1 00:00:00,034 --> 00:00:02,768 ADULT ADAM: Back in the '80s, before you could buy everything 2 00:00:02,770 --> 00:00:04,169 from your couch, you had to drive 3 00:00:04,171 --> 00:00:05,738 to an actual location to get stuff. 4 00:00:05,740 --> 00:00:08,507 This magical place was known as "The mall." 5 00:00:08,509 --> 00:00:11,143 It was the center of every teenager's universe. 6 00:00:11,145 --> 00:00:14,747 And nobody loved the mall more than my brother and sister. 7 00:00:14,749 --> 00:00:16,949 Mmm! Hickory farms samples! 8 00:00:16,951 --> 00:00:17,950 What's better than free meat? 9 00:00:17,952 --> 00:00:19,852 Do you even know what you're eating right now? 10 00:00:19,854 --> 00:00:22,354 Hello? It's summer sausage. 11 00:00:22,356 --> 00:00:24,790 It's delicious because it's made by the sun. 12 00:00:24,792 --> 00:00:27,826 This just might be the best day of my life. 13 00:00:27,828 --> 00:00:28,460 Oh, no! 14 00:00:28,462 --> 00:00:31,263 ADULT ADAM: For my brother, the mall took a dark turn 15 00:00:31,265 --> 00:00:33,232 when it was time to make the lemonade. 16 00:00:33,234 --> 00:00:35,634 Attention, perverts! 17 00:00:35,636 --> 00:00:38,670 Look away from the hot dog on a stick girl 18 00:00:38,672 --> 00:00:40,372 or face my fury! 19 00:00:40,508 --> 00:00:41,340 Uh, Barry? What's the deal? 20 00:00:41,342 --> 00:00:44,276 Well, honey, similar to Bruce Lee in Enter the dragon, 21 00:00:44,278 --> 00:00:46,545 I am about to fight everyone! 22 00:00:46,547 --> 00:00:48,881 Erica, hold my meat. Hold your own meat! 23 00:00:48,883 --> 00:00:51,817 Babe, these guys aren't here just to watch me make lemonade. 24 00:00:51,819 --> 00:00:54,019 They do it for everyone. See? Look at Dave Kim. 25 00:00:54,021 --> 00:00:55,587 Boo! (CROWD GROANS) 26 00:00:55,589 --> 00:00:57,156 That's right, that's right. 27 00:00:57,158 --> 00:00:58,157 Walk away. 28 00:00:58,159 --> 00:00:59,324 Will you stop it? 29 00:00:59,326 --> 00:01:00,092 I want to keep this job. 30 00:01:00,094 --> 00:01:02,227 The money's good, and I got my eye on one of those. 31 00:01:02,229 --> 00:01:04,663 The best yellow boom box money can buy. 32 00:01:04,665 --> 00:01:05,664 Look at all that yellow! 33 00:01:05,666 --> 00:01:08,300 It's so compact and waterproof. 34 00:01:08,302 --> 00:01:10,069 That's perfect for my swim routine. 35 00:01:10,071 --> 00:01:10,736 Well, keep dreaming, 36 00:01:10,738 --> 00:01:12,738 'cause there's no way Dad's ever gonna buy us one. 37 00:01:12,740 --> 00:01:14,706 Well, you could always get jobs. 38 00:01:14,708 --> 00:01:14,973 A job? 39 00:01:14,975 --> 00:01:17,342 How would I be able to spend time after school at the mall 40 00:01:17,344 --> 00:01:19,111 if I already have a job after school at the mall? 41 00:01:19,113 --> 00:01:22,648 Eh, too bad, 'cause they're hiring at Spencer's Gifts. 42 00:01:22,650 --> 00:01:24,083 ADULT ADAM: Ah, Spencer's Gifts, 43 00:01:24,085 --> 00:01:24,983 the mall's one and only novelty store 44 00:01:24,985 --> 00:01:29,621 that specialized in wacky gag gifts guaranteed to offend. 45 00:01:29,623 --> 00:01:30,389 BOTH: Whoa! 46 00:01:30,391 --> 00:01:32,758 I can actually get a job at the store 47 00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:35,961 I bought two of my four Spuds MacKenzie posters? 48 00:01:35,963 --> 00:01:37,496 This is a dream come true! 49 00:01:37,498 --> 00:01:39,832 'Cause I need money and they're hiring! 50 00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:43,035 Dad, we need you to sign a permission slip. 51 00:01:43,037 --> 00:01:44,803 Ask your mother. She's not home. 52 00:01:44,805 --> 00:01:46,138 I hope it's not time-sensitive. 53 00:01:46,140 --> 00:01:47,072 Good luck to both of you. 54 00:01:47,074 --> 00:01:48,474 We both got jobs at Spencer's Gifts, 55 00:01:48,476 --> 00:01:50,309 and we can't start until we get parental consent. 56 00:01:50,311 --> 00:01:51,777 Give it to me! I'll sign it right now! 57 00:01:51,779 --> 00:01:53,645 Before you do, you should really understand 58 00:01:53,647 --> 00:01:54,680 what you're agreeing to. I agree. 59 00:01:54,682 --> 00:01:57,116 Just know if you sign that slip, there's a good chance 60 00:01:57,118 --> 00:01:59,518 we'll become fully independent and move out. 61 00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:00,252 Damn it, where's my pen? 62 00:02:00,254 --> 00:02:01,653 You might not even have to pay for college. 63 00:02:01,655 --> 00:02:03,522 I need my pen! Here you go, Father. 64 00:02:03,524 --> 00:02:05,757 Let's sign this baby. 65 00:02:05,759 --> 00:02:08,660 And that's just one of the many hilarious items 66 00:02:08,662 --> 00:02:09,995 we'll be selling at Spencer's Gifts. 67 00:02:09,997 --> 00:02:13,565 Not even you being a moron can spoil my mood. 68 00:02:13,567 --> 00:02:16,401 This is the greatest day of my life! 69 00:02:16,403 --> 00:02:17,936 Uh, this'll work. 70 00:02:17,938 --> 00:02:19,271 ¶ I'm twisted up inside 71 00:02:19,273 --> 00:02:23,142 ¶ But nonetheless I feel the need to say 72 00:02:25,446 --> 00:02:26,612 ¶ I don't know the future 73 00:02:26,614 --> 00:02:30,382 ¶ But the past keeps getting clearer every day ¶ 74 00:02:30,584 --> 00:02:34,253 ¶ I see your true colors shining through ¶ 75 00:02:34,255 --> 00:02:36,722 ADULT ADAM: It was February 15th, 1980-something, 76 00:02:36,724 --> 00:02:38,790 and I was hard at work honing my skills 77 00:02:38,792 --> 00:02:40,926 as a VHS home-movie maker. 