1 00:00:04,646 --> 00:00:06,381 Previously on The Affair... 2 00:00:06,465 --> 00:00:08,216 - You were a good dad... - [door closes] 3 00:00:08,300 --> 00:00:10,701 ...and Mom was a great mom and... 4 00:00:10,785 --> 00:00:11,954 and we were happy. 5 00:00:12,038 --> 00:00:14,055 - Hello, friend. - Hello, friend. 6 00:00:14,139 --> 00:00:15,723 [Whitney] Or at least I thought we were. 7 00:00:15,807 --> 00:00:17,434 Do you know why I m-married you? 8 00:00:17,518 --> 00:00:19,283 I thought you were safe. 9 00:00:19,367 --> 00:00:22,440 I knew you would never cheat, you wouldn't leave, 10 00:00:22,524 --> 00:00:24,691 and we would have a nice life. 11 00:00:24,775 --> 00:00:28,903 It's so hard, living up to your goddamn standards all the time. 12 00:00:28,987 --> 00:00:32,323 Dad, what the fuck?! [screams] 13 00:00:32,407 --> 00:00:35,871 [Whitney] I thought that he'd turned a corner or something. 14 00:00:35,955 --> 00:00:37,579 After everything he's already put us through. 15 00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:40,248 Sometimes with toxic people, you have 16 00:00:40,332 --> 00:00:42,459 to make a clean break. 17 00:00:42,543 --> 00:00:44,198 [Noah over phone] "Over the course of my reporting 18 00:00:44,282 --> 00:00:46,146 on Solloway, six women, three of whom 19 00:00:46,230 --> 00:00:48,423 - wish to remain anonymous..." - What? 20 00:00:48,507 --> 00:00:50,267 - [phone chimes] - Is that news? 21 00:00:50,351 --> 00:00:52,343 [Noah] That was just a brushfire near the Getty. 22 00:00:52,427 --> 00:00:54,053 [Helen] How did that reporter know 23 00:00:54,137 --> 00:00:55,638 how to find Eden? 24 00:00:56,711 --> 00:00:58,564 Because you told her? 25 00:00:58,648 --> 00:01:00,308 I'm not the bad guy here. 26 00:01:00,392 --> 00:01:03,938 Noah's name is off the movie, his movie. 27 00:01:04,022 --> 00:01:06,191 Because that's what you wanted. 28 00:01:06,275 --> 00:01:09,277 This movie is my baby. 29 00:01:09,361 --> 00:01:11,863 All of this is my fault. 30 00:01:11,947 --> 00:01:13,615 Your dad didn't do anything wrong. 31 00:01:13,699 --> 00:01:15,390 Why are you still defending him? 32 00:01:15,474 --> 00:01:17,368 Because he's your father, and you guys need your father. 33 00:01:17,452 --> 00:01:18,953 Don't say that. This isn't about us. 34 00:01:19,037 --> 00:01:20,718 This has never been about us. 35 00:01:20,802 --> 00:01:22,985 - What is it about? - You could never let him go. 36 00:01:32,105 --> 00:01:35,178 ♪ I was screaming into the canyon ♪ 37 00:01:35,262 --> 00:01:38,231 ♪ At the moment of my death ♪ 38 00:01:38,890 --> 00:01:41,918 ♪ The echo I created ♪ 39 00:01:42,002 --> 00:01:44,938 ♪ Outlasted my last breath ♪ 40 00:01:45,022 --> 00:01:48,191 ♪ My voice it made an avalanche ♪ 41 00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:51,236 ♪ And buried a man I never knew ♪ 42 00:01:51,320 --> 00:01:54,447 ♪ And when he died, his widowed bride ♪ 43 00:01:54,531 --> 00:01:57,075 ♪ Met your daddy and they made you ♪ 44 00:01:57,159 --> 00:01:58,967 ♪ I have only one thing to do ♪ 45 00:01:59,051 --> 00:02:01,496 ♪ And that's be the wave that I am, and then ♪ 46 00:02:01,580 --> 00:02:03,686 ♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪ 47 00:02:03,770 --> 00:02:05,729 ♪ I have only one thing to do ♪ 48 00:02:05,813 --> 00:02:08,169 ♪ And that's be the wave that I am, and then ♪ 49 00:02:08,253 --> 00:02:10,588 ♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪ 50 00:02:11,426 --> 00:02:13,243 ♪ I have only one thing to do ♪ 51 00:02:13,327 --> 00:02:15,022 ♪ And that's be the wave that I am, and then ♪ 52 00:02:15,106 --> 00:02:18,221 ♪ Sink back into the ocean, sink back into the ocean ♪ 53 00:02:18,305 --> 00:02:19,959 ♪ Sink back into the o... ♪ 54 00:02:20,043 --> 00:02:21,516 ♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪ 55 00:02:21,600 --> 00:02:23,184 ♪ Sink back into the o... ♪ 56 00:02:23,268 --> 00:02:25,003 ♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪ 57 00:02:25,087 --> 00:02:27,648 ♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪ 58 00:02:29,594 --> 00:02:37,594 Sync and corrections by btsix www.addic7ed.com 59 00:02:41,022 --> 00:02:43,023 _ 60 00:02:43,107 --> 00:02:43,964 [Whitney] You're a narcissist. 61 00:02:44,048 --> 00:02:45,944 You're a vampire. You have no soul. 62 00:02:46,028 --> 00:02:47,208 - Whitney. - You burn through people, 63 00:02:47,292 --> 00:02:48,626 and when you're done using them, 64 00:02:48,710 --> 00:02:50,253 you just leave them on the side of the road. 65 00:02:50,337 --> 00:02:51,988 All right, honey, calm down. 66 00:02:52,072 --> 00:02:53,881 Alison probably fucking killed herself 67 00:02:53,965 --> 00:02:55,216 because of what you did to her. 68 00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:56,843 - Stop it! - And you? 69 00:02:56,927 --> 00:02:59,103 You can't survive without him, can you? 70 00:02:59,187 --> 00:03:00,555 You're a codependent nightmare. 71 00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:01,889 - [Noah] Please, that's enough. - I fucking hate you both. 72 00:03:01,973 --> 00:03:04,184 - That's enough! - You deserve each other! 73 00:03:09,088 --> 00:03:11,215 [Noah crying] 74 00:03:32,929 --> 00:03:35,006 Is it true, what she said about the hot tub? 75 00:03:39,953 --> 00:03:41,721 I didn't know it was her. I... 76 00:03:41,805 --> 00:03:43,723 [siren wailing in distance] 77 00:03:52,580 --> 00:03:53,634 I... 78 00:03:55,930 --> 00:03:57,362 I'm gonna go talk to her. 79 00:03:57,446 --> 00:03:59,322 - I'm gonna leave... - No, you can't fucking leave. 80 00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:01,116 Okay? You can't run away. 81 00:04:02,021 --> 00:04:03,757 Because we have to fix this. 82 00:04:05,829 --> 00:04:07,789 So I'm gonna go talk to her, 83 00:04:07,873 --> 00:04:09,583 and don't go anywhere. 84 00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:29,436 [sighs] 85 00:04:37,032 --> 00:04:38,774 Look, I know you're upset. 86 00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:43,872 We're all upset. 87 00:04:48,579 --> 00:04:51,332 It's been a terrible, terrible day. 88 00:04:51,416 --> 00:04:52,501 But... 89 00:04:55,754 --> 00:04:57,110 ...your dad... 90 00:05:01,084 --> 00:05:03,515 Look, he's made mistakes. 91 00:05:03,599 --> 00:05:06,890 Nobody knows that better than I do. 92 00:05:08,322 --> 00:05:10,406 But he's not a bad man. 93 00:05:11,367 --> 00:05:14,259 I mean, don't you think he's being punished enough right now? 94 00:05:14,343 --> 00:05:15,356 By everybody? 95 00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:16,817 By the world? 96 00:05:18,343 --> 00:05:21,497 And, Whitney, I-I don't think this is the time to fight. 97 00:05:21,581 --> 00:05:23,198 We need to support each other. 98 00:05:23,949 --> 00:05:25,600 We're family. 99 00:05:28,352 --> 00:05:29,903 What did you just say? 100 00:05:38,340 --> 00:05:40,230 We're the only family you have, Whitney. 101 00:05:40,314 --> 00:05:42,168 We are not a fucking family. 102 00:05:42,994 --> 00:05:45,145 And I'm tired of pretending like we are. 103 00:05:45,765 --> 00:05:47,267 You're holding onto a myth. 104 00:05:47,351 --> 00:05:49,261 Okay, I know. You're upset. 105 00:05:49,345 --> 00:05:52,769 Yes, I'm upset. I'm very upset. 106 00:05:52,853 --> 00:05:54,688 But I'm not crazy. 107 00:05:55,981 --> 00:05:58,547 It's obviously more important to you 108 00:05:58,631 --> 00:06:01,404 to hold on to a fantasy of being a perfect mom, 109 00:06:01,488 --> 00:06:03,564 of being the one who held us all together than it is 110 00:06:03,648 --> 00:06:07,885 for you to admit that this whole thing is a fucking charade. 111 00:06:08,523 --> 00:06:11,621 Dad only cares about himself, and you only care about Dad. 112 00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:13,901 That is not true. 113 00:06:13,985 --> 00:06:15,208 Yes, it is. 114 00:06:15,292 --> 00:06:18,127 [slow, dramatic music] 115 00:06:18,851 --> 00:06:21,756 Will you please come back outside 116 00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:23,839 and just talk to us? 117 00:06:25,116 --> 00:06:27,351 I mean, you're getting married in three weeks. 118 00:06:27,435 --> 00:06:30,421 How-how are we gonna do that if you're not even talking to us? 119 00:06:30,505 --> 00:06:32,394 I mean, how is he gonna walk you down the aisle? 120 00:06:32,478 --> 00:06:34,019 He's not. 121 00:06:37,185 --> 00:06:38,439 What? 122 00:06:39,031 --> 00:06:41,442 He's not gonna walk me down the aisle 123 00:06:41,808 --> 00:06:43,711 because he's not coming to my wedding. 124 00:06:43,795 --> 00:06:45,609 Of course he's invited to your wedding. 125 00:06:47,610 --> 00:06:49,529 He's your father. 126 00:06:49,613 --> 00:06:53,030 You know, he made you. He and I. 127 00:06:53,114 --> 00:06:57,291 We made you. You wouldn't be here without us. 128 00:06:57,375 --> 00:06:59,293 - You don't get it. - I do get it. I just think 129 00:06:59,377 --> 00:07:01,170 you're being kind of shortsighted right now 130 00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:02,838 and actually pretty fucking cruel. 