1
00:00:02,202 --> 00:00:07,539
♪♪
2
00:00:37,170 --> 00:00:40,372
(woman)
ohh... Ah!
3
00:00:41,007 --> 00:00:42,341
(man)
oh, oh, oh, oh.
4
00:00:42,343 --> 00:00:46,378
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah,
oh yeah.
5
00:00:47,781 --> 00:00:49,114
(man)
yeah.
6
00:00:49,116 --> 00:00:53,052
Oh yeah, oh, unh.
7
00:00:53,054 --> 00:00:54,887
Oh...
8
00:00:54,889 --> 00:00:56,655
Unh...
9
00:00:56,657 --> 00:00:57,589
Ah...
Mmm...
10
00:00:57,591 --> 00:01:01,226
Yeah, that's a nice
beach ball...
11
00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:03,796
Oh, yeah, uh...
12
00:01:03,798 --> 00:01:05,264
(gasping)
13
00:01:05,266 --> 00:01:08,634
Uh... Uh....
Oh...
14
00:01:08,636 --> 00:01:09,134
Trey.
15
00:01:09,136 --> 00:01:12,137
♪ four and three and two
and one-one ♪♪
16
00:01:20,814 --> 00:01:22,548
You weren't eating those
fries, were you?
17
00:01:22,550 --> 00:01:24,650
Mm-mm.
Good, 'cause they're from
last night.
18
00:01:24,652 --> 00:01:27,019
Someone left them on
the floor in the bathroom.
19
00:01:27,954 --> 00:01:29,221
Head shot?
20
00:01:29,223 --> 00:01:30,556
Uh, um...
21
00:01:30,558 --> 00:01:32,091
You know, I don't have
a head shot.
22
00:01:32,093 --> 00:01:33,792
But I have
a resume, so&
23
00:01:33,794 --> 00:01:35,060
Yeah, I don't need
to see that.
24
00:01:35,062 --> 00:01:37,596
All right, I'll just
cliff notes it for you then.
25
00:01:37,598 --> 00:01:40,599
Uh, so I currently work
at a gym.
26
00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:41,967
Upscale gym.
(sipping loudly)
27
00:01:41,969 --> 00:01:43,268
Uh, long-term,
I'm an illustrator,
28
00:01:43,270 --> 00:01:45,304
Visual artist--
just let me cut
you off right there.
29
00:01:45,306 --> 00:01:47,739
This job, it's
putting wristbands on people.
30
00:01:47,741 --> 00:01:49,174
Honestly, a (bleep) idiot
could do it.
31
00:01:49,176 --> 00:01:51,310
Oh, I'm a-I'm a huge
(bleep) idiot.
32
00:01:51,312 --> 00:01:53,612
Yeah, I'm sorry,
I just don't think
33
00:01:53,614 --> 00:01:54,847
You're wristband
material.
34
00:01:54,849 --> 00:01:58,083
I'm cleaning pubes
for a living right now, so&
35
00:01:58,085 --> 00:01:58,851
I'm sorry, daphne.
36
00:01:58,853 --> 00:02:00,052
If you could just
send the next person in
37
00:02:00,054 --> 00:02:03,021
That'd be great.
You're gonna rue the day that
you said--
38
00:02:03,023 --> 00:02:04,756
Okay.
I'm sure.
39
00:02:08,661 --> 00:02:09,828
You're up.
40
00:02:09,830 --> 00:02:12,364
(phone vibrating)
41
00:02:13,233 --> 00:02:13,699
Hi.
42
00:02:13,701 --> 00:02:15,300
What's wrong, do you need
me to come get you?
43
00:02:15,302 --> 00:02:15,767
No.
44
00:02:15,769 --> 00:02:17,803
I'm just going to be digging out
other people's pubes
45
00:02:17,805 --> 00:02:19,438
Till I'm
a great-grandmother.
46
00:02:19,440 --> 00:02:20,506
We'll see about that.
47
00:02:20,508 --> 00:02:21,907
Meet me
at the coffee shop.
48
00:02:21,909 --> 00:02:24,009
I have
a job opportunity.
49
00:02:24,011 --> 00:02:25,177
Amber alert.
50
00:02:25,179 --> 00:02:26,612
Urgency.
(phone beeping off)
51
00:02:26,614 --> 00:02:27,212
Hello?
52
00:02:27,214 --> 00:02:30,382
What coffee shop, what
time, what?
53
00:02:30,384 --> 00:02:32,184
Never any details.
54
00:02:32,452 --> 00:02:35,053
I'm so sorry,
I had to take that.
55
00:02:35,055 --> 00:02:39,158
You made that call in
the middle of our conversation.
56
00:02:39,160 --> 00:02:39,892
Did I?
57
00:02:39,894 --> 00:02:43,495
So I was
asking, how's university?
58
00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:44,863
College?
59
00:02:44,865 --> 00:02:46,565
It-- it was expensive.
60
00:02:46,567 --> 00:02:47,099
Wonderful.
61
00:02:47,101 --> 00:02:48,934
Okay, here's a list of
your instructions
62
00:02:48,936 --> 00:02:50,435
For your
Saturday with oliver.
63
00:02:50,437 --> 00:02:52,771
Now oliver can't have any
soy products,
64
00:02:52,773 --> 00:02:56,308
So you know, when in doubt,
just go to babbo or nobu
65
00:02:56,310 --> 00:02:57,743
Or momofuku.
Yes.
