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This programme contains strong
language and adult humour

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What are you doing here, Potter?

3
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Come here to surprise you
with something. What is that?

4
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Something to ask you. Oh, my GOD!
No-o-o! Are you excited? Yeah, I...

5
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Oh, my God!
SHE GASPS

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I've already had mine.

7
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Ahhh!

8
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Open the card first.

9
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"Bitch, you always knew."

10
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THEY LAUGH

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Aww!

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"To Ellie, I can't say 'I do'
without you.

13
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"Will you be my bridesmaid?
Love, Becky."

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Aww, of course I will!

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♪ In a perfect world... ♪

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Ahhh! Ha-ha-ha!

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BA Baracus. BA Baracus.
"I ain't getting on no plane, fool!"

18
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Right, no, lost me.

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Argh! Ooh!

20
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Who invented drones? They're nowt
but a frigging nuisance.

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THEY LAUGH

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What? Oh, dear! Oh, dear!

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I hate that as well.
Oh, I can't eat that.

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Oh! Oh!

25
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"Waa-waa-waa-waa-waa! Bof-bof!"

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Oh, here we go, Dave. Here we go.
Oh, look at Shirl.

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BOTH: Oh!

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No! I'm not a big fan of warm fruit,
apart from a cherry pie.

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Well, the randy old thing.

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Oh, yes!

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Hey, aren't they sexy
when they get annoyed?

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SHE IMITATES YAWNING

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SHE IMITATES YAWNING
Boring!

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HE LAUGHS
Oh, dear.

35
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SHE GASPS

36
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Well done!

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You've gotta have a punt,
haven't you? You've got to.

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You're not even
slightly competitive, are you?

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There's something wrong with me.

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In the week a Northamptonshire horse
was crowned tallest in the world,

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we enjoyed lots of great telly.

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Things got fiery
in the Dragons' Den...

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I disagree with Deborah.
I'm your perfect Dragon. Ooh!

44
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I've got more knowledge
in one finger on this

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than Deborah will ever have.

46
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And I have the audience,
and that's what you need.

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Purpose. We've got a showdown.

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Steven loves this. Oh, God, yeah.

49
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Cos they're all having a little
cat fight among theirselves.

50
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Well, he knows it's not for him,
doesn't he?

51
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Cos it's not social media
and suchlike. Yeah.

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AS STEVEN: "You know,

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AS STEVEN: "You know,
what are you doing on social media?"

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THEY LAUGH

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None of your bloody business.

56
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"Have you thought about
going viral?"

57
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LAUGHING: "Have you thought
about going viral?"!

58
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As though it's just an option!

59
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...Clarkson handed over the keys to
some fresh faces on Prime Video...

60
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There it is. Big day.

61
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It's a bit bigger
in real life, isn't it?

62
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I've been Diddly Squat Farm Shop.
Ooh, did you buy owt?

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No, didn't even go in.
Queue were too long.

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...and everything was going wrong
for Nigel on BBC News.

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We've got a screamer!

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BOOING

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Well, there's a saying
I've got for that.

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You know what it is, don't you?

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Boring! Boring! Boring!

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People don't say "Nigel Farridge"
when he's up north.

71
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So how come they can see "Farahge",
but they can't say "garahge". Yeah.

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Isn't that interesting? Not...

73
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It is usually momentous,
earth-shattering importance, Mary.

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In Hull...

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What do you mean, where am I?

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ON PHONE: I've seen your car
back here.

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You brought me!

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He's looking for me
cos my car's outside...

79
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He brought you here!
...and he brought me.

80
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...best friends Jenny and Lee.

81
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Oh, fricking hell. What an idiot.

82
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Oh, too right.
I'll agree with that.

83
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Oh, Ray. I'm sorry.
Oh, you're all right.

84
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I'm getting a lift back.

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I know. I've just realised.
Now I've...

86
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I saw the car
and I thought you went...

87
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I'm sure I saw somebody
go down the side of the chalet

88
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and I thought, "Well, what's she...?
Where's she going?"

89
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So I've been to everybody's chalet
looking for you.

90
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Oh! Oh, my God. Oh, see... God.
...that's how much you miss me.

91
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Doughnut. All right, then,
I'll get off. All right. Bye. Bye.

92
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Sorry. Sorry to bother you. Bye.

93
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I cannot believe that. I can't.

94
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On Saturday night,
we got our first glimpse

95
00:03:51,080 --> 00:03:54,359
of what Gary Lineker
had been up to on ITV.

96
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Yes, I've been looking forward
to this one.

97
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I like Gary Lineker and I like
the name of the programme.

98
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That's enough for me. Yes!
I know nothing about it,

99
00:04:01,520 --> 00:04:05,359
but I'm very excited
that you're very excited.

100
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I remember The Cube.

101
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Do you remember - they had to go in
and do stuff inside the Cube? Yes.

102
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But do they have to go inside a box
for The Box?

103
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But I think they're outside.

104
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Oh. So outside...
Thinking outside the box?

105
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No, I think they're in the box,
but outside, not in a studio.

106
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Oh, the box is outside? Yeah.

107
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What have I signed up for?

108
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"Ten celebrities"?
We'll be the judge.

109
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Argh! They're scared.

110
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Oh, is this about people smuggling?

111
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I'm in a state
of unparalleled uncertainty.

112
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Oh, blimey. Bercow's back.

113
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You know, when they're doing...
Order! Order! Order.

114
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The hardest thing about this

115
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is that you don't
actually get a set of instructions.

116
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Oh, my God. Where am I?

117
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Oh! Oh, crap.

118
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Oh, my God, Lee.
I'd be back in the box.

119
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This looks a bit like
that Korean thing, Nutty.

120
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What was it called? Skid Row.

121
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No. Squid Game.

122
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I just love
that they're calling it The Box -

123
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it's basically

124
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it's basically
a glorified filing cabinet!

125
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It looks
as if they're on a stage somewhere.

126
00:05:21,680 --> 00:05:22,839
Is that the premise -

127
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they're in a box,
they don't know where they are,

128
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they open it up and then there's
just a challenge ahead of them?

129
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Oh, who's this?

130
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Hello, everyone.

131
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Who is it? Who is it?

132
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Welcome to Butlin's!

133
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Butlin's?!

134
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That's like my worst nightmare.

135
00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:44,240
Oh, my God. They're at Butlin's.
Don't eat the food.

136
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If, at any point,
anybody is expecting me to sing...

137
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...they can forget it.

138
00:05:49,880 --> 00:05:50,959
Howay!

139
00:05:50,960 --> 00:05:52,399
...I can tell you now,

140
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I would sooner choose failure
than embarrass myself at that level.

141
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I'd step up if it were singing.

142
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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

143
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Grandad was a Redcoat at Butlin's.
Back in the day. Yeah.

144
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You're in for a real treat tonight.

145
00:06:05,520 --> 00:06:07,559
He invented Walkers, Abs.

146
00:06:07,560 --> 00:06:10,199
Gary Lineker?!
Yes. He's the crisp man.

147
00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:12,679
In just over an hour's time,

148
00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:18,199
our teams will be going head-to-head
in the ultimate battle of the bands!

149
00:06:18,200 --> 00:06:20,559
Well, we've got a member
of JLS here... Yeah, come on!

150
00:06:20,560 --> 00:06:23,039
...so I feel like somebody's got
a bit of a headstart.

151
00:06:23,040 --> 00:06:26,720
For this challenge only,
Joey's team is joined by...

152
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CHEERING

153
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BOTH: Who's that?

154
00:06:31,080 --> 00:06:32,639
Is that Peter Andre?!

155
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...Peter Andre!

156
00:06:34,120 --> 00:06:35,639
MUSIC: Mysterious Girl

157
00:06:35,640 --> 00:06:37,599
Christ, they're going to lose.

158
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I thought they were going to
get a singer. Oh!

159
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CHEERING

160
00:06:44,520 --> 00:06:48,399
♪ There ain't no reason you and me
should be alone tonight

161
00:06:48,400 --> 00:06:50,359
♪ Yeah, baby
Tonight, yeah... ♪

162
00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:51,479
Go on, JB!

163
00:06:51,480 --> 00:06:53,759
Edge Of Glory by Gaga. Yeah.

164
00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:56,719
♪ I'm on the edge of glory... ♪

165
00:06:56,720 --> 00:06:59,039
There's some tricky notes
to reach in here.

166
00:06:59,040 --> 00:07:00,559
♪ But I got a reason that you... ♪

167
00:07:00,560 --> 00:07:01,999
Sara's in her feelings here.

168
00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:04,599
She's thinking,
"Get me back in Dragons' Den." Yeah.

169
00:07:04,600 --> 00:07:05,999
Here we go. Oh, here we go.

170
00:07:06,000 --> 00:07:09,319
OFF-KEY: # I need a man that thinks
it's right when it's so wrong

171
00:07:09,320 --> 00:07:11,159
♪ Tonight, yeah, baby, tonight... ♪

172
00:07:11,160 --> 00:07:12,999
She had nothing to worry about.

173
00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:16,839
I love you, Sara, but you was right.
You was telling the truth.

174
00:07:16,840 --> 00:07:20,559
♪ It's hot to feel the rush

175
00:07:20,560 --> 00:07:24,159
♪ To brush the dangerous... ♪

176
00:07:24,160 --> 00:07:26,519
I don't know,
I think this needs a rescue.

177
00:07:26,520 --> 00:07:28,399
Can we get the actual singer
to sing?

178
00:07:28,400 --> 00:07:29,639
Where's Peter?!

179
00:07:29,640 --> 00:07:32,199
ALL: # I'm on the edge... ♪
We're up, we're up!

180
00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:34,639
♪ Of glory... ♪
Oh, we're up!

181
00:07:34,640 --> 00:07:36,119
Let's hear you sing!

182
00:07:36,120 --> 00:07:37,999
They've drowned out Peter Andre!

183
00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:39,599
THEY LAUGH

184
00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:42,759
Peter Andre's like,
"Shut up! Let me do this!"

185
00:07:42,760 --> 00:07:45,599
They look good, they sound shit.
I've never heard the song.

186
00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:50,679
OFF-KEY: # I'm in love
with you-ou-ou-ou! ♪

187
00:07:50,680 --> 00:07:51,759
Oh, Danny.

188
00:07:51,760 --> 00:07:54,439
Well, Peter just spent most of
his time stood behind somebody.

189
00:07:54,440 --> 00:07:57,239
So... mystery box - useless.

