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00:00:00,067 --> 00:00:03,202
ADULT ADAM: My brother Barry
was the world champion
of the Goldberg house.
2
00:00:03,204 --> 00:00:06,338
Athletics flowed
through his veins.
3
00:00:06,340 --> 00:00:06,739
Sports!
4
00:00:06,741 --> 00:00:09,575
Yep, in our family,
Barry was the undisputed jock,
5
00:00:09,577 --> 00:00:12,845
mainly 'cause
I never disputed it.
6
00:00:12,847 --> 00:00:13,846
Swish, baby!
7
00:00:13,848 --> 00:00:15,381
Holy balls!
8
00:00:15,383 --> 00:00:17,416
It only took 173 tries!
9
00:00:17,418 --> 00:00:19,351
It took Dr. J 200 times.
10
00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:22,154
Don't look it up.
Just take my words as fact.
11
00:00:22,156 --> 00:00:22,955
Calling my shot.
12
00:00:22,957 --> 00:00:25,691
Right-field bleachers.
Give it to me, Adam.
13
00:00:25,693 --> 00:00:27,059
Come on, baby!
14
00:00:27,061 --> 00:00:27,793
He had it all.
15
00:00:27,795 --> 00:00:30,562
Strength, passion,
and delusion.
16
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Yes! Left field,
which is your right,
17
00:00:33,467 --> 00:00:34,266
so it still counts!
18
00:00:34,268 --> 00:00:37,169
Dude, how do the Phillies
not recruit you right now,
19
00:00:37,171 --> 00:00:38,003
fresh out of high school?
20
00:00:38,005 --> 00:00:39,405
That's what I ask
when I call them!
21
00:00:39,407 --> 00:00:42,174
Truth was, I may have been
a tad responsible
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00:00:42,176 --> 00:00:43,609
for over-inflating his ego.
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00:00:43,611 --> 00:00:45,544
Tonight,
we celebrate excellence
24
00:00:45,546 --> 00:00:46,779
on and off the field.
25
00:00:46,781 --> 00:00:49,014
I give you
the William Penn Academy
26
00:00:49,016 --> 00:00:50,549
Athlete of the Year.
27
00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:52,851
Not only is this student
a gifted sportsman,
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00:00:52,853 --> 00:00:54,887
but he's a born leader,
and, damn it,
29
00:00:54,889 --> 00:00:55,788
I'd follow him anywhere.
30
00:00:55,790 --> 00:00:58,257
Snap some photos
after he calls my name.
31
00:00:58,259 --> 00:01:00,859
Of course, you all know
who I'm talking about.
32
00:01:00,861 --> 00:01:02,628
Ruben Amaro, Jr.
33
00:01:02,630 --> 00:01:05,898
Boom! Yes! Yes!
34
00:01:05,900 --> 00:01:08,634
(EXHALING SHARPLY)
Yes!
35
00:01:10,137 --> 00:01:14,440
Student athletes,
parents, faculty,
36
00:01:14,442 --> 00:01:15,274
and distinguished guests,
37
00:01:15,276 --> 00:01:18,644
I am privileged and honored
to accept this award.
38
00:01:18,646 --> 00:01:20,245
Goldberg, what the hell
are you doing?
39
00:01:20,247 --> 00:01:21,914
I said Rubén Amaro, Jr.
40
00:01:21,916 --> 00:01:23,816
What? How is that
even possible?
41
00:01:23,818 --> 00:01:26,652
Well, he's
an athletic superstar,
42
00:01:26,654 --> 00:01:27,986
and you are our mascot.
43
00:01:27,988 --> 00:01:32,057
Now put on the giant head
and dance for our champ.
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00:01:32,059 --> 00:01:33,926
(APPLAUSE)
45
00:01:38,866 --> 00:01:40,232
This is bullcrap.
46
00:01:40,234 --> 00:01:42,301
What does
Ruben Amaro, Jr. have
47
00:01:42,303 --> 00:01:43,135
that I don't?
48
00:01:43,137 --> 00:01:45,037
Um, four-year varsity
letterman in baseball,
49
00:01:45,039 --> 00:01:47,239
the home-run record,
and I'm pretty sure he's got
50
00:01:47,241 --> 00:01:48,207
a full scholarship
to Stanford.
51
00:01:48,209 --> 00:01:51,276
Anyone could play baseball.
I play Wiffle.
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00:01:51,278 --> 00:01:53,212
Yes, the only sport
where the equipment
53
00:01:53,214 --> 00:01:54,146
is sold in a pharmacy.
54
00:01:54,148 --> 00:01:56,181
Well, at the very least,
Coach should recognize
55
00:01:56,183 --> 00:01:56,882
my insane hoop skills.
56
00:01:56,884 --> 00:01:58,917
Sweetie, you're not even
on the basketball team.
57
00:01:58,919 --> 00:01:59,918
'Cause I play street ball.
58
00:01:59,920 --> 00:02:02,888
My flash and pizzazz can't
be contained in a gymnasium.
59
00:02:02,890 --> 00:02:04,823
And don't get me started
on my boomerang skills.
60
00:02:04,825 --> 00:02:08,460
I won't.
I'd like to see
Ruben Amaro, Jr.
61
00:02:08,462 --> 00:02:09,595
chuck a 'rang.
62
00:02:09,597 --> 00:02:10,829
Stupid, selfish showboat.
63
00:02:10,831 --> 00:02:13,599
This night was supposed to be
about Barry Goldberg.
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00:02:13,601 --> 00:02:15,100
I don't think it was.
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00:02:15,102 --> 00:02:18,203
But hey,
you'll always be my champion.
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00:02:18,205 --> 00:02:19,972
That's just worthless.
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00:02:19,974 --> 00:02:20,472
But thank you.
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00:02:20,474 --> 00:02:22,808
Barry's dream of becoming
an athletic superstar
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00:02:22,810 --> 00:02:25,110
was at an all-time low,
but that all changed
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00:02:25,112 --> 00:02:27,446
when he watched
the biggest underdog story
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00:02:27,448 --> 00:02:30,149
in Olympic history
on the news.
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00:02:30,151 --> 00:02:32,317
The story of Eddie the Eagle.
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00:02:32,319 --> 00:02:33,285
Look at him go, Lucky.
