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Previously on
"Mom"...
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I was thinking I could stay
3
00:00:02,695 --> 00:00:04,455
an extra night
for the express purpose of
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taking you out.
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00:00:05,664 --> 00:00:07,127
- I'd really like that.
- Oh, great.
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Are you kidding me?
You can't go out with Adam's brother.
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00:00:10,041 --> 00:00:12,860
And yet I've got my good bra on
and I'm headed out the door.
8
00:00:12,947 --> 00:00:15,149
Yeah, but I actually
have to get back home tomorrow.
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00:00:15,408 --> 00:00:16,862
I'm gonna miss you.
10
00:00:17,221 --> 00:00:20,026
You think we should try
the long-distance thing?
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00:00:20,172 --> 00:00:21,776
I'm game.
12
00:00:23,393 --> 00:00:25,705
But while I've got you here...
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You ready for
your coffee, babe?
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No, thanks.
15
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Starting today,
I am giving it up.
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Seriously?
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Coffee is your only
source of water.
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When did water
become such a big thing?
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Isn't it enough
that I bathe in it?
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Where did all this come from?
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I read it on Facebook.
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"Five Things You Should Give Up
for a Happier Life."
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Was number one Facebook?
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Hey, how come you guys
didn't wake me up for school?
25
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'Cause you're not seven.
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I wish I was.
I liked living alone.
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00:01:02,424 --> 00:01:03,635
You want a bagel?
28
00:01:03,791 --> 00:01:05,533
Thanks, but all I need
is coffee.
29
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How sad to be so dependent.
I remember those days.
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She gave up coffee
30 seconds ago.
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Good for you.
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You're a dead man.
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She's just kidding.
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Help me.
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Oh, damn.
36
00:01:22,516 --> 00:01:24,618
I just missed another
phone call from Patrick.
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How does this happen?
I was holding my phone in my hand.
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Why do you hate love?
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Why don't you stop
playing phone tag
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and just drive down
to Santa Cruz to see him?
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When? We have
totally opposite schedules.
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Relationships are torture.
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Like waterboarding with sex.
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That's the sort of comment
that used to bother me
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when I was under the thumb
of the brown God.
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This long-distance thing
is just so frustrating.
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I'm not sure Patrick and
I can make it work.
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For what it's worth,
I hope you guys figure it out.
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Oh, my God,
I just missed his call again!
50
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How, how, how?!
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00:02:08,945 --> 00:02:10,259
I'll see ya later.
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Boy, I do not miss dating,
you know what I mean?
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Take a sip of your coffee
and kiss me.
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Hey, Patrick, sorry I missed
your call, yet again.
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I dropped my phone
in the fountain
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in front of the library.
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I was making a wish.
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Actually, I was wishing
you would call me.
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Ironic, right?
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Is it ironic?
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That's a word I should
probably stay away from
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until I figure out
what it really means.
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Anyway, my phone
still works, so...
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hit me back, as the kids say.
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Yikes.
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Oh, by the way, this is Christy.
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Who should've stopped
at "Sorry I missed your call."
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Excuse me.
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Don't I know you from
that time we slept together?
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Hi, Cooper.
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Sorry, I've been meaning
to catch up with you.
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Oh, now's your chance.
You mind if I sit?
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Kind of a bad time;
I-I really got to study.
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Got it. I won't say a word.
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Mm.
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Mm.
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"Bonjour.
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You are the hottest girl
in the student center."
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Cooper, seriously?
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It's not me.
He has a mind of his own.
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"And I cannot
get you off of it."
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Very funny.
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"I am not trying to be funny,
I am trying to be sexy.
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Hon, hon, hon."
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By being lame?
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"Oh, that depends.
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Is it working,
mon petit ketchup packet?"
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"That was fantastique."
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It worked; knock it off.
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♪♪
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♪♪
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♪♪
*MOM*
Season 05 Episode 10
Title: "A Bear and a Bladder Infection"
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♪♪
Synchronized by srjanapala
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♪♪
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Hey.
