1
00:00:08,842 --> 00:00:11,845
Who's ready for Rick's
famous spaghetti?!
2
00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:13,388
I love
Spaghetti Thursdays!
3
00:00:13,388 --> 00:00:15,807
Oh, my God, Rick, i-it's like
it's better every time!
4
00:00:15,807 --> 00:00:17,058
Hell yeah,
you like that?!
5
00:00:17,058 --> 00:00:18,893
That's-a some
good spaghetti!
6
00:00:18,893 --> 00:00:21,271
Grandpa Rick,
I'm skull emoji but words.
7
00:00:21,271 --> 00:00:23,773
Sauce? More sauce?
Oh, we gots the sauce!
8
00:00:23,773 --> 00:00:26,109
Dad, you-- you had
a job interview, right?
9
00:00:26,109 --> 00:00:27,527
Bombed it!
10
00:00:27,527 --> 00:00:29,404
But it's nothing a little
Bolognese won't cure!
11
00:00:29,404 --> 00:00:31,448
Dad, this noodle
is sooo tender.
12
00:00:31,448 --> 00:00:34,951
A little spicy!
A little sweet!
13
00:00:34,951 --> 00:00:36,286
It's so nice that we're talking,
you know,
14
00:00:36,286 --> 00:00:37,495
all-- all--
all talking
15
00:00:37,495 --> 00:00:38,747
because we're a family
and everything,
16
00:00:38,747 --> 00:00:40,373
and this a good time
we're having.
17
00:00:40,373 --> 00:00:41,458
Is there any more?!
18
00:00:41,458 --> 00:00:42,834
Seconds?
Thirds?
19
00:00:42,834 --> 00:00:45,879
We spa-gots as much
as you can spag-eat!
20
00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:46,963
Rick,
I-I got to know, like,
21
00:00:46,963 --> 00:00:49,382
wh-what's the secret
ingredient--
22
00:00:49,382 --> 00:00:51,801
God, no! Why?
Why? No!
23
00:00:51,801 --> 00:00:53,052
Why is it always
this shit with you?!
24
00:00:53,052 --> 00:00:54,721
O-Of course
it's a person!
25
00:00:54,721 --> 00:00:56,973
Rick, why couldn't
it just be spaghetti?
26
00:00:56,973 --> 00:01:30,840
{\an8}♪
27
00:01:30,840 --> 00:01:32,425
{\an8}Rick:
I'm just going to say this
28
00:01:32,425 --> 00:01:34,177
{\an8}as simply as possible
and let you not believe me--
29
00:01:34,177 --> 00:01:36,930
{\an8}on this planet, people that kill
themselves turn into spaghetti.
30
00:01:36,930 --> 00:01:38,181
{\an8}What?
31
00:01:38,181 --> 00:01:40,433
{\an8}I know, you're a visual learner,
so follow me.
32
00:01:42,101 --> 00:01:43,937
{\an8}Oh, hi,
Doctor Hotpenis.
33
00:01:43,937 --> 00:01:45,605
{\an8}You're not supposed to
bring patients--
34
00:01:45,605 --> 00:01:49,067
{\an8}Hi, Michael. It's okay.
This alien boy has space cancer
35
00:01:49,067 --> 00:01:51,194
{\an8}and his dying wish
is to see deader people
36
00:01:51,194 --> 00:01:52,695
{\an8}so he can feel superior.
37
00:01:52,695 --> 00:01:55,031
{\an8}All you had to say.
38
00:01:55,031 --> 00:01:56,699
{\an8}Check it out. Murdered.
39
00:01:56,699 --> 00:01:58,243
{\an8}Oh, gross!
40
00:01:58,243 --> 00:01:59,828
{\an8}Car crash.
Oh!
41
00:01:59,828 --> 00:02:01,871
{\an8}And suicide.
42
00:02:01,871 --> 00:02:03,540
{\an8}Ugh, Rick, I don't--
43
00:02:03,540 --> 00:02:05,708
{\an8}Wait,
what is that smell?
44
00:02:05,708 --> 00:02:07,544
{\an8}You know God damn well
what it is, baby.
45
00:02:07,544 --> 00:02:09,212
{\an8}Get in here.
Oh, don't do that!
46
00:02:09,212 --> 00:02:11,506
{\an8}You've been doing it for weeks
every spaghetti night!
47
00:02:11,506 --> 00:02:13,341
{\an8}Come on, Morty.
Choo choo plane!
48
00:02:13,341 --> 00:02:15,260
{\an8}Gross!
Come on!
49
00:02:15,260 --> 00:02:16,511
{\an8}God damn!
50
00:02:16,511 --> 00:02:18,555
{\an8}Telling you!
Why?! How?!
51
00:02:18,555 --> 00:02:20,765
{\an8}Their cortisol increases
the starch content
52
00:02:20,765 --> 00:02:22,350
{\an8}in their bloodstream,
changing their intestines
53
00:02:22,350 --> 00:02:23,977
{\an8}into one
long spaghetti noodle,
54
00:02:23,977 --> 00:02:26,521
{\an8}and the surrounding tissues
into a spicy-sweet hematoma
55
00:02:26,521 --> 00:02:28,356
{\an8}that we would call
a Bolognese.
56
00:02:28,356 --> 00:02:30,400
{\an8}But it takes
a lot of cortisol...
57
00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:31,818
{\an8}like a suicidal amount.
58
00:02:31,818 --> 00:02:33,194
{\an8}I-It's almost
better cold!
59
00:02:33,194 --> 00:02:35,029
{\an8}Wouldn't go that far,
don't be a hipster.
60
00:02:35,029 --> 00:02:36,239
{\an8}Excuse me.
61
00:02:36,239 --> 00:02:38,324
{\an8}Are you two
eating a corpse?