190
00:07:57,240 --> 00:07:57,279
MUSIC: So What

191
00:07:57,280 --> 00:07:59,079
MUSIC: So What
by Pink

192
00:07:59,080 --> 00:08:01,399
CHEERING

193
00:08:01,400 --> 00:08:02,879
They've thought about
how they're setting up.

194
00:08:02,880 --> 00:08:04,519
They've actually choreographed this.

195
00:08:04,520 --> 00:08:07,199
That is...
That is a classic ABBA stance.

196
00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:08,799
Can't go wrong.

197
00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:10,559
♪ Guess I just lost my husband

198
00:08:10,560 --> 00:08:13,799
♪ I don't know where he went... ♪

199
00:08:13,800 --> 00:08:15,439
Why is he...?!

200
00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:17,359
Oh, dear.
I've seen it all now, Mary.

201
00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:19,359
♪ So I'm going to drink my money

202
00:08:19,360 --> 00:08:20,999
♪ I'm not going to pay... ♪

203
00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:23,039
You know what this strikes me of?

204
00:08:23,040 --> 00:08:25,359
A middle-aged man
who's getting divorced

205
00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:26,399
and lost everything.

206
00:08:26,400 --> 00:08:31,639
LAUGHING: His wife's... His wife's
absolutely took him to the cleaners.

207
00:08:31,640 --> 00:08:33,959
"I'll show her!"

208
00:08:33,960 --> 00:08:36,999
♪ And guess what?
I'm having more fun

209
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:42,359
♪ And now that we're done
I'm going to show you tonight... ♪

210
00:08:42,360 --> 00:08:45,799
Go on, Ranvir!
She's going for it, is Ranvir.

211
00:08:45,800 --> 00:08:49,679
♪ You weren't there
You never were... ♪

212
00:08:49,680 --> 00:08:52,439
She's pretty good, by the way.
The Vixen can sing.

213
00:08:52,440 --> 00:08:55,879
Oh! She's got some pipes, innit?
Ohh! Yes!

214
00:08:55,880 --> 00:08:58,319
♪ You let me fall... ♪

215
00:08:58,320 --> 00:09:01,119
Come on, Butlin's!
CHEERING

216
00:09:01,120 --> 00:09:03,079
Yes!

217
00:09:03,080 --> 00:09:04,560
Whoo!

218
00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:08,199
Come on, John! Whoo!

219
00:09:08,200 --> 00:09:09,479
Oh, man. Anarchy!

220
00:09:09,480 --> 00:09:11,879
Order!

221
00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:13,359
Oh...

222
00:09:13,360 --> 00:09:16,399
Oh, he had to do it, didn't he?
He had to get it in.

223
00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:18,719
Just in case anybody
didn't know who he was.

224
00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:20,200
I can reveal...

225
00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:25,080
...the winning team...

226
00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:30,439
...is...? Oop...

227
00:09:30,440 --> 00:09:31,479
Come on, Lineker.

228
00:09:31,480 --> 00:09:32,559
...John's team.

229
00:09:32,560 --> 00:09:34,919
♪ We are the champions... ♪
CHEERING

230
00:09:34,920 --> 00:09:36,399
I knew it was
going to be John's team.

231
00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:40,479
How embarrassing
for Peter Andre and JB Gill.

232
00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:42,839
If they would have used
Peter Andre, Mysterious Girl,

233
00:09:42,840 --> 00:09:45,359
it would have been a wrap.
I'm not going to lie. Yeah.

234
00:09:45,360 --> 00:09:46,879
It would have been a wrap.

235
00:09:46,880 --> 00:09:49,239
As I said, as soon as they...
♪ Baby girl!

236
00:09:49,240 --> 00:09:50,599
♪ Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh

237
00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:52,880
♪ I said tonight
is your lucky night... ♪

238
00:09:54,120 --> 00:09:55,399
You see, the thing for me is

239
00:09:55,400 --> 00:09:57,399
when Ant & Dec's
Saturday Night Takeaway got killed,

240
00:09:57,400 --> 00:10:01,399
everybody thought, "What are we
going to do for Saturday night TV?

241
00:10:01,400 --> 00:10:02,759
"Is it going to die?"

242
00:10:02,760 --> 00:10:06,479
And I can safely say
that their concerns were right.

243
00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:10,039
THEY LAUGH

244
00:10:10,040 --> 00:10:11,240
Ah...

245
00:10:13,560 --> 00:10:15,039
In Leeds...

246
00:10:15,040 --> 00:10:17,399
Do you know what, Ellie?
Before I've come here today,

247
00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:20,999
I've had three coffees
and I'm absolutely off my tits.

248
00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:23,359
Inside of me now is vibrating.

249
00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:25,839
...sisters Ellie and Izzi.

250
00:10:25,840 --> 00:10:29,119
I had a coffee when I woke up,
and then I met Mam and our Siobhan,

251
00:10:29,120 --> 00:10:30,519
I bought myself a coffee,

252
00:10:30,520 --> 00:10:32,319
and then our Siobhan went,
"Do you want another one?"

253
00:10:32,320 --> 00:10:34,639
I went, "Oh, yeah, go on, then."
She got me a large.

254
00:10:34,640 --> 00:10:36,359
Them two were on the decaf.

255
00:10:36,360 --> 00:10:38,319
I'm there getting off my tits.

256
00:10:38,320 --> 00:10:41,399
I've had a toastie. I've had
half a sandwich. I've had crisps.

257
00:10:41,400 --> 00:10:44,239
I've had houmous.
Like, I don't... What will calm me?

258
00:10:44,240 --> 00:10:44,279
Yeah. How are you going to

259
00:10:44,280 --> 00:10:46,599
Yeah. How are you going to
come down from this caffeine high?

260
00:10:46,600 --> 00:10:48,319
I don't know. How long is this
going to last?

261
00:10:48,320 --> 00:10:50,279
{\an8}You're not going to be able
to sleep tonight.

262
00:10:50,280 --> 00:10:52,639
Well, I am worried that I'm not
going to be able to sleep tonight

263
00:10:52,640 --> 00:10:54,399
because I do struggle to sleep
as it is,

264
00:10:54,400 --> 00:10:57,359
never mind three coffees deep.
Three double shots.

265
00:10:57,360 --> 00:10:58,999
I'm off my nut.

266
00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:02,159
This week, there were some new
presenters behind the wheel

267
00:11:02,160 --> 00:11:03,519
on Prime Video.

268
00:11:03,520 --> 00:11:05,839
Vroom-vroom-vroom!

269
00:11:05,840 --> 00:11:08,679
It's back, Soph.
But the new version.

270
00:11:08,680 --> 00:11:10,560
The new version with the new three.

271
00:11:13,080 --> 00:11:14,839
The baton's been handed over now.

272
00:11:14,840 --> 00:11:18,399
Yeah. It's bigger than that, um...

273
00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:21,519
You know when Charles
got his crown on?

274
00:11:21,520 --> 00:11:24,039
Oh, the coronation -
knocks that into a cocked hat.

275
00:11:24,040 --> 00:11:26,440
SHE LAUGHS
This is bigger.

276
00:11:30,520 --> 00:11:34,119
"Mo-jave" Desert?
"Mo-harvey" Desert!

277
00:11:34,120 --> 00:11:36,039
HE TUTS
"Mo-jave"!

278
00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:37,400
Seriously?

279
00:11:40,760 --> 00:11:42,279
Christ. Ooh, look at them boys.

280
00:11:42,280 --> 00:11:44,599
What are those? Cars?

281
00:11:44,600 --> 00:11:47,319
Yellow one
is some super-limited low-run.

282
00:11:47,320 --> 00:11:48,759
I think it's a Hennessey.

283
00:11:48,760 --> 00:11:51,799
Like, two million worth of car.
Huh?! Yeah.

284
00:11:51,800 --> 00:11:53,399
What was the office saying?

285
00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:55,319
That we were going to go up
against some local firepower?

286
00:11:55,320 --> 00:11:56,799
What is the local firepower?

287
00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:58,679
Local firepower?
It's got to be something like

288
00:11:58,680 --> 00:12:00,519
an Apache helicopter,
summat like that, innit?

289
00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:01,999
Considering we're on a runway,

290
00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:04,839
you'd imagine it'd be something like
a top fuel drag...

291
00:12:04,840 --> 00:12:06,799
Oh, my God.
Oh!

292
00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:09,159
Shitting hell!
Jesus!

293
00:12:09,160 --> 00:12:11,440
The bloody dog shit himself then.
I know.

294
00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:16,160
There's the budget.
Yes, please! We've got a budget!

295
00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:20,559
We've got a budget
and we're not afraid to use it.

296
00:12:20,560 --> 00:12:23,799
Well, this is what
we'd be racing against...

297
00:12:23,800 --> 00:12:25,479
No way!
No.

298
00:12:25,480 --> 00:12:28,359
Not being funny,
but you can't race a plane.

299
00:12:28,360 --> 00:12:31,399
...a trio of L-39 Albatros jets.

300
00:12:31,400 --> 00:12:35,359
That's your sex, innit, really?
Well, that is yeah. Yeah.

301
00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:38,720
That is better than sex for you.
I'm getting aroused looking at this.

302
00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:43,919
Launch control activated.

303
00:12:43,920 --> 00:12:45,559
Oh, it's James going first.

304
00:12:45,560 --> 00:12:47,199
Oh, is it James?

305
00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:48,799
Are they doing, like, a relay race?

306
00:12:48,800 --> 00:12:51,159
Yeah. It's like pass the baton,
Simon.

307
00:12:51,160 --> 00:12:52,720
Go!

308
00:12:53,800 --> 00:12:54,919
Go!

309
00:12:54,920 --> 00:12:56,279
Oh, we're off!

310
00:12:56,280 --> 00:12:58,719
Initially, the cars
would have the advantage

311
00:12:58,720 --> 00:13:01,039
because they were much quicker
off the line.

312
00:13:01,040 --> 00:13:02,799
Car's off. Car is off.

313
00:13:02,800 --> 00:13:04,799
Car's beating... Well, I suppose
it would do, to begin with.

314
00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:06,240
Yeah, slow pull away from the plane.

315
00:13:07,560 --> 00:13:08,879
160.

316
00:13:08,880 --> 00:13:11,879
160?!
In a car?!

317
00:13:11,880 --> 00:13:15,200
It just gives me the willies.
Why would you want to go that fast?

318
00:13:16,400 --> 00:13:17,799
He's making the turn.

319
00:13:17,800 --> 00:13:19,239
Oh, he's coming off.
Look, the jet's up.

320
00:13:19,240 --> 00:13:19,279
You're going to see the plane

321
00:13:19,280 --> 00:13:22,399
You're going to see the plane
absolutely nail it in a sec.

