1
00:00:07,689 --> 00:00:10,689
[ Music plays indistinctly ]All chanting "Do it" ]

2
00:00:10,689 --> 00:00:11,655
Should we do it?Let's do it!

3
00:00:11,655 --> 00:00:12,655
Let's do it!

4
00:00:12,655 --> 00:00:15,241
[ Indistinct shouting ]

5
00:00:15,241 --> 00:00:16,689
Oh!
Ohh!

6
00:00:16,689 --> 00:00:18,034
Both: Yeah!

7
00:00:18,034 --> 00:00:20,655
Oh, yeah!

8
00:00:20,655 --> 00:00:24,000
Yeah!

9
00:00:24,000 --> 00:00:25,000
Oh!

10
00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:27,068
Huh.
Whoa!

11
00:00:27,068 --> 00:00:28,896
Who-a-a-a!

12
00:00:28,896 --> 00:00:31,000
[ Chuckling ]
Y-e-eah!

13
00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:33,068
Whoa! Oh!
Oh!

14
00:00:33,068 --> 00:00:37,517
[ Both shouting ]

15
00:00:37,517 --> 00:00:41,551
♪♪

16
00:00:41,551 --> 00:00:43,448
Oh!

17
00:00:43,448 --> 00:00:46,172
Whoo!

18
00:00:46,172 --> 00:00:47,827
Oh! Yeah!

19
00:00:47,827 --> 00:00:48,965
Yeah!

20
00:00:48,965 --> 00:00:51,310
[ All cheering ][ Music ends ]

21
00:00:51,310 --> 00:00:52,586
We made a drink!

22
00:00:52,586 --> 00:00:53,965
Yeah!Man: Excuse me.

23
00:00:53,965 --> 00:00:55,724
Excuse me! Hey!

24
00:00:55,724 --> 00:00:58,413
Uh...can I get
a drink here or what.

25
00:00:58,413 --> 00:01:01,620
[ Indistinct conversations ]

26
00:01:01,620 --> 00:01:04,758
[ Music plays faintly ]

27
00:01:04,758 --> 00:01:05,896
Abbi: Here you go.

28
00:01:05,896 --> 00:01:07,482
Happy birthday,
Craig.

29
00:01:07,482 --> 00:01:09,068
Retirement.
Thanks.

30
00:01:09,068 --> 00:01:11,586
[ Chuckles ]

31
00:01:11,586 --> 00:01:12,620
Whoops!

32
00:01:12,620 --> 00:01:14,724
[ Music resumes ]

33
00:01:14,724 --> 00:01:16,620
Ooh!

34
00:01:16,620 --> 00:01:19,103
♪ Four and three and two
and one -- one ♪

35
00:01:19,103 --> 00:01:23,620
♪♪

36
00:01:23,620 --> 00:01:26,655
Lesley: Your ankle
is the size of a grapefruit.

37
00:01:26,655 --> 00:01:28,724
How did you not realize
it was sprained?

38
00:01:28,724 --> 00:01:30,206
I mean, by that point
in the night,

39
00:01:30,206 --> 00:01:32,310
I wasn't feeling much
[Chuckling] of anything.

40
00:01:32,310 --> 00:01:34,586
I learned that tequila
is an upper --

41
00:01:34,586 --> 00:01:36,689
I feel like it was,
like, psychological,

42
00:01:36,689 --> 00:01:38,413
like the Gazebo effect.

43
00:01:38,413 --> 00:01:40,206
Placeboeffect?

44
00:01:40,206 --> 00:01:43,137
Yeah. Yeah.

45
00:01:43,137 --> 00:01:45,241
I thought that you said
you were working.

46
00:01:45,241 --> 00:01:47,896
It was just, like,
a really lame catering gig,

47
00:01:47,896 --> 00:01:49,379
so we were, like,
trying to make the most of it.

48
00:01:49,379 --> 00:01:50,758
Mm-hmm.

49
00:01:50,758 --> 00:01:52,586
Thank you so much
for coming over, Lesley.

50
00:01:52,586 --> 00:01:54,758
You're the best
girlfriend --

51
00:01:54,758 --> 00:01:57,793
Whoa, girlfriend?

52
00:01:57,793 --> 00:02:00,931
Yeah. I mean, or partner.
I like --
You --

53
00:02:00,931 --> 00:02:02,689
I like "girlfriend."
I like girlfr--You know, this --

54
00:02:02,689 --> 00:02:04,862
I think this actually brings up
an interesting point.

55
00:02:04,862 --> 00:02:07,000
"Partner." Yeah.
"Partner" is more lesbian.

56
00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:09,965
No, no. Abbi --
Please don't -- Abbi.I -- I -- Like, I know this now.

57
00:02:09,965 --> 00:02:12,137
I actually think that...

58
00:02:12,137 --> 00:02:15,310
that we should
stop doing...

59
00:02:15,310 --> 00:02:17,517
this.

60
00:02:17,517 --> 00:02:19,000
Wait, okay. Okay.

61
00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:21,448
Is this about the --
the "placebo" thing --

62
00:02:21,448 --> 00:02:28,448
No, Abbi, it's...
It's a lot bigger than that.

63
00:02:28,448 --> 00:02:29,965
♪♪

64
00:02:29,965 --> 00:02:32,103
[ Horn honks in distance ]

65
00:02:32,103 --> 00:02:33,482
♪ The mail, the mail ♪

66
00:02:33,482 --> 00:02:34,724
♪ The mail ♪

67
00:02:34,724 --> 00:02:38,482
[ Clattering ]♪ The mail ♪

68
00:02:38,482 --> 00:02:40,344
Whoa, Yale.

69
00:02:40,344 --> 00:02:41,620
Too Kavanaugh.

70
00:02:41,620 --> 00:02:43,793
Cornell? [ Laughs ]
You wish.

71
00:02:43,793 --> 00:02:45,379
Dartmouth.
Too goyish.

72
00:02:45,379 --> 00:02:46,482
[ Gasps ]

73
00:02:46,482 --> 00:02:48,827
Okay!!

