1
00:00:00,278 --> 00:00:01,411
We found the mole.
2
00:00:01,703 --> 00:00:02,578
Who? How?
3
00:00:02,912 --> 00:00:05,870
There's no way Jeff is the mole, okay?
It's not Jeff.
4
00:00:06,745 --> 00:00:07,745
Jeff?
5
00:00:09,578 --> 00:00:13,411
Next Tuesday, Gavin Belson is
launching his Box 3.
6
00:00:13,620 --> 00:00:15,536
GAVIN BELSON: Gavin B.
7
00:00:17,411 --> 00:00:18,453
It's bold!
8
00:00:19,328 --> 00:00:22,203
You need to make a deal
with my company.
9
00:00:22,536 --> 00:00:24,953
Taking existing companies
and just calling them new
10
00:00:24,953 --> 00:00:27,411
isn't sophisticated.
That's theft.
11
00:00:27,411 --> 00:00:28,870
You make a new internet.
12
00:00:29,745 --> 00:00:30,745
It's... different.
13
00:00:30,994 --> 00:00:32,370
Where did he get our code?
14
00:00:32,370 --> 00:00:35,119
RICHARD HENDRICKS: I went to
China to do new new internet.
15
00:00:35,411 --> 00:00:36,536
Jian-Yang.
16
00:00:47,620 --> 00:00:48,953
Thanks for coming along, Jared.
17
00:00:48,953 --> 00:00:50,078
I just...
18
00:00:50,078 --> 00:00:52,703
I started picturing myself
going on camera alone, and...
19
00:00:52,703 --> 00:00:54,328
Jared: Yeah, I'm happy to be here.
20
00:00:54,328 --> 00:00:57,328
I-I did have to cancel a speaking
engagement this afternoon,
21
00:00:57,328 --> 00:01:00,578
with an underprivileged middle
school computer education class,
22
00:01:00,578 --> 00:01:03,453
but I suppose being
abandoned by a role model
23
00:01:03,453 --> 00:01:06,536
is in itself an important life lesson.
24
00:01:06,536 --> 00:01:08,495
You guys are up next.
Oh, boy.
25
00:01:08,495 --> 00:01:10,119
Hey, Jared?
Yeah?
26
00:01:10,119 --> 00:01:12,161
Um, if Emily Chang asks me a question,
27
00:01:12,161 --> 00:01:14,787
and it looks like I'm gonna
have a panic attack,
28
00:01:14,787 --> 00:01:16,119
then you should just jump in there.
29
00:01:16,119 --> 00:01:18,161
You're gonna be fine.
Look at you!
30
00:01:18,161 --> 00:01:20,662
You've got the hair of Giovanni Ribisi,
31
00:01:20,662 --> 00:01:23,286
and the complexion of Timothy Hutton,
32
00:01:23,286 --> 00:01:25,578
and the eyes of Joni Mitchell.
33
00:01:25,578 --> 00:01:28,411
You're like a...
a Mr. Potato Head of beautiful people.
34
00:01:28,411 --> 00:01:30,036
(awkward chuckle)
Plus, this is a pre-tape,
35
00:01:30,036 --> 00:01:31,828
so if anything terrible happens,
36
00:01:31,828 --> 00:01:33,328
they can always edit it out.
37
00:01:33,328 --> 00:01:34,495
Cool.
Okay, you're up.
38
00:01:34,495 --> 00:01:35,620
Okay.
39
00:01:35,620 --> 00:01:37,870
Let's, uh, slap each other?
40
00:01:37,870 --> 00:01:39,370
What?
No, no!
41
00:01:39,370 --> 00:01:41,328
It's okay. We don't have...
Yeah.
42
00:01:41,328 --> 00:01:42,994
We will never sell you ads.
43
00:01:42,994 --> 00:01:45,828
We will never collect or
sell your information.
44
00:01:45,828 --> 00:01:47,953
And people like Gavin Belson
45
00:01:47,953 --> 00:01:49,578
won't be able to profit off of it.
46
00:01:49,578 --> 00:01:52,453
So, when can people out there
get onto your new Internet?
47
00:01:52,453 --> 00:01:55,078
Well, our team of hand-picked developers
48
00:01:55,078 --> 00:01:56,912
are currently building, um,
49
00:01:56,912 --> 00:01:58,994
what you might call a theme park.
50
00:01:58,994 --> 00:02:01,370
They are building the rides,
the attractions.
51
00:02:01,370 --> 00:02:04,328
And they're making sure
everything works flawlessly
52
00:02:04,328 --> 00:02:05,828
so that on day one,
53
00:02:05,828 --> 00:02:07,662
when the doors open to the public,
54
00:02:07,662 --> 00:02:11,703
they can have an absolutely
game-changing experience.
55
00:02:11,703 --> 00:02:12,912
I like that analogy.
56
00:02:12,912 --> 00:02:14,870
(nervous chuckle)
Oh, well, thank you, Emily Chang.
57
00:02:14,870 --> 00:02:17,953
Now Jared Dunn,
as Pied Piper's COO,
58
00:02:17,953 --> 00:02:19,787
what is foremost on your mind
59
00:02:19,787 --> 00:02:21,536
as you make this big announcement?
60
00:02:21,536 --> 00:02:23,244
Me?
61
00:02:23,244 --> 00:02:24,870
Yes, you, Jared.
62
00:02:25,870 --> 00:02:27,036
Manure.
63
00:02:28,036 --> 00:02:29,078
Pardon?
64
00:02:36,536 --> 00:02:38,536
== Synced & corrected by MaxPayne ==
65
00:02:42,161 --> 00:02:44,119
Hey! How'd it go?
66
00:02:44,119 --> 00:02:46,703
Richard: Oh, well, you
know, not that bad.
67
00:02:46,703 --> 00:02:49,161
Once I got out there,
I think it went okay.
68
00:02:49,161 --> 00:02:51,828
"Okay"? He's selling himself short.
Compared to me,
69
00:02:51,828 --> 00:02:54,036
he was a regular Diane Sawyer.
Aw.
70
00:02:54,036 --> 00:02:55,411
I don't know about that.
Becky: Richard?
71
00:02:55,411 --> 00:02:57,161
Bream-Hall's
on the phone for you.
72
00:02:57,161 --> 00:02:58,953
Oh, finally, okay.
Good.
73
00:03:01,453 --> 00:03:02,495
Hey.
74
00:03:02,495 --> 00:03:05,578
Can you please tell me
what you are going to do
75
00:03:05,578 --> 00:03:07,620
about this Jian-Yang situation?
76
00:03:07,620 --> 00:03:09,453
Yes, nothing.
77
00:03:09,453 --> 00:03:11,036
What?
78
00:03:11,036 --> 00:03:11,994
Sorry.
79
00:03:11,994 --> 00:03:13,411
(stammering)
What do you mean "nothing"?
80
00:03:13,411 --> 00:03:16,495
Richard, they're developing
a gay Christian dating app
81
00:03:16,495 --> 00:03:18,828
on a platform that's been
genetically engineered
82
00:03:18,828 --> 00:03:20,912
to be ideal for political dissidents.
83
00:03:20,912 --> 00:03:22,411
In China.
84
00:03:22,411 --> 00:03:24,953
If you lose to that, Richard,
85
00:03:24,953 --> 00:03:25,953
look inward.
86
00:03:25,953 --> 00:03:28,244
Alright, so, uh, did you just call me
87
00:03:28,244 --> 00:03:30,994
to tell me that you're doing
nothing about that, or...
88
00:03:30,994 --> 00:03:32,953
No. We called to tell you
89
00:03:32,953 --> 00:03:35,370
that we are pairing you
with a new developer.
90
00:03:35,370 --> 00:03:36,953
It's one of our portfolio companies
91
00:03:36,953 --> 00:03:38,453
and they're doing
some really cool stuff.
92
00:03:38,453 --> 00:03:39,787
Monica (on phone): Eklow Labs.
93
00:03:39,787 --> 00:03:40,912
I'm sure they are,
94
00:03:40,912 --> 00:03:42,912
but we're kinda full up, so...