131 00:07:02,922 --> 00:07:04,298 You know, all I want for myself in life 132 00:07:04,382 --> 00:07:06,259 is not to end up like you. 133 00:07:23,985 --> 00:07:25,820 Jesus. Fucking Noah. 134 00:07:25,904 --> 00:07:27,947 [door opens] 135 00:07:29,949 --> 00:07:31,450 [sighs] 136 00:07:31,534 --> 00:07:33,071 Where's Dad? 137 00:07:33,155 --> 00:07:35,329 He had to go take care of stuff. 138 00:07:35,413 --> 00:07:36,806 [Colin] Where's Whitney? 139 00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:38,041 She's in the bedroom. 140 00:07:39,464 --> 00:07:40,974 [Stacey] What now? 141 00:07:41,058 --> 00:07:43,462 [Trevor] Well, I'm starving. 142 00:07:43,546 --> 00:07:45,325 Wonder if Whitney's got any food. 143 00:07:45,409 --> 00:07:46,865 Mom, what now? 144 00:07:46,949 --> 00:07:48,784 You're gonna have to just give me a minute. 145 00:07:48,868 --> 00:07:50,595 Okay, honey? Please. 146 00:07:52,597 --> 00:07:53,898 [emergency alert sounding] 147 00:08:06,999 --> 00:08:08,417 [line ringing] 148 00:08:08,501 --> 00:08:10,712 [Noah] Hi, it's Noah. Leave a message. 149 00:08:13,201 --> 00:08:15,077 [line ringing] 150 00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:17,122 Hi, it's Noah. Leave a message. 151 00:08:20,417 --> 00:08:22,043 Mrs. Solloway? 152 00:08:22,127 --> 00:08:24,045 Uh, Butler. Call me Mrs. But I... 153 00:08:24,129 --> 00:08:27,256 No-no, just call-call me Helen. 154 00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,139 [Colin] Uh, I'm sorry to ask this 155 00:08:29,223 --> 00:08:31,106 at what I know is a very stressful time, 156 00:08:31,190 --> 00:08:32,501 but might you have any idea 157 00:08:32,585 --> 00:08:34,316 where Whitney's birth certificate is? 158 00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:36,891 Uh... wh... her birth... What? 159 00:08:36,975 --> 00:08:38,917 [Colin] Yeah, we need it to get our marriage license. 160 00:08:39,001 --> 00:08:40,520 Oh, um... 161 00:08:42,377 --> 00:08:44,482 Yeah, I'm sure I have it somewhere. I can get it. 162 00:08:44,566 --> 00:08:45,983 That would be great. 163 00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:47,735 We actually are about to miss the deadline, 164 00:08:47,819 --> 00:08:49,445 and if we don't have that, I'll miss the deadline 165 00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:50,738 for my green card. 166 00:08:50,822 --> 00:08:52,239 Shit. 167 00:08:52,323 --> 00:08:53,574 - What? - It's not at my house. 168 00:08:53,658 --> 00:08:55,659 - It's at Noah's house. - Why? 169 00:08:55,743 --> 00:08:58,220 Because that's what happens when you get divorced, Whitney. 170 00:08:58,304 --> 00:09:00,828 You split up the the passports and the birth certificates. 171 00:09:00,912 --> 00:09:03,209 - Why? - So neither one of us will, 172 00:09:03,293 --> 00:09:05,755 I don't know, flee the country with all of you guys. 173 00:09:05,839 --> 00:09:07,088 I took Martin and Stacey's, 174 00:09:07,172 --> 00:09:08,923 your dad took yours and Whitney's. 175 00:09:09,007 --> 00:09:10,216 Why would you give mine to Dad? 176 00:09:10,300 --> 00:09:12,120 Oh, clearly, because I was trying to traumatize you. 177 00:09:12,204 --> 00:09:13,307 I mean, what the fuck, Whitney? 178 00:09:13,391 --> 00:09:14,417 We just divided 'em up randomly. 179 00:09:16,120 --> 00:09:18,330 You know what? 180 00:09:18,414 --> 00:09:20,226 Uh, I'm just gonna go get it. 181 00:09:20,310 --> 00:09:22,848 - Myself. - [Stacey] Wait, are you leaving? 182 00:09:22,932 --> 00:09:24,554 Yeah. You're gonna be okay, sweetheart. 183 00:09:24,638 --> 00:09:27,307 Don't worry about it. Your sister is here. 184 00:09:27,391 --> 00:09:28,609 All right? She can take care of you 185 00:09:28,693 --> 00:09:30,895 for a little while. I think it would be good for her 186 00:09:30,979 --> 00:09:34,198 to be responsible for somebody besides herself for a change. 187 00:09:34,282 --> 00:09:36,076 [sighs] 188 00:09:36,659 --> 00:09:38,286 See what it's like. 189 00:09:40,330 --> 00:09:41,622 [newswoman] Voluntary evacuations are underway 190 00:09:41,706 --> 00:09:44,792 for Topanga Canyon and surrounding areas. 191 00:09:44,876 --> 00:09:48,297 The fire continues to grow, with zero percent containment. 192 00:09:48,381 --> 00:09:50,306 Fire officials are suggesting anyone living 193 00:09:50,390 --> 00:09:53,926 in the area to make preparations to evacuate. 194 00:09:54,010 --> 00:09:55,469 [newsman] More than 200 firefighters 195 00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:57,346 are already involved in fighting the blaze, 196 00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:58,461 with more on the... 197 00:09:58,545 --> 00:10:00,182 [slow, somber music] 198 00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:02,393 ♪♪♪ 199 00:10:04,145 --> 00:10:06,231 Noah? 200 00:10:24,082 --> 00:10:26,960 ♪♪♪ 201 00:10:32,966 --> 00:10:34,264 Noah. 202 00:10:40,765 --> 00:10:43,059 Noah, wake up. 203 00:10:45,687 --> 00:10:48,022 Noah. 204 00:10:48,106 --> 00:10:50,483 Come on. Noah. 205 00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:57,782 [mutters] 206 00:11:25,018 --> 00:11:26,853 [sighs] 207 00:11:38,281 --> 00:11:41,117 [sighs] 208 00:11:46,206 --> 00:11:48,917 [birds chirping] 209 00:12:01,387 --> 00:12:03,597 [drawer opens] 210 00:12:03,681 --> 00:12:05,891 How do you not know where it is? 211 00:12:05,975 --> 00:12:07,101 It should be in here. 212 00:12:07,185 --> 00:12:08,881 This is where I keep most of my important stuff. 213 00:12:08,965 --> 00:12:10,688 It's not there. I don't know where the fuck it went. 214 00:12:10,772 --> 00:12:12,064 Clearly. 215 00:12:12,148 --> 00:12:13,983 Helen, it's not in with my spoons. 216 00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:16,070 Well, who knows? It could be anywhere, right? 217 00:12:16,154 --> 00:12:18,195 Could you stop doing that? 218 00:12:18,279 --> 00:12:20,030 Why, I'm sorry, is it bothering you? 219 00:12:20,114 --> 00:12:22,283 - Do you have a hangover? - Stop that! Stop it! 220 00:12:22,367 --> 00:12:25,578 How the fuck did you not know it was her in the hot tub? 221 00:12:29,154 --> 00:12:30,792 What are you really asking? 222 00:12:33,713 --> 00:12:35,868 Because I find it highly improbable you could get 223 00:12:35,952 --> 00:12:38,184 that close to your own daughter and not recognize her. 224 00:12:39,444 --> 00:12:41,927 Oh, so you're saying that I-I did recognize her? 225 00:12:42,011 --> 00:12:43,388 And I went after her? 226 00:12:45,634 --> 00:12:46,933 Helen? 227 00:12:49,472 --> 00:12:51,478 - No. - Are you sure? 'Cause if that's 228 00:12:51,562 --> 00:12:52,973 - what you really think... - I don't, I don't. 229 00:12:54,973 --> 00:12:56,150 So you're just trying to make me feel like 230 00:12:56,234 --> 00:12:57,318 a complete shit for no reason? 231 00:12:57,402 --> 00:12:59,752 No, no, not for no reason! 232 00:12:59,836 --> 00:13:00,932 There's a reason. 233 00:13:01,016 --> 00:13:02,656 Years ago, you traumatized our daughter 234 00:13:02,740 --> 00:13:04,678 and you never even fucking mentioned it! 235 00:13:04,762 --> 00:13:06,983 And at this point, Noah, I don't know 236 00:13:07,067 --> 00:13:11,391 if you're stupid or evil or crazy or all three. 237 00:13:11,475 --> 00:13:13,959 But you really should definitely feel like a complete shit. 238 00:13:14,043 --> 00:13:15,663 - I do! - Good! 239 00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:20,466 What was she even doing at that party, Helen? 240 00:13:20,550 --> 00:13:21,912 - Oh, my God. - She was in high school. 241 00:13:21,996 --> 00:13:23,412 What was she doing out in Montauk 242 00:13:23,496 --> 00:13:24,727 by herself, in a hurricane? 243 00:13:24,811 --> 00:13:26,388 Are you really trying to say that this is my fault? 244 00:13:26,472 --> 00:13:28,627 Oh, no, of course not. Nothing's ever your fault. 245 00:13:28,711 --> 00:13:30,650 Oh, please. You are incredible. 246 00:13:30,734 --> 00:13:33,771 I am so fucking tired of you lecturing me. 247 00:13:33,855 --> 00:13:37,326 With your self-important, fucking self-righteous, 248 00:13:37,410 --> 00:13:38,651 holier-than-thou... 249 00:13:38,735 --> 00:13:40,987 You don't think I fucking hate myself for that night? 250 00:13:41,071 --> 00:13:42,244 That was the worst night of my life... 251 00:13:42,328 --> 00:13:43,977 - Oh, my God. Your life? - Yes! 252 00:13:44,061 --> 00:13:46,200 My life. My fucking life! 253 00:13:47,409 --> 00:13:50,322 I lost my daughter that night. You don't think I know that?! 254 00:13:52,631 --> 00:13:54,841 You don't think I've been trying ever since 255 00:13:55,709 --> 00:13:57,711 to try and make it up to her? 256 00:13:57,795 --> 00:14:02,008 I would do anything... anything... To undo what happened. 