1 00:00:00,203 --> 00:00:01,733 Previously on Mom... 2 00:00:01,758 --> 00:00:03,702 I just got a text from my son. 3 00:00:03,727 --> 00:00:05,293 He hasn't spoken to me in years. 4 00:00:05,362 --> 00:00:07,829 I chose booze over my own son. 5 00:00:08,070 --> 00:00:11,181 - Marjorie would love to babysit. - Well, that's too bad. 6 00:00:11,206 --> 00:00:13,040 She's made her choices, and I've made mine. 7 00:00:13,065 --> 00:00:15,205 Jerry decided that he wants his daughter 8 00:00:15,230 --> 00:00:17,031 to have a relationship with her grandma. 9 00:00:17,055 --> 00:00:18,709 _ 10 00:00:18,734 --> 00:00:19,855 - Hey. - Hey. 11 00:00:19,888 --> 00:00:21,221 Your husband's a dick. 12 00:00:22,030 --> 00:00:23,664 Fine. And you? 13 00:00:25,143 --> 00:00:26,342 Out of nowhere, Adam said 14 00:00:26,367 --> 00:00:28,054 I'm not allowed in his office anymore. 15 00:00:28,079 --> 00:00:30,201 Well, he is a little funny about his privacy. 16 00:00:30,226 --> 00:00:32,159 You know I'm not allowed in his jacket pockets? 17 00:00:32,184 --> 00:00:34,117 We're married, and I can't have a Tic Tac? 18 00:00:34,142 --> 00:00:35,656 Hmm. Or a twenty. 19 00:00:35,987 --> 00:00:37,887 I've worked at the bar for over a year. 20 00:00:37,912 --> 00:00:39,912 Obviously, it's 'cause I'm an ex-con. 21 00:00:39,937 --> 00:00:41,336 You want me to talk to him for you? 22 00:00:41,361 --> 00:00:43,695 I'll probably forget, but I'm happy to offer. 23 00:00:43,939 --> 00:00:45,539 I'm just gonna act like I'm over it, 24 00:00:45,564 --> 00:00:47,044 and really resent him behind his back. 25 00:00:47,069 --> 00:00:48,636 - That's what I do. - Mm. 26 00:00:49,577 --> 00:00:52,468 Thank you, Ginny. This is perfect. 27 00:00:52,493 --> 00:00:54,059 What's with the baby bouncer? 28 00:00:54,084 --> 00:00:56,383 Is Majorie treating her cats like people again? 29 00:00:56,632 --> 00:00:59,375 I mean, the stroller was embarrassing enough. 30 00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:01,515 She's babysitting her granddaughter tomorrow. 31 00:01:01,880 --> 00:01:03,079 That's huge! 32 00:01:03,104 --> 00:01:04,603 How come nobody told me? 33 00:01:04,628 --> 00:01:07,070 She did tell you. She told all of us. 34 00:01:07,257 --> 00:01:09,729 Yeah, we talked about it for most of lunch the other day. 35 00:01:09,754 --> 00:01:11,487 Well, I must've been in the bathroom. 36 00:01:11,512 --> 00:01:14,921 No, you were there, and engaged in the conversation. 37 00:01:15,093 --> 00:01:16,993 - Really? - Yeah, you told her you didn't think 38 00:01:17,018 --> 00:01:18,217 she was ready for it. 39 00:01:18,242 --> 00:01:19,951 Then you ate my fries, and told Wendy 40 00:01:19,976 --> 00:01:22,298 her blouse was sadder than The Notebook. 41 00:01:23,006 --> 00:01:25,078 Oh. That sounds like me. 42 00:01:25,103 --> 00:01:26,669 Look what Ginny lent me. 43 00:01:26,694 --> 00:01:27,948 I know, because you're babysitting 44 00:01:27,973 --> 00:01:29,772 your granddaughter tomorrow. I remember. 45 00:01:29,797 --> 00:01:32,631 How? You weren't even at lunch when I told everybody. 46 00:01:33,865 --> 00:01:35,457 You are both mean. 47 00:01:37,513 --> 00:01:40,458 Ooh. I had so much fun messing with her head. 48 00:01:40,483 --> 00:01:41,763 Can we make that a new thing? 49 00:01:41,788 --> 00:01:43,552 Let's make that our new thing. 