1 00:00:02,435 --> 00:00:03,235 [patriotic music] 2 00:00:03,237 --> 00:00:05,137 - Teddy Roosevelt saved football. 3 00:00:05,139 --> 00:00:08,040 Nobody knows that because we're young and dumb 4 00:00:08,042 --> 00:00:09,775 and nobody reads a goddamn book anymore. 5 00:00:09,777 --> 00:00:12,578 - They knew that everything was riding on the speech 6 00:00:12,580 --> 00:00:14,146 Churchill had to Congress. 7 00:00:14,148 --> 00:00:14,680 [laughs] 8 00:00:14,682 --> 00:00:16,181 I have no idea what I was talking about. 9 00:00:16,183 --> 00:00:16,815 - [laughs] 10 00:00:16,817 --> 00:00:19,485 - Eleanor Roosevelt is Burgess Meredith from "Rocky." 11 00:00:19,487 --> 00:00:22,688 Na zdorovie. Oh, I spit. 12 00:00:22,690 --> 00:00:25,891 [patriotic music] 13 00:00:25,893 --> 00:00:31,430 ♪ ♪ 14 00:00:35,235 --> 00:00:38,337 - Katie Nolan, give a favorite football movie. 15 00:00:38,339 --> 00:00:40,272 - "Friday Night Lights" was a good one. 16 00:00:40,274 --> 00:00:44,243 - Sorry, let me dry my hands off before I high five you. 17 00:00:44,245 --> 00:00:45,711 The best. 18 00:00:45,713 --> 00:00:47,046 - "Varsity Blues," also good. 19 00:00:47,048 --> 00:00:48,981 - [in Southern accent] I don't want your life. 20 00:00:48,983 --> 00:00:49,848 - No, it's slower. 21 00:00:49,850 --> 00:00:52,217 both: [slowly, with a Southern accent] I don't want 22 00:00:52,219 --> 00:00:53,485 your life. 23 00:00:53,487 --> 00:00:54,019 - Yeah. 24 00:00:54,021 --> 00:00:55,921 James Van Der Beek. It's my [bleep]-- 25 00:00:55,923 --> 00:00:56,755 it's my dude. 26 00:00:56,757 --> 00:00:58,190 - Yeah, he's my Brando. 27 00:00:58,192 --> 00:01:00,426 - [laughs] - [chuckles] 28 00:01:00,428 --> 00:01:02,261 - Hello, I'm Katie Nolan, 29 00:01:02,263 --> 00:01:05,431 and today I'm gonna tell you about how Teddy Roosevelt 30 00:01:05,433 --> 00:01:08,333 saved the sport of football. 31 00:01:08,335 --> 00:01:10,169 I put the word "sport" in in case people didn't know. 32 00:01:10,171 --> 00:01:12,938 - They still might think it's soccer, but we'll clear that up. 33 00:01:12,940 --> 00:01:15,407 - [bleep] them if that's what they think. 34 00:01:15,409 --> 00:01:16,175 [laughs] 35 00:01:16,177 --> 00:01:20,646 Our story begins late 1890s when football was just 36 00:01:20,648 --> 00:01:24,249 a college game, and there was no forward passing, 37 00:01:24,251 --> 00:01:27,086 just dudes who would smash their bodies 38 00:01:27,088 --> 00:01:30,255 into each other's bodies, and then so in 19-- 39 00:01:30,257 --> 00:01:34,927 nope, 1894, there was this annual game between Harvard 40 00:01:34,929 --> 00:01:39,498 and Yale that was so violent it was called: 41 00:01:41,835 --> 00:01:45,404 Because it was just massacre. 42 00:01:45,406 --> 00:01:48,941 Seven people were carted off the field 43 00:01:48,943 --> 00:01:51,376 with dying injuries. 44 00:01:51,378 --> 00:01:56,181 Yale won the game, and so they were so excited in their win, 45 00:01:56,183 --> 00:01:59,017 they just started punching people. 46 00:01:59,019 --> 00:02:01,019 They were like, oh, my God. 47 00:02:01,021 --> 00:02:01,954 We won that game. 48 00:02:01,956 --> 00:02:06,492 Like, it was really hard to watch, but we crushed them, 49 00:02:06,494 --> 00:02:10,362 literally and also subject--object--what? 50 00:02:10,364 --> 00:02:12,431 What's the opposite of literally? 51 00:02:12,433 --> 00:02:13,899 - Figuratively. - Thank you. 52 00:02:13,901 --> 00:02:17,503 Literally and figuratively we crushed those guys. 53 00:02:17,505 --> 00:02:20,873 The Harvard fans were like, I want to go home and cry 54 00:02:20,875 --> 00:02:23,575 and also invent Facebook. 55 00:02:23,577 --> 00:02:26,979 [both chuckling] 56 00:02:28,348 --> 00:02:32,818 And that game was sort of the catalyst for people realizing 57 00:02:32,820 --> 00:02:34,686 hey, maybe, um... 58 00:02:34,688 --> 00:02:38,524 football is, like, not good 59 00:02:38,526 --> 00:02:43,795 because people are dying in a large sum 60 00:02:43,797 --> 00:02:44,496 every year. 61 00:02:44,498 --> 00:02:50,769 So enter Teddy Roosevelt, who was a huge football fan. 62 00:02:50,771 --> 00:02:54,039 Like, he loved anything brutally manly. 63 00:02:54,041 --> 00:02:58,243 So football to Teddy was, like, what America was about. 