1 00:00:01,535 --> 00:00:03,071 ADULT ADAM: Ah, the Halloween couple's costume! 2 00:00:03,137 --> 00:00:05,773 From Alien vs. Predator to Little Shop of Horrors, 3 00:00:05,839 --> 00:00:09,277 back in the day, dressing up was always better in pairs... 4 00:00:09,343 --> 00:00:10,911 Well, for everyone except Erica. 5 00:00:10,978 --> 00:00:12,946 Boom! This year, you and me are going 6 00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:14,515 as the white-hot hit-making duo, 7 00:00:14,582 --> 00:00:16,150 Daryl Hall and John Oates! 8 00:00:16,950 --> 00:00:18,252 No and no. 9 00:00:18,319 --> 00:00:19,520 I don't get it either. 10 00:00:19,587 --> 00:00:21,622 In my day, there were only two costumes, 11 00:00:21,689 --> 00:00:23,224 a ghost and a witch. 12 00:00:23,291 --> 00:00:24,892 Please, Erica! 13 00:00:24,958 --> 00:00:27,228 You know it's always been my dream to go to the Halloween dance 14 00:00:27,295 --> 00:00:28,596 in a bad-ass couple's costume 15 00:00:28,662 --> 00:00:30,098 based on clever wordplay! 16 00:00:30,164 --> 00:00:31,232 Geoff, I love you. 17 00:00:31,299 --> 00:00:33,301 But your dream is beyond embarrassing. 18 00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:35,169 I knew you'd be resistant and nasty, 19 00:00:35,236 --> 00:00:38,172 which is why I came up with some backups so good you can't possibly say no! 20 00:00:38,239 --> 00:00:39,273 Terrific! 21 00:00:39,340 --> 00:00:41,575 I always enjoy a good presentation! 22 00:00:41,642 --> 00:00:43,277 Look, we can be Tim Burton's best movie! 23 00:00:43,344 --> 00:00:45,546 Beetlejuice! I'm the beetle. You're the juice. 24 00:00:45,613 --> 00:00:46,747 Falcon Crest. 25 00:00:46,814 --> 00:00:48,082 Doctor. J. 26 00:00:48,149 --> 00:00:49,150 John. Candy. 27 00:00:49,217 --> 00:00:50,551 LEGO my EGGO. 28 00:00:50,618 --> 00:00:51,952 Corn. Dog. 29 00:00:52,019 --> 00:00:54,588 Or we circle back to Daryl Hall and John Oates! 30 00:00:54,655 --> 00:00:55,656 Comments? 31 00:00:55,723 --> 00:00:57,125 What's happening right now? 32 00:00:57,191 --> 00:00:58,826 Good question, Pops. 33 00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:01,028 Trust me, this will make sense if you just wear the cough drops. 34 00:01:01,095 --> 00:01:04,598 Geoff, listen to me. I am not going to some corny high-school Halloween dance. 35 00:01:04,665 --> 00:01:05,733 Fine! But just so you know, 36 00:01:05,799 --> 00:01:07,335 I find it very hurtful that you insist 37 00:01:07,401 --> 00:01:09,203 that my innovative ideas are always embarrassing! 38 00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:11,339 Aah! 39 00:01:11,405 --> 00:01:12,940 * I'm twisted up inside 40 00:01:13,006 --> 00:01:16,377 * But nonetheless I feel the need to say 41 00:01:19,012 --> 00:01:20,481 * I don't know the future 42 00:01:20,548 --> 00:01:24,118 * But the past keeps getting clearer every day * 43 00:01:24,185 --> 00:01:26,554 ADULT ADAM: It was October 23rd, 1980-something, 44 00:01:26,620 --> 00:01:28,922 and I was ready for a Halloween horror marathon 45 00:01:28,989 --> 00:01:30,458 with my girlfriend, Jackie. 46 00:01:30,524 --> 00:01:32,160 Okay, so, I narrowed it down 47 00:01:32,226 --> 00:01:33,861 to these 29 horror movies. 48 00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:35,629 I think all we need is one. 49 00:01:35,696 --> 00:01:37,398 Nightmare on Elm Street. 50 00:01:37,465 --> 00:01:39,500 Yeah, I'm not so sure. 51 00:01:39,567 --> 00:01:42,370 Something about Freddy Krueger really freaks me out. 52 00:01:42,436 --> 00:01:44,205 It could be the face or the claws 53 00:01:44,272 --> 00:01:46,106 or the whole fall-asleep- and-you-die concept. 54 00:01:46,174 --> 00:01:48,342 Oh, don't worry. I'll protect you. 55 00:01:48,409 --> 00:01:49,943 No. That's my job. 56 00:01:50,010 --> 00:01:51,545 And you know my number-one rule... 57 00:01:51,612 --> 00:01:53,147 No scary movies. 58 00:01:53,214 --> 00:01:54,815 That's the thing, it's not scary. 59 00:01:54,882 --> 00:01:57,485 Elm Street is actually a very charming rom-com. 60 00:01:57,551 --> 00:02:00,120 "High school friends are slaughtered in their sleep 61 00:02:00,188 --> 00:02:02,690 "by the predatory monster of their shared nightmares"? 62 00:02:02,756 --> 00:02:04,692 Gah! What's the worst that can happen? 63 00:02:04,758 --> 00:02:07,861 I don't know. Why don't you ask Joyce Dimarco's son Anthony? 64 00:02:07,928 --> 00:02:09,363 He didn't sleep for three years 65 00:02:09,430 --> 00:02:10,731 after watching The Exorcist, 66 00:02:10,798 --> 00:02:12,166 so his body never grew. 67 00:02:12,233 --> 00:02:14,568 Well, now he's a 4'7" adult man 68 00:02:14,635 --> 00:02:17,505 who needs a special stool to use a sink! 69 00:02:17,571 --> 00:02:19,807 Mom, I've slept enough to reach every sink! 70 00:02:19,873 --> 00:02:21,542 I'm old enough to see this movie! 71 00:02:21,609 --> 00:02:23,677 Okay, fine. You wanna rent a scary movie? 72 00:02:23,744 --> 00:02:25,446 Here. An American Tail? 73 00:02:25,513 --> 00:02:26,847 It's bone chilling. 74 00:02:26,914 --> 00:02:29,817 It's about a Russian-Semitic mouse named Fievel Mousekewitz 75 00:02:29,883 --> 00:02:31,585 who emigrates to America. 76 00:02:31,652 --> 00:02:32,686 How is that scary? 77 00:02:32,753 --> 00:02:34,288 Well, he gets separated from his mama. 78 00:02:34,355 --> 00:02:36,089 But don't worry. He finds her again. 79 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:37,591 Ohh! I just ruined the whole thing! 