1 00:01:20,455 --> 00:01:22,664 (THUNDER CRACKING) 2 00:01:55,323 --> 00:01:56,990 Welcome! Welcome! 3 00:01:57,075 --> 00:02:00,202 Congrats, Drac. Holy smokes, everybody's here. 4 00:02:01,204 --> 00:02:04,289 Mr. and Mrs. Loughran, the parents of the groom, and family. 5 00:02:04,374 --> 00:02:05,415 (CHUCKLING) 6 00:02:09,462 --> 00:02:10,838 - Mom and Dad! - Johnny! 7 00:02:10,922 --> 00:02:13,090 I can't believe you're all here. 8 00:02:19,055 --> 00:02:20,055 (GIGGLING) 9 00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:31,400 (ALL EXCLAIMING) 10 00:02:34,863 --> 00:02:36,864 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah! (CHUCKLING) 11 00:02:37,740 --> 00:02:39,783 Yo, how hot is my date? 12 00:02:39,868 --> 00:02:41,535 GRIFFIN: So hot. Wow. 13 00:02:41,619 --> 00:02:44,830 - How 'bout how hot mine is? - You got a date? 14 00:02:44,914 --> 00:02:48,000 Yeah. She's invisible. That's why you can't see her. 15 00:02:48,084 --> 00:02:51,003 - Oh, right. This is the one from "Canada"? - (GRIFFIN SHUSHES) 16 00:02:51,087 --> 00:02:52,212 Wedding's starting. 17 00:03:01,264 --> 00:03:02,264 Ah! 18 00:03:06,227 --> 00:03:07,227 ALL: Oh! 19 00:03:10,899 --> 00:03:11,899 ALL: Aw! 20 00:03:48,978 --> 00:03:50,687 (LAUGHING) Whoo-hoo! 21 00:03:51,481 --> 00:03:52,481 Great. 22 00:03:53,775 --> 00:03:54,775 (SPEAKING GIBBERISH) 23 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,491 True. So true, Marty. 24 00:04:02,659 --> 00:04:04,076 ALL: Aw! 25 00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:06,870 - (SCREAMING) - (CAMERAS CLICKING) 26 00:04:16,673 --> 00:04:17,714 (MR. BIGFOOT BELLOWING) 27 00:04:17,799 --> 00:04:19,383 Aw. How sweet. 28 00:04:22,178 --> 00:04:24,137 Oh, my. Look at you. (GASPS) 29 00:04:25,348 --> 00:04:26,556 (MUFFLED VOICE) Oh, my gosh. 30 00:04:27,767 --> 00:04:28,767 Oh. 31 00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:33,689 (CLEARS THROAT) 32 00:04:40,863 --> 00:04:44,116 Is it everything you wanted, my little poisonberry? 33 00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:45,909 Oh, it is, Daddy. 34 00:04:46,494 --> 00:04:48,453 Except where's Grandpa Vlad? 35 00:04:48,538 --> 00:04:51,331 Honey, your gramps would not have been cool with this. 36 00:04:51,416 --> 00:04:52,791 He's old-school. 37 00:04:52,875 --> 00:04:55,377 How do we know? If he could just meet Johnny... 38 00:04:55,461 --> 00:04:56,920 He would have eaten him. 39 00:04:57,005 --> 00:04:59,965 He's not as enlightened as your hip Daddy. 40 00:05:00,049 --> 00:05:03,176 So, you're really okay with him not being a monster? 41 00:05:03,261 --> 00:05:07,889 Human, monster, unicorn, as long as you're happy. 42 00:05:08,725 --> 00:05:10,183 Thanks, Dad. 43 00:05:12,437 --> 00:05:15,731 (SINGING) And you'll always be my moonlight 44 00:05:16,190 --> 00:05:19,401 But now on wings of love you soar 45 00:05:19,902 --> 00:05:22,571 Now that you're Johnny's girl 46 00:05:23,031 --> 00:05:24,114 Johnny's girl 47 00:05:24,198 --> 00:05:26,658 And kind of Daddy's, too 48 00:05:26,743 --> 00:05:28,577 Your mom would be so happy 49 00:05:28,661 --> 00:05:30,746 'Cause she always knew 50 00:05:30,830 --> 00:05:36,168 Love is making room for all the best in you 51 00:05:36,252 --> 00:05:37,252 (APPLAUDING) 52 00:05:40,048 --> 00:05:41,882 (MR. BIGFOOT CRYING) 53 00:05:51,934 --> 00:05:52,934 (HUMMING) 54 00:05:55,646 --> 00:05:57,689 - Hey, Dad. - Oh, hey, guys! 55 00:05:57,774 --> 00:05:59,483 Todd, take a break. 56 00:06:03,279 --> 00:06:04,279 So, what's up? 57 00:06:04,364 --> 00:06:07,866 Mavis was wondering if maybe you wanted to go for a fly. 58 00:06:07,950 --> 00:06:12,120 Oh. We haven't done that in forever. Any special reason? 59 00:06:12,288 --> 00:06:14,289 No special reason at all. (GIGGLES) 60 00:06:14,916 --> 00:06:16,416 - Right, Mavey? - (CHUCKLES) 61 00:06:17,126 --> 00:06:19,378 - What's his deal? - He's silly. 62 00:06:19,462 --> 00:06:21,588 It's just a beautiful night, and... 63 00:06:21,672 --> 00:06:23,215 Well, if you don't want to... 64 00:06:23,299 --> 00:06:24,716 No, no! Are you kidding? 65 00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:27,594 I would eat a bucket of garlic to fly with you. 66 00:06:52,161 --> 00:06:53,161 (DRACULA LAUGHING) 67 00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:05,507 Oh, honey, look at those fluffy clouds. 68 00:07:06,843 --> 00:07:09,261 Remember what we played when you were little? 69 00:07:09,345 --> 00:07:11,680 Hide and Go Seek Sharp Objects? 70 00:07:12,181 --> 00:07:16,351 Okay. Regular Hide and Go Seek. 71 00:07:16,811 --> 00:07:17,811 (MAVIS CHUCKLES) 72 00:07:18,646 --> 00:07:20,355 Where are you? 73 00:07:21,566 --> 00:07:22,607 (MAVIS CHUCKLES) 74 00:07:23,151 --> 00:07:24,526 Honeybat! 75 00:07:26,612 --> 00:07:27,779 Mavey! 76 00:07:29,532 --> 00:07:31,032 Honeybat! 77 00:07:32,201 --> 00:07:34,703 I'm gonna get you. 78 00:07:37,832 --> 00:07:38,832 (MAVIS PANTING) 79 00:07:40,334 --> 00:07:42,335 Honey? Are you okay? 80 00:07:42,462 --> 00:07:46,548 (SIGHING) Yes. It's just a little harder to catch my breath since I'm pregnant. 81 00:07:46,674 --> 00:07:49,342 Yes, well, I guess that would make it more... 82 00:07:49,427 --> 00:07:50,469 What? 83 00:07:54,098 --> 00:07:55,098 (GASPS) 84 00:07:55,641 --> 00:07:56,641 (CHEERING) 85 00:07:57,560 --> 00:08:00,187 I'm gonna be a grandpa! (ECHOING) 86 00:08:01,898 --> 00:08:04,900 JONATHAN: And I'm gonna be a dad! 87 00:08:06,194 --> 00:08:09,154 (SINGING) 'Cause you're Daddy's girl, or boy 88 00:08:09,238 --> 00:08:11,740 Daddy's girl, or boy 89 00:08:12,116 --> 00:08:13,825 I'm hungry again, honey. 90 00:08:13,910 --> 00:08:16,036 Can you get me some ice cream with anchovies? 91 00:08:17,747 --> 00:08:20,332 No, no, no. You mustn't give in to your cravings. 92 00:08:20,416 --> 00:08:22,417 It's not good for the baby. 93 00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:26,171 You need to increase your spider intake, so he'll be able to climb ceilings properly. 94 00:08:26,255 --> 00:08:29,758 - And eat lots of sheep bile. - (BLEATING) 95 00:08:29,967 --> 00:08:33,678 I love you, Dad, but we don't even know if the kid's gonna be a vampire. 96 00:08:33,763 --> 00:08:36,681 I'd be thrilled if the baby's human-y, just like Johnny. 97 00:08:36,766 --> 00:08:40,143 "Human-y. " With thousands of years of Dracula genes. 98 00:08:40,228 --> 00:08:41,436 Not gonna happen. 99 00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:43,271 As long as the baby's healthy. 100 00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:46,942 - Of course. A healthy little vampire. - Or human. 101 00:08:47,026 --> 00:08:49,778 Yes, a human who can fly as a bat. 102 00:08:50,112 --> 00:08:52,864 Here. Just have some monster ball soup. 103 00:08:52,949 --> 00:08:54,950 It's your mommy's recipe. 104 00:08:57,787 --> 00:08:58,787 Aw! 105 00:08:59,247 --> 00:09:00,747 Thank you, Dad. 106 00:09:01,123 --> 00:09:04,751 Just like you made it when I was a kid. My favorite. (CRYING) 107 00:09:16,514 --> 00:09:17,556 Sorry. 108 00:09:32,321 --> 00:09:35,407 Sir, only the father is allowed in the delivery room. 109 00:09:35,491 --> 00:09:37,784 Really? I mean, okay. 110 00:09:37,868 --> 00:09:40,161 He's the family, I guess. 111 00:09:41,831 --> 00:09:42,831 (CRYING) 112 00:09:45,501 --> 00:09:48,753 Oh, look! It's a boy! It's a boy! 113 00:09:48,838 --> 00:09:51,881 The Dracula bloodline carries on! 114 00:09:52,466 --> 00:09:55,969 No one will ever harm you as long as I'm here, 115 00:09:56,053 --> 00:09:57,846 my little devil dog. 116 00:09:58,306 --> 00:09:59,973 Dad, can I hold my baby? 117 00:10:00,057 --> 00:10:02,100 If I were Dad, I'd say yes. 118 00:10:02,184 --> 00:10:04,811 But I'm the nurse, Francine. 119 00:10:04,895 --> 00:10:06,646 Here you go anyway. 120 00:10:06,897 --> 00:10:07,897 (GROANING) 121 00:10:09,275 --> 00:10:10,275 (KISSING) 122 00:10:10,943 --> 00:10:11,943 (GROWLING) 123 00:10:12,361 --> 00:10:15,488 My bad. 124 00:10:16,824 --> 00:10:17,824 - (GIGGLING) - (APPLAUDING) 125 00:10:19,410 --> 00:10:22,162 Little Dennis is a year old now. Wow! 126 00:10:23,331 --> 00:10:25,123 - (BLOWS A RASPBERRY) - (LAUGHS) 127 00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:28,209 Nice. Yeah. Cute kid. 128 00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:34,215 Okay, time for presents, guys. 129 00:10:34,383 --> 00:10:37,969 All right! Let's do this boy up! 130 00:10:38,054 --> 00:10:40,055 Check out what I got him. Bling! 131 00:10:40,389 --> 00:10:42,140 Wow. Is it cursed? 132 00:10:42,224 --> 00:10:44,267 Super cursed. Only the best. 133 00:10:44,352 --> 00:10:46,102 Straight from the crypt. 134 00:10:46,395 --> 00:10:50,315 He's just starting to walk, so maybe it's heavier than... 135 00:10:50,399 --> 00:10:51,399 (CRYING) 136 00:10:52,443 --> 00:10:54,819 Oh. You're okay, Denisovich. 137 00:10:54,904 --> 00:10:57,614 His name is Dennis. Named after my father. 138 00:10:57,698 --> 00:10:59,783 It's not his vampire name. 139 00:10:59,867 --> 00:11:02,202 My little Denisovichy-Weesovichy. 140 00:11:02,286 --> 00:11:04,996 Huh! Are we sure he's a vampire? 141 00:11:05,081 --> 00:11:06,623 I mean, not that it's a bad thing, 142 00:11:06,707 --> 00:11:10,919 but shouldn't he have fangs and that pasty skin you guys have? 143 00:11:11,045 --> 00:11:14,214 Technically, you have until you're five to get your vampire fangs. 144 00:11:14,590 --> 00:11:16,841 Oh, he'll get his fangs. He's a Dracula. 145 00:11:16,926 --> 00:11:18,677 He's also half Loughran. 146 00:11:18,761 --> 00:11:21,888 Maybe he'd be better off where we live. There's more humans there. 147 00:11:21,972 --> 00:11:25,809 What? Look how well he's playing with the wolf pups. 148 00:11:26,936 --> 00:11:27,936 (SLURPING) 149 00:11:28,979 --> 00:11:32,732 We have a present. I hope it's acceptable. 150 00:11:33,401 --> 00:11:35,193 "My First Guillotine. " 151 00:11:35,277 --> 00:11:38,321 Very educational. Well played, Frank. 152 00:11:38,406 --> 00:11:42,117 It's great. Thank you. We just have to baby-proof that. 153 00:11:43,786 --> 00:11:46,621 Johnny, do you know where you put the rubber guards? 154 00:11:47,456 --> 00:11:49,249 Baby-proofing a guillotine? 155 00:11:49,333 --> 00:11:52,752 So you cut your finger off. It's part of the fun. 156 00:11:52,837 --> 00:11:55,255 She made me baby-proof the whole hotel. 157 00:11:55,339 --> 00:11:58,007 Someone's overprotective. 158 00:12:10,146 --> 00:12:11,146 Aah! 159 00:12:11,480 --> 00:12:12,522 Hmm? 160 00:12:18,904 --> 00:12:19,904 (SIGHS) 161 00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:24,868 MAVIS: Johnny! Come quick! 162 00:12:24,994 --> 00:12:25,994 (PANTING) 163 00:12:27,538 --> 00:12:28,913 What's up? He's okay? 164 00:12:29,331 --> 00:12:30,957 - Dennis said his first word! - (CHUCKLING) 165 00:12:31,333 --> 00:12:32,500 He did? 166 00:12:32,710 --> 00:12:34,711 Come on, honey. Say it again. 167 00:12:34,795 --> 00:12:35,962 Bleh, bleh-bleh. 168 00:12:37,006 --> 00:12:39,841 I don't say, "Bleh, bleh-bleh. " 169 00:12:40,634 --> 00:12:42,302 We didn't say you did. 170 00:12:42,386 --> 00:12:44,846 - Then where did he get that? - Bleh, bleh-bleh. 171 00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:47,015 Well, maybe sometimes you say it. 172 00:12:47,183 --> 00:12:49,601 I only say it when I say I don't say it! 173 00:12:49,935 --> 00:12:51,186 Bleh, bleh-bleh. 174 00:12:51,353 --> 00:12:53,980 Okay, kid. We get it. You can talk. 175 00:12:55,357 --> 00:12:57,275 Denisovich. 