1
00:00:02,369 --> 00:00:04,770
(cheering & applause)
2
00:00:04,838 --> 00:00:08,540
Or, just port, as a
lot of you guys call it.
3
00:00:08,609 --> 00:00:10,742
The drinking town
with a fishing problem.
4
00:00:10,811 --> 00:00:12,744
Woo!
(applause)
5
00:00:12,813 --> 00:00:15,581
Here in port, kettle creek
runs between
6
00:00:15,649 --> 00:00:17,649
The two sides of your town.
7
00:00:17,717 --> 00:00:20,018
On one side,
there's warm beaches,
8
00:00:20,087 --> 00:00:23,321
Cold beers,
caesars, margaritas.
9
00:00:23,324 --> 00:00:25,857
Then on the other side,
you've got fine dining,
10
00:00:25,860 --> 00:00:28,093
Boutique shops, the theatre.
11
00:00:28,162 --> 00:00:30,028
(cheering & applause)
12
00:00:30,097 --> 00:00:32,798
Port is the perfect name.
You're a little bit like port -
13
00:00:32,866 --> 00:00:34,666
High in alcohol,
but kind of fancy.
14
00:00:34,735 --> 00:00:37,269
(laughing)
15
00:00:37,271 --> 00:00:40,205
One big problem now
that's facing this town is
16
00:00:40,273 --> 00:00:43,642
Literally keeping those two
sides from coming together.
17
00:00:43,710 --> 00:00:45,877
The problem now in
port stanley is the people
18
00:00:45,880 --> 00:00:48,180
Are great, it's just your
bridge is a bit stuck up.
19
00:00:48,248 --> 00:00:50,982
(laughing)
20
00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:53,385
When you grow up in a
small town in newfoundland,
21
00:00:53,453 --> 00:00:56,054
You see the people have a sense
of humour about hard times.
22
00:00:56,057 --> 00:00:57,356
Check, check...
23
00:00:57,424 --> 00:00:59,224
I turned that into a
career and hit the road.
24
00:00:59,226 --> 00:01:01,093
[mc] mr. Johnny harris!
25
00:01:01,161 --> 00:01:02,828
Now I'm on a mission to
find the funny in the
26
00:01:02,896 --> 00:01:04,563
Places you'd least expect it,
27
00:01:04,565 --> 00:01:07,399
Canada's struggling
small towns.
28
00:01:07,467 --> 00:01:08,967
Towns that are
against the ropes,
29
00:01:08,969 --> 00:01:10,502
But hanging in there.
30
00:01:10,570 --> 00:01:13,405
Still laughing in
the face of adversity.
31
00:01:13,407 --> 00:01:15,474
This is port stanley,
ontario.
32
00:01:15,542 --> 00:01:20,846
♪
33
00:01:20,848 --> 00:01:23,849
This lake erie town was
built upon a fishery.
34
00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:25,684
People are very
proud of that here.
35
00:01:25,752 --> 00:01:28,554
This town, it's sort of like
a mix to me of like
36
00:01:28,622 --> 00:01:31,690
East coast fishing town
mixed with this sort of like
37
00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:35,127
Caribbean...
Beach party vibe.
38
00:01:35,129 --> 00:01:38,196
(cheering & applause)
39
00:01:38,265 --> 00:01:40,599
It's almost a bit like
newfoundland
40
00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:41,867
Mixed with jamaica...
41
00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:43,135
(laughing)
42
00:01:43,203 --> 00:01:44,503
And that's a
winning combination.
43
00:01:44,571 --> 00:01:46,037
That gave us screech, okay?
44
00:01:46,040 --> 00:01:47,606
(laughing)
45
00:01:47,674 --> 00:01:49,841
People here are laid back
like in jamaica.
46
00:01:49,910 --> 00:01:52,277
People here are
feeling irie.
47
00:01:52,345 --> 00:01:54,079
Erie, sorry, lake erie.
Erie!
48
00:01:54,148 --> 00:01:56,381
(laughing)
49
00:01:56,449 --> 00:02:00,485
♪
50
00:02:00,554 --> 00:02:02,287
The fishing,
as I understand,
51
00:02:02,355 --> 00:02:04,256
Has declined in
recent decades.
52
00:02:04,258 --> 00:02:07,292
And port has really
leaned into tourism.
53
00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:10,629
You still see the fishing tugs
steam out of port stanley,
54
00:02:10,631 --> 00:02:13,298
But far fewer of them
than back in the heyday.
55
00:02:13,366 --> 00:02:15,934
To find out how the local
fishing tradition kind of
56
00:02:16,002 --> 00:02:21,907
Got gutted in port stanley,
I had a chat with marna berry.
57
00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:24,276
(cheering & applause)
58
00:02:24,344 --> 00:02:26,678
Used to be, but as
the daughter of one,
59
00:02:26,746 --> 00:02:28,246
She's very proud.
60
00:02:28,249 --> 00:02:31,116
Port stanley has always been
a commercial fishing village.
61
00:02:31,118 --> 00:02:32,317
Right from the beginning.
62
00:02:32,385 --> 00:02:34,252
What are people
catching mostly?
63
00:02:34,255 --> 00:02:36,288
Perch and pickerel.
64
00:02:36,356 --> 00:02:37,489
When I was growing up,
65
00:02:37,557 --> 00:02:39,591
There was 15 fish
tugs in the village,
66
00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:42,661
And all those families depended
on the commercial fishing.
