1 00:00:01,402 --> 00:00:02,836 Back in the '80s, my sister, Erica, 2 00:00:02,970 --> 00:00:05,473 and Geoff Schwartz had quite the love story. 3 00:00:05,606 --> 00:00:08,642 From friends to lovers to exes and lovers again, 4 00:00:08,776 --> 00:00:10,844 all culminating in an epic proposal. 5 00:00:10,978 --> 00:00:13,447 Finally, the wedding was here. 6 00:00:13,581 --> 00:00:15,716 It's nice. Peaceful. 7 00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:17,151 Are we in the right place? 8 00:00:17,285 --> 00:00:18,319 And to think I was worried 9 00:00:18,452 --> 00:00:19,787 your mom would do something crazy. 10 00:00:19,920 --> 00:00:21,021 I mean, the Harlem Globetrotters 11 00:00:21,155 --> 00:00:22,523 were at your brother's bar mitzvah. 12 00:00:22,656 --> 00:00:24,658 Curly Neal dribbled the entire service. 13 00:00:24,792 --> 00:00:26,394 Well, I guess she finally heard us. 14 00:00:26,527 --> 00:00:28,162 People really can grow and change. 15 00:00:28,296 --> 00:00:30,164 Tech rehearsal starts now! 16 00:00:30,298 --> 00:00:31,432 We are two days out. 17 00:00:31,565 --> 00:00:34,168 I want to see sweaty bodies and high knees. 18 00:00:34,302 --> 00:00:35,636 What's happening? Why do we need a tech rehearsal? 19 00:00:35,769 --> 00:00:37,705 I just added a few flourishes to the ceremony. 20 00:00:37,838 --> 00:00:38,806 Wardrobe! 21 00:00:40,708 --> 00:00:42,376 The wardrobe is my wedding dress. 22 00:00:42,510 --> 00:00:43,811 No, that's your fourth change, 23 00:00:43,944 --> 00:00:45,479 so go ahead and put on these processional outfits 24 00:00:45,613 --> 00:00:46,880 and let's do this. 25 00:00:48,516 --> 00:00:49,850 Yep, my mom believed in going big. 26 00:00:49,983 --> 00:00:51,685 Why do I have a sword? I don't think I can walk in this. 27 00:00:51,819 --> 00:00:54,688 Oh, you won't be walking. Good men of Rome! 28 00:00:54,822 --> 00:00:56,357 Then she went even bigger. 29 00:00:56,490 --> 00:00:57,858 Cue the buglers! 30 00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:01,495 Some would say over the top. 31 00:01:01,629 --> 00:01:03,097 Where are my unicorns? 32 00:01:03,231 --> 00:01:05,233 Way, way over the top. 33 00:01:05,366 --> 00:01:06,500 Unicorns aren't real! 34 00:01:06,634 --> 00:01:07,901 This whole thing can't be real! 35 00:01:08,035 --> 00:01:10,204 Cue the New Orleans jazz band! 36 00:01:13,841 --> 00:01:15,409 Wow. She's really all over the map 37 00:01:15,543 --> 00:01:16,910 with the different styles and genres. 38 00:01:17,044 --> 00:01:18,346 Yeah, that's the problem. 39 00:01:18,479 --> 00:01:20,148 Cherry blossoms! Flutter! Now! 40 00:01:22,049 --> 00:01:23,217 How did that happen? 41 00:01:23,351 --> 00:01:25,186 Six men are living in those trees full-time. 42 00:01:25,319 --> 00:01:26,520 They pee in buckets. 43 00:01:26,654 --> 00:01:28,389 Fire-eaters, you should be lit by now! 44 00:01:29,790 --> 00:01:31,425 Mom, we have to talk about this! 45 00:01:31,559 --> 00:01:32,660 One step ahead of you. 46 00:01:32,793 --> 00:01:34,562 We need more. Way more. 47 00:01:34,695 --> 00:01:36,930 And where the hell are my acrobats? 48 00:01:37,064 --> 00:01:38,532 Yep, those guys were there, too. 49 00:01:38,666 --> 00:01:40,501 My mom left nothing out. 50 00:01:40,634 --> 00:01:41,635 This looks expensive. 51 00:01:41,769 --> 00:01:43,471 Where the hell did my mom go? 52 00:01:43,604 --> 00:01:46,240 Something tells me that giant clamshell is gonna clue us in. 53 00:01:46,374 --> 00:01:48,342 Here's my big reveal! 54 00:01:50,344 --> 00:01:52,746 ♪ I'm twisted up inside 55 00:01:52,880 --> 00:01:55,383 ♪ But nonetheless, I feel the need to say 56 00:01:58,552 --> 00:02:00,120 ♪ I don't know the future 57 00:02:00,254 --> 00:02:02,456 ♪ But the past keeps getting clearer every day ♪ 58 00:02:04,158 --> 00:02:06,026 It was March 2nd, 1980-something, 59 00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:09,062 and my mom had turned my sister's wedding into a literal freak show. 60 00:02:09,197 --> 00:02:10,130 Erica was coming undone. 61 00:02:10,264 --> 00:02:11,432 It's all too much. 62 00:02:11,565 --> 00:02:12,833 I think I'm losing it. 63 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:14,168 I've never seen you like this. 64 00:02:14,302 --> 00:02:16,337 It's like all your sarcastic, tough-girl energy 65 00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:18,772 has been sucked away and replaced with nervous anxiety. 66 00:02:18,906 --> 00:02:20,308 Oh, God! I'm you! 67 00:02:20,441 --> 00:02:22,142 You're me! We can't have two yous! 68 00:02:22,276 --> 00:02:23,377 I know. One me is too many! 69 00:02:23,511 --> 00:02:24,612 Trying to watch the Weather Channel, 70 00:02:24,745 --> 00:02:26,347 and I already missed the dew point! 71 00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:27,681 The dew point! 72 00:02:27,815 --> 00:02:29,116 You want to know the weather? 73 00:02:29,250 --> 00:02:30,984 I'm spinning like a tornado here! 74 00:02:31,118 --> 00:02:32,286 Yeah, sure, whatever. 