1
00:00:48,800 --> 00:00:51,371
It's okay,
you're gonna love it!

2
00:00:52,960 --> 00:00:55,327
Happy first day of school.

3
00:00:56,440 --> 00:00:58,124
Bye, sweetie.

4
00:00:58,280 --> 00:01:00,009
Hi!
Hi.

5
00:01:01,200 --> 00:01:02,531
Hey, I'm Sam.

6
00:01:02,680 --> 00:01:04,091
Hi, I'm Julie.

7
00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:07,810
- Bye!
- Bye, Mom!

8
00:01:10,280 --> 00:01:11,361
I'm Hunter.

9
00:01:11,520 --> 00:01:14,205
Sam's mine, right there.
The one with the glasses.

10
00:01:14,360 --> 00:01:16,601
I'm Lisa.
That's my Julie.

11
00:01:17,920 --> 00:01:19,490
I'm Mitchell.

12
00:01:20,640 --> 00:01:22,130
Kayla's hero.

13
00:01:22,800 --> 00:01:24,802
Oh. Are you okay?
Yeah, yeah.

14
00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:26,121
You crying?

15
00:01:26,280 --> 00:01:28,442
No, man.
It's a big day, that's all.

16
00:01:28,600 --> 00:01:29,647
You know, can I have
a tissue, please?

17
00:01:29,800 --> 00:01:30,801
Yeah, yeah.
Thank you.

18
00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:32,166
It's a big day for all of us.
Yeah.

19
00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:33,646
Thanks.

20
00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:38,682
I think our daughters
are friends.

21
00:01:39,320 --> 00:01:41,846
And I think that means
we're friends.

22
00:01:44,840 --> 00:01:46,729
Should we go get a drink?

23
00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:49,449
You okay? Yeah.
Yeah.

24
00:01:49,600 --> 00:01:51,409
Do you guys wanna
go get a drink?

25
00:01:52,200 --> 00:01:54,521
Ah, they made it.

26
00:01:54,600 --> 00:01:55,840
You guys wanna go
grab a drink real quick?

27
00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:57,490
Is he asking us if we wanna
go grab a drink?

28
00:01:57,640 --> 00:01:59,051
I'm really hoping
it's coffee.

29
00:02:09,360 --> 00:02:10,885
Shut the fuck up!

30
00:02:12,960 --> 00:02:14,849
Happy Halloween!

31
00:02:14,920 --> 00:02:15,921
Assam!

32
00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:18,082
I can see Russia
from my house!

33
00:02:25,640 --> 00:02:29,247
That's right!
Right here! Shoo!

34
00:02:29,960 --> 00:02:32,167
Hey, hey...

35
00:02:34,400 --> 00:02:36,084
Put your seat belts on!

36
00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:42,404
Surprise!

37
00:02:47,520 --> 00:02:48,521
Careful!

38
00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:20,729
You're probably gonna miss these
mornings that we spend together, right?

39
00:03:21,120 --> 00:03:22,121
Stop.

40
00:03:22,560 --> 00:03:25,131
You're gonna make me cry, and I don't
wanna cry because it's prom night.

41
00:03:25,280 --> 00:03:27,760
It's supposed to be like the
most magical night of your life,

42
00:03:27,920 --> 00:03:29,843
and, you know, I'm just
so anxious about fl.

43
00:03:30,760 --> 00:03:34,287
Well, call me
if you feel anxious.

44
00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:36,767
Or maybe Face Time me,
if it wasn't too loud.

45
00:03:36,920 --> 00:03:40,527
If it was too loud, you could just...
We could wave or whatever.

46
00:03:40,680 --> 00:03:41,727
That'd be funny.

47
00:03:41,880 --> 00:03:42,961
And then, I can...

48
00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:44,366
You know
what I was thinking?

49
00:03:44,520 --> 00:03:47,091
You should send me photos
throughout the night.

50
00:03:47,240 --> 00:03:51,962
Not like all night long, but if you
could do it every 30 minutes or so

51
00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:54,407
then I can put together
one of those i Books.

52
00:03:54,560 --> 00:03:55,686
That would be so fun.
Yeah.

53
00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:57,689
That would be a really... I don't
think you would regret that.

54
00:03:58,800 --> 00:04:00,211
Hmm.

55
00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:01,441
Mom?
Mmm-hmm.

56
00:04:02,600 --> 00:04:05,683
Are you gonna be okay
when I go to college?

57
00:04:05,840 --> 00:04:07,524
Who, me?
Yeah.

58
00:04:07,720 --> 00:04:09,085
Me?

59
00:04:11,160 --> 00:04:12,161
What?

60
00:04:12,640 --> 00:04:15,769
Please. Don't even
get me...

61
00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:16,966
Don't even...

62
00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:20,169
Please!

63
00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:25,331
Okay. bye, Mom!

64
00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:26,401
Okay, bye!

65
00:04:26,480 --> 00:04:28,164
I love you!
Okay, I love you.

66
00:04:35,800 --> 00:04:37,131
Oh, good,
you did the laundry.

67
00:04:37,280 --> 00:04:40,170
Yeah, and got a totally
sleepy, happy baby.

68
00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:42,322
Full-blown renaissance man.

69
00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:43,970
Oh!
Beehive

70
00:04:44,120 --> 00:04:45,724
It's a good thing
she's asleep, too.

71
00:04:45,880 --> 00:04:46,881
I was going
through the laundry.

72
00:04:46,960 --> 00:04:48,689
Uh-huh.
Found these new thongs.

73
00:04:48,840 --> 00:04:50,001
You know what I'm gonna
do with these?

74
00:04:51,440 --> 00:04:53,647
"Paging Dr. Muff Diver.
Dr. Muff Diver,

75
00:04:53,800 --> 00:04:56,087
"you're needed in the OR
immediately, emergency surgery."

76
00:04:56,240 --> 00:04:57,890
Later on tonight, I'm tearing
these off with my teeth

77
00:04:58,040 --> 00:05:00,042
like an old-school
cartoon billy goat.

78
00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:02,441
Honey. Mitchell.

79
00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:06,281
Those are your daughter's.

80
00:05:08,200 --> 00:05:09,850
No way. Kayla wears
cleats and Bears jerseys,

81
00:05:09,960 --> 00:05:11,166
not some dirty stripper
underhand

82
00:05:11,320 --> 00:05:12,321
You thought they were mine.

83
00:05:12,440 --> 00:05:14,124
What am I, giving her
allowance in singles?

84
00:05:14,280 --> 00:05:15,725
Go tell her
she can't wear these.

85
00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:17,041
Tell her
they'll make her sterile,

86
00:05:17,200 --> 00:05:18,804
like with the laptop
and my brother's balls.

87
00:05:19,000 --> 00:05:20,843
We're not sure that's what
happened with your brother.

88
00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:22,525
Honey, you're being
ridiculous.

89
00:05:22,680 --> 00:05:23,920
Kayla's becoming a woman.

90
00:05:24,080 --> 00:05:26,447
This isn't the time to tighten your grip.
It's the time to loosen it.

91
00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:28,764
This? This means
we tighten the grip.

92
00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:30,968
This isn't built for comfort,
it's built for speed.

93
00:05:31,120 --> 00:05:32,167
We need to slow her
the fuck down.

94
00:05:33,080 --> 00:05:35,321
The appliances go in
after the backslash.

95
00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:37,648
We've done it
the same way every time.

96
00:05:40,560 --> 00:05:42,005
Uh-huh. All right,
put him on the phone.

97
00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:46,450
I'm in the bathroom.

98
00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:10,331
Thanks,
I was looking for that.

99
00:06:12,600 --> 00:06:13,840
You mind telling me
what this is?

100
00:06:13,920 --> 00:06:15,684
Uh, fuzz.
Yeah.

101
00:06:15,840 --> 00:06:16,841
Yeah, fuzz.

102
00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:19,128
It's what I thought it was and
then on further investigation,

103
00:06:19,280 --> 00:06:21,521
it is clearly an unraveled
filter of a cigarette.

104
00:06:21,640 --> 00:06:23,449
Kayla, are you a smoker?

105
00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:24,931
What? No.

106
00:06:25,400 --> 00:06:27,084
I'm not a smoker, Dad.

107
00:06:27,280 --> 00:06:31,001
Hey, haven't you seen the billions of
ads that tell you not to do this stuff?

108
00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:33,447
Dad! You can't teach someone
not to try things. Okay?

109
00:06:33,600 --> 00:06:35,887
That's what trying things
is for. To teach you things.

110
00:06:36,080 --> 00:06:37,081
It's a contradiction.

111
00:06:37,680 --> 00:06:41,241
It's like telling me not to go for
a triple on a base hit to the gap

112
00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:42,765
when I've made
a good turn around first

113
00:06:42,960 --> 00:06:44,724
and I know that the right
fielder has a weak arm.

114
00:06:47,160 --> 00:06:48,161
Damn it, you're smart.

115
00:06:48,920 --> 00:06:51,571
Okay. Yeah. All right. Time
to get ready for school, Dad.

116
00:06:51,760 --> 00:06:52,841
Okay, all right.

117
00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:55,370
Julie! Sam!

118
00:06:55,560 --> 00:06:56,607
Hey, girl!

119
00:06:56,680 --> 00:06:57,761
Whoa!

120
00:06:59,840 --> 00:07:00,841
I almost died.

121
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:03,241
Prom night!

122
00:07:03,360 --> 00:07:05,567
I'm so, so excited!

123
00:07:05,720 --> 00:07:06,767
Me, too.

124
00:07:10,560 --> 00:07:12,164
Mmm. I love you.

125
00:07:12,520 --> 00:07:13,965
I love you, too.

126
00:07:14,240 --> 00:07:15,241
All right.

127
00:07:15,320 --> 00:07:16,560
We're so gross.
I know.

128
00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:18,085
People are looking at us.
I don't care.

129
00:07:18,240 --> 00:07:20,083
We better get "Cutest
Couple" in the yearbook.

130
00:07:31,600 --> 00:07:32,601
I'm having sex.

131
00:07:33,520 --> 00:07:36,842
- That's great!
- I'm having soup.

132
00:07:36,920 --> 00:07:38,331
No. Tonight.

133
00:07:38,520 --> 00:07:39,521
With Austin.

134
00:07:39,720 --> 00:07:41,290
Wait, you're finally gonna do it?
Yeah.

135
00:07:41,480 --> 00:07:45,121
I mean, you know, we've been dating
for six months and we love each other

136
00:07:45,280 --> 00:07:48,409
and I just awkwardly got my pediatrician
to put me on birth control.

137
00:07:48,880 --> 00:07:50,484
But she gave me
a sticker.

138
00:07:50,680 --> 00:07:52,250
Two because
I was good, so...

139
00:07:52,600 --> 00:07:57,003
I know it's kind of corny or whatever
but it just seems like prom night,

140
00:07:57,200 --> 00:07:58,725
it's kind of perfect,
you know?

141
00:07:58,880 --> 00:08:01,690
We're gonna have,
like, dim lighting

142
00:08:01,840 --> 00:08:03,490
and rose petals on the bed

143
00:08:03,640 --> 00:08:05,449
and the scent from that candle
that gets me horny

144
00:08:05,600 --> 00:08:07,170
every time I pass it
in Walgreens.

145
00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:08,606
All candles get me horny.

146
00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:10,211
I'm gonna
look into Austin's eyes

147
00:08:10,960 --> 00:08:12,928
and then he's gonna
look into mine

148
00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:16,482
and then we're gonna touch
each other's faces, you know?

149
00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:18,171
For, like, a long time.

150
00:08:18,320 --> 00:08:20,004
Like, a long time.

151
00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:23,528
Just to, like, connect.
And then we're gonna...

152
00:08:24,320 --> 00:08:25,765
Key pow.

153
00:08:27,880 --> 00:08:29,006
All right, fuck it, I'm in.

154
00:08:29,520 --> 00:08:30,521
- What?
- I'm in.

155
00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:31,601
I'm having sex tonight, too.

156
00:08:31,680 --> 00:08:33,489
Uh...
Just like that?

157
00:08:33,560 --> 00:08:34,561
Yeah. I mean, why not?

158
00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:35,687
Because it's your first time

159
00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:38,644
and your first time should be
special and perfect.

160
00:08:38,800 --> 00:08:40,086
Yours can be special
and perfect.

161
00:08:40,240 --> 00:08:43,881
Mine is gonna be tonight,
and with that dude.

162
00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:45,570
They're just brownies,
they're not, like...

163
00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:48,371
Connor Baldric?
Your lab partner?

164
00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:50,124
Yeah. What? You haven't
even hooked up with him.

165
00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:52,601
You haven't even seen his thing yet.
What if he has a weird one?

166
00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:53,881
They're all weird.

167
00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:56,441
Penises are not for looking
at, they're for use.

168
00:08:56,640 --> 00:08:58,165
They're like plungers. Listen,

169
00:08:58,320 --> 00:08:59,810
my student athlete days
are over.

170
00:08:59,960 --> 00:09:02,008
Tonight is the beginning
of my adult life

171
00:09:02,160 --> 00:09:04,686
and for the first time
I can do whatever I want.

172
00:09:04,840 --> 00:09:08,083
So I wanna go to prom, get
drunk, get potted up on weed

173
00:09:08,240 --> 00:09:09,730
and lose
my goddamn virginity.

174
00:09:09,880 --> 00:09:11,564
We're gonna have the same
first-time sex anniversary.

175
00:09:11,720 --> 00:09:13,324
We can go to dinner every year
and commemorate it.

176
00:09:13,480 --> 00:09:15,323
Olive Garden.
Yes! Olive Garden.

177
00:09:15,480 --> 00:09:16,970
Bread sticks for life, bitch!

178
00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:20,482
Oh, my God! It is gonna
be such a relief

179
00:09:20,640 --> 00:09:22,881
to get this over and done
with before college.

180
00:09:24,280 --> 00:09:25,566
Um...

181
00:09:25,640 --> 00:09:27,051
No, I mean, like...
No, it's cool.

182
00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,043
I just don't think
I'm there yet.

183
00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:32,602
You know, maybe something might
happen tonight with me and Chad,

184
00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:36,885
but I don't think sex
is gonna be that thing.

185
00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:46,161
Sam?

186
00:09:49,400 --> 00:09:51,562
But you never know
what could happen.

187
00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:54,769
I mean, maybe my inner sexual
Smaug will emerge from its keep

188
00:09:54,920 --> 00:09:56,649
and spread its mighty wings.

189
00:09:58,600 --> 00:10:00,329
I never know
what you're talking about.

190
00:10:00,480 --> 00:10:02,130
Yeah, me neither.

191
00:10:11,600 --> 00:10:12,601
Oh...

192
00:10:25,840 --> 00:10:27,729
Julie, is that you?

193
00:10:35,280 --> 00:10:36,725
So realistic.

194
00:10:40,680 --> 00:10:42,170
Ugh.

195
00:10:45,160 --> 00:10:46,889
Come on, Sam,
we're waiting.

196
00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:48,764
Be right there!

197
00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:51,241
All right.
There she is.

198
00:10:51,320 --> 00:10:53,129
Took me 2 minutes to figure out
how to do video on this thing

199
00:10:53,280 --> 00:10:54,611
but I finally got it.

200
00:10:54,680 --> 00:10:56,250
Nope.

201
00:10:56,320 --> 00:10:57,526
I took a picture of myself.

202
00:10:57,680 --> 00:10:59,842
Sir, video, please.

203
00:10:59,920 --> 00:11:03,720
Wow! That Chad is going to rip
through his little tuxedo pants.

204
00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:04,881
Mom!
What?

205
00:11:05,040 --> 00:11:06,280
That's gross.
Why?

206
00:11:06,440 --> 00:11:09,569
Because you're practically imagining
your daughter in sexual congress.

207
00:11:09,720 --> 00:11:10,721
You sicko.

208
00:11:13,120 --> 00:11:16,761
I was just trying to connect with you.
You never talk to us anymore.

209
00:11:16,920 --> 00:11:18,285
Hey, I got this.

210
00:11:18,440 --> 00:11:19,441
Okay-

211
00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:25,009
Prom night, huh?

212
00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:27,802
I got sad and reflective
on my prom night, too.

213
00:11:27,880 --> 00:11:28,881
You were?
Yeah.

214
00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:30,411
I was scared I wasn't
gonna stay friends

215
00:11:30,560 --> 00:11:32,050
with the guys I had been
around most of my life.

216
00:11:32,120 --> 00:11:33,121
But I was able to...

217
00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:35,646
Hey, baby, I love you so much.
You just really freaked her out.

218
00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:40,643
Sweetie, if you're worried about that
at all, just know you shouldn't be.

219
00:11:40,840 --> 00:11:43,127
You never stay friends
with people from high school.

220
00:11:43,280 --> 00:11:45,328
I mean, the oldest friend
I have is Jan from work

221
00:11:45,480 --> 00:11:46,481
and I've known her
for three months.

222
00:11:46,600 --> 00:11:47,601
Who's Jan?

223
00:11:47,680 --> 00:11:50,001
You know Jan, babe. She
draws those silly cartoons.

224
00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:51,406
Oh, racist Jan.

225
00:11:51,520 --> 00:11:52,521
Yeah, that's the one.

226
00:11:52,600 --> 00:11:53,761
Who you are today

227
00:11:53,920 --> 00:11:57,447
is not who you're going to be.
And that's okay.

228
00:11:57,600 --> 00:11:59,807
That's good therapy.
And who you become will be

229
00:11:59,960 --> 00:12:02,486
so different that your friends
won't understand you anymore

230
00:12:02,640 --> 00:12:04,165
and then you will wake up
and realize

231
00:12:04,320 --> 00:12:07,688
these friendships are over. This
feels like a very painful divorce,

232
00:12:07,840 --> 00:12:09,251
just like the one I had
with your father,

233
00:12:09,400 --> 00:12:11,528
but then you'll find a Frank.

234
00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:14,604
Uh, I appreciate that,
but that's not my deal.

235
00:12:14,760 --> 00:12:17,286
I'm still cool with a lot of
my boys because on prom night,

236
00:12:17,440 --> 00:12:23,402
me, Dennis, Matt, and Cory all convinced
our friend Steve to join the Army.

237
00:12:23,560 --> 00:12:25,449
He fought
in the Persian Gulf War.

238
00:12:25,640 --> 00:12:27,165
He died right away.

239
00:12:27,320 --> 00:12:30,210
But once you go
through something like that,

240
00:12:30,360 --> 00:12:32,408
you're bonded for life.

241
00:12:32,600 --> 00:12:36,047
The bedrock of deep meaningful
friendships is shared experience.

242
00:12:37,960 --> 00:12:40,486
I thought they were gonna
put him in the Reserves.

243
00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:46,684
That is some horseshit.

244
00:12:51,640 --> 00:12:53,051
Hmm.

245
00:13:00,160 --> 00:13:01,525
Wow.

246
00:13:01,680 --> 00:13:03,808
You look so beautiful!

247
00:13:03,880 --> 00:13:06,167
Turn around.

248
00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:09,968
Wow.

249
00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:11,405
Oh, my goodness.

250
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:13,401
Wow.

251
00:13:13,640 --> 00:13:16,166
So what's the big plan
for after prom?

252
00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:18,171
Uh, we're just
going to Austin's.

253
00:13:18,320 --> 00:13:19,606
You really like him, huh?

254
00:13:20,440 --> 00:13:23,683
Yeah. Yeah, I mean... Yeah, he's cool.
It's not like serious or anything.

255
00:13:23,840 --> 00:13:25,808
His mom told me
he got into UCLA.

256
00:13:25,960 --> 00:13:26,961
That's nice.

257
00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:28,769
Yeah, I mean, it's good.

258
00:13:29,400 --> 00:13:32,847
You remember that time when, like,
I thought about going to UCLA?

259
00:13:32,920 --> 00:13:33,921
Yes.

260
00:13:34,040 --> 00:13:37,044
That would've been crazy. That
would've been the worst mistake ever.

261
00:13:37,440 --> 00:13:39,807
I don't think it would've been
that huge of a mistake.

262
00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:42,571
Uh,yes,
it would have.

263
00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:46,770
University of Chicago is perfect.
It's 45 minutes away.

264
00:13:46,920 --> 00:13:50,367
So that way you're gone
but you're not gone, gone.

265
00:13:51,200 --> 00:13:52,201
But I'm gone.

266
00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:54,723
Right. But not, like, gone.

267
00:13:54,880 --> 00:13:56,484
Right, but, like,
I'm going to college

268
00:13:56,640 --> 00:14:00,281
and, like, I'm not gonna live at home.
So I'm, like, I'm gone.

269
00:14:00,760 --> 00:14:01,966
Mmm-hmm.

270
00:14:02,840 --> 00:14:04,729
Why are my boobs so big?

271
00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:06,001
Ready, Kayla?

272
00:14:06,120 --> 00:14:07,121
Yep.

273
00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:11,844
And now, standing at 5' 7",

274
00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:14,401
5' 9" if you count the heels,

275
00:14:14,560 --> 00:14:18,167
straight out of Great Lakes High School,
the prettiest girl in all of prom,

276
00:14:18,480 --> 00:14:20,642
Kayla Cannes.

277
00:14:23,800 --> 00:14:24,926
Oh.

278
00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:26,331
Just high-fives from now on.

279
00:14:26,880 --> 00:14:27,927
Okay-

280
00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:29,411
Oh, honey, I never thought
I'd see you in a dress!

281
00:14:29,560 --> 00:14:31,210
Technically
it's not a full dress.

282
00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:33,249
Some material is missing
from the middle there.

283
00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:34,401
Okay.

284
00:14:34,480 --> 00:14:35,527
You look great.

