1 00:00:07,341 --> 00:00:09,444 Richard: That was awesome. Erlich: We just fed our hogs 2 00:00:09,468 --> 00:00:11,261 to those endframe motherfuckers. 3 00:00:11,345 --> 00:00:12,489 Richard: I don't know. (Chuckles) 4 00:00:12,513 --> 00:00:13,764 Gilfoyle: Oh, shit. 5 00:00:17,184 --> 00:00:18,602 Richard. 6 00:00:19,394 --> 00:00:21,939 - I just got a call from Marc at endframe. - Yeah. 7 00:00:22,022 --> 00:00:25,108 Uh, sorry that that deal didn't go through, Russ, 8 00:00:25,192 --> 00:00:29,696 but this bake-off can be huge for us. 9 00:00:29,821 --> 00:00:32,407 And we should actually get started. We have a lot of work to do. 10 00:00:32,491 --> 00:00:33,742 Yeah. 11 00:00:34,076 --> 00:00:35,702 We have a lot of work to do, Richard. 12 00:00:36,411 --> 00:00:37,454 A lot. 13 00:00:39,122 --> 00:00:41,202 We have to drink this entire bottle of Tequila today. 14 00:00:42,709 --> 00:00:44,711 - What? - Bake-off, bitch. 15 00:00:44,795 --> 00:00:47,005 Let's get fucked up. Shots, baby. 16 00:00:47,089 --> 00:00:51,218 - Uh... I don't... I don't... - Richard, this is my own brand. 17 00:00:51,718 --> 00:00:53,470 Tres comas. 18 00:00:53,554 --> 00:00:54,781 Do you know what that means in Spanish? 19 00:00:54,805 --> 00:00:57,975 - Three... - Nope. Three commas. 20 00:00:58,141 --> 00:00:59,309 As in, the number I'll have 21 00:00:59,476 --> 00:01:01,728 when we are done kicking the tar out of endframe 22 00:01:01,812 --> 00:01:03,730 and I make that fuck pile of lntersite money. 23 00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:05,107 Am I right? Come on, shots. 24 00:01:05,232 --> 00:01:08,610 - So, you're not mad? - No, of course not. 25 00:01:10,112 --> 00:01:13,532 Okay. Yeah, sure. I'll just do one shot. 26 00:01:13,615 --> 00:01:16,785 We are going to drink to re-billionizing. 27 00:01:17,661 --> 00:01:18,704 Okay. 28 00:01:18,787 --> 00:01:20,080 To re-billionizing. 29 00:01:20,163 --> 00:01:21,498 - To re-billionizing. - That's it. 30 00:01:23,584 --> 00:01:24,585 (Gags) 31 00:01:25,961 --> 00:01:27,713 (Burping and coughing) 32 00:01:27,796 --> 00:01:29,172 One more? 33 00:01:31,425 --> 00:01:32,676 Russ... (Clearing throat) 34 00:01:34,303 --> 00:01:39,558 We need to pay our lawyers and we need to pay our engineers, 35 00:01:39,641 --> 00:01:43,437 so before you go, can you just write us another check, please? 36 00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:45,689 What? No, Richard, giving you money right now 37 00:01:45,772 --> 00:01:47,482 is the worst thing I could do for you. 38 00:01:48,525 --> 00:01:49,568 What? Why? How? 39 00:01:49,651 --> 00:01:50,652 Look what just happened. 40 00:01:50,736 --> 00:01:53,405 I threatened to walk and you turned lean and hungry, 41 00:01:53,488 --> 00:01:56,491 and you clawed your way into a $15-million deal. 42 00:01:56,617 --> 00:01:59,494 And when you win this bake-off, because I gave you no money, 43 00:01:59,578 --> 00:02:02,581 and I get my third comma back, 44 00:02:04,041 --> 00:02:05,751 I promise you this, Richard, 45 00:02:05,834 --> 00:02:07,854 I'm gonna come back here and you and I are gonna Polish off 46 00:02:07,878 --> 00:02:10,380 this entire motherfucking bottle of tres comas together. 47 00:02:10,631 --> 00:02:11,840 Put it right up high. 48 00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:15,135 Come on! Don't leave me hanging. 49 00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:18,096 That's it! That's how we do business. 50 00:02:19,931 --> 00:02:21,933 (Theme music playing) 51 00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:32,694 The nucleus ad buy will be the largest in our history. 52 00:02:33,028 --> 00:02:36,406 Awareness of this product will be unprecedented. 53 00:02:36,698 --> 00:02:39,701 Yeah. Am I the only one concerned about overexposure? 54 00:02:40,327 --> 00:02:43,163 Well, we haven't seen the platform yet, 55 00:02:43,246 --> 00:02:48,126 but we're planning on slipping nucleus to influential tech journalists and bloggers. 56 00:02:48,460 --> 00:02:50,587 Because, certainly, once they see nucleus... 57 00:02:50,671 --> 00:02:55,133 Sorry, sorry. That strategyjust sounds so inside the box. 58 00:02:55,217 --> 00:03:00,097 Might it not be more innovative to shroud nucleus in mystery 59 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:02,391 until the official rollout next January? 60 00:03:03,266 --> 00:03:07,562 Gavin, I'm sorry. Is everything okay with nucleus? 61 00:03:08,772 --> 00:03:10,357 We are on schedule, yes? 62 00:03:10,607 --> 00:03:12,693 Because based on your assurances, 63 00:03:12,776 --> 00:03:15,654 we've staked substantial resources on its performance. 64 00:03:16,738 --> 00:03:17,739 (Exhales) 65 00:03:17,823 --> 00:03:21,785 Gentlemen of the board, and Rachel, listen to me very carefully. 66 00:03:22,244 --> 00:03:24,538 Nucleus is on track. 67 00:03:24,621 --> 00:03:28,375 And you have my word that if it fails to be everything we need it to be, 68 00:03:28,458 --> 00:03:30,460 someone will be held responsible. 