322
00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:24,160
Gently on the power.

323
00:13:25,200 --> 00:13:27,880
Let's see how he handles the turn.
This turn is going to be insane.

324
00:13:32,200 --> 00:13:34,599
Oh!
But he's gone out, don't forget.

325
00:13:34,600 --> 00:13:36,880
The jet's got to come back in now.
Easy!

326
00:13:39,560 --> 00:13:42,199
Oh, he's getting on the straight.
Put your foot down!

327
00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:44,560
He's in the lead.
Jesus!

328
00:13:48,320 --> 00:13:51,719
Oh, it's tight.
Oh, look at that.

329
00:13:51,720 --> 00:13:54,039
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

330
00:13:54,040 --> 00:13:56,759
Oh!
That's so low!

331
00:13:56,760 --> 00:13:58,280
He's going to overtake him, Mary.

332
00:14:01,280 --> 00:14:03,119
Oh, he's overtaking him!

333
00:14:03,120 --> 00:14:04,879
Oh, my goodness.

334
00:14:04,880 --> 00:14:06,759
That's a bit hairy, isn't it?
Yeah.

335
00:14:06,760 --> 00:14:08,679
The jet's coming back first.

336
00:14:08,680 --> 00:14:11,159
Oh, yeah! The plane just edged it!

337
00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:15,600
Imagine even overtaking someone.
I've never even overtook a car.

338
00:14:17,080 --> 00:14:19,399
It was time to play our ace card.

339
00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:22,839
Oh! What's this, then? Francis.

340
00:14:22,840 --> 00:14:25,359
This is the Hennessey, bro.
This is the Hennessey, blood.

341
00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:27,719
I think this might have
more horsepower than the plane.

342
00:14:27,720 --> 00:14:31,240
No way. Yeah.
You're lying. No joke.

343
00:14:35,360 --> 00:14:38,319
Yes, Francis! Come on, Francis.
Give it some.

344
00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:40,760
That's like you're driving a rocket,
not a car.

345
00:14:43,040 --> 00:14:45,440
Come on, Francis!
Now we're off.

346
00:14:49,240 --> 00:14:52,199
No! It's off! It's off!

347
00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:54,759
Shitting hell!
You've got to take it over.

348
00:14:54,760 --> 00:14:55,960
He's got to.
Come on!

349
00:14:57,800 --> 00:14:59,119
I'm catching the jet.

350
00:14:59,120 --> 00:15:00,439
He is, look!

351
00:15:00,440 --> 00:15:02,000
Bloody hell! How fast is he going?

352
00:15:03,200 --> 00:15:05,199
180.

353
00:15:05,200 --> 00:15:07,719
Oh, my d... No!

354
00:15:07,720 --> 00:15:12,200
He's actually overtaking a jet
on a runway. How ridiculous.

355
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:15,080
I've got to try and catch him.

356
00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:18,199
On the power!

357
00:15:18,200 --> 00:15:20,599
Right, come on. Final straight,
floor it. Yeah, we're going.

358
00:15:20,600 --> 00:15:22,999
Oh, my... It's going to be close,
this, you know.

359
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:24,320
Where's the jet?!

360
00:15:25,640 --> 00:15:28,119
It's coming right behind you.
Is it on the line?

361
00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:31,079
Oh! I think he's going to do it.
He's going to be there.

362
00:15:31,080 --> 00:15:32,280
He's going to do it.

363
00:15:34,280 --> 00:15:35,840
201!

364
00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:38,879
No!

365
00:15:38,880 --> 00:15:40,199
Oh, no!

366
00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:42,160
Oh!
So close!

367
00:15:45,120 --> 00:15:48,079
Jet's done it.
Jet's done it. Wow!

368
00:15:48,080 --> 00:15:50,959
Look at that. I'll tell you what,
it was a close one.

369
00:15:50,960 --> 00:15:54,599
Oh! You did really well.
Oh, thanks.

370
00:15:54,600 --> 00:15:57,439
CROSSTALK

371
00:15:57,440 --> 00:16:00,519
Well, they're a nice bunch of lads,
aren't they, Nutty? Yeah.

372
00:16:00,520 --> 00:16:04,959
You see, like, Francis' car there,
that Hennessey, it's got...

373
00:16:04,960 --> 00:16:06,999
I think it's got a six litre engine
in it.

374
00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:10,279
You know, it's amazing.
Thousands of horsepower.

375
00:16:10,280 --> 00:16:14,039
However, that being said,

376
00:16:14,040 --> 00:16:19,559
can he play Rod Stewart on tape
like I can in me three-wheel van?

377
00:16:19,560 --> 00:16:22,679
Out of three speakers, not four.

378
00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:24,960
I think the answer's no.

379
00:16:33,680 --> 00:16:35,079
In Blackpool...

380
00:16:35,080 --> 00:16:37,039
You wouldn't believe it last night.

381
00:16:37,040 --> 00:16:39,479
What? Evie. She's got a thing
with locking doors at the moment.

382
00:16:39,480 --> 00:16:41,119
Oh, no.
Yes.

383
00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:43,959
...Pete and his little sister Sophie.

384
00:16:43,960 --> 00:16:46,959
She'd locked our bedroom door,
but she's on the other side.

385
00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:49,279
Me, Paige, and Jimmy
are on the other side.

386
00:16:49,280 --> 00:16:51,040
"We've got your toothbrushes here."

387
00:16:53,520 --> 00:16:56,039
Should post it under the door.
I've had to say to her,

388
00:16:56,040 --> 00:16:58,039
"Look, just keep turning it
that way,"

389
00:16:58,040 --> 00:17:01,039
because I can see through the hole
where the key's going. Yeah.

390
00:17:01,040 --> 00:17:03,039
"It's not turning!
It's not turning!"

391
00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:05,039
I'm like,
"You're not turning it hard enough.

392
00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:08,039
"Turn it, turn it."
After five minutes,

393
00:17:08,040 --> 00:17:11,799
eventually she managed to unlock it.
Oh!

394
00:17:11,800 --> 00:17:14,359
And I said, "What is the lesson
that we've learned here?"

395
00:17:14,360 --> 00:17:19,079
She went, "Turn the key
the right way," not lock the door.

396
00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:24,439
This week, a familiar face had found
a brand-new home on the internet.

397
00:17:24,440 --> 00:17:27,160
I watch about two hours of YouTube
a day, Mary.

398
00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:30,439
And look what's happened
as a result.

399
00:17:30,440 --> 00:17:33,599
I've become even more well-informed
than I was before.

400
00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:36,199
They do have some good documentaries
on there.

401
00:17:36,200 --> 00:17:40,639
They're not always factually
correct, but they are entertaining.

402
00:17:40,640 --> 00:17:43,039
Nicola watches this.
She absolutely loves it.

403
00:17:43,040 --> 00:17:44,959
Like, every time I go downstairs
at the minute,

404
00:17:44,960 --> 00:17:47,240
Nicola's watching Holly Willoughby
on YouTube. It's mad. Aye. Aye.

405
00:17:48,720 --> 00:17:51,319
Are we rolling?
Yeah.

406
00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:54,359
She's not taking herself too
seriously. She's having a laugh,

407
00:17:54,360 --> 00:17:57,319
sharing personal stories,
from what I've seen. Yep.

408
00:17:57,320 --> 00:17:59,639
Everyone, meet my friend Georgie.

409
00:17:59,640 --> 00:18:02,679
This is giving budget Meghan Markle,
and that's not a good place to be.

410
00:18:02,680 --> 00:18:03,999
Budget...!

411
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:06,399
We were talking about these moments
within the show

412
00:18:06,400 --> 00:18:09,039
where we were like,
"Everybody knows something."

413
00:18:09,040 --> 00:18:11,439
Yeah. "And we all have,
like, different skillsets..."

414
00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:13,079
Uh-huh.
LEE SIGHS

415
00:18:13,080 --> 00:18:15,799
...and we want to pull all of
these amazing skillsets...

416
00:18:15,800 --> 00:18:17,039
Yes.

417
00:18:17,040 --> 00:18:19,599
...and our little black book
of people that we know together.

418
00:18:19,600 --> 00:18:21,279
What are we learning about today?

419
00:18:21,280 --> 00:18:24,719
Well, Sally, who we're going to
introduce in a minute,

420
00:18:24,720 --> 00:18:26,759
she's a florist and she does...
Flower arranging.

421
00:18:26,760 --> 00:18:28,479
Oh, you'll like this.
I do actually like it.

422
00:18:28,480 --> 00:18:29,879
Yeah. You'll like this.

423
00:18:29,880 --> 00:18:32,439
I love flowers.
I love them around the house.

424
00:18:32,440 --> 00:18:34,039
They just cheer everything up,
I think. Yeah.

425
00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:36,839
Tell you what, I got a lovely
set of surprise flowers from Ben

426
00:18:36,840 --> 00:18:39,199
the other week.
Oh, lovely.

427
00:18:39,200 --> 00:18:41,039
Well, you want to be
soaking these things up,

428
00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:43,879
because when you do get married,
that stops.

429
00:18:43,880 --> 00:18:47,039
Sally comes into my house, and
she's got - no judgment on this -

430
00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:49,399
but what she will do is,
when I go to the loo,

431
00:18:49,400 --> 00:18:51,839
they'll all be cut and trimmed
and put in something different.

432
00:18:51,840 --> 00:18:55,839
How long is she in the loo for?
Quite a long time. Clearly.

433
00:18:55,840 --> 00:18:58,159
I think, if that was
a real television, Nutty,

434
00:18:58,160 --> 00:19:00,599
they would have edited that bit out,

435
00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:03,119
because we don't want to have
to think about her going to the loo.

436
00:19:03,120 --> 00:19:04,679
No.

437
00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:08,039
Not necessarily. I mean, you know,
it's a human function,

438
00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:10,359
but we don't want necessarily
to make a feature of it.

439
00:19:10,360 --> 00:19:12,759
Sally Parkes.

440
00:19:12,760 --> 00:19:15,119
Here we go.
OK. What have we got here?

441
00:19:15,120 --> 00:19:19,479
Hello! Can I hug you?
You're slightly...

442
00:19:19,480 --> 00:19:20,839
Bloody hell.

443
00:19:20,840 --> 00:19:22,759
Hi, guys.
Do you want to put stuff down?

444
00:19:22,760 --> 00:19:25,119
God, I thought she was
taking the rubbish out.

445
00:19:25,120 --> 00:19:27,679
Right, exactly...
Can I, like, unload you?

