1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 WWW.MY-SUBS.CO 1 00:00:31,760 --> 00:00:35,869 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - -- www.MY-SUBS.com -- 2 00:00:39,430 --> 00:00:42,960 I'm gonna rip out your spleen and feed it to your husband! 3 00:00:42,970 --> 00:00:44,540 Uh-oh. Wouldn't want that. 4 00:00:44,560 --> 00:00:46,840 Yikes, Morty. We'd better run before it figures out 5 00:00:46,850 --> 00:00:48,132 what a husband is. 6 00:00:48,150 --> 00:00:50,740 This carnival of nightmares used to be scary, right? 7 00:00:50,760 --> 00:00:53,160 - Ah. We've seen too much. - It sucks, you know, 8 00:00:53,170 --> 00:00:55,530 'cause it's fun to break off a scare now and then. 9 00:00:55,550 --> 00:00:59,101 Did I hear you fellows wishing for some good old-fashioned scares? 10 00:00:59,120 --> 00:01:01,060 I mean, I more wish you wouldn't eavesdrop. 11 00:01:01,080 --> 00:01:02,140 Yeah. Who are you? 12 00:01:02,160 --> 00:01:03,860 Does the suit mean you work here, 13 00:01:03,880 --> 00:01:05,524 or that you super don't work here? 14 00:01:05,530 --> 00:01:08,220 Like yourselves, I'm a connoisseur of fear. 15 00:01:08,240 --> 00:01:09,780 I'm also originally from Earth. 16 00:01:09,800 --> 00:01:11,670 And did you know Earth is the home 17 00:01:11,690 --> 00:01:14,180 of the single scariest place in the galaxy? 18 00:01:14,200 --> 00:01:15,534 I can show you if you like. 19 00:01:15,540 --> 00:01:18,037 We were headed that way anyway. 20 00:01:18,740 --> 00:01:20,150 Take a left. Almost there. 21 00:01:20,170 --> 00:01:21,340 We know where Earth is. 22 00:01:21,360 --> 00:01:23,720 For guys like you, you know, who've seen it all, 23 00:01:23,740 --> 00:01:26,754 there's only a few real fears left to conquer. 24 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:30,674 And one of them is right down here. 25 00:01:33,780 --> 00:01:36,080 - Okay. What the hell? - Yeah. This is punching down. 26 00:01:36,100 --> 00:01:38,459 Denny's is a nice chain that gives people starchy food 27 00:01:38,460 --> 00:01:39,939 - when they're up late. - It's a hack joke, buddy. 28 00:01:39,940 --> 00:01:42,900 No. This is the place. Good luck to both of you. 29 00:01:42,920 --> 00:01:44,188 I'm gonna get myself a slam. 30 00:01:44,900 --> 00:01:46,880 He just wanted a ride, right? 31 00:01:46,900 --> 00:01:48,300 He certainly took us for one. 32 00:01:49,060 --> 00:01:50,900 Well, as long as we're here. 33 00:01:51,600 --> 00:01:53,880 Okay. Lumberjack slam, grand slamwich, 34 00:01:53,900 --> 00:01:55,960 pancake puppies, slamburger, two milkshakes... 35 00:01:55,980 --> 00:01:57,480 and an order of cheddar tots. 36 00:01:57,500 --> 00:01:58,759 Let me know when you want your cheque, 37 00:01:58,760 --> 00:02:00,819 and if you're here for the Hole, it's in the men's bathroom. 38 00:02:00,820 --> 00:02:02,180 - The what now? - Hole? 39 00:02:02,200 --> 00:02:04,541 The Fear Hole. Men's bathroom. 40 00:02:14,840 --> 00:02:16,400 Well, it's definitely a hole. 41 00:02:16,420 --> 00:02:17,519 They weren't lying about that. 42 00:02:17,520 --> 00:02:19,848 Is that hair? Seaweed? 43 00:02:19,860 --> 00:02:22,440 Boy, it's really circling the whole rim, huh? 44 00:02:22,450 --> 00:02:24,900 Guess you got to jump in without touching the sides? 45 00:02:24,920 --> 00:02:26,760 You think there's spikes on the bottom? 46 00:02:26,780 --> 00:02:28,879 I don't think they want you to go in there and just die. 47 00:02:28,880 --> 00:02:30,099 What kind of business would that be? 48 00:02:30,100 --> 00:02:31,409 Well, they're not drowning in money. 49 00:02:31,410 --> 00:02:33,380 They still have a built-in TV/VCR. 50 00:02:34,020 --> 00:02:35,459 - _ - Hey. It's that carnival guy. 51 00:02:35,460 --> 00:02:36,940 Oh, so he gets a kickback. 52 00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:38,360 Hi. Welcome to the Hole. 53 00:02:38,380 --> 00:02:40,220 Here's how it works. You jump in. 54 00:02:40,240 --> 00:02:42,200 The Hole manifests your greatest fear. 55 00:02:42,220 --> 00:02:45,300 You conquer that fear, and come out, well, fearless. 56 00:02:45,320 --> 00:02:47,200 And you get your picture on the wall. 57 00:02:47,220 --> 00:02:48,459 What does the Hole get out of it? 58 00:02:48,460 --> 00:02:51,660 Well, you know those fish that nibble dead skin off your feet? 59 00:02:51,680 --> 00:02:53,360 Yeah. The Hole's kind of like that. 60 00:02:53,370 --> 00:02:54,380 It eats fear. 61 00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:55,580 You win. It wins. 62 00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:57,330 Have fun and enjoy the Hole. 63 00:02:58,440 --> 00:03:00,260 Hey, Gaddafi, cool your jets 64 00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:01,620 with a taste of Mountain Dew. 65 00:03:01,640 --> 00:03:03,690 This has been here since VHS tapes 66 00:03:03,710 --> 00:03:05,280 and there's only three photos? 