62
00:02:38,324 --> 00:02:39,742
{\an8}It's okay!
I-It's spaghetti.
63
00:02:39,742 --> 00:02:41,035
{\an8}Morty, they don't know
what that is.
64
00:02:41,035 --> 00:02:42,412
{\an8}I'm calling the police!
65
00:02:42,412 --> 00:02:44,163
{\an8}Before you do that, just--
No, Rick, stop--
66
00:02:44,163 --> 00:02:45,748
{\an8}What?!
Where am I?
67
00:02:45,748 --> 00:02:47,667
{\an8}In a morgue,
eating bodies!
We're what?!
68
00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:50,545
{\an8}Stop using that thing!
What thing? Who are we?
69
00:02:50,545 --> 00:02:52,380
{\an8}We were just leaving.
All you had to say!
70
00:02:52,380 --> 00:02:54,465
{\an8}Whose car is this?
Whose sun visor is this?
71
00:02:54,465 --> 00:02:55,925
{\an8}What's a sun?
72
00:02:55,925 --> 00:02:59,888
{\an8}Jesus, sorry,
that's always embarrassing.
73
00:02:59,888 --> 00:03:02,432
{\an8}But you see what I mean now?
Best spaghetti in the galaxy
74
00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:03,850
{\an8}and it's 100%
guilt-free.
75
00:03:03,850 --> 00:03:05,560
{\an8}I wanna know their names.
Who?
76
00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:07,020
{\an8}Michael?
Coroner Number One?
77
00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:09,272
{\an8}The people we've been eating
every spaghetti night!
78
00:03:09,272 --> 00:03:10,773
{\an8}Do you even know
their names?
79
00:03:10,773 --> 00:03:12,525
{\an8}I'm not giving you
your spaghettises' names!
80
00:03:12,525 --> 00:03:14,819
{\an8}You've found my line, Morty!
I-I find that ghoulish!
81
00:03:14,819 --> 00:03:17,030
{\an8}I-I want their names
o-or I'm telling Mom
82
00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:18,239
{\an8}and no more
spaghetti night!
83
00:03:18,239 --> 00:03:19,616
You suck!
Where's the thing?
84
00:03:19,616 --> 00:03:21,284
Where's the "Men in Black"
thing?
Names!
85
00:03:21,284 --> 00:03:22,535
And if you know
the fuckin' names
86
00:03:22,535 --> 00:03:23,745
of your spaghettis,
that's it?
87
00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:25,163
This is done?
It's all I ask!
88
00:03:25,163 --> 00:03:26,915
You won't get overwhelmed
with even more guilt
89
00:03:26,915 --> 00:03:28,458
and then demand to go
to their fuckin' funeral?
90
00:03:28,458 --> 00:03:30,460
Just their names
and then I'm done.
91
00:03:30,460 --> 00:03:31,753
I promise.
92
00:03:31,753 --> 00:03:34,088
I fucking hate you.
93
00:03:34,088 --> 00:03:35,715
I just want to
pay my respects!
94
00:03:35,715 --> 00:03:37,300
The only reason
you're still alive
95
00:03:37,300 --> 00:03:41,054
is because you don't turn
delicious when you die.
96
00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:46,851
Thank you for that
moment of silence.
97
00:03:46,851 --> 00:03:49,103
I'd like to open it up
to the congregation,
98
00:03:49,103 --> 00:03:53,316
if anyone would like to say
a few words about Lawrence.
99
00:03:54,150 --> 00:03:56,027
[ Coughs ]
100
00:03:58,529 --> 00:04:01,199
Or...
another moment of silence.
101
00:04:01,199 --> 00:04:03,618
Geez, no wonder
he killed himself.
102
00:04:03,618 --> 00:04:04,994
Okay, let's--
103
00:04:04,994 --> 00:04:06,037
Oh, for--
104
00:04:06,037 --> 00:04:07,747
Hi. Um...
105
00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:10,667
I just want to be honest
about something.
106
00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:12,293
After Lawrence died,
107
00:04:12,293 --> 00:04:14,796
we, uh, ate him.
108
00:04:14,796 --> 00:04:16,923
[ Gasping, murmuring ]
Wait, we're not...
109
00:04:16,923 --> 00:04:19,801
werewolves or-- or anything,
we-- we come from a planet,
110
00:04:19,801 --> 00:04:22,387
where, to us, when you guys
kill yourselves,
111
00:04:22,387 --> 00:04:25,515
you turn into what
my planet considers food.
112
00:04:25,515 --> 00:04:28,476
Spaghetti.
It brought us together.
113
00:04:28,476 --> 00:04:30,728
Lawrence
brought us together.
114
00:04:30,728 --> 00:04:33,773
It just felt wrong not
having anyone know that.
115
00:04:33,773 --> 00:04:35,358
But he was delicious.
116
00:04:35,358 --> 00:04:39,737
I-I hope that helps
make it right.
117
00:04:39,737 --> 00:04:41,322
That should do it, buddy.
118
00:04:41,322 --> 00:04:43,366
Everybody enjoy
your closure.
119
00:04:44,951 --> 00:04:47,996
So we were eating... people.
120
00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:49,372
I-I'm afraid so.
121
00:04:49,372 --> 00:04:52,375
They were so... spaghettiesque.
122
00:04:52,375 --> 00:04:53,710
Yes, they were.
123
00:04:53,710 --> 00:04:55,962
It's going to be...
hard to...
124
00:04:55,962 --> 00:04:57,714
Hard to put out of your mind, yes,
125
00:04:57,714 --> 00:05:00,299
which is why I thought it best
to keep you all in the dark.
126
00:05:00,299 --> 00:05:01,426
So...
127
00:05:01,426 --> 00:05:03,094
Morty ruined
spaghetti night.
128
00:05:03,094 --> 00:05:04,887
- Correct.
