PREVIOUSLY ON "THE HAVES AND THE HAVE NOTS"...
DARCI ASKS ABOUT YOU ALL THE TIME.
I'M GONNA ASK HER TO STOP OVER HERE FOR DINNER AFTER CHURCH.
STOP HITTING ME! PLEASE!
Shh!
PLEASE! STOP IT!
MY FAMILY CANNOT KNOW THIS.
HOW HAVE YOU BEEN GETTING TO THE DOCTOR?
I'VE BEEN DRIVING MYSELF.
THAT CHEMO MAKES YOU SICK.
YOU CAN'T BE DOING THAT.
WHAT CHOICE DO I HAVE? WELL, YOU GOT ME.
IT'S NOT DIRTY MONEY. IT'S THE MONEY THAT SHE OWED YOU.
NOW YOUR HOUSE IS PAID.
YOU ASKED FOR IT. I DID.
Veronica: HE BOUGHT HER A CAR. [ CAMERA SHUTTER SNAPS ]
I'M GOING TO PAY THE LITTLE BITCH A VISIT.
[ CAR HORN HONKS ]
I NEED YOU TO GET A COPY OF THIS OUT TO EVERYBODY INVOLVED,
AND, UH, BUT WE'RE GONNA ‐‐ WE'RE GONNA...DO IT LATER.
HOW DID YOU GET IN MY OFFICE?
YOU HAVE TO BE A LITTLE MORE CAREFUL
WHERE YOU LEAVE YOUR KEY.
I GAVE YOU YOUR MONEY, I GAVE YOU YOUR CAR,
NOW I NEED YOU TO GET OUT OF MY OFFICE.
[ SIGHS ] I HAVE ANOTHER REQUEST.
NO, NO, NO. I'M NOT PLAYING THIS GAME.
YOU ALREADY BLACKMAILED ME ONCE.
DON'T YOU WANT TO HEAR MY REQUEST?
NO. I DON'T. GET OUT!
I LOVE WHEN YOU TRY TO GET ANGRY.
TRY?! MM‐HMM.
YOU WANT TO SEE ANGRY?
STILL BE IN THIS OFFICE 60 SECONDS FROM NOW.
YOU'LL SEE PLENTY OF ANGRY. LEAVE!
JIM.
CANDACE, I JUST WALKED THROUGH THAT DOOR
WITH MY COURT REPORTER.
IT COULD HAVE BEEN ANYBODY.
COULD HAVE BEEN ONE OF MY COLLEAGUES ‐‐ ANYBODY!
YOU NEED TO LEAVE, AND YOU NEED TO DO IT NOW!
JIMMY.
YOU ‐‐ YOU THINK I'M KIDDING?
[ CHUCKLES ]
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? CALL THE POLICE?
OKAY.
YOU ENJOY MAKING ME MISERABLE.
YOU ARE NOT MISERABLE.
YOU'RE INTRIGUED.
YOU DISGUST ME.
CAN YOU TRY AND BE A LITTLE MORE CONVINCING NEXT TIME?
CANDACE...GET OUT!
I HAVE A REQUEST.
[ Sighing ] OH, CANDACE...
I HAVE A REQUEST.
WHAT IS IT?
WELL...
I AND MY BODY...
ARE REQUESTING THAT YOU DO THE THING YOU LOVE MOST.
NO, NO, NO, NO. MM‐HMM.
NO, THIS IS NOT ‐‐ THIS IS NOT HAPPENING HERE.
YOU NEED ‐‐ YOU NEED TO ZIP THIS BACK UP.
YOU'VE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE. YOU CAN'T BE HERE. NO.
BUT THIS IS YOUR ROBE.
I KNOW. I ‐‐
NO. YOU'RE OUT.
TAKE IT OFF AND PUT YOUR CLOTHES ON AND LEAVE.
OKAY.
ARE WE GONNA DO THIS EVERY TIME?
YOU PRETEND THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO,
AND THEN I HAVE TO SEDUCE YOU WHEN I KNOW YOU WANT TO
BECAUSE I CAN SEE IT FROM HERE.
SO COME ON.
I LOOKED THROUGH YOUR PLANNER,
AND I KNOW YOU HAVE A SCHEDULE TO KEEP.
NO...NO, NO. THIS IS NOT HAPPENING HERE.
NO? NO, WE'LL GO ‐‐
IT'S NOT? I ‐‐ I.
[ GRUNTS ]
IS IT?
[ PANTING ]
GOOD MORNING.
SOMEBODY SENDING YOU FLOWERS?
I FOUND THEM AT THE GROCERY STORE.
AREN'T THEY BEAUTIFUL?
THEY LOOK CHEAP.
THEY WERE NOT.
HOW MUCH DID YOU PAY FOR THEM?
DON'T WORRY ABOUT THAT.
THEY SMELL GREAT, AND IT'S THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTS.
YOU NEED A MAN TO BUY YOU FLOWERS.
NO, I DON'T NEED A MAN TO GET ME FLOWERS.
YES, YOU DO.
WHY ARE YOU SO CONCERNED ABOUT MY LOVE LIFE ALL OF A SUDDEN?
I'M JUST WONDERING WHY YOU FEEL THE NEED
TO BUY YOURSELF YOUR OWN FLOWERS, THAT'S ALL.
THEY'RE NOT FOR ME.
OH. SO THEN WHO ARE THEY FOR?
THEY'RE FOR KATHERYN.
KATHERYN?
WHY WOULD YOU BE GIVING HER FLOWERS?
I JUST THOUGHT IT WOULD BE NICE.