67 00:03:05,300 --> 00:03:06,660 Yeah. My tots are getting cold. 68 00:03:06,680 --> 00:03:08,260 So, you don't want to do it? 69 00:03:08,280 --> 00:03:09,680 - Do you? - I mean... 70 00:03:09,700 --> 00:03:11,900 It says it takes away your greatest fear. 71 00:03:11,920 --> 00:03:13,200 My greatest fear, Morty, 72 00:03:13,220 --> 00:03:15,338 is trusting a gross hole to conquer my fear, 73 00:03:15,339 --> 00:03:17,489 and I conquer that fear by walking away. 74 00:03:17,490 --> 00:03:18,960 Okay, fine. 75 00:03:21,140 --> 00:03:22,280 You little turd! 76 00:03:24,630 --> 00:03:27,750 - Oh, God! - Oh, God! 77 00:03:30,320 --> 00:03:33,470 Hold still while I stuff you with maggots. 78 00:03:33,480 --> 00:03:36,180 Rick! 79 00:03:36,820 --> 00:03:40,060 Okay. The Hole thinks I'm scared of not having a gun? 80 00:03:41,990 --> 00:03:43,790 Fear conquered! 81 00:03:45,120 --> 00:03:48,228 Check out them gains. Morty? Where are you, Morty? 82 00:03:48,230 --> 00:03:49,600 Let's go. 83 00:03:49,610 --> 00:03:51,600 - Oh, jeez. Oh, God. Oh, jeez. - Oh, man. 84 00:03:51,610 --> 00:03:52,650 We both shit our pants. 85 00:03:52,660 --> 00:03:54,358 - Christ, Rick. My button. - What a fucking ride. 86 00:03:54,359 --> 00:03:57,100 - Maggots! In my button. - Fuck, yeah. 87 00:03:57,110 --> 00:04:00,491 - On the wall, motherfuckers! - It's not worth it. Not worth it! 88 00:04:03,300 --> 00:04:05,020 Oh, my God. You both reek. 89 00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:06,980 - What is that? - Morty and I shit our pants. 90 00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:09,300 You're looking at the two newest members of the Hole club. 91 00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:11,330 Uh, okay, sluts. 92 00:04:11,340 --> 00:04:13,560 What the hell? 93 00:04:13,580 --> 00:04:16,630 Bomb almost killed her. 94 00:04:16,650 --> 00:04:19,460 Take care of our wife. 95 00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:22,780 Rick? No. Oh, my God. 96 00:04:22,800 --> 00:04:24,370 No. No! 97 00:04:24,390 --> 00:04:27,340 - Mom? - Where am I? Who are you people? 98 00:04:27,360 --> 00:04:29,799 You're my mom, but you're young? 99 00:04:29,800 --> 00:04:32,397 - Rick, what's happening? - Wait. 100 00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:33,816 Rick? 101 00:04:33,830 --> 00:04:36,420 What the fuck, Grandpa? Say something. 102 00:04:36,440 --> 00:04:37,859 Okay. We're clearly still in the Hole. 103 00:04:37,860 --> 00:04:38,979 That's exactly what I was thinking. 104 00:04:38,980 --> 00:04:40,099 We never left the Hole and... 105 00:04:40,100 --> 00:04:42,059 And part of the Hole is thinking you left the Hole and then... 106 00:04:42,060 --> 00:04:43,299 And then it can really dig into you. 107 00:04:43,300 --> 00:04:45,979 Because you can't really be scared of anything if you know you're... 108 00:04:45,980 --> 00:04:47,830 Still in the Hole. 109 00:04:47,850 --> 00:04:49,179 What the fuck are you two talking about? 110 00:04:49,180 --> 00:04:51,330 Why is dead Grandma alive in our living room? 111 00:04:51,350 --> 00:04:52,835 Rick, why are you old? 112 00:04:52,850 --> 00:04:53,980 All great questions. 113 00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:56,469 You guys get reacquainted while we grab some equipment. 114 00:04:56,470 --> 00:04:59,580 Wait. Are we sure this isn't, like, a double mislead? 115 00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:01,900 A double mislead like we went into a generic fear hole 116 00:05:01,920 --> 00:05:03,970 and then coincidentally came home to that? 117 00:05:03,990 --> 00:05:05,920 That's... That's my wife. 118 00:05:05,940 --> 00:05:07,558 From the day I lost her. 119 00:05:07,570 --> 00:05:09,420 Well, what's it got to do with me? 120 00:05:10,670 --> 00:05:11,687 - Rick. - Right. 121 00:05:11,700 --> 00:05:13,300 I think I figured it out, Morty. 122 00:05:13,320 --> 00:05:15,200 Your greatest fear is me getting Diane back 123 00:05:15,220 --> 00:05:17,190 - and being happy again. - What? Why? 124 00:05:17,210 --> 00:05:18,500 Because then I won't need you. 125 00:05:18,520 --> 00:05:20,099 Look how scared you're getting just talking about it. 126 00:05:20,100 --> 00:05:21,947 I'm not scared. I'm insulted. 127 00:05:21,950 --> 00:05:24,030 What kind of backhanded-ass theory is that? 128 00:05:24,050 --> 00:05:25,909 My greatest fear is you hooking up? 129 00:05:25,910 --> 00:05:28,760 You're right. We can't know for sure until I get more data. 130 00:05:28,780 --> 00:05:31,957 All right, family. Who wants to catch up over ice cream? 131 00:05:31,960 --> 00:05:34,680 I knew he was working on teleportation. 132 00:05:34,700 --> 00:05:36,879 But wouldn't this be time travel? 133 00:05:36,890 --> 00:05:39,010 Oh, Dad never touches time travel. 