80 00:02:37,658 --> 00:02:39,560 Well, it doesn't matter, 'cause you're gonna love it! 81 00:02:39,627 --> 00:02:42,696 I'm gonna get us some cheesy snacks for my little mouse man. 82 00:02:42,763 --> 00:02:45,266 Don't worry. We'll still get to watch us some Freddy. 83 00:02:45,333 --> 00:02:46,400 Really? How? 84 00:02:46,467 --> 00:02:48,402 I had a feeling your mom would make us go PG, 85 00:02:48,469 --> 00:02:50,638 so I had my parents rent it for us. 86 00:02:50,704 --> 00:02:52,273 Unless you're too scared? 87 00:02:52,340 --> 00:02:53,707 Are you kidding? It's cool. 88 00:02:53,774 --> 00:02:56,310 I mean, how scary can a little claw glove be? 89 00:02:56,377 --> 00:02:57,911 (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS) ADAM: Oh, God! 90 00:02:57,978 --> 00:03:00,113 That claw is really freaking me out, man! 91 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:01,649 Tell me when the claw's off the screen! 92 00:03:01,715 --> 00:03:03,651 Hey, pumpkins! Having fun? 93 00:03:03,717 --> 00:03:05,419 Mmm... Yeah, fun stuff. 94 00:03:05,486 --> 00:03:08,756 Dad, you've gotta see this movie. It's totally terrifying. 95 00:03:08,822 --> 00:03:10,224 That's 'cause it's based on a true story. 96 00:03:10,291 --> 00:03:11,559 Wait, what? 97 00:03:11,625 --> 00:03:12,626 (IMITATING FREDDY KRUEGER) Freddy's coming for you! 98 00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:14,194 You can sleep when you're dead! What? 99 00:03:14,262 --> 00:03:15,796 (NORMAL VOICE) I'm just messing with you. 100 00:03:15,863 --> 00:03:18,499 But the movie is terrifying. Have fun! 101 00:03:18,566 --> 00:03:20,434 ADULT ADAM: It's true. Freddy scared me to my core. 102 00:03:20,501 --> 00:03:21,969 Meanwhile, Geoff was still afraid 103 00:03:22,035 --> 00:03:23,737 he'd never get his couple's costume. 104 00:03:23,804 --> 00:03:26,039 Please, all I'm asking for is five measly minutes 105 00:03:26,106 --> 00:03:27,808 as Daryl Hall and John Oates! 106 00:03:27,875 --> 00:03:30,478 For the millionth time, I'm not going to some lame high-school dance. 107 00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:33,247 But it won't be lame because you make everything cooler. 108 00:03:33,314 --> 00:03:36,884 That's why you're Halls! It's known for its icy-cold penetrating vapor action! 109 00:03:36,950 --> 00:03:38,919 I made a promise the day I graduated 110 00:03:38,986 --> 00:03:40,921 to never return to this hellhole again. 111 00:03:40,988 --> 00:03:42,590 Which reminds me... Get out. 112 00:03:42,656 --> 00:03:44,525 Here? But this is the auxiliary parking lot. 113 00:03:44,592 --> 00:03:45,659 If you wanna bum rides off me, 114 00:03:45,726 --> 00:03:46,960 this is the best you're gonna get. 115 00:03:47,027 --> 00:03:48,762 'Cause the last thing I need is for someone to spot me... 116 00:03:48,829 --> 00:03:51,265 Well, well! If it isn't one of our illustrious alumni, 117 00:03:51,332 --> 00:03:52,833 Erica Goldberg! 118 00:03:52,900 --> 00:03:54,302 Hey, Mr. Glascott. 119 00:03:54,368 --> 00:03:57,104 Um, don't you have your own, like, teacher's spot or something? 120 00:03:57,170 --> 00:03:59,006 I do, but there's always a student parked in it, 121 00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:02,643 so I park here and then wear a pair of comfortable walking shoes. 122 00:04:02,710 --> 00:04:04,177 Cool stuff, very sad, gotta go! 123 00:04:04,244 --> 00:04:05,513 Oh, wait, before you run off, 124 00:04:05,579 --> 00:04:07,481 do you mind coming in and talking to the kids? 125 00:04:07,548 --> 00:04:09,983 It's very inspiring for them to hear a success story 126 00:04:10,050 --> 00:04:11,319 from one of our former students. 127 00:04:11,385 --> 00:04:13,354 I would, but being back here is depressing, 128 00:04:13,421 --> 00:04:14,722 so no way never? 129 00:04:14,788 --> 00:04:17,291 (LAUGHS) That's the sassafras I remember! 130 00:04:17,358 --> 00:04:19,693 Come on, we can walk together! 131 00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:22,696 Young minds, look who it is! Erica Goldberg! 132 00:04:22,763 --> 00:04:24,632 (CHUCKLES) She's here to tell you all about 133 00:04:24,698 --> 00:04:28,168 the magical and exciting chapter after high school! 134 00:04:28,235 --> 00:04:30,270 Well, I went to college in DC... 135 00:04:30,338 --> 00:04:32,706 Ooh! Where the president lives. 136 00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:35,443 And then I dropped out to follow my real dream, 137 00:04:35,509 --> 00:04:36,810 which is being a rock star. 138 00:04:36,877 --> 00:04:39,547 Intriguing. Could you expound on the risks and rewards 139 00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:40,748 of leaving academia behind? 140 00:04:40,814 --> 00:04:42,450 Good Lord, no! 141 00:04:42,516 --> 00:04:44,352 So in your experience, would you say college was a waste of time? 142 00:04:44,418 --> 00:04:46,186 I would say high school was a waste of time. 143 00:04:46,253 --> 00:04:47,555 No, no, no, no, no! I knew it! 144 00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:50,157 The whole American educational system is bogus! 145 00:04:50,223 --> 00:04:52,726 Man, this really turned on me! Please just leave! 146 00:04:52,793 --> 00:04:55,228 You were right, Schwartz. Coming back to school wasn't so bad after all. 147 00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:56,397 (SIGHS) Later, turds! 148 00:04:56,464 --> 00:04:57,898 (CRUNCHES) 149 00:04:57,965 --> 00:04:59,733 She just ate my new apple. 150 00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:02,169 ADULT ADAM: Turns out, going back to the place Erica used to rule 151 00:05:02,235 --> 00:05:04,104 was just the ego boost she needed. 