66
00:02:57,745 --> 00:03:01,079
Yolo, fomo, tippy-tee.
67
00:03:01,081 --> 00:03:03,615
(chuckling)
you are so funny.
68
00:03:03,617 --> 00:03:05,551
Oh, but ilana, please...
69
00:03:05,553 --> 00:03:07,753
Don't get
him a slice again.
70
00:03:07,755 --> 00:03:08,520
Apologies.
71
00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:09,955
There's $300
on the counter.
72
00:03:09,957 --> 00:03:12,658
Let oliver hold it,
he needs to learn.
73
00:03:12,660 --> 00:03:15,460
Okay, bye, ollie.
74
00:03:15,462 --> 00:03:16,361
Bye, mommy.
75
00:03:16,363 --> 00:03:19,164
I love you,
you are my sweet treasure.
76
00:03:19,166 --> 00:03:20,566
I'm off to interview
desi tutu
77
00:03:20,568 --> 00:03:22,968
And wax
with martha plimpton.
78
00:03:22,970 --> 00:03:24,436
What a bad bitch.
79
00:03:24,438 --> 00:03:25,637
Ilana, look.
80
00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:29,441
Holy moly,
that is increds!
81
00:03:29,443 --> 00:03:31,376
Good job, whew!
82
00:03:31,378 --> 00:03:33,712
So how are you?
83
00:03:33,714 --> 00:03:36,048
How "am" I?
84
00:03:36,050 --> 00:03:37,749
Good god, bwah.
85
00:03:37,751 --> 00:03:40,252
Last time I saw you,
you were a toothless spud
86
00:03:40,254 --> 00:03:41,453
Sitting in your
own poop.
87
00:03:41,455 --> 00:03:44,656
(chuckling)
I like when you babysit.
88
00:03:45,124 --> 00:03:46,058
(ilana)
four rs, my friend.
89
00:03:46,060 --> 00:03:48,694
Reduce, re-use,
recycle, rhianna!
90
00:03:48,696 --> 00:03:50,762
I'm sorry, ma'am,
we can't reuse cups.
91
00:03:50,764 --> 00:03:52,864
It's a health code
violation.
92
00:03:52,866 --> 00:03:54,266
Come on.
93
00:03:54,968 --> 00:03:57,402
This is so gross.
94
00:03:58,638 --> 00:04:00,172
Finally-- ab, ab.
95
00:04:00,174 --> 00:04:01,240
Nice to
meet you, abbi.
96
00:04:01,242 --> 00:04:03,041
I've heard so much
about you.
97
00:04:03,043 --> 00:04:04,776
What are you,
on the campaign trail?
98
00:04:04,778 --> 00:04:05,978
Oliver, you're a child.
99
00:04:05,980 --> 00:04:08,814
Give her a full-bodied hug
and mean it.
100
00:04:08,816 --> 00:04:09,448
Okay.
101
00:04:09,450 --> 00:04:12,818
I mean it.
I mean it too.
102
00:04:14,454 --> 00:04:15,754
Juice, my man.
103
00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:17,656
Stand guard.
104
00:04:18,157 --> 00:04:19,825
So, uh, this kid's
parents know
105
00:04:19,827 --> 00:04:21,760
That you're
watching him, right?
106
00:04:21,762 --> 00:04:22,461
Yes-uh.
107
00:04:22,463 --> 00:04:24,930
I'm doing more than
"watching" him.
108
00:04:24,932 --> 00:04:25,831
I am molding him.
109
00:04:25,833 --> 00:04:28,734
Oliver is at a tipping point
right now, okay?
110
00:04:28,736 --> 00:04:31,036
If I didn't step in,
he could go to yale.
111
00:04:31,038 --> 00:04:34,606
And then yale law
and then kill a stripper
112
00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:35,407
And settle out
of court.
113
00:04:35,409 --> 00:04:39,378
Jesus, ilana, he's
an innocent little boy.
114
00:04:40,079 --> 00:04:41,179
Yeah, for now...
115
00:04:41,181 --> 00:04:42,147
But if I don't do
something,
116
00:04:42,149 --> 00:04:47,019
He could turn into another
useless rich old white man.
117
00:04:47,021 --> 00:04:48,086
Hm.
118
00:04:48,088 --> 00:04:49,421
Why am I
here right now?
119
00:04:49,423 --> 00:04:52,791
Okay, all business,
getting to it.
120
00:04:54,027 --> 00:04:55,594
Ilana, I'm not
watching porn in here.
121
00:04:55,596 --> 00:04:59,398
First of all, everybody's
watching porn in here.
122
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:02,868
Okay?
123
00:05:02,870 --> 00:05:03,368
You got it?
124
00:05:03,370 --> 00:05:06,538
Second of all, you need
to trust me because
125
00:05:06,540 --> 00:05:10,242
You're about to experience
the best moment of your life.
126
00:05:10,244 --> 00:05:13,745
Okay, so I need to retrace my
porn steps first.
127
00:05:13,747 --> 00:05:16,548
I don't watch
anything but solo porn
128
00:05:16,550 --> 00:05:17,716
Because regular porn
is like,
129
00:05:17,718 --> 00:05:21,853
"shut up, little girl,
wash my feet!"
130
00:05:21,855 --> 00:05:25,190
And she's like,
"uh, don't tell my dad, okay?
131
00:05:25,192 --> 00:05:27,259
'cause I'm just
barely legal.
132
00:05:27,261 --> 00:05:33,031
I love shaved pubes and tan,
crispy bellies and tits."
