1
00:00:00,083 --> 00:00:01,872
Jake, you gotta see this.
2
00:00:01,873 --> 00:00:03,006
There's something going on here.
3
00:00:03,007 --> 00:00:07,044
Something a little...
hairy.
4
00:00:07,045 --> 00:00:08,278
Nope.
5
00:00:08,279 --> 00:00:09,279
Don't see anything
out of the ordinary.
6
00:00:09,280 --> 00:00:10,447
Really?
7
00:00:10,448 --> 00:00:13,716
Well, maybe I should...
frame the question differently.
8
00:00:14,225 --> 00:00:16,653
Terry, do you notice anything?
9
00:00:16,654 --> 00:00:18,689
Amy?
10
00:00:18,690 --> 00:00:19,810
New shirt?
11
00:00:19,811 --> 00:00:21,225
Oh, come on, guys.
12
00:00:21,226 --> 00:00:23,227
I grew a goatee,
and it looks amazing,
13
00:00:23,228 --> 00:00:24,261
and I know you can see it.
14
00:00:24,262 --> 00:00:25,295
Of course we can see it,
Charles.
15
00:00:25,296 --> 00:00:26,597
It's horrible.
16
00:00:26,598 --> 00:00:28,232
It looks like you unclogged
a shower drain
17
00:00:28,233 --> 00:00:29,366
with your mouth.
18
00:00:29,367 --> 00:00:30,500
Yeah, you look exactly
like the guy
19
00:00:30,501 --> 00:00:33,070
in the "Don't Talk to Strangers"
poster.
20
00:00:33,071 --> 00:00:34,361
No, I don't.
21
00:00:34,362 --> 00:00:35,472
Are you talking
about your new goatee?
22
00:00:35,473 --> 00:00:36,488
Mm-hmm.
23
00:00:36,489 --> 00:00:37,841
I think it's a good choice
for your face.
24
00:00:37,842 --> 00:00:38,876
Come over here,
so I can take a better look.
25
00:00:38,877 --> 00:00:40,110
Thank you, Captain.
26
00:00:40,111 --> 00:00:41,545
I knew you'd appreciate Bianca.
27
00:00:41,546 --> 00:00:43,080
That's right; I call her Bianca
28
00:00:43,081 --> 00:00:44,248
because she's dark and thick
29
00:00:44,249 --> 00:00:46,550
like my first cousin Bianca.
30
00:00:46,551 --> 00:00:48,545
Jeffords, Peralta, now.
31
00:00:49,120 --> 00:00:50,120
Wh...
32
00:00:50,121 --> 00:00:51,455
Say good-bye to Bianca, Boyle.
33
00:00:52,457 --> 00:00:53,895
No!
34
00:00:53,896 --> 00:00:57,707
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.addic7ed.com/
35
00:01:14,712 --> 00:01:16,213
Hey, Charles.
36
00:01:16,214 --> 00:01:17,614
I want to ask you something,
37
00:01:17,615 --> 00:01:19,216
but you have to promise
not to get excited and weird.
38
00:01:19,217 --> 00:01:20,851
I can't promise anything
of the sort.
39
00:01:20,852 --> 00:01:22,200
It's about restaurants.
40
00:01:23,721 --> 00:01:25,125
I'm so glad
I didn't make that promise.
41
00:01:25,126 --> 00:01:26,089
Oh, boy.
42
00:01:26,090 --> 00:01:27,190
All right, where do you take
your dad
43
00:01:27,191 --> 00:01:28,191
when you want to go
someplace special?
44
00:01:28,192 --> 00:01:29,192
Great question.
45
00:01:29,193 --> 00:01:30,193
We go to Csaba.
46
00:01:30,194 --> 00:01:31,228
It's a Hungarian restaurant
47
00:01:31,229 --> 00:01:32,663
that serves "Tál ezer kolbász,"
48
00:01:32,664 --> 00:01:35,051
the platter
of a thousand sausages.
49
00:01:35,052 --> 00:01:35,966
Ugh.
50
00:01:35,967 --> 00:01:37,234
It's symbolic of our manhood.
51
00:01:37,235 --> 00:01:38,535
Okay, I should've saved
the "ugh" till then.
52
00:01:38,536 --> 00:01:40,404
Anyways, I'll try and get
a reservation.
53
00:01:40,405 --> 00:01:41,772
My dad's coming into town,
54
00:01:41,773 --> 00:01:43,106
and we're going out to dinner
tonight.
55
00:01:43,107 --> 00:01:44,341
Why are you going to dinner
with him?
56
00:01:44,342 --> 00:01:46,476
He hasn't visited you
in six years.
57
00:01:46,477 --> 00:01:48,078
Yeah, he's busy.
He's an airline pilot.
58
00:01:48,079 --> 00:01:49,146
Regional airline.
59
00:01:49,147 --> 00:01:50,483
He flies internationally.