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00:02:33,287 --> 00:02:36,455
A week ago, nobody knew
who this guy was.
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00:02:36,457 --> 00:02:38,023
But today, he's a legend.
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00:02:38,025 --> 00:02:40,559
A legend that would
inspire my brother
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00:02:40,561 --> 00:02:42,394
on his path to greatness.
78
00:02:42,396 --> 00:02:44,229
Is that guy
wearing his glasses
79
00:02:44,231 --> 00:02:45,864
under his ski goggles?
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00:02:45,866 --> 00:02:47,032
That's Eddie the Eagle.
81
00:02:47,034 --> 00:02:48,634
He's an actual
Olympic athlete.
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00:02:48,636 --> 00:02:51,503
How? He looks like a guy
that works at the post office.
83
00:02:51,505 --> 00:02:54,540
Exactly. He's the only dude
from England
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00:02:54,542 --> 00:02:55,674
to do ski-jumping.
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00:02:55,676 --> 00:02:56,775
This nobody just walked
right into
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00:02:56,777 --> 00:02:59,411
Olympic Glory.
(VANGELIS'
CHARIOTS OF FIRE PLAYS)
87
00:02:59,413 --> 00:03:02,781
This changes everything.
88
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You're right!
I'm gonna be a champion!
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00:03:06,287 --> 00:03:09,688
Olympics, here I come,
baby!
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00:03:10,191 --> 00:03:11,623
Watch out.
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00:03:13,194 --> 00:03:14,893
Champi...
(MUSIC STOPS)
92
00:03:14,895 --> 00:03:17,496
God, those are steep.
(PANTING)
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00:03:17,998 --> 00:03:19,631
Champion!
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00:03:19,633 --> 00:03:20,666
¶ I'm twisted up inside
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00:03:20,668 --> 00:03:25,003
¶ But nonetheless
I feel the need to say
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00:03:27,041 --> 00:03:27,973
¶ I don't know the future
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00:03:27,975 --> 00:03:31,476
¶ But the past keeps getting
clearer every day ¶
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00:03:31,478 --> 00:03:33,612
It was February 24th,
1980-something,
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00:03:33,614 --> 00:03:38,750
and my dad was doing what
he did best. Saving money.
100
00:03:38,752 --> 00:03:42,921
Which one of you morons
cranked up the heat to 55?
101
00:03:42,923 --> 00:03:44,289
How is that cranked up?
102
00:03:44,291 --> 00:03:46,491
I'm wearing my
Spider-Man long underwear,
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00:03:46,493 --> 00:03:48,860
which, yes, feels like
a fun little secret,
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00:03:48,862 --> 00:03:51,129
but it shouldn't be necessary
in the house.
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00:03:51,131 --> 00:03:53,865
He's right, Mur.
It's freezing in here.
106
00:03:53,867 --> 00:03:55,434
At least start a fire.
107
00:03:55,436 --> 00:03:56,134
Are you nuts?
108
00:03:56,136 --> 00:03:57,603
You think firewood
grows on trees?
109
00:03:57,605 --> 00:04:01,573
Yes, that's what
trees are. Wood.
110
00:04:01,575 --> 00:04:03,542
Well, keep your hands off.
111
00:04:03,544 --> 00:04:04,676
And turn off the damn lights!
112
00:04:04,678 --> 00:04:07,212
We don't support
the electric company.
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00:04:07,214 --> 00:04:08,747
ADAM: Hey,
we're still in here.
114
00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:10,849
It's after 6:00!
Go to bed!
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00:04:10,851 --> 00:04:13,318
My dad had always been frugal,
but lately,
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00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:14,119
he was getting worse.
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00:04:14,121 --> 00:04:15,287
MURRAY: Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa.
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00:04:15,289 --> 00:04:18,590
That's two whole ounces
of milk right there.
119
00:04:18,592 --> 00:04:19,291
Pour it back.
120
00:04:19,293 --> 00:04:21,627
But it's blue
from all the Boo Berry.
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00:04:21,629 --> 00:04:24,930
Berries are healthy.
Pour it back.
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00:04:24,932 --> 00:04:27,499
Even his co-workers
at the furniture store
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00:04:27,501 --> 00:04:29,668
were feeling the squeeze.
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00:04:29,670 --> 00:04:31,903
Hi. Picking up
or dropping...
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00:04:31,905 --> 00:04:33,805
Oh, God, it's you!
126
00:04:33,807 --> 00:04:34,740
Hello? Vic?
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00:04:34,742 --> 00:04:36,808
We're closed.
Come back later.
128
00:04:36,810 --> 00:04:38,677
Vic, I see you.
129
00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:40,112
(CHUCKLES)
130
00:04:40,114 --> 00:04:42,114
What are you doing
in a photo shack?
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00:04:42,116 --> 00:04:45,083
Murray kind of
cut back my hours.
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00:04:45,085 --> 00:04:46,118
Oh, no.
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00:04:46,120 --> 00:04:47,853
Is it 'cause
you're so terrible
134
00:04:47,855 --> 00:04:49,054
at selling furniture?
135
00:04:49,056 --> 00:04:51,456
No. Wait,
does Murray say that?
136
00:04:51,458 --> 00:04:53,859
Are things not going well
at the store?
137
00:04:53,861 --> 00:04:55,060
Oh, well, you know
the furniture game.
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00:04:55,062 --> 00:04:58,230
(CHUCKLES) It's...
But, no, they're not.
139
00:04:58,232 --> 00:05:00,265
But do me a favor.
What?
140
00:05:00,267 --> 00:05:02,367
Don't tell Murray
you heard it from me, okay?
141
00:05:02,369 --> 00:05:04,503
Of course, Vic.
I permiss.
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00:05:04,505 --> 00:05:06,204
Did you just say
"permiss"?
143
00:05:06,206 --> 00:05:08,907
No, I said "I pormiss."
144
00:05:08,909 --> 00:05:10,242
Por...Por...
145
00:05:10,244 --> 00:05:10,976
I pormiss.
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00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:12,477
Got to go!
Wait, what?
147
00:05:12,479 --> 00:05:13,345
(TIRES SCREECH)
148
00:05:13,347 --> 00:05:15,947
My mom wasn't one
to break a promise.