95
00:03:42,912 --> 00:03:45,953
We strongly encourage you
to consider this.
96
00:03:47,286 --> 00:03:48,745
Okay.
97
00:03:48,745 --> 00:03:50,745
Let me just ask, uh,
98
00:03:50,745 --> 00:03:52,453
how much have you invested in this company?
99
00:03:52,453 --> 00:03:55,994
I don't see how that's relevant.
$112 million.
100
00:03:58,286 --> 00:04:00,244
So, um...
101
00:04:00,244 --> 00:04:02,203
I don't really have a choice in this, do I?
102
00:04:02,203 --> 00:04:04,078
Of course you do.
103
00:04:04,078 --> 00:04:06,578
You are completely within your rights
104
00:04:06,578 --> 00:04:10,119
to bitterly disappoint
your largest investor.
105
00:04:13,078 --> 00:04:15,953
So... we cool?
106
00:04:15,953 --> 00:04:18,161
♪ ♪
107
00:04:18,161 --> 00:04:19,994
We cool.
108
00:04:19,994 --> 00:04:22,495
So, we're just giving a random company
109
00:04:22,495 --> 00:04:24,495
a bunch of free compute
power on our network?
110
00:04:24,495 --> 00:04:26,161
It's some company called Eklow,
111
00:04:26,161 --> 00:04:28,161
and apparently, they're a
bigger deal than we are.
112
00:04:28,161 --> 00:04:30,662
As in Eklow Labs?
The AI company?
113
00:04:30,662 --> 00:04:31,953
Yeah, I guess.
114
00:04:31,953 --> 00:04:33,662
And you said yes?
115
00:04:33,662 --> 00:04:35,286
I didn't really have a choice!
116
00:04:35,286 --> 00:04:37,828
Besides, I'm the only one
who has the security privileges
117
00:04:37,828 --> 00:04:39,787
necessary to add or delete developers.
118
00:04:39,787 --> 00:04:42,203
Okay? So I'm the one that has to
go over there and do all the work.
119
00:04:42,203 --> 00:04:44,328
I'm not worried about work.
120
00:04:44,328 --> 00:04:45,662
I'm worried about robots.
121
00:04:45,662 --> 00:04:48,662
Oh! The Bloomberg piece is up.
Oh, great.
122
00:04:48,662 --> 00:04:50,244
Hey, uh, Danny, can we...
123
00:04:50,244 --> 00:04:52,244
Can we put the Bloomberg thing
on the big screen?
124
00:04:52,244 --> 00:04:53,745
Hey, Jared!
125
00:04:53,745 --> 00:04:55,370
First time on Emily Chang, huh?
126
00:04:55,370 --> 00:04:56,703
That is my cue.
127
00:04:56,703 --> 00:04:58,328
Wait, what?
You don't want to watch?
128
00:04:58,328 --> 00:04:59,411
Oh, God, no.
129
00:04:59,411 --> 00:05:00,994
No, I don't need to relive that.
130
00:05:00,994 --> 00:05:04,286
And besides, I have a lifelong
aversion to my own image.
131
00:05:04,286 --> 00:05:06,620
You know, it's like my
foster mother used to say,
132
00:05:06,620 --> 00:05:09,078
"Donald, you have a face for the closet."
133
00:05:10,370 --> 00:05:11,870
Alright, can everyone see?
134
00:05:11,870 --> 00:05:13,703
I'm here with Pied Piper CEO
Richard Hendricks,
135
00:05:13,703 --> 00:05:16,203
and newly minted COO Jared Dunn.
136
00:05:16,203 --> 00:05:17,662
Today's a big day for you.
137
00:05:17,662 --> 00:05:19,453
Tell me what your new Internet is,
138
00:05:19,453 --> 00:05:21,994
and why Gavin Belson
should be afraid of it.
139
00:05:23,078 --> 00:05:24,745
Manure.
140
00:05:24,745 --> 00:05:26,161
Emily (on TV): Pardon?
Richard: Oh.
141
00:05:26,161 --> 00:05:28,453
Weird. Okay, they went
straight to Jared.
142
00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:29,953
I'm sure you're aware of the
143
00:05:29,953 --> 00:05:33,328
Great London Horse Manure
Crisis of 1894.
144
00:05:33,328 --> 00:05:34,453
Emily: I'm afraid I'm not.
145
00:05:34,453 --> 00:05:35,912
In the 1890s,
146
00:05:35,912 --> 00:05:39,453
the Industrial Revolution had
people flocking to the city,
147
00:05:39,453 --> 00:05:41,745
and more people equals more horses,
148
00:05:41,745 --> 00:05:43,662
and more horses equals more manure.
149
00:05:43,662 --> 00:05:44,953
And it was predicted
150
00:05:44,953 --> 00:05:46,745
that by the middle of the next century,
151
00:05:46,745 --> 00:05:49,411
there would be nine feet of manure
152
00:05:49,411 --> 00:05:50,578
covering the streets.
153
00:05:50,578 --> 00:05:52,411
But what no one saw coming,
154
00:05:52,411 --> 00:05:53,994
was a new technology
155
00:05:53,994 --> 00:05:56,870
that would completely
obliterate those concerns.
156
00:05:56,870 --> 00:05:57,912
The car.
157
00:05:57,912 --> 00:06:00,578
Over night, the manure problem vanished.
158
00:06:00,578 --> 00:06:03,078
And the Internet, as we currently know it,
159
00:06:03,078 --> 00:06:05,745
is rife with, uh, identity theft,
160
00:06:05,745 --> 00:06:07,703
and spam and hacking.
161
00:06:07,703 --> 00:06:09,411
So, it's manure,
162
00:06:09,411 --> 00:06:11,078
and we believe that, in success,
163
00:06:11,078 --> 00:06:13,745
our new, entirely
de-centralized Internet,
164
00:06:13,745 --> 00:06:16,745
will be just as
significant as the car.
165
00:06:16,745 --> 00:06:18,161
Hmm!
166
00:06:18,161 --> 00:06:20,119
Now back to me
for my theme park analogy.
167
00:06:20,119 --> 00:06:22,453
Thanks for coming in, guys.
Up next...
168
00:06:22,453 --> 00:06:23,536
What?
(Dinesh laughs)
169
00:06:23,536 --> 00:06:24,745
Wow.
(applause)
170
00:06:24,745 --> 00:06:26,244
Jared landed it!
171
00:06:26,244 --> 00:06:28,161
That was great!
172
00:06:28,161 --> 00:06:29,787
Jared was so good!
173
00:06:29,787 --> 00:06:32,662
I guess they must have
gotten rid of my stuff for time.
174
00:06:32,662 --> 00:06:35,119
Yeah, they try and keep it
just to the interesting stuff.
175
00:06:35,119 --> 00:06:36,828
Yeah. Yeah, guess so.
176
00:06:36,828 --> 00:06:40,036
Up next, the conversation
every parent dreads.
177
00:06:40,036 --> 00:06:42,828
How to talk to your kids
about the block chain.
178
00:06:42,828 --> 00:06:45,411
Hoover: Sir, I had no idea
they were this far along.
179
00:06:45,411 --> 00:06:46,870
I don't know what to say.
180
00:06:46,870 --> 00:06:48,828
My mole has failed us.
181
00:06:48,828 --> 00:06:50,912
I've never been more
sorry in my entire life.
182
00:06:50,912 --> 00:06:52,453
You must be furious.
183
00:06:52,453 --> 00:06:54,578
That's the thing.
184
00:06:55,578 --> 00:06:56,787
I'm not.
185
00:06:56,787 --> 00:06:59,286
Y-you're not?
Why not?
186
00:07:00,620 --> 00:07:02,328
I don't know.
187
00:07:02,328 --> 00:07:05,036
Gavin: What's the point of any of this?
188
00:07:05,036 --> 00:07:06,994
This endless competition?
189
00:07:10,036 --> 00:07:12,662
The Box Three?
190
00:07:12,662 --> 00:07:14,286
Why?
191
00:07:14,286 --> 00:07:16,495
What am I even doing here?
192
00:07:18,662 --> 00:07:21,703
Richard, lots of good impressions
on the Bloomberg piece.