176 00:12:58,402 --> 00:13:01,029 - MAVIS: Dad. - Just checking for cavities. 177 00:13:04,366 --> 00:13:07,160 - Bleh, bleh-bleh. - Bleh, bleh-bleh. 178 00:13:07,661 --> 00:13:09,287 It was you! 179 00:13:09,705 --> 00:13:10,705 (MUSIC PLAYING) 180 00:13:15,044 --> 00:13:17,128 - (PHONE RINGING) - (MR. BIGFOOT LAUGHING) 181 00:13:19,715 --> 00:13:21,132 HUMAN FLY: Oh, my goodness, Leonard. 182 00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:24,803 If you really looked that hideous, I don't think I could hang out with you. 183 00:13:24,887 --> 00:13:26,346 - (CHUCKLING) - Guys, what's the deal? 184 00:13:26,430 --> 00:13:28,848 Is this a party? Pick up a phone. 185 00:13:29,183 --> 00:13:34,229 I don't care if Johnny said it's a "cool app. " Johnny's still new here. 186 00:13:34,563 --> 00:13:37,982 Now, Porridge Head, did you call a hearse for the Gremlinbergs? 187 00:13:38,067 --> 00:13:41,486 No, you're checking your Facebook page. Again. 188 00:13:41,570 --> 00:13:44,948 Drac, I told the guys social media is the best way to promote the hotel. 189 00:13:45,032 --> 00:13:46,574 - Right, Clifton? - (GROANS) 190 00:13:47,910 --> 00:13:50,328 So, Drac, I wanted to go through some thoughts I had, 191 00:13:50,412 --> 00:13:53,498 as your new human relations coordinating co-assistant. 192 00:13:53,582 --> 00:13:54,666 Sure. It's a real job. 193 00:13:54,750 --> 00:13:58,044 Not a cheap excuse to keep Mavis happy, so you never leave here. 194 00:13:58,128 --> 00:14:00,296 Right. So, I was thinking, 195 00:14:00,381 --> 00:14:04,592 since we have so many humans now, maybe update some of the acts? 196 00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:06,052 Like, maybe the magician? 197 00:14:06,136 --> 00:14:07,971 What's wrong with Harry Three-Eye? 198 00:14:08,055 --> 00:14:11,099 Well, he might be a little old-school for the humans. 199 00:14:11,308 --> 00:14:13,351 Tell me, sir, what was your card? 200 00:14:13,435 --> 00:14:15,228 The three of spades? 201 00:14:16,939 --> 00:14:19,440 Is this your card, my friend? 202 00:14:20,109 --> 00:14:21,067 Whoa! 203 00:14:21,151 --> 00:14:22,151 (ALL EXCLAIMING) 204 00:14:23,153 --> 00:14:24,654 No, Harry's great. 205 00:14:24,738 --> 00:14:27,115 Can't blame Harry for the crowd not being hip. 206 00:14:27,241 --> 00:14:28,867 Okay, what about Wayne? 207 00:14:28,951 --> 00:14:30,743 Wayne? Are you nuts? He's my boy. 208 00:14:30,828 --> 00:14:32,579 Then maybe something other than tennis? 209 00:14:32,997 --> 00:14:34,706 Okay, so, what you wanna do 210 00:14:34,790 --> 00:14:38,710 is lift the racket right on impact, so you get that nice top spin. 211 00:14:38,794 --> 00:14:40,420 Try and hit one. 212 00:14:41,338 --> 00:14:42,338 (BARKING) 213 00:14:47,469 --> 00:14:48,428 (PANTING) 214 00:14:48,512 --> 00:14:51,764 - (CELL PHONE VIBRATING) - What is that? What's the noise? It's on me! 215 00:14:51,849 --> 00:14:53,600 It's just the cell phone I got you. 216 00:14:53,684 --> 00:14:56,978 Clifton's sending you a text so you can practice how to write back. 217 00:14:57,062 --> 00:14:58,479 - (CELL PHONE CHIMES) - Oh! 218 00:14:59,815 --> 00:15:00,857 Eh... 219 00:15:00,941 --> 00:15:03,610 - What the... It's not doing it. - I got it. 220 00:15:04,278 --> 00:15:05,278 (JONATHAN READING) 221 00:15:08,824 --> 00:15:10,116 Now you can text Clifton. 222 00:15:10,993 --> 00:15:12,493 All right, fine. 223 00:15:13,537 --> 00:15:16,080 - How do you do this? - JONATHAN: Maybe it's your fingernails. 224 00:15:16,165 --> 00:15:18,583 It's easy. Look. I'll text Mavis. 225 00:15:18,667 --> 00:15:21,210 Psyched for date night. 226 00:15:21,295 --> 00:15:23,755 - (CELL PHONE CHIMES) - See? And now look, she texted right back. 227 00:15:23,839 --> 00:15:26,341 "Gotta cancel. Can't leave Dennis. " 228 00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:27,884 Okay. 229 00:15:27,968 --> 00:15:32,680 Are we never allowed to be alone again? 230 00:15:32,848 --> 00:15:36,809 I need to feel loved, too. 231 00:15:36,894 --> 00:15:38,394 And send. 232 00:15:39,188 --> 00:15:42,607 Okay. All that taught me is that you're pathetic. 233 00:15:42,691 --> 00:15:45,068 Yeah, got it. Maybe you should just get Bluetooth. 234 00:15:45,152 --> 00:15:47,779 Okay. Blue Tooth, come over here. 235 00:15:50,574 --> 00:15:51,991 So, now what? 236 00:15:56,372 --> 00:15:58,748 Rise and shine, my Denisovich. 237 00:15:58,832 --> 00:16:00,124 Hi, Papa. 238 00:16:00,209 --> 00:16:03,628 Hello, my little devil. Did you have sweet nightmares? 239 00:16:03,712 --> 00:16:07,465 Uh-huh. I dreamed that I saw a stegosaurus. 240 00:16:07,549 --> 00:16:10,051 Oh... And were you drinking his blood? 241 00:16:10,552 --> 00:16:13,096 - No. - Just throwing it out there. 242 00:16:13,180 --> 00:16:16,432 - Hey! You want to do something cool? - Yeah! (CHUCKLES) 243 00:16:17,226 --> 00:16:21,729 I'm going to teach you how to turn into a bat. Like me. 244 00:16:21,939 --> 00:16:23,898 - See? - (CHUCKLES) Cool. 245 00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:25,900 Yes! Cool, like I said. 246 00:16:26,360 --> 00:16:27,860 Now you try. 247 00:16:28,362 --> 00:16:29,612 I'm a bat. (GIGGLES) 248 00:16:29,905 --> 00:16:32,073 I'm a bat. I'm a bat. I'm a bat. 249 00:16:32,157 --> 00:16:33,408 I'm a bat. 250 00:16:33,909 --> 00:16:37,078 - I mean, a real bat. - I'm a bat! 251 00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:38,162 (BLOWS A RASPBERRY) 252 00:16:38,747 --> 00:16:43,459 Denisovich. Take a breath. You can really turn into a bat. 253 00:16:43,544 --> 00:16:45,920 Try. Feel the bat. 254 00:16:48,048 --> 00:16:49,757 Not a chicken. 255 00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:53,720 What's that? The electric boogaloo? 256 00:16:53,804 --> 00:16:57,015 If I show you I can bust a move, will you try to fly, then? 257 00:16:57,099 --> 00:16:58,057 Uh-huh. 258 00:16:58,142 --> 00:16:59,142 (MUSIC PLAYING) 259 00:17:12,781 --> 00:17:14,991 Dad? Why are you guys dancing? 260 00:17:15,784 --> 00:17:17,744 Uh, he was sleep-dancing. 261 00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:19,328 Come on, sweetie. Back to bed. 262 00:17:19,413 --> 00:17:22,165 "Back to bed"? It's already after 8:00 p. m. 263 00:17:22,249 --> 00:17:24,333 Don't you remember the new sleep schedule? 264 00:17:24,418 --> 00:17:26,753 - He's going to human classes half the day. - Uh... 265 00:17:26,837 --> 00:17:30,173 If he could just sleep till 2:00 a. m. tonight, it'd be so great for him. 266 00:17:30,257 --> 00:17:34,218 But, honeydeath, six of Wayne's wolf pups are having a birthday party tonight. 267 00:17:34,303 --> 00:17:36,012 You wouldn't want him to miss that. 268 00:17:36,096 --> 00:17:40,308 Dad, I love the wolf pups, but they're a little too rough for Dennis. 269 00:17:40,392 --> 00:17:44,353 - "Too rough"? - Haven't you noticed? Dennis is different. 270 00:17:44,438 --> 00:17:47,523 What are you saying? Denisovich shouldn't be around monsters? 271 00:17:47,608 --> 00:17:50,610 - I love monsters! Video! Video! - Ha! 272 00:17:50,694 --> 00:17:53,196 Oh, you wanna show Papa Drac your monster video? 273 00:17:53,280 --> 00:17:54,280 Yeah! (CHUCKLES) 274 00:17:56,742 --> 00:17:59,243 MAN ON TV: Who's the coolest monster? 275 00:17:59,328 --> 00:18:00,870 ALL: Kakie! 276 00:18:00,954 --> 00:18:04,040 Wee! Kakie one happy monster! 277 00:18:04,124 --> 00:18:06,501 Kakie love cake! Yummy! 278 00:18:06,585 --> 00:18:08,753 Tummy get a tummyache. 279 00:18:08,837 --> 00:18:12,256 Whoa, whoa, whoa. How is that a monster? 280 00:18:12,341 --> 00:18:14,425 KAKIE: Have some cake, Wuzzlelumplebum. 281 00:18:14,510 --> 00:18:18,262 Remember, kids, a real monster always shares. 282 00:18:18,347 --> 00:18:23,059 "Shares"? Yes! When I think monsters, I think "shares. " 283 00:18:23,143 --> 00:18:26,604 Now, let me tell you what a real monster is, Denisovich. 284 00:18:26,688 --> 00:18:31,025 Dad, please. He's practically five already. Don't force it. 285 00:18:34,571 --> 00:18:36,781 Slow down, Wuzzlelumplebum. 286 00:18:36,865 --> 00:18:40,576 (LAUGHING) 287 00:18:41,995 --> 00:18:45,623 (SINGING) Twinkle, twinkle, little star How I wonder 288 00:18:45,707 --> 00:18:47,959 Mommy, I'm too old for lullabies. 289 00:18:48,335 --> 00:18:50,378 What? That's not how that one goes. 290 00:18:50,462 --> 00:18:52,130 This is the way most people sing it. 291 00:18:52,214 --> 00:18:54,423 "Most people"? What's wrong with... 292 00:18:54,508 --> 00:18:57,844 (SINGING) Suffer, suffer, scream in pain 293 00:18:57,928 --> 00:19:01,097 Blood is spilling from your brain 294 00:19:01,181 --> 00:19:03,891 - Daddy. - Come on. You know how I sang it to you. 295 00:19:03,976 --> 00:19:07,395 (SINGING) Zombies gnaw you like a plum 296 00:19:07,479 --> 00:19:10,940 Piercing cries and you succumb 297 00:19:11,942 --> 00:19:16,070 Suffer, suffer, scream in pain 298 00:19:16,155 --> 00:19:21,492 You will never breathe again 299 00:19:23,453 --> 00:19:25,079 Still works. 300 00:19:32,045 --> 00:19:33,045 (MUSIC PLAYING) 301 00:19:38,677 --> 00:19:39,677 (CHILDREN CHUCKLING) 302 00:19:45,225 --> 00:19:46,225 Oh... 303 00:19:46,310 --> 00:19:47,310 (GASPS) 304 00:19:47,811 --> 00:19:52,148 DENNIS: Happy birthday, Wally, Wilson, Whoopi, Waylon, Weepy and Wanye. 305 00:19:52,232 --> 00:19:53,232 (SQUEAKING) 306 00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:56,611 - Denisovich! My big boy! You made it! - (LAUGHS) 307 00:19:57,321 --> 00:19:59,322 I thought about what you said, Dad. 308 00:19:59,406 --> 00:20:03,618 - Maybe I was being a little overprotective. - Thank you, coffin cake. 309 00:20:04,453 --> 00:20:06,162 Dennis! I love you! Zing! 310 00:20:06,246 --> 00:20:07,413 Hi, Winnie. 311 00:20:07,497 --> 00:20:11,167 I just love your yummy strawberry locks! Zing, zing! 312 00:20:13,670 --> 00:20:17,757 Winnie. Give him his space, hon. I'm sorry, Mavis. 313 00:20:17,841 --> 00:20:20,343 It's okay, Aunt Wanda. They're just playing. 314 00:20:20,427 --> 00:20:24,388 Holy rabies! Limbo? I used to love that game! 315 00:20:24,473 --> 00:20:27,934 - Get in there, Mavey. - Really? But I'm a parent now. 316 00:20:28,018 --> 00:20:30,978 - Show 'em how it's done. - Okay. Okay, okay. 317 00:20:34,107 --> 00:20:35,107 (ALL CHEERING) 318 00:20:37,027 --> 00:20:38,027 (GASPS) 319 00:20:39,655 --> 00:20:41,489 No way! A piñata? 320 00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:46,869 Oh, Mavis, honey. That's for later. 321 00:20:46,954 --> 00:20:48,621 MAVIS: Whoo! (CHUCKLES) 322 00:20:48,705 --> 00:20:50,164 We don't want the pups to have too much... 323 00:20:50,874 --> 00:20:52,708 - (ALL CHEERING) - PUP: Candy! 324 00:20:56,171 --> 00:20:57,213 Sugar. 325 00:21:04,763 --> 00:21:06,555 I'm sorry. Did I start all that? 326 00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:08,891 Don't worry. There's a reason they call it a litter. 327 00:21:18,860 --> 00:21:19,819 Whoa! 328 00:21:19,903 --> 00:21:20,903 (GROANS) 329 00:21:20,988 --> 00:21:23,114 MAVIS: Dennis! Are you okay? 330 00:21:23,198 --> 00:21:26,742 - I got a candy. - Look! Your tooth came out. 331 00:21:26,827 --> 00:21:29,328 Are you kidding me? He got his tooth knocked out? 332 00:21:29,413 --> 00:21:32,164 Oh, yes, indeed. Here comes the fang. 333 00:21:32,249 --> 00:21:35,668 Dad. His baby tooth wasn't a fang. Why would this one be? 334 00:21:35,752 --> 00:21:37,586 He's not a monster. 