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Previously on The Affair...
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I don't want to have to pay
the rent by myself every month.
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Let's just go get married
at city hall tonight.
4
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I want a wedding,
at my grandparents' house.
5
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Whitney, this marriage thing,
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you don't have to do it,
you know.
7
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But, actually, Dad, I do,
because if I don't,
8
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then Colin has to leave
the country.
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I'm desperate for a date
to my opening tomorrow.
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- Dashiell Boucicault.
‐ Hi.
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He likes to watch.
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He could give you a gallery.
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‐ I'm married.
‐Thank you
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for finally telling me.
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‐That's it?
‐What do you want me to say?
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Doesn't matter.
You love me, too.
17
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Oh, it does matter.
And I don't forgive you.
18
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And how can I tell you I love
you? I don't even know you.
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You're working so calmly
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in the place
where your mother died.
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You were right.
22
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She died at the jetty.
23
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Why was your dad
obsessing about a Marine
24
00:01:04,982 --> 00:01:06,775
named Benjamin Cruz?
25
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I think he killed her.
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♪ I was screaming
into the canyon ♪
27
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♪ At the moment of my death ♪
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♪ The echo I created ♪
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♪ Outlasted my last breath ♪
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♪ My voice it made
an avalanche ♪
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♪ And buried a man
I never knew ♪
32
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♪ And when he died,
his widowed bride ♪
33
00:01:38,307 --> 00:01:40,851
♪ Met your daddy
and they made you ♪
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00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:43,812
♪ I have only one thing to do ♪
35
00:01:43,895 --> 00:01:45,981
♪ And that's be the wave
that I am, and then ♪
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♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪
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♪ I have only one thing to do ♪
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♪ And that's be the wave
that I am, and then ♪
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♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪
40
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♪ I have only one thing to do ♪
41
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♪ And that's be the wave
that I am, and then ♪
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♪ Sink back into the ocean,
sink back into the ocean ♪
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♪ Sink back into the o... ♪
44
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♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪
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♪ Sink back into the o... ♪
46
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♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪
47
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♪ Sink back
into the ocean ♪
48
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♪ "Walking with a Stranger"
by Chris Staples ♪
49
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♪ Well, it sure took forever ♪
50
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♪ But the summer finally came ♪
51
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♪ Felt like walking
with a stranger ♪
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♪ Who didn't even know
her name ♪
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♪ Pretty soon
I grew accustomed ♪
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♪ To her warm and sunny way ♪
55
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♪ Pretty soon I would forget ♪
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♪ About those frigid
winter days ♪
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♪ If you just stay true... ♪
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Thank God you're here.
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Your grandfather's been
driving me bonkers.
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‐Noah.
‐Margaret.
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‐Where's Helen?
‐Oh, I told you, Grandma.
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She couldn't come.
She had to work.
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Well, that's just disgusting.
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I don't think so.
65
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Well, of course it is.
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This is your wedding.
67
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What could be more important
than your wedding, Whitney?
68
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I swear I brought
your mother up better than that.
69
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I really did.
70
00:03:53,942 --> 00:03:56,069
Oh, well.
She's a lost cause.
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You're my only hope
for happiness now.
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Ugh. Come upstairs.
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I've laid out
all the bridal magazines.
74
00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:04,953
Noah, take Whitney's things
to the blue room.
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You're in the basement.
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Oh, and see if you can
find Bruce.
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He'd be thrilled to see you.
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Hey. Hey, Bruce.
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‐Hi.
‐H‐Hello.
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Who are you?
81
00:04:26,433 --> 00:04:29,186
Uh, Noah.
82
00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:31,938
Noah. N‐Noah Solloway?
83
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‐I'm your ex‐‐
‐Oh, oh. Yes, of course.
84
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I'm so sorry.
85
00:04:34,858 --> 00:04:36,985
Uh, Bruce Butler.
86
00:04:37,068 --> 00:04:39,488
Margaret told me
you were coming.
87
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The writer. Uh...
88
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She says you've published
multiple books.
89
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That's right, yeah.
90
00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:46,495
Wow, that's impressive.
91
00:04:46,578 --> 00:04:49,664
Uh, you know,
there's a great expression.
92
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Uh...
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"No one has one book
in him, but..."
94
00:04:55,587 --> 00:04:57,172
Um. It's, uh...
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I think it's,
"Everyone has one book in them.
96
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Almost nobody has two."
97
00:05:02,928 --> 00:05:06,723
Oh. Uh... That's not very nice.
98
00:05:06,807 --> 00:05:09,684
Uh, you know,
I always wanted to be a writer.
99
00:05:09,768 --> 00:05:13,271
But there never seemed
to be enough hours in the day.
100
00:05:13,355 --> 00:05:14,606
Yeah...
101
00:05:14,689 --> 00:05:17,150
Are you hungry?
I was craving some, uh,
102
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some of these, uh...
103
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‐ some of these...
‐ Here.
104
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Bruce, let‐let me
make those for you.
105
00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:23,907
No. No, no, you're our guest.
106
00:05:23,990 --> 00:05:27,160
You know... No, no.
You... have‐have some coffee.
107
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Uh, uh, I have no idea
how to use that machine.
108
00:05:31,498 --> 00:05:33,166
Sure, I'll make some.
109
00:05:33,250 --> 00:05:37,546
Um, are you, uh, you married?
110
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Uh, no. Divorced.
111
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Twice, actually.
112
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Well, that's probably why
you have so much time to write.
113
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I'm more of
a family man, myself.
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Bruce, no.
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‐ Oh...
‐Oh, Jesus.
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- ‐It's okay.
- ‐
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‐No...
‐I just, I just wanted to‐‐
118
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It's‐it's all right,
it's all right. Shh, shh.
119
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We're trying
to set boundaries for Bruce.
120
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Some new expectations.
121
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While you're here,
I'd appreciate it
122
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if you could help with that.
123
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I'm sorry.
I didn't... I didn't know.
124
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Well, now you do.
125
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Hi.
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Ah.
What are you doing here?
127
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‐I'm getting married.
‐What? To this fellow?
128
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Why, Helly‐Belly,
that's fantastic.
129
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Does this mean that
you've finally broken up
130
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with that kid from Pennsylvania?
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The‐the one that
was practically a mute?
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00:06:31,057 --> 00:06:32,893
Bruce, t‐this is Whitney.
133
00:06:32,976 --> 00:06:36,187
Helen is your daughter.
This is your granddaughter.
134
00:06:36,271 --> 00:06:38,106
G‐Granddaughter?
135
00:06:38,189 --> 00:06:39,941
I can't do this anymore.
136
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It's okay.
Margaret, it's okay.
137
00:06:40,984 --> 00:06:42,485
Let's‐let's focus
on the wedding. Uh...
138
00:06:42,569 --> 00:06:44,362
Whitney has this huge agenda
for us,
139
00:06:44,446 --> 00:06:46,323
and, uh, she needs your help.
140
00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:47,866
Uh, that's right, Grandma.
141
00:06:47,949 --> 00:06:50,493
Um, I need to decide
on a florist.
142
00:06:50,577 --> 00:06:51,953
I've narrowed it down to three,
143
00:06:52,037 --> 00:06:53,455
but I'm sure
you'll have an opinion.
144
00:06:53,538 --> 00:06:56,124
Um, I need to
figure out a caterer.
145
00:06:56,207 --> 00:06:58,043
I wanted to find somebody
who could do vegan options.
146
00:06:58,126 --> 00:06:59,044
I don't know if you know
anybody.
147
00:06:59,127 --> 00:07:01,212
And, um... Oh, well,
we already got a tent.
148
00:07:01,296 --> 00:07:03,214
Oh, that reminds me.
149
00:07:03,298 --> 00:07:04,549
The bill for the tent came.
150
00:07:06,926 --> 00:07:08,803
Margaret, I'm...
151
00:07:08,887 --> 00:07:09,846
I thought I was doing
the catering,
152
00:07:09,929 --> 00:07:12,349
and you and Bruce were
gonna pay for the tent.
153
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:15,727
Noah, we can't pay for this.
It's $20,000.
154
00:07:16,478 --> 00:07:18,647
We don't have any money.
155
00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:20,857
And whose fault
is that, Marie Antoinette?
156
00:07:22,942 --> 00:07:25,570
Whitney,
I just had a splendid idea.
157
00:07:25,654 --> 00:07:29,407
Why don't I call Dean
at our tennis club?
158
00:07:29,491 --> 00:07:30,200
They do a marvelous brunch.
159
00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:32,035
And if we do
the wedding reception
160
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outside of peak hours,
161
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I'm sure we can get a discount
162
00:07:36,414 --> 00:07:37,749
on the cabana.
163
00:07:37,832 --> 00:07:39,000
They have a waffle station
164
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and a make‐your‐own‐omelette
bar.
165
00:07:42,253 --> 00:07:44,089
Excuse me, please.
166
00:07:47,634 --> 00:07:51,179
Okay, M‐Margaret, the‐the
wedding is happening here.
167
00:07:51,262 --> 00:07:53,348
Okay? So, if you want
to help,
168
00:07:53,431 --> 00:07:56,851
help us figure out
a way to make that happen.
169
00:07:58,853 --> 00:08:01,690
Hey.
170
00:08:05,527 --> 00:08:07,529
We can't afford a wedding,
can we?
171
00:08:07,612 --> 00:08:09,030
No one can afford a wedding.
Not really.
172
00:08:09,114 --> 00:08:11,533
We can figure it out.
173
00:08:11,616 --> 00:08:13,618
No, I‐I need
to get back to reality.
174
00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:15,078
I... Work has been crazy.
175
00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:16,538
I had to miss three days
to be here.
176
00:08:16,621 --> 00:08:19,374
Andrea already wants
to fucking kill me.
177
00:08:19,457 --> 00:08:23,128
It's fine. We'll just...
we'll get married at city hall.
178
00:08:23,211 --> 00:08:25,213
Come on, Whitney. You've been
talking about having a wedding
179
00:08:25,296 --> 00:08:26,715
in this house since
before you were in braces.
180
00:08:26,798 --> 00:08:28,133
I already found a red‐eye
that we can get on tonight.