133
00:05:33,033 --> 00:05:33,899
It's like, ugh.
134
00:05:33,901 --> 00:05:36,435
So I started
with average-size penis jerk.
135
00:05:36,437 --> 00:05:39,671
Of course.
That led me
to twins squirting, hello.
136
00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:43,975
Which then brought me to frosted
tips masturbation.
137
00:05:43,977 --> 00:05:46,011
(sighing)
138
00:05:46,013 --> 00:05:48,380
Whoa, I just usually
google "porn".
139
00:05:48,382 --> 00:05:50,182
That's probably
why I really, really
140
00:05:50,184 --> 00:05:51,249
Don't like most
of it.
141
00:05:51,251 --> 00:05:53,852
Um, I don't know,
maybe you should just
142
00:05:53,854 --> 00:05:55,354
Check your search
history.
143
00:05:55,356 --> 00:05:58,090
Oh my god, uh-doi.
144
00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:01,193
Oh my god,
get ready, bitch.
145
00:06:01,794 --> 00:06:03,528
(moaning)
(chuckling)
146
00:06:03,530 --> 00:06:05,630
Oh my god.
147
00:06:05,632 --> 00:06:07,332
Oh...
148
00:06:07,334 --> 00:06:08,867
My...
149
00:06:08,869 --> 00:06:09,801
God.
150
00:06:09,803 --> 00:06:11,470
Trey is
in a porn!
151
00:06:11,472 --> 00:06:13,739
Kirk steele?
152
00:06:13,741 --> 00:06:15,173
Hold on, ilana.
(bleep)
153
00:06:15,175 --> 00:06:18,043
So before trey was my
boss, he was a porn star?
154
00:06:18,045 --> 00:06:22,614
So, so I'm taking orders
from a porn star.
(laughing)
155
00:06:22,616 --> 00:06:24,383
I can't
even believe this.
156
00:06:24,385 --> 00:06:25,384
What do I even do
with this?
157
00:06:25,386 --> 00:06:27,686
I don't know
what to do with this?
158
00:06:27,688 --> 00:06:30,856
Use it, bitch.
159
00:06:32,892 --> 00:06:34,192
Oh, yeah.
160
00:06:35,395 --> 00:06:36,261
(humming)
161
00:06:36,263 --> 00:06:37,729
(trey)
abbi?
162
00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:38,363
There you are.
163
00:06:38,365 --> 00:06:39,531
I'm always looking
for you, I love it.
164
00:06:39,533 --> 00:06:43,201
(english accent)
so there's a bloody (bleep)
spill in the spin studio.
165
00:06:43,203 --> 00:06:46,138
(chuckling)
but really, there's
a bloody (bleep) spill
166
00:06:46,140 --> 00:06:48,240
In the spin studio.
Oh, is there?
167
00:06:48,242 --> 00:06:50,809
Next level, yeah.
Oh.
168
00:06:52,378 --> 00:06:54,212
And?
169
00:06:54,214 --> 00:06:55,514
And I need
you to clean it.
170
00:06:55,516 --> 00:06:59,184
Oh, I would, but I gotta
relax before I teach
171
00:06:59,186 --> 00:07:01,920
The 12:30 kickass
kettle bell class.
172
00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:03,355
What are you talking
about right now?
173
00:07:03,357 --> 00:07:06,425
You know, I'm coming
down with something, I think.
174
00:07:06,427 --> 00:07:08,460
There's a lot
of phlegm.
175
00:07:08,462 --> 00:07:10,662
(clearing throat)
176
00:07:12,365 --> 00:07:14,166
Whoa, that is a lot of
phlegm, isn't it?
177
00:07:14,168 --> 00:07:16,935
Abbi, that trick
is for after hours, okay?
178
00:07:16,937 --> 00:07:19,671
Oh, is it...
179
00:07:19,673 --> 00:07:21,239
Kirk?
180
00:07:23,709 --> 00:07:25,410
Let's go to your office
right now.
181
00:07:25,412 --> 00:07:27,045
I don't
have an office.
182
00:07:27,047 --> 00:07:29,815
♪♪
183
00:07:29,817 --> 00:07:31,316
Get in.
184
00:07:33,186 --> 00:07:34,219
Trey, this isn't
my office.
185
00:07:34,221 --> 00:07:35,821
Yeah, it is, all your
stuff's in here.
186
00:07:35,823 --> 00:07:37,255
This is your snake
and your cardigan.
187
00:07:37,257 --> 00:07:39,558
All right, you got your tweezer
and your tweezing mirror.
188
00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:40,258
No one
else uses this.
189
00:07:40,260 --> 00:07:43,695
This is a picture of you and
your childhood pug, all right?
190
00:07:45,331 --> 00:07:47,432
Fine, it's
my (bleep) office.
191
00:07:47,434 --> 00:07:48,300
Abbi,
when you said,
192
00:07:48,302 --> 00:07:51,636
"kirk steele: A man on
a mission, a (bleep) mission",
193
00:07:51,638 --> 00:07:52,838
What did you mean?
194
00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:54,172
Well, I just said
"kirk",
195
00:07:54,174 --> 00:07:56,775
But you have now confirmed
that you are a porn star.
196
00:07:56,777 --> 00:07:58,643
Thank you
for calling me a star.
197
00:07:58,645 --> 00:08:00,545
But abbi, you can't tell
anyone, all right?
198
00:08:00,547 --> 00:08:01,613
I'll get fired.