335 00:21:38,463 --> 00:21:39,463 (SNIFFING) 336 00:21:39,673 --> 00:21:40,673 Ooh! 337 00:21:40,966 --> 00:21:41,966 (SIGHS) 338 00:21:42,050 --> 00:21:44,927 The sun's gonna come out soon, and we gotta get to his classes. 339 00:21:45,012 --> 00:21:49,015 What's wrong with the classes we have here? Like the kids' yoga? 340 00:21:49,349 --> 00:21:53,269 Yoga! 341 00:21:53,353 --> 00:21:55,479 This is Denisovich's home. 342 00:21:55,564 --> 00:21:58,274 - I don't know, Dad. - What don't you know? 343 00:21:58,358 --> 00:22:01,861 Well, we've been talking about moving. 344 00:22:01,945 --> 00:22:04,280 Somewhere safer for Dennis. 345 00:22:04,364 --> 00:22:07,158 Maybe where Johnny grew up in California. 346 00:22:07,242 --> 00:22:11,579 I'm sorry, but you can't just make somebody something they're not. 347 00:22:13,540 --> 00:22:16,417 - Come on, honey. We have to go. - Zing, zing? 348 00:22:17,252 --> 00:22:20,338 Mavey, wait. You can't mean that. 349 00:22:23,633 --> 00:22:25,426 You're in on this? The leaving? 350 00:22:25,510 --> 00:22:27,970 Uh... It's not definite at all. 351 00:22:28,055 --> 00:22:29,472 It's just something she's definitely talking about, 352 00:22:29,556 --> 00:22:32,266 but until we do it, it's not definitized. 353 00:22:35,312 --> 00:22:37,521 Did he just cover me with birdseed? 354 00:22:38,231 --> 00:22:39,607 Yeah, he covered me. 355 00:22:39,775 --> 00:22:40,775 (CAWING) 356 00:22:49,910 --> 00:22:52,328 Dad, it's not a fang. 357 00:22:52,412 --> 00:22:55,873 Dad, I don't know if it's the right place for Dennis. 358 00:22:55,957 --> 00:22:57,249 Right, Johnny? 359 00:22:57,334 --> 00:23:00,878 Oh, hey, dudeman. It's not me. It's Mavey. 360 00:23:00,962 --> 00:23:04,131 Hey, dudeman. I'm afraid to say anything. 361 00:23:04,299 --> 00:23:06,675 Hey, dudeman. I'm a dudeman! 362 00:23:06,760 --> 00:23:09,011 Uh, Drac? Who you talkin' to? 363 00:23:09,096 --> 00:23:11,639 Do not disturb. The count's wiggin' out in here. 364 00:23:12,641 --> 00:23:14,433 What are you wiggin' out about, Drac? 365 00:23:14,518 --> 00:23:17,603 The kids. Mavey Wavey's saying she wants to leave. 366 00:23:17,687 --> 00:23:20,606 She wants to leave? What about Johnny? He doesn't wanna go. 367 00:23:20,690 --> 00:23:23,067 He's making the hotel more human-y for Dennis. 368 00:23:23,151 --> 00:23:24,985 You know, seeing that he isn't a monster. 369 00:23:25,195 --> 00:23:26,570 He is a monster! 370 00:23:26,655 --> 00:23:28,739 - He's just a late fanger. - Mmm-hmm. 371 00:23:28,824 --> 00:23:30,157 And I could be a hand model. 372 00:23:30,242 --> 00:23:34,995 Shut up! It's all that human-y stuff that's confusing poor Denisovich. 373 00:23:35,997 --> 00:23:39,458 So maybe you gotta get the kid around more monster-y things. Ooh! 374 00:23:39,668 --> 00:23:41,168 Oh, I need a cape. 375 00:23:41,336 --> 00:23:44,588 DRACULA: I can't. She's always around, checking up on me. 376 00:23:44,673 --> 00:23:47,967 Man, if you could just get some alone time. 377 00:23:48,051 --> 00:23:50,803 DRACULA: Wait a minute. That's what Johnny wants, too. 378 00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:54,014 Alone time with Mavis. 379 00:23:56,226 --> 00:23:59,353 (STRAINING) Have they even had a vacation since before they were married? 380 00:23:59,438 --> 00:24:00,438 (TOILET FLUSHING) 381 00:24:02,983 --> 00:24:06,735 They're going to now. And so are we. Frank, you're a genius. 382 00:24:18,415 --> 00:24:19,415 Mmm-hmm. 383 00:24:20,375 --> 00:24:21,375 (CLEARS THROAT) 384 00:24:23,211 --> 00:24:25,963 We'll take Denisovich to all our old haunts. 385 00:24:26,047 --> 00:24:29,133 - (RAT SQUEAKING) - Each of us will show him our skills. 386 00:24:31,386 --> 00:24:33,721 Teach him how to be a monster. 387 00:24:35,932 --> 00:24:38,476 And he'll be fanging it up in no time. 388 00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:40,311 Boy turns five next week. 389 00:24:40,395 --> 00:24:43,063 If he's not a vampire by his birthday, it ain't happenin'. 390 00:24:43,231 --> 00:24:45,483 Oh, it ain't ain't happening, baby. 391 00:24:45,567 --> 00:24:48,152 All he needs is time with his vampa. 392 00:24:48,236 --> 00:24:50,821 - "Vampa"? - Vampire grandpa. 393 00:24:50,906 --> 00:24:53,115 Come on, man. That's obvious. 394 00:24:55,243 --> 00:24:59,663 - Johnny. Come outside. - What? Who is it? 395 00:24:59,748 --> 00:25:02,583 It's your father-in-law. I need to talk to you. 396 00:25:04,085 --> 00:25:05,419 What's up? 397 00:25:05,837 --> 00:25:06,837 Oh. 398 00:25:06,963 --> 00:25:09,006 Let me get rid of them. Sorry. 399 00:25:09,090 --> 00:25:12,343 No problem-o. I was kinda diggin' the attention. 400 00:25:12,552 --> 00:25:13,552 (CHIRPING) 401 00:25:14,429 --> 00:25:17,389 Can they stay? I don't think they're ready to leave yet. 402 00:25:17,474 --> 00:25:19,475 Come on. Go to your mother. 403 00:25:19,559 --> 00:25:22,353 - Look, you want to stay here, right? - Of course. 404 00:25:22,437 --> 00:25:25,022 This is the first place where I can really be myself. 405 00:25:25,106 --> 00:25:28,526 I haven't felt this alive since they invented stuffed-crust pizza. 406 00:25:28,610 --> 00:25:32,446 Well, then, we've got some work to do. Okay, so here's the plan. 407 00:25:33,073 --> 00:25:35,699 (WHISPERING) Maybe it's a good idea to take her to your hometown. 408 00:25:35,784 --> 00:25:37,284 But remember... (INAUDIBLE) 409 00:25:37,953 --> 00:25:40,746 So, it's sliced avocado, rolled oats with apricot, 410 00:25:40,830 --> 00:25:43,123 the Aveeno moisturizer after every bath. 411 00:25:43,208 --> 00:25:46,544 And then the shea butter on his tush before his PJs 412 00:25:46,628 --> 00:25:48,921 and then 20 minutes with the nebulizer 413 00:25:49,005 --> 00:25:52,341 while I read his Learning Factory Phonics book to him. 414 00:25:52,425 --> 00:25:55,719 It's asking a lot, Dad. We could just take Dennis with us. 415 00:25:55,804 --> 00:25:59,098 What? Are you kidding me? And get him off his routine? 416 00:25:59,182 --> 00:26:00,391 No, no, no. 417 00:26:00,475 --> 00:26:02,059 You kids go to California, 418 00:26:02,143 --> 00:26:04,895 and see if it's the right place to raise Denisovich. 419 00:26:04,980 --> 00:26:06,480 And you remember how to video chat? 420 00:26:06,565 --> 00:26:09,692 Yes, yes. With the phone and the buttons and the agony. 421 00:26:09,776 --> 00:26:13,696 Thanks for being so understanding, Dad. I know you'll keep him safe. 422 00:26:13,780 --> 00:26:17,408 Of course, Mavey. Stake my heart and hope to die. 423 00:26:17,492 --> 00:26:19,868 I'm just gonna miss him so much. 424 00:26:20,829 --> 00:26:23,998 - I love you, Dennis. - I love you, Mommy. 425 00:26:24,207 --> 00:26:27,710 I'll tell him Mavey Wavey stories every night before bed. 426 00:26:27,794 --> 00:26:30,129 You're the best. I love you, Dad. 427 00:26:33,049 --> 00:26:36,010 Gonna miss all you guys. You're all my family. 428 00:26:36,511 --> 00:26:40,639 - Love you, Drac. - Yes. I love you, too. 429 00:26:40,724 --> 00:26:44,393 Now, remember the plan. Just keep her distracted and happy. 430 00:26:44,477 --> 00:26:47,021 - But not too happy, capisce? - Got it. 431 00:26:47,105 --> 00:26:49,565 Operation "Just Keep Her Distracted and Happy, 432 00:26:49,649 --> 00:26:53,152 "But Not Too Happy, Capisce, " starts now. Cool? 433 00:26:53,236 --> 00:26:54,778 Smiling on the outside. 434 00:26:54,863 --> 00:26:57,031 - Will you hug my backpack? - No. 435 00:27:02,495 --> 00:27:03,495 (MOANS) 436 00:27:03,580 --> 00:27:05,247 Back to bed. 437 00:27:05,332 --> 00:27:08,334 Ah, yes, we'll get to the bed. We all love the bed. 438 00:27:08,418 --> 00:27:11,170 But we're just gonna do one thing first. 439 00:27:14,674 --> 00:27:16,300 Is it shorts weather where we're going? 440 00:27:16,384 --> 00:27:19,303 Jeez. I hope not. My body isn't swimsuit-ready yet. 441 00:27:19,387 --> 00:27:21,430 Whatever. Where's Griffin? 442 00:27:21,514 --> 00:27:23,932 Hey, can I have a second? I'm just saying goodbye to Emily. 443 00:27:24,017 --> 00:27:25,267 Oh, brother. 444 00:27:25,477 --> 00:27:27,978 GRIFFIN: (IN GIRLY VOICE) I'm gonna miss you so much. 445 00:27:28,063 --> 00:27:30,147 GRIFFIN: (IN NORMAL VOICE) You know, you have to be strong, honey. 446 00:27:30,231 --> 00:27:32,566 - Because what we have is unbreakable. - (BOTH KISSING) 447 00:27:32,651 --> 00:27:33,651 (SOBBING) 448 00:27:33,777 --> 00:27:36,654 GRIFFIN: Babe, don't cry. Everyone's looking. 449 00:27:36,738 --> 00:27:38,280 Okay, I gotta call him on this. 450 00:27:38,365 --> 00:27:40,866 Just let him play it out, get it over with. 451 00:27:40,950 --> 00:27:45,579 Okay, you two lovebirds. Drink your champagne and let's get going. 452 00:27:46,039 --> 00:27:48,332 GRIFFIN: Oh, yeah. No, sure. Okay. 453 00:27:48,416 --> 00:27:49,625 Cheers, babe. 454 00:27:51,461 --> 00:27:53,295 Oh. You klutz. 455 00:27:53,797 --> 00:27:57,591 - We can't say nothin' about this? - No. We don't have time for zingers. 456 00:28:05,600 --> 00:28:09,061 How do you click in the stupid car seat? 457 00:28:09,145 --> 00:28:10,688 You gotta cut those nails, man. 458 00:28:10,772 --> 00:28:12,940 We just strap our kids down with duct tape. 459 00:28:17,654 --> 00:28:18,654 What's he doing here? 460 00:28:18,738 --> 00:28:22,074 I told him he could come. He's never been outside the hotel. 461 00:28:22,158 --> 00:28:24,868 Blobby, there's no room. Sorry, man. 462 00:28:24,953 --> 00:28:25,953 (MAKING NONSENSICAL SOUNDS) 463 00:28:27,497 --> 00:28:29,039 Yeah, that ain't happenin'. 464 00:28:29,124 --> 00:28:32,167 Fine, put him on the Rascal. Let's just get going. 465 00:28:37,674 --> 00:28:38,716 Oh. 466 00:28:46,683 --> 00:28:49,059 Where are we going, Papa Drac? 467 00:28:49,144 --> 00:28:51,770 Oh, Denisovich, we're going to have an adventure. 468 00:28:51,855 --> 00:28:53,814 A monster-y adventure. 469 00:28:53,898 --> 00:28:56,942 Yay! Monsters! We're gonna eat cake. 470 00:28:57,026 --> 00:29:00,863 - What did he say? - No. No cake on this monster trip. 471 00:29:00,947 --> 00:29:05,325 No cake, cebause Kakie says, "Too much cake makes tummy ache. " 472 00:29:05,577 --> 00:29:06,577 Yay! 473 00:29:06,786 --> 00:29:08,495 "A monster always shares. " 474 00:29:09,998 --> 00:29:10,998 GRIFFIN: Wow! 475 00:29:11,291 --> 00:29:13,459 We may need more than a week. 476 00:29:13,543 --> 00:29:16,587 Hey, you know who could fix the kid in a snap? Vlad. 477 00:29:16,671 --> 00:29:19,673 What? We don't need to call Vlad. We got this. 478 00:29:20,133 --> 00:29:24,636 You see, Denisovich, monsters are nice, just like you. 479 00:29:24,721 --> 00:29:29,266 But when the moon comes out, the real monster fun begins. 480 00:29:29,350 --> 00:29:32,853 - (MUSIC PLAYS ON RADIO) - Being scary. Right, guys? 481 00:29:36,399 --> 00:29:39,568 - Guys? Guys! What is wrong with you? - (RADIO SWITCHES OFF) 482 00:29:39,652 --> 00:29:41,695 Come on. Everybody likes that song. 483 00:29:41,780 --> 00:29:45,407 We're not everybody. We're scary monsters. Remember? 484 00:29:45,742 --> 00:29:48,494 - GRIFFIN: Hey, what are you putting in? - It's an audio book. 485 00:29:48,578 --> 00:29:51,997 Bigfoot's life story. He reads it himself. 