- Summer! It was people!
129
00:05:04,887 --> 00:05:06,597
It was people, Summer.
130
00:05:06,597 --> 00:05:08,224
Which is disgusting.
131
00:05:08,224 --> 00:05:10,226
And not cool
to lie about.
132
00:05:10,226 --> 00:05:11,394
Correct.
133
00:05:11,394 --> 00:05:13,563
But it should also be noted,
to Morty,
134
00:05:13,563 --> 00:05:14,981
that it's not cool
to tattle.
135
00:05:14,981 --> 00:05:16,607
Dad!
They were delicious!
136
00:05:16,607 --> 00:05:18,693
So keep eating them!
We can't now!
137
00:05:18,693 --> 00:05:19,777
Because of you!
138
00:05:19,777 --> 00:05:20,987
Sorry,
[Clears throat] Morty.
139
00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:22,780
That was
terrible parenting.
140
00:05:22,780 --> 00:05:25,742
You did the "right" thing.
141
00:05:25,742 --> 00:05:29,245
We are technically very happy
to be better informed.
142
00:05:29,245 --> 00:05:30,621
First octopus,
now this.
143
00:05:30,621 --> 00:05:32,165
Have-- Have we thought about
just giving up
144
00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:34,292
and joining the fascist
half of the country?
145
00:05:34,292 --> 00:05:35,418
- No!
- No!
146
00:05:35,418 --> 00:05:37,003
Just saying,
they get to do more.
147
00:05:37,003 --> 00:05:40,173
Well, I guess I'll go to my room
since everyone hates me now.
148
00:05:41,674 --> 00:05:42,925
Oh.
Sorry.
149
00:05:42,925 --> 00:05:44,260
- Good night, Morty.
- Good night, Morty.
150
00:05:44,260 --> 00:05:46,346
Goodnight, Morty.
151
00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:48,890
Hey, big boy.
Are you depressed?
152
00:05:48,890 --> 00:05:51,350
Oooooh,
mama likes depression.
153
00:05:51,350 --> 00:05:53,144
Oopsie,
I spilled my milk.
154
00:05:53,144 --> 00:05:54,520
Now we're both sad.
155
00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:55,897
I'm a bad family therapist
farm girl.
156
00:05:55,897 --> 00:05:59,567
[ Knock on window ]
157
00:05:59,567 --> 00:06:01,444
Space Ship:
Hello, Morty Smith.
158
00:06:01,444 --> 00:06:04,489
You are invited
to 41-Kepler B.
159
00:06:04,489 --> 00:06:06,824
You know it as
Spaghetti Planet.
160
00:06:06,824 --> 00:06:07,909
You're not in trouble.
161
00:06:07,909 --> 00:06:09,952
We just want to talk.
162
00:06:09,952 --> 00:06:12,330
Can that thing
support my weight?
163
00:06:12,330 --> 00:06:13,998
It should.
164
00:06:13,998 --> 00:06:15,792
Uh, o-okay...
165
00:06:15,792 --> 00:06:17,126
um...
up here?
166
00:06:17,126 --> 00:06:18,753
Oh, uh, geez.
167
00:06:18,753 --> 00:06:20,171
Ever heard of a ramp?
168
00:06:20,171 --> 00:06:22,381
This is a ramp.
Uh-huh.
169
00:06:24,759 --> 00:06:27,553
Hi, Morty, I'm the president
of this planet.
170
00:06:27,553 --> 00:06:29,597
I saw the video of you
at that funeral.
171
00:06:29,597 --> 00:06:31,099
I'm sorry.
Don't be.
172
00:06:31,099 --> 00:06:33,643
It was quite the... revelation.
173
00:06:33,643 --> 00:06:34,811
Uh, would you...
174
00:06:34,811 --> 00:06:36,479
mind...
showing us?
175
00:06:36,479 --> 00:06:38,648
Uh, this is
the..."spaghetti"
176
00:06:38,648 --> 00:06:40,858
of a person that
took their own life.
177
00:06:40,858 --> 00:06:42,652
They did
consent to be eaten.
178
00:06:42,652 --> 00:06:44,654
Uh, okay.
179
00:06:44,654 --> 00:06:45,613
[ Gags ]
180
00:06:45,613 --> 00:06:47,031
[ Retches ]
181
00:06:47,031 --> 00:06:48,616
[ Slurping ]
182
00:06:48,616 --> 00:06:51,160
Wow, yeah,
a-amazing as always.
183
00:06:51,160 --> 00:06:52,662
N-Not gonna lie.
184
00:06:52,662 --> 00:06:55,957
And would you consider yourself
a typical Earthian?
185
00:06:55,957 --> 00:06:59,293
Well, on Earth, it's considered
inferior to be typical,
186
00:06:59,293 --> 00:07:01,921
so we're all very special
and different,
187
00:07:01,921 --> 00:07:04,173
but we definitely
all do like spaghetti.
188
00:07:04,173 --> 00:07:07,009
All...
eight billion of you?
Oooh.
189
00:07:07,009 --> 00:07:09,971
Morty, how would you feel
about being a kind of...
190
00:07:09,971 --> 00:07:13,474
ambassador?
A liaison between our worlds.
191
00:07:13,474 --> 00:07:15,143
Oh.
Now hold on.
192
00:07:15,143 --> 00:07:17,103
I-I went to that funeral
because--
193
00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:18,563
Because you felt bad.
194
00:07:18,563 --> 00:07:20,731
Because you didn't
have permission.
195
00:07:20,731 --> 00:07:22,483
Show him.
196
00:07:22,483 --> 00:07:24,819
My name is
Tanya Radcliffe.
197
00:07:24,819 --> 00:07:27,446
I've been living in pain
for years,
198
00:07:27,446 --> 00:07:31,450
I've lost all my loved ones,
I've got nothing.
