1 00:00:17,852 --> 00:00:21,355 I know it's the middle of the night. I really just need five minutes of your time. 2 00:00:29,864 --> 00:00:31,574 Richard: Holy shit. What happened? 3 00:00:31,657 --> 00:00:35,036 Gavin: I was working through some issues. Mind the glass. 4 00:00:40,249 --> 00:00:41,667 What the fuck is this? 5 00:00:42,418 --> 00:00:46,547 It's a license for your peer-to-peer computer communication patent. 6 00:00:46,631 --> 00:00:48,716 It's very standard stuff. 7 00:00:48,799 --> 00:00:50,569 Uh, essentially, in exchange for your patent, 8 00:00:50,593 --> 00:00:55,723 you would get a royalty and equity in the new company that I'm starting up. 9 00:00:55,806 --> 00:00:59,227 So, if you just sign there, by the post-it note, 10 00:00:59,310 --> 00:01:02,313 and I will take it, and leave, and you will never see me again. 11 00:01:03,648 --> 00:01:04,815 Are you joking? 12 00:01:06,150 --> 00:01:07,735 Uh, well, I guess we could hang out. 13 00:01:07,818 --> 00:01:09,320 Richard, stop talking. 14 00:01:09,820 --> 00:01:13,532 I was just ousted from my own company, a company I built from the ground up. 15 00:01:13,699 --> 00:01:15,952 My legacy is in ashes. 16 00:01:16,994 --> 00:01:18,329 Come on. I wouldn't say that. 17 00:01:18,621 --> 00:01:20,623 - Well, the wall street journal said that. - Oh. 18 00:01:20,706 --> 00:01:22,750 I lost everything because of something you did, 19 00:01:22,833 --> 00:01:25,920 and you're here at 3:00 am. Asking me for a favor? 20 00:01:26,003 --> 00:01:28,965 Really? You're a mean person, Richard. You know that? 21 00:01:29,048 --> 00:01:30,716 You're a bad guy. 22 00:01:30,841 --> 00:01:32,635 No, no, no, no. Iwouldn't say that. 23 00:01:32,718 --> 00:01:34,804 I think maybe what's happening is that 24 00:01:34,887 --> 00:01:37,648 you're just not understanding the technology I'm trying to build here. 25 00:01:37,682 --> 00:01:39,350 Oh, so, now I'm stupid, too? 26 00:01:39,558 --> 00:01:42,770 I know what the technology is, Richard. I have a patent on it. 27 00:01:42,853 --> 00:01:44,855 What the fuck is the matter with you? 28 00:01:46,691 --> 00:01:47,942 So, you're not gonna sign it? 29 00:01:48,025 --> 00:01:49,652 No, I'm not gonna sign this! 30 00:01:49,735 --> 00:01:51,779 Jesus, you're a fucking sadist, you know that? 31 00:01:51,862 --> 00:01:53,030 You're demented. 32 00:01:53,114 --> 00:01:56,551 I'm almost tempted to let you have a run at it, just to watch you waste your fucking time. 33 00:01:56,575 --> 00:01:59,370 This technology did not work when Peter theorized it, 34 00:01:59,453 --> 00:02:00,830 and it doesn't work now. 35 00:02:05,042 --> 00:02:07,962 It... it actually does work now. 36 00:02:08,379 --> 00:02:09,714 - It does. - Oh, really? 37 00:02:10,047 --> 00:02:11,757 When did the laws of physics change? 38 00:02:12,133 --> 00:02:15,469 When I exceeded the theoretical limit of compression at techcrunch. 39 00:02:15,594 --> 00:02:17,072 - You were there. - I know I was there, 40 00:02:17,096 --> 00:02:19,890 thank you for bringing up that very painful memory. 41 00:02:24,478 --> 00:02:25,980 Okay. 42 00:02:26,230 --> 00:02:28,149 Can I... can I just... 43 00:02:28,232 --> 00:02:29,775 - What? - Draw on this? 44 00:02:30,318 --> 00:02:33,321 Sure. Why not? It's shattered, just like I am. 45 00:02:33,571 --> 00:02:36,157 I read Peter's notes, all of them. 46 00:02:36,240 --> 00:02:40,703 And, uh, he knew that a peer-to-peer Internet was possible, in the future. 47 00:02:41,245 --> 00:02:45,458 But he was also basing that on what, old desktop computers? 48 00:02:45,750 --> 00:02:52,089 He never, ever, foresaw the ubiquity or power of all of our modern-day smartphones. 49 00:02:52,298 --> 00:02:55,009 He was also dealing with a completely different weissman limit. 50 00:02:55,843 --> 00:02:58,554 So, uh, yeah. Yeah, okay. 51 00:02:58,679 --> 00:02:59,805 What is that? 52 00:02:59,889 --> 00:03:01,390 Is that number correct? 53 00:03:01,515 --> 00:03:03,601 The delta in mean device efficiency? 54 00:03:03,768 --> 00:03:05,102 Yeah, it is. 55 00:03:05,478 --> 00:03:07,396 See, eventually, over time, 56 00:03:07,480 --> 00:03:12,693 this will render every server that hooli operates obsolete. 57 00:03:12,860 --> 00:03:14,570 Which would make Jack barker shit himself. 58 00:03:14,695 --> 00:03:17,114 - Holy shit. - You know what, actually, I'm gonna... 59 00:03:21,911 --> 00:03:23,329 Welcome to the future, Gavin. 60 00:03:24,622 --> 00:03:26,415 Whoa! Oh, no! Oh, no! 61 00:03:26,499 --> 00:03:28,167 - Son of a bitch! - I'm sorry. 62 00:03:40,346 --> 00:03:42,890 Monica: Wow, dinesh. This front end design looks great. 63 00:03:43,015 --> 00:03:44,642 - Thank you. - Nice work. 64 00:03:44,975 --> 00:03:46,143 What's in that? 65 00:03:46,644 --> 00:03:48,938 Uh, that is a burrito for the test. 66 00:03:49,939 --> 00:03:51,315 - Good to know. - Oh. 67 00:03:51,649 --> 00:03:52,650 Let him have it. 68 00:03:52,733 --> 00:03:55,111 Gilfoyle thought he was too good to work on seefood, 69 00:03:55,194 --> 00:03:56,821 and now he's about to lose a fortune. 