50 00:01:43,818 --> 00:01:46,654 Oh, you don't have much going on, do you? 51 00:01:48,291 --> 00:01:53,291 - Synced and corrected by ChrisKe - -- for www.addic7ed.com -- 52 00:01:56,799 --> 00:01:58,891 Okay, uh, we both have our cell phones, 53 00:01:58,916 --> 00:02:02,078 but just in case, I'm sending you the numbers to the church, 54 00:02:02,103 --> 00:02:04,117 the reception hall and the bride and groom. 55 00:02:04,142 --> 00:02:05,471 Please don't call the bride and groom. 56 00:02:05,496 --> 00:02:07,162 I won't. 57 00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:10,442 Don't worry. Sophia and I are gonna be fine. 58 00:02:10,467 --> 00:02:11,921 - Hear that? Let's go. - I just... 59 00:02:11,946 --> 00:02:13,746 I want to cover everything in the diaper bag. 60 00:02:13,771 --> 00:02:16,587 Let's go. I haven't had a drink in 17 months. 61 00:02:16,740 --> 00:02:20,175 If we're bragging, I haven't had one in 38 years. 62 00:02:20,244 --> 00:02:21,743 Should we leave her the car seat? 63 00:02:21,855 --> 00:02:23,722 Actually, I bought one. 64 00:02:24,072 --> 00:02:26,848 - Oh, all right. - Uh, well, then let me double-check it 65 00:02:27,095 --> 00:02:29,795 'cause 74% of car seats are installed wrong. 66 00:02:29,864 --> 00:02:32,064 I had it installed at the fire station. 67 00:02:32,089 --> 00:02:33,722 We didn't even do that. 68 00:02:33,834 --> 00:02:35,100 Thank you, Marjorie. 69 00:02:35,133 --> 00:02:36,244 Mm-hmm. 70 00:02:36,269 --> 00:02:39,938 Goodbye, smushie. I love you so much. 71 00:02:39,963 --> 00:02:41,063 Jerry, get in the car. 72 00:02:41,088 --> 00:02:42,221 Okay. 73 00:02:42,450 --> 00:02:44,450 Have a nice time. 74 00:02:46,470 --> 00:02:48,070 Okay. 75 00:02:48,181 --> 00:02:51,750 You and Grandma are gonna have fun today. 76 00:02:51,775 --> 00:02:53,742 Let me show you around my house. 77 00:02:54,501 --> 00:02:56,486 Okay, this is the kitchen, 78 00:02:57,292 --> 00:02:59,791 and this is the living room. 79 00:03:01,085 --> 00:03:03,611 And that's cat barf I just stepped in. 80 00:03:04,332 --> 00:03:06,665 Oh, which one of you did this? 81 00:03:06,971 --> 00:03:10,064 We're gonna have to interrogate the cats. 82 00:03:12,126 --> 00:03:13,672 Thank you so much. 83 00:03:13,697 --> 00:03:16,431 I've never seen Boz Scaggs this sick. 84 00:03:17,150 --> 00:03:20,602 All right, so, Dr. Feeny doesn't work on the weekends, so, 85 00:03:20,627 --> 00:03:23,017 if they say that it's his liver, it's not. 86 00:03:23,042 --> 00:03:24,548 Those enzymes are always elevated. 87 00:03:24,573 --> 00:03:28,320 And if they try to give him amoxicillin, that is a big "no." 88 00:03:28,389 --> 00:03:31,113 - Marjorie? - Mm. You're right. 89 00:03:31,138 --> 00:03:32,571 You can handle it. 90 00:03:32,746 --> 00:03:35,013 Actually, I was gonna say I can't handle it. 91 00:03:36,153 --> 00:03:37,953 How about I stay here with the baby, 92 00:03:37,978 --> 00:03:39,832 and you take the cat to the vet? 93 00:03:40,103 --> 00:03:43,358 No. This is the first time my son is leaving her with me, 94 00:03:43,427 --> 00:03:45,203 and if anything happened... Hey. 95 00:03:45,228 --> 00:03:47,106 I kept two kids alive. 96 00:03:47,509 --> 00:03:49,842 They're not really talking to me, but they're alive. 97 00:03:49,867 --> 00:03:51,933 Okay. 98 00:03:52,002 --> 00:03:53,401 Mm-hmm. Okay. 99 00:03:54,079 --> 00:03:55,681 I'll be right back. 100 00:03:55,706 --> 00:03:57,439 Call me if you need me. 101 00:03:57,552 --> 00:03:59,151 Oh, oh, oh, I'm blocking you in. 102 00:03:59,587 --> 00:04:00,850 Here. Oh, just take my car. 103 00:04:01,466 --> 00:04:02,829 Oh. 104 00:04:04,225 --> 00:04:06,158 You know we'll never be able to do that again. 