199
00:07:31,450 --> 00:07:35,663
So when doctors told me I could
finally have the "right to die"
200
00:07:35,663 --> 00:07:39,125
if I agree to be dinner
for some alien boy,
201
00:07:39,125 --> 00:07:43,754
I simply said,
"I hope I'm delicious."
202
00:07:44,881 --> 00:07:46,132
God damn.
203
00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:49,135
Mm, and would you say
that makes it taste better?
204
00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:51,679
It makes it go down
a lot easier.
205
00:07:51,679 --> 00:07:53,264
Oh, I like that.
206
00:07:53,264 --> 00:07:56,267
Maybe it's time we allow
some people the right to die
207
00:07:56,267 --> 00:07:57,602
and be delicious.
208
00:07:57,602 --> 00:07:59,520
Please feel free
to finish Tanya.
209
00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:00,688
It is what she wanted.
210
00:08:00,688 --> 00:08:02,648
No.
No, I-I-I think I'm good.
211
00:08:02,648 --> 00:08:03,733
Thanks.
212
00:08:03,733 --> 00:08:06,819
Tanya,
you really were tasty.
213
00:08:08,821 --> 00:08:12,033
Actually,
can I take her to go?
214
00:08:12,033 --> 00:08:14,493
Who's ready for
more ethical spaghetti?!
215
00:08:14,493 --> 00:08:16,495
Me!
I love this ethical shit!
216
00:08:16,495 --> 00:08:18,456
Full admission,
I was fine before too!
217
00:08:18,456 --> 00:08:19,999
God, this is so good!
218
00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:21,417
Pass the parmeesian!
219
00:08:21,417 --> 00:08:22,627
Where's Dad?
220
00:08:22,627 --> 00:08:24,086
Why does he keep missing
spaghetti night?
221
00:08:24,086 --> 00:08:26,130
I guess he got butthurt
because Morty high-roaded him
222
00:08:26,130 --> 00:08:27,882
and got us
the delicious spaghetti
223
00:08:27,882 --> 00:08:29,425
without all the lies
and nihilism.
224
00:08:29,425 --> 00:08:32,762
And another cheer for the added
bonus of no Rick--
225
00:08:32,762 --> 00:08:34,430
Boom.
Sorry to interrupt
226
00:08:34,430 --> 00:08:36,057
Morty's perfect
spaghetti night,
227
00:08:36,057 --> 00:08:37,475
but thought
he'd wanna see this.
228
00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:38,976
Whoa, what the fuck
is that?!
229
00:08:38,976 --> 00:08:42,521
"Morty-O's Suicide Spaghetti
is 100% ethical,
230
00:08:42,521 --> 00:08:44,106
single-origin pasta."
231
00:08:44,106 --> 00:08:45,441
Oh, dear God.
232
00:08:45,441 --> 00:08:47,109
Lemme guess, you went back
to the planet,
233
00:08:47,109 --> 00:08:49,195
gave some thoughtful insight
to their leader,
234
00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:51,781
and now they're selling their
dead at every Space Walmart.
235
00:08:51,781 --> 00:08:54,700
I-I did but I didn't say
to do this!
236
00:08:54,700 --> 00:08:56,244
Is this people,
or not people?
237
00:08:56,244 --> 00:08:59,330
I-I just need to know how much
I should pretend to be upset.
238
00:08:59,330 --> 00:09:01,540
This seems to be Roger.
239
00:09:01,540 --> 00:09:02,959
Hi.
I'm Roger Wayne Marder.
240
00:09:02,959 --> 00:09:04,669
I was a serial killer
and cannibal,
241
00:09:04,669 --> 00:09:06,587
and now I get to kill myself
and be food for you,
242
00:09:06,587 --> 00:09:09,882
which I suppose is a silver
lining to all my misdeeds.
243
00:09:09,882 --> 00:09:12,927
Anyway, please enjoy me.
244
00:09:12,927 --> 00:09:14,971
So "yes" to people?
245
00:09:14,971 --> 00:09:17,348
Wow.
I-I mean, on the bright side,
246
00:09:17,348 --> 00:09:19,100
I-I feel like one
could look at this
247
00:09:19,100 --> 00:09:22,728
as a really nice epilogue t-to
a story about telling the truth.
248
00:09:22,728 --> 00:09:25,523
Uh-huh, care to see
that epilogue?
249
00:09:25,523 --> 00:09:26,565
[ Horns honking ]
250
00:09:26,565 --> 00:09:29,318
What is all this?
251
00:09:29,318 --> 00:09:32,321
Cans of spaghetti selling out
to every neighboring planet.
252
00:09:32,321 --> 00:09:36,325
Wanna go see how ethical
it is down there?
253
00:09:36,325 --> 00:09:38,995
This is Spaghetti Planet?
What happened?
254
00:09:38,995 --> 00:09:40,288
You happened.
255
00:09:40,288 --> 00:09:42,873
You happened all over
those billboards.
256
00:09:42,873 --> 00:09:44,458
Oh, geez, oh, no.
257
00:09:44,458 --> 00:09:47,795
See that? They call that bridge
"The Most Scenic Jump."
258
00:09:47,795 --> 00:09:49,338
There used to be
safety rails.
259
00:09:49,338 --> 00:09:52,425
They melted them down
for giant spaghetti strainers.
260
00:09:52,425 --> 00:09:53,843
You wanna
turn on the radio?
261
00:09:53,843 --> 00:09:55,511
I get it,
it's all Enya.
262
00:09:55,511 --> 00:09:57,346
Nope,
all morning zoo teams.
263
00:09:57,346 --> 00:09:59,348
Just patter.
No songs.
264
00:09:59,348 --> 00:10:00,850
Oh, and for TV?
265
00:10:00,850 --> 00:10:03,436
Wall-to-wall reality television,
but not the good kind.