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Oh, geez,
you scared me!
97
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I thought you gave up coffee.
98
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My head is pounding,
my colon's in gridlock,
99
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and I winged a butter plate at
Adam, so I'm back on the bean.
100
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Yeah, yeah, good for you.
101
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I had sex with Cooper.
102
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I'm sorry, what?
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I know. I feel so guilty.
104
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Why?
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Because I'm seeing someone.
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Patrick? Oh, come on,
you haven't even slept with him.
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Believe me, I want to,
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but our genitals are never
in the same ZIP Code.
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And that's not gonna change
anytime soon,
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so you're free to do
whatever you want.
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It's like prison.
Nobody's married, nobody's gay.
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Whoa, Mom.
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You actually made me
feel better.
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Thank you.
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You act like it's the first...
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You're welcome.
117
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Ugh, please
don't tell Adam.
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Why would I tell him
you're cheating on his brother?
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He would see it that way.
I don't. Keep hugging.
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Ah...
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You never know how much you love
something until you give it up.
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You realize you're talking
to a table full of addicts?
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I don't see the connection.
124
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So, Christy,
I'm confused.
125
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At your age,
it's only gonna get worse.
126
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Are you and Cooper dating again?
127
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No. It was just
a one-time thing.
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Well, a two-time thing.
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I swung by on the way over here.
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Oh, look at you having it all.
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If you get a bladder infection,
I'm gonna be so proud.
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So you like this boy.
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No, I like Patrick.
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I'm just having fun with Cooper.
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Be careful, with your bladder
and your heart.
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I'm fine.
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Guys do this stuff all the time.
Why can't I?
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Because you can't be intimate
without getting attached.
139
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Just 'cause I'm sober?
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No, because you're you.
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I can do it, Bonnie can do it...
142
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Can do it blindfolded, and have.
143
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I'm doing it right now.
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He's an anesthesiologist.
I feel nothing.
145
00:06:39,765 --> 00:06:41,828
I'm sure
he doesn't either.
146
00:06:48,631 --> 00:06:50,927
Where you headed?
Cooper's.
147
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Dressed like that?
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00:06:52,468 --> 00:06:53,950
That's the beauty
of this thing.
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It requires
virtually no effort.
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I text two words:
"You up?"
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00:06:59,071 --> 00:07:00,966
And bam, it's on.
152
00:07:01,531 --> 00:07:05,859
One time it auto-corrected to
"Soup?" but it still happened.
153
00:07:07,703 --> 00:07:09,258
Hey, where you off to?
154
00:07:10,062 --> 00:07:12,148
Uh... to the store.
155
00:07:12,476 --> 00:07:15,320
Not the close one, the one
across town with the olive bar.
156
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God, I love olives.
157
00:07:18,208 --> 00:07:20,234
Anyway, I might be a while.
158
00:07:20,359 --> 00:07:22,172
Would you mind
picking up some coffee?
159
00:07:22,265 --> 00:07:25,054
Your mom's blowing through
a bag a day.
160
00:07:27,202 --> 00:07:28,765
- Sure.
- Well, as long as
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00:07:28,833 --> 00:07:31,640
you're going... to the store...
162
00:07:33,187 --> 00:07:35,922
could you pick up some soup?
163
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Everybody loves
a nice, hot, sexy bowl of soup.
164
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Yeah, soup would be great.
165
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Got it.
166
00:07:47,503 --> 00:07:49,424
Coffee and soup.
167
00:07:50,526 --> 00:07:51,598
She's the best.
168
00:07:51,666 --> 00:07:53,726
My brother does
not deserve her.
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00:07:53,731 --> 00:07:54,737
Aw, that's sweet.
170
00:07:54,805 --> 00:07:57,119
You should've told her that
before she left.
171
00:08:03,885 --> 00:08:05,658
Oh, my God, it gets better
every time.