70 00:03:56,904 --> 00:03:57,947 -Okay. 71 00:03:58,030 --> 00:03:59,115 Ready for test. 72 00:03:59,198 --> 00:04:00,574 After you, milady. 73 00:04:01,617 --> 00:04:04,161 Oh, this is weird. Miajust texted me, "good luck with the demo." 74 00:04:04,245 --> 00:04:05,845 Did any of you guys tell her about this? 75 00:04:05,996 --> 00:04:08,165 Your hacker girlfriend wouldn't happen to know 76 00:04:08,249 --> 00:04:10,167 the model of our router, would she? 77 00:04:10,292 --> 00:04:13,629 Yeah, actually. She complimented your choice. 78 00:04:14,839 --> 00:04:15,959 Why didn't you say anything? 79 00:04:16,006 --> 00:04:18,166 Why would I tell you she said something nice about you? 80 00:04:18,384 --> 00:04:19,552 Dammit! 81 00:04:19,677 --> 00:04:21,178 We have to assume she's everywhere. 82 00:04:23,973 --> 00:04:25,724 Okay. It's ready. 83 00:04:26,851 --> 00:04:28,185 Please, god. 84 00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:32,356 What would you say if I told you there's an app on the market... 85 00:04:32,440 --> 00:04:34,859 We're past that part! Just demo it. 86 00:04:35,317 --> 00:04:37,945 Okay. Let's start with a hot dog. 87 00:04:47,746 --> 00:04:48,956 Holy shit! 88 00:04:49,039 --> 00:04:50,416 - Yes! - Monica: It works! 89 00:04:50,499 --> 00:04:51,959 - Erlich: Motherfuck! - Huzzah! 90 00:04:52,376 --> 00:04:55,254 Jian-Yang, my beautiful little asiatic friend, 91 00:04:55,337 --> 00:04:58,007 I'm going to buy you the palapa of your life. 92 00:04:58,090 --> 00:05:00,885 We will have 12 posts, braided palm leaves. 93 00:05:01,343 --> 00:05:02,761 You'll never feel exposed again. 94 00:05:02,887 --> 00:05:04,305 I'm gonna be rich. 95 00:05:04,388 --> 00:05:05,639 Fuck you, gilfoyle. 96 00:05:05,723 --> 00:05:06,807 - Do pizza! - Yes, do pizza. 97 00:05:06,891 --> 00:05:08,058 - Yeah. - Do pizza. 98 00:05:08,684 --> 00:05:10,019 Pizza. 99 00:05:15,649 --> 00:05:17,067 Monica: "Not hot dog"? 100 00:05:17,443 --> 00:05:19,236 - Wait, what the fuck? - Huh? 101 00:05:19,737 --> 00:05:22,281 That's it? It only does hot dogs? 102 00:05:22,573 --> 00:05:24,408 No. And not hot dog. 103 00:05:24,742 --> 00:05:27,578 Gimme that. Give it to me. 104 00:05:32,208 --> 00:05:33,501 Jian-Yang. 105 00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:34,919 Motherfuck. 106 00:05:35,044 --> 00:05:39,256 I gave you the ability to spin gold, and instead you spun pubic hair, 107 00:05:39,340 --> 00:05:41,383 with shit in it and gravel and corn. 108 00:05:41,467 --> 00:05:42,510 Hold on, hold on. 109 00:05:42,593 --> 00:05:45,304 Jian-Yang's actually put together a pretty good classifier. 110 00:05:45,554 --> 00:05:49,558 You know, I mean, the core tech is valid. It just needs to be trained. 111 00:05:49,725 --> 00:05:51,727 So, what he did for hot dogs, 112 00:05:51,810 --> 00:05:54,855 he needs to repeat for every food in existence? 113 00:05:54,939 --> 00:05:57,399 No. That's very boring work. 114 00:05:57,650 --> 00:06:00,903 That's scraping the Internet for thousands of food pictures. 115 00:06:01,278 --> 00:06:02,613 You can hire someone else. 116 00:06:02,738 --> 00:06:06,450 We can't, because we just spent a big, fat stack of cash 117 00:06:06,534 --> 00:06:07,868 on little dinesh over here. 118 00:06:07,952 --> 00:06:09,203 And there are other expenses. 119 00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:14,208 Legal, marketing, operating fees, those goddamned aws charges. 120 00:06:14,291 --> 00:06:16,544 Fucking bezos. 121 00:06:17,878 --> 00:06:19,380 And so, we do not have the funds 122 00:06:19,463 --> 00:06:22,132 to hire scut workers to do your scraping for you. 123 00:06:22,258 --> 00:06:24,802 And thus, you will scrape the Internet. 124 00:06:24,927 --> 00:06:26,262 You and you alone. 125 00:06:26,345 --> 00:06:29,348 I'm sorry, the time to back out was before you signed the term sheet. 126 00:06:29,473 --> 00:06:32,685 I'm gonna tell Laurie that this was a smashing success. 127 00:06:33,102 --> 00:06:34,144 Go make it one. 128 00:06:34,228 --> 00:06:35,479 Erlich was right. 129 00:06:35,604 --> 00:06:37,439 You're a white witch. 130 00:06:53,539 --> 00:06:55,541 Good. Yes, you are all here. 131 00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:59,128 Um, I think it's probably time we all had a chat. 132 00:07:01,297 --> 00:07:02,339 About what? 133 00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:05,467 Well, I'm pretty sure you're all wondering where I've been. 134 00:07:05,551 --> 00:07:08,429 - You were gone? - Yes. I was gone all week. 135 00:07:08,637 --> 00:07:10,472 I saw you come out of the shower yesterday. 136 00:07:10,639 --> 00:07:11,682 Okay. 137 00:07:11,890 --> 00:07:14,018 Uh, well, obviously, I've been sleeping here at night. 138 00:07:14,143 --> 00:07:15,495 But I've been gone during the day. 139 00:07:15,519 --> 00:07:17,396 Pretty sure that shower was in the morning. 140 00:07:17,521 --> 00:07:19,499 - That's part of the day, Richard. - Okay, gilfoyle. 