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DINESH: So, as you can see,
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since I became CEO,
our user growth, undeniable,
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our retention, so sticky,
it's pornographic.
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We're lean, we're exploding.
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And we're more mission-focused than ever
in providing the best video chat
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the world has ever seen.
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Wow. Well, this seems
really promising, gentlemen.
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Promising, indeed.
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- I think if We just...
- "Promising"? (CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
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You're a young associate here,
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so, I'm gonna help you out, okay?
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We have a lot of these meetings set up.
We will be fine.
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What he means by that is...
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But you, you don't wanna be known around
here as the guy who fucked this up, okay?
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So, when you hip your bosses to our numbers
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and they get visible hard-ons,
have them move quickly.
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Erlich, you're with me.
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- It's "hards-on."
- What?
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"Hards-on," not "hard-ons."
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It's a syntactical error
that I could have remedied
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if you'd just given me the space to speak.
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Erlich. I'm seeing you Thursday, right?
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You better believe it. I can't wait for it.
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- For...
- For Jian-Yang's pitch.
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His new idea sounds super exciting.
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Yes, well, he is white-hot right now, and
that's why I had him reach out directly,
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and we can't wait to pitch you the idea
that is gonna be pitched to you.
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Great. I'll see you then.
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- You have no idea what it is, do you?
- Not a fucking clue.
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(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
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(MUSIC PLAYING ON HEADPHONES)
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MEN: (CHANTING)
Always blue! Always blue! Always blue!
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- Always blue! Always blue!
- (COMPUTER CHIMING)
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Always blue. Always blue. Always blue...
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- Hey.
- Always...
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Richard? Hey.
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What's... There you are. What's going on?
You celebrating something?
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We were just chanting.
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00:02:14,440 --> 00:02:18,001
- Why? What, the pitches go well?
- They went fine, you could say.
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You said they went awesome.
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All right. Thank you, Big Head.
I mean, I did get us a few offers.
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We did receive more than a few offers,
as few often refers to "three".
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And today, we're four for four.
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(CHUCKLES)
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Huh.
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- Which... I mean, what does that even mean?
- Nothing. Nothing at all.
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(CHUCKLES) Look,
you don't have to do this, really.
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It was my choice to leave the company,
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and besides, my lnternet thing is going
great. Really, it's going very well.
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So, lwant you to succeed,
and I want you guys to be happy.
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Sure you do, slugger.
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(SIGHS) Stop. Really.
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- It's cool. I mean that totally honestly.
- Keep it positive.
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Um, I should go skype my dad, I think,
and tell him the good news.
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Um, it is good news, though, right?
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'Cause we were all sort of,
like, happy and celebrating, but now...
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Now, it feels sort of weird...
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- Let's go, Big Head.
- Okay.
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- It's good?
- Yes.
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All right, well, enjoy. Carry on.
Always blue. (CHUCKLES)
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- Jared.
- Okay.
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- Always blue. Always blue...
- RICHARD: Sorry.
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Dinesh, lthink
you accidentally disabled my access keys
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for the video chat data repository.
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No, actually, I deleted them on purpose.
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I've purged all our ex-employees'.
Gleb, Sanjay, Elisabet, you...
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Gleb? What, you're comparing me to Gleb?
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When we agreed to split the company,
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we said that you could take
the algorithm for your video chat,
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and I could use
the data flowing through the system
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to optimize the algorithm for my thing.
We had a deal.
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We had an agreement, not
technically a deal.
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What the fuck, Dinesh?
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Play, play. Blue, blue.
Always blue, always blue.
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Have fun, you're having a party.
You got pizza and everything.
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Always blue...
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So, what, I should've got it
in writing, Dinesh? ls that it?
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You wanna lawyer-up now?
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You know, we're just some guys in a house.
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But I don't wanna be
just guys in a house, Richard.
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That's the whole point.
I want PiperChat to be a real company.
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And after all the bullshit we went through,
no offense,
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I finally got some real financing
lined up for us.
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I cannot have another
lntersite on my hands.
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That was fucking Russ
and his shitty tequila.
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You know that, man. You were there.
That wasn't me.
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Richard, it happened on your watch.
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I'm sorry. I really am.
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But the answer is no.
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Okay. Well, suck a dick.
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I'm sorry. What did you say?
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- Nice blazer.
- Thank you.
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- Where'd you get it?
- DINESH: Does it matter?
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Ijust wanna know where I can get one,
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so I can look like a
total fucking douchebag.
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Wow, right?
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Unbelievable.
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Gents, why don't we take
this party outside?
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Yes. We live in California,
we should take advantage of it.
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Gavin, you told me to interrupt
if Jack Barker came to see you. I'm sorry.