105 00:04:06,183 --> 00:04:08,298 Why would we need to? 106 00:04:10,923 --> 00:04:12,345 Bye, Sophia. 107 00:04:13,165 --> 00:04:14,566 Hi. 108 00:04:16,504 --> 00:04:18,971 My name is Christy, and I'm an alcoholic 109 00:04:19,361 --> 00:04:21,463 and a gambler and a natural blonde. 110 00:04:23,041 --> 00:04:25,074 Two truths and a lie. 111 00:04:26,749 --> 00:04:29,149 Oh, wait, wait, wait. Have you seen this one? 112 00:04:30,340 --> 00:04:31,744 Wait. Where'd I go? 113 00:04:32,745 --> 00:04:34,111 Here I am! 114 00:04:37,915 --> 00:04:41,383 Oh. Oh, no, no. Don't-don't worry. I'm not sick. 115 00:04:41,681 --> 00:04:44,596 I'm just very allergic to kittens, and like a silly willy, 116 00:04:44,621 --> 00:04:47,236 I forgot to bring my medication. 117 00:04:47,802 --> 00:04:51,197 Oh. Mm. 118 00:04:51,533 --> 00:04:53,726 Oh, you like that? 119 00:04:56,756 --> 00:04:58,122 Yeah. 120 00:04:58,147 --> 00:04:59,578 Ooh. Wait. 121 00:05:00,871 --> 00:05:02,871 Yeah. Uh-huh. 122 00:05:04,074 --> 00:05:06,508 Ah. 123 00:05:10,059 --> 00:05:13,392 Uh-oh. All gone. 124 00:05:14,608 --> 00:05:16,408 Oh, no. No, don't cry. Don't cry. 125 00:05:16,433 --> 00:05:17,796 There's another box. 126 00:05:18,989 --> 00:05:20,255 No, there isn't. 127 00:05:21,548 --> 00:05:22,993 Uh, um... Ah! 128 00:05:23,018 --> 00:05:24,726 Ha. We'll start over. 129 00:05:24,795 --> 00:05:26,061 Mm. Yeah. 130 00:05:26,129 --> 00:05:28,040 Ooh. Ah. 131 00:05:29,799 --> 00:05:33,335 Come on. It's the same thing we've been doing for an hour. 132 00:05:34,037 --> 00:05:35,937 Or ten minutes. Oh, my God. 133 00:05:39,353 --> 00:05:41,053 Ugh. Ah. 134 00:05:41,078 --> 00:05:43,633 All right, I got what I need. 135 00:05:44,982 --> 00:05:48,016 Ah. Oh, look. It's our favorite game. 136 00:05:49,353 --> 00:05:50,619 Ah. 137 00:05:52,950 --> 00:05:56,394 Oh, no. That's my mean law school professor. 138 00:05:57,094 --> 00:05:59,594 Well, they're all mean, but she makes the boys cry. 139 00:06:00,831 --> 00:06:03,865 Let's pretend to look at the stool softener. 140 00:06:03,890 --> 00:06:05,744 Mm-hmm. Excuse me. 141 00:06:05,769 --> 00:06:08,162 Aren't you in my administrative law class? 142 00:06:08,187 --> 00:06:09,404 Ah. 143 00:06:09,516 --> 00:06:11,783 Professor Winslow, I-I didn't see you. 144 00:06:11,808 --> 00:06:13,141 Yes. 145 00:06:13,166 --> 00:06:14,565 You look awful. 146 00:06:14,678 --> 00:06:15,981 Thank you. 147 00:06:17,778 --> 00:06:20,122 I didn't realize you had a baby. 148 00:06:20,559 --> 00:06:23,747 If I'd done law school with a baby, I'd be dead. 149 00:06:24,388 --> 00:06:26,154 Oh, well, no, she's not... 150 00:06:26,535 --> 00:06:27,610 Well... 151 00:06:28,225 --> 00:06:30,325 it is hard. 152 00:06:30,743 --> 00:06:32,468 So this... is why 153 00:06:32,493 --> 00:06:35,641 you're always late and distracted and unprepared? 154 00:06:36,876 --> 00:06:39,056 That's what you get for trying to have it all. 155 00:06:40,275 --> 00:06:42,481 Well, I didn't realize what you were dealing with. 156 00:06:42,550 --> 00:06:45,384 But I'm gonna be more patient with your mommy 157 00:06:45,409 --> 00:06:48,134 now that I realize why she's such a mess. 158 00:06:49,673 --> 00:06:50,906 Hang in there. 