141 00:07:19,523 --> 00:07:22,568 I've been sleeping here at night, and then I've been here for some mornings, 142 00:07:22,651 --> 00:07:25,029 but I've left the house during the day. 143 00:07:25,112 --> 00:07:26,840 We all leave the house during the day, Richard. 144 00:07:26,864 --> 00:07:28,073 That's not weird. 145 00:07:28,532 --> 00:07:30,034 I went to get coffee this morning. 146 00:07:30,367 --> 00:07:31,910 Yeah, I went to the dispensary. 147 00:07:32,202 --> 00:07:34,455 And then I'd smoked the weed before I got home, 148 00:07:34,538 --> 00:07:36,081 so I went back to the dispensary. 149 00:07:36,165 --> 00:07:37,207 You know what? 150 00:07:37,666 --> 00:07:40,252 I just realized I haven't left the house in six days. 151 00:07:41,128 --> 00:07:42,588 Now that's worth exploring. 152 00:07:42,755 --> 00:07:45,966 Okay, I get it. Look, every day this week, I have been 153 00:07:47,176 --> 00:07:49,386 - at Gavin belson's house. - What? 154 00:07:49,511 --> 00:07:51,722 Gavin has offered to go into business together. 155 00:07:53,057 --> 00:07:55,267 But, look, I just came there for the patent. 156 00:07:55,351 --> 00:07:57,353 And he was the one who wanted to be full partners. 157 00:07:58,062 --> 00:07:59,229 What did you say? 158 00:08:00,189 --> 00:08:03,359 We talked about it, and we agreed that it would be the best thing to do. 159 00:08:03,651 --> 00:08:06,403 Oh, good lord. Richard. No. 160 00:08:06,570 --> 00:08:07,770 Guys, look. I have the patent. 161 00:08:08,238 --> 00:08:09,323 I also have funding. 162 00:08:09,406 --> 00:08:11,700 And real, genuine insight into the whole thing. 163 00:08:11,784 --> 00:08:15,245 Let's not forget here that Gavin is a co-founder 164 00:08:15,329 --> 00:08:17,665 of a bajillion-dollar tech company. 165 00:08:17,790 --> 00:08:19,166 Are you out of your fucking mind? 166 00:08:19,249 --> 00:08:23,379 When you Don the skin of the beast, the man within dies. 167 00:08:23,504 --> 00:08:24,838 What is that, Nietzsche? 168 00:08:24,922 --> 00:08:26,924 One of the boys at my group home always said that. 169 00:08:27,091 --> 00:08:28,092 He died. 170 00:08:28,175 --> 00:08:29,885 You're not pulling dinesh off seefood. 171 00:08:29,968 --> 00:08:33,430 And I am not leaving seefood to go work for Gavin fucking belson. 172 00:08:33,555 --> 00:08:34,765 I'm not asking you to. 173 00:08:35,557 --> 00:08:36,600 You're not? 174 00:08:36,850 --> 00:08:38,578 Guys, do you not remember the last time we talked 175 00:08:38,602 --> 00:08:41,021 about us all working with Gavin belson? 176 00:08:41,230 --> 00:08:44,441 Gilfoyle, you told me to chortle your balls. 177 00:08:44,525 --> 00:08:46,652 And everybody else walked out of the room. 178 00:08:46,777 --> 00:08:48,487 I know how much you hate him, 179 00:08:49,446 --> 00:08:52,741 which is exactly why I told Gavin if we were gonna do this thing, 180 00:08:52,825 --> 00:08:54,302 that you guys wouldn't be coming with. 181 00:08:54,326 --> 00:08:59,081 So, we have hired a recruiter to find people to replace you guys. 182 00:08:59,456 --> 00:09:00,541 Even me? 183 00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:03,711 Well, no. You don't really need to be replaced. 184 00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:05,713 It's true. I can't be replaced. 185 00:09:07,756 --> 00:09:13,053 Well, when you left video chat, you did keep the rights to the algorithm. So... 186 00:09:13,137 --> 00:09:16,432 I mean, it's weird, but I guess it's really none of our business. 187 00:09:16,598 --> 00:09:18,142 It's my fucking business. 188 00:09:18,308 --> 00:09:21,061 - I now own 10%... - 5%, actually. 189 00:09:21,437 --> 00:09:24,523 - What? - 10% of my half of the company is 5%. 190 00:09:25,149 --> 00:09:28,589 But I mean, look, your shares are gonna be worth a whole lot more than they ever would, 191 00:09:28,652 --> 00:09:31,739 now with the patent and Gavin being involved, so... 192 00:09:32,990 --> 00:09:34,950 So, then we're all good here, I guess. Right? 193 00:09:35,117 --> 00:09:36,452 I think that's right. 194 00:09:37,536 --> 00:09:38,829 Weird. 195 00:09:39,037 --> 00:09:40,998 All right. Well, thanks for understanding. 196 00:09:41,665 --> 00:09:43,000 You're welcome. 197 00:09:53,844 --> 00:09:55,846 I don't think we need to be afraid of the Wi-Fi. 198 00:09:55,929 --> 00:09:59,224 It's pronounced "wifey," and clearly you don't understand 199 00:09:59,308 --> 00:10:02,019 the threat level of the person that you're sexually disappointing. 200 00:10:02,144 --> 00:10:03,437 We're going hard wire. 201 00:10:03,854 --> 00:10:04,938 What about my phone? 202 00:10:05,022 --> 00:10:06,782 You mean the thing that tracks your movement, 203 00:10:06,857 --> 00:10:08,609 and every interaction you have? 204 00:10:08,692 --> 00:10:10,152 Literally, your fingerprint? 205 00:10:10,235 --> 00:10:13,572 The second you're on Wi-Fi it's like you're leaving her alone with your phone. 206 00:10:15,699 --> 00:10:19,495 80, actually leaving her alone with my phone, 207 00:10:20,537 --> 00:10:21,955 that would be bad? 208 00:10:22,539 --> 00:10:23,874 You fucking idiot. 