75 00:02:32,420 --> 00:02:33,654 That's it! I'm almost your husband, 76 00:02:33,787 --> 00:02:35,856 and it is time that I stand up for you. 77 00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:38,426 Time to go confront your mom. Here I go! 78 00:02:38,559 --> 00:02:39,693 You're not moving. Building up to it. 79 00:02:39,827 --> 00:02:40,794 Sending the message 80 00:02:40,928 --> 00:02:42,796 from my brain to my muscles. 81 00:02:42,930 --> 00:02:43,664 Here I mostly go! 82 00:02:48,068 --> 00:02:49,169 Mrs. Goldberg, I need... 83 00:02:49,303 --> 00:02:50,738 One second, Geoff, I've got a troupe 84 00:02:50,871 --> 00:02:52,606 of Chinese acrobats lost in Delaware. 85 00:02:52,740 --> 00:02:55,309 Ni xuyao shang 95 bei, 86 00:02:55,443 --> 00:02:58,178 huozhe wo hui ba no shuai dao taikong. 87 00:02:58,312 --> 00:03:00,147 Now, you selfishly need something 88 00:03:00,281 --> 00:03:02,015 24 hours before my glorious day? 89 00:03:02,149 --> 00:03:03,817 It is about your glorious day, actually. 90 00:03:03,951 --> 00:03:05,118 It has turned into something 91 00:03:05,253 --> 00:03:06,554 way bigger than we expected. 92 00:03:06,687 --> 00:03:08,456 Oh, thank you for noticing. 93 00:03:08,589 --> 00:03:09,790 It was impossible not to notice. 94 00:03:09,923 --> 00:03:11,592 You're just saying that. 95 00:03:11,725 --> 00:03:13,427 Are you trying to sweet-talk your mother-in-law? 96 00:03:13,561 --> 00:03:14,995 No, what I'm trying to say is, 97 00:03:15,128 --> 00:03:16,697 our small, intimate ceremony 98 00:03:16,830 --> 00:03:18,799 has turned into an over-the-top spectacle. 99 00:03:18,932 --> 00:03:20,133 You really think so? 100 00:03:20,268 --> 00:03:21,469 I don't think you're gonna hear this 101 00:03:21,602 --> 00:03:23,003 how I intend it, but... Yes? 102 00:03:23,136 --> 00:03:24,838 You know, I don't say this enough, 103 00:03:24,972 --> 00:03:27,040 but you are not that bad, Geoffrey. 104 00:03:27,174 --> 00:03:28,976 Now you relax. I'm gonna confirm 105 00:03:29,109 --> 00:03:31,178 the surprise musical entertainment. 106 00:03:31,312 --> 00:03:33,847 I'm not gonna give any hints, but let's just say 107 00:03:33,981 --> 00:03:36,784 it hits all the right "Marks." 108 00:03:36,917 --> 00:03:38,386 Seems like you're suggesting it will be 109 00:03:38,519 --> 00:03:39,653 multiple people named Mark. 110 00:03:39,787 --> 00:03:41,054 Well, aren't you the sleuth. 111 00:03:41,188 --> 00:03:42,990 Now go enjoy your last day of freedom. 112 00:03:43,123 --> 00:03:44,558 But don't eat anything, or else you won't fit 113 00:03:44,692 --> 00:03:46,394 into your sequined matador costume. 114 00:03:46,527 --> 00:03:48,195 I measured you in your sleep. 115 00:03:48,329 --> 00:03:50,197 But I don't live in the same house as you. 116 00:03:50,331 --> 00:03:51,932 I know. 117 00:03:52,065 --> 00:03:53,801 How'd it go? Extremely terribly. 118 00:03:53,934 --> 00:03:56,236 Oh, God! There's nothing we can do to stop this! 119 00:03:56,370 --> 00:03:58,539 It was hopeless. Or was it? 120 00:03:58,672 --> 00:04:01,008 We have a winter storm alert. 121 00:04:01,141 --> 00:04:03,010 We had hoped that it might miss us, 122 00:04:03,143 --> 00:04:06,580 but now Philadelphia is directly in the path of a doozie. 123 00:04:06,714 --> 00:04:07,781 Is this really happening? 124 00:04:07,915 --> 00:04:09,550 This is really happening, folks. 125 00:04:09,683 --> 00:04:13,086 Yes! I just heard the word "storm"! 126 00:04:13,220 --> 00:04:14,888 It had better be over a place that doesn't matter, 127 00:04:15,022 --> 00:04:16,690 like wherever it is that farmers are. 128 00:04:16,824 --> 00:04:19,427 Nope, right here. Crazy unseasonal winter blast. 129 00:04:19,560 --> 00:04:21,028 They're saying it's gonna be a doozie. 130 00:04:21,161 --> 00:04:23,564 But wait. Oh, no! The wedding! 131 00:04:23,697 --> 00:04:25,032 Schmoo, don't fret. 132 00:04:25,165 --> 00:04:27,568 I'll just send that nor'easter back out to the sea 133 00:04:27,701 --> 00:04:30,371 with my endless well of Mama love. 134 00:04:30,504 --> 00:04:31,439 Yeah. 135 00:04:31,572 --> 00:04:32,873 What exactly is happening? 136 00:04:33,006 --> 00:04:35,309 Foul tempest, I banish thee! 137 00:04:35,443 --> 00:04:37,077 The weather, you can't control it. 138 00:04:37,210 --> 00:04:39,880 Begone, evil squall! 139 00:04:40,013 --> 00:04:41,882 Will you look at that? 140 00:04:42,015 --> 00:04:44,785 Now our storm is actually changing course! 141 00:04:44,918 --> 00:04:45,919 Changing wha... 142 00:04:46,053 --> 00:04:47,655 In all my years of meteorology, 143 00:04:47,788 --> 00:04:49,089 I've never seen anything like this! 144 00:04:50,458 --> 00:04:51,892 No one had. 145 00:04:52,025 --> 00:04:53,727 It had to be a crazy coincidence, right? 146 00:04:53,861 --> 00:04:55,429 Folks, we've been spared. 147 00:04:56,530 --> 00:04:58,065 See? It's all good. 148 00:04:58,198 --> 00:05:00,300 We're gettin' married! Mwah! 149 00:05:01,635 --> 00:05:04,472 I don't... I can't... How? 150 00:05:04,605 --> 00:05:06,306 Is my mother-in-law a storm god? 151 00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:08,442 I guess we have no choice but to accept it. 152 00:05:08,576 --> 00:05:10,678 This wedding is happening. 