152 00:05:04,171 --> 00:05:07,941 Some days I just wake up and I go, "You know what? I'm gonna do nothing today," 153 00:05:08,008 --> 00:05:09,610 and I go right back to sleep. 154 00:05:09,677 --> 00:05:11,278 You're my hero. 155 00:05:11,345 --> 00:05:14,014 Yep, that fateful day, she was back to being the Queen of Cool. 156 00:05:14,081 --> 00:05:15,383 This bad boy stuck again? Mmm-hmm. 157 00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:18,218 Some things never change. 158 00:05:18,285 --> 00:05:20,721 Wow! You're like the Fonz but hot! 159 00:05:20,788 --> 00:05:22,623 Aay! 'Cause Fonzie. 160 00:05:22,690 --> 00:05:24,425 ADULT ADAM: That is, until the Queen of Cool 161 00:05:24,492 --> 00:05:26,727 became the Master of Just Not Leaving. 162 00:05:26,794 --> 00:05:28,429 'Sup! (CHUCKLES) 163 00:05:28,496 --> 00:05:30,030 My dude! 164 00:05:30,097 --> 00:05:31,732 Hey, hang in there, bro! 165 00:05:31,799 --> 00:05:33,767 Like the bangs, random girl! 166 00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:36,870 Ruben Jr., doin' what you do! 167 00:05:36,937 --> 00:05:39,773 Wait, I thought that girl graduated? That's 'cause she did. 168 00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:43,377 ADULT ADAM: While Erica was overstaying her welcome, I was over-caffeinating. 169 00:05:43,444 --> 00:05:45,112 Who's up for Pancake Dippers? 170 00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:47,881 Whoa-whoa! Take off that striped Freddy sweater right now! 171 00:05:47,948 --> 00:05:50,751 Oh, dammit. Are you strung out on Jolt Cola again? 172 00:05:50,818 --> 00:05:51,985 Gimme the can. No, no, no, no! 173 00:05:52,052 --> 00:05:53,120 I need my wakey juice! 174 00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:54,522 My God, you look schluffy. 175 00:05:54,588 --> 00:05:56,457 A Mama can always tell. 176 00:05:56,524 --> 00:05:58,592 What's going on with you? Okay, fine! 177 00:05:58,659 --> 00:06:01,194 I'm too exhausted to mount a defense! 178 00:06:01,261 --> 00:06:03,731 I watched Nightmare on Elm Street at Jackie's house. 179 00:06:03,797 --> 00:06:05,365 What? Where were Vinny and Lynn? 180 00:06:05,433 --> 00:06:06,967 They rented it for us. 181 00:06:07,034 --> 00:06:09,903 Knowing full well that it's a terrifying movie about Fredward Kroeger? 182 00:06:09,970 --> 00:06:12,806 Yes! 'Cause they trust Jackie and respect her opinion 183 00:06:12,873 --> 00:06:15,075 'cause she's an adult who can make her own decisions. 184 00:06:15,142 --> 00:06:17,945 Sweet God! What else happens in this lawless house 185 00:06:18,011 --> 00:06:20,080 built on the trust of children? Nothing! 186 00:06:20,147 --> 00:06:22,450 Vin and Lynn are cool and thoughtful 187 00:06:22,516 --> 00:06:23,984 and political and go to protests... 188 00:06:24,051 --> 00:06:26,153 Whoa, whoa, wait, they're hippies? 189 00:06:26,219 --> 00:06:27,621 Oh, no! Don't mix in, too! 190 00:06:27,688 --> 00:06:29,089 Just go back to napping! 191 00:06:29,156 --> 00:06:32,660 You never told me that your girlfriend comes from hippie stock! 192 00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:33,894 Oh, no! 193 00:06:33,961 --> 00:06:35,929 Great, now you got your father all riled up. 194 00:06:35,996 --> 00:06:38,298 My God! Why do you hate hippies so much? 195 00:06:38,365 --> 00:06:41,969 Because back in college, they were all off making free love, 196 00:06:42,035 --> 00:06:46,707 while I was making $2 an hour slicing rye bread in a deli! 197 00:06:46,774 --> 00:06:48,809 Enough with the rye bread, Murray. Take a walk. 198 00:06:48,876 --> 00:06:49,977 Yeah, yeah. 199 00:06:50,043 --> 00:06:51,579 Well, there go my big plans for the day, 200 00:06:51,645 --> 00:06:54,114 haranguing Erica and then Barry if there was time. 201 00:06:54,181 --> 00:06:57,885 Hmm, it's all hands on deck to get you sleeping like a snuggle bug again. 202 00:06:57,951 --> 00:06:59,587 It's just a few nightmares. I don't need your help. 203 00:06:59,653 --> 00:07:01,889 Tonight we're gonna start with a relaxing bubble bath. 204 00:07:01,955 --> 00:07:03,857 No baths. I'm a shower man now. 205 00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:07,427 After that, I'm gonna toast up your jammies real nice in the dryer, 206 00:07:07,495 --> 00:07:10,764 and then I'll tuck you in real tight to seal in the safeness. 207 00:07:10,831 --> 00:07:13,634 You do know that none of this will actually help me. 208 00:07:13,701 --> 00:07:15,969 For your information, science has proven 209 00:07:16,036 --> 00:07:17,905 that mamas can love away the fear. 210 00:07:17,971 --> 00:07:19,206 What science proves that? 211 00:07:19,272 --> 00:07:21,241 At Yale, they scared a thousand kids. 212 00:07:21,308 --> 00:07:22,810 Half were given mama love. 213 00:07:22,876 --> 00:07:24,545 Half were given a placebo. 214 00:07:24,612 --> 00:07:26,780 Guess which kids stopped having nightmares? 215 00:07:26,847 --> 00:07:28,816 None, 'cause it never happened! 216 00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:31,852 I could've been a scientist. I rest my case. 217 00:07:31,919 --> 00:07:33,487 'Cause I could've been a lawyer as well. 218 00:07:33,554 --> 00:07:36,490 I don't care what fancy career you gave up to raise me. 219 00:07:36,557 --> 00:07:38,859 I'll get over my nightmares by myself 220 00:07:38,926 --> 00:07:40,060 and without a bath. 221 00:07:40,127 --> 00:07:41,328 (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS) 222 00:07:41,394 --> 00:07:45,332 Stupid loving mother and her soothing science. 223 00:07:45,398 --> 00:07:49,703 (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS) 224 00:07:49,770 --> 00:07:51,104 Aah! Gah! 225 00:07:51,171 --> 00:07:52,506 Aah! No more sleep! 