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00:05:15,949 --> 00:05:19,217
A "pormiss"
was a different story.
150
00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:21,086
Hey! Bevy!
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00:05:21,088 --> 00:05:22,754
What a fun surprise!
152
00:05:22,756 --> 00:05:25,624
Yeah. Just came to see
the big guy in action.
153
00:05:25,626 --> 00:05:27,559
(CHUCKLES)
So, how's it going?
154
00:05:27,561 --> 00:05:29,895
Hoo-hoo!
Been slammed.
155
00:05:29,897 --> 00:05:32,064
Slammed, huh?
156
00:05:32,199 --> 00:05:34,199
Must have
missed the rush.
157
00:05:34,201 --> 00:05:35,767
Well, you know,
it comes in waves.
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00:05:35,769 --> 00:05:38,937
As a matter of fact,
I should get back to work.
159
00:05:38,939 --> 00:05:41,340
Oh, so, so busy.
160
00:05:41,342 --> 00:05:42,674
Sold two of these.
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00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:43,942
This baby? Gone.
162
00:05:43,944 --> 00:05:45,377
Sold it. Shouldn't have been
sitting in it.
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00:05:45,379 --> 00:05:47,145
And you're not gonna
believe this.
164
00:05:47,147 --> 00:05:49,348
Somebody bought a register!
165
00:05:49,350 --> 00:05:51,783
Ka-ching, ka-ching, ka-ching!
Look at us!
166
00:05:51,785 --> 00:05:54,319
As my dad was hiding
his troubles from my mom,
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00:05:54,321 --> 00:05:57,589
Barry was unleashing
his inner champion.
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00:05:57,591 --> 00:05:59,257
What's with the board,
douche lords?
169
00:05:59,259 --> 00:06:00,625
Just deciding
which Olympic sport
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00:06:00,627 --> 00:06:03,161
will make Barry
a national hero.
171
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Deal with it!
172
00:06:04,598 --> 00:06:05,263
Okay, stop.
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00:06:05,265 --> 00:06:06,498
You're not
Eddie the Eagle,
174
00:06:06,500 --> 00:06:09,735
and you're never gonna
win at...curling?
175
00:06:09,737 --> 00:06:10,502
What the hell is that?
176
00:06:10,504 --> 00:06:11,870
Isn't it genius?
No one knows.
177
00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:15,107
It's a sport where you sweep
a rock across a sheet of ice.
178
00:06:15,109 --> 00:06:18,143
It takes incredible
focus and patience.
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00:06:18,145 --> 00:06:19,845
Mmm...
180
00:06:19,847 --> 00:06:22,013
Moving on.
How about dressage?
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00:06:22,015 --> 00:06:24,683
Yes! I'll win the gold
at whatever that is!
182
00:06:24,685 --> 00:06:25,650
It's an equestrian event,
183
00:06:25,652 --> 00:06:27,986
which is the elegant art
of horse dancing.
184
00:06:27,988 --> 00:06:31,356
I told you, bro!
I will never
dance with a horse!
185
00:06:31,358 --> 00:06:31,923
Never!
186
00:06:31,925 --> 00:06:33,859
What is your deal
with horses?
187
00:06:33,861 --> 00:06:35,494
They know what they did.
188
00:06:35,496 --> 00:06:39,064
You're right. Moving on.
Rhythmic gymnastics.
189
00:06:39,066 --> 00:06:40,465
Oh, you mean
ribbon dancing?
190
00:06:40,467 --> 00:06:42,801
Yes, please do that.
I beg you.
191
00:06:42,803 --> 00:06:46,938
I sense your mocking tone.
You know who else got mocked?
192
00:06:46,940 --> 00:06:49,775
Edward "Eddie the Eagle"
Edwards.
193
00:06:49,777 --> 00:06:51,443
His name is
Edward Edwards?
194
00:06:51,445 --> 00:06:53,145
Look, I don't know
all the details.
195
00:06:53,147 --> 00:06:55,380
I'm just basing
my life on him. Geez.
196
00:06:55,382 --> 00:06:58,049
In that case,
let's get you a ribbon.
197
00:06:58,051 --> 00:07:00,585
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
198
00:07:00,587 --> 00:07:03,588
It's everything I thought
it would be and more.
199
00:07:04,792 --> 00:07:07,359
The ribbon just takes me
where it wants.
200
00:07:09,663 --> 00:07:10,429
Look at him go.
(THUD)
201
00:07:10,431 --> 00:07:13,632
(GASPING)
Not part of the routine.
Help me!
202
00:07:13,634 --> 00:07:16,101
Don't worry.
We'll find
a sport for you.
203
00:07:16,103 --> 00:07:17,536
How are you
with skiing and guns?
204
00:07:17,538 --> 00:07:18,970
Never done it,
but I'm awesome at it.
205
00:07:18,972 --> 00:07:20,472
Stop. Just stop.
Admit it.
206
00:07:20,474 --> 00:07:23,475
The only sport you're good at
is that stupid brother game
207
00:07:23,477 --> 00:07:26,144
you invented to beat
the crap out of each other.
208
00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:27,612
BOTH: Ball-Ball!
209
00:07:27,614 --> 00:07:28,580
Ball-Ball!
One awesome thing about
210
00:07:28,582 --> 00:07:31,850
having an older brother
was the sports we'd make up.
211
00:07:31,852 --> 00:07:32,417
Racquet round!
212
00:07:32,419 --> 00:07:34,753
The rules were endless
and complicated...
213
00:07:34,755 --> 00:07:35,187
Sleep!
214
00:07:35,189 --> 00:07:37,622
...but no matter what,
you had to yell...
215
00:07:37,624 --> 00:07:38,890
Ball-Ball!
216
00:07:38,892 --> 00:07:39,424
Yes!
217
00:07:39,426 --> 00:07:40,892
Dude, you're unbeatable!
218
00:07:40,894 --> 00:07:42,294
This is the answer,
Erica!
219
00:07:42,296 --> 00:07:43,962
If I get Ball-Ball
into the Olympics,
220
00:07:43,964 --> 00:07:44,930
you'll know I'll bring home
the gold.
221
00:07:44,932 --> 00:07:48,333
Giant problem. Some dumbass
game you play in the basement
222
00:07:48,335 --> 00:07:49,701
will never be
an Olympic sport.
