1
00:00:01,302 --> 00:00:03,737
Previously on
The Last Man On Earth...
Melissa's gone.

2
00:00:03,771 --> 00:00:04,838
Melissa!

3
00:00:04,872 --> 00:00:06,240
Has anybody seen my mom?

4
00:00:06,274 --> 00:00:07,908
She's probably just up in Napa.

5
00:00:07,941 --> 00:00:10,411
(shouting):
I'm stuck in the elevator!

6
00:00:10,444 --> 00:00:11,579
(gunshot)

7
00:00:11,612 --> 00:00:13,214
(panicked cries)
What was that?

8
00:00:13,247 --> 00:00:15,349
Melissa?
Please don't shoot us.

9
00:00:15,383 --> 00:00:16,884
Hey, guys.
Oh, my God.

10
00:00:16,917 --> 00:00:18,152
Let's get you home, hon.

11
00:00:18,186 --> 00:00:20,354
GAIL: Don't leave!
I'm in the elevator!

12
00:00:21,222 --> 00:00:23,424
(device whirring)

13
00:00:34,202 --> 00:00:38,139
Come here, you dumb
little robot vacuum.

14
00:00:39,407 --> 00:00:41,175
Come on.

15
00:00:41,209 --> 00:00:42,776
I ain't gonna hurt you.

16
00:00:42,810 --> 00:00:45,279
Oh... uh!

17
00:00:45,313 --> 00:00:47,215
Damn!

18
00:00:47,248 --> 00:00:48,782
(sighs)

19
00:00:52,920 --> 00:00:55,589
What are you laughing at,
Gordon?

20
00:00:56,990 --> 00:00:58,626
That little SkyMall R2D2

21
00:00:58,659 --> 00:01:00,228
is gonna be
our ticket out of here.

22
00:01:00,261 --> 00:01:03,231
And we're gonna get
the sumbitch.

23
00:01:03,264 --> 00:01:05,199
We're gonna get you!

24
00:01:05,233 --> 00:01:07,635
*

25
00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:10,771
So, you-you can't
tell us anything

26
00:01:10,804 --> 00:01:12,373
about the last
couple days?

27
00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:14,975
I was right here.

28
00:01:15,008 --> 00:01:16,244
No, you weren't, hon.

29
00:01:16,277 --> 00:01:17,578
You-you just disappeared,

30
00:01:17,611 --> 00:01:20,148
and you took all
your stuff with you.

31
00:01:20,181 --> 00:01:21,915
The only thing
you left behind was Alden

32
00:01:21,949 --> 00:01:23,417
and a note that said good-bye.

33
00:01:23,451 --> 00:01:25,018
Who's Alden?

34
00:01:26,787 --> 00:01:28,789
Can I have my gun back, please?

35
00:01:28,822 --> 00:01:30,424
Oh, sorry. Yes.
Of course.

36
00:01:30,458 --> 00:01:31,925
OTHERS: Tandy!
N-No?

37
00:01:31,959 --> 00:01:32,760
Oh, uh, sorry, no.

38
00:01:32,793 --> 00:01:33,761
That's a no.

39
00:01:33,794 --> 00:01:36,264
Okay.

40
00:01:37,798 --> 00:01:39,066
So what do we do here?

41
00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:40,668
She's not right
in the noggin.

42
00:01:40,701 --> 00:01:43,337
Okay, you mind if I take
the wheel for a smidge?

43
00:01:43,371 --> 00:01:45,439
I got a simple tizzy,
um, a simple test,

44
00:01:45,473 --> 00:01:46,440
that I think
should help us

45
00:01:46,474 --> 00:01:47,641
get to the bottom,
the butt,

46
00:01:47,675 --> 00:01:49,777
of the situation.

47
00:01:49,810 --> 00:01:50,911
Uh, Melissa?

48
00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:53,647
Uh, Melissa,
Melissa.

49
00:01:53,681 --> 00:01:55,283
How many fingers

50
00:01:55,316 --> 00:01:56,517
am I holding up?

51
00:01:56,550 --> 00:01:59,187
Is that a dinosaur costume?

52
00:01:59,220 --> 00:02:01,855
No, it was three.

53
00:02:01,889 --> 00:02:04,792
Guys, this is bad-- she
didn't even say a number.

54
00:02:04,825 --> 00:02:05,826
TODD:
Guys, look,

55
00:02:05,859 --> 00:02:07,161
Melissa's exhausted.

56
00:02:07,195 --> 00:02:08,462
Why don't we try to

57
00:02:08,496 --> 00:02:09,797
just let her get some rest,

58
00:02:09,830 --> 00:02:11,365
and figure this thing out
in the morning?

59
00:02:11,399 --> 00:02:14,134
Yeah, but, Todd, what if
she wanders off again?

60
00:02:14,168 --> 00:02:15,836
She's a danger to herself,
and maybe to us.

61
00:02:15,869 --> 00:02:17,605
We can't just let her
roam around here.

62
00:02:17,638 --> 00:02:19,006
Well, what are we gonna do, huh?