SHE'S NOT GONNA LIKE THOSE.
COME ON, HANNA.
SHE'S GOT A FLORIST, A ROSE GARDEN ‐‐
WHY WOULD SHE WANT $1.99, CHEAPY FLOWERS?
YOU HAVE CHANGED ON ME, CELINE.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
YOU'VE CHANGED.
IN THE BEGINNING, YOU WERE ALL SMILES AND EVERYTHING,
AND NOW I COME IN HERE
AND SOMETIMES YOU'RE NOT EVEN SMILING AT ALL.
WHAT IS IT?
WHY DID YOU SHINE JIM'S SHOES?
OH, HONEY. THEY WERE DIRTY.
I SHINE HIS SHOES.
AND YOU WERE COOKING.
LOOK, WHEN IT COMES TO JIM AND HIS CLOSET AND HIS THINGS,
YOU DON'T NEED TO BE NEAR ANY OF HIS PERSONAL THINGS,
YOU GOT IT?
WELL, I THOUGHT WE WERE IN THIS TOGETHER.
NO, WE ARE NOT.
CELINE.
YOU NEED TO GET SOMETHING VERY CLEAR.
WE HAVE VERY DEFINED ROLES HERE.
I HANDLE ALL OF JIM'S THINGS ‐‐
HIS CLOSET, HIS BATHROOM, HIS PERSONAL THINGS.
I DO THAT, HANNA, NOT YOU.
MM?
OKAY.
I'M SORRY. WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN.
GOOD.
THAT ALL THAT'S BOTHERING YOU?
NO, AS A MATTER OF FACT.
SINCE YOU ASK ‐‐
WHY DO YOU FEEL THE NEED TO STAY LATE ALL THE TIME?
[ CHUCKLES ] WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
[ Singsong voice ] HANNA, DON'T PLAY STUPID WITH ME.
YOU'VE STAYED LATE THREE NIGHTS THIS WEEK.
SHE ASKED ME TO.
WHY?
'CAUSE SHE HAD THINGS SHE NEEDED ME TO DO.
NO. NO, NO, HANNA. NO.
YOU LEAVE WHEN I LEAVE.
OH, GIRL, YOU ARE CRAZY. NO, I AM NOT CRAZY.
I LEAVE AT 5:00, SO MISS HANNA NEEDS TO
GET HER LITTLE BUTT OUT OF HERE AT 5:00.
THAT'S HOW IT WORKS.
WHY EXACTLY? BECAUSE...
BECAUSE I DON'T WANT YOU TO TALK TO HER ABOUT ME BEHIND MY BACK.
OH, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
NO.
HANNA, HER OLD MAID ‐‐
THAT'S ALL SHE DID, TALK ABOUT ME BEHIND MY BACK.
I HAVEN'T TALKED TO HER ABOUT YOU!
GOOD.
DON'T...EVER.
YOU KNOW WHAT? OKAY. I MUST BE MISSING SOMETHING.
NO, YOU'RE NOT.
YOU'RE NOT MISSING ANYTHING.
THIS IS WHAT YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND ‐‐
I HAVE A JOB HERE, TOO,
AND I DON'T NEED YOU
TO COME IN HERE TRYING TO MAKE IT...AWFUL FOR ME,
TRYING TO MAKE ME LOOK BAD, OKAY?
I'M NOT ‐‐ I'M NOT TRYING TO MAKE YOU LOOK BAD.
IF I DO SOMETHING TO HELP YOU, IT MAKES ALL OF US LOOK GOOD.
NO, I DON'T ‐‐
YOU JUST ‐‐ I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP, HANNA,
ESPECIALLY WHEN IT COMES TO JIM.
OKAY. I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S BEEN GOING ON WITH YOU LATELY.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
YOU HAVE BEEN ACTING LIKE SUCH A CRAZY PERSON AND A SOUR PUSS.
WHAT IS WRONG?
I WAS GONNA ASK YOU THE SAME THING, TOO.
YOU'RE ACTING ALL WEIRD, TOO.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN? [ SCOFFS ]
NOTHING. GO. SHE'S ASKING FOR YOU. JUST GO.
REALLY? YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME THAT
WHEN I FIRST WALKED IN HERE.
WELL, WE WERE TALKING ABOUT THE FLOWERS, AND I JUST ‐‐
I DIDN'T WANT TO INTERRUPT.
I BETTER GO CHECK ON HER.
HOLD ON.
H‐‐ ESPERATE, ESPERATE BECAUSE I GOT TO GET THIS ALL OUT.
I HAVE WORKED HERE FOR YEARS.
SHE NEVER EVEN TALKS TO ME,
AND ALL OF A SUDDEN SHE HAS SO MUCH TO SAY TO YOU.
WHY IS THAT?
I DON'T KNOW.
I DON'T LIKE IT.
WILL YOU RELAX, CELINE?
BE CAREFUL WITH HER.
WE'LL TALK ABOUT YOUR ATTITUDE OR WHATEVER THIS IS
WHEN I COME BACK...
IF I HAVE THE PATIENCE.
I'LL BE RIGHT HERE.
MRS. CRYER? Katheryn: YES.
I'M HERE, HANNA.
THERE YOU ARE.
HOW ARE YOU?
ARE YOU OKAY?
JUST A LITTLE NAUSEOUS.
YEAH, I KNOW. [ SIGHS ]
IT'S THE CHEMO THAT DOES THAT.
IT USED TO KEEP ME UP AT NIGHT.
ALL I CAN DO IS SLEEP. OH, SLEEP IS GOOD!