223
00:07:49,703 --> 00:07:51,603
That's what they said
about soccer.
224
00:07:51,605 --> 00:07:53,205
He's right. I heard that.
No, you didn't.
225
00:07:53,207 --> 00:07:56,775
I didn't, but he said it
with such confidence I agree.
226
00:07:56,777 --> 00:07:59,177
We will rule the world!
227
00:07:59,179 --> 00:07:59,511
Ugh!
228
00:07:59,513 --> 00:08:01,880
While my brother had found
his road to gold,
229
00:08:01,882 --> 00:08:02,614
my mother was worried
230
00:08:02,616 --> 00:08:04,583
my dad was
on the road to ruin.
231
00:08:04,585 --> 00:08:06,785
You should have seen
the store, Dad.
232
00:08:06,787 --> 00:08:07,552
Completely abandoned.
233
00:08:07,554 --> 00:08:10,889
I just don't understand
why he won't ask me for help.
234
00:08:10,891 --> 00:08:13,058
This is how Murray's dad
raised him.
235
00:08:13,060 --> 00:08:15,827
Be proud.
Don't ask for a hand-out.
236
00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:16,528
Solve it yourself.
237
00:08:16,530 --> 00:08:19,364
Well, you raised me to offer
support and guidance
238
00:08:19,366 --> 00:08:23,101
and strong-arm anyone
into doing
exactly what I want.
239
00:08:23,103 --> 00:08:25,737
That's what you thought
I meant when I said,
240
00:08:25,739 --> 00:08:27,439
"Follow your dreams"?
241
00:08:27,441 --> 00:08:27,906
Yes.
242
00:08:27,908 --> 00:08:29,374
My dad was too proud
to ask for help,
243
00:08:29,376 --> 00:08:32,911
so my mom decided
to force it on him.
244
00:08:34,248 --> 00:08:34,980
Bevy!
245
00:08:34,982 --> 00:08:35,881
(BELL DINGS)
Hello, Murray.
246
00:08:35,883 --> 00:08:38,517
I see you found the solution
to all your problems.
247
00:08:38,519 --> 00:08:41,620
What am I looking at?
I'm confused and angry.
248
00:08:41,622 --> 00:08:43,255
It's a fa-ton.
A what?
249
00:08:43,257 --> 00:08:44,723
A fa-ton.
Fa-ton?
250
00:08:44,725 --> 00:08:46,091
Fa-ton.
Fa-ton.
251
00:08:46,093 --> 00:08:47,826
Fa-ton?
Fa-ton.
252
00:08:47,828 --> 00:08:49,194
A what?
Fa-ton.
253
00:08:49,196 --> 00:08:50,262
It's Japanese.
254
00:08:50,264 --> 00:08:52,964
It's a couch but also...
255
00:08:53,233 --> 00:08:55,433
a bed!
It's the origami
of furniture.
256
00:08:55,435 --> 00:08:59,471
What is it doing
in the only room
in the world that I like?
257
00:08:59,473 --> 00:09:01,840
Murray, I know
about the furniture store.
258
00:09:01,842 --> 00:09:05,911
I saw Vic in that
tiny little photo house.
259
00:09:05,913 --> 00:09:06,444
It was sad.
260
00:09:06,446 --> 00:09:08,813
Look, I don't need
anyone's help.
261
00:09:08,815 --> 00:09:11,683
And I definitely
don't need a fa-ton.
262
00:09:11,685 --> 00:09:13,685
Just one
(BLEEP) fa-ton.
263
00:09:13,687 --> 00:09:14,753
No fa-tons.
264
00:09:14,755 --> 00:09:17,422
As my dad was refusing help
to sell furniture,
265
00:09:17,424 --> 00:09:20,892
Barry was hoping to sell
Ball-Ball to the masses.
266
00:09:20,894 --> 00:09:22,994
Friends, JTP...
267
00:09:22,996 --> 00:09:25,263
TOGETHER: JTP!
...girlfriend,
268
00:09:25,265 --> 00:09:26,031
ponytail burnouts.
269
00:09:26,033 --> 00:09:27,966
I've gathered you here today
Sup?
270
00:09:27,968 --> 00:09:29,768
'cause you're the
taste-makers of the school.
271
00:09:29,770 --> 00:09:30,669
You know it.
Big time.
272
00:09:30,671 --> 00:09:34,105
We'll eat anything.
I present to you Ball-Ball,
a high-octane sport
273
00:09:34,107 --> 00:09:36,775
of the future,
and it's the coolest,
274
00:09:36,777 --> 00:09:37,943
newest club in school.
275
00:09:37,945 --> 00:09:38,677
What the hell, man?
276
00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:40,178
You told me this was
a Rush Appreciation club.
277
00:09:40,180 --> 00:09:42,013
I'm letting you in
on the ground floor.
278
00:09:42,015 --> 00:09:44,983
'Cause what we have here,
it's more than a game.
279
00:09:44,985 --> 00:09:46,251
It's a way of life.
I've played it.
280
00:09:46,253 --> 00:09:48,053
They're definitely
overselling it, but it's fine.
281
00:09:48,055 --> 00:09:49,654
I heard I get to hit you
in the testicles.
282
00:09:49,656 --> 00:09:50,789
When do I get to do that?
283
00:09:50,791 --> 00:09:51,690
Love the enthusiasm!
284
00:09:51,692 --> 00:09:53,425
Now, I'm not only
president of this club.
285
00:09:53,427 --> 00:09:55,093
I'm also Ball-Ball
champion of the world.
286
00:09:55,095 --> 00:09:58,597
So I will naturally dominate,
so do not be discouraged.
287
00:09:58,599 --> 00:09:59,598
All right, everyone out!
288
00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:01,700
Ruben Amaro, Jr. has to
break in some new sneakers.
289
00:10:01,702 --> 00:10:04,169
But I signed out the gym
for my new Ball-Ball club.
290
00:10:04,171 --> 00:10:05,370
What is this?
How's it work?
291
00:10:05,372 --> 00:10:07,672
Ah, there's like
a thousand rules.
Too complicated for you.
292
00:10:07,674 --> 00:10:10,208
Bro, it's Ruben Amaro, Jr.