69 00:03:31,837 --> 00:03:34,840 Me? You want me to come back to hooli? 70 00:03:35,799 --> 00:03:39,302 No way. It's too late. I've accepted mit's offer of tenure. 71 00:03:39,386 --> 00:03:42,639 My wife, my children and my mother are already back in Boston. 72 00:03:43,432 --> 00:03:45,267 I'm here because I believe in you. 73 00:03:45,350 --> 00:03:48,729 And because I believe we didn't believe in you enough before. 74 00:03:48,812 --> 00:03:49,938 Yeah, you did not. 75 00:03:50,313 --> 00:03:53,984 Xyz was beneath your talent. Surely you felt it. I did. 76 00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:56,445 Why else would I lay it off on bighetti? 77 00:03:57,320 --> 00:03:59,740 Xyz is about the distant future. 78 00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:01,113 But we can't wait for you. 79 00:04:01,158 --> 00:04:05,120 We need you now, guiding critical components of our core business. 80 00:04:05,704 --> 00:04:08,331 Components like nucleus. 81 00:04:10,041 --> 00:04:14,337 I'm sorry. Are you offering to put me in full charge of nucleus? 82 00:04:14,671 --> 00:04:17,841 Indeed I am. You and only you. 83 00:04:18,175 --> 00:04:20,635 You'll get the credit and the glory. 84 00:04:20,719 --> 00:04:25,682 The name Davis bannerchek will be inextricably linked with that of nucleus. 85 00:04:27,309 --> 00:04:30,729 I mean, there's a chance no one will know I had anything to do with it at all. 86 00:04:33,565 --> 00:04:36,485 Gentlemen, nothing else in the truck. Stop. 87 00:04:39,863 --> 00:04:42,657 Who's done with the transcoding workrow? Me. 88 00:04:42,991 --> 00:04:46,953 Good job, Carla. Or should I say, "scrumptious"? 89 00:04:48,455 --> 00:04:49,456 (Chuckles nervously) 90 00:04:49,539 --> 00:04:51,625 Because of the board, the scrum board. 91 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:53,335 - Oh, I get it. - Yeah. 92 00:04:54,211 --> 00:04:58,340 Or just... I mean, not you. I mean, you could... you are. Uh... 93 00:04:58,423 --> 00:05:03,678 Also, thanks to everybody for forgoing your salary this week. 94 00:05:04,095 --> 00:05:08,433 Remember, if we win, bonuses all around, so... 95 00:05:09,351 --> 00:05:10,477 Go team. 96 00:05:11,228 --> 00:05:12,562 When we win. 97 00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:14,314 - (Chuckles nervously) - (Scoffs) 98 00:05:14,397 --> 00:05:15,774 That is rousing, Richard. 99 00:05:16,066 --> 00:05:18,109 Yeah, so, when we win it. 100 00:05:20,153 --> 00:05:21,154 (Computer chimes) 101 00:05:22,989 --> 00:05:24,866 Richard: Whoa. Have you guys seen this? 102 00:05:25,283 --> 00:05:27,577 Seth, the network security guy from endframe, 103 00:05:27,661 --> 00:05:30,372 just changed his linkedln status to "unemployed." 104 00:05:30,455 --> 00:05:33,041 No way. You think we got him fired? 105 00:05:33,583 --> 00:05:36,086 I bet we did. That's awesome. 106 00:05:36,419 --> 00:05:39,381 Well, we never actually breached his security. 107 00:05:39,548 --> 00:05:42,676 Remember we got Marc's iogin info and went through the front door? 108 00:05:42,759 --> 00:05:44,399 So, he didn't actually do anything wrong. 109 00:05:44,928 --> 00:05:48,598 He worked for endframe, the pieces of shit that stole our algorithm. 110 00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:52,602 Yeah. So, by the transitive property, he is, therefore, also a piece of shit. 111 00:05:53,478 --> 00:05:56,314 Well, the pieces of shit fired him. 112 00:05:56,940 --> 00:05:59,109 So, his "piece of shit" status is reversed. 113 00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:02,195 Okay, fine. So, the transitive property may no longer apply, 114 00:06:02,279 --> 00:06:04,906 but the reflexive property states everything is equal to itself. 115 00:06:04,990 --> 00:06:08,118 So, since he's a piece of shit, he's a piece of shit. 116 00:06:08,326 --> 00:06:10,370 Okay, math aside, 117 00:06:10,453 --> 00:06:14,708 the point I'm trying to make here is we didn't actually break his code. Okay? 118 00:06:14,791 --> 00:06:16,877 So, he's getting fired for no reason. 119 00:06:17,294 --> 00:06:18,694 And I kind of feel bad for the guy. 120 00:06:18,837 --> 00:06:22,632 He's probably pulling his hair out somewhere, wondering where he screwed up. 121 00:06:23,049 --> 00:06:24,092 But he didn't screw up, 122 00:06:24,175 --> 00:06:26,219 and he'll never know that for the rest of his life. 123 00:06:26,303 --> 00:06:27,470 I bet you're right. 124 00:06:27,596 --> 00:06:30,056 He probably is just ripping his hair out somewhere. 125 00:06:30,974 --> 00:06:32,726 I wish I could see that. 126 00:06:33,643 --> 00:06:34,728 Piece of shit. 127 00:06:35,312 --> 00:06:36,605 He's a piece of shit. 128 00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:39,983 (Keyboard clacking) 129 00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:53,622 (Door opens) 130 00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:54,915 Erlich: Monica? 131 00:06:56,666 --> 00:06:58,436 Did you forget about jian Yang and I's pitch? 132 00:06:58,460 --> 00:07:00,086 No, I was on my phone. 