63
00:02:19,039 --> 00:02:20,608
Tie her up, put her in stocks?

64
00:02:20,641 --> 00:02:23,811
No. I don't know.
I mean, maybe.

65
00:02:23,844 --> 00:02:25,112
Yeah, I think
we should tie her up.

66
00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:26,780
We could lock her
in that focus-group room

67
00:02:26,814 --> 00:02:27,815
with the two-way mirror,

68
00:02:27,848 --> 00:02:29,149
keep an eye on her
from in there.

69
00:02:29,183 --> 00:02:30,884
But she's not a zoo animal!

70
00:02:30,918 --> 00:02:33,987
Okay? When we accused her
of being crazy, she ran away.

71
00:02:34,021 --> 00:02:38,559
So maybe we treat her
like a person this time.

72
00:02:38,592 --> 00:02:39,893
I think this is
a mistake.

73
00:02:39,927 --> 00:02:41,229
Yeah, well, don't worry
about it, all right?

74
00:02:41,262 --> 00:02:42,563
'Cause I'm taking care of her.

75
00:02:42,596 --> 00:02:43,564
Melissa, hey.

76
00:02:43,597 --> 00:02:45,699
Want to go for
a little walk?

77
00:02:45,733 --> 00:02:47,235
MELISSA:
I'm already walking.

78
00:02:47,268 --> 00:02:48,736
(Tandy groans)

79
00:02:48,769 --> 00:02:51,605
(chirps, barks)

80
00:02:54,775 --> 00:02:57,745
Hey, Care Bear.
What's up?

81
00:02:57,778 --> 00:03:00,080
Paper shredder.
Paper shredder?

82
00:03:00,113 --> 00:03:01,715
I hardly knew her.

83
00:03:01,749 --> 00:03:04,017
And boom goes the dinosaur!

84
00:03:04,051 --> 00:03:05,919
Oh...

85
00:03:07,788 --> 00:03:08,922
What are you shredding?

86
00:03:08,956 --> 00:03:11,058
Oh, my adoption papers.

87
00:03:11,091 --> 00:03:13,093
What? No, no, no!
Good-bye, cover letter.

88
00:03:13,126 --> 00:03:15,263
No, no, no, no.
Carol. Carol!

89
00:03:15,296 --> 00:03:17,331
No, no, no, no.

90
00:03:17,365 --> 00:03:20,801
No, no, no.
No, stop, stop, stop!

91
00:03:21,969 --> 00:03:24,238
What are you doing?
Why are you doing that?

92
00:03:24,272 --> 00:03:26,206
Because it's a bunch
of phony pepperoni.

93
00:03:26,240 --> 00:03:28,075
Baloney?
Oh, I'm not hungry.

94
00:03:28,108 --> 00:03:31,279
Look, Todd gave me
a wake-up call.

95
00:03:31,312 --> 00:03:33,581
I have been living in a
world of make-believe.

96
00:03:33,614 --> 00:03:35,616
I mean, calling Gail "Mom"?

97
00:03:35,649 --> 00:03:37,585
She's not really
my mom.

98
00:03:37,618 --> 00:03:39,720
You can't force someone
to be your family.

99
00:03:39,753 --> 00:03:41,355
Who does that?
Hey, Carol,

100
00:03:41,389 --> 00:03:42,756
the day you forced me
to marry you

101
00:03:42,790 --> 00:03:45,192
was the best day
of my life.

102
00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:47,395
Okay, stop it.
No, look.

103
00:03:47,428 --> 00:03:49,297
Uh, as I recall,

104
00:03:49,330 --> 00:03:52,065
we never went on a honeymoon,
did we, huh?

105
00:03:52,099 --> 00:03:53,301
What do you say?

106
00:03:53,334 --> 00:03:55,603
Oh, Tandy, I'm not
in the mood.

107
00:03:55,636 --> 00:03:58,439
Hey, let me tell you
a little story.

108
00:03:58,472 --> 00:04:01,141
There was once
this woman named Stella,

109
00:04:01,174 --> 00:04:05,145
and she just had this tremendous
amount of groove, right?

110
00:04:05,178 --> 00:04:07,448
But then one day, for reasons
unbeknownst to me--

111
00:04:07,481 --> 00:04:09,249
I never saw the movie,
it was based on a movie--

112
00:04:09,283 --> 00:04:12,653
uh, she lost it--
it just was gone, right?

113
00:04:12,686 --> 00:04:15,122
But then somehow--
again, I don't know how;

114
00:04:15,155 --> 00:04:16,624
I did not see this movie--

115
00:04:16,657 --> 00:04:20,127
there was something
that happened, okay?

116
00:04:20,160 --> 00:04:24,598
And that led to
the return of her groove.

117
00:04:24,632 --> 00:04:26,434
Tandy, I saw this movie,

118
00:04:26,467 --> 00:04:28,235
and this has nothing
to do with that.

119
00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:30,838
She dies at the very
beginning of it,

120
00:04:30,871 --> 00:04:32,072
and then her two
young employees

121
00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:33,474
prop her up and
pretend she's alive

122
00:04:33,507 --> 00:04:34,775
for the whole weekend.