486 00:29:52,081 --> 00:29:53,499 WOMAN: Chapter One. 487 00:29:53,708 --> 00:29:54,708 (MR. BIGFOOT GROWLING) 488 00:30:00,882 --> 00:30:01,882 (MUSIC PLAYING ON HEADPHONES) 489 00:30:02,467 --> 00:30:03,467 (SIGHS) 490 00:30:26,074 --> 00:30:27,074 Wow! 491 00:30:27,158 --> 00:30:28,826 This is gonna be so amazing. 492 00:30:28,910 --> 00:30:32,371 Oh, yeah. You're gonna be so happy, but not too happy. 493 00:30:32,455 --> 00:30:33,580 - Huh? - What? 494 00:30:33,665 --> 00:30:35,916 I wanna see everything you did growing up. 495 00:30:36,084 --> 00:30:38,752 As long as you're distracted, capisce? 496 00:30:40,088 --> 00:30:41,922 We can hit a few spots on the way to my parents. 497 00:30:42,006 --> 00:30:44,967 - Lemme just quickly call home. - Ah! Don't do that. 498 00:30:45,051 --> 00:30:47,845 It's only 1:00 a. m. there. Dennis isn't even up yet. 499 00:30:47,929 --> 00:30:51,014 Right. I'm just not used to being away from him. 500 00:30:51,099 --> 00:30:54,017 Everything's gonna be cool. Your dad was so all over it. 501 00:30:54,102 --> 00:30:56,270 I know. He's the best. 502 00:31:16,624 --> 00:31:18,250 DRACULA: Right turn, here. 503 00:31:19,043 --> 00:31:21,962 - Denisovich, rise and shine. - (SNORING) 504 00:31:22,380 --> 00:31:24,798 Boys, this bringing back any memories? 505 00:31:24,883 --> 00:31:28,302 We used to prowl around here when we were in our 100s. 506 00:31:28,386 --> 00:31:31,972 The Dark Forest of Slobozia. 507 00:31:41,316 --> 00:31:44,568 - Nice how they built it up. - Okay, out of the car. 508 00:31:44,986 --> 00:31:49,990 Denisovich, you're going to see every monster do his specialty. 509 00:31:50,116 --> 00:31:53,994 First, Frank's gonna show us how he scares people. 510 00:31:54,078 --> 00:31:59,082 - Yay! He's gonna say, "Boo. " - Yeah, I don't think "boos" ever work. 511 00:31:59,167 --> 00:32:02,753 But that's why we're here. To learn from the master. 512 00:32:03,588 --> 00:32:05,589 Okay, I'll give it a shot. 513 00:32:15,683 --> 00:32:16,683 (INDISTINCT CHATTERING) 514 00:32:16,768 --> 00:32:17,768 (GROWLS) 515 00:32:21,105 --> 00:32:23,649 Yeah, guess it just depends on work. (GASPS) 516 00:32:23,733 --> 00:32:24,733 (GROWLS) 517 00:32:25,151 --> 00:32:26,693 Frankenstein! (CHUCKLES) 518 00:32:26,819 --> 00:32:28,278 Hey, how ya doin'? 519 00:32:28,696 --> 00:32:31,657 You're awesome! Can we take a picture? Is that okay? 520 00:32:31,741 --> 00:32:34,117 Sure, okay. Little selfie action. (CHUCKLES) 521 00:32:34,202 --> 00:32:35,243 (CAMERA CLICKING) 522 00:32:35,328 --> 00:32:36,370 For real? 523 00:32:36,996 --> 00:32:40,040 - Awesome! Thank you so much. - Hey, have a great day. 524 00:32:40,625 --> 00:32:41,708 Boo! 525 00:32:41,793 --> 00:32:44,211 - Oh. He's adorable. - He's adorable. (CHUCKLES) 526 00:32:44,379 --> 00:32:46,129 Adorable, yes. 527 00:32:46,214 --> 00:32:49,466 Not scary, but "boo" is a start. 528 00:32:49,926 --> 00:32:50,926 (SCREAMS) 529 00:32:51,552 --> 00:32:52,552 (NERVOUS CHUCKLE) 530 00:32:59,894 --> 00:33:02,938 My birthday cake's gonna have the coolest guy on it. 531 00:33:03,022 --> 00:33:05,065 Let me guess. Kakie. 532 00:33:05,149 --> 00:33:08,986 No. He's so cool. He climbs walls and wears a cape. 533 00:33:09,070 --> 00:33:12,239 Oh, really. And who is this very cool guy? 534 00:33:12,323 --> 00:33:15,617 - Batman! - Batman. Great. 535 00:33:15,702 --> 00:33:19,037 You don't know anyone else with a cape that's cool? 536 00:33:19,122 --> 00:33:20,414 This is good. Stop here. 537 00:33:26,087 --> 00:33:29,506 Okay, Wayne. It's your turn. Go kill something. 538 00:33:29,590 --> 00:33:30,966 Denisovich, watch this. 539 00:33:31,050 --> 00:33:33,301 - What? - I told you, come on. 540 00:33:33,386 --> 00:33:37,431 If we don't inspire Denisovich, how's he going to find his inner monster? 541 00:33:37,515 --> 00:33:40,350 - Who's in a monster? - Nobody, just... 542 00:33:40,435 --> 00:33:42,561 - Here, have an avocado. - Yay! 543 00:33:42,645 --> 00:33:46,690 Your mommy says it's a good fat. Whatever the heaven that means. 544 00:33:46,774 --> 00:33:48,775 Listen, I'm not gonna set monsters back again 545 00:33:48,860 --> 00:33:51,278 just to make your grandkid like vampires. 546 00:33:51,362 --> 00:33:53,196 Anyway, there's nothing to kill here. It's all been... 547 00:33:53,281 --> 00:33:54,281 (TWIGS SNAPPING) 548 00:33:57,285 --> 00:33:58,326 Aw... 549 00:33:58,411 --> 00:33:59,953 What a cutie. 550 00:34:00,413 --> 00:34:01,621 But kill him. 551 00:34:01,789 --> 00:34:05,292 Oh, great. You know I haven't done this in years. 552 00:34:05,376 --> 00:34:08,211 We don't need to kill anymore. We have Pop-Tarts. 553 00:34:08,296 --> 00:34:10,380 Denisovich, you're going to love this. 554 00:34:10,465 --> 00:34:14,051 Wayne's going to eat that whole deer, and the next one's yours. 555 00:34:14,135 --> 00:34:15,260 Wayne, go. 556 00:34:19,640 --> 00:34:22,017 Oh, man. I'm too old for this. 557 00:34:22,101 --> 00:34:24,144 Okay, how's it go again? 558 00:34:24,437 --> 00:34:25,437 (HOWLS) 559 00:34:25,646 --> 00:34:27,314 No, no, wait. That's for the moon. 560 00:34:27,398 --> 00:34:29,816 Oh, I growl. Right, here goes. 561 00:34:31,819 --> 00:34:34,154 - Growl! - MAN: Get it, boy. 562 00:34:34,655 --> 00:34:35,655 (BARKING) 563 00:34:37,158 --> 00:34:38,158 (BOTH GROWLING) 564 00:34:39,660 --> 00:34:41,411 Get it, Uncle Wayne. 565 00:34:43,331 --> 00:34:47,459 Some werewolf. Did you actually say the word "growl?" 566 00:34:47,543 --> 00:34:50,670 - You're a werewussy. - I said I was rusty. 567 00:34:52,173 --> 00:34:55,092 - Gimme me that Frisbee. - No! It's my Frisbee! I fetched it! 568 00:34:55,176 --> 00:34:56,384 DRACULA: Give it to me! Give it back! 569 00:34:56,761 --> 00:34:59,721 Give it over here! Give me that! Give it back! 570 00:35:05,103 --> 00:35:07,062 He's fine. He's Blobby. 571 00:35:09,315 --> 00:35:12,234 This place is so amazing and scenic. 572 00:35:12,318 --> 00:35:14,861 - What do you wanna show me first? - Mmm. I don't know. 573 00:35:14,946 --> 00:35:17,948 It's pretty, but there's really nothing to do once it gets dark. 574 00:35:18,032 --> 00:35:19,699 Wait. What's that place? 575 00:35:23,788 --> 00:35:27,999 So, you're telling me that I can pick between all these different kinds of chips? 576 00:35:28,751 --> 00:35:29,751 Yes. 577 00:35:29,836 --> 00:35:31,920 How do people decide? 578 00:35:32,380 --> 00:35:33,380 Whoa! 579 00:35:33,506 --> 00:35:36,716 Now what's that beautiful fountain of rubies? 580 00:35:37,593 --> 00:35:41,513 - Johnny, have you tried this Slurpée? - Not that quickly, hon. 581 00:35:41,597 --> 00:35:45,267 It comes in 48 flavors. We have to try them all. 582 00:35:48,104 --> 00:35:49,813 Uh, I don't know if we have time. 583 00:35:49,897 --> 00:35:52,941 Why? This place is open all night. Right, sir? 584 00:35:53,067 --> 00:35:54,109 Yes. 585 00:35:55,403 --> 00:35:56,403 (CHUCKLES) 586 00:35:58,573 --> 00:35:59,573 Johnny, look. 587 00:35:59,657 --> 00:36:03,118 They're making a TV show about this place and we're the stars. 588 00:36:03,202 --> 00:36:05,787 - Hello, world. - Awesome. 589 00:36:05,872 --> 00:36:09,875 It's totally awesome. You're so lucky, Kal. 590 00:36:10,585 --> 00:36:12,377 Hello, world. 591 00:36:15,673 --> 00:36:17,883 Okay, Murray. Your turn. 592 00:36:18,801 --> 00:36:22,095 Excuse us. Do you know where someone can get a bite around here? 593 00:36:22,180 --> 00:36:25,223 Did you seriously just ask a vampire where to get a bite? 594 00:36:25,725 --> 00:36:28,101 Oh, gosh. I didn't mean... We're not from around here. 595 00:36:28,186 --> 00:36:30,687 This is so embarrassing. Just keep going. 596 00:36:30,771 --> 00:36:33,106 Sorry to bother you. Love your chocolate cereal. 597 00:36:36,194 --> 00:36:37,986 So, what do you want me to do now? 598 00:36:38,070 --> 00:36:39,863 Denisovich, you won't believe it. 599 00:36:39,947 --> 00:36:44,159 The mummy can crash through walls and turn into a swarm of beetles 600 00:36:44,452 --> 00:36:46,620 and put a curse on anyone. 601 00:36:46,704 --> 00:36:49,789 - That sounds mean. - It's fun mean. Okay. 602 00:36:49,874 --> 00:36:51,124 So, check it out. 603 00:36:51,209 --> 00:36:56,129 Murray's going to conjure up the biggest sandstorm you've ever seen. 604 00:36:56,214 --> 00:36:59,216 - Hit it! - Sandstorm? It's been awhile. 605 00:36:59,300 --> 00:37:03,678 - Not my problem. Do it. Say your little spell. - Okay. 606 00:37:04,096 --> 00:37:08,266 (SIGHS) I got this. Frank, Wayne, Griffin, just try not to faint. 607 00:37:13,564 --> 00:37:14,564 (CLEARS THROAT) 608 00:37:15,399 --> 00:37:18,026 (CHANTING IN FAUX EGYPTIAN LANGUAGE) 609 00:37:29,330 --> 00:37:30,330 Ow! 610 00:37:30,414 --> 00:37:31,665 My back. 611 00:37:32,333 --> 00:37:33,333 (GROANS) 612 00:37:36,337 --> 00:37:37,337 (LAUGHING) 613 00:37:40,591 --> 00:37:42,133 Oh. Wait. 614 00:37:45,721 --> 00:37:46,721 (BOTH LAUGHING) 615 00:37:47,265 --> 00:37:48,265 (GRIFFIN LAUGHING) 616 00:37:48,349 --> 00:37:49,683 How cute! 617 00:37:49,976 --> 00:37:50,934 (GROANING) 618 00:37:51,018 --> 00:37:52,811 Ow! Ow! 619 00:37:56,565 --> 00:38:00,318 Wait. Stop at that playground. Look at these cute kids. 620 00:38:02,863 --> 00:38:03,863 (GRUNTING) 621 00:38:06,659 --> 00:38:09,703 Holy rabies! This looks like a blast. 622 00:38:09,787 --> 00:38:10,870 I don't know, Mavey. 623 00:38:10,955 --> 00:38:14,040 This can be pretty dangerous if you don't know what you're doing. 624 00:38:14,125 --> 00:38:15,834 Of course, I rock these bikes. 625 00:38:15,918 --> 00:38:17,460 May I, little dude? 626 00:38:18,129 --> 00:38:20,505 Check it out. Oh, yeah. 627 00:38:20,589 --> 00:38:23,091 This is how I rolled every summer. 628 00:38:24,844 --> 00:38:26,636 Whoo-hoo! 629 00:38:26,887 --> 00:38:27,887 Whoa, whoa! 630 00:38:28,723 --> 00:38:29,723 (SCREAMING) 631 00:38:34,603 --> 00:38:35,603 (GROANS) 632 00:38:37,315 --> 00:38:38,648 I think I scratched it. 633 00:38:38,774 --> 00:38:39,774 Oh... 634 00:38:39,900 --> 00:38:40,900 My turn. 635 00:38:40,985 --> 00:38:44,446 (CHUCKLES) Mavey, I told you, it took me years to get this good. 636 00:38:44,530 --> 00:38:46,656 Well, I'll give it a try. 637 00:39:23,110 --> 00:39:24,069 (ALL CHEERING) 638 00:39:24,153 --> 00:39:25,153 (LAUGHING) 639 00:39:25,363 --> 00:39:28,281 You feel me now? That's my girlfriend, suckers. 640 00:39:28,366 --> 00:39:31,159 - Your wife, Johnny. - My wife. Even better. 641 00:39:31,285 --> 00:39:35,205 That was sick, lady. Where did you learn how to do that stuff? 642 00:39:35,289 --> 00:39:36,414 Transylvania. 643 00:39:36,499 --> 00:39:39,709 That's cool. I have a cousin from Pennsylvania. 644 00:39:39,794 --> 00:39:43,463 Oh. These little guys are so sweet. Dennis would love them. 645 00:39:43,589 --> 00:39:47,425 - What an awesome place to raise a kid. - Oh. To raise a kid? 646 00:39:47,510 --> 00:39:49,260 I don't know about awesome. 647 00:39:49,345 --> 00:39:52,305 Maybe tubular. Capisce? 648 00:39:52,390 --> 00:39:54,099 Anyways, we should hit my folks' place. 649 00:39:54,183 --> 00:39:56,351 - I said we'd be there by now. - Sure. 650 00:39:56,435 --> 00:40:00,980 Oh, hey, it's after 3:00 in Transylvania. I'm gonna check on Dennis, okay? 651 00:40:05,611 --> 00:40:08,196 Chocolate cereal. Are you kidding me? 652 00:40:08,322 --> 00:40:12,992 - It's okay, Drac. It's 'cause they love us. - Yeah. Monsters are what's goin' on. 653 00:40:13,119 --> 00:40:15,120 GRIFFIN: Oh, yeah. You should embrace it like I did. 654 00:40:15,204 --> 00:40:17,122 I've got a best-selling workout video. 