226 00:07:52,573 --> 00:07:54,241 Never ever again will there be sleep! 227 00:07:54,307 --> 00:07:56,544 C'mon, losers! Let's see some Quaker spirit 228 00:07:56,610 --> 00:07:58,546 and support your girls' volleyball team! 229 00:07:58,612 --> 00:08:00,848 Oh, my God, I can't believe she's back here again! 230 00:08:00,914 --> 00:08:02,950 Dang. Dude, I never thought I'd see the day 231 00:08:03,016 --> 00:08:04,952 where you would be embarrassed by her. 232 00:08:05,018 --> 00:08:08,188 Embarrassed? No. What? C'mon. Erica's my dream girl. 233 00:08:08,255 --> 00:08:09,757 And now the dream is over 234 00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:12,025 and you're left with a sad sack girlfriend 235 00:08:12,092 --> 00:08:13,193 stuck in thirteenth grade. 236 00:08:13,260 --> 00:08:14,528 That's a thing? Oh, yeah. 237 00:08:14,595 --> 00:08:16,496 See, Erica's become one of those losers 238 00:08:16,564 --> 00:08:18,298 who still hangs around after she's graduated. 239 00:08:18,365 --> 00:08:19,900 Get your cookies! 240 00:08:19,967 --> 00:08:21,602 Matt, tell me it's gonna be okay! 241 00:08:21,669 --> 00:08:23,837 I usually try and find a positive spin on things, 242 00:08:23,904 --> 00:08:25,405 but, um, this one's hard. 243 00:08:25,472 --> 00:08:28,676 Oh, no, even eternal optimist Matt Bradley lost hope? What do I do? 244 00:08:28,742 --> 00:08:29,943 Hey, JTP! Over here! 245 00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:31,511 ANDY: Oh, she sees us! ROB: Good luck, man! 246 00:08:31,579 --> 00:08:32,813 ANDY: Flee! 247 00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:34,414 Brownie on the house for my number-one customer. 248 00:08:34,481 --> 00:08:35,616 And as your number one, 249 00:08:35,683 --> 00:08:36,917 I feel like it's my job to tell you 250 00:08:36,984 --> 00:08:38,251 that people are calling you 251 00:08:38,318 --> 00:08:39,920 a lame-ass sad sack stuck in thirteenth grade. 252 00:08:39,987 --> 00:08:41,555 Not me! People. 253 00:08:41,622 --> 00:08:42,790 What people? 254 00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:45,058 Wait, is it Dan? Honestly, it's not. 255 00:08:45,125 --> 00:08:46,426 Oh, I am gonna make this school year 256 00:08:46,493 --> 00:08:48,161 a living hell for that goofus! 257 00:08:48,228 --> 00:08:50,731 No! You can't go around school terrorizing goofuses! 258 00:08:50,798 --> 00:08:52,165 You're an adult now! It's a crime! 259 00:08:52,232 --> 00:08:53,333 Dan brought this on himself! 260 00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:54,868 If he wants to dance, then we'll dance! 261 00:08:54,935 --> 00:08:56,236 Don't dance with Dan! 262 00:08:56,303 --> 00:08:58,271 It's me! I'm the people who think it! 263 00:08:58,338 --> 00:09:01,108 Stop covering for Dan! I'm not! 264 00:09:01,174 --> 00:09:02,542 I didn't know how to tell you, 265 00:09:02,610 --> 00:09:05,112 but graduation usually marks the end of a high-school career, 266 00:09:05,178 --> 00:09:06,580 which seems kinda lost on you. 267 00:09:06,647 --> 00:09:09,016 The only thing that's lost is your grip on reality! 268 00:09:09,082 --> 00:09:10,918 I am worshipped here! 269 00:09:10,984 --> 00:09:12,185 Watch! 270 00:09:12,252 --> 00:09:13,954 Attention, adoring fans! 271 00:09:14,021 --> 00:09:16,990 I'm gonna be throwing a kick-ass pre-party for the dance! 272 00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:18,158 Keg's on me! 273 00:09:18,225 --> 00:09:19,927 (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) Hear that? 274 00:09:19,993 --> 00:09:21,328 Who's in thirteenth grade now? 275 00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:23,864 Thirteenth grade? 276 00:09:23,931 --> 00:09:27,500 Dammit, I was assured high school stopped at twelfth! 277 00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:29,436 ADULT ADAM: Desperate to escape my Freddy nightmares, 278 00:09:29,502 --> 00:09:33,306 I visited the girl of my dreams after chugging a case of Jolt Cola. 279 00:09:33,373 --> 00:09:35,442 Hey, Lynnie. Hey, Vinny. Jackie home? 280 00:09:35,508 --> 00:09:38,511 Uh. She's upstairs watching Elm Streets two through five. Have at it. 281 00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:41,048 Um, I-I'm kind of Freddy'd out. 282 00:09:41,114 --> 00:09:44,284 Maybe I can wait for her in one of your many well-lit rooms. 283 00:09:44,351 --> 00:09:45,986 (WHISPERING) Just gonna grab this. You okay, big guy? 284 00:09:46,053 --> 00:09:47,788 Jackie said you haven't been sleeping much lately. 285 00:09:47,855 --> 00:09:52,125 No, I've been getting about seven, eight m-minutes a night. 286 00:09:52,192 --> 00:09:54,127 Look, I teach kids. It's what I do. 287 00:09:54,194 --> 00:09:56,764 Do you know the best way to conquer your deepest fears? 288 00:09:56,830 --> 00:09:58,498 Facing your fear head on. 289 00:09:58,565 --> 00:10:01,101 Here. Fangoria magazine? 290 00:10:01,168 --> 00:10:02,870 They go behind-the-scenes on all the horror movies 291 00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:04,537 and show you the special effects and the makeup, 292 00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:06,039 and they show you how they make it. 293 00:10:06,106 --> 00:10:08,208 Not so scary now, huh? That's Freddy Krueger? 294 00:10:08,275 --> 00:10:11,144 He's just a classically trained actor named Robert. 295 00:10:11,211 --> 00:10:13,246 This is awesome! 296 00:10:13,313 --> 00:10:15,683 ADULT ADAM: It really was. Thanks to Jackie's dad, my nightmares were over... 297 00:10:15,749 --> 00:10:16,784 Or so I thought. 