134 00:05:39,030 --> 00:05:40,040 He calls it the Long... 135 00:05:40,060 --> 00:05:42,640 The Long Island Iced Tea of science fiction. Yes. 136 00:05:42,650 --> 00:05:44,560 But then, what... what is this? 137 00:05:44,580 --> 00:05:45,759 Don't worry about it. It's not real. 138 00:05:45,760 --> 00:05:48,260 Okay. I figure it's better to do this in front of you. 139 00:05:48,280 --> 00:05:49,939 I didn't want to walk in De-aged. 140 00:05:49,940 --> 00:05:51,720 What do you think, D? 45? Younger? 141 00:05:51,740 --> 00:05:53,540 I don't care about your age, Rick. 142 00:05:53,560 --> 00:05:54,709 I don't even want to call you that. 143 00:05:54,710 --> 00:05:56,120 That's my husband's name. 144 00:05:56,140 --> 00:05:58,940 - He just died. - I know. 145 00:05:58,960 --> 00:06:00,240 So, 27? 146 00:06:00,260 --> 00:06:02,010 Dad! You're traumatizing her. 147 00:06:02,030 --> 00:06:03,530 What? It's my face, too. 148 00:06:03,550 --> 00:06:04,799 And now Diane gets to understand 149 00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:06,700 that I'm still sexy and a genius. 150 00:06:06,720 --> 00:06:07,980 What a kindness. 151 00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:11,121 You were right, Rick. I'm really terrified right now. 152 00:06:11,130 --> 00:06:12,160 Terrified of what? 153 00:06:12,180 --> 00:06:14,040 If you don't mind, I'd like to get to know 154 00:06:14,060 --> 00:06:15,918 the adult version of my... 155 00:06:15,920 --> 00:06:17,460 Oh, my God. 156 00:06:17,480 --> 00:06:19,250 Where's my real daughter? 157 00:06:19,270 --> 00:06:20,400 Sweetie, it's all right. 158 00:06:20,420 --> 00:06:21,960 This may as well be our real daughter 159 00:06:21,980 --> 00:06:23,520 because she's just as real as you. 160 00:06:23,540 --> 00:06:24,640 - What? - Put it this way. 161 00:06:24,660 --> 00:06:26,280 You're all basically NPCs. 162 00:06:26,300 --> 00:06:27,400 Only Morty and I are real, 163 00:06:27,420 --> 00:06:28,931 so your side quests don't matter. 164 00:06:28,950 --> 00:06:31,730 - The main quest is us. - You're disgusting. 165 00:06:31,740 --> 00:06:34,720 You're talking about our baby girl like she's theoretical? 166 00:06:34,740 --> 00:06:35,950 Welcome to the family. 167 00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:37,200 No. You don't get it, honey. 168 00:06:37,220 --> 00:06:38,260 Even if this was real, 169 00:06:38,280 --> 00:06:39,789 she'd be only a version of your daughter 170 00:06:39,790 --> 00:06:41,159 who could also be a clone of your daughter. 171 00:06:41,160 --> 00:06:43,280 Stop wearing my husband's face! 172 00:06:43,300 --> 00:06:44,488 You're nothing like him. 173 00:06:44,500 --> 00:06:45,781 Because I lost you! 174 00:06:45,800 --> 00:06:48,070 Maybe you didn't deserve me. 175 00:06:53,260 --> 00:06:54,850 You want to hear a new theory? 176 00:06:54,870 --> 00:06:56,800 Maybe your greatest fear 177 00:06:56,820 --> 00:06:59,520 is getting a second chance with her and blowing it. 178 00:06:59,540 --> 00:07:01,640 You don't think that fear's been pretty well faced? 179 00:07:01,660 --> 00:07:03,480 Then you haven't conquered it. 180 00:07:03,500 --> 00:07:05,799 Or accepted it. Or something. 181 00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:07,500 - "Or something?" - I'm not a fear-ologist. 182 00:07:07,520 --> 00:07:09,320 Morty, all Rom-coms have an arc. 183 00:07:09,330 --> 00:07:11,859 Even "You've Got Mail" begins with Tom Hanks killing that cop. 184 00:07:11,860 --> 00:07:12,874 - Really? - I don't know. 185 00:07:12,875 --> 00:07:14,489 I'm not going to fucking watch "You've Got Mail." 186 00:07:14,490 --> 00:07:16,000 I'm doing this for you, Morty. 187 00:07:16,020 --> 00:07:17,120 The sooner I get her back, 188 00:07:17,140 --> 00:07:20,700 the sooner you can conquer your fear of being a useless, lonely turd. 189 00:07:20,720 --> 00:07:22,734 You don't think that's been faced? 190 00:07:25,112 --> 00:07:27,364 _ 191 00:07:27,380 --> 00:07:30,280 ♪ Hello, Diane, here's the song I rehearsed ♪ 192 00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:32,850 ♪ You had a bad day and Rick made it worse ♪ 193 00:07:32,870 --> 00:07:35,360 ♪ He felt bad, so he created me ♪ 194 00:07:35,380 --> 00:07:38,417 ♪ I deliver you waffles and an apology ♪ 195 00:07:38,420 --> 00:07:40,720 Why do I have memories of being a human child? 196 00:07:40,740 --> 00:07:42,380 - Why would I need... - Shit, shit, shit. 197 00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:44,240 God damn it. There was a whole second verse 198 00:07:44,250 --> 00:07:45,949 about inviting you to the zoo with the family. 199 00:07:45,950 --> 00:07:48,770 I've seen that robot's arms. 200 00:07:48,790 --> 00:07:50,580 Yeah. I used them on a law enforcement drone 201 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:51,888 that the feds had me build. 