159 00:06:52,775 --> 00:06:53,825 I will! 160 00:06:56,053 --> 00:06:59,442 Where was this treatment when I got pregnant in high school? 161 00:07:03,473 --> 00:07:05,871 Got your text. What's going on? 162 00:07:06,346 --> 00:07:09,441 I thought I was having an allergy attack, 163 00:07:09,466 --> 00:07:11,487 but I think I'm coming down with something. 164 00:07:11,512 --> 00:07:14,079 You can't catch anything from a cat, right? 165 00:07:14,104 --> 00:07:16,471 What were you doing with it? 166 00:07:16,997 --> 00:07:19,518 Just take over with the baby. All right. 167 00:07:19,543 --> 00:07:20,696 All right, step aside. 168 00:07:20,777 --> 00:07:22,212 Let me show you how this is done. 169 00:07:22,813 --> 00:07:25,046 40 years late, but okay. 170 00:07:27,087 --> 00:07:28,687 Hey, I did something 171 00:07:28,712 --> 00:07:30,988 morally questionable. 172 00:07:31,013 --> 00:07:32,787 Is this about the cat again? 173 00:07:33,323 --> 00:07:36,123 I ran into my professor at the pharmacy 174 00:07:36,148 --> 00:07:38,582 and let her believe Sophia's my baby, 175 00:07:38,607 --> 00:07:41,041 and now she thinks I have a super hard life, 176 00:07:41,066 --> 00:07:42,732 and she's gonna give me special treatment. 177 00:07:42,757 --> 00:07:44,807 Hit me with the morally questionable part. 178 00:07:45,466 --> 00:07:47,666 That's it. I lied to her. 179 00:07:47,691 --> 00:07:49,402 First of all, that sounds like a lie of omission, 180 00:07:49,427 --> 00:07:50,659 and nobody counts those. 181 00:07:50,684 --> 00:07:52,617 But more importantly, your life is hard. 182 00:07:52,766 --> 00:07:54,566 Yeah, but I don't have a baby. 183 00:07:54,591 --> 00:07:56,053 So your life is hard in different ways. 184 00:07:56,078 --> 00:07:59,146 You've got, like, 27 addictions and 12 jobs. 185 00:07:59,278 --> 00:08:01,244 Okay, it's only two addictions. 186 00:08:01,269 --> 00:08:03,369 That we know about. 187 00:08:03,576 --> 00:08:05,810 Honey, your life is a crapfest 188 00:08:05,835 --> 00:08:09,045 wrapped in a nightmare on top of a dumpster fire. 189 00:08:09,584 --> 00:08:12,850 Great. Now I'm sick and sad. 190 00:08:14,080 --> 00:08:16,180 Marjorie has my car. Give me your keys. 191 00:08:16,205 --> 00:08:18,533 Don't wreck my car. 192 00:08:18,727 --> 00:08:21,125 Don't leave her in a basket at the laundromat. 193 00:08:21,150 --> 00:08:22,918 Oh, come on! Aren't we laughing about that yet? 194 00:08:22,943 --> 00:08:24,536 We are not. 195 00:08:26,025 --> 00:08:27,825 We can laugh about it. 196 00:08:29,235 --> 00:08:32,369 Okay, we've been through all your grandma's 197 00:08:32,394 --> 00:08:34,327 drawers and closets, 198 00:08:34,352 --> 00:08:37,353 so we're officially out of things to do. 199 00:08:37,493 --> 00:08:38,833 Mm. 200 00:08:39,279 --> 00:08:43,715 By the way, women's underpants don't all look like that. 201 00:08:43,853 --> 00:08:45,987 But if you're curious about how people dressed 202 00:08:46,012 --> 00:08:48,079 in pioneer days, you're welcome. 203 00:08:52,330 --> 00:08:54,825 ♪ Ooh, do-do-do, doo-Dee, boo. ♪ 204 00:08:55,276 --> 00:08:57,220 What to do? 205 00:08:59,618 --> 00:09:01,686 See, this is what we needed. 206 00:09:01,711 --> 00:09:04,849 A little fresh air, change of scenery. 207 00:09:04,913 --> 00:09:06,546 Ah, look! 208 00:09:07,037 --> 00:09:09,037 I got hammered at that winery. 209 00:09:10,186 --> 00:09:12,044 And that one. 210 00:09:12,280 --> 00:09:15,648 Ooh, did coke behind that one with a gentleman in long boots. 