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Yes. Send him in. I thought Barker
would crack after one day in that basement.
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The fact that it's taken him two weeks
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to fess up about hijacking my fucking plane
and resign,
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will make it all the sweeter.
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Hiya, Skipper. Sorry to barge in.
I owe you an apology.
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Really? Whatever for?
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When you stuck me in that basement,
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I was like,
"Jack, what the hell did you do wrong?"
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And I'm sorry that it took me so long
to get it through my thick skull.
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I finally figured out
what this was all about.
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Well, I'm glad to hear it.
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You are doing exactly
what Bobby lger does over at Disney.
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What?
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He makes every manager spend
one day of the year in the Goofy suit.
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Because sometimes,
you just gotta be at product level
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to be able to see the best path forward.
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And once I realized that, it was like,
ka-pow! "lt was so obvious."
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It's the algorithm.
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Pied Piper put middle-out in their vid
chat, and it's amazing now. I know.
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I'm on that all the time with my grandkids.
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We could use middle-out
to revamp our entire suite of products.
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We can make billions, Chief.
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I'm whipping up some proposals right now
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that are gonna knock that wig
right off your head.
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Yeah.
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What the fuck is he up to?
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Look like a fucking wig to you?
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The point is, Jian-Yang,
you don't set pitches.
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I handle the scheduling,
that's the symbiosis of our relationship.
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00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:01,326
- No.
- What do you mean, "No?"
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No.
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Jian-Yang, PiperChat has
some real heat, okay?
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And we can draft off of that,
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but it has to be
a carefully choreographed dance.
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You can't just wiggle your little tush
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and expect every VC in the Valley
to get hards-on.
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I am your lead investor,
you will respect me as such.
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I do not respect you.
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You're not any kind of investor.
You own nothing.
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I own 10%. You live in my incubator.
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- No, you evict me, I evict your 10%.
- What are you talking about?
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"Santa Clara Sheriff's Department.
Vacate or be forcibly removed."
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To be fair, Jian-Yang, I filed this when I had
no expectation that the system would work.
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- Okay.
- Jian-Yang, just tell me...
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Can you just tell me what the idea is,
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so I can gauge
how aggressively I should pursue it?
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Hey, Jared, you were there, right?
When we split the company into two,
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- Dinesh and I had a very...
- No, no. Stop, stop. Please stop, Richard.
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- What?
- What are you doing?
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What do you mean?
I'm complaining about Dinesh. He sucks.
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00:08:02,240 --> 00:08:06,325
- He's my boss now, Richard.
- Well, your boss is being a real prick.
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Richard, we have to
bifurcate our relationship.
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You and I can no longer discuss business.
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All right? We can talk about anything else
two guys might talk about.
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We can talk about
sports teams and their scores, or pussy.
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But you and I cannot,
and will not discuss business.
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(SIGHS)
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Hey, man. For what it's worth, lthought
it was super fucked up, what Dinesh did.
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I know what it's like to be the one guy
not in the company, you know?
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So,
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if you want my login, it's all yours.
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Really?
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- Yeah, man.
- Thanks.
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(SIGHS) You know, I shouldn't do this.
Dinesh said no.
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- And also, these are Skyrim cheat codes.
- Oh, shit. Yeah.
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DINESH: My Bloomberg interview is on!
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"How did I come up with PiperChat?"
That's a very good question.
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I guess the tech gods
were just speaking through me.
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Somehow, Iknew to take
the best parts of the service
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as substandard and crappy as HooliChat,
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and make it... (INHALES SHARPLY)
How do I put this?
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Incredible.
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Do you think
I have too much product on my hair?
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00:09:21,840 --> 00:09:24,161
Nope. I think you should use more.
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Wait, are you saying that
because you think I look ridiculous
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and you want me to look
more ridiculous next time?
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Which answer will get
more of that stuff in your hair?
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Wait, wait, wait, watch this.
This is where I make Emily Chang laugh.
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Quite a turnaround for a company
that wasn't exactly soaring.
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Oh, it was soaring, Emily.
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Right into a clogged toilet.
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00:09:44,120 --> 00:09:46,016
- And not just like a standard clogged toilet.
- (LAUGHS)
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00:09:46,040 --> 00:09:50,090
Like, I don't need a plunger,
I need a shovel and a bucket.
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But enough about the previous leadership,
which was inept, lame, bitter...
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Fuck it. We had a deal.
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Thanks.
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00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:12,084
(MOUSE CLICKING)
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That's weird.
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00:10:13,840 --> 00:10:14,841
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
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00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:20,244
Hey, Richard. Have you seen the new
Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition?
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00:10:20,440 --> 00:10:24,809
The cover model has the most lovely,
enigmatic facial expression.