172
00:08:06,556 --> 00:08:08,104
Sure does.
173
00:08:08,191 --> 00:08:09,392
I got to go.
174
00:08:09,460 --> 00:08:10,940
Wait. Wait.
175
00:08:11,072 --> 00:08:13,721
Why are you always in
such a hurry to leave?
176
00:08:13,963 --> 00:08:16,643
Well, I'm busy, you're busy.
177
00:08:16,711 --> 00:08:17,938
Busy, busy, busy.
178
00:08:18,006 --> 00:08:21,072
Yeah, but this is
working, right?
179
00:08:21,822 --> 00:08:23,072
Works for me.
180
00:08:23,251 --> 00:08:24,536
I'm free Tuesday at 5:00,
181
00:08:24,604 --> 00:08:26,786
as long as I'm back
in my car by 20 after.
182
00:08:26,854 --> 00:08:28,510
Christy, come on.
183
00:08:28,916 --> 00:08:31,314
This isn't just
hooking up anymore.
184
00:08:32,291 --> 00:08:33,421
It isn't?
185
00:08:33,523 --> 00:08:34,684
No.
186
00:08:34,752 --> 00:08:38,154
I am totally
falling in love with you.
187
00:08:45,979 --> 00:08:47,533
Yup.
188
00:08:47,601 --> 00:08:51,705
♪ Falling in
love with you. ♪
189
00:08:53,260 --> 00:08:55,487
But you're
a 24-year-old guy.
190
00:08:55,858 --> 00:08:58,572
24-year-old guys
don't fall in love.
191
00:08:58,760 --> 00:09:00,835
My mom says
I'm an old soul.
192
00:09:01,713 --> 00:09:05,019
Well, I am
a much older soul.
193
00:09:05,290 --> 00:09:07,651
And I have a lot of baggage.
194
00:09:07,719 --> 00:09:09,454
Lots and lots of baggage.
195
00:09:09,764 --> 00:09:12,313
Then let me help
you carry it.
196
00:09:12,954 --> 00:09:14,729
Holy cow.
197
00:09:16,851 --> 00:09:22,056
Cooper, look, I just don't have
the same feelings for you.
198
00:09:23,479 --> 00:09:25,272
Oh.
199
00:09:25,385 --> 00:09:26,862
Well, now I'm a
little embarrassed.
200
00:09:26,930 --> 00:09:29,612
I booped your nose
and everything.
201
00:09:30,260 --> 00:09:32,780
I thought we were just
gonna keep it casual,
202
00:09:32,867 --> 00:09:34,627
you know,
having a good time.
203
00:09:35,065 --> 00:09:36,697
You mean just sex?
204
00:09:36,842 --> 00:09:38,487
Exactly.
205
00:09:38,685 --> 00:09:41,487
I assumed we were
on the same page.
206
00:09:42,221 --> 00:09:44,362
Well, we were not.
207
00:09:49,233 --> 00:09:54,283
So, just to be clear,
Tuesday at 5:00 not happening?
208
00:09:58,493 --> 00:10:00,661
Bonnie, Bonnie,
wake up. Bonnie.
209
00:10:01,408 --> 00:10:02,409
It's sleepy time.
210
00:10:02,496 --> 00:10:04,338
I'll throw you one
in the morning.
211
00:10:04,585 --> 00:10:06,299
Bonnie. Bonnie.
212
00:10:06,367 --> 00:10:09,690
Okay, fine, but it's not
gonna be the Fourth of July.
213
00:10:09,877 --> 00:10:11,197
I don't want to have sex.
214
00:10:11,265 --> 00:10:13,326
Why not?
What's wrong with me?
215
00:10:13,507 --> 00:10:16,110
I'm worried about Christy;
she never came home from the store.
216
00:10:16,299 --> 00:10:17,354
Oh.
217
00:10:17,422 --> 00:10:18,440
Yeah.