74
00:02:48,827 --> 00:02:50,344
Here it is!

75
00:02:50,344 --> 00:02:52,517
Hunter freaking College, bish.

76
00:02:52,517 --> 00:02:54,517
And...

77
00:02:54,517 --> 00:02:55,517
[ Gasps ]

78
00:02:55,517 --> 00:02:58,310
[ Screams, laughs ]

79
00:02:58,310 --> 00:03:01,172
I'm in, Hunter College.
I'm freaking in!

80
00:03:01,172 --> 00:03:02,379
Master's, bitch.

81
00:03:02,379 --> 00:03:04,827
Doctorate, bitch.
MD, bitch.

82
00:03:04,827 --> 00:03:06,862
Well, Master's.

83
00:03:06,862 --> 00:03:08,689
[ Horn honks in distance ]Whoo! Grad student.

84
00:03:08,689 --> 00:03:10,758
[ Laughs ]

85
00:03:10,758 --> 00:03:15,344
Acceptance letter, mm!
Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm!

86
00:03:15,344 --> 00:03:17,551
Whoo!

87
00:03:17,551 --> 00:03:20,413
[ Keyboard clacking ]

88
00:03:20,413 --> 00:03:30,379
♪♪

89
00:03:30,379 --> 00:03:32,241
Hello.

90
00:03:32,241 --> 00:03:35,413
Can I help you?

91
00:03:35,413 --> 00:03:38,758
I hear you offer
student discounts.

92
00:03:38,758 --> 00:03:40,724
So, we can't give you
a student discount

93
00:03:40,724 --> 00:03:44,275
if you don't have a student ID,
and this isn't a student ID.

94
00:03:44,275 --> 00:03:46,551
Okay, but this says
that I willbe a student

95
00:03:46,551 --> 00:03:47,655
in like three months.

96
00:03:47,655 --> 00:03:48,827
Oh, three months?

97
00:03:48,827 --> 00:03:50,103
Oh, that's almost as long

98
00:03:50,103 --> 00:03:51,724
as we've been having
this conversation.

99
00:03:51,724 --> 00:03:54,241
Okay, Zahm Zena.
Do we have a beef?

100
00:03:54,241 --> 00:03:55,793
Oh, my God, miss?

101
00:03:55,793 --> 00:03:58,551
-Okay. Jesus. I'm leaving.
-Oh, no, you're not.

102
00:03:58,551 --> 00:04:01,344
Your hair.
It's perfect.

103
00:04:01,344 --> 00:04:04,586
The curls are so plump
yet so light.

104
00:04:04,586 --> 00:04:06,517
[ Laughs ] Moi?

105
00:04:06,517 --> 00:04:08,482
Merci beaucoup,
monsieur.

106
00:04:08,482 --> 00:04:10,103
I know this is crazy,

107
00:04:10,103 --> 00:04:13,517
but would you consider
modeling for us?
Stop.

108
00:04:13,517 --> 00:04:15,482
Okay, stop. Is this some sort
of perverted prank?

109
00:04:15,482 --> 00:04:17,275
Are you in on this --
'Cause you've been a
bitch the whole time?

110
00:04:17,275 --> 00:04:19,931
I know this is last-minute,
but we're doing a shoot tonight.

111
00:04:19,931 --> 00:04:23,000
[ Gasps ]

112
00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:24,448
You know what?
I think that'll be good.

113
00:04:24,448 --> 00:04:26,793
Perfection --
Just like your curls.

114
00:04:26,793 --> 00:04:29,586
[ Laughs ]See you back here at 6:00 --
and be camera ready.

115
00:04:29,586 --> 00:04:32,000
Okay, 6:00 P.M.,
camera ready.

116
00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:33,827
Oh, my God,
did you see that?

117
00:04:33,827 --> 00:04:35,068
That was amazing.

118
00:04:35,068 --> 00:04:36,758
I'm on a call right now.
I can't talk.

119
00:04:36,758 --> 00:04:38,482
Okay, something seems
very locked up inside of you,

120
00:04:38,482 --> 00:04:40,586
so when you decide to change
your life with therapy,

121
00:04:40,586 --> 00:04:42,000
give mea call.

122
00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:44,000
♪♪

123
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:45,482
I don't understand.

124
00:04:45,482 --> 00:04:48,655
Like, Lesley,
I-I like you so much.

125
00:04:48,655 --> 00:04:50,724
We're just not
on the same page.

126
00:04:50,724 --> 00:04:51,965
I'm a doctor.

127
00:04:51,965 --> 00:04:53,758
I do jiu-jitsu
and have hobbies.

128
00:04:53,758 --> 00:04:55,275
And you...

129
00:04:55,275 --> 00:04:57,896
You just don't really feel
like an adult yet.

130
00:04:57,896 --> 00:05:00,448
And I'm sure
your life is fun,

131
00:05:00,448 --> 00:05:04,482
but it's really just kind of
a series of wild shenanigans.

132
00:05:04,482 --> 00:05:06,827
Wow.

133
00:05:06,827 --> 00:05:08,413
Shenanigans?

134
00:05:08,413 --> 00:05:12,827
You're 20s are for...
wild "shenanigans."

135
00:05:12,827 --> 00:05:15,689
But aren't you 30?

136
00:05:15,689 --> 00:05:17,482
Wow, wow.
You're fucking nuts, Lesley!

137
00:05:17,482 --> 00:05:19,103
What?!Yeah. Yeah, you're nuts.

138
00:05:19,103 --> 00:05:22,413
I'm just saying that you need
to grow up a little bit.

139
00:05:22,413 --> 00:05:24,137
Mm. Okay. Yeah.
No, no, no. Yeah.

140
00:05:24,137 --> 00:05:25,965
You know what --
I write thank-you notes

141
00:05:25,965 --> 00:05:27,379
all the time.

142
00:05:27,379 --> 00:05:29,068
And my phone screen
isn't even cracked.

143
00:05:29,068 --> 00:05:30,827
And guess what, Lesley?
I'm going to a play today.