211 00:09:19,047 --> 00:09:21,113 Don't look at me with that judgy face. 212 00:09:22,623 --> 00:09:25,251 Damn, it's so adorable. Hmm. 213 00:09:26,298 --> 00:09:28,903 I should have spent more time looking at Christy's face 214 00:09:28,928 --> 00:09:30,708 when she was a baby. 215 00:09:30,997 --> 00:09:32,662 I bet it was cute. 216 00:09:33,266 --> 00:09:35,766 Ah, gettin' sad. 217 00:09:35,791 --> 00:09:37,657 Let's crank some tunes. 218 00:09:39,672 --> 00:09:41,105 Ooh! ♪ Do the conga ♪ 219 00:09:41,130 --> 00:09:43,184 ♪ No, you can't control your body any longer ♪ 220 00:09:43,209 --> 00:09:45,643 ♪ Hoop-ah, ta-ta, ta-ta, da-da, bah-boo ♪ 221 00:09:45,668 --> 00:09:47,401 ♪ Bah, Dee-Dee-Dee, do the bomba ♪ 222 00:09:49,518 --> 00:09:51,384 Yeah! Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay. Oh! 223 00:09:53,100 --> 00:09:55,500 Oh! Aw, damn! 224 00:09:59,679 --> 00:10:00,991 Oh. 225 00:10:03,796 --> 00:10:06,764 You feel like helping me change a tire? 226 00:10:08,291 --> 00:10:10,491 Don't pretend to be asleep. 227 00:10:22,694 --> 00:10:24,483 Are you kidding me? 228 00:10:24,733 --> 00:10:27,551 Great, Marjorie, no spare tire, 229 00:10:27,576 --> 00:10:30,420 but you got an emergency Christmas sweater. 230 00:10:36,028 --> 00:10:37,396 Oh, no. 231 00:10:37,681 --> 00:10:38,814 No, no. 232 00:10:39,085 --> 00:10:40,485 No, no, no, no, no, no. 233 00:10:41,846 --> 00:10:43,646 Oh. 234 00:10:43,903 --> 00:10:45,502 Sophia? 235 00:10:45,527 --> 00:10:47,092 See the little button? 236 00:10:47,217 --> 00:10:48,973 Open the door. 237 00:10:49,085 --> 00:10:50,785 Do you know "open"? 238 00:10:50,810 --> 00:10:51,942 Waah! 239 00:10:52,731 --> 00:10:54,144 Oh. Don't laugh at me. 240 00:10:54,169 --> 00:10:56,442 I'm trying to help you. 241 00:10:56,649 --> 00:11:00,017 Oh, no. Oh, my God, I'm failing another baby. 242 00:11:00,130 --> 00:11:01,629 Okay, don't panic. 243 00:11:01,654 --> 00:11:03,914 Just think. Just think. 244 00:11:08,833 --> 00:11:10,406 Bad idea. 245 00:11:11,169 --> 00:11:13,770 Look at me know it's a bad idea before I did it. 246 00:11:14,117 --> 00:11:15,109 Okay. 247 00:11:15,134 --> 00:11:16,400 Oh. 248 00:11:20,439 --> 00:11:21,930 Don't worry. 249 00:11:22,035 --> 00:11:25,344 Aunt Bonnie knows how to break into cars. 250 00:11:26,806 --> 00:11:28,543 Stop with the judgy face. 251 00:11:34,787 --> 00:11:36,208 Better. 252 00:11:39,548 --> 00:11:40,751 Yes! 253 00:11:41,657 --> 00:11:43,857 Here's Bonnie! 254 00:11:45,988 --> 00:11:47,754 Hey. 255 00:11:47,779 --> 00:11:49,278 Ooh. 256 00:11:50,724 --> 00:11:51,818 Hold on. 257 00:11:56,025 --> 00:11:58,409 I... am... 258 00:11:58,434 --> 00:12:00,167 amazing! 259 00:12:02,697 --> 00:12:04,048 And stuck in a trunk. 260 00:12:08,235 --> 00:12:12,556 ♪ Row, row, row your boat gently down the stream ♪ 261 00:12:12,581 --> 00:12:14,922 ♪ Merrily, merrily, merri... ♪ 262 00:12:15,247 --> 00:12:17,147 How the hell did you manage this? 263 00:12:17,172 --> 00:12:19,773 Why do you assume it was my fault? 264 00:12:25,047 --> 00:12:28,281 Isn't this more fun than waiting back there for a tow truck? 265 00:12:32,895 --> 00:12:34,795 You are gonna love Bugs Bunny. 