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00:10:24,920 --> 00:10:27,048
Jared, I don't really wanna
talk about guy talk.
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00:10:27,120 --> 00:10:30,329
I'm here to tell you that I think
Dinesh may be in some serious trouble.
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00:10:30,440 --> 00:10:33,011
Okay, so, I was analyzing a
bunch of user data, and I...
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00:10:33,080 --> 00:10:35,560
No, no, no. Richard, Richard.
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00:10:35,640 --> 00:10:38,962
I told you, I can't talk about this.
You have to bifurcate.
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00:10:39,040 --> 00:10:40,896
No, Jared, listen,
you're gonna wanna hear this...
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00:10:40,920 --> 00:10:43,241
Wait. What do you mean
you were looking at user data?
199
00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:47,287
You violated our system?
Richard, you were inside us?
200
00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:49,846
Don't tell Dinesh,
and don't tell any of the other guys, okay?
201
00:10:49,960 --> 00:10:53,362
"Don't tell Dinesh?"
Richard, Dinesh is my CEO.
202
00:10:53,440 --> 00:10:55,488
- Oh, God.
- What are you doing to me?
203
00:10:55,560 --> 00:10:58,166
- Did I make you angry?
- No. (GROANS)
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00:10:58,240 --> 00:11:00,376
I'm trying to save his ass, okay?
I'm trying to save you.
205
00:11:00,400 --> 00:11:03,324
Just survey the users.
206
00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:06,324
And make sure you ask
how old they are, okay?
207
00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:09,927
And then, that's it. That's it. That's it.
No more.
208
00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:11,240
(DOOR CLOSES)
209
00:11:11,840 --> 00:11:15,765
Stupid fucking Jian-Yang and his shitty
app. I don't even know if it is shitty.
210
00:11:16,040 --> 00:11:18,566
You know, I could probably
find out about Jian-Yang's app.
211
00:11:18,640 --> 00:11:21,530
He asked if he could
practice-pitch it to me.
212
00:11:21,600 --> 00:11:23,364
- Do you have any nines?
- Go fish.
213
00:11:23,440 --> 00:11:25,841
Wait, this could be great.
What time are you guys doing that?
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00:11:25,920 --> 00:11:27,160
I could listen in.
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00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:31,165
I don't know. He asked if he could
pitch me, and I said, "Sure,"
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00:11:31,240 --> 00:11:33,402
and then he just kept talking for a while.
217
00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:35,001
Oh.
218
00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:38,923
You don't think
that could have been the pitch, do you?
219
00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:43,210
- God damn it, what did he say?
- Jeez, I kind of zoned out.
220
00:11:43,320 --> 00:11:44,685
Shit. Fives?
221
00:11:45,240 --> 00:11:48,528
Uh, go fish. Wait.
222
00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:49,936
I don't know if this would be relevant,
223
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:52,566
but he did say the word "Oculus"
a whole bunch.
224
00:11:52,880 --> 00:11:54,962
- Wait. "Oculus"?
- Mmm-hmm.
225
00:11:56,120 --> 00:11:59,920
Oh, my God. It's a VR play.
226
00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:02,401
That's the frothiest space
in the Valley right now.
227
00:12:02,520 --> 00:12:04,727
Nobody understands it,
but everybody wants in.
228
00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:07,167
Any idiot can walk into a fucking room,
229
00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:11,126
utter the letters "V" and
and VCs will hurl bricks of cash at them.
230
00:12:11,200 --> 00:12:15,569
Then, by the time they find out
that it's vaporware, it's too late.
231
00:12:15,640 --> 00:12:18,484
I have got to get in on this.
232
00:12:24,360 --> 00:12:28,160
Trust me. Just give me five minutes.
There he is.
233
00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:31,050
Wait, is that our lawyer?
234
00:12:31,120 --> 00:12:32,121
Hey!
235
00:12:32,200 --> 00:12:34,441
I thought he was in jail.
236
00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:36,648
Hey. Perfect timing.
237
00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:40,845
Ijust completed the detailing on this Kia.
Come on.
238
00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:42,889
What the fuck is going on?
239
00:12:43,320 --> 00:12:44,320
Wait, I don't understand.
240
00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:46,283
How did Richard have access
to our user data?
241
00:12:46,360 --> 00:12:51,127
Someone must have let him in. lt was you.
You're a fucking rat, Jared.
242
00:12:51,360 --> 00:12:53,124
Richard entered us without consent.
243
00:12:53,200 --> 00:12:56,044
In spite of that,
he has raised a real issue here.
244
00:12:56,120 --> 00:12:57,884
Fuck this. I'm gonna Uber home.