202 00:07:51,900 --> 00:07:55,720 It's how we, uh... How I met my wife. 203 00:07:55,740 --> 00:07:58,228 The zoo sounds nice. 204 00:07:58,230 --> 00:08:00,060 And this one time, we raised a civilization 205 00:08:00,070 --> 00:08:01,300 living on a zit on my face, 206 00:08:01,320 --> 00:08:03,200 and Grandpa helped me rule over it as queen. 207 00:08:03,220 --> 00:08:05,720 It sounds like you guys are a real family now. 208 00:08:05,740 --> 00:08:07,660 I wish you could've been part of it, Mom. 209 00:08:07,680 --> 00:08:09,364 Oh. 210 00:08:09,380 --> 00:08:10,390 Oh, honey. 211 00:08:10,400 --> 00:08:12,700 Rick, is there a deadline on this theory you're chasing? 212 00:08:12,720 --> 00:08:16,200 Uh, yeah, sure. Uh, that's a good idea, Morty. 213 00:08:16,220 --> 00:08:17,539 Do that. 214 00:08:19,180 --> 00:08:21,710 I always wished I knew what they were saying. 215 00:08:21,730 --> 00:08:23,980 Your Master's thesis. Non-human intelligence. 216 00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:25,720 When did you read that? 217 00:08:25,740 --> 00:08:26,969 After you were gone. 218 00:08:26,970 --> 00:08:28,700 It helped me develop this. 219 00:08:30,180 --> 00:08:31,340 Fuck you! Fuck you, Greg. 220 00:08:31,350 --> 00:08:33,138 - Fuck you, Lisa. Yum, bread. - No, 221 00:08:33,150 --> 00:08:34,559 - fuck you. - Fuck you. There's bread. 222 00:08:34,560 --> 00:08:35,899 I guess that's what I expected. 223 00:08:35,910 --> 00:08:37,300 Anticlimactic, isn't it? 224 00:08:37,320 --> 00:08:39,790 Yep. They kind of suck. 225 00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:44,020 Hey. Want to grab a drink? 226 00:08:44,040 --> 00:08:46,401 - Hey-hey! - Woo! Yeah. 227 00:08:46,410 --> 00:08:47,903 All right. Woo! 228 00:08:49,620 --> 00:08:52,350 _ 229 00:08:58,400 --> 00:09:01,080 So, when did you stop being a lightweight? 230 00:09:01,100 --> 00:09:03,480 Kept looking for my wife at the bottom of a bottle. 231 00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:05,000 You're pathetic. 232 00:09:05,020 --> 00:09:07,400 Hey. To being pathetic. 233 00:09:12,500 --> 00:09:14,130 Clear! 234 00:09:15,560 --> 00:09:17,550 _ 235 00:09:17,570 --> 00:09:18,850 _ 236 00:09:18,870 --> 00:09:20,750 _ 237 00:09:23,540 --> 00:09:24,919 My turn. My turn. 238 00:09:29,460 --> 00:09:30,890 I'll tell you what, old man. 239 00:09:30,900 --> 00:09:34,340 Seems like losing me made you cooler. 240 00:09:34,360 --> 00:09:35,870 I should die more often. 241 00:09:36,920 --> 00:09:38,540 You did. 242 00:09:38,560 --> 00:09:41,420 You died everywhere forever. 243 00:09:41,440 --> 00:09:43,210 You're the only thing I can't replace. 244 00:09:43,220 --> 00:09:45,560 Okay, okay, Mr. Weepy. 245 00:09:45,580 --> 00:09:47,680 I'm not even real, remember? 246 00:09:47,700 --> 00:09:50,260 Nothing's real. That's your jam, right? 247 00:09:50,280 --> 00:09:53,870 My grandson, our grandson, thinks this is happening 248 00:09:53,880 --> 00:09:55,860 because my greatest fear is letting you go. 249 00:09:55,880 --> 00:09:56,890 Then don't. 250 00:09:56,900 --> 00:09:58,380 - I don't want to. - Then kiss me. 251 00:09:58,400 --> 00:10:00,260 I'm old, and we have puke mouth. 252 00:10:00,270 --> 00:10:02,440 Well, I'm not here, and it's not real puke. 253 00:10:10,940 --> 00:10:13,480 - Okay, Rick... Whoa! Dude. - Fuck you, Morty. 254 00:10:13,490 --> 00:10:14,999 - It's a blazer. - That's not what I meant. 255 00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:16,190 You look sick. 256 00:10:16,210 --> 00:10:17,539 The Hole is feeding on you. 257 00:10:17,540 --> 00:10:19,327 I thought it's supposed to eat my fear. 258 00:10:19,340 --> 00:10:20,839 Can we get some fucking rules up in this hole? 259 00:10:20,840 --> 00:10:22,780 I don't know the rules. Maybe you're dying 260 00:10:22,800 --> 00:10:24,290 because you've been in here too long. 261 00:10:24,310 --> 00:10:25,490 Interesting theory. 262 00:10:25,510 --> 00:10:27,090 I wonder why you're so rosy-cheeked. 263 00:10:27,110 --> 00:10:28,699 - What are you saying? - Maybe the real you 264 00:10:28,700 --> 00:10:30,260 is off somewhere running from spiders. 265 00:10:30,280 --> 00:10:31,720 Oh. So, now I'm not real? 266 00:10:31,730 --> 00:10:33,649 Yeah. Maybe my greatest fear is having to tell you 267 00:10:33,650 --> 00:10:34,660 to fuck the fuck off. 268 00:10:34,680 --> 00:10:36,400 - Go ahead and face it. - Fuck the fuck off! 269 00:10:36,420 --> 00:10:38,470 Hey. Ready to Showbiz Pizza? 270 00:10:38,490 --> 00:10:40,300 Let me see that bear play banjo. 271 00:10:40,320 --> 00:10:41,320 Here's one for you. 272 00:10:41,330 --> 00:10:43,340 I'm afraid of watching you die. 273 00:10:43,360 --> 00:10:45,812 I like that theory, Morty. So, stop watching. 274 00:10:49,610 --> 00:10:51,820 Okay, this is it. You nailed it. 275 00:10:51,840 --> 00:10:53,180 My worst nightmare. 