218
00:10:19,478 --> 00:10:21,307
Well, she takes forever.
219
00:10:21,452 --> 00:10:25,283
She walks down every aisle,
she talks to people,
220
00:10:25,351 --> 00:10:26,877
then she has to find
someone tall
221
00:10:26,945 --> 00:10:29,612
to get stuff off the top shelf.
It's a circus.
222
00:10:30,084 --> 00:10:32,478
Why am I more worried
about your kid than you are?
223
00:10:32,546 --> 00:10:35,690
God, now you sound like
the lady from Child Services.
224
00:10:36,497 --> 00:10:39,051
What if she got in an accident?
I think you're overreacting.
225
00:10:39,119 --> 00:10:41,058
I think you're underreacting.
I'm gonna call the police.
226
00:10:41,125 --> 00:10:42,487
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
227
00:10:42,631 --> 00:10:45,877
Plunkett family rule number one:
no cops, ever.
228
00:10:46,290 --> 00:10:47,783
What is wrong with you?
229
00:10:48,009 --> 00:10:50,044
You know what? You're right.
230
00:10:50,112 --> 00:10:51,572
I'm gonna text her.
231
00:10:52,413 --> 00:10:54,799
Oh.
She actually texted me.
232
00:10:56,450 --> 00:10:59,635
Uh, "Ran into Wendy.
She's having a crisis.
233
00:10:59,776 --> 00:11:01,510
What else is new?
Be home late."
234
00:11:01,578 --> 00:11:04,681
Huh. Well, that made me horny.
How 'bout you?
235
00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:14,791
Oh, hey, you're still up.
236
00:11:14,947 --> 00:11:16,904
Yeah. How's Wendy?
237
00:11:16,991 --> 00:11:18,057
Wendy?
238
00:11:18,159 --> 00:11:20,463
Yeah, your mom said
she was having a crisis.
239
00:11:21,065 --> 00:11:23,577
Oh, yes. Wendy's crisis.
240
00:11:24,312 --> 00:11:25,749
So bad.
241
00:11:26,059 --> 00:11:29,252
We ate your soup
and drank your coffee.
242
00:11:33,408 --> 00:11:35,435
Sorry to hear that.
What's wrong?
243
00:11:35,522 --> 00:11:37,805
Ugh, I can't really
talk about it.
244
00:11:38,049 --> 00:11:40,010
It's an A.A. thing.
It's a lady thing.
245
00:11:40,084 --> 00:11:41,932
It's an A.A. lady thing.
246
00:11:42,183 --> 00:11:43,291
Got it.
247
00:11:43,583 --> 00:11:45,627
Well, glad you
made it home safe.
248
00:11:45,695 --> 00:11:47,041
I was a little worried.
249
00:11:47,915 --> 00:11:49,307
Oh.
250
00:11:49,734 --> 00:11:50,994
Thanks.
251
00:11:51,337 --> 00:11:52,631
Night.
252
00:11:52,728 --> 00:11:53,842
Night.
253
00:11:56,610 --> 00:11:58,245
Oh, damn it.
254
00:12:03,432 --> 00:12:04,972
Adam, I lied.
255
00:12:05,439 --> 00:12:07,307
I wasn't with Wendy.
256
00:12:07,503 --> 00:12:09,238
I was with a guy.
257
00:12:09,885 --> 00:12:11,138
A guy?
258
00:12:11,572 --> 00:12:13,928
A guy who isn't your brother.
259
00:12:14,846 --> 00:12:16,276
Oh.
260
00:12:18,615 --> 00:12:21,026
Yeah, I've been seeing Patrick,
261
00:12:21,122 --> 00:12:24,854
but I've also been
doing this other thing, and...
262
00:12:27,690 --> 00:12:29,911
I guess
I'm kind of embarrassed.
263
00:12:30,682 --> 00:12:32,127
Okay.
264
00:12:33,204 --> 00:12:37,049
Well, um, not proud of it,
but...