133 00:07:00,170 --> 00:07:02,672 You talking to Benson or hedges? (Chuckles) Am I right? 134 00:07:02,923 --> 00:07:04,758 - Cigarette company. - Clever. 135 00:07:05,008 --> 00:07:08,929 What if I told you there is an app on the market... 136 00:07:09,012 --> 00:07:11,848 Not now. No, no, you wait until you're inside. Okay? 137 00:07:12,682 --> 00:07:14,562 We haven't even gotten the bottle of water yet. 138 00:07:14,643 --> 00:07:19,064 Head in. I'll meet you in there. I just need to finish this call. 139 00:07:19,731 --> 00:07:21,399 Sure. Cool with a "."K 140 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:24,569 okay. 141 00:07:25,070 --> 00:07:26,196 Water. 142 00:07:28,365 --> 00:07:30,825 Jian Yang: What if I told you there is an app... 143 00:07:30,909 --> 00:07:34,412 Jian Yang, this is the assistant. We wait for the boss to pitch. 144 00:07:34,496 --> 00:07:36,206 The woman you saw outside. Okay? 145 00:07:36,289 --> 00:07:38,500 Oh, the lady who was smoking? You said no. 146 00:07:38,583 --> 00:07:41,878 Sorry. Monica was smoking? Cigarettes? 147 00:07:41,962 --> 00:07:43,088 Cigarettes. 148 00:07:43,171 --> 00:07:45,757 No, no, no. He's confused. He's Chinese. 149 00:07:45,966 --> 00:07:49,844 He's talking about this crack-addict prostitute we saw at the gas station. 150 00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:52,889 She was smoking cigarettes. So sad. 151 00:07:57,894 --> 00:08:00,605 Jian Yang, what're you doing? This is palo alto. 152 00:08:00,689 --> 00:08:02,732 People are lunatics about smoking here. 153 00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:06,736 We don't enjoy all the freedoms that you have in China. All right? 154 00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:08,196 Where people smoke all the time. 155 00:08:08,279 --> 00:08:11,700 I don't smoke. Except for special occasions. 156 00:08:11,783 --> 00:08:13,493 So, you do smoke? 157 00:08:13,576 --> 00:08:15,176 Wait, have you been smoking in my house? 158 00:08:15,245 --> 00:08:19,457 No. There's no special occasion ever happen in your house. 159 00:08:22,961 --> 00:08:25,088 See this little bald spot on my temple? 160 00:08:26,131 --> 00:08:28,174 I've literally been tearing my own hair out. 161 00:08:29,259 --> 00:08:31,845 I e-mailed gilfoyle about a dozen times, 162 00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:34,222 and all he kept sending me were these photos. 163 00:08:36,516 --> 00:08:38,518 Richard: Some woman choking. Balls. 164 00:08:38,601 --> 00:08:43,440 Choking. A pair of balls. I get it. "Choke on my balls." It's like a rebus. 165 00:08:44,190 --> 00:08:45,483 He's such a dick. 166 00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:49,612 How the fuck did he get into my system? At least give me a hint. 167 00:08:51,614 --> 00:08:52,949 Something. Anything. 168 00:08:54,826 --> 00:08:55,869 (Sighs) 169 00:08:55,952 --> 00:08:57,120 Fuck. 170 00:08:58,204 --> 00:09:00,790 What if, hypothetically, 171 00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:09,090 there was a certain ceo in your office that left his iogin information on a post-it, 172 00:09:09,841 --> 00:09:14,262 and a certain someone took it and used that to get in? 173 00:09:15,305 --> 00:09:18,975 Are you saying gilfoyle never penetrated my network? 174 00:09:19,851 --> 00:09:22,854 I'm saying you weren't fired 175 00:09:22,937 --> 00:09:26,066 because of anything to do with your security config. 176 00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:27,859 It wasn't my fault? 177 00:09:28,443 --> 00:09:30,195 - Oh, my god. - You know what? 178 00:09:31,321 --> 00:09:32,321 I'm glad I came here. 179 00:09:32,363 --> 00:09:34,467 I think it's good just to get everything out in the open... 180 00:09:34,491 --> 00:09:36,409 That piece of shit! 181 00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:38,620 Gilfoyle kept taunting me and taunting me. 182 00:09:38,703 --> 00:09:41,289 - What're you doing? No, don't call him. - Hello, gilfoyle? 183 00:09:41,372 --> 00:09:42,999 - It's Seth. - Don't mention me or... 184 00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:45,877 Richard just told me about the post-it, so fuck you! 185 00:09:46,169 --> 00:09:48,338 You just fucked with the wrong hacker. 186 00:09:48,421 --> 00:09:49,506 There's... there's kids. 187 00:09:49,714 --> 00:09:52,801 I'm gonna skullfuck your whole system. Fuck you, gilfoyle! 188 00:09:53,676 --> 00:09:57,430 Fuck you, Richard! Fuck all of you pied Piper fucks! 189 00:09:58,681 --> 00:10:03,103 I actually, don't... I don't know him. I'm just here by myself. 190 00:10:04,354 --> 00:10:05,939 Just watching and waiting. 191 00:10:06,689 --> 00:10:08,483 I love kids. Not like that. 192 00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:14,318 Why would you do that? Why would you go talk to him? 193 00:10:14,364 --> 00:10:17,200 I don't know, you know. Face-to-face meetings make things better. 194 00:10:17,367 --> 00:10:19,786 I just felt bad for the guy, and he was not doing well. 195 00:10:19,953 --> 00:10:24,040 I mean, what if! Hadn't said anything and he'd have, you know, killed himself? 