266
00:10:03,436 --> 00:10:05,688
It's like their whole planet
was bought by Discovery.
267
00:10:05,688 --> 00:10:07,356
Jesus Christ,
this is depressing.
268
00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:09,191
That's definitely
what they're going for.
269
00:10:09,191 --> 00:10:10,526
Look at this shit.
270
00:10:10,526 --> 00:10:12,987
They dyed their sun
institutional gray.
271
00:10:12,987 --> 00:10:15,281
That's not easy,
kind of impressed.
272
00:10:15,281 --> 00:10:17,616
And all of it
is thanks to...
273
00:10:17,616 --> 00:10:18,909
Oh, God.
274
00:10:18,909 --> 00:10:20,870
I'm a murderer.
275
00:10:20,870 --> 00:10:22,079
Oh, no, Morty.
276
00:10:22,079 --> 00:10:24,457
What you did was
much more indirect.
277
00:10:26,584 --> 00:10:28,169
I understand your concerns,
but look around.
278
00:10:28,169 --> 00:10:30,171
With what's coming in from
intergalactic spaghetti trade,
279
00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:34,342
we've decreased our debt,
are making a lot of money.
280
00:10:35,843 --> 00:10:38,220
We've got clean energy.
That space where you paused
281
00:10:38,220 --> 00:10:39,847
is where you should have said
"mental healthcare."
282
00:10:39,847 --> 00:10:43,059
Alright, we had to put our
fingers on the scale, a little.
283
00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:45,853
But if we stop this,
the supply chain crumbles
284
00:10:45,853 --> 00:10:47,813
and kills
the global economy.
285
00:10:47,813 --> 00:10:49,482
How many people
will suffer then?
286
00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:53,694
Okay, tough problem, definitely
a spicy meat-a-ball.
287
00:10:53,694 --> 00:10:55,237
Bu-Bu-But we can fix it.
Right, Rick?
288
00:10:55,237 --> 00:10:57,323
You mean me.
You want me to fix it.
289
00:10:57,323 --> 00:10:58,657
Uh, a moment?
290
00:10:58,657 --> 00:10:59,825
Yes,
I want you to fix it.
291
00:10:59,825 --> 00:11:01,160
None of this
would have happened
292
00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:02,745
if you'd been honest
about the spaghetti.
293
00:11:02,745 --> 00:11:05,289
Morty, I lied to protect you.
You told the truth to hurt me.
294
00:11:05,289 --> 00:11:07,249
I can't travel the galaxy
with you if every time
295
00:11:07,249 --> 00:11:08,834
we come near
a fucked up system,
296
00:11:08,834 --> 00:11:11,087
you leap into its wires
and electrocute yourself.
297
00:11:11,087 --> 00:11:13,130
I promise to stop.
You what?
298
00:11:13,130 --> 00:11:14,673
If you help me,
I-I promise
299
00:11:14,673 --> 00:11:16,342
I'll never look under
the curtain at a Rick thing
300
00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:18,260
to figure out
what's bad about it ever again.
301
00:11:18,260 --> 00:11:20,179
And you can never
say no to me.
302
00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:21,305
What are you,
Keith Raniere?
303
00:11:21,305 --> 00:11:22,598
For two weeks.
Fine.
304
00:11:22,598 --> 00:11:24,308
My grandson kissed my ass
so I'm in.
305
00:11:24,308 --> 00:11:27,395
Okay, so, w-we just need
to figure out something else
306
00:11:27,395 --> 00:11:30,356
besides people to put
in the cans, right?
307
00:11:30,356 --> 00:11:33,818
But people are the spaghetti,
that's the whole thing.
308
00:11:33,818 --> 00:11:36,112
But what if
they weren't?
309
00:11:36,112 --> 00:11:37,988
I'm listening.
Me, too.
310
00:11:37,988 --> 00:11:41,992
I mean, what if we make
something like a person?
311
00:11:41,992 --> 00:11:43,285
Like...
312
00:11:43,285 --> 00:11:44,495
Rick, y-you're always
doing clones, right?
313
00:11:44,495 --> 00:11:45,996
What are you
suggesting here?
314
00:11:45,996 --> 00:11:48,165
A sped-up life span
and indoctrination program?
315
00:11:48,165 --> 00:11:50,292
Limiting their exposure
to the world and convincing them
316
00:11:50,292 --> 00:11:53,170
that becoming spaghetti
is their destiny?
317
00:11:53,170 --> 00:11:55,631
[ Alarm blaring, dogs barking ]
318
00:11:55,631 --> 00:11:57,800
{\an8}♪
319
00:11:57,800 --> 00:11:59,844
I won't be
delicious for them!
320
00:11:59,844 --> 00:12:03,389
I love you,
Clone-5617B!
321
00:12:03,389 --> 00:12:04,348
[ Gunshots ]
322
00:12:04,348 --> 00:12:07,560
[ Bodies thud ]
323
00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:10,104
That was some speed run of
"Never Let Me Go," huh?
324
00:12:10,104 --> 00:12:11,480
Spoilers, Rick!
325
00:12:11,480 --> 00:12:13,732
Eh, I guess all clone stories
turn out the same way.
326
00:12:13,732 --> 00:12:17,653
So, we're back to the regular
people, regular suicides?
327
00:12:17,653 --> 00:12:18,863
No, no,
hold on, hold on.
328
00:12:18,863 --> 00:12:20,156
We can do this.
329
00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:22,741
Maybe we make them less... people.
330
00:12:22,741 --> 00:12:25,953
H-How much of a people do they
have to be to become spaghetti?
331
00:12:25,953 --> 00:12:27,496
Oooooh, gray areas!
332
00:12:27,496 --> 00:12:28,873
My specialty!
333
00:12:28,873 --> 00:12:30,416
Subject one.