123
00:04:34,808 --> 00:04:36,510
Exactly, Carol! See?

124
00:04:36,544 --> 00:04:39,313
And this is just like
Weekend at Stella's, okay?

125
00:04:39,347 --> 00:04:41,849
See, look, right now
your feelings are dead.

126
00:04:41,882 --> 00:04:44,184
What we need to do
is prop them up

127
00:04:44,217 --> 00:04:46,320
and stuff them
full of groove, right?

128
00:04:46,354 --> 00:04:49,523
No, Tandy, you can't bring
dead things back to life.

129
00:04:49,557 --> 00:04:52,326
Hey, you tell that
to Jesus Christ,

130
00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:53,627
and his buddy Frankenstein.

131
00:04:53,661 --> 00:04:56,096
I guess you have
a point.

132
00:04:56,129 --> 00:04:57,898
Pack your bags.
We leave tonight.

133
00:05:08,476 --> 00:05:12,680
Come on, you stupid robot.

134
00:05:12,713 --> 00:05:14,448
Soup's on.

135
00:05:14,482 --> 00:05:16,917
You hungry for some wig?

136
00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:26,627
Okay, Gordon.

137
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:28,161
Bait's set.

138
00:05:28,195 --> 00:05:30,197
Now we wait.

139
00:05:30,230 --> 00:05:31,899
All right.

140
00:05:31,932 --> 00:05:34,668
There you go.

141
00:05:34,702 --> 00:05:37,438
See you tomorrow, okay?

142
00:05:38,606 --> 00:05:40,207
Where are you going?

143
00:05:42,576 --> 00:05:44,645
Uh...

144
00:05:44,678 --> 00:05:46,980
Well, I mean,
we-we broke up, so...

145
00:05:47,014 --> 00:05:48,382
We did?

146
00:05:48,416 --> 00:05:50,017
Yeah.

147
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:52,853
That's too bad.

148
00:05:55,122 --> 00:05:56,924
All right, well, good night.

149
00:06:09,737 --> 00:06:13,273
TANDY: * If you're happy and
you know it, clap your hands *

150
00:06:13,306 --> 00:06:14,442
(claps)

151
00:06:14,475 --> 00:06:16,777
* If you're happy
and you know it *

152
00:06:16,810 --> 00:06:18,446
* Clap your hands
Come on, Carol.

153
00:06:18,479 --> 00:06:21,348
* If you're happy
and you know it *

154
00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:24,217
* And you really
want to show it *

155
00:06:24,251 --> 00:06:26,019
* If you're happy
and you know it *

156
00:06:26,053 --> 00:06:27,220
* Clap your hands.

157
00:06:27,254 --> 00:06:28,456
(claps)

158
00:06:28,489 --> 00:06:29,790
(laughs)

159
00:06:29,823 --> 00:06:32,292
Infused it with a little
R&B flavor, did you catch that?

160
00:06:32,325 --> 00:06:34,127
It was a winning
interpretation.

161
00:06:34,161 --> 00:06:35,228
Well, then, join in.

162
00:06:35,262 --> 00:06:36,630
I'm doing British
invasion this time.

163
00:06:36,664 --> 00:06:38,466
Okay? Ready?

164
00:06:38,499 --> 00:06:40,801
(British accent): * If you're
happy and you know it *

165
00:06:40,834 --> 00:06:43,203
* Stomp your feet
(stomps feet)
Oh.

166
00:06:43,236 --> 00:06:45,038
Oh... Tandy!
(laughing)

167
00:06:45,072 --> 00:06:46,139
That's my name.

168
00:06:46,173 --> 00:06:48,141
Say it again,
I'll tell you the same.

169
00:06:48,175 --> 00:06:49,443
Well, I'm gonna
get some sleep.

170
00:06:49,477 --> 00:06:51,612
Okay, well, great. When
you wake up tomorrow,

171
00:06:51,645 --> 00:06:52,813
well, we'll be there.

172
00:06:52,846 --> 00:06:54,448
And rest up,
'cause I got

173
00:06:54,482 --> 00:06:56,717
a lot of fun things
in store for you, huh?

174
00:06:56,750 --> 00:06:59,587
Until then, I'll be
singing a little reggae, huh?

175
00:06:59,620 --> 00:07:02,089
* If you're happy
and you know it *

176
00:07:02,122 --> 00:07:05,225
* Say you know it
I know it, mon *

177
00:07:05,258 --> 00:07:07,495
* If you're happy
and you know it *

178
00:07:07,528 --> 00:07:08,829
* Say you know it

179
00:07:08,862 --> 00:07:11,064
* I know it, Rastas.

180
00:07:11,098 --> 00:07:13,433
*

181
00:07:26,279 --> 00:07:28,549
She gone.

182
00:07:32,986 --> 00:07:34,488
I'm getting pretty good.

183
00:07:34,522 --> 00:07:36,356
Just trying to figure
out these landings.

184
00:07:36,389 --> 00:07:38,091
COMPUTER VOICE: Increase
altitude, increase altitude.