[ MUMBLES ]
DID MR. CRYER EVEN NOTICE YOU WERE SICK?
[ CHUCKLES, COUGHS ]
I HAVE CANCER RIGHT UNDERNEATH THE MAN'S NOSE.
HE DOESN'T EVEN NOTICE.
[ CHUCKLES ]
YOU SLEEP IN THE SAME BED WITH HIM.
HE DOESN'T SEE ME.
HE HASN'T LOOKED AT ME IN YEARS.
MM.
I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.
DO YOU? YEAH.
THEY CAN BE LOOKING RIGHT AT YOU AND NOT SEE YOU.
YEAH.
I GUESS IT TAKES A WOMAN TO UNDERSTAND THAT.
IF YOU DON'T MIND MY ASKING, WHY DO YOU DO IT?
DO WHAT?
STAY.
[ SCOFFS ] WHERE AM I GONNA GO?
WHO'S GONNA WANT AN OLD WOMAN?
I'M OVER THE HILL.
OH, I THINK WE'RE ABOUT THE SAME AGE.
AS I SAID, WHO'S GONNA WANT AN OLD WOMAN?
[ CHUCKLES ] I BEG YOUR PARDON.
DO YOU HAVE A SUITOR?
NO.
WELL, THAT'S MY POINT.
ALTHOUGH, SOMETIMES I WONDER...
[SIGHS]
...WHAT AM I DOING THIS FOR, HANNA?
I'M 53 YEARS OLD.
MY CHILDREN HATE ME.
MY HUSBAND IS WITH ME BECAUSE HE HAS TO BE.
YOU DON'T REALLY BELIEVE THAT, DO YOU?
YES, I DO.
IF I DIDN'T HAVE YOU, HANNA, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WOULD DO.
OH...
YOU HAVE WAY MORE THAN ME. NO.
THAT'S JUST IT.
NO, HANNA, I DON'T.
WHAT'S THE POINT?
WHAT'S THE POINT OF EVEN FIGHTING THE CANCER?
YOU STOP THAT TALK RIGHT NOW.
I FELT THAT WAY MANY A TIME WHEN I WAS GOING THROUGH.
BUT I CAN PROMISE YOU THIS ‐‐
IF YOU GIVE UP, THE CANCER WILL WIN.
WOULD THAT BE SO BAD?
LIFE IS WORTH LIVING, MRS. CRYER.
BUT YOU HAVE TO FIGHT FOR HAPPINESS.
I'M SO TIRED. I KNOW.
I'M TIRED OF BEING ALONE IN THIS FAMILY.
I'M TIRED OF BEING ALONE IN MY MARRIAGE.
I'M TIRED OF BEING FAT.
I'M TIRED OF BEING NAUSEOUS.
I'M JUST TIRED OF BEING, HANNA.
I'M JUST TIRED OF BEING.
YOU SOUND LIKE ME A FEW MONTHS AGO.
HOLD ON.
STAY RIGHT THERE.
HANNA, I DON'T THINK
FRESH AIR'S GONNA MAKE ME FEEL ANY BETTER.
IT'S NOT FOR FRESH AIR ‐‐
NOT EXACTLY.
GOOD, BECAUSE THE FAN'S FACING THE WRONG WAY.
I KNOW. [ SNIFFLES ]
IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT IS?
IT'LL HELP YOUR STOMACH.
LISTEN, LITTLE MISS CHRISTIAN,
WHERE DID YOU GET THAT JOINT?
WHEN I WAS GOING THROUGH CHEMO,
I STARTED SMOKING THIS TO HELP SETTLE MY STOMACH.
I HAD SOME LEFTOVER.
HANNA.
WHAT? IT'S LEGAL!
I DON'T BELIEVE YOU.
[ BOTH LAUGH ]
YOU ARE FULL OF SURPRISES.
HAVE YOU EVER SMOKED A JOINT BEFORE?
YES, I DID. [ SQUEALS ]
[ LAUGHS ]
I RAN THROUGH THE STREETS STREAKING
BECAUSE I THOUGHT I WAS FREE.
[ LAUGHING ]
WELL, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU HAD, BUT IT WASN'T THIS.
[ CHUCKLES ]
GO ON.
LIGHT IT UP.
WHERE'S CELINE?
SHE'S IN THE KITCHEN. IT'S FINE. GO ON.
YOU HAVE SOME WITH ME? [ CHUCKLES ]
I'M WORKING.
I'M NOT SICK.
COME ON!
I'M THE BOSS.
[ CHUCKLES ]
NOT LIKE YOUR OPERATING HEAVY MACHINERY AROUND HERE.
WHAT'S THE WORST THAT COULD HAPPEN?
YOU TAKE OUT A VACUUM CLEANER?
[ BOTH LAUGH ]
NO, MA'AM.
MY STOMACH IS FINE.
IT'S YOURS THAT NEEDS COMFORTING.
WELL...
HERE GOES.
[ SIGHS ]
MAN, I LOVE ANGRY SEX.
YOU'RE GOING TO BREAK YOUR BUTTONS.
ARE YOU REALLY ANGRY?
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
[ SIGHS ] I'M SORRY.
I WAS IN A DESPERATE SITUATION, OR I WOULDN'T HAVE DONE IT.
A LOT OF PEOPLE GET THEMSELVES INTO DESPERATE SITUATIONS;
THEY DON'T EXTORT MONEY, CANDACE.
[ SIGHS ] I KNOW.
AND BY THE WAY, WHAT YOU DID WAS ILLEGAL.
I COULD HAVE HAD YOU ARRESTED.