181
00:08:28,216 --> 00:08:30,135
It has seats available.
182
00:08:30,218 --> 00:08:32,095
Give me six hours.
183
00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:33,513
Okay? Let's at least try.
184
00:08:33,596 --> 00:08:36,224
Then if you still
want to go to city hall,
185
00:08:36,307 --> 00:08:37,809
then we'll go to city hall.
186
00:08:37,892 --> 00:08:40,478
Come on. Have you got a pen?
187
00:08:45,316 --> 00:08:47,652
Right.
What's the first thing?
188
00:08:47,736 --> 00:08:49,404
‐Um...
‐Tent.
189
00:08:49,487 --> 00:08:51,740
Okay, I just received
the last part of my advance,
190
00:08:51,823 --> 00:08:54,117
and I can't think of a better
thing to spend it on.
191
00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:55,410
‐Dad, no.
‐So that's that done.
192
00:08:55,493 --> 00:08:57,662
‐Next?
‐Dad, you don't get it.
193
00:08:57,746 --> 00:09:00,582
A‐A tent is no good if you don't
have things to put in it.
194
00:09:00,665 --> 00:09:02,917
Backyard weddings are so
expensive because you have
195
00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:06,546
to pay for every single
little thing. See?
196
00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:10,300
Okay.
197
00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:12,343
Let's start with plates.
198
00:09:14,179 --> 00:09:16,347
Well, this house
has got to have plenty of those.
199
00:09:16,431 --> 00:09:18,641
I always hoped
200
00:09:18,725 --> 00:09:21,269
your mother would inherit this,
201
00:09:21,352 --> 00:09:23,229
but she insists
on feeding you all
202
00:09:23,313 --> 00:09:25,690
from earthenware as if
she grew up on a riverbank.
203
00:09:25,774 --> 00:09:27,442
But no matter,
204
00:09:27,525 --> 00:09:29,277
because now it'll go to someone
who appreciates it.
205
00:09:29,360 --> 00:09:32,155
‐Thank you, Grandma.
‐This is helpful.
206
00:09:32,238 --> 00:09:33,948
Thanks. What's next?
207
00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:36,618
Oh, I have an appointment at
an East Hampton bridal boutique
208
00:09:36,701 --> 00:09:38,620
at two,
but it's crazy expensive.
209
00:09:38,703 --> 00:09:41,539
‐I think we should cancel it.
‐You don't have a dress yet?
210
00:09:41,623 --> 00:09:43,333
Perfect. Come on, let's go.
211
00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:44,216
Oh, Margaret,
can we borrow your car?
212
00:09:44,250 --> 00:09:47,128
Only if Whitney drives.
213
00:09:47,212 --> 00:09:49,297
‐Why?
‐Because the last time you drove
214
00:09:49,380 --> 00:09:51,800
a car in Montauk,
you killed Scott Lockhart.
215
00:10:01,059 --> 00:10:03,311
So, what do you want
to do about music?
216
00:10:03,394 --> 00:10:05,480
You want dancing, right?
217
00:10:05,563 --> 00:10:07,690
Honestly, I kind of wanted
a flash mob.
218
00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:10,193
‐What?
‐You know, a flash mob?
219
00:10:10,276 --> 00:10:12,821
It's, like, a surprise dance,
but everyone knows the steps.
220
00:10:12,904 --> 00:10:16,157
How could everybody know
the steps to a surprise dance?
221
00:10:16,241 --> 00:10:17,575
Because somebody teaches them
ahead of time,
222
00:10:17,659 --> 00:10:20,453
and it's like a... Never mind.
223
00:10:23,081 --> 00:10:24,833
Oh, look.
224
00:10:26,334 --> 00:10:27,961
We have to stop
225
00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:29,963
and see what they've done
to the Lobster Roll.
226
00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:30,922
No, Whit‐Whitney,
we don't have time.
227
00:10:31,005 --> 00:10:33,800
Yes, we do. Come on.
It'll be hilarious.
228
00:10:57,448 --> 00:10:58,908
Hi, we okay here?
229
00:11:02,537 --> 00:11:04,455
Not as friendly
as they used to be.
230
00:11:04,539 --> 00:11:06,207
Yeah.
231
00:11:10,837 --> 00:11:14,424
Hey, remember when Stacey
almost choked and Mom saved her?
232
00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:15,717
What?
233
00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:18,344
Yeah, you remember.
We were sitting right there,
234
00:11:18,428 --> 00:11:20,388
and Trevor and Stacey were
playing that game, and then
235
00:11:20,471 --> 00:11:21,806
Stacey put a marble
in her mouth.
236
00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:25,226
No, it wasn't, uh, it wasn't
your mom who saved her.
237
00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:27,478
It was, it was Alison.
238
00:11:27,562 --> 00:11:29,397
What?
239
00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:31,399
No, that's‐that's not
how I remember it at all.
240
00:11:31,482 --> 00:11:32,734
No, I'm pretty sure it was her.
241
00:11:32,817 --> 00:11:34,861
Stacey was choking
and Alison was right there.
242
00:11:40,742 --> 00:11:43,494
So, was that the day
you met Alison?
243
00:11:44,412 --> 00:11:46,706
Yeah, I think it was.
244
00:11:48,291 --> 00:11:50,793
So you bonded over the fact that
Stacey almost choked to death?
245
00:11:52,629 --> 00:11:53,630
Whitney, if you ever want
to talk about what happened
246
00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:55,715
‐between Alison and me...
‐Yeah.
247
00:11:55,798 --> 00:11:56,925
Sure. I do, actually. Go ahead.
248
00:12:00,053 --> 00:12:02,597
Well, there's not... I didn't
exactly have a prepared speech.
249
00:12:02,680 --> 00:12:03,806
‐But if you‐‐
‐Yeah. That's what I thought.
250
00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:04,474
No, I mean, if you want
to ask questions or‐‐
251
00:12:04,557 --> 00:12:07,560
- ‐Stop.
- ‐ Noah?
252
00:12:08,519 --> 00:12:10,063
Luisa, hi.
253
00:12:10,146 --> 00:12:11,648
‐Hey.
‐Hey, you remember Whitney,
254
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:14,275
‐my daughter?
‐Yeah, of course. Uh...
255
00:12:14,359 --> 00:12:15,610
I babysat you one summer
at the Butlers'.
256
00:12:15,693 --> 00:12:17,278
I remember. Nice to see you.
257
00:12:17,362 --> 00:12:18,863
Yeah, we're in town planning
Whitney's wedding,
258
00:12:18,947 --> 00:12:20,448
if you can believe it.
259
00:12:20,531 --> 00:12:23,409
Cool. Congratulations.
260
00:12:23,493 --> 00:12:25,161
Thank you.
261
00:12:25,245 --> 00:12:27,372
So this is different.
262
00:12:27,455 --> 00:12:31,834
Yeah. It's officially in the
hands of the new owners now.
263
00:12:31,918 --> 00:12:34,337
I just came by to empty
a few things out of the office.
264
00:12:34,420 --> 00:12:36,172
Ah. End of an era.
265
00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:38,925
Yep.
266
00:12:40,843 --> 00:12:42,470
I have to get going.
267
00:12:42,553 --> 00:12:44,764
What's, uh, what's next for you?
268
00:12:44,847 --> 00:12:47,267
I'm going back to New York.
269
00:12:47,350 --> 00:12:48,309
‐Really?
‐Mm‐hmm.
270
00:12:48,393 --> 00:12:49,394
Wow.
271
00:12:49,477 --> 00:12:52,438
I can't believe you got Cole
to go to the city.
272
00:12:54,190 --> 00:12:55,942
We're separated, Noah.
273
00:12:56,025 --> 00:12:58,152
He and Joanie
are moving to Vermont.
274
00:12:58,236 --> 00:13:01,823
This afternoon, actually,
so I have to get going.
275
00:13:01,906 --> 00:13:02,991
Congratulations on
your wedding. Good luck.
276
00:13:06,744 --> 00:13:08,955
I'll be right back.
277
00:13:09,038 --> 00:13:10,039
No, Dad, she doesn't
want to talk to us.
278
00:13:14,252 --> 00:13:15,670
Hey, Luisa.
279
00:13:15,753 --> 00:13:17,171
I'm sorry
if I offended you there.
280
00:13:17,255 --> 00:13:20,174
‐I had no idea.
‐It's fine.
281
00:13:20,258 --> 00:13:21,843
That's terrible
about you and Cole.
282
00:13:21,926 --> 00:13:25,096
Well, the writing
was on the wall, wasn't it?
283
00:13:25,179 --> 00:13:28,850
Look, I was wondering, have you
any idea when they're leaving?
284
00:13:28,933 --> 00:13:31,728
‐Why?
‐'Cause I want to see Joanie.
285
00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:33,980
You can't just waltz
in and out of her life
286
00:13:34,063 --> 00:13:36,024
‐when it's convenient.
‐I know that. I know that.
287
00:13:36,107 --> 00:13:39,319
I raised her as my own for
two years. I care about her.
288
00:13:39,402 --> 00:13:40,320
Noah, I don't feel like getting
289
00:13:40,403 --> 00:13:42,363
‐in the middle of this.
‐No, I understand.
290
00:13:42,447 --> 00:13:44,032
If you could just tell me
when they're leaving,
291
00:13:44,115 --> 00:13:46,075
then I can swing by, and if Cole
doesn't want me to see her,
292
00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:47,660
that's fine, I just,
I don't want her to think
293
00:13:47,744 --> 00:13:49,162
I just disappeared.
294
00:13:50,997 --> 00:13:52,248
They're leaving at five.
295
00:13:52,331 --> 00:13:53,875
Thanks.
296
00:13:55,626 --> 00:13:57,920
I'm sorry about
how it turned out here, and...
297
00:13:58,004 --> 00:13:59,005
I hope there are
good things ahead.
298
00:14:00,882 --> 00:14:03,843
Noah, I babysat your kids.
299
00:14:03,926 --> 00:14:06,137
My mother worked at your house.
300
00:14:06,220 --> 00:14:07,930
Don't pretend we're friends.