144
00:05:30,827 --> 00:05:32,931
I'm going to a matinée.Yeah, with Ilana's parents,

145
00:05:32,931 --> 00:05:34,586
who, I'm assuming,
paid for the tickets.

146
00:05:34,586 --> 00:05:36,517
Actually, you know what, Lesley?
I think that we're done.

147
00:05:36,517 --> 00:05:38,413
I think that you should
get out of my house.

148
00:05:38,413 --> 00:05:40,793
Finally on the same page
about something.

149
00:05:40,793 --> 00:05:44,655
You know what?

150
00:05:44,655 --> 00:05:47,896
Why don't you take
your ugly-ass hat back, too.

151
00:05:47,896 --> 00:05:49,758
Fine. I will.

152
00:05:49,758 --> 00:05:51,310
[ Scoffs ]
Of course it looks cute on you.

153
00:05:51,310 --> 00:05:53,310
Whatever.
God!

154
00:05:53,310 --> 00:05:55,862
[ Glass cracking ]Oh, shit!

155
00:05:55,862 --> 00:05:57,206
Great.
Well, thanks a lot.

156
00:05:57,206 --> 00:05:58,413
Now I dohave a crack
in my screen,

157
00:05:58,413 --> 00:05:59,689
thanks to your
stupid boot.

158
00:05:59,689 --> 00:06:01,965
Oh, did the wig not
protect it?

159
00:06:01,965 --> 00:06:03,655
[ Door slams ]

160
00:06:03,655 --> 00:06:05,689
[ Grunts ]
It didn't.

161
00:06:05,689 --> 00:06:09,241
♪♪

162
00:06:09,241 --> 00:06:13,379
DevaCurl?!
Oh, my freakin' God, Ilana!

163
00:06:13,379 --> 00:06:15,896
I know. I know!You're gonna be a model.

164
00:06:15,896 --> 00:06:18,172
I literally could not
have done this without you guys.

165
00:06:18,172 --> 00:06:20,103
[ Gasps ] Also, I got
into grad school today.

166
00:06:20,103 --> 00:06:21,482
What?
That's fantastic.

167
00:06:21,482 --> 00:06:24,310
DevaCurl! Ah! Oh!
I'm coming to the shoot.

168
00:06:24,310 --> 00:06:27,137
Of course you're coming.
You're my number-one curl inspo.

169
00:06:27,137 --> 00:06:29,551
[ Sighing ]
DevaCurl. Ah.

170
00:06:29,551 --> 00:06:31,206
DevaCurl![ Tires screeching ]

171
00:06:31,206 --> 00:06:34,034
Devacu-u-u-u...

172
00:06:34,034 --> 00:06:35,482
[ Screaming continues
in distance ]

173
00:06:35,482 --> 00:06:38,793
[ Screaming fades ]

174
00:06:38,793 --> 00:06:40,241
...uuuuuuuur--

175
00:06:42,586 --> 00:06:44,482
[ Sniffs ]

176
00:06:44,482 --> 00:06:47,724
[ Chuckles ]
LOL, NYC.

177
00:06:50,379 --> 00:06:52,206
[ Camera shutter clicks ]Yeah. That is adult.

178
00:06:52,206 --> 00:06:55,482
Whoo! She got the plaid slacks.
She got the pink sweater.

179
00:06:55,482 --> 00:06:57,206
She got the tortoise-shell
clip, bish.

180
00:06:57,206 --> 00:06:59,620
Yass! I love it!
-Oh, my gosh. Hold on.

181
00:06:59,620 --> 00:07:01,275
Is this
a grad student?

182
00:07:01,275 --> 00:07:03,172
Oh, well, mm...
Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Mm!

183
00:07:03,172 --> 00:07:05,413
Yes!I'm so proud of you, dude.

184
00:07:05,413 --> 00:07:07,103
Congrats![ Squeals ] Thank you!

185
00:07:07,103 --> 00:07:09,689
And you must be
my sexy professor.

186
00:07:09,689 --> 00:07:12,068
[ Chuckles ]Wow, Lesley is a true monster

187
00:07:12,068 --> 00:07:14,413
if she can break up with you
looking like this.

188
00:07:14,413 --> 00:07:16,896
Yeah, well...
she said I'm not "adult" enough

189
00:07:16,896 --> 00:07:18,413
for her, so --
Oh!

190
00:07:18,413 --> 00:07:21,275
I didn't realize
she was a fucking heinous bitch.

191
00:07:21,275 --> 00:07:23,172
She smells like
fucking shit.

192
00:07:23,172 --> 00:07:24,517
She doesn't smell
like shit.

193
00:07:24,517 --> 00:07:25,965
Always hated her --
never liked her.

194
00:07:25,965 --> 00:07:27,724
Listen, it's fine,
because I have been flooding

195
00:07:27,724 --> 00:07:30,413
my Instagram account
with adult-ass pics all day

196
00:07:30,413 --> 00:07:32,379
so she can see what
she's missing out on.

197
00:07:32,379 --> 00:07:34,931
Wow. I love it.
Hence The New Yorker.

198
00:07:34,931 --> 00:07:37,241
Hence The New Yorker,
indeed.

199
00:07:37,241 --> 00:07:39,068
Whatever.
Enough about Lesley, okay?

200
00:07:39,068 --> 00:07:41,517
Okay, so, um...
I am scared

201
00:07:41,517 --> 00:07:42,931
that my brother
is leaving the city.

202
00:07:42,931 --> 00:07:44,724
You know, I-I know
that he's obviously going

203
00:07:44,724 --> 00:07:46,896
to be the perfect
Jewish-Canadian VJ --
Wait.

204
00:07:46,896 --> 00:07:49,517
I'm sorry.
Is your eye okay?

205
00:07:49,517 --> 00:07:50,931
I'm just going for,
like, a structured

206
00:07:50,931 --> 00:07:52,793
architectural brow today.No, no.

207
00:07:52,793 --> 00:07:54,758
Like, it's red.
It looks really irritated.

208
00:07:54,758 --> 00:07:56,620
Yeah, I got this, like,
AC drop in my eye before.