334
00:12:30,416 --> 00:12:32,376
No frontal lobe,
no empathy centers.
335
00:12:32,376 --> 00:12:35,045
Otherwise the same physiology
as a person.
336
00:12:35,045 --> 00:12:37,965
Unfortunately,
to this guy,
337
00:12:37,965 --> 00:12:39,842
there's no difference
between life and death.
338
00:12:39,842 --> 00:12:41,760
So no spaghetti.
339
00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:43,471
Then there's this one.
340
00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:45,681
It's in horrible, unimaginable
pain from the moment it's born.
341
00:12:45,681 --> 00:12:47,016
Oh, geez,
oh, no, Rick!
342
00:12:47,016 --> 00:12:49,185
And so I didn't even
bother to make it
343
00:12:49,185 --> 00:12:50,853
because I knew
you'd take issue.
344
00:12:50,853 --> 00:12:52,938
Even though you'd be doing it
a favor by ending its life.
345
00:12:52,938 --> 00:12:55,024
Fuck you.
You might want to examine
that Trolley Problem
346
00:12:55,024 --> 00:12:56,442
at some point, Morty.
347
00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:58,235
Anyway,
here's the last one.
348
00:12:58,235 --> 00:13:00,029
Kept the brain stem,
internal motor functions.
349
00:13:00,029 --> 00:13:03,407
But essentially just a headless,
boneless torso.
350
00:13:03,407 --> 00:13:05,701
There's...
spaghetti inside that?
351
00:13:05,701 --> 00:13:06,869
Theoretically, yes.
352
00:13:06,869 --> 00:13:10,039
The problem is the...
y-you know.
353
00:13:10,039 --> 00:13:14,168
Cou-Could you, um, like...
354
00:13:14,168 --> 00:13:16,879
What is that? Wh-What are you--
Is this charades?
355
00:13:16,879 --> 00:13:18,297
Okay, okay, are you
making a fist?
356
00:13:18,297 --> 00:13:20,382
W-Wait, is that supposed
to be a phone?
357
00:13:20,382 --> 00:13:22,426
Ah, fuck it,
just spell it out for me.
358
00:13:22,426 --> 00:13:26,055
Um, maybe give them
a claw-like hand
359
00:13:26,055 --> 00:13:29,642
so they can, ya know,
stab themselves to death?
360
00:13:29,642 --> 00:13:31,060
All you had to say.
361
00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:35,147
Well, this is some solution
you guys have cooked up.
362
00:13:35,147 --> 00:13:59,046
{\an8}♪
363
00:13:59,046 --> 00:14:01,006
Spaghetti!
Technically.
364
00:14:01,006 --> 00:14:02,299
Good enough for me.
365
00:14:02,299 --> 00:14:04,468
We need to fill 100,000 cans
by the weekend.
366
00:14:04,468 --> 00:14:08,430
So let's fire up
these chunky boys!
367
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:12,810
Torso's rights!
Torso's rights!
368
00:14:12,810 --> 00:14:17,273
The new spaghetti sucks!
We want authentic spaghetti!
369
00:14:17,273 --> 00:14:18,524
Oh, were you--
370
00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:20,442
Wait, you're gonna
blow yourself up?
371
00:14:20,442 --> 00:14:22,278
Yeah,
but if you wanna do it--
372
00:14:22,278 --> 00:14:24,697
Well, you clearly have
a morally superior position,
373
00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:26,865
so please, go ahead.
374
00:14:26,865 --> 00:14:28,158
You just want me
to kill myself
375
00:14:28,158 --> 00:14:29,743
so you can eat
the spaghetti, right?
376
00:14:29,743 --> 00:14:31,412
Fuckin' alien piece of shit.
377
00:14:31,412 --> 00:14:33,080
Oh, fuck you!
Fuck you!
378
00:14:35,374 --> 00:14:38,669
[ All coughing ]
379
00:14:38,669 --> 00:14:41,922
How long does a society
take to collapse?
380
00:14:41,922 --> 00:14:43,257
Let's find out.
381
00:14:43,257 --> 00:14:44,300
[ Horns honking ]
382
00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:45,634
Ay!
What's the fuckin' hold-up?
383
00:14:45,634 --> 00:14:48,095
I've got an entire planet
waiting on delivery!
384
00:14:48,095 --> 00:14:49,471
They say they're out
of spaghetti!
385
00:14:49,471 --> 00:14:52,308
Then let's go down there
and make some!
386
00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:55,269
[ Screaming ]
387
00:14:55,269 --> 00:15:02,985
- Kill yourself.
- Kill yourself...
388
00:15:02,985 --> 00:15:04,361
Madame President:
I understand.
389
00:15:04,361 --> 00:15:06,447
Divert half of the armed patrols
to civil unrest,
390
00:15:06,447 --> 00:15:08,365
the other half
to planetary defense.
391
00:15:08,365 --> 00:15:11,118
Take every action necessary
to restore order.
392
00:15:11,118 --> 00:15:13,329
Still didn't hear much diverting
towards mental healthcare--
393
00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:14,663
The brainstorming is over,
394
00:15:14,663 --> 00:15:16,749
you ghoulish little
corpse-eating alien!
395
00:15:16,749 --> 00:15:17,958
You've helped enough!
396
00:15:17,958 --> 00:15:19,293
Fuck!
397
00:15:19,293 --> 00:15:21,462
We owe so much spaghetti
to so many planets
398
00:15:21,462 --> 00:15:23,255
that we're all going to
have to kill ourselves.
399
00:15:23,255 --> 00:15:24,715
Slow down, slow down.
400
00:15:24,715 --> 00:15:27,092
Rick can synthesize anything
he gets a sample of.
401
00:15:27,092 --> 00:15:28,802
Can't we still try that?