257 00:14:05,928 --> 00:14:07,973 And finally, finally, 258 00:14:08,057 --> 00:14:10,002 last week in Montauk, I... 259 00:14:10,833 --> 00:14:14,186 preparing for the wedding, we had fun and... 260 00:14:14,270 --> 00:14:16,730 [sighs] 261 00:14:16,814 --> 00:14:19,233 We were father and daughter again. 262 00:14:21,611 --> 00:14:22,736 If I could just give her that. 263 00:14:22,820 --> 00:14:24,869 If I can just give her a good wedding 264 00:14:24,953 --> 00:14:26,176 with us all there together 265 00:14:26,260 --> 00:14:28,868 - having fun, then... - She doesn't want you there. 266 00:14:31,823 --> 00:14:33,106 What do you mean? 267 00:14:34,649 --> 00:14:36,691 I mean, you're not invited to the wedding. 268 00:14:37,495 --> 00:14:38,627 What, she said that? 269 00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:40,004 Yeah. 270 00:14:44,923 --> 00:14:46,427 Jesus Christ. 271 00:15:09,908 --> 00:15:11,202 Oh, wow. 272 00:15:13,287 --> 00:15:14,914 [chuckles] 273 00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:24,924 What's this? "Dear-dear Helen..."? 274 00:15:29,802 --> 00:15:32,723 That's the letter I wrote to you the night before our wedding. 275 00:15:34,275 --> 00:15:35,518 Why do you have it? 276 00:15:37,001 --> 00:15:39,099 'Cause I found it in the trash 277 00:15:40,131 --> 00:15:41,774 in your parents' guest room the next day, 278 00:15:41,858 --> 00:15:43,509 and so I fished it out and kept it. 279 00:15:50,026 --> 00:15:51,325 What does it say? 280 00:15:57,367 --> 00:15:59,202 "Dear Helen." 281 00:16:03,087 --> 00:16:05,923 "I can't believe tomorrow is our wedding day." 282 00:16:09,579 --> 00:16:11,506 "I love you so much. 283 00:16:12,566 --> 00:16:16,558 You're the best thing that ever happened to me. 284 00:16:16,642 --> 00:16:18,310 I know we've had some hard times, 285 00:16:18,394 --> 00:16:21,063 but I'm so glad we've stuck it out." [chuckles] 286 00:16:23,566 --> 00:16:25,067 "I love what we have and are building together, 287 00:16:25,151 --> 00:16:28,362 and I think you and I are worth the effort." 288 00:16:30,404 --> 00:16:32,866 "I have countless superlatives for you, 289 00:16:32,950 --> 00:16:36,354 but at the risk of belaboring, 290 00:16:36,438 --> 00:16:39,582 I think you're beautiful..." 291 00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:45,796 ...uh, "sexy, brilliant, kind, tough, strong, 292 00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:49,216 brave, gentle, creative, funny, thoughtful. 293 00:16:49,300 --> 00:16:50,926 You're a really good person, but mostly you're the person 294 00:16:51,010 --> 00:16:53,554 whom I'm most excited to see every day. 295 00:16:53,638 --> 00:16:58,225 I'm so grateful you're gonna be my wife. 296 00:16:58,309 --> 00:16:59,832 Love, Noah." 297 00:17:01,229 --> 00:17:03,230 [clears throat] 298 00:17:03,314 --> 00:17:04,606 [slow, dramatic music] 299 00:17:04,690 --> 00:17:07,568 ♪♪♪ 300 00:17:11,271 --> 00:17:13,146 Did you think I threw that away? 301 00:17:14,935 --> 00:17:16,535 I didn't know. 302 00:17:18,049 --> 00:17:22,291 Well, I wouldn't have. I just... 303 00:17:22,827 --> 00:17:24,454 I probably just put it somewhere. 304 00:17:24,538 --> 00:17:25,664 I'm so careless. 305 00:17:30,009 --> 00:17:32,708 You used to write me letters like this all the time. 306 00:17:36,413 --> 00:17:38,499 Well, I wanted to be a writer. 307 00:17:40,977 --> 00:17:42,837 Yeah, and I just assumed 308 00:17:44,689 --> 00:17:46,773 there'd be more of them, that they'd just keep coming. 309 00:17:46,857 --> 00:17:49,098 I never imagined you'd stop loving me. 310 00:17:53,596 --> 00:17:55,014 [banging on door] 311 00:18:05,585 --> 00:18:07,878 - Hi. - Hey. 312 00:18:07,962 --> 00:18:10,711 Hi, folks. We're starting a mandatory evacuation. 313 00:18:10,795 --> 00:18:11,882 [Noah] I'm sorry, what? 314 00:18:11,966 --> 00:18:13,425 [sheriff] The winds shifted overnight. 315 00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:14,843 The fire's headed towards the canyon. 316 00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:16,762 - Shit. - It's only a few miles away now 317 00:18:16,846 --> 00:18:19,014 and it's burning quickly. You have to leave. 318 00:18:19,098 --> 00:18:20,647 You mean, like, right now? 319 00:18:20,731 --> 00:18:22,309 Yes, and if you have a car, there are 320 00:18:22,393 --> 00:18:24,186 a few people making their way down the main road on foot. 321 00:18:24,270 --> 00:18:26,104 We're asking people with any extra room to pick them up. 322 00:18:26,188 --> 00:18:27,617 Okay, yeah, sure. 323 00:18:27,701 --> 00:18:30,943 - We'll see you down there. - Yeah. 324 00:18:31,027 --> 00:18:32,945 Okay, what...? Should we just do... 325 00:18:33,029 --> 00:18:35,448 get some water bottles or something? Or, uh... 326 00:18:37,158 --> 00:18:38,615 Do you have a fire extinguisher? 327 00:18:38,699 --> 00:18:40,029 Is that a stupid idea? 328 00:18:40,113 --> 00:18:42,037 What about Whitney's birth certificate? 329 00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:43,372 You know what? Fuck it. 330 00:18:43,456 --> 00:18:45,539 There are other ways to get a birth certificate. Come on. 331 00:18:45,623 --> 00:18:47,294 Put your shoes on. 332 00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:52,506 What are you doing? 333 00:18:52,590 --> 00:18:54,337 I can't go. 334 00:18:54,421 --> 00:18:55,744 What? 335 00:18:55,828 --> 00:18:58,529 - I'm not going. - What are you talking about? 336 00:18:58,613 --> 00:18:59,930 I don't know what to take, Helen. 337 00:19:00,014 --> 00:19:02,849 Nothing. Take nothing. I mean, we don't have any time. 338 00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:05,477 Well, I-I-I can't just leave it here. What if it burns? 339 00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:07,187 So let it burn. It's all just stuff. 340 00:19:07,271 --> 00:19:09,523 It's not just stuff. It's all I've got. 341 00:19:09,607 --> 00:19:10,732 - Noah. - Helen, 342 00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:13,353 you don't understand. You have the kids, I don't. 343 00:19:13,944 --> 00:19:16,071 They don't want anything to do with me anymore. 344 00:19:16,155 --> 00:19:17,948 This is all I've got left. 345 00:19:19,908 --> 00:19:22,911 Everything that happened, it's here, it's all this... 346 00:19:22,995 --> 00:19:26,248 photo albums and letters and... 347 00:19:29,423 --> 00:19:31,169 I can't just leave it. I can't. 348 00:19:31,253 --> 00:19:34,381 Okay. Fine, we'll put it all in the fucking car. Let's just go. 349 00:19:34,465 --> 00:19:37,050 - No... you go. I'm-I'm staying. - No, I'm not leaving here... 350 00:19:37,134 --> 00:19:38,511 Just fucking go, Helen! 351 00:19:41,255 --> 00:19:42,806 What are you doing here anyway? 352 00:19:42,890 --> 00:19:44,683 - What do you mean? - Why did you come here? 353 00:19:44,767 --> 00:19:46,018 I... because... [stammers] 354 00:19:46,102 --> 00:19:48,103 To find the-the birth certificate. 355 00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:49,229 Well, you could've just called me, 356 00:19:49,313 --> 00:19:50,960 - told me to look for it. - I did call you. 357 00:19:51,044 --> 00:19:52,816 I called you twice and you didn't answer. 358 00:19:52,900 --> 00:19:55,319 No, I think Whitney's right. I think you, I think you have... 359 00:19:56,946 --> 00:19:59,697 I think you have some weird codependency with me 360 00:19:59,781 --> 00:20:02,368 or some obsession, I-I don't know what it is. It's not right. 361 00:20:06,762 --> 00:20:08,484 Are you serious right now? 362 00:20:08,568 --> 00:20:11,814 It's not appropriate, Helen. I'm not your husband anymore. 363 00:20:16,087 --> 00:20:17,432 You shouldn't be here. 364 00:20:29,002 --> 00:20:31,439 I hope you burn. 365 00:20:39,488 --> 00:20:41,407 [helicopter blades whirring] 366 00:20:52,341 --> 00:20:53,681 You guys want a ride? 367 00:20:53,765 --> 00:20:55,801 - That would be great, thank you. - All right, get in. 368 00:20:57,194 --> 00:20:58,235 All right, I got it. 369 00:21:03,888 --> 00:21:06,891 - Thank you. - Yeah. 370 00:21:09,894 --> 00:21:12,270 - Thank you. - Where's the...? Ah. 371 00:21:12,354 --> 00:21:13,439 [car chimes] 372 00:21:18,110 --> 00:21:19,403 Okay, let's go. 373 00:21:25,701 --> 00:21:28,453 I'm Anna. This is John. 374 00:21:28,537 --> 00:21:30,205 Th-Thank you again. 375 00:21:30,289 --> 00:21:32,124 Our car broke down the other day. 376 00:21:32,208 --> 00:21:34,960 I was gonna fix it this morning, but my wife is so pregnant... 377 00:21:35,044 --> 00:21:37,170 Thank you, seriously. 378 00:21:37,254 --> 00:21:38,922 It's gonna be okay. 379 00:21:39,006 --> 00:21:41,258 This car was built to withstand a chemical attack, 380 00:21:41,342 --> 00:21:43,146 so it's gonna be okay. You all right? 381 00:21:43,230 --> 00:21:45,846 I think there's some water back there in the door. 382 00:21:45,930 --> 00:21:47,055 [car horns honking] 383 00:21:47,139 --> 00:21:49,015 [John] What's that noise? 