655 00:40:17,206 --> 00:40:19,999 Follow me, ladies. Right. And left. 656 00:40:20,084 --> 00:40:22,752 No, girls. Watch me. You're not watching. 657 00:40:22,837 --> 00:40:25,797 Here we go. And eight and seven and six... 658 00:40:25,881 --> 00:40:27,257 That's not me, guys. 659 00:40:27,341 --> 00:40:30,677 Come on, even Bigfoot's tearin' it up in the German soccer league. 660 00:40:30,970 --> 00:40:32,846 - (COMMENTATOR SPEAKING GERMAN) - (AUDIENCE CHEERING) 661 00:40:38,936 --> 00:40:40,854 - (CELL PHONE RINGING) - Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no. 662 00:40:41,522 --> 00:40:44,357 - It's Mavis. - You gotta answer it. 663 00:40:44,817 --> 00:40:48,319 - You're pushin' too hard. Lighter. - All right! 664 00:40:48,404 --> 00:40:51,573 Denisovich, wake up. Oh, boy, he's out cold. 665 00:40:51,657 --> 00:40:53,032 GRIFFIN: I got this. 666 00:40:55,619 --> 00:40:57,954 - Dad, what took so long? - What? 667 00:40:58,038 --> 00:41:01,583 Nothing, Mavey. We're all great here at the hotel. 668 00:41:01,667 --> 00:41:03,501 Just doing hotel things. 669 00:41:03,586 --> 00:41:06,379 - Sorry, can't handle your breath. - I hear ya. 670 00:41:06,672 --> 00:41:09,299 - How are you? - We're having a blast. 671 00:41:09,383 --> 00:41:13,052 We just went biking and mini-marting. It's so fun here. 672 00:41:13,554 --> 00:41:16,264 - Is Dennis okay? - Oh. Of course. 673 00:41:16,348 --> 00:41:19,893 - You want to see him? - Yes. Yes, I do. 674 00:41:19,977 --> 00:41:22,854 - Hi, baby. How are you? - GRIFFIN: Mommy. 675 00:41:22,938 --> 00:41:24,022 I happy. (CHUCKLES) 676 00:41:24,690 --> 00:41:25,690 Aw. 677 00:41:25,774 --> 00:41:28,943 - Hey, little dude. - Why is he wearing sunglasses? 678 00:41:29,028 --> 00:41:31,070 Oh, we were playing. 679 00:41:31,238 --> 00:41:33,823 It's a superhero thing. 680 00:41:33,908 --> 00:41:37,202 GRIFFIN: Cebause, I'm Sunglasses Man, to the rescue! 681 00:41:37,286 --> 00:41:39,162 - Okay, take it down a notch. - I'm flying. 682 00:41:39,246 --> 00:41:44,000 - You sound funny. - Oh, no, no, that's his Sunglasses Man voice. 683 00:41:44,585 --> 00:41:47,962 (VOCALIZES) Static. The signal is bad. Mavis, are you there? 684 00:41:49,131 --> 00:41:50,465 MAVIS: Yeah, I'm still... 685 00:41:51,175 --> 00:41:56,137 - All right. I guess he's having fun. - Of course he is. (CHUCKLES) 686 00:41:57,556 --> 00:42:00,099 GRIFFIN: Wow, I nailed it with the Sunglasses Man. 687 00:42:00,184 --> 00:42:01,809 Right off the top of my head. 688 00:42:01,894 --> 00:42:03,728 I threw in a "cebause. " Did everyone see that? 689 00:42:03,812 --> 00:42:06,481 She said she was having fun. Johnny's blowing it. 690 00:42:06,565 --> 00:42:09,692 She's biking and mini-marting. She's gonna wanna move! 691 00:42:09,777 --> 00:42:12,904 I gotta fix this kid now. Are we almost there or what? 692 00:42:12,988 --> 00:42:16,616 GRIFFIN: (NERVOUS CHUCKLE) Okay, I may have taken a wrong turn a few miles back. 693 00:42:16,700 --> 00:42:18,660 - Don't get mad. - What? 694 00:42:20,329 --> 00:42:22,539 Someone turn on the navigator on this thing. 695 00:42:22,623 --> 00:42:24,624 - Look how light I touch it. - (CELL PHONE BEEPS) 696 00:42:24,708 --> 00:42:27,752 NAVIGATOR VOICE: Please enter your destination. 697 00:42:27,836 --> 00:42:31,673 Please. I am begging you. 698 00:42:34,093 --> 00:42:36,553 Yeah, this is gonna be good, Denisovich. 699 00:42:36,637 --> 00:42:39,347 Scary stuff, okay? It's in you. 700 00:42:39,431 --> 00:42:42,183 We just gotta concentrate on the scary. 701 00:42:42,268 --> 00:42:45,061 Papa Drac? Do you miss Grandma? 702 00:42:45,145 --> 00:42:48,022 Miss Grandma? Oh. Sure, I do. 703 00:42:48,107 --> 00:42:52,569 I miss her every day. She was my zing. 704 00:42:53,362 --> 00:42:56,281 - Why do you ask? - I don't know. 705 00:42:56,365 --> 00:43:00,285 - Do you miss anybody? - I miss Mommy and Daddy. 706 00:43:00,369 --> 00:43:02,996 And who else? You miss that Winnie? 707 00:43:03,080 --> 00:43:06,457 The pup who tackles you and tries to lick you all the time? 708 00:43:06,542 --> 00:43:08,710 Yeah, but we're just friends. 709 00:43:08,794 --> 00:43:11,379 Oh, no, no, no. You're a Dracula. 710 00:43:11,463 --> 00:43:15,174 You can't just be friends with a cute, hairy number like Winnie. 711 00:43:15,259 --> 00:43:21,055 NAVIGATOR VOICE: Right turn, now! Here. You imbecile! 712 00:43:21,140 --> 00:43:23,766 - Oh, right. Turn, Griffin! - Yes, Papa Drac. 713 00:43:28,355 --> 00:43:32,900 Wait and see, fellas. This kid'll be guzzling goat blood in no time. 714 00:43:32,985 --> 00:43:36,863 NAVIGATOR VOICE: You have arrived at your destination. Yes! 715 00:43:36,989 --> 00:43:38,406 - Yes! - Here we are. 716 00:43:38,490 --> 00:43:41,117 It's the vampire summer camp I went to as a kid. 717 00:43:41,201 --> 00:43:45,872 - What's it, Camp Vamp? - No. Who names their camp "Camp Vamp?" 718 00:43:45,998 --> 00:43:48,333 It's Camp Winnepacaca. 719 00:44:05,893 --> 00:44:06,893 (GIGGLING) 720 00:44:08,646 --> 00:44:10,146 You see, Denisovich? 721 00:44:10,230 --> 00:44:14,108 This is where I learned to catch mice and shapeshift. 722 00:44:14,193 --> 00:44:18,321 And use my incredible powers and strength. It's pretty cool. Huh? 723 00:44:18,405 --> 00:44:19,489 Badminton. 724 00:44:19,907 --> 00:44:20,907 (GRUNTING) 725 00:44:23,661 --> 00:44:26,913 Yes, I don't remember this badminting. 726 00:44:26,997 --> 00:44:30,041 Well, well, is this a night? How ya doin', folks? 727 00:44:30,125 --> 00:44:31,709 I'm Dana, the director. 728 00:44:31,794 --> 00:44:34,587 We're sure excited to have you legends visitin' us. 729 00:44:34,672 --> 00:44:36,089 What can I do you for? 730 00:44:36,173 --> 00:44:41,260 Well, I'm very interested in sending my grandboy, Denisovich, here. 731 00:44:41,345 --> 00:44:45,431 Oh. This little redheaded, non-fangy little guy? 732 00:44:45,516 --> 00:44:49,310 Oh, they're in there. He's a late fanger. That's why we came here. 733 00:44:49,395 --> 00:44:53,481 Can you show us some of the drills, like where they catch the mice? 734 00:44:53,565 --> 00:44:57,068 Can do. A- course now we call it Tee-Mousing. 735 00:44:59,738 --> 00:45:00,738 (SQUEAKING) 736 00:45:02,908 --> 00:45:03,908 (CHUCKLING) 737 00:45:07,746 --> 00:45:10,039 So they don't have to catch the mice? 738 00:45:10,124 --> 00:45:14,127 Nope. We find this is a good way to build their confidence. 739 00:45:15,879 --> 00:45:16,963 Come here. 740 00:45:17,965 --> 00:45:20,007 It's right there! What's the matter with you? 741 00:45:21,760 --> 00:45:23,094 Hokey-pokey. 742 00:45:24,722 --> 00:45:25,722 Ah! 743 00:45:25,889 --> 00:45:29,392 There it is, Denisovich. Where Papa learned to fly. 744 00:45:29,476 --> 00:45:31,769 Ooh! I wanna fly like Papa. 745 00:45:31,854 --> 00:45:32,854 (CREAKING) 746 00:45:37,025 --> 00:45:38,067 Uh... 747 00:45:38,152 --> 00:45:40,236 Yeah. We're over here, now. 748 00:45:41,196 --> 00:45:44,115 Had to scale it down. Insurance. 749 00:45:46,493 --> 00:45:47,535 (GROANS) 750 00:45:47,619 --> 00:45:49,287 Help me. Help me. Help me. 751 00:45:49,830 --> 00:45:53,124 Hokey-pokey. See ya at the campfire. 752 00:45:54,668 --> 00:45:55,668 (DOORBELL DINGS) 753 00:45:57,755 --> 00:46:01,507 - Well, gosh! Welcome, you two. - Hey, gang. 754 00:46:01,675 --> 00:46:04,343 Hi, guys. This is so exciting. 755 00:46:04,470 --> 00:46:08,598 Ah! Look at all of this. So cool. 756 00:46:08,682 --> 00:46:12,477 - Wow! I can't believe I'm actually here. - Well, you are. 757 00:46:12,561 --> 00:46:16,189 Now, how does it work? Are you up all night and sleep all day? 758 00:46:16,273 --> 00:46:17,315 Yeah. 759 00:46:17,399 --> 00:46:19,817 - Oh. I'll do whatever you guys want. - Good. 760 00:46:19,902 --> 00:46:22,487 - 'Cause I bought this pretty sunhat for you. - Linda. 761 00:46:22,571 --> 00:46:24,655 But otherwise this poncho, if you wanna be safe. 762 00:46:24,740 --> 00:46:27,784 - We can deal with it later, Linda. - Okay. 763 00:46:27,868 --> 00:46:29,702 Oh! Come see. 764 00:46:30,412 --> 00:46:32,038 I've set up your bedroom. 765 00:46:32,331 --> 00:46:33,331 (EVIL LAUGHTER) 766 00:46:36,210 --> 00:46:39,003 It's just like Transylvania. 767 00:46:39,296 --> 00:46:42,590 Oh, Transylvania. That was a fun experience. 768 00:46:42,674 --> 00:46:44,842 Mike was afraid he'd get disemboweled and eaten, 769 00:46:44,927 --> 00:46:46,803 but I told him he was just being silly. 770 00:46:46,887 --> 00:46:48,596 - That was you, Linda. - (DOORBELL DINGS) 771 00:46:49,139 --> 00:46:50,473 Oh. There they are. 772 00:46:50,557 --> 00:46:53,601 You know, we have a couple of mixed families in the neighborhood, 773 00:46:53,685 --> 00:46:55,645 so I thought I'd invite them over. 774 00:46:55,729 --> 00:46:59,857 They might be nice for you guys to talk to since you're thinkin' about moving here. 775 00:47:01,360 --> 00:47:03,402 Hi, Caren. Hi, Pandragora. 776 00:47:03,487 --> 00:47:05,404 - Welcome, Mavis. - Hey, guys. 777 00:47:06,532 --> 00:47:09,659 Yeah, you're gonna dig it here. Don't even worry. 778 00:47:09,743 --> 00:47:12,954 People are totally cool with our lifestyle choice. 779 00:47:13,038 --> 00:47:14,747 - (DOORBELL DINGS) - I mean, the kids get picked on a little, 780 00:47:14,832 --> 00:47:16,249 but it toughens them up. 781 00:47:16,750 --> 00:47:18,584 LINDA: Oh, hey, you guys. And this is Loretta. 782 00:47:18,669 --> 00:47:22,004 - She's married to Paul, who's a werewolf. - Excuse me? 783 00:47:22,089 --> 00:47:25,800 Yes, I was telling Mavis about the other monster-human couples in town. 784 00:47:26,134 --> 00:47:30,054 - I am not a werewolf. - Oh. I thought... 785 00:47:30,222 --> 00:47:33,558 Well, you're welcome to stay and have some cupcakes. (CHUCKLES) 786 00:47:34,768 --> 00:47:35,768 (DOOR CLOSES) 787 00:47:36,603 --> 00:47:40,815 ALL: (SINGING) Vampires will be friends forever 788 00:47:40,899 --> 00:47:44,944 Through the centuries together 789 00:47:45,028 --> 00:47:49,240 Even in the brightest sunny weather 790 00:47:49,324 --> 00:47:53,703 Vampires will be friends forever 791 00:47:53,787 --> 00:47:57,164 Literally 792 00:47:57,249 --> 00:48:00,710 Forever 793 00:48:00,794 --> 00:48:01,794 (ALL CHEERING) 794 00:48:04,214 --> 00:48:08,050 - Great job, vampires. Give yourselves a hug. - ALL: Mmm... 795 00:48:13,307 --> 00:48:15,349 - We're going. - What? Where? 796 00:48:21,773 --> 00:48:22,982 MURRAY: Why are we doing this? 797 00:48:23,066 --> 00:48:25,735 You'd rather be listening to those putrid new songs? 798 00:48:25,819 --> 00:48:28,237 What happened to Michael Row Your Corpse Ashore? 799 00:48:28,322 --> 00:48:31,032 Or Old McWerewolf Had An Axe? 800 00:48:36,330 --> 00:48:38,122 We shouldn't be up here, Drac. 801 00:48:38,206 --> 00:48:42,376 - Who's ready to fly? - Me! Me! Like a superhero. 802 00:48:42,461 --> 00:48:44,587 Better! Like a vampire! 803 00:48:45,339 --> 00:48:46,797 This thing is rickety. 804 00:48:46,882 --> 00:48:49,050 You know what? Maybe the kid isn't supposed to fly. 805 00:48:49,134 --> 00:48:53,012 Quiet. This is how they learn. You throw them and they figure it out. 806 00:48:53,847 --> 00:48:56,641 - It's how I was taught. - I wanna fly now! 807 00:48:56,725 --> 00:49:00,186 Attabat. You know Papa's right here if you need him. 808 00:49:00,354 --> 00:49:03,230 - Uh. I can't watch this. - Please don't. 809 00:49:03,315 --> 00:49:05,900 Here we go! 810 00:49:05,984 --> 00:49:06,984 DENNIS: Wee! 811 00:49:12,199 --> 00:49:14,825 - He's still not flying. - He will. 812 00:49:16,036 --> 00:49:18,537 - Still not. - It'll happen. 