245
00:12:58,080 --> 00:13:01,163
Mr. Monahan, good luck
with this whole work release situation,
246
00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:03,322
but I have more important things to do.
247
00:13:03,520 --> 00:13:04,521
Mr. Chugtai.
248
00:13:05,200 --> 00:13:10,286
It appears that 33% of your users
are under the age of 13.
249
00:13:10,360 --> 00:13:16,447
It's also apparent that you have no
parental permission requirements in place.
250
00:13:16,520 --> 00:13:19,967
You're going to want to sit down for this.
251
00:13:29,440 --> 00:13:32,808
- Are you familiar with COPPA?
- Who?
252
00:13:33,080 --> 00:13:36,323
It's the Children's Online
Privacy and Protection Act.
253
00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:39,802
This act establishes strict guidelines
254
00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:43,766
to protect the privacy
of younger children on the Internet.
255
00:13:43,920 --> 00:13:47,242
You are in gross violation of this act.
256
00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:52,488
You know how kids can't have a YouTube
or Facebook account till they're 13?
257
00:13:52,600 --> 00:13:53,931
It's because of this.
258
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:59,882
Yes, but our users are chatting
with each other, Jared, not some old creep.
259
00:13:59,960 --> 00:14:02,122
- No offense.
- None taken.
260
00:14:02,360 --> 00:14:05,364
My shame will linger
even after my voting rights are restored.
261
00:14:05,480 --> 00:14:10,611
Now, are there records
of these chats on your sewer?
262
00:14:10,880 --> 00:14:12,405
Yeah, we store everything.
263
00:14:12,480 --> 00:14:16,246
What... Okay, what's going on?
How serious is this?
264
00:14:16,440 --> 00:14:20,047
Each violation of COPPA
265
00:14:20,120 --> 00:14:23,920
carries a penalty of $16,000.
266
00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:28,210
So, we're fined $16,000? Oh, no.
267
00:14:28,280 --> 00:14:29,930
I hope they take cash.
268
00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:32,844
$16,000 per user.
269
00:14:32,920 --> 00:14:37,005
Not only each user, each use.
270
00:14:43,440 --> 00:14:46,284
Fifty-one thousand estimated underage users
271
00:14:46,360 --> 00:14:49,682
times an average 25.6
chat sessions per user
272
00:14:49,760 --> 00:14:52,730
times $16,000..
273
00:14:56,800 --> 00:14:59,724
- $21 billion?
- (COMPUTER CHIMES)
274
00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:03,642
I mean, how is that even fucking possible?
275
00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:08,121
I mean, I knew Dinesh was going
to fuck this all up, but honestly,
276
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:10,123
this couldn't get any better.
277
00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:14,651
What's with his shirt?
278
00:15:14,720 --> 00:15:18,691
He sort of became ill on himself.
279
00:15:18,760 --> 00:15:21,650
I was wrong. This just got better.
280
00:15:21,720 --> 00:15:25,770
This is all your fault, Richard.
This was your company before it was mine.
281
00:15:25,960 --> 00:15:27,291
What are you talking about?
282
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:28,964
Dinesh, I specifically reminded you
283
00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:31,407
to port over the terms of service
from the platform.
284
00:15:31,480 --> 00:15:35,201
Right. And I asked if you'd done it,
and you said you had.
285
00:15:35,280 --> 00:15:36,281
Okay.
286
00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:39,409
I checked the TOS box
when we submitted it to the App Store,
287
00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:41,528
but then I didn't end
up doing it, all right?
288
00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:44,763
And then when we caught fire,
the last thing I wanted to do
289
00:15:44,880 --> 00:15:47,850
was to bog our users down
with legal bullshit, you know?
290
00:15:47,920 --> 00:15:49,809
I mean, nobody reads that stuff, anyway.
291
00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:52,884
Well, first of all,
everyone reads the terms of service,
292
00:15:52,960 --> 00:15:56,965
and secondly, they would have given us
legal cover from exactly this.
293
00:15:57,040 --> 00:16:00,283
- (COMPUTER CONTINUES CHIMING)
- Every sound is $16,000.
294
00:16:01,280 --> 00:16:04,170
- Fuck!
- All right, all right. Don't think about that.
295
00:16:04,240 --> 00:16:08,006
Just think about how to solve
this massive, massive problem.
296
00:16:08,680 --> 00:16:11,889
Quickly. Quick as you can.
297
00:16:11,960 --> 00:16:13,769
Jared, just...
298
00:16:15,400 --> 00:16:17,448
- Wait. We could shut down.
- (ERLICH COUGHS)
299
00:16:17,880 --> 00:16:21,248
No, no, no. Not when we're this close
to signing a term sheet.