209
00:07:56,620 --> 00:07:58,068
It was just, like,
air conditioning pre-cum --

210
00:07:58,068 --> 00:07:59,517
like Ninja Turtle juice.

211
00:07:59,517 --> 00:08:01,137
It's fine.

212
00:08:01,137 --> 00:08:02,793
Is it, though?
[ Stammers ]

213
00:08:02,793 --> 00:08:05,413
Yeah, I'll just flush it out
when I cry at the play later.

214
00:08:05,413 --> 00:08:07,896
[ Gasps ]
O-o-oh!

215
00:08:07,896 --> 00:08:10,586
[ Laughs ]
Oh, my God!

216
00:08:10,586 --> 00:08:14,000
I didn't tell you
the best news of all.

217
00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:17,931
Lordy, lordy...
♪ 'Cause Janet be 40 ♪

218
00:08:17,931 --> 00:08:21,586
Yep, yep, yep, yep!
Whoo-whoo!

219
00:08:21,586 --> 00:08:24,172
What?
Girl, I got scouted...

220
00:08:24,172 --> 00:08:26,827
to model...
for Devachan.

221
00:08:26,827 --> 00:08:28,931
Okay? Whoo!

222
00:08:28,931 --> 00:08:30,655
This is the Vision Board.That's it.

223
00:08:30,655 --> 00:08:31,655
Yes!Yes!

224
00:08:31,655 --> 00:08:33,793
[ Both laugh ]

225
00:08:33,793 --> 00:08:39,137
♪♪

226
00:08:39,137 --> 00:08:41,413
[ Indistinct talking ]

227
00:08:41,413 --> 00:08:44,413
[ Horn blares in distance ]Oh, here she is!

228
00:08:44,413 --> 00:08:49,344
My star --
my DevaCurl star.

229
00:08:49,344 --> 00:08:50,793
No, we had
a wild night.

230
00:08:50,793 --> 00:08:53,827
Eliot, your sister
is a DevaCurl hair model!

231
00:08:53,827 --> 00:08:55,931
I mean, this is really,
very exciting

232
00:08:55,931 --> 00:08:57,517
about the modeling,
but, please...[ Cellphone shutter clicking ]

233
00:08:57,517 --> 00:09:00,137
...let us not forget
this is Eliot's special day.

234
00:09:00,137 --> 00:09:02,344
[ Voice breaking ]
It is bon voyage to New York.

235
00:09:02,344 --> 00:09:03,931
My favorite neighborhood,
no less...

236
00:09:03,931 --> 00:09:06,034
the Theater District.[ Horn honks in distance ]

237
00:09:06,034 --> 00:09:07,896
Would it kill you to put
a smile on your pretty face?[ Clicks continue ]

238
00:09:07,896 --> 00:09:10,344
You have a simply
spectacular smile...

239
00:09:10,344 --> 00:09:12,689
my sweet baby.Hey, hey, hey, lady.

240
00:09:12,689 --> 00:09:14,000
You want a picture
with my daughter?

241
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:16,000
She's a very famous
hair model.

242
00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:17,827
Can we just go inside,
please?

243
00:09:17,827 --> 00:09:19,896
Yeah, you know,
we got to cash in on this, El.

244
00:09:19,896 --> 00:09:21,482
I mean, one of those
whats-their-faces

245
00:09:21,482 --> 00:09:23,896
is worth, like,
a billion dollars.

246
00:09:23,896 --> 00:09:25,827
Ilana: You know,
you really should be

247
00:09:25,827 --> 00:09:28,034
putting weight
on the good foot.

248
00:09:28,034 --> 00:09:30,034
Yeah, but it's --
I wanted the heel,

249
00:09:30,034 --> 00:09:31,896
so it just, like, works.

250
00:09:31,896 --> 00:09:34,482
Look at how fast you're going.
Good job.

251
00:09:34,482 --> 00:09:37,137
Hey, girls.

252
00:09:37,137 --> 00:09:40,172
Hungry?[ Both laugh ]

253
00:09:40,172 --> 00:09:41,344
She's a professional.

254
00:09:41,344 --> 00:09:50,241
♪♪

255
00:09:50,241 --> 00:09:59,206
♪♪

256
00:09:59,206 --> 00:10:01,827
Someone's making
a dank Instagram story.

257
00:10:01,827 --> 00:10:03,758
Yes, it's a story
about a grown

258
00:10:03,758 --> 00:10:06,379
[Victorian English accent]
woman at the theater.

259
00:10:06,379 --> 00:10:07,827
[Victorian English accent]
Theater, yes.

260
00:10:07,827 --> 00:10:09,896
-It's starting.
-Damn it.

261
00:10:09,896 --> 00:10:11,482
♪♪

262
00:10:11,482 --> 00:10:15,206
Man: I'm so sick
of this attic!

263
00:10:15,206 --> 00:10:18,034
Walk it off, Anne Frank!

264
00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:19,482
Shh!

265
00:10:19,482 --> 00:10:22,655
♪♪

266
00:10:22,655 --> 00:10:24,379
[ Applause ]

267
00:10:24,379 --> 00:10:25,827
Announcer: Please enjoy
a brief intermission.Wow.

268
00:10:25,827 --> 00:10:27,827
[ Voice breaking ] Wow.
[ Inhales sharply ]

269
00:10:27,827 --> 00:10:29,241
They're gonna win
that Tony.

270
00:10:29,241 --> 00:10:34,551
Oh, my God. Dude...
Does your eye stink?

271
00:10:34,551 --> 00:10:35,827
[ Squelch ]

272
00:10:35,827 --> 00:10:37,241
[ Sniffs ] Hoo!

273
00:10:37,241 --> 00:10:39,379
Yeah, it stinks.What's going --

274
00:10:39,379 --> 00:10:41,379
Holy shit!
Ilana...

275
00:10:41,379 --> 00:10:43,241
[ Sniffs ] It smells
like prosciutt.

276
00:10:43,241 --> 00:10:45,379
You cannot go to
the DevaCurl shoot like this.

277
00:10:45,379 --> 00:10:46,758
You got to go to a doctor
right away

278
00:10:46,758 --> 00:10:49,379
and get this cleared up,
for the family honor!