199
00:08:01,615 --> 00:08:04,082
Please, abbi,
you gotta swear.
200
00:08:04,951 --> 00:08:06,251
What do you want,
money?
No.
201
00:08:06,253 --> 00:08:08,720
I'll go down on you
right now.
No, what?
202
00:08:08,722 --> 00:08:09,187
No.
203
00:08:09,189 --> 00:08:12,891
I want to teach the 12:30
kickass kettle bell class.
204
00:08:12,893 --> 00:08:14,993
We can start there.
That's gemma's class.
205
00:08:14,995 --> 00:08:15,594
I don't care.
206
00:08:15,596 --> 00:08:18,296
Look, can't I just go
down on you?
No, stop it.
207
00:08:18,298 --> 00:08:21,366
I think it would be
in your best interest...
208
00:08:21,368 --> 00:08:22,667
Kirk.
209
00:08:23,603 --> 00:08:25,036
Yes, looking good.
210
00:08:25,038 --> 00:08:26,905
Whoo,
my man, yes!
211
00:08:26,907 --> 00:08:28,306
All right, guys,
what's up?
212
00:08:28,308 --> 00:08:28,940
My name is abbi.
213
00:08:28,942 --> 00:08:30,775
I'm going to be your
trainer today.
214
00:08:30,777 --> 00:08:32,010
This is
a joke shirt.
215
00:08:32,012 --> 00:08:32,444
Cool.
216
00:08:32,446 --> 00:08:34,346
All right, I'm going to show you
guys how it's done first
217
00:08:34,348 --> 00:08:38,183
And remember,
form is essential!
218
00:08:38,185 --> 00:08:39,417
Okay.
219
00:08:40,152 --> 00:08:41,653
(shattering)
220
00:08:49,829 --> 00:08:51,897
Get back
in your office.
221
00:08:52,465 --> 00:08:53,932
I don't know what
just happened with my body.
222
00:08:53,934 --> 00:08:56,701
It's like I literally have
zero upper body strength.
223
00:08:56,703 --> 00:08:57,202
Abbi...
224
00:08:57,204 --> 00:08:59,004
That mirror cost $1400
without installation.
225
00:08:59,006 --> 00:09:02,040
Okay, don't accidents happen
all the time in the gym?
226
00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:02,941
Can't the gym just
pay for it?
227
00:09:02,943 --> 00:09:04,543
I can't report this
to corporate, abbi.
228
00:09:04,545 --> 00:09:05,977
You're not
an authorized instructor.
229
00:09:05,979 --> 00:09:08,213
Okay, well, I'll
just take the blame.
230
00:09:08,215 --> 00:09:09,681
I mean, I (bleep)
this up.
231
00:09:09,683 --> 00:09:11,383
Yeah, but I let
you teach the class, abbi.
232
00:09:11,385 --> 00:09:13,151
It's taken me four
years to get where I am,
233
00:09:13,153 --> 00:09:15,253
But they're going to fire
me for this in a second.
234
00:09:15,255 --> 00:09:16,521
Please, abbi, I have
a kid.
235
00:09:16,523 --> 00:09:17,489
What, you do?
Probably!
236
00:09:17,491 --> 00:09:20,892
I mean, a paternity suit
could pop up at any time.
Ugh, okay.
237
00:09:21,994 --> 00:09:23,161
What do we do?
238
00:09:23,163 --> 00:09:24,429
Okay.
239
00:09:24,431 --> 00:09:25,096
We gotta get $1400
240
00:09:25,098 --> 00:09:28,166
And we gotta meet back here
tonight after closing.
241
00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:29,668
We'll install
the mirror together.
242
00:09:29,670 --> 00:09:30,402
I've done it
once before.
243
00:09:30,404 --> 00:09:32,671
Listen, I don't have
700 bucks just lying around.
244
00:09:32,673 --> 00:09:34,539
That's like a whole month's
rent for me.
245
00:09:34,541 --> 00:09:36,374
Do you
have a webcam?
246
00:09:38,611 --> 00:09:39,945
I never ride the subway.
247
00:09:39,947 --> 00:09:41,813
Usually just uber, but
sometimes--
248
00:09:41,815 --> 00:09:45,817
Shh, oliver, we don't talk
about uber down here.
249
00:09:45,819 --> 00:09:47,385
Let's play a game.
250
00:09:47,387 --> 00:09:48,620
I want you to look
around
251
00:09:48,622 --> 00:09:51,423
And find the most
disadvantaged person here
252
00:09:51,425 --> 00:09:53,158
And then we'll give
them our seats.
253
00:09:53,160 --> 00:09:54,693
Who do
you think it is?
254
00:09:56,762 --> 00:09:58,363
It's you, oliver.
255
00:09:58,365 --> 00:09:59,397
Me?
Yes.
256
00:09:59,399 --> 00:10:02,934
You are rich in money,
but poor in experience.
257
00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:05,170
No, I'm poor.
258
00:10:05,172 --> 00:10:05,971
I get the seat.
259
00:10:05,973 --> 00:10:08,039
You are right,
that's right.
260
00:10:08,041 --> 00:10:09,674
There you go.
261
00:10:10,676 --> 00:10:12,077
Lesson learned,
oliver.
262
00:10:12,079 --> 00:10:13,678
Lesson,
uh, learned.
263
00:10:13,680 --> 00:10:15,113
(throat clearing)
264
00:10:15,948 --> 00:10:21,319
♪♪
265
00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:28,893
Okay, okay, abbi,
think, come on.