209 00:10:23,999 --> 00:10:25,250 I was in the bathroom. 210 00:10:25,459 --> 00:10:26,585 For how long? 211 00:10:27,461 --> 00:10:28,754 Awhile. 212 00:10:32,758 --> 00:10:34,009 Who's that? 213 00:10:34,718 --> 00:10:36,428 Oh, Richard's meeting with Brett saxby. 214 00:10:37,054 --> 00:10:38,138 Gilfoyle: From hooli? 215 00:10:38,347 --> 00:10:40,265 Formerly. The recruiter sent him over. 216 00:10:40,390 --> 00:10:42,559 He's interviewing him for head of engineering. 217 00:10:44,895 --> 00:10:46,897 Why? That guy sucks. 218 00:10:48,899 --> 00:10:50,734 Why is Richard in there with Brett saxby? 219 00:10:51,401 --> 00:10:52,903 He was in Gavin's inner circle. 220 00:10:53,362 --> 00:10:54,655 Is Richard aware of that? 221 00:10:54,947 --> 00:10:57,699 Is anyone taking notes? Does Richard even have a pen? 222 00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:05,499 That's so funny. 223 00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,460 It's 10:00 am. 224 00:11:08,877 --> 00:11:10,254 Why are they drinking beer? 225 00:11:10,671 --> 00:11:12,214 Because he sucks. 226 00:11:12,923 --> 00:11:14,567 Did dick say who else he was meeting with? 227 00:11:14,591 --> 00:11:17,302 The recruiter sent him like a whole big list right there. 228 00:11:20,264 --> 00:11:21,431 Gonna be late for class. 229 00:11:21,557 --> 00:11:22,641 How's that going? 230 00:11:22,724 --> 00:11:23,851 Uh, it's okay. 231 00:11:23,934 --> 00:11:26,353 I'm just a little nervous I might run out of material soon. 232 00:11:26,687 --> 00:11:30,816 We already watched the Facebook movie, a./., the net, and half of tron. 233 00:11:31,024 --> 00:11:32,150 Which tron? 234 00:11:32,442 --> 00:11:33,819 What? No, tron. 235 00:11:33,944 --> 00:11:35,362 There's two trons. 236 00:11:35,445 --> 00:11:37,281 Oh, shit. That's awesome. 237 00:11:37,364 --> 00:11:38,764 Should get me through another week. 238 00:11:38,907 --> 00:11:39,950 Thanks! 239 00:11:41,118 --> 00:11:43,495 This entire list is a shitshow of shitheads. 240 00:11:43,954 --> 00:11:46,540 Why would Richard trust a recruiter to source him recruits? 241 00:11:46,623 --> 00:11:48,542 - It doesn't make sense. - Huh. 242 00:11:48,792 --> 00:11:50,878 - What? - You guys seem like super-invested 243 00:11:50,961 --> 00:11:54,298 in who Richard hires to work with Gavin belson, that's all. 244 00:11:54,381 --> 00:11:55,799 Are you insinuating jealousy? 245 00:11:56,341 --> 00:11:58,886 - This is just concern for Richard's vision. - Mmm-hmm. 246 00:11:58,969 --> 00:12:03,849 If Richard wants to saddle himself with mediocrity, go for it. 247 00:12:04,558 --> 00:12:05,642 You did not. 248 00:12:06,059 --> 00:12:08,562 Brett: I swear to god, bro. I swear to god. 249 00:12:08,645 --> 00:12:12,357 Well, I tell you what. Next time you bust out the old sea-doo, give me a call. 250 00:12:13,150 --> 00:12:14,568 Uh, guys, you know Brett? 251 00:12:15,193 --> 00:12:16,236 Nope. 252 00:12:16,320 --> 00:12:17,440 It's great to meet you guys. 253 00:12:17,487 --> 00:12:18,530 We've met. 254 00:12:18,655 --> 00:12:21,074 Uh, okay. Well, it has been a pleasure. 255 00:12:21,575 --> 00:12:23,827 I shall walk you to your car. 256 00:12:24,369 --> 00:12:26,204 All right, after me. 257 00:12:26,288 --> 00:12:27,539 - Yeah. - Okay. 258 00:12:32,377 --> 00:12:33,503 I hate him. 259 00:12:33,587 --> 00:12:36,632 Gentlemen, I just paid the palapa contractor. 260 00:12:36,715 --> 00:12:38,383 The palapa Piper, so to speak. 261 00:12:38,592 --> 00:12:39,843 The dream is a reality. 262 00:12:40,052 --> 00:12:43,221 We will no longer be exposed to the elements. 263 00:12:43,472 --> 00:12:44,681 Hey, erlich. 264 00:12:45,182 --> 00:12:47,184 You wanna guess who's on this list of availables 265 00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:48,977 that Richard just got from his recruiter? 266 00:12:49,061 --> 00:12:50,062 Who? 267 00:12:50,145 --> 00:12:51,480 Your boy jian-Yang. 268 00:12:52,689 --> 00:12:53,815 - What? - What? 269 00:12:55,192 --> 00:12:56,777 Jian-Yang! 270 00:12:56,860 --> 00:13:00,238 You already have a fucking job, jian-Yang. You have to finish seefood. 271 00:13:00,405 --> 00:13:01,782 Now get to food scraping. 272 00:13:02,491 --> 00:13:03,659 I fucking hate seefood. 273 00:13:03,742 --> 00:13:05,535 I have to look at different hot dogs. 274 00:13:05,869 --> 00:13:09,247 There's Chinese hot dogs, Polish hot dogs, Jewish hot dogs. 275 00:13:09,331 --> 00:13:10,540 It's fucking stupid. 276 00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:12,960 Well, here, here's one more for ya. 277 00:13:16,380 --> 00:13:18,882 See? Hotdog. Doesn't even fucking work right. 278 00:13:19,967 --> 00:13:22,094 You should hire someone using company money, 279 00:13:22,177 --> 00:13:24,096 not build a roof over nothing. 280 00:13:25,097 --> 00:13:27,182 The palapa was budgeted for, jian-Yang. 281 00:13:27,265 --> 00:13:28,618 That's what you do when you get funding, 282 00:13:28,642 --> 00:13:31,395 you upscale your workspace to help with recruiting. 