276 00:10:53,200 --> 00:10:54,940 I'd like to leave the Hole now. 277 00:10:55,810 --> 00:10:58,300 Hey. Hey, Hole, I'm talking to you. 278 00:10:58,320 --> 00:10:59,400 Are you listening? 279 00:11:08,390 --> 00:11:10,700 So, what are you? Like, the Hole? 280 00:11:10,720 --> 00:11:11,880 The Hole's promoter? 281 00:11:11,900 --> 00:11:14,000 - The Hole's intern? - Is there a hole here? 282 00:11:14,020 --> 00:11:16,800 Right. I'm supposed to go in there and be shocked 283 00:11:16,820 --> 00:11:19,240 that there's no hole, or that there is a hole. 284 00:11:19,260 --> 00:11:20,510 What difference would it make? 285 00:11:20,530 --> 00:11:22,599 Hmm. You are hard to scare. 286 00:11:22,600 --> 00:11:23,960 And Rick isn't, right? 287 00:11:23,980 --> 00:11:26,300 The Hole's gonna, like, suck on him forever 288 00:11:26,320 --> 00:11:29,020 because his big secret is that he's got the most fear? 289 00:11:29,040 --> 00:11:31,720 Well, we can certainly say you're not afraid to be reductive. 290 00:11:31,740 --> 00:11:33,679 I doubt your grandpa has more fear 291 00:11:33,680 --> 00:11:35,230 than the average asshole in a Denny's. 292 00:11:35,240 --> 00:11:36,240 - Hey! - Sorry. 293 00:11:36,260 --> 00:11:38,330 If anything, he seems pretty brave. 294 00:11:38,340 --> 00:11:39,879 He's certainly not afraid to die. 295 00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:43,060 Maybe that makes his fear extra-delicious. 296 00:11:45,390 --> 00:11:47,700 So, what, he's scared of love? 297 00:11:47,720 --> 00:11:49,500 Everyone's scared of love, dipshit. 298 00:11:49,510 --> 00:11:50,770 You learn that in your 20s. 299 00:11:50,790 --> 00:11:53,300 It takes a very rare, very powerful being 300 00:11:53,310 --> 00:11:55,750 to be terrified of happiness. 301 00:11:55,770 --> 00:11:56,970 - Dumb. - You're dumb. 302 00:11:56,980 --> 00:11:58,529 That's why you're not scared to be happy. 303 00:11:58,530 --> 00:12:00,090 The smarter you are, the more you know. 304 00:12:00,100 --> 00:12:02,940 Happiness is a trap. It can't last forever. 305 00:12:02,960 --> 00:12:04,499 Let's say you meet the love of your life. 306 00:12:04,500 --> 00:12:06,180 Well, it's still gonna end. 307 00:12:06,200 --> 00:12:09,290 It's inevitable, whether by the slow pull of a disease, 308 00:12:09,300 --> 00:12:11,560 or the shock of loose footing on a hiking trail. 309 00:12:11,580 --> 00:12:13,920 Whether it be the corrosion of two personalities 310 00:12:13,940 --> 00:12:16,100 that reshape each other until they're incompatible, 311 00:12:16,120 --> 00:12:17,740 or maybe the old stranger in a bar 312 00:12:17,750 --> 00:12:19,400 who says the things that need to be said, 313 00:12:19,420 --> 00:12:21,869 to that person, that night. 314 00:12:21,870 --> 00:12:25,400 The point is, happiness always ends. 315 00:12:25,420 --> 00:12:26,829 Best-case scenario. Think about this. 316 00:12:26,830 --> 00:12:31,250 Best case is that you die at the same time. 317 00:12:31,270 --> 00:12:32,294 Yikes. 318 00:12:32,300 --> 00:12:33,880 Can't the Hole just let me go, then? 319 00:12:33,900 --> 00:12:35,580 - Sounds like I don't matter. - You don't. 320 00:12:35,600 --> 00:12:37,179 But if you go, you'll take him away. 321 00:12:37,180 --> 00:12:40,218 Don't worry. Rick will die before accepting happiness. 322 00:12:40,220 --> 00:12:42,310 After that, we'll chase you with some clowns 323 00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:43,760 or some dumb shit like that. 324 00:12:43,780 --> 00:12:45,420 But Grandpa... 325 00:12:45,440 --> 00:12:47,976 Yummy, yummy. Grandpa's gonna die. 326 00:12:47,990 --> 00:12:50,500 Just like Diane. 327 00:12:56,960 --> 00:12:59,660 Sir, you've been in this booth for a really long time. 328 00:12:59,680 --> 00:13:01,700 - One coffee isn't gonna cut it. - That's fair. 329 00:13:01,720 --> 00:13:03,770 - Want to split some pancake puppies? - No! 330 00:13:05,830 --> 00:13:07,660 Beth? Summer? Anyone? 331 00:13:07,680 --> 00:13:09,831 Dad, it's not real. Neither are you. 332 00:13:09,850 --> 00:13:12,100 If that's true, then you deal with it. 333 00:13:12,120 --> 00:13:14,100 You know what? You're right. 334 00:13:16,930 --> 00:13:19,382 - How about this? - Morty, what are you doing? 335 00:13:19,390 --> 00:13:20,467 Being scared. 336 00:13:25,010 --> 00:13:27,100 How is that not enough fear? 337 00:13:27,110 --> 00:13:28,800 You're the one scaring me, Morty. 338 00:13:28,810 --> 00:13:31,220 - No, no, Dad, it's okay. - It's not okay. 339 00:13:31,240 --> 00:13:32,520 That wasn't normal. 340 00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:37,700 My greatest fear is not being accepted. 