285
00:14:35,600 --> 00:14:37,648
All right, yeah,
I think it's time to go.

286
00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:39,928
Yes. Yeah. Honey,
we gotta go.

287
00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:42,081
Honey?

288
00:14:42,280 --> 00:14:43,884
Dad, are you okay?

289
00:14:44,320 --> 00:14:46,288
It's like when
he watched Frozen.

290
00:14:47,560 --> 00:14:48,561
Come on.

291
00:14:50,120 --> 00:14:51,770
Hi, how are you?

292
00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:53,684
Hi!
Hi! How are you?

293
00:14:53,840 --> 00:14:54,921
Hi, Marcie.

294
00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:56,843
Oh. Uh-huh.

295
00:14:57,400 --> 00:14:58,401
Hey!
Hey, Mitchell.

296
00:14:58,480 --> 00:14:59,720
Haven't seen you in a while.
Yeah.

297
00:14:59,880 --> 00:15:01,962
You know, I was worried when I never
heard back from you about hot yoga.

298
00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:05,808
Called you a bunch of times. I ended up
having to eat that two-for-one Group on.

299
00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:07,405
Oh, yeah, I don't really
do the hot-yoga thing.

300
00:15:08,400 --> 00:15:09,890
We should catch up, though,
right?

301
00:15:10,040 --> 00:15:11,326
Yeah.
Like a lunch, I don't know.

302
00:15:11,520 --> 00:15:13,204
Yeah, maybe. Yeah.
Give me a call.

303
00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:14,646
I've been calling you.
Mmm-hmm.

304
00:15:15,280 --> 00:15:16,281
It doesn't work.

305
00:15:16,400 --> 00:15:17,731
It's not effective.

306
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:36,001
I don't even know!
Wait, you guys.

307
00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:38,521
Wait, this is, like, the best
lighting with the Valencia filter...

308
00:15:38,680 --> 00:15:40,364
Oh, God. All right.
Here we go.

309
00:15:41,560 --> 00:15:42,561
Yeah, okay. That's enough.

310
00:15:42,640 --> 00:15:43,641
One more.
We're good.

311
00:15:43,760 --> 00:15:45,762
Oh, my God, we need to
get this party started.

312
00:15:45,960 --> 00:15:47,121
Ooh, okay, Julie.
Hmm.

313
00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:48,281
I got you something.

314
00:15:49,680 --> 00:15:50,727
It's coconut oil.

315
00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:52,481
For lube.

316
00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:55,882
I hear it works just as well and it
makes blowjobs taste like Almond Joy.

317
00:15:55,960 --> 00:15:58,122
Thank God it doesn't
taste like Mounds.

318
00:15:58,280 --> 00:16:00,203
I'd rather eat 10 dicks
than one Mound.

319
00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:02,966
Thank you. That's so sweet!

320
00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:05,411
Oh, my God, I'm so excited.

321
00:16:05,560 --> 00:16:07,722
Me, too. You have to text me,
like, right away.

322
00:16:07,880 --> 00:16:09,484
Oh, my God, we're gonna be
doing it at the same time.

323
00:16:09,560 --> 00:16:11,483
Oh, my God. We have
to talk about it tomorrow.

324
00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:12,721
Yeah. You're gonna know
every detail.

325
00:16:12,840 --> 00:16:14,922
There's gonna be so much to talk...
Guys? Hey, guys!

326
00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:18,323
I want in on this sex pact.

327
00:16:18,480 --> 00:16:21,484
Are you sure? You don't have to
do this just because we are.

328
00:16:21,640 --> 00:16:22,880
No, that's not why.

329
00:16:23,080 --> 00:16:25,128
I want to have sex.

330
00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:28,170
Yeah. That's something all
three of us have in common.

331
00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:34,009
Mmm-hmm. Chad is gonna tap
that ass with his penis

332
00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,011
and I doubt we'll have anal
the first time, but...

333
00:16:38,280 --> 00:16:39,281
All right!

334
00:16:39,360 --> 00:16:40,407
This is gonna make tonight
even more perfect.

335
00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:41,601
Yeah.
It's gonna be the three of us!

336
00:16:41,760 --> 00:16:43,524
Yes!

337
00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:45,602
Prom night,
motherfuckers!

338
00:16:45,760 --> 00:16:48,047
Yeah!

339
00:16:48,120 --> 00:16:49,770
Shoo!

340
00:16:49,840 --> 00:16:51,729
Rudy, it's coming up.
Turn left, bro.

341
00:16:51,800 --> 00:16:54,929
Jesus, Rudy!
What the fuck?

342
00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:58,371
Oh, my God.
It's my fucking dad.

343
00:17:04,480 --> 00:17:08,121
Yeah! Prom night,
fiche

344
00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:10,929
Shoo-hew!

345
00:17:11,200 --> 00:17:13,726
Oh, God, it's him.
Arms up. Yo!

346
00:17:14,440 --> 00:17:18,889
We gonna light
it up like it's prom night

347
00:17:19,360 --> 00:17:20,850
Tao Cruz.

348
00:17:20,920 --> 00:17:22,285
Like it's prom night

349
00:17:22,440 --> 00:17:23,680
You got this, girl.

350
00:17:23,840 --> 00:17:26,730
Don't mess this up because
that limo is totally awesome.

351
00:17:27,400 --> 00:17:29,641
Sam!Sam!

352
00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:31,969
Tao Cruz. Shoo.

353
00:17:35,320 --> 00:17:36,321
Sorry.

354
00:17:36,440 --> 00:17:38,010
Sorry Oh!

355
00:17:38,080 --> 00:17:39,684
Who O.

356
00:17:47,560 --> 00:17:48,971
You're so grown up!

357
00:17:49,120 --> 00:17:50,645
Dad, what are you doing here?

358
00:17:51,160 --> 00:17:55,245
You think I'm gonna miss the most
important night soundproofing?

359
00:17:55,320 --> 00:17:56,321
That's graduation.

360
00:17:56,400 --> 00:17:58,607
No. Graduation's for losers.

361
00:17:58,800 --> 00:18:00,006
I didn't even go
to my graduation.

362
00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:02,242
But prom night,
that's a big one.

363
00:18:02,720 --> 00:18:04,370
Prom was the best night
of my life.

364
00:18:04,560 --> 00:18:06,050
I think about it every day

365
00:18:06,200 --> 00:18:07,850
and I want you to have
the same experience.

366
00:18:08,240 --> 00:18:09,401
Tonight you have fun,

367
00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:12,723
you don't worry about any rules
that your mom or Frank laid down.

368
00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:14,445
No one gives
a fuck about Frank.

369
00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:17,206
All I know is this. You look amazing
and I would love to grab a quick pic.

370
00:18:17,360 --> 00:18:21,285
No. Go stand with the other
parents and try to be normal.

371
00:18:21,440 --> 00:18:23,283
Sam, I'm not a normal parent.

372
00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:24,805
I don't even...

373
00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:26,201
Holy shit,
you invited Hunter?

374
00:18:26,320 --> 00:18:27,367
No, of course not.

375
00:18:27,520 --> 00:18:29,409
I haven't talked to him since
he and Brenda got divorced.

376
00:18:29,560 --> 00:18:31,244
You know he calls me all the time?
What?

377
00:18:31,400 --> 00:18:32,970
He wants to play darts.
I don't play darts!

378
00:18:33,120 --> 00:18:34,565
Darts?
You kidding me?

379
00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:36,449
Anyway, I can't hang out with him.
I'll be guilty by association.

380
00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:39,604
No. No, I will never forgive
that babysitter fucker.

381
00:18:40,160 --> 00:18:41,241
Hey, Hunter!
Hey, man. Good to see you.

382
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:42,686
What up?

383
00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:45,445
Ah...
Ah!

384
00:18:47,640 --> 00:18:48,721
Did you have
another daughter?

385
00:18:48,880 --> 00:18:50,609
I did. I did.

386
00:18:50,760 --> 00:18:52,762
Thank you. It's been wonderful.
Yeah.

387
00:18:52,920 --> 00:18:55,571
I'm thinking about doing that again.
You know, the whole second round?

388
00:18:55,720 --> 00:18:58,451
I think a lot of dads kind of get
it right the second time around.

389
00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:01,880
Or, you know, you could just
raise the one that you have.

390
00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:04,884
Well, I did. Too late for that.
Raised, job done.

391
00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:06,969
Hi, honey.
Actually, I heard

392
00:19:07,160 --> 00:19:10,369
if you spend a significant amount
of time with your children

393
00:19:10,520 --> 00:19:14,684
that you develop some kind of,
like, telekinetic bond with them.

394
00:19:14,880 --> 00:19:16,609
Is that true?
I've heard. Mmm-hmm.

395
00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:20,202
I hope it's not true because if it is, Sam
has been looking at a lot of Asian porn.

396
00:19:22,320 --> 00:19:23,321
My wife's Asian.

397
00:19:24,280 --> 00:19:25,850
Indian.
That's Asian.

398
00:19:26,000 --> 00:19:27,650
This is more like, uh...

399
00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:30,929
It looks like the typical Asian.
Yep, good seeing you, man.

400
00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:32,491
Okay, good to see you, brother.
You know what I mean.

401
00:19:33,800 --> 00:19:35,564
Who's this guy?
Who are you?

402
00:19:35,720 --> 00:19:36,721
Dad, this is my date.

403
00:19:36,800 --> 00:19:37,801
Hi.

404
00:19:37,880 --> 00:19:39,723
Uh, it's great to meet you,
sir. I'm... I'm Connor.

405
00:19:39,880 --> 00:19:42,008
Connor and I were in the same
science class. We're lab partners.

406
00:19:42,200 --> 00:19:45,329
Yeah. We're working
on our chemistry.

407
00:19:45,760 --> 00:19:46,841
Uh...

408
00:19:47,800 --> 00:19:50,280
I'm gonna get a napkin,
if that's cool.

409
00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:51,771
Okay-

410
00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:55,487
Okay, so, uh...

411
00:19:55,560 --> 00:19:58,882
With this, it's one shot
to the groin, stab, and drag.

412
00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:02,682
I refuse to believe she couldn't
do better than that loser.

413
00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:04,729
Oh, I think Chad seems nice.

414
00:20:04,880 --> 00:20:07,486
Chad? No, Chad's amazing.
Look at that fedora.

415
00:20:07,680 --> 00:20:09,842
I'm not talking about Chad, I'm
talking about fucking Frank.

416
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:11,001
What a dick.

417
00:20:11,160 --> 00:20:13,925
Frank does not seem
like a dick to me.

418
00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:15,525
He seems like a nice guy.
And you know what?

419
00:20:15,680 --> 00:20:18,524
Don't blame Brenda.
It's really hard being alone.

420
00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:20,330
Let's just agree
to disagree on Frank.

421
00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:22,323
Here they come.
Okay, just be cool.

422
00:20:22,480 --> 00:20:24,244
He's gonna talk about his
tow truck company instantly.

423
00:20:24,400 --> 00:20:27,006
I guarantee you he's gonna
throw that shit in my face.

424
00:20:27,200 --> 00:20:28,531
Be cool, be cool, be cool.

425
00:20:28,600 --> 00:20:30,921
Brenda.
Hunter.

426
00:20:32,120 --> 00:20:33,121
Frank.

427
00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:34,201
Lisa.

428
00:20:34,600 --> 00:20:35,601
What'd I do?

429
00:20:36,040 --> 00:20:38,771
I'm sorry, I don't know why I just said
your name like that. This is so nice.

430
00:20:38,960 --> 00:20:40,291
Thank you.
You're welcome.

431
00:20:42,640 --> 00:20:44,369
Okay.

432
00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:45,841
No,no,no.
Geese,Geese,Geese.

433
00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:47,684
I gotta go get
Julie's wrap.

434
00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:49,444
Mmm.

435
00:20:49,560 --> 00:20:52,086
Were you gonna let our daughter
take a fucking Left to prom?

436
00:20:52,240 --> 00:20:53,241
What is this, Afghanistan?

437
00:20:53,400 --> 00:20:54,686
How'd you pay
for that limo, Hunter?

438
00:20:54,760 --> 00:20:55,966
'Cause I know your credit's
in the shutter.

439
00:20:56,120 --> 00:20:57,451
It is.

440
00:20:57,680 --> 00:20:59,489
Because I bought
your mom a wheelchair.

441
00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:00,806
She's gonna pay you back.

442
00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:02,086
With what money, Brenda?

443
00:21:02,280 --> 00:21:04,203
Can she pay me back with crackers
that she steals from restaurants?

444
00:21:04,360 --> 00:21:06,408
I don't wanna talk about your mom, I
don't wanna talk about her wheelchair.

445
00:21:06,560 --> 00:21:09,484
All I care about is that my daughter
has the greatest night of her life.

446
00:21:09,640 --> 00:21:11,688
If it was her greatest night,
you would not be here.

447
00:21:12,360 --> 00:21:14,681
Oh, what a sick burn. All
right, all right, all right.

448
00:21:14,840 --> 00:21:16,649
Good. Navaho,yo,yo,yo,
we're all adults here.

449
00:21:16,800 --> 00:21:19,041
Let's not make it
uncomfortable.

450
00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:21,487
If you're gonna be around more,
let's have a beer sometime.

451
00:21:21,640 --> 00:21:24,291
Okay, first of all, I don't wanna
go to have a beer with you.

452
00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:26,363
I don't wanna hang out with you. I don't
like you, I don't like your wife.

453
00:21:26,520 --> 00:21:29,046
I don't like your guys' deal. I
think it sucks and it's played out.

454
00:21:29,200 --> 00:21:31,567
Hey, if you ever change
your mind, here's my card.

455
00:21:31,720 --> 00:21:32,721
Ah, here we go.

456
00:21:33,120 --> 00:21:35,202
"Tow with Frank." Where'd you
come up with that name?

457
00:21:35,360 --> 00:21:37,124
It's very straightforward.
All right, I'll tell you this.

458
00:21:37,280 --> 00:21:38,805
The design of that card
is pretty cool.

459
00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:40,530
And my favorite part
is right fucking there.

460
00:21:40,840 --> 00:21:41,841
Oh.

461
00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:14,725
V Vow, that is just...
No, that's us, Frank.

462
00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:17,087
You've taken about 15 goddamn selfish.
I got it. I got it.

463
00:22:17,360 --> 00:22:18,964
Yeah!
All right.

464
00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:21,201
Bye, Mom.

465
00:22:21,280 --> 00:22:22,805
- Have fun, honey. Okay.
- I will.

466
00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:24,041
Bye,Dad.

467
00:22:24,120 --> 00:22:26,851
Remember, stab, turn, drag.

468
00:22:27,000 --> 00:22:28,001
I don't have the knife, Dad.

469
00:22:28,200 --> 00:22:29,201
Yes, you do.
Check your clutch.

470
00:22:29,600 --> 00:22:30,726
Ugh.

471
00:22:31,440 --> 00:22:33,169
Hey, uh,
it's been a pleasure, sir.

472
00:22:33,440 --> 00:22:35,522
I really, um...
I'm honored.

473
00:22:36,600 --> 00:22:37,601
Oh!

474
00:22:38,120 --> 00:22:40,600
Intense, professional grip.
Cheers!

475
00:22:40,800 --> 00:22:42,370
Take it easy,
big guy. Hey, uh...

476
00:22:44,360 --> 00:22:46,044
You guys have
a good night, too, you know.

477
00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:47,201
Thank you.

478
00:22:47,640 --> 00:22:49,210
See that smirk?
What was up with that smirk?

479
00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:51,161
You are intense.

480
00:22:51,280 --> 00:22:52,281
Sam.
Oh.

481
00:22:52,360 --> 00:22:53,805
Hey! Mr. Lockwood.
Hey!

482
00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:54,881
Pleasure to meet you.
Chad, yes.

483
00:22:54,960 --> 00:22:57,281
Come on, man. Bring it in.
Yes. Good. Yeah.

484
00:22:57,800 --> 00:22:58,767
My hat?

485
00:22:58,880 --> 00:23:01,008
I wanna talk to Sam real quick.
Yeah, okay.

486
00:23:01,440 --> 00:23:02,965
Let me get a picture
real quick.

487
00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:04,007
Chad.
Oh.

488
00:23:04,120 --> 00:23:05,485
Real quick photo. Just,
just so fast. Okay.

489
00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:07,483
Don't even fuck with the filter.
Just plain.

490
00:23:07,640 --> 00:23:09,244
Here we go.
There we go.

491
00:23:09,400 --> 00:23:11,164
And then you wanna get a quick
one of me and Chad real quick?

492
00:23:11,320 --> 00:23:12,685
That sounds cool. Yep.
Okay.

493
00:23:12,840 --> 00:23:15,286
Sammy, here you go, baby. Real quick.
Just a couple fun ones.

494
00:23:15,440 --> 00:23:16,407
CHAD; Like this?

495
00:23:16,520 --> 00:23:18,170
Bros.

496
00:23:18,560 --> 00:23:19,721
Duck lips.

497
00:23:20,240 --> 00:23:21,844
And then just kind of a...

498
00:23:22,560 --> 00:23:24,927
Julie. Can I talk to you
a second?

499
00:23:25,080 --> 00:23:26,844
We gotta go.
I love you.

500
00:23:26,960 --> 00:23:27,961
I'd really like
to talk to you.

501
00:23:28,040 --> 00:23:29,485
But I really gotta go.

502
00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:31,165
Okay, fine. Just don't
forget your wrap.

503
00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:33,326
It's okay. I don't think
unedited

504
00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:34,481
Are you sure?

505
00:23:35,040 --> 00:23:37,281
Because we live in Chicago,
and it's chilly.

506
00:23:37,600 --> 00:23:38,965
I don't know
about other places,

507
00:23:39,120 --> 00:23:42,363
but it gets cold
in Illinois.

508
00:23:43,880 --> 00:23:46,042
It's not that cold tonight, so
I don't think I need it, okay?

509
00:23:46,120 --> 00:23:47,121
Okay, Julie, wait.

510
00:23:47,200 --> 00:23:49,521
So you'll call me when you get
to Austin's after prom? Right?

511
00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:50,681
Right.

512
00:23:51,000 --> 00:23:52,331
Okay-

513
00:23:52,640 --> 00:23:54,130
Okay.
I love you.

514
00:23:54,280 --> 00:23:55,884
Okay. I love you.

515
00:23:57,440 --> 00:23:58,441
Okay!

516
00:23:59,840 --> 00:24:01,729
Okay.

517
00:24:07,560 --> 00:24:09,164
This is so cool!

518
00:24:09,800 --> 00:24:11,040
om

519
00:24:11,120 --> 00:24:13,088
Blow it out!

520
00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:15,845
Chad, I, um, I saw you
do Pippin last year.

521
00:24:16,000 --> 00:24:17,161
That was really good.

522
00:24:17,800 --> 00:24:20,804
Yeah, you're a really good singer, man.
What are you doing this year?

523
00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:24,601
We're actually doing Arnold,
which is an all-male version of Annie-

524
00:24:25,440 --> 00:24:27,124
Caught you drinking!

525
00:24:27,280 --> 00:24:29,408
Just kidding, y'all.
I may look like a parent

526
00:24:29,560 --> 00:24:31,528
but I assure you,
I am no narc.

527
00:24:32,040 --> 00:24:33,610
Thank you, sir.

528
00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:37,570
Not done yet.
Name's Rudy.

529
00:24:37,800 --> 00:24:39,131
I did not go to my prom. No.

530
00:24:39,280 --> 00:24:42,648
My leg was crushed by a cement
truck so I could not dance but...

531
00:24:43,000 --> 00:24:44,923
So I've made it
my mission in life,

532
00:24:45,480 --> 00:24:48,404
my whole career, to make sure
that little kids like you

533
00:24:48,560 --> 00:24:50,403
have a wonderful night
to remember forever.

534
00:24:50,560 --> 00:24:54,281
So just sit back, relax,
and enjoy your prom night.

535
00:24:54,360 --> 00:24:56,567
Okay.

536
00:24:56,760 --> 00:24:58,364
Oh, fuck,
that was the turn! Fuck!

537
00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:02,161
Hey, Geese?

538
00:25:02,640 --> 00:25:04,165
You got any S.O.S. pads?

539
00:25:04,320 --> 00:25:07,608
I'm soaking those pans, but you burnt
the shit out of that mac and cheese.

540
00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:10,491
Sponge just isn't
gonna cut it.

541
00:25:10,720 --> 00:25:12,449
Thanks for helping clean up.

542
00:25:12,600 --> 00:25:14,250
Don't mention this one.

543
00:25:14,400 --> 00:25:17,449
I mean, Marcie brought
the baby home early and...

544
00:25:17,640 --> 00:25:21,770
I gotta keep busy. I gotta keep my
mind off of Kayla and "Connor."

545
00:25:22,760 --> 00:25:24,888
That's not the right way
to use those.

546
00:25:25,080 --> 00:25:28,243
'Cause his name
is actually Connor. So...

547
00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:31,411
It's okay.

548
00:25:31,560 --> 00:25:33,927
UCLA?
Uh-huh.

549
00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:35,126
I didn't mean to snoop,
but I'm...

550
00:25:35,200 --> 00:25:36,201
No, no. It's okay.

551
00:25:36,280 --> 00:25:37,406
I mean, I don't think
it's a real thing.

552
00:25:37,560 --> 00:25:39,767
She's not actually gonna go.

553
00:25:39,920 --> 00:25:42,605
I think she just applied
for fun. She didn't...

554
00:25:42,760 --> 00:25:43,921
Why, have you heard
differently?

555
00:25:44,080 --> 00:25:48,642
I would assume it's to go, but she very
well could have applied ironically.