78 00:02:40,928 --> 00:02:42,995 Not everyone was a fan, but there was 79 00:02:42,997 --> 00:02:46,498 one blond-haired lady who couldn't get enough. 80 00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:48,233 Yeah, I stare at him, too. 81 00:02:48,235 --> 00:02:48,700 (CHUCKLES) 82 00:02:48,702 --> 00:02:50,836 It's hard to believe that the bigger he gets, 83 00:02:50,838 --> 00:02:52,704 the more delicious he becomes, huh? 84 00:02:52,706 --> 00:02:54,506 ERICA: Are we looking at the same thing? 85 00:02:54,508 --> 00:02:56,008 The hell is in your son's hands right now? 86 00:02:56,010 --> 00:02:59,678 Why does he have a waterproof Sports Boombox with mega bass 87 00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:01,880 when we had to get jobs to get one? 88 00:03:01,882 --> 00:03:03,682 Adam is not like the two of you. 89 00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:05,951 He can't just work any old job. 90 00:03:05,953 --> 00:03:08,754 He's, uh... What do I want to say here... 91 00:03:08,756 --> 00:03:09,688 Better than you. 92 00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:11,190 He's better than you! You can't say that! 93 00:03:11,192 --> 00:03:12,624 I knew you'd understand. 94 00:03:12,626 --> 00:03:15,994 Dad, tell your wife to tell your boy son 95 00:03:15,996 --> 00:03:18,363 that he needs to get a job, like the rest of us. 96 00:03:18,365 --> 00:03:19,464 Hey, moron! 97 00:03:19,466 --> 00:03:21,066 Get a job, like the other two morons. 98 00:03:21,068 --> 00:03:24,203 No, thanks. See, I'm not so much the job guy. 99 00:03:24,205 --> 00:03:26,171 I'm more the guy behind the job guy 100 00:03:26,173 --> 00:03:28,040 who just sits there and plays with his toys. 101 00:03:28,042 --> 00:03:30,108 You get it. I don't. Get a job. 102 00:03:30,110 --> 00:03:33,412 No, n-n-n-n-n-n-no. Adam doesn't need a job. 103 00:03:33,414 --> 00:03:35,214 He's already got a career. Doing what? 104 00:03:35,216 --> 00:03:38,116 Adam is going to be a famous director. 105 00:03:38,118 --> 00:03:39,918 Mmm. And if you don't believe me, 106 00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:41,453 just ask his guidance counselor. 107 00:03:41,455 --> 00:03:44,223 No, your son would do miserably in Hollywood, 108 00:03:44,225 --> 00:03:44,957 and that's a fact. 109 00:03:44,959 --> 00:03:47,559 My son is a star, and you're gonna die alone! 110 00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:48,927 While I do feel that way, 111 00:03:48,929 --> 00:03:50,662 I'm just stating the hard truth. 112 00:03:50,664 --> 00:03:52,264 It's more likely that your puny son 113 00:03:52,266 --> 00:03:54,299 will become a power forward for the Sixers 114 00:03:54,301 --> 00:03:56,068 than a big Hollywood muckety-muck. 115 00:03:56,070 --> 00:03:56,468 Oh, no, Mama. 116 00:03:56,470 --> 00:03:58,837 I don't want to play whatever sport he's talking about. 117 00:03:58,839 --> 00:04:00,038 Don't worry, sweet potato. 118 00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:01,974 Mr. Glascott doesn't know anything. 119 00:04:01,976 --> 00:04:03,141 Oh, but I do. 120 00:04:03,143 --> 00:04:05,310 You see, I once made my way out to LA. 121 00:04:05,312 --> 00:04:06,445 With my own foolish dreams. 122 00:04:06,447 --> 00:04:10,115 I thought I'd become a big-time Hollywood scriptwriter. 123 00:04:10,117 --> 00:04:12,217 I even wrote a teleplay. 124 00:04:12,553 --> 00:04:13,518 "Sole brothers"? 125 00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:15,887 MR. GLASCOTT: That's "Sole" spelled S-O-L-E. 126 00:04:15,889 --> 00:04:18,757 Upon their father's death, two brothers take the reins, 127 00:04:18,759 --> 00:04:21,827 or laces of the family shoe store. 128 00:04:21,829 --> 00:04:25,163 They're detectives, but they have different styles. 129 00:04:25,866 --> 00:04:27,532 You really need to read it. No, I don't. 130 00:04:27,534 --> 00:04:28,467 What are you telling my boy? 131 00:04:28,469 --> 00:04:30,736 I'm telling your son the same thing Robert Wagner told me 132 00:04:30,738 --> 00:04:33,205 when I approached him in the men's room at Chasen's, 133 00:04:33,207 --> 00:04:34,473 "This is inappropriate." 134 00:04:34,475 --> 00:04:35,574 Okay, let me clean this up. 135 00:04:35,576 --> 00:04:38,110 He's saying you're definitely not gonna make it. 136 00:04:38,112 --> 00:04:39,278 Good talk. 137 00:04:39,280 --> 00:04:40,879 But Mom believes in me. 138 00:04:40,881 --> 00:04:42,147 Yeah, well, she also believes 139 00:04:42,149 --> 00:04:44,850 that Erica's gonna be on the cover of Rolling Stone 140 00:04:44,852 --> 00:04:46,351 and Barry's gonna be a surgeon. 141 00:04:46,353 --> 00:04:49,688 Oh, sweet balls! None of those things are ever gonna happen! 142 00:04:49,690 --> 00:04:50,322 I have to get a job. 143 00:04:50,324 --> 00:04:53,659 But you already have one, making wonderful home movies 144 00:04:53,661 --> 00:04:56,061 and winning the Academy Award of my heart. 145 00:04:56,063 --> 00:04:56,695 Mom, it's okay. 146 00:04:56,697 --> 00:05:00,032 Based on Mr. Glascott's tale of broken dreams, 147 00:05:00,034 --> 00:05:01,199 I should explore my options. 