279
00:10:49,379 --> 00:10:51,137
Doctor? I don't have
a "doctor" "here."

280
00:10:51,137 --> 00:10:52,655
Wait, you don't have
a doctor here?

281
00:10:52,655 --> 00:10:54,724
No one in the city does.
That's why it's a cesspool.

282
00:10:54,724 --> 00:10:56,517
All right, it's an emergency!
Go to the emergency room.

283
00:10:56,517 --> 00:10:58,068
Go to St. Vincent's.
-It's condos.

284
00:10:58,068 --> 00:10:59,689
-All right, so Cabrini!
-Also condos.

285
00:10:59,689 --> 00:11:01,551
How 'bout that what's-his-name
doctor on Houston St.?

286
00:11:01,551 --> 00:11:03,000
It's not condos,
but it's a Whole Foods.

287
00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:04,724
[ Sighs ]
Again,
why do you love this city?

288
00:11:04,724 --> 00:11:06,103
[ Coughs ]
You got to get an ambulance.

289
00:11:06,103 --> 00:11:08,034
You -- You smell like
a dog's ass.

290
00:11:08,034 --> 00:11:08,862
What'd you say?

291
00:11:08,862 --> 00:11:09,793
A dog's ass.

292
00:11:09,793 --> 00:11:11,551
Dog's ass --
That's it?

293
00:11:11,551 --> 00:11:13,310
What?
Mwah!

294
00:11:13,310 --> 00:11:15,241
Dude...Okay, I know who can cure me.
I got this.

295
00:11:15,241 --> 00:11:16,793
Oh, I hope so.

296
00:11:16,793 --> 00:11:19,206
♪ Uh ♪Oh, God.

297
00:11:19,206 --> 00:11:22,862
...!
Come on.

298
00:11:22,862 --> 00:11:29,000
♪♪

299
00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:31,310
Hey, can you drive me downtown
and just weave

300
00:11:31,310 --> 00:11:32,620
in and out of traffic
very fast?

301
00:11:32,620 --> 00:11:34,379
Listen,
I'm not a pedicab driver.

302
00:11:34,379 --> 00:11:36,275
I'm a real estate broker.
Read the sign.

303
00:11:36,275 --> 00:11:38,103
[ Horn honks ]Okay, then why do you
have a pedicab?

304
00:11:38,103 --> 00:11:39,931
It's the fastest way
to get clients

305
00:11:39,931 --> 00:11:41,896
to apartments
for multiple viewing.

306
00:11:41,896 --> 00:11:44,379
You know, I think
I-I know you.

307
00:11:44,379 --> 00:11:46,172
Are you a cop?
No.

308
00:11:46,172 --> 00:11:49,206
Oh.But you showed my friend and I
an apartment years ago,

309
00:11:49,206 --> 00:11:50,827
a bunch of shitty apartment.

310
00:11:50,827 --> 00:11:53,310
I mean, they were
all literal crime scenes.

311
00:11:53,310 --> 00:11:55,482
Oh, yeah, crime scene homes
are my speciality.

312
00:11:55,482 --> 00:11:57,724
You know, I got an ex
that works in the NYPD.

313
00:11:57,724 --> 00:11:59,241
He hooks me up.

314
00:11:59,241 --> 00:12:00,827
I just give him a hand job
once and a while.

315
00:12:00,827 --> 00:12:02,793
Okay, since we have a history
can I please get a ride?

316
00:12:02,793 --> 00:12:04,724
This is a modeling
emergency.

317
00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:06,965
Look, I've been pedaling
my butt off all day.

318
00:12:06,965 --> 00:12:08,172
I mean, look at my feet.

319
00:12:08,172 --> 00:12:10,655
Oh, Jesus Christ.

320
00:12:10,655 --> 00:12:12,620
Wait a minute.
Flex that thigh.

321
00:12:12,620 --> 00:12:14,206
Whoopsie!

322
00:12:14,206 --> 00:12:15,724
I can see your short
and curlies.

323
00:12:15,724 --> 00:12:17,103
[ Laughs ]
Let's go!

324
00:12:17,103 --> 00:12:18,275
[ Grunts ]

325
00:12:18,275 --> 00:12:19,482
[ Bell dings ]Damn.

326
00:12:19,482 --> 00:12:21,034
There you go.
You got it.

327
00:12:21,034 --> 00:12:23,103
You should see your ass
from back here.

328
00:12:23,103 --> 00:12:26,275
It's amazing.
It looks like a big heart.

329
00:12:26,275 --> 00:12:29,344
Thank you, Pam --
Move! Scram!
Oh, let's go!

330
00:12:29,344 --> 00:12:31,137
We have a medical
emergency!

331
00:12:31,137 --> 00:12:33,206
Look out for the baby --
the baby!Get out of the way!

332
00:12:33,206 --> 00:12:34,310
[ Screams ]

333
00:12:34,310 --> 00:12:37,206
[ Clattering ]

334
00:12:37,206 --> 00:12:40,172
Well, well, well, Lesley.[ Cellphone shutter clicking ]

335
00:12:40,172 --> 00:12:42,655
One of these babies
could've been yours.

336
00:12:42,655 --> 00:12:44,689
[ Smacks lips ] Shit.

337
00:12:44,689 --> 00:12:46,793
Lighting is terrible
in here.

338
00:12:46,793 --> 00:12:50,103
Gotta find another
light...source.

339
00:12:50,103 --> 00:12:53,965
[ Indistinct talking
in distance ]

340
00:12:53,965 --> 00:12:55,655
[ Groans ]

341
00:12:55,655 --> 00:13:00,206
[ Music plays in distance ]

342
00:13:00,206 --> 00:13:02,172
Yes! Daylight.

343
00:13:02,172 --> 00:13:03,448
[ Grunts ]

344
00:13:03,448 --> 00:13:04,862
Here we go.

345
00:13:04,862 --> 00:13:07,413
Lesley's not gonna know
what hit her.