298 00:10:16,850 --> 00:10:18,351 Aah! (CHUCKLES) 299 00:10:18,418 --> 00:10:20,320 Looks like my little fun-size Snickers is awake! 300 00:10:20,387 --> 00:10:22,389 Mom! You know it's not okay 301 00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:24,124 to stare at me for hours as I sleep! 302 00:10:24,191 --> 00:10:26,026 It's hard not to admire my handiwork. 303 00:10:26,093 --> 00:10:27,127 What are you talking about? 304 00:10:27,194 --> 00:10:28,996 I got you sleeping again! 305 00:10:29,062 --> 00:10:31,398 You know, a mother's love really is the best medicine! 306 00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:34,601 To be clear, Vin and Lynn Geary helped me, not your creep-o stuff. 307 00:10:34,668 --> 00:10:35,836 I'm sorry... Vin and Lynn what, now? 308 00:10:35,903 --> 00:10:37,404 You heard me. They used Fangoria 309 00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:39,139 to help me face my fears head on. 310 00:10:39,206 --> 00:10:40,440 Ho-no! 311 00:10:40,507 --> 00:10:42,609 How dare they successfully parent my child? 312 00:10:42,676 --> 00:10:45,345 Murray, get in here! Which moron did what? 313 00:10:45,412 --> 00:10:48,048 Just yell it to me! It's those damn Gearys again! 314 00:10:48,115 --> 00:10:49,582 They mixed in with our baby! 315 00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:51,885 The chutzpah! Those stinkin' hippies! 316 00:10:51,952 --> 00:10:53,821 They don't follow the rules of society! 317 00:10:53,887 --> 00:10:55,756 Really? You guys are that threatened by them 318 00:10:55,823 --> 00:10:57,858 just 'cause they're better parents than you in every way? 319 00:10:57,925 --> 00:11:01,094 Wha-a-a-a-at did you just say? 320 00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:02,362 N-Not in every way! 321 00:11:02,429 --> 00:11:04,998 I meant most ways, some ways! One way? 322 00:11:05,065 --> 00:11:06,834 Those Gearys are gonna get a crash course 323 00:11:06,900 --> 00:11:09,369 in real parenting from the Goldbergs. 324 00:11:09,436 --> 00:11:11,304 Oh, please stay away from those nice, better people! 325 00:11:11,371 --> 00:11:13,073 Please, no. Please, no. Please, no. Please, no. 326 00:11:13,140 --> 00:11:14,942 Please, no. Gearys, we need to talk. 327 00:11:15,008 --> 00:11:17,610 Hey, Goldbergs! Just bobbing for some apples. You want a turn, Mur? 328 00:11:17,677 --> 00:11:21,481 Do I want communal fruit from a hippie tub? I'm good. 329 00:11:21,548 --> 00:11:23,216 Play time's over, Gearys. 330 00:11:23,283 --> 00:11:24,785 Oh, you have got some nerve. 331 00:11:24,852 --> 00:11:27,120 I'm sorry, what exactly are you worked up about? 332 00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:28,521 (WHISPERING) We have to do something fast. 333 00:11:28,588 --> 00:11:31,959 Because of you people, my son stopped having night terrors. 334 00:11:32,025 --> 00:11:33,894 You're welcome? MURRAY: How shocking, 335 00:11:33,961 --> 00:11:35,062 the hippie doesn't get it! 336 00:11:35,128 --> 00:11:36,396 Why does he keep calling us hippies? 337 00:11:36,463 --> 00:11:38,031 Because of your head-in-the-sand 338 00:11:38,098 --> 00:11:39,499 loosey-goosey parenting style! 339 00:11:39,566 --> 00:11:41,434 Which is the reason my little angel 340 00:11:41,501 --> 00:11:43,136 started having nightmares to begin with! 341 00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:44,772 Well, maybe if he wasn't an over-mothered 342 00:11:44,838 --> 00:11:46,439 bubble-wrapped veal child, 343 00:11:46,506 --> 00:11:48,441 he wouldn't be having nightmares in the first place! 344 00:11:48,508 --> 00:11:49,810 (WHISPERING) Our parents are fighting! 345 00:11:49,877 --> 00:11:51,411 Do something! Look! 346 00:11:51,478 --> 00:11:53,781 They have hay rides! Hay makes everything better! 347 00:11:53,847 --> 00:11:57,584 Tell that to Rachel Hublitz's nephew who went on a hay ride 348 00:11:57,650 --> 00:11:59,820 and the open-air wagon turned over. 349 00:11:59,887 --> 00:12:01,521 They had to saw him out of the wreckage, 350 00:12:01,588 --> 00:12:03,824 and they accidentally cut the poor boy in half. 351 00:12:03,891 --> 00:12:07,427 Now he's just a torso and has to ride a special medical skateboard 352 00:12:07,494 --> 00:12:10,297 to his job at the DMV. No, thanks. 353 00:12:10,363 --> 00:12:13,166 Look, it's a corn maze! Let's split up by family! 354 00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:14,902 Are you sure it's safe? I bet your mom knows someone 355 00:12:14,968 --> 00:12:16,703 who was impaled by a pointy cob. 356 00:12:16,770 --> 00:12:18,038 Move, move, move. 357 00:12:18,105 --> 00:12:20,340 I was not done speaking to you people. Come on, Murray. 358 00:12:20,407 --> 00:12:22,810 ADULT ADAM: While my parents were on a mission to school the Gearys, 359 00:12:22,876 --> 00:12:26,814 Erica's only goal was to prove she wasn't a lame thirteenth grader. 360 00:12:26,880 --> 00:12:29,149 Hello, fine purveyor of spirits. 361 00:12:29,216 --> 00:12:31,852 I would like nine kegs of your cheapest and frothiest beer, please. 362 00:12:31,919 --> 00:12:34,421 Gonna need to see some ID. I was prepared for that. 363 00:12:34,487 --> 00:12:35,823 Pla-dow! 364 00:12:35,889 --> 00:12:37,457 This is a freshman college ID. 365 00:12:37,524 --> 00:12:40,193 Which proves I'm not some high-school bozo off the street. 366 00:12:40,260 --> 00:12:42,095 It also proves that you're not 21. 367 00:12:42,162 --> 00:12:44,331 Would it help if I told you that I really need a keg to look cool? 368 00:12:44,397 --> 00:12:46,299 It would not. Would it matter if I cried and/or begged? 