148 00:05:01,201 --> 00:05:03,435 Okay, fine. You can try one job. 149 00:05:03,437 --> 00:05:06,471 But as soon as everyone realizes that this a detour 150 00:05:06,473 --> 00:05:08,440 from what is obviously your destiny, 151 00:05:08,442 --> 00:05:11,109 you're going back to being my little moviemaker. 152 00:05:11,111 --> 00:05:13,312 Boom! He's getting a job. 153 00:05:13,314 --> 00:05:14,613 There you go. 154 00:05:14,615 --> 00:05:15,714 Oh, speaking of my screenplay, 155 00:05:15,716 --> 00:05:19,117 I mocked up a poster to help sell it in the room. 156 00:05:19,119 --> 00:05:22,521 These are twin shoe salesmen/detectives, 157 00:05:22,523 --> 00:05:24,256 Jeffrey Sole and David Alan brothers. 158 00:05:24,258 --> 00:05:26,892 If they're brothers, why do they have different last names? 159 00:05:26,894 --> 00:05:28,627 If you read the script, you'd understand! 160 00:05:28,629 --> 00:05:31,630 ADULT ADAM: While I was warming to the novelty of having a job, 161 00:05:31,632 --> 00:05:34,199 Barry and Erica were warming to their jobs 162 00:05:34,201 --> 00:05:35,534 of selling novelties. 163 00:05:35,536 --> 00:05:36,635 And last but not least, 164 00:05:36,637 --> 00:05:41,640 we have our edible underpants in all flavors and sizes. 165 00:05:41,642 --> 00:05:43,508 Questions? I got one. 166 00:05:43,644 --> 00:05:44,609 This place is awesome. 167 00:05:44,611 --> 00:05:46,478 That's not a question, kiss-ass. 168 00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:47,446 That's all right. 169 00:05:47,448 --> 00:05:49,781 I share young Barry's verve for the gag game. 170 00:05:49,783 --> 00:05:52,918 Well, sir, I'm gonna learn everything about this place, 171 00:05:52,920 --> 00:05:54,619 starting with the exploding golf balls. 172 00:05:54,621 --> 00:05:56,988 Sorry. Barry offers enthusiasm, but not much else. 173 00:05:56,990 --> 00:05:58,824 Really? 'Cause on his application, 174 00:05:58,826 --> 00:05:59,991 he said he was a genius 175 00:05:59,993 --> 00:06:02,461 who was studying pre-brain-surgery. 176 00:06:03,230 --> 00:06:05,931 Yep. (COUGHS) They explode, all right. 177 00:06:05,933 --> 00:06:06,998 Okay, here's what you need to know. 178 00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:10,435 Barry's gonna break stuff, scare customers, hurt himself. 179 00:06:10,437 --> 00:06:12,571 But he's my brother and I love the dope, 180 00:06:12,573 --> 00:06:14,773 so I'm offering to be a buffer. 181 00:06:14,775 --> 00:06:16,708 Thanks for the heads-up, Erica. 182 00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:18,977 How could you! What? 183 00:06:18,979 --> 00:06:21,546 I heard everything, thanks to this! 184 00:06:21,548 --> 00:06:23,515 You sold me out on the first day? 185 00:06:23,517 --> 00:06:25,984 I'm just protecting you from the biggest danger 186 00:06:25,986 --> 00:06:27,018 in your life... you. 187 00:06:27,020 --> 00:06:29,721 You really think you're better than me at everything? 188 00:06:29,723 --> 00:06:30,155 That I'm a joke? 189 00:06:30,157 --> 00:06:32,691 Barry, you're covered in exploding golf ball dust. 190 00:06:32,693 --> 00:06:33,625 Well, you're the joke. 191 00:06:33,627 --> 00:06:36,828 'Cause I'm not just gonna be the greatest brain doctor, 192 00:06:36,830 --> 00:06:41,032 I'm also gonna be the greatest Spencer's Gifts employee. 193 00:06:41,034 --> 00:06:42,300 How, you ask? 194 00:06:42,302 --> 00:06:42,901 I'll Out-Spencer Gifts you. 195 00:06:42,903 --> 00:06:45,804 Now, I got to get myself a new shirt, 'cause this one's ruined. 196 00:06:45,806 --> 00:06:50,275 ADULT ADAM: And so began the great Goldberg Spencer Gift-off. 197 00:06:50,277 --> 00:06:52,844 Sold my first item. Suck it. 198 00:06:52,846 --> 00:06:55,947 Yep, my brother was convinced he would walk away the winner. 199 00:06:55,949 --> 00:06:57,682 Meanwhile, I needed a job myself, 200 00:06:57,684 --> 00:07:00,519 and it was gonna take a true miracle. 201 00:07:00,521 --> 00:07:01,887 Wait a minute. 202 00:07:01,889 --> 00:07:02,721 Help found! 203 00:07:02,723 --> 00:07:05,323 If I could pass the impossible interview. 204 00:07:05,325 --> 00:07:07,192 How many quarters are in a dollar? 205 00:07:07,194 --> 00:07:08,093 Four. 206 00:07:08,095 --> 00:07:09,694 I'll be in the back, taking a nap. 207 00:07:09,696 --> 00:07:12,497 Sweet. Oh. And we're running a promotion. 208 00:07:12,499 --> 00:07:14,966 Every "A" a kid has on his report card, 209 00:07:14,968 --> 00:07:16,101 he gets a quarter. 210 00:07:16,103 --> 00:07:17,602 Got it? Sir, yes, sir! 211 00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:19,104 Don't do that. 212 00:07:19,573 --> 00:07:21,840 Dad, today I became a man! 213 00:07:21,842 --> 00:07:23,875 Go brag to your friends and your Grandpa. 214 00:07:23,877 --> 00:07:25,143 That's not a "me" thing. 215 00:07:25,145 --> 00:07:26,912 No, no! I got a job! 216 00:07:26,914 --> 00:07:27,712 A real one? 217 00:07:27,714 --> 00:07:29,681 Yep, at my favorite place in the world, 218 00:07:29,683 --> 00:07:30,916 the arcade. 219 00:07:30,918 --> 00:07:33,185 All my children have jobs? 220 00:07:33,187 --> 00:07:34,085 This is my dream. 221 00:07:34,087 --> 00:07:35,487 I close my eyes, and this is what I see. 222 00:07:35,489 --> 00:07:39,057 That's a sad dream, but you have a sad life, so I get it. 223 00:07:39,059 --> 00:07:40,225 Come here! 224 00:07:40,227 --> 00:07:42,027 What's happening? This is me hugging you. 225 00:07:42,029 --> 00:07:44,396 No! I'm hugging you! Just accept it! 226 00:07:44,398 --> 00:07:46,131 Mom! Dad's trying to hug me! 227 00:07:46,133 --> 00:07:48,600 Oh, Murray, you're finally expressing 228 00:07:48,602 --> 00:07:50,769 your love and affection towards your children! 