346
00:13:07,413 --> 00:13:09,448
[ Cellphone shutter clicks ][ Screams ]

347
00:13:09,448 --> 00:13:11,758
[ Groans, screams ]

348
00:13:11,758 --> 00:13:13,862
[ Panting ]

349
00:13:13,862 --> 00:13:16,517
[ Siren wails in distance ]

350
00:13:16,517 --> 00:13:19,000
Shenanigans.
[ Sighs ]

351
00:13:21,137 --> 00:13:22,448
[ Groans ]
Oh, sh--

352
00:13:22,448 --> 00:13:23,689
Okay.

353
00:13:23,689 --> 00:13:26,206
[ Cellphone vibrates ]

354
00:13:26,206 --> 00:13:27,862
Oh, my God. Yes.

355
00:13:27,862 --> 00:13:31,206
Ah! Yes!

356
00:13:31,206 --> 00:13:32,379
Ow!

357
00:13:32,379 --> 00:13:34,482
Hello? Somebody?

358
00:13:34,482 --> 00:13:35,827
H-Hello?

359
00:13:35,827 --> 00:13:38,137
Abbi?
It's Lesley.

360
00:13:38,137 --> 00:13:43,448
[ Exhales sharply ]
Hey. Lesley.

361
00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:45,137
[ Laughs ]

362
00:13:45,137 --> 00:13:47,758
What's up...girl?

363
00:13:47,758 --> 00:13:51,137
♪♪

364
00:13:51,137 --> 00:13:52,620
[ Dogs barking in distance ]

365
00:13:52,620 --> 00:13:54,034
Okay, I'm sorry.

366
00:13:54,034 --> 00:13:56,137
I have to go before you.
I'm a model.

367
00:13:56,137 --> 00:13:57,517
[ Sighs ]

368
00:13:57,517 --> 00:14:00,827
The doctor's with a patient!Yeah, I'm a model.

369
00:14:00,827 --> 00:14:03,172
S-Stop!

370
00:14:03,172 --> 00:14:05,034
Doctor --
Ohh! Sorry.

371
00:14:05,034 --> 00:14:06,620
Ilana, I told you --

372
00:14:06,620 --> 00:14:10,034
I can not spay-neuter a human,
and it is not reversible.

373
00:14:10,034 --> 00:14:12,517
No, I-I Googled that --
you were right about it.

374
00:14:12,517 --> 00:14:14,103
[ Inhales sharply ]
I'm here about this.

375
00:14:14,103 --> 00:14:15,586
♪♪

376
00:14:15,586 --> 00:14:18,379
Ugh. Okay.[ Dog whines ]

377
00:14:18,379 --> 00:14:20,896
That looks bad.
Have a seat.

378
00:14:20,896 --> 00:14:22,724
Okay, good girl.
Good girl.[ Dog whimpers ]

379
00:14:22,724 --> 00:14:24,275
[Groaning ] Good --
Good girl!

380
00:14:24,275 --> 00:14:27,931
Well, I actually wanted
to apologize to you.

381
00:14:27,931 --> 00:14:29,379
For before.

382
00:14:29,379 --> 00:14:31,344
[ Panting ]
Oh, yeah, yeah.

383
00:14:31,344 --> 00:14:32,862
Oh, did you see
my Instagram?

384
00:14:32,862 --> 00:14:33,827
[ Chuckles ]

385
00:14:33,827 --> 00:14:35,000
What?

386
00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:37,034
Never mind.
Wh-Wh-What's up?

387
00:14:37,034 --> 00:14:43,586
Look, the truth is,
I'm really set in my ways,

388
00:14:43,586 --> 00:14:46,689
and maybe I'm self-sabotaging
this whole things

389
00:14:46,689 --> 00:14:49,344
because I have a lot
of fun with you --

390
00:14:49,344 --> 00:14:50,965
shenanigans and all.

391
00:14:50,965 --> 00:14:53,310
I mean, who am I
to judge the way you live?

392
00:14:53,310 --> 00:14:55,206
You know, you're --
you're figuring it out.[ Horn honks in distance ]

393
00:14:55,206 --> 00:14:59,068
[ Exhales sharply ] Wow.
Well, thanks --

394
00:14:59,068 --> 00:15:00,517
I mean, thank you
for saying that.

395
00:15:00,517 --> 00:15:02,758
I -- [ Sighs ]

396
00:15:02,758 --> 00:15:05,137
You really hurt my feelings
this morning.

397
00:15:05,137 --> 00:15:07,931
I know,
and I'm so sorry.

398
00:15:07,931 --> 00:15:11,793
Do you think there's any way
that we can try this again?

399
00:15:11,793 --> 00:15:13,758
You mean, like,
get back together?

400
00:15:13,758 --> 00:15:16,310
Yes. I'd really like
to keep seeing you, Abbi.

401
00:15:16,310 --> 00:15:17,758
I think you're great.

402
00:15:17,758 --> 00:15:19,482
Well, I think
you're great, too.

403
00:15:19,482 --> 00:15:23,827
I mean, [grunts]
what are you, uh...

404
00:15:23,827 --> 00:15:27,896
What are you
doing tonight?

405
00:15:27,896 --> 00:15:30,620
Well, I think
I may have a date

406
00:15:30,620 --> 00:15:34,586
with my very adult,
very sexy artist girlfriend.

407
00:15:34,586 --> 00:15:37,793
Yeah. I mean,
I'm down to...

408
00:15:37,793 --> 00:15:39,448
hang.

409
00:15:39,448 --> 00:15:43,344
Um, before we lock in
any logistics...

410
00:15:43,344 --> 00:15:46,034
I've, u-um...

411
00:15:46,034 --> 00:15:48,551
gotten myself in
a little bit of trouble.

412
00:15:48,551 --> 00:15:50,517
[ Laughs ]

413
00:15:50,517 --> 00:15:53,862
But, uh, I do need --
I do need you to call 9-1-1.

414
00:15:53,862 --> 00:15:55,655
What? And then you know what?

415
00:15:55,655 --> 00:15:58,068
You pick dinner.
It's totally on you.