64 00:02:58,245 --> 00:03:01,847 And so when they banned that game between Harvard and Yale, 65 00:03:01,849 --> 00:03:02,681 he was like, excuse me. 66 00:03:02,683 --> 00:03:03,949 No. Bring that game back. 67 00:03:03,951 --> 00:03:06,618 We love that game. It means a lot to us as people. 68 00:03:06,620 --> 00:03:07,553 It's been two years. 69 00:03:07,555 --> 00:03:08,987 I can't live without it anymore. 70 00:03:08,989 --> 00:03:12,191 Which is how I felt about sex in college. 71 00:03:12,825 --> 00:03:13,559 - [laughs] 72 00:03:13,561 --> 00:03:19,665 - So, like, Teddy Roosevelt's son, Theodore Roosevelt Jr. 73 00:03:19,667 --> 00:03:22,334 joins the Harvard freshman football team. 74 00:03:22,336 --> 00:03:26,738 So his first game, the other team targeted him 75 00:03:26,740 --> 00:03:29,341 because he's the president's son, and-- 76 00:03:29,343 --> 00:03:31,677 [mimics bone breaking] Nose broken. 77 00:03:31,679 --> 00:03:32,477 Like, right away. 78 00:03:32,479 --> 00:03:34,947 And then they put a huge gash on his face. 79 00:03:34,949 --> 00:03:38,283 So Teddy Roosevelt decided that football's fantastic, 80 00:03:38,285 --> 00:03:41,320 but it's maybe a little bit too violent. 81 00:03:41,322 --> 00:03:43,889 Like, maybe we could calm it down. 82 00:03:43,891 --> 00:03:46,725 And, you know, in his spare time he was president, 83 00:03:46,727 --> 00:03:49,728 so he ended the Russo-Japanese War 84 00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:52,331 and then was like, I'm also gonna fix-- 85 00:03:52,333 --> 00:03:54,032 I'm gonna save football. 86 00:03:54,034 --> 00:03:56,235 So anyway... 87 00:03:56,237 --> 00:03:58,103 what was I talking about? 88 00:03:58,105 --> 00:03:58,971 - Teddy Roosevelt. 89 00:03:58,973 --> 00:04:00,872 - So Teddy Roosevelt called this meeting 90 00:04:00,874 --> 00:04:04,209 with the heads of the college football powerhouses, 91 00:04:04,211 --> 00:04:07,879 and he was like, look, guys, football. 92 00:04:07,881 --> 00:04:09,848 Pretty violent, right? 93 00:04:09,850 --> 00:04:11,116 Like, love the sport. 94 00:04:11,118 --> 00:04:12,184 Doing a great job. 95 00:04:12,186 --> 00:04:13,819 Let's not kill so many people. 96 00:04:13,821 --> 00:04:17,289 And so the head coach of Yale, Walter Camp, 97 00:04:17,291 --> 00:04:21,226 who's known as the father of American football was like, 98 00:04:21,228 --> 00:04:24,329 um, don't talk about my sport that way. 99 00:04:24,331 --> 00:04:27,799 I made this sport and we're not gonna change it. 100 00:04:27,801 --> 00:04:29,868 Like, football is football. 101 00:04:29,870 --> 00:04:30,736 Suck it, bro. 102 00:04:30,738 --> 00:04:33,605 And so the president was like, well, 103 00:04:33,607 --> 00:04:35,440 this guy just told me to suck it, bro. 104 00:04:35,442 --> 00:04:37,376 And so I think the meeting is ov-- 105 00:04:37,378 --> 00:04:38,477 meeting is adjourned. 106 00:04:38,479 --> 00:04:40,345 I think the meeting is adjourned. 107 00:04:40,347 --> 00:04:42,481 And so they didn't come to any sort of agreement, 108 00:04:42,483 --> 00:04:46,184 and at the end of that season, the newsboys were like, 109 00:04:46,186 --> 00:04:47,219 extra, extra! 110 00:04:47,221 --> 00:04:48,553 Read all about it! 111 00:04:48,555 --> 00:04:50,756 18 s-deaths-- 112 00:04:50,758 --> 00:04:52,991 I was gonna say serious deaths. 113 00:04:52,993 --> 00:04:53,659 [laughs] 114 00:04:53,661 --> 00:04:56,528 There are deaths that are, like, eh. 115 00:04:56,530 --> 00:04:58,030 It's kind of funny. 116 00:04:58,032 --> 00:04:58,897 [laughs] 117 00:04:58,899 --> 00:05:00,599 18 deaths 118 00:05:00,601 --> 00:05:03,769 and 159 fatalities. 119 00:05:03,771 --> 00:05:04,836 Shit. 120 00:05:04,838 --> 00:05:06,972 Fatalities means death. 121 00:05:06,974 --> 00:05:11,543 18 deaths and 159 super serious injuries 122 00:05:11,545 --> 00:05:14,446 from football happening now. 123 00:05:14,448 --> 00:05:17,449 Exclamation point, end quote. 124 00:05:17,451 --> 00:05:18,550 Read about it. 125 00:05:18,552 --> 00:05:20,519 Or don't. 126 00:05:20,521 --> 00:05:22,954 So Teddy invited everybody back, 127 00:05:22,956 --> 00:05:24,623 and he's like, hey, y'all. 128 00:05:24,625 --> 00:05:25,991 All this stuff just happened. 