229 00:07:50,771 --> 00:07:52,938 No, the little weird one got a job! 230 00:07:52,940 --> 00:07:54,739 What? Who would hire him? 231 00:07:54,741 --> 00:07:55,974 Don't know. Don't care. 232 00:07:55,976 --> 00:07:58,009 I thought he'd be singing in a wig for years. 233 00:07:58,011 --> 00:08:00,212 Me, too. Now, if you don't mind, 234 00:08:00,214 --> 00:08:01,713 I'm gonna go adjust my change belt. 235 00:08:01,715 --> 00:08:03,281 It was hanging a little low. 236 00:08:03,283 --> 00:08:04,115 (CLICKS TONGUE) 237 00:08:04,117 --> 00:08:07,552 How could you let him accept a job and be part of the world? 238 00:08:07,554 --> 00:08:08,420 I didn't do anything. It was easy. 239 00:08:08,422 --> 00:08:11,256 It's fine. I'll just wait it out until he quits or gets fired. 240 00:08:11,258 --> 00:08:14,759 Or he'll learn responsibility and pride from a job well done. 241 00:08:14,761 --> 00:08:16,027 Oh, shut the (BLEEP) up, Murray. 242 00:08:16,029 --> 00:08:18,330 ADULT ADAM: As my parents debated my new job, 243 00:08:18,332 --> 00:08:20,966 Erica was settling into hers. 244 00:08:20,968 --> 00:08:22,000 Welcome to Spencer's. 245 00:08:22,002 --> 00:08:23,168 Shopping for anything in particular? 246 00:08:23,170 --> 00:08:25,804 We're looking for party favors for Billy's birthday. 247 00:08:25,806 --> 00:08:27,539 I'm turning this much! 248 00:08:27,541 --> 00:08:29,508 Okay... Whatever that is. 249 00:08:29,510 --> 00:08:31,176 Well, we have great stuff for kids. 250 00:08:31,178 --> 00:08:33,912 Balloons, fake tattoos, bouncy balls. 251 00:08:33,914 --> 00:08:35,680 Boring! (CHUCKLES) 252 00:08:35,682 --> 00:08:38,650 Let me guess, William, you like poo-poo? 253 00:08:38,886 --> 00:08:40,218 You like fake barf? 254 00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:42,521 You like big ol' farts? Yes! 255 00:08:42,523 --> 00:08:44,456 Then come with me, 'cause you're gonna have 256 00:08:44,458 --> 00:08:46,892 the best birthday farty ever! 257 00:08:46,894 --> 00:08:48,026 Yay! 258 00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:49,094 BARRY: Let's go, little man. 259 00:08:49,096 --> 00:08:51,429 I know you were worried about your brother, 260 00:08:51,431 --> 00:08:52,864 but he's actually doing great. 261 00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:56,301 I'd say he's really embraced the spirit of Spencer's. 262 00:08:56,303 --> 00:08:58,970 Yeah, well, he's not the only one. 263 00:08:59,506 --> 00:09:00,505 Watch this. 264 00:09:00,507 --> 00:09:02,974 Hey, handsome. Welcome to Spencer's. 265 00:09:02,976 --> 00:09:04,409 Can I help you with anything? 266 00:09:04,411 --> 00:09:05,744 Nah, just kinda browsing. 267 00:09:05,746 --> 00:09:07,846 Dude! You like chicks? 268 00:09:07,848 --> 00:09:08,847 Um... Yeah. 269 00:09:08,849 --> 00:09:10,048 I'm kind of talking to one. 270 00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:11,116 Yeah, he's kind of talking to one. 271 00:09:11,118 --> 00:09:14,819 What about chicks in bikinis sun tanning on rad sports cars? 272 00:09:14,821 --> 00:09:17,556 Isn't that better than this dud? Yeah, probably. 273 00:09:17,558 --> 00:09:18,690 Then step to your right 274 00:09:18,692 --> 00:09:20,759 and check out our sweet posters! 275 00:09:20,761 --> 00:09:21,960 ADULT ADAM: And for the first time, 276 00:09:21,962 --> 00:09:23,895 Barry was Out-Spencering Erica. 277 00:09:23,897 --> 00:09:25,664 My Lord, look at that boy! 278 00:09:25,666 --> 00:09:29,768 Scooping up every super car and boobie poster we got. 279 00:09:29,770 --> 00:09:30,535 Just doing my job, sir. 280 00:09:30,537 --> 00:09:33,338 I know this is a small detour on your way to becoming 281 00:09:33,340 --> 00:09:36,441 a big-time brain surgeon, but how would you like 282 00:09:36,443 --> 00:09:38,276 to be assistant manager? BOTH: What? 283 00:09:38,278 --> 00:09:41,079 I've been looking for somebody to help me run this place. 284 00:09:41,081 --> 00:09:42,447 I found him. What do you say? 285 00:09:42,449 --> 00:09:44,482 I say you're gonna be out of business in two weeks. 286 00:09:44,484 --> 00:09:45,884 Thank you for this opportunity. 287 00:09:45,886 --> 00:09:48,286 Erica, your brilliant brother's in charge. 288 00:09:48,288 --> 00:09:51,790 Now, I'm gonna go lose myself in a Cinnabon. 289 00:09:51,792 --> 00:09:53,058 BARRY: Well, well, well. 290 00:09:53,060 --> 00:09:56,227 Looks like the master has become the student. 291 00:09:56,229 --> 00:09:57,128 That's not the expression. 292 00:09:57,130 --> 00:09:59,698 It is now, 'cause Barry's the boss. 293 00:09:59,700 --> 00:10:03,768 And the Boss Barry says clean all the dribble glasses 294 00:10:03,770 --> 00:10:05,937 and restock the fake turds. 295 00:10:06,039 --> 00:10:08,940 ADULT ADAM: As Erica faced the wrath of a new boss, 296 00:10:08,942 --> 00:10:11,142 I was facing bossy customers. 297 00:10:11,144 --> 00:10:13,345 Hey, there. Nine quarters, please. 298 00:10:13,347 --> 00:10:15,347 What's this? It's my report card. 299 00:10:15,349 --> 00:10:16,715 I'm a straight-A student. 