Let him in our club.
293
00:10:10,210 --> 00:10:12,077
Yeah, you want
this to go big, right?
294
00:10:12,079 --> 00:10:13,678
Well, he's the best athlete
in school.
295
00:10:13,680 --> 00:10:14,512
I don't know if it's confirmed
296
00:10:14,514 --> 00:10:15,780
he's the best
athlete in school.
297
00:10:15,782 --> 00:10:18,917
And honestly,
I'm not sure he's ready
to play game like this.
298
00:10:18,919 --> 00:10:20,151
Watch and learn.
299
00:10:20,153 --> 00:10:21,553
Ball-Ball!
300
00:10:21,555 --> 00:10:23,688
Oh, no! He caught it
with one hand.
301
00:10:23,690 --> 00:10:24,856
That's a ball-buster
bonus.
302
00:10:24,858 --> 00:10:28,360
A penalty shot
at Barry's face or nards.
Your choice.
303
00:10:28,362 --> 00:10:29,160
Nards!
Definitely the nards!
304
00:10:29,162 --> 00:10:32,130
Hey, Adam, pal,
maybe ease up
on the rules until...
305
00:10:32,432 --> 00:10:33,298
Ohh!
306
00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:34,799
Sweetie, are you okay?
307
00:10:34,801 --> 00:10:35,767
(GROANING) He
didn't say "Ball-Ball."
308
00:10:35,769 --> 00:10:38,236
This game is amazing!
I'm telling
everyone in school!
309
00:10:38,238 --> 00:10:39,404
Hey, Coach,
I like this club.
310
00:10:39,406 --> 00:10:43,742
Ruben Amaro, Jr. is in.
It is officially a club.
311
00:10:43,744 --> 00:10:44,876
(GASPS) Score!
We did it!
312
00:10:44,878 --> 00:10:46,411
Wait, is this little kid
playing with us?
313
00:10:46,413 --> 00:10:48,213
'Cause maybe
I'll take a rain check.
314
00:10:48,215 --> 00:10:49,648
If Ruben hates it,
I hate it, too.
315
00:10:49,650 --> 00:10:50,682
Actually,
I'm Barry's coach.
316
00:10:50,684 --> 00:10:53,284
No! I don't even know
who this kid is!
317
00:10:53,286 --> 00:10:55,387
Get out of here,
strange child.
318
00:10:55,389 --> 00:10:57,222
But this is our sport.
We invented it together.
319
00:10:57,224 --> 00:10:59,557
Well, sometimes in life,
you make hard choices.
320
00:10:59,559 --> 00:11:01,459
This is an easy one.
Bye, Adam.
321
00:11:01,461 --> 00:11:03,728
No! It's my game, too!
Turns out Barry added
a new rule
322
00:11:03,730 --> 00:11:08,400
to our beloved Ball-Ball...
stabbing me in the back.
323
00:11:09,536 --> 00:11:11,369
Despite my dad's
struggle at the store,
324
00:11:11,371 --> 00:11:14,339
he forbid my mom
from getting involved.
325
00:11:14,341 --> 00:11:16,107
It did not stick.
326
00:11:16,243 --> 00:11:17,509
Surprise!
327
00:11:17,511 --> 00:11:18,143
It's a fa-ton.
328
00:11:18,145 --> 00:11:21,346
I know it's a fa-ton.
We discussed the fa-ton.
329
00:11:21,348 --> 00:11:23,548
Get the fa-ton
out of my store!
330
00:11:23,550 --> 00:11:26,851
I believe it's pronounced
"fu-ton."
331
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:29,587
(BELL DINGS)
I'll handle this.
332
00:11:29,589 --> 00:11:30,622
Hello, sir.
333
00:11:30,624 --> 00:11:33,191
What fine piece
of luxury furniture
334
00:11:33,193 --> 00:11:34,125
can I put you in today?
335
00:11:34,127 --> 00:11:36,594
Oh. Is that one of those
new futons?
336
00:11:36,596 --> 00:11:39,631
Why, yes.
They're very comfortable.
337
00:11:39,633 --> 00:11:40,832
No. Ignore that thing.
338
00:11:40,834 --> 00:11:42,500
These people
don't even work here.
339
00:11:42,502 --> 00:11:43,568
See, I have
a small condo,
340
00:11:43,570 --> 00:11:45,637
and this would really save
a lot of room.
341
00:11:45,639 --> 00:11:48,173
Not to mention
a lot of money.
342
00:11:48,175 --> 00:11:50,208
Here. Sit down.
Or lie down.
343
00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:51,176
The choice is yours.
344
00:11:51,178 --> 00:11:52,744
Wait,
what if I told you
345
00:11:52,746 --> 00:11:57,082
I have a bed combined
with a small lake?
346
00:11:57,551 --> 00:12:00,452
You see that?
You see how it's gently
rocking me to sleep?
347
00:12:00,454 --> 00:12:02,921
Waterbed. (SIGHS)
Yeah, I don't know.
348
00:12:02,923 --> 00:12:03,955
It seems kind of '70s.
349
00:12:03,957 --> 00:12:05,790
This bed
is so damn relaxing!
350
00:12:05,792 --> 00:12:07,759
Really? 'Cause you
look more agitated.
351
00:12:07,761 --> 00:12:09,961
It's like being
in the freaking Bahamas.
352
00:12:09,963 --> 00:12:11,863
Come on.
Lay down next to me.
353
00:12:11,865 --> 00:12:15,366
Lay your body next to mine
and feel what I feel.
354
00:12:15,368 --> 00:12:17,702
Yeah, I'm...
I'm gonna go futon.
355
00:12:17,704 --> 00:12:18,203
Wonderful.
356
00:12:18,205 --> 00:12:21,239
Vic will ring you up since
he's not doing anything.
357
00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:22,741
(CHUCKLES)
358
00:12:22,743 --> 00:12:25,243
I'm taking
this commission.
359
00:12:25,245 --> 00:12:25,744
We did it.
360
00:12:25,746 --> 00:12:27,545
See what happens
when you accept a little help?
361
00:12:27,547 --> 00:12:29,948
You want to help? Great.
The store is yours.
362
00:12:29,950 --> 00:12:31,583
What are you
talking about?