129 00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:28,593 Walter Camp, I see you raising your hand. 130 00:05:28,595 --> 00:05:29,995 I don't acknowledge you. 131 00:05:29,997 --> 00:05:31,630 We have to change your sport. 132 00:05:31,632 --> 00:05:33,165 I get that it's your baby, 133 00:05:33,167 --> 00:05:35,033 but sometimes your baby sucks. 134 00:05:35,035 --> 00:05:37,102 If you give birth to a baby and you're like, 135 00:05:37,104 --> 00:05:38,537 do whatever the [bleep] you want, 136 00:05:38,539 --> 00:05:40,839 it's gonna punch people and people are gonna die. 137 00:05:40,841 --> 00:05:44,076 Your baby needs to be raised properly in a decent home, 138 00:05:44,078 --> 00:05:47,646 and the decent home is let's make some new rules. 139 00:05:47,648 --> 00:05:49,815 So, like, what if-- crazy thought-- 140 00:05:49,817 --> 00:05:53,318 what if we make first down instead of five yards, 141 00:05:53,320 --> 00:05:54,086 make it ten? 142 00:05:54,088 --> 00:05:56,588 And then he was like, what if you took a ball 143 00:05:56,590 --> 00:05:59,224 and you threw it instead of only just being able 144 00:05:59,226 --> 00:06:02,728 to shove into each other to move down the field? 145 00:06:02,730 --> 00:06:04,029 Wouldn't that be wild? 146 00:06:04,031 --> 00:06:05,964 And people were like, wait. 147 00:06:05,966 --> 00:06:08,133 You want to throw a ball? 148 00:06:08,135 --> 00:06:12,371 Like, yeah, that's why balls were invented, to be thrown. 149 00:06:12,373 --> 00:06:15,140 Walter Camp was like, okay. 150 00:06:15,142 --> 00:06:15,741 Fine. 151 00:06:15,743 --> 00:06:20,679 And so basically after that meeting, there was, like, 152 00:06:20,681 --> 00:06:26,585 a national standard for what football was, 153 00:06:26,587 --> 00:06:28,153 and it was great. 154 00:06:28,155 --> 00:06:30,021 [uplifting music] 155 00:06:30,023 --> 00:06:34,993 And it was all great because of Teddy Roosevelt, 156 00:06:34,995 --> 00:06:36,561 and, like, nobody knows that. 157 00:06:36,563 --> 00:06:38,697 They just think Teddy Roosevelt, oh, president. 158 00:06:38,699 --> 00:06:41,166 Or actually, nowadays they go, Teddy Roosevelt? 159 00:06:41,168 --> 00:06:42,134 Oh, you mean Franklin? 160 00:06:42,136 --> 00:06:43,268 Because we're young and dumb 161 00:06:43,270 --> 00:06:46,338 and nobody reads a goddamn book anymore. 162 00:06:46,340 --> 00:06:48,607 ♪ ♪ 163 00:06:48,609 --> 00:06:49,641 - Cheers. 164 00:06:49,643 --> 00:06:52,811 ♪ ♪ 165 00:06:54,480 --> 00:06:55,580 - Okay, so I'm gonna make drinks 166 00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:56,515 based on Winston Churchill. 167 00:06:56,517 --> 00:06:59,785 We have amazing quotes about his daily drinking habits. 168 00:06:59,787 --> 00:07:03,355 So we're gonna start out with some scotch and soda. 169 00:07:03,357 --> 00:07:04,890 He wanted 90-year-old brandy. 170 00:07:04,892 --> 00:07:07,559 And this would be French champagne. 171 00:07:07,561 --> 00:07:09,995 - Oh, oui, please. 172 00:07:09,997 --> 00:07:11,696 Okay, so in the name of Churchill-- 173 00:07:11,698 --> 00:07:13,365 - How do you--have champagne. How do you think-- 174 00:07:13,367 --> 00:07:14,566 - I'm--double fist it. Double fist it. 175 00:07:14,568 --> 00:07:15,600 - Oh, my God. Are you kidding? 176 00:07:15,602 --> 00:07:16,768 - What? Isn't that what we were doing? 177 00:07:16,770 --> 00:07:18,236 - No, no, no. I love every bit of it. 178 00:07:18,238 --> 00:07:19,571 Okay, so we take a sip here. 179 00:07:19,573 --> 00:07:21,740 - Yeah, sip here. Mmm. 180 00:07:21,742 --> 00:07:24,709 - How do you think Churchill drank champagne? 181 00:07:24,711 --> 00:07:30,215 - Well, I know how you will, and it's just like that. 182 00:07:33,252 --> 00:07:35,420 - Man, I'm 38. 183 00:07:35,422 --> 00:07:36,054 - [laughs] 184 00:07:36,056 --> 00:07:37,789 - Hello, I'm Eric Edelstein, 185 00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:40,892 and today we're gonna be discussing Christmas 186 00:07:40,894 --> 00:07:45,630 with Churchill and FDR saving the world. 187 00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:49,835 Our story begins December 7, 1941, 188 00:07:49,837 --> 00:07:52,003 and as Roosevelt so incredibly said, 189 00:07:52,005 --> 00:07:54,906 "A day that will live in infamy." 