369 00:12:46,366 --> 00:12:49,436 Still a no. Please! I am in a really bad place, man! 370 00:12:49,502 --> 00:12:51,872 The validation that I'll get from some random high-school kids 371 00:12:51,939 --> 00:12:53,340 is all that's getting me by right now! 372 00:12:53,406 --> 00:12:55,308 So, please, I gotta get a keg! 373 00:12:55,375 --> 00:12:57,710 I could just fill one up with some crappy non-alcoholic beer. 374 00:12:57,777 --> 00:12:59,746 Seriously, dude? No one would stoop that low. 375 00:12:59,813 --> 00:13:01,114 What up, party people? 376 00:13:01,181 --> 00:13:02,582 Guess who got a real keg 377 00:13:02,649 --> 00:13:04,885 of genuine alcoholic beer? 378 00:13:04,952 --> 00:13:08,121 Look, the girl that was getting on our nerves finally did something cool! 379 00:13:08,188 --> 00:13:09,890 Okay, you have seriously lost it! 380 00:13:09,957 --> 00:13:12,592 You can't bring a keg-wagon to school just to prove me wrong! 381 00:13:12,659 --> 00:13:14,494 All I'm proving is these people love me 382 00:13:14,561 --> 00:13:16,463 and I'm not in the thirteenth grade. 383 00:13:16,529 --> 00:13:19,532 Hey, pre-party before the dance is at the water tower! 384 00:13:19,599 --> 00:13:20,600 Now cheer for me! 385 00:13:20,667 --> 00:13:22,069 (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) 386 00:13:22,135 --> 00:13:25,038 Nothing can touch you, Erica! You're untouchable! 387 00:13:25,105 --> 00:13:27,607 Miss Goldberg, you are in serious trouble! 388 00:13:27,674 --> 00:13:29,176 My office right now! 389 00:13:29,242 --> 00:13:30,543 STUDENTS: Ooh. 390 00:13:30,610 --> 00:13:33,213 Well, I no longer go here so you can't tell me what to do. 391 00:13:33,280 --> 00:13:34,614 STUDENTS: Ooh! 392 00:13:34,681 --> 00:13:36,783 Well, I'll just have you arrested for criminal trespassing 393 00:13:36,850 --> 00:13:39,319 and providing alcohol to minors! 394 00:13:39,386 --> 00:13:41,488 STUDENTS: Ooh. 395 00:13:41,554 --> 00:13:42,956 Please stop. 396 00:13:43,023 --> 00:13:44,791 VINNY: Ohh. I think we've been here already. 397 00:13:44,858 --> 00:13:47,260 Well, clueless people, clueless parents. 398 00:13:47,327 --> 00:13:49,329 Okay! That's it, Beverly! 399 00:13:49,396 --> 00:13:51,498 You have seriously crossed the line! 400 00:13:51,564 --> 00:13:52,966 Please, all I did was question 401 00:13:53,033 --> 00:13:55,368 whether you should bring another child into this world. 402 00:13:55,435 --> 00:13:57,971 And a hippie child no less. Ugh, we get it! 403 00:13:58,038 --> 00:14:00,373 You hate hippies 'cause you were lame in college! 404 00:14:00,440 --> 00:14:03,110 I worked two jobs to get through Penn State. 405 00:14:03,176 --> 00:14:06,246 You don't think I wanted to dance and wear beads? 406 00:14:06,313 --> 00:14:08,415 No. Can't imagine you wanting any of that. 407 00:14:08,481 --> 00:14:10,750 You have no idea what this complicated man wants! 408 00:14:10,817 --> 00:14:12,585 What do we do? We gotta split 'em up! 409 00:14:12,652 --> 00:14:14,721 Hurry! Goldbergs, this way! 410 00:14:14,787 --> 00:14:16,389 BEVERLY: And I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, 411 00:14:16,456 --> 00:14:18,758 but I don't trust you people, and frankly... 412 00:14:18,825 --> 00:14:20,293 I'm not comfortable with Adam spending 413 00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:22,462 any more unsupervised time at your madhouse! 414 00:14:22,529 --> 00:14:24,064 Tell ya what, maybe our kids 415 00:14:24,131 --> 00:14:25,532 shouldn't see each other at all! 416 00:14:25,598 --> 00:14:27,434 What? Jackie Renee Geary, get to the car! 417 00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:29,669 I bet it's a Volkswagen love bus. 418 00:14:29,736 --> 00:14:31,939 It's a Saab, so suck it! 419 00:14:32,005 --> 00:14:33,640 I can't believe you two! 420 00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:35,275 Look, we are your parents, 421 00:14:35,342 --> 00:14:36,743 and we know what's best for you... 422 00:14:36,809 --> 00:14:39,446 But you don't! The Gearys helped me, not you! 423 00:14:39,512 --> 00:14:41,548 Honestly, I wish they were my parents! 424 00:14:41,614 --> 00:14:42,649 You don't mean that... 425 00:14:42,715 --> 00:14:44,484 I've never meant anything more. 426 00:14:45,752 --> 00:14:47,754 ** 427 00:14:47,820 --> 00:14:49,222 Dead end! Still mad! 428 00:14:49,289 --> 00:14:50,991 Okay, I know all this looks super bad, 429 00:14:51,058 --> 00:14:53,126 but this isn't even real beer! 430 00:14:53,193 --> 00:14:54,694 I'm a fraud and I'm lame! 431 00:14:54,761 --> 00:14:56,596 So you'd fool a bunch of kids 432 00:14:56,663 --> 00:14:58,966 with a fake keg just to seem cool? 433 00:14:59,032 --> 00:15:01,568 You've sunk pret-ty low, Ms. Goldberg. 434 00:15:02,535 --> 00:15:03,703 Well, whadaya know! 435 00:15:03,770 --> 00:15:06,239 Johnny G scored us a keg-irino 436 00:15:06,306 --> 00:15:08,341 for the teacher's lounge Halloween mixer! 437 00:15:08,408 --> 00:15:09,442 Oh, um, this is... 438 00:15:09,509 --> 00:15:11,178 And here you guys insisted this man 439 00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:13,046 was nothing but a button-down cornball. 440 00:15:13,113 --> 00:15:15,115 Well, shows what you all know! (CHUCKLES) 441 00:15:15,182 --> 00:15:19,586 Why don't we tap this very alcoholic bad boy, people? (CHUCKLES) 442 00:15:19,652 --> 00:15:21,054 Mr. G brought the fun. 443 00:15:21,121 --> 00:15:23,056 Unbelievable! They just stole my keg! 444 00:15:23,123 --> 00:15:24,824 How am I supposed to impress the seniors now? 445 00:15:24,891 --> 00:15:27,194 That's your takeaway here? God, why are you yelling at me? 446 00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:29,129 Because this is all beyond embarrassing! 