300
00:16:21,560 --> 00:16:23,722
And in case all of you
gents have forgotten,
301
00:16:23,800 --> 00:16:26,724
I'm on the hook for half a million Clambos
for this thing.
302
00:16:26,920 --> 00:16:30,129
Well, we can't stay online!
We're just racking up more fines!
303
00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:32,441
Well, technically, this is a corporation.
304
00:16:32,520 --> 00:16:34,363
So, whatever they fine you,
305
00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,205
they'll really only be able to collect
what the company is worth,
306
00:16:37,280 --> 00:16:39,647
which, at this point,
is, basically, nothing.
307
00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:43,930
That's right. I'm just the CEO.
I'm not personally liable.
308
00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:45,441
Although...
309
00:16:45,520 --> 00:16:48,126
- Although what?
- (COMPUTER CHIMING)
310
00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:51,841
Well, when you lied to me
about adding terms of service,
311
00:16:51,920 --> 00:16:56,482
it could be argued, you violated
your fiduciary duty to the company,
312
00:16:56,560 --> 00:16:58,528
rendering you personally liable.
313
00:16:58,600 --> 00:17:02,730
I mean, if the FTC brought us to trial, I
could be compelled to testify against you.
314
00:17:03,520 --> 00:17:05,124
Jared, I trusted you.
315
00:17:05,280 --> 00:17:10,366
Oh, trust has nothing to do with it,
but thanks for making that official.
316
00:17:10,440 --> 00:17:15,287
So, I could be personally liable
for $21 billion?
317
00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:17,450
Yeah, most likely.
318
00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:21,009
I know in the fable, Pied Piper led
all the children into darkness,
319
00:17:21,080 --> 00:17:24,527
but now, we're doing it.
So, what do you wanna do?
320
00:17:24,600 --> 00:17:26,489
- (COMPUTER commues CHIMING)
{GAGS)
321
00:17:26,680 --> 00:17:28,160
(STRAINING) I'm gonna throw up again.
322
00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:30,404
I'm gonna watch this.
323
00:17:31,920 --> 00:17:34,890
GAVIN: I want full surveillance
on Jack Barker 24/7.
324
00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:37,376
HOOVER: I don't recommend
using conventional listening devices.
325
00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:38,606
He may sweep for those.
326
00:17:38,760 --> 00:17:41,331
I do have a colleague at Facebook
that has a laser microphone,
327
00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:43,721
you can point it at an office window
from a mile away
328
00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:45,484
and read the sound vibrations.
329
00:17:45,560 --> 00:17:47,369
I like it.
330
00:17:47,440 --> 00:17:50,250
Hoover, you're the only person I can trust
at this goddamn company.
331
00:17:50,360 --> 00:17:53,250
- It's good to have a friend.
- I understand that, sir.
332
00:17:53,520 --> 00:17:57,241
Ah, Gavin, there you are.
333
00:17:57,320 --> 00:18:01,291
Well, I don't want to interrupt
your talking with Hoover
334
00:18:01,360 --> 00:18:03,124
and talking and talking about things.
335
00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:07,046
- But I have some concrete news.
Regarding?
336
00:18:07,240 --> 00:18:08,321
Jack Barker.
337
00:18:09,080 --> 00:18:11,208
By foregoing western gadgetry,
338
00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:14,841
simply stationing myself
in the hall outside of his office,
339
00:18:14,920 --> 00:18:19,960
I was able to overhear him
speaking of his plans to move against you.
340
00:18:20,040 --> 00:18:24,250
He even referred to you as "Gavin Smelson."
341
00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:25,321
I knew it.
342
00:18:25,680 --> 00:18:28,684
Good work, Denpok. Good work.
343
00:18:29,040 --> 00:18:30,769
Let's go slice this bastard in half, yeah?
344
00:18:30,960 --> 00:18:33,440
Hold on. We need proof.
345
00:18:33,520 --> 00:18:37,411
Otherwise, he'll just deny it, and it'll
just be a case of "he said, she said."
346
00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:40,131
Good point. Denpok, who was he talking to?
347
00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:42,521
Oh, um...
348
00:18:43,240 --> 00:18:46,403
Alas, I could not see this
from my hidden vantage point.
349
00:18:46,520 --> 00:18:48,568
Hlcheckthelogs
and see who was in his office.
350
00:18:48,640 --> 00:18:49,766
No, because...
351
00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:54,365
No one was there.
352
00:18:54,960 --> 00:18:58,009
I'm confused. Was he on the phone?
353
00:18:58,400 --> 00:19:01,210
Yes. Very perceptive.
354
00:19:01,320 --> 00:19:03,971
- Easy, I'll just pull up his phone records...
- No.