190 00:07:54,908 --> 00:07:57,642 The attack on Pearl Harbor changed everything 191 00:07:57,644 --> 00:07:59,411 because for two years and three months, 192 00:07:59,413 --> 00:08:01,980 Winston Churchill's fighting this war on his own. 193 00:08:01,982 --> 00:08:05,283 Literally Winston Churchill against Hitler. 194 00:08:05,285 --> 00:08:06,718 And at that point, we're like, okay, 195 00:08:06,720 --> 00:08:08,453 let's just fight Japan, kick their ass 196 00:08:08,455 --> 00:08:11,423 'cause this is bullshit, but why the [bleep] should we 197 00:08:11,425 --> 00:08:12,357 go over to Europe? 198 00:08:12,359 --> 00:08:14,025 Another one of their dumb wars? 199 00:08:14,027 --> 00:08:16,294 Who's this Hitler guy? 200 00:08:16,296 --> 00:08:17,262 FDR believed Churchill, 201 00:08:17,264 --> 00:08:20,232 that this was the greatest threat to human existence 202 00:08:20,234 --> 00:08:21,900 in the history of man. 203 00:08:21,902 --> 00:08:24,469 So this Christmas trip was planned 204 00:08:24,471 --> 00:08:27,939 for Churchill to come over, see FDR, 205 00:08:27,941 --> 00:08:32,277 and FDR views Churchill as, like, his party buddy. 206 00:08:32,279 --> 00:08:34,646 And Churchill looks at Alonzo Fields, 207 00:08:34,648 --> 00:08:37,148 the White House butler, and says, 208 00:08:37,150 --> 00:08:38,416 "I have a few orders. 209 00:08:38,418 --> 00:08:39,851 "In the morning before breakfast, 210 00:08:39,853 --> 00:08:41,786 "I would like a tumbler of sherry. 211 00:08:41,788 --> 00:08:47,092 "I will need scotch and soda, two of them, before lunch, 212 00:08:47,094 --> 00:08:52,864 "and before I go to sleep, I must have 90-year-old brandy 213 00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:54,799 and French champagne." 214 00:08:54,801 --> 00:08:55,834 That was Churchill. 215 00:08:55,836 --> 00:08:56,835 He partied and loved it. 216 00:08:56,837 --> 00:09:00,572 So he and Roosevelt immediately dig in and start planning 217 00:09:00,574 --> 00:09:02,741 how they're gonna kick Hitler's ass. 218 00:09:02,743 --> 00:09:03,375 Thank God. 219 00:09:03,377 --> 00:09:06,711 And then Churchill brings in his mobile map room, 220 00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:10,048 which was this series of maps with thumbtacks of where 221 00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:12,117 their troops are and where they want to go 222 00:09:12,119 --> 00:09:13,084 and how they can defeat him. 223 00:09:13,086 --> 00:09:16,421 And so basically they're like two little kids 224 00:09:16,423 --> 00:09:17,222 playing Battleship. 225 00:09:17,224 --> 00:09:19,124 We're gonna move this battleship here 226 00:09:19,126 --> 00:09:21,693 and over here, and put all these thumbtacks. 227 00:09:21,695 --> 00:09:23,061 That's 40,000 troops here. 228 00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:25,397 They'll never see it coming, Franklin. 229 00:09:25,399 --> 00:09:26,064 Oh, okay. 230 00:09:26,066 --> 00:09:27,432 I got you, I got you. But hold on. 231 00:09:27,434 --> 00:09:29,935 What if we do a little bit through Versailles? 232 00:09:29,937 --> 00:09:30,869 Think about that. 233 00:09:30,871 --> 00:09:32,103 I know it's crazy. 234 00:09:32,105 --> 00:09:33,204 [laughs] 235 00:09:33,206 --> 00:09:35,540 Crazy like a fox, friend. 236 00:09:35,542 --> 00:09:37,609 Let's dance! 237 00:09:37,611 --> 00:09:38,777 So-- [giggles] 238 00:09:38,779 --> 00:09:42,314 So basically he'd been having these incredible sleepovers 239 00:09:42,316 --> 00:09:44,916 with Churchill where every night they would stay up 240 00:09:44,918 --> 00:09:48,853 until 2:00 or 3:00 a.m. planning this war, drinking, 241 00:09:48,855 --> 00:09:51,022 getting strange, and fighting Nazis. 242 00:09:51,024 --> 00:09:54,492 If this ain't the most "Drunk History" story ever, 243 00:09:54,494 --> 00:09:55,894 friends. 244 00:09:55,896 --> 00:09:56,461 Come on. 245 00:09:56,463 --> 00:09:59,931 Eleanor would pop her head in, like, FDR, Churchill, 246 00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:02,267 so excited you guys have figured out 247 00:10:02,269 --> 00:10:03,134 how to defeat Hitler. 248 00:10:03,136 --> 00:10:05,770 That's great, but, eh, maybe you should go to bed. 249 00:10:05,772 --> 00:10:07,772 Eleanor Roosevelt was probably right. 