1 00:00:08,843 --> 00:00:11,179 How the fuck does something like this happen? 2 00:00:11,721 --> 00:00:13,806 How does an elephantjust die? 3 00:00:14,140 --> 00:00:17,059 He was very old and depressed. 4 00:00:17,518 --> 00:00:19,395 He'd recently been rescued from the circus, 5 00:00:19,478 --> 00:00:22,356 but as it turns out, he actually really loved performing. 6 00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:24,233 Who gives a fuck about the elephant? 7 00:00:24,609 --> 00:00:27,278 What about me? This does not look good. 8 00:00:27,361 --> 00:00:29,906 I'm having a bit of trouble figuring out how to remove him. 9 00:00:29,989 --> 00:00:32,533 - He weighs 9,000 pounds. - Cut it up. 10 00:00:33,284 --> 00:00:34,702 Take it out in pieces. 11 00:00:34,785 --> 00:00:38,497 I don't mean to interrupt, but I could call in a personal favor 12 00:00:38,581 --> 00:00:42,168 and get a helo crew out of Travis afb with a sikorsky skycrane to airlift it out 13 00:00:42,251 --> 00:00:43,931 and drop it in the ocean right after dark. 14 00:00:44,128 --> 00:00:45,630 No muss, no fuss. 15 00:00:46,380 --> 00:00:49,634 There. Was that so hard, patrice? Because hoover sure didn't think so. 16 00:00:49,884 --> 00:00:51,802 I mean, I just found my footing again, 17 00:00:52,178 --> 00:00:55,306 and you put me in danger of losing it all over some fucking elephant? 18 00:00:56,641 --> 00:00:59,936 Gavin, you always said that here at hooli, 19 00:01:00,019 --> 00:01:03,898 in order to achieve greatness, we must first achieve goodness. 20 00:01:03,981 --> 00:01:05,149 Right. 21 00:01:05,483 --> 00:01:07,151 -So? 22 00:01:08,861 --> 00:01:11,239 I was a bridesmaid at Sean Parker's wedding 23 00:01:11,322 --> 00:01:14,242 when he handed out live bunnies as plush toys. 24 00:01:14,492 --> 00:01:15,660 That wasn't goodness. 25 00:01:16,118 --> 00:01:17,245 It was badness. 26 00:01:17,995 --> 00:01:18,996 And so is this. 27 00:01:19,789 --> 00:01:23,334 You're using endangered animals just to make points at board meetings. 28 00:01:23,417 --> 00:01:26,128 I'm drawing thoughtful, zoological comparisons. 29 00:01:26,837 --> 00:01:29,966 But couldn't you just show them a picture of these animals? 30 00:01:30,049 --> 00:01:33,052 A simple hooli search would yield thousands of choices. 31 00:01:33,135 --> 00:01:36,973 Patrice, I thank you for your honesty, and I will repay you with my own. 32 00:01:37,223 --> 00:01:39,392 I honestly never want to see you in my offices again. 33 00:01:39,850 --> 00:01:40,935 You're fired. 34 00:01:41,811 --> 00:01:44,563 - Hoover, scramble that skycrane. - Yes, sir. 35 00:01:57,451 --> 00:01:59,996 Please, come in. Come in. Have a seat. 36 00:02:00,288 --> 00:02:02,957 I won't take a lot of your time. I promise. 37 00:02:03,541 --> 00:02:05,501 - Okay. - Would you like some tea? 38 00:02:05,876 --> 00:02:07,420 I can put a kettle on the hot plate. 39 00:02:08,421 --> 00:02:11,132 - Oh, no, I'm fine. Thank you. - There's no trouble. 40 00:02:11,215 --> 00:02:13,467 You know what, I have a box of Russell stovers 41 00:02:13,884 --> 00:02:16,884 - if the spiders didn't get into 'em. - Jared, is this about the fake users? 42 00:02:19,223 --> 00:02:20,224 You know? 43 00:02:20,308 --> 00:02:23,394 Two days ago, I wanted to look at user behavior to figure out 44 00:02:23,477 --> 00:02:26,522 what spurred the sudden uptick, and well, I noticed something. 45 00:02:26,939 --> 00:02:30,568 Almost all of our new users were just uploading a single photo 46 00:02:30,651 --> 00:02:31,777 into a shared folder, 47 00:02:32,069 --> 00:02:34,047 and then the next day, they would take the photo out 48 00:02:34,071 --> 00:02:37,408 and then put it back in the day after that and that's it. 49 00:02:37,867 --> 00:02:40,411 You know, just enough to qualify as a daily active user. 50 00:02:40,494 --> 00:02:41,996 Classic click-farm behavior. 51 00:02:42,079 --> 00:02:43,724 And then I remembered our conversation in the bathtub, 52 00:02:43,748 --> 00:02:45,750 and it just had to be you. 53 00:02:46,250 --> 00:02:48,252 Richard, I am so sorry. 54 00:02:48,586 --> 00:02:50,314 - It's okay. - Would it make you feel better to... 55 00:02:50,338 --> 00:02:52,048 - To strike me? - No. 56 00:02:52,131 --> 00:02:54,735 You had good intentions, Jared. Honestly, don't give it another thought. 57 00:02:54,759 --> 00:02:56,135 Just, you know... 58 00:02:56,844 --> 00:03:00,431 You and I right now are the only ones that know about it, okay? 59 00:03:01,265 --> 00:03:03,100 And in a few weeks, when we run out of money, 60 00:03:03,184 --> 00:03:04,477 this will all be over anyway. 61 00:03:05,644 --> 00:03:07,772 - Richard? - Yes? 62 00:03:08,773 --> 00:03:10,107 We have a secret. 63 00:03:11,609 --> 00:03:12,860 Yeah. 64 00:03:14,779 --> 00:03:15,946 I mean, I swear to god, 65 00:03:16,030 --> 00:03:18,491 your dicks would have blown out of the back of your assholes 66 00:03:18,574 --> 00:03:20,368 if you had been there, hand to god. 67 00:03:20,451 --> 00:03:23,662 - Hey, guys. What's going on? - Richard, sit down. I did it. 68 00:03:23,996 --> 00:03:25,498 I saved the company. 69 00:03:25,956 --> 00:03:27,458 What do you... what? How? 70 00:03:27,833 --> 00:03:31,045 - Jared, have you been crying? - Yes, but for ordinary reasons. 71 00:03:31,379 --> 00:03:32,880 - Please, go on. - Erlich: Okay. 72 00:03:32,963 --> 00:03:34,423 I was at the rosewood for lunch. 73 00:03:34,507 --> 00:03:37,110 I mean, it was the lunch hour. I was there, I wasn't eating, the usual. 