301
00:14:28,034 --> 00:14:30,870
‐Hey, can I get a menu, please?
‐You order on that.
302
00:14:33,581 --> 00:14:35,792
♪ And death grabbed him
so quiet ♪
303
00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:38,086
♪ It didn't even make a sound ♪
304
00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:45,927
♪ As far as I could see
were dead leaves... ♪
305
00:14:46,010 --> 00:14:48,596
Hey, just‐just pull over
right here, will you?
306
00:14:48,679 --> 00:14:50,765
‐ What, here?
‐Yeah. Just for a second.
307
00:14:50,848 --> 00:14:53,851
♪ Pretty soon I grow a cold ♪
308
00:14:53,935 --> 00:14:58,439
♪ And hollow feeling
in my heart ♪
309
00:15:01,651 --> 00:15:05,863
♪ Pretty soon me
and my sunny day ♪
310
00:15:05,947 --> 00:15:07,657
♪ Will have to part ♪
311
00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:10,993
♪ If you just... ♪
312
00:15:11,077 --> 00:15:14,622
Hey... you think these
would look good in a bouquet?
313
00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:16,916
Uh, you know th...
that's poison ivy, right?
314
00:15:16,999 --> 00:15:19,168
‐This is not poison ivy.
‐Not the stuff you got in your hand, man.
315
00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:22,421
The three‐leafed plants that are
all around where you were
316
00:15:22,505 --> 00:15:23,798
‐secret gardening.
‐W... N...
317
00:15:23,881 --> 00:15:24,799
Poison ivy doesn't grow
in the winter.
318
00:15:24,882 --> 00:15:27,343
Oh, yeah.
It definitely does.
319
00:15:27,426 --> 00:15:30,555
Oh, fuck.
320
00:15:37,478 --> 00:15:39,647
Yay.
321
00:15:39,730 --> 00:15:41,357
‐Are you Mr. Solloway?
‐Yeah. Hi.
322
00:15:41,440 --> 00:15:44,694
Yeah, they told me at the front
that Whitney might be back here.
323
00:15:44,777 --> 00:15:47,071
‐She sure is. Welcome.
‐Thank you.
324
00:15:50,533 --> 00:15:53,035
‐ Hi, Dad.
‐Hey, Whit. How's it going?
325
00:15:53,119 --> 00:15:54,078
Good.
326
00:15:54,162 --> 00:15:55,830
Oh, thanks.
327
00:15:55,913 --> 00:15:57,540
It is so cute that you're here.
328
00:15:57,623 --> 00:15:59,959
We almost never see dads
in the shop.
329
00:16:00,042 --> 00:16:03,004
- ‐What do you do?
- ‐ He's a writer.
330
00:16:03,087 --> 00:16:04,839
Ooh. Anything I'd know?
331
00:16:04,922 --> 00:16:06,924
- ‐I doubt it.
- ‐ He's being very
332
00:16:07,008 --> 00:16:09,302
modest. He has
a movie coming out
333
00:16:09,385 --> 00:16:11,012
‐starring Sasha Mann.
‐Sasha Mann?
334
00:16:11,095 --> 00:16:14,515
I fucking love Sasha Mann, wow.
335
00:16:14,599 --> 00:16:15,850
Hey, Hannah,
could you come back here
336
00:16:15,933 --> 00:16:16,434
and give me a hand
with these clamps?
337
00:16:16,517 --> 00:16:18,352
Coming.
338
00:16:32,116 --> 00:16:33,993
Okay...
339
00:16:56,766 --> 00:16:59,644
Well?
340
00:17:00,645 --> 00:17:02,230
What do you think?
341
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:06,776
Oh, Whit.
342
00:17:06,859 --> 00:17:07,659
You're beautiful.
343
00:17:07,693 --> 00:17:10,529
Thanks, Dad.
344
00:17:10,613 --> 00:17:14,242
You guys are gonna make
the cutest father‐daughter ever.
345
00:17:14,325 --> 00:17:16,786
Wow. Whitney, it's 19,
346
00:17:16,869 --> 00:17:19,413
but I'll knock it down to 17
because it's...
347
00:17:19,497 --> 00:17:21,457
it's just so...
it's perfect.
348
00:17:21,540 --> 00:17:24,043
Uh, wh... That's, uh...
349
00:17:24,126 --> 00:17:25,127
17, as in thousand?
350
00:17:25,211 --> 00:17:29,298
Mm, sometimes dads
just need a little convincing.
351
00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:30,424
Do you mind pulling
a few less expensive
352
00:17:30,508 --> 00:17:33,261
options?
353
00:17:33,344 --> 00:17:36,722
Uh, Lizzie! Can you
come here a second?
354
00:17:36,806 --> 00:17:39,600
Oh... sweetheart.
355
00:17:39,684 --> 00:17:44,647
You are front‐cover
Martha‐Stewart gorgeous.
356
00:17:44,730 --> 00:17:46,190
- ‐Isn't it perfect?
- ‐ Mm‐hm.
357
00:17:46,274 --> 00:17:48,109
Whitney thinks so, too.
358
00:17:48,192 --> 00:17:50,611
Actually, I was wondering if you
could pull some cheaper options?
359
00:17:50,695 --> 00:17:51,988
Ah, she is such a doll.
360
00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:53,614
Is she your first
to get married?
361
00:17:53,698 --> 00:17:55,783
Yeah. Yeah.
362
00:17:55,866 --> 00:17:59,036
Okay. So, like, what price range
were you thinking?
363
00:17:59,120 --> 00:18:00,913
Uh... Wh...
I‐I don't know, I‐I‐‐
364
00:18:00,997 --> 00:18:02,873
He's a big screenwriter.
365
00:18:02,957 --> 00:18:06,335
He works with Sasha Mann.
366
00:18:06,419 --> 00:18:07,962
Really?
367
00:18:08,045 --> 00:18:09,505
Let me ask you something,
Mr. Hollywood.
368
00:18:09,589 --> 00:18:11,882
When will there ever be
a more important time
369
00:18:11,966 --> 00:18:13,884
to splurge than for your
eldest daughter's wedding?
370
00:18:15,428 --> 00:18:16,971
She loves this dress.
371
00:18:17,054 --> 00:18:21,642
Uh... Look, maybe...
maybe I can, um...
372
00:18:21,726 --> 00:18:22,643
‐ Maybe...
‐ Don't, Dad.
373
00:18:22,727 --> 00:18:23,561
It's okay. It's okay.
I'm gonna change.
374
00:18:23,644 --> 00:18:27,023
I'm sorry, what,
what's happening here?
375
00:18:27,106 --> 00:18:28,107
I didn't know the dresses
were this expensive. I...
376
00:18:28,190 --> 00:18:30,776
I haven't earned
that kind of money yet.
377
00:18:30,860 --> 00:18:32,903
Well, then why did you waste
our time with this appointment?
378
00:18:32,987 --> 00:18:35,489
It was my idea, Hannah,
and it was a big mistake.
379
00:18:35,573 --> 00:18:39,452
What kind of psycho
spends $17,000 on a dress?
380
00:18:39,535 --> 00:18:40,453
Do you know how many
clean water wells
381
00:18:40,536 --> 00:18:42,204
you could build in Africa
with that money?
382
00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:46,042
‐No. Do you?
‐I bet it's a lot, you cunt.
383
00:18:47,376 --> 00:18:49,295
Nice work, Dad.
384
00:19:02,016 --> 00:19:04,769
Dad... what's up
with the itching?
385
00:19:04,852 --> 00:19:06,896
It's fucking...
386
00:19:06,979 --> 00:19:09,857
‐poison ivy.
‐What?
387
00:19:09,940 --> 00:19:12,276
Yeah, I tried to pick you
some wildflowers.
388
00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:14,070
Thought you might like them.
389
00:19:22,286 --> 00:19:23,204
What?
390
00:19:23,287 --> 00:19:26,499
I know what you're trying to do.
391
00:19:26,582 --> 00:19:27,917
And I appreciate it.
392
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:30,252
What am I trying to do?
393
00:19:32,380 --> 00:19:34,173
You're trying to make amends.
394
00:19:41,055 --> 00:19:43,891
Oh, look, a daytime moon.
395
00:19:43,974 --> 00:19:47,311
Your mom always used to say
they were good luck.
396
00:19:49,980 --> 00:19:54,276
♪ I wandered out
in the woods for years ♪
397
00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:57,822
♪ While you just stayed
in your room ♪
398
00:19:57,905 --> 00:20:00,908
♪ I saw the crescent ♪
399
00:20:00,991 --> 00:20:04,912
♪ You saw the whole
of the moon ♪
400
00:20:04,995 --> 00:20:06,080
‐♪ Doo‐doo‐nee‐nee ♪
‐
401
00:20:06,163 --> 00:20:08,332
♪ The whole of... ♪
Who's that?
402
00:20:08,416 --> 00:20:10,251
‐Who sings that?
‐I don't know.
403
00:20:10,334 --> 00:20:12,753
Colin's always playing it,
it stuck in my head.
404
00:20:12,837 --> 00:20:15,631
It was the Waterboys.
That's my generation.
405
00:20:15,715 --> 00:20:18,843
Yeah, I think they're Irish.
I don't know, Colin's obsessed.
406
00:20:18,926 --> 00:20:21,095
‐Mmm, boy's got good taste.
‐
407
00:20:24,849 --> 00:20:28,978
Hey, I got an idea, but,
uh, you may hate it.
408
00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:31,439
Your mom had a really beautiful
wedding dress.
409
00:20:34,024 --> 00:20:36,777
And I don't know where it is
now, but your grandmother,
410
00:20:36,861 --> 00:20:37,361
she'd probably have it.
411
00:20:37,445 --> 00:20:39,405
We know she's a hoarder.
412
00:20:41,282 --> 00:20:43,284
Okay. It was
a terrible idea.
413
00:20:43,367 --> 00:20:45,953
No.
414
00:20:46,036 --> 00:20:47,496
I love it.
415
00:20:51,959 --> 00:20:53,210
‐How'd it go?
‐Hey, Margaret, do you know
416
00:20:53,294 --> 00:20:55,838
where Helen's wedding dress is?