813 00:49:19,539 --> 00:49:22,416 - This is a tall tower. - That's why it's good. 814 00:49:22,501 --> 00:49:24,961 - You should get him. - He's gonna fall to his death. 815 00:49:25,045 --> 00:49:26,963 He's taking his time. 816 00:49:27,047 --> 00:49:28,255 (DENNIS YELLING) 817 00:49:28,382 --> 00:49:31,217 - Drac! - I did that my first time. 818 00:49:31,718 --> 00:49:33,761 He's getting too close to the ground! 819 00:49:34,680 --> 00:49:36,514 You know what? He's not gonna fly. 820 00:49:37,474 --> 00:49:38,474 (ALL GASPING) 821 00:49:39,059 --> 00:49:40,101 (CHEERING) 822 00:49:40,811 --> 00:49:41,811 (GASPS) 823 00:49:43,981 --> 00:49:44,981 Ah. 824 00:49:46,733 --> 00:49:50,027 I told you. Papa's always here for you. 825 00:49:50,112 --> 00:49:51,654 Again! Again! 826 00:49:51,905 --> 00:49:55,032 Oh, dear. Oh, my devil. We're gonna have to report this. 827 00:49:55,117 --> 00:49:56,367 You mean to the papers? 828 00:49:56,451 --> 00:49:59,996 I guess it was pretty cool, but I'm not about getting press. 829 00:50:00,080 --> 00:50:05,042 No, sir. I mean the authorities. I can't not report child endangerment. 830 00:50:05,127 --> 00:50:07,795 Whoa! Listen to me. That was fun. 831 00:50:07,879 --> 00:50:10,339 Your singing is child endangerment. 832 00:50:10,424 --> 00:50:12,133 Should we go down and help him? 833 00:50:12,217 --> 00:50:15,094 Nope. I told him this was nuts. He's on his own. 834 00:50:15,178 --> 00:50:18,472 - We have to call the boy's mother. - No, that ain't happening. 835 00:50:18,557 --> 00:50:21,183 His mother's already nutsy koo koo! 836 00:50:21,268 --> 00:50:23,436 I have to follow protocol. 837 00:50:23,770 --> 00:50:27,189 You will not follow protocol. 838 00:50:27,274 --> 00:50:29,734 I'm a vampire. I can't be hypnotized. 839 00:50:30,402 --> 00:50:33,946 - Right. - Now, please. Don't make me call the police. 840 00:50:34,031 --> 00:50:36,032 No one's calling nobody! 841 00:50:36,742 --> 00:50:37,700 (EXPLOSION) 842 00:50:37,784 --> 00:50:38,868 FRANKENSTEIN: Aah! 843 00:50:38,952 --> 00:50:40,036 Fire! 844 00:50:40,120 --> 00:50:43,205 MURRAY: Stop, drop and roll. Stop, drop and roll. 845 00:50:43,290 --> 00:50:44,665 GRIFFIN: Screaming's not helping! 846 00:50:44,791 --> 00:50:45,791 ALL: Yay! 847 00:50:53,425 --> 00:50:55,384 Are we bad guys, Papa Drac? 848 00:50:55,927 --> 00:50:56,969 Bad? 849 00:50:58,472 --> 00:51:01,098 No. You're the best kid in the world. 850 00:51:01,183 --> 00:51:04,435 We didn't start the fire. It was the tower. 851 00:51:04,519 --> 00:51:09,398 That's a very unsafe tower. You're lucky we don't call the authorities. 852 00:51:09,483 --> 00:51:10,941 Let's go, my hero. 853 00:51:11,026 --> 00:51:13,944 Cebause I'm Batman! To the Batmobile! 854 00:51:14,029 --> 00:51:15,863 (CHUCKLES) Yes. To the... 855 00:51:18,408 --> 00:51:19,408 (CLATTERING) 856 00:51:20,410 --> 00:51:21,410 (WAYNE BARKING) 857 00:51:22,412 --> 00:51:23,662 (MUSIC PLAYING) 858 00:51:26,500 --> 00:51:29,543 Sorry about all that stuff. I guess they thought you'd like it. 859 00:51:29,628 --> 00:51:33,798 - Why do I feel so weird here? - No, hon. They're being weird. 860 00:51:33,882 --> 00:51:36,092 I think they're just trying to help me. 861 00:51:36,176 --> 00:51:39,804 I mean, I grew up knowing nothing living inside that hotel. 862 00:51:39,888 --> 00:51:43,099 And you learned about everything growing up in Santa Claus. 863 00:51:43,183 --> 00:51:44,934 Santa Cruz. But, uh... 864 00:51:45,393 --> 00:51:48,229 Maybe if Dennis grows up away from Transylvania, 865 00:51:48,313 --> 00:51:52,441 he won't be so freaky. Like me. 866 00:51:52,526 --> 00:51:55,778 Are you nuts? Mavis, you're a blast. 867 00:51:55,862 --> 00:51:58,739 You're so full of life and curious about everything. 868 00:51:58,824 --> 00:52:03,285 If Dennis grows up to be just like you, I'll be the luckiest dad in the world. 869 00:52:03,370 --> 00:52:06,497 (CHUCKLES) I love you, Johnnystein. 870 00:52:06,581 --> 00:52:07,748 You know what? 871 00:52:07,833 --> 00:52:10,918 As long as we're all together, we'll be happy anywhere. 872 00:52:11,002 --> 00:52:12,670 Even at the hotel. 873 00:52:13,588 --> 00:52:15,214 Yes! 874 00:52:15,298 --> 00:52:16,298 (CELL PHONE RINGING) 875 00:52:17,592 --> 00:52:18,843 - What are you doing? - (DENNIS YELLING) 876 00:52:18,927 --> 00:52:23,889 Check out this video my friend sent me. This kid is an awesome daredevil. 877 00:52:24,766 --> 00:52:25,808 Ah. 878 00:52:25,892 --> 00:52:26,851 Oh, dude! 879 00:52:26,935 --> 00:52:28,978 - Did you get it? - Wait! Is that Dennis? 880 00:52:29,062 --> 00:52:33,732 No! Is it? No. It's just hard to see. But... (NERVOUS CHUCKLE) 881 00:52:33,859 --> 00:52:36,652 Oops. Just deleted it. So, it's gone. 882 00:52:36,736 --> 00:52:37,736 (GROANS) 883 00:52:42,367 --> 00:52:43,367 (CELL PHONE VIBRATING) 884 00:52:46,913 --> 00:52:49,415 What? It's Mavis. I'm not answering it. 885 00:52:51,293 --> 00:52:53,419 Come on, Drac. You have to. 886 00:52:54,546 --> 00:52:55,546 (SIREN WAILING) 887 00:52:55,839 --> 00:52:57,256 All right! 888 00:52:57,549 --> 00:53:00,467 - Yes, honeybunch. - Dad? Where are you? 889 00:53:00,594 --> 00:53:04,680 Um... We're outside the hotel having a little cookout. 890 00:53:04,764 --> 00:53:07,725 - It's perfectly safe. - What's that noise? Is that a siren? 891 00:53:07,809 --> 00:53:11,353 Oh, those are just some wailing banshees checking in. 892 00:53:11,438 --> 00:53:12,855 Quiet, you banshees. 893 00:53:12,939 --> 00:53:15,733 We're trying to have a perfectly safe cookout over here. 894 00:53:15,817 --> 00:53:19,570 Mommy! I wanna say hi! Mommy! Mommy! 895 00:53:19,654 --> 00:53:22,531 - Papa Drac just tried to teach me how to fly. - Wait a minute. Is that the mother? 896 00:53:22,616 --> 00:53:24,325 Oh, no. Static again. 897 00:53:25,243 --> 00:53:27,036 I am coming back to the hotel right now. 898 00:53:27,120 --> 00:53:31,790 And you better be there or I swear, Dad, you're gonna be very sorry. 899 00:53:32,459 --> 00:53:35,628 - What's goin' on? - We need to get home right away. 900 00:53:35,712 --> 00:53:36,712 Whoa! 901 00:53:37,964 --> 00:53:40,591 Okay. I'll go wake up my backpack. 902 00:53:40,675 --> 00:53:42,051 Guys, we gotta move. 903 00:53:42,135 --> 00:53:44,678 We got no car! How we gonna get out of here? 904 00:53:44,763 --> 00:53:46,513 GRIFFIN: Don't worry. I made a call. 905 00:53:52,771 --> 00:53:53,771 (MAKING NONSENSICAL SOUNDS) 906 00:53:55,649 --> 00:53:59,109 I'm sorry, Blobby. We really meant to call you sooner. 907 00:54:05,492 --> 00:54:06,825 Hit it! 908 00:54:21,841 --> 00:54:24,093 - Transylvania. - You want to go where? 909 00:54:24,177 --> 00:54:25,761 Transylvania. As soon as possible. 910 00:54:25,845 --> 00:54:29,014 - We don't fly direct to Transylvania. - You don't? 911 00:54:29,099 --> 00:54:33,435 You can go to Bucharest, but you'll have to switch planes in Chicago and then Zürich. 912 00:54:33,520 --> 00:54:34,770 So, when would we get there? 913 00:54:34,854 --> 00:54:38,148 Well, the Chicago flight's delayed due to bad weather. 914 00:54:38,483 --> 00:54:39,483 (GROWLING) 915 00:54:43,822 --> 00:54:45,698 So, two seats in coach? 916 00:54:45,991 --> 00:54:47,032 No! 917 00:54:47,534 --> 00:54:49,201 - No! - Yes. 918 00:55:01,548 --> 00:55:03,966 (JONATHAN CHEERING) 919 00:55:06,720 --> 00:55:07,720 (MAKING NONSENSICAL SOUNDS) 920 00:55:08,847 --> 00:55:11,807 You have to go now? When we finally have no traffic. 921 00:55:11,891 --> 00:55:13,892 You're killing me, Blobby. 922 00:55:21,443 --> 00:55:22,443 (CHEERING) 923 00:55:23,403 --> 00:55:26,613 I still have some cloud on me. Gotta do a selfie! 924 00:55:26,698 --> 00:55:29,742 - Johnny! Not now! - Okay. Maybe later. 925 00:55:31,202 --> 00:55:32,202 (HONKING) 926 00:55:35,457 --> 00:55:38,417 This scooter thing's out ofjuice. We're never gonna make it. 927 00:55:38,501 --> 00:55:40,127 Frank, blow. 928 00:55:49,429 --> 00:55:50,554 Now! 929 00:55:55,685 --> 00:55:56,685 (ALL CHEERING) 930 00:56:11,326 --> 00:56:12,326 (DRACULA LAUGHING) 931 00:56:12,911 --> 00:56:16,580 How fun is this? Why are you laughing? You like that? 932 00:56:16,664 --> 00:56:17,664 Watch this. 933 00:56:17,749 --> 00:56:18,749 (BLOBBY MAKING NONSENSICAL SOUNDS) 934 00:56:19,376 --> 00:56:20,751 DRACULA: Coochie-coochie-coochie-coo! 935 00:56:22,462 --> 00:56:23,796 - (GASPS) - (MURRAY SCREAMING) 936 00:56:29,594 --> 00:56:33,680 - Now this is flying, Denisovich. - Like a vampire. 937 00:56:33,765 --> 00:56:34,765 (CHUCKLES) 938 00:56:35,183 --> 00:56:36,183 DENNIS: Wee! 939 00:56:37,310 --> 00:56:40,187 That's my boy. Look at you go. 940 00:56:40,271 --> 00:56:41,271 (LAUGHING) 941 00:56:45,360 --> 00:56:46,360 (QUACKING) 942 00:56:48,988 --> 00:56:52,491 DENNIS: You're the coolest guy who wears a cape, Papa Drac. 943 00:56:52,575 --> 00:56:53,575 (MURRAY SCREAMING) 944 00:57:04,879 --> 00:57:05,879 Ugh! 945 00:57:14,139 --> 00:57:15,139 (DENNIS CHUCKLES) 946 00:57:19,185 --> 00:57:20,185 (DIALING TONE) 947 00:57:20,854 --> 00:57:23,772 So, hey, when are you going to get here already? 948 00:57:23,857 --> 00:57:25,732 We've been waiting... 949 00:57:26,568 --> 00:57:27,609 (GASPS) 950 00:57:27,694 --> 00:57:29,611 Give me my son. 951 00:57:29,696 --> 00:57:32,239 We just went out for some avocados. 952 00:57:32,323 --> 00:57:35,117 - Mommy! I flew! - I saw. 953 00:57:35,201 --> 00:57:37,369 DRACULA: (SINGING) Mother's already nutsy koo koo 954 00:57:37,454 --> 00:57:39,705 Nutsy koo koo 955 00:57:39,873 --> 00:57:41,457 - Koo koo - COUNSELOR: Oh, dear. Oh, dear 956 00:57:41,541 --> 00:57:43,375 Oh, my devil I have to follow protocol 957 00:57:43,460 --> 00:57:45,461 That ain't happening That ain't happening 958 00:57:45,545 --> 00:57:46,837 Mother's already 959 00:57:46,921 --> 00:57:50,090 Koo koo 960 00:57:57,682 --> 00:58:01,101 I was worried Dennis wasn't safe around other monsters. 961 00:58:01,186 --> 00:58:04,229 Now I don't even feel like he's safe around you. 962 00:58:04,564 --> 00:58:06,982 - But I was just... - What was it you said? 963 00:58:07,066 --> 00:58:10,319 Human, monster, unicorn. That it didn't matter? 964 00:58:10,403 --> 00:58:12,529 Well, I just know his life would... 965 00:58:12,614 --> 00:58:15,324 We'll have his birthday party here on Wednesday. 966 00:58:15,408 --> 00:58:16,742 Then we're moving. 967 00:58:17,118 --> 00:58:19,995 Please, Mavey. Don't leave. 968 00:58:20,079 --> 00:58:22,623 Maybe you've let humans into your hotel, Dad. 969 00:58:23,208 --> 00:58:25,751 But I don't think you've let them into your heart. 970 00:58:41,017 --> 00:58:42,017 (SIGHS) 971 00:58:44,020 --> 00:58:45,020 (THUNDER RUMBLING) 972 00:58:49,025 --> 00:58:50,025 (SIGHS) 973 00:58:57,492 --> 00:58:58,492 Hmm... 974 00:59:10,004 --> 00:59:12,923 DENNIS: I can do it. I can do it. 975 00:59:13,424 --> 00:59:15,968 I'm a bat. I'm a bat. 976 00:59:16,594 --> 00:59:18,554 I'm a bat. I'm a bat. I'm a bat! 977 00:59:18,638 --> 00:59:22,474 - Dennis? What are you doing, sweetie? - Uh... Nothing. 978 00:59:22,559 --> 00:59:25,519 Careful. Let me help you down from there. 