363
00:12:31,585 --> 00:12:33,885
If I'm not needed here,
I quit.
364
00:12:33,887 --> 00:12:35,520
You can't quit!
You're the boss!
365
00:12:35,522 --> 00:12:38,089
Oh-ho-ho!
Well, now you're the boss.
366
00:12:38,091 --> 00:12:38,857
Well, if I'm the boss,
367
00:12:38,859 --> 00:12:42,894
then I hire you back
as my boss and I quit.
368
00:12:42,896 --> 00:12:44,095
Fine. I'm the boss?
369
00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:46,531
Well, then I'm leaving you
in charge forever!
370
00:12:46,533 --> 00:12:48,800
That day,
my dad wasn't the only one
371
00:12:48,802 --> 00:12:50,702
being beaten at his own game.
Ball-Ball.
372
00:12:50,704 --> 00:12:53,071
Ball-Ball.
Ball-Ball.
373
00:12:53,073 --> 00:12:54,472
Ball-Ball.
Oh!
374
00:12:54,474 --> 00:12:55,707
Damn it!
Rematch!
375
00:12:55,709 --> 00:12:58,076
Maybe I should play
Johnny Atkins or Carla.
376
00:12:58,078 --> 00:12:59,911
You know, make it fair.
Fair?
377
00:12:59,913 --> 00:13:00,512
What are you saying?
378
00:13:00,514 --> 00:13:03,081
He's saying
you suck, Goldberg.
Hit the bricks.
379
00:13:03,083 --> 00:13:04,516
Crazy girl's right,
Goldberg.
380
00:13:04,518 --> 00:13:06,451
People are playing.
Get off the court.
381
00:13:06,453 --> 00:13:07,452
But I'm Club President.
382
00:13:07,454 --> 00:13:08,887
I thought Ruben was.
383
00:13:08,889 --> 00:13:09,387
Good idea.
384
00:13:09,389 --> 00:13:11,790
Ruben Amaro, Jr.,
you're Club President.
385
00:13:11,792 --> 00:13:12,957
But I invented this game!
386
00:13:12,959 --> 00:13:15,927
Dude, you invented
Ruben-Ball?
387
00:13:17,731 --> 00:13:20,031
Well done, Barry.
Well done.
388
00:13:20,033 --> 00:13:21,232
Appreciate the support, bro,
389
00:13:21,234 --> 00:13:22,567
but it's not time
to celebrate.
390
00:13:22,569 --> 00:13:25,703
I'm not supporting you.
This is a sarcastic clap.
391
00:13:25,705 --> 00:13:29,274
What? A sarcastic clap
goes like this.
392
00:13:30,243 --> 00:13:32,710
Which is exactly
what I'm doing, dude.
393
00:13:32,712 --> 00:13:35,046
No, you're doing this.
394
00:13:35,048 --> 00:13:37,482
That's a slow clap
for a champion.
395
00:13:37,484 --> 00:13:40,185
No, that's not a slow clap.
This is.
396
00:13:40,187 --> 00:13:41,686
Oh, my God.
Can't you hear
the difference?
397
00:13:41,688 --> 00:13:44,055
You're not watching
what I'm doing.
Watch what I'm doing.
398
00:13:44,057 --> 00:13:46,257
You're not hearing it!
Hear the patterns.
It's a rhythm.
399
00:13:46,259 --> 00:13:47,625
You've had no rhythm
our whole life.
400
00:13:47,627 --> 00:13:48,693
You're not watching
what I'm doing!
401
00:13:48,695 --> 00:13:50,395
Just look! Just like this!
Aah! Forget the clap!
402
00:13:50,397 --> 00:13:54,065
All I know is, first,
you kick me out
of the game we created.
403
00:13:54,067 --> 00:13:56,968
Then you sucked at it
and lost it forever.
404
00:13:56,970 --> 00:13:58,536
Sucked?
Sucked!
405
00:13:58,538 --> 00:13:59,204
For years, I thought
406
00:13:59,206 --> 00:14:00,972
you were the greatest athlete
on the planet.
407
00:14:00,974 --> 00:14:04,175
Turns out,
you're, like, not good.
408
00:14:04,177 --> 00:14:05,310
Just like me.
409
00:14:05,312 --> 00:14:05,910
You take that back.
410
00:14:05,912 --> 00:14:08,046
Never!
You and me are the same.
411
00:14:08,048 --> 00:14:10,114
That is the single-most
hurtful thing
412
00:14:10,116 --> 00:14:12,183
anyone has ever said to me.
413
00:14:12,185 --> 00:14:13,818
The same.
414
00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:20,158
Don't support me now
with your applause.
415
00:14:20,160 --> 00:14:22,327
It's too late.
416
00:14:26,466 --> 00:14:28,099
Since I left you
in charge of the store,
417
00:14:28,101 --> 00:14:30,501
I thought you might
want to see what's happening.
418
00:14:30,503 --> 00:14:32,503
"Going Out of Business"
sale?
419
00:14:32,505 --> 00:14:33,872
Murray,
that's brilliant!
420
00:14:33,874 --> 00:14:36,641
No, no, since you insist
on running the store,
421
00:14:36,643 --> 00:14:37,308
I'm calling it quits
422
00:14:37,310 --> 00:14:39,210
and really going
out of business.
423
00:14:39,212 --> 00:14:41,679
Hon, furniture stores
do this all the time.
424
00:14:41,681 --> 00:14:43,915
Everybody knows
it's not real.
425
00:14:43,917 --> 00:14:44,582
But it is real!
426
00:14:44,584 --> 00:14:48,620
It's also the same exact ad
you ran three times last year.
427
00:14:51,391 --> 00:14:53,157
What do you think
of that?
428
00:14:53,159 --> 00:14:54,592
It's fantastic!
429
00:14:54,594 --> 00:14:55,260
No, no, no, read it.
430
00:14:55,262 --> 00:14:58,696
It's says "Seriously"
and "For real this time!"
431
00:14:58,698 --> 00:15:00,398
(CLICKS TONGUE)
Gotcha.
432
00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:02,133
Aah!
433
00:15:03,770 --> 00:15:04,636
Ha.
434
00:15:04,638 --> 00:15:06,871
Right here
in black and white.
435
00:15:06,873 --> 00:15:07,605
"It's all over!