WHY DIDN'T YOU?
THANK YOU FOR NOT DOING IT.
DON'T THANK ME FOR ANYTHING.
I CAN'T THANK YOU FOR BEING AN INCREDIBLE LOVER?
AND DON'T PLACATE ME, EITHER.
OKAY.
SO, YOU MARKED ME, RIGHT?
NO.
NOT REALLY.
I MET YOUR DAUGHTER, AND SHE STARTED TALKING ABOUT YOU,
SO I RESEARCHED YOU
AND FOUND OUT THAT YOU TRIED ALL THESE AMAZING CASES,
AND IT DIDN'T HURT THAT YOU WERE HANDSOME.
HOW'D YOU DO IT? HOW DID YOU RESEARCH ME?
I WENT ONLINE AND FOUND YOU.
I SWEAR THAT WAS...FATE.
YOU SEE, THIS WAS MEANT TO BE.
NO, NO, NO, NO. THIS WAS NOT "MEANT TO BE."
NONE OF THIS WAS MEANT TO BE, CANDACE.
I AM A JUDGE WHO IS RUNNING FOR GOVERNOR.
I KNOW.
BUT A GIRL CAN DREAM.
DREAM ABOUT WHAT?
YOU AND ME BEING TOGETHER.
YOU ARE INSANE, YOU KNOW THAT?
[ SIGHS ] JIM...
[SIGHS]
...TELL ME THAT THIS HASN'T BEEN
THE MOST EXCITING TIME IN YOUR LIFE.
TELL ME THAT IN SOME...SICK WAY,
THIS HASN'T TURNED YOU ON.
WE HAVE TO STOP THIS ‐‐ ALL OF IT, NOW.
[ SIGHS ] I KNOW.
BUT...YOU AREN'T STRONG ENOUGH, AND NEITHER AM I.
[ SCOFFS ]
YOU'D BE VERY SURPRISED TO FIND OUT HOW STRONG I AM.
[ SIGHS ]
WE'RE JUST HAVING FUN.
WE'RE NOT HURTING ANYONE.
WHY CAN'T WE JUST DO IT...UNTIL WE GET TIRED OF EACH OTHER?
OH, I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE BECAUSE YOU BLACKMAILED ME?
I PROMISE YOU I WON'T DO IT AGAIN.
OH, YOU PROMISE?
MM‐HMM.
SAID THE LYING, BLACKMAILING HOOKER.
OUCH.
WELL, GIRL, IF THE STILETTOS FIT, WEAR 'EM.
OKAY.
I WON'T BOTHER YOU AGAIN.
YEAH, RIGHT.
[ CHUCKLES ]
AND FOR THE RECORD, I'M NO LONGER AN ESCORT.
THANKS TO YOU.
NOW I'M A FULL‐TIME STUDENT.
HEY, HEY, HEY.
DOES MY DAUGHTER KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THIS? ANYTHING AT ALL?
NO. SHE COULDN'T HANDLE IT.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
I WOULD CHECK IN WITH HER IF I WERE YOU.
SHE'S HAVING A VERY DIFFICULT TIME IN SCHOOL.
HELLO, DARLING.
WELL, HELLO.
MM.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
I CAME TO TAKE MY HUSBAND TO LUNCH.
OH, SWEETHEART, I CAN'T.
I HAVE SOME VERY IMPORTANT MEETINGS.
JIM AND I ARE INTERVIEWING CAMPAIGN‐MANAGER PROSPECTS.
OKAY.
WHAT IS SHE DOING HERE?
JIM HAS BEEN HELPING HER WITH HER THESIS.
AND HAVE YOU BEEN HELPING HER?
[ SCOFFS ] NO.
WHY WOULD YOU ASK THAT?
JUST WONDERED.
OKAY.
I HAVE TO GO.
OKAY.
WHAT IS GOING ON?
VERONICA AND I JUST SAW CANDACE LEAVING YOUR OFFICE.
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?
SHE DIDN'T ASK FOR ANYTHING, OKAY?
YOUR FLY IS OPEN.
[ SIGHS ]
DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT.
DID YOU JUST SLEEP WITH HER?
WE WEREN'T SLEEPING.
OH, YOU HAVE LOST YOUR MIND!
Y‐‐ WE JUST PAID TO GET RID OF THAT GAL, AND N‐‐
ARE YOU ENJOYING YOURSELF?
WELL, SHE IS VERY, VERY GOOD AT SEX.
YOU DID NOT JUST SAY THAT.
[ SIGHS ]
WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO YOU?
DAVID, I KNOW YOU MUST THINK I'M CRAZY, RIGHT?
BUT I THINK ‐‐ I THINK CANDACE IS RIGHT.
WHEN SHE'S HERE, I FEEL ALIVE.
WHEN SHE'S AROUND, I FEEL ‐‐ I FEEL WANTED.
I DON'T GET THAT AT HOME.
SHE'S A PROSTITUTE.
THAT'S WHAT THEY DO IF THEY'RE ANY GOOD AT IT;
THEY MAKE YOU FEEL ALIVE. THEY ‐‐
LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING ‐‐ SHE'S NO LONGER A PROSTITUTE.
SHE'S A FULL‐TIME STUDENT.
YOU ARE RUNNING FOR GOVERNOR!
YOU STOP THIS NOW BEFORE ‐‐ BEFORE WHAT?
BEFORE YOU LOSE EVERYTHING.
BEFORE I LOSE EVERYTHING?
LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, DAVID.
IF SHE WANTED TO BURY ME, SHE ALREADY COULD.