266 00:12:34,820 --> 00:12:36,836 I used to watch it all the time when I was a kid. 267 00:12:36,861 --> 00:12:39,061 And sometimes in college when I was hi... 268 00:12:39,817 --> 00:12:41,650 hey, baby. 269 00:12:44,236 --> 00:12:45,602 Huh. 270 00:12:45,627 --> 00:12:48,633 I don't remember them shooting each other in the face so much. 271 00:12:49,157 --> 00:12:51,805 Oh, my God. He just picked his mouth up off the floor 272 00:12:51,830 --> 00:12:53,263 and stuck it back on. 273 00:12:53,288 --> 00:12:55,387 I'm just gonna turn this off. 274 00:12:57,345 --> 00:12:59,078 You are so sweet. 275 00:12:59,103 --> 00:13:00,911 And your skin is flawless. 276 00:13:00,936 --> 00:13:02,320 Do you have a specific routine, 277 00:13:02,345 --> 00:13:05,184 or is it just not having been on Earth very long? 278 00:13:06,082 --> 00:13:09,083 You're right. A lady never tells. 279 00:13:16,595 --> 00:13:18,628 Oh, I want one of you so bad. 280 00:13:31,703 --> 00:13:33,202 Hey, ladies. 281 00:13:33,270 --> 00:13:35,704 Oh, Jill, you didn't steal a baby. 282 00:13:36,115 --> 00:13:37,512 It's Marjorie's granddaughter, 283 00:13:37,537 --> 00:13:39,370 but I'm kind of pretending like she's mine. 284 00:13:39,900 --> 00:13:41,885 Ooh, it's cold in here. Could you hold her for a second 285 00:13:41,910 --> 00:13:43,042 while I grab her hat? 286 00:13:43,067 --> 00:13:44,927 Ugh, no. Not a fan. 287 00:13:46,048 --> 00:13:49,083 - You're a nurse. - Of adults. 288 00:13:49,476 --> 00:13:51,688 What is the matter with you? 289 00:13:51,975 --> 00:13:55,010 Babies are the most precious things in the world. 290 00:13:57,010 --> 00:13:58,976 And I am never gonna have one. 291 00:13:59,022 --> 00:14:00,722 Oh, you don't know that. 292 00:14:01,140 --> 00:14:03,099 It's starting to feel that way. 293 00:14:04,789 --> 00:14:07,723 And I've been doing my best to put on a brave face, 294 00:14:07,836 --> 00:14:10,503 but then this little bundle of joy lands in my lap, 295 00:14:10,528 --> 00:14:12,373 and I can't hold it together anymore. 296 00:14:14,101 --> 00:14:16,835 Can somebody please take the baby so I could get her hat! 297 00:14:16,947 --> 00:14:18,344 - You do it. - I don't know, 298 00:14:18,369 --> 00:14:20,402 I'm not really into babies. 299 00:14:20,427 --> 00:14:22,227 Look at the baby! 300 00:14:24,510 --> 00:14:26,603 You don't think she smells weird? 301 00:14:29,376 --> 00:14:32,108 I know I'm supposed to trust that my higher power has a plan, 302 00:14:32,133 --> 00:14:34,225 but... I'm not really interested 303 00:14:34,250 --> 00:14:36,984 if that plan doesn't include me being a mother. 304 00:14:37,672 --> 00:14:38,835 Aw. 305 00:14:40,479 --> 00:14:41,479 See? 306 00:14:41,633 --> 00:14:43,567 Adults I'm good with. 307 00:14:45,397 --> 00:14:47,284 Here. I'll take her outside. 308 00:14:47,309 --> 00:14:48,510 No, you need to be here more than me. 309 00:14:48,535 --> 00:14:51,170 I was just gonna bitch about Adam. You're having a breakdown. 310 00:14:51,502 --> 00:14:54,236 But she could still be my baby for a few more hours. 311 00:14:54,261 --> 00:14:56,862 Ooh. Yikes. Listen. Wendy, you start the meeting. 312 00:14:56,887 --> 00:14:58,887 - I'm gonna take her back to Marjorie's. - Okay. 313 00:14:59,154 --> 00:15:01,521 Ugh. The little hands. 314 00:15:05,993 --> 00:15:07,760 Look at you so tiny. 315 00:15:07,867 --> 00:15:09,600 Just starting out. 316 00:15:09,807 --> 00:15:12,323 Good news... it's a great time to be a woman. 317 00:15:12,348 --> 00:15:14,015 You can be fierce now. 318 00:15:14,373 --> 00:15:17,495 You don't have to take C-R-A-P from anybody. 