1 00:00:01,835 --> 00:00:04,072 [siren wailing] 2 00:00:04,105 --> 00:00:05,473 - COMING THROUGH, PEOPLE, COMING THROUGH. 3 00:00:05,506 --> 00:00:06,374 - WHAT'S GOING ON? WHAT'S GOING ON? 4 00:00:06,407 --> 00:00:07,708 WHAT DO WE GOT? 5 00:00:07,741 --> 00:00:09,143 - HE WAS HALFWAY THROUGH A RIB EYE 6 00:00:09,177 --> 00:00:10,044 WHEN HE GRABBED HIS CHEST AND WENT DOWN. 7 00:00:10,078 --> 00:00:11,312 HE'S NOT BREATHING. 8 00:00:11,345 --> 00:00:12,646 - ALL RIGHT. 9 00:00:12,680 --> 00:00:14,582 HERE YOU GO. 10 00:00:16,550 --> 00:00:18,052 [click, bleep] 11 00:00:18,086 --> 00:00:20,354 IS THIS, UH... - YEAH, I THINK SO. 12 00:00:20,388 --> 00:00:23,657 - OKAY. 13 00:00:23,691 --> 00:00:26,427 - HOW YOU DOIN' HERE? - FIRING UP THE DEFIB. 14 00:00:26,460 --> 00:00:27,528 CLEAR. 15 00:00:27,561 --> 00:00:29,097 [power up whine] [thump] 16 00:00:29,130 --> 00:00:30,798 NOTHING. 17 00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:34,202 CLEAR. 18 00:00:34,235 --> 00:00:35,436 [whine, thump] 19 00:00:35,469 --> 00:00:38,072 [beeping] THERE HE IS. 20 00:00:38,106 --> 00:00:39,773 - OH, THANK GOD. - RIGHT? 21 00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:45,579 - ONE, TWO, THREE. 22 00:00:45,613 --> 00:00:47,581 THERE WE GO. 23 00:00:47,615 --> 00:00:51,452 - THE SERVICE WAS LOVELY. MR. O'SHEA HAD A WONDERFUL TIME. 24 00:00:53,954 --> 00:00:56,090 - I KNEW IT WAS HIM. - WHO IS IT, A LOCAL CELEBRITY, 25 00:00:56,124 --> 00:00:57,425 SOME SPORTS GUY I DON'T KNOW ABOUT? 26 00:00:57,458 --> 00:00:58,926 IS THIS DITKA? 27 00:00:58,959 --> 00:01:00,861 - DO YOU SEE A HALO? IT'S JIMMY O. 28 00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:02,730 - OH, THE GUY FROM THE MATTRESS STORE COMMERCIALS. 29 00:01:02,763 --> 00:01:05,699 NO, THAT'S JIMMY C. THE C IS FOR CRAZY SAVINGS. 30 00:01:05,733 --> 00:01:07,801 - NO, JIMMY O'SHEA, OLD-SCHOOL IRISH MOBSTER. 31 00:01:07,835 --> 00:01:09,270 - LIKE WHITEY BULGER, BUT LESS SUCCESSFUL. 32 00:01:09,303 --> 00:01:11,372 - YEAH, AND LESS IN JAIL. - WOW. 33 00:01:11,405 --> 00:01:13,141 IF I WERE A MOBSTER, I'D NEVER GO TO RESTAURANTS 34 00:01:13,174 --> 00:01:15,109 'CAUSE THAT'S WHERE ALL THE HITS HAPPEN. 35 00:01:15,143 --> 00:01:16,710 - IF YOU WERE A MOBSTER, YOU'D DIE YOUR FIRST DAY OF WORK. 36 00:01:16,744 --> 00:01:18,546 - NO, I WOULDN'T, 'CAUSE I'D ORDER IN. 37 00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:20,047 - YOU SHOULD TEACH MOBSTER SCHOOL, BRIAN. 38 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:22,150 YOU'VE GOT A LOT OF GOOD IDEAS. - HEY, HOLD UP. 39 00:01:22,183 --> 00:01:24,218 - OH, I'M SORRY, SIR. YOU CAN'T RIDE WITH US. 40 00:01:24,252 --> 00:01:25,586 BUT YOU CAN FOLLOW US TO CITY HOSPITAL. 41 00:01:25,619 --> 00:01:27,721 - I GO WHERE MR. O'SHEA GOES. 42 00:01:27,755 --> 00:01:28,889 COME HERE. 43 00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:29,990 WATCH MY CAR. 44 00:01:30,023 --> 00:01:30,958 - I'M JUST ABOUT TO GET OFF. 45 00:01:30,991 --> 00:01:33,127 - NO, YOU'RE NOT. 46 00:01:33,161 --> 00:01:36,096 [hip-hop music] 47 00:01:36,130 --> 00:01:39,099 * 48 00:01:39,133 --> 00:01:40,234 [siren wailing] 49 00:01:40,268 --> 00:01:41,669 - TAKE MADISON. 50 00:01:41,702 --> 00:01:42,770 - OH, WE'LL GET HIM THERE, SIR. 51 00:01:42,803 --> 00:01:44,505 - MADISON IS FASTEST. 52 00:01:44,538 --> 00:01:46,240 - WELL, WE GOT THE SIREN, SO WE'RE GOOD TO GO. 53 00:01:46,274 --> 00:01:48,509 - YOU'RE GONNA TAKE MADISON. 54 00:01:48,542 --> 00:01:50,344 - YEAH, MADISON ALL THE WAY. 55 00:01:50,378 --> 00:01:52,513 - [muttering] - WHAT'S THAT, BOSS? 56 00:01:52,546 --> 00:01:54,014 - HE SAID SHUT THE HELL UP, FAT EDDIE. 57 00:01:54,047 --> 00:01:55,183 CAN I HAVE SOME OXYGEN PLEASE, HANK? 58 00:01:55,216 --> 00:01:57,751 - SURE. - DOES MR. O'SHEA 59 00:01:57,785 --> 00:02:00,020 HAVE YOU CONFUSED WITH PERHAPS A HEAVIER EDDIE? 60 00:02:00,053 --> 00:02:02,290 IF ANYTHING, YOU SEEM LIKE A SKINNY EDDIE. 61 00:02:02,323 --> 00:02:04,825 I ONLY ASK SO WE CAN DETERMINE HOW HIS BRAIN IS FUNCTIONING. 62 00:02:04,858 --> 00:02:05,993 - NO, I'M FAT EDDIE. 63 00:02:06,026 --> 00:02:07,761 I USED TO BE OBESE. 64 00:02:07,795 --> 00:02:09,463 BUT THEN I CHANGED MY LIFESTYLE 65 00:02:09,497 --> 00:02:10,964 BECAUSE I COULD SEE THIS IS WHERE I WAS HEADED. 66 00:02:10,998 --> 00:02:12,700 - [muttering] 67 00:02:12,733 --> 00:02:16,003 - WHAT, BOSS? - [mutters] 68 00:02:16,036 --> 00:02:17,305 - TELL THE MAN. 69 00:02:17,338 --> 00:02:18,672 - PUSSY. 70 00:02:18,706 --> 00:02:20,508 HE CALLED YOU A PUSSY. 71 00:02:20,541 --> 00:02:22,176 - 25 YEARS I'VE BEEN TELLING HIM TO CUT BACK ON THE MEAT, 72 00:02:22,210 --> 00:02:23,611 BUT HE WON'T. 73 00:02:23,644 --> 00:02:25,779 YOU KNOW WHY HE EATS AT THAT PLACE? 74 00:02:25,813 --> 00:02:28,949 'CAUSE THEY PUT A BIG SLAB OF BUTTER ON THE STEAK. 75 00:02:28,982 --> 00:02:30,150 I TOLD HIM THIS WAS GONNA HAPPEN, 76 00:02:30,184 --> 00:02:34,488 BUT DOES HE LISTEN TO ME? 77 00:02:34,522 --> 00:02:36,624 - OH, I THOUGHT THAT WAS A RHETORICAL QUESTION. 78 00:02:36,657 --> 00:02:38,459 UM...NO? 79 00:02:38,492 --> 00:02:40,228 - CORRECT. NO. 80 00:02:40,261 --> 00:02:42,029 EVEN WHEN I LOST ALL THAT WEIGHT 81 00:02:42,062 --> 00:02:46,234 WORKING MY BALLS OFF ON THAT GODDAMNED ELLIPTICAL. 82 00:02:46,267 --> 00:02:48,202 - THAT'S A GIRL'S MACHINE. 83 00:02:48,236 --> 00:02:50,638 - HE SAID THAT THAT'S ACTUALLY-- - I KNOW WHAT HE SAID. 84 00:02:50,671 --> 00:02:54,308 YEAH, I-I CHOOSE NOT TO HEAR WHEN HE GETS LIKE THIS. 85 00:02:54,342 --> 00:02:56,043 - HOW WE DOING UP THERE, JOHNNY? 