153 00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:12,446 As Erica continued to spin, 154 00:05:12,580 --> 00:05:15,649 Barry and I also had strong feelings about the big day. 155 00:05:15,783 --> 00:05:18,118 So, what are you planning for Erica's marriage thingy? 156 00:05:18,251 --> 00:05:19,720 Showing up. You? 157 00:05:19,853 --> 00:05:22,089 I may pop in. What are you gonna wear to this shindig? 158 00:05:22,222 --> 00:05:24,291 Mom rented me a tux, top hat, and tails. 159 00:05:24,425 --> 00:05:26,326 You didn't get the cane? I don't need a cane! 160 00:05:26,460 --> 00:05:27,761 My legs are made of oak. 161 00:05:27,895 --> 00:05:30,598 I'm using either a king's scepter or a tactical hiking axe. 162 00:05:30,731 --> 00:05:32,132 I'm going with a bejeweled wizard's staff. 163 00:05:32,265 --> 00:05:33,701 Oh! Why? 164 00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:35,769 For upstaging me with sorcerer's items! 165 00:05:35,903 --> 00:05:37,638 Now I may not go at all. 166 00:05:37,771 --> 00:05:40,073 Meanwhile, Geoff was going to stand up to my mom again 167 00:05:40,207 --> 00:05:41,542 by pretending to be sick. 168 00:05:43,911 --> 00:05:45,012 You coughed. What's happening? 169 00:05:45,145 --> 00:05:47,681 Nothing. I-I just have this cough, I guess. 170 00:05:49,116 --> 00:05:50,751 Which I guess you just heard. 171 00:05:51,419 --> 00:05:52,620 There it was again. 172 00:05:52,753 --> 00:05:54,488 Geoffrey, you get married in less than 23 hours. 173 00:05:54,622 --> 00:05:56,223 You cannot be sick. 174 00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:58,692 Oh, no! You don't think we may have to delay the wedding, do you? 175 00:05:58,826 --> 00:05:59,993 That would be awful, but it's your call, 176 00:06:00,127 --> 00:06:01,128 and definitely the right one. 177 00:06:01,261 --> 00:06:02,996 Take three cherry drops, two menthol, 178 00:06:03,130 --> 00:06:04,865 and one of these weird European ones 179 00:06:04,998 --> 00:06:06,934 that taste like a yodeler's armpit. 180 00:06:07,067 --> 00:06:08,902 I think it might be more serious than just a cough. 181 00:06:09,036 --> 00:06:10,604 What are your symptoms, Geoffrey? 182 00:06:10,738 --> 00:06:12,406 Because all you need to be is upright 183 00:06:12,540 --> 00:06:13,874 and able to mumble, "I do." 184 00:06:14,007 --> 00:06:15,208 Well, I'm dizzy. 185 00:06:15,342 --> 00:06:17,978 My tummy's bothering me, but it's also my head. 186 00:06:18,111 --> 00:06:19,480 My eyeballs are hot. 187 00:06:19,613 --> 00:06:20,914 My teeth are cold. 188 00:06:21,048 --> 00:06:23,717 And is this a thing? My tongue, it's expanding. 189 00:06:23,851 --> 00:06:26,353 Loog, ith happenink light mow! 190 00:06:26,487 --> 00:06:27,555 Smart. Call off the wedding. 191 00:06:27,688 --> 00:06:30,123 I'm not calling off 192 00:06:30,257 --> 00:06:32,059 Get me all the doctors! 193 00:06:32,192 --> 00:06:34,562 Doctors? W-We don't need to bring medical professionals into this. 194 00:06:34,695 --> 00:06:36,964 We are gonna poke, prod, and check your fluids, 195 00:06:37,097 --> 00:06:39,366 and if all goes well, smash you together good as new! 196 00:06:39,500 --> 00:06:40,768 Adam! Barry! 197 00:06:40,901 --> 00:06:42,770 Is it time for the wedding? I'm not showering. 198 00:06:42,903 --> 00:06:44,838 I've thought about it, and I no longer want 199 00:06:44,972 --> 00:06:46,640 the honor of being the ring bearer. 200 00:06:46,774 --> 00:06:48,241 Mostly 'cause I lost that tiny pillow. 201 00:06:48,375 --> 00:06:50,210 Nothing to be alarmed about, but I'm taking Geoffrey 202 00:06:50,343 --> 00:06:52,846 to every physician in the Philadelphia area. 203 00:06:52,980 --> 00:06:55,248 Sounds right. How does that concern us? 204 00:06:55,382 --> 00:06:57,217 Since I'll be busy with Geoff, it means you boys 205 00:06:57,350 --> 00:07:00,020 need to take Erica to our scheduled Mother-Daughter Spa Day. 206 00:07:00,153 --> 00:07:01,755 Spa day? That's girl stuff. 207 00:07:01,889 --> 00:07:04,424 Yeah, do these rugged hands look like 208 00:07:04,558 --> 00:07:06,694 they would ever take part in whatever feminine hijinks 209 00:07:06,827 --> 00:07:09,262 goes on in that building that was clearly a Taco Bell once? 210 00:07:09,396 --> 00:07:11,899 I'm with Barry. No Taco Bell toes. 211 00:07:12,032 --> 00:07:13,366 You'll get a pedicure, a facial, 212 00:07:13,501 --> 00:07:15,035 and a hot-stone massage. 213 00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:18,205 And make sure that Erica gets the stress relief she so desperately needs! 214 00:07:18,338 --> 00:07:19,473 Here I go, I guess! 215 00:07:19,607 --> 00:07:21,575 Great. Now we have to be pampered. 216 00:07:21,709 --> 00:07:23,143 Weddings are so challenging 217 00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:24,512 for the brothers of the bride. 218 00:07:24,645 --> 00:07:26,246 As we set off to relax with Erica, 219 00:07:26,379 --> 00:07:28,181 Geoff was about to do anything but. 220 00:07:28,315 --> 00:07:29,583 This boy is not well. 221 00:07:29,717 --> 00:07:31,284 Drain him, scan him, and scrape him, 222 00:07:31,418 --> 00:07:33,286 mouth to exit. Leave nothing out. 223 00:07:33,420 --> 00:07:35,288 You can leave the exit out! M-My exit is perfect! 