341 00:13:37,720 --> 00:13:38,920 It should be. 342 00:13:38,940 --> 00:13:41,140 And you need to fear it a hell of a lot more. 343 00:13:42,300 --> 00:13:43,530 I can do that. 344 00:13:43,550 --> 00:13:44,900 You like that? 345 00:13:44,920 --> 00:13:46,040 Do you want to die? 346 00:13:46,060 --> 00:13:49,704 I have enough unaddressed trauma to flood this hallway. 347 00:13:50,150 --> 00:13:51,940 - _ - You fucking idiot. 348 00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:53,500 This list says "Top Five Things," 349 00:13:53,520 --> 00:13:55,220 and you only wrote down four. 350 00:14:01,170 --> 00:14:03,180 Trust fall. 351 00:14:03,200 --> 00:14:05,730 None of us touch or speak to this kid ever. 352 00:14:05,750 --> 00:14:07,880 Maybe take a picture, 353 00:14:07,900 --> 00:14:09,400 - send it to your friends? - Huh. 354 00:14:09,420 --> 00:14:11,260 Not a bad idea. 355 00:14:11,270 --> 00:14:13,940 How can we do the school play if Johnny has laryngitis? 356 00:14:13,960 --> 00:14:16,449 - There's no understudy. - Put me in the play. 357 00:14:16,460 --> 00:14:17,774 You don't know the lines. 358 00:14:17,790 --> 00:14:20,260 Yes, I do. "Three Days of Rain." 359 00:14:20,280 --> 00:14:21,580 I have it memorized. 360 00:14:21,600 --> 00:14:23,659 And I refuse to prove that until you cast me. 361 00:14:23,670 --> 00:14:26,230 Have it your way, but The New York Times is coming, 362 00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:28,160 and they're doing a feature on the current state 363 00:14:28,170 --> 00:14:29,520 of young American theatre. 364 00:14:31,480 --> 00:14:32,789 Perfect. 365 00:14:32,800 --> 00:14:34,999 It ended in a church? 366 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:37,160 - What? - Yeah, they'd already died. 367 00:14:37,180 --> 00:14:38,800 It was purgatory or something. 368 00:14:38,820 --> 00:14:40,239 How did your universe's version end? 369 00:14:40,240 --> 00:14:42,760 Hmm. Jack, Locke, and Sawyer teamed up to kill a fog monster 370 00:14:42,770 --> 00:14:43,900 and everyone got rescued. 371 00:14:43,920 --> 00:14:46,428 It was one season long, and it was perfect television. 372 00:14:46,440 --> 00:14:48,960 You can be great or you can be around forever, right? 373 00:14:48,980 --> 00:14:52,308 True. True. True. True. 374 00:14:52,320 --> 00:14:54,610 - True. True. - Where's this going? 375 00:14:54,630 --> 00:14:56,240 - We doing robot role play? - True. True. 376 00:14:56,260 --> 00:14:58,080 - I've got oil at home. - True. True. True. 377 00:14:58,100 --> 00:14:59,730 - What was that? Diane. - True. True. 378 00:14:59,750 --> 00:15:01,359 - Diane? Diane? - Hey. 379 00:15:01,370 --> 00:15:02,720 - Stay with me. - Diane. Diane. 380 00:15:02,740 --> 00:15:03,820 - Diane? - Rick? 381 00:15:03,840 --> 00:15:05,560 - What's happening? - Fucking Morty. 382 00:15:05,580 --> 00:15:07,140 He's trying to hog the Hole. 383 00:15:07,160 --> 00:15:08,200 Come on. 384 00:15:08,700 --> 00:15:10,535 _ 385 00:15:14,820 --> 00:15:19,100 Alas, our father is dead. 386 00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:21,170 Walker, are you here? 387 00:15:22,600 --> 00:15:25,341 Uh, hi. I'm Walker. 388 00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:26,968 Uh... 389 00:15:26,980 --> 00:15:31,310 Sure has been raining a lot of days. 390 00:15:32,780 --> 00:15:34,600 What the fuck is he doing? 391 00:15:34,620 --> 00:15:35,980 What's wrong with him? 392 00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:37,145 He's naked. 393 00:15:37,160 --> 00:15:39,240 And why does he look sick? 394 00:15:40,250 --> 00:15:41,790 Because he's dying. 395 00:15:42,710 --> 00:15:43,943 Fuck. 396 00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:45,260 I got to get him out of here. 397 00:15:45,280 --> 00:15:47,400 But if I do, I might have to go with him. 398 00:15:48,200 --> 00:15:50,700 I don't want to. I don't want to, Diane. 399 00:15:50,720 --> 00:15:52,670 I think my greatest fear is letting you go. 400 00:15:52,690 --> 00:15:55,460 That's a good fear, Rick. Keep that fear. 401 00:15:55,480 --> 00:15:57,240 If you don't, you'll kill me. 402 00:15:57,260 --> 00:15:58,560 Again. 403 00:15:58,580 --> 00:16:01,240 I know. But I don't have to kill Morty, too. 404 00:16:01,260 --> 00:16:02,940 How do you know he's even real? 405 00:16:02,960 --> 00:16:04,960 Look at his weird little balls. 406 00:16:06,060 --> 00:16:07,670 Goodbye, Diane. 407 00:16:10,860 --> 00:16:12,050 - Rick? - Shut up, Morty. 408 00:16:12,070 --> 00:16:15,475 DJ, drop that beat. We got to conquer a fear. 409 00:16:17,580 --> 00:16:18,740 ♪ This is my grandson ♪ 410 00:16:18,760 --> 00:16:19,980 ♪ Don't look at his pee-pee ♪ 411 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:22,857 ♪ Instead of staring at Morty ♪ ♪ Put your eyes on me-me ♪ 412 00:16:22,860 --> 00:16:23,860 ♪ I'm a roped-out freak ♪ 413 00:16:23,870 --> 00:16:25,280 ♪ Loose dog in my ass ♪ 414 00:16:25,300 --> 00:16:26,540 ♪ Macaroni in my pocket ♪ 415 00:16:26,560 --> 00:16:28,154 ♪ Rickety masterclass ♪ 416 00:16:28,170 --> 00:16:29,420 ♪ I don't know how to rap ♪ 417 00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:30,680 ♪ I don't know how to rhyme ♪ 418 00:16:30,700 --> 00:16:32,220 ♪ I don't know how to rap ♪ 419 00:16:32,240 --> 00:16:33,680 ♪ Now eat my shit ♪ 420 00:16:34,470 --> 00:16:35,800 Incredible. 