402
00:15:28,802 --> 00:15:31,305
I mean,
is there anyone else left
403
00:15:31,305 --> 00:15:33,015
who might wanna
kill themselves?
404
00:15:33,015 --> 00:15:36,852
There's one,
but good luck.
405
00:15:36,852 --> 00:15:38,437
Two months to live.
406
00:15:38,437 --> 00:15:40,356
Bedridden,
terrible pain.
407
00:15:40,356 --> 00:15:42,691
Whoa.
Why hasn't he done it yet?
408
00:15:42,691 --> 00:15:44,902
Hey!
Fuck you,
spaghetti child!
409
00:15:44,902 --> 00:15:46,111
What gives?!
410
00:15:46,111 --> 00:15:48,864
I'm in pain
and I wish I could die,
411
00:15:48,864 --> 00:15:52,076
but I won't feed
your sick system of profit.
412
00:15:52,076 --> 00:15:54,370
Integrity means
living with pain.
413
00:15:54,370 --> 00:15:59,166
What if I told you this would
end the spaghetti trade forever?
414
00:15:59,166 --> 00:16:01,710
What do you mean?
I'll explain on the way.
415
00:16:03,754 --> 00:16:05,631
[ Bottles clatter ]
416
00:16:08,926 --> 00:16:10,511
Did you have a,
like a...
417
00:16:10,511 --> 00:16:12,721
euthanasia chamber
ready to go?
418
00:16:12,721 --> 00:16:14,890
It's just a place.
419
00:16:14,890 --> 00:16:16,850
[ Screaming ]
420
00:16:16,850 --> 00:16:20,604
Hey! Hey!
Everyone stop! Stop!
421
00:16:20,604 --> 00:16:22,648
I have a solution
to get you all spaghetti.
422
00:16:22,648 --> 00:16:25,109
We're gonna do this
one last time.
423
00:16:25,109 --> 00:16:27,069
This guy here,
he's gonna do the deed,
424
00:16:27,069 --> 00:16:28,570
and I-I'll synthesize it.
425
00:16:28,570 --> 00:16:30,781
This is the Kitty Hawk
of our Wright Brothers flight,
426
00:16:30,781 --> 00:16:34,410
or the fill-in-the-blank
from your fill-in-the-planet.
427
00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:36,412
Now, Fred,
just think about your life.
428
00:16:36,412 --> 00:16:39,498
This machine will put it
on screen for everyone to see.
429
00:16:39,498 --> 00:16:42,459
When you're ready,
press the button.
430
00:16:44,253 --> 00:16:46,422
[ Door opens, closes ]
431
00:16:46,422 --> 00:16:48,340
D-Do you think
this is gonna work?
432
00:16:48,340 --> 00:16:49,425
Trust me.
433
00:16:49,425 --> 00:16:52,344
[ Groans ]
434
00:16:52,344 --> 00:16:56,098
[ Beeping ]
435
00:16:56,098 --> 00:17:11,447
{\an8}♪
436
00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:13,866
♪ Maybe ♪
437
00:17:13,866 --> 00:17:16,535
♪ I don't really wanna know ♪
438
00:17:16,535 --> 00:17:19,413
♪ How your garden grows ♪
439
00:17:19,413 --> 00:17:22,750
♪ 'Cause I just wanna fly ♪
440
00:17:22,750 --> 00:17:24,793
♪ Lately ♪
441
00:17:24,793 --> 00:17:27,838
♪ Did you ever feel the pain ♪
442
00:17:27,838 --> 00:17:30,632
♪ In the morning rain ♪
443
00:17:30,632 --> 00:17:34,720
♪ As it soaks you to the bone? ♪
444
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:37,556
♪ Maybe I just wanna fly ♪
445
00:17:37,556 --> 00:17:40,184
♪ Wanna live,
I don't wanna die ♪
446
00:17:40,184 --> 00:17:43,020
♪ Maybe I just wanna breathe ♪
447
00:17:43,020 --> 00:17:46,064
♪ Maybe I just don't believe ♪
448
00:17:46,064 --> 00:17:48,734
♪ Maybe you're the same as me ♪
449
00:17:48,734 --> 00:17:51,570
♪ We see things
they'll never see ♪
450
00:17:51,570 --> 00:17:58,869
♪ You and I
are gonna live forever ♪
451
00:17:58,869 --> 00:18:01,622
♪ I said maybe ♪
452
00:18:01,622 --> 00:18:04,583
♪ I don't really wanna know ♪
453
00:18:04,583 --> 00:18:07,461
♪ How your garden grows ♪
454
00:18:07,461 --> 00:18:10,672
♪ 'Cause I just wanna fly ♪
455
00:18:10,672 --> 00:18:12,841
♪ Lately ♪
456
00:18:12,841 --> 00:18:15,844
♪ Did you ever feel the pain ♪
457
00:18:15,844 --> 00:18:18,472
♪ In the morning rain ♪
458
00:18:18,472 --> 00:18:22,810
♪ As it soaks you to the bone? ♪
459
00:18:22,810 --> 00:18:25,562
♪ Maybe I will never be ♪
460
00:18:25,562 --> 00:18:28,232
♪ All the things
that I wanna be ♪
461
00:18:28,232 --> 00:18:31,235
♪ Now is not the time to cry ♪
462
00:18:31,235 --> 00:18:33,946
♪ Now's the time
to find out why ♪
463
00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:36,657
♪ I think you're
the same as me ♪
464
00:18:36,657 --> 00:18:39,618
♪ We see things
they'll never see ♪
465
00:18:39,618 --> 00:18:44,873
♪ You and I
are gonna live forever ♪
466
00:18:44,873 --> 00:18:47,376
{\an8}♪
467
00:18:47,376 --> 00:18:49,503
♪ Maybe ♪
468
00:18:49,503 --> 00:18:52,673
♪ I don't really wanna know ♪
469
00:18:52,673 --> 00:18:55,384
♪ How your garden grows ♪
470
00:18:55,384 --> 00:18:58,720
♪ 'Cause I just wanna fly ♪
471
00:18:58,720 --> 00:19:00,389
♪ Lately ♪
472
00:19:00,389 --> 00:19:03,976
♪ Did you ever feel the pain ♪
473
00:19:03,976 --> 00:19:06,562
♪ In the morning rain ♪
474
00:19:06,562 --> 00:19:10,732
♪ As it soaks you to the bone? ♪
475
00:19:10,732 --> 00:19:13,527
♪ Maybe I just wanna fly ♪
476
00:19:13,527 --> 00:19:16,196
♪ Wanna live,
I don't wanna die ♪
477
00:19:16,196 --> 00:19:19,032
♪ Maybe I just wanna breathe ♪
478
00:19:19,032 --> 00:19:21,910
♪ Maybe I just don't believe ♪
479
00:19:21,910 --> 00:19:24,746
♪ Maybe you're the same as me ♪
480
00:19:24,746 --> 00:19:27,499
♪ We see things
they'll never see ♪
481
00:19:27,499 --> 00:19:34,423
♪ You and I are gonna
live forever ♪
482
00:19:34,423 --> 00:19:38,552
♪ Gonna live forever ♪
483
00:19:38,552 --> 00:19:40,596
[ Beeping ]
484
00:19:40,596 --> 00:19:45,267
[ Groans softly ]
485
00:19:45,267 --> 00:19:48,312
[ Flatline ]
486
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:54,109
[ Flatline stops ]
487
00:20:01,158 --> 00:20:02,284
Bon appétit.