224 00:07:35,422 --> 00:07:36,724 N-Not that I examine it! 225 00:07:36,857 --> 00:07:37,791 I mean, it... It does its job. 226 00:07:37,925 --> 00:07:39,226 Relax. 227 00:07:39,359 --> 00:07:40,628 Let's explore. 228 00:07:40,761 --> 00:07:43,230 As Geoff did anything but relax, 229 00:07:43,363 --> 00:07:45,032 that's all we were doing. 230 00:07:45,165 --> 00:07:47,801 Robes? I don't do well in loosely-bound clothing. 231 00:07:47,935 --> 00:07:50,638 I'm a magnet for ill-timed breezes and errant doorknobs. 232 00:07:50,771 --> 00:07:53,273 Love your body, Adam. I love mine. 233 00:07:53,406 --> 00:07:54,508 It's why I don't use the belt. 234 00:07:54,642 --> 00:07:55,809 Well, you should. 235 00:07:55,943 --> 00:07:57,410 I'm already freaking out about this wedding. 236 00:07:57,545 --> 00:07:59,279 There can't be more for me to unsee. 237 00:07:59,412 --> 00:08:00,914 What's her problem? Who am I? 238 00:08:01,048 --> 00:08:02,482 The guy who wants to know her? 239 00:08:02,616 --> 00:08:04,652 Oh, my God, you two dopes are so lucky. 240 00:08:04,785 --> 00:08:06,186 No one will ever marry you. 241 00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:07,821 Oh, no, thank you! 242 00:08:07,955 --> 00:08:09,122 I don't like it when people touch my... 243 00:08:09,256 --> 00:08:11,892 F... Hachi machi! Ooh, please do not stop 244 00:08:12,025 --> 00:08:13,661 until you are legally mandated to. 245 00:08:13,794 --> 00:08:16,764 And so, our very different journeys began. 246 00:08:16,897 --> 00:08:19,299 As we found ourselves in a state of deep relaxation... 247 00:08:19,432 --> 00:08:20,834 Oh, yeah. 248 00:08:20,968 --> 00:08:22,502 Yeah, really get in there. 249 00:08:22,636 --> 00:08:24,772 ...Geoff, on the other hand, did not. 250 00:08:24,905 --> 00:08:26,273 Please don't make me go in there! Please! 251 00:08:26,406 --> 00:08:28,976 Oh, man. That is cool. 252 00:08:29,109 --> 00:08:31,444 Uncool! Shouldn't I be wearing a lead vest? 253 00:08:33,246 --> 00:08:34,447 Do hot stones hurt? 254 00:08:34,582 --> 00:08:35,649 Do spinal taps hurt? 255 00:08:36,650 --> 00:08:38,118 Ooh. 256 00:08:38,251 --> 00:08:39,219 Ohh! 257 00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:41,254 Ooh! 258 00:08:41,388 --> 00:08:42,322 Aah! 259 00:08:42,455 --> 00:08:43,791 Today was so nice. 260 00:08:43,924 --> 00:08:45,358 Thank you guys so much for coming with me. 261 00:08:45,492 --> 00:08:47,127 I had a great time. This was amazing. 262 00:08:47,260 --> 00:08:48,629 Wait. Are you guys crying? 263 00:08:48,762 --> 00:08:51,699 All these luxurious treatments have opened up things in me. 264 00:08:51,832 --> 00:08:53,300 I know. I'm examining my life 265 00:08:53,433 --> 00:08:54,868 in ways I never have before. 266 00:08:55,002 --> 00:08:57,470 I'm just so happy that you're marrying Geoff. 267 00:08:57,605 --> 00:08:59,106 It's just so beautiful. 268 00:08:59,239 --> 00:09:00,741 It really is. For the first time, 269 00:09:00,874 --> 00:09:03,310 my pores and my heart are open. 270 00:09:03,443 --> 00:09:05,278 You're marrying my best friend. Oh. 271 00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:08,816 I would go over there, but it's just too far. 272 00:09:08,949 --> 00:09:10,183 While the spa made us right, 273 00:09:10,317 --> 00:09:12,152 the doctor couldn't find anything wrong. 274 00:09:12,285 --> 00:09:14,021 We've run every test imaginable, son. 275 00:09:14,154 --> 00:09:17,190 I mean, some not in the least bit routine for a man of your age. 276 00:09:17,324 --> 00:09:19,126 The mammogram did give me pause. 277 00:09:19,259 --> 00:09:21,194 I can't find anything wrong with you. 278 00:09:21,328 --> 00:09:23,096 Well, then there has obviously been an error. 279 00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:24,364 Geoff, back in the tube. 280 00:09:24,497 --> 00:09:26,800 No, don't make me go back in that mean robot's belly! 281 00:09:26,934 --> 00:09:28,902 Have you been feeling any stress recently? 282 00:09:29,036 --> 00:09:30,904 A little. Got a wedding coming up. 283 00:09:33,040 --> 00:09:34,507 I have a diagnosis... 284 00:09:34,642 --> 00:09:36,977 A classic case of cold feet. 285 00:09:37,110 --> 00:09:39,012 Impossible. Geoff loves Erica. 286 00:09:39,146 --> 00:09:40,714 All he wants to do is marry her. 287 00:09:40,848 --> 00:09:43,416 It's too bad that Dr. Cold Hands here couldn't help me. 288 00:09:43,550 --> 00:09:46,920 Guess I'll have to go tell Erica the bad news... 289 00:09:47,054 --> 00:09:48,922 We'll have to indefinitely postpone. 290 00:09:49,056 --> 00:09:51,825 And that's when my mom made a diagnosis of her own... 291 00:09:51,959 --> 00:09:54,061 Geoff was full of 292 00:09:56,163 --> 00:09:57,397 After being forced by our mom 293 00:09:57,530 --> 00:09:59,399 into a pre-wedding day of relaxation, 294 00:09:59,532 --> 00:10:01,334 my siblings and I were riding high. 295 00:10:01,468 --> 00:10:03,203 Spas are the best! 296 00:10:03,336 --> 00:10:05,673 Who knew my skin, nails, and brows 297 00:10:05,806 --> 00:10:07,240 could look as perfect as the rest of me? 298 00:10:07,374 --> 00:10:09,609 Lately I've been feeling crazy with all this wedding stuff, 299 00:10:09,743 --> 00:10:11,912 so I'm really happy that we got to do this spa thing together, 300 00:10:12,045 --> 00:10:13,113 the three of us. 301 00:10:13,246 --> 00:10:15,215 Sis, we're the lucky ones. 302 00:10:15,348 --> 00:10:17,651 We got several uninterrupted hours with the bride! 