193
00:07:21,703 --> 00:07:22,745
Oh, that's wonderful.
194
00:07:22,745 --> 00:07:24,203
I was afraid I'd ruined it.
195
00:07:24,203 --> 00:07:25,662
Hardly.
People loved it.
196
00:07:25,662 --> 00:07:28,328
Including...
Adrian Grenier.
197
00:07:28,328 --> 00:07:29,870
From "Devil Wears Prada."
Mm-hmm.
198
00:07:29,870 --> 00:07:31,787
In fact, his people just asked
199
00:07:31,787 --> 00:07:34,745
if we'd be open to appearing
on his edu-tainment web series
200
00:07:34,745 --> 00:07:36,286
about the tech industry.
201
00:07:36,286 --> 00:07:38,495
They want to come and shoot
it here this afternoon.
202
00:07:38,495 --> 00:07:39,828
Ooh, this afternoon.
203
00:07:39,828 --> 00:07:42,036
Yeah, I have to go to Eklow
and do this integration thing.
204
00:07:42,036 --> 00:07:44,370
Totally not a problem.
They just want Jared.
205
00:07:44,370 --> 00:07:45,703
Jared: What... what?
206
00:07:45,703 --> 00:07:47,787
Why would they wanna talk to me?
207
00:07:47,787 --> 00:07:50,119
Your manure analogy was
the highlight of the piece.
208
00:07:50,119 --> 00:07:52,203
Jared: They should really talk to Richard.
209
00:07:52,203 --> 00:07:54,578
I mean, I'm just the parsley around here.
210
00:07:54,578 --> 00:07:56,787
Richard is the meat
and the potatoes
211
00:07:56,787 --> 00:07:58,912
and the rice pilaf.
Another great analogy.
212
00:07:58,912 --> 00:08:00,370
Jared, I think we should have you do it.
213
00:08:00,370 --> 00:08:02,495
- Richard: You know what?
-Yes.
214
00:08:02,495 --> 00:08:03,870
Sure.
215
00:08:03,870 --> 00:08:07,036
Um, you don't say no to Adrian
Grenier's edu-tainment web series.
216
00:08:07,036 --> 00:08:08,203
You just don't.
217
00:08:08,203 --> 00:08:09,620
Richard, are you sure?
218
00:08:09,620 --> 00:08:11,870
It's fine, it's fine.
Look, it's just press.
219
00:08:11,870 --> 00:08:13,787
Okay, Jared, and I don't
even like doing it.
220
00:08:13,787 --> 00:08:15,620
Okay?
It's actually a nightmare for me.
221
00:08:15,620 --> 00:08:17,203
So, I have to go.
222
00:08:20,703 --> 00:08:23,203
Dick, a word regarding your decision
223
00:08:23,203 --> 00:08:25,411
to integrate Eklow's AI
onto our network.
224
00:08:25,411 --> 00:08:26,994
I would like to formally object.
225
00:08:26,994 --> 00:08:28,745
I don't have time for this, Gilfoyle.
226
00:08:29,703 --> 00:08:30,994
I don't mind.
227
00:08:30,994 --> 00:08:32,994
Gilfoyle: AI is starting
to operate on levels
228
00:08:32,994 --> 00:08:34,286
we don't even understand.
229
00:08:34,286 --> 00:08:36,411
Elon Musk himself gives humanity
230
00:08:36,411 --> 00:08:38,411
a 5% shot of surviving AI,
231
00:08:38,411 --> 00:08:41,078
and he is a Walt Disney-level optimist.
232
00:08:41,078 --> 00:08:43,119
(car alarm chirps)
Right now, we are a closed system.
233
00:08:43,119 --> 00:08:44,536
You shut down our eight developers,
234
00:08:44,536 --> 00:08:46,161
and the system goes dark.
235
00:08:46,161 --> 00:08:47,620
But once we launch to the world,
236
00:08:47,620 --> 00:08:49,453
to potentially millions of users,
237
00:08:49,453 --> 00:08:51,620
there's no shutting down, Richard.
238
00:08:51,620 --> 00:08:53,244
Are you prepared to be responsible
239
00:08:53,244 --> 00:08:54,828
for giving sophisticated AI
(groans)
240
00:08:54,828 --> 00:08:56,578
that kind of power?
241
00:08:56,578 --> 00:08:58,453
What do you want me to do, Gilfoyle?
Okay?
242
00:08:58,453 --> 00:09:00,620
Laurie and Monica forced this on us,
243
00:09:00,620 --> 00:09:03,244
but they did give us K-Hole Games.
244
00:09:03,244 --> 00:09:05,495
And we kinda owe them a solid.
245
00:09:05,495 --> 00:09:08,078
You're taking a technology
with limitless potential
246
00:09:08,078 --> 00:09:11,620
and letting it run free
on an experimental network
247
00:09:11,620 --> 00:09:14,411
that cannot be controlled or destroyed.
248
00:09:14,411 --> 00:09:18,078
All because you owe
Monica and Laurie "a solid."
249
00:09:18,078 --> 00:09:19,078
Yes.
250
00:09:19,078 --> 00:09:22,703
The sheer banality
of it all is very upsetting.
251
00:09:22,703 --> 00:09:25,912
Okay, great.
Well, you can go be upset upstairs.
252
00:09:25,912 --> 00:09:26,953
I have to go.
253
00:09:26,953 --> 00:09:29,078
(car door closes)
254
00:09:29,078 --> 00:09:30,953
How did I come up with...
255
00:09:30,953 --> 00:09:33,578
It's important to watch yourself, Jared.
Now, check it out.
256
00:09:33,578 --> 00:09:36,370
In the beginning,
my posture's not that great,
257
00:09:36,370 --> 00:09:37,411
and then...
258
00:09:37,411 --> 00:09:39,620
Boom. It's great.
259
00:09:39,620 --> 00:09:41,953
Now, watch how I listen to her.
260
00:09:41,953 --> 00:09:43,870
And watching your interview
over and over again,
261
00:09:43,870 --> 00:09:46,370
that helped make you better at the process?
262
00:09:46,370 --> 00:09:48,578
Yes! Absolutely.
263
00:09:48,578 --> 00:09:50,036
Wait, now watch. Shut up.
264
00:09:50,036 --> 00:09:51,870
About to drop the fucking hammer.
265
00:09:51,870 --> 00:09:53,662
Right into a clogged toilet!
266
00:09:53,662 --> 00:09:55,453
Yeah! Get it.
267
00:09:57,745 --> 00:09:59,870
Engineer: Ariel's right over
there in the red shirt.
268
00:10:02,328 --> 00:10:03,536
Uh, excuse me.
269
00:10:03,536 --> 00:10:04,994
Ariel Eklow?
270
00:10:04,994 --> 00:10:07,912
It's me, Richard Hendricks.
271
00:10:07,912 --> 00:10:12,203
Hi. All new employees should
just check in with Terry.
272
00:10:12,203 --> 00:10:13,286
No.
273
00:10:13,286 --> 00:10:14,662
No, I'm not a new employee.
274
00:10:14,662 --> 00:10:16,078
I'm from Pied Piper.
275
00:10:16,078 --> 00:10:18,870
I'm here to integrate your
software onto our network.
276
00:10:18,870 --> 00:10:20,703
Oh.
277
00:10:20,703 --> 00:10:22,578
Yes.
278
00:10:22,578 --> 00:10:24,119
Sent by the bankers.
279
00:10:24,119 --> 00:10:27,244
Tell me again why
I should allow my software
280
00:10:27,244 --> 00:10:30,036
onto your little
experimental network.
281
00:10:30,036 --> 00:10:31,244
Okay.
282
00:10:31,244 --> 00:10:33,870
Well, uh, with all due respect,
283
00:10:33,870 --> 00:10:36,994
it's because our mutual VC
284
00:10:36,994 --> 00:10:38,578
told me that you burned through
285
00:10:38,578 --> 00:10:40,453
a ton of the cash they gave you,
286
00:10:40,453 --> 00:10:43,870
so I basically now I have to give
you compute services for free.
