1
00:00:01,769 --> 00:00:02,801
-Good evening, everybody,
2
00:00:02,869 --> 00:00:05,837
And welcome to
"whose line is it anyway?"
3
00:00:05,906 --> 00:00:10,275
On tonight's show,
easy to dance to, wayne brady.
4
00:00:10,343 --> 00:00:12,978
A real toe-tapper,
heather anne campbell.
5
00:00:13,047 --> 00:00:15,914
We'll be humming it
all night, colin mochrie.
6
00:00:15,983 --> 00:00:19,918
And you call that music?
Ryan stiles.
7
00:00:19,920 --> 00:00:23,989
And I'm aisha tyler.
Let's make some stuff up!
8
00:00:24,057 --> 00:00:26,025
[ cheers and applause ]
9
00:00:29,663 --> 00:00:30,863
Welcome.
10
00:00:30,931 --> 00:00:33,532
Welcome to the show
where everything is made up
11
00:00:33,534 --> 00:00:35,400
And the points
do not matter.
12
00:00:35,403 --> 00:00:37,002
We've got a great show
for you tonight
13
00:00:37,070 --> 00:00:40,472
So let's get started with a game
we call "let's make a date."
14
00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:42,040
This is for all four
of our performers,
15
00:00:42,043 --> 00:00:44,743
So if you'd like to come on down
and take your positions.
16
00:00:44,812 --> 00:00:46,311
[ cheers and applause ]
17
00:00:46,379 --> 00:00:47,846
Heather, you are a contestant,
18
00:00:47,915 --> 00:00:49,982
And you're looking for love
on tv dating show,
19
00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:51,483
And wayne, colin, and ryan
20
00:00:51,485 --> 00:00:53,285
Are the hopefuls
that you are choosing from.
21
00:00:53,353 --> 00:00:55,220
However, none of them
are the kind of people
22
00:00:55,222 --> 00:00:58,557
That you would expect
or ever really want to date.
23
00:00:58,625 --> 00:01:01,426
They've all been given a strange
characteristic or identity,
24
00:01:01,429 --> 00:01:03,095
And you're going
to question them about
25
00:01:03,163 --> 00:01:04,863
Their suitability for a date
and, in the process,
26
00:01:04,931 --> 00:01:06,899
You're going to try to
figure out who they are, okay?
27
00:01:06,967 --> 00:01:11,670
So, if everyone's ready,
heather, go make a date.
28
00:01:11,738 --> 00:01:14,773
-Bachelor number one,
I love poems.
29
00:01:14,775 --> 00:01:18,177
If you were a cereal,
which one would you be?
30
00:01:19,980 --> 00:01:24,649
-Well, really, to be a cereal,
31
00:01:24,652 --> 00:01:30,455
Your skin must be smooth as silk
32
00:01:30,524 --> 00:01:34,526
But then would it be
raisin and milk?
33
00:01:34,595 --> 00:01:36,128
[ applause ]
34
00:01:36,130 --> 00:01:38,530
Gracias.
35
00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:39,798
No.
36
00:01:39,866 --> 00:01:42,934
-Thank you.
-Thank you.
37
00:01:42,937 --> 00:01:44,636
-Bachelor number two,
38
00:01:44,704 --> 00:01:48,206
My favorite animal
is the german shepherd.
39
00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:50,943
What do you want
as your epitaph?
40
00:01:51,011 --> 00:01:53,011
[ laughter ]
41
00:01:56,016 --> 00:01:57,983
[ cheers and applause ]
42
00:01:59,086 --> 00:02:02,954
-First of all, don't judge me
'cause I know what I'm doing.
43
00:02:02,957 --> 00:02:05,857
No matter what people say,
I know what I'm doing.
44
00:02:05,926 --> 00:02:09,561
I know exactly.
45
00:02:09,629 --> 00:02:11,597
[ cheers and applause ]
46
00:02:18,906 --> 00:02:23,041
Roses are red, violets are blue.
I like you. Let's do it.
47
00:02:23,109 --> 00:02:25,077
[ laughter ]
48
00:02:26,279 --> 00:02:28,313
That's just one of the moves
I have.
49
00:02:28,382 --> 00:02:30,982
That is just
one of the moves I have.
50
00:02:30,985 --> 00:02:33,018
[ laughter ]
51
00:02:41,261 --> 00:02:44,329
-Bachelor number three,
52
00:02:44,331 --> 00:02:47,332
If you were to pick me up
for the perfect date,
53
00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:50,802
What would your favorite song
be on that date?
54
00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:54,139
-[ grunts ]
55
00:02:54,207 --> 00:02:56,175
[ laughter ]
56
00:03:00,147 --> 00:03:04,115
"rudolph the red-nosed
reindeer," I suppose.
57
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:07,686
I'd like to sit in that chair,
if you wouldn't mind.
58
00:03:07,754 --> 00:03:09,521
-Well, I --
-get out of the chair!
59
00:03:09,589 --> 00:03:11,557
[ laughter ]
60
00:03:19,866 --> 00:03:20,899
Hey!