384 00:21:49,099 --> 00:21:50,434 [Anna] What's happening? 385 00:21:52,728 --> 00:21:54,605 [honking continues] 386 00:21:58,359 --> 00:21:59,860 [sighs] 387 00:21:59,944 --> 00:22:01,821 Oh, my God. 388 00:22:03,364 --> 00:22:04,781 [fire truck horn honks] 389 00:22:04,865 --> 00:22:07,367 [sirens wailing] 390 00:22:07,451 --> 00:22:09,662 [Helen] Where is the apocalypse button? 391 00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:17,263 How do you survive chemical warfare 392 00:22:17,347 --> 00:22:18,754 in this car? 393 00:22:20,339 --> 00:22:23,049 [Anna] It was your fucking idea to move here, John. 394 00:22:23,133 --> 00:22:24,885 I wanted to live in Marina del Rey, 395 00:22:24,969 --> 00:22:26,219 but you were like, 396 00:22:26,303 --> 00:22:29,222 "Let's move to Topanga. That way nobody will bother us." 397 00:22:29,306 --> 00:22:31,933 I like when people bother us. 398 00:22:32,017 --> 00:22:34,311 I like having people around. 399 00:22:34,395 --> 00:22:34,895 We're about to have a baby, for Christ's sakes. 400 00:22:34,979 --> 00:22:36,637 [John] Yeah, I know. 401 00:22:36,721 --> 00:22:39,941 [Anna] So maybe it's time for you to get over 402 00:22:40,025 --> 00:22:41,401 your fucking social anxiety, 403 00:22:41,485 --> 00:22:44,289 take your Xanax, and face the world. 404 00:22:44,373 --> 00:22:45,906 It's not just you anymore. 405 00:22:45,990 --> 00:22:48,033 - There's three of us now. - [siren chirps] 406 00:22:48,117 --> 00:22:50,077 - [motorcycle approaching] - Oh, great. 407 00:22:52,246 --> 00:22:54,790 - Excuse me, Officer. - [John coughs] 408 00:22:54,874 --> 00:22:56,082 Would you please roll up the window, please? 409 00:22:56,166 --> 00:22:57,585 There's too much smoke. 410 00:23:00,337 --> 00:23:03,156 Look, I'm gonna take care of you, okay? 411 00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:04,929 Of you and the peanut. 412 00:23:05,013 --> 00:23:06,188 I promised that I would, and I will. 413 00:23:06,272 --> 00:23:08,011 You've been doing a real bang-up job of it so far. 414 00:23:08,095 --> 00:23:10,312 Look, the fire is not my fault, Anna, okay? I didn't set it. 415 00:23:10,396 --> 00:23:12,390 I didn't say you fucking set it, John. 416 00:23:12,474 --> 00:23:14,434 I said we shouldn't have been here in the fucking first place. 417 00:23:14,518 --> 00:23:16,269 Okay, you guys, I'm sorry to interrupt, okay, 418 00:23:16,353 --> 00:23:18,605 but this is, this is not helping, all right? 419 00:23:18,689 --> 00:23:20,500 I know you're scared, 420 00:23:20,584 --> 00:23:23,672 but screaming at each other is just a waste of time, 421 00:23:23,756 --> 00:23:25,612 and it's just... it's just a waste of energy, 422 00:23:25,696 --> 00:23:27,239 and it's gonna dehydrate you. 423 00:23:29,037 --> 00:23:30,663 All right, you're gonna be parents. 424 00:23:31,432 --> 00:23:33,495 You're a team now, you have to remember that. 425 00:23:41,733 --> 00:23:43,172 What does this do? 426 00:23:45,007 --> 00:23:47,176 - [air blowing] - [car chimes] 427 00:23:49,261 --> 00:23:51,888 [sighs] Bingo. 428 00:23:51,972 --> 00:23:53,351 Okay. 429 00:23:53,435 --> 00:23:56,268 [inhales and exhales deeply] 430 00:23:56,352 --> 00:23:58,223 Okay, we can relax. 431 00:24:00,022 --> 00:24:02,044 Just have to wait for this traffic to get moving. 432 00:24:02,128 --> 00:24:04,091 - [siren wailing] - [helicopter blades whirring] 433 00:24:04,175 --> 00:24:06,152 ♪ There's no ♪ 434 00:24:06,236 --> 00:24:10,156 ♪ Saving anything ♪ 435 00:24:10,240 --> 00:24:14,035 ♪ Now we're swallowing the shine of the sun ♪ 436 00:24:14,119 --> 00:24:17,664 ♪ There's no ♪ 437 00:24:17,748 --> 00:24:20,834 ♪ Saving anything ♪ 438 00:24:20,918 --> 00:24:24,296 ♪ How we swallow the sun ♪ 439 00:24:24,380 --> 00:24:28,514 - ♪ But I won't be no runaway... ♪ - _ 440 00:24:28,598 --> 00:24:30,010 [newsman] It's moving incredibly quickly, 441 00:24:30,094 --> 00:24:31,704 and at zero percent contained, 442 00:24:31,788 --> 00:24:34,097 it's still considered a very dangerous situation. 443 00:24:34,181 --> 00:24:36,099 The Santa Ana winds died down last night, 444 00:24:36,183 --> 00:24:38,476 but they're expected to pick back up this afternoon, 445 00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:40,937 which could mean more evacuations in Los Angeles 446 00:24:41,021 --> 00:24:43,849 and Ventura Counties. Now back to you, Molly. 447 00:24:43,933 --> 00:24:44,929 [Molly] Thanks, Charles. 448 00:24:45,013 --> 00:24:47,402 We go now to Suzie Lee, who's live with a member 449 00:24:47,486 --> 00:24:49,446 of our brave Los Angeles Fire Department, 450 00:24:49,530 --> 00:24:52,389 with some advice for people based on recent experience. 451 00:24:52,473 --> 00:24:53,629 Suzie. 452 00:24:53,713 --> 00:24:55,869 Thanks, Molly. I'm here with Dan Foster. 453 00:24:55,953 --> 00:24:58,414 Dan, you've faced this sort of thing before. 454 00:24:58,498 --> 00:25:01,395 What advice would you give people in this situation? 455 00:25:01,479 --> 00:25:03,652 [Dan] Well, these things are unpredictable, uh, 456 00:25:03,736 --> 00:25:05,921 but I guess something my captain told me years ago 457 00:25:06,005 --> 00:25:07,380 has always stayed with me. 458 00:25:07,464 --> 00:25:09,539 He said, in circumstances like these, 459 00:25:09,623 --> 00:25:12,223 "movement is life." If you move, you live. 460 00:25:12,307 --> 00:25:13,386 If you stay, you die. 461 00:25:13,470 --> 00:25:16,056 So if they're telling you to leave, people, leave. 462 00:25:16,140 --> 00:25:18,626 Don't wait, just go. 463 00:25:28,360 --> 00:25:30,362 [slow, somber music] 464 00:25:30,446 --> 00:25:32,531 ♪♪♪ 465 00:25:56,221 --> 00:25:58,348 ♪♪♪ 466 00:26:04,605 --> 00:26:05,689 [grunts] 467 00:26:21,121 --> 00:26:22,202 Fuck. 468 00:26:24,458 --> 00:26:26,634 [line ringing] 469 00:26:26,718 --> 00:26:28,796 [Whitney] Hi, it's Whitney. Leave a message. 470 00:26:34,176 --> 00:26:37,637 [typing] 471 00:26:37,721 --> 00:26:39,639 [pensive music] 472 00:26:39,723 --> 00:26:42,142 ♪♪♪ 473 00:26:58,575 --> 00:27:00,661 ♪♪♪ 474 00:27:15,676 --> 00:27:16,802 [line ringing] 475 00:27:20,828 --> 00:27:22,808 [Whitney] Hi, it's Whitney. Leave a message. 476 00:27:25,602 --> 00:27:27,980 Whit, I, uh... 477 00:27:57,968 --> 00:27:59,887 [helicopter passing outside] 478 00:28:19,904 --> 00:28:22,716 [Jeffries] Why don't you tell me how it began? 479 00:28:22,800 --> 00:28:25,578 [Alison] Oh, it was so long ago, who remembers? 480 00:28:25,662 --> 00:28:28,098 [Jeffries] We're hoping that you do, Ms. Bailey. 481 00:28:29,499 --> 00:28:32,252 [Alison] It all began on a dark and stormy night. 482 00:28:32,336 --> 00:28:34,420 - [chuckles] - Oh, God, no. 483 00:28:34,504 --> 00:28:38,299 I'm kidding. Please... don't write that down. 484 00:28:38,383 --> 00:28:40,885 [Jeffries] Do you remember seeing him for the first time? 485 00:28:40,969 --> 00:28:42,595 [Alison] Yeah. 486 00:28:42,679 --> 00:28:44,768 [Jeffries] Do you remember what you thought? 487 00:28:46,141 --> 00:28:47,976 Ms. Bailey? 488 00:28:48,060 --> 00:28:50,647 [Alison] No, but I remember he was holding his daughter. 489 00:28:50,731 --> 00:28:52,647 [gentle music] 490 00:28:52,731 --> 00:28:54,858 ♪♪♪ 491 00:29:07,280 --> 00:29:09,998 Look, I can't really tell you what I was thinking. 492 00:29:10,690 --> 00:29:13,251 That first year, everything was still such a blur. 493 00:29:13,335 --> 00:29:16,770 But I do remember the sun was really bright, 494 00:29:17,694 --> 00:29:21,384 like, unusually strong for so early in the season. 495 00:29:22,496 --> 00:29:24,086 There was no place to hide. 496 00:29:25,011 --> 00:29:27,932 I liked this one spot by the lighthouse. 497 00:29:28,016 --> 00:29:30,310 The waves out there seemed even angrier than I was. 498 00:29:30,394 --> 00:29:31,979 [stops playback] 499 00:29:40,862 --> 00:29:42,155 [taps key] 500 00:29:42,239 --> 00:29:46,034 [Jeffries] How old were you when it began? 501 00:29:46,118 --> 00:29:47,953 [Alison] I was 31 years old. 502 00:29:49,913 --> 00:29:52,790 I remember promising myself I'd get to 35. 503 00:29:52,874 --> 00:29:55,544 I'd make it through till then. 504 00:29:56,294 --> 00:29:59,131 And if nothing had changed... 505 00:30:00,382 --> 00:30:02,300 ...well, then I had tried hard enough. 506 00:30:02,384 --> 00:30:03,384 - ♪♪♪ - [dialogue inaudible] 507 00:30:03,468 --> 00:30:04,594 [stops playback] 508 00:30:10,851 --> 00:30:12,269 Oh, Alison. 509 00:30:16,106 --> 00:30:17,941 I'm so sorry. 510 00:30:22,988 --> 00:30:24,862 Wish I could go back and... 511 00:30:25,657 --> 00:30:28,368 [slow, somber music] 512 00:30:28,452 --> 00:30:30,579 ♪♪♪ 513 00:30:50,686 --> 00:30:52,475 [Jeffries] Mr. Solloway, hi. 514 00:30:53,769 --> 00:30:54,894 Thanks for coming in. 515 00:30:56,232 --> 00:30:58,294 [Noah] Not like I had much of a choice. 516 00:30:58,378 --> 00:30:59,714 [Jeffries] Well, we'll try not to take up 517 00:30:59,798 --> 00:31:01,366 too much of your time. 518 00:31:02,133 --> 00:31:05,218 So, can you tell us a bit about who you were back then? 519 00:31:06,364 --> 00:31:08,408 Mr. Solloway? 