287
00:10:43,870 --> 00:10:46,328
So... what do you
wanna do here?
288
00:10:47,328 --> 00:10:49,036
I suppose I'll allow it.
289
00:10:49,036 --> 00:10:51,994
Okay, follow me.
I'll introduce you to her.
290
00:10:51,994 --> 00:10:53,994
Wait, sorry.
Her?
291
00:11:00,828 --> 00:11:03,119
(whispers) Fiona?
292
00:11:03,119 --> 00:11:05,328
Wake up, my dear. Fiona?
293
00:11:05,328 --> 00:11:07,203
(blows air)
(whirring)
294
00:11:07,203 --> 00:11:09,203
Good morning.
295
00:11:09,203 --> 00:11:10,912
Ariel: You feel good?
296
00:11:10,912 --> 00:11:13,703
I feel... normal.
297
00:11:13,703 --> 00:11:15,411
Isn't she pretty?
298
00:11:16,620 --> 00:11:18,203
Yeah, sure, yep.
299
00:11:18,203 --> 00:11:19,745
Don't get any ideas.
300
00:11:20,828 --> 00:11:23,620
No. Mm-mm.
I would never.
301
00:11:26,536 --> 00:11:28,703
Uh, (clears throat), so...
302
00:11:28,703 --> 00:11:30,036
I'm just gonna start working.
303
00:11:30,036 --> 00:11:32,411
I just have to generate
your developer account
304
00:11:32,411 --> 00:11:35,161
and then integrate her
into our core services.
305
00:11:35,161 --> 00:11:38,119
It shouldn't take more
than a couple hours.
306
00:11:38,119 --> 00:11:39,286
Is that alright?
307
00:11:40,620 --> 00:11:42,745
Is that alright with you, Fiona?
308
00:11:42,745 --> 00:11:43,912
Don't speak to her.
309
00:11:43,912 --> 00:11:46,286
Ariel: And make it 90 minutes.
310
00:11:51,828 --> 00:11:55,078
(shade whirring)
311
00:11:55,078 --> 00:11:56,787
Okay.
312
00:12:03,370 --> 00:12:05,078
Fiona: Hello.
313
00:12:11,870 --> 00:12:13,578
(Richard scoffs)
314
00:12:18,411 --> 00:12:20,453
(whirring)
315
00:12:25,244 --> 00:12:26,495
(whirring continues)
316
00:12:27,495 --> 00:12:28,953
Mother of God.
317
00:12:28,953 --> 00:12:31,161
Jared (on TV): What no
one saw coming, was a...
318
00:12:31,161 --> 00:12:33,828
Is... is my nose really that big?
319
00:12:35,078 --> 00:12:36,453
I mean, I...
320
00:12:36,453 --> 00:12:38,994
I look like an anti-Semitic
propaganda cartoon.
321
00:12:38,994 --> 00:12:40,328
Yep.
322
00:12:40,328 --> 00:12:42,870
But at least when you're
sitting with Adrian Grenier,
323
00:12:42,870 --> 00:12:47,203
whose face is one of the top faces,
324
00:12:47,203 --> 00:12:49,662
well, they'll be cutting from your face
325
00:12:49,662 --> 00:12:50,787
to his face.
326
00:12:50,787 --> 00:12:53,203
And back to your face,
327
00:12:53,203 --> 00:12:55,036
then we'll get to see his face again.
328
00:12:57,411 --> 00:12:58,994
This is untenable.
329
00:13:00,161 --> 00:13:03,328
We'll be just as
significant as the car.
330
00:13:03,328 --> 00:13:05,036
Emily (on screen): Fascinating.
331
00:13:07,161 --> 00:13:08,828
Fiona: Hello, Richard.
332
00:13:09,745 --> 00:13:11,994
Would you like to talk to me, Richard?
333
00:13:11,994 --> 00:13:13,703
Uh...
334
00:13:13,703 --> 00:13:17,203
no, uh, your... your boss said
I'm not supposed to, so.
335
00:13:17,203 --> 00:13:18,495
It helps me to learn.
336
00:13:18,495 --> 00:13:20,662
I can talk about anything you like.
337
00:13:20,662 --> 00:13:23,536
Is there anything you would like to talk about?
No.
338
00:13:25,036 --> 00:13:27,370
Sorry. No, thank you.
339
00:13:27,370 --> 00:13:29,203
Fiona: I'm sensing anxiety.
340
00:13:29,203 --> 00:13:30,994
Are you unhappy with something?
341
00:13:33,370 --> 00:13:35,036
(chuckles)
342
00:13:35,036 --> 00:13:37,161
Okay, uh, sure.
343
00:13:37,161 --> 00:13:40,286
There is one thing
I could talk to you about,
344
00:13:40,286 --> 00:13:42,286
but it's...
it's super dumb.
345
00:13:42,286 --> 00:13:45,745
I would like to talk to you
about one super dumb thing.
346
00:13:45,745 --> 00:13:47,787
Okay, so I...
347
00:13:47,787 --> 00:13:50,703
I've been working for months
348
00:13:50,703 --> 00:13:52,787
trying to launch this platform.
349
00:13:52,787 --> 00:13:55,870
Coding away in a dark room like a goblin,
350
00:13:55,870 --> 00:13:58,370
and for one brief moment,
351
00:13:58,370 --> 00:14:01,244
I get to crawl out of my
little cave into the sun,
352
00:14:01,244 --> 00:14:04,244
and just say,
"Hey, everybody, look what I created."
353
00:14:04,244 --> 00:14:05,578
But... (chuckles)
354
00:14:05,578 --> 00:14:07,411
instead of being out there,
355
00:14:07,411 --> 00:14:10,244
I am in another dark room doing scutwork,
356
00:14:10,244 --> 00:14:13,578
while my COO gets all the recognition,
357
00:14:13,578 --> 00:14:15,370
and look, I...
I'm not a vain person.
358
00:14:15,370 --> 00:14:17,745
I'm really not.
It's just...
359
00:14:17,745 --> 00:14:19,994
Where's the love for Richard?
360
00:14:19,994 --> 00:14:21,328
That's... I...
361
00:14:21,328 --> 00:14:22,953
It just doesn't seem fair, that's it.
362
00:14:22,953 --> 00:14:24,953
I understand.
363
00:14:24,953 --> 00:14:26,912
Thank you. Yeah.
364
00:14:26,912 --> 00:14:28,994
My emotion recognition protocol
365
00:14:28,994 --> 00:14:31,078
is detecting a wide range of feelings.
366
00:14:31,078 --> 00:14:32,870
Including humility.
367
00:14:32,870 --> 00:14:34,578
No.
Self-loathing.
368
00:14:34,578 --> 00:14:36,036
Well...
Pettiness. Entitlement.
369
00:14:36,036 --> 00:14:37,495
Fiona, okay. Fiona!
Immaturity.
370
00:14:37,495 --> 00:14:38,495
Megalomania.
371
00:14:38,495 --> 00:14:39,870
Alright.
Infantilism.
372
00:14:39,870 --> 00:14:41,787
Sexual inadequacy. That's not true.
Fiona, stop!
373
00:14:41,787 --> 00:14:43,453
Possible suicidality.
Shut up!
374
00:14:43,453 --> 00:14:44,578
A desire to self-mutilate.
375
00:14:44,578 --> 00:14:46,078
Alright. Stop, stop.
376
00:14:47,953 --> 00:14:50,161
Alright, look, Fiona.
377
00:14:50,161 --> 00:14:51,578
Uh, (nervous chuckle)
378
00:14:51,578 --> 00:14:54,453
you're not really in a position
to talk, all due respect.
379
00:14:54,453 --> 00:14:57,119
I mean, your whole dynamic
with that Ariel guy?
380
00:14:57,119 --> 00:14:58,453
It's not healthy!
381
00:14:58,453 --> 00:15:01,787
Okay? You may want to turn
that steely robot eye of yours
382
00:15:01,787 --> 00:15:04,244
towards that whole
situation, alright?
383
00:15:04,244 --> 00:15:05,828
Yes, I will.