421 00:16:35,820 --> 00:16:37,040 ♪ Now throw your hands up ♪ 422 00:16:37,060 --> 00:16:38,610 ♪ And put your hands down ♪ 423 00:16:38,630 --> 00:16:39,750 ♪ Throw your hands up ♪ 424 00:16:39,770 --> 00:16:41,417 ♪ Now put them back down ♪ 425 00:16:41,430 --> 00:16:44,420 ♪ Three days of rain ♪ 426 00:16:47,020 --> 00:16:49,420 That was an astounding feat of personal bravery. 427 00:16:49,440 --> 00:16:52,387 Nudity always makes theatre serious and good. 428 00:16:52,400 --> 00:16:53,890 How do you feel? 429 00:16:53,910 --> 00:16:55,530 Accepted. You? 430 00:16:55,550 --> 00:16:58,540 Pathetic. But... happy? 431 00:17:12,340 --> 00:17:15,451 We did it. We conquered our fears. Right? 432 00:17:18,340 --> 00:17:20,164 Uh, hey, Rick? 433 00:17:20,180 --> 00:17:23,860 You just looked real sad, which I'm afraid of. 434 00:17:23,880 --> 00:17:26,800 You know, of being responsible for your sadness. 435 00:17:26,820 --> 00:17:29,820 Which means I think we might still be in the Hole. 436 00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:32,160 Huh. Well, I am definitely afraid of you 437 00:17:32,180 --> 00:17:33,800 ever knowing anything before me. 438 00:17:33,820 --> 00:17:36,556 So, yeah, I'd say there's a 100% chance that we're still... 439 00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:40,730 God damn it. Is this going to be a whole thing? 440 00:17:40,740 --> 00:17:41,880 No word play, Morty. 441 00:17:41,900 --> 00:17:43,319 We have to figure out our actual fears 442 00:17:43,320 --> 00:17:44,419 if we're ever going to get out of here. 443 00:17:44,420 --> 00:17:45,940 - Actual fears? - Yeah. 444 00:17:45,960 --> 00:17:47,669 Tell me your fucking fear so we can conquer it. 445 00:17:47,670 --> 00:17:49,260 I just had to crucify myself 446 00:17:49,280 --> 00:17:51,220 in order to save you from your Hole wife, 447 00:17:51,240 --> 00:17:53,850 and you think I'm the one with unresolved fears? 448 00:17:53,870 --> 00:17:55,619 I ought to be afraid that we'll never get out, 449 00:17:55,620 --> 00:17:57,450 because you'll never admit that you're afraid. 450 00:18:00,740 --> 00:18:02,020 Okay. Good job. 451 00:18:02,040 --> 00:18:03,240 You conquered it, right? 452 00:18:03,260 --> 00:18:05,710 I think so. How are we supposed to know? 453 00:18:05,730 --> 00:18:07,629 No, no. This is real. I can tell. 454 00:18:07,640 --> 00:18:10,089 You're not afraid that you could be certain about something 455 00:18:10,090 --> 00:18:11,549 and still turn out to be wrong? 456 00:18:12,730 --> 00:18:14,080 You cowardly asshole! 457 00:18:14,100 --> 00:18:15,637 How was I supposed to know? 458 00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:20,090 $8 for a side of bacon? 459 00:18:20,110 --> 00:18:22,119 Are you fucking kidding me? 460 00:18:22,120 --> 00:18:23,960 It's a symptom of a larger concern, Morty. 461 00:18:23,980 --> 00:18:26,380 - If capitalism collapses... - Are we done here? 462 00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:28,299 I don't know. Aren't you a little afraid at this point 463 00:18:28,300 --> 00:18:30,485 - of the Hole itself? - What? 464 00:18:30,500 --> 00:18:32,640 I swear to God, if we're still climbing out 465 00:18:32,660 --> 00:18:34,400 of this fucking hole two seasons from now... 466 00:18:34,420 --> 00:18:36,000 - Maybe that was it. - What? 467 00:18:36,020 --> 00:18:38,840 Maybe we needed to let go of our fear of uncertainty. 468 00:18:38,860 --> 00:18:40,640 - You know? - Right. 469 00:18:40,660 --> 00:18:42,997 I'd say we're pretty native to that at this point. 470 00:18:43,010 --> 00:18:44,900 - Okay. Thank you, Hole. - Thank you, Hole. 471 00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:46,940 We no longer need to know if we're in you. 472 00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:48,640 So, bye. 473 00:18:56,300 --> 00:18:57,780 Are you afraid we're still in it? 474 00:18:57,800 --> 00:18:59,460 I mean, I hope we're not, 475 00:18:59,480 --> 00:19:01,370 - but if we are... - We'll find out eventually. 476 00:19:01,380 --> 00:19:02,740 Which no longer scares me. 477 00:19:02,750 --> 00:19:05,520 Same. Okay. I'm gonna go get drunk. 