417
00:20:55,921 --> 00:20:58,215
She looked like a vagabond whore
in that dress. Why?
418
00:20:58,299 --> 00:21:01,010
Okay,
let's just check the attic.
419
00:21:30,915 --> 00:21:32,416
Sorry, I need a minute.
420
00:21:38,923 --> 00:21:40,591
What's wrong?
421
00:21:43,969 --> 00:21:46,639
You hate it?
422
00:21:46,722 --> 00:21:49,058
- ‐You hate it, right?
- ‐ No.
423
00:21:49,141 --> 00:21:50,810
Don't worry, don't worry.
We'll get another one.
424
00:21:50,893 --> 00:21:51,852
It's not the dress.
I love the dress.
425
00:21:51,936 --> 00:21:53,729
What is it?
426
00:21:53,813 --> 00:21:54,480
This wedding is gonna be
427
00:21:54,563 --> 00:21:56,357
‐a fucking disaster.
‐What?
428
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:58,400
No, it's not. Come on,
we're pulling it together.
429
00:21:58,484 --> 00:21:58,984
We got a tent,
we got the plates,
430
00:21:59,068 --> 00:21:59,902
now we got a dress.
431
00:21:59,985 --> 00:22:01,946
That's not what I mean.
432
00:22:02,029 --> 00:22:03,405
Then what is it?
433
00:22:11,205 --> 00:22:13,541
I cheated on Colin.
434
00:22:17,670 --> 00:22:19,213
Okay.
435
00:22:19,296 --> 00:22:21,048
Okay? That's what
you have to say to me?
436
00:22:21,131 --> 00:22:24,218
‐No, no.
‐God, why am I not surprised?
437
00:22:24,301 --> 00:22:25,101
When did this happen? Recently?
438
00:22:25,135 --> 00:22:28,264
Yeah.
439
00:22:28,347 --> 00:22:29,890
After you got engaged?
440
00:22:30,850 --> 00:22:32,142
Yeah.
441
00:22:33,394 --> 00:22:36,564
And I have to tell him, right?
442
00:22:39,567 --> 00:22:43,696
Uh... uh, not necessarily.
443
00:22:43,779 --> 00:22:47,992
I mean... did you want
to be with this other guy?
444
00:22:48,075 --> 00:22:49,702
No. God, no.
445
00:22:49,785 --> 00:22:52,454
Well, is there any other way
that Colin might find out?
446
00:22:52,538 --> 00:22:56,083
I mean, is it someone
who's around a lot, do you have
447
00:22:56,166 --> 00:22:59,378
‐friends in common?
‐No. Why?
448
00:23:01,046 --> 00:23:03,424
Because, in that case,
telling Colin might just
449
00:23:03,507 --> 00:23:05,092
hurt him unnecessarily.
450
00:23:05,175 --> 00:23:08,012
And end your relationship.
451
00:23:08,095 --> 00:23:09,346
I mean, unless...
452
00:23:09,430 --> 00:23:11,098
‐What?
‐Well, unless
453
00:23:11,181 --> 00:23:13,225
that's what you were
trying to do.
454
00:23:13,309 --> 00:23:14,518
‐
‐I...
455
00:23:17,438 --> 00:23:21,567
I don't know.
Uh... maybe.
456
00:23:23,736 --> 00:23:26,947
Whitney?
457
00:23:27,031 --> 00:23:29,491
Do you want to marry Colin?
458
00:23:29,575 --> 00:23:31,118
If you're asking if he's
the only person I'll ever love,
459
00:23:31,201 --> 00:23:33,537
I... I have no
fucking idea.
460
00:23:33,621 --> 00:23:35,039
How am I supposed to know that?
461
00:23:35,122 --> 00:23:36,123
Look, I don't think
anybody knows that.
462
00:23:36,206 --> 00:23:38,751
Yes, they do.
Some people do.
463
00:23:38,834 --> 00:23:39,960
‐Colin does.
‐Now, you don't know that.
464
00:23:40,044 --> 00:23:41,170
You're not in his head.
465
00:23:41,253 --> 00:23:44,340
For all you know, he's...
he's having major doubts, too.
466
00:23:44,423 --> 00:23:46,008
‐Wow.
‐No... not about you,
467
00:23:46,091 --> 00:23:48,093
about marriage.
468
00:23:48,177 --> 00:23:50,679
When I got married,
I thought that if you,
469
00:23:50,763 --> 00:23:51,847
if you, if you chose
the right person,
470
00:23:51,931 --> 00:23:54,308
then you'd be happy forever,
and if you were unhappy,
471
00:23:54,391 --> 00:23:55,601
then they were the wrong person.
472
00:23:55,684 --> 00:23:57,603
But that's just not
how it works.
473
00:23:57,686 --> 00:23:59,146
‐It's not?
‐No. No.
474
00:23:59,229 --> 00:24:00,481
Marriage is...
it's not magic, it's,
475
00:24:00,564 --> 00:24:02,983
it's just a decision
that you have to make.
476
00:24:03,067 --> 00:24:06,445
And keep on making,
over and over, to stay.
477
00:24:07,404 --> 00:24:08,405
Whitney,
478
00:24:08,489 --> 00:24:09,698
deciding you're not ready
479
00:24:09,782 --> 00:24:11,116
doesn't mean
you're a bad person.
480
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:12,493
It means you know yourself
481
00:24:12,576 --> 00:24:14,662
much better than I knew
when I was your age.
482
00:24:15,621 --> 00:24:18,666
No, I'm not hurting Colin.
I'm not doing it.
483
00:24:18,749 --> 00:24:20,542
‐He's my best friend.
‐He'll be okay.
484
00:24:20,626 --> 00:24:22,169
He, he... he'll survive.
485
00:24:22,252 --> 00:24:25,089
You hurt Mom so badly.
486
00:24:27,633 --> 00:24:29,468
Yeah, but that was...
487
00:24:29,551 --> 00:24:32,680
that was different.
We had four kids.
488
00:24:32,763 --> 00:24:34,932
I don't want to ever hurt anyone
the way you hurt her.
489
00:24:35,015 --> 00:24:37,518
Right.
490
00:24:37,601 --> 00:24:39,186
Why did you do it?
491
00:24:39,269 --> 00:24:41,605
If marriage is a choice,
if you can decide to stay,
492
00:24:41,689 --> 00:24:43,190
why did you go?
493
00:24:47,277 --> 00:24:49,488
I don't know how to answer that.
494
00:24:50,447 --> 00:24:52,157
Was it Alison?
495
00:24:52,241 --> 00:24:54,368
Did you just love her
more than you loved us?
496
00:24:54,451 --> 00:24:55,536
No.
497
00:24:55,619 --> 00:24:57,079
What was it, then?
498
00:25:01,333 --> 00:25:02,710
I don't know.
499
00:25:02,793 --> 00:25:04,086
See, the thing
that I don't get is,
500
00:25:04,169 --> 00:25:05,921
you were a good dad.
501
00:25:06,005 --> 00:25:09,258
And Mom was a great mom,
and‐and we were happy.
502
00:25:09,341 --> 00:25:11,051
Or at least I thought we were.
503
00:25:11,135 --> 00:25:12,678
And then...
504
00:25:15,556 --> 00:25:17,683
I guess I just worry that,
505
00:25:17,766 --> 00:25:19,393
if that wasn't real
506
00:25:19,476 --> 00:25:20,853
and if that wasn't good,
507
00:25:20,936 --> 00:25:25,274
then... then maybe nothing is.
508
00:25:25,357 --> 00:25:27,985
Whitney, look, I fucked up.
509
00:25:28,068 --> 00:25:28,868
I...
510
00:25:33,073 --> 00:25:35,451
I was thinking about myself,
and I fucked up.
511
00:25:38,746 --> 00:25:43,042
Which is why I want you
to give yourself the time
512
00:25:43,125 --> 00:25:44,585
to make the right decision.
513
00:25:47,337 --> 00:25:50,632
I love you, Whit.
I just want you to be happy.
514
00:25:51,842 --> 00:25:54,720
I love you, too.
515
00:25:54,803 --> 00:25:56,722
Come on.
516
00:26:03,729 --> 00:26:05,689
I got to change
out of this dress.
517
00:26:16,492 --> 00:26:19,411
Oh, fuck.
518
00:26:33,008 --> 00:26:35,010
Hello?
519
00:26:35,094 --> 00:26:38,597
Noah, hi. This is
Petra Ranes from Vanity Fair.
520
00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:42,142
Oh, hi, Petra.
It's been a while.
521
00:26:42,226 --> 00:26:43,685
‐How are you?
‐I'm good.
522
00:26:43,769 --> 00:26:46,063
And the piece is really
coming together.
523
00:26:46,146 --> 00:26:47,272
‐Great.
‐I'm just doing a last
524
00:26:47,356 --> 00:26:49,149
little bit of fact‐checking,
if you have a second.
525
00:26:49,233 --> 00:26:52,152
‐Sure.
‐Great.
526
00:26:52,236 --> 00:26:55,155
So, do you happen to know
a woman named Eden Bishop?
527
00:26:56,448 --> 00:26:58,242
Uh... no, I don't think so.
528
00:26:58,325 --> 00:26:59,660
That's her married name.
529
00:26:59,743 --> 00:27:03,455
Maybe you know her
as Ellery? Eden Ellery?
530
00:27:03,539 --> 00:27:05,332
Oh, yeah, yeah, she was,
uh, she was my publicist
531
00:27:05,415 --> 00:27:07,751
on the book tour for Descent.
532
00:27:07,835 --> 00:27:09,461
That's what she said, too.
533
00:27:10,462 --> 00:27:12,297
Okay?
534
00:27:12,381 --> 00:27:13,841
Did you two have a relationship?
535
00:27:13,924 --> 00:27:16,051
Beyond the professional?
536
00:27:16,135 --> 00:27:17,886
Me and Eden?
537
00:27:17,970 --> 00:27:20,639
She claims you pressured her
into sleeping with you
538
00:27:20,722 --> 00:27:22,140
on the book tour.
539
00:27:22,224 --> 00:27:24,017
Does that match
your recollection?