196 00:10:24,207 --> 00:10:26,251 Yeah, well, there's no chance of that now, is there? 197 00:10:26,334 --> 00:10:29,045 Richard, you don't seem to understand what's going on. 198 00:10:29,129 --> 00:10:32,549 We hacked into endframe's system and stole their specs. 199 00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:35,385 You can't go traipsing around to their former employees 200 00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:38,388 telling them how we did it just to make them feel better. 201 00:10:38,471 --> 00:10:40,515 You're a fucking black hat now. Act like it. 202 00:10:40,598 --> 00:10:42,934 - What? I'm a black hat? How am I a black hat? - Shh! 203 00:10:43,017 --> 00:10:44,177 Endframe stole from us first. 204 00:10:44,227 --> 00:10:47,814 And since the negative of a negative is a positive, stealing from a thief is okay. 205 00:10:47,897 --> 00:10:49,315 It's the additive inverse property. 206 00:10:49,399 --> 00:10:51,985 Math aside, Richard, we're all black hats now. 207 00:10:52,068 --> 00:10:54,904 The point is, what are we gonna do about Seth? 208 00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:55,989 How do you mean? 209 00:10:56,072 --> 00:11:00,201 Well, I mean, we have an unemployed and very pissed off systems guy 210 00:11:00,285 --> 00:11:04,414 who very publicly threatened to skullfuck our whole system. 211 00:11:04,581 --> 00:11:07,500 He's not gonna do shit. He's a coder. 212 00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:09,419 By definition, we're all pussies. 213 00:11:09,794 --> 00:11:15,216 Look, he'll vent for half an hour and then he'll go larping and mogging 214 00:11:15,300 --> 00:11:17,260 and stroke his dick for a while. 215 00:11:17,343 --> 00:11:21,848 Even if he does try to crack us, Richard, I built our network security myself. 216 00:11:21,931 --> 00:11:23,933 - I'm not worried about it at all. - So, just... 217 00:11:24,767 --> 00:11:26,269 This doesn't concern you guys? 218 00:11:26,394 --> 00:11:30,231 Okay, because he said, and I quote, that he was going to skullfuck us! 219 00:11:31,524 --> 00:11:33,443 Oh. Hey. Hi. 220 00:11:33,902 --> 00:11:36,422 - You have a great daughter. - Woman: Come on, Ashley, let's go. 221 00:11:39,365 --> 00:11:41,284 (Cell phone ringing) 222 00:11:42,869 --> 00:11:43,870 Go for erlich. 223 00:11:43,953 --> 00:11:44,996 Thanks for outing me. 224 00:11:45,288 --> 00:11:47,832 You're gay. That explains so much. 225 00:11:48,166 --> 00:11:50,293 No, outing me for smoking. 226 00:11:51,002 --> 00:11:54,422 I was heading home when my insane boss called me into the conference room 227 00:11:54,631 --> 00:11:57,800 for some kind of anti-smoking intervention. 228 00:11:58,676 --> 00:12:02,305 "No one ever died from secondhand heroin." Yeah, she said that. 229 00:12:02,388 --> 00:12:04,474 - What did you say? - I said nothing. 230 00:12:04,557 --> 00:12:08,811 Jian Yang may have let a little something slip to your boy Friday, 231 00:12:08,895 --> 00:12:10,480 but don't worry, I covered with aplomb. 232 00:12:10,897 --> 00:12:13,274 That little weasel tells Laurie everything. 233 00:12:13,358 --> 00:12:15,568 On that topic, what did you think of his app? 234 00:12:15,652 --> 00:12:18,196 Well, the fundamental idea is sound. 235 00:12:18,279 --> 00:12:20,907 An app that helps parents find the least crowded playgrounds. 236 00:12:20,990 --> 00:12:22,200 Good. So, you understood him. 237 00:12:22,283 --> 00:12:27,288 The problem is, he's basically created the perfect tool for pedophiles to find victims. 238 00:12:27,622 --> 00:12:30,833 Yes, and pedophiles are typically not early-adopters, 239 00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:33,503 so we would miss out on that whole market. 240 00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:35,296 That's problematic. 241 00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:37,460 Well, we'll tweak it when we present it to your boss. 242 00:12:37,548 --> 00:12:40,134 I don't think what I saw was close to ready for Laurie. 243 00:12:40,969 --> 00:12:42,345 Oh, really, Monica? 244 00:12:42,428 --> 00:12:45,556 Well, I'm sorry that your boss unearthed your filthy little secret, 245 00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:47,934 but believe it or not, I actually tried to have your back, 246 00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:50,186 and I was hoping you might do the same for me. 247 00:12:50,728 --> 00:12:55,692 Then again, your judgment is suspect. You are a smoker. 248 00:12:56,484 --> 00:12:59,028 I smoke a few cigarettes a week. 249 00:12:59,362 --> 00:13:00,530 (Coughing) 250 00:13:02,407 --> 00:13:05,451 Fine. I'll ask Laurie for five minutes, but that's it. 251 00:13:05,910 --> 00:13:07,453 And tell jian Yang he better bring it. 252 00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:09,080 Monica, we may never know 253 00:13:09,205 --> 00:13:13,126 what indecipherable Chinese province jian Yang comes from, 254 00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:15,044 but I know this much, 255 00:13:15,169 --> 00:13:19,048 jian Yang was born to bring it, and you have got to try women. 