300 00:10:16,717 --> 00:10:17,782 But I go to school with you, 301 00:10:17,784 --> 00:10:19,284 and the report cards haven't come out yet. 302 00:10:19,286 --> 00:10:20,452 Then why am I holding one? 303 00:10:20,454 --> 00:10:21,252 That's from three years ago! 304 00:10:21,254 --> 00:10:24,422 Plus, those aren't A's. They're F's you turned into A's. 305 00:10:24,424 --> 00:10:26,324 Nuh-uh. Look. 306 00:10:26,326 --> 00:10:27,392 A's don't have right angles. 307 00:10:27,394 --> 00:10:30,328 You should know that 'cause you got an "A" in geometry. 308 00:10:30,330 --> 00:10:31,997 Well, here's something you should know. 309 00:10:31,999 --> 00:10:33,398 Give me a fistful of quarters 310 00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:35,900 before I give you a faceful of fist. 311 00:10:36,303 --> 00:10:36,935 (CLICKING) 312 00:10:36,937 --> 00:10:39,638 Oh, yeah, she's got nine A's, too. 313 00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:40,338 What? No way! 314 00:10:40,340 --> 00:10:41,539 I've got my report card right here. 315 00:10:41,541 --> 00:10:44,509 That's a napkin! Less talking, more clicking. 316 00:10:44,945 --> 00:10:46,111 (CLICKING) 317 00:10:46,113 --> 00:10:46,778 That's it. 318 00:10:46,780 --> 00:10:48,613 Look me in the eye as you do it. 319 00:10:49,349 --> 00:10:50,949 Don't you look away! 320 00:10:54,121 --> 00:10:55,353 ADULT ADAM: Still day one at my new job, 321 00:10:55,355 --> 00:10:58,590 and I was already feeling like it was "Game over." 322 00:10:58,592 --> 00:10:59,924 Dude, where'd all these people come from? 323 00:10:59,926 --> 00:11:01,960 Everybody heard I was giving out free money! 324 00:11:01,962 --> 00:11:03,595 But that's not even a report card! 325 00:11:03,597 --> 00:11:04,863 That's a Sbarro box! 326 00:11:04,865 --> 00:11:06,431 I know, Dave Kim! 327 00:11:06,433 --> 00:11:07,832 I've lost control. 328 00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:09,234 I'm gonna get fired. 329 00:11:09,236 --> 00:11:10,602 Oh, for sure. 330 00:11:10,904 --> 00:11:12,771 Ah, dang it! I'm all out! 331 00:11:12,773 --> 00:11:13,838 You're gonna need more quarters. 332 00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:17,142 Wait! I've got all the quarters in the world! 333 00:11:17,144 --> 00:11:18,276 I had the perfect plan. 334 00:11:18,278 --> 00:11:20,011 I would just borrow a couple quarters 335 00:11:20,013 --> 00:11:21,980 from the machine. Free quarters! 336 00:11:21,982 --> 00:11:24,482 Oh, God! Not part of the plan! 337 00:11:25,118 --> 00:11:26,685 What the hell is going on? 338 00:11:26,687 --> 00:11:28,253 It's a funny story, really. 339 00:11:28,255 --> 00:11:31,322 I gave out free money. (LAUGHS NERVOUSLY) 340 00:11:31,324 --> 00:11:32,757 It's not funny. 341 00:11:35,829 --> 00:11:38,229 Okay. Those beer helmets are clean enough. 342 00:11:38,231 --> 00:11:40,932 Go tidy up the naughty novelty section in the back. 343 00:11:40,934 --> 00:11:43,134 ERICA: No. There's creepos over there. 344 00:11:43,136 --> 00:11:44,736 And they're not buying anything. 345 00:11:44,738 --> 00:11:47,572 Erica, you're objecting to a direct order 346 00:11:47,574 --> 00:11:48,473 from your superior. 347 00:11:48,475 --> 00:11:50,341 Know what would happen if this was the army? 348 00:11:50,343 --> 00:11:53,111 Uh, this isn't the army. We sell butt mugs. 349 00:11:53,113 --> 00:11:53,845 Watch yourself. 350 00:11:53,847 --> 00:11:56,915 Oh, Leon, I'm gonna need the keys to the glass case. 351 00:11:56,917 --> 00:11:57,615 The glass case? 352 00:11:57,617 --> 00:12:00,318 With the pewter dragons holding the crystal balls? 353 00:12:00,320 --> 00:12:02,654 I haven't opened this case in years. 354 00:12:02,656 --> 00:12:05,423 Yeah, I saw this stupid goth kid in the mall, 355 00:12:05,425 --> 00:12:09,060 and I said to myself, "That kid'll buy a dragon." 356 00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:11,296 So I struck up a convo, and he's coming in. 357 00:12:11,298 --> 00:12:13,031 Oh, my God. 358 00:12:13,433 --> 00:12:15,333 Son, you've got it. 359 00:12:15,335 --> 00:12:16,668 The gift. 360 00:12:17,337 --> 00:12:18,670 The Spencer's gift. 361 00:12:18,672 --> 00:12:20,238 Come on. That's not a thing. 362 00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:22,140 (SNIFFLES) This is a big moment for me. 363 00:12:22,142 --> 00:12:25,910 (LAUGHING) I-I've never said this before. 364 00:12:25,912 --> 00:12:27,645 You can lock up tonight. You sure? 365 00:12:27,647 --> 00:12:31,216 I've never been more sure about anything in my life. 366 00:12:32,552 --> 00:12:33,818 You! 367 00:12:34,054 --> 00:12:35,520 Learn from him. 368 00:12:35,522 --> 00:12:36,988 He has the gift. 369 00:12:36,990 --> 00:12:38,289 Spencer's gift, sure. 370 00:12:38,291 --> 00:12:39,858 BARRY: Well, would you look at that. 371 00:12:39,860 --> 00:12:41,359 First, I'm made the boss. 372 00:12:41,361 --> 00:12:43,261 Now I get the keys to the store. 373 00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:45,196 I don't even have the keys to the house. 374 00:12:45,198 --> 00:12:47,732 I have to sit in the tree until someone comes home! 375 00:12:47,734 --> 00:12:48,867 I have to hand it to you, 376 00:12:48,869 --> 00:12:50,368 you really did out-spencer gifts me. 377 00:12:50,370 --> 00:12:52,837 Eh, don't feel bad. Not everyone has the gift. 378 00:12:52,839 --> 00:12:56,441 If anything, I feel bad you don't get to see Chuck Norris. 