520 00:31:08,492 --> 00:31:10,743 [Noah] Uh, I don't understand the question. 521 00:31:10,827 --> 00:31:13,413 What exactly do you want to know? 522 00:31:13,497 --> 00:31:16,166 [Jeffries] How were you feeling about your life? 523 00:31:17,751 --> 00:31:20,328 [Noah] Fine. Fine. 524 00:31:20,412 --> 00:31:22,515 [Jeffries] Can you say a little more? 525 00:31:23,428 --> 00:31:25,925 [Noah] Great. I was feeling great, you know? 526 00:31:26,009 --> 00:31:28,929 My children were healthy. My wife was beautiful. 527 00:31:31,293 --> 00:31:33,417 My life was pretty fucking perfect. 528 00:31:36,936 --> 00:31:39,648 I-I was a happy man back then. 529 00:31:40,225 --> 00:31:41,649 I... was proud of my family, 530 00:31:41,733 --> 00:31:43,673 my first book had just come out, I... 531 00:31:44,528 --> 00:31:46,529 Everything I'd promised myself I'd achieve 532 00:31:46,613 --> 00:31:49,782 when I was a young man, I... I'd done it. 533 00:31:49,866 --> 00:31:51,451 [Jeffries] But... 534 00:31:51,535 --> 00:31:53,286 [Noah] Well, that's it. There is no "but." 535 00:31:54,454 --> 00:31:57,040 When I look back, I... I can't tell you why it happened. 536 00:32:01,111 --> 00:32:03,739 I was restless, sure, but all men are restless. 537 00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:09,010 But you give up certain personal liberties 538 00:32:09,094 --> 00:32:10,887 to live in a secure state. 539 00:32:10,971 --> 00:32:12,847 On all levels. 540 00:32:12,931 --> 00:32:17,477 National. Municipal. Marital. 541 00:32:17,893 --> 00:32:19,228 I never had any problem with that. 542 00:32:19,312 --> 00:32:20,396 I enjoyed being married. 543 00:32:22,232 --> 00:32:24,096 When other men used to complain about their wives, 544 00:32:24,180 --> 00:32:26,849 I'd just think, "Poor sucker made a bad choice." 545 00:32:31,366 --> 00:32:33,076 - [taps key] - I enjoyed being married. 546 00:32:33,917 --> 00:32:35,953 When other men used to complain about their wives, 547 00:32:36,037 --> 00:32:37,997 I'd just think, "Poor sucker made a bad choice." 548 00:32:38,081 --> 00:32:40,000 [taps key] 549 00:32:49,801 --> 00:32:52,137 [rapid banging on door] 550 00:32:57,809 --> 00:32:59,268 - Hi. - Hey. 551 00:32:59,352 --> 00:33:01,187 I saw your car. I figured you were still here. 552 00:33:01,271 --> 00:33:02,748 I'm sorry, who are you? 553 00:33:02,832 --> 00:33:04,690 Uh, Ned, I'm from next door. 554 00:33:04,774 --> 00:33:07,661 Been there for 50 years and I am not leaving. 555 00:33:07,745 --> 00:33:09,391 That's what I told the sheriff. 556 00:33:11,781 --> 00:33:14,575 Well, I am. I'm leaving right now. 557 00:33:14,659 --> 00:33:17,161 Well, you can't. It's-it's too late. 558 00:33:17,245 --> 00:33:18,496 What? 559 00:33:18,580 --> 00:33:19,872 I just spoke to the sheriff. 560 00:33:19,956 --> 00:33:22,435 The fire is coming down the canyon. 561 00:33:22,519 --> 00:33:24,016 You can't get out. 562 00:33:24,100 --> 00:33:25,461 - Really? - You can't go. 563 00:33:25,545 --> 00:33:27,797 - You got to shelter in place. - What? 564 00:33:27,881 --> 00:33:29,841 Yeah, clean your gutters, 565 00:33:29,925 --> 00:33:32,552 rake your yard, hose down your house, 566 00:33:32,636 --> 00:33:35,388 put wet towels underneath your door, 567 00:33:35,472 --> 00:33:36,681 fill up the bathtub. 568 00:33:36,765 --> 00:33:39,225 And if you've got a basement, well, that's even better. 569 00:33:39,309 --> 00:33:40,768 But you can't go. 570 00:33:40,852 --> 00:33:43,533 Topanga Canyon is completely gridlocked. 571 00:33:45,190 --> 00:33:46,399 How much time do we have? 572 00:33:46,483 --> 00:33:48,651 Uh, m-maybe an hour. 573 00:33:48,735 --> 00:33:50,945 Maybe two hours. 574 00:33:51,029 --> 00:33:52,488 You know, they're-they're trying to move people 575 00:33:52,572 --> 00:33:53,906 into the fire station. 576 00:33:53,990 --> 00:33:56,798 That is a fool's errand if you ask me. 577 00:33:58,198 --> 00:33:59,871 I'm going. Good luck. 578 00:33:59,955 --> 00:34:01,664 Yeah. Nice house. 579 00:34:02,826 --> 00:34:04,542 You can have it. 580 00:34:04,626 --> 00:34:06,085 - [sirens wailing] - [excited chatter] 581 00:34:06,169 --> 00:34:08,171 - [helicopter blades whirring] - [people coughing] 582 00:34:13,885 --> 00:34:15,261 - [coughing] - Stay with them, stay with them. 583 00:34:15,345 --> 00:34:16,846 [dramatic music] 584 00:34:16,930 --> 00:34:19,015 ♪♪♪ 585 00:34:28,191 --> 00:34:29,901 Helen? 586 00:34:31,194 --> 00:34:34,405 - Don't even think about it, fucker! - Ah, fuck. 587 00:34:34,489 --> 00:34:38,159 Okay. Okay, fuck, fine. Fuck you. 588 00:34:44,374 --> 00:34:46,959 [coughing] 589 00:34:47,043 --> 00:34:48,794 Helen. Open the window. 590 00:34:48,878 --> 00:34:51,255 No, there's too much smoke. 591 00:34:51,339 --> 00:34:53,674 - We have to get out of here. - What? 592 00:34:53,758 --> 00:34:54,342 Open up. Come on, get out. 593 00:34:57,554 --> 00:34:58,596 What the fuck, Noah? 594 00:34:58,680 --> 00:35:00,139 The fire's coming. We have to get out of here. 595 00:35:00,223 --> 00:35:01,057 No. They just told us to stay. 596 00:35:01,141 --> 00:35:05,353 - Who did? - Some... this guy. 597 00:35:05,437 --> 00:35:07,146 He said the traffic's starting to move 598 00:35:07,230 --> 00:35:08,564 down at the bottom; we just have to wait a few minutes. 599 00:35:08,648 --> 00:35:11,025 It's not true. The-the fire is an hour away. 600 00:35:11,109 --> 00:35:12,193 We have to get out of here. 601 00:35:12,277 --> 00:35:14,153 Don't worry, look. You see this ridge right here? 602 00:35:14,237 --> 00:35:15,988 I've hiked it before. There's a fire road up here, 603 00:35:16,072 --> 00:35:17,323 it goes all the way down to the ocean. 604 00:35:17,407 --> 00:35:18,366 We just have to get up there. 605 00:35:18,450 --> 00:35:20,493 Okay, what about them? 606 00:35:22,621 --> 00:35:23,829 Who the fuck are they? 607 00:35:23,913 --> 00:35:26,165 I don't... I picked them up. They don't have a car. [coughs] 608 00:35:26,249 --> 00:35:27,375 Okay, well, they'll have to come with us. 609 00:35:27,459 --> 00:35:29,585 - She's pregnant. - Oh, fuck, look, Helen, 610 00:35:29,669 --> 00:35:31,045 I don't know what to say, but we have to go. 611 00:35:31,129 --> 00:35:33,121 Movement is life. If we stay here, 612 00:35:33,205 --> 00:35:34,524 we'll probably fucking die. 613 00:35:36,885 --> 00:35:38,177 Fuck. 614 00:35:38,261 --> 00:35:41,181 [man] Forget the car, we got to go. 615 00:35:42,932 --> 00:35:44,768 [coughing] 616 00:35:46,269 --> 00:35:47,771 Ah, fuck. 617 00:35:51,024 --> 00:35:54,485 - They coming? - No. Now what? 618 00:35:54,569 --> 00:35:56,237 Here. 619 00:35:56,321 --> 00:35:57,697 [coughs] 620 00:35:57,781 --> 00:35:59,908 Take this. Follow me. 621 00:36:04,535 --> 00:36:05,878 - [horns honking] - [helicopter blades whirring] 622 00:36:05,962 --> 00:36:09,869 _ 623 00:36:11,378 --> 00:36:15,172 Okay, we need to get down there, cross the ravine, 624 00:36:15,256 --> 00:36:16,549 - and hike up the other side. - That's miles. 625 00:36:16,633 --> 00:36:17,676 It's not, it's okay. We can do it. 626 00:36:19,636 --> 00:36:21,443 - No. No way. - Helen, 627 00:36:21,527 --> 00:36:25,391 I know you're scared, but you got to trust me. 628 00:36:25,475 --> 00:36:28,895 [helicopter passing] 629 00:36:34,025 --> 00:36:35,235 Shit. 630 00:36:39,447 --> 00:36:41,116 [horns honking] 631 00:36:42,826 --> 00:36:44,994 All right? 632 00:36:45,078 --> 00:36:47,079 [contemplative music] 633 00:36:47,163 --> 00:36:49,249 ♪♪♪ 634 00:36:53,294 --> 00:36:54,421 [helicopter passing] 635 00:37:17,736 --> 00:37:19,863 ♪♪♪ 636 00:37:42,601 --> 00:37:44,664 [Helen] Is this how we're gonna die? 637 00:37:44,748 --> 00:37:46,806 Probably not. 638 00:37:46,890 --> 00:37:48,533 [sighs] 639 00:37:49,539 --> 00:37:51,852 Jesus, I don't want to die. 640 00:37:51,936 --> 00:37:54,606 Neither do I, so let's just keep going. 641 00:37:58,433 --> 00:38:00,820 [Helen] You seemed pretty resigned to it three hours ago. 642 00:38:01,703 --> 00:38:03,084 Yeah, I guess I was. 643 00:38:04,073 --> 00:38:05,533 And? 644 00:38:07,503 --> 00:38:08,671 Why, you disappointed? 645 00:38:11,120 --> 00:38:12,330 What happened? 646 00:38:13,458 --> 00:38:15,251 Ah, you'll think I'm nuts. 647 00:38:15,335 --> 00:38:16,419 Try me. 648 00:38:16,503 --> 00:38:18,170 I listened to the recordings 649 00:38:18,254 --> 00:38:21,007 of the depositions that Alison and I gave to Jeffries. 650 00:38:22,242 --> 00:38:23,702 Yeah? 651 00:38:24,803 --> 00:38:26,336 I don't know, it was... 652 00:38:26,420 --> 00:38:28,556 It was just hearing my own voice from back then, 653 00:38:28,640 --> 00:38:31,726 it reminded me of something I used to know. 654 00:38:32,263 --> 00:38:33,433 What? 655 00:38:35,930 --> 00:38:37,423 How to be happy. 656 00:38:43,398 --> 00:38:44,733 Eh, you think I'm crazy. 