979 00:59:25,603 --> 00:59:27,896 Are you getting excited about your big party? 980 00:59:27,981 --> 00:59:29,565 I guess so. 981 00:59:29,649 --> 00:59:32,734 You know who's coming? Daddy's whole family. 982 00:59:32,819 --> 00:59:34,736 Grandpa Mike and Grandma Linda. 983 00:59:34,821 --> 00:59:38,574 All your cousins and aunts and uncles who love you so much. 984 00:59:38,658 --> 00:59:42,744 And then they're gonna be with us when we move to California. 985 00:59:42,829 --> 00:59:47,457 Mommy, are we going away cebause I'm not a monster? 986 00:59:47,542 --> 00:59:51,086 What? No. Dennis, of course not. 987 00:59:51,170 --> 00:59:53,547 It's just grown-up stuff. 988 00:59:53,631 --> 00:59:56,383 Okay. But what about Papa Drac? 989 00:59:56,467 --> 00:59:58,885 He's gonna be here all alone. 990 00:59:58,970 --> 01:00:01,722 Papa Drac has to stay here to run the hotel. 991 01:00:01,806 --> 01:00:04,600 But he'll visit us. And we'll visit him. 992 01:00:04,684 --> 01:00:08,061 - Can we call him every night? - Sure. 993 01:00:13,693 --> 01:00:15,110 Awesome! 994 01:00:15,194 --> 01:00:17,029 Hello. We're here. 995 01:00:17,113 --> 01:00:18,113 (ALL GREETING) 996 01:00:19,032 --> 01:00:24,328 (SINGING) The night brings Johnny's family here 997 01:00:24,412 --> 01:00:29,291 To take away all that Drac holds dear 998 01:00:29,375 --> 01:00:30,459 Welcome, welcome. 999 01:00:30,543 --> 01:00:32,753 Hide your feelings 1000 01:00:32,837 --> 01:00:36,632 Keep them all inside 1001 01:00:39,510 --> 01:00:40,510 (GROANING) 1002 01:00:43,306 --> 01:00:46,224 Dude, why do you wanna leave? This place is out of control. 1003 01:00:46,309 --> 01:00:47,684 I don't wanna leave. 1004 01:00:47,769 --> 01:00:49,728 All these awesome freakazoids! 1005 01:00:49,812 --> 01:00:53,231 - So, who's the coolest monster? - Kakie. 1006 01:00:53,316 --> 01:00:55,734 - Kakie. - Kakie. What a wussbag. (CHUCKLES) 1007 01:00:56,653 --> 01:00:59,571 Isn't it nice to have the whole family together? 1008 01:01:00,156 --> 01:01:04,409 Mavis, do you have any cousins or thingies in your family? 1009 01:01:04,494 --> 01:01:06,495 No. It's just been me and Dad. 1010 01:01:06,579 --> 01:01:09,206 I never did ask how you lost your mom. 1011 01:01:09,290 --> 01:01:11,583 Oh. She was killed by angry humans. 1012 01:01:11,668 --> 01:01:12,668 Oh... 1013 01:01:12,919 --> 01:01:15,253 Awkward 1014 01:01:15,588 --> 01:01:19,257 - But there is my Grandpa Vlad. - Oh, you have a grandpa? 1015 01:01:19,342 --> 01:01:22,678 - Yeah. He'll be at the party. I invited him. - (SPITS) 1016 01:01:22,762 --> 01:01:24,096 You invited him? 1017 01:01:24,180 --> 01:01:28,350 Dad, he's never seen Dennis. I wanted them to meet once before we go. 1018 01:01:28,434 --> 01:01:32,896 Sure. Great. Peachy. Good old Vlad. 1019 01:01:32,980 --> 01:01:35,190 Anybody have a wet wipe? 1020 01:01:52,458 --> 01:01:57,045 Holy rabies. He finally invites me to something. 1021 01:01:57,130 --> 01:02:00,132 - He's got a grandkid? - And he never told you? 1022 01:02:00,216 --> 01:02:04,553 Easy, Bela. At least there's another vampire in the family. 1023 01:02:04,637 --> 01:02:07,472 It's at a hotel? Fancy schmancy. 1024 01:02:07,557 --> 01:02:10,642 Hotels are for humans! 1025 01:02:10,852 --> 01:02:11,893 (ALL GROWLING) 1026 01:02:15,690 --> 01:02:18,567 Bela, shut your blood hole. Look what you started. 1027 01:02:18,651 --> 01:02:20,068 Don't worry, gang. 1028 01:02:20,153 --> 01:02:23,905 I raised my son to hate and kill and steal the souls of humans 1029 01:02:23,990 --> 01:02:25,490 like a good boy. 1030 01:02:25,908 --> 01:02:28,952 Yes, Grandpa Vlad will be so happy 1031 01:02:29,036 --> 01:02:33,915 when he sees the big masquerade party Johnny and I have planned. 1032 01:02:34,000 --> 01:02:35,167 What? 1033 01:02:38,337 --> 01:02:41,590 - Play along. It's my dad. - You have a dad? That's funny. 1034 01:02:41,674 --> 01:02:44,384 Listen to me. My dad cannot know you're a human. 1035 01:02:44,469 --> 01:02:46,428 Or any of your family. 1036 01:02:46,512 --> 01:02:48,805 What? But, Drac, I'm proud that we're... 1037 01:02:48,890 --> 01:02:51,975 Or he'll steal your family's souls and eat your backpack. 1038 01:02:52,059 --> 01:02:53,059 (GASPS) 1039 01:02:54,520 --> 01:02:55,812 That's right, gang. 1040 01:02:55,897 --> 01:02:59,399 We're gonna make the birthday a monster masquerade party. 1041 01:03:00,109 --> 01:03:01,818 - Really? - Oh, that's lovely. 1042 01:03:01,903 --> 01:03:06,615 Sort of like a last hurrah before Dennis gets to be with normal people. 1043 01:03:06,699 --> 01:03:09,159 I couldn't have said it better. 1044 01:03:14,040 --> 01:03:15,582 (CHILDREN CHATTERING) 1045 01:03:20,546 --> 01:03:21,546 (GROANING) 1046 01:03:26,886 --> 01:03:27,886 (CHUCKLING) 1047 01:03:28,054 --> 01:03:32,140 What do you think, Mavis? I think I'm starting to like being creepy. 1048 01:03:32,225 --> 01:03:33,725 (BOTH CHUCKLING) 1049 01:03:37,146 --> 01:03:40,023 You're lucky we don't call the authorities. 1050 01:03:40,107 --> 01:03:41,983 Let's go, my hero. 1051 01:03:42,068 --> 01:03:43,777 Cebause I'm Batman! 1052 01:03:44,654 --> 01:03:46,947 Yes! To the Batmobile! 1053 01:03:48,074 --> 01:03:49,074 (LAUGHING) 1054 01:03:52,411 --> 01:03:54,579 - Got your butt kicked by a girl, Batman. - (GROWLING) 1055 01:03:57,083 --> 01:03:59,918 Yeah. Whatever. I'm not about to cry. 1056 01:04:00,336 --> 01:04:01,336 (CRYING) 1057 01:04:03,256 --> 01:04:06,508 Hotel Transylvania. 1058 01:04:06,676 --> 01:04:10,178 I smell humans! 1059 01:04:10,263 --> 01:04:12,764 Tear it down! 1060 01:04:12,849 --> 01:04:17,519 Bela, we're in the outside world. You're gonna smell humans. 1061 01:04:17,603 --> 01:04:21,273 You know what? Just wait outside for me. This is family stuff. 1062 01:04:21,357 --> 01:04:22,941 You'll only get in the way. 1063 01:04:23,025 --> 01:04:24,943 I just wanna meet the little fanger. 1064 01:04:25,027 --> 01:04:28,113 - He should know his great-vampa. - His what? 1065 01:04:28,197 --> 01:04:31,825 Vampire grandpa. Come on. That was obvious. 1066 01:04:33,953 --> 01:04:35,704 - Amazing party! - (CHUCKLES) 1067 01:04:35,788 --> 01:04:38,456 So, what do you think? 1068 01:04:38,541 --> 01:04:41,209 This is your vampire costume? What are you, nuts? 1069 01:04:41,294 --> 01:04:42,502 I ordered it online. 1070 01:04:42,587 --> 01:04:44,504 It was the only place that delivered overnight. 1071 01:04:44,589 --> 01:04:46,965 You look like you got a baboon's butt on your head. 1072 01:04:47,049 --> 01:04:51,052 Have you at least practiced your voice? You can't just talk like a hippie. 1073 01:04:51,137 --> 01:04:54,806 - I'm not a hippie. I'm a slacker. - Talk like a vampire. 1074 01:04:55,308 --> 01:05:00,437 My name is Count Jonafang. I am a vampire. 1075 01:05:00,521 --> 01:05:04,441 Okay, vampires don't go around saying, "I am a vampire. " 1076 01:05:04,525 --> 01:05:09,029 Sorry. I am Count Jonafang. Bleh, bleh-bleh. 1077 01:05:09,196 --> 01:05:11,781 - Are you kidding me? - I'm sorry. I'm nervous. 1078 01:05:11,866 --> 01:05:14,159 Yeah, listen, if you think I don't like it, 1079 01:05:14,243 --> 01:05:17,996 you definitely don't want to say, "Bleh, bleh-bleh," in front of my father. 1080 01:05:18,080 --> 01:05:21,291 - Sir, Master Kakie has arrived. - Oh, hey. 1081 01:05:21,375 --> 01:05:24,252 Drac, this is Brandon, a. k. a. Kakie. 1082 01:05:24,337 --> 01:05:26,338 - We got him for Dennis. - Hey, man. 1083 01:05:26,422 --> 01:05:28,131 Nauseated to meet you. 1084 01:05:28,215 --> 01:05:31,051 When does this happen? I got a book fair in half an hour. 1085 01:05:34,680 --> 01:05:37,349 All right. Where's my vampson? 1086 01:05:39,685 --> 01:05:43,104 Oh, please. Still has to make a dramatic entrance. 1087 01:05:43,189 --> 01:05:47,984 - Dad! Look at you! - So you run a hotel now? 1088 01:05:48,069 --> 01:05:51,780 From Prince of Darkness to King of Room Service. 1089 01:05:51,864 --> 01:05:54,115 Yes. So good to see you. (NERVOUS CHUCKLE) 1090 01:05:54,200 --> 01:05:56,242 I'll be right with you. 1091 01:06:01,040 --> 01:06:04,376 Keep Vlad away from the humans and Mavis. 1092 01:06:05,252 --> 01:06:06,419 I'm on it. 1093 01:06:07,088 --> 01:06:10,423 Oh, now that is a neat costume. 1094 01:06:10,508 --> 01:06:14,803 - (SNIFFING) These two smell funny. - Oh, you're European. 1095 01:06:14,887 --> 01:06:17,222 It's called deodorant. 1096 01:06:17,306 --> 01:06:20,475 Nothing like insulting an entire continent, Linda. 1097 01:06:20,559 --> 01:06:22,519 Hey, Count! How goes it? Frankenstein. 1098 01:06:22,603 --> 01:06:24,688 Actually, I'm technically Frankenstein's monster. 1099 01:06:24,772 --> 01:06:26,189 Frankenstein, he's the doctor who... 1100 01:06:26,273 --> 01:06:29,234 Would love to hear more. Call my people. 1101 01:06:29,568 --> 01:06:32,153 So, let me introduce you to some of your son's other buddies. 1102 01:06:33,239 --> 01:06:36,491 - This is Murray. - Please don't kill me! 1103 01:06:36,575 --> 01:06:39,369 I mean, yo, V! What's up? 1104 01:06:39,453 --> 01:06:42,580 Talking toilet paper. Well, that's a new one. 1105 01:06:43,582 --> 01:06:46,042 All right! Where's the kid? That's who I wanna meet. 1106 01:06:46,127 --> 01:06:47,502 Johnny! 1107 01:06:50,172 --> 01:06:53,049 This is Dracula's son-in-law. 1108 01:06:53,134 --> 01:06:56,928 I am Count Jonafang. 1109 01:06:57,013 --> 01:06:59,347 Bleh, bleh, black sheep. 1110 01:06:59,432 --> 01:07:02,392 Have you any wool? 1111 01:07:02,476 --> 01:07:04,227 What's that thing on your head? 1112 01:07:04,311 --> 01:07:06,855 Looks like my grandmother's boobies. 1113 01:07:06,939 --> 01:07:07,939 (LAUGHING) 1114 01:07:09,150 --> 01:07:11,401 Daddy, who's the man with the funny face? 1115 01:07:11,485 --> 01:07:14,070 - Is this the kid? - It sure is. 1116 01:07:14,155 --> 01:07:15,739 Let me see those fangs. 1117 01:07:15,823 --> 01:07:16,906 What are you doin'? 1118 01:07:16,991 --> 01:07:18,450 Oh, I just love him so much. 1119 01:07:18,576 --> 01:07:22,120 I want to hug him right in the fangs that he has. 1120 01:07:24,123 --> 01:07:27,834 I repeat, lemme see those fangs. 1121 01:07:37,136 --> 01:07:40,180 Oh, he's a late fanger, just like you. 1122 01:07:40,306 --> 01:07:42,932 Yes. Yes. (NERVOUS CHUCKLE) Just like me. 1123 01:07:44,518 --> 01:07:47,562 The big shot here was a little crybaby, all right. 1124 01:07:47,646 --> 01:07:50,148 - Yes, yes, I was. - Used to pee in his bed. 1125 01:07:50,232 --> 01:07:51,441 Okay, Dad. 1126 01:07:51,525 --> 01:07:54,444 We just need to scare the fangs out of the kid. 1127 01:07:54,528 --> 01:07:55,987 Hare ha hangs? 1128 01:07:56,072 --> 01:07:58,740 Yeah, it's what I did for Mr. Tough Guy here. 1129 01:07:58,824 --> 01:08:03,745 First, you've got to possess something the late fanger finds sweet and innocent. 1130 01:08:03,829 --> 01:08:06,122 - Then you show them what's what and... - (GASPING) 1131 01:08:06,207 --> 01:08:07,207 Pop! 1132 01:08:07,374 --> 01:08:11,419 Trust me. It'll scare the fangs right out. Right, Drac? 1133 01:08:11,504 --> 01:08:15,548 Seriously, guys, if I'm late for the book fair, I'll miss the street fair. 1134 01:08:16,175 --> 01:08:17,759 - That's your guy. - (CHUCKLES) 1135 01:08:18,344 --> 01:08:21,262 Possessed? But Dennis will be so upset. 1136 01:08:21,347 --> 01:08:23,348 Don't you get it? This is our ticket. 