60
00:01:50,484 --> 00:01:51,949
Quebec to Albany.
61
00:01:51,950 --> 00:01:53,050
What is going on here?
62
00:01:53,051 --> 00:01:54,051
What's your problem with my dad?
63
00:01:54,052 --> 00:01:55,052
I'm just being wary.
64
00:01:55,053 --> 00:01:56,453
He left you when you were seven,
65
00:01:56,454 --> 00:01:58,069
and he's been letting us down
ever since.
66
00:01:58,070 --> 00:01:59,089
Us?
67
00:01:59,090 --> 00:02:00,357
I think of you
as a brother, Jake,
68
00:02:00,358 --> 00:02:02,726
so he didn't just abandon you;
He abandoned us.
69
00:02:02,727 --> 00:02:04,227
Look, I know he hasn't been
the best dad in the past,
70
00:02:04,228 --> 00:02:05,696
but he's changed.
71
00:02:05,697 --> 00:02:07,297
Check it out.
We've been texting.
72
00:02:07,298 --> 00:02:08,585
"New phone.
Who dis?"
73
00:02:08,586 --> 00:02:09,900
No, below that.
Oh.
74
00:02:09,901 --> 00:02:11,969
See, he's coming into town
just to see me.
75
00:02:11,970 --> 00:02:13,737
All right, we're gonna go out
to dinner tonight,
76
00:02:13,738 --> 00:02:14,838
then maybe take a walk
through the park,
77
00:02:14,839 --> 00:02:16,106
possibly a carriage ride.
78
00:02:16,107 --> 00:02:18,442
If I get chilly,
he could loan me his coat.
79
00:02:18,443 --> 00:02:19,710
I'm describing a date.
80
00:02:19,711 --> 00:02:20,744
I don't know what fathers
and sons do,
81
00:02:20,745 --> 00:02:21,811
but I'm gonna find out!
82
00:02:24,315 --> 00:02:25,816
Joining us for lunch, sir?
83
00:02:25,817 --> 00:02:27,250
Oh, no, I've already consumed
the required calories
84
00:02:27,251 --> 00:02:28,355
for this day period.
85
00:02:28,356 --> 00:02:29,773
Yummy.
86
00:02:29,774 --> 00:02:31,855
But I do have
some fun lunch chitchat.
87
00:02:31,856 --> 00:02:33,023
When I was a detective,
88
00:02:33,024 --> 00:02:34,224
my old c.o., Jim Martins,
89
00:02:34,225 --> 00:02:35,820
used to keep us on our toes
90
00:02:35,821 --> 00:02:37,928
by have us solve brain teasers.
91
00:02:37,929 --> 00:02:40,464
I thought maybe you'd like
to try one.
92
00:02:40,465 --> 00:02:41,465
Don't just tease my brain,
Captain.
93
00:02:41,466 --> 00:02:43,033
Really go to town on it.
94
00:02:43,034 --> 00:02:44,935
Yeah, bring it on, sir.
95
00:02:44,936 --> 00:02:46,236
I love puzzles.
96
00:02:46,237 --> 00:02:47,704
They're like power squats
for your mind.
97
00:02:47,705 --> 00:02:49,106
Good.
Here's a problem.
98
00:02:49,107 --> 00:02:51,461
There are 12 men on an island.
99
00:02:51,462 --> 00:02:54,214
11 weigh exactly
the same amount,
100
00:02:54,215 --> 00:02:57,514
but one of them is
slightly lighter or heavier.
101
00:02:57,515 --> 00:02:59,016
You must figure out which.
102
00:02:59,017 --> 00:03:00,751
And what do these men look like
facially
103
00:03:00,752 --> 00:03:02,652
and with respect
to their bodies?
104
00:03:02,653 --> 00:03:03,807
It's unimportant.
105
00:03:03,808 --> 00:03:05,355
So like Tyrese.
106
00:03:05,356 --> 00:03:07,691
It's a land of Tyreses.
107
00:03:07,692 --> 00:03:08,959
Sure.
108
00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:11,228
The island has no scales,
109
00:03:11,229 --> 00:03:13,997
but there is a seesaw.
110
00:03:13,998 --> 00:03:16,033
The exciting catch:
111
00:03:16,034 --> 00:03:18,335
You can only use it three times.
112
00:03:18,336 --> 00:03:19,336
That sounds super exciting.
113
00:03:19,337 --> 00:03:20,404
Is this thing mandatory?
114
00:03:20,405 --> 00:03:21,908
Oh, I hope so.
Please say yes.
115
00:03:21,909 --> 00:03:24,808
No, but there is a prize
for whoever solves it first.
116
00:03:24,809 --> 00:03:26,276
Two tickets to this Sunday's
117
00:03:26,277 --> 00:03:28,952
Beyoncé Knowles
rock music concert.
118
00:03:28,953 --> 00:03:30,328
I'm in.
119
00:03:30,329 --> 00:03:31,663
Marcus loves Beyoncé.