61
00:03:20,968 --> 00:03:22,901
[ growls ]
62
00:03:22,970 --> 00:03:24,970
[ laughter and applause ]
63
00:03:30,543 --> 00:03:32,477
[ groaning ]
64
00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:34,513
[ laughter ]
65
00:03:36,583 --> 00:03:40,352
[ buzzer ]
-alright, heather, do you have
66
00:03:40,420 --> 00:03:43,755
Any idea who everyone is?
67
00:03:43,823 --> 00:03:45,791
Want to try and guess?
68
00:03:45,859 --> 00:03:47,459
-Yeah, I think I've got an idea
69
00:03:47,461 --> 00:03:48,893
Of who they were.
-Okay.
70
00:03:48,962 --> 00:03:50,061
-Bachelor number one,
71
00:03:50,130 --> 00:03:55,133
You were some kind of latin
lover, dancer.
72
00:03:55,201 --> 00:03:56,535
[ buzzer ]
73
00:03:56,603 --> 00:03:58,903
-Yes.
74
00:03:58,972 --> 00:04:03,141
-Bachelor number two,
mick jagger?
75
00:04:03,209 --> 00:04:04,943
[ laughter ]
76
00:04:05,011 --> 00:04:07,879
-I'm going to give that to you.
I'm giving it to you.
77
00:04:07,948 --> 00:04:11,983
It is not correct, but I'm going
to let you have it anyway.
78
00:04:12,052 --> 00:04:16,421
-Alright. And then bachelor
number three, you were a moose.
79
00:04:16,490 --> 00:04:17,822
-No.
-No?
80
00:04:17,825 --> 00:04:20,692
-No. What do moose go to
if they're getting married?
81
00:04:20,761 --> 00:04:25,297
They go to a party
with their other moose friends?
82
00:04:25,365 --> 00:04:27,165
-You were..."meece"?
83
00:04:27,233 --> 00:04:30,702
-Yes. Very nice.
[ buzzer ]
84
00:04:30,771 --> 00:04:32,704
[ cheers and applause ]
85
00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:34,773
[ indistinct talking ]
86
00:04:37,510 --> 00:04:40,979
And a thousand points
to heather anne campbell
87
00:04:40,981 --> 00:04:44,382
For coming up with the word
"meece,"
88
00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:45,984
Which, if I'm not mistaken,
89
00:04:46,053 --> 00:04:49,354
Is the plural for mice,
not moose.
90
00:04:49,422 --> 00:04:50,789
-Mices.
91
00:04:50,857 --> 00:04:52,557
-Next, we're going to play
a game called "props"
92
00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:55,594
Which is for all four of our
performers, so come on down.
93
00:04:55,662 --> 00:04:58,196
[ cheers and applause ]
94
00:04:58,265 --> 00:05:01,633
They're divided into two pairs,
so, ryan and heather,
95
00:05:01,701 --> 00:05:03,868
These are your props right here,
96
00:05:03,937 --> 00:05:06,371
And, wayne and colin,
this is for you.
97
00:05:06,439 --> 00:05:08,406
Divide it up between
you equally. Do what you can.
98
00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:09,908
-[ laughs ] probably nothing.
99
00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:11,509
[ laughter ]
100
00:05:11,578 --> 00:05:12,878
-Each of them have a different
set of props,
101
00:05:12,946 --> 00:05:14,746
And they've got to use them in
as many interesting ways
102
00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:16,481
As they possibly can, okay?
103
00:05:16,483 --> 00:05:18,750
And we're going to start now
with ryan and heather.
104
00:05:18,818 --> 00:05:20,485
-Oh, it is so cold in here.
105
00:05:20,554 --> 00:05:23,254
[ laughter ]
106
00:05:23,323 --> 00:05:24,623
-Alright, goliath,
107
00:05:24,691 --> 00:05:27,626
I, david, shall defeat you
by throwing this mighty rock.
108
00:05:28,228 --> 00:05:30,862
[ laughter ]
109
00:05:30,930 --> 00:05:32,898
[ buzzer ]
110
00:05:35,368 --> 00:05:37,435
-Probably should have warned the
musketeers about the quicksand.
111
00:05:37,438 --> 00:05:40,372
[ laughter ]
[ buzzer ]
112
00:05:40,440 --> 00:05:42,607
-I hope they cut
the umbilical cord soon.
113
00:05:42,675 --> 00:05:44,075
[ laughter ]
114
00:05:44,144 --> 00:05:45,977
[ buzzer ]
115
00:05:46,045 --> 00:05:48,346
-I'm telling you, lady,
this toilet is plugged.
116
00:05:48,349 --> 00:05:51,349
[ laughter ]
[ buzzer ]
117
00:05:51,352 --> 00:05:53,985
-[ grunting ]
118
00:05:54,054 --> 00:05:56,221
-A gay mummy.
What are the odds?
119
00:05:56,289 --> 00:05:58,724
[ laughter ]
[ buzzer ]
120
00:05:59,860 --> 00:06:02,060
-Today, we bury
the pinocchio family.
121
00:06:02,128 --> 00:06:04,363
[ laughter ]
122
00:06:04,431 --> 00:06:05,830
[ doorbell rings ]
123
00:06:05,899 --> 00:06:07,866
[ laughter ]
124
00:06:10,671 --> 00:06:12,704
[ buzzer ]
125
00:06:12,940 --> 00:06:15,173
[ both imitating
horses galloping ]
126
00:06:15,241 --> 00:06:18,376
-Oh! [ grunts ]
-oh, god! Oh! Yes.