303 00:10:17,785 --> 00:10:19,787 I don't see why we shouldn't do this every weekend. 304 00:10:19,920 --> 00:10:21,454 We're spa siblings now. 305 00:10:21,588 --> 00:10:23,456 Spa siblings? I love it. 306 00:10:24,925 --> 00:10:26,927 Is she the best? 307 00:10:27,060 --> 00:10:29,596 I feel like she's the best, and we've taken it for granted our entire lives. 308 00:10:29,730 --> 00:10:31,064 Definitely. We gotta do something 309 00:10:31,198 --> 00:10:32,800 to keep her in a good head space this weekend. 310 00:10:32,933 --> 00:10:35,435 What if we made her a batch of that cucumber water from the spa? 311 00:10:35,568 --> 00:10:38,571 Yes! To the crisper drawer! 312 00:10:38,706 --> 00:10:42,575 Beverly, for the, uh, ceremonial smashing of the glass, 313 00:10:42,710 --> 00:10:45,645 will a liturgical broom and dustpan be provided, 314 00:10:45,779 --> 00:10:47,781 or is the one from my garage okay? 315 00:10:47,915 --> 00:10:50,617 Forget the wasteful ancient traditions of my people! 316 00:10:50,751 --> 00:10:51,819 We got a bigger problem. 317 00:10:51,952 --> 00:10:53,887 The groom is the picture of health. 318 00:10:54,021 --> 00:10:55,055 Well, that sounds like good news 319 00:10:55,188 --> 00:10:56,724 for a young man about to be wed. 320 00:10:56,857 --> 00:10:59,827 It's not. The doctor says he's got a raging case of the yips. 321 00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:01,795 Ooh. Yeah, that burns. 322 00:11:01,929 --> 00:11:04,031 No! It means he's got cold feet. 323 00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:07,267 Oh, my. And as the terrifying mother of the bride, 324 00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:09,837 I trust that you're gonna give him the space and time he needs 325 00:11:09,970 --> 00:11:11,071 to come to his senses? 326 00:11:11,204 --> 00:11:13,140 I am gonna bring so much pain, 327 00:11:13,273 --> 00:11:14,875 he'll need a second epidural after the one 328 00:11:15,008 --> 00:11:16,309 I forced him to get earlier. 329 00:11:16,443 --> 00:11:19,679 I may be but a humble deacon masking as a rabbi 330 00:11:19,813 --> 00:11:21,681 for the wedding of my boss' daughter, 331 00:11:21,815 --> 00:11:25,118 but that is a bad idea. 332 00:11:25,252 --> 00:11:27,487 It could permanently affect your relationship with Erica. 333 00:11:27,620 --> 00:11:29,056 Erica. Crap! 334 00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:30,557 I forgot she was even part of this! 335 00:11:32,425 --> 00:11:33,560 You thinking what I'm thinking? 336 00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:35,628 We wallop Geoff with these cukes and picks? 337 00:11:35,763 --> 00:11:37,030 It's time the brothers Goldberg 338 00:11:37,164 --> 00:11:38,932 had a little chat with the groom. 339 00:11:39,066 --> 00:11:42,269 And so, Barry and I set out to defend our spa sibling 340 00:11:42,402 --> 00:11:44,404 by giving Geoff a little special treatment of his own. 341 00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:45,906 Nice style choice, fellas. 342 00:11:46,039 --> 00:11:47,707 Barry, you look like David Bowie 343 00:11:47,841 --> 00:11:49,309 in his business-chic years, and, Adam, 344 00:11:49,442 --> 00:11:51,144 you look like Meryl Streep in Kramer vs. Kramer. 345 00:11:51,278 --> 00:11:53,080 That is so kind. 346 00:11:53,213 --> 00:11:55,182 She had so much gravitas and... 347 00:11:55,315 --> 00:11:57,150 And we're tough guys! That's right. 348 00:11:57,284 --> 00:11:59,753 We exude danger, and you're terrified of us 349 00:11:59,887 --> 00:12:01,054 and the lines we might cross. 350 00:12:01,188 --> 00:12:02,455 The only thing I'm terrified about 351 00:12:02,589 --> 00:12:04,157 is that I haven't offered you a lemonade. 352 00:12:04,291 --> 00:12:05,458 Will you guys get on in here? 353 00:12:05,592 --> 00:12:06,693 Don't tell me what to do. 354 00:12:06,827 --> 00:12:09,196 I tell you what to do 'cause I'm bad cop. 355 00:12:09,329 --> 00:12:11,031 And you know what? I'm also bad cop! 356 00:12:11,164 --> 00:12:12,866 Dude, we can't both be bad cop. 357 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:14,201 It's twice as intense. 358 00:12:14,334 --> 00:12:15,869 Which gives him no reason to trust us. 359 00:12:16,003 --> 00:12:17,905 Who are you, good bad cop? 360 00:12:18,038 --> 00:12:19,539 Did you guys need something, or... 361 00:12:19,672 --> 00:12:21,174 You say nothing! Talk and die! 362 00:12:22,509 --> 00:12:24,111 Whoa! 363 00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:25,712 Tell us why you don't wanna marry Erica! 364 00:12:25,846 --> 00:12:27,180 What? Who said that? 365 00:12:27,314 --> 00:12:29,382 Tell us why you're gonna smash our sister's delicate heart 366 00:12:29,516 --> 00:12:30,583 into a million tiny pieces! 