355
00:19:05,200 --> 00:19:06,690
Not the "phone" phone.
356
00:19:06,920 --> 00:19:09,241
So, what was he doing?
Was he video chatting?
357
00:19:09,400 --> 00:19:11,926
That's what it was, chela.
358
00:19:12,040 --> 00:19:16,443
- Even better, I'll pull up the chat data.
- You can do that?
359
00:19:16,520 --> 00:19:18,488
Well, as long as he was on HooliChat.
360
00:19:18,560 --> 00:19:23,088
But the bastard kept grinding in my face
how much he loved PiperChat.
361
00:19:23,640 --> 00:19:25,722
- What if he was using...
- PiperChat!
362
00:19:25,800 --> 00:19:26,801
- Yes.
- Fuck!
363
00:19:26,880 --> 00:19:31,602
He said the resolution was
so vivid and superior to HooliChat.
364
00:19:31,840 --> 00:19:37,006
Ah. Sadly, now,
we'll never know the identity of the person
365
00:19:37,080 --> 00:19:40,607
with whom he was definitely talking.
366
00:19:42,280 --> 00:19:44,123
- Unless...
- Unless what?
367
00:19:48,280 --> 00:19:49,327
RICHARD: Dinesh?
368
00:19:59,120 --> 00:20:03,205
Hey, man. How's it going?
369
00:20:04,480 --> 00:20:05,845
Bad.
370
00:20:06,120 --> 00:20:08,168
Well, look. I've been there, man.
371
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:10,811
- No, you haven't.
- Lhave.
372
00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:16,046
One time when we were
pitching at Ross Lorna,
373
00:20:16,120 --> 00:20:18,043
I threw up in my pants.
(CHUCKLES)
374
00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:21,326
Don't you mean "on"?
375
00:20:21,960 --> 00:20:23,121
Nope.
376
00:20:23,240 --> 00:20:25,288
No, I mean "in."
377
00:20:27,040 --> 00:20:30,647
We were pitching, and, well,
things weren't really going well.
378
00:20:30,720 --> 00:20:31,846
I was getting nervous,
379
00:20:31,920 --> 00:20:34,491
and, I don't know, lthink
I must've eaten something bad that day.
380
00:20:34,560 --> 00:20:38,007
Anyway, my stomach was upside down,
so I made a beeline to the stall.
381
00:20:38,080 --> 00:20:41,766
But then I pulled down my pants, sat down,
382
00:20:41,840 --> 00:20:44,969
but instead of shit, I
threw up into my pants.
383
00:20:48,760 --> 00:20:51,604
Well, lwas CEO for 11 days.
384
00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:55,924
And in that time, I violated the
rights of 50,000 little girls,
385
00:20:56,000 --> 00:20:58,446
exposed them to sexual predators,
386
00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:02,570
and racked up fines
the size of a small nation's GDP.
387
00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:07,369
Yeah. I threw up in my pants. (CHUCKLES)
388
00:21:09,400 --> 00:21:10,526
Fuck.
389
00:21:12,720 --> 00:21:15,291
What do I do, Richard?
390
00:21:15,360 --> 00:21:18,443
- There are no right answers.
- (SIGHS)
391
00:21:18,520 --> 00:21:21,285
You know, when lwas CEO,
392
00:21:21,360 --> 00:21:25,922
I found that it was more about choosing the
one wrong answer that you can live with.
393
00:21:28,040 --> 00:21:29,883
I really loved that video chat.
394
00:21:31,080 --> 00:21:33,242
(PHONE BUZZING)
395
00:21:35,840 --> 00:21:37,649
Hello?
396
00:21:37,720 --> 00:21:39,085
This is he.
397
00:21:40,360 --> 00:21:41,725
What?
398
00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:42,936
(WHISPERS) It's Gavin Belson.
399
00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:44,450
It's Gavin fucking Belson!
400
00:21:45,360 --> 00:21:49,843
Hey. Gavin Belson. What's up?
401
00:21:49,920 --> 00:21:53,367
Oh, my God, we're crushing it.
All the time.
402
00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:55,761
I'm in a bathtub.
403
00:21:56,240 --> 00:21:57,241
Yeah!
404
00:21:57,320 --> 00:21:58,970
(CHUCKLES) Of course. I'd love to.
405
00:21:59,040 --> 00:22:00,405
Bye.
406
00:22:01,200 --> 00:22:05,000
He wants to meet me at Josephina's tonight.
Did I say yes?
407
00:22:05,480 --> 00:22:06,481
(SCOFFS)
408
00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:08,601
Holy shit.
409
00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:11,690
Gavin Belson wants to acquire PiperChat.
410
00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:15,651
He made the same call to me back when
he wanted to make an offer for Pied Piper.