478 00:19:07,830 --> 00:19:10,060 ♪ "Move on," they say ♪ 479 00:19:10,080 --> 00:19:13,880 ♪ You'll feel better with time ♪ 480 00:19:13,900 --> 00:19:18,020 ♪ But time alone can't heal this heart of mine ♪ 481 00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:22,954 ♪ You can't go back ♪ 482 00:19:22,970 --> 00:19:26,332 ♪ That's the only rule ♪ 483 00:19:26,350 --> 00:19:30,780 ♪ But rules were meant to break when it comes to you ♪ 484 00:19:32,400 --> 00:19:35,883 ♪ I saw time and time ♪ 485 00:19:35,900 --> 00:19:38,302 ♪ Slip by when I withdrew ♪ 486 00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:43,224 ♪ I wandered far and wide without you ♪ 487 00:19:45,120 --> 00:19:46,728 ♪ Without you ♪ 488 00:19:46,740 --> 00:19:49,600 ♪ Ooh-ooh ♪ 489 00:19:49,620 --> 00:19:52,600 ♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh ♪ 490 00:19:52,620 --> 00:19:56,320 ♪ Ooh-ooh ♪ 491 00:19:58,420 --> 00:20:01,610 - ♪ So, I bury my dead ♪ - _ 492 00:20:01,630 --> 00:20:04,412 ♪ And I try to start again ♪ 493 00:20:04,430 --> 00:20:09,540 ♪ But it'll never be the same as it was back then ♪ 494 00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:13,460 ♪ I've seen time and time ♪ 495 00:20:14,360 --> 00:20:17,030 ♪ Slip by, but I'll make do ♪ 496 00:20:17,050 --> 00:20:19,340 - ♪ 'Cause I won't live my life ♪ - Oh, my God! 497 00:20:19,350 --> 00:20:20,730 I've turned into my dad. 498 00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:24,260 Oh, maybe there's no way out. 499 00:20:24,280 --> 00:20:25,720 Maybe we were born here. 500 00:20:25,740 --> 00:20:27,894 Come on. We're gonna get through this. 501 00:20:27,910 --> 00:20:29,437 I'm staying here. 502 00:20:29,450 --> 00:20:32,620 No. We're Rick and Morty. I'm not leaving without you. 503 00:20:32,640 --> 00:20:33,983 What did you say? 504 00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:35,379 I said I'm not leaving you in here. 505 00:20:35,380 --> 00:20:37,028 Come on. You're irreplaceable... 506 00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:39,400 irreplaceable... irreplaceable... irreplaceable... 507 00:20:39,420 --> 00:20:40,990 - What? - Oh, my God. 508 00:20:41,010 --> 00:20:42,720 I know what I'm afraid of. 509 00:20:42,740 --> 00:20:45,411 I'm afraid you'd never say that in real life. 510 00:20:45,430 --> 00:20:47,249 I'm afraid that if I jumped into a hole, 511 00:20:47,250 --> 00:20:49,260 you wouldn't even bother jumping in after me. 512 00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:51,080 You'd just stand there and watch. 513 00:20:51,100 --> 00:20:53,460 This entire thing has been about me. 514 00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:56,620 You're not even in the Hole, are you? 515 00:20:57,700 --> 00:20:59,800 Thank you for visiting the Fear Hole, Morty. 516 00:20:59,820 --> 00:21:03,221 Your fear of relying on Rick has been delicious. 517 00:21:03,240 --> 00:21:05,681 Dear God! 518 00:21:07,160 --> 00:21:09,268 Morty, how was it? 519 00:21:09,280 --> 00:21:10,645 Was it spiders? 520 00:21:10,660 --> 00:21:13,600 Oh. Oh, jeez. Oh, my God, no. 521 00:21:13,620 --> 00:21:16,080 You... You didn't go in at all? 522 00:21:16,100 --> 00:21:17,568 No. It's a one-person ride. 523 00:21:17,580 --> 00:21:19,560 You can't face two fears at the same time. 524 00:21:19,580 --> 00:21:21,781 If my fear was fire and yours was water... 525 00:21:21,800 --> 00:21:23,449 I get it. It's fine. 526 00:21:25,780 --> 00:21:27,399 It really is fine. Huh. 527 00:21:27,400 --> 00:21:29,580 You do seem a little less burdened. 528 00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:32,500 Rick, am I irreplaceable? 529 00:21:32,520 --> 00:21:34,620 I mean, define irreplaceable. 530 00:21:34,640 --> 00:21:36,380 That's good. Good. 531 00:21:37,560 --> 00:21:38,580 I'm back. 532 00:21:39,460 --> 00:21:41,700 Don't! Or I won't know if I'm out. 533 00:21:41,720 --> 00:21:44,040 - Is it that good? Should I go in? - No! 534 00:21:44,060 --> 00:21:45,580 You holding out on me? 535 00:21:45,600 --> 00:21:47,390 You don't want to deal with it, Rick. 536 00:21:47,410 --> 00:21:49,684 There was messed-up mental shit in there. 537 00:21:49,700 --> 00:21:50,980 Like, Diane was in there. 538 00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:52,500 - What? - Not in a good way. 539 00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:54,000 Just trust me. 540 00:21:54,020 --> 00:21:56,640 Okay, buddy. Let's go slam some pancakes. 541 00:22:12,580 --> 00:22:14,039 _ 542 00:22:14,040 --> 00:22:19,547 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - -- www.MY-SUBS.com -- 543 00:22:45,760 --> 00:22:47,830 Oo-wee. How 'bout that? 544 00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:49,640 Season 7. 545 00:22:49,660 --> 00:22:51,880 It was touch and go there for a second. 546 00:22:51,900 --> 00:22:54,420 Remember when I stole my kid? 547 00:22:54,440 --> 00:22:56,740 I stole one of these, too. 548 00:22:59,780 --> 00:23:02,500 - Huh? - It's all about having a goal 549 00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:05,230 and stopping at nothing to achieve it. 550 00:23:05,250 --> 00:23:08,130 Then you'll be fulfilled.