556
00:25:48,800 --> 00:25:50,006
I mean,
you know millennials, right?

557
00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:51,605
Hmm.
Wherever she goes...

558
00:25:51,960 --> 00:25:53,564
You're gonna have a bunch
of time on your hands.

559
00:25:53,720 --> 00:25:55,848
You can figure out what you wanna
do for the back nine of your life.

560
00:25:55,920 --> 00:25:57,604
Uh-huh. Yeah.

561
00:25:58,880 --> 00:26:01,326
I think Julie
left her laptop open.

562
00:26:02,280 --> 00:26:03,611
Julie's doing
a lot of texting.

563
00:26:03,760 --> 00:26:05,330
Mmm-hmm.
ls everything okay?

564
00:26:06,080 --> 00:26:07,491
Maybe we should
check to see?

565
00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:09,051
Peace of mind.
Yeah.

566
00:26:13,520 --> 00:26:15,090
What the hell is that?

567
00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:16,890
I have no idea.

568
00:26:20,120 --> 00:26:21,281
What are you
still doing here?

569
00:26:21,440 --> 00:26:25,604
Hey, your, uh, mac and
cheese is messed up.

570
00:26:28,760 --> 00:26:30,762
Are you guys
snooping on your kids?

571
00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:32,126
That is not cool.

572
00:26:32,280 --> 00:26:34,487
No, it's not snooping
if the information shows up.

573
00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:35,766
That's exactly
what snooping is.

574
00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:37,763
No, it's like
the Patriot Act.

575
00:26:37,920 --> 00:26:38,921
Well, it's not like
the Patriot Act.

576
00:26:39,080 --> 00:26:40,081
It's like snooping.

577
00:26:40,240 --> 00:26:42,641
Okay. We don't know what
they're talking about, so...

578
00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:43,961
What?
Okay.

579
00:26:44,160 --> 00:26:46,288
Oh, is it like puzzles?
Ooh, I love puzzles.

580
00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:47,521
I just saw Inferno.

581
00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:48,727
Yeah, great.
What are they saying?

582
00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:51,531
Okay, so there's something
about an eggplant handshake.

583
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:52,601
Eggplant agreement.

584
00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:54,569
Yeah. They got an agreement
to make eggplant Parmesan.

585
00:26:54,720 --> 00:26:56,449
No, eggplants are dicks
in teenage emotive language.

586
00:26:56,600 --> 00:26:57,886
What? LISA: You know
what, that's true.

587
00:26:58,040 --> 00:27:00,691
Julie told me that the Moises have...
They all have secret meanings.

588
00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:02,285
Mmm-hmm.
So, like, trees are weed

589
00:27:02,440 --> 00:27:05,489
and snowflakes
are cocaine and

590
00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:07,286
that thing is "say queen."

591
00:27:07,440 --> 00:27:08,487
As queen!

592
00:27:08,600 --> 00:27:10,090
What the hell is that? You've
never heard of "say queen"?

593
00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:11,287
No.
All right, grandpa.

594
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:16,088
Hold on. Julie is making some kind
of a dick-related agreement here.

595
00:27:16,280 --> 00:27:18,248
Kayla is in on
the agreement.

596
00:27:18,400 --> 00:27:19,686
No fucking way.

597
00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:21,763
Okay, clown face.
What the fuck does that mean?

598
00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:24,726
That means
she's down to clown.

599
00:27:26,600 --> 00:27:27,601
- Okay.
- Three eggplants?

600
00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:29,524
And look at the drool coming
out of that smiley face.

601
00:27:29,600 --> 00:27:30,601
You wish that was drool.

602
00:27:30,680 --> 00:27:31,806
That's cum, my man.
Stand down!

603
00:27:32,040 --> 00:27:33,451
It is. Look, it's cum.
He's, like...

604
00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:36,444
This is sex if I've ever seen
it illustrated in emotive form.

605
00:27:36,600 --> 00:27:39,331
No, no, no. Maybe not. They're
best friends. They're just saying,

606
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:41,130
like, "You're okay with me.

607
00:27:41,280 --> 00:27:43,248
"You're okay to me. You're okay to
me." You say that to your friends?

608
00:27:43,400 --> 00:27:45,801
Whenever I see my friends, I go, "Hey!
You're okay with me."

609
00:27:45,960 --> 00:27:47,246
I don't use these!

610
00:27:47,400 --> 00:27:49,084
Hold on. Agreement hands,
agreement hands,

611
00:27:49,240 --> 00:27:51,208
agreement hands. This is a...
It's a sex agreement.

612
00:27:51,360 --> 00:27:53,488
They're making a sex pact.

613
00:27:53,640 --> 00:27:55,290
They're gonna lose their
virginity on prom night.

614
00:27:55,480 --> 00:27:56,891
That cannot be a sex pact.

615
00:27:57,040 --> 00:27:58,610
That? That is friendship.

616
00:27:58,760 --> 00:28:02,731
And that is the bond of friendship
that can never be broken.

617
00:28:02,880 --> 00:28:04,086
I mean, maybe.
Yeah.

618
00:28:04,280 --> 00:28:05,770
Oh! Just look, they wrote
"Sex Pact 2018."

619
00:28:05,920 --> 00:28:08,526
I fucking knew it!
I love puzzles.

620
00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:10,523
I told you guys.
Have you seen Inferno?

621
00:28:10,680 --> 00:28:12,205
Call your kid. Geese,
have you seen Inferno?

622
00:28:12,360 --> 00:28:13,566
Have you guys seen Inferno?

623
00:28:13,720 --> 00:28:15,563
I figured it out in two seconds.
Did you see Inferno?

624
00:28:15,720 --> 00:28:17,484
The guy jumps off the thing in
the beginning. He's got a virus.

625
00:28:17,640 --> 00:28:19,130
Have you seen Inferno
with Tom Hanks?

626
00:28:19,280 --> 00:28:20,281
Okay-

627
00:28:20,440 --> 00:28:21,851
Okay, she's not answering her phone.
Yeah, Kayla isn't either.

628
00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:23,525
Okay, what the heck
is happening?

629
00:28:23,720 --> 00:28:25,051
She's always been
honest with me.

630
00:28:25,200 --> 00:28:26,929
She's always
told me the truth,

631
00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:29,571
and now I'm just swimming
in a pool of lies.

632
00:28:29,720 --> 00:28:31,370
Okay. Here's what's
gonna happen.

633
00:28:31,560 --> 00:28:34,006
She's gonna have sex
with that Austin kid

634
00:28:34,160 --> 00:28:37,050
and then she's gonna think
that she has thunderflashes,

635
00:28:37,200 --> 00:28:39,202
which she does not
actually have,

636
00:28:39,400 --> 00:28:41,721
and then she's gonna drive
across country

637
00:28:41,880 --> 00:28:44,531
and follow him
and ruin her fucking life!

638
00:28:44,680 --> 00:28:47,411
Okay, I think that's a pretty big leap
to make when you read a couple...

639
00:28:47,560 --> 00:28:50,643
I have invested
every single piece of my being

640
00:28:50,800 --> 00:28:52,643
into preparing Kayla
for success, and now this?

641
00:28:53,160 --> 00:28:57,245
She is about to have sex with
some dipshit with a "man bun."

642
00:28:57,400 --> 00:28:59,801
You're not using those
in the right way.

643
00:28:59,960 --> 00:29:02,167
Hey, can we all come back
to "Planet Earth"?

644
00:29:02,320 --> 00:29:03,731
'Cause this is not
a big deal.

645
00:29:03,880 --> 00:29:06,406
They're teenage girls.
They have sex.

646
00:29:06,560 --> 00:29:09,404
Do you freak out when you see
a bee fucking a flower?

647
00:29:12,760 --> 00:29:13,761
I'm gonna stop her.

648
00:29:13,960 --> 00:29:14,961
I'm in.

649
00:29:15,040 --> 00:29:16,849
Let's cock block
those motherfuckers.

650
00:29:16,920 --> 00:29:18,809
Whoa...

651
00:29:18,880 --> 00:29:19,881
No, sir. Uh-uh.

652
00:29:19,960 --> 00:29:22,531
No, no, no, no. I promised Sam
the greatest night of her life

653
00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:24,250
and if you guys fuck up
your daughters' night,

654
00:29:24,400 --> 00:29:26,846
it's gonna fuck up my daughter's
night, whatshisname"not Cool"

655
00:29:27,000 --> 00:29:28,365
I don't give a fuck
what's cool with you.

656
00:29:28,520 --> 00:29:29,965
Let's go, Mitchell.
I'll drive.

657
00:29:30,160 --> 00:29:31,650
Hey! Hey, hey, wait!
No,no,no.

658
00:29:31,800 --> 00:29:33,211
You wanna go?

659
00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:34,805
You got to go through me.

660
00:29:35,040 --> 00:29:37,281
Oh, Jesus. Okay,
you called my bluff. Wait.

661
00:29:37,760 --> 00:29:38,761
Wait! Hey!

662
00:29:38,920 --> 00:29:41,048
Get off! Get off of me!
Get off! HUNTER: Hey! Hey!

663
00:29:41,200 --> 00:29:42,486
Not cool!

664
00:29:42,640 --> 00:29:43,880
This is "not cool"!

665
00:29:44,040 --> 00:29:46,441
Hey! What's the plan?
This is stupid.

666
00:29:50,120 --> 00:29:51,167
Fuck off.

667
00:29:51,720 --> 00:29:52,721
I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.

668
00:29:52,800 --> 00:29:53,926
What the fuck are you doing?

669
00:29:54,080 --> 00:29:56,731
I just need to talk to my
daughter for five minutes.

670
00:29:56,880 --> 00:29:57,881
Get out of the car!

671
00:29:57,960 --> 00:29:58,961
You get out.

672
00:29:59,040 --> 00:30:00,041
You get out!
You get out!

673
00:30:00,120 --> 00:30:01,121
Stop saying what I'm saying!

674
00:30:01,200 --> 00:30:03,202
Stop saying what I'm saying.
Stop saying what I'm saying!

675
00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:04,606
Stop! Okay. Listen, listen.
Hey!

676
00:30:04,760 --> 00:30:06,250
Okay, everyone calm down,
calm down.

677
00:30:07,080 --> 00:30:08,320
The window!
No, the window!

678
00:30:09,360 --> 00:30:10,486
Hey! What the fuck! No!

679
00:30:14,440 --> 00:30:15,726
Damn, these are new shorts!

680
00:30:15,800 --> 00:30:16,801
Truce, truce!

681
00:30:16,880 --> 00:30:18,928
Truce, truce, truce.

682
00:30:20,240 --> 00:30:21,765
I'm so sorry!
I'm so sorry!

683
00:30:21,880 --> 00:30:23,450
Oh, my fucking God!

684
00:30:23,520 --> 00:30:24,521
Uh...

685
00:30:25,520 --> 00:30:26,521
I'm sorry, man.

686
00:30:26,600 --> 00:30:29,285
It's not gonna work.
You're not Schwarzenegger!

687
00:30:31,400 --> 00:30:32,925
How is that possible?

688
00:30:33,080 --> 00:30:34,889
How is that possible?
Oh, shit!

689
00:30:35,400 --> 00:30:36,561
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

690
00:30:36,720 --> 00:30:37,801
My balls! My balls!

691
00:30:38,280 --> 00:30:39,281
Your ass is so...

692
00:30:41,960 --> 00:30:43,450
Hey! Hey! Not cool!

693
00:30:43,520 --> 00:30:45,409
Ah! You're bullying me!

694
00:30:45,560 --> 00:30:48,404
This is bullying!
What you're doing is wrong!

695
00:30:49,680 --> 00:30:52,047
You know your daughter's
in this stupid sex pact, too.

696
00:30:52,240 --> 00:30:53,730
Yeah, and she's not gonna
do anything about it, okay?

697
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:55,928
Like you would know
what your daughter's gonna do.

698
00:30:56,400 --> 00:30:58,402
Okay, first of all, ouch!

699
00:30:58,560 --> 00:31:01,803
Second of all, I know nothing is
gonna happen with Sam because...

700
00:31:02,240 --> 00:31:03,526
Because she's gay.

701
00:31:04,320 --> 00:31:06,322
Really? Did she come out
to you?

702
00:31:06,480 --> 00:31:08,960
No, of course not.
She barely speaks to me.

703
00:31:09,120 --> 00:31:10,884
Then how do you know?
Because, bro,

704
00:31:11,040 --> 00:31:13,691
I'm her dad. And there's
just some things you know.

705
00:31:13,840 --> 00:31:16,286
Chad is nothing.
He's like a beard.

706
00:31:16,440 --> 00:31:19,569
Or whatever a lesbian beard is.
A jerkin?

707
00:31:19,720 --> 00:31:20,721
I don't know. The point is,

708
00:31:20,840 --> 00:31:22,922
I guarantee you
they don't even kiss, okay?

709
00:31:23,280 --> 00:31:24,281
I'm not worried about that.

710
00:31:24,480 --> 00:31:26,528
I'm worried about you two
dicks fucking up her night.

711
00:31:26,680 --> 00:31:28,648
Okay, well, what you don't
understand is that

712
00:31:28,800 --> 00:31:31,246
sex can be very confusing
for young girls,

713
00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:34,165
and make them say things and do
things that they might regret.

714
00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:35,720
Like dropping out of college

715
00:31:35,880 --> 00:31:38,121
to follow around
the Dave Matthews Band

716
00:31:38,280 --> 00:31:41,204
with a guy they think they love who
then winds up getting them pregnant

717
00:31:41,360 --> 00:31:42,771
and then leaving them

718
00:31:42,960 --> 00:31:47,568
for the girl who makes grilled cheese
sandwiches with hash aioli on them.

719
00:31:48,880 --> 00:31:52,851
Yeah, that is
a extremely specific scenario

720
00:31:53,000 --> 00:31:54,650
and that won't happen
to Julie.

721
00:31:54,800 --> 00:31:57,565
Dave's not even touring right now.
He's taking time off for fatherhood.

722
00:31:57,720 --> 00:31:59,290
It was me, you idiot.

723
00:31:59,840 --> 00:32:01,285
Me. That happened to me.

724
00:32:01,920 --> 00:32:02,921
Yeah.

725
00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:16,849
You weren't ready!
Okay, one more.

726
00:32:16,920 --> 00:32:17,921
Smile.

727
00:32:18,720 --> 00:32:19,721
I closed my eye.

728
00:32:20,360 --> 00:32:21,850
Oh, my God!

729
00:32:22,040 --> 00:32:24,486
You guys!
This is our song!

730
00:32:24,640 --> 00:32:26,244
Do you remember when we
got snowed in at Sam's

731
00:32:26,400 --> 00:32:28,482
and we played this like
over and over? Yes!

732
00:32:28,640 --> 00:32:30,608
We have to dance!
This is our jam!

733
00:32:44,840 --> 00:32:45,841
Hey!
Hey!

734
00:32:45,920 --> 00:32:47,160
Hey! I want a drink.

735
00:32:47,240 --> 00:32:48,241
Okay, yeah, let's go get one.

736
00:32:48,360 --> 00:32:50,328
No,no,no,no.
Like, a drink.

737
00:32:50,480 --> 00:32:52,050
Oh, you want a drink-drink.
Yeah.

738
00:32:52,240 --> 00:32:54,083
Okay, let me call my guy.

739
00:32:54,280 --> 00:32:55,281
Hello, Mr. Drink Drink.

740
00:32:55,960 --> 00:32:56,961
Let's go get fucked up!

741
00:32:57,160 --> 00:32:58,161
Okay-

742
00:32:58,560 --> 00:33:00,449
Kayla, Kayla! Ah.

743
00:33:11,760 --> 00:33:13,171
Hey,Chad!

744
00:33:13,320 --> 00:33:15,004
I'm gonna go
get, uh, some dessert.

745
00:33:15,160 --> 00:33:16,491
Get me two!

746
00:33:26,720 --> 00:33:29,451
Hey, Angelica,
it's a nice cape.

747
00:33:29,600 --> 00:33:30,840
Uh, hey, Sam,

748
00:33:31,000 --> 00:33:32,126
thank you.

749
00:33:35,520 --> 00:33:40,003
Um, yeah, it's a Galadriel cape that I
made a couple months ago for Lord Con.

750
00:33:40,200 --> 00:33:41,247
Figured I could wear it again.

751
00:33:41,400 --> 00:33:44,210
Not too much overlap
on the guest list.

752
00:33:46,400 --> 00:33:47,561
Yeah. Totally.

753
00:33:49,840 --> 00:33:51,285
Who'd you come here with?

754
00:33:51,360 --> 00:33:53,283
Um... Just my friends.

755
00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:55,968
Lauren and I broke up.

756
00:33:57,040 --> 00:33:58,166
Oh!

757
00:33:58,240 --> 00:34:00,242
No hard feelings though.

758
00:34:00,320 --> 00:34:03,369
Um, she's still
a little confused.

759
00:34:04,800 --> 00:34:06,802
How do you think one becomes

760
00:34:07,520 --> 00:34:10,251
not confused?

761
00:34:11,160 --> 00:34:14,130
It's probably different
for everyone.

762
00:34:14,320 --> 00:34:17,529
But for me, when I kissed Brad
Malinowski, I started to suspect it,

763
00:34:17,680 --> 00:34:21,810
northeastward when I touched Dash
Wittgenstein’s dick, I was like,

764
00:34:21,960 --> 00:34:24,566
"Fuck no." It was like
holding a dead snake.

765
00:34:24,920 --> 00:34:25,921
Hmm.

766
00:34:28,120 --> 00:34:30,726
But I guess you never know
until you try.

767
00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:40,770
Uh, before I do
drink this, though,

768
00:34:40,920 --> 00:34:42,160
I just wanna let you know

769
00:34:42,320 --> 00:34:44,721
that I am fully planning
on having sex tonight.

770
00:34:46,200 --> 00:34:47,725
With... With you.

771
00:34:48,160 --> 00:34:50,766
Yeah, I mean, wherever
the wind blows us.

772
00:34:51,120 --> 00:34:52,849
Well, the Wind's gonna
blow us there.

773
00:34:53,200 --> 00:34:54,611
Wherever the night
takes us.

774
00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:57,047
It's gonna take your penis
into my vagina.

775
00:34:57,240 --> 00:35:00,005
Okay. Uh... You know,
if the universe wills it.

776
00:35:00,200 --> 00:35:02,567
And the universe
will will it.

777
00:35:04,200 --> 00:35:06,806
Thanks for letting me know.
guess.

778
00:35:08,360 --> 00:35:09,646
Uh,yeah.

779
00:35:09,760 --> 00:35:11,125
Oh, my God!
I warned you.

780
00:35:11,280 --> 00:35:12,805
This is what gin tastes like?
No, no.

781
00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:15,321
I've heard that gin sucks and this sucks.
No, it's...

782
00:35:16,000 --> 00:35:18,367
I made it. Um...
Oh.

783
00:35:18,600 --> 00:35:20,682
This is so dumb. Okay?

784
00:35:20,840 --> 00:35:23,286
Yeah, our kids are gonna hate us
because you're gonna humiliate them.

785
00:35:23,440 --> 00:35:26,125
I'm not gonna humiliate Julie.
We're best friends.

786
00:35:26,280 --> 00:35:27,281
I'm the cool mom.

787
00:35:27,360 --> 00:35:29,044
Hunter, don't make me
sit on your balls again.

788
00:35:29,200 --> 00:35:31,362
Stop, stop, stop it,
stop, stop!

789
00:35:31,560 --> 00:35:34,166
This is how they're gonna
be remembered in high school,

790
00:35:34,360 --> 00:35:36,931
as the weirdos whose parents
dragged them out of prom

791
00:35:37,080 --> 00:35:38,650
because they were afraid
of their sexuality.

792
00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:41,924
It's not something that should be
feared, it should be celebrated.

793
00:35:43,360 --> 00:35:46,011
And... And we have to empower
these young women.

794
00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:48,646
I mean, what year
is it, guys? It's 2018.

795
00:35:50,360 --> 00:35:52,089
- Jesus Christ!
- Oh, gross.

796
00:35:52,240 --> 00:35:53,241
Okay, you know what?

797
00:35:53,360 --> 00:35:54,725
That's an unfortunate
coincidence.

798
00:35:54,920 --> 00:35:56,160
Get a fucking room!

799
00:36:04,960 --> 00:36:06,405
Let's take a picture!

800
00:36:06,600 --> 00:36:08,284
Kayla! Let's take a picture
right now.

801
00:36:08,440 --> 00:36:10,169
Okay, cool!

802
00:36:10,320 --> 00:36:11,321
Cheese!

803
00:36:11,720 --> 00:36:13,961
Oh, my God, my mom called
me, like, 15 times.

804
00:36:14,120 --> 00:36:15,804
She's crazy!
Nope.

805
00:36:15,960 --> 00:36:16,961
No. That's a no.
That's kind of funny.

806
00:36:17,080 --> 00:36:19,401
Boom! Airplane mode.
No.

807
00:36:19,560 --> 00:36:21,847
Yeah. We're flying
the friendly skies now.

808
00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:23,286
Yeah, until she freaks out.

809
00:36:23,440 --> 00:36:24,726
Look, can we please
get out of here?

810
00:36:24,880 --> 00:36:26,484
No! We can't go right now.

811
00:36:26,640 --> 00:36:28,529
They haven't even played
me and Austin's song yet.

812
00:36:28,680 --> 00:36:29,681
How are we gonna
get in the mood?

813
00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:31,211
I don't know,
light your Walgreens candle.

814
00:36:31,320 --> 00:36:32,321
That's later.