446
00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:29,559
Are you feeling creative
this afternoon?

447
00:19:29,560 --> 00:19:33,279
I'm not, no, but for
the purposes of YouTube, yes. Yes.

448
00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:37,199
So, Holly, you are going to,
from a simple broom handle,

449
00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:38,679
create something like this.

450
00:19:38,680 --> 00:19:42,159
Who among us hasn't got a simple
broom handle hanging around

451
00:19:42,160 --> 00:19:42,199
ready just to use as a prop...

452
00:19:42,200 --> 00:19:44,479
ready just to use as a prop...
Honestly...

453
00:19:44,480 --> 00:19:45,599
...for flower arrangement?

454
00:19:45,600 --> 00:19:48,439
Wrap that around there.
OK, I'm going to put my glasses on.

455
00:19:48,440 --> 00:19:50,799
Oh, readers are on now.
It's getting serious.

456
00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:53,719
I'll be freaked when I need readers
as well, because I need my glasses.

457
00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:56,079
You'll have to get
them flippers on them.

458
00:19:56,080 --> 00:19:58,039
Oh, no, I'm not having them.
They make you fall over.

459
00:19:58,040 --> 00:20:01,079
Auntie Margaret fell over
when she got her varifocals.

460
00:20:01,080 --> 00:20:02,679
Pull it really firmly.

461
00:20:02,680 --> 00:20:06,039
Now, if anyone's annoyed you today
or anything like that,

462
00:20:06,040 --> 00:20:09,039
this is a great way of getting out
the tension.

463
00:20:09,040 --> 00:20:13,439
Oh!
Not today necessarily.

464
00:20:13,440 --> 00:20:16,039
Or just, you know, in the past, maybe.

465
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:20,399
Sort of 12-18 months, two years,
anybody that's done your head in.

466
00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:21,919
HOLLY GRUNTS

467
00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:23,959
That's it. Let's do it.
Don't know who that was, but...

468
00:20:23,960 --> 00:20:26,959
His name rhymes with
Shmillip Shmofield.

469
00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:29,999
OK. That's it.
Now pull it really tight, Holly.

470
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:31,999
Christ, what a palaver, innit?

471
00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:34,439
Dad, would you make anything
like this?

472
00:20:34,440 --> 00:20:37,039
Not really. Now you're retired,
you can do this.

473
00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:39,959
You can follow
Holly Willoughby's channel.

474
00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:43,999
I'm just going to put that... there.

475
00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:45,719
SHAUN YAWNS

476
00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:48,839
Here's to floristry. Here's to
feeling very proud of ourselves.

477
00:20:48,840 --> 00:20:50,399
You should.
We've done very well.

478
00:20:50,400 --> 00:20:52,759
Yeah.
Together!

479
00:20:52,760 --> 00:20:55,119
I mean, to be fair, different
strokes for different folks.

480
00:20:55,120 --> 00:20:58,720
I like watching YouTube videos about
ferrets, you know what I mean?

481
00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:06,759
Come the festive season, me and you
are going to make a garland.

482
00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:10,759
Are we? A rigid garland
to go on our mantle.

483
00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:14,039
No. And when people come in,
we can say, "We made that."

484
00:21:14,040 --> 00:21:16,999
Oh, is it? And we can go like that,
Shirl - "Together."

485
00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:18,680
Together!

486
00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:22,559
In south-east London...

487
00:21:22,560 --> 00:21:26,479
You know I went out with Dean
Tuesday for a drink?

488
00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:28,999
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I had to stay out and pick you up,

489
00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:30,199
didn't I?

490
00:21:30,200 --> 00:21:31,359
...Sue and her husband Steve.

491
00:21:31,360 --> 00:21:36,199
I forgot to tell you that he...

492
00:21:36,200 --> 00:21:39,160
He asked me if it was all right...

493
00:21:41,240 --> 00:21:42,600
...to marry Leah.

494
00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:45,639
Oh, shut up!

495
00:21:45,640 --> 00:21:47,000
Don't lie.

496
00:21:48,800 --> 00:21:55,239
You're such a liar. No. No! Oh,
you wouldn't have forgotten that.

497
00:21:55,240 --> 00:21:59,040
Well, I was just thinking
of an opportunity to tell you.

498
00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:04,199
He wants to marry Leah?
Does she want to marry him?

499
00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:08,039
Yeah. She does? Yeah.
Our Leah wants to get married?

500
00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:09,280
Yeah.

501
00:22:11,320 --> 00:22:12,640
Oh, my God.

502
00:22:14,160 --> 00:22:15,679
On Thursday night,

503
00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:20,599
more enthusiastic entrepreneurs
were entering the Den on BBC One.

504
00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:23,279
Lee, them shorts are a bit short,
aren't they?

505
00:22:23,280 --> 00:22:24,719
Are they swimming trunks?

506
00:22:24,720 --> 00:22:27,759
You see, now,
I can relate to the dragons.

507
00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:31,319
You know, when I did my BTEC
in business,

508
00:22:31,320 --> 00:22:34,799
I was actually the MD
of the school business.

509
00:22:34,800 --> 00:22:37,399
Yeah. So I understand, you know,
people coming to you,

510
00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:40,039
problem-solving. You know,
"We've got a cupcake stall here,"

511
00:22:40,040 --> 00:22:43,079
"We've got no floats,"
that kind of stuff.

512
00:22:43,080 --> 00:22:45,840
Someone's nicked the floats.
Somebody had the floats away.

513
00:22:48,640 --> 00:22:50,880
She's one of my weird crushes.

514
00:22:54,880 --> 00:22:58,399
I don't know
where it comes from, but it's there.

515
00:22:58,400 --> 00:22:59,880
Wow.
Deborah Meaden.

516
00:23:02,120 --> 00:23:04,039
Hi, Dragons. My name's Sam,

517
00:23:04,040 --> 00:23:07,639
and I'm looking for £10,000
for 2% of my business Yes Friends.

518
00:23:07,640 --> 00:23:10,879
And we're on a mission
to make ethical clothing affordable

519
00:23:10,880 --> 00:23:12,799
and transform the fashion industry.

520
00:23:12,800 --> 00:23:15,999
Deborah's going to be all over this.
She loves a bit of ethical clothing.

521
00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:19,519
She does. She loves an ethical
brand. She does, does Deborah.

522
00:23:19,520 --> 00:23:21,839
So in 2021, we started Yes Friends.

523
00:23:21,840 --> 00:23:24,959
We started with a 7.99
sustainable and ethical T-shirt.

524
00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:28,999
Oh, that's not bad. 7.99. 7.99?
Yeah, that's dear, innit? Yeah.

525
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:31,919
In our first month,
we sold over 4,000 T-shirts.

526
00:23:31,920 --> 00:23:33,479
And so Yes Friends has begun.

527
00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:35,919
Look, they're all the colours you
wear, Steve.

528
00:23:35,920 --> 00:23:37,959
Blue, light blue, dark blue,

529
00:23:37,960 --> 00:23:41,159
greyish blue and white.
They're all your colours.

530
00:23:41,160 --> 00:23:41,199
Ethical doesn't need

531
00:23:41,200 --> 00:23:43,119
Ethical doesn't need
to be expensive.

532
00:23:43,120 --> 00:23:44,759
It just needs a bit of scale.

533
00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:45,839
SHE LAUGHS

534
00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:48,559
Isn't it funny how everyone wants
to be ethical these days?

535
00:23:48,560 --> 00:23:51,679
Ah. So you've just got to
sell 5 million? Yeah!

536
00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:54,679
We've received over
700 five-star reviews

537
00:23:54,680 --> 00:23:57,679
and we've enabled customers
to tip garment workers directly.

538
00:23:57,680 --> 00:24:00,039
Well, you could just tip the person
that made your T-shirt?

539
00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:02,439
That is... Effectively, yeah,
that's what he's doing. What?!

540
00:24:02,440 --> 00:24:04,359
That's crazy. Like, in a good way.

541
00:24:04,360 --> 00:24:05,679
Hi. Hi, Deborah.

542
00:24:05,680 --> 00:24:07,159
Lots of words I like here.

543
00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:08,519
Oh, Deborah's loving it.

544
00:24:08,520 --> 00:24:09,959
He's speaking Deborah's language.

545
00:24:09,960 --> 00:24:13,799
Well, she's into all that, love.
She's a vegan, isn't she?

546
00:24:13,800 --> 00:24:15,399
She don't eat...

547
00:24:15,400 --> 00:24:17,959
No. She's into all this.
I know, aye.

548
00:24:17,960 --> 00:24:20,479
Sam. Hi, Touker.

549
00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:24,399
There's a difference between
what you want and reality.

550
00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:26,719
There he is - the reality check.

551
00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:29,679
Touker's into making money,
isn't he? Yeah.

552
00:24:29,680 --> 00:24:31,519
He's not into this ethics malarkey.
No.

553
00:24:31,520 --> 00:24:34,919
Are you taking the full capacity
of the factory? Of the factory?

554
00:24:34,920 --> 00:24:37,199
Uh, no, we're not. You're not.

555
00:24:37,200 --> 00:24:39,239
Oh, here we go - stick the boot in.

556
00:24:39,240 --> 00:24:42,119
This is all just a bloody dream.
Your head's full of magic, son.

557
00:24:42,120 --> 00:24:47,119
Would the factory owner
not see you as a liability?

558
00:24:47,120 --> 00:24:49,719
Oh, right. He has to bring it
down, doesn't he?

559
00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:53,239
To say you pay my workers more
for the bit I do for you,

560
00:24:53,240 --> 00:24:55,599
which is only 5% of my production.
Yeah.

561
00:24:55,600 --> 00:24:58,039
The other 95%,
I can't afford to pay them.

562
00:24:58,040 --> 00:24:59,959
Did you understand that?
No, I didn't get that, no.

563
00:24:59,960 --> 00:25:01,879
I didn't understand what he was
saying. I don't understand that.

564
00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:05,559
My eyes just went really, really
nearly closed listening to Touker.

565
00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:08,519
You're not going to have any power
over that factory

566
00:25:08,520 --> 00:25:10,119
till you control the whole factory.

567
00:25:10,120 --> 00:25:13,839
That's why he needs your money,
Touga. Touker.

568
00:25:13,840 --> 00:25:16,599
I am absolutely your perfect dragon.

569
00:25:16,600 --> 00:25:19,839
Oh. Stop playing hard to get,
Deborah.

570
00:25:19,840 --> 00:25:22,279
The minute there were a whiff
of sustainable fashion,

571
00:25:22,280 --> 00:25:24,639
I thought Deborah's going to be
all over that.