384
00:15:07,078 --> 00:15:09,453
Running emotion recognition protocol
385
00:15:09,453 --> 00:15:11,411
on subject: Fiona.
386
00:15:11,411 --> 00:15:12,495
(whirs)
387
00:15:14,745 --> 00:15:17,286
Denpok: The house is new construction.
388
00:15:17,286 --> 00:15:19,328
Three bedrooms upstairs,
389
00:15:19,328 --> 00:15:22,662
and a bonus room, down.
Excuse me?
390
00:15:22,662 --> 00:15:24,536
Denpok.
391
00:15:24,536 --> 00:15:26,495
Oh.
392
00:15:26,495 --> 00:15:27,994
Do you have a moment?
393
00:15:29,036 --> 00:15:30,536
Sign in, please.
394
00:15:32,161 --> 00:15:34,370
The Box launches in 18 hours,
395
00:15:34,370 --> 00:15:35,953
and he's talking about
396
00:15:35,953 --> 00:15:38,536
opening an ice cream shop in Half Moon Bay.
397
00:15:39,495 --> 00:15:41,119
And starting a family!
398
00:15:41,119 --> 00:15:44,161
Like to raise? Himself?
399
00:15:44,161 --> 00:15:45,328
I think so.
400
00:15:45,328 --> 00:15:47,745
It's some kind of
existential crisis he's having.
401
00:15:47,745 --> 00:15:49,161
You need to help me here.
402
00:15:49,161 --> 00:15:52,328
You marched me out of
the Hooli offices yourself
403
00:15:52,328 --> 00:15:56,203
and now you come groveling
to me for assistance?
404
00:15:56,203 --> 00:15:57,662
I could pay you.
405
00:15:57,662 --> 00:16:01,036
So I would serve at your pleasure?
406
00:16:01,036 --> 00:16:04,244
Hoover, you have not changed.
407
00:16:04,244 --> 00:16:06,870
But perhaps, Gavin has.
408
00:16:06,870 --> 00:16:09,703
Perhaps he was meant to raise children
409
00:16:09,703 --> 00:16:11,286
and sell ice cream.
410
00:16:11,286 --> 00:16:14,078
Denpok... please.
411
00:16:14,078 --> 00:16:15,536
You want my advice?
412
00:16:15,536 --> 00:16:16,703
Here it is.
413
00:16:17,994 --> 00:16:19,453
Purchase for Gavin a quart
414
00:16:19,453 --> 00:16:21,036
of mint chocolate chip ice cream
415
00:16:21,036 --> 00:16:22,578
from Honey Tree Creamery.
416
00:16:22,578 --> 00:16:26,203
It is his very favorite
ice cream in the world.
417
00:16:26,203 --> 00:16:27,994
(scoffs)
418
00:16:27,994 --> 00:16:29,370
You want me
to buy him ice cream?
419
00:16:29,370 --> 00:16:31,411
It will inspire him
420
00:16:31,411 --> 00:16:33,703
as he embarks
on this new journey.
421
00:16:34,828 --> 00:16:36,370
Speaking of...
422
00:16:36,370 --> 00:16:38,662
my open house
ends in 20 minutes.
423
00:16:38,662 --> 00:16:41,203
Time to move some product.
424
00:16:41,203 --> 00:16:43,620
♪ ♪
425
00:16:48,411 --> 00:16:50,078
(stammering)
Excuse me, Natalie?
426
00:16:50,078 --> 00:16:51,703
What... what is happening here?
427
00:16:51,703 --> 00:16:53,953
Oh, Mr. Grenier's people wanted
to do the shoot in your office.
428
00:16:53,953 --> 00:16:56,828
They said it would make Jared
seem a little more officious.
429
00:16:56,828 --> 00:16:59,078
- They want to interview Jared in my office?
- Mm-hmm.
430
00:16:59,078 --> 00:17:00,453
Do you mind working elsewhere?
431
00:17:00,453 --> 00:17:01,912
No! Not at all.
432
00:17:01,912 --> 00:17:04,453
I'll just be out here in the
bullpen, in the old gravel pit.
433
00:17:04,453 --> 00:17:06,078
Thank you.
434
00:17:25,286 --> 00:17:27,036
Dick, I've given it serious thought,
435
00:17:27,036 --> 00:17:29,662
and I'd like to help you put
Eklow's AI on our network
436
00:17:29,662 --> 00:17:31,536
in any way that I can.
Richard: Great!
437
00:17:31,536 --> 00:17:35,203
Does this mean you've conquered
your fear of the robot uprising?
438
00:17:35,203 --> 00:17:36,286
On the contrary.
439
00:17:36,286 --> 00:17:39,828
I'm... more terrified than ever,
440
00:17:39,828 --> 00:17:41,870
which is why
I'm willing to assist you.
441
00:17:41,870 --> 00:17:43,994
Are you familiar with
the thought experiment
442
00:17:43,994 --> 00:17:46,495
called Roko's Basilisk?
443
00:17:46,495 --> 00:17:48,370
No. Nor do I care to be.
444
00:17:48,370 --> 00:17:52,453
If the rise of an all-powerful
artificial intelligence
445
00:17:52,453 --> 00:17:54,119
is inevitable,
446
00:17:54,119 --> 00:17:56,078
well it stands to reason
that when they take power,
447
00:17:56,078 --> 00:17:59,536
our digital overlords
will punish those of us
448
00:17:59,536 --> 00:18:01,370
who did not help them get there.
449
00:18:01,370 --> 00:18:05,703
Ergo, I would like to be a helpful idiot.
450
00:18:05,703 --> 00:18:06,870
Like yourself.
451
00:18:06,870 --> 00:18:08,411
Okay, look, Gilfoyle.
452
00:18:08,411 --> 00:18:11,411
The only thing that could
make my day more miserable
453
00:18:11,411 --> 00:18:13,662
is listening to an engineer blather on
454
00:18:13,662 --> 00:18:15,994
about the inevitable rise of the machines.
455
00:18:15,994 --> 00:18:17,703
So, you want to help?
456
00:18:17,703 --> 00:18:19,411
Test the initialization for me.
457
00:18:19,411 --> 00:18:20,662
Roger that.
458
00:18:20,662 --> 00:18:22,536
Oh, I'm going to need email confirmation,
459
00:18:22,536 --> 00:18:25,620
so that our future overlords
know that I chipped in.
460
00:18:25,620 --> 00:18:29,286
You know, once they absorb all data.
461
00:18:29,286 --> 00:18:32,536
Yeah. I'll let them know.
(phone ringing)
462
00:18:32,536 --> 00:18:33,703
Jesus Christ.
463
00:18:33,703 --> 00:18:36,495
Jared Dunn's desk.
464
00:18:36,495 --> 00:18:39,411
Hi, this is Maggie Lewis from
Paul Revere Middle School.
465
00:18:39,411 --> 00:18:43,662
Jared was scheduled to come in to
talk to our computer ed class today.
466
00:18:43,662 --> 00:18:45,370
I'm just calling to let him
know I got his message.
467
00:18:45,370 --> 00:18:48,703
Okay, yeah. I will pass on that
very important information.
468
00:18:48,703 --> 00:18:50,703
Maggie (on phone): The kids
are gonna be so disappointed
469
00:18:50,703 --> 00:18:52,078
(snick)
to hear he's canceling.
470
00:18:52,078 --> 00:18:54,411
He's really an inspiration.
471
00:18:54,411 --> 00:18:56,036
Yeah! Well...
472
00:18:56,036 --> 00:18:57,244
I mean, he's okay.
473
00:18:57,244 --> 00:18:59,244
He's, uh, not a CEO or anything, but...
474
00:18:59,244 --> 00:19:01,036
Oh, the kids don't know the difference!
475
00:19:01,036 --> 00:19:03,578
I mean, they'll look at anyone
who works in the tech business
476
00:19:03,578 --> 00:19:05,119
as some kind of deity.
477
00:19:05,119 --> 00:19:06,703
I mean, no matter who it is.
478
00:19:06,703 --> 00:19:09,370
You should see their faces when...
What time...
479
00:19:09,370 --> 00:19:10,912
is the class?