120
00:03:31,664 --> 00:03:33,128
Everyone loves Beyoncé.
121
00:03:33,129 --> 00:03:34,885
My girls were conceived
to Bootylicious.
122
00:03:34,886 --> 00:03:37,252
Don't tell my wife
I told you that.
123
00:03:38,523 --> 00:03:39,956
Whoop.
124
00:03:39,957 --> 00:03:42,726
Guys, my dad just texted.
He's in the building.
125
00:03:42,727 --> 00:03:43,727
Scully, stop eating.
126
00:03:43,728 --> 00:03:44,961
Terry, start flexing.
127
00:03:44,962 --> 00:03:46,720
Everybody be cool.
128
00:03:46,721 --> 00:03:48,513
Paging Detective Jake Peralta.
129
00:03:48,514 --> 00:03:49,561
Ah, Dad!
130
00:03:49,562 --> 00:03:50,801
How are you, son?
131
00:03:50,802 --> 00:03:52,022
Good to see you.
132
00:03:52,023 --> 00:03:53,036
Hey.
133
00:03:53,037 --> 00:03:55,338
Everyone, this is my dad.
134
00:03:55,339 --> 00:03:57,407
Hey, introduce yourself
in your captain's voice.
135
00:03:57,408 --> 00:03:59,976
Folks, this is
your pilot speaking,
136
00:03:59,977 --> 00:04:01,234
Captain Roger Peralta.
137
00:04:01,235 --> 00:04:03,616
If you look to your left,
you'll see me,
138
00:04:03,617 --> 00:04:05,048
making your acquaintance.
139
00:04:05,049 --> 00:04:06,114
Love that.
140
00:04:06,115 --> 00:04:07,984
Hi, I'm Jake's best friend,
Charles.
141
00:04:07,985 --> 00:04:08,985
How are you?
142
00:04:08,986 --> 00:04:09,986
Pop quiz:
143
00:04:09,987 --> 00:04:10,987
What's Jake allergic to?
144
00:04:10,988 --> 00:04:12,222
Bees.
And wasps.
145
00:04:12,223 --> 00:04:13,924
Guy didn't even include wasps.
146
00:04:13,925 --> 00:04:14,925
Huh!
147
00:04:14,926 --> 00:04:16,793
Wasps.
Those aren't even real.
148
00:04:16,794 --> 00:04:17,861
Oh, hey, Captain Holt.
149
00:04:17,862 --> 00:04:20,008
Come meet my dad,
Captain Peralta.
150
00:04:20,009 --> 00:04:21,864
Hello, Captain.
Captain.
151
00:04:24,100 --> 00:04:25,936
This is super weird for me.
152
00:04:25,937 --> 00:04:28,038
Captain.
Captain.
153
00:04:28,039 --> 00:04:29,206
Anyways, you guys,
154
00:04:29,207 --> 00:04:30,907
my dad is the best pilot.
155
00:04:30,908 --> 00:04:31,908
Oh, come on.
156
00:04:31,909 --> 00:04:33,143
Tell them about Oregon.
157
00:04:33,144 --> 00:04:35,212
Okay, this one time
I'm in Eugene,
158
00:04:35,213 --> 00:04:37,681
I'm hitching a ride in
the jump seat of a commuter jet.
159
00:04:37,682 --> 00:04:39,481
I'm sleeping off
a wicked hangover.
160
00:04:39,482 --> 00:04:40,482
Noice.
161
00:04:40,483 --> 00:04:41,918
All of a sudden,
there's a jolt and a boom.
162
00:04:41,919 --> 00:04:43,120
A bird.
It was a bird.
163
00:04:43,121 --> 00:04:44,654
Yeah, we sucked a bird
into our intake.
164
00:04:44,655 --> 00:04:46,623
Next thing I know, the cabin's
filling up with smoke,
165
00:04:46,624 --> 00:04:47,869
alarm's going off,
166
00:04:47,870 --> 00:04:50,293
engine flames out and dies.
167
00:04:50,294 --> 00:04:51,595
We are in a dead stall.
168
00:04:51,596 --> 00:04:53,997
I look over at the pilot,
Sam Power...
169
00:04:53,998 --> 00:04:54,998
Great name.
170
00:04:54,999 --> 00:04:56,399
He's white as a sheet.
171
00:04:56,400 --> 00:04:57,968
And he says to me...
I'll never forget what he said.
172
00:04:57,969 --> 00:05:01,972
He says,
"Bobby's got a big ol' butt."
173
00:05:01,973 --> 00:05:03,473
Turns out he's having a stroke.
174
00:05:03,474 --> 00:05:05,011
Bring the plane down
on a highway,
175
00:05:05,012 --> 00:05:06,776
right across from a rest area.
176
00:05:06,777 --> 00:05:08,545
Get on the PA,
177
00:05:08,546 --> 00:05:11,014
I say, "Folks,
178
00:05:11,015 --> 00:05:12,894
coffee's on me."