127
00:06:18,379 --> 00:06:20,278
-Good jousting. Good jousting.
[ buzzer ]
128
00:06:20,280 --> 00:06:21,846
[ laughter ]
129
00:06:21,915 --> 00:06:24,015
-That was the biggest bubble
I've ever blown.
130
00:06:24,084 --> 00:06:25,316
[ laughter ]
131
00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:27,952
[ buzzer ]
132
00:06:28,021 --> 00:06:29,654
-See you at the bottom?
-Oh, yeah.
133
00:06:32,459 --> 00:06:33,958
[ grunts ]
134
00:06:34,027 --> 00:06:36,027
-Clear!
135
00:06:36,029 --> 00:06:39,964
[ laughter ]
136
00:06:40,033 --> 00:06:42,834
[ buzzer ]
137
00:06:42,903 --> 00:06:44,903
[ cheers and applause ]
138
00:06:48,175 --> 00:06:49,641
[ laughter ]
139
00:06:49,643 --> 00:06:51,676
[ cheers and applause ]
140
00:06:53,046 --> 00:06:55,346
-[ exhales sharply ]
141
00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:57,149
Hell, no.
[ buzzer ]
142
00:06:57,217 --> 00:06:59,217
[ laughter and applause ]
143
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:02,821
[ buzzer ]
144
00:07:02,889 --> 00:07:04,022
-Honey, I bought it for you.
145
00:07:04,090 --> 00:07:05,457
It's going to help
to make my [bleep] bigger.
146
00:07:05,525 --> 00:07:06,858
-Oh, great.
147
00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:08,427
[ laughter ]
[ buzzer ]
148
00:07:08,495 --> 00:07:10,328
-[ panting ]
149
00:07:10,397 --> 00:07:11,996
-Gene simmons.
150
00:07:12,065 --> 00:07:14,065
[ laughter ]
151
00:07:14,134 --> 00:07:16,134
[ buzzer ]
152
00:07:17,437 --> 00:07:19,804
-Have you seen my wood shoes?
153
00:07:19,807 --> 00:07:21,973
-Yeah, I've seen them.
[ laughter ]
154
00:07:21,975 --> 00:07:23,875
-Oh, I'm sorry.
155
00:07:23,943 --> 00:07:26,445
[ laughter ]
156
00:07:26,513 --> 00:07:29,147
-You bastard.
-[ laughing ] I'm so sorry.
157
00:07:29,216 --> 00:07:31,616
[ laughter ]
158
00:07:31,684 --> 00:07:32,951
I'm so sorry.
159
00:07:33,019 --> 00:07:34,986
[ indistinct talking ]
160
00:07:37,558 --> 00:07:39,090
-Do not go away.
161
00:07:39,158 --> 00:07:41,827
We'll be right back with more
"whose line is it anyway?"
162
00:07:41,895 --> 00:07:43,895
Right after this.
163
00:07:49,869 --> 00:07:51,970
-Welcome back to
"whose line is it anyway?"
164
00:07:51,972 --> 00:07:55,574
Where everything is made up and
the points do not matter a bit.
165
00:07:55,642 --> 00:07:57,408
-What?
-Come on.
166
00:07:57,477 --> 00:08:01,479
-Come on, you knew that.
167
00:08:01,482 --> 00:08:04,349
Now, we're gonna play a game
called "forward rewind"
168
00:08:04,417 --> 00:08:06,050
Featuring all four
of our performers
169
00:08:06,119 --> 00:08:07,785
And starting
with wayne and colin.
170
00:08:07,854 --> 00:08:09,821
So if you'd like
to come on down guys.
171
00:08:09,889 --> 00:08:11,823
[ cheers and applause ]
172
00:08:12,959 --> 00:08:14,926
You guys are going to be
acting out a scene,
173
00:08:14,995 --> 00:08:15,994
But at certain points
of the scene,
174
00:08:16,062 --> 00:08:17,328
You're going to hear a sound
175
00:08:17,331 --> 00:08:19,130
That's going to instruct you
to either move forward
176
00:08:19,198 --> 00:08:21,266
In the scene
or rewind the scene,
177
00:08:21,334 --> 00:08:22,801
And I would like to hear
those sounds now.
178
00:08:22,869 --> 00:08:23,702
Can we hear them?
179
00:08:23,770 --> 00:08:25,470
-Forward.
[ laughter ]
180
00:08:25,539 --> 00:08:28,339
Rewind.
181
00:08:28,342 --> 00:08:29,607
-It's going to be
hard to follow.
182
00:08:29,610 --> 00:08:31,309
[ laughter ]
183
00:08:31,377 --> 00:08:34,412
-So your scene is that, colin,
you are an explorer
184
00:08:34,414 --> 00:08:35,780
And wayne is your guide,
185
00:08:35,848 --> 00:08:40,318
Helping you find
the lost tomb of the aztecs
186
00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:43,855
In the most culturally sensitive
way possible.