250 00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:12,510 A guy that survived Spanish flu and polio probably shouldn't be 251 00:10:12,512 --> 00:10:13,445 keeping Churchill hours. 252 00:10:13,447 --> 00:10:17,015 But they knew that everything was riding on the speech 253 00:10:17,017 --> 00:10:18,350 Churchill had to Congress. 254 00:10:18,352 --> 00:10:20,452 So Churchill goes to Congress. 255 00:10:20,454 --> 00:10:21,252 He started with jokes. 256 00:10:21,254 --> 00:10:22,754 I hope you're wearing cheap socks; 257 00:10:22,756 --> 00:10:24,489 they'll be knocked right off. 258 00:10:24,491 --> 00:10:27,525 He made everybody laugh, and then he said-- 259 00:10:27,527 --> 00:10:31,896 no hyperbole-- "This is the greatest threat 260 00:10:31,898 --> 00:10:33,698 "humanity has ever faced. 261 00:10:33,700 --> 00:10:37,369 "This is somebody that is executing gypsies 262 00:10:37,371 --> 00:10:40,372 "and Jewish people and taking the economic decline 263 00:10:40,374 --> 00:10:44,976 "of Germany and turned that sad thing 264 00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:46,845 into his agenda." 265 00:10:46,847 --> 00:10:48,146 And Congress is like, wow. 266 00:10:48,148 --> 00:10:50,815 This Hitler sounds like a real asshole. 267 00:10:50,817 --> 00:10:52,217 Churchill got done. 268 00:10:52,219 --> 00:10:54,119 There was a silence... 269 00:10:54,754 --> 00:10:57,088 And then a thunderous applause. 270 00:10:57,090 --> 00:10:58,690 People loved it. They loved him. 271 00:10:58,692 --> 00:11:01,593 He rallied him 'cause he's one of the great speakers 272 00:11:01,595 --> 00:11:03,628 in the history of mankind. 273 00:11:05,197 --> 00:11:06,698 - That's great. - [laughs] 274 00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:08,767 I have no idea what I was talking about. 275 00:11:08,769 --> 00:11:09,601 - [laughs] - Sorry. 276 00:11:09,603 --> 00:11:13,438 I tried to get--it's all-- it's like--yeah. 277 00:11:14,140 --> 00:11:14,706 Okay. 278 00:11:14,708 --> 00:11:16,675 So FDR's like, Churchill, 279 00:11:16,677 --> 00:11:17,842 you killed that speech. 280 00:11:17,844 --> 00:11:18,810 Now we get to have our destiny. 281 00:11:18,812 --> 00:11:21,179 We're gonna go kick Hitler's ass. 282 00:11:21,181 --> 00:11:25,750 So at the end of this trip, Churchill's so sad. 283 00:11:25,752 --> 00:11:26,551 [melancholy music] 284 00:11:26,553 --> 00:11:28,753 He knew he'd accomplished his mission, 285 00:11:28,755 --> 00:11:30,989 but he's got to go back home. 286 00:11:30,991 --> 00:11:35,260 He got back to England, and waiting there on his desk 287 00:11:35,262 --> 00:11:36,094 is a telegram. 288 00:11:36,096 --> 00:11:40,699 It says, "I'm so happy to be living 289 00:11:40,701 --> 00:11:42,600 "in the same decade as you. 290 00:11:42,602 --> 00:11:44,803 Signed, FDR." 291 00:11:44,805 --> 00:11:48,006 [triumphant music] 292 00:11:48,008 --> 00:11:50,175 ♪ ♪ 293 00:11:50,177 --> 00:11:51,409 They did it. 294 00:11:51,411 --> 00:11:53,645 - You're the best. - You are. 295 00:11:53,647 --> 00:11:55,480 - Cheers. - Cheers. 296 00:11:55,482 --> 00:11:57,315 To these guys, man. 297 00:11:57,317 --> 00:12:01,586 ♪ ♪ 298 00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:06,558 - Cheers. - Cheers to you. 299 00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:08,493 Ready to do one more? 300 00:12:08,495 --> 00:12:10,895 - I thought you learned from last year. 301 00:12:10,897 --> 00:12:11,563 - Hmm? 302 00:12:11,565 --> 00:12:12,964 - You drink after you cheers. 303 00:12:12,966 --> 00:12:15,100 - Wait, what did I do wrong? What did I do wrong? 304 00:12:15,102 --> 00:12:16,701 - You can't talk. 305 00:12:16,703 --> 00:12:17,569 Cheers. 306 00:12:17,571 --> 00:12:18,403 [glasses clink] 307 00:12:18,405 --> 00:12:21,639 [instrumental music] 308 00:12:21,641 --> 00:12:23,608 ♪ ♪ 309 00:12:23,610 --> 00:12:25,376 Let's go do the story. 310 00:12:25,378 --> 00:12:27,445 Hello, my name is Paget Brewster, 311 00:12:27,447 --> 00:12:31,082 and today we're gonna talk about Eleanor Roosevelt 312 00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:32,951 and the Communist sniper. 313 00:12:32,953 --> 00:12:35,086 - Cheers. - Na zdorovie. 