74 00:03:37,134 --> 00:03:39,387 So, I walk over to andreessen and I say something funny, 75 00:03:39,470 --> 00:03:41,514 but he stone-faces me. 76 00:03:42,306 --> 00:03:43,306 What did you say? 77 00:03:43,349 --> 00:03:45,351 It doesn't matter. The point is, it was hilarious, 78 00:03:45,434 --> 00:03:47,895 but he gave me nothing and neither did his friends. 79 00:03:48,396 --> 00:03:50,231 Then I realized why. 80 00:03:50,981 --> 00:03:53,818 - You're not funny? - No, gilfoyle, but that is. 81 00:03:54,568 --> 00:03:57,988 No, it's that everybody thinks pied Piper is in this death spiral, 82 00:03:58,072 --> 00:04:00,432 so it would be inappropriate to laugh at my hysterical joke. 83 00:04:00,783 --> 00:04:01,951 And it hits me. 84 00:04:02,785 --> 00:04:04,203 I know something that they don't. 85 00:04:04,620 --> 00:04:06,747 I know about the uptick. 86 00:04:07,706 --> 00:04:09,667 - The uptick? - Yes, the uptick. 87 00:04:11,127 --> 00:04:14,422 - The recent sudden surge in users. - Oh, yeah. That. 88 00:04:14,505 --> 00:04:17,258 Yes, that. So, while our fortune is rising, 89 00:04:17,341 --> 00:04:19,061 everybody else thinks that it's plummeting, 90 00:04:19,135 --> 00:04:22,096 and I can use these opposing forces 91 00:04:22,346 --> 00:04:25,516 to a multiplying effect like a slingshot, and then I make a decision. 92 00:04:26,642 --> 00:04:27,685 I'm gonna make a move. 93 00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:31,522 So, I say something cryptic about the uptick, and I walk away. 94 00:04:31,856 --> 00:04:33,917 - What did you say? - I don't know. I can't remember. 95 00:04:33,941 --> 00:04:36,610 But I walk over and I see mcnamee's having the short rib, 96 00:04:36,694 --> 00:04:38,654 which I hear is delicious but not too heavy, 97 00:04:38,737 --> 00:04:39,822 and then I say to him, 98 00:04:39,905 --> 00:04:42,585 "you're gonna have to tuck in your tie-dye if you want to eat here." 99 00:04:44,910 --> 00:04:46,620 - How's that relevant? - It's not. 100 00:04:46,704 --> 00:04:49,206 But the people that I just walked away from don't know that. 101 00:04:49,290 --> 00:04:53,419 All they know is that I'm over there exchanging witty banter with mcnamee, 102 00:04:53,502 --> 00:04:54,920 and about what, they don't know. 103 00:04:55,004 --> 00:04:56,714 It's all that they do want to know. 104 00:04:57,214 --> 00:04:58,799 And then, it settles in. 105 00:04:59,592 --> 00:05:00,718 Fomo. 106 00:05:01,093 --> 00:05:02,803 The fear of missing out. 107 00:05:03,053 --> 00:05:05,181 Suddenly, it feels like time is slowing down. 108 00:05:05,264 --> 00:05:07,850 I could see every move I was going to make, 12 steps ahead. 109 00:05:07,933 --> 00:05:10,561 It was like I was Bobby fischer if he could really fuck. 110 00:05:10,644 --> 00:05:12,730 I go outside, I walk across the street to greylock, 111 00:05:12,813 --> 00:05:14,064 I check in on Instagram, 112 00:05:14,148 --> 00:05:16,901 vinod khosla calls me, asks me what I doing there. 113 00:05:16,984 --> 00:05:19,403 I say, "I can't talk right now. Call me at wood opal." 114 00:05:20,237 --> 00:05:22,656 Well, he does, and then suddenly wood opal is going, 115 00:05:22,740 --> 00:05:25,034 "what's khosla got going on with bachman?" 116 00:05:25,117 --> 00:05:27,745 Meanwhile, I'm taking a leak at a restoration hardware. 117 00:05:27,828 --> 00:05:29,622 Ijack off a little bit. I don't cum. 118 00:05:30,039 --> 00:05:31,665 And then it snowballs. 119 00:05:31,916 --> 00:05:35,920 I deftly played Ross loma against index ventures. 120 00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:38,881 And because of that, the big kahuna bites. 121 00:05:40,090 --> 00:05:41,175 Sequoia. 122 00:05:41,258 --> 00:05:44,845 I spend the next 20 minutes denying calls from Jim goetz, 123 00:05:44,929 --> 00:05:46,305 over and over. 124 00:05:46,388 --> 00:05:48,849 And yes, I'm jacking off, but I don't need to ejaculate 125 00:05:48,933 --> 00:05:51,393 because by the time I listen to the messages, 126 00:05:51,477 --> 00:05:55,940 I've got offers, I've got counters, I've got counter-counters. 127 00:05:56,273 --> 00:05:57,316 Icum. 128 00:05:58,776 --> 00:05:59,985 When the dust settled, 129 00:06:01,612 --> 00:06:04,782 and the losers went home, all that was left was this. 130 00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:07,034 "Hello, Mr. Bachman. 131 00:06:07,451 --> 00:06:11,121 "Coleman Blair partners would like to offer pied Piper 132 00:06:11,205 --> 00:06:14,917 "a series b round of $6 million 133 00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:17,795 "on a $60 million valuation." 134 00:06:21,382 --> 00:06:22,383 Yeah. 135 00:06:22,466 --> 00:06:24,051 Holy shit. 136 00:06:24,468 --> 00:06:26,887 And this asshole wanted to pivot to video-chat. 137 00:06:26,971 --> 00:06:28,097 Still valid. 138 00:06:28,180 --> 00:06:30,516 Although less sexy now, I'll concede that. 139 00:06:30,599 --> 00:06:31,809 It's my Mona Lisa. 140 00:06:32,226 --> 00:06:34,144 And the entire cornerstone 141 00:06:34,645 --> 00:06:37,523 upon which I built this motherfucking cathedral 142 00:06:37,606 --> 00:06:39,650 that I will forever be remembered for 143 00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:43,862 was this beautiful little uptick. 144 00:06:46,115 --> 00:06:47,968 I think I have a bottle of cold duck in the crisper. 145 00:06:47,992 --> 00:06:49,326 Who's drinking? Come on! 146 00:06:49,410 --> 00:06:51,096 I got a bottle of Martinelli's for you, Jared. 