436
00:15:07,607 --> 00:15:10,675
"This is not just one of those
things furniture stores do
437
00:15:10,677 --> 00:15:12,543
"to sell more furniture!
438
00:15:12,545 --> 00:15:15,246
"It's...totally...real!"
439
00:15:15,248 --> 00:15:15,980
Ha!
440
00:15:15,982 --> 00:15:17,882
You, sir, are a genius!
441
00:15:17,884 --> 00:15:18,683
If I'm so good,
442
00:15:18,685 --> 00:15:20,652
why did you come down
to the furniture store
443
00:15:20,654 --> 00:15:22,587
and mix in?
I was helping.
444
00:15:22,589 --> 00:15:23,755
See, that's
the thing, Bev.
445
00:15:23,757 --> 00:15:25,323
I didn't ask
for your help.
446
00:15:25,325 --> 00:15:27,091
Wait, where
are you going?
447
00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:29,894
Anywhere but here.
448
00:15:30,163 --> 00:15:33,398
Oh, look. Dad's having another
"Going Out of Business" sale.
449
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:34,165
Aah!
450
00:15:34,167 --> 00:15:36,968
So, instead of closing down
the store,
451
00:15:36,970 --> 00:15:39,270
my dad decided to move in.
452
00:15:39,272 --> 00:15:42,674
Stupid, giant water balloon!
453
00:15:42,676 --> 00:15:44,309
(GROANS)
454
00:15:46,680 --> 00:15:50,748
And he found comfort
in the last place he expected.
455
00:15:50,750 --> 00:15:51,950
Huh.
456
00:15:51,952 --> 00:15:54,852
That's damn nice.
457
00:15:54,988 --> 00:15:57,655
The next morning,
we found Barry's sports gear
458
00:15:57,657 --> 00:16:01,826
in the last place
we expected.
459
00:16:01,962 --> 00:16:04,529
Barry, what the...
What are you doing?
460
00:16:04,531 --> 00:16:05,463
Making a bonfire.
461
00:16:05,465 --> 00:16:06,898
I've officially quit
all of sports,
462
00:16:06,900 --> 00:16:08,099
and I'm burning
everything I own.
463
00:16:08,101 --> 00:16:11,602
Canoeing isn't even a sport.
It's a leisure activity.
464
00:16:11,604 --> 00:16:12,904
Not the way I did it.
465
00:16:12,906 --> 00:16:15,139
Goodbye,
extreme canoeing.
466
00:16:16,009 --> 00:16:18,643
And farewell to you,
boomerang.
467
00:16:21,448 --> 00:16:25,116
I mean it!
I don't want you here!
Go on! Get out of here!
468
00:16:28,421 --> 00:16:30,355
Damn you!
469
00:16:31,858 --> 00:16:32,957
Let me live my life!
470
00:16:32,959 --> 00:16:34,759
Dude, what did you
do to him?
471
00:16:34,761 --> 00:16:35,426
Told him the truth!
472
00:16:35,428 --> 00:16:37,695
He's not some champion.
He's a scrub like me.
473
00:16:37,697 --> 00:16:41,065
Dear Lord, man.
Do you realize
what you've done?
474
00:16:41,067 --> 00:16:42,633
Sports are
everything to Barry,
475
00:16:42,635 --> 00:16:43,634
and you just took them away.
476
00:16:43,636 --> 00:16:46,471
Why do I matter so much?
I'm just his brother.
477
00:16:46,473 --> 00:16:47,338
Deep down, Barry knows
478
00:16:47,340 --> 00:16:49,540
that out in the world,
he's not some champion.
479
00:16:49,542 --> 00:16:51,909
But in this house,
you make him feel like one.
480
00:16:51,911 --> 00:16:53,878
I...I do?
Yes.
481
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:55,580
You idolize him.
482
00:16:55,582 --> 00:16:57,115
That's what
little brothers do.
483
00:16:57,117 --> 00:16:58,616
I didn't realize that.
484
00:16:58,618 --> 00:17:01,019
Good news is that even though
you destroyed him,
485
00:17:01,021 --> 00:17:03,388
you can still
build him back up.
486
00:17:03,690 --> 00:17:07,058
Goodbye,
tennis racquet/air guitar.
487
00:17:09,396 --> 00:17:10,795
Well,
that was my racquet.
488
00:17:10,797 --> 00:17:13,898
But sure,
I'll build him back up.
489
00:17:15,368 --> 00:17:16,467
After crushing
Barry's spirits,
490
00:17:16,469 --> 00:17:19,937
I decided I couldn't let him
throw away his dreams,
491
00:17:19,939 --> 00:17:20,905
or all his sports stuff.
492
00:17:20,907 --> 00:17:23,074
What are you doing?
I threw this junk out.
493
00:17:23,076 --> 00:17:26,177
I brought it back in 'cause
we're not done with it yet.
494
00:17:26,179 --> 00:17:27,512
Come here.
Check out the board.
495
00:17:27,514 --> 00:17:31,049
Forget Olympic glory.
I'm not a champion.
496
00:17:31,051 --> 00:17:33,651
I'm not even Eddie the Eagle.
I'm nothing.
497
00:17:33,653 --> 00:17:35,253
(VANGELIS'
CHARIOTS OF FIRE PLAYS)
498
00:17:35,255 --> 00:17:36,254
Maybe out there.
499
00:17:36,256 --> 00:17:38,456
But in here,
you're Barry the Eagle.
500
00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:41,359
Yeah, maybe you won't be
in the Winter or Summer Games,
501
00:17:41,361 --> 00:17:44,529
but we got
something way better.
502
00:17:44,531 --> 00:17:45,963
I give you...
503
00:17:47,634 --> 00:17:48,833
The Home Games.
504
00:17:48,835 --> 00:17:51,235
The Home Games?
That's not a thing.
505
00:17:51,237 --> 00:17:51,936
Neither was Ball-Ball.
506
00:17:51,938 --> 00:17:55,406
Well, thanks to me,
we lost it to
Ruben Amaro, Jr.
507
00:17:55,408 --> 00:17:57,175
Let him have it,
'cause we now got
508
00:17:57,177 --> 00:17:58,810
seventeen
homemade games
509
00:17:58,812 --> 00:18:01,212
combining
athletic skill, bravery,
510
00:18:01,214 --> 00:18:03,314
stupidity, and karate.