179
00:05:12,895 --> 00:05:14,317
What?
Wow.
180
00:05:14,318 --> 00:05:15,685
Are you kidding me?
181
00:05:15,686 --> 00:05:17,320
Anyway, I'm not here
to talk about me.
182
00:05:17,321 --> 00:05:19,564
I'm here to spend some time
with my boy.
183
00:05:19,565 --> 00:05:21,024
Ah, Dad.
184
00:05:21,025 --> 00:05:22,492
It's good to see you.
You too.
185
00:05:22,493 --> 00:05:23,860
Oh, hey, let me give you
a tour of the precinct.
186
00:05:23,861 --> 00:05:24,895
Cool.
187
00:05:24,896 --> 00:05:26,630
Ooh, you can interrogate
one of my perps.
188
00:05:26,631 --> 00:05:28,825
No, he can't.
Don't do that, Jake!
189
00:05:33,671 --> 00:05:35,205
You might as well save yourself
some paper
190
00:05:35,206 --> 00:05:36,773
and give up now, Sarge.
191
00:05:36,774 --> 00:05:38,542
You know I'm going to solve
this first.
192
00:05:38,543 --> 00:05:39,876
You probably can't tell,
193
00:05:39,877 --> 00:05:42,679
but I'm flexing my brain
like crazy right now.
194
00:05:42,680 --> 00:05:45,115
Yeah, you're both
wasting your time.
195
00:05:45,116 --> 00:05:46,550
Beyoncé's my spiritual twin.
196
00:05:46,551 --> 00:05:48,185
Those tickets are my birthright.
197
00:05:48,186 --> 00:05:50,820
No offense, but this is gonna
come down to me and the sarge.
198
00:05:50,821 --> 00:05:52,522
Whoa, you think you two
are the only ones
199
00:05:52,523 --> 00:05:53,790
that can solve puzzles?
200
00:05:53,791 --> 00:05:56,126
Yeah, what about Rosa, Gina,
and me?
201
00:05:56,127 --> 00:05:57,694
Is this how you want to die,
Hitchcock?
202
00:05:57,695 --> 00:06:00,030
Look, it's just that the sarge
and I are really into puzzles.
203
00:06:00,031 --> 00:06:02,232
Remember when I took
that Sudoku cruise?
204
00:06:02,233 --> 00:06:03,633
I never even went on deck.
205
00:06:03,634 --> 00:06:05,602
100 bucks says Gina and I
can solve this thing
206
00:06:05,603 --> 00:06:07,871
before you two puzzle dorks.
207
00:06:10,074 --> 00:06:11,661
Deal.
208
00:06:11,662 --> 00:06:13,109
You're going down.
209
00:06:13,110 --> 00:06:16,780
You're really not a part
of this, Hitchcock.
210
00:06:17,782 --> 00:06:19,115
Did they bring out more sausage
211
00:06:19,116 --> 00:06:20,483
while I was in the bathroom?
212
00:06:20,484 --> 00:06:22,184
No, that's still
the first mountain.
213
00:06:22,643 --> 00:06:23,653
Good Lord.
214
00:06:23,654 --> 00:06:25,589
Anyways, do you remember
what you always did
215
00:06:25,590 --> 00:06:27,090
when you'd take me to dinner
as a kid?
216
00:06:27,091 --> 00:06:28,692
Tell the waitress
it was your birthday,
217
00:06:28,693 --> 00:06:29,759
so we'd get a free dessert?
218
00:06:29,760 --> 00:06:30,760
I already did it.
219
00:06:31,896 --> 00:06:33,016
I just told them
it was your birthday.
220
00:06:33,017 --> 00:06:33,897
Come on.
221
00:06:33,898 --> 00:06:35,198
Looks like we're going to get
222
00:06:35,199 --> 00:06:38,034
two free probably disgusting
sausage-filled desserts.
223
00:06:38,035 --> 00:06:39,169
This is pretty fun, right?
224
00:06:39,170 --> 00:06:40,604
I mean, we're actually bonding.
225
00:06:40,605 --> 00:06:42,734
Jake, there's something I want
to talk to you about.
226
00:06:42,735 --> 00:06:45,408
Last week I was flying
into Albany from Quebec,
227
00:06:45,409 --> 00:06:48,011
you know how I always
keep my snowboard with me
228
00:06:48,012 --> 00:06:49,616
in case I get a chance
to carve...
229
00:06:49,617 --> 00:06:50,947
So cool.
230
00:06:50,948 --> 00:06:53,183
Well, Canadian customs found
some prescription meds
231
00:06:53,184 --> 00:06:54,317
in my board bag.
232
00:06:54,318 --> 00:06:55,747
They're accusing me
of smuggling.
233
00:06:55,748 --> 00:06:56,753
What?
234
00:06:56,754 --> 00:06:57,754
Yeah, I have no idea
how they got in there.