411
00:22:15,720 --> 00:22:19,645
He could take this entire shit-bomb
off Dinesh's hands?
412
00:22:19,720 --> 00:22:21,006
Where's the fun in that?
413
00:22:21,080 --> 00:22:24,004
More importantly, I could get
all my money back. Maybe even more.
414
00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:25,730
We could 10X this motherfucker, gents.
415
00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:27,848
- Although...
- Although what?
416
00:22:27,920 --> 00:22:32,528
Well, I'm sorry to play the Cassandra again,
but Dinesh can't sell Gavin the company.
417
00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:34,204
- Why not?
- Why the fuck not?
418
00:22:34,280 --> 00:22:36,009
It's due diligence.
419
00:22:36,080 --> 00:22:37,809
Gavin doesn't trust anyone.
420
00:22:37,880 --> 00:22:39,803
When I worked for him,
he tried to microchip me.
421
00:22:39,920 --> 00:22:42,491
Before he finalized any acquisition,
422
00:22:42,560 --> 00:22:44,847
his legal team would uncover
our malfeasance.
423
00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:47,207
They'd sniff out the
user issue immediately.
424
00:22:47,280 --> 00:22:50,045
And they'd probably turn you in.
And you do not want that.
425
00:22:50,120 --> 00:22:51,696
I mean, there's also the moral quandary.
426
00:22:51,720 --> 00:22:54,883
Even if he could get away with it,
could Dinesh really sell the company
427
00:22:54,960 --> 00:22:58,726
knowing it's basically a sizzler buffet
for the sexually deranged?
428
00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:00,006
Of course he could.
429
00:23:00,080 --> 00:23:02,651
Because even if there is
a 1% chance of success
430
00:23:02,720 --> 00:23:06,042
and a 99% chance of failure, and prison,
431
00:23:06,680 --> 00:23:10,446
he will do the right thing
and get me my money back.
432
00:23:11,600 --> 00:23:14,171
I'm sorry, Erlich. I've made my decision.
433
00:23:14,240 --> 00:23:18,848
I'm gonna say no to Gavin Belson,
shut it down, and just see what happens.
434
00:23:22,400 --> 00:23:26,041
(YELLS) What the fuck? Huh?
What the fuck?
435
00:23:26,320 --> 00:23:28,687
Jian-Yang!
436
00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:39,322
Hey, Gavin. Well...
437
00:23:39,400 --> 00:23:44,531
Dinesh. Thanks for coming.
438
00:23:45,160 --> 00:23:50,724
Listen, Gavin. I've thought about it, and
if this is about you buying PiperChat...
439
00:23:50,800 --> 00:23:52,928
I didn't come here today
to buy your company.
440
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:54,331
You didn't?
441
00:23:54,400 --> 00:23:57,131
No. I came to take it.
442
00:23:57,200 --> 00:23:58,929
I thought I'd have to buy you out,
443
00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:01,256
and lwanted to know
what kind of CEO I'd be dealing with,
444
00:24:01,280 --> 00:24:04,204
so, I had my comms people pull your press.
445
00:24:04,280 --> 00:24:09,605
Like this interview you did with TechCrunch,
where you describe PiperChat as, and I quote,
446
00:24:09,680 --> 00:24:15,449
"Exactly like HooliChat,
but without the suck-ass parts," end quote.
447
00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:19,323
Or the one you did with Emily Chang
where you told her how you took
448
00:24:19,400 --> 00:24:23,928
"the best parts of HooliChat
and made them less crappy."
449
00:24:24,960 --> 00:24:28,601
I was about to throw you
a massive acquisition deal.
450
00:24:28,680 --> 00:24:34,801
And then I realized you'd already
publicly admitted to stealing my IP.
451
00:24:34,880 --> 00:24:36,370
I hope you have a good lawyer.
452
00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:39,284
- He works at the car wash down the street.
- What?
453
00:24:39,880 --> 00:24:42,850
Look, Gavin, you do not wanna do this.
454
00:24:42,960 --> 00:24:45,770
- I can't explain exactly why...
- Shut up.
455
00:24:47,560 --> 00:24:49,608
This is not a negotiation.
456
00:24:49,680 --> 00:24:54,891
If you fight me, lwill win, and lwill
fuck you in the tech business forever.
457
00:24:54,960 --> 00:24:57,964
No one will hire you. I'm taking PiperChat.
458
00:24:58,040 --> 00:24:59,280
By 8:00 a.m. tomorrow,
459
00:24:59,360 --> 00:25:01,931
you will hand over to Hooli
all your data and systems.
460
00:25:02,000 --> 00:25:04,731
All your users
will be converted to HooliChat users.