SHE'S GOT EVERYTHING SHE NEEDS TO BURY ME,
AND SHE HAS NOT DONE IT.
DON'T YOU SEE? DON'T YOU GET IT?
I'M DEAD.
I MIGHT AS WELL ENJOY MYSELF. I'VE ALREADY PAID FOR IT.
IT'S THAT KIND OF THINKING THAT RUINS CAREERS.
MY CAREER TO RUIN.
OR IS IT OURS YOU'RE WORRIED ABOUT?!
[ DIALING ]
DETECTIVE.
YES, I WANTED TO MAKE IT HAPPEN.
MAKE IT HAPPEN TODAY.
[ FAUCET RUNNING ]
TAKING A QUICK HO BATH?
EXCUSE ME?
A HO BATH.
IT'S WHEN A WHORE, SUCH AS YOURSELF,
HAS FINISHED HER DEED,
AND SHE RUNS TO WASH UP TO GET READY FOR HER NEXT...TRICK.
WELL, APPARENTLY YOU KNOW A LOT ABOUT BEING A WHORE.
APPARENTLY YOU KNOW A FEW THINGS ABOUT MY HUSBAND.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
I KNOW YOU... AND YOUR SIZE TWO.
YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST WALK INTO A WOMAN'S LIFE
AND TAKE THE MAN SHE'S DESIGNED FOR HERSELF?
YOU YOUNG BITCHES THINK YOU CAN JUST REPLACE US MATURE WOMEN.
LADY, YOU'RE DELUSIONAL.
AM I?
FIND ANOTHER ONE!
EXCUSE ME.
I AM NOT DONE TALKING TO YOU.
HONEY...
...I MET YOU TWICE.
I DON'T KNOW YOU.
SO YOU DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY TO ME.
[ CHUCKLES ]
I MAY BE IVY LEAGUE AND REFINED,
BUT I'M A GIRL FROM THE SOUTH SIDE OF CHICAGO,
AND MY ROOTS ARE NEVER FAR AWAY.
SO YOU COME WITHIN 500 FEET OF MY HUSBAND AGAIN...
[CHUCKLES]
...AND I WILL WHIP YO' ASS.
[ CHUCKLES ] [ LAUGHS ]
YOU THINK?
MM.
YOUR PITIFUL HUSBAND CANNOT DO ANYTHING FOR ME ‐‐ AT ALL!
AND, FOR THE RECORD,
IF I WAS AFTER HIM, HE WOULD ALREADY BE GONE.
YOU THINK SO?
I KNOW.
I KNOW MY GIFTS. [ CHUCKLES ]
500...FEET.
YOU ARE SO SAD.
I DON'T WANT HIM.
I KNOW ABOUT THE CAR.
THE CAR? YES.
[ CHUCKLES ]
YOU DON'T KNOW A THING.
WHY DID HE GIVE IT TO YOU?
FIRST OF ALL, HE DIDN'T GIVE ME A CAR.
HE DELIVERED IT.
THERE IS A DIFFERENCE.
WHY WOULD A JUDGE "DELIVER" A CAR TO YOU?
YOU NEED TO TALK TO YOUR HUSBAND.
I'LL ACCEPT YOUR APOLOGY LATER.
SO, YOU'RE REALLY NOT SLEEPING WITH HIM?
I HATE TO DISAPPOINT YOU,
BUT I AM NOT IN THE LEAST BIT ATTRACTED TO YOUR HUSBAND.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW HIM. GOOD.
'CAUSE YOU NEED TO BE WITH SOMEONE
CLOSER TO YOUR OWN AGE...
OR MY SON'S AGE.
OH, GOD. WHAT?
I KNOW YOU'RE NOT SUGGESTING THAT I MEET YOUR SON.
NO. GOOD.
BECAUSE YOU ARE SO ASS‐BACKWARDS.
YOU THINK I'M SLEEPING WITH YOUR HUSBAND,
AND YOU THINK YOUR SON IS STRAIGHT.
LADY...MAYBE YOU NEED TO GO BACK INTO REHAB.
EXCUSE ME.
[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]
GIVE ME A MINUTE!
HI. HI.
IS YOUR MOM HOME?
NO, SHE'S AT WORK.
AT WORK? YEAH. WORK.
OH, THAT'S STRANGE.
WHAT'S STRANGE ABOUT IT?
WELL, SHE ASKED ME TO BRING HER LUNCH TODAY.
REALLY? YEAH.
SHE ASKED ME TO COOK LUNCH FOR HER, BRING IT HERE,
AND DROP IT OFF AT NOON. HM.
THAT IS STRANGE.
WELL, I KNOW I'M NOT CRAZY.
SHE CLEARLY SAID SHE WANTED
POT ROAST AND POTATOES FOR LUNCH TODAY.
YOU'VE GOT POT ROAST IN THERE?
YEAH. OH, THAT'S MY FAVORITE.
OH!
[ CHUCKLES ] OKAY.
DID I MISS SOMETHING? [ CHUCKLES ]
I ‐‐ APPARENTLY I DID.
OH, HI, I'M BENNY.
DARCI. I'M HER SON.
DARCI FROM THE CHURCH?
YES.
WITHOUT THE HEADGEAR AND BRACES, YEAH.
WOW.
I MEAN, YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL. THANK YOU.
I MEAN, NOT THAT YOU WEREN'T ALWAYS BEAUTIFUL.
RIGHT? YOU'RE JUST MORE BEAUTIFUL NOW.
JUST ‐‐ JUST SAVE IT.