235
00:06:57,755 --> 00:06:58,788
They're not mine.
236
00:06:58,789 --> 00:06:59,789
But it's bad.
237
00:06:59,790 --> 00:07:01,758
I could lose my pilot's license.
238
00:07:01,759 --> 00:07:03,493
But you're the best pilot
in the world,
239
00:07:03,494 --> 00:07:05,695
I'm guessing without knowing
anything about the field.
240
00:07:05,696 --> 00:07:06,863
I'm really in a bind here.
241
00:07:06,864 --> 00:07:09,766
Jake, I need your help.
242
00:07:09,767 --> 00:07:13,264
That's actually
the reason I'm here.
243
00:07:13,265 --> 00:07:15,305
Oh.
244
00:07:15,306 --> 00:07:16,373
That's the reason.
245
00:07:16,374 --> 00:07:19,349
Happy sausage birthday
to both of you.
246
00:07:26,129 --> 00:07:27,663
All right, let's talk
about my dad's case.
247
00:07:27,664 --> 00:07:29,198
The case of why he came to town?
248
00:07:29,199 --> 00:07:30,566
I solved it:
249
00:07:30,567 --> 00:07:32,268
Because he wanted
to take advantage of his son.
250
00:07:32,269 --> 00:07:33,269
Okay, fine.
251
00:07:33,270 --> 00:07:34,637
First I was a little upset,
252
00:07:34,638 --> 00:07:36,304
but then I realized
this is great.
253
00:07:36,339 --> 00:07:37,706
You know, we'll get to spend
some time together,
254
00:07:37,707 --> 00:07:39,068
and he'll see
what a good cop I am.
255
00:07:39,076 --> 00:07:40,176
He should already think
you're great.
256
00:07:40,177 --> 00:07:41,343
Like with my dad,
257
00:07:41,344 --> 00:07:42,778
he doesn't need me to prove
to him
258
00:07:42,779 --> 00:07:44,680
that Jake Peralta is
the best cop in the precinct.
259
00:07:44,681 --> 00:07:45,947
He knows it!
260
00:07:45,982 --> 00:07:46,982
Tell us about the case.
261
00:07:46,983 --> 00:07:48,184
Here's what we know so far.
262
00:07:48,185 --> 00:07:50,319
One, Hungarian sausage
is an oily mess,
263
00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:52,287
and it causes nonstop dumps.
264
00:07:52,322 --> 00:07:53,989
The incontinence
is a small price to pay
265
00:07:53,990 --> 00:07:54,989
for the deliciousness.
266
00:07:54,991 --> 00:07:56,125
It's disgusting,
267
00:07:56,126 --> 00:07:57,326
and it was
a terrible recommendation.
268
00:07:57,327 --> 00:07:59,195
Two, the Canadian cops
think that my dad
269
00:07:59,196 --> 00:08:00,896
used his security clearance
to smuggle in
270
00:08:00,897 --> 00:08:02,965
over a thousand pills
of Turgidol.
271
00:08:02,966 --> 00:08:04,733
Canadian erection medication.
272
00:08:04,734 --> 00:08:06,302
Very potent.
273
00:08:06,303 --> 00:08:07,936
What?
I don't need it.
274
00:08:09,339 --> 00:08:10,538
But I love it.
275
00:08:10,574 --> 00:08:11,841
Oh, boy.
276
00:08:11,842 --> 00:08:13,676
Three, the case against him
looks pretty solid.
277
00:08:13,677 --> 00:08:15,844
Four, he's never been
a good dad to Jake.
278
00:08:15,879 --> 00:08:17,713
Five, he has been a good dad,
279
00:08:17,714 --> 00:08:20,182
especially from ages
zero through seven
280
00:08:20,183 --> 00:08:22,084
and yesterday through forever.
281
00:08:22,085 --> 00:08:25,153
Six, nonstop dumps.
282
00:08:25,188 --> 00:08:26,321
Enough.
How did you read these files?
283
00:08:26,356 --> 00:08:27,423
They're in French.
284
00:08:27,424 --> 00:08:29,157
Scully translated them for me.
285
00:08:29,192 --> 00:08:30,860
When I was nine,
my parents took me to Paris,
286
00:08:30,861 --> 00:08:32,761
and they accidentally left me
at the Louvre.
287
00:08:32,762 --> 00:08:33,963
By the time they figured it out,
288
00:08:33,964 --> 00:08:35,330
they were already
back in Queens.
289
00:08:35,365 --> 00:08:37,365
Okay, no one cares
about your boring life, Scully.
290
00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:39,568
This is about my dad
and proving his innocence.
291
00:08:39,569 --> 00:08:41,337
Sir, I'd like to go to Canada
for a few days
292
00:08:41,338 --> 00:08:42,403
and help him out.
293
00:08:42,439 --> 00:08:44,273
Of course,
but take Boyle with you.