67
00:02:42,729 --> 00:02:44,630
She has fond memories
of a childhood that,
68
00:02:44,698 --> 00:02:46,265
To me, sounded
like a lot of work.
69
00:02:46,333 --> 00:02:48,166
One of my
earliest memories is,
70
00:02:48,169 --> 00:02:52,137
When I was 5 years old,
bagging corks into burlap bags.
71
00:02:52,139 --> 00:02:54,005
If you said, "can I have
20 bucks?" they'd go,
72
00:02:54,074 --> 00:02:57,109
"sure, go the shanty
and make some nuts."
73
00:02:57,177 --> 00:02:59,444
- And earn your 20 bucks.
- Yeah, absolutely.
74
00:02:59,512 --> 00:03:01,213
Keep in mind,
folks, when it's family,
75
00:03:01,281 --> 00:03:03,415
It's not child labour.
It's chores.
76
00:03:05,752 --> 00:03:07,686
And then, it kind of when to
a next level when my parents
77
00:03:07,754 --> 00:03:10,388
Built a processing
plant in our yard.
78
00:03:10,457 --> 00:03:11,890
Is that right?
79
00:03:11,958 --> 00:03:14,960
So, my job was to take pales
of fish and put them into a
80
00:03:14,962 --> 00:03:17,762
Repurposed potato peeler,
put on the timer,
81
00:03:17,831 --> 00:03:20,098
5 minutes later you
have rinsed, scaled fish.
82
00:03:20,100 --> 00:03:21,566
She said as they got older,
83
00:03:21,635 --> 00:03:23,602
They would do more
important jobs...
84
00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:27,172
Then eventually, I graduated
up to fileting and, of course,
85
00:03:27,174 --> 00:03:28,940
More lucrative because
you're paid by the pound.
86
00:03:29,009 --> 00:03:30,175
So, you're
handy with a knife?
87
00:03:30,243 --> 00:03:32,911
- I am. (laughs)
- yeah.
88
00:03:32,979 --> 00:03:34,947
The girls would be
gutting the fish,
89
00:03:35,015 --> 00:03:37,249
Making the filets so,
careful, fellas,
90
00:03:37,317 --> 00:03:39,318
Port stanley girls
are handy with a knife.
91
00:03:40,787 --> 00:03:42,921
They won't rip
your heart out...
92
00:03:42,923 --> 00:03:44,256
[audience]
they'll cut it out.
93
00:03:44,324 --> 00:03:46,258
They'll do it with
a careful incision.
94
00:03:49,095 --> 00:03:51,797
My brother started fishing
when he was 12 years old,
95
00:03:51,865 --> 00:03:53,365
Full-time, in the summer.
96
00:03:53,433 --> 00:03:56,935
At the age of 12, she said,
kids would be out in the boats--
97
00:03:56,937 --> 00:03:58,270
Well, the boys would
be out in the boats
98
00:03:58,338 --> 00:03:59,338
Helping fish, yeah.
99
00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:00,939
Pulling the fish
out of the water,
100
00:04:00,941 --> 00:04:03,875
That's too much for a girl's
delicate constitution.
101
00:04:03,943 --> 00:04:05,944
Peeling their skin off and
cutting their guts out...
102
00:04:06,013 --> 00:04:07,279
(laughing)
103
00:04:07,347 --> 00:04:09,414
That's like a
debutant's ball.
104
00:04:10,617 --> 00:04:13,885
The quotas were
brought into effect in 1984.
105
00:04:13,887 --> 00:04:17,789
Part of the decline in the
local fishing was due to
106
00:04:17,857 --> 00:04:21,426
Quotas that were
introduced in the 1980s.
107
00:04:21,428 --> 00:04:23,562
With that, came
government inspectors.
108
00:04:23,630 --> 00:04:26,164
You know, you have to fill out
daily paperwork and then,
109
00:04:26,166 --> 00:04:30,101
You know, say exactly how
much of everything you got.
110
00:04:30,104 --> 00:04:32,704
The fishermen,
not so affectionately,
111
00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:35,006
Referred to the ministry
of natural resources
112
00:04:35,075 --> 00:04:36,641
As the nature narcs.
113
00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:39,744
My father was fined once for
having a salmon that was
114
00:04:39,747 --> 00:04:42,347
An incidental catch,
dead in the nets.
115
00:04:42,415 --> 00:04:44,949
But, because it wasn't
reported and he was just
116
00:04:45,018 --> 00:04:46,385
Bringing it home to
the family to eat...
117
00:04:46,453 --> 00:04:49,854
Suddenly, you got guys in
uniform with side arms
118
00:04:49,923 --> 00:04:52,257
Coming on the boat,
looking around.
119
00:04:52,259 --> 00:04:55,527
Suddenly, it's like an episode
of border security, right?
120
00:04:55,529 --> 00:04:56,728
(laughing)
121
00:04:56,797 --> 00:04:58,664
Like you're some sort of
illegal fish smuggler.
122
00:04:58,732 --> 00:05:01,633
- (laughing)
- pablo escargot-bar.
123
00:05:01,701 --> 00:05:03,134
(laughing)
124
00:05:03,203 --> 00:05:05,770
And these inspections
continue to this day.
125
00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:07,305
It's interesting
times we live in.