815
00:36:32,400 --> 00:36:35,085
Don't you want... Look, look.
Jake Donahue is just warming up.

816
00:36:36,360 --> 00:36:38,442
Don't you wanna see him break
dance and probably hurt himself?

817
00:36:38,600 --> 00:36:40,090
- No. I don't.
- It's gonna be so good.

818
00:36:40,240 --> 00:36:42,641
Do you remember
at the Sadie Hawkins Dance

819
00:36:42,840 --> 00:36:45,810
when he tried to do the worm and he
fell and broke his two front teeth?

820
00:36:45,960 --> 00:36:47,121
Yeah, he had to go to the hospital.
I have pictures.

821
00:36:47,280 --> 00:36:49,601
It was great.
And this is gonna be better!

822
00:36:49,680 --> 00:36:50,681
No,no,no.
So we're staying.

823
00:36:50,760 --> 00:36:52,967
No! Julie, Julie. I promise

824
00:36:53,120 --> 00:36:55,122
that you're gonna dance to your
song with your boyfriend tonight.

825
00:36:55,280 --> 00:36:56,964
This place is dying, okay?

826
00:36:57,120 --> 00:36:58,485
We gotta get out of here.

827
00:36:58,640 --> 00:36:59,641
Okay, fine.

828
00:36:59,960 --> 00:37:01,883
Okay, cool, let's go.

829
00:37:02,800 --> 00:37:04,006
We're going
to the lake house!

830
00:37:04,200 --> 00:37:06,328
I'm not sure
that this was worth $85.

831
00:37:06,480 --> 00:37:07,970
Where's Chad?

832
00:37:08,040 --> 00:37:09,087
What?

833
00:37:09,160 --> 00:37:10,810
Oh, he's probably
out on the dance floor.

834
00:37:10,960 --> 00:37:12,644
I'm gonna go find him
and meet you guys outside.

835
00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:13,801
All right.

836
00:37:29,920 --> 00:37:30,921
The fuck?

837
00:37:34,960 --> 00:37:36,610
Smirking little piece of shit.

838
00:37:36,840 --> 00:37:38,569
Top knot. Top knot.
Let's get him.

839
00:37:38,720 --> 00:37:40,484
Yeah, you guys go do that.

840
00:37:40,640 --> 00:37:42,608
I'm gonna get some punch.

841
00:37:43,520 --> 00:37:45,363
All right, asshole, what'd
you do with my daughter?

842
00:37:45,960 --> 00:37:48,361
Two of you guys have the same
shitty haircut? Hey!

843
00:37:48,520 --> 00:37:50,443
Look at me.
My hair's too long.

844
00:37:51,320 --> 00:37:54,324
Hey! You can't go around
assaulting children.

845
00:37:54,480 --> 00:37:55,811
You have to blend in

846
00:37:56,320 --> 00:37:58,129
if you want
some information, okay?

847
00:37:58,280 --> 00:38:02,001
So just... Just be cool. God!

848
00:38:02,160 --> 00:38:03,366
Okay-

849
00:38:04,360 --> 00:38:05,521
Julie?

850
00:38:06,520 --> 00:38:07,726
Julie?

851
00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:15,969
Prom night, huh?

852
00:38:16,600 --> 00:38:17,681
What?

853
00:38:18,920 --> 00:38:21,002
Just special night.

854
00:38:27,480 --> 00:38:28,686
Gotta try.

855
00:38:35,080 --> 00:38:36,206
Chad?
Yeah?

856
00:38:55,320 --> 00:38:57,049
This is my moment.

857
00:39:14,200 --> 00:39:15,725
You ruined my moment!

858
00:39:15,880 --> 00:39:17,041
Fuck your moment.

859
00:39:18,400 --> 00:39:19,401
What happened
back there?

860
00:39:19,480 --> 00:39:22,723
Happenstance my daughter was kissing
Chad even though she hated it...

861
00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:25,651
And I've been dragged in this
situation by you two fucking idiots!

862
00:39:25,840 --> 00:39:26,841
Just ignore him.
Great idea.

863
00:39:26,960 --> 00:39:27,961
We're gonna go
to Austin's house.

864
00:39:28,040 --> 00:39:29,849
Julie said that's where the after-party
is and we'll get 'em there.

865
00:39:30,000 --> 00:39:31,001
And that sounds
like a plan.

866
00:39:31,160 --> 00:39:32,810
Hey, how dare you ignore me.

867
00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:35,361
We are in this situation because
you two raised a couple of bigots

868
00:39:35,560 --> 00:39:38,564
who have shamed my daughter into
losing her virginity to the wrong sex.

869
00:39:38,720 --> 00:39:40,006
Shame!

870
00:39:40,160 --> 00:39:43,130
My daughter is not a bigot.

871
00:39:43,200 --> 00:39:45,851
We go to all of the marches.

872
00:39:46,000 --> 00:39:49,163
We went to the Tax Day March
and nobody goes to that shit.

873
00:39:49,360 --> 00:39:50,850
Nobody!
Ignore him.

874
00:39:51,000 --> 00:39:52,365
It's hard.
Yeah, it is hard.

875
00:39:52,520 --> 00:39:53,521
'Cause I don't quit.

876
00:39:53,720 --> 00:39:54,960
And now I have
to go rescue Sam

877
00:39:55,160 --> 00:39:57,162
because she is scared
and confused

878
00:39:57,320 --> 00:40:00,563
and I know what it's like to be ostracized
by society for your sexual preferences.

879
00:40:00,720 --> 00:40:04,167
Sleeping with women that aren't your
wife isn't a sexual preference.

880
00:40:04,320 --> 00:40:06,482
No, it is! I prefer them.

881
00:40:06,560 --> 00:40:08,324
How parents can let their kids

882
00:40:08,400 --> 00:40:09,606
play music this loud?

883
00:40:10,160 --> 00:40:11,969
We all share this planet.

884
00:40:12,120 --> 00:40:13,804
This is how loud
I listen to my music, gawd.

885
00:40:13,960 --> 00:40:15,928
Probably won't even be
able to hear us.

886
00:40:16,600 --> 00:40:18,568
It's so dark in there.

887
00:40:18,680 --> 00:40:22,048
They could be in the backyard playing
two-on-two hoops. I don't know.

888
00:40:23,160 --> 00:40:24,321
Oh. I found a big window.

889
00:40:25,520 --> 00:40:26,521
No, no, don't,
don't, don't.

890
00:40:26,640 --> 00:40:29,325
Trust me. Do not look
in that window.

891
00:40:29,480 --> 00:40:30,845
What? Look at me.
Do not look in this window.

892
00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:32,001
Do not look
in this fucking window!

893
00:40:35,360 --> 00:40:36,885
Julie's red dress!
Shit!

894
00:40:38,160 --> 00:40:40,811
Shit! Oh, God.

895
00:40:42,960 --> 00:40:44,689
I know this must be
tough for you.

896
00:40:44,840 --> 00:40:46,001
I mean, if...

897
00:40:46,160 --> 00:40:48,242
Hell, if that was Kayla
in there, I'd...

898
00:40:49,360 --> 00:40:51,010
I'd kill myself.
Nope.

899
00:40:51,160 --> 00:40:53,162
That's the wrong thing
to fucking say right now.

900
00:40:53,480 --> 00:40:55,244
Stop them. Stop it!

901
00:40:55,400 --> 00:40:56,401
I can't... Wait.

902
00:40:57,440 --> 00:40:59,408
Hey! It's not Julie.

903
00:40:59,480 --> 00:41:00,527
It's not Julie.

904
00:41:00,600 --> 00:41:02,682
What?

905
00:41:02,760 --> 00:41:04,967
Shit!
It's Austin's parents.

906
00:41:05,120 --> 00:41:06,246
Good for them.

907
00:41:06,440 --> 00:41:07,487
Really going at it.

908
00:41:07,640 --> 00:41:10,371
Always wanted to do this. I've always
wanted to watch people have sex.

909
00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:12,249
Oh, my God,
he's yanking her hair.

910
00:41:12,320 --> 00:41:13,810
Ow. That looks like it hurts.

911
00:41:13,960 --> 00:41:15,928
Yeah, we shouldn't
be looking, man. Come on.

912
00:41:16,080 --> 00:41:18,162
She runs the risk
of, like, dislocating her hip.

913
00:41:18,320 --> 00:41:19,924
Hey, Mitchell. You're being
a fucking perv, dude.

914
00:41:20,120 --> 00:41:21,690
Don't look.

915
00:41:27,760 --> 00:41:29,125
What happened?

916
00:41:29,840 --> 00:41:31,285
We locked eyes
and then he finished.

917
00:41:31,440 --> 00:41:33,727
That means his load
is on your soul for eternity.

918
00:41:33,840 --> 00:41:34,841
Holy shit!

919
00:41:34,920 --> 00:41:35,921
Oh, shit, he's coming.

920
00:41:37,200 --> 00:41:38,884
I'll pretend I'm a plant.

921
00:41:42,520 --> 00:41:43,760
Mitchell?
What are you doing?

922
00:41:43,880 --> 00:41:45,530
Lisa?
Hey,Ron!

923
00:41:45,960 --> 00:41:47,485
What are you guys
doing out here?

924
00:41:47,640 --> 00:41:48,641
Hi!

925
00:41:48,720 --> 00:41:50,802
Hey!
What a nice surprise!

926
00:41:50,960 --> 00:41:53,486
We thought the kids were here. We
didn't realize you guys were here.

927
00:41:53,840 --> 00:41:57,287
Oh, Cathy and I were just having
a little prom night role-play.

928
00:41:57,440 --> 00:41:59,761
You know, to keep the sex life alive.
Prom night!

929
00:41:59,920 --> 00:42:02,287
Wherever are the kids? Um, do
you know where the kids are?

930
00:42:02,440 --> 00:42:05,125
The kids are at
Kyler Montenegro’s lake house.

931
00:42:05,200 --> 00:42:06,201
How do you know that?

932
00:42:06,280 --> 00:42:08,009
Because Austin told us.
Yeah.

933
00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:11,204
He's tested me, like,
19 times tonight.

934
00:42:11,320 --> 00:42:13,322
Ugh. Oh, my God. Yeah, we
tell each other everything.

935
00:42:13,480 --> 00:42:14,561
It's unbelievable.

936
00:42:14,760 --> 00:42:15,761
He knows about prom night.

937
00:42:15,880 --> 00:42:17,325
Well, you know.
I'm sorry, you...

938
00:42:17,480 --> 00:42:19,960
You tell your son about your
sex games with your wife?

939
00:42:20,120 --> 00:42:21,121
Uh-huh. Yeah.

940
00:42:22,000 --> 00:42:24,287
Can't do that. There's a line.
Yeah, it's weird.

941
00:42:24,360 --> 00:42:25,361
It's... It's weird.

942
00:42:25,520 --> 00:42:27,363
We have a very
open family here.

943
00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:29,005
Yes, we do.
We don't hide anything.

944
00:42:29,160 --> 00:42:30,446
You know what,
what is Kyler's address?

945
00:42:30,520 --> 00:42:35,128
Okay, listen, I feel like I
can't betray Austin's confidence in me

946
00:42:35,320 --> 00:42:38,802
and frankly if Julie wanted to
tell you where the house was,

947
00:42:38,880 --> 00:42:39,961
she would've told you.

948
00:42:40,040 --> 00:42:42,361
LBJ-uh. Algol.Honk,honkie.
Uh,hub,hub.

949
00:42:42,760 --> 00:42:43,841
Give us the address.

950
00:42:44,160 --> 00:42:46,003
Or my giant friend's gonna
tear your husband's dick off.

951
00:42:46,080 --> 00:42:47,161
Yeah.

952
00:42:47,240 --> 00:42:48,241
No, I'm not.

953
00:42:48,320 --> 00:42:49,321
No, I'm not.
Excuse me?

954
00:42:49,440 --> 00:42:52,205
No, no, no. That's...
That's good.

955
00:42:52,360 --> 00:42:54,169
And, uh, sorry to interrupt
your evening.

956
00:42:54,320 --> 00:42:56,448
I hope you guys enjoy
the rest of your love-making.

957
00:42:56,920 --> 00:42:58,046
- Ah, fuck!
- Come on, man.

958
00:42:58,160 --> 00:42:59,161
- What was that about?
- What?

959
00:42:59,240 --> 00:43:01,049
Hey, man, thank you for
killing my daughter's hymen.

960
00:43:01,200 --> 00:43:03,089
I don't think so.
Kyler Montenegro’s lake house?

961
00:43:03,240 --> 00:43:04,241
Marcie did the bathroom.

962
00:43:04,400 --> 00:43:06,880
She's gonna know the address.
So let's just go.

963
00:43:07,040 --> 00:43:08,690
All right, dope.
Dope.

964
00:43:10,840 --> 00:43:12,285
Oh, my eyes!
Yeah!

965
00:43:13,200 --> 00:43:14,531
Okay, come on in now.

966
00:43:14,680 --> 00:43:16,842
It's all fun and games
until there's a decapitation.

967
00:43:17,000 --> 00:43:19,321
I don't need any more
dead girls on my conscience.

968
00:43:19,480 --> 00:43:20,686
I'm sorry, Rudy!

969
00:43:20,840 --> 00:43:24,128
We just had to check that off
the old prom bucket list.

970
00:43:24,600 --> 00:43:26,523
0, my God! Sam!

971
00:43:26,680 --> 00:43:27,886
Come here. Yeah!
Move, Chad!

972
00:43:28,080 --> 00:43:30,082
Chad, you want a drink?
No.

973
00:43:30,240 --> 00:43:31,969
What you got there?

974
00:43:32,120 --> 00:43:35,647
This is a very, very special reduced
hash oil of my own invention.

975
00:43:35,840 --> 00:43:38,002
It has rosemary essence
for blood flow,

976
00:43:38,160 --> 00:43:41,243
a cur cumin extract from
turmeric to reduce inflammation.

977
00:43:41,400 --> 00:43:43,402
And it gets you super baked.

978
00:43:43,480 --> 00:43:47,530
All right! Let's do it.
Do I just suck?

979
00:43:47,680 --> 00:43:49,842
Yeah, you press the button and
you take, like, a little puff.

980
00:43:50,000 --> 00:43:53,971
Or a really, really
big one. Okay.

981
00:43:54,120 --> 00:43:56,407
And then you just hold it
for, like, a beat.

982
00:43:56,560 --> 00:43:59,131
You guys know that Tanner Dunn's
parents rented out a whole floor

983
00:43:59,320 --> 00:44:01,402
of the Park West Hotel
for an after-party?

984
00:44:01,560 --> 00:44:02,721
What?

985
00:44:02,800 --> 00:44:04,882
Um... Yeah...
He, uh...

986
00:44:05,040 --> 00:44:07,088
I guess they're super loaded and
they're still proud of him,

987
00:44:07,240 --> 00:44:09,208
even though it took him, like,
six years to graduate.

988
00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:12,807
I remember him. He got to miss
school when his kid was born.

989
00:44:13,000 --> 00:44:14,001
Yeah, that guy.

990
00:44:14,560 --> 00:44:15,846
You should definitely
let it go now.

991
00:44:19,120 --> 00:44:20,326
Holy shit.

992
00:44:20,480 --> 00:44:24,451
Oh, yeah. I can run a six-minute mile.
My lung capacity is legit.

993
00:44:24,640 --> 00:44:26,449
No!
One more selfish.

994
00:44:26,640 --> 00:44:28,005
And this time let's pose
like Kenya.

995
00:44:28,160 --> 00:44:29,286
No!Boo!

996
00:44:29,440 --> 00:44:31,363
Yes.
You take too many pictures.

997
00:44:31,480 --> 00:44:33,528
They don't look like him.

998
00:44:34,080 --> 00:44:36,560
It's just a bunch of
paint samples and swatches.

999
00:44:36,720 --> 00:44:38,131
Hunter! Quiet!

1000
00:44:38,320 --> 00:44:39,367
Why do I have to be quiet?

1001
00:44:39,520 --> 00:44:41,443
Shit would not fly
if Marcie found out.

1002
00:44:41,600 --> 00:44:42,726
Who wears the pants
in this house, gawd?

1003
00:44:42,880 --> 00:44:43,881
- I do.
- Oh!

1004
00:44:47,880 --> 00:44:49,245
Mmm.

1005
00:44:49,320 --> 00:44:52,961
This is soy creamer, are you sure?
It's pretty freaking rich.

1006
00:44:53,120 --> 00:44:54,167
This is so messed up.

1007
00:44:54,320 --> 00:44:57,005
Who are you to get involved
in our daughter's sex life?

1008
00:44:57,160 --> 00:44:59,242
Honey, I was just trying...
No, don't "honey" me.

1009
00:44:59,400 --> 00:45:01,801
Did your dad try to stop you
when you lost your virginity?

1010
00:45:01,960 --> 00:45:02,961
That's totally different.

1011
00:45:03,080 --> 00:45:04,684
It is not different.
It's a double standard.

1012
00:45:04,840 --> 00:45:07,889
Oh, when a guy loses his virginity,
it's no big deal, it's celebrated,

1013
00:45:08,040 --> 00:45:10,646
but if a girl does, it's some
sort of big loss of innocence?

1014
00:45:10,800 --> 00:45:12,245
- Yes!
- But come on, you guys,

1015
00:45:12,400 --> 00:45:13,640
it's the same damn thing.

1016
00:45:13,720 --> 00:45:17,611
Marcie!
Stop talking.

1017
00:45:17,760 --> 00:45:20,570
Just give us the address.
Just give us the address.

1018
00:45:20,880 --> 00:45:23,690
Honestly, Lisa, I can't
believe you're on their side.

1019
00:45:23,840 --> 00:45:27,162
"Side"? This is not
some philosophical debate.

1020
00:45:27,320 --> 00:45:30,563
We're trying to stop our daughters
from some kind of sex pact

1021
00:45:30,720 --> 00:45:33,530
that they've planned and not
thought through all the way.

1022
00:45:33,680 --> 00:45:34,761
That is such bullshit.

1023
00:45:35,320 --> 00:45:36,560
How do you expect society

1024
00:45:36,720 --> 00:45:39,291
to treat women as if they're equal
when their own parents won't?

1025
00:45:39,440 --> 00:45:41,283
I don't know about that.

1026
00:45:41,440 --> 00:45:44,728
I'll deal with society tomorrow. Right
now I'm thinking about my daughter.

1027
00:45:44,880 --> 00:45:47,326
Well, that's convenient.
Yeah. You know what?

1028
00:45:47,480 --> 00:45:48,766
Go ahead
and be part of the group

1029
00:45:48,920 --> 00:45:52,367
that perceives women as little damsels
in distress that need saving.

1030
00:45:52,560 --> 00:45:54,164
Who cares about us
not getting paid as much

1031
00:45:54,320 --> 00:45:56,527
or not having control
of our own bodies?

1032
00:45:56,680 --> 00:46:00,162
Can you please not talk to me like I'm
someone who bombs abortion clinics?

1033
00:46:00,360 --> 00:46:02,362
I think we're a little off-topic.
We need the address.

1034
00:46:02,520 --> 00:46:03,567
I just can't believe

1035
00:46:03,760 --> 00:46:06,923
that you think Julie shouldn't
be free to explore her sexuality

1036
00:46:07,080 --> 00:46:08,730
in the same way
that boys are.

1037
00:46:08,880 --> 00:46:12,248
Girls and boys
are very different.

1038
00:46:12,400 --> 00:46:14,607
Guys will take
whatever in front of them.

1039
00:46:15,560 --> 00:46:17,085
We have these
feelings and then

1040
00:46:17,240 --> 00:46:21,370
your parents won't
let you see the man.

1041
00:46:21,520 --> 00:46:23,602
And then he just writes
a lot of letters

1042
00:46:23,800 --> 00:46:27,009
but you don't get them because
your mom doesn't give them to you

1043
00:46:27,160 --> 00:46:29,640
and then it starts raining
really hard

1044
00:46:29,800 --> 00:46:31,848
because he built
a house for you.

1045
00:46:33,640 --> 00:46:35,642
And then, it's...

1046
00:46:36,080 --> 00:46:37,366
Mitchell, did you get
the address?

1047
00:46:37,480 --> 00:46:38,481
- Yup!
- What?

1048
00:46:38,560 --> 00:46:39,561
I'm really sorry.
I'll call you tomorrow.

1049
00:46:39,720 --> 00:46:41,449
I'm just really stressed out.
It was so good to see you.

1050
00:46:41,600 --> 00:46:43,170
Was that The Notebook?

1051
00:46:43,360 --> 00:46:45,966
Fucking fuck off, Hunter!
God damn it! Mitchell!

1052
00:46:46,120 --> 00:46:47,770
I love you, I'm doing this
for our daughter, I'll be home late!

1053
00:46:47,920 --> 00:46:49,001
Shit!

1054
00:46:51,800 --> 00:46:53,928
To the loss of our innocence.

1055
00:46:54,040 --> 00:46:55,644
Shoo!

1056
00:46:58,640 --> 00:46:59,641
Oh!

1057
00:47:00,360 --> 00:47:01,361
Come on!

1058
00:47:01,760 --> 00:47:04,127
You guys!
This is the best night!

1059
00:47:04,280 --> 00:47:07,124
I am so drunk, super high

1060
00:47:07,280 --> 00:47:10,921
and Connor has a little
something-something that I feel

1061
00:47:11,080 --> 00:47:12,161
I need to go check out.

1062
00:47:12,320 --> 00:47:14,607
All right.
It's fuck o'clock.

1063
00:47:14,760 --> 00:47:16,569
- No way. You, too?
- Yep.

1064
00:47:18,240 --> 00:47:20,811
These are macrons...
Ooh!