185
00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:39,527
Increase altitude?
It always says it.

186
00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:40,828
No, I'm trying to land!
Increase altitude.

187
00:07:40,861 --> 00:07:41,795
(repeating):
Terrain alert...

188
00:07:41,829 --> 00:07:42,963
I know there's terrain!

189
00:07:42,996 --> 00:07:44,498
I'm trying to land
on the terrain!

190
00:07:44,532 --> 00:07:46,366
Terrain alert. Pull up.
I will not.

191
00:07:46,399 --> 00:07:47,367
I am my own person.

192
00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:48,502
Pull up.
Terrain alert.

193
00:07:48,536 --> 00:07:49,970
Pull up. Terrain alert.

194
00:07:50,003 --> 00:07:51,304
(thud)

195
00:07:51,338 --> 00:07:52,940
Damn it!

196
00:07:52,973 --> 00:07:54,341
Landing unsuccessful.

197
00:07:54,374 --> 00:07:56,844
Yeah, I saw, you fricking dong!

198
00:07:56,877 --> 00:07:58,712
Sorry for my language,

199
00:07:58,746 --> 00:08:00,213
but this thing just
has it out for me.

200
00:08:00,247 --> 00:08:03,216
No, Lewis.
It earned that dong.

201
00:08:03,250 --> 00:08:05,352
Hey. You guys
seen Melissa?

202
00:08:05,385 --> 00:08:06,820
Oh, no.
Is she missing again?

203
00:08:06,854 --> 00:08:08,021
Oh, no.

204
00:08:08,055 --> 00:08:09,189
She's here to the max.

205
00:08:09,222 --> 00:08:11,058
Yep. Know exactly
where she is.

206
00:08:11,091 --> 00:08:13,393
Totally accounted for.
She's clear and present,

207
00:08:13,426 --> 00:08:14,895
and there is no danger.

208
00:08:18,031 --> 00:08:20,033
(whistling)

209
00:08:22,870 --> 00:08:25,238
TANDY:
Almost there.

210
00:08:25,272 --> 00:08:26,540
You excited?

211
00:08:26,574 --> 00:08:27,741
Yeah.

212
00:08:27,775 --> 00:08:28,909
Almost there.

213
00:08:28,942 --> 00:08:31,712
Just a little further.

214
00:08:31,745 --> 00:08:35,248
Little further.

215
00:08:35,282 --> 00:08:36,584
Happy honeymoon!

216
00:08:36,617 --> 00:08:37,818
What's all this?

217
00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:38,919
I recreated the campsite

218
00:08:38,952 --> 00:08:40,053
where we first met.

219
00:08:40,087 --> 00:08:41,388
Remember?

220
00:08:41,421 --> 00:08:43,591
I was wearing these
fashionable duds.

221
00:08:43,624 --> 00:08:45,726
Had that big, sexy beard.

222
00:08:45,759 --> 00:08:48,095
(laughs)
I was over here,

223
00:08:48,128 --> 00:08:51,431
sniffing up on your brassiere
like a gentleman.

224
00:08:51,464 --> 00:08:53,767
(inhales, moans)

225
00:08:53,801 --> 00:08:56,770
(crying)

226
00:08:57,437 --> 00:08:59,406
(sighs)

227
00:08:59,439 --> 00:09:01,341
And remember what
you did? Huh?

228
00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:03,410
Yeah, I pulled a gun on you.

229
00:09:03,443 --> 00:09:05,178
Popped up out of nowhere.

230
00:09:05,212 --> 00:09:06,580
Scared the
bejesus out of me.

231
00:09:06,614 --> 00:09:08,048
Made me wet my panties.

232
00:09:08,081 --> 00:09:09,249
But you said they were wet

233
00:09:09,282 --> 00:09:10,784
from something before.

234
00:09:10,818 --> 00:09:12,686
Well, that wasn't true.

235
00:09:12,720 --> 00:09:14,888
I was a lying
skunk back then.

236
00:09:14,922 --> 00:09:16,456
But not anymore.

237
00:09:16,489 --> 00:09:18,959
See, today, I'd proudly
admit that that wetness

238
00:09:18,992 --> 00:09:21,294
came from my penis.

239
00:09:21,328 --> 00:09:22,963
And that's all
'cause of you, girl.

240
00:09:24,297 --> 00:09:25,633
I-I don't want to hear

241
00:09:25,666 --> 00:09:27,635
that there's no magic
in this world,

242
00:09:27,668 --> 00:09:29,803
'cause you
David Copperfielded me.

243
00:09:29,837 --> 00:09:31,304
Bigly.

244
00:09:31,338 --> 00:09:33,106
Thanks, Tandy.

245
00:09:33,140 --> 00:09:36,243
Hey, want to go
do some fishing?

246
00:09:36,276 --> 00:09:38,145
Oh, there's no fish.

247
00:09:38,178 --> 00:09:40,981
Really? 'Cause I have
a sneaky suspicion

248
00:09:41,014 --> 00:09:42,783
that you're about
to catch a whopper.