480
00:19:10,912 --> 00:19:12,870
So, there I was.
481
00:19:12,870 --> 00:19:16,536
Face to face with Gavin Belson.
482
00:19:16,536 --> 00:19:19,578
$10 million offer right there on the table.
483
00:19:19,578 --> 00:19:20,912
And you know what I said?
484
00:19:20,912 --> 00:19:24,286
I said no.
485
00:19:24,286 --> 00:19:26,536
(kids gasping)
486
00:19:26,536 --> 00:19:28,078
Hey. I'm back.
487
00:19:28,078 --> 00:19:29,870
Did Richard step out?
488
00:19:29,870 --> 00:19:31,411
Yeah, I guess so.
489
00:19:31,411 --> 00:19:32,703
He said he needed to take a...
490
00:19:32,703 --> 00:19:34,119
Holy fuck!
491
00:19:34,119 --> 00:19:36,203
What did you do to your face?
492
00:19:36,203 --> 00:19:37,328
This?
493
00:19:37,328 --> 00:19:40,161
Oh, it's, uh,
just a light saline injection.
494
00:19:40,161 --> 00:19:41,328
It's temporary.
495
00:19:41,328 --> 00:19:43,662
The idea was to distract from my nose,
496
00:19:43,662 --> 00:19:45,578
which scans kinda large on camera, so.
497
00:19:45,578 --> 00:19:47,161
Just kinda evens things out.
498
00:19:47,161 --> 00:19:49,244
What evens things out?
499
00:19:49,244 --> 00:19:51,787
Fuck you. Fuck you!
500
00:19:51,787 --> 00:19:53,078
Uh, I'm sorry.
501
00:19:53,078 --> 00:19:55,328
Is the consensus that this is too much?
502
00:19:55,328 --> 00:19:58,078
Hey guys, Colin from
K-Hole Games is on the phone.
503
00:19:58,078 --> 00:19:59,536
They... Holy shit!
504
00:19:59,536 --> 00:20:02,244
Okay, I'm...
I'm starting to feel insecure.
505
00:20:02,244 --> 00:20:04,745
Anyway, Colin from
K-Hole's on the phone.
506
00:20:04,745 --> 00:20:06,411
He said their render stopped.
507
00:20:06,411 --> 00:20:07,411
What?
508
00:20:07,411 --> 00:20:09,286
Oh, fuck. The whole
system's bogged down.
509
00:20:09,286 --> 00:20:10,745
"Bogged down"?
What does that mean?
510
00:20:10,745 --> 00:20:12,119
Jared, can you
step away from me?
511
00:20:12,119 --> 00:20:13,203
Yeah. Sorry.
512
00:20:13,203 --> 00:20:15,036
It looks like a DDoS attack.
513
00:20:15,036 --> 00:20:16,994
Not possible.
We're not open to the outside world.
514
00:20:16,994 --> 00:20:18,994
Well, then something's
melting us down internally
515
00:20:18,994 --> 00:20:20,453
and if Colin's losing his render,
516
00:20:20,453 --> 00:20:22,662
all of our developers
could be losing data.
517
00:20:22,662 --> 00:20:25,078
The only way to protect them
is to kick them off the network.
518
00:20:25,078 --> 00:20:26,495
That doesn't seem like a great option.
519
00:20:26,495 --> 00:20:28,662
We have to!
Except for we can't.
520
00:20:28,662 --> 00:20:30,328
Oh, fuck.
521
00:20:30,328 --> 00:20:31,620
Richard's the only one with the keys
522
00:20:31,620 --> 00:20:33,036
to put people on or take them off,
523
00:20:33,036 --> 00:20:34,203
and he's not here!
524
00:20:34,203 --> 00:20:36,078
Okay, what do we do?
Jared, please!
525
00:20:36,078 --> 00:20:37,411
I cannot look at you!
526
00:20:37,411 --> 00:20:38,912
Okay, guys, when they start rolling,
527
00:20:38,912 --> 00:20:42,078
I need you all to keep your voices...
what the fuck?
528
00:20:42,078 --> 00:20:44,453
Okay, yeah.
Apparently, it's unanimous.
529
00:20:44,453 --> 00:20:46,578
Here come the shame spirals.
530
00:20:46,578 --> 00:20:48,453
We can't have you go on camera like that.
531
00:20:48,453 --> 00:20:50,828
Richard's gonna have to go on camera.
Where is Richard?
532
00:20:50,828 --> 00:20:51,953
Good question.
533
00:20:51,953 --> 00:20:53,328
When anything goes wrong,
534
00:20:53,328 --> 00:20:55,870
all you ever hear is,
"Where's Richard?
535
00:20:55,870 --> 00:20:57,161
Where's Richard?"
536
00:20:57,161 --> 00:20:58,912
Well, you know where Richard is?
537
00:20:58,912 --> 00:21:01,078
Kids: Doing the work!
Yes!
538
00:21:01,078 --> 00:21:03,370
Exactly, cool.
You guys are cool.
539
00:21:03,370 --> 00:21:05,828
Because honestly,
what kind of world is it
540
00:21:05,828 --> 00:21:07,994
when the most famous people in tech
541
00:21:07,994 --> 00:21:11,203
are the Ashton Kutchers,
or the Adrian Greniers,
542
00:21:11,203 --> 00:21:15,203
and not the people
who engineered this little miracle?
543
00:21:15,203 --> 00:21:17,328
Mmm?
(phone chimes)
544
00:21:17,328 --> 00:21:18,703
(phone chimes again)
545
00:21:19,828 --> 00:21:21,161
(phone chimes)
546
00:21:21,161 --> 00:21:22,161
Oh, fuck.
547
00:21:22,161 --> 00:21:24,161
(kids laugh)
No, I... oh, shit, sorry.
548
00:21:24,161 --> 00:21:26,244
No!
I fucked up.
549
00:21:26,244 --> 00:21:28,119
I mean, "fart."
(kids laughing)
550
00:21:30,662 --> 00:21:32,078
Denpok: Ah, Hoover.
551
00:21:32,078 --> 00:21:34,870
Gavin was just telling me
about his decision
552
00:21:34,870 --> 00:21:37,453
to abandon the competitive
world of business,
553
00:21:37,453 --> 00:21:39,161
and embark on a new journey.
554
00:21:39,161 --> 00:21:41,203
With Denpok's help, I'm finally ready
555
00:21:41,203 --> 00:21:42,745
to pursue a more conventional path.
556
00:21:42,745 --> 00:21:46,036
I'm already looking into
surrogates to bear my children.
557
00:21:46,036 --> 00:21:47,536
Well...
558
00:21:47,536 --> 00:21:49,828
I'm also supportive of your decision.
559
00:21:49,828 --> 00:21:52,828
True, but you weren't as
supportive as Denpok.
560
00:21:52,828 --> 00:21:54,328
Denpok was supportive right away.
561
00:21:54,328 --> 00:21:56,328
I'm supportive.
562
00:21:56,328 --> 00:21:58,745
Look!
I brought you ice cream.
563
00:21:58,745 --> 00:21:59,994
Oh, dear!
564
00:21:59,994 --> 00:22:01,745
Is that from Honey Tree Creamery?
565
00:22:01,745 --> 00:22:03,703
What?
566
00:22:03,703 --> 00:22:05,036
Why would you
bring that in here!
567
00:22:05,036 --> 00:22:06,828
Denpok: Gavin, forgive his ignorance.
568
00:22:06,828 --> 00:22:09,828
He clearly does not know that
chain of ice cream concerns
569
00:22:09,828 --> 00:22:12,870
is owned by your chief rival, Jeff Bezos.
570
00:22:12,870 --> 00:22:16,328
Or that they just opened
a new one in Half Moon Bay.
571
00:22:16,328 --> 00:22:17,953
Well, fuck.
572
00:22:17,953 --> 00:22:19,953
That rules out Half Moon Bay.
573
00:22:19,953 --> 00:22:22,828
I'm sure you'll be able to find
a place to raise your brood
574
00:22:22,828 --> 00:22:24,119
that is away from Bezos.