147 00:06:51,120 --> 00:06:53,581 Erlich: This is a big day! 148 00:06:53,706 --> 00:06:56,750 We did it! Yes! 149 00:06:56,917 --> 00:06:58,562 - Dinesh: Are there any wine coolers? - I'll talk to him. 150 00:06:58,586 --> 00:06:59,712 I'll talk to him. 151 00:07:00,379 --> 00:07:01,672 Here's my hooli badge. 152 00:07:03,424 --> 00:07:05,050 And I have a hanging tag 153 00:07:05,134 --> 00:07:07,177 on my rear-view mirror for the parking structure. 154 00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:10,723 - Can I just mail that in? - No, you need to go get that now. 155 00:07:11,515 --> 00:07:12,766 Okay. 156 00:07:36,582 --> 00:07:37,791 Hey, dinesh. 157 00:07:37,875 --> 00:07:40,127 I'm just looking for erlich. Have you seen him? 158 00:07:40,210 --> 00:07:42,689 Oh, he went to the liquor store. Gotta keep the party going, you know? 159 00:07:42,713 --> 00:07:44,548 Oh, yeah. Yeah, series b. Crazy, right? 160 00:07:44,632 --> 00:07:45,841 - Oh, it's unreal. - Yeah. 161 00:07:46,425 --> 00:07:48,510 Almost like some of our users. 162 00:07:50,804 --> 00:07:51,972 What? 163 00:07:52,222 --> 00:07:55,267 - What does that mean? - Oh, "unreal" has so many meanings. 164 00:07:55,351 --> 00:07:57,394 Fake, paid for, 165 00:07:57,478 --> 00:08:00,356 one person in Bangladesh pretending to be 6,000. 166 00:08:00,939 --> 00:08:02,566 Okay. Uh... 167 00:08:03,442 --> 00:08:04,735 - All right, dinesh... - Oh, no. 168 00:08:05,569 --> 00:08:07,049 I don't want to know a fucking thing. 169 00:08:07,613 --> 00:08:08,864 Okay then. Great. 170 00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:13,118 I won't tell you anything because nothing happened. 171 00:08:13,577 --> 00:08:15,412 - Great. - Okay. 172 00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:20,334 But if something did happen, and we're not saying it did, 173 00:08:20,417 --> 00:08:21,835 the fact remains 174 00:08:21,919 --> 00:08:23,879 that leaves us in a very advantageous position. 175 00:08:23,962 --> 00:08:25,673 There's a lot of money on the table. 176 00:08:26,674 --> 00:08:28,550 And it would be a shame if that went away. 177 00:08:28,634 --> 00:08:30,434 Dinesh: You know what else would be a shame... 178 00:08:31,095 --> 00:08:35,349 Is if I couldn't find my flash drive. Gilfoyle, have you seen my flash drive? 179 00:08:35,432 --> 00:08:37,851 Right, the one with the zombie script on it? 180 00:08:37,935 --> 00:08:41,146 Why, yes, the zombie script that randomizes user action 181 00:08:41,230 --> 00:08:43,107 in platforms such as pied Piper. 182 00:08:43,190 --> 00:08:46,652 You mean so that fake users and click farms would be 183 00:08:46,735 --> 00:08:49,363 absolutely indistinguishable from real users? 184 00:08:49,446 --> 00:08:50,656 Oh, I suppose. 185 00:08:50,739 --> 00:08:52,741 I mean, especially during due diligence, 186 00:08:52,825 --> 00:08:55,577 like the kind done by vcs or possible future reviews 187 00:08:55,661 --> 00:08:58,414 done by certain regulatory bodies. 188 00:08:59,206 --> 00:09:01,291 It also had photos of my auntie. 189 00:09:02,835 --> 00:09:05,462 - Anyway, gilfoyle, have you seen it? - I have not. 190 00:09:05,963 --> 00:09:08,757 Hmm. Well, Richard, keep an eye out for it, will ya? 191 00:09:17,516 --> 00:09:20,853 Hey, gilfoyle, you wanna come inside and help me get a new flash drive 192 00:09:20,936 --> 00:09:24,398 - on www.staples.com? - Yeah, I think... 193 00:09:24,481 --> 00:09:26,000 - We're sort of done with the ruse. - Okay. 194 00:09:26,024 --> 00:09:29,278 Okay, fine. Well, whatever you did or didn't do, 195 00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:32,406 - that was serial-killer-level shit. - Gilfoyle: Agreed. 196 00:09:32,865 --> 00:09:34,950 I think I finally respect you as a ceo. 197 00:09:39,496 --> 00:09:40,622 Fuck. 198 00:09:50,466 --> 00:09:52,009 - This is fraud. - Is it? 199 00:09:53,427 --> 00:09:56,513 I mean, our platform does exactly what we say it does. 200 00:09:57,181 --> 00:10:00,434 Okay? It's not like we're lying about it like fucking theranos. 201 00:10:00,768 --> 00:10:03,103 And if our platform works, which we know it will, 202 00:10:03,187 --> 00:10:06,190 we will make them billions of dollars. 203 00:10:06,273 --> 00:10:08,567 Everybody wins, Jared. You still believe that, right? 204 00:10:08,650 --> 00:10:11,695 That, if given enough time, the platform will catch on? 205 00:10:12,279 --> 00:10:14,907 Richard, don't weaponize my faith in you against me. 206 00:10:14,990 --> 00:10:17,868 Your faith made all this possible. 207 00:10:18,368 --> 00:10:19,411 It's wrong. 208 00:10:19,495 --> 00:10:21,815 Well, every time I try to do the right thing, I get fucked. 209 00:10:21,872 --> 00:10:23,192 And if I do the right thing here, 210 00:10:23,874 --> 00:10:25,000 we're done. That's it. 211 00:10:25,083 --> 00:10:26,883 Doesn't seem like much of an option, does it? 212 00:10:30,714 --> 00:10:32,841 Dang, they're all just so good. 213 00:10:34,218 --> 00:10:36,338 Secretary: Gavin, cj cantwell, line one. 214 00:10:36,804 --> 00:10:38,347 Dang, let's pick this up tomorrow. 215 00:10:41,433 --> 00:10:44,561 - Cj. - I'm finishing a story I'd love a comment on. 216 00:10:44,645 --> 00:10:49,066 It's about the death of an unpermitted Indian elephant named Maurice, 217 00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:52,319 in your sculpture garden and its subsequent illegal dumping 218 00:10:52,402 --> 00:10:53,737 in the San Francisco bay. 219 00:10:53,821 --> 00:10:57,115 - That's preposterous. - Mmm, I have a very good source. 