283 00:13:31,561 --> 00:13:33,063 You just said you recruit no one. 284 00:13:33,313 --> 00:13:34,874 Because we spent all the money on upscaling. 285 00:13:34,898 --> 00:13:36,692 Why is this so confusing? 286 00:13:36,775 --> 00:13:37,901 You stealing. 287 00:13:38,402 --> 00:13:40,570 If you can steal, I can quit. 288 00:13:40,696 --> 00:13:46,159 I have meetings at periscope, airbnb, good companies. 289 00:13:46,243 --> 00:13:48,328 The fuck you do. 290 00:13:48,829 --> 00:13:52,332 We still have $150,000 of raviga's money left. 291 00:13:52,457 --> 00:13:53,667 That's three months of burn. 292 00:13:53,750 --> 00:13:57,087 So, 'til we are dick up and flat broke, this is your life. 293 00:13:57,254 --> 00:13:58,422 Get to it. 294 00:14:02,592 --> 00:14:04,094 This is no life. 295 00:14:04,428 --> 00:14:05,721 I want to live. 296 00:14:06,096 --> 00:14:07,305 Erase that dick picture. 297 00:14:09,850 --> 00:14:11,560 Tom han ks: You've got mail. 298 00:14:12,102 --> 00:14:13,270 Meg Ryan: Yes. 299 00:14:16,273 --> 00:14:18,233 Tom Hanks: Those are very powerful words. 300 00:14:18,442 --> 00:14:20,152 - Sorry. - No, it's okay. 301 00:14:20,694 --> 00:14:22,863 Your phone has technology inside it. 302 00:14:23,363 --> 00:14:24,573 So, you're double learning. 303 00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:30,704 Jian-Yang, what in the good fuck is that? 304 00:14:30,787 --> 00:14:33,832 It's called business expense. 305 00:14:35,834 --> 00:14:37,461 You buy a hut. 306 00:14:38,086 --> 00:14:40,338 I buy a car. 307 00:14:40,756 --> 00:14:43,800 You say keep doing seefood until money is gone. 308 00:14:44,009 --> 00:14:46,845 Now, the money is gone. 309 00:14:48,055 --> 00:14:49,222 Dick 310 00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:51,016 is up. 311 00:14:52,267 --> 00:14:54,667 Where'd you get those sunglasses, did they come with the car? 312 00:14:56,480 --> 00:14:57,814 These are from your mom. 313 00:14:57,981 --> 00:14:58,981 Listen, jian-Yang. 314 00:14:59,024 --> 00:15:01,264 You can't just blow the rest of our runway on a corvette. 315 00:15:01,318 --> 00:15:02,837 Who's gonna scrape the Internet? 316 00:15:02,861 --> 00:15:06,406 Twelve-speaker sound system. It's very loud. Very expensive. 317 00:15:17,125 --> 00:15:18,335 What the fuck was that? 318 00:15:19,127 --> 00:15:23,507 Oh, just three months of runway being driven off by 90 pounds of asshole. 319 00:15:24,007 --> 00:15:27,719 Spoken by a 280-pound pile of shit. 320 00:15:28,845 --> 00:15:30,305 The fuck are you gonna do now? 321 00:15:32,057 --> 00:15:34,351 Professor bighetti, a word if you please? 322 00:15:35,811 --> 00:15:37,187 Richard. 323 00:15:38,021 --> 00:15:39,564 I know it's none of my business, 324 00:15:40,524 --> 00:15:43,193 but I worked with that Brett saxby fellow at hooli. 325 00:15:43,318 --> 00:15:44,945 He's a talented engineer, 326 00:15:45,028 --> 00:15:48,865 but in an office environment, he can be both tardy and fresh. 327 00:15:49,533 --> 00:15:51,076 Uh, I'm not hiring him. 328 00:15:51,159 --> 00:15:52,577 He uses spaces, not tabs. 329 00:15:52,869 --> 00:15:54,121 I see. Okay. 330 00:15:55,122 --> 00:15:56,665 Well, that's a relief. 331 00:15:56,790 --> 00:15:59,501 But, Richard, what about the next Brett saxby? 332 00:16:00,418 --> 00:16:02,087 Or the Brett saxby after that? 333 00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:06,508 And even if you vet them all, you are still in a room with Gavin. 334 00:16:06,633 --> 00:16:08,677 80? We're partners. What's your point? 335 00:16:08,760 --> 00:16:14,224 He and his posse of bandits and cutthroats will turn on you in a second. 336 00:16:14,391 --> 00:16:15,559 You need me. 337 00:16:16,059 --> 00:16:19,938 The half-crazed, half-apache who will do anything to get your back. 338 00:16:20,063 --> 00:16:21,398 I'll scalp Gavin if I have to, 339 00:16:21,481 --> 00:16:23,417 and all the rest of those pale-faced sons of bitches. 340 00:16:23,441 --> 00:16:25,652 I'll kill them with knives. I'll kill them with guns. 341 00:16:25,735 --> 00:16:28,238 I'll kill them with my hands. I'll talk them into suicide. 342 00:16:28,321 --> 00:16:29,364 It doesn't matter. 343 00:16:29,447 --> 00:16:33,577 All right, Jared. I think what you're asking is... 344 00:16:33,660 --> 00:16:34,744 You want a job? 345 00:16:34,995 --> 00:16:36,913 If you think you can find a place for me. 346 00:16:36,997 --> 00:16:38,874 Yeah. Of course, Jared. 347 00:16:39,166 --> 00:16:41,084 You're more than welcome to work on this. 348 00:16:42,961 --> 00:16:46,089 Butjust to be clear, you're not gonna stab anyone, are you? 349 00:16:49,092 --> 00:16:50,594 Oh, it feels good to laugh. 350 00:16:52,637 --> 00:16:54,431 So, that's a no, then? 351 00:16:56,933 --> 00:16:58,602 Richard. 352 00:17:00,604 --> 00:17:03,106 So, we're not gonna finish the movie? 353 00:17:03,315 --> 00:17:04,524 Yeah, sorry. 