256 00:13:19,716 --> 00:13:21,134 I mean, just give it a... 257 00:13:22,760 --> 00:13:25,596 I'm sure the work that you have done so far has been very good. 258 00:13:25,680 --> 00:13:29,642 But now that I am here, the real work begins, 259 00:13:29,726 --> 00:13:31,936 and time is of the essence. 260 00:13:32,020 --> 00:13:34,856 I'm gonna need status reports from every department. 261 00:13:37,525 --> 00:13:38,568 Where are we? 262 00:13:39,902 --> 00:13:42,697 We have a mobile beta on a hooliphone. 263 00:13:43,323 --> 00:13:44,449 You wanna see it? 264 00:13:44,866 --> 00:13:46,284 Hmm, yeah. 265 00:13:50,913 --> 00:13:53,249 He quit? What do you mean he quit? 266 00:13:53,374 --> 00:13:56,169 According to security, he entered the building at 9:13. 267 00:13:56,252 --> 00:14:00,590 He met with the nucleus team for 11 minutes. Then he used his key card to exit the building. 268 00:14:00,673 --> 00:14:05,178 Three minutes later, he was clocked at 73 in a 25 zone going past our daycare center. 269 00:14:05,595 --> 00:14:08,723 He never returned, and he hasn't responded to our calls or e-mail. 270 00:14:09,265 --> 00:14:11,893 Gavin, is it possible that this is a good thing? 271 00:14:12,310 --> 00:14:13,746 Bannerchek was gonna step in at the last minute 272 00:14:13,770 --> 00:14:15,730 and take a lot of the credit for nucleus. 273 00:14:15,813 --> 00:14:18,274 Now the world will know that you're responsible for nucleus. 274 00:14:18,775 --> 00:14:19,942 You and you alone. 275 00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:21,194 (Sighs) 276 00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:28,451 Not now! 277 00:14:30,661 --> 00:14:35,208 Okay, so, no attempts to externally access the system? Right? 278 00:14:35,291 --> 00:14:38,795 No sqli, xss, worms, trojans, nothing? 279 00:14:39,504 --> 00:14:43,091 Same answer as I gave you the last three days. No. 280 00:14:43,174 --> 00:14:45,927 Seth hasn't done shit. We're all good. 281 00:14:46,010 --> 00:14:49,222 Richard, your paranoia has become officially tedious. 282 00:14:49,305 --> 00:14:52,433 Okay, okay. Our platform is basically built. 283 00:14:52,517 --> 00:14:56,521 Tomorrow, lntersite is gonna start dumping 100 terabytes of video 284 00:14:56,646 --> 00:14:59,899 directly onto our server via fucking ftp. 285 00:14:59,982 --> 00:15:02,735 We are gonna be the most vulnerable we've ever been. 286 00:15:02,819 --> 00:15:04,529 And Seth is out there lurking. 287 00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:10,076 Just lurking in the darknet ready to pounce, like an Internet panther, and we don't care. 288 00:15:10,159 --> 00:15:13,955 Okay, well, frankly, your lack of paranoia is insane to me. 289 00:15:14,831 --> 00:15:17,417 Now you're paranoid that we're not paranoid enough? 290 00:15:17,875 --> 00:15:19,794 You're para-paranoid, Richard. 291 00:15:21,504 --> 00:15:24,257 - Where are you going? - To the kitchen. 292 00:15:24,340 --> 00:15:25,425 Why are you going together? 293 00:15:25,508 --> 00:15:26,717 Are you gonna talk about me? 294 00:15:29,637 --> 00:15:32,432 What're you looking at? You guys have got a lot of work to do. 295 00:15:33,182 --> 00:15:34,308 (Inhales deeply) 296 00:15:50,867 --> 00:15:51,909 I'm glad you reached out. 297 00:15:52,493 --> 00:15:57,415 And I want you to know I'm not gonna do any of those things that I threatened to do. 298 00:15:57,832 --> 00:16:02,462 Really? Just to be clear, no skullfucking of any kind? 299 00:16:02,545 --> 00:16:05,381 No. I guess I just needed to vent. 300 00:16:06,632 --> 00:16:10,219 Actually, I was pretty worried that you were gonna do something crazy. 301 00:16:11,012 --> 00:16:12,180 You can relax. 302 00:16:12,972 --> 00:16:17,477 And please tell gilfoyle I'm sorry for what I said, 303 00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:18,978 and that he can relax, too. 304 00:16:20,396 --> 00:16:23,566 You don't have to worry about gilfoyle. He couldn't have cared less. 305 00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:25,902 - Really? - Yeah. 306 00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:31,157 You know, I gotta be honest. I mean, I'm really glad I came back here. 307 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:34,368 I mean, dinesh and gilfoyle obviously said it was a bad idea, 308 00:16:34,452 --> 00:16:35,953 especially given what happened. 309 00:16:36,037 --> 00:16:39,832 But this just really restores my faith that face-to-face meetings are the way to... 310 00:16:39,916 --> 00:16:42,168 That smug cocksucker didn't think I had the skills 311 00:16:42,251 --> 00:16:44,170 to break into his system, that motherfucker. 312 00:16:44,253 --> 00:16:45,898 What? What are you... don't... Who are you calling? 313 00:16:45,922 --> 00:16:48,633 - Hello, gilfoyle. It's Seth again. - Hey, don't mention that I... 314 00:16:48,716 --> 00:16:50,927 Richard herejust told me you're not afraid of me. 315 00:16:51,010 --> 00:16:53,721 Well, you know what I'm gonna do to you now, motherfucker? 