220 00:10:58,951 --> 00:11:00,410 What do you propose we do here? 221 00:11:00,953 --> 00:11:02,246 Cj: Well, [have one idea. 222 00:11:02,830 --> 00:11:04,414 And what, pray tell, might that be? 223 00:11:05,457 --> 00:11:08,877 Cj sold the blog for $2 million. 224 00:11:08,961 --> 00:11:10,754 No shit. 225 00:11:11,338 --> 00:11:12,589 Bachmanity rides again. 226 00:11:12,673 --> 00:11:14,007 Well, not exactly. 227 00:11:14,424 --> 00:11:17,678 Uh, I called big head to tell him that our share was worth half a mil each, 228 00:11:17,970 --> 00:11:22,432 and not five minutes later, his father, one Nelson bighetti sr., 229 00:11:22,891 --> 00:11:24,810 called me and explained that I was never to have 230 00:11:24,893 --> 00:11:29,273 any financial dealings with his son in perpetuity, ever, 231 00:11:29,523 --> 00:11:31,358 or he would get very Italian on me. 232 00:11:32,109 --> 00:11:34,194 And I'm not interested to find out what that means. 233 00:11:34,736 --> 00:11:38,073 - Okay. Shall we? - To Coleman Blair! Let's close this fucker. 234 00:11:38,156 --> 00:11:39,324 Good luck, fellas. 235 00:12:05,934 --> 00:12:08,186 Remember, you just sit there and look pretty. 236 00:12:08,979 --> 00:12:10,522 Leave all the talking to me. 237 00:12:10,606 --> 00:12:14,776 And if you mention my montblanc, then don't make it overt, like I told you to. 238 00:12:14,860 --> 00:12:16,180 But do. 239 00:12:19,740 --> 00:12:20,741 Hey, what's up? 240 00:12:20,824 --> 00:12:22,868 Are you guys out raising money from someone else? 241 00:12:23,660 --> 00:12:26,038 Oh, Monica, it's kind of a long story. 242 00:12:26,121 --> 00:12:27,289 Why are you whispering? 243 00:12:28,498 --> 00:12:30,338 Oh, my god, you're there right now, aren't you? 244 00:12:30,834 --> 00:12:32,252 Jesus! Do you have any idea 245 00:12:32,336 --> 00:12:34,256 how big of an asshole you're making me look here? 246 00:12:34,338 --> 00:12:36,506 Laurie just lost her shit at me, okay? 247 00:12:36,590 --> 00:12:38,926 So, you need to turn around and walk the hell out of there. 248 00:12:39,468 --> 00:12:41,571 Erlich put all this together. I really had nothing to do with it. 249 00:12:41,595 --> 00:12:44,848 You have everything to do with it. You're the fucking ceo, Richard. 250 00:12:44,932 --> 00:12:47,893 Whatever your company does is 100% on you. 251 00:12:48,101 --> 00:12:49,186 Gentlemen. 252 00:12:50,896 --> 00:12:53,065 - They're ready for you. - Oh. Yes. I gotta go. 253 00:12:53,148 --> 00:12:55,275 Do not hang up on me. Richard, do not... 254 00:12:57,027 --> 00:12:58,570 So listen, we're pumped, guys. 255 00:12:58,654 --> 00:13:01,698 We're thrilled to be getting into pied Piper right at this inflection point. 256 00:13:01,782 --> 00:13:04,576 - It's very exciting. - We are pumped as well. Aren't we, Richard? 257 00:13:05,202 --> 00:13:06,828 - Richard. Pumped. - Hmm? Pumped. 258 00:13:06,912 --> 00:13:09,122 - We are pumped up. - Pumped up. Mmm-hmm. 259 00:13:09,206 --> 00:13:12,292 So we'll just need your John hancock right here. 260 00:13:12,376 --> 00:13:15,837 Oh, sure, Richard. You can use my montblanc. 261 00:13:17,005 --> 00:13:18,632 Oh, the, uh... 262 00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:23,136 This is an actual term sheet. And once I sign this... that's it, right? 263 00:13:23,220 --> 00:13:24,513 Yup. No turning back. 264 00:13:27,724 --> 00:13:30,284 You can have your lawyers vet the actual stock purchase agreement 265 00:13:30,352 --> 00:13:33,081 once we close here just to make sure no one is pulling any funny business. 266 00:13:33,105 --> 00:13:35,774 - No, no. - No, my lawyer is in jail, so. 267 00:13:47,411 --> 00:13:49,079 Oh, my god. I, uh... 268 00:13:49,538 --> 00:13:52,207 Wow, I can't believe I didn't think of this before, 269 00:13:52,708 --> 00:13:54,668 because, well, let me put it to you this way. 270 00:13:54,751 --> 00:13:58,588 What would you say if I told you that the same compression that you know and love 271 00:13:58,672 --> 00:14:01,883 is being used in a world-beating, game-changing, wait for it... 272 00:14:03,510 --> 00:14:05,470 Video-conferencing application? 273 00:14:06,138 --> 00:14:08,265 Wouldn't that be interesting? 274 00:14:10,767 --> 00:14:12,686 - What? - You mean like hooli-chat? 275 00:14:12,769 --> 00:14:15,188 This will be far superior to hooli-chat. 276 00:14:15,272 --> 00:14:17,024 Richard: You may want to fund that instead. 277 00:14:17,190 --> 00:14:20,152 In fact, why don't I just go home, I'll grab my laptop, 278 00:14:20,235 --> 00:14:21,921 I'll come back here, I'll show it to you guys. 279 00:14:21,945 --> 00:14:23,506 - It's not that far. I don't mind... - Erlich: Richard... 280 00:14:23,530 --> 00:14:24,966 - I'll tell you what, I'll grab an uber. - No, no, no. 281 00:14:24,990 --> 00:14:27,093 - Richard: It's no problem. - Richard, what the fuck are you doing? 282 00:14:27,117 --> 00:14:28,136 Richard: There. I've ordered it. 283 00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:30,430 Neal is in a blue kia sportage and he's right around the corner. 284 00:14:30,454 --> 00:14:31,723 All right, all right. Look, look, look. 285 00:14:31,747 --> 00:14:34,067 I don't know who else you're talking to about the platform, 286 00:14:34,124 --> 00:14:38,003 but I'm willing to go up to seven million on 70. 