416
00:15:58,068 --> 00:15:59,448
I'm cool with whatever.

417
00:15:59,448 --> 00:16:01,689
Jesus Christ, Abbi.

418
00:16:01,689 --> 00:16:04,551
[ Dogs barking in distance ]You know, I've gotten
New York City water droplets

419
00:16:04,551 --> 00:16:06,482
in my mouth before,
and I was fine.

420
00:16:06,482 --> 00:16:09,206
I did have bloody stool
for a week or two,

421
00:16:09,206 --> 00:16:11,137
but that's pretty typical
for me in the summer.

422
00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:13,344
Well, thisis
conjunctivitis.

423
00:16:13,344 --> 00:16:14,827
No!
Yes.

424
00:16:14,827 --> 00:16:16,758
You cannot get any closer
than this to anyone.

425
00:16:16,758 --> 00:16:18,551
Please!
I have a photoshoot tonight.

426
00:16:18,551 --> 00:16:19,896
What if I'm paired
with a curly-haired,

427
00:16:19,896 --> 00:16:21,724
non-binary model,
and it's a love scene?

428
00:16:21,724 --> 00:16:23,206
And a little bit of a pinch.Mm!

429
00:16:23,206 --> 00:16:24,862
One, two, three.

430
00:16:24,862 --> 00:16:27,034
Okay.
Hey! Thank you.
[ Inhales sharply ]

431
00:16:27,034 --> 00:16:28,413
Okay, so this is gonna
clear up my eye

432
00:16:28,413 --> 00:16:30,206
and make me "gorgus"
for the evening.

433
00:16:30,206 --> 00:16:33,413
No, that's your third round
of Hep B shots.
Oh.

434
00:16:33,413 --> 00:16:35,310
You have another one scheduled
for next month.
Okay.

435
00:16:35,310 --> 00:16:36,655
I'm gonna write you
a prescription.

436
00:16:36,655 --> 00:16:38,310
And this is gonna
clear your eye up

437
00:16:38,310 --> 00:16:39,965
in about two weeks.

438
00:16:39,965 --> 00:16:42,862
Two fuggin' weeks?!
No, no, no!

439
00:16:42,862 --> 00:16:44,965
Look, honey,
I'm a model now,

440
00:16:44,965 --> 00:16:47,034
and this here
is my money maker.

441
00:16:47,034 --> 00:16:48,724
Don't you have
something quicker, like...

442
00:16:48,724 --> 00:16:51,241
bovine growth hormone that
Madonna shoves up her crack?

443
00:16:51,241 --> 00:16:53,655
I need something that will
clear me up tonight.Shh, shh, shh, shh!

444
00:16:53,655 --> 00:16:55,413
There is one option.[ Dance music plays ]

445
00:16:55,413 --> 00:16:57,000
Louis: Work those curls, Mama.[ Camera shutter clicking ]

446
00:16:57,000 --> 00:16:59,068
Nasty little duet. Yeah!

447
00:16:59,068 --> 00:17:00,758
Kinky, kinky.

448
00:17:00,758 --> 00:17:03,310
Give me a...realness.
Volume, volume.

449
00:17:03,310 --> 00:17:06,586
Yes. Work it, Mama.
Yeah, Shirley Temple.

450
00:17:06,586 --> 00:17:08,862
Now lose the glasses, baby.

451
00:17:08,862 --> 00:17:11,310
♪♪

452
00:17:11,310 --> 00:17:12,793
Uh --
Cut the music!

453
00:17:12,793 --> 00:17:14,206
[ Music stops ]What's with the patch?

454
00:17:14,206 --> 00:17:15,448
What is this?

455
00:17:15,448 --> 00:17:17,689
Today I'm serving, um...

456
00:17:17,689 --> 00:17:19,275
"Kill Bill" realness.

457
00:17:19,275 --> 00:17:21,413
Yeah, more like
Bob Costas realness.

458
00:17:21,413 --> 00:17:23,413
Lose the patch.

459
00:17:23,413 --> 00:17:26,137
You don't want to see
what's under here.

460
00:17:26,137 --> 00:17:27,482
Well, then
the shoot's over.

461
00:17:27,482 --> 00:17:28,793
Whoa, whoa.
What's the problem?

462
00:17:28,793 --> 00:17:30,068
Uh, and who are you?

463
00:17:30,068 --> 00:17:32,793
I'm the manager/mother.Stop it.

464
00:17:32,793 --> 00:17:35,103
You're curls make
your daughter's curls

465
00:17:35,103 --> 00:17:36,551
look like trash.

466
00:17:36,551 --> 00:17:40,068
The rare triple helix --
the Holy Grail of curls.

467
00:17:40,068 --> 00:17:41,586
You must sleep
sitting up.

468
00:17:41,586 --> 00:17:43,758
Of course I do,
I'm not an animal.

469
00:17:43,758 --> 00:17:46,206
This is really last minute,
but we're totally in a bind.

470
00:17:46,206 --> 00:17:48,931
You could save the day.

471
00:17:49,931 --> 00:17:52,034
♪ You better work♪

472
00:17:52,034 --> 00:17:55,103
Whoo!
You own everything.

473
00:17:55,103 --> 00:17:58,655
Louis Vuitton,
CHANEL.

474
00:17:58,655 --> 00:18:03,103
All right...
Yaas! Slay Curl Kween!

475
00:18:03,103 --> 00:18:05,517
[ Voice breaking ]
For the family honor.

476
00:18:05,517 --> 00:18:07,206
[ Abbi sighs ]

477
00:18:07,206 --> 00:18:09,517
"The cast is electric"?

478
00:18:09,517 --> 00:18:13,310
What an idiot.

479
00:18:13,310 --> 00:18:14,448
[ Sighs ]

480
00:18:19,172 --> 00:18:20,344
Huh.

481
00:18:20,344 --> 00:18:22,448
[ Horn honks in distance ]

482
00:18:25,620 --> 00:18:27,517
♪ Doo, doo, doo ♪

483
00:18:27,517 --> 00:18:29,344
♪ Daa ♪Wow.