367 00:12:32,085 --> 00:12:34,721 Barry? Adam? What's going on? 368 00:12:34,855 --> 00:12:37,424 Your brothers are trying to intimidate me for some reason. 369 00:12:37,557 --> 00:12:38,959 I hate that you have to learn it this way, 370 00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:41,028 but since we are spa siblings, you must know... 371 00:12:41,161 --> 00:12:42,429 Geoff, he doesn't wanna marry you. 372 00:12:42,562 --> 00:12:44,364 And we'll take any number of household items 373 00:12:44,497 --> 00:12:45,565 to do harm upon him. 374 00:12:45,698 --> 00:12:47,234 Because spa siblings. 375 00:12:47,367 --> 00:12:49,602 I do wanna marry Erica, and what the hell is a spa sibling? 376 00:12:49,736 --> 00:12:52,940 Aw, did you guys threaten my fiance on my behalf? 377 00:12:53,073 --> 00:12:54,374 Wow, we really did bond today. 378 00:12:54,507 --> 00:12:57,177 So hard. Family finally means something to me. 379 00:12:57,310 --> 00:12:59,112 And Geoff doesn't have cold feet. 380 00:12:59,246 --> 00:13:01,214 He's just faking sick to get out of the wedding. 381 00:13:01,348 --> 00:13:03,616 If you wanna get married, why are you trying to get out of it? 382 00:13:03,750 --> 00:13:06,019 Because Mom planned the most over-the-top ceremony 383 00:13:06,153 --> 00:13:07,420 of all time. 384 00:13:07,554 --> 00:13:08,822 Geoff was just trying to give me what I want. 385 00:13:08,956 --> 00:13:10,390 Aww. He cherishes you. 386 00:13:10,523 --> 00:13:11,624 I really do. 387 00:13:11,758 --> 00:13:13,593 I know that only moments ago, we were planning 388 00:13:13,726 --> 00:13:15,195 on committing violence upon you, 389 00:13:15,328 --> 00:13:16,964 but now all that rage has turned into 390 00:13:17,097 --> 00:13:17,931 a mushy clump of love. 391 00:13:18,065 --> 00:13:19,666 We're all spa siblings! 392 00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:21,601 I guess since this whole sick thing didn't work out, 393 00:13:21,734 --> 00:13:23,136 there's only one thing left to do. 394 00:13:23,270 --> 00:13:24,838 Hide in the attic like I did when my dad tried 395 00:13:24,972 --> 00:13:26,306 to make the family walk the Freedom Trail? 396 00:13:26,439 --> 00:13:27,507 It's like a hundred miles long. 397 00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:29,542 No. It's my wedding. 398 00:13:29,676 --> 00:13:30,944 I gotta stand up to my mom. 399 00:13:31,078 --> 00:13:32,379 That's not gonna end well. 400 00:13:32,512 --> 00:13:33,680 Probably not. But she's not gonna do it alone. 401 00:13:33,813 --> 00:13:35,415 We're a team. 402 00:13:35,548 --> 00:13:36,950 While our feelings toward Geoff had warmed, 403 00:13:37,084 --> 00:13:38,618 it seemed the weather had not. 404 00:13:38,751 --> 00:13:40,988 What do you mean all flights are canceled? 405 00:13:41,121 --> 00:13:43,123 Baruch ata adonai... 406 00:13:43,256 --> 00:13:45,458 Aunt Ida, just, uh, hand the phone 407 00:13:45,592 --> 00:13:47,527 to the witch typing loudly in the background. 408 00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:49,762 Melech ha-olam... 409 00:13:49,897 --> 00:13:52,265 Is that the proper amount of guilt and phlegm? 410 00:13:52,399 --> 00:13:54,401 I don't care what the FAA says, 411 00:13:54,534 --> 00:13:57,604 the BEV says open all the gates! 412 00:13:57,737 --> 00:13:59,973 No one's ever been killed by a little ice. 413 00:14:00,107 --> 00:14:02,976 Actually, Grandfather Antoine met the Lord 414 00:14:03,110 --> 00:14:06,279 while grabbing the Ottawa Journal on our driveway sleet. 415 00:14:06,413 --> 00:14:09,249 Olav ha-sholom, Pappy Brown. 416 00:14:09,382 --> 00:14:12,019 Don't you put me on hold... D... Dammit! 417 00:14:12,152 --> 00:14:13,320 Beverly, we have big problems. 418 00:14:14,521 --> 00:14:16,623 Cousin Hertzel is stuck in Newark! 419 00:14:16,756 --> 00:14:18,591 And I heard that Geoffrey wasn't feeling well 420 00:14:18,725 --> 00:14:22,295 from multiple calls from our panicked insurance agent. 421 00:14:22,429 --> 00:14:25,098 Relax, Linda, I made sure he had every tube, 422 00:14:25,232 --> 00:14:26,699 needle, and camera jabbed into him. 423 00:14:26,833 --> 00:14:28,801 And do you know what the diagnosis was? Cold feet. 424 00:14:28,936 --> 00:14:30,303 Like frostbite? 425 00:14:30,437 --> 00:14:34,507 Oh, Lou's side does have a history of terrible circulation. 426 00:14:34,641 --> 00:14:36,843 And your whole family are Ferrignos? 427 00:14:36,977 --> 00:14:38,211 Oh, my God! You're all so stressed 428 00:14:38,345 --> 00:14:40,213 and miserable. It's hilarious. 429 00:14:40,347 --> 00:14:42,916 Everyone stop! I don't have cold feet! 430 00:14:43,050 --> 00:14:45,318 Yes! So my plan to not kill you was the right one. 431 00:14:45,452 --> 00:14:47,287 We need to talk about the wedding. 432 00:14:47,420 --> 00:14:48,855 Erica, believe me, Mama will make sure 433 00:14:48,989 --> 00:14:50,523 that everything goes as planned. 434 00:14:50,657 --> 00:14:52,892 That's just the thing... Hey! 435 00:14:53,026 --> 00:14:56,629 The storm is back and tracking right into us, folks. 436 00:14:56,763 --> 00:14:59,699 Please, cancel those plans and stay inside. 