379 00:12:56,443 --> 00:12:58,343 Chuck Norris? What about him? 380 00:12:58,345 --> 00:13:00,678 Oh, he's signing his new book at B. Dalton. 381 00:13:00,680 --> 00:13:02,013 What's it called? 382 00:13:02,015 --> 00:13:02,614 Uh... 383 00:13:02,616 --> 00:13:04,649 "Punching America in the throat." 384 00:13:04,651 --> 00:13:05,316 Damn it! 385 00:13:05,318 --> 00:13:07,085 Why are the two most important things 386 00:13:07,087 --> 00:13:08,319 that ever happened to me tonight? 387 00:13:08,321 --> 00:13:10,822 I guess... I could cover for you. 388 00:13:10,991 --> 00:13:12,390 Thank you, Erica. 389 00:13:12,392 --> 00:13:14,025 You know, you're not a good employee, 390 00:13:14,027 --> 00:13:15,827 but you're an average sister. 391 00:13:15,829 --> 00:13:18,363 ADULT ADAM: Erica knew that in order to beat Barry, 392 00:13:18,365 --> 00:13:19,864 she'd have to play dirty. 393 00:13:19,866 --> 00:13:22,901 Meanwhile, I had to clean up the mess I made at work. 394 00:13:22,903 --> 00:13:23,601 It was terrible. 395 00:13:23,603 --> 00:13:25,370 They shook me down for all my quarters. 396 00:13:25,372 --> 00:13:27,338 Was one dressed like a ditzy redhead 397 00:13:27,340 --> 00:13:30,241 and the other like a smart-alec shoeshiner? 398 00:13:30,243 --> 00:13:32,477 Albert, not everything is a grift. 399 00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:33,978 Face it, Mom was right. 400 00:13:33,980 --> 00:13:35,680 I'm not qualified to do anything 401 00:13:35,682 --> 00:13:37,315 besides make stupid home movies. 402 00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:39,384 We can fix this, together. 403 00:13:39,386 --> 00:13:40,952 How much they get you for? 404 00:13:40,954 --> 00:13:41,486 $110. 405 00:13:41,488 --> 00:13:42,787 You're gonna fix this on your own. 406 00:13:42,789 --> 00:13:43,855 Fine. I'll think of something. 407 00:13:43,857 --> 00:13:44,789 Just don't tell Mom I got fired. 408 00:13:44,791 --> 00:13:49,294 Yes! I heard everything, thanks to Barry's stupid giant ear. 409 00:13:49,296 --> 00:13:52,030 Our Hollywood dreams are back on the table. 410 00:13:52,032 --> 00:13:52,630 (GROANS) (CHUCKLES) 411 00:13:52,632 --> 00:13:55,600 Mom, you got to stop. I just lost a real job. 412 00:13:55,602 --> 00:13:57,035 You know what else is real? 413 00:13:57,037 --> 00:13:59,337 You walking me down the red carpet 414 00:13:59,339 --> 00:13:59,971 at the Academy Awards. 415 00:13:59,973 --> 00:14:02,707 To be clear, if I ever get a job in show business, 416 00:14:02,709 --> 00:14:05,543 I am not taking you as my date to anything. 417 00:14:05,545 --> 00:14:07,478 Of course you are. (SCOFFS) I'm super not. 418 00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:09,981 Well, who else are you gonna take? Um, my wife? 419 00:14:09,983 --> 00:14:11,316 Oh, it's cool. She'll understand. 420 00:14:11,318 --> 00:14:13,318 No, she won't. I'll talk to her. She'll get it. 421 00:14:13,320 --> 00:14:15,320 You stay away from her. Seriously. 422 00:14:15,322 --> 00:14:16,521 She didn't sign up for this. 423 00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:18,590 So, what, I'm the only one who believes in you, 424 00:14:18,592 --> 00:14:19,991 but I have to read about your successes 425 00:14:19,993 --> 00:14:23,161 in People magazine, like some poor slob at a dentist's office? 426 00:14:23,163 --> 00:14:25,263 I'll tell you before the article comes out, okay? 427 00:14:25,265 --> 00:14:28,366 If I pay back the arcade, can I go to the Oscars then? 428 00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:31,069 You can ride with me and my wife in the limo, 429 00:14:31,071 --> 00:14:33,671 but you can't go in. I'll find a way. 430 00:14:33,673 --> 00:14:35,440 No! You're not bailing him out of this. 431 00:14:35,442 --> 00:14:37,475 This is his job, not yours. 432 00:14:37,477 --> 00:14:39,644 You got to find a way to solve it on your own. 433 00:14:39,646 --> 00:14:43,014 And I just did, by trading in my future happiness for cash. 434 00:14:43,016 --> 00:14:45,450 Here's your money, plus a little extra 435 00:14:45,452 --> 00:14:47,252 because you're a special boy. 436 00:14:47,254 --> 00:14:48,553 Hey, my special-boy money! 437 00:14:48,555 --> 00:14:49,687 I'm gonna be brutal here 438 00:14:49,689 --> 00:14:51,122 because your mom's in la-la land. 439 00:14:51,124 --> 00:14:54,259 You're not a boy, and you're not special! 440 00:14:54,261 --> 00:14:55,426 What are you saying? 441 00:14:55,428 --> 00:14:57,528 He's not some magic star. 442 00:14:57,530 --> 00:14:58,963 He's a regular Joe 443 00:14:58,965 --> 00:15:02,100 who's got to learn the value of a hard day's work. 444 00:15:02,102 --> 00:15:04,569 By wearing wigs and making home movies. 445 00:15:04,571 --> 00:15:07,071 Oh, my God! What are you doing to this kid? 446 00:15:07,073 --> 00:15:08,106 I'm being his mother. 447 00:15:08,108 --> 00:15:09,707 Well, I'm being his father. 448 00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:11,009 Welcome to reality. 449 00:15:11,011 --> 00:15:12,744 You go down to that job, 450 00:15:12,746 --> 00:15:15,380 and you solve it any way you can! 451 00:15:19,920 --> 00:15:21,352 Solve it! 452 00:15:22,589 --> 00:15:23,488 What a rip! 453 00:15:23,490 --> 00:15:24,923 Chuck Norris wasn't even there, 454 00:15:24,925 --> 00:15:26,791 just some lady named Maya Angelou. 