354 00:17:04,608 --> 00:17:07,360 But my colleague here was pretty adamant 355 00:17:07,444 --> 00:17:12,407 that a better use of class time might be to learn while accomplishing something. 356 00:17:12,616 --> 00:17:14,216 Now, take one, pass it all the way down. 357 00:17:14,284 --> 00:17:16,995 We're supposed to scrape the Internet for thousands of food images? 358 00:17:17,204 --> 00:17:22,125 Yeah. So, you'll find like five, or 30,000 pictures of your food. 359 00:17:22,292 --> 00:17:26,379 And then put them in a folder with that food's name on it. 360 00:17:26,463 --> 00:17:31,051 And it's good if you get like, weird angles or lighting of your food. 361 00:17:31,134 --> 00:17:32,254 So, it should be pretty fun. 362 00:17:32,302 --> 00:17:36,765 So, we're gathering training data to run through a convolutional neural net. 363 00:17:37,224 --> 00:17:38,475 Like an image classifier? 364 00:17:38,725 --> 00:17:39,893 Who wants broccoli? 365 00:17:40,101 --> 00:17:41,978 Broccolini, for the ladies? Broccoli. 366 00:17:42,312 --> 00:17:45,815 Just so you know, this does not mean I don't trust her. 367 00:17:45,982 --> 00:17:49,486 I'm just doing this so you'll, like, shut up and leave me alone. 368 00:17:50,237 --> 00:17:53,281 Mia, if you're listening, you're so pretty. 369 00:17:54,616 --> 00:17:56,159 Oh, you're both headed to Gavin's? 370 00:17:56,243 --> 00:17:57,452 Indeed we are. 371 00:17:57,577 --> 00:17:58,703 Together again. 372 00:17:58,828 --> 00:18:01,331 Butch Cassidy and his head of business development. 373 00:18:01,498 --> 00:18:03,541 Richard: Oh, wow. Another western reference. 374 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:05,418 Yaw! 375 00:18:05,669 --> 00:18:07,254 Let's go. 376 00:18:09,422 --> 00:18:10,966 You know, he'd hire you, too. 377 00:18:11,258 --> 00:18:12,259 What? 378 00:18:12,342 --> 00:18:14,844 All you have to do is admit that you want the job. 379 00:18:15,887 --> 00:18:18,473 And like, get down on your knees and beg. 380 00:18:18,682 --> 00:18:22,686 Says the guy who's romancing a woman through a phone that isn't even on. 381 00:18:23,144 --> 00:18:27,357 A woman that he described to me in private as a skinny little fuck factory. 382 00:18:27,857 --> 00:18:30,360 Oh! No, I didn't! God. 383 00:18:32,028 --> 00:18:33,530 Mia, I would never do that. 384 00:18:35,365 --> 00:18:38,576 Richard, Brett saxby ran my data analytics team for three years. 385 00:18:38,660 --> 00:18:40,954 Respectfully, I think passing on him is a mistake. 386 00:18:41,204 --> 00:18:45,041 Yes. Well, I met with Brett saxby and, um... 387 00:18:46,710 --> 00:18:48,628 Uh... to be honest... 388 00:18:51,673 --> 00:18:53,550 To be honest, I don't think he's our man. 389 00:18:54,676 --> 00:18:57,262 Fair enough. There are plenty of good alternatives on this list. 390 00:18:57,721 --> 00:19:01,224 Although I'm a little confused by your notes on some of these people. 391 00:19:01,516 --> 00:19:02,684 "David Burnham. 392 00:19:02,892 --> 00:19:08,857 "Annoying slob, fucked-up face, I could write better python with my asshole." 393 00:19:08,982 --> 00:19:11,693 You know what, I think, you have my list. 394 00:19:11,985 --> 00:19:14,070 Yes. I have a very weird shorthand. 395 00:19:14,904 --> 00:19:15,947 Yeah. 396 00:19:17,741 --> 00:19:19,326 Okay. Next. 397 00:19:20,118 --> 00:19:23,246 Becca... no, guys. That goes in the sun room. 398 00:19:23,747 --> 00:19:25,999 I'll show you. All right. Back in a flash. 399 00:19:26,082 --> 00:19:27,917 Come this way, gentlemen. Here. 400 00:19:29,252 --> 00:19:31,713 God, there are pages of graphic insults here. 401 00:19:32,005 --> 00:19:33,298 Fucking gilfoyle. 402 00:19:33,590 --> 00:19:34,674 Right? 403 00:19:36,426 --> 00:19:39,888 Richard, would you be open to having gilfoyle on the team? 404 00:19:40,096 --> 00:19:41,181 Oh, yeah. Of course. 405 00:19:41,264 --> 00:19:43,725 I mean, I'd hire him in a second, but he'd never do it. 406 00:19:44,559 --> 00:19:47,562 Richard, gilfoyle is a man of intense pride. 407 00:19:47,729 --> 00:19:53,151 So, when he refers to a potential employee as a "pig-faced fuck nose," 408 00:19:53,651 --> 00:19:56,905 what I hear is, "I need to be needed." 409 00:19:57,280 --> 00:19:59,657 Well, what I hear is pig-faced fuck nose. 410 00:19:59,741 --> 00:20:00,741 Exactly. 411 00:20:00,784 --> 00:20:04,454 I mean, gilfoyle's insults are normally well-crafted, almost poetic. 412 00:20:04,954 --> 00:20:08,708 Last week, he referred to me as Frankenstein's bulimic daughter. 413 00:20:09,459 --> 00:20:11,795 Yeah. I get what you mean. 414 00:20:11,961 --> 00:20:14,297 So, what do you want me to do, Jared? Beg him? 415 00:20:14,798 --> 00:20:17,967 Well, I think a little outreach would be in the company's best interest. 416 00:20:19,969 --> 00:20:22,305 And really, "butt-dick"? 417 00:20:23,306 --> 00:20:24,641 The man's in pain. 418 00:20:27,060 --> 00:20:33,191 Hey, I know this system is super-confusing, but we don't see any completed assignments. 