314 00:12:35,088 --> 00:12:36,821 - Na zdorovie. - Oh, I spit. 315 00:12:36,823 --> 00:12:37,689 Okay. - [laughs] 316 00:12:37,691 --> 00:12:40,492 - Our story begins in 1941. 317 00:12:40,494 --> 00:12:42,193 It was the Second World War 318 00:12:42,195 --> 00:12:45,330 and the U.S. was fighting Japan. 319 00:12:45,332 --> 00:12:48,833 And Russia was fighting the Nazis. 320 00:12:48,835 --> 00:12:50,702 And Russia is suffering, 321 00:12:50,704 --> 00:12:54,506 so Joseph Stalin calls Franklin Delano Roosevelt, 322 00:12:54,508 --> 00:12:57,075 and he's like, FDR, my friend, 323 00:12:57,077 --> 00:13:00,578 can you [bleep] help me out here please? 324 00:13:00,580 --> 00:13:03,448 I'm getting my ass kicked here in Russia 325 00:13:03,450 --> 00:13:04,849 by these "Nat-zis" 'cause-- 326 00:13:04,851 --> 00:13:06,351 - "Nat-zis." 327 00:13:06,353 --> 00:13:06,985 - Not Nancys. 328 00:13:06,987 --> 00:13:09,754 - I didn't say Nancys. I said "Nat-zis." 329 00:13:09,756 --> 00:13:11,790 - Nazis, yeah, I misheard you. 330 00:13:11,792 --> 00:13:14,092 And Franklin's like, it's not up to me, man. 331 00:13:14,094 --> 00:13:15,693 I understand what you're talking about. 332 00:13:15,695 --> 00:13:18,329 It's a shit show, but I got Congress. 333 00:13:18,331 --> 00:13:19,264 I got the American people. 334 00:13:19,266 --> 00:13:21,733 I can't help you out right now because no one supports me, 335 00:13:21,735 --> 00:13:25,036 so Stalin's like, oh, [bleep]. 336 00:13:25,038 --> 00:13:26,571 Okay, I'll tell you what. 337 00:13:26,573 --> 00:13:31,209 I'm gonna send someone over there: Pavlichenko. 338 00:13:31,211 --> 00:13:32,410 Huge sniper. 339 00:13:32,412 --> 00:13:33,411 Big deal. 340 00:13:33,413 --> 00:13:34,579 Highly feared. 341 00:13:34,581 --> 00:13:38,716 The greatest sharpshooter in the history of mankind. 342 00:13:38,718 --> 00:13:39,984 Just meet with my sniper. 343 00:13:39,986 --> 00:13:44,189 So in July of 1942, Franklin Delano Roosevelt 344 00:13:44,191 --> 00:13:49,160 and his wife Eleanor are like, oh, what's happening today 345 00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:50,028 in the White House? 346 00:13:50,030 --> 00:13:51,629 We always have stuff to do. 347 00:13:51,631 --> 00:13:55,466 And Franklin says, "Oh, Eleanor, 348 00:13:55,468 --> 00:13:57,068 "we got to meet with this sniper. 349 00:13:57,070 --> 00:13:59,637 He's being sent from the Red Army," 350 00:13:59,639 --> 00:14:05,376 and the sniper is a 25-year-old woman 351 00:14:05,378 --> 00:14:08,546 named Lyudmila Pavlichenko. 352 00:14:08,548 --> 00:14:09,614 - Say it again. 353 00:14:09,616 --> 00:14:14,452 - [slowly] Lyudmila Pavlichenko. 354 00:14:14,454 --> 00:14:15,553 - Lyudmila-- 355 00:14:15,555 --> 00:14:16,921 - Pavlichenko. 356 00:14:16,923 --> 00:14:18,022 - Buh-luh-jinga. 357 00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:19,657 - Pavlichenko. 358 00:14:19,659 --> 00:14:21,392 - Pavli-jinka. 359 00:14:21,394 --> 00:14:23,728 - Pavlichenko! 360 00:14:23,730 --> 00:14:25,830 - Pavlichenko. 361 00:14:29,568 --> 00:14:30,902 - I really like you. 362 00:14:30,904 --> 00:14:32,637 We're friends. 363 00:14:32,639 --> 00:14:33,137 What? 364 00:14:33,139 --> 00:14:35,940 - I'm just letting you finish, as a gentleman. 365 00:14:35,942 --> 00:14:40,211 - You are a gentleman, but with just the right amount 366 00:14:40,213 --> 00:14:41,613 of a bastard. 367 00:14:41,615 --> 00:14:45,250 [both laughing] 368 00:14:45,252 --> 00:14:46,084 Shit. 369 00:14:46,086 --> 00:14:47,585 Oh, no, I'm drunk. 370 00:14:47,587 --> 00:14:51,689 So she says to them, "There is no color line. 371 00:14:51,691 --> 00:14:55,593 "There is no male-female segregation in the Red Army. 372 00:14:55,595 --> 00:14:57,729 "We are a nation of people 373 00:14:57,731 --> 00:15:00,031 who want to defend our motherland," 374 00:15:00,033 --> 00:15:04,402 and Eleanor, who is a feminist and a human rights advocate-- 375 00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:08,273 [bleep] badass-- takes Franklin aside and says, 376 00:15:08,275 --> 00:15:13,244 "This girl--this tomboy, sharpshooting, 377 00:15:13,246 --> 00:15:15,747 "genius killer, 378 00:15:15,749 --> 00:15:18,917 "I can take her on the road and she will get us 379 00:15:18,919 --> 00:15:23,488 enough American support to go after the Nazis." 