540
00:27:29,297 --> 00:27:30,097
Sorry, wh‐what did you say?
541
00:27:30,107 --> 00:27:32,693
The reception here is terrible.
542
00:27:32,776 --> 00:27:33,576
Eden claims you coerced her
into having sex
543
00:27:33,652 --> 00:27:36,405
while on the book tour together.
544
00:27:36,488 --> 00:27:38,949
I'm asking if you remember
something like that happening
545
00:27:39,032 --> 00:27:40,951
between you and her
during that time.
546
00:27:42,494 --> 00:27:44,830
No. Absolutely not.
547
00:27:44,913 --> 00:27:46,039
Are you sure?
548
00:27:46,123 --> 00:27:49,001
This is fucking shit!
What? No!
549
00:27:49,084 --> 00:27:50,210
So that's not your memory?
550
00:27:50,294 --> 00:27:53,046
‐No!
‐Okay. That's it, then.
551
00:27:53,130 --> 00:27:55,799
I just needed a comment.
Thanks for your time.
552
00:28:00,137 --> 00:28:02,306
What...?
553
00:28:04,349 --> 00:28:06,435
Oh, fuck.
554
00:29:36,650 --> 00:29:38,485
Yes?
555
00:29:38,568 --> 00:29:42,781
Hi, I'm looking
for Benjamin Cruz.
556
00:29:48,245 --> 00:29:50,414
I'm Ben Cruz.
557
00:29:50,497 --> 00:29:51,873
Can I help you?
558
00:29:52,916 --> 00:29:57,212
I just wanted to ask
about your clinic.
559
00:29:57,295 --> 00:30:02,134
I... I need help.
560
00:30:02,217 --> 00:30:04,302
I think I have PTSD.
561
00:30:05,262 --> 00:30:08,015
Ah.
562
00:30:08,098 --> 00:30:09,766
What's your name?
563
00:30:09,850 --> 00:30:12,144
Gabrielle.
564
00:30:15,439 --> 00:30:16,523
Very nice to meet you.
565
00:30:16,606 --> 00:30:19,526
Come on inside.
566
00:30:26,450 --> 00:30:28,952
Danny, Isla, meet Gabrielle.
567
00:30:29,036 --> 00:30:31,038
She's here to learn
about our community.
568
00:30:31,121 --> 00:30:31,955
‐Hey there.
‐Hey.
569
00:30:34,332 --> 00:30:35,417
Hi.
570
00:30:35,500 --> 00:30:38,003
I thought I was the only one
571
00:30:38,086 --> 00:30:40,839
who read real books anymore.
572
00:30:45,052 --> 00:30:47,012
How about I give you a tour?
573
00:30:51,808 --> 00:30:54,644
I believe in the healing power
574
00:30:54,728 --> 00:30:57,856
of fresh air
and tilling the land.
575
00:30:57,939 --> 00:31:01,193
Everything here has been
designed to be self‐sustaining.
576
00:31:01,276 --> 00:31:04,529
My patients get free lodging
577
00:31:04,613 --> 00:31:08,366
in return for their time
in the garden.
578
00:31:08,450 --> 00:31:11,119
So, a‐are you
a veteran, Gabrielle?
579
00:31:11,203 --> 00:31:14,247
Um, no, I'm not.
580
00:31:14,331 --> 00:31:16,666
How did you find us, then?
581
00:31:16,750 --> 00:31:19,002
Recommendation.
582
00:31:21,671 --> 00:31:25,425
I only ask because we
mostly service ex‐military.
583
00:31:25,509 --> 00:31:26,802
When I was a young vet,
I started
584
00:31:26,885 --> 00:31:30,472
my post‐service career
at the VA,
585
00:31:30,555 --> 00:31:32,516
during what I thought
was a really exciting time
586
00:31:32,599 --> 00:31:34,434
for PTSD therapy.
587
00:31:34,518 --> 00:31:37,562
Newer, integrative
psychotherapeutic approaches
588
00:31:37,646 --> 00:31:40,649
like exposure therapy, EMDR.
589
00:31:40,732 --> 00:31:43,068
They all seemed
to be taking root
590
00:31:43,151 --> 00:31:45,570
in the mainstream community,
591
00:31:45,654 --> 00:31:49,032
but then, of course,
they were obliterated
592
00:31:49,116 --> 00:31:51,785
as soon as the government
deregulated
593
00:31:51,868 --> 00:31:53,495
psychopharmaceutical drugs.
594
00:31:53,578 --> 00:31:55,455
If vets want
alternative therapies,
595
00:31:55,539 --> 00:31:58,041
they have to seek them
under the table,
596
00:31:58,125 --> 00:32:01,002
pay out of pocket,
get treatments in secret.
597
00:32:01,086 --> 00:32:05,006
If the VA finds out,
people lose their health care.
598
00:32:06,758 --> 00:32:08,468
Anyway,
599
00:32:08,552 --> 00:32:12,430
that's why I have to be
extra careful
600
00:32:12,514 --> 00:32:14,307
when people knock on my door.
601
00:32:14,391 --> 00:32:18,061
Well, you weren't that careful.
You kind of just let me in.
602
00:32:19,271 --> 00:32:22,107
True.
603
00:32:23,233 --> 00:32:26,027
But you have an honest face.
604
00:32:26,736 --> 00:32:29,781
We grow all our own food.
605
00:32:29,865 --> 00:32:31,074
There's something so
606
00:32:31,158 --> 00:32:33,869
satisfying about putting
your hands in the dirt,
607
00:32:33,952 --> 00:32:37,914
turning the soil,
caring for the space,
608
00:32:37,998 --> 00:32:42,043
and then watch it
as it bears fruit.
609
00:32:42,127 --> 00:32:44,421
Here,
610
00:32:44,504 --> 00:32:47,549
the land that we've
taken care of
611
00:32:47,632 --> 00:32:49,968
then turns around
and cares for us.
612
00:32:50,051 --> 00:32:53,054
I firmly believe,
613
00:32:53,138 --> 00:32:56,516
if we can remember
how to care for a garden,
614
00:32:56,600 --> 00:33:00,395
we can remember
how to care for each other.
615
00:33:09,863 --> 00:33:11,907
Thank you.
616
00:33:13,950 --> 00:33:15,869
Let's head back inside.
617
00:33:15,952 --> 00:33:19,331
Get to know each other
a bit better.
618
00:33:24,252 --> 00:33:25,879
So...
619
00:33:25,962 --> 00:33:28,048
Gabrielle.
620
00:33:28,131 --> 00:33:30,175
That's a beautiful name,
by the way.
621
00:33:30,258 --> 00:33:30,717
Thank you.
622
00:33:30,800 --> 00:33:34,638
Is it a family name?
623
00:33:34,721 --> 00:33:36,556
Yes.
624
00:33:38,850 --> 00:33:40,560
So tell me,
625
00:33:40,644 --> 00:33:42,771
how can I help you?
626
00:33:47,025 --> 00:33:48,735
I think I suffer from PTSD.
627
00:33:48,818 --> 00:33:53,782
Okay.
How does that manifest?
628
00:33:55,617 --> 00:33:58,078
I can't connect with people.
I think I'm incapable of love.
629
00:33:58,161 --> 00:34:02,749
Well, sometimes such feelings
are connected
630
00:34:02,832 --> 00:34:07,087
to a significant loss or trauma
631
00:34:07,170 --> 00:34:08,255
at an early age.
632
00:34:10,507 --> 00:34:13,093
Does that resonate with you?
633
00:34:13,176 --> 00:34:14,469
No.
634
00:34:14,552 --> 00:34:18,014
Hmm.
635
00:34:18,098 --> 00:34:20,934
Are you familiar with EMDR?
636
00:34:21,017 --> 00:34:22,978
No.
637
00:34:23,061 --> 00:34:25,063
It's an old form of therapy.
638
00:34:25,146 --> 00:34:28,942
Nobody really understands
why it works or how,
639
00:34:29,025 --> 00:34:31,278
but it does.
640
00:34:31,361 --> 00:34:33,488
There's something
almost magical about it.
641
00:34:34,698 --> 00:34:37,284
Mm. You don't believe in magic?
642
00:34:37,367 --> 00:34:38,034
No.
643
00:34:38,118 --> 00:34:43,206
Maybe that's why
you have such...
644
00:34:43,290 --> 00:34:45,166
trouble with love.
645
00:34:47,669 --> 00:34:50,130
Would you like to try EMDR?
646
00:34:50,213 --> 00:34:54,009
J‐Just to see if we can get
a little closer
647
00:34:54,092 --> 00:34:58,305
to understanding why you came.
648
00:35:00,724 --> 00:35:04,561
Sure. Why not?
649
00:35:04,644 --> 00:35:06,688
Excellent.
650
00:35:06,771 --> 00:35:09,524
I record all my sessions.
Do you mind?
651
00:35:11,651 --> 00:35:13,862
And this is just
652
00:35:13,945 --> 00:35:17,616
our standard release form.
653
00:35:20,452 --> 00:35:21,453
It's on paper.
654
00:35:21,536 --> 00:35:23,788
I know. What can I say?
655
00:35:23,872 --> 00:35:25,749
I am nostalgic
for the analog world.
656
00:35:25,832 --> 00:35:29,252
I suspect you are, too.
657
00:35:30,128 --> 00:35:32,964
Well, take a moment,
read it through.
658
00:35:33,048 --> 00:35:35,091
What's the date?
659
00:35:35,175 --> 00:35:36,718
Oh, don't worry about that.
660
00:35:36,801 --> 00:35:37,601
I just need your signature.
661
00:35:40,972 --> 00:35:44,684
Okay. Thank you.
662
00:35:44,768 --> 00:35:46,144
So...
663
00:35:46,227 --> 00:35:49,230
the way EMDR works.
664
00:35:50,523 --> 00:35:54,694
We pick one specific
traumatic event
665
00:35:54,778 --> 00:35:56,321
and then we basically
rewrite the script
666
00:35:56,404 --> 00:36:00,700
so it doesn't trigger
the same debilitating response.
667
00:36:00,784 --> 00:36:01,993
Does that make sense?
Good.