COME ON, LIKE ‐‐ LIKE BACK THEN, THE BEAUTY'S ON THE INSIDE.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? THIS COMPLIMENT'S GOING LEFT.
DO YOU MIND IF I SET THIS DOWN SOMEWHERE?
I'M SORRY. YEAH. COME ON.
SET IT RIGHT ON THE COUNTER.
DARCI FROM THE CHURCH...
IT'S JUST CRAZY 'CAUSE MY MOM
JUST MENTIONED YOU THE OTHER DAY.
REALLY?
YEAH, I MEAN, SHE SAID YOU CHANGED, BUT...
WOW. [ CHUCKLES ]
I DIDN'T KNOW HOW MUCH YOU CHANGED, ACTUALLY.
THAT MAKES SENSE.
WHAT MAKES SENSE?
HER ASKING ME TO MAKE YOUR FAVORITES...
YEAH?
AND SHE KNEW YOU WERE GONNA BE HOME FOR LUNCH TODAY, RIGHT?
I MEAN, YEAH. I COME HOME EVERY DAY FOR LUNCH.
RIGHT.
THIS WHOLE THING WAS A TRICK TO GET US TOGETHER.
COME ON. MY MOTHER WOULDN'T DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
SHE DID.
GOT PEACH COBBLER IN THAT BASKET?
YES.
OKAY.
[ BOTH LAUGH ] SHE DID IT.
WOW.
YEAH. "WOW" IS RIGHT.
NO, I WAS SAYING "WOW"
'CAUSE YOU NEED YOUR MAMA TO HOOK YOU UP.
THINGS THAT BAD?
NO.
SHE SAID YOU BROKE UP WITH WHAT'S‐HER‐FACE.
YEAH, WELL, I MEAN, THAT'S OVER AND DONE WITH, SO...
WELL, GOOD FOR YOU. SHE'S NO GOOD.
TRUST ME ‐‐ I FIGURED THAT OUT THE HARD WAY.
YIKES.
SO, HERE'S YOUR LUNCH.
THANK YOU.
WOULD YOU LIKE TO SHARE IT WITH ME?
NO. I ONLY MADE ENOUGH FOR ONE.
OH. WELL, UH...
WELL, THANK YOU.
OH, HEY, THANK YOUR MOTHER.
[ CHUCKLES ] I GOT TO GO.
WELL, I MEAN, WHAT'S THE RUSH?
I GOT A JOB.
OH, OKAY.
WELL, THANK YOU, DARCI FROM THE CHURCH.
HEY, UM...
DO YOU THINK MAYBE SOMETIME I COULD, UH...
TAKE YOU OUT OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT?
I MEAN, LET ME AT LEAST BUY YOU DINNER OR SOMETHING
FOR THIS LITTLE JOKE MY MOM JUST PLAYED.
YOU DON'T LOOK AT ME TWICE IN CHURCH.
NOW YOU WANT TO GO OUT?
COME ON! LET ME MAKE IT UP TO YOU.
PLEASE. [ BOTH CHUCKLE ]
BETTER BE GLAD YOU'RE CUTE, BENJAMIN.
[ CHUCKLES ]
YOU KNOW, I LIKE IT WHEN YOU SAY MY NAME LIKE THAT.
[ BOTH CHUCKLE ]
OH, FINE. YEAH. I'LL GO OUT WITH YOU.
YEAH? YEAH.
WHEN?
I'M FREE TODAY, AFTER 5:00.
OKAY.
I GOT TO GET TO WORK.
TELL YOUR MOM I'M GONNA GET HER FOR THIS ONE.
OH, TRUST ME, I WILL. [ CHUCKLES ]
SEE YOU, DARCI. BYE.
[ SNIFFS ]
[ SIGHS ]
DAVID, I NEED TO TALK TO YOU.
CAN THIS WAIT UNTIL I GET HOME?
I KNOW ABOUT THE CAR.
WHAT CAR?
THE ONE YOU BOUGHT FOR HER.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU THINK YOU KNOW, BUT YOU'RE WRONG.
WHY DID YOU GIVE HER THAT CAR?
I DIDN'T GIVE HER A CAR. I HAVE A CLIENT.
A CLIENT?
YOU DON'T PRACTICE LAW ANYMORE. YOU'RE A JUDGE NOW.
I HAVE A CLIENT, AN OLD CLIENT, HIGH‐PROFILE.
HE WANTED TO GIVE HER A CAR, KEEP A DISTANCE.
WHY WOULD HE CALL YOU?
DO YOU TRUST ME?
YES, I DO. OKAY.
THEN YOU HAVE TO LET THIS GO.
IT'S A HIGHLY SENSITIVE MATTER.
PLEASE DON'T ASK ME TO EXPLAIN IT ALL TO YOU.
AND YOU ARE SURE THERE IS NOTHING GOING ON.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW HER.
I DON'T.
OKAY.
[ CHUCKLES ]
ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.
WAIT A MINUTE.
HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THE CAR?
I MEAN, I KNOW SHE DIDN'T TELL YOU I GAVE IT TO HER.
HONEY ‐‐ VERONICA.
I HAD YOU FOLLOWED.
WHAT?!
YOU WERE ACTING STRANGE FOR THE PAST FEW WEEKS.
I HAD TO FIND OUT WHAT WAS GOING ON.
SO YOU HAD ME FOLLOWED? YES, I DID.
AND I'M SORRY. I KNOW YOU'RE UPSET.
OF COURSE I'M UPSET! YOU DON'T TRUST ME.
I DO!
YOU KNOW I CAN BE A CRAZY WOMAN SOMETIMES.