657 00:38:55,750 --> 00:38:57,710 I keep thinking about what Whitney said, 658 00:38:57,794 --> 00:39:01,585 that her worst fear is really turning into me. 659 00:39:01,669 --> 00:39:03,841 She was upset. She didn't mean it. 660 00:39:03,925 --> 00:39:05,760 No, she absolutely meant it. 661 00:39:06,511 --> 00:39:08,288 Said I was codependent. 662 00:39:08,972 --> 00:39:11,724 If Whitney turns out anything like you, 663 00:39:12,448 --> 00:39:15,394 she should count herself fucking lucky. 664 00:39:16,437 --> 00:39:17,901 I don't know, maybe she's right. 665 00:39:17,985 --> 00:39:22,097 Maybe I am a pathetic, desperate enabler. 666 00:39:22,181 --> 00:39:24,195 I've never been able to stand on my own two feet. 667 00:39:25,806 --> 00:39:26,973 You're not. 668 00:39:31,035 --> 00:39:32,411 Well, thank you, but I'm not sure 669 00:39:32,495 --> 00:39:33,871 I can trust your opinion. 670 00:39:33,955 --> 00:39:36,175 Well, what about what she said about me? 671 00:39:36,795 --> 00:39:38,501 What'd she say? 672 00:39:38,585 --> 00:39:39,992 That I burn through people, 673 00:39:40,076 --> 00:39:43,714 that I use them up and discard them. 674 00:39:43,798 --> 00:39:45,563 Think she's right about that? 675 00:39:46,175 --> 00:39:48,219 You want the truth? 676 00:39:49,429 --> 00:39:50,971 Yeah, I know. 677 00:39:51,055 --> 00:39:52,681 - You do? - Yeah, of course I do. 678 00:39:52,765 --> 00:39:54,350 Well, why do you do it? 679 00:39:55,935 --> 00:39:57,644 Wish I knew. 680 00:39:58,308 --> 00:40:01,106 I always thought it was because you were so deeply insecure, 681 00:40:01,190 --> 00:40:03,275 you were afraid if you stayed with someone long enough, 682 00:40:03,359 --> 00:40:05,653 they'd find out how inadequate you are. 683 00:40:05,737 --> 00:40:07,154 Thanks. 684 00:40:07,238 --> 00:40:09,240 I know it sounds harsh, but we're basically 685 00:40:09,324 --> 00:40:10,616 flirting with death here, right? 686 00:40:10,700 --> 00:40:11,617 Oh, fuck. 687 00:40:11,701 --> 00:40:12,868 I mean, I might not get another chance to... 688 00:40:12,952 --> 00:40:14,537 Helen, wait. 689 00:40:18,499 --> 00:40:19,542 Oh, shit. 690 00:40:28,301 --> 00:40:29,802 I guess we climb down. 691 00:40:29,886 --> 00:40:31,011 Oh, my God. 692 00:40:31,095 --> 00:40:32,471 [suspenseful music] 693 00:40:32,555 --> 00:40:35,307 We can't hike back. That's not an option. 694 00:40:35,391 --> 00:40:36,517 Yeah, but I can't climb down that. 695 00:40:36,601 --> 00:40:39,562 - I mean, I ca... I can't. - It's not that far. 696 00:40:44,400 --> 00:40:45,526 Oh, God. 697 00:40:51,741 --> 00:40:54,785 Okay... okay, look. 698 00:40:54,869 --> 00:40:55,995 How about I go first 699 00:40:56,079 --> 00:40:57,746 - and find a way down? - No. 700 00:40:57,830 --> 00:40:59,707 And then, if I fall, at least the kids'll have you. 701 00:40:59,791 --> 00:41:00,978 - Oh, my God, no! Wait. - No, no, but if I make it... 702 00:41:01,062 --> 00:41:02,668 - What?! We'll just wait. - I'll make it. 703 00:41:02,752 --> 00:41:04,879 I'll make it, okay? And I'll guide you down. 704 00:41:04,963 --> 00:41:07,047 And then, if you fall, I'll catch you. 705 00:41:07,131 --> 00:41:08,507 [laughs] I'll crush you. 706 00:41:08,591 --> 00:41:09,925 - That's insane. - You're okay. 707 00:41:10,009 --> 00:41:11,153 I mean, it's idiotic. It's just, 708 00:41:11,237 --> 00:41:12,845 there's got to be another way out of here 709 00:41:12,929 --> 00:41:14,019 if we just hike back to... 710 00:41:14,103 --> 00:41:15,681 Oh, my God, Noah! 711 00:41:15,765 --> 00:41:17,474 Shit. Just follow me. 712 00:41:17,558 --> 00:41:19,894 Noah! Noah! 713 00:41:19,978 --> 00:41:20,978 [dramatic music] 714 00:41:21,062 --> 00:41:23,898 ♪♪♪ 715 00:41:37,120 --> 00:41:39,247 [breathing heavily] 716 00:41:44,961 --> 00:41:47,546 [exciting, suspenseful music] 717 00:41:47,630 --> 00:41:50,466 ♪♪♪ 718 00:42:14,073 --> 00:42:15,658 Noah! 719 00:42:15,742 --> 00:42:17,952 I'm okay. I'm okay. 720 00:42:26,794 --> 00:42:28,629 [straining] 721 00:42:36,247 --> 00:42:37,790 Okay, your turn. 722 00:42:40,266 --> 00:42:42,185 Helen? 723 00:42:44,229 --> 00:42:46,480 Come on, you can do this. 724 00:42:46,564 --> 00:42:47,982 No, I'm good. 725 00:42:48,066 --> 00:42:51,986 You should just go get help, and come back and get me. 726 00:42:53,446 --> 00:42:56,782 Helen, y-you can't just sit there. Tha-That's not an option. 727 00:42:56,866 --> 00:42:58,363 I think it is. 728 00:42:58,447 --> 00:43:00,285 You have to trust me. 729 00:43:00,369 --> 00:43:02,371 [scoffs] Why would I trust you? 730 00:43:02,455 --> 00:43:05,750 Every time I trust you, something terrible happens. 731 00:43:12,799 --> 00:43:14,591 Helen, please. 732 00:43:15,472 --> 00:43:18,137 The kids, the kids need you. 733 00:43:19,042 --> 00:43:20,598 I need you. 734 00:43:22,058 --> 00:43:24,310 We can't do this without you. 735 00:43:25,394 --> 00:43:27,522 Please come down. 736 00:43:30,566 --> 00:43:32,693 Oh, fuck. 737 00:43:37,448 --> 00:43:39,992 Okay, that's great! That's great. 738 00:43:40,076 --> 00:43:42,995 [chuckles] You got it. 739 00:43:43,079 --> 00:43:44,997 [slow, suspenseful music] 740 00:43:45,081 --> 00:43:47,416 ♪♪♪ 741 00:43:51,671 --> 00:43:53,210 Go on, that's it. 742 00:43:53,294 --> 00:43:54,757 You got it. 743 00:44:08,896 --> 00:44:12,357 That's it. You got it, you got it. 744 00:44:12,441 --> 00:44:14,818 Okay, there's a hold just a few inches down. 745 00:44:14,902 --> 00:44:16,946 Test it first. 746 00:44:17,030 --> 00:44:19,238 - Oh, my God. - Ah, fuck! 747 00:44:19,322 --> 00:44:20,524 Oh, are you okay? 748 00:44:22,869 --> 00:44:24,036 Yeah, I'm fine. 749 00:44:25,992 --> 00:44:27,361 I'm stuck. 750 00:44:27,445 --> 00:44:28,748 No, you're not. 751 00:44:28,832 --> 00:44:31,877 There's a foothold just below the one you just tested. 752 00:44:31,961 --> 00:44:33,880 [breathing heavily] 753 00:44:39,802 --> 00:44:41,762 Ugh. I can't reach it. 754 00:44:41,846 --> 00:44:44,306 Yes, you can, but you have to let go of your right hand 755 00:44:44,390 --> 00:44:45,307 and bend your knee. 756 00:44:45,391 --> 00:44:47,059 Where's this foot? 757 00:44:47,143 --> 00:44:48,769 Shit, okay. 758 00:44:52,273 --> 00:44:54,900 That's it. 759 00:44:54,984 --> 00:44:56,902 It's just, like... it's, like, two inches below 760 00:44:56,986 --> 00:44:57,904 where you want it to be. 761 00:45:00,789 --> 00:45:03,700 Helen, y-you can't just freeze. You have to keep going. 762 00:45:03,784 --> 00:45:05,410 Movement is life. 763 00:45:05,494 --> 00:45:08,288 You know what? Could you please fucking stop 764 00:45:08,372 --> 00:45:09,414 mansplaining to me right now?! 765 00:45:09,498 --> 00:45:11,281 I'm not mansplaining. 766 00:45:11,365 --> 00:45:12,793 I'm... 767 00:45:12,877 --> 00:45:14,211 I'm... Look, you're hanging from a fucking rock face 768 00:45:14,295 --> 00:45:15,489 and you might die. 769 00:45:15,573 --> 00:45:17,089 I-I'm just trying to help. 770 00:45:17,173 --> 00:45:18,841 I am not gonna fucking die, and the only reason 771 00:45:18,925 --> 00:45:21,426 I'm hanging from a rock face is because of you. 772 00:45:21,510 --> 00:45:23,095 Because you don't plan. 773 00:45:23,179 --> 00:45:24,263 You don't think ahead. 774 00:45:24,347 --> 00:45:26,640 You just do what you want, and you don't think about 775 00:45:26,724 --> 00:45:28,642 the consequences. 776 00:45:28,726 --> 00:45:29,969 I don't think that's fair. 777 00:45:30,053 --> 00:45:31,532 And another thing. 778 00:45:32,343 --> 00:45:35,774 What the fuck is up with this "movement is life" bullshit? 779 00:45:35,858 --> 00:45:38,028 That is just something that men say. 780 00:45:38,112 --> 00:45:39,444 Oh. 781 00:45:40,099 --> 00:45:41,989 "I couldn't stay with my wife. 782 00:45:42,073 --> 00:45:44,783 I had to leave my family because... 783 00:45:44,867 --> 00:45:46,535 'movement is life.'" 784 00:45:46,619 --> 00:45:49,246 It's such self-serving hogwash. 785 00:45:49,330 --> 00:45:51,248 [panting] 786 00:45:51,332 --> 00:45:55,127 [laughs] 787 00:45:55,211 --> 00:45:56,295 Ooh. 788 00:45:56,379 --> 00:45:58,297 [laughing] Oh, my God. 789 00:45:58,381 --> 00:46:00,215 - [exhales] Ooh. - [chuckles] 790 00:46:00,299 --> 00:46:01,967 Nice work. 791 00:46:02,051 --> 00:46:04,512 You can hit me if you want to. 792 00:46:07,890 --> 00:46:10,142 [chuckles] 793 00:46:10,226 --> 00:46:12,811 [laughs] 794 00:46:12,895 --> 00:46:13,980 Helen. 795 00:46:15,898 --> 00:46:17,941 Look. 796 00:46:18,025 --> 00:46:19,234 - [Helen] Oh, my God. - [chuckles] 797 00:46:19,318 --> 00:46:21,345 We did it. 798 00:46:22,071 --> 00:46:23,948 Come on. Let's go. 799 00:46:27,243 --> 00:46:28,410 Is that the ravine? 800 00:46:28,494 --> 00:46:30,078 [Noah] Yeah. 801 00:46:30,162 --> 00:46:32,957 Now we just have to go all the way back up. 802 00:46:36,522 --> 00:46:38,253 So we were gonna have a buffet 'cause it's cheaper, 803 00:46:38,337 --> 00:46:40,214 but it's gonna be impossible to keep the food warm 804 00:46:40,298 --> 00:46:42,841 - in those weather conditions. - [Helen] Isn't the tent heated? 