419 00:20:34,150 --> 00:20:36,277 Cut the shit. Where's the work? 420 00:20:36,361 --> 00:20:39,864 Well, we all got to talking the other day after class. 421 00:20:39,989 --> 00:20:42,742 We couldn't figure out if you were like a ta, 422 00:20:42,826 --> 00:20:44,911 or why you were giving us assignments, 423 00:20:44,994 --> 00:20:48,665 but we all agreed we didn't like the way that you were speaking to professor bighetti. 424 00:20:48,790 --> 00:20:49,916 I'm used to it. 425 00:20:50,500 --> 00:20:52,293 So, we searched your name on pitchbook, 426 00:20:52,377 --> 00:20:55,797 and that seefood app you got funded at raviga popped up. 427 00:20:55,964 --> 00:20:58,049 Pitchbook? How do you have access to pitchbook? 428 00:20:58,133 --> 00:21:00,093 Your idea was so simple, 429 00:21:00,176 --> 00:21:02,780 it was like something you could come up with in the room during a meeting. 430 00:21:02,804 --> 00:21:07,559 Which is what Garrett from Coleman Blair told us at the cs undergrad mixer on Friday. 431 00:21:07,767 --> 00:21:10,270 Hey, erlich. Here I am. 432 00:21:10,645 --> 00:21:11,855 Class of '06. 433 00:21:12,313 --> 00:21:13,440 Go cardinal. 434 00:21:13,857 --> 00:21:14,857 Go cardinal. 435 00:21:14,899 --> 00:21:17,318 Anyways, we founded our own shazam for food company, 436 00:21:17,402 --> 00:21:19,654 - and he's funding us. - Mmm-hmm. 437 00:21:19,863 --> 00:21:21,573 - Congrats! - Wait, that's stealing. 438 00:21:22,115 --> 00:21:24,409 No, it's exactly what Mark Zuckerberg did 439 00:21:24,492 --> 00:21:27,412 to the winklevi in that Facebook movie professor bighetti had us watch. 440 00:21:27,704 --> 00:21:29,038 And he was the hero of that film. 441 00:21:29,164 --> 00:21:31,958 And with all of us working together, we'll easily beat you to market. 442 00:21:32,292 --> 00:21:34,127 So, that's how it goes, huh? Hmm? 443 00:21:34,711 --> 00:21:38,006 You steal a man's idea, rendering his company worthless? 444 00:21:40,467 --> 00:21:45,096 I've read a number of disparaging articles about your generation in the Atlantic 445 00:21:45,221 --> 00:21:46,681 and slate. Com summaries. 446 00:21:46,973 --> 00:21:48,391 It's all true. 447 00:21:49,309 --> 00:21:50,894 Trigger warning, fuck you. 448 00:21:52,937 --> 00:21:54,731 Professor bighetti, I'll see you at home. 449 00:21:57,567 --> 00:21:58,902 You apologize? 450 00:21:59,027 --> 00:22:01,446 In this case, yes, I apologize. 451 00:22:01,571 --> 00:22:04,741 Who am I to advise you on your very valuable company? 452 00:22:04,991 --> 00:22:06,659 It's time to let you go, like a bird. 453 00:22:06,784 --> 00:22:09,120 So, go out there, without me. 454 00:22:09,245 --> 00:22:10,538 Make your recipe app. 455 00:22:10,747 --> 00:22:12,165 Take your meetings. 456 00:22:12,582 --> 00:22:13,625 Live. 457 00:22:13,708 --> 00:22:18,755 That being said, since there's no cash to buy me out, I propose this. 458 00:22:19,464 --> 00:22:23,426 Allow me to keep the palapa, and give me the 'vette. 459 00:22:23,718 --> 00:22:24,928 You're cashing out? 460 00:22:25,929 --> 00:22:27,764 Dinesh, stay out of this please. 461 00:22:27,931 --> 00:22:29,849 Car and a hut for 10%. 462 00:22:30,099 --> 00:22:31,309 It's a palapa. 463 00:22:31,601 --> 00:22:32,936 Okay. It's a deal. 464 00:22:34,604 --> 00:22:36,231 You know, the car was a mistake. 465 00:22:37,065 --> 00:22:39,359 I was driving next to a store window. 466 00:22:39,776 --> 00:22:42,403 And I stop and look in my reflection. 467 00:22:43,238 --> 00:22:44,614 I look like an asshole. 468 00:22:45,198 --> 00:22:47,116 Yes, I'm sure it was just the car. 469 00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:49,702 A little piece of advice regarding American culture. 470 00:22:49,869 --> 00:22:53,122 A corvette takes a certain sort of man to be able to pull off. 471 00:22:53,206 --> 00:22:54,541 Like a fedora. 472 00:22:54,958 --> 00:22:56,334 Anyway, keys? 473 00:22:58,336 --> 00:23:03,258 Oh, and now that I'm out of the company, you'll need to tell Monica what transpired. 474 00:23:03,925 --> 00:23:05,218 Thank you. 475 00:23:09,305 --> 00:23:13,226 Gentlemen, I'm off to be out and about in the 'vette. 476 00:23:13,393 --> 00:23:18,648 Be back for supper, that is, of course, unless I get fucked to death by the fairer sex. 477 00:23:23,945 --> 00:23:27,323 Gilfoyle, Richard would like a moment, if you don't mind. 478 00:23:29,367 --> 00:23:30,887 You guys need me to go somewhere else? 479 00:23:31,119 --> 00:23:33,788 No, it's fine. You can stay. You can hear this. Uh... 480 00:23:34,289 --> 00:23:37,500 Okay. Well, gilfoyle, I have reviewed the candidates 481 00:23:37,834 --> 00:23:41,713 and it is very clear to me that our company cannot succeed 482 00:23:41,879 --> 00:23:45,717 without your unrivaled talents as a systems architect. 483 00:23:46,009 --> 00:23:51,973 So, would you please, please, please, please come work for pied Piper? 484 00:23:54,017 --> 00:23:55,268 Thanks for asking. 485 00:23:55,351 --> 00:23:58,354 I'm going to put this as delicately as I know how. 486 00:23:59,022 --> 00:24:00,523 You can chortle my balls. 