249
00:09:42,816 --> 00:09:44,084
And there might even be

250
00:09:44,117 --> 00:09:45,786
a little cheese on
there. Come on.

251
00:09:45,819 --> 00:09:47,120
Cheese?

252
00:09:47,154 --> 00:09:49,489
(vacuum whirring)

253
00:09:53,460 --> 00:09:54,728
(gasps)

254
00:09:54,762 --> 00:09:56,129
Oh, my God! Oh, my God.

255
00:09:56,163 --> 00:09:57,364
We got a bite.

256
00:09:58,866 --> 00:10:01,434
Yes. Gotcha.

257
00:10:01,468 --> 00:10:03,270
You little crumb gobbler.

258
00:10:03,303 --> 00:10:05,973
Don't fight me.

259
00:10:06,006 --> 00:10:09,376
Mama's got plans for you.

260
00:10:14,347 --> 00:10:16,850
Hey, Care Bear.

261
00:10:16,884 --> 00:10:18,819
(whoops)

262
00:10:18,852 --> 00:10:20,087
How's the fishing doing?

263
00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:21,254
(whoops)

264
00:10:21,288 --> 00:10:23,323
Oh, my God.

265
00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:24,624
(laughing):
Oh, my God.

266
00:10:24,658 --> 00:10:26,459
No way. I got
something on here.

267
00:10:26,493 --> 00:10:27,661
You want to reel it in?

268
00:10:27,695 --> 00:10:29,129
I don't know how.

269
00:10:29,162 --> 00:10:30,297
Okay. I got it, I got it.

270
00:10:30,330 --> 00:10:32,099
(grunting):
It's a fighter.

271
00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:33,333
(laughing):
It's a fighter.

272
00:10:33,366 --> 00:10:35,002
Oh, it's a--
I got it, though.

273
00:10:35,035 --> 00:10:36,536
I got it.

274
00:10:36,569 --> 00:10:38,371
What species is this?

275
00:10:38,405 --> 00:10:39,339
Oh, my God.

276
00:10:39,372 --> 00:10:41,541
Shut the hell up.

277
00:10:41,574 --> 00:10:43,210
A mink coat.

278
00:10:43,243 --> 00:10:44,611
Oh, please be a men's.

279
00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:46,146
Please be a men's.

280
00:10:46,179 --> 00:10:49,883
Oh, fudge,
it's a ladies.

281
00:10:49,917 --> 00:10:51,451
You want to try it on?

282
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:54,021
Uh, no. It's soaking wet, so...

283
00:10:54,054 --> 00:10:55,723
Tell you what. Why don't
we let it dry off,

284
00:10:55,756 --> 00:10:57,758
and I'll be
right back. Okay?

285
00:10:59,559 --> 00:11:01,561
(grunts)

286
00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:04,965
Okay, be back
in a little bit.

287
00:11:04,998 --> 00:11:06,333
Going to do something.

288
00:11:17,778 --> 00:11:19,713
(whoops)
Okay, Tandy.

289
00:11:19,747 --> 00:11:21,048
What'd you put on there?

290
00:11:21,081 --> 00:11:23,250
What?
My line.

291
00:11:23,283 --> 00:11:25,485
Oh, my God.

292
00:11:25,518 --> 00:11:26,586
Oh, my God!

293
00:11:26,619 --> 00:11:28,722
Can you stop messing around?
No, no, no.

294
00:11:28,756 --> 00:11:30,423
I put a Rembrandt on mine,

295
00:11:30,457 --> 00:11:31,892
but I didn't put
anything on yours.

296
00:11:31,925 --> 00:11:33,193
What? What do I do?

297
00:11:33,226 --> 00:11:34,594
I-I didn't do that.
Oh, my goll.

298
00:11:34,627 --> 00:11:35,763
Reel it in.
Reel it in.

299
00:11:35,796 --> 00:11:37,030
Oh, my goll.

300
00:11:37,064 --> 00:11:38,098
Help, Tandy! Tandy!

301
00:11:38,131 --> 00:11:40,100
(shrieking):
Look at this! Tandy!

302
00:11:40,133 --> 00:11:42,402
I can't believe it.
I can't believe it.

303
00:11:42,435 --> 00:11:44,371
Oh! It's a fish!
(Tandy laughing)

304
00:11:47,307 --> 00:11:50,443
You got a better idea?

305
00:11:50,477 --> 00:11:52,379
I didn't think so.

306
00:12:01,822 --> 00:12:03,090
Go, Tron!

307
00:12:03,123 --> 00:12:04,391
Find the others!

308
00:12:06,459 --> 00:12:08,495
No. No!

309
00:12:10,430 --> 00:12:12,132
No!

310
00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:14,768
(frustrated groan)

311
00:12:16,503 --> 00:12:19,572
See you in hell, robo-turd.

312
00:12:21,341 --> 00:12:23,343
(grunts)

313
00:12:25,178 --> 00:12:27,915
Damn it!

314
00:12:27,948 --> 00:12:30,583
(groans)

315
00:12:31,852 --> 00:12:34,154
(grunts)

316
00:12:34,187 --> 00:12:38,325
Where the hell
are you fricking people?!