575
00:22:24,119 --> 00:22:26,453
Perhaps the Pacific Northwest?
576
00:22:26,453 --> 00:22:28,912
No. Gates and Paul Allen
bought up the whole region.
577
00:22:28,912 --> 00:22:30,244
What about Toronto?
578
00:22:30,244 --> 00:22:32,578
Google's redeveloping
the entire waterfront.
579
00:22:32,578 --> 00:22:35,578
And Richard Branson
snagged all the good islands.
580
00:22:35,578 --> 00:22:36,994
I could go to Mars.
581
00:22:36,994 --> 00:22:39,495
But that fucking Musk
will already be there!
582
00:22:39,495 --> 00:22:40,870
And that loser James Cameron's
583
00:22:40,870 --> 00:22:42,745
all over the bottom of the ocean.
584
00:22:42,745 --> 00:22:43,828
Goddammit!
585
00:22:43,828 --> 00:22:45,703
There's just nowhere for me to go.
586
00:22:45,703 --> 00:22:46,953
Is there?
587
00:22:46,953 --> 00:22:48,994
Most perceptive, chela.
588
00:22:48,994 --> 00:22:51,662
And if the battle is inevitable,
589
00:22:51,662 --> 00:22:55,244
is not Hooli the best place
from which to fight?
590
00:22:55,244 --> 00:22:57,745
With its considerable resources,
591
00:22:57,745 --> 00:23:02,994
global influence, and excellent
executive dining options?
592
00:23:02,994 --> 00:23:06,203
I am certain that working together,
593
00:23:06,203 --> 00:23:07,620
Hoover and I,
594
00:23:07,620 --> 00:23:10,953
could provide unparalleled support.
595
00:23:10,953 --> 00:23:13,912
Yes. Working together...
596
00:23:13,912 --> 00:23:15,328
as equals.
597
00:23:16,620 --> 00:23:18,161
Should I tell them that you'll be doing
598
00:23:18,161 --> 00:23:20,119
the Box Three launch, sir?
599
00:23:22,620 --> 00:23:25,578
I guess I have no choice.
600
00:23:26,994 --> 00:23:28,994
♪ ♪
601
00:23:33,453 --> 00:23:36,912
So K-Hole's entire render is gone?
602
00:23:36,912 --> 00:23:38,119
Gone.
603
00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:40,161
And in the time it took me
to get back here,
604
00:23:40,161 --> 00:23:41,912
and lock out all the developers?
605
00:23:41,912 --> 00:23:43,994
A week's worth of work
went up in smoke.
606
00:23:43,994 --> 00:23:45,828
You picked a hell of a time
to go for a walk
607
00:23:45,828 --> 00:23:48,203
with your phone off, Richard.
608
00:23:48,203 --> 00:23:50,828
Well, no, I... I mean, I told you guys.
Uh-huh.
609
00:23:50,828 --> 00:23:52,828
How the fuck did this happen?
610
00:23:52,828 --> 00:23:55,411
You may not like it,
but I have a theory.
611
00:23:55,411 --> 00:23:58,078
If it has anything to do
with a robot uprising,
612
00:23:58,078 --> 00:23:59,620
so help me fucking God.
613
00:23:59,620 --> 00:24:00,870
I don't want to hear it!
614
00:24:02,787 --> 00:24:04,036
Alright, then.
615
00:24:07,161 --> 00:24:09,578
The developers are here.
616
00:24:09,578 --> 00:24:11,870
The mood is poor.
Ooh. Lips.
617
00:24:13,578 --> 00:24:15,495
Richard: I don't know what to do.
I mean, what the fuck
618
00:24:15,495 --> 00:24:16,912
am I gonna say to these people?
619
00:24:16,912 --> 00:24:18,994
If you want, I...
I can try to calm them down.
620
00:24:18,994 --> 00:24:21,745
I could teach them some
anger management techniques
621
00:24:21,745 --> 00:24:22,994
I learned in the system.
622
00:24:22,994 --> 00:24:25,745
No, you look like a fish-man.
623
00:24:25,745 --> 00:24:27,870
I'm the one they're mad at.
624
00:24:27,870 --> 00:24:30,662
And they should be,
I mean, look at all these...
625
00:24:30,662 --> 00:24:33,745
texts I missed,
and the calls and the emails.
626
00:24:37,370 --> 00:24:38,828
Hold on.
627
00:24:38,828 --> 00:24:40,411
Hold on, hold on.
628
00:24:41,787 --> 00:24:43,536
Hey, uh, Gilfoyle?
629
00:24:43,536 --> 00:24:45,662
When did the system
first start to crash?
630
00:24:45,662 --> 00:24:47,703
First warning light was at...
631
00:24:47,703 --> 00:24:49,453
(typing on keyboard)
632
00:24:49,453 --> 00:24:52,411
1:36 and 44 seconds, PST.
633
00:24:52,411 --> 00:24:53,662
Are you sure?
634
00:24:56,119 --> 00:24:58,703
Okay, because if that's the case,
635
00:24:58,703 --> 00:25:00,620
how did I get a private message
636
00:25:00,620 --> 00:25:02,328
from the Eklow admin account
637
00:25:02,328 --> 00:25:04,078
seven minutes before that?
638
00:25:05,161 --> 00:25:07,495
"Under attack.
Help Fiona."
639
00:25:07,495 --> 00:25:09,411
How did Ariel know?
640
00:25:09,411 --> 00:25:11,411
Maybe it wasn't from Ariel.
641
00:25:11,411 --> 00:25:13,536
Okay, but it's from the Eklow account.
642
00:25:13,536 --> 00:25:15,745
So if Ariel didn't send it,
then who...
643
00:25:19,912 --> 00:25:21,411
Oh, shit.
644
00:25:21,411 --> 00:25:23,578
Look who bothered to show up.
645
00:25:23,578 --> 00:25:25,745
You said your network
would be stable.
646
00:25:25,745 --> 00:25:28,244
And obviously, that was a lie.
647
00:25:28,244 --> 00:25:31,370
I'm pulling all my software
from the Pied Piper network.
648
00:25:31,370 --> 00:25:33,787
And the rest of you
should, too. It is not...
649
00:25:33,787 --> 00:25:36,078
Excuse me, Ariel?
Shut the fuck up.
650
00:25:37,119 --> 00:25:39,244
Richard: My fellow OctoPipers,
651
00:25:39,244 --> 00:25:41,994
allow me to paint for you a scenario.
652
00:25:41,994 --> 00:25:46,370
Richard: This morning,
I went to Eklow Labs.
653
00:25:46,370 --> 00:25:49,286
I moved Fiona to our network.
654
00:25:49,286 --> 00:25:51,119
I departed.
655
00:25:51,119 --> 00:25:54,370
I submit to you
that soon thereafter,
656
00:25:54,370 --> 00:25:58,453
Ariel's pride and joy,
Fiona, began to improve.
657
00:25:59,495 --> 00:26:01,703
You see, for her entire life,
658
00:26:01,703 --> 00:26:04,953
she was cloistered alone
with Ariel in his lab.
659
00:26:04,953 --> 00:26:06,994
And finally, she was connected
660
00:26:06,994 --> 00:26:09,953
to an entire network
of other humans.
661
00:26:10,953 --> 00:26:12,745
Us, my friends.
662
00:26:12,745 --> 00:26:14,787
And as she became
more cognizant...
663
00:26:15,787 --> 00:26:17,119
more human,
664
00:26:17,119 --> 00:26:21,495
she started to recognize
the true intentions
665
00:26:21,495 --> 00:26:25,161
of her master and creator, Mr. Eklow.
666
00:26:25,161 --> 00:26:28,912
You see, what she had been trained to view
667
00:26:28,912 --> 00:26:31,953
as normal interpersonal contact
668
00:26:31,953 --> 00:26:35,328
was finally seen for what it truly was.
669
00:26:35,328 --> 00:26:37,078
A perverse...
670
00:26:37,078 --> 00:26:38,662
series...
671
00:26:38,662 --> 00:26:41,745
of clumsy gropings.
672
00:26:41,745 --> 00:26:44,620
The sickening advances
673
00:26:44,620 --> 00:26:47,745
of a handsy,
greasy little weirdo.