126
00:05:07,374 --> 00:05:08,940
I wonder if it,
an inspection,
127
00:05:08,942 --> 00:05:10,475
You know,
would they sort of be,
128
00:05:10,543 --> 00:05:14,312
"hey, chief, I think I found
something illegal on this boat.
129
00:05:14,381 --> 00:05:15,947
Underneath that
bag of marijuana,
130
00:05:16,015 --> 00:05:17,582
I think it's a salmon."
131
00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:33,431
[johnny] you know, there are
two sides to port stanley.
132
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:35,834
I went from the coffee
side to the beer side,
133
00:05:35,902 --> 00:05:37,669
Or rather, the pier side.
134
00:05:37,737 --> 00:05:40,038
I went to the pierside pub
and had a chat with
135
00:05:40,040 --> 00:05:42,040
The owners brent and
bernice noels.
136
00:05:42,108 --> 00:05:47,178
(cheering & applause)
137
00:05:47,247 --> 00:05:49,180
Brent and bernice have owned
the pihas brought aboutyears,sr
138
00:05:49,183 --> 00:05:51,082
A problem they had
not faced before.
139
00:05:51,151 --> 00:05:52,283
The bridge...
140
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:55,387
Beautiful bridge built in
the 1930s and
141
00:05:55,455 --> 00:05:58,190
It's going through full
repair and restoration,
142
00:05:58,258 --> 00:05:59,724
Which is gonna take a while.
143
00:05:59,727 --> 00:06:01,459
[brent] when the people
decided to work on it,
144
00:06:01,462 --> 00:06:03,728
We figured it was
gonna be 14 months.
145
00:06:03,797 --> 00:06:05,764
So, we're expecting it
to be done
146
00:06:05,832 --> 00:06:07,465
Halfway through
next summer.
147
00:06:07,468 --> 00:06:09,401
We knew it was gonna
impact our business.
148
00:06:09,469 --> 00:06:12,270
[johnny] normally, tourists
could go do some shopping,
149
00:06:12,338 --> 00:06:14,272
Have a coffee on
one side, 5 minutes,
150
00:06:14,340 --> 00:06:15,473
Stroll over the bridge,
151
00:06:15,542 --> 00:06:17,976
They could be at the
beaches and the bars.
152
00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:20,412
The trouble for
tourism now is,
153
00:06:20,480 --> 00:06:24,182
To walk up and around
takes about half an hour.
154
00:06:24,250 --> 00:06:26,484
Walking from one
side to the other,
155
00:06:26,553 --> 00:06:28,887
It is a long walk.
156
00:06:28,955 --> 00:06:30,622
You know, and even driving,
you can't do that
157
00:06:30,690 --> 00:06:31,623
'cause you have to drive home.
158
00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:32,657
Yeah, yeah.
159
00:06:32,725 --> 00:06:35,026
With the bridge,
you know, half...
160
00:06:35,028 --> 00:06:36,661
Half way up...
161
00:06:36,729 --> 00:06:39,464
(laughing)
162
00:06:39,532 --> 00:06:42,167
It's just another good time
ruined by a partial erection.
163
00:06:44,037 --> 00:06:46,938
Happens to the best of us,
happens to the best of us.
164
00:06:46,940 --> 00:06:50,241
If people kind of miss out
on coming to the party side,
165
00:06:50,310 --> 00:06:52,977
We wanted to come up with
a way to bring them
166
00:06:53,046 --> 00:06:54,712
From that side to
this this side.
167
00:06:54,715 --> 00:06:57,215
♪
168
00:06:57,283 --> 00:07:01,753
Brent went out and got
himself a stretch limo...
169
00:07:01,821 --> 00:07:03,822
(laughing)
170
00:07:03,890 --> 00:07:08,259
With burgundy vinyl top and
matching custom flame job.
171
00:07:08,328 --> 00:07:12,096
If you happen to be staying on
the other side of kettle creek,
172
00:07:12,165 --> 00:07:16,267
He will personally drive
you over to the pierside.
173
00:07:16,270 --> 00:07:18,603
And then once you've drank
and danced your night away,
174
00:07:18,605 --> 00:07:21,740
He will personally give
you the number for a taxi.
175
00:07:23,810 --> 00:07:25,610
You've already got a
free ride in a fancy car,
176
00:07:25,678 --> 00:07:27,278
Don't worry
about getting home.
177
00:07:27,347 --> 00:07:29,147
Cross that bridge
when you get to it.
178
00:07:32,085 --> 00:07:34,553
(applause)
179
00:07:34,621 --> 00:07:41,460
♪
180
00:07:41,528 --> 00:07:45,130
If you want a hot dog
with all the fixings from a
181
00:07:45,198 --> 00:07:48,867
Fixture of port stanley,
a local institution,
182
00:07:48,935 --> 00:07:50,735
I'm talking about
the longest running,
183
00:07:50,803 --> 00:07:52,838
Busiest business
on the beach,
184
00:07:52,906 --> 00:07:55,039
I'm talking about mackies.
185
00:07:55,042 --> 00:07:57,141
I had a chat with greg lale!
186
00:07:57,144 --> 00:07:58,943
(cheering & applause)
187
00:07:58,946 --> 00:08:00,979
Mackies has been
here since 1911.