294
00:08:44,274 --> 00:08:45,908
It'd be good to have
an objective set of eyes.
295
00:08:45,909 --> 00:08:48,944
Fine, but under protest
because he's a jerk.
296
00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:50,513
Also, we'd like to take Scully
with us.
297
00:08:50,514 --> 00:08:51,714
Well, perfect.
298
00:08:51,715 --> 00:08:52,882
I do you a favor;
You do me one too.
299
00:08:52,883 --> 00:08:54,350
Thank you.
300
00:08:54,351 --> 00:08:56,752
All right, there is no way
we let Amy and the sarge
301
00:08:56,753 --> 00:08:58,087
beat us.
302
00:08:58,088 --> 00:09:00,288
We sit here
until we figure this thing out.
303
00:09:00,323 --> 00:09:01,789
Rosa, my mind is ready.
304
00:09:01,825 --> 00:09:03,325
Okay.
305
00:09:03,326 --> 00:09:04,760
"There's an island with 12 men."
306
00:09:04,761 --> 00:09:08,230
Oh, I'm so bored.
I cannot do it.
307
00:09:08,231 --> 00:09:09,698
I can do this.
308
00:09:09,699 --> 00:09:11,367
One guy's slightly heavier.
309
00:09:11,368 --> 00:09:13,903
There's a seesaw.
310
00:09:13,904 --> 00:09:15,638
I got it.
311
00:09:15,639 --> 00:09:17,339
You use the seesaw to press down
on their necks
312
00:09:17,340 --> 00:09:18,439
until fatty confesses.
313
00:09:18,475 --> 00:09:19,774
Incorrect.
Damn.
314
00:09:19,809 --> 00:09:21,510
And disturbing.
315
00:09:21,511 --> 00:09:22,645
Hello,
ladies and gentlemen.
316
00:09:22,646 --> 00:09:24,280
This is your captain speaking.
317
00:09:24,281 --> 00:09:25,748
That's my dad.
318
00:09:25,749 --> 00:09:28,017
The captain talking right now,
I came out of his body.
319
00:09:28,018 --> 00:09:29,218
No big deal.
320
00:09:29,219 --> 00:09:30,653
We're headed
for an on-time arrival
321
00:09:30,654 --> 00:09:31,887
in Drummondville, Quebec.
322
00:09:31,888 --> 00:09:33,522
Folks, this is a special flight
for me,
323
00:09:33,523 --> 00:09:37,393
because sitting in seat 3B
is my son, Jake Peralta,
324
00:09:37,394 --> 00:09:38,626
one of New York's finest.
325
00:09:38,662 --> 00:09:40,629
Oh.
326
00:09:40,630 --> 00:09:41,630
Thanks, Dad!
327
00:09:41,631 --> 00:09:43,899
Love you too.
328
00:09:43,900 --> 00:09:44,934
Got to admit,
it was pretty nice of him
329
00:09:44,935 --> 00:09:46,402
to bump us up to first class.
330
00:09:46,403 --> 00:09:49,170
Ugh, this plush fabric
is making my rump sweat.
331
00:09:49,206 --> 00:09:51,006
Maybe you're just
a little too uncultured
332
00:09:51,007 --> 00:09:54,609
to enjoy such a sophisticated
kind of an experience.
333
00:09:54,644 --> 00:09:55,877
Oh, brother.
334
00:09:55,912 --> 00:09:58,479
What do you say
there, Scully, old boy?
335
00:09:58,515 --> 00:10:00,015
Look at this nut mix:
336
00:10:00,016 --> 00:10:02,151
It's half cashews!
337
00:10:02,152 --> 00:10:03,518
I hope we never land!
338
00:10:03,553 --> 00:10:04,587
So loud.
339
00:10:04,588 --> 00:10:05,588
Hey, guys.
340
00:10:05,589 --> 00:10:07,223
How you enjoying the flight?
341
00:10:07,224 --> 00:10:08,591
So how's the case going?
342
00:10:08,592 --> 00:10:09,959
Oh, good.
343
00:10:09,960 --> 00:10:11,160
We already have four suspects
344
00:10:11,161 --> 00:10:12,494
who work at the airport,
345
00:10:12,495 --> 00:10:13,662
and I want to talk
to your girlfriend, Denise,
346
00:10:13,663 --> 00:10:14,829
because she had access
to your bags.
347
00:10:14,864 --> 00:10:16,832
Not on the night in question.
348
00:10:16,833 --> 00:10:19,335
She's been spending some time
at her place.
349
00:10:19,336 --> 00:10:20,935
Relationships are complicated.
350
00:10:20,971 --> 00:10:23,504
You cheated on her a bunch,
and she found out.
351
00:10:23,540 --> 00:10:24,740
Okay, I deserve that.
352
00:10:24,741 --> 00:10:26,375
Charles, I have cheated
on women in the past
353
00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:28,509
and on this one too.