287 00:14:38,086 --> 00:14:40,606 Okay? But that's it. You sign this thing, right here, right now. 288 00:14:40,964 --> 00:14:42,716 Bravo, Richard. Nice neg. 289 00:14:43,175 --> 00:14:44,301 Now sign it. 290 00:14:44,718 --> 00:14:46,136 Thank you. Very generous of you. 291 00:14:46,970 --> 00:14:50,057 I just want to make sure that you're aware of all the feedback 292 00:14:50,140 --> 00:14:52,118 'cause we had some focus groups and there were some issues. 293 00:14:52,142 --> 00:14:53,518 Just so you're clear, 294 00:14:54,144 --> 00:14:56,730 people have been wondering, "ah! Where are my files? 295 00:14:56,813 --> 00:14:59,292 - Erlich: Richard, Richard... - "Zero k used? Where's the download button? 296 00:14:59,316 --> 00:15:01,002 - "The Terminator..." - All right, all right, you know what? 297 00:15:01,026 --> 00:15:02,962 - 'Cause it... - I'm gonna sign it. Can I sign it? I'll sign it. 298 00:15:02,986 --> 00:15:05,989 You can if you want, but we still need his signature. 299 00:15:11,536 --> 00:15:12,871 Richard, sign it. 300 00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:15,082 That's two years of runway. 301 00:15:15,373 --> 00:15:16,666 - Sign it now! - I can't. 302 00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:19,503 - Why the fuck not? - Because the numbers are fake. 303 00:15:20,962 --> 00:15:22,047 What? 304 00:15:22,839 --> 00:15:24,999 - What? What do you mean? What do you... - We bought... 305 00:15:26,134 --> 00:15:29,137 Fake users from a Bangladeshi click farm. 306 00:15:30,347 --> 00:15:31,556 Richard: The uptick was fake. 307 00:15:33,517 --> 00:15:35,811 But the vid-chat... 308 00:15:37,187 --> 00:15:38,271 Is real. 309 00:15:38,605 --> 00:15:41,108 Erlich, the fake users were just meant to cheer the guys up. 310 00:15:41,191 --> 00:15:42,919 I had no idea you were gonna take those numbers... 311 00:15:42,943 --> 00:15:44,295 And what, and go do my fucking job? 312 00:15:44,319 --> 00:15:46,446 Pour everything I had into getting the best possible 313 00:15:46,530 --> 00:15:48,657 deal for pied Piper because I believe in them? 314 00:15:49,116 --> 00:15:50,367 Well, that's all over now. 315 00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:52,786 Richard, we are fucked! 316 00:15:53,411 --> 00:15:56,665 In the amount of time that it took for us to get from that office to right here, 317 00:15:56,748 --> 00:15:58,583 every vc in the valley knows about this. 318 00:15:58,667 --> 00:16:01,128 If I signed those term sheets, I would be committing fraud. 319 00:16:01,211 --> 00:16:02,420 That's a fucking crime. 320 00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:03,898 You're saying you wanted me to... 321 00:16:03,922 --> 00:16:05,841 No, I wanted you to fucking think about that 322 00:16:05,924 --> 00:16:07,985 before you paraded me around the whole fucking valley 323 00:16:08,009 --> 00:16:09,427 to sell your lie. 324 00:16:09,511 --> 00:16:12,347 And then suddenly grew a thick, girthy conscience 325 00:16:12,430 --> 00:16:13,515 and fucked me with it. 326 00:16:13,598 --> 00:16:14,641 Are you Richard? 327 00:16:15,392 --> 00:16:16,935 - Did you order an uber? - Oh, no. 328 00:16:19,271 --> 00:16:21,982 All you had to do was keep your fucking mouth shut 329 00:16:22,065 --> 00:16:23,525 and sign that piece of paper. 330 00:16:24,234 --> 00:16:25,902 We would have fixed it aftennards. 331 00:16:26,736 --> 00:16:28,238 But you didn't. You caked your pants. 332 00:16:28,947 --> 00:16:32,325 No, better yet, you caked my pants. Fuck you, Richard Hendricks. 333 00:16:32,409 --> 00:16:33,535 Fuck you. 334 00:16:35,162 --> 00:16:36,882 Richard Hendricks, huh? 335 00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:38,248 Prick. 336 00:16:45,380 --> 00:16:47,966 - Hey. - Oh, hey, Monica. 337 00:16:48,049 --> 00:16:51,636 Is Richard here? I heard what happened, but he's not answering any of my calls. 338 00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:53,430 We just wanted you to know for the record 339 00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:56,850 that we had no idea any of that stuff was going on. 340 00:16:56,933 --> 00:16:58,573 Still trying to wrap our heads around it. 341 00:16:59,186 --> 00:17:01,813 Point is, don't beat yourself up about not seeing it. 342 00:17:01,897 --> 00:17:03,690 I'm not beating myself up... 343 00:17:03,773 --> 00:17:05,901 I hope you don't think we're guilty by association, 344 00:17:05,984 --> 00:17:08,544 because then we would have to think you're guilty by association. 345 00:17:08,778 --> 00:17:09,779 Gilfoyle: Which we don't. 346 00:17:09,988 --> 00:17:12,199 Just want to let you know that we would definitely work 347 00:17:12,282 --> 00:17:13,700 with you again in the future. 348 00:17:13,783 --> 00:17:15,952 It's good to know, guys. Thanks. 349 00:17:17,037 --> 00:17:18,288 Um, is he in his room? 350 00:17:18,371 --> 00:17:20,498 I mean, he said he was. 351 00:17:21,875 --> 00:17:22,959 But... 352 00:17:24,628 --> 00:17:26,254 I'm gonna go to his room. 353 00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:28,019 Gilfoyle: Mmm-hmm. 354 00:17:30,258 --> 00:17:31,259 What's up, gleb? 355 00:17:31,343 --> 00:17:33,553 I hear Richard shit bed, huh? 356 00:17:34,638 --> 00:17:37,474 So, the platform is no... 357 00:17:37,974 --> 00:17:39,976 Fuck, now the vid-chat's fucking up. 358 00:17:40,936 --> 00:17:43,230 Odd, considering who wrote the code for it. 359 00:17:43,313 --> 00:17:45,482 Not the code. The server is overloaded. 360 00:17:45,899 --> 00:17:48,193 How is that possible? We only gave it to, like, 12 people. 