437 00:14:59,832 --> 00:15:02,002 No! I diverted you once, Mother Nature, and I'll do it again. 438 00:15:02,135 --> 00:15:04,804 Move, wretched blizzard! 439 00:15:04,938 --> 00:15:06,739 Not if my sister had anything to do with it. 440 00:15:06,873 --> 00:15:07,840 Come on, storm buddy. 441 00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:10,843 Ice us! Ice us but good! 442 00:15:10,978 --> 00:15:13,546 The temperature is dropping incredibly fast. 443 00:15:13,680 --> 00:15:15,448 They have a concerning amount of confidence 444 00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:17,150 in their sway on nature. 445 00:15:17,284 --> 00:15:19,519 Erica, you're moving the storm the wrong way! 446 00:15:19,652 --> 00:15:21,621 I'm moving it right where I want it! 447 00:15:21,754 --> 00:15:23,756 Stop! It's for our dream wedding! 448 00:15:23,890 --> 00:15:26,259 This isn't my dream wedding, it's yours! 449 00:15:26,393 --> 00:15:27,727 How dare you. 450 00:15:27,860 --> 00:15:29,896 I have been working non-stop to make everything perfect. 451 00:15:30,030 --> 00:15:31,431 How dare you! 452 00:15:31,564 --> 00:15:33,533 I wanted something simple and sweet, 453 00:15:33,666 --> 00:15:35,168 but you've turned it into a literal circus. 454 00:15:35,302 --> 00:15:36,869 I think I saw a bearded lady. 455 00:15:37,004 --> 00:15:38,371 That may have been my Great Aunt Edna. 456 00:15:38,505 --> 00:15:40,073 She has pituitary issues. 457 00:15:42,209 --> 00:15:44,077 Oh. Well, I hope you're happy, 458 00:15:44,211 --> 00:15:46,113 'cause now it looks like there's not gonna be a wedding. 459 00:15:46,246 --> 00:15:47,981 Of course I'm not happy, Mom. 460 00:15:48,115 --> 00:15:49,716 I can't wait to marry Geoff, 461 00:15:49,849 --> 00:15:52,252 but I just want it to be my wedding and not yours. 462 00:16:01,028 --> 00:16:02,495 Thanks to the weather, 463 00:16:02,629 --> 00:16:04,464 Erica and Geoff's wedding was off. 464 00:16:04,597 --> 00:16:06,066 But an unexpected ice storm... 465 00:16:07,534 --> 00:16:08,801 ...wasn't the only surprise that day. 466 00:16:09,902 --> 00:16:11,304 Are you... 467 00:16:11,438 --> 00:16:14,241 Rock-Pop sensation Richard Marx? 468 00:16:14,374 --> 00:16:15,375 In the smoking-hot flesh. 469 00:16:15,508 --> 00:16:17,144 Not the real Richard Marx. 470 00:16:17,277 --> 00:16:18,811 No, I definitely am the real Richard Marx. 471 00:16:18,945 --> 00:16:20,447 Look at my lustrous hair. 472 00:16:20,580 --> 00:16:22,582 This gorgeous mane sold 10 million albums alone. 473 00:16:22,715 --> 00:16:24,817 And this smile? Another 10. 474 00:16:24,951 --> 00:16:28,055 If you're the real Richard Marx, then how big is a Grammy? 475 00:16:28,188 --> 00:16:30,557 Well, I don't think you have to be Richard Marx to know that, but... 476 00:16:30,690 --> 00:16:32,459 About yea big. It is him. 477 00:16:32,592 --> 00:16:34,027 The man who wrote Don't Mean Nothin' 478 00:16:34,161 --> 00:16:35,795 about the perils of the entertainment business. 479 00:16:35,928 --> 00:16:37,630 Serious question, who's that for? 480 00:16:37,764 --> 00:16:40,333 Look, your mother hired me to play a wedding, but the roads are closed, 481 00:16:40,467 --> 00:16:41,934 so I wanted to return her check. 482 00:16:43,470 --> 00:16:46,539 Richard Marx is a class act. 483 00:16:46,673 --> 00:16:48,641 It's true. Global superstardom 484 00:16:48,775 --> 00:16:51,411 and endless wealth haven't changed me. 485 00:16:51,544 --> 00:16:54,281 Anyway, it's really bad out here. Could I come in? 486 00:16:54,414 --> 00:16:56,383 Although I do feel like I know you intimately 487 00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:57,984 because of your emotional lyrics, 488 00:16:58,118 --> 00:16:59,386 you're still a stranger. 489 00:16:59,519 --> 00:17:00,720 Dad! What? 490 00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:02,422 Can Richard Marx come in? No! 491 00:17:02,555 --> 00:17:04,291 But I'm Richard Marx. 492 00:17:04,424 --> 00:17:06,859 He's always grumpy. Just don't set up in front of the TV. 493 00:17:06,993 --> 00:17:09,196 I've written a ton of power ballads. You, uh, wanna hear 'em? 494 00:17:09,329 --> 00:17:10,797 Not even a little. 495 00:17:10,930 --> 00:17:12,865 As we welcomed in a global pop star, 496 00:17:12,999 --> 00:17:14,534 my mom had to face her own music. 497 00:17:14,667 --> 00:17:15,635 Hey. 498 00:17:15,768 --> 00:17:17,404 Hey. Errm. 499 00:17:17,537 --> 00:17:19,005 I want to tell you something. 500 00:17:19,139 --> 00:17:20,507 What? Did one of the unicorns 501 00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:21,874 accidentally gouge a fire-eater? 502 00:17:22,675 --> 00:17:23,843 I am sorry. 503 00:17:25,445 --> 00:17:28,881 I wanted to throw you a wedding as big as the love I have for you 504 00:17:30,183 --> 00:17:31,684 instead of the one you really wanted. 505 00:17:31,818 --> 00:17:35,388 Mom, I tried to tell you, the wedding of my dreams 506 00:17:35,522 --> 00:17:37,490 just needs this guy that I'm crazy about 507 00:17:37,624 --> 00:17:39,192 and the people that we love around us. 508 00:17:39,326 --> 00:17:40,293 Nothing more. 509 00:17:40,427 --> 00:17:41,928 I see that now. 510 00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:43,863 Um, well, come on. 511 00:17:43,996 --> 00:17:45,998 I want to show you something. 