187
00:08:43,923 --> 00:08:46,691
Ryan is the furious
aztec high priest...
188
00:08:46,693 --> 00:08:48,059
-Oh.
-...Who wakes up
189
00:08:48,127 --> 00:08:50,228
And puts a curse on you,
and heather rushes in as colin's
190
00:08:50,296 --> 00:08:53,098
Passionate girlfriend afraid
for his life.
191
00:08:53,166 --> 00:08:54,132
Take it away.
192
00:08:56,970 --> 00:08:58,436
[ laughter ]
193
00:08:58,505 --> 00:09:02,273
-I'm the explorer.
Why do you have the horse?
194
00:09:02,342 --> 00:09:06,011
-Lo siento, señor.
Stay right here.
195
00:09:06,079 --> 00:09:07,211
-Let's climb up to the top
of the tree
196
00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:09,147
And then swing in
to the aztec village.
197
00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:10,848
-[ makes whooshing noise ]
198
00:09:10,851 --> 00:09:12,850
-Hold on.
199
00:09:12,853 --> 00:09:15,954
Señor, this is very, very malo.
200
00:09:15,956 --> 00:09:16,955
-It maybe milo.
201
00:09:17,023 --> 00:09:18,790
-No, no.
-What?
202
00:09:18,858 --> 00:09:20,692
-No, no.
-Who goes there?!
203
00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:24,062
-Oh, it's -- it's --
it's el whitey.
204
00:09:24,064 --> 00:09:26,865
[ laughter ]
-[ speaks indistinctly ]
205
00:09:26,933 --> 00:09:30,335
-Yes. Yes.
-Rewind.
206
00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:32,770
-Rewind.
[ speaks indistinctly ]
207
00:09:32,839 --> 00:09:34,372
[ laughter ]
208
00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:39,678
-It's el whitey.
-Who goes there?
209
00:09:39,746 --> 00:09:41,012
-Forward.
210
00:09:41,014 --> 00:09:44,082
-Who goes there?
-It's el whitey.
211
00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:46,684
-Rewind.
-It's el whitey.
212
00:09:46,753 --> 00:09:48,553
-Who goes there?
-Forward.
213
00:09:48,621 --> 00:09:50,355
-Who goes there?
-It's el whitey.
214
00:09:50,357 --> 00:09:53,024
-Yes, I heard you.
-Oh, no.
215
00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:55,293
-What?
-Oh, oh, you are on your own.
216
00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:56,194
-No, you must stay.
217
00:09:56,262 --> 00:09:58,062
-Aah!
218
00:09:58,131 --> 00:09:59,030
[ imitates horse galloping ]
219
00:09:59,032 --> 00:10:00,365
-Rewind.
220
00:10:00,433 --> 00:10:02,400
-[ imitates horse galloping ]
221
00:10:04,504 --> 00:10:05,637
You are on your own.
-Forward.
222
00:10:05,705 --> 00:10:07,305
-You are on your own.
223
00:10:07,307 --> 00:10:09,307
[ imitates horse galloping ]
224
00:10:09,309 --> 00:10:11,843
-He'll never escape
the throw of my spear.
225
00:10:11,911 --> 00:10:14,045
-No.
-[ grunts ]
226
00:10:14,113 --> 00:10:16,381
-Rewind.
227
00:10:16,383 --> 00:10:19,584
-He'll never escape the thing
of my spear.
228
00:10:19,586 --> 00:10:22,186
-Forward.
229
00:10:22,255 --> 00:10:24,722
-He'll never escape the throw
of my spear.
230
00:10:24,791 --> 00:10:27,425
-Oh, no. I got here too late.
231
00:10:27,493 --> 00:10:28,893
-Great. Well, move it away.
232
00:10:28,961 --> 00:10:30,795
-[ grunts ]
233
00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:32,063
-Sleep.
-[ groans ]
234
00:10:32,131 --> 00:10:33,264
-Oh.
235
00:10:33,332 --> 00:10:36,634
-Rewind.
-Sleep.
236
00:10:36,637 --> 00:10:39,704
-Forward.
-Sleep.
237
00:10:39,772 --> 00:10:42,774
-Rewind.
-Sleep.
238
00:10:42,842 --> 00:10:44,409
-Forward.
-Sleep.
239
00:10:44,411 --> 00:10:46,444
[ laughter ]
240
00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:49,414
-That's two down, one to go.
241
00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:51,716
-No, you can't stop me.
I have here the mystical --
242
00:10:51,784 --> 00:10:53,084
Oh, okay.
243
00:10:53,086 --> 00:10:56,354
-Rewind back to the top.
-You can't stop me.
244
00:10:56,422 --> 00:10:58,657
I have the mystical --
245
00:10:58,725 --> 00:11:01,225
-That's two to go.
That's two down, one to go.
246
00:11:01,228 --> 00:11:02,961
-[ groans ]
247
00:11:03,029 --> 00:11:05,196
-Sleep.
-No.
248
00:11:05,264 --> 00:11:08,232
-I got here too late.
249
00:11:08,235 --> 00:11:10,168
-He'll never escape my spear.