455 00:15:26,793 --> 00:15:28,693 She didn't know anything about karate. 456 00:15:28,695 --> 00:15:31,129 Barry. We need to talk. 457 00:15:31,598 --> 00:15:32,864 Leon. What are you doing back? 458 00:15:32,866 --> 00:15:35,333 Someone paged me to come back to the store. 459 00:15:35,335 --> 00:15:38,336 When I got here, you were gone... 460 00:15:38,338 --> 00:15:40,004 And so were all the bottled farts. 461 00:15:40,006 --> 00:15:41,940 Oh, no! Not the bottled farts! 462 00:15:41,942 --> 00:15:42,707 Yes, the bottled farts. 463 00:15:42,709 --> 00:15:45,743 When I saw all the bottled farts were gone, I was excited. 464 00:15:45,745 --> 00:15:47,545 I thought you sold the bottled farts. 465 00:15:47,547 --> 00:15:50,648 But now it seems you lost the bottled farts. 466 00:15:50,650 --> 00:15:52,050 I'd never lose the bottled farts. 467 00:15:52,052 --> 00:15:54,686 Barry, do you understand that each bottled fart 468 00:15:54,688 --> 00:15:58,056 was ass-crafted by a third-generation fartist 469 00:15:58,058 --> 00:15:59,190 in Pueblo, Colorado? 470 00:15:59,192 --> 00:16:00,725 So they just fart into the bottles? 471 00:16:00,727 --> 00:16:03,328 Oh, it's so much more than that. 472 00:16:03,330 --> 00:16:08,366 Inside every bottled fart lives a child's wish. 473 00:16:08,368 --> 00:16:11,102 And now all those wishes have vanished, 474 00:16:11,104 --> 00:16:14,305 like... Something in the wind. 475 00:16:14,307 --> 00:16:15,606 A squeaky fart? 476 00:16:15,608 --> 00:16:16,307 Damn it. 477 00:16:16,309 --> 00:16:18,910 No one gets it like you, Barry. 478 00:16:19,479 --> 00:16:21,612 But I still need that name tag. 479 00:16:21,614 --> 00:16:25,350 Wait! You can't fire him for just losing some farts. 480 00:16:25,352 --> 00:16:27,885 It's not about the farts. 481 00:16:28,421 --> 00:16:30,488 It's about trust. 482 00:16:31,091 --> 00:16:33,591 You broke my heart, son. 483 00:16:34,728 --> 00:16:35,360 You did this. 484 00:16:35,362 --> 00:16:37,895 You couldn't deal with the fact that I was better than you, 485 00:16:37,897 --> 00:16:41,666 that I was good at something, that I'll be a doctor one day. 486 00:16:41,668 --> 00:16:44,102 Barry... No! Just don't talk to me. 487 00:16:47,774 --> 00:16:49,440 ADULT ADAM: My arcade job was a bust, 488 00:16:49,442 --> 00:16:51,909 but I had the perfect way to get my money back. 489 00:16:51,911 --> 00:16:54,312 Yo, ponytail! Give me my damn money! 490 00:16:54,314 --> 00:16:56,214 No. Okay, that didn't work. 491 00:16:56,216 --> 00:16:58,516 Please do the right thing and give me my money. 492 00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:01,753 I've considered your offer, and I have a counteroffer. 493 00:17:01,755 --> 00:17:02,120 Eat my butt. 494 00:17:02,122 --> 00:17:04,389 I totally thought you were gonna do the right thing, 495 00:17:04,391 --> 00:17:05,323 and then you offered your butt! 496 00:17:05,325 --> 00:17:07,992 Can you guys please just give me the money back? 497 00:17:07,994 --> 00:17:10,395 Sorry, man. I need that money to feed my family. 498 00:17:10,397 --> 00:17:12,263 Really? No. My dad's a lawyer. 499 00:17:12,265 --> 00:17:14,165 He has that commercial where he wears a neck brace 500 00:17:14,167 --> 00:17:16,768 and tells you his number is dos dos dos, dos dos dos, 501 00:17:16,770 --> 00:17:17,702 dos dos dos dos. 502 00:17:17,704 --> 00:17:20,204 Wait! That's it! I know how to fix this! 503 00:17:20,206 --> 00:17:21,706 Is it by you giving us more quarters? 504 00:17:21,708 --> 00:17:25,076 No, but what if I told you I could make you stars? 505 00:17:25,078 --> 00:17:27,879 Johnny's already a star. You're a star, Johnny. 506 00:17:27,881 --> 00:17:29,881 I know, girl. Everybody knows. 507 00:17:29,883 --> 00:17:30,515 So, you'll do it? 508 00:17:30,517 --> 00:17:33,151 Sure. But I got two questions for you. 509 00:17:33,153 --> 00:17:34,619 Can I play my sax? 510 00:17:34,621 --> 00:17:36,888 And how loud can I play my sax? 511 00:17:36,890 --> 00:17:38,156 (MUSIC PLAYING) 512 00:17:38,158 --> 00:17:39,190 Yeah! 513 00:17:39,192 --> 00:17:41,292 Do you like video games? 514 00:17:41,294 --> 00:17:42,427 Do you like girls? 515 00:17:42,429 --> 00:17:45,596 Do you like girls who like video games? 516 00:17:46,032 --> 00:17:46,998 Hey, big boy. 517 00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:49,233 How 'bout we make that two-player? 518 00:17:49,235 --> 00:17:50,535 Well, all right. 519 00:17:50,537 --> 00:17:53,004 Come on down to Challenges Arcade. 520 00:17:53,006 --> 00:17:57,508 All the latest games, from Asteroids to Zaxxon. 521 00:17:57,510 --> 00:17:59,243 Did somebody say "Zaxxon"? 522 00:17:59,245 --> 00:18:01,379 More like sax-on. 523 00:18:01,381 --> 00:18:03,414 (SAXOPHONE SOLO) 524 00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:07,351 Dude, this commercial's gonna be awesome. 525 00:18:07,353 --> 00:18:09,954 Commercial, huh? Not a bad idea. 526 00:18:09,956 --> 00:18:11,656 And it can be yours for only $5,000. 527 00:18:11,658 --> 00:18:15,827 How about no dollars and you can have your job back? 528 00:18:16,262 --> 00:18:17,562 Deal. 529 00:18:19,365 --> 00:18:20,631 Hey. 530 00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:21,666 Go away, fart thief. 531 00:18:21,668 --> 00:18:23,901 Well, maybe this will cheer you up. 532 00:18:24,704 --> 00:18:26,604 Huh? Whoopee cushion? 