86 00:02:56,076 --> 00:02:58,546 [siren wailing] 87 00:02:59,947 --> 00:03:01,682 - JIMMY O, HUH? - HUH? 88 00:03:01,715 --> 00:03:03,183 - THAT GUY IS NO JOKE. 89 00:03:03,217 --> 00:03:04,918 I HEARD HE ONCE CUT OFF A WAITER'S FINGER 90 00:03:04,952 --> 00:03:07,020 FOR PUTTING THE SPOON NEXT TO THE FORK. 91 00:03:07,054 --> 00:03:08,322 THEY GO ON OPPOSITE SIDES OF THE PLATE. 92 00:03:08,356 --> 00:03:10,224 REMEMBER THAT. 93 00:03:10,258 --> 00:03:11,559 - YOU SURE HE WASN'T TRYING TO EAT THE GUY'S FINGERS? 94 00:03:11,592 --> 00:03:13,160 - [laughing] 95 00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:15,195 - HOMEBOY IS HUGE, BUTTER-ON-STEAK STYLE. 96 00:03:15,229 --> 00:03:17,831 - THAT'S WILD--YOU GUYS HAD A MURDERER'S LIFE IN YOUR HANDS. 97 00:03:17,865 --> 00:03:19,267 - YEAH. - WE DID, INDEED. 98 00:03:19,300 --> 00:03:20,501 - IT'S A SHAME OUR JOBS PREVENT US 99 00:03:20,534 --> 00:03:21,869 FROM KILLING PEOPLE LIKE THAT. 100 00:03:21,902 --> 00:03:23,203 - YEAH, AND LAWS IN GENERAL. 101 00:03:23,237 --> 00:03:24,772 - YEAH, BUT YOU KNOW HOW LONG THE COPS 102 00:03:24,805 --> 00:03:26,407 HAVE BEEN TRYING TO TAKE THAT DUDE DOWN? 103 00:03:26,440 --> 00:03:28,041 WHAT'S THE POINT OF HAVING ALL THIS POWER 104 00:03:28,075 --> 00:03:30,177 IF WE CAN'T USE IT? - IT'S THE OATH WE TAKE. 105 00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:32,780 WE DO OUR BEST TO SAVE WHOEVER'S PUT IN FRONT OF US 106 00:03:32,813 --> 00:03:34,114 WHETHER THEY'RE GOOD OR EVIL. 107 00:03:34,147 --> 00:03:35,849 DOPE DEALERS, GANG BANGERS, 108 00:03:35,883 --> 00:03:38,452 DICTATORS--DOESN'T MATTER, YOU SAVE THEM. 109 00:03:38,486 --> 00:03:40,354 - AND BESIDES, JIMMY O ISN'T ALL BAD. 110 00:03:40,388 --> 00:03:42,256 - ARE YOU KIDDING ME? - I'M NOT SAYING THE GUY'S 111 00:03:42,290 --> 00:03:44,358 A SAINT, BUT HE DID KEEP A KIND OF PEACE IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD, 112 00:03:44,392 --> 00:03:45,793 AND HE PAID FOR ALL KINDS OF COOL SH-- 113 00:03:45,826 --> 00:03:47,227 LIKE A CARNIVAL EVERY YEAR. 114 00:03:47,261 --> 00:03:48,796 HE BUILT US A LITTLE LEAGUE FIELD, 115 00:03:48,829 --> 00:03:50,564 LIKE, THE BEST LITTLE LEAGUE FIELD IN THE CITY. 116 00:03:50,598 --> 00:03:53,066 IT HAD THESE COOL DUGOUTS JUST LIKE A BIG LEAGUE STADIUM. 117 00:03:53,100 --> 00:03:54,935 - HE BOUGHT IT WITH BLOOD MONEY, JOHN. 118 00:03:54,968 --> 00:03:56,370 - I DON'T CARE, HANK. 119 00:03:56,404 --> 00:03:59,072 DUGOUTS. BELOW THE GROUND DUGOUTS. 120 00:03:59,106 --> 00:04:01,275 - SO WHO'S THE WORST PERSON THAT EVERYONE HERE HAS SAVED? 121 00:04:01,309 --> 00:04:03,143 - YOUR MOM. 122 00:04:03,176 --> 00:04:05,145 OH, MY GOD. OH, I DIDN'T EVEN-- 123 00:04:05,178 --> 00:04:06,814 I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE THAT CAME FROM. 124 00:04:06,847 --> 00:04:08,882 - THAT WAS REALLY GOOD. 125 00:04:08,916 --> 00:04:13,253 - HANK, WORST PERSON YOU'VE SAVED. 126 00:04:13,287 --> 00:04:15,456 - AARON RODGERS. - BULLSH--. 127 00:04:15,489 --> 00:04:17,291 - WHO'S-- - PACKERS QUARTERBACK. 128 00:04:17,325 --> 00:04:19,793 - I NEVER TOLD YOU ABOUT IT BECAUSE I WAS TOO ASHAMED. 129 00:04:19,827 --> 00:04:22,396 - YOU NEVER TOLD ME ABOUT IT 'CAUSE IT NEVER HAPPENED. 130 00:04:22,430 --> 00:04:24,898 - REMEMBER WHEN I WAS EARNING EXTRA CASH AS A SET MEDIC? 131 00:04:24,932 --> 00:04:26,500 - YEAH. - I WORKED ON A COMMERCIAL 132 00:04:26,534 --> 00:04:28,836 FOR SOME LAME POTATO CHIP COMPANY, 133 00:04:28,869 --> 00:04:30,338 AND AARON RODGERS WAS IN IT. 134 00:04:30,371 --> 00:04:32,239 - OH, OF COURSE HE WAS. DICK. 135 00:04:32,272 --> 00:04:33,741 - YEAH. ANYWAY, IN THE COMMERCIAL, 136 00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:35,843 HE HAD TO CATCH A PASS FROM A LITTLE KID. 137 00:04:35,876 --> 00:04:38,178 - I LOVE THAT COMMERCIAL. THAT KID'S SO CUTE. 138 00:04:38,211 --> 00:04:40,013 READ HE WAS A PROBLEM ON SET, THOUGH. 139 00:04:40,047 --> 00:04:41,281 - WHERE WOULD YOU READ SOMETHING LIKE THAT? 140 00:04:41,315 --> 00:04:43,817 - MM-HMM, LITTLE SH-- HAD AN ARM. 141 00:04:43,851 --> 00:04:45,653 AND ON THE FIRST TAKE, RODGERS WASN'T PREPARED FOR IT. 142 00:04:45,686 --> 00:04:47,321 CAUGHT THE BALL WRONG. 143 00:04:47,355 --> 00:04:51,492 DISLOCATED HIS MIDDLE FINGER ON HIS RIGHT HAND. 144 00:04:51,525 --> 00:04:53,494 - HIS THROWING HAND? - YEAH. 145 00:04:53,527 --> 00:04:55,763 AND IF I HADN'T POPPED IT BACK IN RIGHT THEN AND THERE, 146 00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:57,865 HE WOULD HAVE MISSED THE NFC TITLE GAME 147 00:04:57,898 --> 00:04:59,433 WHEN THEY BEAT US TO GO TO THE SUPER BOWL. 148 00:04:59,467 --> 00:05:00,701 - 2010. 149 00:05:00,734 --> 00:05:02,670 HOLY SH--. YOU SON OF A BITCH. 150 00:05:02,703 --> 00:05:05,473 THAT LITTLE KID ACTOR WOULD HAVE BEEN A GODDAMN AMERICAN HERO, 151 00:05:05,506 --> 00:05:07,140 AND YOU--YOU RUINED IT. 152 00:05:07,174 --> 00:05:08,842 I CAN'T EVEN LOOK AT YOU RIGHT NOW. 153 00:05:08,876 --> 00:05:10,711 - JOHN, YOU JUST SAVED A MAN 154 00:05:10,744 --> 00:05:12,846 WHO MOST CERTAINLY HAS BLOOD ON HIS HANDS. 155 00:05:12,880 --> 00:05:14,181 - THAT HAS NEVER BEEN PROVEN, 156 00:05:14,214 --> 00:05:15,282 BUT YOU KNOW WHAT HAS BEEN PROVEN? 157 00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:17,017 YOU, HENRY ISAIAH ST. CLARE-- 158 00:05:17,050 --> 00:05:17,985 - ISAIAH'S YOUR MIDDLE NAME? 159 00:05:18,018 --> 00:05:19,319 SO REGAL. - BRIAN. 160 00:05:19,353 --> 00:05:22,690 YOU...COST THE BEARS THE SUPER BOWL. 161 00:05:22,723 --> 00:05:24,492 - THANK YOU, BRIAN. 162 00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:26,326 CUTLER'S KNEE COST THE BEARS THE SUPER BOWL, 163 00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:28,396 AND JIMMY O MOST CERTAINLY 164 00:05:28,429 --> 00:05:30,631 HAS BLOOD ON HIS HANDS, HIS ARMS, HIS-- 165 00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:31,799 - YOU DON'T GET TO WEAR BEARS GEAR ANYMORE. 166 00:05:31,832 --> 00:05:33,501 - IT HAS BEEN FOUR YEARS, JOHN. 167 00:05:33,534 --> 00:05:35,536 - YOU DON'T GET TO WEAR BEARS GEAR FOR FOUR YEARS. 168 00:05:35,569 --> 00:05:37,705 - UH, YOU DON'T GET TO TELL ME WHAT I GET TO WEAR. 169 00:05:37,738 --> 00:05:40,974 AND ANOTHER THING, HE WAS NICE. - YOU TAKE THAT BACK. 170 00:05:41,008 --> 00:05:42,743 - ELLEN DEGENERES NICE. - TAKE IT BACK! 171 00:05:42,776 --> 00:05:44,545 - NICE, NICE, NICE. - OH. 172 00:05:44,578 --> 00:05:47,415 - CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT THOSE GUYS SAVED JIMMY O TODAY? 173 00:05:47,448 --> 00:05:48,916 SEE, THAT'S WHY I WANT TO JOIN THE FBI, 174 00:05:48,949 --> 00:05:50,651 SO I CAN TAKE SCUMBAGS LIKE THAT DOWN. 175 00:05:50,684 --> 00:05:51,752 - AW, COME ON. 176 00:05:51,785 --> 00:05:53,086 JIMMY O'S ALL RIGHT, T. 177 00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:54,187 HE GAVE THE KIDS IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD 178 00:05:54,221 --> 00:05:55,389 A HORSE ONE TIME. 179 00:05:55,423 --> 00:05:57,057 WAIT, NOT A HORSE. 180 00:05:57,090 --> 00:05:58,492 WHAT'S THE THING THAT'S A HORSE, 181 00:05:58,526 --> 00:06:01,829 BUT, LIKE, A SMALLER HORSE? - A PONY? 182 00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:04,498 - YEAH, A PONY. - I GUESS THAT'S NICE. 183 00:06:04,532 --> 00:06:06,333 - YEAH, THAT PONY WAS AN ASSHOLE, THOUGH. 184 00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:07,568 HE WOULDN'T LET ANYBODY RIDE IT. 185 00:06:07,601 --> 00:06:09,169 I TRIED, LIKE, 100 TIMES. 186 00:06:09,202 --> 00:06:12,339 I GAVE HIM SUGAR CUBES AND CARROTS AND HAY. 187 00:06:12,372 --> 00:06:13,674 I MUST HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING, 188 00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:15,609 BUT THAT PONY WAS LIKE, "HELL NO, SON. 189 00:06:15,643 --> 00:06:17,678 YOU AIN'T GETTING NO RIDES." 190 00:06:17,711 --> 00:06:19,447 THAT PONY WAS A STRAIGHT UP DICK. 191 00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:21,381 I MISS HIM EVERY DAY. 192 00:06:21,415 --> 00:06:23,551 - HEY, WELL, MAYBE ONE DAY YOU'LL MEET AGAIN. 193 00:06:23,584 --> 00:06:25,018 - MM-HMM. 194 00:06:25,052 --> 00:06:26,954 - WHAT WAS THE PONY'S NAME? - TONY. 195 00:06:26,987 --> 00:06:30,491 - HA-HA. TONY THE PONY. - NAH, JUST TONY. 196 00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:38,966 - HEY, 14? 197 00:06:38,999 --> 00:06:41,969 SOME GUY NAMED EDDIE JUST CALLED. 198 00:06:42,002 --> 00:06:43,737 - WHAT'D HE WANT? - SAID HE NEEDS YOU GUYS 199 00:06:43,771 --> 00:06:45,105 TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL. 200 00:06:45,138 --> 00:06:46,740 HIS FRIEND JIMMY WANTS TO TALK TO YOU? 201 00:06:46,774 --> 00:06:50,143 - OH, SH--. - HE SOUNDED CRYPTIC AND CUTE. 202 00:06:50,177 --> 00:06:51,879 WAS HE CUTE? - HE WAS OKAY. 203 00:06:51,912 --> 00:06:54,147 KIND EYES, LOST A LOT OF WEIGHT RECENTLY. 204 00:06:54,181 --> 00:06:56,316 I'D SAY GO FOR IT. - NO, DON'T GO FOR IT. 205 00:06:56,349 --> 00:06:58,819 HE IS A CRIMINAL. - DANGEROUS AND CUTE? 206 00:06:58,852 --> 00:07:00,754 NOW YOU'RE JUST SWEETENING THE POT. 207 00:07:04,191 --> 00:07:05,759 - YO. 208 00:07:05,793 --> 00:07:06,794 WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 209 00:07:06,827 --> 00:07:08,261 - HANK CALLED US FOR BACKUP. 210 00:07:08,295 --> 00:07:09,897 - YOU CALLED MY GIRLFRIEND FOR PROTECTION? 211 00:07:09,930 --> 00:07:11,932 - YES, I DID, BECAUSE YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS A COP, 212 00:07:11,965 --> 00:07:13,100 AND THOSE GUYS ARE MURDERERS. 213 00:07:13,133 --> 00:07:14,668 - THEY'RE ALLEGED MURDERERS. 214 00:07:14,702 --> 00:07:15,903 - HEY, ME AND ALL THE KIDS IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD 215 00:07:15,936 --> 00:07:17,771 WORSHIPPED JIMMY O. HE WAS THE MAN. 216 00:07:17,805 --> 00:07:19,740 - YEAH? DID HE BUILD YOU GUYS A LITTLE LEAGUE FIELD, TOO? 217 00:07:19,773 --> 00:07:21,408 - NO, BUT HE GAVE US A JERK PONY. 218 00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:23,644 - MM. ALL RIGHT, YOU GO IN FIRST. 219 00:07:23,677 --> 00:07:25,245 YOU GOT THE LOOK. - WHAT LOOK? 220 00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:28,281 - TALL, JACKED, INTIMIDATING. - BLACK? 221 00:07:28,315 --> 00:07:29,817 - I--IT DOESN'T HURT. 222 00:07:29,850 --> 00:07:30,851 - HE DIDN'T BUILD ME A DUGOUT. 223 00:07:30,884 --> 00:07:32,352 YOU LEAD. - I CAN'T. 224 00:07:32,385 --> 00:07:34,121 ALL RIGHT, LET'S ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS. 225 00:07:34,154 --> 00:07:35,956 YEAH? - YEAH. 226 00:07:35,989 --> 00:07:39,026 I MEAN, THAT WORKS, TOO. 227 00:07:39,059 --> 00:07:40,327 I THINK IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN HIM, ANYWAY. 228 00:07:40,360 --> 00:07:42,630 - YEAH, BRIAN, THANKS. 229 00:07:42,663 --> 00:07:43,997 - MR. O'SHEA? 230 00:07:44,031 --> 00:07:47,000 YOU WANTED TO SEE US? 231 00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:55,809 - I-I WANT TO THANK YOU THREE FOR SAVING MY LIFE. 232 00:07:55,843 --> 00:07:58,478 I OWE YOU. WHAT DO YOU WANT? 233 00:07:58,512 --> 00:08:00,548 - WE--WE DIDN'T EXPECT A GIFT, BUT-- 234 00:08:00,581 --> 00:08:02,315 - BUT I MEAN, IF YOU--SINCE YOU OFFERED. 235 00:08:02,349 --> 00:08:03,884 - WHAT DO WE WANT? 236 00:08:03,917 --> 00:08:05,686 WE WANT YOU TO MAKE SOME CHANGES. 237 00:08:05,719 --> 00:08:07,487 - BRIAN? - MR. O'SHEA, 238 00:08:07,521 --> 00:08:09,690 I WILL SAVE YOUR LIFE, BUT I WILL NOT HOLD MY TONGUE. 239 00:08:09,723 --> 00:08:11,659 - WHAT BRIAN'S TRYING TO SAY IS-- 240 00:08:11,692 --> 00:08:13,360 - AND I WOULD BE REMISS IF I DIDN'T TAKE THIS OPPORTUNITY 241 00:08:13,393 --> 00:08:14,828 TO GIVE YOU SOME HARD TRUTHS. 242 00:08:14,862 --> 00:08:16,229 - WHAT KIND OF HARD TRUTHS? 243 00:08:16,263 --> 00:08:18,666 - YOUR DIET IS HORRENDOUS. 244 00:08:18,699 --> 00:08:21,201 THAT STEAK AND LINGUINE IS A ONE-WAY TICKET OUT OF HERE, 245 00:08:21,234 --> 00:08:23,571 MISTER, IN A BODY BAG. 246 00:08:23,604 --> 00:08:25,205 - THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TELLING HIM. 247 00:08:25,238 --> 00:08:30,077 ALL THAT FRICKING FAT AND GLUTEN, IT'S POISON. 248 00:08:30,110 --> 00:08:31,511 - I THOUGHT YOU WERE ABOUT TO LECTURE ME 249 00:08:31,545 --> 00:08:33,513 ABOUT MY BUSINESS ACTIVITIES. 250 00:08:33,547 --> 00:08:36,684 - OH, NO. - NEVER, DUGOUTS. 251 00:08:36,717 --> 00:08:38,819 - LOOK, I STRESS EAT. 252 00:08:38,852 --> 00:08:40,721 - WE ALL DO. - FOR ME, IT'S DONUTS. 253 00:08:40,754 --> 00:08:42,355 - BUSINESS IS BAD LATELY. 254 00:08:42,389 --> 00:08:44,491 WE GOT HIT REALLY HARD WITH THE RECESSION. 255 00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:46,560 THE NUMBERS BUSINESS IS PRACTICALLY DEAD. 256 00:08:46,594 --> 00:08:48,528 IT'S ALL SCRATCH CARDS, NOW. 257 00:08:48,562 --> 00:08:51,098 THERE'S NO UNIONS ANYMORE, JUST WALMART 258 00:08:51,131 --> 00:08:55,836 AND THE FREAKING CHINESE. 259 00:08:55,869 --> 00:08:57,337 YOU KNOW WHAT BUSINESS WE SHOULD HAVE STAYED IN? 260 00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:59,006 SPEAKEASIES. 261 00:08:59,039 --> 00:09:01,541 MY DAUGHTER TOOK ME TO ONE IN WICKER PARK. 262 00:09:01,575 --> 00:09:05,012 SOME ASSHOLE IN SUSPENDERS AND A SMALL HAT CHARGED ME $15 263 00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:06,680 FOR A WHISKEY SODA. 264 00:09:06,714 --> 00:09:09,049 - OH, THAT DUMP ON DAMEN. - OH, I HATE THAT JOINT. 265 00:09:09,082 --> 00:09:13,186 - MR. O'SHEA, IF I MAY, YOU'RE IN A CYCLE. 266 00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:15,723 YOU'RE UNDER A LOT OF STRESS, SO YOU EAT POORLY, 267 00:09:15,756 --> 00:09:18,592 AND THAT MAKES YOU SAD, WHICH STRESSES YOU OUT MORE, 268 00:09:18,626 --> 00:09:19,960 AND SO YOU EAT MORE JUNK, 269 00:09:19,993 --> 00:09:22,295 AND THAT MAKES YOU MORE STRESSED AND SAD, 270 00:09:22,329 --> 00:09:24,932 AND I THINK YOU SEE WHERE I'M GOING WITH THIS. 271 00:09:24,965 --> 00:09:27,467 IT FEEDS ON ITSELF. INTENTIONAL PUN. 272 00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:28,368 - WE SHOULD LET YOU GET SOME REST. 273 00:09:28,401 --> 00:09:30,437 - YEAH. 274 00:09:30,470 --> 00:09:32,239 - ALL I'M SAYING IS PUT DOWN THE MEAT, PICK UP THE VEGGIES. 275 00:09:32,272 --> 00:09:33,607 PUT SOME COLOR ON THAT PLATE. 276 00:09:33,641 --> 00:09:36,143 - YES. EAT FROM THE RAINBOW, JIMMY. 277 00:09:36,176 --> 00:09:37,444 - YOU KNOW WHAT'S AT THE END OF THAT RAINBOW? 278 00:09:37,477 --> 00:09:39,647 HEALTH. AND WHO KNOWS? 279 00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:41,548 YOU MAY START FEELING A LITTLE BIT BETTER ABOUT YOURSELF, 280 00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:44,484 STOP DOING THE MURDERY STUFF. 281 00:09:44,517 --> 00:09:47,287 - ALLEGED. - I NEVER SPENT A NIGHT IN JAIL. 282 00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:50,590 - MR. O'SHEA, YOU'VE BEEN GIVEN A SECOND CHANCE, 283 00:09:50,624 --> 00:09:52,993 AN OPPORTUNITY TO DO THINGS A LITTLE DIFFERENTLY. 284 00:09:53,026 --> 00:09:55,462 BUT DON'T CHANGE FOR ME. 285 00:09:55,495 --> 00:09:58,766 CHANGE FOR YOU, FOR YOUR DAUGHTER, 286 00:09:58,799 --> 00:10:00,067 FOR FAT SKINNY EDDIE. 287 00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:01,669 YOU GOT A FRIEND AND A COWORKER 288 00:10:01,702 --> 00:10:03,436 WHO CARES AN AWFUL LOT ABOUT YOU, 289 00:10:03,470 --> 00:10:06,674 AND THAT MAKES YOU ONE FREAKING LUCKY GUY. 290 00:10:06,707 --> 00:10:09,109 - I APPRECIATE YOUR HONESTY, KID, 291 00:10:09,142 --> 00:10:11,411 AND I'LL TRY TO MAKE SOME CHANGES, 292 00:10:11,444 --> 00:10:13,180 IF ONLY SO YOU'LL STOP TALKING. 293 00:10:13,213 --> 00:10:15,983 - OKAY. [uncomfortable laughter] 294 00:10:16,016 --> 00:10:17,818 - THANK YOU, MR. O'SHEA. - THANK YOU. 295 00:10:17,851 --> 00:10:19,319 - THANK YOU. - MM-HMM. 296 00:10:19,352 --> 00:10:21,221 THANKS SO MUCH. 297 00:10:24,224 --> 00:10:27,661 - HEY, MR. O, ON BEHALF OF ALL THE KIDS ON 26th STREET, 298 00:10:27,695 --> 00:10:31,164 THANK YOU FOR THE PONY. 299 00:10:31,198 --> 00:10:32,933 OH, WHAT'S UP, MAN? YOU LOSE SOME WEIGHT, BRO? 300 00:10:32,966 --> 00:10:34,467 - 96 POUNDS. 301 00:10:34,501 --> 00:10:36,804 - YEAH, YOU DID. 302 00:10:36,837 --> 00:10:39,539 YEAH, YOU DID, MAN. 303 00:10:43,977 --> 00:10:45,779 - YES, WE SAVED JIMMY O'S LIFE, 304 00:10:45,813 --> 00:10:48,015 BUT DO YOU KNOW WHO THE REAL HERO IS? 305 00:10:48,048 --> 00:10:49,817 NO. [laughs] 306 00:10:49,850 --> 00:10:51,719 NO, NO, IT'S NOT ME. 307 00:10:51,752 --> 00:10:54,321 FAT SKINNY EDDIE IS THE REAL HERO. 308 00:10:54,354 --> 00:10:56,990 I MEAN, IT'S EASY FOR ME TO WALK IN THERE WITH THE FULL WEIGHT 309 00:10:57,024 --> 00:10:58,792 OF MY EXPERTISE AND SAY, 310 00:10:58,826 --> 00:11:01,661 "CHANGE THIS, CHANGE THAT." BUT EDDIE'S THE ONE 311 00:11:01,695 --> 00:11:04,798 WHO'S GOT TO BE THERE EVERY DAY MAKING SURE THE CHANGE STICKS, 312 00:11:04,832 --> 00:11:06,633 AND THAT'S THE ONLY WAY IT'S GONNA WORK, 'CAUSE 313 00:11:06,666 --> 00:11:09,903 THE TRUTH IS IT'S YOUR COWORKERS WHO KNOW YOU BEST. 314 00:11:09,937 --> 00:11:11,805 - WELL, TAKE THIS FROM YOUR COWORKER. 315 00:11:11,839 --> 00:11:14,174 WHEN YOU GET ON YOUR HIGH HORSE, YOU'RE AN ASS. 316 00:11:14,207 --> 00:11:16,476 - I WAS GONNA SAY EXACTLY THE SAME THING, EXCEPT DICK, 317 00:11:16,509 --> 00:11:18,011 BUT I LIKE WHAT YOU DID WITH THE ASS BIT 'CAUSE 318 00:11:18,045 --> 00:11:19,312 IT'S A PLAY BACK ON THE HORSE. - THANK YOU. 319 00:11:19,346 --> 00:11:21,214 - OKAY, OKAY, 320 00:11:21,248 --> 00:11:23,583 I'LL TAKE YOUR CRITICISM TO HEART BECAUSE IT'S THE PEOPLE 321 00:11:23,616 --> 00:11:26,186 YOU WORK WITH WHO REALLY DO KNOW YOU BEST. 322 00:11:26,219 --> 00:11:28,188 I THINK WE'VE ALL IDENTIFIED CERTAIN AREAS 323 00:11:28,221 --> 00:11:30,490 IN ONE ANOTHER THAT NEED IMPROVING, SO I'LL GO FIRST. 324 00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:32,592 - NO, NO, NO, NO. - NOPE, NOPE, NOPE. 325 00:11:32,625 --> 00:11:34,227 - WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT WHAT WE'D CHANGE ABOUT EACH OTHER. 326 00:11:34,261 --> 00:11:35,996 I TRIED THAT WITH THERESA ONCE. IT DID NOT GO WELL. 327 00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:38,832 - STRANGE, I HEARD IRISH COPS TAKE CRITICISM VERY WELL. 328 00:11:38,866 --> 00:11:40,667 - YOU KNOW, WEIRDLY, I'VE HEARD THE OPPOSITE. 329 00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,402 - BRIAN, LISTEN. 330 00:11:42,435 --> 00:11:44,604 PEOPLE HAVE BEEN TRYING TO CHANGE ME MY ENTIRE LIFE, 331 00:11:44,637 --> 00:11:46,606 AND TRUST ME, IT'S INCREDIBLY ANNOYING. 332 00:11:46,639 --> 00:11:48,508 - LOOK, I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT BIG CHANGES, HERE, 333 00:11:48,541 --> 00:11:51,611 FELLAS, JUST LITTLE, SMALL, MINI ONES, TWEAKS. 334 00:11:51,644 --> 00:11:54,915 FOR EXAMPLE, SOMETIMES I THINK THAT 335 00:11:54,948 --> 00:11:56,616 I LOOK UP TO YOU GUYS TOO MUCH, AND THAT'S A LOT OF PRESSURE. 336 00:11:56,649 --> 00:11:58,251 I SHOULD PROBABLY DIAL THAT DOWN. 337 00:11:58,285 --> 00:11:59,386 - NOT NECESSARILY. - NO, I THINK YOU'RE GOOD. 338 00:11:59,419 --> 00:12:01,221 - AND HANK-- 339 00:12:01,254 --> 00:12:02,522 - NO, YOU DON'T NEED TO GO AROUND THE HORN, BRI. 340 00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:04,224 WE'RE NOT PLAYING. - NO, NO, JOHN. 341 00:12:04,257 --> 00:12:06,226 I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR WHAT BRIAN WOULD CHANGE ABOUT ME. 342 00:12:06,259 --> 00:12:08,061 - THANK YOU, HANK. 343 00:12:08,095 --> 00:12:09,696 - HMM? - HMM. 344 00:12:09,729 --> 00:12:13,466 SOMETIMES WHEN YOU ASK FOR THINGS IN THE RIG, 345 00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:15,735 YOUR TONE CAN BE A LITTLE AGGRESSIVE. 346 00:12:15,769 --> 00:12:17,270 - THAT'S BECAUSE I NEED THINGS AGGRESSIVELY. 347 00:12:17,304 --> 00:12:18,872 - IT'S NOT EVERY WORD, 348 00:12:18,906 --> 00:12:21,374 MOSTLY THE WAY YOU SAY "GAUZE." - OH, TOTALLY. 349 00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:23,243 - YOU BARK IT OUT, RIGHT? - WELL THEN, 350 00:12:23,276 --> 00:12:25,412 SH--HEADS, HOW WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO SAY THE WORD "GAUZE?" 351 00:12:25,445 --> 00:12:26,546 - WITH SOFTER CONSONANTS, 352 00:12:26,579 --> 00:12:28,448 LIKE GAUZE. 353 00:12:28,481 --> 00:12:30,050 - GAUZE. - NO, LIKE THIS. 354 00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:31,551 GAUZE. 355 00:12:31,584 --> 00:12:32,585 - GAUZE. 356 00:12:32,619 --> 00:12:34,287 - GAUZE. - G-GAUZE? 357 00:12:34,321 --> 00:12:35,488 both: GAUZE. - G-GAU-- 358 00:12:35,522 --> 00:12:36,824 - NO, LIKE THIS. - NO. 359 00:12:36,857 --> 00:12:38,125 - WATCH THIS. - WATCH HIM. 360 00:12:38,158 --> 00:12:39,392 - GAUZE. - YEAH, HE'S DOING IT. 361 00:12:39,426 --> 00:12:40,293 - GAUZE. - IT'S JUST, LIKE, GAUZE. 362 00:12:40,327 --> 00:12:41,461 - GAUZE. - GAUZE. 363 00:12:41,494 --> 00:12:42,462 - GAUZE. - GAUZE? 364 00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:43,630 - NO, NO. SHH. 365 00:12:43,663 --> 00:12:45,465 - WATCH. WATCH MY MOUTH, GAUZE. 366 00:12:45,498 --> 00:12:46,733 - GAUZE. - GAUZE. 367 00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:47,767 - GAUZE. 368 00:12:47,801 --> 00:12:48,969 - GAUZE. - GAUZE. 369 00:12:49,002 --> 00:12:50,070 - YOU'RE A LITTLE CLOSE. - GAUZE? 370 00:12:50,103 --> 00:12:51,304 - GAUZE. - GAUZE. 371 00:12:51,338 --> 00:12:52,272 both: GAUZE. 372 00:12:52,305 --> 00:12:53,673 - GAUZE. 373 00:12:53,706 --> 00:12:55,108 HEY, HOW ABOUT--HOW ABOUT SOME GAUZE? 374 00:12:55,142 --> 00:12:56,276 - HEY, GAUZE. - HEY, HAVE SOME GAUZE. 375 00:12:56,309 --> 00:12:57,310 - GAUZE! - GAUZE. 376 00:12:57,344 --> 00:12:58,411 - GAUZE. - GAUZE. 377 00:12:58,445 --> 00:12:59,412 - GAUZE? - GAUZE. 378 00:12:59,446 --> 00:13:00,347 - GAUZE. - GAUZE. 379 00:13:00,380 --> 00:13:01,414 - GAUZE. 380 00:13:01,448 --> 00:13:02,449 - GAUZE. - GAUZE. 381 00:13:02,482 --> 00:13:04,251 - GAUZE. - YOU KNOW WHAT? 382 00:13:04,284 --> 00:13:06,119 LISTEN, LISTEN, LISTEN. IF WE DOING THIS, JOHNNY, 383 00:13:06,153 --> 00:13:07,420 YOU COULD CLOSE THE BACK DOORS EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE. 384 00:13:07,454 --> 00:13:08,755 HOW ABOUT THAT? - OH, GOOD ONE, HANK. 385 00:13:08,788 --> 00:13:09,823 - WHAT? - MM-HMM. 386 00:13:09,857 --> 00:13:11,358 YEAH, WE LOAD A PATIENT IN. 387 00:13:11,391 --> 00:13:12,625 YOU RUN TO THE FRONT LIKE THE BACK 388 00:13:12,659 --> 00:13:14,294 IS AUTOMATICALLY OUR PROBLEM. 389 00:13:14,327 --> 00:13:16,529 YOU COULD CLOSE THE DOORS EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE. 390 00:13:16,563 --> 00:13:17,630 - BUT THAT WOULD KILL OUR SYSTEM. 391 00:13:17,664 --> 00:13:18,999 I DRIVE, YOU'RE IN BACK, 392 00:13:19,032 --> 00:13:20,968 BRIAN'S THE BAG MAN. - YEAH, EXACTLY. 393 00:13:21,001 --> 00:13:24,037 I ALWAYS CARRY THE BAGS, AND I SIT IN THIS TINY LITTLE SEAT, 394 00:13:24,071 --> 00:13:25,839 IT DOESN'T EVEN HAVE A REAL SEATBELT, 395 00:13:25,873 --> 00:13:27,774 AND ALL I'M ASKING FOR IS A LITTLE MORE CONSIDERATION 396 00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:29,676 AND A SLIGHTLY MORE PLEASANT TONE OF VOICE. 397 00:13:29,709 --> 00:13:31,344 - YOUR SEAT IS TINY. 398 00:13:31,378 --> 00:13:33,313 IT'S LIKE A LITTLE PERCH. 399 00:13:33,346 --> 00:13:36,016 LIKE BIG BIRD. 400 00:13:36,049 --> 00:13:37,617 BIG BIRD BRIAN. 401 00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:39,452 - I LIKE TO CALL IT THE BRIAN ZONE. 402 00:13:39,486 --> 00:13:41,788 BUT WHEN I THINK ABOUT IT, I'M LIKE, "SUNDAY, SUNDAY, 403 00:13:41,821 --> 00:13:44,958 SUNDAY, LIVE IN AMBULANCE 14, THE BRIAN ZONE." 404 00:13:44,992 --> 00:13:46,126 - THE BRIAN ZONE. 405 00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:49,629 [air guitaring] 406 00:13:49,662 --> 00:13:50,663 - WHOA. 407 00:13:50,697 --> 00:13:54,868 [all air guitaring] 408 00:13:54,902 --> 00:13:57,871 - WHOA, JEEZ, HEY, LOOK AT THAT. 409 00:13:57,905 --> 00:14:00,740 [all air drumming violently] 410 00:14:03,410 --> 00:14:05,578 LIKE PHIL COLLINS DOES. 411 00:14:07,380 --> 00:14:08,715 I LOVE THAT. 412 00:14:08,748 --> 00:14:10,583 I GOT TO SAY, THOUGH. - MM-HMM? 413 00:14:10,617 --> 00:14:11,351 - I'M FEELING A LITTLE BIT OF A GONG AT THE END OF IT. 414 00:14:11,384 --> 00:14:13,186 - NAH. 415 00:14:18,791 --> 00:14:20,827 - I CANNOT BELIEVE I MET JIMMY O. 416 00:14:20,860 --> 00:14:22,495 I'M STARSTRUCK, 417 00:14:22,529 --> 00:14:24,864 T, LIKE, A STAR CAME OUT OF THE SKY 418 00:14:24,898 --> 00:14:26,666 AND HIT ME IN THE FACE. 419 00:14:26,699 --> 00:14:28,902 THAT'S HOW I FEEL RIGHT NOW, MAN. 420 00:14:28,936 --> 00:14:31,371 - HE BOUGHT YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD A SMALL, STUPID HORSE. 421 00:14:31,404 --> 00:14:32,772 BIG DEAL. 422 00:14:32,805 --> 00:14:34,374 - T, HOW COULD YOU EVEN SAY THAT? 423 00:14:34,407 --> 00:14:35,675 HAVE YOU SEEN A HORSE? 424 00:14:35,708 --> 00:14:36,709 - YEAH. 425 00:14:36,743 --> 00:14:39,879 - THEY'RE SO MAJESTIC. 426 00:14:39,913 --> 00:14:42,182 I LOVE THEIR NEIGH. IT'S SO PROUD. 427 00:14:42,215 --> 00:14:45,218 PLUS, THEIR HOOVES MAKE JELL-O, WHICH IS DELICIOUS, 428 00:14:45,252 --> 00:14:47,454 AND GLUE, WHICH IS SUPER HELPFUL WHEN YOU'RE, 429 00:14:47,487 --> 00:14:49,789 LIKE, DOING A PROJECT. 430 00:14:49,822 --> 00:14:51,925 - YOU KNOW THE HORSES HAVE TO DIE TO MAKE ALL THOSE THINGS, 431 00:14:51,959 --> 00:14:54,761 BILLY. - AND THAT'S REALLY SAD. 432 00:14:54,794 --> 00:14:56,729 BUT WHAT A WAY TO GO. 433 00:14:56,763 --> 00:14:59,232 AND WHEN THEY LIVE, MAN, WHEN THEY LIVE? 434 00:14:59,266 --> 00:15:00,533 THEY'RE ALIVE. 435 00:15:00,567 --> 00:15:04,137 THE WIND BLOWS THROUGH THEIR MANES. 436 00:15:04,171 --> 00:15:06,106 I WISH I HAD A MANE. 437 00:15:09,342 --> 00:15:12,279 - SO HE SAID HE OWED YOU, AND HE ASKED YOU WHAT YOU WANTED, 438 00:15:12,312 --> 00:15:15,782 AND THE WORDS "POOL TABLE" NEVER CAME OUT OF YOUR MOUTHS? 439 00:15:15,815 --> 00:15:17,084 - WELL, WE WERE GOING TO, THOUGH WE WERE GONNA ASK 440 00:15:17,117 --> 00:15:18,285 FOR A PING-PONG TABLE. 441 00:15:18,318 --> 00:15:19,919 - PING-PONG TABLE? - MM-HMM. 442 00:15:19,953 --> 00:15:21,888 - WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST ASK FOR A CHECKER SET? 443 00:15:21,921 --> 00:15:24,124 PING-PONG IS NOT A MAN'S GAME. 444 00:15:24,157 --> 00:15:25,558 WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? 445 00:15:25,592 --> 00:15:28,428 POOL TABLE, BITCHES. BILLIARDS. 446 00:15:28,461 --> 00:15:30,430 I'M WORKING WITH CHILDREN, HERE. - I LOVE PING-PONG. 447 00:15:30,463 --> 00:15:32,099 - YEAH, YOU KNOW WHY? 'CAUSE PING-PONG IS AWESOME. 448 00:15:32,132 --> 00:15:33,933 - ARE YOU GOOD, JOHNNY? - HE THINKS HE IS. 449 00:15:33,967 --> 00:15:35,735 - I'M NOT SAYING I'M THE BEST PLAYER AT THE BARBECUE, 450 00:15:35,768 --> 00:15:37,270 BUT I'M THE PERSON THE BEST PLAYER WANTS TO BEAT. 451 00:15:37,304 --> 00:15:38,571 - SO YOU'RE SAYING YOU'RE THE SECOND-BEST? 452 00:15:38,605 --> 00:15:40,240 - SECOND, THIRD, DEPENDS ON THE BARBECUE. 453 00:15:40,273 --> 00:15:43,243 BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER, BECAUSE BRIAN BLEW IT. 454 00:15:43,276 --> 00:15:45,912 - I SIMPLY TOLD MR. O'SHEA THAT ALL HE OWED US 455 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:49,082 WAS A PROMISE TO MAKE A FEW CHANGES IN HIS DIET. 456 00:15:49,116 --> 00:15:50,984 - PING-PONG WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER. 457 00:15:51,018 --> 00:15:53,286 - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, TRYING TO CHANGE PEOPLE, KEVIN? 458 00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:56,189 PEOPLE DON'T WANT TO CHANGE. - OH, ON THE CONTRARY, 459 00:15:56,223 --> 00:15:59,259 THE BOYS IN AMBULANCE 14 HAVE ALL AGREED TO MAKE SOME CHANGES. 460 00:15:59,292 --> 00:16:00,593 HAVEN'T WE, FELLAS? HUH? 461 00:16:00,627 --> 00:16:02,095 - HEY, NO. - DON'T TOUCH ME. 462 00:16:02,129 --> 00:16:04,097 - I'M SORRY. - TERRIBLE IDEA. 463 00:16:04,131 --> 00:16:06,799 NEVER TRY TO CHANGE YOUR COWORKERS. 464 00:16:06,833 --> 00:16:10,103 I ONCE GAVE MAC WHAT I THOUGHT WAS CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM, 465 00:16:10,137 --> 00:16:12,039 AND MY KNEE HASN'T BEEN THE SAME SINCE. 466 00:16:12,072 --> 00:16:15,442 YOU EITHER ACCEPT SOMEONE OR YOU FIND A WAY TO GET RID OF THEM. 467 00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:17,010 - THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED TO SCOTTY. 468 00:16:17,044 --> 00:16:19,046 - THE DUDE WITH THE WEIRD-ASS EYES? 469 00:16:19,079 --> 00:16:21,714 - MM-HMM, FELT LIKE ONE EYE WAS ALWAYS LOOKING AT MY DICK. 470 00:16:21,748 --> 00:16:23,350 - I DON'T KNOW, CASH, MAYBE SOME SMALL CHANGES 471 00:16:23,383 --> 00:16:24,351 AROUND HERE COULD BE NICE? 472 00:16:24,384 --> 00:16:25,452 - THERE WE GO, PEOPLE. 473 00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:27,387 IT'S IN THE AIR. 474 00:16:27,420 --> 00:16:28,721 - YEAH, LIKE, MAYBE YOU COULD LET US PICK THE LUNCH PLACE 475 00:16:28,755 --> 00:16:30,723 EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE. - ABSOLUTELY NOT. 476 00:16:30,757 --> 00:16:33,793 - OR MAYBE YOU COULD START CALLING ME BY MY REAL NAME. 477 00:16:33,826 --> 00:16:36,363 THAT WOULD-- THAT WOULD BE A NICE CHANGE. 478 00:16:36,396 --> 00:16:39,666 - OR MAYBE WE COULD CHANGE YOUR NAME TO KEVIN. 479 00:16:39,699 --> 00:16:41,368 - I LIKE THAT. 480 00:16:41,401 --> 00:16:42,835 - I JUST THINK WE'RE CAPABLE OF MORE, YOU KNOW? 481 00:16:42,869 --> 00:16:45,372 MAYBE, LIKE, FOR INSTANCE, POLISH THUNDER. 482 00:16:45,405 --> 00:16:46,839 - I THINK IT'D BE JUST EASIER TO CHANGE HIS NAME 483 00:16:46,873 --> 00:16:48,841 TO KEVIN, DON'T YOU? - I THINK SO, TOO. 484 00:16:48,875 --> 00:16:51,010 WE'RE ON THE WAY TO THE HOSPITAL, MA'AM. 485 00:16:51,044 --> 00:16:53,680 HOW IS YOUR HIP? ARE YOU STILL IN PAIN? 486 00:16:53,713 --> 00:16:55,348 ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO ANYTHING? - MM-MM. 487 00:16:55,382 --> 00:16:56,549 - I'M GONNA GET YOU A LITTLE PAIN MEDICATION. 488 00:16:56,583 --> 00:16:58,218 YOU'LL FEEL BETTER IN NO TIME. 489 00:16:58,251 --> 00:17:00,353 - JOHNNY, I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT I REALLY APPRECIATE 490 00:17:00,387 --> 00:17:03,022 YOU CLOSING THE DOORS THIS TIME. - ONLY TOOK YOU THREE TRIES. 491 00:17:03,056 --> 00:17:04,691 - YEAH, I FORGOT THE LEFT DOOR HAD TO CLOSE FIRST. 492 00:17:04,724 --> 00:17:06,193 WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE SO DAMN COMPLICATED? 493 00:17:06,226 --> 00:17:08,228 - IT'S NOT RUBIK'S CUBE, BRO. 494 00:17:10,897 --> 00:17:13,900 YOU FEELING BETTER, MA'AM? - I AM. 495 00:17:13,933 --> 00:17:15,502 - YOU SEE THAT VOICE YOU'RE USING WITH HER, RIGHT THERE? 496 00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:17,404 YOU COULD USE THAT FOR EVERYBODY IN THIS RIG. 497 00:17:17,437 --> 00:17:19,739 - GAUZE. - NO, NICER. 498 00:17:19,772 --> 00:17:22,109 - I'M NOT PLAYING, BRIAN. GAUZE. 499 00:17:22,142 --> 00:17:24,944 - IT'S THE PITCH IN YOUR VOICE, YOUR TONE, 500 00:17:24,977 --> 00:17:26,546 MAYBE IT'S YOUR FACE. 501 00:17:26,579 --> 00:17:28,548 - WHAT? - IT'S MEAN. 502 00:17:28,581 --> 00:17:30,850 - YOU DO HAVE MEAN RESTING FACE. YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS? 503 00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:32,719 IT'S A BITCH FACE. - I DO NOT HAVE A BITCH FACE. 504 00:17:32,752 --> 00:17:34,454 YOU HAVE A BITCH FACE. 505 00:17:34,487 --> 00:17:35,888 DO YOU WANT ME TO TALK TO YOU LIKE A LITTLE OLD LADY? 506 00:17:35,922 --> 00:17:38,525 FINE. BRIAN... 507 00:17:38,558 --> 00:17:40,927 MAY I PLEASE HAVE SOME GAUZE? 508 00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:42,395 - WHY, CERTAINLY. 509 00:17:42,429 --> 00:17:44,931 - WHY, THANK YOU SO MUCH, BRIAN. 510 00:17:44,964 --> 00:17:46,566 - IT'S KIND OF CREEPY. 511 00:17:46,599 --> 00:17:49,102 - BRIAN, ARE THE DOORS CLOSED ENOUGH FOR YOU? 512 00:17:49,136 --> 00:17:51,738 IS YOUR LITTLE BODY ABLE TO HANDLE THE STRESS BACK THERE? 513 00:17:51,771 --> 00:17:53,806 - ALL RIGHT, THAT'S ENOUGH. 514 00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:55,975 I GET IT, I FEEL LIKE I'M IN A HORROR MOVIE. 515 00:17:56,008 --> 00:17:57,877 NOT MY GENRE. - LIKE I SAID, WE HAVE A SYSTEM. 516 00:17:57,910 --> 00:17:59,412 THINGS ARE THE WAY THEY ARE FOR A REASON. 517 00:17:59,446 --> 00:18:00,813 - DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE WOULD DIE HERE 518 00:18:00,847 --> 00:18:02,749 IF WE WORKED LIKE THAT? - CHANGE KILLS, BRO. 519 00:18:02,782 --> 00:18:05,118 - LISTEN, I'M JUST THANKFUL THAT YOU GUYS TRIED TO CHANGE AT ALL. 520 00:18:05,152 --> 00:18:06,153 - [murmuring] 521 00:18:06,186 --> 00:18:08,155 - WHAT WAS THAT, MA'AM? 522 00:18:08,188 --> 00:18:09,956 - COULD YOU TURN UP THE RADIO? 523 00:18:09,989 --> 00:18:12,459 I LOVE THIS TUNE. 524 00:18:12,492 --> 00:18:14,261 - THE RADIO'S NOT ON, MA'AM. 525 00:18:14,294 --> 00:18:15,595 WOULD YOU LIKE US TO PLAY SOMETHING FOR YOU? 526 00:18:15,628 --> 00:18:19,299 - LET'S DANCE THE SHAG, STRAWBERRY JAM, 527 00:18:19,332 --> 00:18:23,069 YOU BOYS KNOW THAT I LOVE PENNIES? 528 00:18:23,102 --> 00:18:25,104 - OH, I LOVE A GOOD OLD-FASHIONED MORPHINE RAMBLE. 529 00:18:25,138 --> 00:18:27,140 - IT HAS BEEN SO LONG. - SHE'S SO CUTE. 530 00:18:27,174 --> 00:18:31,611 - I HID ART FOR THE NAZIS. 531 00:18:31,644 --> 00:18:34,847 - OKAY, SO NOW I HAVE A NEW WORST PERSON I'VE SAVED. 532 00:18:34,881 --> 00:18:37,317 - NO, AARON RODGERS, BRO. 533 00:18:37,350 --> 00:18:39,452 - NOPE. NO, THIS IS WORSE. 534 00:18:44,056 --> 00:18:48,027 [knocking] - COME IN. 535 00:18:48,060 --> 00:18:51,298 - MR. O'SHEA, FAT SKINNY EDDIE, 536 00:18:51,331 --> 00:18:53,300 I JUST WANT TO APOLOGIZE FOR THE OTHER DAY. 537 00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:54,967 I MAY HAVE BEEN TOO HARSH. 538 00:18:55,001 --> 00:18:56,603 I'VE BEEN TOLD THAT I CAN BE A LITTLE ANNOYING 539 00:18:56,636 --> 00:18:58,305 WHEN I GET ON MY HIGH HORSE. 540 00:18:58,338 --> 00:18:59,772 - YOU DID WHAT I COULDN'T. 541 00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:01,274 - [chuckles] OH, IT WAS NOTHING. 542 00:19:01,308 --> 00:19:03,343 I JUST GAVE MR. O A DEFIBRILLATION OF TRUTH 543 00:19:03,376 --> 00:19:04,444 FROM THE HEART. 544 00:19:04,477 --> 00:19:06,012 IT'S WHAT I DO. 545 00:19:06,045 --> 00:19:07,480 - EDWARD, WOULD YOU GRAB ME 546 00:19:07,514 --> 00:19:09,349 SOME SPARKLING WATER AND LEMON, PLEASE? 547 00:19:09,382 --> 00:19:11,518 - YOU GOT IT. 548 00:19:18,090 --> 00:19:22,729 - LOOK, I AIN'T GONNA CHANGE, KID. 549 00:19:22,762 --> 00:19:24,464 BUT I WANT FAT EDDIE TO BE HAPPY. 550 00:19:24,497 --> 00:19:27,834 HE DESERVES IT FOR PUTTING UP WITH ME FOR SO LONG. 551 00:19:27,867 --> 00:19:33,306 I'M WILLING TO FAKE IT, OUT OF LOVE. 552 00:19:33,340 --> 00:19:34,907 - HEY, BOSS, THEY ONLY HAD STILL. 553 00:19:34,941 --> 00:19:37,377 - COME HERE. [chuckles] 554 00:19:37,410 --> 00:19:39,379 - 25 YEARS, I'VE NEVER GOTTEN A HUG. 555 00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:41,180 - THEN GET IN THIS THING. 556 00:19:41,214 --> 00:19:43,950 - NO, ABSOLUTELY NOT. 557 00:19:49,622 --> 00:19:51,924 - HEY, IS THAT FROM JIMMY O? 558 00:19:51,958 --> 00:19:53,192 HOW'D HE KNOW WE WANTED ONE OF THESE THINGS? 559 00:19:53,226 --> 00:19:54,060 BRI, DID YOU GO TALK TO HIM AGAIN? 560 00:19:54,093 --> 00:19:55,495 - I DID, BUT-- 561 00:19:55,528 --> 00:19:56,896 - IT'S NOT FROM JIMMY O, ASSHOLES. 562 00:19:56,929 --> 00:19:58,365 IT'S FROM ME. 563 00:19:58,398 --> 00:20:00,032 I'M NOT GONNA CHANGE FOR ANY OF YOU, 564 00:20:00,066 --> 00:20:01,701 BUT I WILL BUY YOU A PING-PONG TABLE. 565 00:20:01,734 --> 00:20:03,035 - OH, MAN. - THANK YOU. 566 00:20:03,069 --> 00:20:04,537 - THANK YOU, IT MEANS A LOT, CASH. 567 00:20:04,571 --> 00:20:07,540 - YOU'RE WELCOME, KEVIN. GODDAMN PING-PONG. 568 00:20:07,574 --> 00:20:10,710 THAT BALL IS EVERYWHERE, GOING UNDERNEATH EVERY GODDAMN THING, 569 00:20:10,743 --> 00:20:12,445 IMPOSSIBLE TO REACH. 570 00:20:12,479 --> 00:20:14,213 WON'T BE NO BALLS IN TWO DAYS. 571 00:20:14,247 --> 00:20:16,383 I AIN'T BUYING NEW ONES, NOBODY WILL. 572 00:20:16,416 --> 00:20:18,885 THAT TABLE'S GONNA BE A COAT RACK IN A WEEK. 573 00:20:22,322 --> 00:20:23,890 - LITTLE HELP? - NO. 574 00:20:29,796 --> 00:20:31,063 - PONY TIME, YEAH, PONY TIME. ALL RIGHT, PONY TIME, 575 00:20:31,097 --> 00:20:32,865 OKAY, PONY TIME, HEY. 576 00:20:32,899 --> 00:20:37,236 I SEE THE PONY. PONY TIME, PONY-- 577 00:20:37,270 --> 00:20:41,774 OH, MY GOD. TONY. 578 00:20:41,808 --> 00:20:43,410 - WHAT UP, MAN? - [neighs] 579 00:20:43,443 --> 00:20:47,447 - IT'S ME, WILLIAM. I GO BY BILLY NOW. 580 00:20:47,480 --> 00:20:48,781 YOU PROBABLY DON'T RECOGNIZE ME 'CAUSE I WAS A LITTLE BIGGER 581 00:20:48,815 --> 00:20:50,149 WHEN I WAS A KID, THOUGH. 582 00:20:50,182 --> 00:20:51,918 THIS IS MY PARTNER, T. - HI, TONY. 583 00:20:51,951 --> 00:20:53,953 - SHE'S HOT, RIGHT? 584 00:20:53,986 --> 00:20:56,556 ALL RIGHT, TONY, WE ABOUT TO DO THIS THING, ALL RIGHT? 585 00:20:56,589 --> 00:20:58,891 THIS IS GONNA HAPPEN. HERE YOU GO. 586 00:20:58,925 --> 00:21:00,660 THIS IS GONNA HAPPEN TODAY. THAT'S IT. 587 00:21:00,693 --> 00:21:02,495 - HE LOVES IT. - [laughs] 588 00:21:02,529 --> 00:21:03,630 - YEAH. - OH. 589 00:21:03,663 --> 00:21:05,965 - GOOD BOY. - TONY. 590 00:21:05,998 --> 00:21:08,000 - OH, YEAH. - OH. 591 00:21:08,034 --> 00:21:10,670 - YEAH, SEE? T, LOOK, I'M DOING IT. 592 00:21:10,703 --> 00:21:11,971 - I KNOW. - I'M ON THE 26th STREET PONY. 593 00:21:12,004 --> 00:21:13,506 CAN YOU TAKE A PICTURE REAL QUICK? 594 00:21:13,540 --> 00:21:14,841 - ALL RIGHT, I GOT IT. - OF ME AND MY BOY, T? 595 00:21:14,874 --> 00:21:16,075 - OKAY. 596 00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:17,977 ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. - TONY. 597 00:21:18,010 --> 00:21:19,346 - TONY, LOOK AT THE CAMERA, BABY, OH. 598 00:21:19,379 --> 00:21:24,016 OH! 599 00:21:24,050 --> 00:21:25,752 HEY, DID WE GET IT? 600 00:21:25,785 --> 00:21:28,421 - YEAH, I GOT IT. 601 00:21:28,455 --> 00:21:29,656 - NICE.