317
00:12:38,358 --> 00:12:39,960
Come find me!

318
00:12:39,993 --> 00:12:42,295
(gunshots)

319
00:12:43,696 --> 00:12:46,566
Ow!

320
00:12:46,599 --> 00:12:48,501
Oh.

321
00:12:48,535 --> 00:12:50,938
(groans)

322
00:12:50,971 --> 00:12:52,806
TODD:
Melissa?

323
00:12:52,840 --> 00:12:54,007
Melissa?

324
00:12:54,041 --> 00:12:56,009
Is Melissa gone?

325
00:12:56,043 --> 00:12:57,244
What?

326
00:12:57,277 --> 00:12:58,445
(laughs)
Well, no.

327
00:12:58,478 --> 00:13:01,648
Of co... I-I was just singing,
uh, "Melissa."

328
00:13:01,681 --> 00:13:03,650
You know,
that Allman Brothers song.

329
00:13:03,683 --> 00:13:06,453
* But back home
he'll always run *

330
00:13:06,486 --> 00:13:07,687
* To sweet...

331
00:13:07,720 --> 00:13:08,922
(yelling):
Melissa!

332
00:13:08,956 --> 00:13:11,358
(vocalizing)

333
00:13:11,391 --> 00:13:13,193
She's gone, man.

334
00:13:13,226 --> 00:13:14,794
I-I've-- I-I looked

335
00:13:14,828 --> 00:13:15,863
everywhere for her.

336
00:13:15,896 --> 00:13:17,597
I knew that we
should've restrained her.

337
00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:18,832
No. Look, stop saying that.

338
00:13:18,866 --> 00:13:20,600
We just need to figure out
where she is, man.

339
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:22,369
Why don't we start
with the roof?

340
00:13:25,505 --> 00:13:26,706
Oh, my God.

341
00:13:31,845 --> 00:13:33,813
(whistling)

342
00:13:33,847 --> 00:13:36,483
(humming)

343
00:13:36,516 --> 00:13:37,717
Melissa?

344
00:13:37,750 --> 00:13:38,986
Can you, can you,

345
00:13:39,019 --> 00:13:40,053
can you please get
down from there?

346
00:13:40,087 --> 00:13:41,388
It's-it's really not safe.

347
00:13:41,421 --> 00:13:43,723
Why, are you worried
I'm gonna jump?
(all yelling)

348
00:13:43,756 --> 00:13:45,225
No, no, no, no!
Please don't do that!
No, no, no.

349
00:13:45,258 --> 00:13:46,526
Do what? This?
(yells)

350
00:13:46,559 --> 00:13:48,061
Melissa! Melissa, please.
Come down from there.

351
00:13:48,095 --> 00:13:49,062
I'm begging you.

352
00:13:49,096 --> 00:13:51,664
Okay.

353
00:13:53,934 --> 00:13:56,736
What's up?

354
00:13:56,769 --> 00:13:58,071
What are you doing
up there, hon?

355
00:14:00,440 --> 00:14:01,708
I don't know.

356
00:14:07,948 --> 00:14:09,216
Hey, hon.

357
00:14:09,249 --> 00:14:12,752
You want to take, uh, just
a little walk with me?

358
00:14:12,785 --> 00:14:14,787
*

359
00:14:18,091 --> 00:14:19,259
(Carol chuckling)

360
00:14:19,292 --> 00:14:20,760
TANDY:
Cute little sucker, huh?

361
00:14:20,793 --> 00:14:22,229
What do you think,
boy or girl?

362
00:14:22,262 --> 00:14:23,430
Oh, definitely a girl.

363
00:14:23,463 --> 00:14:25,032
Yeah? How can you tell?
Yeah.

364
00:14:25,065 --> 00:14:27,700
Well, fish have famously
pronounced penises.

365
00:14:28,468 --> 00:14:30,437
Huh.
Or is that horses?

366
00:14:30,470 --> 00:14:31,604
Either way,

367
00:14:31,638 --> 00:14:34,074
my gut is telling me
this is a little fish girl.

368
00:14:34,107 --> 00:14:36,109
Works for me.

369
00:14:36,143 --> 00:14:37,277
Should we name her?

370
00:14:37,310 --> 00:14:38,278
Yeah, sure.

371
00:14:38,311 --> 00:14:40,380
Why don't you do the honors?

372
00:14:40,413 --> 00:14:42,782
I want to name her Gail.

373
00:14:42,815 --> 00:14:44,451
Gail it is.

374
00:14:44,484 --> 00:14:47,287
I think I want to go back
to the motor home.

375
00:14:47,320 --> 00:14:49,189
But I thought we were
starting to have fun.

376
00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:50,790
Let me finish.

377
00:14:50,823 --> 00:14:52,692
I want to go back
to the motor home

378
00:14:52,725 --> 00:14:56,263
and have honeymoon sex
with my husband.

379
00:14:56,296 --> 00:14:59,266
Oh. Well, let me go
wash my balls.