484
00:18:29,344 --> 00:18:31,068
♪ Daa daa ♪♪ Doo ♪

485
00:18:31,068 --> 00:18:34,206
♪ Daa daa daa ♪♪ Doo, doo ♪

486
00:18:34,206 --> 00:18:37,000
♪ Daa daa ♪♪ Doo, doo, doo ♪

487
00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:41,103
♪ Daa, daa-daa-daa-daa ♪♪ Doo, doo, doo, doo ♪

488
00:18:41,103 --> 00:18:42,551
♪ Daa ♪♪ Doo, doo ♪

489
00:18:42,551 --> 00:18:44,379
♪ Daa daa ♪♪ Doo ♪

490
00:18:44,379 --> 00:18:47,655
♪ Daa, daa-daa-daa-daa ♪♪ Doo, doo, doo ♪

491
00:18:47,655 --> 00:18:50,379
♪ Daa daa-daa ♪♪ Doo, doo ♪

492
00:18:50,379 --> 00:18:51,793
♪ Doo ♪

493
00:18:51,793 --> 00:18:54,379
♪ Doo, doo, doo ♪

494
00:18:54,379 --> 00:18:55,551
♪ Daa ♪♪ Doo, doo ♪

495
00:18:55,551 --> 00:19:00,103
♪ I would love to ♪

496
00:19:00,103 --> 00:19:02,137
♪ Scream ♪

497
00:19:05,758 --> 00:19:08,827
Okay, so this psycho dumped you
a second time in one day

498
00:19:08,827 --> 00:19:11,344
while you're hanging
between two buildings,

499
00:19:11,344 --> 00:19:13,482
two stories
above concrete?

500
00:19:13,482 --> 00:19:15,482
This bitch is a menace.
Right?

501
00:19:15,482 --> 00:19:16,862
But then there
was, like,

502
00:19:16,862 --> 00:19:18,620
this fire woman
that was rescuing me.

503
00:19:18,620 --> 00:19:21,275
She was, like, carrying me down,
and I was, like...

504
00:19:23,793 --> 00:19:25,655
"Who are you?"
Like, she was hot.

505
00:19:25,655 --> 00:19:28,137
Yas.
It's cool that
I can see that now.

506
00:19:28,137 --> 00:19:32,137
I mean, the female form --
God's hottest creation.

507
00:19:32,137 --> 00:19:33,931
Oh, yeah --
"Made in Her image."

508
00:19:33,931 --> 00:19:36,793
Hmm?
It's a Catholic thing.

509
00:19:36,793 --> 00:19:39,344
Man, I'm just so bummed
my modeling career

510
00:19:39,344 --> 00:19:40,689
is over before
it started.

511
00:19:40,689 --> 00:19:43,931
But my mom was
incredible.

512
00:19:43,931 --> 00:19:45,413
Wow.
She slayed.

513
00:19:45,413 --> 00:19:46,793
I got to show you.
Oh, my God.

514
00:19:46,793 --> 00:19:48,344
She posted all
about it.

515
00:19:48,344 --> 00:19:49,724
Who's that? Huh?

516
00:19:49,724 --> 00:19:51,241
Aww. Eliot.

517
00:19:51,241 --> 00:19:52,793
[ Inhales sharply,
exhales ]

518
00:19:52,793 --> 00:19:55,931
God, everybody's
moving away, huh?

519
00:19:55,931 --> 00:19:58,517
But not the most
important one.

520
00:19:58,517 --> 00:20:00,517
[ Smooches ]
The most important person...

521
00:20:00,517 --> 00:20:02,172
[Smooches]
...of my life.

522
00:20:02,172 --> 00:20:04,137
[ Smooches ]
I'd give everybody else up.

523
00:20:04,137 --> 00:20:05,448
[ Smooches,
smacks lips ]

524
00:20:05,448 --> 00:20:07,103
[ Horn honks in distance ]Yeah.

525
00:20:07,103 --> 00:20:09,034
Show me -- Why don't you
show me pictures of your mom,

526
00:20:09,034 --> 00:20:10,413
'cause I didn't see it.Yeah, I didn't even
give it to ya.

527
00:20:10,413 --> 00:20:11,586
Here.

528
00:20:11,586 --> 00:20:13,586
Holy shit.

529
00:20:13,586 --> 00:20:14,620
Wow.

530
00:20:14,620 --> 00:20:16,172
I'm like, "Go, girl!

531
00:20:16,172 --> 00:20:18,586
Slay, girl.
Work it, girl.

532
00:20:18,586 --> 00:20:20,724
Covergirl!
Slay, Mama!"

533
00:20:20,724 --> 00:20:21,965
Covergirl!Covergirl!

534
00:20:21,965 --> 00:20:23,758
Be the curl.Both: Covergirl!

535
00:20:23,758 --> 00:20:24,689
Covergirl!

536
00:20:24,689 --> 00:20:25,827
Covergirl.Covergirl.

537
00:20:25,827 --> 00:20:26,793
Covergirl!

538
00:20:26,793 --> 00:20:27,655
Covergirl!Covergirl!

539
00:20:27,655 --> 00:20:28,724
Devachan.

540
00:20:28,724 --> 00:20:29,827
Covergirl!Covergirl!

541
00:20:29,827 --> 00:20:31,448
Covergirl!
Ow! Dude!

542
00:20:31,448 --> 00:20:33,068
Ooh. Sorry.
I'm sorry. Sorry.
Ow!

543
00:20:33,068 --> 00:20:33,965
[ Groans ]

544
00:20:41,689 --> 00:20:43,137
♪ Cover girl ♪[ Camera shutter clicking ]

545
00:20:43,137 --> 00:20:44,379
♪ Work it, girl ♪♪ Give a twirl ♪

546
00:20:44,379 --> 00:20:47,310
♪ Do your thing on the runway ♪

547
00:20:47,310 --> 00:20:49,000
♪ Work ♪♪ Supermodel ♪

548
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:51,172
♪ You better work it, girl ♪♪ Of the world ♪

549
00:20:51,172 --> 00:20:54,551
♪ Wet your lips and make love
to the camera ♪