266
00:10:28,895 --> 00:10:30,195
$700, all right.
267
00:10:30,197 --> 00:10:31,830
Come on, here we go.
268
00:10:33,065 --> 00:10:33,898
Come on.
269
00:10:33,900 --> 00:10:35,300
(breathing deeply)
270
00:10:35,302 --> 00:10:36,935
Sell mushroom chocolates!
271
00:10:36,937 --> 00:10:38,536
No, I can't do that.
272
00:10:38,538 --> 00:10:39,371
Can't get back in
the game.
273
00:10:39,373 --> 00:10:40,939
Just got
my record expunged.
274
00:10:40,941 --> 00:10:42,173
Okay.
275
00:10:45,044 --> 00:10:47,345
(bleep), this
is really warped!
276
00:10:47,347 --> 00:10:52,283
♪♪
277
00:11:00,626 --> 00:11:03,495
(breathing deeply)
ask my parents for money.
278
00:11:03,497 --> 00:11:06,231
No, they think
I'm a successful artist.
279
00:11:09,168 --> 00:11:10,335
Art!
280
00:11:10,337 --> 00:11:11,136
Sell my art!
281
00:11:11,138 --> 00:11:14,139
It's brilliant,
but no one understands it.
282
00:11:16,976 --> 00:11:17,976
Sell my clothes.
283
00:11:17,978 --> 00:11:19,811
I get compliments.
284
00:11:22,148 --> 00:11:23,982
Beacon's closet!
285
00:11:25,518 --> 00:11:27,852
Sell my art
and my clothes!
286
00:11:27,854 --> 00:11:29,521
Yes!
287
00:11:29,523 --> 00:11:30,321
Oh god.
288
00:11:30,323 --> 00:11:32,123
You ever
been to brooklyn?
289
00:11:32,125 --> 00:11:33,158
No.
290
00:11:33,160 --> 00:11:34,159
You ever been
to queens?
291
00:11:34,161 --> 00:11:36,561
No.
Do you ever
been to long island?
292
00:11:36,563 --> 00:11:38,163
Hamptons.
293
00:11:38,664 --> 00:11:40,498
Ooh, she
does not look happy.
294
00:11:40,500 --> 00:11:41,833
Hi.
295
00:11:43,769 --> 00:11:45,170
Clothes.
296
00:11:45,172 --> 00:11:46,438
Hi.
297
00:11:47,740 --> 00:11:48,640
How's it going?
298
00:11:48,642 --> 00:11:51,076
Could you, uh,
wait over there?
299
00:11:51,078 --> 00:11:53,011
Yeah. Okay.
For a minute?
300
00:11:53,013 --> 00:11:54,546
All right.
Thank you.
301
00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:57,682
Good luck,
give it your all.
302
00:11:58,050 --> 00:12:01,653
That one's so pretty,
my mom got it for me.
303
00:12:02,221 --> 00:12:05,623
Well, you know, it smells like
fresh detergent, right?
304
00:12:07,159 --> 00:12:09,294
Oh, that skirt's one
of my favorite pieces.
305
00:12:09,296 --> 00:12:10,995
Um, I got it when I
thought I was gonna
306
00:12:10,997 --> 00:12:12,297
Study abroad
in copenhagen,
307
00:12:12,299 --> 00:12:15,934
But tags are on it, so,
oh, yes, okay.
308
00:12:18,270 --> 00:12:19,404
Okay.
309
00:12:22,374 --> 00:12:24,542
Doesn't feel so good,
does it?
310
00:12:24,544 --> 00:12:26,444
It's so
much harder to walk.
311
00:12:26,446 --> 00:12:28,313
But honestly, your legs
look amazing.
312
00:12:28,315 --> 00:12:30,081
As well as my tukas?
313
00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:35,186
(giggling)
it's tucchus, but I am
loving it, brother.
314
00:12:35,554 --> 00:12:38,323
Oh, I saw a denim jacket
like that
315
00:12:38,325 --> 00:12:39,457
On "who wore it best?"
316
00:12:39,459 --> 00:12:41,626
Leighton meester
wore it best.
So that's it?
317
00:12:41,628 --> 00:12:43,261
There's nothing left?
318
00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:45,196
Um, yeah, just all this
great stuff.
319
00:12:45,198 --> 00:12:45,864
Hmmm...
320
00:12:45,866 --> 00:12:48,466
I like
this apothecary bag.
321
00:12:48,468 --> 00:12:49,634
It's interesting.
322
00:12:49,636 --> 00:12:50,802
Oh, that
was my aunt's.
323
00:12:50,804 --> 00:12:52,771
Um, she wa-she was
a flight attendant.
324
00:12:52,773 --> 00:12:53,905
She died
in that plane crash.
325
00:12:53,907 --> 00:12:55,974
It was terrible over
the midwest.
So sad.
326
00:12:55,976 --> 00:13:01,446
I can give you store credit
for $195 or $20 cash.
327
00:13:08,721 --> 00:13:09,287
All right.
328
00:13:09,289 --> 00:13:12,190
All right, I'll take-
I'll take the cash.
329
00:13:14,593 --> 00:13:16,861
Mmm, that'll
be 35 bucks, babe.
330
00:13:16,863 --> 00:13:18,596
What a bargain!
331
00:13:19,431 --> 00:13:22,400
♪♪
332
00:13:22,402 --> 00:13:24,335
Celebrity's favorite foods.
333
00:13:24,337 --> 00:13:26,104
Original pieces,
people!