533 00:18:26,606 --> 00:18:27,338 Bug in an ice cube? 534 00:18:27,340 --> 00:18:29,574 Even though all those items are hilarious, 535 00:18:29,576 --> 00:18:31,576 you can't make up for what you did. 536 00:18:31,578 --> 00:18:33,111 (SIGHS) 537 00:18:34,647 --> 00:18:36,214 Okay, fine. 538 00:18:36,216 --> 00:18:38,049 I paged Leon, and... 539 00:18:38,051 --> 00:18:42,019 I hid all of the stinky bottles in the stockroom. 540 00:18:42,689 --> 00:18:45,323 I did it because I was jealous. 541 00:18:45,325 --> 00:18:48,459 You're better at Spencer's Gifts than me. 542 00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:49,260 And I'm sorry. 543 00:18:49,262 --> 00:18:51,028 I-I don't want another gag gift. 544 00:18:51,030 --> 00:18:52,864 No, it's a real one. 545 00:18:54,267 --> 00:18:56,601 (TRUE COLORS PLAYING) 546 00:18:56,603 --> 00:18:59,704 A stethoscope? For when you're a doctor. 547 00:19:00,106 --> 00:19:01,606 You don't believe that. 548 00:19:01,608 --> 00:19:03,841 Look, I know I'm always really hard on you, 549 00:19:03,843 --> 00:19:06,410 but watching you at that job made me see 550 00:19:06,412 --> 00:19:09,447 that when you're passionate about something, 551 00:19:09,549 --> 00:19:11,215 you can do anything. 552 00:19:11,217 --> 00:19:13,751 So you're gonna be a doctor, all right? 553 00:19:15,788 --> 00:19:17,722 And a damn good one. 554 00:19:18,258 --> 00:19:20,391 You may not be a good employee, 555 00:19:20,393 --> 00:19:22,326 but you're a great sister. 556 00:19:24,497 --> 00:19:27,465 ANNOUNCER: Challenges arcade, Willow Grove Park Mall. 557 00:19:27,467 --> 00:19:29,000 Is this going on TV? 558 00:19:29,002 --> 00:19:30,468 My boss bought local air time, 559 00:19:30,470 --> 00:19:32,436 and now the manager of Spencer's Gifts 560 00:19:32,438 --> 00:19:34,505 wants me to shoot one for him, too. 561 00:19:34,807 --> 00:19:36,307 Oh, my baby! 562 00:19:36,309 --> 00:19:38,376 Told you, Murray! He is special! 563 00:19:38,378 --> 00:19:40,978 That's his job, being amazing! 564 00:19:40,980 --> 00:19:44,248 You know, I think I'm gonna keep my actual job at the arcade. 565 00:19:44,250 --> 00:19:45,283 What? Truth is, without it, 566 00:19:45,285 --> 00:19:48,386 I never would have gotten my first real directing gig. 567 00:19:48,388 --> 00:19:50,354 Dad's right, a real job is a good thing. 568 00:19:50,356 --> 00:19:53,224 Well, you're still gonna take me to the Oscars, though, right? 569 00:19:53,226 --> 00:19:54,392 I'm taking my wife. 570 00:19:54,394 --> 00:19:55,826 You'll take me to the Emmys. 571 00:19:55,828 --> 00:19:57,428 Eh, I'm taking my wife. 572 00:19:57,430 --> 00:19:59,530 Sure you are. 573 00:19:59,799 --> 00:20:00,932 Bevy. 574 00:20:00,934 --> 00:20:01,766 Fine. I'll stop. 575 00:20:01,768 --> 00:20:04,368 You know, your mom may be onto something. 576 00:20:04,370 --> 00:20:08,839 You might be more special than I'm giving you credit for. 577 00:20:08,841 --> 00:20:09,707 You really think so? 578 00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:11,742 Don't get a big head about it. 579 00:20:11,744 --> 00:20:14,011 But, yeah, keep making your movies 580 00:20:14,013 --> 00:20:16,981 with the, uh, singing and the wigs. 581 00:20:16,983 --> 00:20:18,549 I thought you hate the wigs. 582 00:20:18,551 --> 00:20:21,319 Oh, I... I really hate the wigs. 583 00:20:22,255 --> 00:20:24,855 ADULT ADAM: Sometimes the people who push us the hardest 584 00:20:24,857 --> 00:20:26,724 are the most encouraging of all. 585 00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:27,758 Sure, growing up's messy, 586 00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:29,560 but when we accept the love around us, 587 00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:32,196 that's when our true colors shine brightest. 588 00:20:32,198 --> 00:20:37,501 ¶ And I see your true colors shining through 589 00:20:38,171 --> 00:20:41,339 ¶ I see your true colors 590 00:20:41,341 --> 00:20:43,708 ¶ And that's why I love you 591 00:20:43,710 --> 00:20:49,647 ¶ So don't be afraid to let them show ¶ 592 00:20:50,750 --> 00:20:54,518 Come on down to Spencer's Gifts at the Willow Grove Mall, 593 00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:59,023 where our gag gifts are a sight for sore eyes. 594 00:20:59,025 --> 00:21:00,124 Spencer's! 595 00:21:00,126 --> 00:21:01,492 We've got fake barf! 596 00:21:01,494 --> 00:21:02,793 Underpants wallet! 597 00:21:02,795 --> 00:21:04,128 Real lava lamps! 598 00:21:04,130 --> 00:21:05,830 Whoopie cushions! (AIR HISSES) 599 00:21:05,832 --> 00:21:07,698 Joy buzzers! Ow. (BUZZING) 600 00:21:07,700 --> 00:21:08,899 "No fart zone" tape. 601 00:21:08,901 --> 00:21:11,702 Wind-up chattering teeth! (CHATTERING) 602 00:21:11,871 --> 00:21:13,404 Wacky shirts! 603 00:21:13,406 --> 00:21:14,372 Silly wigs! 604 00:21:14,374 --> 00:21:15,139 Edible underpants! 605 00:21:15,141 --> 00:21:18,309 And, of course, our best seller... 606 00:21:19,212 --> 00:21:20,478 Bottled farts! 607 00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:22,213 And for the woman in your life, 608 00:21:22,215 --> 00:21:25,750 we have lilac hand lotion, for some reason. (CHUCKLES) 609 00:21:25,752 --> 00:21:28,252 So, come on down to Spencer's. 610 00:21:28,254 --> 00:21:30,921 ALL: We've got shenanigans for you!