1065
00:47:20,880 --> 00:47:24,168
With a very special concoction
of mine that I call Wavy Davy.

1066
00:47:24,360 --> 00:47:27,011
So it's MT that I get
from the dark web.

1067
00:47:27,160 --> 00:47:29,083
And then there's
a little tiny bit of Xanax

1068
00:47:29,280 --> 00:47:31,806
to just kind of take the edge
off, you know. It's pretty tight.

1069
00:47:31,960 --> 00:47:33,564
Sounds pretty tight.

1070
00:47:33,720 --> 00:47:35,290
And then I bake it
into a white chocolate macron

1071
00:47:35,440 --> 00:47:37,090
bandits,He,
a raspberry filling

1072
00:47:37,240 --> 00:47:41,006
that's both light and fluffy but
also very flavorful and satisfying.

1073
00:47:41,920 --> 00:47:42,967
Are you ready?

1074
00:47:43,040 --> 00:47:45,168
Uh, yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, let's do it.

1075
00:47:45,320 --> 00:47:47,846
Okay. Let's go.

1076
00:47:49,880 --> 00:47:51,166
Mmm.

1077
00:47:51,240 --> 00:47:52,730
It's yum.

1078
00:47:52,800 --> 00:47:53,847
Mmm.

1079
00:47:58,400 --> 00:47:59,731
So what do we do?
We just walk in

1080
00:47:59,880 --> 00:48:01,450
and flick the lights on and
off until the kids come?

1081
00:48:01,600 --> 00:48:04,490
Just act cool and young,
and maybe we'll just slip in.

1082
00:48:04,600 --> 00:48:05,886
Mitchell, unstuck your shirt.

1083
00:48:06,040 --> 00:48:07,963
No, it's not that kind of shirt.
It looks stupid tuckered.

1084
00:48:08,120 --> 00:48:10,248
Unhook your shirt. You look
like a youth minister.

1085
00:48:10,400 --> 00:48:11,731
Unstuck your fucking shirt, man.
We're trying to look cool.

1086
00:48:11,880 --> 00:48:12,881
All right!

1087
00:48:12,960 --> 00:48:14,928
Whoa. Oh, Sorry, bro!
Sorry, guys.

1088
00:48:15,120 --> 00:48:17,009
Sorry. My friend's wasted.

1089
00:48:17,360 --> 00:48:18,361
Don't.

1090
00:48:18,440 --> 00:48:21,171
Ochoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, hey! No
adults are getting into my house.

1091
00:48:21,320 --> 00:48:22,845
Not on prom night.
Okay, not on prom.

1092
00:48:23,040 --> 00:48:25,771
We were just down the street
at another party

1093
00:48:25,960 --> 00:48:28,042
and then we just decided
to come up here

1094
00:48:28,200 --> 00:48:30,168
and hang with you guys. Uh...

1095
00:48:30,240 --> 00:48:31,241
No parents here, right?

1096
00:48:31,360 --> 00:48:32,361
Ah, thank God!

1097
00:48:32,440 --> 00:48:33,487
No, not except
for you guys. No.

1098
00:48:34,160 --> 00:48:35,810
We're not... We don't...

1099
00:48:35,880 --> 00:48:36,881
Yeah, no.

1100
00:48:36,960 --> 00:48:37,961
Okay, so you're cops.

1101
00:48:40,920 --> 00:48:43,287
I got two Duels last year.
How could I be a cop?

1102
00:48:43,480 --> 00:48:44,686
The police?

1103
00:48:44,840 --> 00:48:46,171
Look at my tuckered shirt.

1104
00:48:46,360 --> 00:48:48,681
You're literally the cop-lest
motherfucker I've ever seen.

1105
00:48:48,840 --> 00:48:51,446
You look like you got your hair
out in the back of a squad oar.

1106
00:48:52,440 --> 00:48:54,807
- This is a regular men's haircut.
- Okay.

1107
00:48:54,960 --> 00:48:56,371
This is ridiculous.

1108
00:48:56,520 --> 00:48:58,329
All right, you're minors,
we're minors.

1109
00:48:58,480 --> 00:48:59,811
You're, like, 45 years old.

1110
00:48:59,960 --> 00:49:01,564
Fuck you. I was born in '77.

1111
00:49:01,680 --> 00:49:02,681
'87.

1112
00:49:02,760 --> 00:49:03,761
'94.

1113
00:49:04,440 --> 00:49:06,044
We're gonna drink
with you guys.

1114
00:49:06,200 --> 00:49:09,010
Would cops drink
with underage kids? No.

1115
00:49:09,160 --> 00:49:11,083
Okay. What about
a little chugging contest?

1116
00:49:11,160 --> 00:49:12,446
Um...

1117
00:49:13,520 --> 00:49:15,204
Yeah. Bring it.

1118
00:49:16,440 --> 00:49:17,441
Okay, wait.

1119
00:49:17,520 --> 00:49:18,806
I gotta get the room ready.

1120
00:49:22,840 --> 00:49:23,966
Oh, wow!

1121
00:49:25,840 --> 00:49:27,171
You're really going for it,
aren't ya?

1122
00:49:27,360 --> 00:49:30,648
I saw this in the romantic comedy,
American Beauty. So good.

1123
00:49:31,480 --> 00:49:33,369
You watched the whole thing?

1124
00:49:38,040 --> 00:49:39,565
You know what
this candle does to me.

1125
00:49:39,720 --> 00:49:40,846
Is that the one
that gives you hives?

1126
00:49:41,040 --> 00:49:42,724
No, it's the good one.
Oh, nice.

1127
00:49:46,600 --> 00:49:48,250
You look so hot right now.

1128
00:49:58,720 --> 00:50:00,370
Where are my chiggers at?
You ready?

1129
00:50:00,520 --> 00:50:02,648
Oh, right here. Let's go!
What, what!

1130
00:50:02,960 --> 00:50:03,961
KYLE All right.

1131
00:50:04,040 --> 00:50:05,041
COO.

1132
00:50:05,120 --> 00:50:06,121
Drop 'em.

1133
00:50:06,200 --> 00:50:07,201
Let's do it.

1134
00:50:09,160 --> 00:50:10,446
Wait, what?

1135
00:50:10,600 --> 00:50:12,443
Guys?
We're lust chugging, right?

1136
00:50:12,600 --> 00:50:13,681
Yeah, we're butt-chugging.

1137
00:50:13,840 --> 00:50:15,922
Yeah, you put the tube up your
butt and you funnel the beer in.

1138
00:50:16,080 --> 00:50:18,526
It fucks you up way more,
man, trust me.

1139
00:50:18,680 --> 00:50:20,125
Guys, butt-chugging?
You got this. You got it.

1140
00:50:20,280 --> 00:50:21,520
No, I'm tagging out.
You're in.

1141
00:50:21,680 --> 00:50:22,920
What? Why me?

1142
00:50:23,120 --> 00:50:24,360
You've had a baby. Everything's
looser down there.

1143
00:50:25,120 --> 00:50:27,521
I didn't have a baby out of my butt.
Even I know that.

1144
00:50:27,680 --> 00:50:28,681
Mitchell.

1145
00:50:29,120 --> 00:50:31,851
Okay, this isn't a common
occurrence with me,

1146
00:50:32,000 --> 00:50:34,571
but I have had things
up there before.

1147
00:50:34,760 --> 00:50:36,569
Hmm?
It's just all about breathing.

1148
00:50:36,760 --> 00:50:40,003
So just breathe through it,
and accept it in.

1149
00:50:40,520 --> 00:50:41,521
I can't do it.
I can't do it.

1150
00:50:41,680 --> 00:50:43,603
Hey! She's up there right now
with that dick-bag, Connor,

1151
00:50:43,760 --> 00:50:45,364
with his man bun
and that stupid smirk.

1152
00:50:45,560 --> 00:50:47,005
Think about this.

1153
00:50:48,520 --> 00:50:50,045
Wait. Connor?

1154
00:50:50,200 --> 00:50:52,441
You know... You know
Connor Baldric, The Chef?

1155
00:50:53,320 --> 00:50:54,526
Why do they call him
"The Chef"?

1156
00:50:54,680 --> 00:50:57,001
Oh. Maybe a big fan
of South <i>Park?</i>

1157
00:50:57,160 --> 00:50:58,207
"Hello, children."

1158
00:50:58,320 --> 00:51:00,322
No. No. He cooks drugs
into everything.

1159
00:51:00,600 --> 00:51:04,241
Everything! One time he made me
this, like, acid financier cake.

1160
00:51:04,320 --> 00:51:06,891
Oh! That shit
was to die for, man!

1161
00:51:07,080 --> 00:51:08,889
Like, literally,
I almost fucking died.

1162
00:51:09,080 --> 00:51:11,003
Yeah. Dude, if your daughter
had anything like that cake,

1163
00:51:11,160 --> 00:51:12,650
she might not remember
who you are tomorrow.

1164
00:51:14,320 --> 00:51:16,163
Give me the fucking tube.

1165
00:51:18,400 --> 00:51:19,401
Let's bone.

1166
00:51:19,480 --> 00:51:20,481
Wait, what?

1167
00:51:20,560 --> 00:51:23,530
Oh! Are you sure that this
is how you wanna do it?

1168
00:51:26,000 --> 00:51:28,731
Yes, Chad. This is always
how I've imagined it.

1169
00:51:28,880 --> 00:51:31,167
Oh, you know, I'd rather leave
my shirt on, if that's sexier.

1170
00:51:31,240 --> 00:51:34,084
I need another drink.

1171
00:51:34,480 --> 00:51:35,481
Wait, wait, uh...

1172
00:51:37,920 --> 00:51:39,570
Can you lube it up
with something first?

1173
00:51:39,720 --> 00:51:41,051
Yeah, I'll just spit on it.
No!

1174
00:51:41,240 --> 00:51:43,402
Why? Because I'm a man?
Get over yourself.

1175
00:51:43,560 --> 00:51:46,643
No, 'cause you're fucking gross
and your fucking saliva's gross.

1176
00:51:46,800 --> 00:51:48,689
I have lip gloss.
We got lip gloss.

1177
00:51:48,840 --> 00:51:50,046
Okay, fine. Shit.

1178
00:51:50,200 --> 00:51:51,247
I don't have lip gloss.

1179
00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:52,925
All right, guys,
let's get those tubes in.

1180
00:51:53,080 --> 00:51:54,241
All right, I got the lip
gloss on there. Okay.

1181
00:51:54,400 --> 00:51:56,209
Okay, okay. All right.

1182
00:51:56,360 --> 00:51:57,361
Okay, ready?

1183
00:51:57,960 --> 00:51:58,961
Ow, ow, ow, ow.

1184
00:51:59,040 --> 00:52:00,121
- It's not in yet.
- Okay.

1185
00:52:00,280 --> 00:52:02,282
Chill. LISA: It's just
gonna be on the count of three.

1186
00:52:02,440 --> 00:52:03,851
You got this, gawd.
This is for your kid.

1187
00:52:04,000 --> 00:52:05,001
On three, okay. All right.

1188
00:52:05,080 --> 00:52:06,081
On three.
Yeah.

1189
00:52:06,160 --> 00:52:07,446
- Okay, one...
- One.

1190
00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:10,490
Are you okay?

1191
00:52:10,560 --> 00:52:11,561
Okay, get your 40s.

1192
00:52:11,640 --> 00:52:12,926
They got a lager or an IPA.

1193
00:52:13,080 --> 00:52:14,206
It doesn't matter.
Doesn't matter.

1194
00:52:14,400 --> 00:52:15,401
Okay.

1195
00:52:15,480 --> 00:52:16,686
I don't know flautist.
No,no,no,no.

1196
00:52:16,840 --> 00:52:17,841
It's too late.
It's already in.

1197
00:52:17,920 --> 00:52:19,081
Here you go. It's in you.
It's part of you now.

1198
00:52:19,280 --> 00:52:20,281
Ready?
Yeah.

1199
00:52:20,360 --> 00:52:21,566
Set...

1200
00:52:21,720 --> 00:52:22,960
Chug!

1201
00:52:23,160 --> 00:52:24,525
Butt chug! Butt chug!

1202
00:52:24,680 --> 00:52:26,330
Butt chug! Butt chug!

1203
00:52:26,480 --> 00:52:27,561
Wait.

1204
00:52:27,720 --> 00:52:29,404
- Hey, hey!
- Loosen up!

1205
00:52:29,560 --> 00:52:31,210
It's not working, dude.
I can't!

1206
00:52:31,360 --> 00:52:33,124
You can hold my hand!
Okay.

1207
00:52:33,960 --> 00:52:35,928
- Ow!
- You're hurting her.

1208
00:52:36,000 --> 00:52:37,001
God! It really hurt!
I'm sorry!

1209
00:52:38,400 --> 00:52:40,687
Channel that energy
into your butt hole.

1210
00:52:40,880 --> 00:52:42,245
This changes
everything I know!

1211
00:52:42,400 --> 00:52:45,244
Dude, if your daughter could
see you now she'd be so proud of you.

1212
00:52:47,120 --> 00:52:48,246
Whoa...

1213
00:52:49,440 --> 00:52:52,603
lam...
lam tripping so hard.

1214
00:52:52,760 --> 00:52:54,205
It's not working.
It's not working, dude.

1215
00:52:54,400 --> 00:52:56,448
- Oh, it's terrible.
- It is.

1216
00:52:57,560 --> 00:52:58,561
Open up!

1217
00:52:58,640 --> 00:53:00,404
I'm sorry.
I can't do it, man.

1218
00:53:00,560 --> 00:53:01,891
Focus! For your daughter.

1219
00:53:02,040 --> 00:53:03,565
Fuck, Mitch. Focus.

1220
00:53:03,720 --> 00:53:04,801
You gotta breathe.
You gotta open up, dude.

1221
00:53:04,960 --> 00:53:07,167
Relax!
I'm relaxed! I'm dilated.

1222
00:53:07,320 --> 00:53:09,721
I'm staring at your asshole.
You're not dilating.

1223
00:53:09,880 --> 00:53:13,441
Mitchell, you're gonna
lose to this punk bitch?

1224
00:53:13,600 --> 00:53:15,489
Breathe. Take it in!

1225
00:53:19,040 --> 00:53:20,041
There we go.

1226
00:53:20,400 --> 00:53:21,526
Okay, good.
Oh!

1227
00:53:21,680 --> 00:53:23,284
It's working!
It's working! Holy shit!

1228
00:53:23,440 --> 00:53:24,771
Holy shit!
It's working!

1229
00:53:24,920 --> 00:53:26,570
We're almost halfway done.

1230
00:53:26,680 --> 00:53:28,967
Po! Fucking run!

1231
00:53:29,160 --> 00:53:30,321
Cops?

1232
00:53:30,480 --> 00:53:31,686
What? Oh, no!

1233
00:53:34,840 --> 00:53:36,842
Ass beer!

1234
00:53:36,920 --> 00:53:40,003
Lisa, the foam went into my mouth!
I have to go to the hospital!

1235
00:53:40,160 --> 00:53:42,003
Hurry up!
Get out of here!

1236
00:53:42,080 --> 00:53:44,003
Shit!

1237
00:53:44,160 --> 00:53:45,730
We gotta go.

1238
00:53:45,880 --> 00:53:47,803
I got ass beer,
I should go to the hospital.

1239
00:53:47,960 --> 00:53:50,486
Shit!
The fucking cops?

1240
00:53:50,640 --> 00:53:52,244
The fucking cops are here?
Wait, wait, wait.

1241
00:53:52,400 --> 00:53:54,209
I can't get the tube out.
Pull the tube out.

1242
00:53:54,360 --> 00:53:56,124
Geese, pull it out.
No! I put it in!

1243
00:53:56,280 --> 00:53:58,044
I had to spit on it!
What? You spit on it?

1244
00:53:58,160 --> 00:53:59,161
No, it was my lip gloss.
What the fuck?

1245
00:53:59,240 --> 00:54:00,321
It was lip gloss.
Pull it out!

1246
00:54:00,480 --> 00:54:02,084
Hey, man, be gentle.
Be fucking gentle, all right?

1247
00:54:02,240 --> 00:54:03,605
I'm gonna be gentle,
all right? Ready?

1248
00:54:03,800 --> 00:54:04,961
All right, on three.
On three...

1249
00:54:05,120 --> 00:54:06,121
One.
Ow!

1250
00:54:10,040 --> 00:54:11,041
Come on.

1251
00:54:11,120 --> 00:54:12,804
Hey, guys!

1252
00:54:12,880 --> 00:54:13,881
Guys!

1253
00:54:14,000 --> 00:54:15,286
Wait, wait. Sam.

1254
00:54:15,480 --> 00:54:16,481
Sam!

1255
00:54:16,960 --> 00:54:18,485
Sam, Sam! We're over here.

1256
00:54:18,560 --> 00:54:19,561
No!

1257
00:54:19,640 --> 00:54:20,641
No. No.

1258
00:54:20,720 --> 00:54:22,245
The night is over.
No.

1259
00:54:22,440 --> 00:54:24,647
It's over. It's done.

1260
00:54:24,800 --> 00:54:26,529
The night is not over.

1261
00:54:27,280 --> 00:54:28,645
The night has just begun.

1262
00:54:33,360 --> 00:54:35,362
Jesus, Chad, use your legs.

1263
00:54:35,520 --> 00:54:37,682
I mean, I pretty much carried
her, like, the whole way there.

1264
00:54:46,560 --> 00:54:48,562
Hustle,hustle,hustle!

1265
00:54:49,800 --> 00:54:50,801
Come on, Sam.

1266
00:54:50,960 --> 00:54:52,121
Come with us!
I can't.

1267
00:54:52,280 --> 00:54:53,327
My car is here.

1268
00:54:53,480 --> 00:54:56,006
But all my friends
are going to the hotel party.

1269
00:54:56,360 --> 00:54:57,407
Maybe I'll see you later.

1270
00:55:02,720 --> 00:55:04,643
- Get in the car. Go, go, go, girl!
- Sam!

1271
00:55:04,800 --> 00:55:06,802
You'll see her later!
Seriously, hurry up!

1272
00:55:06,880 --> 00:55:07,881
What are you doing?

1273
00:55:07,960 --> 00:55:09,724
Shoo, this night is not over,
I swear to Christ!

1274
00:55:09,960 --> 00:55:11,325
<i>Dukes of Hazzard!</i>

1275
00:55:13,320 --> 00:55:14,606
Racist-ass show anyway.

1276
00:55:14,760 --> 00:55:15,761
I got the spins, man.

1277
00:55:15,880 --> 00:55:17,006
We gotta find
our daughter, gawd.

1278
00:55:17,080 --> 00:55:18,206
I'm gonna sit down
for a second.

1279
00:55:18,360 --> 00:55:19,441
Rudy! It's Rudy.

1280
00:55:20,400 --> 00:55:21,401
Rudy, Rudy,
wait, wait!

1281
00:55:21,520 --> 00:55:23,648
There he goes! Hit
the clicker, open the door!

1282
00:55:24,840 --> 00:55:26,001
I got mine.

1283
00:55:26,120 --> 00:55:27,121
Seat belts!

1284
00:55:27,200 --> 00:55:28,326
You'll get a big ticket.

1285
00:55:31,720 --> 00:55:32,721
That's them
right there.

1286
00:55:32,800 --> 00:55:34,131
They're getting away.
You gotta go faster.

1287
00:55:34,280 --> 00:55:36,760
Okay.
Hey, you gotta be in it 110%.

1288
00:55:36,920 --> 00:55:38,365
Okay.
You gotta be in it to win it!

1289
00:55:38,560 --> 00:55:40,244
How do you get more competitive
when you're drunk?

1290
00:55:40,440 --> 00:55:43,284
Hey, man. I'm more of a winner
when I'm drunk, all right?

1291
00:55:43,480 --> 00:55:46,051
And the question
that I have for you, Geese...

1292
00:55:46,200 --> 00:55:48,646
Are you a winner?
Are you in it to win it?

1293
00:55:48,800 --> 00:55:50,723
Winning is my bitch!
All right!

1294
00:55:50,880 --> 00:55:52,211
Sf long.
Knock,knock!

1295
00:55:52,280 --> 00:55:53,281
Who's there?

1296
00:55:53,360 --> 00:55:55,249
Me winning.

1297
00:55:57,280 --> 00:55:58,645
It's not...

1298
00:55:59,400 --> 00:56:00,481
It's not that good.

1299
00:56:02,440 --> 00:56:04,408
Ow. Ow!
Lisa winning!

1300
00:56:04,560 --> 00:56:06,085
It's not that good!

1301
00:56:06,160 --> 00:56:09,130
Ow! Fuck! All right, it's good.
It's fine. I like it.

1302
00:56:09,280 --> 00:56:10,486
Hey, you're losing him.
Let's go.

1303
00:56:13,040 --> 00:56:15,168
Oh. Not on my watch.

1304
00:56:19,960 --> 00:56:22,884
Y'all think you gonna outrun Rudy
the main motherfucking man Glover?

1305
00:56:23,040 --> 00:56:24,041
Hell, no.

1306
00:56:24,160 --> 00:56:25,605
Are you all right?
No.

1307
00:56:25,760 --> 00:56:26,841
Come on.

1308
00:56:28,920 --> 00:56:30,524
Hey, guys.

1309
00:56:31,200 --> 00:56:32,725
Hey, I don't...

1310
00:56:32,880 --> 00:56:35,531
I don't feel so...

1311
00:56:35,640 --> 00:56:36,641
Oh, my God!

1312
00:56:38,040 --> 00:56:39,041
Oh, my God!