354
00:10:28,545 --> 00:10:30,045
You got a penchant for blondes.
355
00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:31,547
Hey, come on,
you can't blame a guy
356
00:10:31,548 --> 00:10:33,681
for occasionally dropping anchor
at the cold Commodore Club.
357
00:10:35,685 --> 00:10:37,553
So seriously, Jake,
this is going to be okay?
358
00:10:37,554 --> 00:10:39,053
Oh, yeah.
You're going to be fine.
359
00:10:39,089 --> 00:10:40,623
Yeah.
360
00:10:40,624 --> 00:10:41,624
Oh, my God, Jake.
361
00:10:41,625 --> 00:10:42,925
Who's flying the plane?
362
00:10:42,926 --> 00:10:45,893
Co-pilot, Scully.
Co-pilot.
363
00:10:45,929 --> 00:10:47,563
Okay, look.
364
00:10:47,564 --> 00:10:49,331
Let's try a new approach.
365
00:10:49,332 --> 00:10:51,165
We weigh these three islanders
366
00:10:51,201 --> 00:10:53,502
against these three islanders.
367
00:10:53,503 --> 00:10:54,570
If they weigh the same,
368
00:10:54,571 --> 00:10:55,971
we eliminate them,
369
00:10:55,972 --> 00:10:57,006
and if they don't,
370
00:10:57,007 --> 00:10:59,141
we...
371
00:10:59,142 --> 00:11:00,342
Where'd they go?
372
00:11:00,343 --> 00:11:02,144
Terry's mouth is full of donuts.
373
00:11:02,145 --> 00:11:03,544
You said we could eliminate 'em!
374
00:11:03,580 --> 00:11:05,114
Only if they weigh the same.
375
00:11:05,115 --> 00:11:06,347
We've been here forever.
376
00:11:06,383 --> 00:11:07,548
I'm getting snacky.
377
00:11:07,584 --> 00:11:09,550
Fine.
Let's start over.
378
00:11:09,586 --> 00:11:13,289
Okay, we balance
three against three,
379
00:11:13,290 --> 00:11:15,024
and if they weigh the same,
380
00:11:15,025 --> 00:11:17,259
we just...
381
00:11:17,260 --> 00:11:18,861
What just happened?
382
00:11:18,862 --> 00:11:19,861
Come on, man.
383
00:11:19,863 --> 00:11:21,029
Stop eating the islanders.
384
00:11:21,064 --> 00:11:22,431
I'm saving them
385
00:11:22,432 --> 00:11:24,365
from this weight-obsessed
nightmare island.
386
00:11:24,401 --> 00:11:25,600
By murdering them?
387
00:11:25,635 --> 00:11:27,336
I warned you
against using donuts.
388
00:11:27,337 --> 00:11:29,337
They're my trigger food.
389
00:11:29,372 --> 00:11:30,571
Mmm.
Terry.
390
00:11:30,607 --> 00:11:32,107
These islanders are delicious.
391
00:11:33,977 --> 00:11:36,845
Okay, so two of our suspects
are in the baggage area.
392
00:11:36,846 --> 00:11:38,213
Do you think you can
get us access?
393
00:11:38,214 --> 00:11:40,382
You're with a pilot.
I can get you in anywhere.
394
00:11:40,383 --> 00:11:42,451
Hey, you guys want
a 10% discount
395
00:11:42,452 --> 00:11:44,620
on duty-free maple syrup?
396
00:11:44,621 --> 00:11:45,854
Do I ever!
397
00:11:45,855 --> 00:11:47,323
Roger Peralta.
398
00:11:47,324 --> 00:11:49,325
Roger Peralta...
399
00:11:49,326 --> 00:11:50,326
Hey! What?
400
00:11:50,327 --> 00:11:51,760
Scully, what's going on?
401
00:11:52,896 --> 00:11:54,129
"Roger Peralta is under arrest
402
00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:55,531
for possession
of a controlled substance."
403
00:11:55,532 --> 00:11:57,166
What?
404
00:11:57,167 --> 00:11:58,867
"They found pills
in his apartment."
405
00:11:58,868 --> 00:12:00,269
Jake,
I don't know what he's talking about.
406
00:12:00,270 --> 00:12:02,571
I swear I don't know how
those pills got in my apartment.
407
00:12:02,572 --> 00:12:03,604
Wait.
Jake.
408
00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:04,740
Scully, tell them we're cops.
409
00:12:04,741 --> 00:12:05,741
Tell them!
410
00:12:07,844 --> 00:12:09,445
Shoot.
411
00:12:09,446 --> 00:12:10,446
That means "turnip."
412
00:12:10,447 --> 00:12:11,613
I said we were turnips.
413
00:12:11,614 --> 00:12:12,648
I got it.
Don't worry.
414
00:12:12,649 --> 00:12:14,283
We are turnips!
415
00:12:14,284 --> 00:12:15,883
Nope, that was English.