572
00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:25,919
Do you know what else I'm going to
do?

573
00:25:25,920 --> 00:25:27,919
What? What's she going to do?

574
00:25:27,920 --> 00:25:29,759
I'm going to offer you £20,000

575
00:25:29,760 --> 00:25:32,199
for 2% of the business.

576
00:25:32,200 --> 00:25:33,519
Wow.

577
00:25:33,520 --> 00:25:35,879
Bloody hell!
You never hear this!

578
00:25:35,880 --> 00:25:38,639
She's class. I know
why you fancy her now.

579
00:25:38,640 --> 00:25:40,559
I get it.

580
00:25:40,560 --> 00:25:42,919
I knew you would.
I knew you'd come round.

581
00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:45,279
I disagree with Deborah.
I'm your perfect Dragon.

582
00:25:45,280 --> 00:25:46,759
GASPS
What?!

583
00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:48,519
He's got back in, he's got jealous!

584
00:25:48,520 --> 00:25:50,839
I've got more knowledge on one
finger on this

585
00:25:50,840 --> 00:25:52,279
than Deborah will ever have.

586
00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:54,079
Let's go, Touker! Meow!

587
00:25:54,080 --> 00:25:57,999
No! We don't want you and your
negativity around here, Touker.

588
00:25:58,000 --> 00:25:59,639
You pooh-poohed it.

589
00:25:59,640 --> 00:26:01,959
It needs a lot of work, you know.

590
00:26:01,960 --> 00:26:04,519
Two words - mass production. What
you've got to do is

591
00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:06,760
stack it high and sell it cheap.

592
00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:11,239
Cut all this
sustainable nonsense out.

593
00:26:11,240 --> 00:26:14,199
What do you want? Have you ever
heard of nylon, my friend. Yeah.

594
00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:16,959
I would give you...

595
00:26:16,960 --> 00:26:18,319
...30,000.

596
00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:19,479
Oh, he's upped it!

597
00:26:19,480 --> 00:26:20,639
OK, for what?

598
00:26:20,640 --> 00:26:22,039
For 25%.

599
00:26:22,040 --> 00:26:23,439
THEY GROAN

600
00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:24,919
Oh, bollocks.

601
00:26:24,920 --> 00:26:27,999
Thank you so, so much
for your offers.

602
00:26:28,000 --> 00:26:31,159
Go with Deborah. Go on.
Deborah is your woman.

603
00:26:31,160 --> 00:26:31,199
Deborah,

604
00:26:31,200 --> 00:26:33,479
Deborah,
I'd love to accept your offer.

605
00:26:33,480 --> 00:26:34,639
To be fair, you'd be mad not to.

606
00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:36,519
Yeah! Yes! Good.

607
00:26:36,520 --> 00:26:39,439
Be nice to wear organic pants,
wouldn't it?

608
00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:42,279
I don't like the word pants,
Mary - can you stop using it?

609
00:26:42,280 --> 00:26:44,159
I don't like the word sweater.

610
00:26:44,160 --> 00:26:44,199
I don't like the word

611
00:26:44,200 --> 00:26:47,639
I don't like the word
knickers very much. Sweatshirts,

612
00:26:47,640 --> 00:26:52,239
I wouldn't use,
sweaters, pants, knickers.

613
00:26:52,240 --> 00:26:53,719
Can you think of anything else?

614
00:26:53,720 --> 00:26:56,079
{\an8}What's the other thing
that girls wear?

615
00:26:56,080 --> 00:26:59,519
Boob tubes. Boob tube is a terrible
expression. Yeah.

616
00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:01,880
There's a whole lot of words
that need changing.

617
00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:12,239
In Bristol...

618
00:27:12,240 --> 00:27:14,759
We got a wedding in a week. Mm-hm.
So what's the wedding etiquette

619
00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:16,759
for wearing suits, then?
Whatever you want.

620
00:27:16,760 --> 00:27:18,759
As long as it's not white.

621
00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:21,159
...brothers Tremaine, Twaine and
Tristan.

622
00:27:21,160 --> 00:27:22,839
I think white's all right, man.

623
00:27:22,840 --> 00:27:25,199
What, white trousers and all?
BOTH: Yeah.

624
00:27:25,200 --> 00:27:26,959
Wear all white, man.

625
00:27:26,960 --> 00:27:30,319
Nah. There's a time and a place. If
you're not on a yacht, then, no.

626
00:27:30,320 --> 00:27:31,920
Well, in a yardie dance.

627
00:27:33,560 --> 00:27:35,280
What are you, a plantation owner?

628
00:27:38,120 --> 00:27:40,999
Mmm. Yeah. Yeah.

629
00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:43,439
You work for KFC?

630
00:27:43,440 --> 00:27:45,039
Colonel.

631
00:27:45,040 --> 00:27:46,519
Oh, man.

632
00:27:46,520 --> 00:27:51,560
On Friday, Nigel was back
in the headlines on BBC News.

633
00:27:52,600 --> 00:27:55,479
No wonder you're tired. It's almost
your bedtime, kid. It's 10pm news

634
00:27:55,480 --> 00:27:57,039
and then bed, all right?

635
00:27:57,040 --> 00:28:01,399
Izzi, This tea is clap cold.

636
00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:03,719
Well, you should have drank it
when I made it.

637
00:28:03,720 --> 00:28:06,039
You've just made me a cold tea.

638
00:28:06,040 --> 00:28:08,359
How is that possible
when you boil the kettle?

639
00:28:08,360 --> 00:28:10,359
You make cold teas.

640
00:28:10,360 --> 00:28:12,679
Now the leader of Reform UK,
Nigel Farage...

641
00:28:12,680 --> 00:28:13,839
Ugh.

642
00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:15,599
Oh. What's he been up to now?

643
00:28:15,600 --> 00:28:17,559
{\an8}He's been defending
his party over allegations

644
00:28:17,560 --> 00:28:21,119
{\an8}officials may have broken
laws on political donations.

645
00:28:21,120 --> 00:28:23,519
What grounds could they
possibly have

646
00:28:23,520 --> 00:28:28,559
to suspect that Mr Farage and his
party might want to bend,

647
00:28:28,560 --> 00:28:30,599
merely bend the rules? Mm-hm.

648
00:28:30,600 --> 00:28:33,599
He dismissed
as loose pub talk suggestions Reform

649
00:28:33,600 --> 00:28:36,559
had accepted disguised
foreign donations...

650
00:28:36,560 --> 00:28:38,599
He is the king of loose pub talk.

651
00:28:38,600 --> 00:28:40,599
He's always in the pub anyway.
Yeah, yeah.

652
00:28:40,600 --> 00:28:42,599
...allegations he said
that were simply not true.

653
00:28:42,600 --> 00:28:45,599
Never let the truth get in the way
of power is the problem, isn't it?

654
00:28:45,600 --> 00:28:49,039
I say a lot of things when I've
had beer that are not true, Nutty.

655
00:28:49,040 --> 00:28:50,759
I know, you just... Do you remember
that time I said

656
00:28:50,760 --> 00:28:53,040
that more and more pensioners
were falling into wheelie bins?

657
00:28:54,600 --> 00:28:57,599
Two senior officials from the party
have now stepped down

658
00:28:57,600 --> 00:28:59,399
pending an internal
investigation.

659
00:28:59,400 --> 00:29:02,560
Well, you normally step
down when you've done nothing wrong.

660
00:29:06,840 --> 00:29:07,879
Oh.

661
00:29:07,880 --> 00:29:10,239
That's dodgy, innit? That's bang
to rights.

662
00:29:10,240 --> 00:29:13,119
Oh, so somebody donates
and they do it through his son

663
00:29:13,120 --> 00:29:17,519
that is a British citizen,
so that's how they get around it.

664
00:29:17,520 --> 00:29:21,479
You heard there from Dan Jukes, at
Nigel Farage's side for years,

665
00:29:21,480 --> 00:29:24,439
suggesting a way
to get around electoral law

666
00:29:24,440 --> 00:29:26,079
to get a foreign donation.

667
00:29:26,080 --> 00:29:26,119
Oh, look, why is he in colour and

668
00:29:26,120 --> 00:29:29,159
Oh, look, why is he in colour and
the rest are in black and white,

669
00:29:29,160 --> 00:29:31,559
Nutty? It's really helpful
for us to concentrate.

670
00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:33,559
I wish more programmes did this.

671
00:29:33,560 --> 00:29:35,239
Yeah. It's an absolute godsend.

672
00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:37,279
We could really follow programmes
more easily

673
00:29:37,280 --> 00:29:39,919
if they always had the speaker
in flesh colour.

674
00:29:39,920 --> 00:29:43,559
And, it appeared, claiming
they did it already.

675
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:46,239
So he's saying they've done it
before, they can do it again.

676
00:29:46,240 --> 00:29:49,679
Dan Jukes denies any wrongdoing
but has stood down.

677
00:29:49,680 --> 00:29:52,159
Oh, that's the classic isn't it?
Yeah.

678
00:29:52,160 --> 00:29:56,560
I haven't done anything wrong,
but I'll stand down just in case.

679
00:29:57,600 --> 00:30:00,599
The man
who usually shoots from the hip

680
00:30:00,600 --> 00:30:02,919
careful in his choice
of words today.

681
00:30:02,920 --> 00:30:04,159
Let me be clear.

682
00:30:04,160 --> 00:30:07,239
Let me just be clear from this piece
of paper that's been written for me.

683
00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:09,679
The party has done nothing wrong.

684
00:30:09,680 --> 00:30:13,559
What is more problematic
is loose pub talk.

685
00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:15,599
But the fact that you've got people

686
00:30:15,600 --> 00:30:18,679
so high up in your party
that are possible of loose pub talk

687
00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:21,159
says to me
that you've got the wrong people

688
00:30:21,160 --> 00:30:22,599
at the top in your party.

689
00:30:22,600 --> 00:30:24,599
Oh, my goodness, if you heard

690
00:30:24,600 --> 00:30:27,159
what I said in that garden at the
Golden Swan, Nutty.

691
00:30:27,160 --> 00:30:28,959
When? Every time I go there.

692
00:30:28,960 --> 00:30:31,239
Well, you're not to go again.

693
00:30:31,240 --> 00:30:33,719
...including a couple of boasts...

694
00:30:33,720 --> 00:30:36,039
You know,
and he is now going to go with

695
00:30:36,040 --> 00:30:38,319
a campaign to stop the boasts,

696
00:30:38,320 --> 00:30:40,599
as well as the boats.