316 00:16:53,804 --> 00:16:55,306 Get out our here. Scatter. Scatter. 317 00:16:55,389 --> 00:16:57,600 I'm skullfucking the shit out of your system this time. 318 00:16:57,683 --> 00:17:01,187 How you like me now, you cocksucking, motherfucking piece of shit? 319 00:17:02,271 --> 00:17:03,856 In our initial build, 320 00:17:03,940 --> 00:17:06,901 we realized that the same geo-tagging technology 321 00:17:06,984 --> 00:17:10,613 that could be used to locate uncrowded playgrounds 322 00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:14,784 could also be used to prey on children, our greatest natural resource, 323 00:17:14,867 --> 00:17:18,287 by one of society's worst elements, pedophiles. 324 00:17:18,788 --> 00:17:22,708 The pedophile facing nature of the app would present marketing pain points. Yes. 325 00:17:22,792 --> 00:17:25,002 But under Monica's guidance, 326 00:17:25,086 --> 00:17:28,506 we realized the same technology could also be used 327 00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:35,096 to create a real-time, crowd-sourced map of an even worse segment of the population. 328 00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:37,848 - Worse than pedophiles? - Smokers. 329 00:17:39,475 --> 00:17:43,521 Because, let's face it, no one's ever died of secondhand heroin. 330 00:17:43,813 --> 00:17:44,939 True. 331 00:17:45,731 --> 00:17:46,774 True. 332 00:17:46,857 --> 00:17:50,361 With our app, users can locate and thus avoid 333 00:17:50,444 --> 00:17:55,575 these self-indulgent, self-destructive, negligent monsters. 334 00:17:55,700 --> 00:17:57,076 - Negligent? - Yeah. 335 00:17:57,868 --> 00:17:59,787 We call it "smokation." 336 00:18:00,371 --> 00:18:04,041 It's a clever hybrid of "smoker" and "location." 337 00:18:05,835 --> 00:18:07,336 It's interesting. 338 00:18:08,296 --> 00:18:09,797 It's interesting. 339 00:18:11,924 --> 00:18:14,802 Well done. Well done. 340 00:18:14,885 --> 00:18:17,680 So, what kind of term sheet do you think she's gonna lay on us? 341 00:18:17,763 --> 00:18:19,890 There's a lot of work to do, 342 00:18:19,974 --> 00:18:23,102 but you certainly knew how to play to your audience. 343 00:18:23,227 --> 00:18:25,688 So, I'd say it looks good. 344 00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:27,273 Oh! 345 00:18:27,356 --> 00:18:28,983 Today is a great day. 346 00:18:29,066 --> 00:18:30,526 What is he doing? 347 00:18:33,487 --> 00:18:34,739 Special occasion. 348 00:18:34,822 --> 00:18:35,822 (Groans) 349 00:18:35,865 --> 00:18:36,907 - Oh, shit. - You... 350 00:18:36,991 --> 00:18:39,452 You brought cigarettes in here? 351 00:18:39,535 --> 00:18:41,203 No, I take from her purse. 352 00:18:44,081 --> 00:18:45,958 Richard: Well, this is it. 353 00:18:46,042 --> 00:18:49,879 Our pants are basically around our ankles until this transfer is done. Anything? 354 00:18:50,713 --> 00:18:53,215 Again, no. Nothing. 355 00:18:53,883 --> 00:18:55,718 Okay. Well, did you sweep for... 356 00:18:55,801 --> 00:18:57,303 Unauthorized kernel modules, yes. 357 00:18:57,386 --> 00:19:00,556 I even purged the entire server hypervisor again. 358 00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:03,976 Dinesh: I know we are vulnerable, right now, but, Richard, we're covered, okay? 359 00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:05,478 We severed the prod and Dev net. 360 00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:07,748 Look, you made us put our phones in a fucking Faraday cage. 361 00:19:07,772 --> 00:19:12,401 We even killed the Wi-Fi and reverted back to this stone age hard line ethernet switch. 362 00:19:12,693 --> 00:19:14,695 Look at all this shit. Are we in the '90s? 363 00:19:15,404 --> 00:19:19,158 Richard, no one is cracking our transfer. 364 00:19:19,241 --> 00:19:24,580 Not Seth, not some rogue nuclear state, not sk3wl of fucking root. 365 00:19:25,414 --> 00:19:26,707 No one. 366 00:19:27,249 --> 00:19:31,212 And in two hours and 47 minutes, when we've pulled all of intersite's data 367 00:19:31,295 --> 00:19:35,299 onto our servers, we're golden, so just chill the fuck out. 368 00:19:36,258 --> 00:19:38,552 Do another weissman test to make yourself feel better. 369 00:19:38,636 --> 00:19:39,720 I just did. 370 00:19:40,262 --> 00:19:41,430 Still at 5.1? 371 00:19:41,722 --> 00:19:43,557 Uh... actually, 5.2. 372 00:19:44,100 --> 00:19:46,769 - Holy shit, dude. That's blazing. - Hmm. 373 00:19:47,269 --> 00:19:49,109 Wait, so, we're actually gonna win this thing. 374 00:19:49,397 --> 00:19:52,066 I don't know. Ask me again in two hours and 46 minutes. 375 00:19:52,149 --> 00:19:53,192 (Door lock jangles) 376 00:19:53,275 --> 00:19:55,444 Russ: Hey, quit all the fucking and let me in. 377 00:19:56,112 --> 00:19:57,631 - Hey, come on, why's the door locked? - Coming. 