319 00:15:17,815 --> 00:15:19,561 You can speak your mind. 320 00:15:19,586 --> 00:15:22,729 You can tell a guy when he's being a D-I-C-K. 321 00:15:25,178 --> 00:15:27,512 Know what? We're gonna make one stop. 322 00:15:32,020 --> 00:15:33,397 - I quit. - What? 323 00:15:33,881 --> 00:15:35,321 Whose baby is that? 324 00:15:35,346 --> 00:15:37,120 Don't change the subject. I can't work for someone 325 00:15:37,145 --> 00:15:38,194 who doesn't trust me. 326 00:15:38,219 --> 00:15:40,272 Who doesn't trust you? Whose baby is that? 327 00:15:40,297 --> 00:15:42,303 You don't trust me. You banned me from your office. 328 00:15:42,328 --> 00:15:44,622 I mean, I get it. Don't trust the ex-con. 329 00:15:44,647 --> 00:15:46,080 We don't deserve a second chance. 330 00:15:46,105 --> 00:15:47,438 Why let us out at all? 331 00:15:47,463 --> 00:15:49,530 Okay, here's a little something I learned at home. 332 00:15:49,555 --> 00:15:51,467 Do you need a meeting? 333 00:15:51,492 --> 00:15:53,170 Oh, 'cause I'm feeling my feelings? 334 00:15:53,195 --> 00:15:55,229 Tammy, I told everyone to stay out of my office. 335 00:15:55,254 --> 00:15:56,453 - You did? - Yeah. 336 00:15:56,478 --> 00:15:59,082 - Why? - 'Cause I don't trust Joe yet, 337 00:15:59,107 --> 00:16:01,274 and I didn't want to single him out. 338 00:16:01,857 --> 00:16:03,790 Oh, yeah, Joe's super creepy. 339 00:16:03,815 --> 00:16:05,565 Why'd you hire him in the first place? 340 00:16:05,590 --> 00:16:07,891 'Cause he's an ex-con, and I'm trying to give him a break. 341 00:16:08,093 --> 00:16:11,061 Oh. Well, I feel a little foolish. 342 00:16:12,556 --> 00:16:14,556 Do you want to un-quit? 343 00:16:14,581 --> 00:16:16,571 Yes, please. And now that I'm back, 344 00:16:16,596 --> 00:16:18,529 can I get some free employee wings? 345 00:16:19,070 --> 00:16:20,536 Hello, baby. 346 00:16:22,960 --> 00:16:24,770 Never mind. We're leaving. 347 00:16:24,795 --> 00:16:27,329 Well... whose baby is that? 348 00:16:29,598 --> 00:16:31,098 We're home. 349 00:16:32,656 --> 00:16:34,022 Christy? 350 00:16:35,916 --> 00:16:37,349 Sophia? 351 00:16:40,660 --> 00:16:41,992 Christy? 352 00:16:52,879 --> 00:16:54,179 Hello? 353 00:16:54,204 --> 00:16:55,504 Where are you? 354 00:16:55,529 --> 00:16:56,929 I don't know. 355 00:16:57,076 --> 00:16:58,809 Where is Sophia? 356 00:17:00,050 --> 00:17:02,483 She's with my mom at your house. 357 00:17:02,508 --> 00:17:04,729 I'm at my house. No one's here. 358 00:17:05,446 --> 00:17:07,889 Hold on. I'll-I'll conference her in. 359 00:17:11,361 --> 00:17:13,722 - Go for Bonnie. - Where are you? 360 00:17:13,747 --> 00:17:15,068 I'm on the side of the road 361 00:17:15,093 --> 00:17:16,826 watching Arlo change a tire. 362 00:17:16,851 --> 00:17:17,783 - What? - What? 363 00:17:17,808 --> 00:17:19,874 - Where is the baby? - Hey, Marjorie. 364 00:17:19,899 --> 00:17:21,832 She's at your house with Jill. 365 00:17:21,857 --> 00:17:24,491 I'm at my house. There's no one here. 366 00:17:24,516 --> 00:17:26,482 Let me conference her in. 367 00:17:26,507 --> 00:17:29,116 Hello? 368 00:17:29,141 --> 00:17:30,999 - Where are you? - Oh. Leaving a meeting. 369 00:17:31,024 --> 00:17:32,782 Where is my granddaughter? 370 00:17:32,851 --> 00:17:34,884 Well, Tammy brought her back to your house, 371 00:17:34,909 --> 00:17:36,971 because I was having a bit of a meltdown. 372 00:17:36,996 --> 00:17:38,595 No good comes from babies. 