250
00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:12,170
-[ imitates horse galloping ]
251
00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:14,672
[ laughter ]
252
00:11:14,675 --> 00:11:16,674
-No.
253
00:11:16,677 --> 00:11:21,680
Oh, no, señor, no.
It's...Whitey.
254
00:11:21,748 --> 00:11:23,147
-Who goes there?
255
00:11:23,216 --> 00:11:24,549
-[ speaks indistinctly ]
256
00:11:24,617 --> 00:11:26,885
-Malo. Muy malo.
257
00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:30,521
[ makes whooshing noise ]
258
00:11:30,590 --> 00:11:32,423
-We'll take the vine up
into the tree.
259
00:11:32,492 --> 00:11:34,525
-[ imitates horse whinnying ]
260
00:11:34,594 --> 00:11:36,594
-Why do you have the horse?
I'm the leader.
261
00:11:36,663 --> 00:11:38,596
[ imitates horse galloping ]
262
00:11:38,665 --> 00:11:40,331
[ laughter ]
263
00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:42,366
[ buzzer ]
264
00:11:42,369 --> 00:11:44,402
[ cheers and applause ]
265
00:11:48,374 --> 00:11:51,109
-That was extraordinary work
all around.
266
00:11:51,177 --> 00:11:55,013
Wayne, you get minus-500 points
for el whitey.
267
00:11:55,081 --> 00:11:58,049
-But what about my culturally-
sensitive mexican character?
268
00:11:58,117 --> 00:12:00,284
-It was super
culturally appropriate.
269
00:12:00,353 --> 00:12:01,419
Totally. Yes.
270
00:12:01,421 --> 00:12:02,954
-El whitey loved it.
271
00:12:03,022 --> 00:12:04,956
[ laughter ]
272
00:12:06,093 --> 00:12:07,558
-Alright, now we're going
to play a game called
273
00:12:07,561 --> 00:12:09,827
"three-headed song,"
and it's for ryan and wayne
274
00:12:09,830 --> 00:12:12,230
Accompanied by laura hall
and linda taylor,
275
00:12:12,298 --> 00:12:15,166
So come on down.
276
00:12:15,168 --> 00:12:17,835
And please welcome to the stage
our celebrity guest,
277
00:12:17,904 --> 00:12:19,837
Kevin mchale.
278
00:12:19,906 --> 00:12:21,873
[ cheers and applause ]
279
00:12:26,646 --> 00:12:29,013
So, kevin, if you could join
wayne and ryan,
280
00:12:29,081 --> 00:12:30,848
The three of you
are going to link together
281
00:12:30,917 --> 00:12:33,251
To form a very strange
three-headed singer
282
00:12:33,319 --> 00:12:34,852
And I'm sorry about ryan.
283
00:12:34,921 --> 00:12:37,688
There's nothing
we can do about that.
284
00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:40,358
They're going to be singing
a song one word at a time.
285
00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:42,426
So, what we need is a suggestion
from the audience
286
00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:45,196
To complete a song
from the musical called
287
00:12:45,198 --> 00:12:48,599
"I love you for your 'blank.'"
288
00:12:48,668 --> 00:12:51,603
-Teeth!
-"I love you for your teeth."
289
00:12:52,972 --> 00:12:55,306
So the song is called
"I love you for your teeth."
290
00:12:55,308 --> 00:12:57,308
Take it away,
three-headed singer.
291
00:12:57,310 --> 00:13:04,248
♪♪
292
00:13:04,317 --> 00:13:06,284
-[ humming ]
293
00:13:09,756 --> 00:13:12,390
-♪ smile ♪
-♪ once ♪
294
00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:13,758
-♪ more ♪
-♪ please ♪
295
00:13:13,760 --> 00:13:16,928
-♪ smile ♪
-♪ sm... ♪
296
00:13:16,996 --> 00:13:18,896
-♪ I'll ♪
-♪ let ♪
297
00:13:18,965 --> 00:13:20,932
-♪ you ♪
-♪ shine ♪
298
00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:22,934
-Mm.
299
00:13:23,002 --> 00:13:24,268
♪ when ♪
-♪ you ♪
300
00:13:24,337 --> 00:13:26,170
-♪ sparkle ♪
-♪ I ♪
301
00:13:26,173 --> 00:13:27,639
-♪ don't ♪
-♪ want ♪
302
00:13:27,707 --> 00:13:29,340
-♪ anything ♪
-♪ but ♪
303
00:13:29,408 --> 00:13:30,875
-♪ you ♪
-♪ and ♪
304
00:13:30,943 --> 00:13:33,744
-♪ your ♪
-♪ bicuspids ♪
305
00:13:33,813 --> 00:13:35,613
[ laughter ]
306
00:13:35,681 --> 00:13:38,716
-♪ gleaming ♪
-♪ at ♪
307
00:13:38,785 --> 00:13:42,153
-♪ your ♪
-♪ face ♪
308
00:13:42,221 --> 00:13:44,823
-♪ I ♪
-♪ bask ♪
309
00:13:44,891 --> 00:13:46,724
-♪ in ♪
-♪ your ♪
310
00:13:46,726 --> 00:13:50,661
-♪ taste ♪
-♪ if ♪
311
00:13:50,730 --> 00:13:52,897
-♪ you ♪
-♪ want ♪
312
00:13:52,965 --> 00:13:54,799
-♪ my ♪
313
00:13:54,867 --> 00:13:57,268
-♪ teeth ♪
-♪ come ♪
314
00:13:57,270 --> 00:13:59,470
-♪ closer ♪
-♪ to ♪
315
00:13:59,538 --> 00:14:02,006
-♪ me ♪
-♪ I ♪
316
00:14:02,074 --> 00:14:04,175
-♪ love ♪
-♪ your ♪
317
00:14:04,243 --> 00:14:05,776
-♪ teeth ♪
-♪ so ♪
318
00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:07,478
-♪ white ♪
-♪ and ♪
319
00:14:07,546 --> 00:14:10,348
-♪ gleaming ♪
320
00:14:10,416 --> 00:14:11,682
-♪ veneers ♪
321
00:14:11,685 --> 00:14:13,818
-Yes. Yes.