488
00:20:02,284 --> 00:20:04,703
[ Gags ]
489
00:20:05,871 --> 00:20:07,706
[ All vomiting ]
490
00:20:12,419 --> 00:20:15,505
Well, fuck.
491
00:20:15,505 --> 00:20:18,425
I think I can speak
on behalf of my people--
492
00:20:18,425 --> 00:20:20,344
We've had
enough spaghetti.
493
00:20:20,344 --> 00:20:21,929
You did it,
didn't you?
494
00:20:21,929 --> 00:20:23,847
You couldn't change
everyone's taste buds
495
00:20:23,847 --> 00:20:25,807
but you could
make it...
496
00:20:25,807 --> 00:20:27,309
distasteful.
497
00:20:27,309 --> 00:20:28,560
It wasn't the death,
was it?
498
00:20:28,560 --> 00:20:30,187
It was the complexity
of life.
499
00:20:30,187 --> 00:20:31,480
God,
what was the point?
500
00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:32,856
If you're asking whether
this was a story
501
00:20:32,856 --> 00:20:35,609
about right and wrong,
the answer is
502
00:20:35,609 --> 00:20:36,818
I don't care.
503
00:20:36,818 --> 00:20:39,112
So what do we do?
Cells consume, Morty.
504
00:20:39,112 --> 00:20:41,740
Life itself is wrong,
and that means death is right.
505
00:20:41,740 --> 00:20:43,075
But you can't
side with that.
506
00:20:43,075 --> 00:20:46,286
So you live,
even when it means eating.
507
00:20:46,286 --> 00:20:49,164
And Fred here
really did it well.
508
00:20:49,164 --> 00:20:50,624
Mmm, mmm.
509
00:20:50,624 --> 00:20:52,334
[ Sighs ]
510
00:20:54,670 --> 00:20:57,089
The hell is this?
Where is the spaghetti?
511
00:20:57,089 --> 00:20:58,507
Why don't you go
fuck yourself, Summer?
512
00:20:58,507 --> 00:21:00,384
What?
What's wrong with
Salisbury steaks?
513
00:21:00,384 --> 00:21:03,512
At least try them.
Holy shit, this is...
514
00:21:03,512 --> 00:21:06,390
the best Salisbury steak
I've ever had.
515
00:21:06,390 --> 00:21:09,184
Mmm!
Is it actually
Salisbury steak?
516
00:21:09,184 --> 00:21:10,602
Do you want to know or not?
517
00:21:10,602 --> 00:21:12,104
Together: No, thanks!
518
00:21:12,104 --> 00:21:14,564
Just so you know,
it's really bad.
519
00:21:14,564 --> 00:21:15,816
Whatever you say!
520
00:21:15,816 --> 00:21:17,567
Seriously, haha,
I'm not kidding.
521
00:21:17,567 --> 00:21:19,903
I won't tell you but I need you
to know the truth is horrible
522
00:21:19,903 --> 00:21:22,864
so that if you ever find out on
accident, you can't blame me!
523
00:21:22,864 --> 00:21:24,741
Now that's a deal!
Yeah!
524
00:21:24,741 --> 00:21:26,535
Honestly, if you knew,
you might kill yourselves.
525
00:21:26,535 --> 00:21:27,703
That's the last thing
I'll say forever.
526
00:21:27,703 --> 00:21:30,872
Good!
[ Laughter ]
527
00:21:30,872 --> 00:22:07,826
{\an8}♪
528
00:22:07,826 --> 00:22:10,954
♪ Gonna live forever ♪
529
00:22:10,954 --> 00:22:16,126
[ Flatline ]
530
00:22:16,126 --> 00:22:19,713
That's where vacuum cleaner bags
come from?!
531
00:22:19,713 --> 00:22:21,256
Oh, my God.
532
00:22:21,256 --> 00:22:23,175
Vrrrrrr!
533
00:22:23,175 --> 00:22:24,593
Vrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
534
00:22:24,593 --> 00:22:26,970
Hgggggg-vvrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
535
00:22:28,430 --> 00:22:29,931
{\an8}Did you get any of that?