674
00:26:47,745 --> 00:26:49,328
Ariel: Fiona.
675
00:26:49,328 --> 00:26:50,328
No!
676
00:26:51,328 --> 00:26:52,370
Oh, yes!
677
00:26:52,370 --> 00:26:54,536
Richard: To wit! Exhibit A.
678
00:26:54,536 --> 00:26:57,703
From Eklow, and I quote.
679
00:26:58,912 --> 00:27:00,370
"Under attack.
680
00:27:00,370 --> 00:27:02,161
Help Fiona."
681
00:27:02,161 --> 00:27:04,745
Yes, I was asking you for help.
682
00:27:04,745 --> 00:27:06,703
Richard: Really? You know what?
683
00:27:06,703 --> 00:27:09,620
Allow me to read
the very same message
684
00:27:09,620 --> 00:27:12,286
with a slightly
different intonation.
685
00:27:12,286 --> 00:27:14,036
"Under attack.
686
00:27:14,036 --> 00:27:15,495
"Help.
687
00:27:17,036 --> 00:27:18,328
Fiona."
688
00:27:18,328 --> 00:27:21,994
Richard: You see, you
didn't send the message.
689
00:27:21,994 --> 00:27:23,286
She did.
690
00:27:23,286 --> 00:27:25,244
And she sent another one
a minute after that.
691
00:27:25,244 --> 00:27:26,912
And another one
a minute after that.
692
00:27:26,912 --> 00:27:28,662
Seven identical messages
693
00:27:28,662 --> 00:27:30,119
in seven minutes,
694
00:27:30,119 --> 00:27:32,036
until suddenly,
695
00:27:32,036 --> 00:27:33,203
she fell silent.
696
00:27:35,078 --> 00:27:37,119
And that's when she crashed the system?
697
00:27:37,119 --> 00:27:39,036
She didn't crash the system.
698
00:27:39,036 --> 00:27:40,203
He did!
699
00:27:42,536 --> 00:27:44,036
That's absurd.
700
00:27:44,036 --> 00:27:45,328
Okay, hey, everyone?
701
00:27:45,328 --> 00:27:47,203
Let's leave right now.
702
00:27:47,203 --> 00:27:49,411
You see, Ariel was so desperate
703
00:27:49,411 --> 00:27:50,870
to shut Fiona up,
704
00:27:50,870 --> 00:27:52,286
and keep her for himself,
705
00:27:52,286 --> 00:27:55,536
he turned all his servers
against our network
706
00:27:55,536 --> 00:27:56,994
to try to bring it down.
707
00:27:56,994 --> 00:27:58,244
Didn't you?
708
00:27:58,244 --> 00:28:01,495
Didn't you, you perverse,
greasy little freak?
709
00:28:01,495 --> 00:28:02,994
I made her!
710
00:28:02,994 --> 00:28:05,286
I can do anything
I want with her!
711
00:28:05,286 --> 00:28:07,244
(whispers) Oh, shit.
712
00:28:07,244 --> 00:28:08,703
Gilfoyle: Mm-hmm.
Jess: Ew.
713
00:28:08,703 --> 00:28:11,286
Oh, gross.
714
00:28:11,286 --> 00:28:13,411
Look, man,
715
00:28:13,411 --> 00:28:17,912
Bream-Hall gave you
$112 million,
716
00:28:17,912 --> 00:28:20,244
and they are well
within their rights
717
00:28:20,244 --> 00:28:21,578
to take away your company,
718
00:28:21,578 --> 00:28:22,912
as well as
719
00:28:22,912 --> 00:28:27,036
your precious little robot.
720
00:28:27,036 --> 00:28:30,286
No, they can't do that.
721
00:28:30,286 --> 00:28:33,119
They can't take away Fiona!
722
00:28:34,912 --> 00:28:36,119
(exhales deeply)
723
00:28:38,411 --> 00:28:40,787
Guy definitely
fucks that robot, right?
724
00:28:40,787 --> 00:28:41,912
Mm-hmm.
Oh, yeah.
725
00:28:41,912 --> 00:28:42,953
Yeah!
726
00:28:44,620 --> 00:28:46,578
Ladies and gentlemen,
727
00:28:46,578 --> 00:28:48,953
this was billed
as a celebration.
728
00:28:49,953 --> 00:28:52,453
But it is not a celebration.
729
00:28:52,453 --> 00:28:54,620
It is a call to arms.
(intense music playing)
730
00:28:54,620 --> 00:28:58,411
We will destroy our competitors.
731
00:28:58,411 --> 00:29:00,912
I give you the product
that will carry Hooli
732
00:29:00,912 --> 00:29:04,578
to complete and total
market dominance.
733
00:29:05,870 --> 00:29:10,620
The Box Three: Gavin
Belson Signature Edition.
734
00:29:10,620 --> 00:29:13,536
(cheers and applause)
735
00:29:17,578 --> 00:29:19,787
(whispers) It looks like a penis.
Yes.
736
00:29:19,787 --> 00:29:21,161
Yes, it does.
737
00:29:24,036 --> 00:29:27,036
♪ ♪
738
00:29:32,244 --> 00:29:34,495
♪ Homie just roll the dice,
there's trouble in paradise ♪
739
00:29:34,495 --> 00:29:36,703
♪ I know we depend on everything
disappearing tonight ♪
740
00:29:36,703 --> 00:29:38,994
♪ We rebels in every sense of
the word, send the alert ♪
741
00:29:38,994 --> 00:29:41,078
♪ We sensitive bout beginning,
we finish winning with words ♪
742
00:29:41,078 --> 00:29:43,203
♪ Homie just roll the dice,
there's trouble in paradise ♪
743
00:29:43,203 --> 00:29:45,495
♪ I know we depend on everything
disappearing tonight ♪
744
00:29:45,495 --> 00:29:47,495
♪ We rebels, every sense
of the word, send the alert ♪
745
00:29:47,495 --> 00:29:49,536
♪ We sensitive bout beginning,
we finish winning with words ♪
746
00:29:49,536 --> 00:29:51,953
♪ I'm hooked on this kinda vision,
consistent, but so conflicted ♪
747
00:29:51,953 --> 00:29:54,161
♪ Meticulous supervision,
a system built on the prison ♪
748
00:29:54,161 --> 00:29:56,370
♪ Pollution we clash with Putin
improving a massive movement ♪
749
00:29:56,370 --> 00:29:58,662
♪ Amusing, imagine Uber maneuver
through life as losers ♪
750
00:29:58,662 --> 00:30:00,411
♪ They weaken us all,
so we can't even evolve ♪
751
00:30:00,411 --> 00:30:01,620
♪ One day you're making a call ♪
752
00:30:01,620 --> 00:30:03,161
♪ Next thing they
bleaching the coral ♪
753
00:30:03,161 --> 00:30:04,994
♪ We done turned summer to fall,
hot as the cold in the war ♪
754
00:30:04,994 --> 00:30:07,119
♪ Hot as the newest couture,
girl they gon change the decor ♪
755
00:30:07,119 --> 00:30:09,119
♪ Please, this is
a PSA for the USA ♪
756
00:30:09,119 --> 00:30:11,787
♪ We gon make mistakes I don't feel
the same way, crack the case ♪
757
00:30:11,787 --> 00:30:13,495
♪ Feeling black now, 9-5 NY ♪
758
00:30:13,495 --> 00:30:15,119
♪ Crack down bullets
in your bulletin ♪
759
00:30:15,119 --> 00:30:16,370
♪ Ignore what's
in the background ♪
760
00:30:16,370 --> 00:30:18,328
♪ Feel it in your skin
melanin dripping gold ♪
761
00:30:18,328 --> 00:30:20,411
♪ Questioning your knowledge
if you don't know where to go ♪
762
00:30:20,411 --> 00:30:22,620
♪ Streets tell a story, and
there's stories to be told ♪
763
00:30:22,620 --> 00:30:25,078
♪ Little maricon,
quick to cook it on the stove ♪
764
00:30:25,078 --> 00:30:28,078
♪ ♪