322
00:14:13,887 --> 00:14:16,354
-♪ when ♪
323
00:14:16,422 --> 00:14:19,290
-♪ what? ♪
-♪ when ♪
324
00:14:19,359 --> 00:14:22,026
-♪ what? ♪
[ laughter ]
325
00:14:22,094 --> 00:14:23,527
-♪ I'm ♪
326
00:14:23,596 --> 00:14:25,163
-♪ so ♪
327
00:14:25,231 --> 00:14:27,432
-♪ in ♪
-♪ love ♪
328
00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:28,499
-♪ with ♪
-♪ your ♪
329
00:14:28,568 --> 00:14:29,934
-♪ teeth ♪
-♪ in ♪
330
00:14:30,002 --> 00:14:32,737
-♪ love ♪
-[ sings indistinctly ]
331
00:14:32,805 --> 00:14:34,772
-♪ with ♪
-♪ your ♪
332
00:14:34,774 --> 00:14:36,774
-♪ gums ♪
-♪ and ♪
333
00:14:36,776 --> 00:14:40,378
-♪ teeth ♪
-♪ teeth ♪
334
00:14:40,446 --> 00:14:42,447
[ cheers and applause ]
[ buzzer ]
335
00:14:46,118 --> 00:14:49,687
-Kevin mchale, everybody.
336
00:14:49,755 --> 00:14:53,057
[ cheers and applause ]
337
00:14:53,059 --> 00:14:55,860
We will be right back with more
"whose line is it anyway?"
338
00:14:55,862 --> 00:14:57,762
Right after this.
339
00:15:03,803 --> 00:15:05,870
-Welcome back to
"whose line is it anyway?"
340
00:15:05,939 --> 00:15:08,839
Where everything is made up
and the points don't matter.
341
00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:11,075
Now, we're going to play
a game called "greatest hits."
342
00:15:11,077 --> 00:15:13,678
This is a game for colin,
ryan, and wayne
343
00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:16,480
With the help of laura hall
and linda taylor.
344
00:15:16,549 --> 00:15:17,749
[ cheers and applause ]
345
00:15:17,817 --> 00:15:21,352
Now, ryan and colin
are two tv voice-over artists
346
00:15:21,420 --> 00:15:23,454
Talking about the latest
compilation album,
347
00:15:23,522 --> 00:15:25,757
And wayne is going to be
singing snippets of the song.
348
00:15:25,825 --> 00:15:28,492
So I need a suggestion
from the audience here.
349
00:15:28,561 --> 00:15:31,295
So could you give me a place
where teenagers hang out?
350
00:15:31,364 --> 00:15:33,765
[ shouting suggestions ]
351
00:15:33,833 --> 00:15:35,366
The mall.
352
00:15:35,368 --> 00:15:39,637
So, let's hear all about this
new hit album called "the mall."
353
00:15:39,639 --> 00:15:41,739
-Alright.
-Take it away.
354
00:15:41,808 --> 00:15:45,843
-Hi. We'll be back...To watch
two bears being shaved.
355
00:15:45,911 --> 00:15:47,645
[ laughter ]
356
00:15:47,714 --> 00:15:49,847
We're having trouble getting
programming right now, so --
357
00:15:49,915 --> 00:15:51,315
-No, I'm enjoying it.
-Yeah.
358
00:15:51,384 --> 00:15:52,650
-And the fact that they're
shaved and they're called
359
00:15:52,718 --> 00:15:55,753
Bears is ironic.
-Weird.
360
00:15:55,821 --> 00:15:57,121
But that's not
why we're here.
361
00:15:57,123 --> 00:15:58,189
-Why are we here, col?
362
00:15:58,191 --> 00:15:59,924
-We're here to sell you a cd.
363
00:15:59,926 --> 00:16:03,794
An amazing cd with songs
about the mall.
364
00:16:03,797 --> 00:16:07,798
-Two songs on 84 cds.
[ laughter ]
365
00:16:07,801 --> 00:16:10,267
-Because it's a special.
366
00:16:10,336 --> 00:16:11,803
[ laughter ]
367
00:16:11,871 --> 00:16:13,404
-Disco.
368
00:16:13,473 --> 00:16:15,373
Sorry.
-That's alright.