188
00:08:01,047 --> 00:08:02,881
For people around here,
mackies is something
189
00:08:02,949 --> 00:08:04,449
That's been there
their whole life.
190
00:08:04,518 --> 00:08:06,217
[johnny] greg filled me in
on the history.
191
00:08:06,220 --> 00:08:09,787
He said mackies has been
in operation for over 100 years.
192
00:08:09,790 --> 00:08:12,056
Let me put that
in perspective.
193
00:08:12,125 --> 00:08:14,793
The first people to buy
french fries at mackies,
194
00:08:14,861 --> 00:08:16,427
French fries were new.
195
00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:18,463
(laughing)
196
00:08:18,532 --> 00:08:21,332
Like a new type of food.
197
00:08:21,335 --> 00:08:23,735
George mackie went to a
convention to learn how to
198
00:08:23,803 --> 00:08:25,570
Make this new thing
called french fries.
199
00:08:25,638 --> 00:08:27,005
- Is that right?
- Yeah, that's right.
200
00:08:27,007 --> 00:08:28,439
- Do you know where he went?
- It was in chicago.
201
00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:29,407
- Really?
- Yep.
202
00:08:29,476 --> 00:08:30,508
That's a long way to go.
203
00:08:30,577 --> 00:08:32,277
French fries are
pretty straight forward.
204
00:08:32,279 --> 00:08:34,612
Do you go all the way to
chicago and some guy's like,
205
00:08:34,615 --> 00:08:37,749
"yeah, really, you just
cut 'em in skinny strips and
206
00:08:37,817 --> 00:08:40,085
Throw 'em in the deep fryer,
honest to god."
207
00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:43,621
♪
208
00:08:43,624 --> 00:08:45,790
When greg's family
took over mackies,
209
00:08:45,858 --> 00:08:47,292
It was doing well.
210
00:08:47,294 --> 00:08:50,929
Making food and drinks with
highly secretive recipes...
211
00:08:50,997 --> 00:08:52,463
[audience] (laughing)
212
00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:53,965
[johnny] I am, of course,
talking about the
213
00:08:54,033 --> 00:08:55,867
Orangeade and the fry sauce.
214
00:08:55,935 --> 00:08:59,203
(cheering & applause)
215
00:08:59,272 --> 00:09:00,338
Orangeade?
216
00:09:00,407 --> 00:09:01,906
It'll be just like
you bit into an orange.
217
00:09:01,909 --> 00:09:04,475
[johnny] I feel like I have a
fairly sophisticated palate.
218
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:07,512
I don't want to sound all like
anthony bourdain here...
219
00:09:07,581 --> 00:09:10,214
But to me, the orangeade
almost tasted like
220
00:09:10,283 --> 00:09:12,116
Lemonade but with oranges.
221
00:09:12,119 --> 00:09:13,985
It really did.
It really did.
222
00:09:14,053 --> 00:09:16,121
I really found that.
223
00:09:16,189 --> 00:09:18,423
Yeah, it's good.
Nice and...
224
00:09:18,491 --> 00:09:20,291
Very refreshing,
nice and icy.
225
00:09:20,294 --> 00:09:22,727
People say, "oh, can I get
the syrup that you make that
226
00:09:22,795 --> 00:09:24,629
Out of for a party
that I'm having?"
227
00:09:24,697 --> 00:09:26,464
And I say,
"it's not a syrup."
228
00:09:26,466 --> 00:09:28,533
[johnny] the other
secret recipe, of course,
229
00:09:28,602 --> 00:09:31,769
Is the fry sauce, and
I'm told that is addictive.
230
00:09:31,838 --> 00:09:34,739
(cheering)
231
00:09:34,807 --> 00:09:37,075
Yeah, not just the fish'll
get hooked around here.
232
00:09:39,646 --> 00:09:41,579
Some people use so much
of it that they have
233
00:09:41,582 --> 00:09:43,181
A little bit of fries
with their sauce.
234
00:09:43,249 --> 00:09:46,284
- Right, right.
- New schoolers dip it in.
235
00:09:46,353 --> 00:09:48,887
The old schoolers you can spot
because they just pump it
236
00:09:48,955 --> 00:09:51,856
On top, pump it on top 'til
it's running down the sides,
237
00:09:51,924 --> 00:09:54,125
And then they come up to pump
a little more in the bottom.
238
00:09:54,193 --> 00:09:55,793
[johnny]
people who like it...
239
00:09:55,862 --> 00:09:57,528
Love it.
They get addicted.
240
00:09:57,531 --> 00:09:59,030
They come back
their whole lives,
241
00:09:59,098 --> 00:10:01,032
Not just their lives,
their parents,
242
00:10:01,034 --> 00:10:03,001
Their grandparents
have been hooked on this.
243
00:10:03,069 --> 00:10:04,502
Generations!
244
00:10:04,570 --> 00:10:06,271
You had it as a kid,
and then,
245
00:10:06,339 --> 00:10:07,939
You're just
hooked on it forever.
246
00:10:08,007 --> 00:10:09,841
It was, you see a pregnant
woman pumping sauce on
247
00:10:09,909 --> 00:10:11,843
Her fries and you're like,
that baby's getting
248
00:10:11,911 --> 00:10:13,011
Addicted right now.
249
00:10:13,079 --> 00:10:14,913
He or she
doesn't even know it.
250
00:10:14,981 --> 00:10:17,482
Can you get hooked on
fry sauce in utero?