378 00:19:57,655 --> 00:19:59,936 - Are you afraid you're gonna get raped? - Jared, don't... 379 00:20:00,116 --> 00:20:03,411 What? You're locking the door now? You don't answer my texts. What the fuck? 380 00:20:03,494 --> 00:20:06,831 Russ, we're at a pretty critical juncture right now, so... 381 00:20:06,914 --> 00:20:08,165 What's that? 382 00:20:08,249 --> 00:20:11,210 That is pornography, thousands of hours of it. 383 00:20:11,585 --> 00:20:13,129 Yeah, it is. 384 00:20:13,337 --> 00:20:17,049 Russ, tomorrow, I would be happy to walk this through with you. 385 00:20:17,133 --> 00:20:19,653 Okay. No, no, I'm out of here. Just answer me this, are we good? 386 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:22,263 Uh, yes. The platform is running great. 387 00:20:22,388 --> 00:20:25,108 But it's just really fragile right now and we have a lot to focus on. 388 00:20:25,141 --> 00:20:26,741 So, again, probably tomorrow would be... 389 00:20:26,809 --> 00:20:28,894 Fine, fine, but after we have Tequila. (Laughs) 390 00:20:30,062 --> 00:20:31,480 - What? - Shots, boys. 391 00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:33,315 - I'm in. - No, no one's in. 392 00:20:33,399 --> 00:20:35,127 What are... we're not doing shots right now. 393 00:20:35,151 --> 00:20:38,904 Richard, come on, quit being such a pussy and have some Tequila with your money guy. 394 00:20:38,988 --> 00:20:40,072 You're not our money guy. 395 00:20:40,156 --> 00:20:41,383 I'm not your money guy. Since when? 396 00:20:41,407 --> 00:20:43,242 Since you stopped giving us money, asshole. 397 00:20:47,329 --> 00:20:49,623 Who's an asshole? I forced you to get lean. 398 00:20:49,707 --> 00:20:52,460 No. You forced us to hack endframe and break the law. 399 00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:54,712 And now, like it or not, I'm a fucking black hat. 400 00:20:54,795 --> 00:20:57,131 But that's okay. That's okay. That's cool. 401 00:20:57,214 --> 00:20:58,799 We're gonna win this bake-off 402 00:20:58,883 --> 00:21:01,260 and pay you enough money to go away forever. 403 00:21:01,343 --> 00:21:02,470 So, take your shitty Tequila 404 00:21:02,553 --> 00:21:04,753 and your shitty jeans with fucking metal chunks on them, 405 00:21:04,805 --> 00:21:06,140 and get the fuck out of here. 406 00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:08,851 (Richard clears throat) 407 00:21:11,937 --> 00:21:13,022 Wow. That's... 408 00:21:14,190 --> 00:21:15,316 That's harsh. 409 00:21:17,193 --> 00:21:20,488 First of all, this is not shitty Tequila. This is very good Tequila. 410 00:21:20,988 --> 00:21:24,033 400-year-old family-run distillery. Super high-end shit. 411 00:21:25,201 --> 00:21:29,163 But I guess what really bums me out is I thought we got each other. 412 00:21:29,872 --> 00:21:31,874 You know, you were my guys, you know? 413 00:21:33,876 --> 00:21:35,044 That guy. 414 00:21:36,712 --> 00:21:38,088 Bin laden. 415 00:21:40,341 --> 00:21:41,425 He fucks. 416 00:21:47,681 --> 00:21:50,226 You know what's hard about being a billionaire, Richard? 417 00:21:51,227 --> 00:21:54,438 You never know if someone likes you for you or for your money. 418 00:21:55,481 --> 00:22:00,069 And I guess, with you, it was all about the money, wasn't it, Richard? 419 00:22:01,737 --> 00:22:05,257 Don't you worry, I'll leave, and I'll even leave you the Tequila because that's who I am. 420 00:22:05,825 --> 00:22:07,409 But before I go, 421 00:22:08,744 --> 00:22:11,247 I want you to come outside and see something. It's a gift. 422 00:22:12,206 --> 00:22:14,476 Come on outside, everybody. Just... I won't waste your time. 423 00:22:14,500 --> 00:22:15,751 - Just for a second. - (Sighs) 424 00:22:17,503 --> 00:22:18,504 Man: No way. 425 00:22:18,587 --> 00:22:21,715 A mclaren 6508 spider. 426 00:22:22,758 --> 00:22:26,053 Yup, just like the one I had to sell when I dropped below a "b." 427 00:22:26,887 --> 00:22:27,972 Billion. 428 00:22:28,681 --> 00:22:30,724 What do you think, Richard? You like it? 429 00:22:31,809 --> 00:22:33,185 Uh, wow! Uh... 430 00:22:33,269 --> 00:22:36,021 I don't know what to say. 431 00:22:37,857 --> 00:22:39,191 You got this for me? 432 00:22:40,276 --> 00:22:41,360 What? 433 00:22:41,944 --> 00:22:44,572 No, I... it's for me. I bought this for myself. 434 00:22:45,656 --> 00:22:47,825 To celebrate you guys helping me get back to a billion. 435 00:22:48,117 --> 00:22:51,954 That's why I came here, to show it to you. To say thank you. I'm not an asshole. 436 00:22:52,621 --> 00:22:55,875 - You drove here with a bow on it? - No, I put it on after I parked. 437 00:22:56,292 --> 00:22:57,334 I don't understand. 438 00:22:57,418 --> 00:23:00,462 You got yourself a gift to prove that you're not an asshole? 439 00:23:00,629 --> 00:23:01,829 - Right. - (Cell phone ringing) 440 00:23:02,590 --> 00:23:04,800 Sorry. Hello. 441 00:23:04,884 --> 00:23:06,604 This is eshwar Singh, the CTO of lntersite. 442 00:23:06,635 --> 00:23:09,138 What the fuck are you doing? You're deleting all my data. 443 00:23:10,514 --> 00:23:12,808 What the hell? What the hell? 444 00:23:14,727 --> 00:23:15,728 (Keyboard clacking) 445 00:23:15,811 --> 00:23:17,813 - Fuck, I'm locked out of the system. - So am I. 446 00:23:17,938 --> 00:23:19,773 - We all are. - It's just deleting everything. 