369
00:16:15,441 --> 00:16:17,208
-I'm so sorry.
370
00:16:17,276 --> 00:16:19,410
-Don't get your disco balls
in a knot.
371
00:16:19,412 --> 00:16:23,114
-Hey, you know, I used to wear
six-inch heels,
372
00:16:23,182 --> 00:16:24,348
Which made me 8'2".
373
00:16:24,351 --> 00:16:26,851
-Wow.
-Yes.
374
00:16:26,919 --> 00:16:29,687
When I think disco hits
and I think about malls,
375
00:16:29,756 --> 00:16:31,789
I just think of me
wanting to get back to my car
376
00:16:31,857 --> 00:16:34,692
And not being able
to find my way there.
377
00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:37,495
It's that disco hit,
"can't find my way out."
378
00:16:37,563 --> 00:16:42,633
♪♪
379
00:16:42,635 --> 00:16:47,705
♪♪
380
00:16:47,774 --> 00:16:49,974
-♪ well, I came in the store
today ♪
381
00:16:49,976 --> 00:16:52,209
♪ trying to find myself a gift
382
00:16:52,278 --> 00:16:54,578
♪ and I should not
have driven myself ♪
383
00:16:54,647 --> 00:16:56,380
♪ and not turned down a lift ♪
384
00:16:56,383 --> 00:16:58,249
♪ and I said, "alright ♪
385
00:16:58,317 --> 00:17:00,518
♪ I'm going
to park my car right here ♪
386
00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:02,253
♪ and I'll use a landmark" ♪
387
00:17:02,255 --> 00:17:05,256
♪ but damn, it's dark,
and I can't find it anywhere ♪
388
00:17:05,324 --> 00:17:07,091
♪ I'm stuck, stuck, stuck ♪
389
00:17:07,159 --> 00:17:09,593
♪ I'm out of luck ♪
390
00:17:09,596 --> 00:17:11,729
♪ where's my truck? ♪
391
00:17:11,798 --> 00:17:13,697
♪ damn, what's up? ♪
392
00:17:13,766 --> 00:17:15,933
♪ because I'm stuck,
stuck, stuck ♪
393
00:17:16,001 --> 00:17:16,967
♪ I'm stuck ♪
394
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:18,069
♪ is it stuck? ♪
395
00:17:18,071 --> 00:17:19,170
-♪ can't find my way out ♪
396
00:17:19,238 --> 00:17:21,272
-♪ I can't find my way ♪
397
00:17:21,340 --> 00:17:22,873
♪ ooh ♪
398
00:17:22,942 --> 00:17:25,443
♪ is it there,
there, there, there? ♪
399
00:17:25,511 --> 00:17:27,344
♪ tell me where,
tell me where ♪
400
00:17:27,347 --> 00:17:29,747
♪ is it there,
there, there, there? ♪
401
00:17:29,749 --> 00:17:31,182
♪ tell me where ♪
402
00:17:31,250 --> 00:17:33,484
♪ because I can't find my way ♪
403
00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:35,586
♪ I don't know
which way to go ♪
404
00:17:35,654 --> 00:17:37,889
♪ because I'm stuck ♪
405
00:17:37,957 --> 00:17:39,624
♪ I'm stuck ♪
406
00:17:39,692 --> 00:17:42,526
♪ and I believe the title is ♪
407
00:17:42,595 --> 00:17:46,898
♪ "'cause I can't find my way" ♪
408
00:17:48,234 --> 00:17:50,367
[ cheers and applause ]
409
00:17:50,436 --> 00:17:53,037
-Beautiful. Oh, my gosh.
410
00:17:53,105 --> 00:17:54,839
Oh.
-It's wonderful.
411
00:17:54,841 --> 00:17:57,374
This cd comes with
the interactive feature
412
00:17:57,377 --> 00:17:59,076
Where you can finish
the title of the song
413
00:17:59,079 --> 00:18:00,811
In case the singer forgets it.
414
00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:04,281
[ laughter ]
415
00:18:04,350 --> 00:18:05,916
You know, our next artist,
416
00:18:05,919 --> 00:18:07,385
I know, is a big favorite
of yours because we went
417
00:18:07,453 --> 00:18:08,986
To one of her concerts,
remember, last year?
418
00:18:09,055 --> 00:18:10,020
-Oh, yes. Yes.
-And I'm talking, of course,
419
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:12,556
About the inimitable
lady gaga...
420
00:18:12,625 --> 00:18:15,359
[ cheers and applause ]
421
00:18:15,427 --> 00:18:18,028
...Who must be fun on a date
'cause you could eat her dress.
422
00:18:18,097 --> 00:18:20,731
-Oh, yeah.
Yeah, she was born that way.
423
00:18:20,733 --> 00:18:22,566
-Yes.
[ laughter ]
424
00:18:22,635 --> 00:18:26,471
Anyway, listen to this
lady gaga song,
425
00:18:26,539 --> 00:18:28,473
"there's no smoking here."
426
00:18:28,541 --> 00:18:32,410
♪♪
427
00:18:32,478 --> 00:18:34,211
-Alright, you.
428
00:18:34,214 --> 00:18:36,447
All my monsters.