380
00:14:59,299 --> 00:15:01,101
Keep 'em dirty.

381
00:15:01,134 --> 00:15:02,970
Carol Pilbasian Miller!

382
00:15:03,003 --> 00:15:04,837
Just kidding,
please wash them.

383
00:15:10,177 --> 00:15:12,145
Where should I put down
my sleeping bag?

384
00:15:12,179 --> 00:15:13,746
Oh, Tandy?

385
00:15:13,780 --> 00:15:15,882
Why would we do sexy
camping jibber-jabber

386
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:17,584
when we're already camping?

387
00:15:17,617 --> 00:15:18,818
Oh, so we're going
the other way with it.

388
00:15:18,851 --> 00:15:20,220
Okay. Uh, you want me to

389
00:15:20,253 --> 00:15:21,488
pull down the duvet cover

390
00:15:21,521 --> 00:15:23,923
on our big, fancy, indoor bed?

391
00:15:23,957 --> 00:15:25,492
Oh, yeah, that's more like it!

392
00:15:25,525 --> 00:15:26,960
How big is the bed, Tandy?

393
00:15:26,994 --> 00:15:28,996
(scoffs)
California King.

394
00:15:29,029 --> 00:15:30,330
What's the sleep number?

395
00:15:30,363 --> 00:15:32,665
Uh, it's, uh, 15 for me
and 54 for you,

396
00:15:32,699 --> 00:15:34,767
for a grand total of 69.
Ooh,

397
00:15:34,801 --> 00:15:36,103
that's firm.

398
00:15:36,136 --> 00:15:37,804
What's the thread count
on these sheets?

399
00:15:37,837 --> 00:15:39,139
It's high, Carol!
How high?

400
00:15:39,172 --> 00:15:40,640
It's really high!
Oh, no!

401
00:15:40,673 --> 00:15:42,609
These sheets are for company!

402
00:15:42,642 --> 00:15:43,810
It's too late,
they're already on

403
00:15:43,843 --> 00:15:45,645
and tucked real tight
with hospital corners!

404
00:15:45,678 --> 00:15:48,948
(Carol screaming)

405
00:15:57,824 --> 00:15:59,492
TODD:
Love this room.

406
00:16:00,527 --> 00:16:02,195
Isn't it great?

407
00:16:04,231 --> 00:16:05,698
It's fine.

408
00:16:10,903 --> 00:16:13,040
You trust me, right?

409
00:16:13,073 --> 00:16:14,874
Yeah.

410
00:16:14,907 --> 00:16:18,145
We think it's a good idea
for you to, uh,

411
00:16:18,178 --> 00:16:20,713
be in here.

412
00:16:20,747 --> 00:16:21,714
You know, um,

413
00:16:21,748 --> 00:16:23,883
just until you,

414
00:16:23,916 --> 00:16:25,918
um...

415
00:16:27,054 --> 00:16:28,555
(voice breaking):
just for a little while.

416
00:16:29,589 --> 00:16:31,058
I don't want to stay in here.

417
00:16:32,159 --> 00:16:34,727
I'm sor...
Don't touch me.

418
00:16:34,761 --> 00:16:36,996
It's for your...
Get away from me!

419
00:16:55,248 --> 00:16:56,249
(door rattles)

420
00:16:59,219 --> 00:17:00,553
Todd?

421
00:17:02,789 --> 00:17:04,457
Todd, the door is locked.

422
00:17:06,859 --> 00:17:09,296
Todd, the door is locked!

423
00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:13,233
Todd?

424
00:17:13,266 --> 00:17:16,236
They're not gonna find me.

425
00:17:21,608 --> 00:17:24,043
I'm just gonna
friggin' die here.

426
00:17:27,947 --> 00:17:31,418
God, I'd give anything
to see those...

427
00:17:34,321 --> 00:17:37,757
...friggin' idiots right now.

428
00:17:37,790 --> 00:17:39,226
Carol!

429
00:17:39,259 --> 00:17:41,461
Farts are a natural
bodily function,

430
00:17:41,494 --> 00:17:44,097
and I took it as a sign that
you were completely uninhibited.

431
00:17:44,131 --> 00:17:45,798
In fact, I hope you do it again.

432
00:17:45,832 --> 00:17:47,400
(giggles)
(chuckles)

433
00:17:48,935 --> 00:17:50,637
Gail!
Oh, my God!

434
00:17:50,670 --> 00:17:52,439
(gasping):
No, no, no, no!

435
00:17:52,472 --> 00:17:53,473
Oh, what do we do?

436
00:17:53,506 --> 00:17:54,707
What do we do?
Oh, mouth-to-mouth!

437
00:17:54,741 --> 00:17:56,143
(blowing)
What? No.

438
00:17:56,176 --> 00:17:57,477
No, Tandy,
you have to do

439
00:17:57,510 --> 00:17:58,745
the exact opposite of that!
Oh,

440
00:17:58,778 --> 00:17:59,746
suck the air out!

441
00:17:59,779 --> 00:18:01,414
(sucking)
Oh, Tandy,

442
00:18:01,448 --> 00:18:02,482
you have to put water into it!