I'M SORRY, REALLY I AM.
WE'RE GONNA TALK ABOUT THIS AT HOME.
OKAY.
I AM SORRY.
OKAY.
TALK ABOUT IT LATER.
OKAY.
HANNA? MM?
DO YOU SMELL THAT? SMELL WHAT?
IT SMELLS LIKE ‐‐ IT SMELLS LIKE MARIJUANA.
I DON'T SMELL ANYTHING.
YES, YOU DO.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
[ LAUGHS ]
WHAT IS GOING ON IN THIS HOUSE?!
WHAT?
OKAY.
FIRST, YOU'RE CLEANING
WHERE YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE CLEANING,
AND NOW YOU'RE COVERING FOR KATHERYN.
FOR WHO?
YOU HEARD ME ‐‐ KATHERYN! MM.
GIRL, OOH, YOU ARE KILLING ME.
NO, AND YOU MUST THINK I'M STUPID.
OH, GO ON, SOMEWHERE WITH THAT, CELINE.
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
SHE'S SMOKING POT, HUH?
I'M GONNA TELL JIM.
NO, SHE'S NOT.
YES, SHE IS.
LISTEN, IF WYATT WAS HERE,
I'D SAY, "OKAY, MAYBE IT'S WYATT,"
BUT HE ISN'T, SO OBVIOUSLY IT'S HER.
[ Chuckling ] OH, GOD.
WAIT TILL JIM COMES HOME.
YOU CAN'T RUN UP THERE AND TELL HER HUSBAND. SHE'S GROWN.
YES, I CAN.
HE DOESN'T ALLOW DRUGS IN THIS HOUSE.
WELL, THIS IS HER HOUSE.
IT'S HIS, TOO!
WELL, FROM WHAT I HEAR, SHE'S THE ONE WHO BOUGHT IT.
EXCUSE ME, BUT JIM HAS A LOT OF MONEY ON HIS OWN.
MM‐HMM.
WELL, HER FAMILY HAS MORE MONEY THAN HIM.
REALLY? WHO TOLD YOU THAT?
NOBODY TOLD ME. THAT'S JUST WHAT'S SAID.
THAT IS NOT TRUE.
THAT MAN SACRIFICES EVERYTHING FOR HER,
AND WHAT DOES SHE DO?
SHE TREATS HIM SO POORLY.
SHE'S AWFUL.
YOU NEED TO STAY OUT OF THESE PEOPLE'S BUSINESS.
MM. I'M TELLING HIM.
I'M TELLING JIM THE MINUTE HE WALKS IN THAT DOOR.
I WISH THERE WAS SOME WEED SOMEWHERE IN HERE
'CAUSE YOU SURE NEED SOME.
OH, HA‐HA.
YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY?
IT'S NOT FUNNY, HANNA ‐‐ NOT FUNNY AT ALL.
OH, CELINE, WILL YOU CALM DOWN?
NO.
I KNOW MARIJUANA WHEN I SMELL IT.
SOMETHING'S GOING ON,
AND I'M GONNA GET TO THE BOTTOM OF IT.
WILL YOU RELAX, CELINE?
[ CELLPHONE RINGS ]
[ CELLPHONE BEEPS ]
I'M NOT AVAILABLE RIGHT NOW,
but if you leave a message at the sound of the tone.
MAMA. Hi.
DON'T "HI" ME. Is your belly full?
[ CHUCKLES ] VERY FUNNY.
I BET YOU'RE FINISHING OFF THAT PEACH COBBLER RIGHT NOW.
[ CHUCKLES ] VERY FUNNY.
DID YOU MEET HER?
YOU KNOW, THAT WAS VERY SNEAKY OF YOU, MOMMY.
I wasn't even dressed right when she came to the door.
WHY'D YOU HAVE TO BE DRESSED RIGHT?
YOU TOLD ME YOU DIDN'T EVEN WANT TO SEE DARCI.
YEAH, BUT SHE'S CHANGED, MAMA.
I told you. She's beautiful.
YEAH, SHE IS.
DID YOU ASK HER OUT?
COME ON. I ALREADY DID.
[ SQUEALS ] THAT'S MY BOY!
GET BACK AT IT!
YOU ARE WRONG.
LISTEN, YOU ARE TOO YOUNG NOT TO BE GOING OUT HAVING FUN.
YEAH, I HEAR THAT, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?
What?
ONE GOOD TRICK DESERVES ANOTHER.
WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?
I'M GONNA HOOK YOU UP NOW.
OH, BOY, WHATEVER.
NO, I AM, SERIOUSLY.
TRY TO SAVE ME SOME PEACH COBBLER, HEAR?
[ CHUCKLES ] IT'S GONE.
THIS IS BETTER THAN YOURS, MAMA.
Oh, I know that's a lie. [ BOTH CHUCKLE ]
OKAY.
I HAVE TO GO.
OKAY. I LOVE YOU. BYE.
HI. HI.
CAN I GET YOU SOMETHING?
NO.
I JUST NEED HANNA.
OF COURSE YOU DO.
THIS WAY, PLEASE.
[ CHUCKLES ]
[ SIGHS ]
I TAKE IT YOU'RE FEELING BETTER.
I CAN'T FEEL ANYTHING AT ALL. [ CHUCKLES ]
GOOD.
I CAN'T EVEN FEEL MY TOES.
[ BOTH LAUGH ]
I REMEMBER THE FEELING, OR THE LACK THEREOF.
OH, THIS IS GOOD STUFF.
CAN YOU GET ME SOME MORE?