1137 01:08:23,432 --> 01:08:26,476 If it works for Denisovich, boom! He's a vampire. 1138 01:08:26,560 --> 01:08:30,230 - And you all get to stay here. - All right. All right. 1139 01:08:31,065 --> 01:08:32,774 - Capisce. - Good call. 1140 01:08:33,025 --> 01:08:35,819 Kids, everyone, have a seat. 1141 01:08:35,903 --> 01:08:38,530 Dennis has a big surprise for you. 1142 01:08:38,614 --> 01:08:42,867 The one and only Kakie, The Cake Monster! 1143 01:08:43,035 --> 01:08:46,538 Hey, kids! It's me, Kakie! 1144 01:08:47,039 --> 01:08:50,250 What a wonderful Kakie day it is! 1145 01:08:50,417 --> 01:08:54,587 Now, I have a question. Who here loves cake? 1146 01:08:58,175 --> 01:08:59,175 (LAUGHING) 1147 01:08:59,969 --> 01:09:01,052 Rise! 1148 01:09:01,679 --> 01:09:02,720 Whoa, whoa... 1149 01:09:07,059 --> 01:09:08,059 (SNIFFING) 1150 01:09:08,894 --> 01:09:12,021 BRANDON: Why am I floating? Can I have the stage manager, please? 1151 01:09:12,106 --> 01:09:13,898 This isn't working for me. 1152 01:09:14,066 --> 01:09:15,066 Whoa... 1153 01:09:18,404 --> 01:09:19,404 ALL: Wow! 1154 01:09:20,114 --> 01:09:23,575 Scary, Denisovich? You feeling anything? Any change? 1155 01:09:23,659 --> 01:09:25,243 Is Kakie okay? 1156 01:09:25,911 --> 01:09:26,911 (KAKIE GROWLING) 1157 01:09:27,079 --> 01:09:31,416 I want all the cake. Sharing is for cowards. 1158 01:09:31,584 --> 01:09:32,584 (LAUGHING) 1159 01:09:34,003 --> 01:09:37,338 I don't remember any of this from the TV show. 1160 01:09:37,423 --> 01:09:40,466 Um... I think I saw it on a Blu-ray disc, bonus stuff. 1161 01:09:40,551 --> 01:09:42,719 Wait, why is Grandpa Vlad up there? 1162 01:09:42,845 --> 01:09:43,845 (CHUCKLING) 1163 01:09:49,018 --> 01:09:52,020 I'm scared, Papa. What's happening to Kakie? 1164 01:09:56,192 --> 01:09:59,819 You don't eat cake. Cake eat you! 1165 01:09:59,987 --> 01:10:02,780 - No! - Stop it! 1166 01:10:04,742 --> 01:10:05,742 (GASPS) 1167 01:10:05,826 --> 01:10:08,620 BRANDON: What just happened, man? I'm outta here. 1168 01:10:08,787 --> 01:10:11,873 None of these parents better review this on Yelp. 1169 01:10:12,291 --> 01:10:13,541 Hey, what did you just do? 1170 01:10:13,626 --> 01:10:16,461 A few more seconds and the kid's fangs would have popped right out. 1171 01:10:16,545 --> 01:10:20,048 - I don't care. It's not worth it. - What's not worth it? 1172 01:10:20,132 --> 01:10:23,551 It was my last attempt to make the boy a vampire, so you'd stay. 1173 01:10:23,636 --> 01:10:26,804 By ruining his favorite thing? How could you do that? 1174 01:10:26,889 --> 01:10:27,972 We were desperate. 1175 01:10:28,057 --> 01:10:31,392 - You were in on this? - Dennis won't be happy in my town. 1176 01:10:31,477 --> 01:10:33,228 Dennis hasn't been there. 1177 01:10:33,312 --> 01:10:35,230 (SINGING) Now husband and wife 1178 01:10:35,314 --> 01:10:37,649 Feel the strain and the strife 1179 01:10:37,733 --> 01:10:39,317 ALL: Shut up! 1180 01:10:39,401 --> 01:10:41,986 Johnny, Dennis is not a monster. 1181 01:10:43,197 --> 01:10:46,741 - He likes avocado. - 'Cause you don't let him eat anything fun. 1182 01:10:46,825 --> 01:10:48,910 I think Dennis just wants to be normal. 1183 01:10:48,994 --> 01:10:51,412 Can we stop using the word "normal"? 1184 01:10:51,497 --> 01:10:53,665 Where we live now, he's normal. 1185 01:10:53,749 --> 01:10:57,919 He is who he is. And you can't change him, Dad. 1186 01:11:00,506 --> 01:11:03,675 WINNIE: Dennis, where are you going? DENNIS: Away. 1187 01:11:05,010 --> 01:11:07,428 But it's not safe out here by yourself. 1188 01:11:07,513 --> 01:11:10,932 I know a place where we can hide. Follow me. 1189 01:11:17,022 --> 01:11:18,231 If you didn't stop me, 1190 01:11:18,315 --> 01:11:21,609 my great-grandson wouldn't have to be a wimp his whole life 1191 01:11:21,694 --> 01:11:23,278 like Schlumpy over here. 1192 01:11:23,362 --> 01:11:25,321 - A wimp? - Johnny, be cool. 1193 01:11:25,406 --> 01:11:27,365 You wanna throw down, old man? 1194 01:11:27,449 --> 01:11:31,244 - Certified yellow belt since 1997. - No! 1195 01:11:31,328 --> 01:11:35,832 - What's this now? You're not a vampire? - Bleh? 1196 01:11:35,916 --> 01:11:40,586 Of course he's human. He's our son. You think we're monsters? 1197 01:11:43,549 --> 01:11:48,511 You! You let your daughter marry a human and have a human kid? 1198 01:11:48,595 --> 01:11:51,764 Why don't you just put a stake through my heart. 1199 01:11:51,849 --> 01:11:55,310 We don't hate humans anymore, and they don't hate us. 1200 01:11:58,981 --> 01:12:01,149 Humans? 1201 01:12:02,401 --> 01:12:03,484 You're a fool. 1202 01:12:03,569 --> 01:12:09,073 Your great-grandson is the sweetest, kindest, most special boy I've ever met. 1203 01:12:09,158 --> 01:12:13,077 And if you can't give him the love he deserves because he's half-human, 1204 01:12:13,162 --> 01:12:14,787 then you're the fool. 1205 01:12:16,123 --> 01:12:17,248 Oh, Daddy. 1206 01:12:19,335 --> 01:12:23,087 - Hey, where is Dennis? Dennis! - Dennis? 1207 01:12:26,258 --> 01:12:29,344 Happy birthday, Dennis. I made you a treat. 1208 01:12:29,428 --> 01:12:31,179 - Dead pigeon? - Enjoy it. 1209 01:12:31,263 --> 01:12:34,182 'Cause once I graduate business school and start running a company, 1210 01:12:34,266 --> 01:12:37,226 you're not gonna get home-cooked meals like this anymore. 1211 01:12:37,311 --> 01:12:40,855 I have to move away, Winnie. To California. 1212 01:12:40,939 --> 01:12:46,194 My mommy thinks I'm not happy here cebause I don't have hair on my face like you. 1213 01:12:46,278 --> 01:12:48,404 I'm sorry I'm not a monster. 1214 01:12:48,489 --> 01:12:52,033 No, you are perfect. You're the nicest boy I know. 1215 01:12:52,117 --> 01:12:56,204 - And I have 300 brothers. - You're nice, too, Winnie. 1216 01:12:56,413 --> 01:12:57,413 - (LOUD THUD) - (BOTH GASPING) 1217 01:12:58,665 --> 01:12:59,665 - (GROWLING) - (BOTH SCREAMING) 1218 01:13:00,334 --> 01:13:05,713 Well, well, well. The little human and his pet. 1219 01:13:05,881 --> 01:13:07,715 - Dennis! - Denisovich! 1220 01:13:07,800 --> 01:13:10,176 - He's not in the room. - He's not by the pool. 1221 01:13:10,677 --> 01:13:14,055 - He's not in this pot of soup. - Where could he be? 1222 01:13:14,223 --> 01:13:16,808 I don't know why I ever invited you. 1223 01:13:17,476 --> 01:13:18,893 - Dennis! - Dennis! 1224 01:13:18,977 --> 01:13:21,229 - Denisovich! - Dennis! 1225 01:13:31,156 --> 01:13:32,156 (LAUGHING) 1226 01:13:33,575 --> 01:13:35,243 Stop squirming. 1227 01:13:35,327 --> 01:13:39,288 - Why are you doing this? - Because this is wrong. 1228 01:13:39,373 --> 01:13:41,582 Why doesn't anybody get that? 1229 01:13:41,667 --> 01:13:44,836 Humans don't belong with monsters. 1230 01:13:44,920 --> 01:13:47,755 - You're wrong! - I am not! 1231 01:13:47,840 --> 01:13:50,341 I am holding you hostage. 1232 01:13:50,426 --> 01:13:55,847 And me and my crew are gonna tear that human-hugging hotel to shreds. 1233 01:13:55,931 --> 01:13:59,225 - You can't. - Really? Why not? 1234 01:13:59,309 --> 01:14:01,894 - Cebause... - Cebause, why? 1235 01:14:02,521 --> 01:14:05,189 Cebause it will make Papa Drac sad. 1236 01:14:05,441 --> 01:14:09,694 Ooh... Sad. And what are you gonna do about it? 1237 01:14:09,778 --> 01:14:11,696 I don't know. 1238 01:14:11,780 --> 01:14:13,573 You know why you don't know? 1239 01:14:13,657 --> 01:14:17,952 Cebause you're just a weak little boy. 1240 01:14:18,036 --> 01:14:19,036 (LAUGHING) 1241 01:14:19,746 --> 01:14:20,746 (GROANING) 1242 01:14:22,958 --> 01:14:24,792 (WHIMPERING) 1243 01:14:33,886 --> 01:14:39,474 (GROWLING) 1244 01:14:48,484 --> 01:14:49,567 What was that? 1245 01:14:49,902 --> 01:14:51,736 Dennis, we're coming. 1246 01:14:53,238 --> 01:14:56,532 - Are you okay, Winnie? - Yes, my zing. 1247 01:14:56,617 --> 01:14:57,658 (GASPS) 1248 01:14:57,743 --> 01:14:58,743 (GROWLING) 1249 01:14:59,369 --> 01:15:00,369 (GRUNTS) 1250 01:15:16,094 --> 01:15:17,094 (GROANING) 1251 01:15:32,528 --> 01:15:35,321 - Dennis! There he is, right there. - Dennis! Baby! 1252 01:15:35,489 --> 01:15:38,199 DRACULA: My big boy! GRIFFIN: Dennis, we were lookin' for ya. 1253 01:15:38,283 --> 01:15:40,535 - Sweetheart. - FRANKENSTEIN: I'm so happy to see you. 1254 01:15:40,619 --> 01:15:41,619 (GASPS) 1255 01:15:44,206 --> 01:15:45,957 There's his mean friends. 1256 01:15:47,543 --> 01:15:49,043 (GROANING) 1257 01:15:52,506 --> 01:15:54,674 Oh... This'll be fun. 1258 01:16:06,645 --> 01:16:07,645 (GROWLING) 1259 01:16:07,729 --> 01:16:08,729 Whoo! 1260 01:16:09,898 --> 01:16:10,898 - (SQUEAKING) - (SCREAMS) 1261 01:16:18,365 --> 01:16:19,365 (ALL GROWLING) 1262 01:16:26,415 --> 01:16:27,415 (WHISTLES) 1263 01:16:27,958 --> 01:16:28,916 Huh? 1264 01:16:29,001 --> 01:16:30,001 (ALL GROWLING) 1265 01:16:35,966 --> 01:16:36,966 (SCREAMING) 1266 01:16:44,224 --> 01:16:45,224 (GRUNTS) 1267 01:16:45,350 --> 01:16:46,350 (SCREAMING) 1268 01:16:55,527 --> 01:16:56,777 I didn't do that. 1269 01:16:56,903 --> 01:16:57,903 (KIDS SCREAMING) 1270 01:17:00,657 --> 01:17:01,657 (GASPS) 1271 01:17:03,869 --> 01:17:04,869 (ALL SCREAMING) 1272 01:17:08,582 --> 01:17:11,292 - You rock, Dennis. - He means Denisovich. 1273 01:17:11,376 --> 01:17:12,710 Kakie rules! 1274 01:17:14,421 --> 01:17:15,421 (LOUD THUD) 1275 01:17:23,221 --> 01:17:24,930 Dennis, I'm coming. Whoa... 1276 01:17:28,727 --> 01:17:29,727 (GROANS) 1277 01:17:29,936 --> 01:17:32,313 I knew all that practice would pay off. 1278 01:17:42,574 --> 01:17:43,574 (SCREAMING) 1279 01:17:51,041 --> 01:17:52,416 (ALL CHEERING) 1280 01:17:56,004 --> 01:17:58,673 That's right, you better fly away. 1281 01:17:59,966 --> 01:18:03,678 Papa Drac, I'm a vampire and a superhero. 1282 01:18:03,762 --> 01:18:05,346 Am I cool now? 1283 01:18:05,430 --> 01:18:08,891 "Now"? Dennis, you were always cool. 1284 01:18:08,975 --> 01:18:13,562 Human, vampire, unicorn, you're perfect no matter what. 1285 01:18:13,647 --> 01:18:17,608 But since I'm a vampire, can we stay here? 1286 01:18:18,193 --> 01:18:19,318 Yes. 1287 01:18:19,403 --> 01:18:21,946 - All right! Yeah! - GRIFFIN: All right! 1288 01:18:23,699 --> 01:18:28,119 But you have to know, we're going to visit you here every holiday. 1289 01:18:28,203 --> 01:18:30,204 - That's fine. - That's fine. 1290 01:18:30,288 --> 01:18:31,288 (BOTH MOANING) 1291 01:18:34,459 --> 01:18:35,459 (CHUCKLES) 1292 01:18:39,840 --> 01:18:40,840 Aah! 1293 01:18:45,804 --> 01:18:50,141 Don't ever come near me or my family again. 1294 01:18:53,520 --> 01:18:54,729 No! 1295 01:19:01,278 --> 01:19:02,278 (CHUCKLES) 1296 01:19:03,655 --> 01:19:07,324 Daddy, you just saved a human. 1297 01:19:07,659 --> 01:19:12,329 (CHUCKLING) All this pressure about when the boy's fangs were coming out. 1298 01:19:12,414 --> 01:19:17,668 - Who cares? Mine came out years ago! Look. - (DENNIS CHUCKLING) 1299 01:19:17,753 --> 01:19:20,755 Okay, Dad, put 'em back in before we all barf. 1300 01:19:20,839 --> 01:19:24,717 Hey! Isn't it still somebody's birthday? 1301 01:19:24,801 --> 01:19:25,760 (ALL CHEERING) 1302 01:19:25,844 --> 01:19:26,844 (MUSIC PLAYING) 1303 01:19:38,064 --> 01:19:39,064 (CHUCKLING) 1304 01:19:55,332 --> 01:19:56,332 (ALL CHEERING) 1305 01:20:06,593 --> 01:20:07,593 (BOTH EXCLAIMING) 1306 01:20:19,606 --> 01:20:20,606 (GASPS) 1307 01:20:20,732 --> 01:20:22,566 MAVIS: Let me hear you sing! 1308 01:20:24,402 --> 01:20:25,986 I didn't do that.