511
00:18:03,316 --> 00:18:04,148
What about boomerang?
512
00:18:04,150 --> 00:18:07,018
Oh, we be 'rangin' bro.
We be 'rangin'.
513
00:18:07,020 --> 00:18:09,020
But only one champion
in this house
514
00:18:09,022 --> 00:18:10,721
can take the gold.
515
00:18:10,723 --> 00:18:14,759
Light the torch.
Let the games begin.
516
00:18:18,498 --> 00:18:22,633
That fateful day,
we hung up our Ball-Ball gear.
517
00:18:23,103 --> 00:18:25,136
Sure, we lost
one absurd brotherly game,
518
00:18:25,138 --> 00:18:30,908
but we gained a tradition
that would last a lifetime.
519
00:18:34,047 --> 00:18:35,746
My brother never made it
to the Olympics
520
00:18:35,748 --> 00:18:38,483
like Eddie the Eagle,
but that day,
521
00:18:38,485 --> 00:18:41,252
he sure felt like him.
522
00:18:42,689 --> 00:18:44,956
(MUMBLES)
523
00:18:45,125 --> 00:18:47,725
What's up?
Morning, sunshine!
524
00:18:47,727 --> 00:18:49,327
It's 11:15.
525
00:18:49,329 --> 00:18:51,095
We just sold six futons,
526
00:18:51,097 --> 00:18:53,131
thanks to you
sleeping so peacefully.
527
00:18:53,133 --> 00:18:56,567
(GROANS) Is that supposed to
make me feel better?
528
00:18:56,569 --> 00:19:01,172
Look, Mur, when I first
opened this place,
529
00:19:01,174 --> 00:19:02,473
business was lousy.
530
00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:05,910
It was so bad,
my in-laws
would buy furniture
531
00:19:05,912 --> 00:19:06,611
they didn't even need.
532
00:19:06,613 --> 00:19:09,647
Every room in their house
had three beds.
533
00:19:09,649 --> 00:19:12,183
Why would they do something
so stupid?
534
00:19:12,185 --> 00:19:13,050
To help me.
535
00:19:13,052 --> 00:19:16,654
That's what family does.
We take care of each other.
536
00:19:16,656 --> 00:19:19,490
There's no shame
in that.
537
00:19:19,626 --> 00:19:21,926
Yeah, well,
it feels like there is.
538
00:19:21,928 --> 00:19:24,862
I know that's how it was
in your family,
539
00:19:24,864 --> 00:19:27,665
but now you're my family.
540
00:19:27,667 --> 00:19:30,735
And this
is how we do it.
541
00:19:39,312 --> 00:19:41,612
Did you...fold stuff?
542
00:19:41,614 --> 00:19:44,315
Figured
you gave me a hand,
543
00:19:44,317 --> 00:19:45,683
thought I could
return the favor.
544
00:19:45,685 --> 00:19:49,187
Look, Murray,
I know selling furniture
545
00:19:49,189 --> 00:19:50,755
is your thing,
and I'm sorry that I...
546
00:19:50,757 --> 00:19:53,691
Oh, no, no, no.
This is on me.
547
00:19:53,693 --> 00:19:56,661
The store...
it's struggling, Bevy.
548
00:19:56,663 --> 00:20:02,433
And truthfully,
I could really use your help.
549
00:20:04,470 --> 00:20:06,737
I never thought you'd ask.
550
00:20:06,739 --> 00:20:07,471
But he did.
551
00:20:07,473 --> 00:20:11,943
For the first time, my dad
broke down and asked for help.
552
00:20:11,945 --> 00:20:15,646
Thanks to my mom,
it really did pay off.
553
00:20:15,648 --> 00:20:17,215
That's the thing
about family,
554
00:20:17,217 --> 00:20:20,551
they're always there
to pick you up when you fall.
555
00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:21,919
And if you're lucky,
556
00:20:21,921 --> 00:20:26,157
they help you soar
like an eagle named Eddie.
557
00:20:26,159 --> 00:20:27,158
We did it, baby!
558
00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:29,327
Hell, yeah, we did.
559
00:20:31,664 --> 00:20:32,930
(MUSIC PLAYING)
560
00:20:32,932 --> 00:20:36,734
I'm one of the announcers here
at our Home Games Competition.
561
00:20:36,736 --> 00:20:40,171
(BOTH SCREAMING)
562
00:20:40,373 --> 00:20:43,407
(SCREAMING)
563
00:20:45,144 --> 00:20:48,846
(GRUNTING)
564
00:20:49,182 --> 00:20:52,283
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)
565
00:20:53,519 --> 00:20:56,387
Okay, we can all agree
this year's Home Games
566
00:20:56,389 --> 00:20:58,689
was a raging success,
but looking ahead,
567
00:20:58,691 --> 00:21:00,558
I want to legitimize
the competition.
568
00:21:00,560 --> 00:21:03,628
Allow me to introduce
next year's new event,
569
00:21:03,630 --> 00:21:04,729
Can You Feel That?
570
00:21:04,731 --> 00:21:06,097
Like the name.
How's it work?
571
00:21:06,099 --> 00:21:08,065
Yeah, Barry,
how does this work?
572
00:21:08,067 --> 00:21:09,767
Best we learn
by demonstration.
573
00:21:09,769 --> 00:21:11,936
Gentlemen,
raise your bats.
574
00:21:11,938 --> 00:21:12,903
W...wait, what?
575
00:21:12,905 --> 00:21:16,374
On your mark.
Get set. Go.
576
00:21:16,376 --> 00:21:19,143
Wait! Shouldn't I also
have a helmet?
577
00:21:19,145 --> 00:21:19,777
Can you feel that?
578
00:21:19,779 --> 00:21:21,445
Right there, right there.
You feel that?
579
00:21:21,447 --> 00:21:23,447
Nothing? Anything?
580
00:21:23,449 --> 00:21:24,448
Actually, no.
581
00:21:24,450 --> 00:21:26,117
I support
whatever this is.
582
00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:29,420
Hey, Erica! Check me out!
I'm tough and sexy!
583
00:21:29,422 --> 00:21:30,721
(THUD)