380 00:15:23,490 --> 00:15:25,823 President Franklin Roosevelt was like, okay, 381 00:15:25,825 --> 00:15:28,159 if you think that can happen, go for it. 382 00:15:28,161 --> 00:15:31,062 So they get on a train, and they're traveling 383 00:15:31,064 --> 00:15:33,464 across the U.S., and the American press 384 00:15:33,466 --> 00:15:37,735 starts hearing about a girl sniper sent from Russia. 385 00:15:37,737 --> 00:15:39,137 She does town hall meetings. 386 00:15:39,139 --> 00:15:41,606 She meets with the local press. 387 00:15:41,608 --> 00:15:46,844 But all they want to know is why don't you wear blush? 388 00:15:46,846 --> 00:15:51,316 Are you allowed to wear makeup on the front lines? 389 00:15:51,318 --> 00:15:55,520 And then a journalist tells her, your uniform, 390 00:15:55,522 --> 00:15:57,522 the skirt's too long. 391 00:15:57,524 --> 00:15:58,756 It's drab. 392 00:15:58,758 --> 00:16:00,191 You look fat. 393 00:16:00,193 --> 00:16:03,428 And she's like, what the [bleep] are they f-- 394 00:16:03,430 --> 00:16:07,799 I'm crawling through the mud with a... 395 00:16:08,400 --> 00:16:09,934 [dogs barking] 396 00:16:09,936 --> 00:16:11,602 Coyotes! 397 00:16:11,604 --> 00:16:15,039 The coyote's eating the neighbor's cat. 398 00:16:15,407 --> 00:16:17,875 Well, we got to wait this out, right? 399 00:16:19,011 --> 00:16:20,244 So-- [chuckles] 400 00:16:20,246 --> 00:16:21,779 So--it's not funny. 401 00:16:21,781 --> 00:16:22,914 It's a serious thing. 402 00:16:22,916 --> 00:16:26,284 They finally get to Chicago halfway through their journey, 403 00:16:26,286 --> 00:16:28,453 and backstage, Eleanor Roosevelt 404 00:16:28,455 --> 00:16:30,955 is Burgess Meredith from "Rocky." 405 00:16:30,957 --> 00:16:32,390 She's just massaging her shoulders 406 00:16:32,392 --> 00:16:33,691 and saying, "Come on, you can do this. 407 00:16:33,693 --> 00:16:35,059 "I know they're asking stupid questions. 408 00:16:35,061 --> 00:16:36,995 "They're silly questions. Don't worry about it. 409 00:16:36,997 --> 00:16:37,929 "You can make it through. 410 00:16:37,931 --> 00:16:42,033 "I need you to talk to the American public 411 00:16:42,035 --> 00:16:43,534 "the way you've talked to me 412 00:16:43,536 --> 00:16:48,573 and shame America into joining the second front." 413 00:16:48,575 --> 00:16:53,411 So Lyudmila walks out on a Chicago stage 414 00:16:53,413 --> 00:16:54,779 and says, 415 00:16:54,781 --> 00:17:00,118 "Gentlemen, I am but 25 years old, 416 00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:01,819 "and I have killed 417 00:17:01,821 --> 00:17:06,057 "309 Fascist occupants in my country. 418 00:17:06,059 --> 00:17:09,160 "This uniform I wear, that you say is ugly, 419 00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:11,262 "that you say makes me look fat, 420 00:17:11,264 --> 00:17:13,898 "this uniform has dirt on it 421 00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:16,534 "and the blood of my enemies on it, 422 00:17:16,536 --> 00:17:18,069 "and I wear it with pride. 423 00:17:18,071 --> 00:17:21,606 "Don't you think you've been hiding behind my back 424 00:17:21,608 --> 00:17:23,408 for too long?" 425 00:17:24,209 --> 00:17:29,280 And the crowd goes batshit bananas, clapping, 426 00:17:29,282 --> 00:17:31,883 and Eleanor, she's backstage like, 427 00:17:31,885 --> 00:17:33,918 yeah, Lyudmila! 428 00:17:33,920 --> 00:17:34,986 I love it! 429 00:17:34,988 --> 00:17:36,120 Go, girl! 430 00:17:36,122 --> 00:17:37,221 [triumphant music] 431 00:17:37,223 --> 00:17:38,556 But-- [groans] 432 00:17:38,558 --> 00:17:39,524 Jesus. 433 00:17:39,526 --> 00:17:40,625 I got to burp. 434 00:17:40,627 --> 00:17:42,126 My stomach's making noise. 435 00:17:42,128 --> 00:17:44,929 I'm trying to talk about WWII. 436 00:17:45,464 --> 00:17:46,664 It's too much. 437 00:17:46,666 --> 00:17:49,867 ♪ ♪ 438 00:17:51,470 --> 00:17:54,238 - Okay, so Eleanor Roosevelt and Lyudmila Pavlichenko 439 00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:59,477 are going from town to town, and she's no longer a curiosity 440 00:17:59,479 --> 00:18:00,211 or an oddity. 