487 00:24:02,025 --> 00:24:03,318 Okay. Wow. 488 00:24:03,860 --> 00:24:06,863 So, who do we want to run front-end Dev? 489 00:24:06,988 --> 00:24:09,574 "Cunt-ass" or "fuck-jerk"? 490 00:24:10,867 --> 00:24:12,285 Listen. 491 00:24:13,202 --> 00:24:15,204 This thing with Gavin isn't gonna work without me. 492 00:24:15,288 --> 00:24:18,583 So, because I feel bad for you, and because I'd hate to see you fuck up good tech, 493 00:24:18,875 --> 00:24:22,253 which will happen if I'm not there, I'm willing to help you. 494 00:24:23,046 --> 00:24:24,213 That's a beautiful gesture. 495 00:24:24,631 --> 00:24:26,341 So, you're back aboard? 496 00:24:27,216 --> 00:24:31,804 Fyi, Becca thorton is a cancerous prolapsed anus of a human being, 497 00:24:32,055 --> 00:24:34,182 but as a systems engineer, she's not all bad. 498 00:24:37,352 --> 00:24:38,394 Laune? 499 00:24:38,603 --> 00:24:41,397 Oh! Yes. Monica, come in. I just heard the good news. 500 00:24:41,898 --> 00:24:43,024 About... 501 00:24:43,274 --> 00:24:45,443 Jian-Yang's nimble pivot. 502 00:24:45,902 --> 00:24:47,612 Back away from the glass, please. 503 00:24:48,029 --> 00:24:49,280 Special occasion! 504 00:24:51,532 --> 00:24:53,826 He told me the whole story. 505 00:24:54,160 --> 00:24:56,162 His interview at periscope, 506 00:24:56,245 --> 00:24:59,999 his discovery of the photo of bachman's genitals on his phone, 507 00:25:00,083 --> 00:25:01,459 when demonstrating the app, 508 00:25:02,043 --> 00:25:03,419 and his Eureka moment. 509 00:25:03,544 --> 00:25:06,631 When it turned out that his "not hot dog" technology 510 00:25:06,714 --> 00:25:09,550 outperformed periscope's own technology. 511 00:25:10,843 --> 00:25:12,095 He said all that? 512 00:25:12,845 --> 00:25:13,846 Not quickly. 513 00:25:13,971 --> 00:25:16,307 The eventual point, jian-Yang 514 00:25:16,391 --> 00:25:19,602 unwittingly crafted an amazing tool for the real-time detection 515 00:25:19,727 --> 00:25:21,938 and filtering of penile imagery. 516 00:25:22,772 --> 00:25:24,941 I mean, periscope does have a dick problem. 517 00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:26,609 Monica. Ugh. 518 00:25:28,152 --> 00:25:31,155 Jian-Yang went to periscope for a job, 519 00:25:31,239 --> 00:25:34,200 and walked out with a $4 million acquisition offer. 520 00:25:34,325 --> 00:25:37,829 Given our liquidation preference, we have 10-x'd in two weeks. 521 00:25:37,954 --> 00:25:39,831 So, hats off. 522 00:25:40,039 --> 00:25:41,916 Well, thank you so much... 523 00:25:41,999 --> 00:25:48,131 To ed chen for his shrewd call, both to invest in this and make you lead. 524 00:25:48,631 --> 00:25:50,883 He is quite astute. 525 00:25:51,884 --> 00:25:54,011 Which is why we've promoted him to senior partner. 526 00:25:54,387 --> 00:25:55,471 Yeah. 527 00:25:57,974 --> 00:25:59,767 Monica, you've got erlich. 528 00:25:59,892 --> 00:26:02,562 I'm here with jian-Yang and he just told me 529 00:26:02,645 --> 00:26:07,316 that you traded 10% of the company for a used car and a... 530 00:26:07,859 --> 00:26:08,860 A hut. 531 00:26:09,110 --> 00:26:10,236 A hut? 532 00:26:10,486 --> 00:26:12,697 A palapa. And so what? 533 00:26:14,866 --> 00:26:17,702 What do you mean it's a half-a-million-dollar palapa? 534 00:26:19,912 --> 00:26:22,206 Jian-Yang: Erlich, is the refrigerator running? 535 00:26:23,291 --> 00:26:24,834 It's Mike hunt. 536 00:26:25,084 --> 00:26:26,461 And he's rich. 537 00:26:30,882 --> 00:26:32,216 Shit! 538 00:26:35,261 --> 00:26:38,014 Oh, hey, um, when you begged Richard for the job, 539 00:26:38,264 --> 00:26:41,184 did you actually, like, literally lick his boots? 540 00:26:41,267 --> 00:26:44,187 Or did you just go, like, "pretty please, Richard? 541 00:26:44,353 --> 00:26:45,938 "Please, can I have a job, Richard?" 542 00:26:46,022 --> 00:26:50,401 Whatever I did, it was worth it for the chance to work without you. 543 00:26:51,360 --> 00:26:54,697 Speaking of, did your deal with periscope ever close? 544 00:26:56,032 --> 00:26:58,826 If I stay a year, I vest a big chunk of Twitter stock. 545 00:26:59,327 --> 00:27:00,703 - Great. - Dinesh: Great. 546 00:27:01,370 --> 00:27:05,124 And what exactly are you working on? 547 00:27:05,625 --> 00:27:08,795 Oh, you know, we're tuning our algorithm. 548 00:27:08,878 --> 00:27:10,421 We're reconfiguring our 549 00:27:11,047 --> 00:27:12,924 classifier from food to 550 00:27:15,468 --> 00:27:16,719 another purpose. 551 00:27:17,595 --> 00:27:18,596 Uh-huh. 552 00:27:19,013 --> 00:27:23,392 In other words, you sit around and look at dick pics all day long. 553 00:27:23,559 --> 00:27:25,186 Don't let me stop you. 554 00:27:28,523 --> 00:27:29,524 Wow. 555 00:27:30,566 --> 00:27:34,570 I would say not safe for work, but this is your work. 556 00:27:35,404 --> 00:27:36,614 For a year. 557 00:27:37,406 --> 00:27:38,783 At least. 558 00:27:43,079 --> 00:27:44,455 Is that one 559 00:27:45,456 --> 00:27:47,083 actually a hot dog? 560 00:27:50,586 --> 00:27:51,754 Nope. 561 00:27:53,172 --> 00:27:54,632 Not hot dog.