697
00:30:40,600 --> 00:30:43,199
...that simply were not true.

698
00:30:43,200 --> 00:30:46,599
Well, he should know - he was there.

699
00:30:46,600 --> 00:30:51,399
We need a government that actually
delivers on its promises.

700
00:30:51,400 --> 00:30:53,680
Well, where are you going to find
one of them?

701
00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:58,599
And I am determined to lead Reform

702
00:30:58,600 --> 00:31:00,959
to victory at
the next general election.

703
00:31:00,960 --> 00:31:02,119
That is my job.
CHEERING

704
00:31:02,120 --> 00:31:04,479
I don't think for a minute
he wants to be Prime Minister.

705
00:31:04,480 --> 00:31:06,799
What, because it's an actual job?
Because it's a job, he'd have to

706
00:31:06,800 --> 00:31:08,079
turn up. He'd have to do things.

707
00:31:08,080 --> 00:31:08,119
I think he just likes

708
00:31:08,120 --> 00:31:10,039
I think he just likes
playing this full pantomime.

709
00:31:10,040 --> 00:31:11,999
He's a formidable opponent, Nutty.

710
00:31:12,000 --> 00:31:15,519
Well, I can tell you he has had
the stuffing knocked out of him.

711
00:31:15,520 --> 00:31:17,439
Yeah. Because when I saw him at

712
00:31:17,440 --> 00:31:21,839
the Parliamentarian of
The Year Award luncheon-dinner,

713
00:31:21,840 --> 00:31:23,879
he was like
really kind of like this.

714
00:31:23,880 --> 00:31:28,239
You know, we're doing
so much better than the rest of you.

715
00:31:28,240 --> 00:31:29,880
He's eaten humble pie.

716
00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:33,319
In Leeds...

717
00:31:33,320 --> 00:31:39,039
Other day, ice cream van comes down
the street, Nat brings the cash.

718
00:31:39,040 --> 00:31:41,959
He only brings a tenner
getting three ice creams -

719
00:31:41,960 --> 00:31:46,599
three standard ice creams,
no Flakes.

720
00:31:46,600 --> 00:31:50,559
The ice cream man says, "That's £12,
please."

721
00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:51,919
...sisters Ellie and Izzi.

722
00:31:51,920 --> 00:31:54,479
Four quid ago. Four quid ago.

723
00:31:54,480 --> 00:31:55,999
And had only brought a tenner out

724
00:31:56,000 --> 00:31:58,359
and he were going, "I'm not going
back in the house.

725
00:31:58,360 --> 00:32:00,679
"I'm not paying that.
I'm not paying those prices."

726
00:32:00,680 --> 00:32:02,079
Nat needs to get in real world.

727
00:32:02,080 --> 00:32:02,119
Yeah. OK, so now I'm telling Ezra,

728
00:32:02,120 --> 00:32:05,679
Yeah. OK, so now I'm telling Ezra,
when the ice cream van comes past

729
00:32:05,680 --> 00:32:09,560
that when he's playing the tune,
that means he's no ice creams left.

730
00:32:11,200 --> 00:32:15,199
Get some choc ices in freezer -
that's the next step for you, Karen.

731
00:32:15,200 --> 00:32:18,319
This week, our favourite
foul-mouthed chef

732
00:32:18,320 --> 00:32:21,159
was at another
dodgy diner on E4.

733
00:32:21,160 --> 00:32:23,479
I would proudly say Gordon Ramsay

734
00:32:23,480 --> 00:32:26,559
is one of my favourite people on
this earth.

735
00:32:26,560 --> 00:32:28,879
Really? Yes, he is.

736
00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:32,079
What a guy.
What a lovely man.

737
00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:32,119
What do you like about him

738
00:32:32,120 --> 00:32:34,399
What do you like about him
so much? Everything.

739
00:32:34,400 --> 00:32:36,719
I'm in Cortland, Ohio, a small city

740
00:32:36,720 --> 00:32:40,599
60 miles south of Cleveland,
home of the 4 Star Diner,

741
00:32:40,600 --> 00:32:42,439
one of the few establishments in
town...

742
00:32:42,440 --> 00:32:44,119
I mean, four-star diner -

743
00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:46,999
it's not really setting you up
for a five-star experience, is it?

744
00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:49,319
...run by Gus and his wife Avgi.

745
00:32:49,320 --> 00:32:51,560
Gus. Oh. Hello, Gus.

746
00:32:54,040 --> 00:32:57,039
Um, Gus. Gus. Gus. Gus.
Let me tell you about Gus.

747
00:32:57,040 --> 00:32:58,639
Oh, so no-one likes Gus.

748
00:32:58,640 --> 00:32:59,999
Now, I'm not an expert,

749
00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:02,319
but I think Gus might be a big
problem here.

750
00:33:02,320 --> 00:33:03,560
What's given you that idea?

751
00:33:06,240 --> 00:33:09,559
Gordon and Gus. It's a showdown.
It's the battle of the Gs.

752
00:33:09,560 --> 00:33:11,319
It's the battle of the Gs.

753
00:33:11,320 --> 00:33:14,959
In the programme, Gordon ordered
some delicacies from the menu.

754
00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:16,519
Lexy. OK.

755
00:33:16,520 --> 00:33:18,760
It's Gordon Ramsay's food, OK?

756
00:33:19,800 --> 00:33:22,719
Do you hear me? Yeah. No grease,
no stuff, no nothing.

757
00:33:22,720 --> 00:33:24,479
No grease, no slop, no nothing?

758
00:33:24,480 --> 00:33:26,839
Is he regularly serving
grease and slop?

759
00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:28,479
That's how you should be running
your business.

760
00:33:28,480 --> 00:33:30,839
You know, you get a
high-profile celebrity in...

761
00:33:30,840 --> 00:33:33,719
Make sure they get the better food.
It's bang-on. Yeah.

762
00:33:33,720 --> 00:33:35,599
Do it all fresh for him.

763
00:33:35,600 --> 00:33:37,559
Everybody else, straight
out the freezer.

764
00:33:37,560 --> 00:33:39,599
So this is the burger.

765
00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:42,119
This smells a little bit weird.

766
00:33:42,120 --> 00:33:43,199
It smells weird?

767
00:33:43,200 --> 00:33:44,799
What does it smell of?

768
00:33:44,800 --> 00:33:48,359
Is everything here fresh? Is it,
do they cook fresh?

769
00:33:48,360 --> 00:33:49,439
Yeah.

770
00:33:49,440 --> 00:33:51,319
They didn't seem too convincing.

771
00:33:51,320 --> 00:33:53,639
There was a bit of a pause there,
Julie. Yeah.

772
00:33:53,640 --> 00:33:54,759
"Yeah."

773
00:33:54,760 --> 00:33:55,879
Let's get the entire team out.

774
00:33:55,880 --> 00:33:57,319
Everybody out front.

775
00:33:57,320 --> 00:34:00,519
Oh, here we go. Yeah.
Let's have a little team talk.

776
00:34:00,520 --> 00:34:01,919
What is really going on?

777
00:34:01,920 --> 00:34:03,879
We're flying by the seats
of our pants every day.

778
00:34:03,880 --> 00:34:06,919
Gus does tell us to say that
the food is fresh and not frozen.

779
00:34:06,920 --> 00:34:08,119
Yeah.

780
00:34:08,120 --> 00:34:09,239
THEY GASP

781
00:34:09,240 --> 00:34:10,519
Oh, so it's a pack of lies.

782
00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:12,200
I must admit, Lee, I would as well.

783
00:34:13,920 --> 00:34:15,720
Everything good?

784
00:34:17,840 --> 00:34:20,599
THEY GROAN
Oh, my... What is that?

785
00:34:20,600 --> 00:34:23,559
Oh, not being funny, they're
serving... slop in strange ways.

786
00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:25,599
That is horrendous.

787
00:34:25,600 --> 00:34:29,399
What even is that? Chunk of car tyre
and a bit of mash and gravy.

788
00:34:29,400 --> 00:34:32,199
Gus, when was the last
time this kitchen was deep cleaned?

789
00:34:32,200 --> 00:34:34,559
Oh, don't ask that question.
Every single night.

790
00:34:34,560 --> 00:34:36,119
Every single night?

791
00:34:36,120 --> 00:34:38,079
Every single night?!

792
00:34:38,080 --> 00:34:38,119
That's a lie. Gus doesn't even look

793
00:34:38,120 --> 00:34:40,039
That's a lie. Gus doesn't even look
like

794
00:34:40,040 --> 00:34:41,600
he's had a deep clean in a while.

795
00:34:45,160 --> 00:34:46,999
Oh!

796
00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:49,839
Oh! Every night. Every night.

797
00:34:49,840 --> 00:34:51,479
Look at that.

798
00:34:51,480 --> 00:34:54,799
Raw meat sat with cooked meat.

799
00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:56,839
BOTH: Oh!

800
00:34:56,840 --> 00:34:58,759
Look, there's the burgers.

801
00:34:58,760 --> 00:35:01,199
Oh, I can't. It just makes me
never want to eat out again.

802
00:35:01,200 --> 00:35:03,079
That's it - stop cooking.
Done.

803
00:35:03,080 --> 00:35:03,119
"Stop cooking" -

804
00:35:03,120 --> 00:35:04,799
"Stop cooking" -
he's pulled the plug.

805
00:35:04,800 --> 00:35:07,199
Ladies and gentlemen,
I need to stop you from eating.

806
00:35:07,200 --> 00:35:09,799
Oh, he's doing it
in front of everybody! No!

807
00:35:09,800 --> 00:35:11,080
Just smell them.

808
00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:14,119
That's not fresh.

809
00:35:14,120 --> 00:35:16,039
That's not fresh.
"Have a whiff of that."

810
00:35:16,040 --> 00:35:18,679
Oh, my God, they're even letting
the customers smell it.

811
00:35:18,680 --> 00:35:20,399
Forget about that shit
and throw it away.

812
00:35:20,400 --> 00:35:21,519
What did you just say?

813
00:35:21,520 --> 00:35:23,519
Forget about that shit?
Throw it away.

814
00:35:23,520 --> 00:35:24,799
Throw it away!

815
00:35:24,800 --> 00:35:27,959
Well, you were fucking
serving it up five minutes ago.

816
00:35:27,960 --> 00:35:30,279
Now he's got the shakes, you go,
"Throw it away!"

817
00:35:30,280 --> 00:35:32,520
What is wrong with you?

818
00:35:33,360 --> 00:35:34,599
Like about what?

819
00:35:34,600 --> 00:35:36,039
"About what?"!