447 00:15:29,196 --> 00:15:31,498 Not just for you, but for me, too! Especially for me! 448 00:15:31,564 --> 00:15:33,800 Wait, I embarrass you? What's that supposed to mean? 449 00:15:33,866 --> 00:15:36,636 It means there's a reason that I didn't tell anyone that we were dating 450 00:15:36,703 --> 00:15:38,371 for the first three months of our relationship. 451 00:15:38,438 --> 00:15:40,040 You said it's because secrets make it hotter. 452 00:15:40,107 --> 00:15:41,241 Well, here's the truth. 453 00:15:41,308 --> 00:15:43,043 I didn't tell anyone because I was popular 454 00:15:43,110 --> 00:15:44,644 and the last thing I wanted 455 00:15:44,711 --> 00:15:47,380 was for people to see me with my brother's puppy dog friend 456 00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:50,150 who followed me around for a decade until I caved! 457 00:15:50,217 --> 00:15:51,951 Well, don't worry. That ends now. 458 00:15:52,719 --> 00:15:55,888 ** 459 00:16:00,327 --> 00:16:02,729 ADULT ADAM: After I disowned my mom for ruining things with Jackie, 460 00:16:02,795 --> 00:16:04,464 she decided to try and reconnect with me 461 00:16:04,531 --> 00:16:07,500 using the thing I loved most, movies. 462 00:16:07,567 --> 00:16:09,369 Adam? Where'd you go? 463 00:16:09,436 --> 00:16:10,870 * One, two 464 00:16:10,937 --> 00:16:13,173 * Freddy's coming for you... 465 00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:14,541 * Three, four 466 00:16:14,607 --> 00:16:17,010 * You better lock your door * 467 00:16:17,077 --> 00:16:19,012 Excuse me. Hi, um... 468 00:16:19,079 --> 00:16:20,813 I lost my little baby. 469 00:16:20,880 --> 00:16:22,749 His name's Adam, goes by "Schmoo." 470 00:16:23,716 --> 00:16:26,819 Schmoo's not here. (CACKLES) 471 00:16:26,886 --> 00:16:29,056 I...take it you work here. 472 00:16:29,122 --> 00:16:30,857 Try again. 473 00:16:30,923 --> 00:16:33,593 Yeah, I don't have time for games. I lost my son. 474 00:16:33,660 --> 00:16:37,530 Ooh. Bad mommy lost her little brat. 475 00:16:37,597 --> 00:16:40,867 (CHUCKLING) I'm sorry, who do you think you are? 476 00:16:40,933 --> 00:16:42,435 Your worst nightmare. 477 00:16:42,502 --> 00:16:44,304 (LAUGHS EVILLY) 478 00:16:44,371 --> 00:16:46,873 (SNORING) 479 00:16:46,939 --> 00:16:48,608 (LAUGHING EVILLY) 480 00:16:48,675 --> 00:16:49,776 Oh... 481 00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:51,911 ** 482 00:16:53,380 --> 00:16:54,414 Gotta hide. 483 00:16:54,481 --> 00:16:55,748 What the... 484 00:16:56,483 --> 00:16:57,484 My sweaters! 485 00:16:58,585 --> 00:17:00,953 You got good taste, lady. 486 00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:02,055 (GASPS) 487 00:17:02,122 --> 00:17:03,956 (LAUGHS EVILLY) 488 00:17:05,292 --> 00:17:07,127 Whatever, I don't care what happens to me. 489 00:17:07,194 --> 00:17:09,429 I'm already living my worst nightmare. 490 00:17:09,496 --> 00:17:11,064 Huh? 491 00:17:11,131 --> 00:17:13,566 I-I thought I was doing a... A pretty damn good job here. 492 00:17:13,633 --> 00:17:17,704 No, you're great with the knifey hands and the melting-candle face. 493 00:17:17,770 --> 00:17:19,106 It's just... (SIGHS) 494 00:17:19,172 --> 00:17:21,274 Adam said he wished I wasn't his mother. 495 00:17:21,341 --> 00:17:24,644 Oh, geez. That's an awful thing to say. Mmm. 496 00:17:24,711 --> 00:17:25,745 I'm-a kill him. 497 00:17:25,812 --> 00:17:27,114 No. 498 00:17:27,180 --> 00:17:29,349 The more I think about it, I deserved what Adam said. 499 00:17:29,416 --> 00:17:31,551 I was terrible to Jackie's parents. 500 00:17:31,618 --> 00:17:33,486 Parents. (CHUCKLING) Who needs 'em? 501 00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:37,157 I never knew any of my fathers, and I turned out just fine. 502 00:17:37,224 --> 00:17:38,658 I don't see how that applies to me, 503 00:17:38,725 --> 00:17:40,327 but I couldn't stand the Gearys 504 00:17:40,393 --> 00:17:41,694 because of the way they parented. 505 00:17:41,761 --> 00:17:45,198 But then, they were able to help Adam, and I wasn't. 506 00:17:45,265 --> 00:17:49,136 Eh, this is getting way too touchy-feely for this cowboy. 507 00:17:49,202 --> 00:17:51,938 (BLEEP) it, time to die! 508 00:17:52,004 --> 00:17:53,173 No. 509 00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:55,275 Time to get my (BLEEP) son back. 510 00:17:55,342 --> 00:17:58,811 Hey! I say the (BLEEP) around here, lady! 511 00:17:58,878 --> 00:18:00,580 Not anymore, Mr. Kroeger. 512 00:18:01,548 --> 00:18:02,949 Krueger! It's Krueger! 513 00:18:03,015 --> 00:18:04,117 Aah! 514 00:18:04,184 --> 00:18:05,552 (GASPS) Oh! What? 515 00:18:05,618 --> 00:18:06,786 What... What happened with the thing? 516 00:18:06,853 --> 00:18:07,987 Oh, I had the worst nightmare. 517 00:18:08,054 --> 00:18:09,622 I got to go talk to Adam. (SNORING) 518 00:18:09,689 --> 00:18:11,023 Okay. 519 00:18:11,090 --> 00:18:13,092 I know you said you didn't want to talk to me anymore, 520 00:18:13,160 --> 00:18:14,327 but I... It's fine, all is forgiven! 521 00:18:14,394 --> 00:18:16,963 No, it's not. I just had this crazy awful dream, 522 00:18:17,029 --> 00:18:19,299 and it made me realize... Well, live and learn! 523 00:18:19,366 --> 00:18:20,667 Life's a journey, thanks for popping in! 524 00:18:20,733 --> 00:18:22,302 Uh. What's that? 525 00:18:22,369 --> 00:18:23,703 Oh, balls. 526 00:18:23,770 --> 00:18:25,872 That is my Halloween mask. 527 00:18:25,938 --> 00:18:27,039 I'm Garfield. 