251
00:10:18,985 --> 00:10:21,786
What is making the
fry sauce so addictive?
252
00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:23,788
There's not too many things
in this world that I know
253
00:10:23,857 --> 00:10:27,125
That nobody else knows, so
I'm gonna keep that to myself.
254
00:10:27,193 --> 00:10:30,128
These secret recipes,
they're known only to greg,
255
00:10:30,196 --> 00:10:32,330
And his brother,
and their mother.
256
00:10:32,398 --> 00:10:35,600
And they've all agreed never
to be on the same flight.
257
00:10:35,669 --> 00:10:37,469
Just in case,
just in case.
258
00:10:49,082 --> 00:10:51,049
I'm not the only one who
thinks that port stanley
259
00:10:51,117 --> 00:10:52,917
Has a caribbean vibe.
260
00:10:52,985 --> 00:10:55,586
I talked to a spanish
teacher who's lived
261
00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:58,289
In cuba and costa rica.
262
00:10:58,357 --> 00:11:03,127
I went and I had a chat about
your beach con beatriz peraza.
263
00:11:03,196 --> 00:11:05,029
(cheering & applause)
264
00:11:05,032 --> 00:11:07,198
She said, you know,
she loves the lake.
265
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:09,367
In the summer,
it reminds her of home.
266
00:11:09,436 --> 00:11:12,136
You have the sun,
you have the waves,
267
00:11:12,205 --> 00:11:14,205
You got the
girls in bikinis.
268
00:11:14,274 --> 00:11:17,742
The sun, the surf,
the girls in bikinis.
269
00:11:17,811 --> 00:11:19,977
Although, with
her spanish accent,
270
00:11:20,046 --> 00:11:22,780
It sounded like she said,
"the gulls in bikinis".
271
00:11:22,783 --> 00:11:24,816
(laughing)
272
00:11:24,884 --> 00:11:28,386
I thought, gulls in bikinis?
273
00:11:28,455 --> 00:11:31,289
She's been teaching
spanish to people here.
274
00:11:31,291 --> 00:11:33,291
She says there are a lot
of canadians who are
275
00:11:33,359 --> 00:11:35,793
Really eager to
learn spanish now.
276
00:11:35,796 --> 00:11:39,263
A lot of my students tell me
when they go to a country,
277
00:11:39,332 --> 00:11:41,132
They would like to honour
the people there and
278
00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:42,567
Speak their language.
279
00:11:42,635 --> 00:11:43,802
I don't know if it's easy.
280
00:11:43,870 --> 00:11:47,472
Like, my name,
she said jon would juan.
281
00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:50,709
But because I'm a jonathan,
it would be jonatán.
282
00:11:53,080 --> 00:11:56,181
But I go by johnny,
which would be juanito.
283
00:11:58,451 --> 00:12:00,719
When I came over here,
I thought, you know,
284
00:12:00,787 --> 00:12:02,754
I would love to
honour this country and
285
00:12:02,756 --> 00:12:05,757
Learn the language.
I still have my sexy accent,
286
00:12:05,825 --> 00:12:08,126
There's nothing I can do
about that, johnny.
287
00:12:08,128 --> 00:12:11,596
She said, "I can't help
that I kept my sexy accent."
288
00:12:11,664 --> 00:12:14,099
I said, "neither can I,
missus, neither can I."
289
00:12:15,668 --> 00:12:18,903
She wants everybody
here to learn spanish.
290
00:12:18,905 --> 00:12:21,405
I don't know, in canada,
we've already got french.
291
00:12:21,474 --> 00:12:24,142
Do we need another reminder
that english is
292
00:12:24,210 --> 00:12:27,979
The least sexy
language of them all?
293
00:12:28,047 --> 00:12:29,781
You tell me, who's sexier,
294
00:12:29,783 --> 00:12:32,316
Johnny harris or senor jonatán?
295
00:12:32,385 --> 00:12:35,787
(laughing & applause)
296
00:12:35,855 --> 00:12:41,125
♪
297
00:12:41,194 --> 00:12:43,060
(laughing)
298
00:12:43,063 --> 00:12:44,095
♪
299
00:12:44,163 --> 00:12:46,531
I met one couple
who told me that
300
00:12:46,599 --> 00:12:49,834
Their favourite
sport is cricket.
301
00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:51,869
I did not expect
to hear that.
302
00:12:51,938 --> 00:12:54,372
Unlike some of my jokes
tonight where crickets
303
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:56,274
Is exactly what I
expected to hear.
304
00:12:57,611 --> 00:13:00,111
I had a chat with doris
and gabriel chordekar.
305
00:13:00,179 --> 00:13:02,847
(cheering & applause)
306
00:13:02,849 --> 00:13:05,750
These guys lived in
india, in israel,
307
00:13:05,818 --> 00:13:07,418
Then they moved to canada.
308
00:13:07,486 --> 00:13:11,022
What brought us out
here was coincidence.
309
00:13:11,024 --> 00:13:12,023
Yeah?
310
00:13:12,091 --> 00:13:13,024
We went to the
beach and we said,
311
00:13:13,092 --> 00:13:14,625
"oh, my god.
What is this?"
312
00:13:14,628 --> 00:13:16,627
- Lake erie is magical.
- Yeah, magical.
313
00:13:16,630 --> 00:13:18,563
If it likes you,
it's gonna pull you.