820
00:35:36,040 --> 00:35:38,320
It's a face-off now, Lee,
a face-off.

821
00:35:40,560 --> 00:35:42,159
Ohh!

822
00:35:42,160 --> 00:35:45,599
Full David Brent mode
on the backwards chair.

823
00:35:45,600 --> 00:35:47,919
The only way I'd consider staying

824
00:35:47,920 --> 00:35:51,519
is if you get in every member
of your staff and apologise to them.

825
00:35:51,520 --> 00:35:53,799
GILES LAUGHS

826
00:35:53,800 --> 00:35:55,319
To start.

827
00:35:55,320 --> 00:35:57,920
I mean, you had to do that
for your team, didn't you?

828
00:35:59,320 --> 00:36:02,960
If you're not going to do that,
then I can't help you. I'm leaving.

829
00:36:06,560 --> 00:36:09,000
Come on, Gus. You're gonna have to
step up, man.

830
00:36:11,560 --> 00:36:13,999
I quite fancy Gordon
in this episode. Do you know what?

831
00:36:14,000 --> 00:36:15,759
There's something about

832
00:36:15,760 --> 00:36:18,879
an angry, powerful man. Mm.
Do you know what I mean?

833
00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:21,199
It's a red flag.
It's massive red flag.

834
00:36:21,200 --> 00:36:23,519
But, God, he looks sexy today.

835
00:36:23,520 --> 00:36:24,919
It's them tight trousers
have got you,

836
00:36:24,920 --> 00:36:26,320
ain't they? It's the tight trousers.

837
00:36:30,640 --> 00:36:33,279
What, that's the producer?
Oh, I've never seen the producer

838
00:36:33,280 --> 00:36:34,599
get involved, have you? No!

839
00:36:34,600 --> 00:36:37,359
He came in here one day.

840
00:36:37,360 --> 00:36:38,919
How can you fucking judge me...?

841
00:36:38,920 --> 00:36:40,159
Ey-up, look.

842
00:36:40,160 --> 00:36:42,719
He's having a right paddy, isn't he?

843
00:36:42,720 --> 00:36:45,119
Fuck you!
INDISTINCT

844
00:36:45,120 --> 00:36:46,519
Oh! Oh!

845
00:36:46,520 --> 00:36:48,359
Oh, no. Oh, no, he's got a temper.

846
00:36:48,360 --> 00:36:50,800
He's got a temper on him, Nutty.
Yeah.

847
00:36:52,840 --> 00:36:55,159
Oh, he's put his blazer on
and he's gone.

848
00:36:55,160 --> 00:36:57,479
So Gordon's left, Gus has left.

849
00:36:57,480 --> 00:36:59,079
So...

850
00:36:59,080 --> 00:37:00,559
What's going on?

851
00:37:00,560 --> 00:37:02,440
Well, who's gonna lock up?
He's got the keys.

852
00:37:10,840 --> 00:37:12,199
In Wiltshire...

853
00:37:12,200 --> 00:37:14,039
Giles, I found your phone.

854
00:37:14,040 --> 00:37:17,079
And now I'm going to teach you
how to make a call.

855
00:37:17,080 --> 00:37:20,439
OK, see if you can find a way
of doing that yourself.

856
00:37:20,440 --> 00:37:22,479
...Giles and his wife Mary.

857
00:37:22,480 --> 00:37:24,839
Well done, Tubbs!
OK, you answer it, Nutty.

858
00:37:24,840 --> 00:37:27,159
Why? Well, pretend
it's a real conversation.

859
00:37:27,160 --> 00:37:28,359
PHONE RINGS

860
00:37:28,360 --> 00:37:30,679
Hello? Hello?
PHONE ECHOES

861
00:37:30,680 --> 00:37:31,879
Hello?

862
00:37:31,880 --> 00:37:34,759
Hello, Giles. Hello, Mary.

863
00:37:34,760 --> 00:37:39,439
That's weird. Your voice
comes a few minutes after...

864
00:37:39,440 --> 00:37:42,559
Well, that's because...
That's because I'm in Korea.

865
00:37:42,560 --> 00:37:44,879
OK, I'm going to hang up now.
Whis is where they make these.

866
00:37:44,880 --> 00:37:47,799
They make these in Korea, Nutty.

867
00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:51,559
That's it. So I'm in a simulated
reality in Korea.

868
00:37:51,560 --> 00:37:54,879
So you can actually make a call to
me on WhatsApp... I can now, yeah.

869
00:37:54,880 --> 00:37:57,480
...not on ordinary.
Isn't that marvellous? Yeah.

870
00:37:59,720 --> 00:38:01,039
In Newcastle...

871
00:38:01,040 --> 00:38:04,079
So you know that I've like painted
the garage a little bit

872
00:38:04,080 --> 00:38:05,879
and splattered some paint on it

873
00:38:05,880 --> 00:38:09,439
and put some sofas in, a couple
of sofas? Yes. Right? Yes, yes.

874
00:38:09,440 --> 00:38:13,799
But then somebody went into it
and they called it a man cave. Oh.

875
00:38:13,800 --> 00:38:16,079
...brothers Mark and Steve.

876
00:38:16,080 --> 00:38:17,919
Girls are allowed there too!

877
00:38:17,920 --> 00:38:19,919
And I think that my taste

878
00:38:19,920 --> 00:38:23,240
in interior garage decor
is actually quite fabulous.

879
00:38:24,480 --> 00:38:26,759
But then call it a woman cave...

880
00:38:26,760 --> 00:38:28,159
Yeah. It just doesn't... Yeah.

881
00:38:28,160 --> 00:38:29,919
THEY LAUGH

882
00:38:29,920 --> 00:38:33,840
Yeah, that brings all... Yeah, just
all kinds of wrong, isn't it? Yeah!

883
00:38:35,560 --> 00:38:38,120
"Nicola, I'm just gonna hang out
in the woman cave."

884
00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:40,840
"No, you're not."

885
00:38:42,120 --> 00:38:44,400
Been married 20 years.
Them days are finished.

886
00:38:46,680 --> 00:38:49,999
This week, an adrenaline-fuelled
romp with a Wonder Woman

887
00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:52,679
hit our screens on Prime Video.

888
00:38:52,680 --> 00:38:56,159
This is Gal Gadot's new film,
you know. Is it?

889
00:38:56,160 --> 00:38:59,239
New to me. I've never heard of him.
Who is it?

890
00:38:59,240 --> 00:39:02,439
Oh, do you want to look at
Gal Gadot? Come on, then.

891
00:39:02,440 --> 00:39:04,840
He wants to look at Gal Gadot,
Nutty.

892
00:39:06,120 --> 00:39:07,480
You're getting good at that.

893
00:39:09,040 --> 00:39:11,439
I've got a very big day
in court today.

894
00:39:11,440 --> 00:39:13,399
Ooh! Must be a lawyer.

895
00:39:13,400 --> 00:39:15,280
Do you reckon? She's in court today.

896
00:39:18,280 --> 00:39:20,559
Come on, get yourself ready.

897
00:39:20,560 --> 00:39:22,039
Look. How did that happen?

898
00:39:22,040 --> 00:39:24,359
That's so weird.
Someone's hacked it.

899
00:39:24,360 --> 00:39:26,359
Oh, yeah?

900
00:39:26,360 --> 00:39:27,519
Did you see that?

901
00:39:27,520 --> 00:39:30,000
She didn't see that happen,
did she? No.

902
00:39:33,120 --> 00:39:35,599
I nearly did the school run
in activewear this morning,

903
00:39:35,600 --> 00:39:38,040
but I thought, "Who are you kidding?
Just get dressed."

904
00:39:39,320 --> 00:39:41,239
Mwah. I'm proud of you.

905
00:39:41,240 --> 00:39:44,079
And don't forget to check
your glucose numbers.

906
00:39:44,080 --> 00:39:47,919
This is not an actual representation

907
00:39:47,920 --> 00:39:51,399
of how a school drop-off goes. Yeah.

908
00:39:51,400 --> 00:39:53,799
"What do you mean you've forgotten
your fucking PE kit?"

909
00:39:53,800 --> 00:39:55,599
"You dickhead!"

910
00:39:55,600 --> 00:39:57,439
MUSIC: Heart of Glass
by Blondie

911
00:39:57,440 --> 00:39:59,039
Oh, here we go.

912
00:39:59,040 --> 00:40:01,280
Yeah. Hot girl run! Let's go.

913
00:40:04,480 --> 00:40:07,679
THEY MIMIC SONG

914
00:40:07,680 --> 00:40:10,839
♪ Soon turned out
had a heart of glass... ♪

915
00:40:10,840 --> 00:40:13,799
90 minutes of watching Gal Gadot
running.

916
00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:16,040
This could go either way for me.

917
00:40:19,960 --> 00:40:22,039
PHONE RINGS

918
00:40:22,040 --> 00:40:24,639
Noah's calling. Oh. Ringing already?
Why's he calling her already?

919
00:40:24,640 --> 00:40:26,679
OK. What did we forget this time?

920
00:40:26,680 --> 00:40:28,439
MAN: I haven't forgotten a thing,
Maya.

921
00:40:28,440 --> 00:40:30,999
THEY GASP
That's not Noah. No.

922
00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:31,039
Who is this?

923
00:40:31,040 --> 00:40:33,320
Who is this?
Why are you on my son's phone?

924
00:40:35,560 --> 00:40:37,039
Because I have your son.

925
00:40:37,040 --> 00:40:38,119
What?

926
00:40:38,120 --> 00:40:39,839
No!

927
00:40:39,840 --> 00:40:42,399
Oh, my God,
that'd be the worst thing to hear.

928
00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:46,759
That... My daughter, yes,
you can have her. She's a nightmare.

929
00:40:46,760 --> 00:40:48,159
I don't mean that.

930
00:40:48,160 --> 00:40:51,199
You follow my rules,
and Noah lives.

931
00:40:51,200 --> 00:40:54,399
Disobey, he dies.

932
00:40:54,400 --> 00:40:56,119
OK, it's that straightforward.
Wow.

933
00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:58,679
That's not what you want to hear.
Just follow the bloody rules, bro.

934
00:40:58,680 --> 00:41:01,879
Your star witness, Mr Radian Tafa,

935
00:41:01,880 --> 00:41:04,959
is under heavy protection
at the Excelsis Hotel.

936
00:41:04,960 --> 00:41:07,319
Today is trial day.

937
00:41:07,320 --> 00:41:10,479
At 10.15, he's going to be
transported to the Old Bailey

938
00:41:10,480 --> 00:41:13,279
to stand witness
against my employer.