373 00:17:38,850 --> 00:17:40,617 Tammy's not here. 374 00:17:40,642 --> 00:17:42,670 All conference her in. 375 00:17:44,201 --> 00:17:45,217 Hello? 376 00:17:45,242 --> 00:17:47,084 - Where's Sophia? - Where are you? - Where's the baby? 377 00:17:47,109 --> 00:17:49,776 Is this a conference call? I've never been on one of those. 378 00:17:49,801 --> 00:17:52,335 Just tell me where you are. 379 00:17:52,360 --> 00:17:53,793 I'm in your living room. 380 00:17:53,818 --> 00:17:55,320 - No, you aren't! - No, you're not! 381 00:17:55,345 --> 00:17:57,111 Wait. Yes, you are. 382 00:17:57,656 --> 00:17:59,189 Goodbye. 383 00:18:00,145 --> 00:18:02,812 Oh... ah... 384 00:18:02,837 --> 00:18:06,730 There's my beautiful girl! 385 00:18:06,755 --> 00:18:08,221 She prefers "fierce woman." 386 00:18:08,246 --> 00:18:10,780 Also, if you blow on her belly, she giggles. 387 00:18:10,805 --> 00:18:12,471 Then again, who doesn't? 388 00:18:22,117 --> 00:18:24,240 Hi. How was the wedding? 389 00:18:24,265 --> 00:18:26,421 It was great. Where's Sophia? 390 00:18:26,446 --> 00:18:28,179 - Right there. - Hi! 391 00:18:28,204 --> 00:18:30,683 We had the best time! 392 00:18:30,708 --> 00:18:34,070 We danced. People filled my wineglass. 393 00:18:34,095 --> 00:18:36,963 No one bit down on my nipple. 394 00:18:37,348 --> 00:18:39,681 Oh, I'm so glad. 395 00:18:39,706 --> 00:18:42,738 Sophia and I had a wonderful day, too. 396 00:18:42,769 --> 00:18:45,085 You know, I got to admit, I was little nervous about this, 397 00:18:45,110 --> 00:18:46,382 but you really came through. 398 00:18:46,407 --> 00:18:48,774 - You're the best. - Oh. 399 00:18:48,799 --> 00:18:50,032 You really have changed. 400 00:18:50,415 --> 00:18:52,048 That means a lot. 401 00:18:52,233 --> 00:18:55,921 So, um, maybe we can do this again sometime. 402 00:18:55,946 --> 00:18:57,879 - I would love that. - I would love that. 403 00:18:59,791 --> 00:19:01,291 Okay. 404 00:19:04,786 --> 00:19:06,653 Jerry. Wait. 405 00:19:07,986 --> 00:19:09,186 Um... 406 00:19:09,211 --> 00:19:12,088 I didn't exactly do this alone today. 407 00:19:12,113 --> 00:19:14,792 Uh, I had to take a sick cat to the vet, 408 00:19:14,817 --> 00:19:17,418 so I left Sophia with Christy, 409 00:19:17,443 --> 00:19:20,128 and then Christy came down with a cold, 410 00:19:20,153 --> 00:19:23,487 so she gave Sophia to her mom, and... 411 00:19:24,005 --> 00:19:25,938 Basically, everyone on my speed dial 412 00:19:25,963 --> 00:19:28,617 took care of your daughter today. 413 00:19:29,450 --> 00:19:30,615 But I guarantee you 414 00:19:30,640 --> 00:19:32,644 she was safe and loved 415 00:19:32,669 --> 00:19:35,170 the entire time. 416 00:19:35,637 --> 00:19:37,416 Although she did go to a bar 417 00:19:37,441 --> 00:19:39,262 and attend her first AA meeting. 418 00:19:42,801 --> 00:19:45,368 I-I can't believe you told me all that. 419 00:19:45,695 --> 00:19:49,238 Well... it's just, it took so long 420 00:19:49,263 --> 00:19:52,664 to get you back in my life... I want to be completely honest. 421 00:19:54,159 --> 00:19:55,792 I appreciate that. 422 00:19:56,260 --> 00:19:58,260 Okay. 423 00:19:58,285 --> 00:20:00,084 Talk to you later, Mom. 424 00:20:14,409 --> 00:20:15,675 Hello? 425 00:20:16,026 --> 00:20:17,777 He called me Mom. 426 00:20:19,034 --> 00:20:20,167 Oh, my God. 427 00:20:20,192 --> 00:20:22,426 I'll conference everyone in! 428 00:20:22,450 --> 00:20:27,450 - Synced and corrected by ChrisKe - -- for www.addic7ed.com --