334
00:13:26,106 --> 00:13:27,505
Bitch's gotta
buy a mirror here.
335
00:13:27,507 --> 00:13:28,740
Come on, come on!
336
00:13:28,742 --> 00:13:29,541
I did it, ilana.
337
00:13:29,543 --> 00:13:32,610
I gave all the clothes
to the homeless people.
Whoo!
338
00:13:32,612 --> 00:13:33,778
Good job, bud.
339
00:13:33,780 --> 00:13:35,413
Originals.
340
00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:38,349
Tapas.
341
00:13:38,351 --> 00:13:40,118
I'm into them.
342
00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:41,052
How about two?
343
00:13:41,054 --> 00:13:42,253
I mean,
they're 40 bucks.
344
00:13:42,255 --> 00:13:45,190
But I'm feeling really
great right now.
345
00:13:45,192 --> 00:13:45,890
I'm in a great mood.
346
00:13:45,892 --> 00:13:47,225
I'll give you two
for $60.
347
00:13:47,227 --> 00:13:49,060
Love it.
Well, I meant $2.00.
348
00:13:49,062 --> 00:13:50,295
We'll take it.
No way.
349
00:13:50,297 --> 00:13:51,896
Ilana.
No way.
350
00:13:51,898 --> 00:13:52,363
No.
351
00:13:52,365 --> 00:13:56,000
I'm like, what, am I gonna
sell my soul?
It's good to have standards.
352
00:13:56,002 --> 00:13:58,336
$2.00.
Okay, let's do it.
353
00:14:00,306 --> 00:14:01,973
Oh.
That's hysterical.
354
00:14:01,975 --> 00:14:02,974
$40, huh?
355
00:14:02,976 --> 00:14:04,609
Yeah, which is
a really great deal,
356
00:14:04,611 --> 00:14:07,979
Uh, considering the art will
only continue to appreciate.
357
00:14:07,981 --> 00:14:10,849
Of course, shrimp cocktail's
ron howard's favorite food.
358
00:14:10,851 --> 00:14:13,318
He probably has it
three, four times a week,
359
00:14:13,320 --> 00:14:14,485
That (bleep) pussy.
360
00:14:14,487 --> 00:14:16,521
Uh, it's
a fictional series
361
00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:20,058
Based on the artist's
imagination, um--
362
00:14:20,060 --> 00:14:21,459
Wait a minute, you mean
this is not real?
363
00:14:21,461 --> 00:14:24,128
Like bruce springsteen's
favorite food is not a tomato?
364
00:14:24,130 --> 00:14:27,398
No, I mean, he's from jersey,
so I put him with a tomato
365
00:14:27,400 --> 00:14:30,235
'cause I was like, that's a
marriage, you know, that works.
366
00:14:30,237 --> 00:14:32,537
Ah, come on,
this is unbelievable!
367
00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:33,638
What kind of (bleep)
is this?
368
00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:35,440
What?
Is it that unbelievable?
369
00:14:35,442 --> 00:14:37,609
Forty doll-- I give $40,
I'm gonna get a little more
370
00:14:37,611 --> 00:14:39,577
Than artwork from you over
there, sweet cheeks.
371
00:14:39,579 --> 00:14:41,679
Why don't you (bleep)
my (bleep) dick?
372
00:14:41,681 --> 00:14:43,281
Hey, listen,
I've been there, sweetie.
373
00:14:43,283 --> 00:14:44,148
I've been there.
374
00:14:44,150 --> 00:14:45,750
To my dick?
Yeah.
375
00:14:47,686 --> 00:14:49,988
20, 21... Twen--
376
00:14:49,990 --> 00:14:51,856
There's just $22 still.
377
00:14:51,858 --> 00:14:53,157
Okay, I'll
be right back.
378
00:14:53,159 --> 00:14:54,659
Okay, oliver, I want you
to remember
379
00:14:54,661 --> 00:14:56,995
That most of this
day is a secret, okay?
380
00:14:56,997 --> 00:15:00,798
Adults aren't supposed to ask
kids to keep secrets.
381
00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:02,367
Oh.
382
00:15:06,305 --> 00:15:07,839
Hey, guy,
how was your day?
383
00:15:07,841 --> 00:15:09,874
We hung out with abbi,
ilana's girlfriend,
384
00:15:09,876 --> 00:15:12,777
Even though they
can't be together right now.
385
00:15:12,779 --> 00:15:14,779
But they will be someday.
386
00:15:15,614 --> 00:15:16,381
Ilana.
387
00:15:16,383 --> 00:15:18,983
I had no
idea you were gay.
388
00:15:18,985 --> 00:15:19,484
We all...
389
00:15:19,486 --> 00:15:21,119
Having a "gayby"-sitter
will be wonderful
390
00:15:21,121 --> 00:15:23,588
For oliver's cv
to get into middle school.
391
00:15:23,590 --> 00:15:24,155
And get this.
392
00:15:24,157 --> 00:15:26,224
We gave all these clothes to
homeless people
393
00:15:26,226 --> 00:15:28,593
And I thought
I would feel dirty afterwards,
394
00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:30,261
But it was so nice.
395
00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:31,896
How very funky.
396
00:15:31,898 --> 00:15:34,132
You were just talking about how
you're so sick
397
00:15:34,134 --> 00:15:35,934
Of all your
clothes from last season.
398
00:15:35,936 --> 00:15:38,036
Instead of bringing it in
to the stables,
399
00:15:38,038 --> 00:15:39,470
You should
give it all to ilana.