512 00:17:46,133 --> 00:17:48,501 Oh, you might want to put on your dress and tux. 513 00:17:53,340 --> 00:17:56,643 And so, in the house she grew up in, 514 00:17:56,776 --> 00:17:59,246 surrounded by all the people she loved, 515 00:17:59,379 --> 00:18:03,116 what was the biggest wedding in Jenkintown history 516 00:18:03,250 --> 00:18:04,584 became the smallest. 517 00:18:04,717 --> 00:18:07,487 And it was just what Erica wanted. 518 00:18:10,990 --> 00:18:13,126 Oh, my God. This is incredible. 519 00:18:13,260 --> 00:18:14,627 My little peanut. 520 00:18:14,761 --> 00:18:17,530 Yeah, well, your brothers took care of most of it. 521 00:18:17,664 --> 00:18:19,632 For you, we'd do anything. 522 00:18:21,701 --> 00:18:24,604 We don't say it enough, but we love you, sis. 523 00:18:24,737 --> 00:18:25,705 So much. 524 00:18:25,838 --> 00:18:27,073 That's so sweet. 525 00:18:27,207 --> 00:18:29,309 And holy crap. Is that Richard Marx? 526 00:18:29,442 --> 00:18:31,578 Damn right it is. Hello. 527 00:18:31,711 --> 00:18:34,080 He's the only thing I kept from the original celebration. 528 00:18:34,214 --> 00:18:35,047 Is it okay? 529 00:18:35,182 --> 00:18:37,049 Mom, this is perfect. 530 00:18:37,184 --> 00:18:38,351 Thank you. 531 00:18:42,355 --> 00:18:43,456 Sweetheart. 532 00:18:50,029 --> 00:18:51,264 You ready? 533 00:18:51,398 --> 00:18:54,100 I've never been more ready for anything in my life. 534 00:18:54,234 --> 00:18:56,703 So, under the glow of our candlelit living room, 535 00:18:56,836 --> 00:18:59,506 Erica and Geoff, high school sweethearts, 536 00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:00,640 got hitched. 537 00:19:02,542 --> 00:19:04,911 Sometimes, the right guy has always been there, 538 00:19:05,044 --> 00:19:08,147 carrying a cello and unable to eat Thai food. 539 00:19:09,282 --> 00:19:12,485 But I love your kindness, your compassion, 540 00:19:12,619 --> 00:19:16,789 your endless patience, and your love. 541 00:19:16,923 --> 00:19:19,959 It wasn't what they had planned. 542 00:19:20,092 --> 00:19:24,331 You've never washed a dish, nor accepted any criticism 543 00:19:24,464 --> 00:19:25,665 in the gentle way I intended. 544 00:19:27,267 --> 00:19:29,302 But you've also never backed down from a fight 545 00:19:29,436 --> 00:19:30,670 when you knew it was the right thing to do. 546 00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:34,173 I love your strength. 547 00:19:34,307 --> 00:19:35,875 I love your courage. 548 00:19:36,008 --> 00:19:37,710 I even love your family. 549 00:19:39,379 --> 00:19:41,748 But mostly, I love you. 550 00:19:47,153 --> 00:19:50,290 But it turned out to be the perfect night 551 00:19:50,423 --> 00:19:52,792 for the perfect couple. 552 00:19:52,925 --> 00:19:55,127 By the power vested in me, 553 00:19:55,262 --> 00:19:57,697 by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, 554 00:19:57,830 --> 00:19:59,699 I pronounce you man and wife. 555 00:19:59,832 --> 00:20:00,933 You may kiss the bride. 556 00:20:01,067 --> 00:20:03,202 ♪ Wherever you go 557 00:20:03,336 --> 00:20:06,205 ♪ Whatever you do 558 00:20:06,339 --> 00:20:11,544 ♪ I will be right here waiting for you 559 00:20:11,678 --> 00:20:14,381 ♪ Whatever it takes 560 00:20:14,514 --> 00:20:17,550 ♪ Or how my heart breaks... 561 00:20:17,684 --> 00:20:19,185 Geoff was right. 562 00:20:19,319 --> 00:20:22,389 We all felt the love in the house that night 563 00:20:22,522 --> 00:20:24,957 as our families joined to become one. 564 00:20:27,093 --> 00:20:28,395 It was a dream come true. 565 00:20:28,528 --> 00:20:31,731 ♪ You've got me going crazy... 566 00:20:31,864 --> 00:20:33,666 For Erica and Geoff, 567 00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:37,770 for my parents, for all of us. 568 00:20:37,904 --> 00:20:39,339 ♪ I will be right here waiting for you ♪ 569 00:20:39,472 --> 00:20:41,541 My baby's married! 570 00:20:52,218 --> 00:20:54,521 Excuse me. I was wondering if I could maybe get my check back now? 571 00:20:54,654 --> 00:20:56,423 Your check for what exactly, Richard Marx? 572 00:20:56,556 --> 00:20:58,257 For my performance. 573 00:20:58,391 --> 00:20:59,426 I kinda nailed it. 574 00:20:59,559 --> 00:21:01,227 Oh, my. A certain platinum artist 575 00:21:01,361 --> 00:21:03,195 is very big for his britches. 576 00:21:03,330 --> 00:21:04,464 Well, I'll tell you what. 577 00:21:04,597 --> 00:21:05,798 I'm gonna write down a number, 578 00:21:05,932 --> 00:21:08,568 and you can either take it or leave it. 579 00:21:09,902 --> 00:21:11,270 That is not a number. 580 00:21:11,404 --> 00:21:12,739 And why would I do that to myself? 581 00:21:12,872 --> 00:21:14,941 Oh, boo-hoo. Write a sad song about it. 582 00:21:15,074 --> 00:21:17,109 Oh, I will! And it'll be a number-one smash hit! 583 00:21:17,243 --> 00:21:18,244 There you go. 584 00:21:18,378 --> 00:21:19,512 And I'm taking this! 585 00:21:20,613 --> 00:21:22,715 Beautiful hair. You, too.