265
00:12:38,167 --> 00:12:40,737
there's a part of me that's...
266
00:12:41,223 --> 00:12:44,119
kind of laughing at my brother
right now.
267
00:12:44,991 --> 00:12:48,330
Tempted to call him up
and rub his nose in it.
268
00:12:48,749 --> 00:12:49,838
You can't.
269
00:12:49,922 --> 00:12:51,090
I won't. I-I won't.
270
00:12:51,263 --> 00:12:53,578
Good, 'cause I really like him.
271
00:12:56,791 --> 00:12:58,318
I made a mess, didn't I?
272
00:12:58,405 --> 00:13:01,088
Like a dog after he ate
a can of chili.
273
00:13:01,494 --> 00:13:03,057
My dog did that once.
274
00:13:03,144 --> 00:13:05,119
We had to burn
the carpet...
275
00:13:09,838 --> 00:13:11,885
I hope you don't think
less of me.
276
00:13:13,470 --> 00:13:17,054
Christy, your life is your life,
but I got to tell you,
277
00:13:17,142 --> 00:13:19,947
all this lying and
sneaking around,
278
00:13:20,080 --> 00:13:21,244
it doesn't
sound like you.
279
00:13:21,312 --> 00:13:22,479
Sounds more
like your mom.
280
00:13:22,705 --> 00:13:25,924
Oh, my God, that's the
worst thing you could say.
281
00:13:27,260 --> 00:13:30,010
I'm sorry. I just mean
you're better than she is.
282
00:13:31,236 --> 00:13:33,377
She knows. I told her.
283
00:13:35,025 --> 00:13:36,590
So...
284
00:13:37,236 --> 00:13:39,932
who is this guy
who's not my brother?
285
00:13:41,369 --> 00:13:43,174
Just someone
from school.
286
00:13:43,550 --> 00:13:45,736
It was supposed
to be casual.
287
00:13:45,951 --> 00:13:47,940
My attempt
at being a dude.
288
00:13:48,155 --> 00:13:51,260
But then he went and screwed it
up by having feelings for me.
289
00:13:51,479 --> 00:13:53,768
Hold on. Did you set
up the ground rules?
290
00:13:53,971 --> 00:13:56,363
No, I just assumed
we were on the same page.
291
00:13:56,450 --> 00:13:57,731
Ooh, rookie mistake.
292
00:13:59,252 --> 00:14:01,080
Listen, if you're
gonna act like a dude,
293
00:14:01,158 --> 00:14:02,185
you got to set
up the rules.
294
00:14:02,252 --> 00:14:05,385
You got to say things like
"I'm not looking for a relationship,
295
00:14:05,472 --> 00:14:06,979
"I'm not built for
a relationship,
296
00:14:07,047 --> 00:14:10,213
I'm not a relationship kind of
guy," that type of nonsense.
297
00:14:10,986 --> 00:14:13,210
Oh, you're right.
298
00:14:13,342 --> 00:14:15,390
Guys do say that.
299
00:14:15,744 --> 00:14:17,769
Guess I never really heard it
because at that point
300
00:14:17,837 --> 00:14:19,637
I'm always thinking,
"I can change you,
301
00:14:19,705 --> 00:14:21,174
I can change you,
I can change you."
302
00:14:21,585 --> 00:14:25,486
When will women learn
they can't change men?
303
00:14:26,807 --> 00:14:29,543
Says the man who put a ring
on my mom's finger
304
00:14:29,630 --> 00:14:31,807
and now listens to Adele.
305
00:14:33,861 --> 00:14:35,502
Son of a bitch.
306
00:14:38,510 --> 00:14:40,682
Okay, how does
this sound?
307
00:14:41,104 --> 00:14:42,209
"Dear Cooper..."
308
00:14:42,296 --> 00:14:43,390
Bad.
309
00:14:43,477 --> 00:14:45,979
It's a text,
not a letter from camp.