400
00:15:39,472 --> 00:15:42,674
She could probably donate it
for you right now.
401
00:15:42,676 --> 00:15:44,342
Well, I mean on
the one hand,
402
00:15:44,344 --> 00:15:46,511
The horses do get
very cold in the winter,
403
00:15:46,513 --> 00:15:49,247
But on the other, the less
fortunate probably get
404
00:15:49,249 --> 00:15:51,349
Just as cold,
maybe even more so.
405
00:15:51,351 --> 00:15:55,453
Ilana, do you think this is
something you could do for me?
406
00:15:55,455 --> 00:15:57,655
Um, I do
have some stuff...
407
00:15:57,657 --> 00:16:00,758
I'll give you cash for a cab.
Yeah, mm-hmm, sure.
408
00:16:00,760 --> 00:16:02,694
(making kissy sounds)
409
00:16:02,696 --> 00:16:04,429
Yay.
Thank you...
410
00:16:04,431 --> 00:16:06,164
For those kisses.
411
00:16:06,465 --> 00:16:08,132
Come on, dude, I thought
we were cool.
412
00:16:08,134 --> 00:16:11,135
Now I gotta lug all this
(bleep) to some jesus house?
413
00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:12,303
No, you bobo.
414
00:16:12,305 --> 00:16:14,272
My mom's stuff is fancy
as (bleep).
415
00:16:14,274 --> 00:16:17,909
Take it back to beacon's
and sell the (bleep) out of it.
416
00:16:19,111 --> 00:16:21,913
The student has become
the teacher.
417
00:16:21,915 --> 00:16:26,050
Yes, queen, yes, queen,
yes, queen!
418
00:16:26,952 --> 00:16:29,287
(mouthing silently)
yes, queen!
419
00:16:29,655 --> 00:16:32,056
Ilana, do the homeless
like prada?
420
00:16:32,058 --> 00:16:33,858
(oliver)
yes, queen!
421
00:16:34,326 --> 00:16:37,095
♪ where my scallywags at ♪
422
00:16:39,298 --> 00:16:40,665
♪ ready catch ♪
423
00:16:40,667 --> 00:16:43,201
♪ party from the drop until
the sun beams ♪
424
00:16:43,203 --> 00:16:46,704
♪ flying flying from
the loosey in my blood stream ♪
425
00:16:46,706 --> 00:16:49,874
♪ see my people ready now-ow
ready now-ow ♪
426
00:16:49,876 --> 00:16:53,444
♪ my oopa take you
steady now-ow steady now-ow ♪
427
00:16:53,446 --> 00:16:56,280
♪ don't need no drink I think
I'm rolling ♪
428
00:16:56,282 --> 00:16:58,349
(abbi)
oh...
429
00:16:58,351 --> 00:17:00,151
Remember me?
430
00:17:00,986 --> 00:17:02,620
Well, do you
remember me?
431
00:17:02,622 --> 00:17:05,123
Even less.
We were just in here
two hours ago.
432
00:17:05,125 --> 00:17:06,424
Come on.
Well...
433
00:17:06,426 --> 00:17:07,592
...Do you
work on commission?
434
00:17:07,594 --> 00:17:10,762
No.
Yeah, do you work
on commission?
435
00:17:10,764 --> 00:17:11,696
I said no.
436
00:17:11,698 --> 00:17:12,997
I didn't hear it.
437
00:17:12,999 --> 00:17:14,298
Big mistake.
438
00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:15,199
Big.
439
00:17:15,201 --> 00:17:16,234
Huge.
440
00:17:16,236 --> 00:17:18,503
♪♪
441
00:17:18,505 --> 00:17:20,204
Wow.
442
00:17:21,540 --> 00:17:23,174
Remember me now?
443
00:17:23,176 --> 00:17:24,175
We remember you...
444
00:17:24,177 --> 00:17:27,145
'cause your hair
and lipstick looks cute.
445
00:17:27,147 --> 00:17:28,813
Mm-hmm.
446
00:17:31,250 --> 00:17:33,818
I can give you $13,000
in store credit
447
00:17:33,820 --> 00:17:35,053
Or $903 in cash.
448
00:17:35,055 --> 00:17:37,455
Woo-hoo,
store credit for life!
449
00:17:37,457 --> 00:17:38,489
Dude, I need
the money.
450
00:17:38,491 --> 00:17:39,624
Money, right,
money, money.
451
00:17:39,626 --> 00:17:44,028
Speaking of which, how much is
my aunt's timeless, beautiful,
452
00:17:44,030 --> 00:17:46,998
Classic apothecary bag?
453
00:17:47,866 --> 00:17:50,268
$226.
454
00:17:53,872 --> 00:17:56,374
Wonderful.
455
00:17:56,376 --> 00:17:57,141
By the way...
456
00:17:57,143 --> 00:17:58,976
I know that shirt's
from forever 21.
457
00:17:58,978 --> 00:18:00,845
You're not
kidding anybody.
458
00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:03,448
Nice.
459
00:18:07,086 --> 00:18:12,590
♪♪
460
00:18:12,592 --> 00:18:13,991
I got it.
461
00:18:15,194 --> 00:18:16,928
All right, okay.
462
00:18:16,930 --> 00:18:18,496
Okay, ease your grip.
463
00:18:19,565 --> 00:18:22,166
There we go.
464
00:18:22,901 --> 00:18:23,534
Looks good.