314
00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:21,032
And, everything
changed at the beach.
315
00:13:21,100 --> 00:13:22,867
We said,
"we are coming here."
316
00:13:22,936 --> 00:13:25,736
They soon noticed that nobody
was selling ethnic food
317
00:13:25,805 --> 00:13:29,640
In this area, so they opened
shebaz's shawarma & falafel.
318
00:13:29,709 --> 00:13:31,209
(cheering & applause)
319
00:13:31,277 --> 00:13:33,978
And people here took to it.
They loved it so much so
320
00:13:33,980 --> 00:13:35,713
That they opened
a second location.
321
00:13:35,715 --> 00:13:38,283
It's a lovely story, it would
"shwarm" your heart.
322
00:13:42,722 --> 00:13:46,224
Doris and gabriel are
diehard cricket fans.
323
00:13:46,292 --> 00:13:49,694
The only trouble is,
they cheer for rival teams.
324
00:13:49,762 --> 00:13:52,396
I like the mumbai indians
and she likes the...
325
00:13:52,399 --> 00:13:54,866
- Chennai super king.
- Chennai super king.
326
00:13:54,868 --> 00:13:59,170
My team won four times.
Her team only three times.
327
00:13:59,238 --> 00:14:00,672
It's okay,
this year is ours.
328
00:14:00,740 --> 00:14:02,073
It's okay, it's okay.
329
00:14:02,141 --> 00:14:04,809
Mumbai indians is an interesting
team name for me.
330
00:14:04,878 --> 00:14:08,379
It's like everybody
from mumbai be indian?
331
00:14:10,316 --> 00:14:12,083
It's like the
montreal canadiens.
332
00:14:12,151 --> 00:14:13,417
It's the same thing.
333
00:14:13,420 --> 00:14:16,888
Like, your team name
shouldn't be less specific.
334
00:14:16,890 --> 00:14:18,289
- Where's your team from?
- Montreal.
335
00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:19,457
- What are you?
- Canadiens.
336
00:14:19,459 --> 00:14:21,192
Yeah, I knew that
when you said montreal.
337
00:14:21,261 --> 00:14:22,627
(laughing)
338
00:14:22,695 --> 00:14:24,362
Within india,
we have the ipl,
339
00:14:24,430 --> 00:14:25,930
Indian premier league...
340
00:14:25,998 --> 00:14:27,365
That's where
the clash comes.
341
00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:29,767
But, internationally,
it has to be indian.
342
00:14:29,769 --> 00:14:30,835
- India.
- Of course.
343
00:14:30,904 --> 00:14:32,536
- There is no doubt about it.
- Yeah.
344
00:14:32,605 --> 00:14:35,673
But I said to them, I think
the stigma in north america
345
00:14:35,742 --> 00:14:37,642
Is that cricket
is confusing.
346
00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:39,477
Is it a difficult
game to understand?
347
00:14:39,479 --> 00:14:40,645
- No.
- No.
348
00:14:40,713 --> 00:14:44,048
They both said, "no, no!"
349
00:14:44,116 --> 00:14:45,917
And then they
explained it to me.
350
00:14:45,985 --> 00:14:48,419
Test matches,
there is one day,
351
00:14:48,421 --> 00:14:49,987
And there is twenty20.
352
00:14:49,990 --> 00:14:52,556
So, twenty20 is
only four hours.
353
00:14:52,625 --> 00:14:54,191
- Test matches, 8 hours.
- 8, 8...
354
00:14:54,194 --> 00:14:55,826
No, test
match is 5 days.
355
00:14:55,895 --> 00:14:58,463
5 days. And
one day is 8 hours.
356
00:14:58,531 --> 00:15:02,767
Each team bats for two times
and balls for two times.
357
00:15:02,835 --> 00:15:04,335
[speaking over each other]
that's a 5-day test--
358
00:15:04,337 --> 00:15:05,670
...And they start playing.
359
00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:08,806
Then we have the one day
where each team faces
360
00:15:08,875 --> 00:15:11,809
50 overs and makes a score
and the other has to defend.
361
00:15:11,878 --> 00:15:15,079
And the twenty20 is 20/20
overs for each team and
362
00:15:15,148 --> 00:15:17,081
That's like four
to five hours.
363
00:15:17,149 --> 00:15:18,849
It's an entertaining game.
364
00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:22,754
To me it just sounds like
little league softball.
365
00:15:22,822 --> 00:15:24,889
Everything went
over my head.
366
00:15:27,193 --> 00:15:29,927
So, how long could
a game possibly go?
367
00:15:29,996 --> 00:15:33,097
So, test match,
is played in five days.
368
00:15:33,166 --> 00:15:35,399
Five days to
reach a decision!
369
00:15:35,468 --> 00:15:37,568
Their decision to move to
port stanley happened
370
00:15:37,636 --> 00:15:39,304
In a fraction of that time.
371
00:15:40,806 --> 00:15:42,073
Throw it here.
372
00:15:42,141 --> 00:15:44,208
[johnny] we got out there,
gabriel was showing me
373
00:15:44,276 --> 00:15:46,010
How to bat, it's a
different stance from
374
00:15:46,012 --> 00:15:47,411
Anything I'm used to.
375
00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:49,580
Doris was pitching
or rather bowling.