461
00:25:04,800 --> 00:25:06,962
It will be like PiperChat never existed.
462
00:25:07,040 --> 00:25:08,565
And what you get out of it
463
00:25:08,640 --> 00:25:12,008
is the chance to walk away
and try and get anotherjob in this town.
464
00:25:12,080 --> 00:25:14,447
You have five seconds to decide.
465
00:25:14,520 --> 00:25:17,091
- Five, four...
- Okay.
466
00:25:17,800 --> 00:25:19,404
So, we're in agreement.
467
00:25:19,480 --> 00:25:22,290
For a 10% stake in your current venture,
468
00:25:22,360 --> 00:25:24,681
you will receive full pool privileges,
469
00:25:24,760 --> 00:25:28,401
more room in the crisper,
and you may live in my home for...
470
00:25:29,240 --> 00:25:31,607
- For free.
- For free for six months.
471
00:25:31,680 --> 00:25:33,808
Fuck you. One year.
472
00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:40,010
Fuck! Fine. Fine. It's a deal.
473
00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:41,487
Deal.
474
00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:46,642
Jian, I mean,
your onerous terms notwithstanding,
475
00:25:46,720 --> 00:25:50,441
I'm very excited to be a
part of your VR play.
476
00:25:50,520 --> 00:25:53,126
_IIVRII?
- VR, virtual reality.
477
00:25:53,200 --> 00:25:55,407
- Who's doing VR?
- You are.
478
00:25:55,480 --> 00:25:56,641
That's what Big Head said.
479
00:25:56,720 --> 00:25:59,405
- This play has to do with the Oculus, right?
- No.
480
00:25:59,480 --> 00:26:01,209
But he said that you said "Oculus."
481
00:26:01,280 --> 00:26:03,886
He said you kept saying it,
"Oculus, Oculus, Oculus."
482
00:26:03,960 --> 00:26:05,246
Octopus.
483
00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:08,647
(SOFTLY) No.
484
00:26:10,320 --> 00:26:11,321
No.
485
00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:14,321
Octopus?
486
00:26:14,400 --> 00:26:16,323
- It's a water animal.
- |...
487
00:26:16,400 --> 00:26:19,563
I know what an octopus is. Just...
488
00:26:19,680 --> 00:26:22,251
What does your application
have to do with octopus?
489
00:26:22,320 --> 00:26:27,121
Eight different ways
to make a Chinese recipe octopus.
490
00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:36,086
So, ljust traded one year of free rent,
full pool privileges,
491
00:26:36,160 --> 00:26:38,288
and more room in the crisper
492
00:26:38,520 --> 00:26:42,525
for an application that is just
493
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:46,283
eight recipes for octopus? Hmm?
494
00:26:46,640 --> 00:26:47,641
Yes.
495
00:26:50,480 --> 00:26:51,925
Hey, guys. They're ready.
496
00:26:55,880 --> 00:26:57,723
- Ooh. Ooh.
- (KIDS LAUGHING)
497
00:26:58,360 --> 00:27:00,044
What the fuck is this?
498
00:27:00,120 --> 00:27:04,330
I went through every chat in his history.
They're all the same.
499
00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:07,768
Perhaps it was another chat format.
500
00:27:07,840 --> 00:27:11,811
Could you acquire Skype or FaceTime
and check them as well?
501
00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:12,880
- What?
- (DOOR OPENS)
502
00:27:12,920 --> 00:27:15,082
Gavin? I'm sorry...
503
00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:18,448
I need to talk to you about
this PiperChat acquisition.
504
00:27:18,520 --> 00:27:22,969
I put together a panel of the most active
users you ported over from PiperChat.
505
00:27:23,040 --> 00:27:24,963
Bear in mind, this group is representative
506
00:27:25,080 --> 00:27:29,961
in terms of gender, race,
and most importantly, age.
507
00:27:30,040 --> 00:27:34,568
Now, who else thinks changing to
a HooliChat login is hella lame?
508
00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:40,330
Madison, Allison, Jennifer, Stephanie,
Quinn, Ingrid,
509
00:27:40,400 --> 00:27:41,686
Kaylie, Ava, Sarah...
510
00:27:41,760 --> 00:27:42,807
Oh, no.
511
00:27:42,880 --> 00:27:44,962
Janelle, Carl.
512
00:27:45,920 --> 00:27:50,926
Now, Carl, you said the new sign-in page
made you nervous.
513
00:27:51,600 --> 00:27:52,965
Did anyone else feel nervous?
514
00:27:53,040 --> 00:27:55,120
- GAVINI (POUNDING AND SHOUTING) Fuck!
- (GIRLS GASP)
515
00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:56,765
(HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING)