladies.

375
00:14:12,923 --> 00:14:13,860
Hi.

376
00:14:14,895 --> 00:14:16,398
She's smiling.

377
00:14:16,423 --> 00:14:18,318
With both rows of teeth.

378
00:14:20,844 --> 00:14:22,106
Oh, no, thank you.

379
00:14:22,131 --> 00:14:24,365
I had one when I came in. Here.

380
00:14:24,390 --> 00:14:26,290
Is there a problem
with the opera tickets?

381
00:14:26,315 --> 00:14:28,114
No. I want you to have them.

382
00:14:28,139 --> 00:14:29,704
Take your boyfriend or...

383
00:14:29,921 --> 00:14:32,151
whatever it is you're doing now,
I can't keep track.

384
00:14:32,176 --> 00:14:33,175
Enjoy the opera.

385
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,232
But your dress?

386
00:14:34,257 --> 00:14:35,465
And Feliciano...

387
00:14:35,490 --> 00:14:36,534
I already called him.

388
00:14:36,559 --> 00:14:37,964
I'm busy tonight. There's some

389
00:14:37,989 --> 00:14:39,856
construction in my building I need to

390
00:14:40,297 --> 00:14:41,977
stay on top of.

391
00:14:42,002 --> 00:14:43,766
- Well, I'd be happy to...
- No, Liza!

392
00:14:43,791 --> 00:14:46,480
This is something I need
to supervise personally.

393
00:14:47,886 --> 00:14:49,518
Enjoy the opera.

394
00:14:56,879 --> 00:14:58,148
Bryce will be here in a minute.

395
00:14:58,173 --> 00:14:59,472
Oh, cool.

396
00:14:59,732 --> 00:15:02,032
- Oh.
- Uh, I'm in the wrong room.

397
00:15:02,057 --> 00:15:04,342
No, no, no. This is Tay... lor.

398
00:15:04,367 --> 00:15:06,096
Uh, you might recognize her

399
00:15:06,122 --> 00:15:07,866
as one half of The Stoopid Girls.

400
00:15:08,320 --> 00:15:10,314
I thought I cancelled that
when I read the chapter.

401
00:15:10,339 --> 00:15:12,729
I'm... I'm supposed to be
on a VR meeting with Venmo.

402
00:15:12,754 --> 00:15:14,557
I'm acquiring Venmo. Don't tell anyone.

403
00:15:14,582 --> 00:15:17,504
Wait, Br... Bryce, why...
why would you cancel the meeting?

404
00:15:17,529 --> 00:15:18,924
The chapter was great.

405
00:15:18,949 --> 00:15:20,188
Great disappointment.

406
00:15:20,213 --> 00:15:22,627
Who wants to read historical
fiction from a Stoopid Girl?

407
00:15:22,652 --> 00:15:24,085
Feminist historical fiction.

408
00:15:24,110 --> 00:15:26,187
I love feminist historical fiction.

409
00:15:26,212 --> 00:15:27,567
Ask Doris Kearns Goodwin.

410
00:15:27,592 --> 00:15:29,402
I have her number. She's
a huge fan of mine.

411
00:15:29,427 --> 00:15:32,419
But she can't do
"smell my finger" like she can.

412
00:15:35,660 --> 00:15:36,903
Are you okay?

413
00:15:36,927 --> 00:15:38,228
Kray and I are starting the

414
00:15:38,254 --> 00:15:40,754
human pincushion
challenge in an hour, so

415
00:15:40,779 --> 00:15:42,345
I may as well get started.

416
00:15:42,370 --> 00:15:44,468
See, now, that's stupid.
That's your brand.

417
00:15:44,493 --> 00:15:45,799
Maybe we can do something with that.

418
00:15:45,824 --> 00:15:48,620
It's for digital, and
MTV already bought it.

419
00:15:48,645 --> 00:15:51,490
Oh, my meeting is at Venmo.

420
00:15:51,831 --> 00:15:53,219
Don't tell anyone.

421
00:15:53,244 --> 00:15:55,896
I am so sorry. Excuse me.

422
00:16:02,517 --> 00:16:03,935
That was very rude.

423
00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:05,041
You tried to game the system.

424
00:16:05,066 --> 00:16:06,345
Clever. I'll give you that.

425
00:16:06,370 --> 00:16:08,148
You wanted a YouTube author.

426
00:16:08,173 --> 00:16:09,439
Liza, relax.

427
00:16:09,464 --> 00:16:11,318
You're an asset, okay? Your job is safe.

428
00:16:11,343 --> 00:16:12,474
Why wouldn't it be?

429
00:16:12,499 --> 00:16:13,852
Because I'm recommending we cut staff

430
00:16:13,877 --> 00:16:15,741
by 45% next quarter.

431
00:16:16,165 --> 00:16:17,898
Not you, just the old people.

432
00:16:17,923 --> 00:16:19,086
Like Diana.

433
00:16:19,111 --> 00:16:20,193
Empirical has to change.

434
00:16:20,218 --> 00:16:21,676
Uh, can you?

435
00:16:22,381 --> 00:16:23,700
Your nostrils are flaring.

436
00:16:23,725 --> 00:16:25,917
I... I should have softened that.

437
00:16:25,942 --> 00:16:26,974
Spectrum.

438
00:16:36,923 --> 00:16:39,316
Babe, am I underdressed?

439
00:16:39,864 --> 00:16:41,148
People are wearing capes.

440
00:16:41,398 --> 00:16:43,688
- That's 'cause she's a vampire.
- Ah.

441
00:16:43,713 --> 00:16:45,622
Is it free?

442
00:16:45,647 --> 00:16:46,888
Yeah, it's a benefit.

443
00:16:46,913 --> 00:16:48,355
Everything's free.

444
00:16:48,380 --> 00:16:50,005
Thanks. Cheers, babe.

445
00:16:52,458 --> 00:16:54,250
They all go to the same plastic surgeon?

446
00:16:54,275 --> 00:16:57,013
'Cause they all look exactly the same.

447
00:16:57,529 --> 00:16:59,081
Inbreeding.

448
00:16:59,106 --> 00:17:01,383
The 1% likes to keep
the bloodlines closed.

449
00:17:01,408 --> 00:17:02,448
Ah.

450
00:17:05,013 --> 00:17:06,605
Wait, isn't that your boss?

451
00:17:08,250 --> 00:17:09,353
Yeah, should we go say hi?

452
00:17:09,378 --> 00:17:10,552
Uh, no. No-no-no.

453
00:17:10,577 --> 00:17:11,974
Uh, he's on a date.

454
00:17:11,999 --> 00:17:14,468
Huh. Good for him.

455
00:17:14,492 --> 00:17:15,499
She's hot.

456
00:17:15,525 --> 00:17:17,544
Actually, I'm gonna go use the restroom.

457
00:17:17,569 --> 00:17:19,312
- I'll meet you inside.
- All right.

458
00:17:26,487 --> 00:17:27,427
Excuse me?

459
00:17:27,842 --> 00:17:29,714
Uh, where is the, uh,

460
00:17:29,739 --> 00:17:31,547
plumber?

461
00:17:31,572 --> 00:17:32,906
Who, Enzo?

462
00:17:32,932 --> 00:17:35,962
He's already moved on to the
next jobsite in Westchester.

463
00:17:35,987 --> 00:17:36,929
What?

464
00:17:36,954 --> 00:17:38,498
Pipe's been laid, ma'am.

465
00:18:06,249 --> 00:18:07,379
Liza.

466
00:18:08,237 --> 00:18:09,755
Charles, hi.

467
00:18:09,780 --> 00:18:11,525
- Hi.
- Wow, um.

468
00:18:11,550 --> 00:18:13,366
I... I didn't know you
were gonna be here.

469
00:18:13,391 --> 00:18:15,136
This is such a surprise.

470
00:18:15,237 --> 00:18:17,170
Diana gave me tickets.

471
00:18:17,888 --> 00:18:19,354
How wonderful.

472
00:18:19,379 --> 00:18:21,161
Do you need a hand with that?

473
00:18:21,186 --> 00:18:22,791
Yes, I do...

474
00:18:22,816 --> 00:18:24,539
Do you mind?

475
00:18:38,853 --> 00:18:40,253
Charles.

476
00:18:40,636 --> 00:18:42,792
Radha. This is, uh,

477
00:18:42,817 --> 00:18:44,908
a colleague of mine. Liza Miller.

478
00:18:44,933 --> 00:18:46,633
Ah, it's lovely to meet you.

479
00:18:46,658 --> 00:18:47,638
Oh, you too.

480
00:18:47,663 --> 00:18:49,733
And what do you do at Empirical?

481
00:18:49,758 --> 00:18:51,132
Oh, I'm just an assistant.

482
00:18:51,157 --> 00:18:52,522
She's being modest.

483
00:18:52,546 --> 00:18:54,838
Liza's co-running our
Millennial imprint.

484
00:18:54,863 --> 00:18:57,812
How did it go today with
those Internet stars?

485
00:18:57,837 --> 00:18:59,114
The Stoopid Girls.

486
00:18:59,139 --> 00:19:01,515
A favor to our new investor,

487
00:19:01,540 --> 00:19:03,707
a young guy in tech.

488
00:19:03,732 --> 00:19:05,964
And Liza's imprint is the

489
00:19:06,053 --> 00:19:09,311
shiny penny that keeps him
interested in Empirical.

490
00:19:09,336 --> 00:19:10,712
That's me.

491
00:19:10,820 --> 00:19:12,253
Shiny penny.

492
00:19:12,278 --> 00:19:13,805
Actually,
I wanted to talk to you about something

493
00:19:13,830 --> 00:19:15,615
- that Bryce said today...
- Liza.

494
00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:16,676
Hi.

495
00:19:16,702 --> 00:19:19,443
Figured I'd hit the bar before we go in.

496
00:19:19,566 --> 00:19:21,145
Josh, you remember Charles.

497
00:19:21,170 --> 00:19:22,447
Yeah, nice to see you again.

498
00:19:22,472 --> 00:19:23,509
You too.

499
00:19:23,534 --> 00:19:25,529
- Uh, this is Radha.
- Pleasure.

500
00:19:25,555 --> 00:19:26,593
Hi.

501
00:19:26,617 --> 00:19:28,715
Oh, we should take our seats.

502
00:19:28,891 --> 00:19:30,223
Have fun tonight.

503
00:19:30,248 --> 00:19:31,450
You too.

504
00:19:31,475 --> 00:19:32,791
Please.

505
00:19:50,740 --> 00:19:53,031
That was fun.

506
00:19:53,056 --> 00:19:54,687
Never again, though, right?

507
00:20:03,391 --> 00:20:04,657
Man.

508
00:20:04,682 --> 00:20:07,030
Good thing I already ordered a Lyft.

509
00:20:07,055 --> 00:20:09,274
Denang will be here in 11 minutes.

510
00:20:09,299 --> 00:20:11,470
- Come on, this will be faster.
- What?

511
00:20:11,496 --> 00:20:12,859
Okay.

512
00:20:29,857 --> 00:20:31,718
We can go to the opera

513
00:20:31,743 --> 00:20:33,733
whenever you want.

514
00:20:39,531 --> 00:20:44,149
- Synced and corrected by martythecrazy -
- www.addic7ed.com -