361 00:17:48,652 --> 00:17:51,279 Well, there's a few more than that using it now. 362 00:17:52,405 --> 00:17:53,448 Holy shit. 363 00:17:53,740 --> 00:17:56,326 For what it's worth, Richard, I think you did the right thing. 364 00:17:56,993 --> 00:17:59,746 And I can see now why you didn't want to come to us for funding. 365 00:17:59,829 --> 00:18:01,289 You were trying to protect us. 366 00:18:01,706 --> 00:18:02,832 Yeah. 367 00:18:03,041 --> 00:18:04,668 Well, I really appreciate it. 368 00:18:05,919 --> 00:18:07,212 Laurie wants out. 369 00:18:08,004 --> 00:18:11,091 Even a whiff of fraud is a mortal sin for vcs. 370 00:18:11,633 --> 00:18:14,010 She needs to wash her hands of any pied Piper business. 371 00:18:14,386 --> 00:18:15,470 She's forcing a sale. 372 00:18:16,304 --> 00:18:17,305 Fuck. 373 00:18:17,514 --> 00:18:19,057 Yeah, frick. 374 00:18:20,016 --> 00:18:21,017 Yeah. 375 00:18:21,101 --> 00:18:22,461 Monica: But it is an open auction, 376 00:18:22,519 --> 00:18:24,646 and, you know, between the fraudulent numbers 377 00:18:24,729 --> 00:18:27,440 and the real numbers, 378 00:18:27,524 --> 00:18:29,442 you guys aren't exactly killing it out there. 379 00:18:29,526 --> 00:18:31,695 So, there is a chance that no one will bid 380 00:18:31,778 --> 00:18:33,547 and you might be able to buy back your own company 381 00:18:33,571 --> 00:18:34,739 for next to nothing. 382 00:18:34,823 --> 00:18:38,743 That will have to be for literally nothing because we're out of money. 383 00:18:42,664 --> 00:18:43,704 Jared: Ow! 384 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:45,560 Jesus! Are you okay? 385 00:18:45,709 --> 00:18:46,835 Jared: Yeah, we're fine. 386 00:18:48,336 --> 00:18:51,798 All right, I spun together a few more servers. That should handle the traffic. 387 00:18:52,090 --> 00:18:55,635 Look at this. There are 157 people using it near gleb. 388 00:18:55,719 --> 00:18:58,346 And 400 people using it near Tara in Boston. 389 00:18:58,763 --> 00:19:01,203 Yeah, I told her to give it to her satanist friends out there. 390 00:19:01,391 --> 00:19:02,517 Looks like she did. 391 00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:05,145 She knows 400 satanists in Boston? 392 00:19:06,313 --> 00:19:08,690 The catholic church really did a number on that town. 393 00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:15,071 Hey, erlich, remember when gilfoyle said that my video-chat app was a piece of shit 394 00:19:15,155 --> 00:19:16,698 and that nobody would ever use it? 395 00:19:17,073 --> 00:19:20,243 Well, he was wrong. Over 4,000 times. Tsk. 396 00:19:20,702 --> 00:19:23,538 Wow. And you developed that with the pied Piper ip, right? 397 00:19:24,247 --> 00:19:25,749 Well, then you can kiss that goodbye. 398 00:19:27,083 --> 00:19:28,168 Oh, fuck. 399 00:19:28,251 --> 00:19:32,922 Speaking of, I'm actually using the first dollars of my blog windfall 400 00:19:33,006 --> 00:19:35,133 on a trip to kainchi dham ashram 401 00:19:35,216 --> 00:19:37,010 in nainital, India, 402 00:19:37,093 --> 00:19:41,556 where Steve Jobs famously sought peace and came up with the idea 403 00:19:41,639 --> 00:19:43,433 for a little product he called 404 00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:44,976 the Lisa. 405 00:19:45,769 --> 00:19:46,811 Good luck. 406 00:19:48,730 --> 00:19:53,109 Richard, I'll expect you off the premises by end of day. 407 00:19:53,777 --> 00:19:55,111 Monica. 408 00:19:57,322 --> 00:19:58,823 - I'll see you later. - Okay. 409 00:19:59,324 --> 00:20:01,034 You know, you can stay here for one year. 410 00:20:01,576 --> 00:20:03,536 - Free rent. - Erlich: Jian-Yang! 411 00:20:06,831 --> 00:20:07,999 Gavin: Laurie. 412 00:20:11,002 --> 00:20:12,170 Gavin. 413 00:20:12,253 --> 00:20:13,463 You know Jack, of course. 414 00:20:14,297 --> 00:20:15,590 That is correct. 415 00:20:16,132 --> 00:20:18,510 Gavin, can we address the elephant in the room? 416 00:20:20,011 --> 00:20:21,721 - Sorry? - Pied Piper. 417 00:20:22,305 --> 00:20:24,224 Right. Yes, of course. 418 00:20:24,307 --> 00:20:26,309 I am forcing a sale. 419 00:20:26,976 --> 00:20:29,938 Your maleant dealings demonstrate that you're still pursuing middle-out. 420 00:20:30,021 --> 00:20:31,940 Might you be interested in placing a bid? 421 00:20:32,023 --> 00:20:33,942 Why would he want to bail out raviga? 422 00:20:34,025 --> 00:20:37,320 You said it yourself, our compression play is thriving. 423 00:20:37,821 --> 00:20:40,824 - Fair enough. - You know what? I'm a completionist. 424 00:20:41,324 --> 00:20:45,161 Even if! Buy it just to throw it in the garbage, I'd like to be the one to drive the final nail 425 00:20:45,245 --> 00:20:46,538 in the Hendricks coffin. 426 00:20:46,621 --> 00:20:47,831 I'll give you... 427 00:20:49,207 --> 00:20:51,127 Nine hundred dollars for it? 428 00:20:51,334 --> 00:20:53,253 - I believe that is a joke. - You know what? 429 00:20:53,586 --> 00:20:55,296 I like nice, round numbers. 430 00:20:56,131 --> 00:20:57,257 Make it... 431 00:20:58,216 --> 00:20:59,467 A million? 432 00:21:00,218 --> 00:21:01,469 A million dollars? 433 00:21:01,553 --> 00:21:05,265 Gavin belson gets to buy pied Piper for a million dollars 434 00:21:05,348 --> 00:21:08,226 and raviga gets all of it because of their liquidation preference 435 00:21:08,309 --> 00:21:09,436 and I getjack shit? 436 00:21:09,519 --> 00:21:11,354 Is that what you're telling me? God damn it. 437 00:21:11,813 --> 00:21:14,065 I know this is the last way that you wanted it to end. 438 00:21:14,399 --> 00:21:15,567 I'm really sorry. 