805 00:46:42,925 --> 00:46:45,533 Yeah, but it's probably gonna be below freezing, 806 00:46:45,617 --> 00:46:47,387 so I think maybe we should just get 'em to plate it 807 00:46:47,471 --> 00:46:50,849 and then cancel the steak. 808 00:46:50,933 --> 00:46:53,728 Half their friends are vegan anyway. 809 00:46:55,980 --> 00:46:57,768 I can't believe you did all that. 810 00:46:57,852 --> 00:46:59,835 - [chuckles] What? - You planned the whole wedding. 811 00:46:59,919 --> 00:47:02,248 You want to know a secret? 812 00:47:02,332 --> 00:47:04,447 - I really enjoyed it. - [both laugh] 813 00:47:07,325 --> 00:47:09,372 I'll talk to her. I'll get her to change her mind. 814 00:47:09,456 --> 00:47:11,245 No, no, don't, don't. 815 00:47:11,329 --> 00:47:13,372 Don't. It's what she wants, and I don't want to... 816 00:47:13,456 --> 00:47:15,082 Just-just let it be. 817 00:47:19,295 --> 00:47:20,879 [exhales] 818 00:47:20,963 --> 00:47:23,882 Can I ask you something I don't understand? 819 00:47:23,966 --> 00:47:25,717 Of course. 820 00:47:26,719 --> 00:47:29,480 I don't understand how you can be so compassionate sometimes 821 00:47:29,564 --> 00:47:32,683 and sometimes so... cruel. 822 00:47:34,852 --> 00:47:37,586 I mean, we all have our darkness and our bad qualities, 823 00:47:37,670 --> 00:47:39,674 but-but with you, the... 824 00:47:41,342 --> 00:47:43,110 Dichotomy is extreme? 825 00:47:44,737 --> 00:47:45,821 Yes. 826 00:47:48,160 --> 00:47:50,601 Yeah, I've asked myself the same question. 827 00:47:52,025 --> 00:47:54,511 I don't know, I thought about my childhood. 828 00:47:55,702 --> 00:47:57,708 My mother was always dying and my father was never there, 829 00:47:57,792 --> 00:47:59,751 and when he was, he was so angry... 830 00:48:01,087 --> 00:48:03,255 I just wanted to be somewhere else. 831 00:48:03,339 --> 00:48:06,008 Someone else. And then... 832 00:48:07,330 --> 00:48:08,612 and then I got to college 833 00:48:08,696 --> 00:48:11,346 and I met you, and, and you looked at me with fresh eyes 834 00:48:11,430 --> 00:48:14,790 and you told me how much potential I had 835 00:48:14,874 --> 00:48:16,977 and that I was gonna be this great artist. 836 00:48:17,061 --> 00:48:20,731 I remember thinking to myself... I actually said to myself... 837 00:48:20,815 --> 00:48:22,357 "Don't get caught. 838 00:48:22,441 --> 00:48:24,992 Don't let her see the cracks, and you'll be okay." 839 00:48:26,012 --> 00:48:28,238 - Really? - Yeah. Really. 840 00:48:28,322 --> 00:48:29,781 And I'm sorry, I... 841 00:48:29,865 --> 00:48:31,950 That's no way to begin a relationship, but... 842 00:48:32,034 --> 00:48:34,369 I know that now. 843 00:48:34,453 --> 00:48:37,016 You can't lie your way through a marriage, 844 00:48:37,100 --> 00:48:38,373 hiding from the one person who knows you better 845 00:48:38,457 --> 00:48:40,925 than anyone else and resenting her 846 00:48:41,009 --> 00:48:42,345 when she starts to figure it out. 847 00:48:42,429 --> 00:48:44,755 And then hating her for loving you anyway. 848 00:48:45,695 --> 00:48:47,132 Because what kind of an idiot must she be 849 00:48:47,216 --> 00:48:50,010 if she can't see what a loser you really are? 850 00:48:52,677 --> 00:48:54,217 That's what I did to you, and... 851 00:48:54,850 --> 00:48:57,226 I put my self-hatred onto you. 852 00:48:59,990 --> 00:49:02,320 And I'm really fucking sorry. 853 00:49:10,406 --> 00:49:12,289 I was lying, too. 854 00:49:12,373 --> 00:49:14,493 No, you weren't. You're the most honest person I know. 855 00:49:14,577 --> 00:49:16,578 No, I was. 856 00:49:16,662 --> 00:49:21,564 I mean, I tried to make you think I was this cool girl, 857 00:49:21,648 --> 00:49:23,144 this cool, easygoing person. 858 00:49:23,228 --> 00:49:24,464 [laughs] You... 859 00:49:24,548 --> 00:49:26,463 - You were never easygoing. - Well... 860 00:49:26,547 --> 00:49:29,830 [laughs] You know, you know what I mean. 861 00:49:29,914 --> 00:49:30,967 Independent. 862 00:49:31,051 --> 00:49:34,846 You know... autonomous. 863 00:49:34,930 --> 00:49:37,135 - You sure had me convinced. - I know I did. 864 00:49:38,075 --> 00:49:40,685 But I wasn't... [stammers] 865 00:49:40,769 --> 00:49:42,479 I really wasn't even a person then. 866 00:49:42,563 --> 00:49:45,315 I was like a-a performance of a person. 867 00:49:45,399 --> 00:49:47,484 And all I really wanted 868 00:49:47,568 --> 00:49:52,573 was someone to save me from Bruce and Margaret. 869 00:49:54,450 --> 00:49:59,681 And then what I did to you was so unfair 870 00:49:59,765 --> 00:50:02,457 because I, I-I brought you into my family 871 00:50:02,541 --> 00:50:05,157 with the promise of all of this opportunity, 872 00:50:05,241 --> 00:50:07,087 and I knew my dad would be threatened by you. 873 00:50:07,171 --> 00:50:09,506 And then I just set you up to be the obstacle. 874 00:50:09,590 --> 00:50:13,176 Like, to just take the heat, fight the fights. 875 00:50:13,260 --> 00:50:16,179 I mean, I never stood up for you against them. 876 00:50:16,263 --> 00:50:18,182 I said I did, but I didn't. 877 00:50:19,683 --> 00:50:22,811 No, you didn't. 878 00:50:24,431 --> 00:50:26,415 So I'm sorry, too. 879 00:50:31,529 --> 00:50:33,232 [laughs softly] 880 00:50:34,428 --> 00:50:35,999 Well, okay. 881 00:50:41,163 --> 00:50:42,969 [Helen] Can I ask you another question? 882 00:50:43,053 --> 00:50:44,374 Anything. 883 00:50:44,458 --> 00:50:47,085 If you had never met Alison, 884 00:50:48,035 --> 00:50:50,839 if we had stayed in the city and not gone 885 00:50:50,923 --> 00:50:53,057 to my parents' house that summer like you wanted to, 886 00:50:53,141 --> 00:50:55,327 do you think we would still be together? 887 00:50:56,745 --> 00:50:59,206 I mean, would I ever have been enough for you? 888 00:51:01,892 --> 00:51:03,518 Which answer do you want? 889 00:51:04,462 --> 00:51:05,546 The truth. 890 00:51:08,190 --> 00:51:11,318 It was me who wasn't enough. It wasn't you. 891 00:51:11,402 --> 00:51:13,695 I said to Jeffries I had no idea why it happened, 892 00:51:13,779 --> 00:51:15,405 but that's not true. 893 00:51:15,489 --> 00:51:19,951 I just felt so bad about myself back then. 894 00:51:20,035 --> 00:51:22,606 I'd been writing that first book for what? 895 00:51:22,690 --> 00:51:25,165 Seven years? Eight years? 896 00:51:25,249 --> 00:51:27,626 And then, when it came out, nobody read it. 897 00:51:27,710 --> 00:51:31,213 I thought I'd never get from under the thumb of your father. 898 00:51:32,631 --> 00:51:34,966 Everything I touched turned mediocre. 899 00:51:35,756 --> 00:51:37,507 I wanted to be noticed by someone. 900 00:51:38,227 --> 00:51:40,562 Make an impact. Be a hero. 901 00:51:42,081 --> 00:51:43,642 Then along came this girl who... 902 00:51:44,274 --> 00:51:45,936 she seemed desperate to be saved. 903 00:51:48,522 --> 00:51:51,525 It was more than that. You loved her. 904 00:51:52,385 --> 00:51:55,211 Plenty of people fall in love outside their marriage. 905 00:51:55,295 --> 00:51:56,863 Not everybody leaves. 906 00:51:56,947 --> 00:51:58,735 [slow, somber music] 907 00:51:58,819 --> 00:52:00,979 No, you're right. I did love her. 908 00:52:01,063 --> 00:52:04,163 I was crazy about her, but that's not why I left. 909 00:52:06,332 --> 00:52:08,218 I was afraid I was gonna die 910 00:52:09,084 --> 00:52:11,445 without ever having done anything in my life. 911 00:52:12,780 --> 00:52:15,466 Now I've done plenty; it turns out I'm gonna die anyway. 912 00:52:17,259 --> 00:52:18,869 Not today. 913 00:52:19,703 --> 00:52:20,929 No. 914 00:52:21,013 --> 00:52:22,414 Not today. 915 00:52:24,141 --> 00:52:26,143 - Can I have some water? - Yeah. 916 00:52:27,920 --> 00:52:30,147 I think that's the fire road there. 917 00:52:31,940 --> 00:52:33,359 I think we're gonna be okay. 918 00:52:37,071 --> 00:52:39,614 Can I ask you something now? 919 00:52:39,698 --> 00:52:41,149 Seems fair enough. 920 00:52:44,186 --> 00:52:46,246 What was it like for you? 921 00:52:46,330 --> 00:52:47,335 What? 922 00:52:48,028 --> 00:52:49,207 My affair. 923 00:52:49,650 --> 00:52:51,276 The divorce. 924 00:52:52,247 --> 00:52:54,266 I've never really asked you. 925 00:52:57,752 --> 00:52:59,660 Well, it was fucking awful. 926 00:53:03,732 --> 00:53:04,901 Tell me. 927 00:53:04,985 --> 00:53:07,225 I couldn't take a deep breath for two years. 928 00:53:07,309 --> 00:53:10,877 I cried everywhere. 929 00:53:10,961 --> 00:53:14,030 Cried in my car, cried on a run, cried in the shower. 930 00:53:14,114 --> 00:53:16,401 The minute I was alone for two seconds, I cried. 931 00:53:16,485 --> 00:53:17,735 I couldn't sleep. 932 00:53:18,773 --> 00:53:20,947 I was afraid to be alone in the house with the kids. 933 00:53:21,031 --> 00:53:22,533 I was afraid... 934 00:53:23,701 --> 00:53:26,115 what might happen if something happened to one of them, 935 00:53:26,199 --> 00:53:28,414 that I wouldn't be able to handle it on my own. 936 00:53:29,705 --> 00:53:31,737 Some of our friends were awful. 