528 00:18:27,106 --> 00:18:28,141 Lasagna. 529 00:18:28,208 --> 00:18:29,709 Oh, balls. 530 00:18:29,776 --> 00:18:31,244 Oh, hi, Mrs. Goldberg! 531 00:18:31,311 --> 00:18:32,479 Is Adam home? 532 00:18:32,545 --> 00:18:33,646 Hey! It's Jackie! 533 00:18:33,713 --> 00:18:36,516 Crazy girl! This is my house, not hers. 534 00:18:36,583 --> 00:18:37,850 Stop talking. 535 00:18:37,917 --> 00:18:39,118 Yeah, t-this one's hard to spin. 536 00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:41,888 (DOORBELL RINGS) 537 00:18:42,655 --> 00:18:43,790 Trick or Treat. 538 00:18:43,856 --> 00:18:45,958 You can just take two and be on your way. 539 00:18:46,025 --> 00:18:48,161 I don't want candy, Geoff. I want to make this right. 540 00:18:48,228 --> 00:18:49,362 Why? 541 00:18:49,429 --> 00:18:50,997 You were very clear. I'm an embarrassment. 542 00:18:51,063 --> 00:18:52,899 Look, I know I hurt you, 543 00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:55,935 but I was just lashing out because I couldn't admit the truth... 544 00:18:57,036 --> 00:18:58,137 I am embarrassed. 545 00:18:58,971 --> 00:19:00,407 Of me. 546 00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:02,209 Of what I've become. 547 00:19:02,275 --> 00:19:03,943 A loser who peaked in high school. 548 00:19:04,010 --> 00:19:07,214 Maybe you think saying all that fixes this, but it really doesn't. 549 00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:08,515 I know. 550 00:19:08,581 --> 00:19:10,617 But I'm hoping that going with you to that dance does. 551 00:19:12,151 --> 00:19:13,353 Depends. 552 00:19:13,420 --> 00:19:16,088 (HALL & OATES' YOU MAKE MY DREAMS PLAYS) 553 00:19:16,155 --> 00:19:17,724 You ready to make my dreams come true? 554 00:19:17,790 --> 00:19:19,692 (LAUGHS) No. 555 00:19:19,759 --> 00:19:21,994 ** 556 00:19:22,061 --> 00:19:24,030 (LAUGHS) Darn it. 557 00:19:24,096 --> 00:19:25,998 * What I want, you've got 558 00:19:26,065 --> 00:19:28,301 * And it might be hard to handle 559 00:19:28,368 --> 00:19:31,638 * But like the flame that burns the candle 560 00:19:31,704 --> 00:19:34,241 * The candle feeds the flame 561 00:19:34,307 --> 00:19:37,944 Hi. We're here to pick up our lying, deceitful daughter who we stupidly trusted. 562 00:19:38,010 --> 00:19:40,247 (SIGHS) Guess you were right. We're the bad parents. 563 00:19:40,313 --> 00:19:42,249 Go ahead. Rub it in our hippie faces. 564 00:19:42,315 --> 00:19:45,051 No, all I want to do is apologize. 565 00:19:45,117 --> 00:19:47,720 Really? Why? I was jealous. 566 00:19:47,787 --> 00:19:50,323 I thought you were the better parents. 567 00:19:50,390 --> 00:19:52,759 But both our kids are pretty great, 568 00:19:52,825 --> 00:19:57,464 so maybe there's more than one right way to raise them. 569 00:19:57,530 --> 00:20:02,068 'Cause I realized as good as we are with our own kids, we're even better as a team. 570 00:20:02,134 --> 00:20:03,270 We really are. 571 00:20:04,203 --> 00:20:05,472 I wanted to see Arlo Guthrie. 572 00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:06,573 BOTH: What? 573 00:20:06,639 --> 00:20:08,341 Yeah. At Woodstock! 574 00:20:08,408 --> 00:20:11,678 But I had to work, and all my friends got to jam and dance and bongo. 575 00:20:11,744 --> 00:20:12,945 Oh. That sucks, man. I'm sorry. 576 00:20:13,012 --> 00:20:14,146 Eh, whadaya gonna do? 577 00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:15,582 Well, Arlo's coming to Philly next month. 578 00:20:15,648 --> 00:20:18,084 I could get us some tickets maybe? 579 00:20:18,150 --> 00:20:19,519 Maybe. 580 00:20:19,586 --> 00:20:22,355 * You make my dreams come true 581 00:20:22,422 --> 00:20:24,924 ADULT ADAM: So often, we're afraid of things 582 00:20:24,991 --> 00:20:26,959 because they're different from what we know. 583 00:20:27,026 --> 00:20:31,097 But when we learn to embrace the unfamiliar, that's when we can truly grow, 584 00:20:31,163 --> 00:20:33,065 shed the old versions of ourselves 585 00:20:33,132 --> 00:20:35,101 and leave our comfort zone behind. 586 00:20:35,167 --> 00:20:37,136 'Cause in the end, the things that scare us the most 587 00:20:37,203 --> 00:20:39,071 can bring us closer than we ever imagined. 588 00:20:39,138 --> 00:20:42,174 And that's when our dreams really do come true. 589 00:20:42,241 --> 00:20:44,076 * You make my dreams... * 590 00:20:46,713 --> 00:20:48,515 (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS) 591 00:20:48,581 --> 00:20:49,816 Oh, no. 592 00:20:49,882 --> 00:20:51,618 It's the keyboard. It's evil! 593 00:20:51,684 --> 00:20:53,320 Aah! 594 00:20:54,153 --> 00:20:55,254 Ohh. 595 00:20:55,322 --> 00:20:58,090 Ohh. Oh. Bad dream. 596 00:20:58,157 --> 00:21:00,460 Keg's kicked, pal. Can you spot me a ride? 597 00:21:00,527 --> 00:21:03,330 Oh. I guess that is the responsible thing to do 598 00:21:03,396 --> 00:21:06,666 after you drank all of these very real beers. 599 00:21:06,733 --> 00:21:08,435 Uh, where do you live? Paramus. 600 00:21:08,501 --> 00:21:09,636 That's like two hours away! 601 00:21:09,702 --> 00:21:11,971 Not if we make a pit stop in Secaucus. 602 00:21:12,038 --> 00:21:14,574 I got to pick up my special protein powder from my protein guy. 603 00:21:14,641 --> 00:21:16,376 You're gonna like that guy. He is ripped. 604 00:21:16,443 --> 00:21:18,445 And then, we can go see my Aunt Stephanie. 605 00:21:18,511 --> 00:21:19,812 You're gonna like her. She's ripped. 606 00:21:19,879 --> 00:21:21,481 Okay, look. The beer is fake. 607 00:21:21,548 --> 00:21:22,649 You're fine. 608 00:21:22,715 --> 00:21:23,916 Get home safe.