1313
00:56:45,120 --> 00:56:46,201
All right,
here's what we're gonna do.

1314
00:56:46,360 --> 00:56:49,364
Lisa, I have seen every single
<i>Fast</i> and the Furious movie, okay?

1315
00:56:49,520 --> 00:56:51,841
All of them, dozens of times.
Have you seen any of them?

1316
00:56:52,000 --> 00:56:54,970
I saw the Tokyo one, and I saw the one
where The Rock punches the torpedo.

1317
00:56:55,120 --> 00:56:56,360
Those are the best two to see.

1318
00:56:56,520 --> 00:56:59,729
Okay, in times like this,
I ask myself one question.

1319
00:56:59,880 --> 00:57:02,281
"W-W-V-D-D." You know
what that means?

1320
00:57:02,480 --> 00:57:03,641
"What would In Diesel do?"

1321
00:57:03,800 --> 00:57:05,245
Holy shit!

1322
00:57:05,440 --> 00:57:06,930
No one's ever fucking
gotten that before. Okay.

1323
00:57:11,960 --> 00:57:13,928
Oh, man, it smells like...

1324
00:57:15,280 --> 00:57:16,964
What we're gonna do,
we're gonna kiss the bumper.

1325
00:57:17,160 --> 00:57:19,640
You give it a little tap, and
then they're gonna spin and stop

1326
00:57:19,800 --> 00:57:21,211
and we're gonna spin
and stop the other way

1327
00:57:21,360 --> 00:57:23,203
and we're gonna look at each
other, and we're gonna go,

1328
00:57:23,360 --> 00:57:24,771
"It's all about
the family."

1329
00:57:24,960 --> 00:57:27,247
Wait. I don't feel comfortable
running the kids off the road.

1330
00:57:27,400 --> 00:57:31,246
This slow and UN-furious attitude is
not helping us. You have to believe!

1331
00:57:31,400 --> 00:57:32,526
Okay. I'm gonna kiss it.

1332
00:57:32,680 --> 00:57:34,205
Here we go!

1333
00:57:35,680 --> 00:57:37,489
What's that?
Did <i>I</i> do it?

1334
00:57:37,680 --> 00:57:40,251
No, you didn't even kiss it.
You gotta kiss it.

1335
00:57:40,400 --> 00:57:42,562
Kiss it for the family!

1336
00:57:43,040 --> 00:57:44,724
Is that Sam?

1337
00:57:46,840 --> 00:57:48,524
She barfed on us!

1338
00:57:48,680 --> 00:57:50,330
Oh, my God!

1339
00:58:06,200 --> 00:58:07,884
Okay.

1340
00:58:08,160 --> 00:58:09,730
Are we in heaven?

1341
00:58:09,920 --> 00:58:11,809
Okay. Listen, I know
how to do this.

1342
00:58:11,960 --> 00:58:14,167
Everyone lean backwards.

1343
00:58:14,320 --> 00:58:17,722
If we all lean backwards on three,
the car will roll back. Ready?

1344
00:58:17,880 --> 00:58:19,211
Okay.
One,

1345
00:58:20,160 --> 00:58:21,685
two, three.

1346
00:58:22,680 --> 00:58:26,287
Oh, fuck!

1347
00:58:26,360 --> 00:58:28,681
Ah!

1348
00:58:32,400 --> 00:58:35,847
Well, that's the last
of the ass beer.

1349
00:58:36,080 --> 00:58:37,889
Jesus! That's it.

1350
00:58:38,040 --> 00:58:39,610
Are you okay?
Are you bleeding?

1351
00:58:39,680 --> 00:58:41,125
You might have
internal blood injuries.

1352
00:58:41,280 --> 00:58:42,361
I'm all right, I'm all right.

1353
00:58:42,480 --> 00:58:43,481
Here's the problem.

1354
00:58:43,560 --> 00:58:46,166
The <i>Fast</i> and The Furious
movies are not realistic.

1355
00:58:46,320 --> 00:58:48,482
Where are we? Shit!

1356
00:58:49,480 --> 00:58:50,481
Fuck!

1357
00:58:52,000 --> 00:58:53,331
What are you doing?

1358
00:58:53,480 --> 00:58:55,926
I heard that in times of crisis,
parents have superhuman strength.

1359
00:58:56,080 --> 00:58:58,242
No offense, there's no scientific way
you're gonna flip that car over.

1360
00:58:58,400 --> 00:58:59,401
I couldn't even do that.

1361
00:58:59,480 --> 00:59:00,481
Yeah, I couldn't do it,
either.

1362
00:59:00,560 --> 00:59:03,404
Do not tell me what I can and can't do.

1363
00:59:07,320 --> 00:59:09,049
Kayla's not answering again.

1364
00:59:09,200 --> 00:59:10,201
God damn it!
We lost 'em, guys.

1365
00:59:10,400 --> 00:59:12,846
We are fucked! Or maybe not.

1366
00:59:17,040 --> 00:59:18,041
What are you doing?

1367
00:59:18,120 --> 00:59:19,963
Trying to telepathically
communicate with Kayla.

1368
00:59:20,440 --> 00:59:21,566
I'm with the X-Men of parents.

1369
00:59:21,720 --> 00:59:22,881
You know what
my secret power is?

1370
00:59:23,080 --> 00:59:26,402
I'm super fucking annoyed right
now and I hurt my love handle.

1371
00:59:32,200 --> 00:59:33,201
All right.

1372
00:59:33,680 --> 00:59:35,842
You guys think my new clothes
go with my fedora?

1373
00:59:36,000 --> 00:59:38,002
I'm just kidding, I know they do.

1374
00:59:43,480 --> 00:59:44,481
Hey-

1375
00:59:46,760 --> 00:59:48,171
Have you talked
to your mom?

1376
00:59:48,280 --> 00:59:49,281
No.

1377
00:59:49,360 --> 00:59:51,044
So my parents
were just texting me

1378
00:59:51,200 --> 00:59:53,931
and they were having sex and your
mom showed up looking for you.

1379
00:59:55,880 --> 00:59:57,291
Oh, my God. I'm sorry.

1380
00:59:57,440 --> 00:59:59,966
It's okay. They have sex all the time.

1381
01:00:01,240 --> 01:00:03,402
Oh, my God,
she... The texts.

1382
01:00:03,600 --> 01:00:05,204
So many texts.

1383
01:00:05,720 --> 01:00:06,881
She's mad.

1384
01:00:07,120 --> 01:00:09,088
I need to handle this.

1385
01:00:09,240 --> 01:00:10,685
Good news.
A Left is on its way.

1386
01:00:10,840 --> 01:00:12,683
Oh, wait, no,
I know this guy. He sucks.

1387
01:00:12,840 --> 01:00:14,330
Oh, shit. It's Julie.

1388
01:00:14,680 --> 01:00:16,125
Be cool. Be cool.
Be cool. Be cool.

1389
01:00:16,280 --> 01:00:17,281
Be quiet. Okay.

1390
01:00:17,360 --> 01:00:18,486
<i>Hey,</i> Mom!

1391
01:00:18,640 --> 01:00:19,641
I just got all your texts

1392
01:00:19,760 --> 01:00:21,410
and I just wanted to let you
know that we're all good.

1393
01:00:21,560 --> 01:00:22,800
Cool. Cool. Okay.

1394
01:00:23,640 --> 01:00:26,007
Um... Are you at the prom?

1395
01:00:26,240 --> 01:00:29,608
Yeah. Yeah, just nonstop
magical moments.

1396
01:00:29,760 --> 01:00:31,091
<i>Huh. You are lying to me.</i>

1397
01:00:31,240 --> 01:00:32,730
Where are you right now?
Where are you?

1398
01:00:32,880 --> 01:00:33,927
Why are you freaking out?

1399
01:00:34,080 --> 01:00:37,562
I'm freaking out because I
know what you're up to.

1400
01:00:37,720 --> 01:00:39,006
And I know that
you and your friends

1401
01:00:39,160 --> 01:00:43,006
are planning some kind of
little sex pact or whatever.

1402
01:00:43,080 --> 01:00:44,081
<i>What did you say?</i>

1403
01:00:44,200 --> 01:00:45,201
You heard me.

1404
01:00:45,600 --> 01:00:47,807
How could you possibly know?

1405
01:00:47,960 --> 01:00:50,691
Because I am your mother
and I know you.

1406
01:00:50,840 --> 01:00:53,446
And I know you
better than you know yourself.

1407
01:00:53,600 --> 01:00:57,924
And I also know that you're
planning on going to UCLA

1408
01:00:58,080 --> 01:01:00,287
<i>and that
you're following Austin.</i>

1409
01:01:00,440 --> 01:01:01,771
Yeah.

1410
01:01:02,760 --> 01:01:06,401
I know everything.

1411
01:01:07,640 --> 01:01:11,008
Oh, my God,
you know nothing!

1412
01:01:11,160 --> 01:01:13,606
Why do you even assume
that it's me following Austin?

1413
01:01:13,720 --> 01:01:17,167
Huh? You're not worried
about me, Mom.

1414
01:01:17,360 --> 01:01:18,646
You're worried about you.

1415
01:01:18,800 --> 01:01:21,326
You're afraid of losing me.
You're afraid of being alone.

1416
01:01:21,480 --> 01:01:25,201
I am not scared of being alone.

1417
01:01:25,280 --> 01:01:27,009
<i>This is not about me.</i>

1418
01:01:27,200 --> 01:01:31,603
I have not thought about
myself for the last 18 years.

1419
01:01:31,760 --> 01:01:33,171
This is about you.

1420
01:01:33,320 --> 01:01:35,084
And as a single mother,

1421
01:01:35,240 --> 01:01:39,165
lam trying to stop you from
making a life-ruining decision.

1422
01:01:40,840 --> 01:01:42,968
So I was
"a life-ruining decision"?

1423
01:01:43,120 --> 01:01:44,121
No. No!

1424
01:01:44,240 --> 01:01:47,130
No, that is not
what I meant.

1425
01:01:47,200 --> 01:01:48,531
You know what, Mom?

1426
01:01:48,640 --> 01:01:51,246
I'm not going to UCLA
because of some boy, okay?

1427
01:01:51,400 --> 01:01:55,485
I'm going to UCLA because it's
the furthest I can get from you.

1428
01:01:57,400 --> 01:01:58,765
Well...

1429
01:01:58,920 --> 01:02:00,365
Hello?

1430
01:02:02,360 --> 01:02:04,840
Nauru is on his way.

1431
01:02:05,000 --> 01:02:06,126
Forty-six minutes.

1432
01:02:08,000 --> 01:02:09,286
Well...

1433
01:02:09,560 --> 01:02:11,483
So, she hates me.

1434
01:02:13,720 --> 01:02:15,609
She doesn't hate you.

1435
01:02:16,160 --> 01:02:19,448
Kayla's ignoring me. She's bringing
it to a whole new level of spite.

1436
01:02:19,680 --> 01:02:21,125
Yeah.

1437
01:02:21,280 --> 01:02:22,884
That's a new level of pain.

1438
01:02:23,040 --> 01:02:24,883
Yeah. I know.

1439
01:02:25,040 --> 01:02:28,362
It's just different for me
because I gave birth to her

1440
01:02:28,520 --> 01:02:30,249
and I just feel
very connected.

1441
01:02:30,400 --> 01:02:31,970
She was living in my body.

1442
01:02:32,120 --> 01:02:33,406
Kayla grew in me.

1443
01:02:33,600 --> 01:02:34,886
She grew in me. She did.

1444
01:02:35,040 --> 01:02:37,691
She grew from my balls
and I shot her into Marcie.

1445
01:02:37,840 --> 01:02:40,127
This is the same
for you and me.

1446
01:02:41,440 --> 01:02:42,771
Not exactly.

1447
01:02:42,920 --> 01:02:45,685
I mean, you have daily love
in your life

1448
01:02:45,840 --> 01:02:48,844
and I'm probably
gonna die alone

1449
01:02:49,000 --> 01:02:51,367
and won't be found
for a really long time.

1450
01:02:51,920 --> 01:02:54,127
Until one day, someone
will be walking by

1451
01:02:54,280 --> 01:02:55,645
with their golden retriever,

1452
01:02:55,800 --> 01:02:57,689
and the dog is just
gonna lose its shit.

1453
01:02:57,840 --> 01:02:59,126
And then they're gonna
call the police

1454
01:02:59,280 --> 01:03:03,330
and then they're gonna come in
and find me draped over the tub

1455
01:03:03,480 --> 01:03:07,280
with my feral cats
eating away at my hair.

1456
01:03:07,440 --> 01:03:08,680
'Cause cats do that.

1457
01:03:09,320 --> 01:03:12,164
The fuck is wrong with you?
That is some dark shit!

1458
01:03:12,320 --> 01:03:13,560
You're gonna die alone?

1459
01:03:13,720 --> 01:03:16,644
Whoa, whoa. My man! Come on! Wherever
the hell did you get that idea?

1460
01:03:16,800 --> 01:03:18,040
I call you all the time.

1461
01:03:18,200 --> 01:03:19,770
You ever return my calls? No.

1462
01:03:19,920 --> 01:03:21,763
Because we're not really
friends, you and me.

1463
01:03:22,280 --> 01:03:23,327
We're not friends?

1464
01:03:23,400 --> 01:03:24,925
I don't mean it at that...

1465
01:03:25,400 --> 01:03:26,731
You know what you are?

1466
01:03:26,880 --> 01:03:30,407
You are like the thing
that pops up on Facebook...

1467
01:03:30,760 --> 01:03:36,324
And then it's, like, this beautiful
picture of your grandma who's dead.

1468
01:03:36,480 --> 01:03:40,041
And you're, like, "Fuck you, Facebook,
for reminding me of my loss."

1469
01:03:40,200 --> 01:03:42,806
That's why you're avoiding me?
Because I remind you of loss?

1470
01:03:43,000 --> 01:03:47,642
Yes! I don't wanna be reminded of
sweet, young Julie and our kids

1471
01:03:47,840 --> 01:03:49,968
and that beautiful time
in our lives is over.

1472
01:03:50,120 --> 01:03:53,329
Oh, God! Boo-fucking-hew
with you two!

1473
01:03:53,480 --> 01:03:56,165
You guys completely
ignore me. Always.

1474
01:03:56,280 --> 01:03:57,281
Yeah, no shit, cheater.

1475
01:03:57,360 --> 01:03:59,044
Oh, "Cheater"?
That's my designation?

1476
01:03:59,200 --> 01:04:01,089
That's what I am?
I'm the cheater?

1477
01:04:01,240 --> 01:04:02,321
Fuck that shit.

1478
01:04:02,520 --> 01:04:04,966
Did you guys ever once call me
when that went down

1479
01:04:05,120 --> 01:04:07,407
and ask me
my side of the story?

1480
01:04:07,560 --> 01:04:08,800
You didn't.

1481
01:04:08,960 --> 01:04:10,007
I would've told you the truth.

1482
01:04:10,200 --> 01:04:12,680
I would've told you that Brenda
had stopped talking to me

1483
01:04:12,840 --> 01:04:14,729
months before that happened.

1484
01:04:14,880 --> 01:04:18,407
Do you know she hooked up with her boss
at a company retreat in Wisconsin?

1485
01:04:18,560 --> 01:04:19,641
Do you know she beat me up?

1486
01:04:19,800 --> 01:04:23,771
She fucking beat me up at a
Romano's fucking Macaroni Grill!

1487
01:04:23,960 --> 01:04:26,201
She fucking slapped me in front
of the fucking mattress!

1488
01:04:26,360 --> 01:04:27,566
I didn't know that.
I'm sorry, man.

1489
01:04:27,720 --> 01:04:29,245
And I fucking
embarrassed myself

1490
01:04:29,400 --> 01:04:31,880
and I embarrassed myself
in front of my daughter.

1491
01:04:32,040 --> 01:04:34,725
And I thought, "You know, I
should pull back a little bit,"

1492
01:04:34,880 --> 01:04:35,961
and fucking Frank showed up.

1493
01:04:36,440 --> 01:04:37,726
And I pulled back more

1494
01:04:37,880 --> 01:04:39,609
and I thought, "One day
I'm gonna fix it.

1495
01:04:39,760 --> 01:04:41,364
"One day I'm gonna
fucking fix it."

1496
01:04:41,560 --> 01:04:46,282
And then I thought if I gave her
something awesome like a great night...

1497
01:04:48,480 --> 01:04:51,848
I could get close with her
again, but I can't.

1498
01:04:55,720 --> 01:04:58,166
'Cause she's gone.
They're just...

1499
01:04:58,480 --> 01:04:59,481
The kids,

1500
01:05:00,080 --> 01:05:01,081
they just leave.
Oh, shit!

1501
01:05:01,240 --> 01:05:03,288
I know how we can find 'em.

1502
01:05:03,440 --> 01:05:04,680
Go to Cathy and Ron's.

1503
01:05:04,840 --> 01:05:06,330
Austin's been texting them
all night.

1504
01:05:07,080 --> 01:05:08,320
Did you hear
anything I said just now?

1505
01:05:08,480 --> 01:05:09,481
That's a great idea.

1506
01:05:09,720 --> 01:05:11,449
Fuck it. It's just
good to say it out loud.

1507
01:05:11,600 --> 01:05:12,886
Let's go flip that car.

1508
01:05:13,040 --> 01:05:14,041
Hell...

1509
01:05:14,920 --> 01:05:17,002
Jesus Christ!

1510
01:05:18,080 --> 01:05:20,765
Oh, my fucking God!

1511
01:05:22,280 --> 01:05:23,566
Shit!

1512
01:05:24,080 --> 01:05:26,208
My car just exploded.

1513
01:05:29,120 --> 01:05:33,250
Nauru is 26 minutes away.
So that's good.

1514
01:05:33,400 --> 01:05:34,481
I thought I canceled him.

1515
01:05:34,640 --> 01:05:35,801
Thanks, Nauru.

1516
01:05:35,960 --> 01:05:38,850
So Austin's parents aren't gonna
just tell us where they are.

1517
01:05:39,000 --> 01:05:41,048
So we need
to get Ron's phone,

1518
01:05:41,200 --> 01:05:44,010
read the texts,
and find our kids. Okay?

1519
01:05:44,160 --> 01:05:46,049
Hunter, it's not
gonna be you.

1520
01:05:46,200 --> 01:05:47,531
So, Mitchell, it's you.

1521
01:05:47,680 --> 01:05:49,921
No. That's breaking
and entering. That is...

1522
01:05:50,080 --> 01:05:51,445
I'm uncomfortable with that.

1523
01:05:51,600 --> 01:05:53,204
Are you a team player,
or aren't you?

1524
01:05:53,360 --> 01:05:54,361
Am I a team player?

1525
01:05:54,520 --> 01:05:56,841
I just chugged a 4 with my asshole.
I'm a team player.

1526
01:05:57,000 --> 01:05:58,445
Then get your head
in the game.

1527
01:05:58,640 --> 01:06:00,130
It's the bottom of the third.

1528
01:06:00,280 --> 01:06:03,602
We are down by one and there
is not a lot of game left.

1529
01:06:05,000 --> 01:06:06,126
There is a lot of game
left though.

1530
01:06:06,320 --> 01:06:10,769
Listen. You have one pass left.
One. One pass.

1531
01:06:11,680 --> 01:06:12,727
Is it rugby? Is it

1532
01:06:12,840 --> 01:06:13,887
Australian rules football? They
don't put a limit on passing.

1533
01:06:14,040 --> 01:06:15,405
If it was the third,
then I'd have the fourth.

1534
01:06:15,560 --> 01:06:16,846
You know what? You know
what's happening right now?

1535
01:06:17,000 --> 01:06:18,445
Let me tell you
what's happening right now,

1536
01:06:18,600 --> 01:06:21,080
is Kayla and Connor
are sliding into bed.

1537
01:06:21,240 --> 01:06:22,321
He's grabbing a condom

1538
01:06:22,480 --> 01:06:24,528
and then he's flicking it
to the side

1539
01:06:24,680 --> 01:06:26,330
with a smirk on his face.

1540
01:06:26,560 --> 01:06:29,325
That fucking smirk. No way.

1541
01:06:29,480 --> 01:06:32,290
We need a Hail Mary pass.
Are you up for that, son?

1542
01:06:32,440 --> 01:06:33,771
Yes, Coach.
Well, I can't hear you.

1543
01:06:33,920 --> 01:06:35,490
Yes, Coach. I'm in it!
I can't hear you.

1544
01:06:35,640 --> 01:06:37,005
I can fucking do this!
Let's go!

1545
01:06:37,160 --> 01:06:38,366
We gotta be quiet.

1546
01:06:43,440 --> 01:06:44,680
Careful.

1547
01:06:50,360 --> 01:06:51,441
All right, go.

1548
01:06:51,920 --> 01:06:52,921
Go.

1549
01:07:19,160 --> 01:07:20,321
Did you...

1550
01:07:28,520 --> 01:07:30,807
Go.
There's a person!

1551
01:07:30,960 --> 01:07:32,530
What? Fuck you.

1552
01:07:34,040 --> 01:07:35,690
Jesus Christ.

1553
01:07:48,240 --> 01:07:51,164
I'm gonna get you!

1554
01:07:51,640 --> 01:07:55,440
Not if I get you first.

1555
01:08:02,800 --> 01:08:03,801
Get away from here.

1556
01:08:03,880 --> 01:08:04,881
I'm fucking out!

1557
01:08:04,960 --> 01:08:06,405
Mitchell, in!
Get in.

1558
01:08:08,320 --> 01:08:09,321
<i>Bath'?</i>

1559
01:08:09,400 --> 01:08:10,686
Ron, no talking.