937 00:53:31,821 --> 00:53:33,793 You know, the people who loved us together, 938 00:53:33,877 --> 00:53:35,754 said I shouldn't let you go so easily, 939 00:53:35,838 --> 00:53:38,217 that I should fight for you more, as if... 940 00:53:38,301 --> 00:53:41,168 [chuckles] I had any choice in the matter. 941 00:53:42,621 --> 00:53:44,468 As if it was my decision. 942 00:53:46,765 --> 00:53:48,933 And then later, when I had to see you with her 943 00:53:49,017 --> 00:53:51,019 and compare myself to her, and I... 944 00:53:53,313 --> 00:53:56,967 I, uh, I u... I used to think I looked good. 945 00:53:58,177 --> 00:53:59,345 You know. 946 00:54:00,387 --> 00:54:02,220 And then, suddenly, I just couldn't look at myself 947 00:54:02,304 --> 00:54:04,353 in the mirror anymore 'cause all I saw was my wrinkles 948 00:54:04,437 --> 00:54:09,120 and my stomach after having had four kids and... 949 00:54:09,204 --> 00:54:10,800 I would just think, 950 00:54:11,897 --> 00:54:15,148 "How could you not know how ugly you are? 951 00:54:15,672 --> 00:54:17,181 Of course he left you." 952 00:54:17,959 --> 00:54:19,085 Oh, Helen... 953 00:54:19,169 --> 00:54:20,465 Don't pity me. 954 00:54:20,549 --> 00:54:22,175 I wasn't. I'm not. I'm... 955 00:54:22,259 --> 00:54:24,803 You asked me what it was like. That's what it was like. 956 00:54:25,973 --> 00:54:27,441 I got through it. 957 00:54:29,528 --> 00:54:31,309 I made it through and I'm more proud of that 958 00:54:31,393 --> 00:54:32,811 than anything I've ever done in my life, 959 00:54:32,895 --> 00:54:35,122 so please don't fucking pity me. 960 00:54:35,206 --> 00:54:36,857 I wasn't pitying you. 961 00:54:45,384 --> 00:54:46,991 You know, the one, the one thing 962 00:54:47,075 --> 00:54:48,660 that still gets me, really, it's just that I-I... 963 00:54:48,744 --> 00:54:51,427 I used to think, when we had no money and we had all these kids, 964 00:54:51,511 --> 00:54:53,081 and we were fighting, I would look at you sometimes 965 00:54:53,165 --> 00:54:55,834 and I would think, "One day, this is gonna be worth it. 966 00:54:57,461 --> 00:55:01,673 One day, I'm gonna dance with him at Whitney's wedding. 967 00:55:01,757 --> 00:55:05,385 A-And we will have built..." 968 00:55:06,345 --> 00:55:09,289 "...an amazing thing together. 969 00:55:10,641 --> 00:55:11,917 Family." 970 00:55:15,113 --> 00:55:17,032 That's the thing that still hurts, if you want 971 00:55:17,116 --> 00:55:18,982 to know the truth, that you just left during the hard parts, 972 00:55:19,066 --> 00:55:21,527 and we never had a chance to celebrate. 973 00:55:33,226 --> 00:55:34,748 We made it. 974 00:55:35,426 --> 00:55:36,875 [panting] Can I sit... 975 00:55:36,959 --> 00:55:38,708 Can we sit down for a minute? 976 00:55:38,792 --> 00:55:40,629 Sure. 977 00:55:50,030 --> 00:55:52,015 Yeah, it looks like the road goes for about another mile, 978 00:55:52,099 --> 00:55:53,991 then it hits civilization. 979 00:56:00,983 --> 00:56:03,068 [snake rattling] 980 00:56:06,613 --> 00:56:08,532 Noah? 981 00:56:09,866 --> 00:56:12,368 Noah? 982 00:56:12,452 --> 00:56:13,703 [shouts] 983 00:56:13,787 --> 00:56:15,830 - Noah! Aah! - Fuck. 984 00:56:15,914 --> 00:56:17,081 Oh, fuck. 985 00:56:17,165 --> 00:56:20,768 Oh, no, this is bad. 986 00:56:20,852 --> 00:56:22,170 - Shit. Did it get you? - It's, like, really, really, 987 00:56:22,254 --> 00:56:23,781 - really bad. Yes. - Oh, fuck. 988 00:56:23,865 --> 00:56:25,423 You're gonna be okay. You're gonna be okay. 989 00:56:25,507 --> 00:56:27,217 - It's all right. - I can't believe 990 00:56:27,301 --> 00:56:29,219 we hiked out of that fire and I'm gonna die anyway. 991 00:56:29,303 --> 00:56:30,887 I can't get a signal. 992 00:56:30,971 --> 00:56:32,765 We're gonna get you to the hospital. 993 00:56:32,849 --> 00:56:34,557 No shit. 994 00:56:34,641 --> 00:56:36,392 - [screams] - No, stop! You got to stop. 995 00:56:36,476 --> 00:56:38,291 - Sit down. - Why? I can walk. 996 00:56:38,375 --> 00:56:39,741 You can't! You have to be still! 997 00:56:39,825 --> 00:56:42,016 - Why? - Because the more you move, 998 00:56:42,100 --> 00:56:43,976 the quicker the venom will get to your heart. 999 00:56:44,060 --> 00:56:44,943 Oh, my God. 1000 00:56:45,027 --> 00:56:47,255 - Oh, my God. Oh, my God. - [Noah] Just be calm! 1001 00:56:47,339 --> 00:56:48,530 How? 1002 00:56:48,614 --> 00:56:50,790 Just fucking calm. 1003 00:56:51,707 --> 00:56:52,825 Here, I got you. 1004 00:56:52,909 --> 00:56:54,578 Here, come here. 1005 00:56:56,496 --> 00:56:58,063 You be calm. 1006 00:56:58,147 --> 00:57:00,500 Come on. 1007 00:57:00,584 --> 00:57:03,419 [slow, suspenseful music] 1008 00:57:03,503 --> 00:57:05,421 [panting] 1009 00:57:05,505 --> 00:57:08,383 ♪♪♪ 1010 00:57:09,343 --> 00:57:11,010 Stay awake. 1011 00:57:11,094 --> 00:57:14,765 Come on. Come on. 1012 00:57:19,353 --> 00:57:20,770 [grunts] 1013 00:57:20,854 --> 00:57:23,648 You're okay. Just... 1014 00:57:23,732 --> 00:57:26,526 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. 1015 00:57:30,280 --> 00:57:32,824 Help! I need help! Hey. 1016 00:57:32,908 --> 00:57:34,075 Someone needs to see us immediately. 1017 00:57:34,159 --> 00:57:34,993 You need to fill out these forms. 1018 00:57:35,077 --> 00:57:36,494 The triage nurse will be right with you. 1019 00:57:36,578 --> 00:57:37,662 No, uh, she... 1020 00:57:37,746 --> 00:57:38,746 Hey, she needs to see a doctor. 1021 00:57:38,830 --> 00:57:42,333 We need a gurney here now. Tell me what happened. 1022 00:57:42,417 --> 00:57:44,252 Uh, I saw the snake myself. It was a rattlesnake. 1023 00:57:44,336 --> 00:57:45,587 - I know it is. - Let's get her back. 1024 00:57:45,671 --> 00:57:47,880 [indistinct chatter] 1025 00:57:47,964 --> 00:57:49,340 You're okay. You're okay. 1026 00:57:49,424 --> 00:57:51,050 You're in the hospital now. You're okay. 1027 00:57:51,134 --> 00:57:52,176 - Let's move. - Let's go. 1028 00:57:52,260 --> 00:57:53,803 Sir, you need to go back to reception 1029 00:57:53,887 --> 00:57:55,460 and give them her information. 1030 00:57:55,544 --> 00:57:57,056 But I'm... 1031 00:57:57,140 --> 00:57:59,684 [doors close] 1032 00:57:59,768 --> 00:58:01,728 [exhales] 1033 00:58:04,509 --> 00:58:08,535 _ 1034 00:58:09,444 --> 00:58:11,822 - Just fill this out. - Thank you. 1035 00:58:19,701 --> 00:58:21,078 Mr. Solloway? 1036 00:58:23,583 --> 00:58:27,093 We've got her on some intense pain medication so she can rest. 1037 00:58:27,177 --> 00:58:28,254 And we'll continue to monitor her overnight 1038 00:58:28,338 --> 00:58:30,882 to see how her body reacts to the antivenom, 1039 00:58:30,966 --> 00:58:32,676 but for now... 1040 00:58:34,720 --> 00:58:36,614 ...yeah, her vitals look good. 1041 00:58:37,198 --> 00:58:38,849 She's stable. 1042 00:58:40,037 --> 00:58:41,998 That's great. Thank you. 1043 00:58:42,082 --> 00:58:43,186 Can I get you anything? 1044 00:58:43,270 --> 00:58:45,312 - No, I'm fine. Thank you. - Okay, the nurse will be by 1045 00:58:45,396 --> 00:58:46,564 to check on you guys in an hour. 1046 00:58:46,648 --> 00:58:48,525 Thank you. 1047 00:58:59,077 --> 00:59:00,282 [grunts] 1048 00:59:06,710 --> 00:59:07,585 [exhales] 1049 00:59:07,669 --> 00:59:10,922 [man over P. A.] Dr. Davis, call 4799. 1050 00:59:11,006 --> 00:59:13,925 Dr. Davis, call 4799. 1051 00:59:21,725 --> 00:59:24,769 [newswoman] As flames engulfed Topanga Canyon 1052 00:59:24,853 --> 00:59:27,605 earlier this evening, residents were stuck 1053 00:59:27,689 --> 00:59:30,274 in bumper-to-bumper traffic trying to evacuate. 1054 00:59:30,358 --> 00:59:32,777 Though no numbers have yet been reported, 1055 00:59:32,861 --> 00:59:35,613 as many as a hundred people are thought to have perished 1056 00:59:35,697 --> 00:59:37,782 waiting in their cars. Fire Chief Reynolds says 1057 00:59:37,866 --> 00:59:39,575 - the blaze just came through... - Oh, my God. 1058 00:59:39,659 --> 00:59:40,618 ...so quickly, 1059 00:59:40,702 --> 00:59:43,095 there was no time to get them to safety. 1060 00:59:43,179 --> 00:59:45,623 Sheriff's deputies have cordoned off the area 1061 00:59:45,707 --> 00:59:47,125 - and residents are not allowed - [inhales] 1062 00:59:47,209 --> 00:59:49,211 - To return until the... - [turns off TV] 1063 00:59:58,136 --> 01:00:01,556 [inhales] 1064 01:00:01,640 --> 01:00:03,558 ♪ I close my eyes ♪ 1065 01:00:03,642 --> 01:00:06,853 ♪ And listen to hear ♪ 1066 01:00:06,937 --> 01:00:08,274 Hi, friend. 1067 01:00:08,358 --> 01:00:09,731 ♪ The corn come out ♪ 1068 01:00:12,936 --> 01:00:14,360 Hi, friend. 1069 01:00:14,444 --> 01:00:16,738 ♪ And to the stars ♪ 1070 01:00:16,822 --> 01:00:19,241 ♪ You've led us on ♪ 1071 01:00:21,409 --> 01:00:27,123 ♪ Left me looking up ♪ 1072 01:00:27,207 --> 01:00:30,334 Sync and corrections by btsix www.addic7ed.com 1073 01:00:30,418 --> 01:00:32,253 ♪ Down where the trees grow ♪ 1074 01:00:32,337 --> 01:00:37,217 ♪ Together ♪