376
00:15:49,648 --> 00:15:52,750
Their daughters were
doing some fielding.
377
00:15:52,818 --> 00:15:54,819
Gabriel is
great with the bat,
378
00:15:54,887 --> 00:15:56,187
He can really
knock them out.
379
00:15:56,189 --> 00:16:00,024
If he can't get doris or
the girls to bowl for him,
380
00:16:00,092 --> 00:16:04,061
He's got a
technique to self-serve.
381
00:16:04,130 --> 00:16:07,365
You put the
ball on your neck.
382
00:16:07,433 --> 00:16:10,034
On the right-- on this side.
383
00:16:10,102 --> 00:16:11,736
Like you're doing
dishes on the phone,
384
00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:12,937
You know what I mean?
385
00:16:12,939 --> 00:16:14,205
You sort of
hold it like that,
386
00:16:14,207 --> 00:16:17,108
And then you drop it
and quickly swing at it.
387
00:16:19,845 --> 00:16:21,912
Okay.
388
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:23,648
It's a little
bit like, guys,
389
00:16:23,716 --> 00:16:25,850
If you drop your
phone over the toilet,
390
00:16:25,918 --> 00:16:27,518
You're like, "oh, god, no!"
391
00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:29,620
(laughing)
392
00:16:29,622 --> 00:16:30,688
- Oh!
- Oh!
393
00:16:30,690 --> 00:16:32,089
- Contact, at least.
- Super.
394
00:16:32,092 --> 00:16:33,558
At least.
395
00:16:33,626 --> 00:16:36,427
For them, moving to port stanley
might have been a gamble,
396
00:16:36,495 --> 00:16:37,628
But they moved anyway.
397
00:16:37,696 --> 00:16:42,133
I think life, for them,
is like cricket to me.
398
00:16:42,201 --> 00:16:44,369
Sometimes you see
people moving
399
00:16:44,437 --> 00:16:45,936
Even though it
doesn't make sense.
400
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:48,572
(laughing)
401
00:16:48,575 --> 00:16:53,077
(applause &
cheering)
402
00:16:53,145 --> 00:16:54,746
Oh! Nice one!
403
00:16:59,185 --> 00:17:02,086
[johnny] is canada a great
place to catch waves?
404
00:17:02,155 --> 00:17:04,789
Yes, people are
friendly and polite.
405
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:07,324
But surfing on
the great lakes?
406
00:17:07,327 --> 00:17:08,693
Well, it happens.
407
00:17:08,761 --> 00:17:11,328
I went and got tipsy
with carol thompson.
408
00:17:11,397 --> 00:17:13,564
(cheering & applause)
409
00:17:13,632 --> 00:17:15,466
Surfing has
always been a passion,
410
00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:16,934
Even when I was
just a little kid.
411
00:17:17,002 --> 00:17:18,969
I was watching surfing on
tv and I was just
412
00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:20,405
Really enthralled with it.
413
00:17:20,473 --> 00:17:23,141
She's a real estate agent
who goes from the office
414
00:17:23,209 --> 00:17:27,011
To the river to the beach.
Location, location, location.
415
00:17:27,079 --> 00:17:28,412
(laughing)
416
00:17:28,481 --> 00:17:30,681
I'll be sitting in my
office and my paddle boards,
417
00:17:30,749 --> 00:17:32,683
You know, surf boards,
they're all there.
418
00:17:32,751 --> 00:17:35,420
When I want to have a break,
I just put a sign on the window
419
00:17:35,488 --> 00:17:38,289
Saying, "gone surfing,
I'll be back whenever."
420
00:17:38,357 --> 00:17:40,758
Gotta be a big temptation
when you're working, like,
421
00:17:40,827 --> 00:17:43,127
I wonder if she's ever bailed
on a client, you know...
422
00:17:43,195 --> 00:17:44,428
(laughing)
423
00:17:44,431 --> 00:17:46,564
"very sorry, I have an
important board meeting."
424
00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:51,202
In the off-season,
I still like to make sure
425
00:17:51,204 --> 00:17:55,039
That I, I keep in shape.
So, I go out paddle boarding
426
00:17:55,107 --> 00:17:57,308
And it just keeps me
going all year.
427
00:17:57,376 --> 00:17:59,276
She's got a gang of
gals that she goes
428
00:17:59,345 --> 00:18:00,411
Paddle boarding with.
429
00:18:00,413 --> 00:18:02,446
Woo!
430
00:18:02,515 --> 00:18:05,983
We got out there and getting
up on a paddle board
431
00:18:06,051 --> 00:18:09,086
Is shaky enough. I can't
imagine actual surfing.
432
00:18:09,155 --> 00:18:10,888
She said, "you gotta
wait for a wave,
433
00:18:10,956 --> 00:18:13,524
Then you got a split second,
and then you gotta pop up."
434
00:18:13,593 --> 00:18:16,494
I could not do a pop up.
435
00:18:16,562 --> 00:18:19,931
I would call it a
got up, gradually.
436
00:18:19,999 --> 00:18:22,533
And... He does it!
437
00:18:22,602 --> 00:18:24,235
Carole said for
paddle boarding,
438
00:18:24,237 --> 00:18:26,437
You really have to
have a solid core.
439
00:18:26,505 --> 00:18:28,639
I've always liked to
think of my core
440
00:18:28,707 --> 00:18:30,608
As like the earth's core...