443
00:18:02,515 --> 00:18:04,083
(stammering):
Okay, okay!

444
00:18:05,118 --> 00:18:06,686
Stay with me, Gail!

445
00:18:08,455 --> 00:18:10,123
(yelling):
Don't go to the light!

446
00:18:10,157 --> 00:18:11,124
Tandy!

447
00:18:11,158 --> 00:18:12,825
No!
Tandy!

448
00:18:12,859 --> 00:18:14,494
Tandy!

449
00:18:14,527 --> 00:18:15,628
She's gone.

450
00:18:22,369 --> 00:18:23,870
(sighs)

451
00:18:45,892 --> 00:18:47,126
Well, Gail,

452
00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:48,961
I guess this is it.

453
00:18:48,995 --> 00:18:52,031
You lived longer
than most.

454
00:18:52,064 --> 00:18:54,801
And we're so sorry.

455
00:18:54,834 --> 00:18:56,002
We took you out
of your pond

456
00:18:56,035 --> 00:18:58,838
and you died
because of it.

457
00:18:58,871 --> 00:19:00,440
But if it's
any consolation,

458
00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:02,141
you didn't die in vain.

459
00:19:02,175 --> 00:19:05,212
Thanks for showing me that
miracles still do exist

460
00:19:05,245 --> 00:19:06,879
in this world.

461
00:19:11,651 --> 00:19:15,222
(splashing)

462
00:19:17,724 --> 00:19:19,058
Oh...

463
00:19:19,091 --> 00:19:20,493
No, no, no, Gail!

464
00:19:20,527 --> 00:19:21,728
Gail!
Oh!

465
00:19:21,761 --> 00:19:23,996
(screaming)
(laughing)

466
00:19:24,030 --> 00:19:25,164
(gasping)
(laughing):
Gail!

467
00:19:25,198 --> 00:19:27,667
It's Gail!
It's Gail!

468
00:19:27,700 --> 00:19:30,169
(laughing)
Gail's alive!

469
00:19:30,203 --> 00:19:31,504
CAROL:
Gail!

470
00:19:31,538 --> 00:19:33,806
* Now that you've found

471
00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:36,843
* Your paradise

472
00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:39,078
* This is your kingdom

473
00:19:39,111 --> 00:19:41,514
* To command

474
00:19:41,548 --> 00:19:44,384
* You can go outside

475
00:19:44,417 --> 00:19:47,254
* And polish your car

476
00:19:47,287 --> 00:19:49,322
* Or sit by the fire

477
00:19:49,356 --> 00:19:51,424
* In your Shangri-la

478
00:19:55,061 --> 00:19:57,430
* Here's your reward

479
00:19:57,464 --> 00:20:00,199
* For working so hard

480
00:20:00,233 --> 00:20:02,935
* Gone are the lavatories

481
00:20:02,969 --> 00:20:05,272
* In the back yard

482
00:20:05,305 --> 00:20:07,340
* Gone are the days

483
00:20:07,374 --> 00:20:10,109
* When you dreamed of that car

484
00:20:10,142 --> 00:20:12,211
* You just want to sit

485
00:20:12,245 --> 00:20:16,215
* In your Shangri-la

486
00:20:16,249 --> 00:20:18,285
* Put on your slippers

487
00:20:18,318 --> 00:20:20,119
* And sit by the fire

488
00:20:20,152 --> 00:20:21,954
* You've reached your top

489
00:20:21,988 --> 00:20:26,125
* And you just can't
get any higher *

490
00:20:26,158 --> 00:20:30,229
* You're in your place
and you know where you are *

491
00:20:30,263 --> 00:20:34,000
* In your Shangri-la

492
00:20:35,735 --> 00:20:39,739
* Sit back
in your old rocking chair *

493
00:20:39,772 --> 00:20:41,741
* You need not worry

494
00:20:41,774 --> 00:20:44,611
* You need not care

495
00:20:44,644 --> 00:20:49,416
* You can't go anywhere

496
00:20:49,449 --> 00:20:50,783
* Shangri-la

497
00:20:53,686 --> 00:20:56,022
* Shangri-la...

498
00:20:57,990 --> 00:21:00,627
* Shangri-la...
(gunshot)

499
00:21:07,033 --> 00:21:10,970
* The little man
who gets the train *

500
00:21:11,003 --> 00:21:13,139
* Got a mortgage

501
00:21:13,172 --> 00:21:15,808
* Hanging over his head

502
00:21:17,777 --> 00:21:20,279
* But he's too scared
to complain *

503
00:21:22,014 --> 00:21:24,784
* 'Cause he's conditioned
that way *

504
00:21:26,986 --> 00:21:30,757
* Time goes by
and he pays off his debts *

505
00:21:30,790 --> 00:21:34,627
* Got a TV set and a radio...

506
00:21:35,962 --> 00:21:37,430
CHILDREN:
Uncle Stinky.

507
00:21:37,464 --> 00:21:38,965
(dolphin chittering)

508
00:21:38,998 --> 00:21:41,968
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH