- Are you in love with him?
- Absolutely, I wanna spend the rest of my life with him.
- Hello, we saw you left a comment on Jaymes's page.
- Yeah, yeah, cool.
- Just friends? - You are just friends?
- I'm hurt, I don't know what to do.
- Wow, not the response I expected.
[chime] Oh--
- Look who decided to join us. - Wait a second,
I can't believe you're ahead of me today.
How did that happen?
- Today I woke up and chose timeliness.
- Wow, you look great!
Look at those braiiiids!
- I just switched it up.
- All right. Check the old email.
Here we go, my friend doesn't see it.
- Uh-oh.
My name is Emilee, I'm 22 and I'm from Ohio.
I need your help for my best friend Alexis.
I believe she's getting catfished.
Alexis is dating a guy named Jaymes.
They met on Tumblr five years ago.
She's obsessed with him.
But everything about their relationship is not normal.
They've never talked on the phone or video chatted.
It's been five years. That's crazy.
- That's insane.
- The worst part is that they were supposed to meet
a couple of years ago and Alexis
was super excited about it...
but he just ghosted her.
For six months.
- That's a long time.
- ♪ I'm the fool for you ♪
- And now Alexis wants to move to Canada--
- God! - To be with him.
♪ ♪
She's totally putting her life on hold for this guy
and they've never even met.
- ♪ Like the fool for you ♪
- I know this is a huge mistake for her.
Jaymes is a catfish.
I'm hoping you guys can help her see the light
before it's too late. Emilee.
- ♪ I'm a fool for you ♪
- Emilee's Right. - Yeah.
- This episode is over.
- Let's give Emilee a text. Here we go. Hey, Emilee.
- Who doesn't talk to somebody on the phone for five years
and it's the person that they say they are.
There's no way.
- There's really no excuse. - Oh my God.
[doorbell sound] both: Oh, hey.
- Hey. - What's up, Emilee?
- Not much, just chillin'.
- Lots to talk about.
- Where did you meet Alexis?
- We actually met in seventh grade.
She was getting bullied a lot,
which I wasn't okay with at all.
- You had her back then, and you have her back now.
- Always.
- And do you and Alexis hang out often?
- Yeah.
- Do you guys ever hang out on like, Tuesday nights at 9:00?
- And watch "Catfish"? - And watch "Catfish"?
Has she ever even seen the show, "Catfish"?
- Yes, she has.
We're actually watching it the other day together.
- So surely when watching the show
you must look at her and say--
- Jaymes, you connection?
Do you see?
- What does she say when you suggest
that this guy might not be who she thinks he is?
- She just makes excuses for him.
She'll say that he's very insecure, or he's busy.
I'm like he's been busy for five years, though?
I mean, if you care about someone,
you make time and effort to talk to them.
- Right, I assume Alexis is frustrated, right?
- I honestly don't think so.
Like I think she just believes these excuses.
I think it's from like all the bullying and stuff.
I think she was just lonely
and just wanted someone to be there.
- Yeah.
- And now she wants to move to Canada and be with him.
And I just--I don't think it's smart at all.
She's blinded by love.
- How do you think Alexis will react
when she finds out you're talking to us?
- I've threatened it before in the past,
but I don't think she thought I was serious.
So she might be like,
just a tiny bit hurt that I don't believe her.
But also, she might be excited to try to prove me wrong.
- Mm-hmm. Well, I wanna talk to Alexis, obviously.
- Yeah, what's her number?
- 937...[bleep].
- It's ringing. - Hello.
- Hello, Alexis. - Yes.
- Aah, well, no easy way to say this.
It is Nev from "Catfish." - Hi.
- And I'm here with your OG, Emilee.
- Oh, okay.
- I understand you're in a relationship with a young man
who you've never met, and we wanna help.
- I don't even know what to say.
I mean, I did not think
she'd actually go through with all this.
That's great. I mean, I'm down.
- Great! I'll just text you our Zoom link,
so you can join us on the call and you can fill us in.
- Okay. All right. Thank you.
- Bye. - Bye.
- She sounds so sweet. - She is. She's a sweetheart.
[doorbell sounds] - Oh.
- Heeey. - Hi.
- Good to meet you.
- It's good to meet you, too.
- I'm glad that you're not upset--
- Oh yeah.
- that she reached out on your behalf.
- No, that's Emilee.
She's always been like that for me.
Just like really want to make sure
that what's going on is what's going on.
- Alright, well, listen, Emilee, we'll let you go.
But thank you for connecting us.
- Any well wishes, Emilee? - I hope he's real.
I mean, I really do for your sake,
but I just don't see it happening.
- I mean, I'm pretty sure he's not a catfish.
So, I'm not super worried.
- That might be the problem. - [laughs]
- All right, Emilee. Talk soon.
- Bye. - Bye.
- Now you're with us. Hahaha.
- Yeah. - Just kidding.
- So wait second, so just tell us about yourself
first a little bit. So we kinda know who you are.
- I just graduated with my bachelor's in psychology
like last Saturday.
- Whoa. - Congratulations!
- Thank you.
- What's your ambition with your psychology degree?
- I wanna be a forensic psychologist.
- So you intend to have a career identifying people
who are likely to do things that are bad or questionable?
- Questionable. Yeah.
- Would you say you've applied
that knowledge to your boyfriend?
- There's some things that it's like, it's weird,
but maybe I'm just like,
so in love with him that I just don't see it.
- Okay. So wait a second.
Tell us a little bit about Jaymes.
- He works in a bookstore. - Okay.
- And I love that. - He's, he's your age?
- Yeah, he's a year older than me. -
- Where does he say he lives?
- Tell us how you guys met, all the way back.
What's the whole story, how we got to today?
- All right. So I moved when I was in sixth grade,
like halfway through the year,
and people just didn't seem to like me.
And there was always little things that they would find
and like pick on me for. I eventually got to the point
where I just couldn't go to school anymore.
So we decided to homeschool.
And when I did that, I was like,
"Well, now I don't have any friends."
The only person I would talk to you
for a really long time was Emilee.
Eventually, I got on Tumblr,
and that's how I ended up meeting Jay.
We had blogs we would write stories.
So I would see some of his stuff,
and he was seeing some of my stuff.
And he would like it. He introduced himself.
And then from there,
we clicked instantly and just started talking.
- So how quickly did things
kind of go from friends to more than that?
- For a while, we were only like friends on Tumblr,
and then we gave each other our Facebooks.
At that point, we just didn't stop.
It was every day nonstop.
- And is it always just via text?
- Yes.
- On your phones or through an app or something?
- Just through Discord now.
I mean, I have his phone number,
but I don't wanna ask for anything, so.
- So you've never had a personal voice call with him?
- No. - What? Alexis.
- I'm smart. I promise.
- All right, listen. - Has he specifically said
he doesn't wanna talk on the phone?
- All right. He hasn't like explicitly said it,
but I know he doesn't like the sound of his own voice.
- But even if you don't like your own voice, it doesn't mean
that you can't just get on the phone once or twice,
even just to check in.
- Well, it's a little weird,
but it doesn't outweigh the rest of it.
- Well, do you feel like you guys are on the same page
about your relationship and where it's going?
- I think so.
But on New Year's, I was with Emilee,
and I was tellin' her about how I loved him,
how I really wanted him to know that.
And she was like, "We'll just tell him."
So I just started messaging him,
and then he messaged me back a couple days later,
and I do love you too and--but like when he said it,
I couldn't tell if it was like he was returning the feelings.
Or if it was like, just you know, like,
like when we say I love you all the time.
- Yeah, that's not a good sign.
- But I also like, New Year's isn't necessarily
like a great time for him anyways with that,
because of some, you know, problems.
- And Emilee mentioned that you guys had planned on meeting up,
but he just ghosted you and you didn't talk for six months?
- Yeah, in 2018.
We were talking about going to a gaming convention in Texas.
I was saving up money to get my plane ticket to go down.
And then Jay just stopped talking to me.
We didn't talk for like six months.
At that point, it hurt but it wasn't like,
if that were to happen now, I'd be devastated.
- And then how did you guys start talking again?
- He just came back online one day
and sent me some stupid meme
that he said it reminded him of me.
So we built up to talking every day again.
- What's he like? What's his personality like?
- He's really funny. He's sweet.
He's really protective.
Every time I say something that's like even just
a slightly bit negative about myself, he's like,
"No, you need to cut that [bleep] out."
- Are you in love with him? - Absolutely, 100%.
I mean, I want to spend the rest of my life with him.
- Have you talked about a future, like living together?
- We have talked a little bit about moving in together.
A couple weeks ago, he was like,
"You know, things are, are bad at home.
You just wait until I get all my health issues sorted out
and then I wanna move in with you
and it's gonna be great."
- What are his health issues?
- Um, he's Trans.
- Oh, okay. - Oh, wow.
- So there's some stuff going on
with uh, with that that he wants to get done
before the move.
- Got it. - Makes sense.
But when you started talking, Jaymes identified as a man?
- No. At that point, I think he was going by she,
but like online with like me and a couple other friends
he would go by they.
And now more recently, it's been like he.
- Okay. So you've been present for that transition?
- Yeah.
- But I can understand why getting to a certain point
in his transition is important for him.
- Right. - Right.
- To feel kind of confident in his body.
- But you also already know.
So more reason-- - Right.
- I would think for him to be like,
"Okay, I, I can trust her
with being a part of this journey with me."
- Right. I mean, I would hope.
- And he goes by Jay or Jaymes?
- I've been calling him Jay since I met him.
But more recently, when he started like,
getting like legal, legal name changes
he put Jaymes as a full name.
- So can we see some pictures of Jaymes?
- Okay. This is him.
- Oh, he's cute. - Wow, yeah, handsome.
And can we see some of your messages?
- Yeah.
- He's Mister Moon? - Yeah.
- God, you guys talk a lot. - Yeah.
- Wait, did he send you that? That balloon in the flowers?
- Yeah, he sent me flowers for my graduation.
- Aww! Come on.
- That's really nice.
- Have you ever sent him anything?
- Yeah, I sent him some classic rock vinyl.
- It was a Canadian address? - Yeah.
- So it's safe to say that he lives in Canada.
- Someone lives there.
- Right. Somebody.
- Okay. So look, if everything is true,
well then why haven't you guys video chatted?
- If Jaymes is just who he says he is,
why be so shady? What's the problem?
- I mean, that's what I want to find out.
That's what I need help with.
- Let's do a little background search on Jaymes.
Send us some pictures and, you know, whatever you have,
and we'll see what we can find.
- Time to move the ball along. - Yeah.
- Right.
- All right. Talk soon.
- Bye, Alexis. - Bye.
- Something is up.
- He's checking a lot of catfish boxes.
- And all she does is make excuses.
I mean, they've never talked on the phone.
- Right, it sounds like Alexis is only doubling down on,
on Jaymes.
She's very confident that this is going to work out,
but it could all be [bleep].
- If Jaymes does not show up and say
that he is in love with her, she's gonna be heartbroken.
- Ooh! - I have an activity.
- Oh, I hadn't even noticed the mikes--ASMR?
- Yes!
'Cause we've been doing it like all season a little bit.
But now it's time to go pro.
- Wow. - So we have a whole setup.
- Let's tell a story. [softly] It was Friday night
and Jessica was just getting home from work.
[clattering keys]
Thirsty from a hard day's work,
she went to the fridge for a cool refreshment.
[snap, fizz] - [whispers] She took a sip.
[slurping]
[both snickering]
[whispering] Thank you, for joining us.
[feedback] That [bleep] is loud.
- Okay. Back to business. All right.
So look, Alexis and Jaymes have been talking for five years.
And talking a lot. I mean, they are like as close
as I've ever seen two people on the show.
- But not close enough. - Right.
Alexis does seem so accommodating.
- Too accommodating.
She has an issue with standing up for herself.
- Right. So let's see if we can find anything about Jaymes.
All right, let's first get an email.
Here's what I know about Jaymes.
So his name is Jaymes Moon.
Here's his Facebook. His Instagram's Moonpunk.
- Cute. - And address...Alberta,
and then pics are attached.
Let me know if you need anything else. Thank you.
All right. Where do you wanna start?
- Let's look at the Instagram first.
- All right. So here's his Instagram.
He calls himself Jay native punks. Okay.
- He's giving angles.
- March 5th, looks like, 2021.
The page, you know, it looks pretty normal.
What is a little surprising is how little engagement
there is on here.
Wait a second. Here's a post with some comments.
Someone wrote back. Love you cowboy.
both: Michelle.
- Let's check her out.
- She must know him if she's writing that.
- Well, we should send her a message.
- Hey, Michelle. This is Nev from "Catfish."
Hoping you can help us with an episode
we are filming right now. Thanks.
- All right, so let's do an image search.
This looks pretty recent.
This is obviously a picture in a mask, so no...
Hang on.
Here's one where he's sort of covering his face.
And nothing.
All right, this one's like the closest to a sort of clean,
unfiltered photo.
And doesn't look like there's anything in it.
[chime]
Oh, that was Michelle, she wrote back, question mark.
Okay, like for real?
- Yes.
- Yes, for real. It's about Jaymes Moon.
- Oh, question mark, question mark, question mark.
Just call me, please.
- I'm just gonna call her.
[line ringing]
- Hello, Michelle. It's Nev.
- So have you seen the show "Catfish"?
- No, no, no. Don't worry.
Nothing weird or bad is happening.
- We saw you had left a comment on a photo
that Jaymes Moon posted.
- Yeah, okay, cool.
Have you ever met him in person?
- Cool, and you guys are just friends?
- Okay. Well, that's all helpful.
- Has he ever mentioned to you
anyone that he's dating or involved with?
- Well, okay. Cool.
Appreciate the call and nice to meet you.
- Yeah.
[both laughing]
- Okay.
Well, she did say that Jaymes works at a bookstore.
- He's also sending that random friend gifts
the same way he's sending Alexis.
- He sent her some books.
- Maybe Alexis is taking his friendship
as something more than what it just is.
- Mm... - Just a friendship.
- Oh, I see what you're saying, right.
Yeah, that could be.
So let's just do a couple things
that we haven't done yet. All right.
Let's, first of all, we haven't seen his Facebook,
Jaymes Moon.
Okay, here are some of the photos that we've seen before.
- It does concern me that pretty much every picture
that Alexis has are from Jaymes' social media.
- Right, there's that other picture.
Yeah, doesn't seem like he's ever sent her
an original photograph.
This is his most recent post. Oh, who's this?
- Asma? - Asma. She commented a meme.
- Take a deep breath. It's just a bad day.
Not a bad life. Asma [bleep].
- Okay. Oh, who is that?
- Jay Jay.
- Wait, look, there's the Jaymes Moon.
But then what's this profile?
- Jay Jay.
- Is that a different profile for the same person?
I think it is.
- That is Jaymes. - Yeah, from Edmonton.
What is this?
I wonder if Alexis knows about this other Jaymes account?
Let's see if they are mutual friends.
I don't see her, weird.
All right, well, I'm gonna message Asma,
she's friends with both profiles.
Okay, that could be a good lead.
Let's go back and just do a quick search of the address.
Yes. Okay.
- Cool, it's an apartment building.
- It's an apartment building.
[chime] - Ah.
- Oh. - It's Asma.
- Asma says, "Okay, I'm at work, but we can chat quickly."
- Oh. - Oh, she's calling.
Hello.
- How are you doing?
- Good.
Basically, you're familiar with the show, "Catfish"?
- Cool. So we are working on episode right now
that I think involves someone you know named Jaymes.
Do you know who am talking about?
- Oh, okay, cool.
Does he ever talk about like a friend in Ohio?
- Nate?
- Who's Nate?
- Oh, got it. So Jay has a boyfriend.
- This is exactly why we're calling
'cause we wanna make sure that we have the right person.
- No, I understand. So that's very helpful.
I appreciate it. Thank you. And nice to meet you.
- Okay. Bye.
Wow, that was weird. Weird for two reasons.
One, because she seemed to be acting a little cagey.
And two, he had a boyfriend.
- Has. - Well, has maybe.
- Nate. - Nate.
- We have to find him.
- Let's see if Nate's on any of his pages.
- No, his friends are blocked.
- Ooh.
- Could that be what he's been hiding this entire time?
He has a whole man?
- But I'm not sure I'm 100% ready to believe
what Asma was telling us
'cause he has his other profile that we found.
And the only reason we found it was because Asma commented,
we went to her page,
and in her friend saw that she got both profiles.
- Why is she like the common person
between the two profiles? Could Asma be Jay?
- Yeah, I mean, could it be that Asma
is somehow behind the Jaymes profile,
and might be talking to multiple people
and wasn't sure who we were calling about?
And that's why she very hesitantly said,
"Is this about Nate?"
- Why would you catfish as this very normal guy?
I don't know. I don't know what's happening.
- The frustrating thing is that there's so many possibilities,
and I cannot get a sense
of where this story is going to take us.
- Whatever the truth is, it's bad news for Alexis.
- Okay. We have some information.
There's obviously more to Jaymes' life than Alexis knows.
So we spoke to Michelle.
- He's been sending Michelle gifts,
and Michelle's relationship with Jaymes
is strictly platonic and there's no romance there.
- Raises some eyebrows, especially since
their relationship is totally platonic.
Makes me think that oh,
well, maybe he has a similar intention with Alexis.
- Yeah. - And then another friend,
this girl Asma confirms Jaymes is real says,
"Oh, is this about Nate, his boyfriend?"
And do we trust Asma?
- Either way, I don't know how to tell her that.
She's gonna be heartbroken.
- We have some information for Alexis, so let me text her.
- I'm just really concerned.
She's just gonna explain it away
like she explains everything else that he has going on.
And that's what bothers me. - Right.
[chime] - Hey.
- Hi. - All right.
We have some stuff we wanna talk to you about,
make sure we're all on the same page and kind of fill you in.
Okay. So here is his Instagram.
We saw one comment from this person, Michelle.
Do you know her? - Nope.
- We messaged Michelle.
- We talked to her on the phone.
- And we talked to her on the phone.
- And she said that she's been friends with him for a while.
And throughout the course of her and Jaymes's friendship
that he sent her gifts.
- Ah. - I just find it a little
concerning the whole time he's been sending you gifts,
he's been sending Michelle gifts.
And Michelle is saying that their relationship
is strictly platonic
and he just sends her gifts as a friend.
Is he thinking that the same kind of relationship
is what you and him have?
- Right. This might be an indication that for him,
it hasn't been more than a friendship.
- Right. That's what I'm worried about.
- Right. - Yeah, but again,
you've certainly made your feelings clear
if no other time than this past New Year's.
So he can't claim he doesn't know your feelings for him.
- Right.
- So the next thing we did was we went to his Facebook.
For the most part, didn't ring any crazy alarm bells,
but in addition to this page, we found this other profile.
- Yeah, that was the account he stopped using
because he wanted to try
and be more open with being Trans and being who he is.
So he just made a new Facebook.
- But okay.
But you didn't know about it and it doesn't seem like
there's any weird suspicious stuff going on?
- No, it's--yeah.
- Well, here's something interesting.
Did you know that there's a girl
who's friends with Jaymes on both of his accounts?
- No.
- Well, we wanted to just look a little bit more closely
at who's commenting on Jaymes' page.
One of very few comments that we had found
was this one from Asma. Do you know this person?
- Uh, he's mentioned them. That's one of his friends.
- Well, given that, you know her,
maybe we should trust what she said.
- Oh.
- 'Cause we ended up getting on a phone call with her.
And she said, "Is this about Nate?"
- I have no idea who that is.
- We don't know obviously, either.
And so I said, who's Nate?
And she said, "Nate's his boyfriend."
- Oh.
- According to Asma,
Jay has been a relationship with this guy, Nate.
- How are you interpreting everything?
- I'm, I'm definitely more hurt than like pissed off.
I'm kind of at a loss. If he's got a boyfriend,
I'm sure he didn't wanna like hurt my feelings or whatever.
I mean, I hope.
- If I were you, I would be pissed off that my boyfriend
has a boyfriend, and hasn't told me about it.
- Right. - I mean, I think that you tend
to make explanations for his behavior
and things that he doesn't do or doesn't tell you.
- Right. - I just wanna encourage you.
Let's not make excuses for him. And let's not come up
with reasons as to why he did what he did.
We need him to show up here and explain that to you.
- Right. - 'Cause you deserve that.
- I think my main thing is that I don't wanna...
make him look bad.
It's like I could go off
and say all these things about how bad he is
and then be wrong and hurt his feelings, and ruin everything.
So it's like I don't know what to do.
- What about your feelings?
- I mean, they're hurt. I'm, I'm hurt.
- Yeah, I think you have been so consumed
and tapped into his feelings
that you've forgotten about yourself.
It is time for you to stand up for yourself
and let people know how they're going to treat you.
- Right. - Right, so at this point,
the only other thing I think might be beneficial for us
is if I reached out to Jaymes to start that process
and see if we can get him to meet.
We have been speaking with your friend, Alexis,
and we'd love to help you guys
finally meet for the first time.
Hoping to find some time tomorrow that works for you.
So let me know what's best. Thanks, Nev.
Does that sound okay?
- It sounds great. - Okay. Let's see what he says.
Hopefully he'll see it and respond.
So yeah, then we'll message you in the morning.
Whether we hear something or not.
We'll check in with you and go from there.
- Let's just take it one step at a time,
but we're gonna get there. - Yeah.
- All right. We'll see you in the morning.
- Good night. - Good night.
- Makes me sad. She deserves better than this.
- It's great to put other people
and their feelings ahead of yours.
- Sometimes.
- But Alexis doesn't seem to ever put herself first,
and it's crushing her.
I just really hope she can see that and speak up for herself.
So I think we can get her to do that tomorrow.
Whatever happens, it'll be a win.
- Hey morning, check this out. I got a little update for you.
- Oh God.
- This morning I had a message from Jaymes.
Sorry, I don't really think
I'm actually ready to be completely honest with her yet.
- Well, we knew that.
- Right, then I wrote back.
Hey, Jaymes, I understand how you're feeling,
and I know this isn't easy but I promise being honest
with her will be the best thing for both of you.
I'm sure keeping the truth from Alexis hasn't been easy either.
- And no response?
- And he saw that, but he has not responded.
- Okay. So what is he not being completely honest about?
What do we think?
- Oh, I feel like the smallest version
of what's really happening here
is that he is in another relationship.
He cares about Alexis deeply.
- Right. - But he isn't at a place
where he's looking to be romantic with her.
- I don't know how I'd feel
if I found out that my boyfriend had a boyfriend.
- But not being completely honest with her
could also mean anything. He might be Asma.
- Right.
- I mean, it really leaves the door open.
- Well, she has been so understanding of Jaymes
literally their entire relationship.
- Yeah.
- So he has had zero reason to not tell her the full truth
and the full scope of what he's been dealing with.
- I know.
- But let's hit up Alexis and see how she's doing.
'Cause she was sad as [bleep] last night.
- Come on back in the Zoom.
- Heeey. - Hey.
- Wow, I love the look. - You look so cute.
- Cute shirt. - Thank you.
- How are you feelin'?
- A lot better than I was last night.
- Yeah. - We have a little update.
Yesterday we sent that message to Jaymes.
- Yeah. - This morning he responded.
He said, "I don't really think I'm actually ready
to be completely honest with her yet."
- That's scary. 'Cause I have no idea what that means.
- Neither do we. - Well, we're not sure either.
So I responded. And I just said,
"Hey, I understand how you're feeling.
And I know this isn't easy, but I promise being honest
with her is the best thing for both of you."
He saw that, but he has not responded.
- Well, I don't know what to say to that.
- Right, we were trying
to figure out what that could mean.
- If Jaymes is exactly who he says he is,
and if he currently has a boyfriend,
then that could be something
that he's not completely ready to share.
But if his feelings are not in line with yours,
I think that he has a moral obligation
to tell you that that has changed.
- Right, like I-I-I, yeah,
like I think I deserve to know. - All right, so look,
I'm gonna send another message to Jaymes and just say:
...then I think you would regret...
- I think Jaymes
needs to understand exactly how you feel.
Yesterday was really tough.
- Right. - Oh, Jaymes is typing.
Oh, my God. Give me a second. He's typing, he's typing.
Oh, he said, "You're right..."
Wow, not the response I expected.
- I don't wanna be the bearer of bad news.
But he said, "I don't wanna mess up our friendship."
- I know. This might be an indication that for him,
it hasn't been more than a friendship.
- Right.
- Yesterday, we talked about being honest with our feelings
and letting people know how we feel.
Are you still gonna tell Jaymes exactly how you've been feeling
that you're in love with him and everything else
if he says that he just wants a friendship?
- I think he deserves to know,
even if he does wanna stay friends.
- All right, well,
at the moment we're just standing by, you know?
- Right. - He said he would do it.
- Let's assume he follows through.
[chime] - Oh, Jaymes.
- We're just standing by.
Sent him the link. I told him I was waiting.
♪ ♪
- Ooh, oh.
[doorbell sound]
- [laughs]
- Hey. - Hi.
- What's up Jay or Jaymes? What do you prefer?
- Jay.
- Jay, okay, what's up? - My heart is racing.
I can see Alexis's heart racing.
- I don't even know what to say.
- I mean, I have questions.
Kamie has questions, but like, it's you, you look like you.
Why do you think
this is something you guys hadn't done up until right now?
- Honestly, a lot of it's just like,
body image issues with dysphoria,
and just everything that comes
with like being a transgender man.
And I only came out like a year and a half ago to two years.
So it was just very scary.
Alexis was the first person like I came out to.
She was very accepting right away,
but my family was not as supportive.
So I guess I was just scared that, like, Alexis
just wouldn't like me anymore, I guess.
- Right, but, but you post pictures of yourself and Alexis
sees those and you send her photos
and knowing already that she'd fully supports you
as a Trans man. - Yeah.
- It was confusing to us.
- It's just all very daunting to me, you know,
'cause like, when I first came out,
like, I barely accepted myself.
What was I gonna do if Alexis didn't accept me?
So it was just hard.
- Are you comfortable with sharing
where you are right now in your transition?
- Yeah, so I'm, I'm pretty transitioned.
I have all of my consultations booked--the next few months
is when things really start to pick up.
- Congratulations.
- Thank you. Thank you.
- All right, so hold on a second.
I just wanna kinda go over the basics. So you're 25.
- Yeah. - And you live in Canada?
- Is there anything about you or your background
that we either don't know, or that was wrong or, or--
- Um, I guess there's just like,
one thing that Alexis doesn't know.
And it's not something that I'm, like, proud of.
So November of like, 2020,
I had a relationship with a guy.
His name was Nate. It lasted for like three, four months.
- So not that long ago.
- Yeah. - But it's over now.
- Yeah.
- Were you guys just talking online?
Or were you dating in in person?
- We were dating in person. - Here's my question.
Alexis felt like you guys were more than friends.
- Yeah.
- And I think she made that clear to you.
Why were you dating other people,
unless you were not interested in,
in anything more than a friendship?
- Um...
♪ ♪
It's just that like... [sniffles]
I'm really scared to lose Alexis.
Lex's always been my best friend.
- You call her your best friend.
And that's great.
And I'm happy that you feel that close to her.
But if I were Alexis, and I heard you calling me
your best friend, despite the fact
that you definitely know I'm in love with you.
You guys talked about living together, and you're single
and it's not like you're not dating anyone.
You just were dating someone.
I would be frustrated and confused and hurt
that you don't seem
to wanna change the sort of friend zone status.
- It's just like, it's a big deal.
It's a big change.
But if Alexis wants to, like, have like, a,
an exclusive relationship, like, I'd 100% jump into that.
- But you don't wanna be the one to initiate that?
It doesn't--just I get this weird sort of like,
yeah, I'm open to it. But it's not like,
I'm in love with you, Alexis, I wanna be with you.
I'll do whatever I can.
- It's not like I have any hesitancy towards it.
The word best friend encapsulates everything.
- I don't know, it just feels like...
Okay, Alexis, I'd love to sort of sidebar
with you for a minute,
just sort of check in and debrief a bit.
- Okay. - Okay.
[chime]
- What are you thinking?
How are you feeling about all that?
- I feel good. I feel great. - Well, hold on a second here,
Jaymes had a boyfriend while you were fully in love with him
he got into a relationship, didn't tell you.
That can't feel good.
- It, I mean, it doesn't feel great,
but I think he knew that I would have felt really bad.
- I don't know. I don't wanna hear you
justifying Jaymes doing things that isn't cool.
- Right. - That's the sort of behavior
that we are concerned about you
having where you find ways of making the things
that are happening to you that you don't like justified.
- Right. - What we need to figure out
right now is like, what do you want?
- I want a relationship with her.
I wanna be monogamous, but I don't want him to do it
just because he knows I want that.
- Right. - Right, he'll either make you
a priority or he won't. And, and look,
if he's not ready and he can't do that right now,
then he has to deal with the reality of knowing
that he may never get another chance.
But like, you need to be a priority for yourself
and find someone who feels the same way.
You've been waiting for five years.
He needs to make his move now.
- You need to stand up for yourself and say,
"Hey, look, Jay, this is what I want."
Alexis, I have a feeling not a lot of people have told you
that you're awesome and hot and sexy and funny and amazing.
- And cool as [bleep]. - Super cool.
And you should be the one to say, "Hey, right now
you need to be all in. If you don't want this,
I'ma go find someone else who does."
Because there's a whole lot of people who will.
- You literally gotta disappear just like that.
- I know. Look, you're, you're only 23.
And you haven't had a ton of experience but like your--
- I'm the whole package. - Desirable.
Exactly. Say it again!
- I'm the whole package. - Very good!
There we go.
Now start [bleep] walking with that energy
'cause that is who you are.
You're cool as [bleep] and you deserve to be
with somebody who's excited about being with you.
That could be Jaymes,
but it could also be somebody else.
- Right. I agree.
- No, but. - No, but, I just agree.
- Okay. Good.
- I do wanna ask him, you know, how he's feeling.
And, you know, if he loves me. I do, I do wanna know.
- All right, so let's bring Jay back in and let you guys talk.
All right, welcome back.
Kamie and I are kinda of, we're here to listen,
but I think Alexis kinda wants to start things off.
- I mean, just to get like, to the--to the quick of it.
How do you feel about me? Like, no holds barred.
[soft music]
♪ ♪
- I love you.
And that's hard for me to say,
you know, I've never said that before to anybody.
- But are you in love with me?
- Yeah, I absolutely wanna be with you.
- Okay. So do you wanna be exclusive?
- Yeah. I just--yeah, I love you.
And I'm just sick of like,
not being able to like see you every single day.
- Can I change my relationship status on Facebook?
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Okay. That means it's official.
- Yeah. - So wait a second.
This is great. We're so happy. I'm just so curious
why then Jay hadn't you started this conversation previously?
- It was scary. It was so scary.
Lexi's like my favorite person.
Like, I don't want anything to change.
But at the same time, like I know,
things are gonna start changing,
and it's for the better,
but it's just a scary prospect to begin with.
- Did you think that Alexis
would not wanna be in a relationship with you?
- I think like with my depression and anxiety
like that's always like at the back of my mind.
- I think that when you're going through anxiety
and depression or any mental illness,
it's the head and the heart are not connected.
The head is telling you something completely different
than what the heart is telling you.
So listen to your heart. Listen to Alexis.
She'll tell you exactly how she feels.
- Yeah, I know. I know that. - Wait a second.
So you guys, sounds to me like there--
- They're boyfriend and girlfriend?
- There has been a relationship status change.
- Oh, yeah. - Absolutely!
[laughter]
- I'm just so proud. I'm very happy.
I think that both of you have been through so much.
I think that having someone who has your back is--
- Monumental. - Yeah.
- Yeah, I'm happy for you guys.
I'm glad this happened.
You guys clearly have an amazing connection.
And I'm very excited for both of you to see where this goes.
- Yeah, me too.
- Yay! - All right, guys. Have fun.
- Bye guys. - Bye.
- Wow. We did it. We did it. We did it. Yay.
- ♪ Baby, we could do that crazy ♪
♪ Love is too just maybe ♪
♪ Make it to the end ♪
- Deon has been talking to the Lanise for two years.
- She helped me level up. You can't put a price on what she did for me.
- Hey, are you doing an episode on me right now?
- Oh, are there a whole ring of girls in Houston
out to get Deon? You weren't in a relationship
when you first started talking to her, were you?
- It's a long story. - Deon!