668
00:36:02,077 --> 00:36:07,540
We can start
on any memory, really.
669
00:36:07,624 --> 00:36:10,877
Is there a moment, a...
670
00:36:10,960 --> 00:36:14,047
a night where you remember this,
671
00:36:14,130 --> 00:36:17,008
as you say, "inability to love"
672
00:36:17,092 --> 00:36:19,010
really manifesting itself,
673
00:36:19,094 --> 00:36:21,429
impeding your life in some way?
674
00:36:24,974 --> 00:36:26,726
I...
675
00:36:28,478 --> 00:36:32,232
I had a fight
with my boyfriend recently.
676
00:36:32,315 --> 00:36:34,609
Excellent.
677
00:36:34,693 --> 00:36:38,738
That is the perfect thing
to unpack with this therapy.
678
00:36:38,822 --> 00:36:40,156
Let's start there.
679
00:36:40,240 --> 00:36:44,577
Can you please, um,
move your chair
680
00:36:44,661 --> 00:36:45,870
to face me.
681
00:36:48,665 --> 00:36:51,501
Good.
682
00:36:54,629 --> 00:36:57,882
No, see, you need to be
a little closer.
683
00:36:57,966 --> 00:37:01,761
There you go.
684
00:37:01,845 --> 00:37:03,471
Okay, to begin,
685
00:37:03,555 --> 00:37:07,058
just follow my fingers
with your eyes.
686
00:37:11,104 --> 00:37:13,565
‐Th‐That makes me dizzy.
‐Okay.
687
00:37:13,648 --> 00:37:17,402
Let's switch to something else.
688
00:37:19,362 --> 00:37:21,448
Your palms up.
689
00:37:21,531 --> 00:37:23,366
There you go.
690
00:37:26,453 --> 00:37:30,957
Close your eyes
and take a deep breath.
691
00:37:35,295 --> 00:37:37,964
Now think back
to the night of the fight.
692
00:37:38,047 --> 00:37:41,551
What do you notice?
693
00:37:41,634 --> 00:37:42,434
Where are you?
694
00:37:45,138 --> 00:37:46,973
I'm in my apartment.
695
00:37:47,056 --> 00:37:49,434
‐Where is that?
‐Montauk.
696
00:37:51,478 --> 00:37:53,521
How about your boyfriend,
is he there?
697
00:37:53,605 --> 00:37:54,856
He's on his way.
698
00:37:54,939 --> 00:37:58,067
How do you feel?
699
00:37:58,151 --> 00:38:00,320
Scared.
700
00:38:00,403 --> 00:38:02,906
Good. Go with that.
701
00:38:04,908 --> 00:38:07,911
Same as before.
702
00:38:07,994 --> 00:38:12,457
Tell me...
what do you notice?
703
00:38:12,540 --> 00:38:16,836
My apartment is warm, cozy.
704
00:38:16,920 --> 00:38:19,339
There's a fire in the fireplace.
705
00:38:19,422 --> 00:38:22,217
My daughter's drawings
706
00:38:22,300 --> 00:38:25,220
are on the refrigerator.
707
00:38:25,303 --> 00:38:27,430
It's raining outside.
708
00:38:27,514 --> 00:38:32,894
Pouring, actually.
There's a storm, a... a bad one.
709
00:38:32,977 --> 00:38:33,853
The windows are rattling.
710
00:38:33,937 --> 00:38:36,022
Good. Go with that.
711
00:38:36,105 --> 00:38:40,193
Now what do you see happening?
712
00:38:40,276 --> 00:38:42,529
My boyfriend arrives.
713
00:38:42,612 --> 00:38:45,532
He's soaking wet.
He dries himself by the fire.
714
00:38:45,615 --> 00:38:47,200
How's he dressed?
715
00:38:47,283 --> 00:38:50,119
Jeans and a military jacket.
716
00:38:50,203 --> 00:38:52,997
He's a veteran.
717
00:38:53,081 --> 00:38:53,748
Good.
718
00:38:53,832 --> 00:38:56,960
Close your eyes.
719
00:38:57,043 --> 00:39:00,922
Notice what he says
720
00:39:01,005 --> 00:39:02,382
and go with that.
721
00:39:02,465 --> 00:39:05,677
‐He's angry.
‐Why is he angry?
722
00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:08,179
Because he's married,
723
00:39:08,263 --> 00:39:12,100
and I want him
to leave his wife.
724
00:39:12,183 --> 00:39:13,935
We have a fight.
725
00:39:14,018 --> 00:39:16,771
I tell him that if he doesn't
leave her, I will kill myself.
726
00:39:16,855 --> 00:39:18,398
Keep going.
727
00:39:18,481 --> 00:39:20,817
He tells me that
I'm ugly and stupid
728
00:39:20,900 --> 00:39:22,068
and that nobody
will ever love me,
729
00:39:22,151 --> 00:39:25,530
and that the best I could hope
for is to be someone's slut.
730
00:39:25,613 --> 00:39:27,740
Okay. That's enough.
731
00:39:29,659 --> 00:39:32,537
EMDR doesn't work
if you're lying.
732
00:39:44,215 --> 00:39:47,218
I never said those things.
733
00:39:47,302 --> 00:39:49,596
I respected your mother greatly.
734
00:39:52,098 --> 00:39:55,101
I would never have
spoken that way to her.
735
00:40:08,531 --> 00:40:10,074
Hello, Joanie.
736
00:40:10,158 --> 00:40:11,618
Hello, Ben.
737
00:40:14,203 --> 00:40:16,581
I'm so glad
you are finally here.
738
00:40:21,210 --> 00:40:24,088
Why don't we start again
with the same question?
739
00:40:24,172 --> 00:40:26,758
How can I help you?
740
00:40:31,220 --> 00:40:33,765
Did you kill my mother?
741
00:40:37,810 --> 00:40:40,480
Yes.
742
00:40:40,563 --> 00:40:42,190
I did.
743
00:40:50,239 --> 00:40:54,160
I can only imagine
what you think of me right now.
744
00:40:54,243 --> 00:40:55,870
It's all so new for you.
745
00:40:58,623 --> 00:41:01,834
The truth is, I've been
thinking about you for years.
746
00:41:01,918 --> 00:41:06,214
I've tried to imagine where
you've been living your life
747
00:41:06,297 --> 00:41:07,799
and‐and how.
748
00:41:07,882 --> 00:41:12,220
I've awaited our reunion
with great anticipation.
749
00:41:16,307 --> 00:41:20,603
Is there anything else
you want to ask me?
750
00:41:20,687 --> 00:41:23,356
Anything at all?
751
00:41:23,439 --> 00:41:26,859
Go back behind your desk.
I need a barrier between us.
752
00:41:26,943 --> 00:41:29,779
Of course.
753
00:41:37,328 --> 00:41:40,164
I‐I want to be held
accountable, Joanie.
754
00:41:40,248 --> 00:41:41,833
I've always known
I would eventually
755
00:41:41,916 --> 00:41:44,711
have to answer for what I did.
756
00:41:44,794 --> 00:41:48,423
I welcome the opportunity.
757
00:41:51,676 --> 00:41:55,805
I know this might be hard
for you to believe,
758
00:41:55,888 --> 00:42:00,893
but I think of your mother
every day.
759
00:42:00,977 --> 00:42:03,396
Every minute, in fact.
760
00:42:03,479 --> 00:42:07,859
She is constantly with me,
761
00:42:07,942 --> 00:42:10,403
and...
762
00:42:10,486 --> 00:42:13,656
I hate myself for what I did.
763
00:42:13,740 --> 00:42:15,908
Okay. So why did you do it?
764
00:42:18,036 --> 00:42:20,079
I had a psychotic break.
765
00:42:20,163 --> 00:42:21,247
What?
766
00:42:21,330 --> 00:42:24,250
When I met your mother...
767
00:42:24,333 --> 00:42:26,753
the doctors at the VA
had me on a lot of drugs.
768
00:42:26,836 --> 00:42:28,921
Antidepressants, MDMA,
769
00:42:29,005 --> 00:42:31,257
antipsychotics.
770
00:42:31,340 --> 00:42:33,885
I was losing my mind.
771
00:42:33,968 --> 00:42:37,930
I couldn't sleep.
Uh, I‐I‐I was paranoid.
772
00:42:38,014 --> 00:42:39,640
I started hearing voices.
773
00:42:39,724 --> 00:42:42,477
I didn't tell anyone,
of course, because...
774
00:42:42,560 --> 00:42:45,521
I, I was afraid
they'd lock me up for good.
775
00:42:45,605 --> 00:42:50,610
That night...
I became a monster,
776
00:42:50,693 --> 00:42:53,154
uh, completely out of control.
777
00:42:54,280 --> 00:42:56,616
What did you do to her?
778
00:42:56,699 --> 00:42:58,951
Well, we had an argument
779
00:42:59,035 --> 00:43:01,996
in her apartment,
as you guessed.
780
00:43:02,080 --> 00:43:03,372
About what?
781
00:43:03,456 --> 00:43:05,124
The fact that I was married.
782
00:43:05,208 --> 00:43:07,835
So I was right.
783
00:43:07,919 --> 00:43:10,338
Yes.
784
00:43:10,421 --> 00:43:14,425
But she told me to leave.
785
00:43:16,969 --> 00:43:20,807
It was me
who was begging to stay.
786
00:43:20,890 --> 00:43:22,016
Why?
787
00:43:24,102 --> 00:43:26,354
Have you ever met someone
788
00:43:26,437 --> 00:43:29,649
who‐who looked at you,
789
00:43:29,732 --> 00:43:30,775
all of you,
790
00:43:30,858 --> 00:43:33,152
even the savage parts,
791
00:43:33,236 --> 00:43:34,821
and they didn't flinch?
792
00:43:37,073 --> 00:43:38,825
No.
793
00:43:38,908 --> 00:43:39,867
I thought she was gonna
be the one to bring me back,
794
00:43:39,951 --> 00:43:44,455
restore me to the man I was
before I went to war.
795
00:43:44,539 --> 00:43:45,957
That night
796
00:43:46,040 --> 00:43:48,793
we tried to make love...