447 00:23:19,857 --> 00:23:21,191 You motherfuckers! 448 00:23:21,984 --> 00:23:25,195 It's fucking Seth. Gilfoyle, you said you had this. 449 00:23:25,279 --> 00:23:28,032 I thought I did. I don't... This is fucking impossible! 450 00:23:28,115 --> 00:23:30,552 Eshwar: You guys are killing me. I'm losing hundreds of hours of content. 451 00:23:30,576 --> 00:23:34,455 Yeah, well, we got hacked. So, pull the plug. Shut it down on your end. 452 00:23:34,538 --> 00:23:37,750 I can't. The disk is spinning at 100% and I don't have access. 453 00:23:37,833 --> 00:23:40,687 Now it's basically a fucking fork bomb, and you looked me out of my own system. 454 00:23:40,711 --> 00:23:42,046 Okay, Carla, shut it down. 455 00:23:42,546 --> 00:23:44,548 None of the system shortcuts are responding. 456 00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:46,258 Can't even sigkill the transfer. 457 00:23:46,508 --> 00:23:48,761 It's like all of our keyboards are locked. 458 00:23:49,011 --> 00:23:51,931 Okay, fucking... Eshwar, I can't really problem solve this 459 00:23:52,014 --> 00:23:53,617 and talk to you on the phone at the same time, so... 460 00:23:53,641 --> 00:23:54,993 Don't you dare fucking hang up on... 461 00:23:55,017 --> 00:23:57,102 How the fuck did Seth do this? 462 00:23:57,186 --> 00:23:58,854 Well, you said he was harmless. 463 00:23:59,021 --> 00:24:01,857 Obviously I was wrong. He must be inside as root. 464 00:24:02,191 --> 00:24:04,391 It's like he's right here in this house melting us down. 465 00:24:04,526 --> 00:24:06,726 Can you guys just shut the fuck up? I'm trying to sleep. 466 00:24:06,779 --> 00:24:10,032 Why the fuck would you smoke immediately after an anti-smoking pitch? 467 00:24:10,115 --> 00:24:12,552 - Why would you do that? Why? - Jian Yang: It's a special occasion. 468 00:24:12,576 --> 00:24:13,678 Erlich: Go to your room! Fuck! 469 00:24:13,702 --> 00:24:14,971 My keyboard isn't hooked up to anything... 470 00:24:14,995 --> 00:24:16,973 Seth is single-handedly fucking the future of this company 471 00:24:16,997 --> 00:24:18,308 and there's nothing we can do about it! 472 00:24:18,332 --> 00:24:21,210 Make it stop. Make it stop. Make it stop. 473 00:24:22,294 --> 00:24:23,587 It just stopped deleting. 474 00:24:28,342 --> 00:24:29,426 Hey, guys. 475 00:24:30,427 --> 00:24:32,429 I think it's this. 476 00:24:34,974 --> 00:24:36,894 - Richard: What the fuck? - It's happening again. 477 00:24:36,976 --> 00:24:38,995 - No, no, no! Stop doing that! - Take it off! Take it off! 478 00:24:39,019 --> 00:24:40,020 Huh. 479 00:24:43,816 --> 00:24:47,444 The tres comas bottle was on the delete key. It was... 480 00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:49,405 The corner of it. 481 00:24:49,822 --> 00:24:52,783 It was just... it just got on there. 482 00:24:56,161 --> 00:24:58,247 That's not great, but... 483 00:25:00,040 --> 00:25:01,375 Good now. Here you go. 484 00:25:02,126 --> 00:25:03,293 I'm gonna... 485 00:25:05,462 --> 00:25:06,588 I gotta go. 486 00:25:13,262 --> 00:25:17,558 Did we delete over 9,000 hours of your premium content? 487 00:25:18,517 --> 00:25:20,436 Yes, we did. 488 00:25:20,853 --> 00:25:22,604 And that is bad, certainly. 489 00:25:23,814 --> 00:25:25,649 But the way we did it. 490 00:25:26,900 --> 00:25:31,363 See, our compression is so incredibly powerful 491 00:25:31,447 --> 00:25:35,409 that we were able to delete all those files 492 00:25:35,492 --> 00:25:39,079 at a rate that until now was unthinkable. 493 00:25:40,164 --> 00:25:43,375 If we're considering just raw speed. 494 00:25:45,294 --> 00:25:48,172 So, uh, just bear in mind, 495 00:25:48,255 --> 00:25:51,467 you know, when making your final decision, 496 00:25:51,550 --> 00:25:56,889 had endframe accidentally put a Tequila bottle on their delete key, 497 00:25:58,348 --> 00:26:04,146 I guarantee, they would have struggled to delete half the amount of files that we did. 498 00:26:05,564 --> 00:26:06,607 At best. 499 00:26:08,567 --> 00:26:10,486 Or worst. I could also... 500 00:26:13,781 --> 00:26:15,181 - Ended up being the worst. - Worst. 501 00:26:15,824 --> 00:26:16,992 - Definitely. - Yeah. 502 00:26:19,161 --> 00:26:21,663 But you know what? Um... 503 00:26:24,625 --> 00:26:29,338 I'm actually glad that we came here today, all of us, 504 00:26:29,421 --> 00:26:30,756 because this is good. 505 00:26:32,007 --> 00:26:35,260 Because now more than ever, in these times, 506 00:26:37,096 --> 00:26:38,931 meeting face-to-face... 507 00:26:39,598 --> 00:26:40,974 Get out. 508 00:26:42,684 --> 00:26:45,020 - All of us or just... - Now. All of you. 509 00:26:45,521 --> 00:26:46,855 Okay. 510 00:26:49,233 --> 00:26:50,567 Thank you for your time. 511 00:26:53,362 --> 00:26:56,532 I would be remiss if I didn't mention that 512 00:26:57,699 --> 00:27:00,994 your sites are some of my primary destinations... 513 00:27:01,078 --> 00:27:02,454 - Out. - Okay.