439 00:21:15,650 --> 00:21:17,902 Yeah, well, I'll see you at the meeting. 440 00:21:18,653 --> 00:21:19,779 Is that hooli-chat? 441 00:21:20,196 --> 00:21:22,436 They fix it or something? That didn't look shitty at all. 442 00:21:22,574 --> 00:21:25,410 Actually, it's ours. The guys hacked it together. 443 00:21:25,493 --> 00:21:28,246 - I can send you an invite if you want. - Yeah. Cool. Thanks. 444 00:21:28,329 --> 00:21:31,458 - We got up to 4k users totally organically. - Oh. 445 00:21:31,541 --> 00:21:33,251 Oh, shit, 7k now. 446 00:21:35,086 --> 00:21:37,547 Wow, we should have been focusing on this instead. 447 00:21:37,755 --> 00:21:38,798 Not that it matters. 448 00:21:38,882 --> 00:21:41,718 I mean, it's all gonna be property of Gavin belson in an hour, so. 449 00:21:42,177 --> 00:21:43,386 That's ironic, huh? 450 00:21:44,387 --> 00:21:46,055 No, for real, I'm asking. Is it? 451 00:21:46,931 --> 00:21:48,251 I don't know. I was just smiling. 452 00:21:48,933 --> 00:21:49,976 Feels ironic. 453 00:21:51,936 --> 00:21:53,730 Hey, so thank you for... 454 00:21:54,230 --> 00:21:55,857 - Letting me stay here. - No worries. 455 00:21:55,940 --> 00:21:57,960 Steve says you're welcome to take my spot on the couch 456 00:21:57,984 --> 00:22:00,570 until you can find a job and get your own place. 457 00:22:00,653 --> 00:22:01,821 Thanks. 458 00:22:01,905 --> 00:22:04,282 So, when's your dad coming to pick you up? 459 00:22:05,158 --> 00:22:06,367 A couple of hours, I guess. 460 00:22:06,451 --> 00:22:09,329 Then we're turning right around and going back to Phoenix. 461 00:22:09,412 --> 00:22:13,166 You know, he said he wants to be able to keep an eye on me and my money 462 00:22:13,249 --> 00:22:17,003 and that I need to get a real job to learn the value of a hard day's night 463 00:22:17,086 --> 00:22:18,421 or something like that. 464 00:22:19,255 --> 00:22:21,966 Well, I should probably get going to this board meeting. 465 00:22:22,675 --> 00:22:25,595 And you're probably gonna be gone when I'm back, so... 466 00:22:26,846 --> 00:22:28,640 - Guess this is it. - Yeah, I guess so. 467 00:22:29,057 --> 00:22:30,099 See ya. 468 00:22:30,517 --> 00:22:31,518 Both: Oh... 469 00:22:32,393 --> 00:22:33,770 - Okay. - Okay. 470 00:22:33,853 --> 00:22:35,897 - All right. Cool, man. - There we go. 471 00:22:43,905 --> 00:22:46,533 Richard, even though it's the last board meeting 472 00:22:46,616 --> 00:22:48,368 and essentially meaningless, 473 00:22:49,285 --> 00:22:52,038 thank you for letting me be a part of it. It's an honor. 474 00:22:52,455 --> 00:22:54,207 Okay, you don't have to keep saying that. 475 00:22:56,960 --> 00:22:58,628 Good day, all. This should be brief. 476 00:22:59,128 --> 00:23:02,632 The only item on the agenda is, of course, the authorization 477 00:23:02,715 --> 00:23:04,568 of the sale of pied Piper to the current high bidder. 478 00:23:04,592 --> 00:23:06,386 Three "yes" votes will approve the sale. 479 00:23:06,469 --> 00:23:09,138 And as raviga controls three of the board seats, 480 00:23:09,222 --> 00:23:10,557 - it seems... - I'm sorry. 481 00:23:12,767 --> 00:23:14,852 - I'm not doing it. - Oh, Monica, not again. 482 00:23:14,936 --> 00:23:17,313 I'm sorry, but look, Richard has worked too hard 483 00:23:17,397 --> 00:23:19,566 and I know that I can't stop it, but I'm not gonna vote 484 00:23:19,649 --> 00:23:22,026 to let pied Piper become the property of that asshole. 485 00:23:22,110 --> 00:23:25,613 Monica, I also happen to find him contemptible. 486 00:23:25,989 --> 00:23:28,658 But pied Piper will be sold to the high bidder, period. 487 00:23:28,741 --> 00:23:29,993 You know what? I don't care. 488 00:23:30,660 --> 00:23:32,078 You want to fire me, fire me. 489 00:23:32,161 --> 00:23:35,665 If we're not gonna adhere to the values that Peter Gregory instilled, 490 00:23:35,999 --> 00:23:38,477 - then I don't think I belong here. - Monica, you don't have to do this. 491 00:23:38,501 --> 00:23:40,701 - I'm not voting yes. - Very well. You're off the board. 492 00:23:41,838 --> 00:23:43,423 Excuse me. Man. 493 00:23:45,258 --> 00:23:47,760 - Do you work here? - Well, it was my first day actually. 494 00:23:47,844 --> 00:23:49,512 - Everybody's been super... - Sit. 495 00:23:49,596 --> 00:23:52,473 You are now officially on the board of directors of pied Piper. 496 00:23:53,016 --> 00:23:56,936 - Oh, okay. That's fine I guess... - When I point to you, you will vote yes. 497 00:23:57,020 --> 00:23:59,188 Now, I move to vote on the sale of pied Piper. 498 00:23:59,522 --> 00:24:00,648 I vote yes. 499 00:24:01,482 --> 00:24:03,860 - I vote yes. - And Evan. 500 00:24:06,112 --> 00:24:07,280 Laurie: Evan? 501 00:24:08,823 --> 00:24:11,117 - I can't do it. - What? Why? 502 00:24:11,534 --> 00:24:12,702 Because_. 503 00:24:14,078 --> 00:24:15,079 Monica? 504 00:24:16,372 --> 00:24:17,540 I love you. 505 00:24:17,624 --> 00:24:19,125 There. I said it. 506 00:24:19,876 --> 00:24:21,395 And I could never do anything to make you sad. 507 00:24:21,419 --> 00:24:23,856 Oh, for fuck's sake. Do I have to pull the receptionist in here? 508 00:24:23,880 --> 00:24:25,882 How does this compare with a typical board meeting? 509 00:24:25,965 --> 00:24:28,760 All right, stop. Everybody, just stop. 510 00:24:28,843 --> 00:24:30,946 We all know how this is gonna go, so let's just get it over with. 511 00:24:30,970 --> 00:24:32,013 All right? 