NO!
YOU NEED TO TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR AND ASK HIM FOR SOME.
[ SIGHS ] HE'S SUCH AN OLD, STIFF FART.
HE SHOULD HAVE SUGGESTED IT.
WELL, I AM NOT YOUR PUSHER,
AND I WILL NOT BE BRINGING YOU DOPE.
BUT I FEEL SO GOOD!
I'M SORRY.
MAYBE IT'S FOR THE BEST. MM‐HMM.
TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR.
YOU'RE SUCH AN OLD SPOIL‐SPORT.
Veronica: KAT?
COMING!
THERE'S YOUR FRIEND.
DO I ‐‐ YOU LOOK FINE.
KAT?
HI.
WHAT'S GOING ON?
WHY ARE YOU SMILING SO HARD?
AM I?
SORRY.
I CONFRONTED HER. REALLY?
YES, I DID.
AND WHAT HAPPENED?
WELL, IT WAS ALL A BIG MISUNDERSTANDING.
DAVID HAS A CLIENT THAT'S DOING BUSINESS WITH HER,
BUT, THANK GOD, SHE IS NOT SLEEPING WITH DAVID.
[ SIGHS ] WELL, I TOLD YOU THAT.
I KNOW.
YOU WERE RIGHT.
THANK YOU FOR TALKING ME THROUGH IT.
SURE. [ PATS HAND ]
ANYTIME.
WOULD YOU LIKE SOME TEA?
NO.
I HAVE TO DRIVE TO THE CENTER TO MEET WITH JEFFREY,
AND THEN I HAVE TO GET HOME TO MAKE IT UP TO DAVID.
MAKE UP WHAT?
I TOLD HIM I HAD HIM FOLLOWED.
HE WAS LIVID.
WHY DID YOU DO THAT?
[ CHUCKLES ] I FELT SO BAD!
I HAD TO TELL HIM THE TRUTH.
WELL, YOU BETTER GET REPENTING.
[ LAUGHING ]
ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE OKAY?
I'M FINE. JUST ‐‐ JUST GO. JUST GO.
OKAY. [ LAUGHING ]
WELL, I WILL CALL YOU.
OKAY! OKAY?
OKAY! ALL RIGHT.
SAY HI TO DAVID.
OKAY. "HI."
BYE!
"HI!" [ DOOR CLOSES ]
[ Laughing ] I'M SO HIGH.
[ SIGHS ]
I'M HUNGRY.
[ SIGHS ]
MOM. [ CHUCKLES ]
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU MAKE A PERSONAL VISIT
UNLESS THERE WAS SOMETHING WRONG WITH ONE OF THE PATIENTS.
NO, SON. THIS VISIT IS ABOUT YOU.
ME?
WHAT ‐‐ WHAT'S GOING ON?
IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO GET A GIRLFRIEND.
MM.
[ CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY ] GET A ‐‐
THIS IS RANDOM.
NO, IT'S NOT.
YOU NEED A GIRLFRIEND. WELL, MOM...
I MEAN, ALL I DO IS WORK AROUND HERE.
I DON'T HAVE TIME TO DATE. I OWN THE PLACE.
MAKE TIME.
WHERE IS THIS COMING FROM?
YOUR FATHER IS RUNNING FOR LIEUTENANT GOVERNOR,
AND WE NEED TO LOOK THE PART.
A WOMAN IN YOUR LIFE IS LONG OVERDUE.
HAVE YOU MET ANYONE LATELY?
[ SIGHS ] NO, MOM.
THEN WE NEED TO GET SOMEONE TO FIX YOU UP.
MOM, I DON'T LIKE BLIND DATES.
YOU HAVEN'T BEEN DOING A VERY GOOD JOB OF IT,
SO I WILL MAKE A FEW PHONE CALLS.
NO. NO, NO, YOU DON'T HAVE TO CALL ANYONE, MOM.
WHAT TYPE OF WOMEN DO YOU LIKE?
MOM, I ‐‐ JUST...
WHAT...TYPE OF WOMEN... DO YOU LIKE?
MOM...
I NEED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING.
NO, YOU DON'T.
I THINK YOU LIKE TALL WOMEN
THAT ARE BUSTY AND SMART,
NATURAL‐LOOKING, BLACK...GIRLS.
THAT'S WHAT YOU LIKE, AND THAT'S WHAT YOU WILL FIND,
AND THAT'S ALL YOUR FATHER AND I WILL EVER ACCEPT ‐‐
NOTHING ELSE.
NOTHING...ELSE.
I'D RATHER NOT HAVE A SON AT ALL THAN TO HAVE A SON
THAT'S NOT ATTRACTED TO TALL, BUSTY,
NATURAL‐LOOKING, BLACK...GIRLS.
DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR, JEFFREY?
YES, MOTHER.
VERY.
GOOD.
THEN I WILL EXPECT TO MEET HER SOON.
ENJOY THE REST OF YOUR EVENING, SON.
NEXT ON "THE HAVES AND THE HAVE NOTS"...
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF HIM?
WHO? MY SON.
SHE THINKS I'M GONNA BE THE ONE
THAT TELLS HER THAT HER SON IS GAY?
SHE BETTER THINK AGAIN.
MOVE? WHERE'S SHE MOVING TO?
SHE AND CANDACE ARE GETTING A PLACE TOGETHER.
YOU LOOK NICE.
[ CHUCKLES ]
WHAT IS HE DOING?
HE'S TRYING TO ASK HER OUT.
YOU KNOW SHE THINKS HE'S GAY.
YOU ‐‐