310
00:14:46,951 --> 00:14:48,346
Don't send anything.
311
00:14:48,876 --> 00:14:50,624
But I need him to forgive me.
312
00:14:50,823 --> 00:14:53,018
How many times have
you apologized?
313
00:14:53,541 --> 00:14:54,823
Four...
314
00:14:55,050 --> 00:14:56,604
teen.
315
00:14:57,292 --> 00:14:59,227
Did you try an
Edible Arrangement?
316
00:14:59,295 --> 00:15:02,790
She's apologizing for
an "edible arrangement."
317
00:15:05,970 --> 00:15:08,517
I am wasted
on all of you.
318
00:15:09,603 --> 00:15:10,684
It's horrible.
319
00:15:10,775 --> 00:15:12,586
I can't eat, can't sleep.
320
00:15:12,728 --> 00:15:14,509
This is what I was
worried about.
321
00:15:14,577 --> 00:15:16,059
You developed feelings.
322
00:15:16,297 --> 00:15:17,626
Oh, I get it.
323
00:15:17,741 --> 00:15:19,759
"Edible."
324
00:15:20,743 --> 00:15:23,478
Cooper developed
the stupid feelings.
325
00:15:23,546 --> 00:15:24,595
I was the dude.
326
00:15:24,663 --> 00:15:26,504
If you were really the dude,
you wouldn't care.
327
00:15:26,572 --> 00:15:27,784
You would ride off
on your motorcycle
328
00:15:27,851 --> 00:15:29,704
and go shoot pool,
maybe a bear.
329
00:15:30,836 --> 00:15:33,214
I'm not even listening
to her anymore.
330
00:15:33,344 --> 00:15:35,345
Honey, you're just gonna
have to live with the fact
331
00:15:35,416 --> 00:15:37,664
that there's somebody out there
who doesn't like you.
332
00:15:37,751 --> 00:15:39,853
"Doesn't like you"?
He hates her guts.
333
00:15:39,921 --> 00:15:41,322
And FYI, he's not alone.
334
00:15:42,572 --> 00:15:43,939
I'm just saying
335
00:15:44,040 --> 00:15:46,431
that it's not fair for you
to continue hurting him
336
00:15:46,499 --> 00:15:48,611
just to make yourself
feel better.
337
00:15:49,356 --> 00:15:50,938
She's so wise.
338
00:15:51,112 --> 00:15:53,547
And yet she thought
a purple velour tracksuit
339
00:15:53,634 --> 00:15:54,908
was a good idea.
340
00:15:56,462 --> 00:15:57,462
Fine.
341
00:15:57,743 --> 00:15:59,120
I'll leave Cooper alone.
342
00:15:59,207 --> 00:16:00,234
Good.
343
00:16:00,908 --> 00:16:02,502
Now, who else hates me?
344
00:16:02,589 --> 00:16:04,458
Greg at
the Thursday night meeting.
345
00:16:05,439 --> 00:16:06,706
Who's Greg?
346
00:16:06,835 --> 00:16:08,475
The guy you always call Scott.
347
00:16:09,663 --> 00:16:12,217
Oh, my God, Scott hates me?
348
00:16:35,774 --> 00:16:37,156
Hi.
349
00:16:37,671 --> 00:16:39,952
Oh, God, when do you graduate?
350
00:16:41,639 --> 00:16:44,969
Look, I know I already said
I was sorry,
351
00:16:45,037 --> 00:16:49,187
but I just need you to know
that I'm really, really sorry.
352
00:16:50,170 --> 00:16:51,954
I just don't get it, Christy.
353
00:16:52,022 --> 00:16:54,272
I mean, it would be one thing
if there was another guy.
354
00:16:54,340 --> 00:16:55,835
Ooh, there is!
355
00:16:56,128 --> 00:16:57,829
There's totally another guy.
356
00:16:59,174 --> 00:17:00,174
Does that help?