429
00:18:36,515 --> 00:18:39,684
I want you to be healthy
inside and out.
430
00:18:39,752 --> 00:18:41,886
So listen to what
I've got to say.
431
00:18:43,722 --> 00:18:46,490
♪ now, deep inside you
there's a lung or two ♪
432
00:18:46,493 --> 00:18:48,025
♪ well, I hope there's two ♪
433
00:18:48,093 --> 00:18:50,461
♪ 'cause that would be really
screwed up if there was not ♪
434
00:18:50,529 --> 00:18:54,431
♪ hey, I've seen you outside,
and there is no joke ♪
435
00:18:54,500 --> 00:18:57,701
♪ inside of these stores
there's no room to smoke ♪
436
00:18:57,704 --> 00:18:58,936
♪ you can't smoke ♪
437
00:18:59,004 --> 00:19:01,038
♪ no smoking in here ♪
438
00:19:01,107 --> 00:19:05,143
♪ because, now,
smoke is what I fear ♪
439
00:19:05,211 --> 00:19:08,246
♪ you take your cigarette,
that's it, and stomp it ♪
440
00:19:08,314 --> 00:19:12,249
♪ I'm asthmatic,
so nobody's smoking here ♪
441
00:19:12,252 --> 00:19:14,451
♪ no, I don't want you to ♪
[ panting ]
442
00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:17,155
♪ no, no ♪
[ panting ] ♪ no, no ♪
443
00:19:17,223 --> 00:19:19,056
♪ that's what'll happen
if you smoke, smoke ♪
444
00:19:19,058 --> 00:19:20,925
♪ rah ♪
445
00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:22,260
♪ monsters don't smoke ♪
446
00:19:22,328 --> 00:19:24,628
♪ they go, "rah" ♪
447
00:19:24,697 --> 00:19:25,996
♪ monsters don't smoke ♪
448
00:19:25,999 --> 00:19:27,932
♪ they go, "ah" ♪
449
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,433
♪ don't smoke ♪
450
00:19:29,501 --> 00:19:31,602
♪ just dress like this ♪
451
00:19:31,604 --> 00:19:33,537
♪ it kind of balances out ♪
452
00:19:33,606 --> 00:19:35,439
♪ don't smoke ♪
453
00:19:35,507 --> 00:19:37,174
♪ okay, I'm done ♪
454
00:19:37,177 --> 00:19:39,443
♪ time for a smoke ♪
I mean, no.
455
00:19:39,511 --> 00:19:41,312
[ laughter ]
456
00:19:41,380 --> 00:19:43,347
[ buzzer ]
457
00:19:44,150 --> 00:19:45,549
-Don't go away.
458
00:19:45,618 --> 00:19:48,019
We'll be right back with more
"whose line is it anyway?"
459
00:19:48,087 --> 00:19:51,055
And I'll tell you
who won right after this.
460
00:19:56,595 --> 00:19:58,395
-Welcome back to
"whose line is it anyway?"
461
00:19:58,464 --> 00:20:01,098
Where the winner of tonight's
show is all four of you,
462
00:20:01,100 --> 00:20:04,168
And I can't wait to reward you
by asking you to join
463
00:20:04,237 --> 00:20:06,470
Our star guest kevin mchale
in reading the credits out
464
00:20:06,538 --> 00:20:10,407
As if you were all teenagers
arguing over relationships.
465
00:20:10,476 --> 00:20:12,143
Thank you and goodnight.
466
00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:14,712
[ cheers and applause ]
467
00:20:14,714 --> 00:20:16,914
-I'm really tired of --
-it wasn't my fault.
468
00:20:16,982 --> 00:20:19,216
-Yeah, it was your fault.
-It was dan talking, and jimmy.
469
00:20:19,219 --> 00:20:20,818
Oh, and especially wayne.
470
00:20:20,886 --> 00:20:22,019
-That isn't true.
-I'm on instagram.
471
00:20:22,087 --> 00:20:23,187
-Well, look at mark leveson.
472
00:20:23,255 --> 00:20:24,722
-Lower the phone.
You're on television.
473
00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:27,224
-Why doesn't geraldine call me?
-Sarah mcharry and I,
474
00:20:27,227 --> 00:20:28,993
We're the only ones that aren't
on twitter. I'm not on twitter.
475
00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:31,195
-Whatever. You should get
twitter. Everybody has twitter.
476
00:20:31,263 --> 00:20:33,330
Because heather and kevin
and linda and neil,
477
00:20:33,399 --> 00:20:35,366
They all know what you've done.
-I will talk to jimmy sprague
478
00:20:35,434 --> 00:20:36,867
In person
if I want to talk to somebody.
479
00:20:36,935 --> 00:20:38,469
-And juliet, especially juliet,
was so pissed at you.
480
00:20:38,537 --> 00:20:40,604
-Nobody understands me.
481
00:20:40,673 --> 00:20:42,973
-I'm too old to be a teenager.
-Michael -- michael --
482
00:20:43,042 --> 00:20:47,111
-Don't tell me about michael.
We all know about michael.
483
00:20:47,179 --> 00:20:49,113
[ cheers and applause ]
484
00:20:49,181 --> 00:20:51,115
-- Captions by vitac --