1560
01:08:10,960 --> 01:08:11,961
Come on, we had a deal.

1561
01:08:12,120 --> 01:08:15,363
We have to find each other
by sensing each other's musks.

1562
01:08:15,520 --> 01:08:16,931
Can't use our voices.

1563
01:08:36,280 --> 01:08:37,566
Here, kitty, kitty.

1564
01:08:37,720 --> 01:08:39,404
I can smell that musk.

1565
01:08:47,400 --> 01:08:48,401
Yeah!

1566
01:08:48,520 --> 01:08:51,410
Yeah! Yeah! I like
the sound of that!

1567
01:08:51,520 --> 01:08:52,806
Oh!

1568
01:08:53,040 --> 01:08:54,724
on! Hey!

1569
01:08:54,800 --> 01:08:57,485
You wanna touch first,
that works for Ronnie!

1570
01:08:57,640 --> 01:08:58,687
You want me to touch you?

1571
01:08:58,840 --> 01:09:00,080
Help yourself. Yes.
You want me to touch you?

1572
01:09:00,280 --> 01:09:02,442
I'm gonna touch you. Hard.

1573
01:09:02,560 --> 01:09:03,607
Do it.
How about I touch you...

1574
01:09:03,680 --> 01:09:05,284
Do it.
...with my nails, baby?

1575
01:09:05,360 --> 01:09:07,442
Let's have it!
Oh!

1576
01:09:07,560 --> 01:09:10,564
Your hair is so sexy, babe.
Oh, your grip is unbelievable.

1577
01:09:10,720 --> 01:09:13,485
I want you to touch me
where I like.

1578
01:09:13,640 --> 01:09:15,563
My balls. You know?

1579
01:09:30,240 --> 01:09:32,925
I want it bad. Do it, come on!
Really? How bad?

1580
01:09:41,880 --> 01:09:44,360
Let's go. Come on.
Come on, do it!

1581
01:09:44,520 --> 01:09:46,329
You there?
What, this isn't hard enough?

1582
01:09:46,480 --> 01:09:47,606
Let's go. Come on.

1583
01:09:47,760 --> 01:09:49,330
- Harder?
- Come on, do it.

1584
01:09:49,480 --> 01:09:50,481
Do it, I'm waiting.

1585
01:09:50,640 --> 01:09:51,641
Keystroke.

1586
01:09:52,360 --> 01:09:54,169
Oh, yeah,
you like that?

1587
01:09:54,240 --> 01:09:56,527
Hey, man, I don’t judge
people's sex shit.

1588
01:09:56,800 --> 01:09:58,245
But that was
ridiculous and stupid.

1589
01:09:58,400 --> 01:09:59,561
Way to take one
for the team, guys.

1590
01:09:59,720 --> 01:10:01,370
Hold on, hold on,
hold on. Here it is.

1591
01:10:01,520 --> 01:10:03,204
"The police came
to the lake house.

1592
01:10:03,360 --> 01:10:05,567
"Almost lost my flower
but didn't quite work out."

1593
01:10:05,680 --> 01:10:06,681
"Flower"?

1594
01:10:06,760 --> 01:10:07,761
He said that? He's a boy.

1595
01:10:07,840 --> 01:10:10,161
Uh, hub, hub... "Heading
to the Park V Vest Hotel.

1596
01:10:10,320 --> 01:10:11,731
"We've got
the Grand Lux Suite.

1597
01:10:11,880 --> 01:10:14,326
"Looks like the little boy
is becoming a man."

1598
01:10:14,400 --> 01:10:15,447
Fucking dork.

1599
01:10:15,520 --> 01:10:16,521
Okay, so that was
10 minutes ago.

1600
01:10:16,680 --> 01:10:17,681
So they haven't had sex yet.

1601
01:10:17,760 --> 01:10:18,761
We can still catch them.

1602
01:10:18,840 --> 01:10:20,649
Okay, let's do this.

1603
01:11:05,840 --> 01:11:06,841
Hey-

1604
01:11:06,920 --> 01:11:08,285
Hey-
Hey-

1605
01:11:08,440 --> 01:11:10,010
How's she doing?
Is she okay?

1606
01:11:10,200 --> 01:11:11,929
No, she's not doing okay.
She's bummed.

1607
01:11:12,120 --> 01:11:14,441
She doesn't even wanna kiss.
And I love kissing.

1608
01:11:16,480 --> 01:11:18,164
Give me your room key.

1609
01:11:18,320 --> 01:11:19,321
What? Why?
Yeah.

1610
01:11:19,440 --> 01:11:22,887
Give me your room key and then
bring her up in, like, 15 minutes.

1611
01:11:23,280 --> 01:11:24,805
Uh, okay.

1612
01:11:24,880 --> 01:11:27,804
Yes. Thanks. You're the man.
Thank you for this.

1613
01:11:35,040 --> 01:11:37,691
How we supposed to find them in this place?
It's got, like, 20 rooms.

1614
01:11:37,840 --> 01:11:40,764
I'm sorry, what the
fuck are you talking about?

1615
01:11:40,920 --> 01:11:43,924
"Twenty"? It's got,
like, 200! What? Twenty?

1616
01:11:44,080 --> 01:11:46,208
Grand Lux Suite
is on the top floor.

1617
01:11:46,400 --> 01:11:47,606
Go, go, go! Move!

1618
01:11:47,760 --> 01:11:48,761
Hurry, Lisa!

1619
01:12:51,200 --> 01:12:53,202
What am I doing here?

1620
01:13:12,280 --> 01:13:13,805
on, my God!

1621
01:13:13,960 --> 01:13:15,849
Oh, my God, my favorite!

1622
01:13:16,600 --> 01:13:18,329
That's so sweet.

1623
01:13:18,400 --> 01:13:21,006
Oh, my God! This is a dream!

1624
01:13:21,160 --> 01:13:24,607
It's, like, perfect! That is so nice!
You're so sweet.

1625
01:13:24,760 --> 01:13:27,843
It actually wasn't me.
It was Kayla.

1626
01:13:28,000 --> 01:13:29,445
She wanted you to have
the perfect night.

1627
01:13:29,600 --> 01:13:30,647
That's why it looks so good.

1628
01:13:30,840 --> 01:13:32,046
Well,

1629
01:13:32,200 --> 01:13:33,531
why do you look
so good?

1630
01:13:33,600 --> 01:13:35,443
You're such a dork.

1631
01:13:35,640 --> 01:13:37,210
I know.

1632
01:13:39,840 --> 01:13:41,080
On, my God!

1633
01:13:45,920 --> 01:13:47,649
Not as smooth
as I could have.

1634
01:13:52,040 --> 01:13:53,371
Let me get my shoes.

1635
01:13:57,600 --> 01:13:58,681
Kayla?

1636
01:14:04,960 --> 01:14:06,405
Nobody move, where's Kayla?

1637
01:14:06,560 --> 01:14:07,561
Kayla?

1638
01:14:07,880 --> 01:14:08,881
Kayla?

1639
01:14:09,880 --> 01:14:11,962
Get that outta here.

1640
01:14:12,120 --> 01:14:13,485
Um, how's this work?
No, just leave it.

1641
01:14:13,640 --> 01:14:15,210
Okay, cool. Mmm-hmm.
It's difficult.

1642
01:14:18,320 --> 01:14:20,049
Play sports!

1643
01:14:26,800 --> 01:14:27,801
And that's that.

1644
01:14:29,040 --> 01:14:31,008
So, you sure
you wanna do this?

1645
01:14:31,160 --> 01:14:32,161
Yeah.

1646
01:14:32,360 --> 01:14:33,725
Yes! Fuck, yeah.

1647
01:14:33,880 --> 01:14:35,609
You're gonna penis me.

1648
01:14:35,720 --> 01:14:36,721
Yeah.

1649
01:14:36,800 --> 01:14:38,370
First I'm gonna...

1650
01:14:38,520 --> 01:14:39,726
I'm just gonna touch it.

1651
01:14:39,880 --> 01:14:41,405
You wanna touch it?
Yeah, you can touch it.

1652
01:14:41,560 --> 01:14:43,369
Yeah, yeah, go for it.
Okay, just, like...

1653
01:14:43,640 --> 01:14:45,324
Oh! Wow!

1654
01:14:45,400 --> 01:14:49,450
Okay. That is like the greatest feeling
I've ever had in my entire life.

1655
01:14:49,600 --> 01:14:50,965
Really?

1656
01:14:51,320 --> 01:14:55,166
It doesn't just feel like
a super-dry hand of a friend?

1657
01:14:55,320 --> 01:14:56,890
No. Nope.

1658
01:14:58,200 --> 01:14:59,770
Okay. So,

1659
01:15:00,520 --> 01:15:02,010
do you wanna

1660
01:15:03,480 --> 01:15:04,527
Put it in?

1661
01:15:07,960 --> 01:15:08,961
No.

1662
01:15:09,480 --> 01:15:10,481
Okay-

1663
01:15:10,560 --> 01:15:11,891
I can't. I'm sorry.
You know what?

1664
01:15:12,320 --> 01:15:14,448
Look, we don't...

1665
01:15:14,600 --> 01:15:16,090
9, my God! Oh, my God!

1666
01:15:16,280 --> 01:15:17,850
Holy shit!
Look at all of it.

1667
01:15:18,000 --> 01:15:19,889
Oh, my gosh!
I gotta get over.

1668
01:15:20,400 --> 01:15:23,722
Okay. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.

1669
01:15:23,880 --> 01:15:26,451
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry,
I'm so sorry. I just...

1670
01:15:26,600 --> 01:15:27,806
It's okay.
I was thinking about it

1671
01:15:28,000 --> 01:15:29,729
and you, and then it just...

1672
01:15:29,920 --> 01:15:30,967
I'm sorry.

1673
01:15:34,600 --> 01:15:35,601
You're amazing.

1674
01:15:36,160 --> 01:15:37,650
I know we're still virgins,

1675
01:15:38,120 --> 01:15:40,202
but I feel different.
You know?

1676
01:15:40,360 --> 01:15:41,407
Yeah.

1677
01:15:43,200 --> 01:15:44,725
I know.

1678
01:15:47,200 --> 01:15:49,851
You ready to, uh, do this?

1679
01:15:51,040 --> 01:15:52,041
Wait.

1680
01:15:52,120 --> 01:15:53,565
Wait. Um...

1681
01:15:54,760 --> 01:15:57,240
Ah, shit.

1682
01:15:57,400 --> 01:15:58,561
Shit.

1683
01:16:01,080 --> 01:16:03,003
Maybe Julie was right.

1684
01:16:03,360 --> 01:16:04,566
Like, maybe

1685
01:16:04,720 --> 01:16:08,202
losing your virginity doesn't
have to be perfect, but...

1686
01:16:08,360 --> 01:16:11,967
I feel like it should just be, like,
a little bit more special than this.

1687
01:16:12,120 --> 01:16:13,610
Yeah.
Like, not cheesy, but...

1688
01:16:14,160 --> 01:16:16,049
Like, if I was hard-pressed
right now,

1689
01:16:16,200 --> 01:16:18,680
I don't think I could
remember your last name.

1690
01:16:18,880 --> 01:16:19,881
It's Baldric.
Baldric!

1691
01:16:20,440 --> 01:16:21,771
I thought it was Ostrich.

1692
01:16:21,920 --> 01:16:25,288
I didn't realize that you're a virgin.
You know?

1693
01:16:25,440 --> 01:16:26,441
Yeah.

1694
01:16:26,960 --> 01:16:30,362
Um, but, like, I'd still
be down to do it

1695
01:16:30,560 --> 01:16:31,925
but maybe, like, you know,

1696
01:16:32,080 --> 01:16:33,730
when we get to know
each other a little more.

1697
01:16:33,880 --> 01:16:36,247
Like, maybe Monday
or something?

1698
01:16:36,360 --> 01:16:37,361
Yeah.

1699
01:16:37,440 --> 01:16:38,441
Not to, like,
plan it and be weird.

1700
01:16:38,600 --> 01:16:40,682
No,no,Caloocan at my
schedule and see if it's...

1701
01:16:40,760 --> 01:16:41,761
Okay.

1702
01:16:41,840 --> 01:16:43,365
Pencil it in.

1703
01:16:44,280 --> 01:16:45,930
Um, yeah, that's cool.
Okay, cool.

1704
01:16:46,120 --> 01:16:49,169
Let's just relax. We could do some
photojournalist or something.

1705
01:16:49,360 --> 01:16:52,443
Yeah, yeah, we could do that.

1706
01:16:53,200 --> 01:16:57,524
Or we could do,
like, other stuff.

1707
01:16:57,680 --> 01:16:59,045
Yeah, like what?

1708
01:16:59,200 --> 01:17:00,725
Like...

1709
01:17:01,400 --> 01:17:03,607
Not sex, but...

1710
01:17:05,000 --> 01:17:08,447
I'm still down for pleasure.

1711
01:17:15,560 --> 01:17:16,971
You got this.

1712
01:17:17,120 --> 01:17:19,646
Hey, guys, what's up?
Anyone seen Sam?

1713
01:17:19,800 --> 01:17:21,404
Anyone seen Sam?

1714
01:17:26,680 --> 01:17:27,806
Chad!

1715
01:17:34,320 --> 01:17:35,321
Oh, Jesus!

1716
01:17:37,480 --> 01:17:38,970
What the...

1717
01:17:39,040 --> 01:17:40,041
You again?

1718
01:17:40,120 --> 01:17:41,281
You?
What the fuck?

1719
01:17:41,440 --> 01:17:42,805
What's your beef
with me, dude?

1720
01:17:42,960 --> 01:17:44,121
I don't know
who the fuck you are!

1721
01:17:44,280 --> 01:17:46,123
I'm Jake
motherfucking Donahue!

1722
01:17:46,280 --> 01:17:48,123
That name means nothing to me!

1723
01:17:48,280 --> 01:17:51,682
Do you know what it's like to be
humiliated in front of everyone you know

1724
01:17:51,840 --> 01:17:53,649
and have to seek
redemption for that?

1725
01:17:55,160 --> 01:17:56,730
Actually, yes, I do!

1726
01:17:56,880 --> 01:18:01,522
Kayla?

1727
01:18:01,680 --> 01:18:03,887
Get the hell away from my daughter,
you little piece of shit!

1728
01:18:04,040 --> 01:18:05,451
Dad, what the...

1729
01:18:06,280 --> 01:18:07,281
Oh, my God!

1730
01:18:07,360 --> 01:18:08,850
Are you okay?
He didn't hurt you, did he?

1731
01:18:09,000 --> 01:18:10,365
What? No, he didn't hurt me.

1732
01:18:10,520 --> 01:18:12,409
Holy shit! Connor?

1733
01:18:12,560 --> 01:18:14,164
Oh, my God! Are you okay?

1734
01:18:14,320 --> 01:18:15,765
I'm actually totally fine.

1735
01:18:16,320 --> 01:18:17,287
Connor, I'm so sorry.

1736
01:18:17,400 --> 01:18:19,607
Are you okay, though?
Are you sure? Yeah.

1737
01:18:20,240 --> 01:18:21,605
Dad! What the...

1738
01:18:21,800 --> 01:18:22,801
What are you doing here?

1739
01:18:22,880 --> 01:18:24,211
I've been following you
around all night!

1740
01:18:24,280 --> 01:18:25,281
Are you tier...
Oh, my God!

1741
01:18:25,360 --> 01:18:26,486
You've been following me?

1742
01:18:26,680 --> 01:18:28,170
Are you crazy?
You gave me no choice!

1743
01:18:28,320 --> 01:18:29,446
You're in over your head
with this kid.

1744
01:18:29,640 --> 01:18:32,246
I am not some pathetic damsel
in distress that needs saving.

1745
01:18:32,400 --> 01:18:33,606
I can handle myself.
No, you can't.

1746
01:18:33,760 --> 01:18:35,250
Yes, I can!
No, you can't!

1747
01:18:35,400 --> 01:18:36,811
Yes, I can!
Kayla,

1748
01:18:37,160 --> 01:18:40,084
you can't.
And that's why I'm here.

1749
01:18:40,280 --> 01:18:41,327
It's my job.

1750
01:18:43,080 --> 01:18:44,161
Oh.

1751
01:18:44,800 --> 01:18:49,362
Yeah, so you just don't think I can make
my own decisions and handle myself.

1752
01:18:50,720 --> 01:18:52,688
That really fucking sucks.

1753
01:18:55,800 --> 01:18:57,962
Kayla...

1754
01:18:59,000 --> 01:19:01,606
Kayla, I'm just trying
to figure this thing out.

1755
01:19:02,360 --> 01:19:04,647
God! Why is sex even bad?

1756
01:19:09,800 --> 01:19:11,529
I don't know. I don't know.
It's not... You know, it's...

1757
01:19:14,080 --> 01:19:15,605
I don't know.

1758
01:19:16,600 --> 01:19:17,931
I'm...

1759
01:19:18,840 --> 01:19:21,446
I'm just trying to be
the best dad I can be.

1760
01:19:21,600 --> 01:19:24,001
Well, you are.

1761
01:19:24,880 --> 01:19:27,167
You taught me everything.

1762
01:19:27,440 --> 01:19:30,011
You built me up.

1763
01:19:30,200 --> 01:19:32,487
Made me strong.

1764
01:19:32,640 --> 01:19:35,610
You made me into who I am.
Like, that's...

1765
01:19:37,120 --> 01:19:40,124
You did not have to save me
tonight, Dad.

1766
01:19:40,280 --> 01:19:43,727
You taught me how to do that
a long time ago.

1767
01:19:45,720 --> 01:19:47,085
And I love you for it.

1768
01:19:49,520 --> 01:19:51,522
You're the best coach ever.

1769
01:19:56,880 --> 01:19:59,008
Thank you.
Thank you.

1770
01:19:59,600 --> 01:20:01,090
Oh, Dad, come on.

1771
01:20:02,280 --> 01:20:03,850
Come on, toughen up.

1772
01:20:05,560 --> 01:20:07,130
It was just really nice,
what you said.

1773
01:20:08,160 --> 01:20:10,208
It's good. It's good.
I mean it.

1774
01:20:11,000 --> 01:20:12,764
Thanks, I feel like...

1775
01:20:12,920 --> 01:20:16,970
Like Phil Jackson when he
was coaching the Bulls...

1776
01:20:17,160 --> 01:20:20,767
And then
they were so good.

1777
01:20:22,440 --> 01:20:24,010
That's how I feel right now.
Yeah.

1778
01:20:24,720 --> 01:20:26,848
Uh, I should've taken
my socks off first.

1779
01:20:30,080 --> 01:20:33,004
I'm just warning you, I've practiced a few
times but this might not go that well.

1780
01:20:33,160 --> 01:20:34,207
That doesn't look right.

1781
01:20:34,360 --> 01:20:35,646
Yeah, all right. I think
you need another one.

1782
01:20:35,760 --> 01:20:36,761
I think we need
another one, too.

1783
01:20:36,840 --> 01:20:37,887
Wait, wait.

1784
01:20:38,040 --> 01:20:39,565
We have to do our dance.

1785
01:20:39,720 --> 01:20:41,324
We have to... Yeah, yeah.
What, now?

1786
01:20:41,440 --> 01:20:42,441
Naked?

1787
01:20:42,520 --> 01:20:44,443
No, get me one of
those, um, hotel robes.

1788
01:20:44,600 --> 01:20:45,761
I wanna feel fabulous.

1789
01:20:45,920 --> 01:20:46,921
Okay.

1790
01:20:47,320 --> 01:20:48,481
Coming right up, my lady.

1791
01:21:04,200 --> 01:21:06,965
We're gonna christen
every corner of this room.

1792
01:21:07,120 --> 01:21:08,121
And when we're done,

1793
01:21:08,680 --> 01:21:10,045
let's Face Time my parents.

1794
01:21:10,200 --> 01:21:13,886
Okay, but right now, I
want you to stare into my eyes.

1795
01:21:14,040 --> 01:21:15,087
AUSTIN; What?

1796
01:21:15,440 --> 01:21:18,649
Mmm-hmm. I just want,
like, a real connection.

1797
01:21:18,800 --> 01:21:20,643
So you just want me to
look straight into your eyes

1798
01:21:20,800 --> 01:21:23,565
for the next three minutes and 37 seconds?
Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.

1799
01:21:32,640 --> 01:21:33,641
Look at me.

1800
01:22:50,360 --> 01:22:51,361
Dad?
Where is he?

1801
01:22:51,440 --> 01:22:52,441
What are you doing here?

1802
01:22:52,520 --> 01:22:53,521
Chad?

1803
01:22:53,640 --> 01:22:55,165
Hey, Chad, you motherfucker.

1804
01:22:55,360 --> 01:22:57,488
Oh, my God,
are you kidding me?

1805
01:22:57,640 --> 01:22:59,051
Did he make you do something
you don't wanna do?

1806
01:22:59,240 --> 01:23:01,641
'Cause I don't care if he's the
fucking coolest kid in school.

1807
01:23:01,800 --> 01:23:05,566
I'm gonna shove his fedora so
far up his ass, it'll be a hat.

1808
01:23:05,720 --> 01:23:08,405
No, Dad, we didn't do it.

1809
01:23:08,560 --> 01:23:12,963
All right? And even if we did, it
would be none of your business.

1810
01:23:16,760 --> 01:23:19,445
It's just, I was worried about you.

1811
01:23:19,800 --> 01:23:20,847
Well, that's a first.

1812
01:23:22,240 --> 01:23:23,241
I deserve that.

1813
01:23:24,600 --> 01:23:26,841
Sam, I gotta tell you
something and I'm just gonna say it.