441 00:18:00,213 --> 00:18:03,815 She's, like, this impressive folk hero. 442 00:18:03,817 --> 00:18:06,284 She's an amazing woman, 443 00:18:06,286 --> 00:18:07,785 who was so young, 444 00:18:07,787 --> 00:18:13,057 doing the work of dozens of men at 25 years old. 445 00:18:13,059 --> 00:18:18,729 When I was 25, I think I plucked off all my eyebrows 446 00:18:18,731 --> 00:18:20,298 and dressed like Prince. 447 00:18:20,300 --> 00:18:20,932 - [laughs] 448 00:18:20,934 --> 00:18:26,037 - Anyway, 15 yeas later, we are in a Cold War with Russia. 449 00:18:26,039 --> 00:18:29,207 Eleanor is in Moscow and has a political minder 450 00:18:29,209 --> 00:18:32,810 that says, "You can't really talk to anyone about anything. 451 00:18:32,812 --> 00:18:35,046 "You're gonna eat some sablefish. 452 00:18:35,048 --> 00:18:36,080 "You're gonna drink some vodka. 453 00:18:36,082 --> 00:18:40,318 "You're gonna wear a furry hat showing that it's not that bad 454 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:41,586 "between Russia and America. 455 00:18:41,588 --> 00:18:43,020 That's your job, lady." 456 00:18:43,022 --> 00:18:46,090 And she's like, uh... 457 00:18:46,092 --> 00:18:46,757 no. 458 00:18:46,759 --> 00:18:49,560 I'm Eleanor goddamn Roosevelt, 459 00:18:49,562 --> 00:18:53,164 and I'm gonna go and see my [bleep] pal. 460 00:18:53,166 --> 00:18:56,067 This emissary takes Eleanor Roosevelt 461 00:18:56,069 --> 00:18:58,803 to Lyudmila Pavlichenko's house. 462 00:18:58,805 --> 00:19:02,840 This woman was a national hero, but she's living 463 00:19:02,842 --> 00:19:05,943 in this tiny two-room apartment, 464 00:19:05,945 --> 00:19:08,646 and Lyudmila opens the door. 465 00:19:08,648 --> 00:19:09,747 Hello, Lyudmila. 466 00:19:09,749 --> 00:19:12,083 Hello, Mrs. Roosevelt. 467 00:19:12,085 --> 00:19:16,954 Like, Eleanor and Lyudmila are sitting formally 468 00:19:16,956 --> 00:19:20,625 with the Russian minder, and at a certain point, 469 00:19:20,627 --> 00:19:23,995 Lyudmila makes an excuse and says, "Oh, oh, oh. 470 00:19:23,997 --> 00:19:26,164 "Sorry, sorry. Have to leave," 471 00:19:26,166 --> 00:19:29,767 and finds a way to take Eleanor away 472 00:19:29,769 --> 00:19:34,071 from the Russian minder, and she's half-laughing, 473 00:19:34,073 --> 00:19:36,741 half-crying, and she's hugging Eleanor and saying, 474 00:19:36,743 --> 00:19:41,679 "Oh, my friend, it's so good to see you after all these years." 475 00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:42,346 [chuckles] 476 00:19:42,348 --> 00:19:45,883 "And think about all the friends we met 477 00:19:45,885 --> 00:19:47,385 on our trip across the U.S.," 478 00:19:47,387 --> 00:19:50,688 and Eleanor's so happy to talk to her, just saying, 479 00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:55,326 "Oh, Lyudmila, we did have a great time, didn't we?" 480 00:19:55,328 --> 00:19:59,730 And these two incredibly powerful, smart women 481 00:19:59,732 --> 00:20:05,236 saved millions of lives by engendering the American public 482 00:20:05,238 --> 00:20:07,438 into joining the war effort, 483 00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:10,041 and it was such an important part of history, 484 00:20:10,043 --> 00:20:15,179 but it's just two women happy to see each other and saying, 485 00:20:15,181 --> 00:20:19,116 "Do you remember that time we went to Chicago?" 486 00:20:19,118 --> 00:20:20,384 Shit. 487 00:20:20,386 --> 00:20:21,319 [groans] 488 00:20:21,321 --> 00:20:23,120 God damn it. 489 00:20:23,122 --> 00:20:25,122 I think it's really touching. 490 00:20:25,124 --> 00:20:28,092 [triumphant music] 491 00:20:28,094 --> 00:20:30,161 Cheers. 492 00:20:30,163 --> 00:20:31,128 [chuckles] 493 00:20:31,130 --> 00:20:32,630 ♪ ♪ 494 00:20:32,632 --> 00:20:34,232 Sorry. - Don't talk. 495 00:20:34,234 --> 00:20:35,900 Oh, you got to do it again. 496 00:20:35,902 --> 00:20:37,034 You talked. 497 00:20:37,036 --> 00:20:38,369 - What? 498 00:20:38,371 --> 00:20:46,711 ♪ ♪ 499 00:21:04,129 --> 00:21:05,296 [quirky music] 500 00:21:05,298 --> 00:21:06,330 - Did you get that? 501 00:21:06,332 --> 00:21:08,299 [ice cubes clinking] 502 00:21:08,301 --> 00:21:11,535 That's sound-- 503 00:21:11,537 --> 00:21:13,037 sound-scaping. 504 00:21:13,039 --> 00:21:14,105 [laughs] 505 00:21:14,107 --> 00:21:18,175 I want a composing credit. [laughs]