512 00:24:33,014 --> 00:24:35,558 I vote yes. There. Okay? I approve the sale. 513 00:24:35,933 --> 00:24:38,394 Three "yes" votes. Can this please just be done? 514 00:24:38,728 --> 00:24:39,729 Very well. 515 00:24:39,812 --> 00:24:41,356 - I vote yes also. - Irrelevant. 516 00:24:42,482 --> 00:24:44,734 - But thank you. - The sale is approved. 517 00:24:44,817 --> 00:24:47,111 Pied Piper, its ip, and all of its assets 518 00:24:47,195 --> 00:24:49,781 are now officially the property of bachmanity, llc. 519 00:24:51,783 --> 00:24:53,743 Wait, sorry, did... 520 00:24:54,410 --> 00:24:56,245 Did you just say "bachmanity"? 521 00:24:57,538 --> 00:25:01,167 - As in erlich bachman and Nelson bighetti? - Yes, you know them. 522 00:25:02,126 --> 00:25:04,420 Wait, they had the highest bid? 523 00:25:05,254 --> 00:25:08,341 I received a telephone call approximately 30 minutes ago 524 00:25:08,424 --> 00:25:11,678 entering a bid of one million and one dollars with a firm no-shop clause. 525 00:25:11,761 --> 00:25:15,014 So, when you were referring to the person who bought pied Piper 526 00:25:15,098 --> 00:25:18,976 as a contemptible asshole, you were talking about erlich? 527 00:25:19,769 --> 00:25:22,939 To which contemptible asshole did you think I was referring? 528 00:25:23,523 --> 00:25:24,524 Gavin belson. 529 00:25:27,276 --> 00:25:28,903 Isee.no. 530 00:25:29,987 --> 00:25:33,074 This meeting is adjourned. I thank you all for your time. 531 00:25:36,619 --> 00:25:39,247 So, bachmanity it is. 532 00:25:41,999 --> 00:25:43,334 That's good. 533 00:25:43,918 --> 00:25:46,629 So, should we give this thing a shot? 534 00:25:59,308 --> 00:26:00,977 You and big head, huh? 535 00:26:05,148 --> 00:26:07,400 Sorry you had to cancel your trip. 536 00:26:08,484 --> 00:26:10,820 And look, I really appreciate all this. 537 00:26:11,320 --> 00:26:14,866 I really think this video-chat thing is gonna be something, you know? 538 00:26:14,949 --> 00:26:17,429 - I don't know if you've seen the numbers. - You want a number? 539 00:26:17,994 --> 00:26:20,455 The percentage I give a fuck about you, zero. 540 00:26:20,747 --> 00:26:21,831 It's trending steady. 541 00:26:22,290 --> 00:26:23,750 And of course I've seen the numbers. 542 00:26:24,709 --> 00:26:26,711 This is a business opportunity. Nothing more. 543 00:26:27,086 --> 00:26:30,298 Big head was your friend. He was the one that talked me into it. 544 00:26:32,925 --> 00:26:34,469 I don't trust you, Richard Hendricks. 545 00:26:36,345 --> 00:26:40,767 And it's gonna take a long, long, long time to regain my trust. 546 00:26:41,184 --> 00:26:42,351 Are we clear? 547 00:26:44,520 --> 00:26:47,398 Are we absolutely clear... 548 00:26:47,482 --> 00:26:50,693 Guys: Always blue! Always blue! Always blue! Always blue! 549 00:26:50,777 --> 00:26:52,445 Always blue! Always blue! 550 00:26:52,528 --> 00:26:53,696 Always blue! 551 00:26:55,490 --> 00:26:58,534 - Gilfoyle: You suck. - Oh, fuck, it's my dad again. 552 00:26:58,868 --> 00:27:01,746 He's gotta be so pissed. I can't believe this is happening, you guys. 553 00:27:01,829 --> 00:27:03,956 I mean, I guess now we're a video-chat company, 554 00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:06,167 but the best part of it is it's us, you know? 555 00:27:06,250 --> 00:27:08,127 Just us controlling our own destiny. 556 00:27:08,211 --> 00:27:11,047 No, the best part of it is that I own 50%. 557 00:27:11,380 --> 00:27:14,509 Well, yes, you and big head do own the entire company, 558 00:27:14,592 --> 00:27:16,469 but I am the founder, it's my algorithm, 559 00:27:16,552 --> 00:27:18,888 so I'm assuming I'm getting my original shares back, right? 560 00:27:18,971 --> 00:27:20,431 Why would you assume that? 561 00:27:20,515 --> 00:27:24,018 Well, when a tech company reboots, it's normal to have a conversation 562 00:27:24,101 --> 00:27:25,853 about restructuring the cap table. 563 00:27:25,937 --> 00:27:28,981 Good, 'cause I'm the guy that hacked together the video-chat app 564 00:27:29,065 --> 00:27:31,067 to see if that woman was hot, so... 565 00:27:31,400 --> 00:27:35,154 Yeah, but it's not gonna scale until I get in there and scrape all the dinesh off. 566 00:27:35,238 --> 00:27:38,366 Well, Laurie still hasn't called me back, so I may need a new job. 567 00:27:38,825 --> 00:27:41,619 And I'm assuming pied Piper can't afford my salary, 568 00:27:41,702 --> 00:27:43,079 so I'll need stock. 569 00:27:43,162 --> 00:27:46,207 Do we really want it to be called pied Piper anymore? 570 00:27:46,290 --> 00:27:48,376 No, yes, of course. Of course we want... 571 00:27:48,459 --> 00:27:50,229 Why do we want to change the name? It's great. 572 00:27:50,253 --> 00:27:52,463 Yeah, and we do already have the jackets. 573 00:27:52,547 --> 00:27:55,091 Big. Head. 574 00:27:56,509 --> 00:27:57,789 Big head. 575 00:27:58,761 --> 00:27:59,804 Go for erlich. 576 00:27:59,887 --> 00:28:02,890 Erlich bachman, this is you as an old man. 577 00:28:03,766 --> 00:28:07,061 Jian-Yang: I'm ugly and I'm dead. Alone. 578 00:28:08,813 --> 00:28:11,399 I'm gonna let him have this one. All right... 579 00:28:11,482 --> 00:28:14,443 Well, I'm sorry to hear that, future me. What a terrible thing. 580 00:28:14,527 --> 00:28:16,070 I'll talk to you in several years. 581 00:28:16,153 --> 00:28:17,196 Dinesh: You're up. 582 00:28:17,280 --> 00:28:19,198 All: Always blue! Always blue! 583 00:28:19,282 --> 00:28:21,284 Always blue! Always blue! 584 00:28:21,367 --> 00:28:23,369 Always blue! Always blue! 585 00:28:23,452 --> 00:28:26,163 Always blue! Always blue! Always blue!