465
00:18:23,536 --> 00:18:25,336
Yeah.
They're not gonna know, right?
466
00:18:25,338 --> 00:18:26,804
No one
will ever notice.
467
00:18:26,806 --> 00:18:29,941
I'm going home
and I'm shutting my blinds
468
00:18:29,943 --> 00:18:33,945
And I'm going to go to sleep
like, forever,
469
00:18:33,947 --> 00:18:36,314
Until my
shift at 10:30 today.
470
00:18:36,316 --> 00:18:37,882
Not so fast, muchacha.
471
00:18:37,884 --> 00:18:39,283
I need
you right here.
472
00:18:39,285 --> 00:18:41,686
Trey, there's no way there's
a pube situation.
473
00:18:41,688 --> 00:18:42,854
No one else is here.
474
00:18:42,856 --> 00:18:45,323
Do you put
your pubes somewhere?
475
00:18:45,325 --> 00:18:45,790
No.
476
00:18:45,792 --> 00:18:47,425
You're teaching
a class today.
477
00:18:47,427 --> 00:18:48,960
And it starts in
two hours.
478
00:18:48,962 --> 00:18:49,827
This is a bazinga.
479
00:18:49,829 --> 00:18:52,363
I swear, I've lost
all respect for you, trey.
480
00:18:52,365 --> 00:18:53,264
It's not a bazinga.
481
00:18:53,266 --> 00:18:56,100
Abbi, you're such
a good cleaner.
482
00:18:56,102 --> 00:18:57,101
You're so special.
483
00:18:57,103 --> 00:18:59,203
Plus regina who
normally teaches the class
484
00:18:59,205 --> 00:19:01,772
Has been missing for
48 hours.
485
00:19:01,774 --> 00:19:04,475
Love regina,
but that's awesome.
486
00:19:04,477 --> 00:19:06,144
I mean, I can-- I...
487
00:19:06,146 --> 00:19:09,614
So I'm gonna be,
I'm gonna be a trainer.
488
00:19:09,616 --> 00:19:10,982
Yeah.
Of a class.
489
00:19:10,984 --> 00:19:11,682
Just one class.
490
00:19:11,684 --> 00:19:14,051
But I kinda need
you to leave me alone
491
00:19:14,053 --> 00:19:16,154
In the studio for
a while.
492
00:19:16,156 --> 00:19:19,590
Gotta finish paying off
my half of the mirror.
493
00:19:20,292 --> 00:19:22,059
Okay.
'kay.
494
00:19:27,766 --> 00:19:29,200
What's up, guys?
495
00:19:29,202 --> 00:19:33,571
Are you ready to rise
to your potential?
496
00:19:33,573 --> 00:19:35,339
(class)
yeah!
Let's do this!
497
00:19:35,341 --> 00:19:37,875
Here we go,
yeah, here we go!
498
00:19:37,877 --> 00:19:39,844
Come on, yeah, move
those arms,
499
00:19:39,846 --> 00:19:41,946
Move those legs,
move those arms.
500
00:19:41,948 --> 00:19:42,847
Let's go, guys.
501
00:19:42,849 --> 00:19:44,248
What ignites you?
502
00:19:44,250 --> 00:19:46,817
What fuels your fire?
503
00:19:47,452 --> 00:19:48,152
Oh, you know what?
504
00:19:48,154 --> 00:19:50,521
I'll clean that up later,
don't worry.
505
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:53,858
What's up?
506
00:19:53,860 --> 00:19:55,126
I'm kirk steele.
507
00:19:55,128 --> 00:19:55,860
I'm 18,
508
00:19:55,862 --> 00:19:56,894
I'm from orlando, florida
509
00:19:56,896 --> 00:19:58,062
And my favorite movie
510
00:19:58,064 --> 00:19:58,763
Is "garden state".
511
00:19:58,765 --> 00:20:02,900
Are you ready
to explore the infinite abyss?
512
00:20:02,902 --> 00:20:10,141
♪♪
513
00:20:10,143 --> 00:20:13,177
When I grow up I either want to
be a stunt choreographer
514
00:20:13,179 --> 00:20:15,513
Or I want
to work with kids with ms.
515
00:20:16,481 --> 00:20:21,752
♪♪
516
00:20:25,490 --> 00:20:27,225
Somebody stop me!
517
00:20:27,227 --> 00:20:28,859
Oh (bleep)!
518
00:20:28,861 --> 00:20:29,660
Oh!
519
00:20:29,662 --> 00:20:31,629
I have two twin sisters.
520
00:20:33,332 --> 00:20:34,699
(grunting)
521
00:20:34,701 --> 00:20:37,268
Oh god... Oh god,
(bleep) oh!
522
00:20:37,270 --> 00:20:41,305
Oh, oh, ooh, oh, oh...
523
00:20:41,307 --> 00:20:45,076
Oh, oh, oh, oh...
524
00:20:45,078 --> 00:20:48,179
Uh... Uh!
525
00:20:48,181 --> 00:20:52,883
♪♪
526
00:20:52,885 --> 00:20:55,720
(sniffing)
ooh, I stink.
527
00:21:09,101 --> 00:21:12,637
Ho!
♪ didn't like to do
it again ♪
528
00:21:12,639 --> 00:21:13,204
Ho!
Hey!
529
00:21:13,206 --> 00:21:17,575
♪ everybody singing on the
mississippi riverbend ♪
530
00:21:17,577 --> 00:21:20,544
That was great!
♪ mississippi river
at midnight ♪