797
00:43:51,045 --> 00:43:53,172
...and...
798
00:43:53,256 --> 00:43:55,299
I found that I couldn't.
799
00:43:55,383 --> 00:43:58,469
For years after Afghanistan,
800
00:43:58,553 --> 00:44:02,181
I had thought
the problem was my wife.
801
00:44:02,265 --> 00:44:04,392
But then, all of a sudden,
it was clear.
802
00:44:05,643 --> 00:44:08,104
The problem had been me
all along.
803
00:44:10,398 --> 00:44:13,943
My fate was sealed.
804
00:44:14,026 --> 00:44:17,947
I would never be the man
I was before the war.
805
00:44:18,030 --> 00:44:20,283
And I was never going
to be enough for Alison
806
00:44:20,366 --> 00:44:22,618
or any woman.
807
00:44:22,702 --> 00:44:24,412
So you killed her?
808
00:44:26,956 --> 00:44:30,126
I never felt such rage.
809
00:44:30,209 --> 00:44:31,752
And because Alison
was in front of me,
810
00:44:31,836 --> 00:44:34,255
I‐I directed it at her.
811
00:44:34,881 --> 00:44:38,217
She said she was leaving.
812
00:44:38,301 --> 00:44:40,720
She ran to the door.
813
00:44:40,803 --> 00:44:44,223
And I didn't want her to go,
so I grabbed her by the arm
814
00:44:44,307 --> 00:44:48,227
to try to bring her back,
815
00:44:48,311 --> 00:44:53,065
and I lost my grip,
and she fell, hard,
816
00:44:53,149 --> 00:44:55,818
against the bookshelf.
817
00:44:57,570 --> 00:45:01,199
Before I could reach her,
this statue, a heavy statue,
818
00:45:01,282 --> 00:45:03,868
it fell on her head.
819
00:45:05,745 --> 00:45:08,706
And she was gone.
820
00:45:10,416 --> 00:45:13,711
So... it was an accident?
821
00:45:13,794 --> 00:45:16,547
Yes, of course.
822
00:45:16,631 --> 00:45:19,759
I never wanted
to hurt your mother.
823
00:45:32,855 --> 00:45:36,609
I have... I have tried...
824
00:45:36,692 --> 00:45:40,029
to find a way to make
what I did bearable.
825
00:45:40,112 --> 00:45:44,408
I have dedicated
the last 30 years of my life
826
00:45:44,492 --> 00:45:48,871
creating this place:
a safe haven for veterans.
827
00:45:51,624 --> 00:45:55,336
So nobody again
will ever lose control
828
00:45:55,419 --> 00:45:58,506
the way I did.
829
00:45:58,589 --> 00:46:01,884
Hurt someone the way
I hurt your mother.
830
00:46:01,968 --> 00:46:04,303
You didn't just hurt her.
831
00:46:04,387 --> 00:46:08,057
You killed her.
832
00:46:08,140 --> 00:46:10,851
Yes, and I'm sorry, Joanie.
833
00:46:12,728 --> 00:46:15,648
If you're so sorry, then why
didn't you turn yourself in?
834
00:46:15,731 --> 00:46:18,901
I‐I don't know what good
it would have done.
835
00:46:23,197 --> 00:46:27,451
I‐I‐I could help more people...
836
00:46:27,535 --> 00:46:31,289
make more amends by being
of service to these men,
837
00:46:31,372 --> 00:46:34,333
rather than waste
the rest of my life
838
00:46:34,417 --> 00:46:37,086
rotting away in some cell.
839
00:46:37,169 --> 00:46:39,839
Don't you think you should have
let a jury make that call?
840
00:46:40,923 --> 00:46:44,218
Y‐You know who I think
should make that call?
841
00:46:46,137 --> 00:46:47,054
You.
842
00:46:47,138 --> 00:46:50,808
Me?
843
00:46:51,934 --> 00:46:55,813
I promised myself
a long time ago, Joanie,
844
00:46:55,896 --> 00:46:58,566
that when you found me‐‐
845
00:46:58,649 --> 00:47:03,279
and I knew it was a "when,"
not an "if"‐‐
846
00:47:03,362 --> 00:47:04,238
that I would submit
847
00:47:04,322 --> 00:47:08,993
to whatever accountability
you demanded,
848
00:47:09,076 --> 00:47:12,246
and I‐I‐I would not resist.
849
00:47:13,289 --> 00:47:14,874
So...
850
00:47:14,957 --> 00:47:19,253
if you want to call
the police right now,
851
00:47:19,337 --> 00:47:20,137
I'll give you my phone.
852
00:47:23,632 --> 00:47:27,678
If you want to...
you want to kill me...
853
00:47:29,597 --> 00:47:32,183
...I'll give you my gun.
854
00:47:32,266 --> 00:47:33,976
I am completely in your hands.
855
00:47:41,650 --> 00:47:45,404
If I were going to kill you,
856
00:47:45,488 --> 00:47:48,616
I wouldn't use a gun.
857
00:47:48,699 --> 00:47:50,910
It's too quick.
858
00:47:50,993 --> 00:47:52,411
Okay.
859
00:47:52,495 --> 00:47:55,414
How would you do it?
860
00:47:55,498 --> 00:47:57,750
I'd like to cut off your dick
861
00:47:57,833 --> 00:48:02,713
and let you bleed out
like a pig until you die.
862
00:48:05,341 --> 00:48:09,887
Well... that's an option, too.
863
00:48:13,140 --> 00:48:15,101
I have to go.
I need to think.
864
00:48:15,184 --> 00:48:16,852
Okay, but, Joanie,
865
00:48:16,936 --> 00:48:19,271
you know where to find me now.
866
00:48:19,355 --> 00:48:21,440
And I'm not gonna run.
867
00:48:23,192 --> 00:48:27,154
I'll be right here
whenever you decide.
868
00:48:27,238 --> 00:48:28,948
I have to go.
869
00:48:38,499 --> 00:48:40,459
So, what are you gonna do?
870
00:48:40,543 --> 00:48:41,961
I don't know.
871
00:48:42,044 --> 00:48:45,172
How about calling the police?
872
00:48:45,256 --> 00:48:47,133
I guess I should?
873
00:48:48,717 --> 00:48:49,969
This man murdered your mother
874
00:48:50,052 --> 00:48:51,470
and then sat there and gave you
875
00:48:51,554 --> 00:48:53,389
a detailed description
of how he did it.
876
00:48:53,472 --> 00:48:56,684
That's a special kind
of psychopath.
877
00:48:56,767 --> 00:48:58,477
He's a lot of things,
but I‐I don't think
878
00:48:58,561 --> 00:49:01,021
he's a psychopath.
879
00:49:03,774 --> 00:49:05,151
What?
880
00:49:05,234 --> 00:49:09,655
He seemed sorry.
881
00:49:09,738 --> 00:49:13,367
Truly sorry.
882
00:49:13,451 --> 00:49:16,328
He spent his entire life
trying to make amends.
883
00:49:16,412 --> 00:49:18,664
Uh, Joanie, most murderers
are sorry for what they did.
884
00:49:18,747 --> 00:49:20,207
They still have to go to prison.
885
00:49:20,291 --> 00:49:22,001
He said I could kill him
if I liked.
886
00:49:22,084 --> 00:49:24,044
I think that would be a mistake.
887
00:49:24,128 --> 00:49:25,171
I wasn't being serious.
888
00:49:25,254 --> 00:49:26,213
‐Yes, you were.
‐No, I wasn't.
889
00:49:26,297 --> 00:49:27,339
I think you were.
890
00:49:27,423 --> 00:49:30,259
‐EJ.
‐Joanie, listen to me.
891
00:49:30,342 --> 00:49:31,844
This problem is
above your pay grade.
892
00:49:31,927 --> 00:49:33,304
There are people who specialize
893
00:49:33,387 --> 00:49:35,264
in crime and punishment
for a living.
894
00:49:35,347 --> 00:49:36,891
That's why they're called
the authorities.
895
00:49:36,974 --> 00:49:38,017
How about we let them
decide what to do
896
00:49:38,100 --> 00:49:41,395
before we take vengeance
into our own hands.
897
00:49:41,479 --> 00:49:45,191
Ben may be sorry, but he was
clearheaded enough at the time
898
00:49:45,274 --> 00:49:47,026
to use your mother's history
of mental illness against her
899
00:49:47,109 --> 00:49:50,404
and make everyone believe
she drowned herself.
900
00:49:55,284 --> 00:49:57,161
That's right.
901
00:49:57,661 --> 00:50:01,373
She drowned.
902
00:50:01,457 --> 00:50:04,126
They found water in her lungs.
903
00:50:35,491 --> 00:50:36,992
Benjamin Cruz?
904
00:50:37,076 --> 00:50:39,245
Can I help you?
905
00:50:39,328 --> 00:50:41,580
I'm Detective Clark,
this is Detective Woods.
906
00:50:41,664 --> 00:50:42,581
We'd like to ask you
a few questions
907
00:50:42,665 --> 00:50:44,625
pertaining to the death
of Alison Bailey.
908
00:50:44,708 --> 00:50:45,709
May we come in?
909
00:50:45,793 --> 00:50:48,212
I've made my decision.
910
00:50:51,173 --> 00:50:52,591
Where did you find her?
911
00:50:54,176 --> 00:50:56,345
She's one of the patients
from my facility.
912
00:50:56,428 --> 00:51:00,724
She went AWOL last night...
and we've been worried sick.
913
00:51:00,808 --> 00:51:03,310
What?
914
00:51:03,394 --> 00:51:05,145
This is her signature,
committing herself
915
00:51:05,229 --> 00:51:07,147
‐to psychiatric care.
‐What?
916
00:51:07,231 --> 00:51:08,899
And this is my case study
for Joanie Lockhart.
917
00:51:08,983 --> 00:51:11,277
She was admitted
three weeks ago.
918
00:51:11,360 --> 00:51:12,444
That's not true.
None of this is true.
919
00:51:12,528 --> 00:51:14,363
Joanie suffers from severe
depression and PTSD.
920
00:51:14,446 --> 00:51:15,948
Her mother tragically
committed suicide
921
00:51:16,031 --> 00:51:18,158
when she was seven years old.