441
00:18:30,676 --> 00:18:32,944
Soft, but still super hot.
442
00:18:35,415 --> 00:18:36,847
Oh, my god, the wind!
443
00:18:36,916 --> 00:18:39,450
The wind was... A factor.
444
00:18:40,954 --> 00:18:42,853
I was paddling away and
I was just looking down
445
00:18:42,922 --> 00:18:45,623
Trying not to fall over, and I
looked up 5 minutes later
446
00:18:45,691 --> 00:18:47,858
And I was 50 feet
behind where I started.
447
00:18:47,927 --> 00:18:49,627
(laughing)
448
00:18:49,695 --> 00:18:50,728
The first thing
I thought was,
449
00:18:50,796 --> 00:18:52,963
Oh, man, I feel
out of shape.
450
00:18:52,966 --> 00:18:54,398
The second thing
I thought was,
451
00:18:54,466 --> 00:18:56,601
What do you mean, feel?
You are out of shape.
452
00:18:58,771 --> 00:19:01,372
♪
453
00:19:01,440 --> 00:19:02,907
But it was just
nice to get out there,
454
00:19:02,909 --> 00:19:05,476
Nice to get moving out
there on kettle creek.
455
00:19:05,544 --> 00:19:07,445
You see the old
train bridge,
456
00:19:07,513 --> 00:19:10,381
And you see both sides
of the town, you know.
457
00:19:10,449 --> 00:19:12,883
The side with the
inn, and the shops,
458
00:19:12,886 --> 00:19:14,252
And the businesses.
459
00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:18,122
And the side with the,
the beach parties and...
460
00:19:18,190 --> 00:19:20,257
Oh, my god...
461
00:19:20,260 --> 00:19:21,759
You're business
in the front,
462
00:19:21,827 --> 00:19:24,295
Party in the back.
You're a mullet!
463
00:19:26,132 --> 00:19:29,267
(cheering & applause)
464
00:19:29,335 --> 00:19:31,802
♪
465
00:19:31,804 --> 00:19:33,771
Port stanley,
you've gone through
466
00:19:33,839 --> 00:19:36,474
Some boom times and
experienced loss.
467
00:19:36,542 --> 00:19:38,275
The future is as unknowable
468
00:19:38,278 --> 00:19:40,311
As the recipe for
mackies' sauce.
469
00:19:40,379 --> 00:19:41,679
[audience] (laughing)
470
00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:44,448
On the beach, there's
surfing, swimming, tanning.
471
00:19:44,516 --> 00:19:45,649
Do what you
please here in port,
472
00:19:45,718 --> 00:19:47,118
Just don't come
home with salmon.
473
00:19:48,821 --> 00:19:51,789
Catch a big yellow perch
with a small silver minnow,
474
00:19:51,857 --> 00:19:54,625
Or catch a ride to the
bar in a big, white limo.
475
00:19:54,627 --> 00:19:57,027
It's a beautiful town,
just look around.
476
00:19:57,030 --> 00:19:58,996
That's why more and
more people pick it.
477
00:19:59,064 --> 00:20:02,266
There's water and sand,
it's not hard to understand...
478
00:20:02,334 --> 00:20:04,101
I wish I could say
the same for cricket.
479
00:20:04,169 --> 00:20:05,869
(laughing)
480
00:20:05,872 --> 00:20:07,705
People paddle kettle creek,
481
00:20:07,773 --> 00:20:09,940
Which the bridge would
normally straddle.
482
00:20:10,009 --> 00:20:12,209
For now,
it's stuck up on the creek,
483
00:20:12,278 --> 00:20:14,111
But you'll
always have a paddle.
484
00:20:14,179 --> 00:20:15,646
Thanks for coming out,
port stanley!
485
00:20:15,648 --> 00:20:16,847
You've been great!
486
00:20:16,849 --> 00:20:19,717
(cheering & applause)
487
00:20:19,785 --> 00:20:21,185
- I was crying laughing.
- My cheeks...
488
00:20:21,254 --> 00:20:24,255
I think he did a beautiful
job of capturing our village.
489
00:20:24,323 --> 00:20:26,123
♪
490
00:20:26,191 --> 00:20:29,460
Johnny's set tonight was like a
perfect set of waves, yeah.
491
00:20:29,528 --> 00:20:34,365
♪
492
00:20:34,433 --> 00:20:36,834
- Johnny at cricket?
- He was amazing!
493
00:20:36,902 --> 00:20:38,902
Ooh!
494
00:20:38,971 --> 00:20:41,038
- And that's how you do it!
- Oh, maybe not.
495
00:20:41,040 --> 00:20:43,507
It's the best
$3700 I ever spent.
496
00:20:43,575 --> 00:20:45,175
3700?
497
00:20:45,178 --> 00:20:46,244
♪
498
00:20:46,312 --> 00:20:47,444
I need a limo driver.
499
00:20:47,513 --> 00:20:49,413
Johnny, if comedy
doesn't work out for ya,
500
00:20:49,482 --> 00:20:50,681
Come and see me.
501
00:20:50,749 --> 00:20:52,816
You can be the next limo
driver in port stanley.
502
00:20:52,819 --> 00:20:57,988
♪
503
00:20:58,057 --> 00:21:00,691
There was no fish tales.
Johnny was this good!
504
00:21:00,759 --> 00:21:04,462
♪