1814
01:23:36,640 --> 01:23:39,246
Sam, I have realized

1815
01:23:39,440 --> 01:23:41,761
over the last few years

1816
01:23:43,200 --> 01:23:45,248
that I've made
a big mistake in my life.

1817
01:23:46,200 --> 01:23:47,531
What, like cheating on my mom?

1818
01:23:48,720 --> 01:23:50,484
Well, no. Marrying your mom.

1819
01:23:50,760 --> 01:23:52,888
But, no, that wasn't
a mistake,

1820
01:23:53,040 --> 01:23:55,168
because then I wouldn't
have had you. Uh...

1821
01:23:56,360 --> 01:24:00,490
I've made lots of mistakes,
but the big mistake

1822
01:24:02,120 --> 01:24:06,762
is that I let what happened
between your mom and I

1823
01:24:07,800 --> 01:24:10,371
get in the way
of our relationship.

1824
01:24:14,720 --> 01:24:15,721
I'm sorry.

1825
01:24:17,120 --> 01:24:18,451
And I hope that

1826
01:24:18,600 --> 01:24:20,648
we can start over and

1827
01:24:21,800 --> 01:24:24,326
build up our relationship
again because

1828
01:24:25,280 --> 01:24:27,442
you're my only kid.

1829
01:24:29,000 --> 01:24:30,161
And I'm your only dad.

1830
01:24:30,680 --> 01:24:32,808
Well, Frank is...
Fuck Frank.

1831
01:24:37,040 --> 01:24:38,451
Frank's fine.

1832
01:24:39,240 --> 01:24:40,844
Dad,

1833
01:24:41,200 --> 01:24:42,406
can I tell you something now?

1834
01:24:42,560 --> 01:24:44,927
Yes. Yes, yes, yes, anything.

1835
01:24:45,800 --> 01:24:47,006
I'm a lesbian.

1836
01:24:57,120 --> 01:24:58,531
What does your mom think?

1837
01:24:58,680 --> 01:24:59,727
She doesn't know.

1838
01:25:04,920 --> 01:25:06,490
You told me before
you told your mom?

1839
01:25:06,640 --> 01:25:07,687
Yeah.

1840
01:25:07,840 --> 01:25:08,921
That's big news.

1841
01:25:09,400 --> 01:25:10,765
She doesn't know?

1842
01:25:11,640 --> 01:25:13,244
You didn't tell Frank?
No.

1843
01:25:23,200 --> 01:25:24,964
Ah.

1844
01:25:25,080 --> 01:25:27,481
Okay. Over. Crying is over.

1845
01:25:28,800 --> 01:25:29,881
What do
your girlfriends think?

1846
01:25:30,040 --> 01:25:31,804
No, I'm too nervous,
I can't tell them.

1847
01:25:32,080 --> 01:25:34,481
You're nervous
to tell Kayla and Julie?

1848
01:25:35,400 --> 01:25:37,243
I don't wanna lose
my two best friends.

1849
01:25:37,440 --> 01:25:39,568
This is the stuff you tell
the people you care about.

1850
01:25:40,080 --> 01:25:42,560
You think they're not gonna
support you because you're gay?

1851
01:25:42,720 --> 01:25:45,929
They would support you
if you were a vampire.

1852
01:25:46,080 --> 01:25:50,085
They would support you more. With
all the <i>Twilight</i> shit.

1853
01:25:50,160 --> 01:25:51,491
Do we Still like Twilight?

1854
01:25:51,640 --> 01:25:52,641
Definitely not.

1855
01:25:52,720 --> 01:25:53,960
No, no.

1856
01:25:55,600 --> 01:25:56,601
Oh, God.

1857
01:25:58,160 --> 01:25:59,810
Thanks for showing up.

1858
01:26:00,640 --> 01:26:03,803
Really. But you should
probably leave

1859
01:26:03,960 --> 01:26:07,851
insignificance that you even
came here in the first place.

1860
01:26:09,440 --> 01:26:10,851
I'd love to get
a picture with you.

1861
01:26:11,320 --> 01:26:12,446
Yeah.

1862
01:26:12,640 --> 01:26:14,290
Great. Okay.

1863
01:26:14,760 --> 01:26:15,966
Just gonna stand on this.

1864
01:26:16,120 --> 01:26:18,168
Yeah, you know
the drill. Come on.

1865
01:26:18,360 --> 01:26:20,124
Come on. Here we go.

1866
01:26:20,440 --> 01:26:22,727
Gotta turn it around here.

1867
01:26:25,840 --> 01:26:28,127
Dad, you're not taking it.

1868
01:26:30,600 --> 01:26:32,045
What?

1869
01:26:33,120 --> 01:26:35,441
I'll remember this.

1870
01:26:35,880 --> 01:26:37,086
Come on.

1871
01:26:37,240 --> 01:26:38,730
Oh, my God!

1872
01:26:39,400 --> 01:26:40,401
What's up, gawd?

1873
01:26:40,520 --> 01:26:45,287
So, I just, uh, parented
the shit outta Sam.

1874
01:26:45,960 --> 01:26:47,086
And I feel, uh...

1875
01:26:47,720 --> 01:26:49,404
Oh, God, like, uh,

1876
01:26:49,760 --> 01:26:51,489
pride, I think?
That's it.

1877
01:26:51,680 --> 01:26:52,681
It's new.

1878
01:26:53,400 --> 01:26:54,925
Good for you, man.
Thanks.

1879
01:26:55,080 --> 01:26:56,320
Well done, my friend.
Thank you.

1880
01:26:56,480 --> 01:26:57,481
Well done.

1881
01:26:57,560 --> 01:26:59,005
How'd it go with Kayla?

1882
01:26:59,680 --> 01:27:00,681
Put Connor through a wall.

1883
01:27:01,440 --> 01:27:02,487
Are you serious?

1884
01:27:02,560 --> 01:27:04,130
Yeah. He's okay.

1885
01:27:04,320 --> 01:27:06,163
Yeah, he's lighter
than I thought.

1886
01:27:07,040 --> 01:27:08,451
Hey-

1887
01:27:08,600 --> 01:27:09,601
Hi.

1888
01:27:09,760 --> 01:27:11,330
So, Julie's, um...

1889
01:27:12,120 --> 01:27:13,724
Julie's having sex right now.

1890
01:27:13,880 --> 01:27:16,167
Okay. And sit down.
Wowed.

1891
01:27:16,320 --> 01:27:17,560
Yeah.

1892
01:27:17,720 --> 01:27:18,721
But it's good.

1893
01:27:18,920 --> 01:27:21,526
It's fine, right? I mean, you
have to do that eventually.

1894
01:27:21,680 --> 01:27:22,681
Right?

1895
01:27:22,760 --> 01:27:24,205
Are you good?
Yeah.

1896
01:27:24,360 --> 01:27:27,603
They seem like they really like each other
and that's nice. That's a good thing,

1897
01:27:27,800 --> 01:27:30,326
but it's just a little,
you know, scary,

1898
01:27:30,480 --> 01:27:34,371
because what if he doesn't know how
to do it right? You know, like,

1899
01:27:34,560 --> 01:27:36,210
what if he doesn't know
where to put it.

1900
01:27:36,360 --> 01:27:38,010
But he knows, right?
Should I go back up there?

1901
01:27:38,160 --> 01:27:39,844
No! No, no, no, no.
No, he'll figure it out.

1902
01:27:40,000 --> 01:27:41,001
It's one or the other.

1903
01:27:41,360 --> 01:27:42,885
Nope. Stay right here.

1904
01:27:43,920 --> 01:27:45,490
Do you wanna have
a drink right now?

1905
01:27:47,120 --> 01:27:48,451
Like, hang out?

1906
01:27:48,600 --> 01:27:49,601
Yeah.

1907
01:27:50,360 --> 01:27:51,725
Yes, I do.

1908
01:27:51,880 --> 01:27:53,928
I'm in. I'm definitely in.

1909
01:27:54,640 --> 01:27:56,642
Um, we will be having some
shots of alcohol, please.

1910
01:27:56,720 --> 01:27:57,721
Yes, we will.

1911
01:27:57,800 --> 01:27:58,961
This is crazy.

1912
01:28:00,600 --> 01:28:01,726
Well, I'm gonna, uh...

1913
01:28:02,640 --> 01:28:05,564
I'll let you guys have your
fun, and I will, uh...

1914
01:28:06,080 --> 01:28:08,128
I'm... I'm gonna
see you guys around.

1915
01:28:13,640 --> 01:28:14,641
Hey!

1916
01:28:16,720 --> 01:28:17,721
You, too.

1917
01:28:19,720 --> 01:28:20,721
Yeah.

1918
01:28:21,480 --> 01:28:22,766
Right!

1919
01:28:22,920 --> 01:28:24,251
Fuck,yeah!

1920
01:28:24,440 --> 01:28:25,646
Piaf accolade.

1921
01:28:25,800 --> 01:28:27,325
Just get him a shot.

1922
01:28:29,000 --> 01:28:30,365
Cheers!

1923
01:28:30,480 --> 01:28:31,481
What a night, guys.

1924
01:28:31,560 --> 01:28:32,766
That's beautiful.

1925
01:28:35,880 --> 01:28:40,442
So, I don't think the kid at the lake
house was actually butt-chugging.

1926
01:28:40,600 --> 01:28:41,601
Definitely.
Yeah.

1927
01:28:41,760 --> 01:28:43,000
What?
Yeah.

1928
01:28:43,160 --> 01:28:45,527
And so he threw me
through a table...

1929
01:28:45,680 --> 01:28:47,921
- I'm so sorry.
- No, it was cool.

1930
01:28:48,080 --> 01:28:49,844
I kinda feel fine. It's cool.
All right, see you.

1931
01:28:50,000 --> 01:28:51,001
See you.

1932
01:28:51,120 --> 01:28:52,087
Hey, guys.

1933
01:28:52,200 --> 01:28:54,567
- Austin, uh, let's go get a drink, man.
- Yeah, sure.

1934
01:28:54,920 --> 01:28:55,921
Want a fry?

1935
01:28:56,000 --> 01:28:57,240
So badly.

1936
01:28:59,600 --> 01:29:01,284
Can I have a fry, too?

1937
01:29:01,720 --> 01:29:03,245
Yeah!
Yes.

1938
01:29:04,240 --> 01:29:05,605
So?

1939
01:29:06,640 --> 01:29:08,449
I couldn't
go through with it.

1940
01:29:08,600 --> 01:29:11,331
Yeah, didn’t. No.

1941
01:29:15,120 --> 01:29:16,565
Holy shit.

1942
01:29:16,720 --> 01:29:17,960
You're a woman amongst girls.

1943
01:29:18,160 --> 01:29:19,924
Julie!
Congrats-fuck-ululations.

1944
01:29:20,120 --> 01:29:21,167
Thank you.
How was it?

1945
01:29:21,240 --> 01:29:22,241
Honestly,

1946
01:29:22,320 --> 01:29:25,688
it was a little painful, kinda
fast, and kinda awkward...

1947
01:29:26,240 --> 01:29:27,321
But absolutely perfect.

1948
01:29:27,640 --> 01:29:28,721
AW!

1949
01:29:30,160 --> 01:29:33,004
You guys, so much
went down tonight.

1950
01:29:33,160 --> 01:29:34,161
I know.
Including...

1951
01:29:35,120 --> 01:29:36,121
Connor!

1952
01:29:36,280 --> 01:29:38,203
No!
Let's just say...

1953
01:29:38,280 --> 01:29:42,046
The Chef went out to eat my pussy.

1954
01:29:43,360 --> 01:29:44,646
It was good.

1955
01:29:44,760 --> 01:29:48,048
DJ Chad- Is that Chad?

1956
01:29:48,200 --> 01:29:49,361
That's Chad.
That's Chad.

1957
01:29:49,520 --> 01:29:50,806
Chad!

1958
01:29:50,960 --> 01:29:52,644
Scream
my name Yes, Chad!

1959
01:29:52,760 --> 01:29:53,761
Fuck yeah, Chad!

1960
01:29:53,880 --> 01:29:54,927
<i>I love me</i>

1961
01:29:55,080 --> 01:29:57,924
<i>Gonna love myself No, I
don't need anybody else</i>

1962
01:29:58,000 --> 01:29:59,001
He)'

1963
01:29:59,120 --> 01:30:01,521
<i>Gonna love myself
No, I don't need anybody else</i>

1964
01:30:01,600 --> 01:30:02,647
<i>I love</i> me...

1965
01:30:09,720 --> 01:30:11,006
Guys, I gotta
tell you something.

1966
01:30:11,160 --> 01:30:12,161
Okay-

1967
01:30:16,320 --> 01:30:17,321
Really?

1968
01:30:17,400 --> 01:30:18,606
Yeah.
Wait, you are?

1969
01:30:19,200 --> 01:30:20,361
Yeah.

1970
01:30:21,000 --> 01:30:23,002
I love you. Forever.

1971
01:30:24,080 --> 01:30:25,241
And you, too.

1972
01:30:25,480 --> 01:30:27,005
Oh, my God!

1973
01:30:27,120 --> 01:30:28,121
I love you.

1974
01:30:28,200 --> 01:30:29,201
Sam!

1975
01:30:29,280 --> 01:30:30,441
Excuse me.

1976
01:30:30,600 --> 01:30:31,726
I can't believe
you didn't tell us!

1977
01:30:31,880 --> 01:30:33,086
Y <i>I</i>
ay"

1978
01:30:33,160 --> 01:30:34,366
Ta-DA-DA-DA!
Aw.

1979
01:30:37,560 --> 01:30:38,561
Oh, hey!
Hey.

1980
01:30:38,720 --> 01:30:40,085
Hey!
Hi.

1981
01:30:40,840 --> 01:30:41,887
Oh.

1982
01:30:41,960 --> 01:30:44,850
Uh, Julie, I think we got
something over here.

1983
01:30:47,040 --> 01:30:48,166
Dope cape.

1984
01:30:51,160 --> 01:30:54,926
I'm not misreading things.

1985
01:31:19,600 --> 01:31:21,921
So you'll call me every day
till you get to L.A., right?

1986
01:31:22,120 --> 01:31:23,804
Yeah, and then, like,
every day after that.

1987
01:31:23,960 --> 01:31:26,042
Okay.
I'm gonna miss you so much.

1988
01:31:26,360 --> 01:31:27,885
You're gonna be okay, though.

1989
01:31:28,280 --> 01:31:29,281
Are you gonna be okay?

1990
01:31:29,360 --> 01:31:32,762
Yeah, I'm fine. It's the
weirdest thing because

1991
01:31:32,960 --> 01:31:37,602
I have been worried
about this day for 18 years.

1992
01:31:37,800 --> 01:31:39,290
And then

1993
01:31:39,440 --> 01:31:43,206
I wake up this morning
and... Nothing.

1994
01:31:43,360 --> 01:31:47,081
Like, I don't feel emotional at all.
I just feel like...

1995
01:31:47,240 --> 01:31:50,562
It's so bizarre.
What is that?

1996
01:31:50,720 --> 01:31:52,484
It's, like, splashing on me.
I know.

1997
01:31:52,640 --> 01:31:54,449
Isn't that so strange?
Yeah.

1998
01:31:57,440 --> 01:31:58,566
I love you, Mom.

1999
01:31:59,360 --> 01:32:00,646
I love you.

2000
01:32:03,160 --> 01:32:04,525
No, I have money. Like...

2001
01:32:04,680 --> 01:32:06,569
Lisa, tell him
I can afford... Mmm.

2002
01:32:07,080 --> 01:32:08,809
Sorry, sorry.

2003
01:32:09,000 --> 01:32:10,843
All right, come on.

2004
01:32:11,040 --> 01:32:13,168
Let's get this road trip started!

2005
01:32:13,320 --> 01:32:14,367
I love you.

2006
01:32:15,720 --> 01:32:16,846
Okay-

2007
01:32:17,000 --> 01:32:19,002
Hold on.
Let me take a video.

2008
01:32:29,360 --> 01:32:31,249
<i>- I love you.
- I love you.</i>

2009
01:32:31,440 --> 01:32:32,965
<i>Bye, Mom.</i>

2010
01:32:33,840 --> 01:32:35,046
- I love you. Mush.
- Okay, bye.

2011
01:32:35,120 --> 01:32:37,088
See ya.
Drop Julie off in Cali

2012
01:32:37,280 --> 01:32:39,089
and then you and Kayla come right
back home, and text, please.

2013
01:32:39,280 --> 01:32:40,805
- That's a big maybe.
- Please.

2014
01:32:40,960 --> 01:32:42,610
Hey, take care of
my mom, you two. Okay?

2015
01:32:42,760 --> 01:32:44,046
- We will. All right.
- Later, big guy.

2016
01:32:44,160 --> 01:32:45,161
I'm going to college!

2017
01:32:45,240 --> 01:32:47,368
Drive careful, young man.
That's precious cargo.

2018
01:32:47,440 --> 01:32:49,329
I love you!

2019
01:32:50,520 --> 01:32:51,521
Awe.

2020
01:32:51,600 --> 01:32:52,601
Come on.
Guys.

2021
01:32:52,680 --> 01:32:54,205
- Come on. We did it.
- We did it.

2022
01:32:55,240 --> 01:32:56,969
We did it. We parented.

2023
01:32:57,120 --> 01:32:58,804
We did it.
We did it.

2024
01:33:01,720 --> 01:33:03,529
Op! It's Julie.

2025
01:33:03,720 --> 01:33:07,486
Oh, I must have been accidentally
added to the group conversation.

2026
01:33:07,680 --> 01:33:09,330
Oh, well,
should probably leave.

2027
01:33:09,520 --> 01:33:11,284
"Can't believe we're on
our own now."

2028
01:33:11,360 --> 01:33:12,566
Aw, that's sweet.
Yeah.

2029
01:33:12,680 --> 01:33:14,205
"We're gonna get lit AF."

2030
01:33:15,000 --> 01:33:17,731
"Lit AF."
That's not great.

2031
01:33:17,880 --> 01:33:20,486
No, that's... They're gonna get literature.
African literature.

2032
01:33:20,640 --> 01:33:21,721
You think that's what "lit AF" means?
You think

2033
01:33:21,840 --> 01:33:22,841
they're talking to each other about...
Lit AF.

2034
01:33:22,920 --> 01:33:24,843
"Can The Chef get us..."

2035
01:33:25,200 --> 01:33:26,201
Trees?
What the hell's trees?

2036
01:33:26,360 --> 01:33:28,328
Trees mean weed, I told you that.
Mushrooms. Pills.

2037
01:33:28,480 --> 01:33:30,642
No, the pills are Kayla's allergy.
That's Claritin.

2038
01:33:30,800 --> 01:33:32,962
It's not Claritin. Look,
snowflakes. That's blow.

2039
01:33:33,120 --> 01:33:35,726
"Hash tag, no parents, no rules.
Hash tag, mad drugs.

2040
01:33:35,920 --> 01:33:38,446
"Hash tag, no condoms"?

2041
01:33:38,720 --> 01:33:39,926
Why would
they hash tag that?

2042
01:33:40,080 --> 01:33:42,162
Wait, is that a needle
and an eggplant?

2043
01:33:42,640 --> 01:33:45,371
What, are they gonna inject
heroin into some guy's dick?

2044
01:33:45,480 --> 01:33:46,481
Let's go.
Let's get in the car.

2045
01:33:46,560 --> 01:33:48,005
I'll drive.
I'm sitting behind you.

2046
01:33:48,080 --> 01:33:49,969
Wait, wait, wait!

2047
01:33:50,120 --> 01:33:52,122
<i>We're
just messing with you! Ha-ha!</i>

2048
01:33:53,520 --> 01:33:55,443
"We love you guys,
don't worry."

2049
01:33:56,800 --> 01:33:59,804
You guys were so ranked!
I was in on it.

2050
01:33:59,880 --> 01:34:00,881
You didn't know.

2051
01:34:00,960 --> 01:34:02,041
No, no, I did. I didn't know
it was coming right now.

2052
01:34:02,240 --> 01:34:03,287
That's why I kinda
sold it so well.

2053
01:34:03,440 --> 01:34:05,169
But it doesn't matter.
You guys were like...

2054
01:34:05,320 --> 01:34:06,765
"Holy shit!"

2055
01:34:07,200 --> 01:34:08,486
Yeah.

2056
01:34:26,800 --> 01:34:28,086
Damn it, Mitchell!

2057
01:34:28,640 --> 01:34:29,641
Marco?

2058
01:34:31,000 --> 01:34:32,001
Polo.

2059
01:34:33,640 --> 01:34:35,642
Mitchell, are you
getting a snack?

2060
01:34:37,440 --> 01:34:40,489
I'm so glad we can do stuff like
this now that Kayla's in college.

2061
01:34:40,640 --> 01:34:42,847
I have no idea
where you are.

2062
01:34:43,040 --> 01:34:45,850
I'm gonna do so much stuff
to you when I find you.

2063
01:34:45,920 --> 01:34:47,410
Oh. Oh.

2064
01:34:47,480 --> 01:34:48,561
Marco.
Polo.

2065
01:34:48,840 --> 01:34:49,966
Ah! Ah!
Polo!

2066
01:34:50,160 --> 01:34:51,446
I can't believe it,
it took you forever!

2067
01:34:51,600 --> 01:34:53,443
I spent so much time
on the stairs!

2068
01:34:53,600 --> 01:34:55,364
We're doing this. I know.
We're, like, totally doing it.

2069
01:34:55,520 --> 01:34:57,284
Let's just get crazy. I don't know!
It's hot. HOV!

2070
01:34:57,680 --> 01:35:00,763
I want you to grab my balls,
like Ron likes it, like hard.