922
00:51:18,242 --> 00:51:21,412
And lately she's been
experiencing homicidal
923
00:51:21,495 --> 00:51:22,496
fantasies and delusions.
924
00:51:22,580 --> 00:51:23,998
‐This is all horseshit.
‐We have been exploring
925
00:51:24,081 --> 00:51:27,001
some of them in a safe,
therapeutic space,
926
00:51:27,084 --> 00:51:29,795
but, um, yesterday
she had a turn for the worse
927
00:51:29,878 --> 00:51:32,881
and she threatened my life.
928
00:51:35,551 --> 00:51:37,303
I'd like to cut off your dick
929
00:51:37,386 --> 00:51:40,806
and let you bleed out
like a pig until you die.
930
00:51:40,889 --> 00:51:42,141
That is not what I said.
931
00:51:42,224 --> 00:51:44,268
That isn't your voice
on the recording?
932
00:51:44,351 --> 00:51:45,978
Of course it is, but it was
meant as a hypothetical,
933
00:51:46,061 --> 00:51:48,314
like... if I were to kill him.
934
00:51:51,442 --> 00:51:54,028
He knew my mother. He isn't just
a random doctor I came to see.
935
00:51:54,111 --> 00:51:57,531
He was dating her when she died.
936
00:51:57,615 --> 00:51:59,658
He told me that he set up
this whole clinic
937
00:51:59,742 --> 00:52:02,411
because he felt like such a shit
for what he did 30 years ago.
938
00:52:02,494 --> 00:52:03,829
Officers,
I have nothing to hide.
939
00:52:03,912 --> 00:52:06,373
I was cleared of any wrongdoing
940
00:52:06,457 --> 00:52:08,375
in Alison Bailey's death
years ago.
941
00:52:08,459 --> 00:52:10,711
The police ruled it
as a suicide.
942
00:52:10,794 --> 00:52:11,879
Joanie just can't accept it.
943
00:52:11,962 --> 00:52:15,341
She needs someone to blame.
944
00:52:15,424 --> 00:52:20,346
She herself has made
a series of suicide attempts,
945
00:52:20,429 --> 00:52:23,891
as you can see referenced
on pages five and six.
946
00:52:25,392 --> 00:52:28,312
Ms. Lockhart,
what are you doing?
947
00:52:28,395 --> 00:52:30,397
Where is it, Ben?
948
00:52:30,481 --> 00:52:32,650
‐Where's your fucking gun?
‐There's no gun.
949
00:52:32,733 --> 00:52:34,526
He said I could kill him with it
if I wanted to.
950
00:52:34,610 --> 00:52:35,944
I don't have a gun, Joanie.
951
00:52:36,028 --> 00:52:37,780
I run a therapeutic center
952
00:52:37,863 --> 00:52:40,032
for PTSD recovery.
953
00:52:40,115 --> 00:52:42,701
A gun would be
a very dangerous thing
954
00:52:42,785 --> 00:52:45,371
to have on these premises,
wouldn't it?
955
00:52:45,454 --> 00:52:47,164
Ms. Lockhart,
is it true what he's saying?
956
00:52:47,247 --> 00:52:49,875
Are you a patient
at this facility?
957
00:52:49,958 --> 00:52:52,711
- ‐No, of course not.
- ‐ All right, but...
958
00:52:52,795 --> 00:52:54,213
this is your signature
on this form?
959
00:52:54,296 --> 00:52:57,049
I wasn't paying attention
to what I was signing.
960
00:52:57,132 --> 00:53:00,219
So you didn't read
what the form said?
961
00:53:00,302 --> 00:53:02,388
You aren't listening to me.
962
00:53:02,471 --> 00:53:04,390
I'm telling the truth.
963
00:53:04,473 --> 00:53:05,273
I'm not the crazy one.
964
00:53:05,349 --> 00:53:08,268
‐He is.
‐Okay, well, why would you sign
965
00:53:08,352 --> 00:53:09,728
something you didn't read,
ma'am?
966
00:53:09,812 --> 00:53:10,896
Because I was too busy
thinking about
967
00:53:10,979 --> 00:53:11,779
how I was gonna kill him.
968
00:53:14,650 --> 00:53:16,610
Mr. Cruz, do you want us
969
00:53:16,694 --> 00:53:18,404
to remove Ms. Lockhart
from the property?
970
00:53:18,487 --> 00:53:20,447
That won't be necessary.
971
00:53:20,531 --> 00:53:22,199
Are you sure, sir?
972
00:53:22,282 --> 00:53:25,411
More than anything, right now,
she needs my support.
973
00:53:25,494 --> 00:53:28,247
Sorry to have wasted
your time, Officers.
974
00:53:28,330 --> 00:53:29,498
Okay.
975
00:53:41,385 --> 00:53:44,596
I'm gonna fucking kill you.
976
00:53:44,680 --> 00:53:46,932
You can't touch me now, Joanie.
977
00:53:47,015 --> 00:53:51,061
Police are watching you now.
978
00:53:51,145 --> 00:53:53,856
You'll go to prison
for the rest of your life.
979
00:53:53,939 --> 00:53:56,316
Your kids will grow up
without a mother.
980
00:53:56,400 --> 00:53:58,402
That's not what you want, is it?
981
00:53:58,485 --> 00:54:00,612
What do you know about my kids?
982
00:54:00,696 --> 00:54:01,864
I meant what I said.
983
00:54:01,947 --> 00:54:06,452
I thought about you over the
years, wondered how you were.
984
00:54:06,535 --> 00:54:08,954
Were you watching me?
985
00:54:09,037 --> 00:54:11,123
I looked you up online.
986
00:54:11,206 --> 00:54:12,124
When did you know it was me?
987
00:54:12,207 --> 00:54:15,961
When you took off
your sunglasses.
988
00:54:16,044 --> 00:54:17,504
Why didn't you say
something then?
989
00:54:17,588 --> 00:54:20,132
What was the point
of this whole exercise?
990
00:54:23,719 --> 00:54:25,763
My mother was still breathing
991
00:54:25,846 --> 00:54:28,182
when her body
went into the water.
992
00:54:28,265 --> 00:54:30,434
She didn't die in our apartment
like you said she did.
993
00:54:30,517 --> 00:54:32,644
She had water in her lungs.
994
00:54:32,728 --> 00:54:34,480
She fucking drowned.
995
00:54:34,563 --> 00:54:35,272
Calm down.
996
00:54:35,355 --> 00:54:38,358
Can I get you something?
A drink?
997
00:54:38,442 --> 00:54:40,152
You wanted me
to call the police.
998
00:54:40,235 --> 00:54:41,487
So you could show them
my signature
999
00:54:41,570 --> 00:54:45,782
and play them the tape
and make me seem like a nutjob.
1000
00:54:45,866 --> 00:54:49,161
The one person left alive
who knows what you did.
1001
00:54:49,244 --> 00:54:50,496
You killed her, and then you
dumped her body in the water.
1002
00:54:50,579 --> 00:54:53,749
You made it look like a suicide.
You used her history
1003
00:54:53,832 --> 00:54:57,127
and you set her up just like you
set me up, didn't you?
1004
00:54:59,004 --> 00:55:00,088
Yes.
1005
00:55:00,172 --> 00:55:02,299
Why?
1006
00:55:02,382 --> 00:55:03,717
I didn't want to go to prison.
1007
00:55:03,800 --> 00:55:06,011
Oh, you're a killer.
You belong in prison.
1008
00:55:06,094 --> 00:55:08,722
Oh, thou shall not kill.
1009
00:55:08,805 --> 00:55:12,309
Well... except sometimes.
1010
00:55:12,392 --> 00:55:14,186
I killed people in Afghanistan,
plenty of them.
1011
00:55:14,269 --> 00:55:17,814
Some of them innocent civilians.
1012
00:55:19,149 --> 00:55:21,193
It wasn't a crime there.
1013
00:55:21,276 --> 00:55:23,529
Why should it be a crime here?
1014
00:55:24,738 --> 00:55:28,158
You took my mother from me.
1015
00:55:30,035 --> 00:55:31,495
I was a child.
1016
00:55:34,456 --> 00:55:35,541
You took her.
1017
00:55:41,571 --> 00:55:42,371
You know,
1018
00:55:42,381 --> 00:55:45,884
you are just so much like her.
1019
00:55:45,968 --> 00:55:47,886
When you showed up at my door,
1020
00:55:47,970 --> 00:55:52,099
you seemed so...
strong, so tough.
1021
00:55:53,267 --> 00:55:56,270
I should have known
it was a mask.
1022
00:55:56,353 --> 00:55:58,063
Just like hers.
1023
00:55:58,146 --> 00:55:59,189
You're just as sad
1024
00:55:59,273 --> 00:56:01,817
and as frightened as she was.
1025
00:56:21,003 --> 00:56:22,963
Harder.
1026
00:56:23,046 --> 00:56:24,673
Harder.
1027
00:56:24,756 --> 00:56:27,593
Oh.
1028
00:56:29,428 --> 00:56:34,266
I understand
why you came here now.
1029
00:56:34,349 --> 00:56:37,394
It wasn't for Alison at all.
1030
00:56:38,895 --> 00:56:42,774
You just want someone
to put you out of your pain.
1031
00:56:46,820 --> 00:56:50,490
I'm not gonna do you that favor.
1032
00:56:56,288 --> 00:56:59,791
I'm sorry for your pain, Joanie.
1033
00:56:59,875 --> 00:57:02,753
I really am.
1034
00:57:04,671 --> 00:57:07,966
But if I go away,
1035
00:57:08,050 --> 00:57:10,802
what happens to these patients?
1036
00:57:10,886 --> 00:57:12,763
They need me here.
1037
00:57:12,846 --> 00:57:16,642
You are so full of shit,
and you know it.
1038
00:57:16,725 --> 00:57:18,602
I've paid for my sins.
1039
00:57:20,270 --> 00:57:23,982
I can live with myself.
1040
00:57:28,695 --> 00:57:31,865
You're the one, apparently,
1041
00:57:31,948 --> 00:57:34,076
who cannot.