♪ Go! ♪
♪ T-E-E-N ♪
♪ T-I-T-A-N-S ♪
♪ Teen Titans, let's go ♪
♪ Teen Titans, go ♪
The clock is ticking, George.
Our pitch for the new Teen Titans is due in less than 24 hours.
What do we have so far?
The same thing we had five minutes ago, Marv.
Squat! Zip!
Zero!
- Well, it's a start. - Not really.
This assignment isn't easy.
The Teen Titans have been around in various forms since 1964.
Now we have to come up with a new idea to reinvent them,
and save DC Comics from certain financial doom!
No pressure.
We need a fresh take,
something that will breathe life into these characters.
Teen Titans. Teen Titans.
Teen Tit... I've got it.
Hit me with it.
What if they're super muscular...
super ripped,
super tight?
The Teen Tight-Hands!
Deep underground, in the cobble tunnel,
our superheroes get pumped.
Yeah, Tight-Hands!
Lookin' tight.
The tightness I am feeling is at maximum levels.
Yeah, Ravhand, flex that flexor.
Yeah, Cyhand, yeah!
Yeah, baby!
We're the tightest, hands down!
Yeah!
It's the emergency hand signal.
We must lend a helping hand.
Tight-Hands, to the Flying Valhands.
Yeah!
Meanwhile, at the Jump City bridge, panic is being wreaked
by the arch nemesis of the Teen Tight-Hands,
The Atomic Toe!
No, Mr. Frostbite.
No, no, no, The Clipper. Yeah!
Look, The Clipper and his army of Clippertrons
are clipping the cables to the Jump City bridge.
Ooh! You gotta hand it to him. That's pretty under-handed.
It's time to get a handle on the situation.
Tight-Hands, yeah!
Teen Tight-Hands? You'll never stop me.
Clippertrons, clip 'em!
Fist grip. Yeah!
The rock, the paper, the scissors.
Yeah!
Flick, flick, flick, flick. Yeah!
Supersonic snap.
Power punch. Yeah!
No!
You won't be slipping through my fingers this time.
Looks like we got the upper hand.
Tight-Hands, high-five!
Yeah!
That is literally the worst idea we've ever had.
It might actually be the worst idea anyone ever had.
It's all part of the creative process.
Gotta dig through the dirt to get to the gold.
But the Teen Titans have been around for two decades.
I feel like we're trying to reinvent the wheel here.
That's why we're here in our favorite diner taking a pitstop.
Hmm. Wheel.
Pitstop.
What is it, George? What have you got?
What if... the Teen Titans
are a superhero Formula One pit crew?
Faster than a speeding bullet
shot from a speeding car.
Pit Crew Titans, go, go, go!
We're the fastest pit crew in the sport of motors.
1.81 seconds, baby.
I'm getting a distress call.
Pit Crew Titans, go, go, go!
Meanwhile, in Jump City,
a crime is in progress at the National Bank.
Jack it up!
Hose 'em down.
Roll 'em out.
1.81 seconds, baby.
I'm getting another distress call.
Pit Crew Titans, go, go, go!
- Give me the bag, lady. - Help, help!
Jack it up.
- Wheels locked. - Helmet on.
Go, go, go!
1.81 seconds, baby.
It's Batman. He forgot his lunch.
Let's move.
- Bread. - Ham.
Cheese.
Veggies.
Spread.
Bread.
1.81 seconds, baby.
Go, go, go!
These ideas are the worst!
We still have time to come up with something,
but we're gonna have to pull an all-nighter.
Oh, I don't know if my body can handle it.
Don't be ridiculous, George. You've got a super body.
Thanks, Marv. Wait. That's it.
Super body. Come on, Marv, we gotta get back to work.
Everyone knows Superman is the most powerful superhero of all time, right?
Yeah, he's practically indestructible.
And we all know his body has incredible powers.
Yeah, the man is bullet-proof.
But no one ever talks about what's inside his body.
What if, inside the greatest superhero
lived the greatest team of superheroes?
Organs, status report.
Cylungs are steady, Starheart.
Adrenaraven gland on standby.
Oh, yeah!
Bladder Boy nearly full.
Robin the Appendix is functioning... I think.
Even as a super organ, Robin has no powers.
Incoming!
Minimal damage sustained.
That's super skin, yo.
Super Organs, activate.
Initiating acceleration of the heart rate.
Increasing oxygen intake. Breathe, baby, breathe!
Right in the appendix.
Bladder level's at full capacity.
We needs a potty break, yo.
Potty break? We can't take a potty break.
We're in the middle of a fight.
You're gonna have to hold it.
Holding. Holding.
We cannot take much more of this.
We need the extra rush of energy.
Got it. Triggering adrenal gland now.
All right!
- We love you, Superman. - You're the best.
Superman always gets all the credit.
I feel not like the heart, but like the liver that is chopped.
Maybe he needs to be reminded who's really in control.
Good idea. Bladder Boy, you may release.
Releasing the bladder!
We don't love you anymore, Superman.
You're the worst.
It's over, George. We've been up all night,
and we still don't have a fresh, viable take on the Titans.
Well, let me check my back pocket.
I always keep something in there.
- Eh? - Well, it'll have to do.
These new Teen Titans will probably only run for six issues anyway.
Let's go.
Pit Crew Titans? What were we thinking?
Pit Crew Titans, go, go, go!
- Nope. - Come on, get out of here.
Get. You're get.
Jeez, Louise!