939
00:41:13,280 --> 00:41:16,439
So she's a lawyer, and she's
obviously going after someone.

940
00:41:16,440 --> 00:41:18,759
And now she's being...

941
00:41:18,760 --> 00:41:21,119
...blackmailed into
dropping the case

942
00:41:21,120 --> 00:41:23,479
or making things go away.
That's right.

943
00:41:23,480 --> 00:41:27,439
But that won't happen,
because you're gonna kill him first.

944
00:41:27,440 --> 00:41:29,359
Oh, God. Oh, my God.

945
00:41:29,360 --> 00:41:30,839
I'd do it, I'd do it.

946
00:41:30,840 --> 00:41:33,199
If this were me on the end
of the phone, I'd say,

947
00:41:33,200 --> 00:41:34,639
"I think you've got
the wrong person here

948
00:41:34,640 --> 00:41:37,079
"because I'm not going to be
physically able to do that."

949
00:41:37,080 --> 00:41:38,879
From where you're standing,

950
00:41:38,880 --> 00:41:41,399
it's just over five miles
to the Excelsis Hotel.

951
00:41:41,400 --> 00:41:44,439
Five miles? Jump on a Lime bike,
for God's sake.

952
00:41:44,440 --> 00:41:47,359
Surely Lime it up. Or an Uber,
something like that.

953
00:41:47,360 --> 00:41:50,759
At your pace, you can cover that
in under an hour.

954
00:41:50,760 --> 00:41:52,319
You want me to run?

955
00:41:52,320 --> 00:41:53,559
Noah would be long gone

956
00:41:53,560 --> 00:41:56,119
if they wanted us to run five mile
in under an hour.

957
00:41:56,120 --> 00:41:58,840
How long would it take you
to run five miles? Er...

958
00:42:00,520 --> 00:42:03,119
40 minutes. Oh, yeah.
They should give you the job.

959
00:42:03,120 --> 00:42:05,999
You'd get there quicker.
Actually, who would you...

960
00:42:06,000 --> 00:42:06,039
Who would you run faster for?

961
00:42:06,040 --> 00:42:08,319
Who would you run faster for?
Me or Jake?

962
00:42:08,320 --> 00:42:10,239
THEY LAUGH

963
00:42:10,240 --> 00:42:13,039
After running halfway
across London,

964
00:42:13,040 --> 00:42:16,320
Maya had a brainwave
to take the load off.

965
00:42:19,480 --> 00:42:21,839
Oh, she's going on the underground, look.

966
00:42:21,840 --> 00:42:23,079
He's not going to be happy
with that.

967
00:42:23,080 --> 00:42:24,680
He wants to be able to track her
the whole way.

968
00:42:28,400 --> 00:42:29,519
OK.

969
00:42:29,520 --> 00:42:31,319
Oh, he looks shady, Lee. Oh, no.

970
00:42:31,320 --> 00:42:33,319
What's going to happen to her now?
Oh, God.

971
00:42:33,320 --> 00:42:35,599
MONITOR BLEEPS

972
00:42:35,600 --> 00:42:37,080
You're not running, are you?

973
00:42:38,400 --> 00:42:39,919
I am.

974
00:42:39,920 --> 00:42:41,639
Are you on a train? What?

975
00:42:41,640 --> 00:42:42,799
What did he just do there?

976
00:42:42,800 --> 00:42:45,439
What is that that they took
off of her? That was her phone.

977
00:42:45,440 --> 00:42:47,759
Hello? Connection lost.

978
00:42:47,760 --> 00:42:48,960
She's lost the signal
on her headset.

979
00:42:50,520 --> 00:42:51,799
GASPS

980
00:42:51,800 --> 00:42:53,279
Quick, get back on!

981
00:42:53,280 --> 00:42:54,799
No!

982
00:42:54,800 --> 00:42:56,519
No, no, no!

983
00:42:56,520 --> 00:43:00,079
Oh, God.
This film is very manipulative

984
00:43:00,080 --> 00:43:02,919
because I want to kill
about six people already. Yes.

985
00:43:02,920 --> 00:43:04,639
I need my phone!

986
00:43:04,640 --> 00:43:06,399
No. No.

987
00:43:06,400 --> 00:43:08,239
Absolutely screwed.

988
00:43:08,240 --> 00:43:09,800
What does she do from here?

989
00:43:11,920 --> 00:43:14,200
Don't tell me she's going to race
that tube.

990
00:43:17,240 --> 00:43:20,719
No way.
She's going to run through London

991
00:43:20,720 --> 00:43:22,439
to beat a train.

992
00:43:22,440 --> 00:43:25,399
MUSIC: Running by Fat Dog

993
00:43:25,400 --> 00:43:27,200
She's chasing the tube!

994
00:43:29,800 --> 00:43:32,080
Ridiculous.
Oh, my God.

995
00:43:35,280 --> 00:43:36,560
This is the best part of the movie.

996
00:43:37,640 --> 00:43:39,960
Amira, this is not a rave.

997
00:43:42,360 --> 00:43:44,040
Get on the train!
Get on the train!

998
00:43:46,280 --> 00:43:47,359
She's actually made it.

999
00:43:47,360 --> 00:43:48,839
And the guys have got off.

1000
00:43:48,840 --> 00:43:50,319
THEY LAUGH

1001
00:43:50,320 --> 00:43:52,560
SHE PANTS

1002
00:43:56,000 --> 00:43:57,080
"Right."

1003
00:44:00,760 --> 00:44:02,119
"Fucking phone, now."

1004
00:44:02,120 --> 00:44:03,639
Yeah, go on.
Yeah, you little sniv.

1005
00:44:03,640 --> 00:44:05,999
Smack him right in the face.
Yeah! You snivelling twat!

1006
00:44:06,000 --> 00:44:07,799
Give me my phone.

1007
00:44:07,800 --> 00:44:09,479
Just give her the phone back.
Look at her.

1008
00:44:09,480 --> 00:44:12,119
Give it to me now. Eh...

1009
00:44:12,120 --> 00:44:13,879
Oh, he's being a smart-arse.

1010
00:44:13,880 --> 00:44:16,199
I'd punch him straight
in his stupid beard.

1011
00:44:16,200 --> 00:44:18,079
MOCKERY CONTINUES

1012
00:44:18,080 --> 00:44:20,360
BOTH: Oh, she's got a gun.
Oh!

1013
00:44:22,360 --> 00:44:24,879
Go on!
She's pistol-whipped him.

1014
00:44:24,880 --> 00:44:27,999
Pistol-whipped him.
"This might jog your memory, son."

1015
00:44:28,000 --> 00:44:30,439
Oh, she's got a gun. What the hell?

1016
00:44:30,440 --> 00:44:32,319
You're not laughing now, are you?

1017
00:44:32,320 --> 00:44:34,279
If you see it, say it, sorted.
Sorted.

1018
00:44:34,280 --> 00:44:36,879
What is it? See it, say it...
Sorted. See it, say it, sorted.

1019
00:44:36,880 --> 00:44:40,399
AGITATED CONVERSATION

1020
00:44:40,400 --> 00:44:41,519
Oh! Police.

1021
00:44:41,520 --> 00:44:42,800
Oh, no.

1022
00:44:44,280 --> 00:44:46,719
She's got a freaking gun, man.
You OK?

1023
00:44:46,720 --> 00:44:49,000
She was just getting her phone back, policeman.

1024
00:44:50,920 --> 00:44:52,319
She's cornered!

1025
00:44:52,320 --> 00:44:53,839
Pull the emergency brake.

1026
00:44:53,840 --> 00:44:55,599
Oh! The emergency brake?

1027
00:44:55,600 --> 00:44:56,760
Everyone's gonna fall over.

1028
00:44:58,160 --> 00:44:59,640
Oh, look, she's holding on.
What's she doing?

1029
00:45:02,120 --> 00:45:04,799
Police officer, you're the one
who requested the emergency brake

1030
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:06,079
and you fall over, you idiot!

1031
00:45:06,080 --> 00:45:08,359
Don't go in there! Stop!

1032
00:45:08,360 --> 00:45:09,919
"Don't go in there!"

1033
00:45:09,920 --> 00:45:12,239
Oh, because that wouldn't be locked
as well. How did she get in there?

1034
00:45:12,240 --> 00:45:13,240
Open up!

1035
00:45:14,600 --> 00:45:16,879
She's not gonna run down the tracks.

1036
00:45:16,880 --> 00:45:19,199
No. Surely not.

1037
00:45:19,200 --> 00:45:22,119
Open this door! Open this door now!

1038
00:45:22,120 --> 00:45:23,879
That's illegal.

1039
00:45:23,880 --> 00:45:26,239
She's gonna get a hefty fine
for that.

1040
00:45:26,240 --> 00:45:28,720
She'll be fine.
She's trying to save her son.

1041
00:45:32,240 --> 00:45:34,879
It got better and better, didn't it,
Mary? It was amazing.

1042
00:45:34,880 --> 00:45:36,839
You know, if it were me
in this situation,

1043
00:45:36,840 --> 00:45:38,879
say with me and Jimmy,
I'd be saying,

1044
00:45:38,880 --> 00:45:40,879
"Look, you've got
the wrong person here, buddy.

1045
00:45:40,880 --> 00:45:42,839
"I can't run anywhere.
Struggle running a bath."

1046
00:45:42,840 --> 00:45:45,599
Yeah. You know, I can drive. Yes.

1047
00:45:45,600 --> 00:45:48,119
Can I...? Is there a vehicle option?
Yeah.

1048
00:45:48,120 --> 00:45:50,439
To kill him, like, no problem.
You know, I'll do it.

1049
00:45:50,440 --> 00:45:52,999
However, there is a small caveat.

1050
00:45:53,000 --> 00:45:53,039
Who is gonna cover the costs

1051
00:45:53,040 --> 00:45:56,879
Who is gonna cover the costs
of the congestion charge and ULEZ?

1052
00:45:56,880 --> 00:45:58,840
Because I'm
in a noncompliant vehicle.

1053
00:46:00,320 --> 00:46:10,879
♪ In a perfect world

1054
00:46:10,880 --> 00:46:15,359
♪ Singing out

1055
00:46:15,360 --> 00:46:23,719
♪ In a perfect world

1056
00:46:23,720 --> 00:46:26,639
♪ In a perfect

1057
00:46:26,640 --> 00:46:29,079
♪ Perfect world. ♪

1058
00:46:29,080 --> 00:46:31,360
Subtitles by
Red Bee Media