357
00:17:00,268 --> 00:17:02,460
Not as much as I hoped.
358
00:17:03,186 --> 00:17:06,460
What I mean is if I was
able to actually see him,
359
00:17:06,528 --> 00:17:08,303
I wouldn't have needed you.
360
00:17:09,515 --> 00:17:11,288
Oops, that came out
a little harsh.
361
00:17:11,445 --> 00:17:14,092
Everything you say
comes out a little harsh.
362
00:17:14,741 --> 00:17:17,411
I just mean that
it's a long-distance thing,
363
00:17:17,498 --> 00:17:20,117
and I was frustrated
because it was so complicated
364
00:17:20,185 --> 00:17:21,281
and you were so easy.
365
00:17:21,427 --> 00:17:24,052
Your apology is making me
want to kill myself.
366
00:17:25,450 --> 00:17:26,705
That's not what I want.
367
00:17:26,773 --> 00:17:28,842
Okay, then what do you want?
368
00:17:30,911 --> 00:17:32,810
I guess I want to be
with the other guy.
369
00:17:32,878 --> 00:17:34,075
Then go.
370
00:17:37,138 --> 00:17:40,482
"Okay. Well,
perhaps you will take comfort
371
00:17:40,607 --> 00:17:43,482
"in the fact that I will die
long before you.
372
00:17:45,288 --> 00:17:47,154
Au revoir."
373
00:17:57,451 --> 00:17:58,952
Marjorie said moderation is key,
374
00:17:59,039 --> 00:18:02,469
so I'm just gonna have
one cup of coffee a day.
375
00:18:03,179 --> 00:18:04,794
I can live with that.
376
00:18:06,281 --> 00:18:08,015
You must have been a fun drunk.
377
00:18:08,266 --> 00:18:11,359
I had a small but fervent
cult following.
378
00:18:16,875 --> 00:18:20,080
Wow. Christy's driving down
to Santa Cruz to see Patrick.
379
00:18:20,148 --> 00:18:23,229
She said she's either gonna make
it work or get her heart broken.
380
00:18:23,320 --> 00:18:25,620
I can't believe she's that
crazy about my brother.
381
00:18:25,688 --> 00:18:26,893
He's kind of a tool.
382
00:18:27,711 --> 00:18:29,690
We are so lucky
to have each other.
383
00:18:29,758 --> 00:18:31,823
Yeah, we are.
And, hey, you don't ever
384
00:18:31,891 --> 00:18:33,563
have to worry about
me cheating on you.
385
00:18:33,648 --> 00:18:35,289
I wasn't, but go on.
386
00:18:35,797 --> 00:18:37,223
I mean, juggling girlfriends,
387
00:18:37,291 --> 00:18:40,198
trying to remember which lie
you told who, sneaking around.
388
00:18:40,266 --> 00:18:42,164
Being with you is
so much less trouble.
389
00:18:42,453 --> 00:18:44,611
Look at you,
writing your vows already.
390
00:18:45,430 --> 00:18:46,955
No, no, you know
what I meant.
391
00:18:47,023 --> 00:18:49,102
I do. And you know
if you ever did cheat on me,
392
00:18:49,170 --> 00:18:50,415
I would take the wheels
off your chair
393
00:18:50,482 --> 00:18:52,023
and leave you in the woods.
394
00:18:52,156 --> 00:18:53,570
I do.
395
00:18:56,739 --> 00:18:58,888
It's just kind of wonderful
that Christy's racing
396
00:18:58,956 --> 00:19:02,786
down the highway, wind in her hair,
all in the name of love.
397
00:19:03,507 --> 00:19:05,911
♪ I'm so excited ♪
398
00:19:06,094 --> 00:19:08,880
♪ And I just can't hide it ♪
399
00:19:10,124 --> 00:19:12,661
♪ I know, I know, I know,
I know, I know ♪
400
00:19:12,747 --> 00:19:15,041
♪ I want you, I want you.