Yeah.
416
00:12:18,714 --> 00:12:20,414
The cops said your dad's
being held without bail,
417
00:12:20,449 --> 00:12:21,849
they want us
on the next flight out,
418
00:12:21,850 --> 00:12:23,618
and that Bernard's
is the best poutine place
419
00:12:23,619 --> 00:12:24,619
in the airport.
420
00:12:24,620 --> 00:12:25,653
You want some?
421
00:12:25,654 --> 00:12:27,154
No, I don't want poutine
right now.
422
00:12:27,189 --> 00:12:28,188
Yes!
423
00:12:29,825 --> 00:12:32,293
Man, I can't believe they found
pills at my dad's place.
424
00:12:32,294 --> 00:12:33,428
That means none of our suspects
425
00:12:33,429 --> 00:12:34,561
could've possibly done it.
426
00:12:34,596 --> 00:12:36,329
Oh, my God, Boyle.
427
00:12:36,365 --> 00:12:39,232
Is there a chance that my dad
is actually a drug smuggler?
428
00:12:39,268 --> 00:12:40,902
Well, let's look at the facts.
429
00:12:40,903 --> 00:12:43,237
Drugs in his luggage,
drugs in his apartment.
430
00:12:43,238 --> 00:12:45,039
Terrible dad, terrible husband,
431
00:12:45,040 --> 00:12:46,774
cheats on his girlfriend.
432
00:12:46,775 --> 00:12:48,376
I think he did it.
433
00:12:48,377 --> 00:12:49,610
You're right.
434
00:12:49,611 --> 00:12:50,610
He didn't do it.
435
00:12:50,646 --> 00:12:51,646
That's not what I said.
436
00:12:51,647 --> 00:12:53,247
No, you said
he cheats on his girlfriend.
437
00:12:53,248 --> 00:12:55,783
Presumably, he has
to do that with someone,
438
00:12:55,784 --> 00:12:57,218
and that someone
would have access
439
00:12:57,219 --> 00:12:58,785
to his apartment and his bags.
440
00:13:00,088 --> 00:13:02,356
Dad dropped anchor
at the Commodore's Club.
441
00:13:02,357 --> 00:13:03,390
"Someone" is there.
442
00:13:03,425 --> 00:13:04,784
Even so, how do we get in there?
443
00:13:04,793 --> 00:13:06,536
By wearing Dad's pilot uniforms.
444
00:13:06,562 --> 00:13:08,029
No, Jake, I just don't think
he's innocent,
445
00:13:08,030 --> 00:13:09,030
and I just think...
446
00:13:09,031 --> 00:13:10,031
So you don't want to be
my co-pilot?
447
00:13:10,032 --> 00:13:11,666
I'm in!
448
00:13:11,667 --> 00:13:13,868
♪ Going
up to the spirit in the sky ♪
449
00:13:13,869 --> 00:13:15,303
♪ Spirit in the sky ♪
450
00:13:15,304 --> 00:13:17,905
♪ That's where I'm gonna go
when I die ♪
451
00:13:17,906 --> 00:13:19,240
♪ When I die ♪
452
00:13:19,241 --> 00:13:21,551
♪ When I die
and they lay me... ♪
453
00:13:21,577 --> 00:13:22,577
Sorry, Scully.
454
00:13:22,578 --> 00:13:23,803
We only had two uniforms.
455
00:13:23,812 --> 00:13:25,046
It's okay.
456
00:13:25,047 --> 00:13:26,681
For some reason, all the fries
and gravy and cheese
457
00:13:26,682 --> 00:13:27,682
upset my tummy.
458
00:13:27,683 --> 00:13:28,748
Huh.
459
00:13:29,985 --> 00:13:32,386
♪ Going up
to the spirit in the sky ♪
460
00:13:32,387 --> 00:13:33,454
♪ Spirit in the sky ♪
461
00:13:33,455 --> 00:13:34,495
♪ That's where I'm gonna ♪
462
00:13:35,972 --> 00:13:38,774
Are you here because you've
solved my brain teaser?
463
00:13:38,775 --> 00:13:41,709
Sir, you've been an underdog
your whole life.
464
00:13:41,744 --> 00:13:44,779
But you defied the odds
by having others
465
00:13:44,814 --> 00:13:46,582
secretly help you
466
00:13:46,583 --> 00:13:48,182
'cause you didn't have
what it took.
467
00:13:48,217 --> 00:13:49,217
That's not my story.
468
00:13:49,218 --> 00:13:50,351
But now we're the underdogs,
469
00:13:50,386 --> 00:13:52,187
and we're the ones who need
a handout,
470
00:13:52,188 --> 00:13:54,790
so just tell us the answer.
471
00:13:54,791 --> 00:13:56,824
Or have you forgotten
where you come from?
472
00:13:56,859 --> 00:13:58,292
I'm not gonna help you.
473
00:13:58,328 --> 00:14:00,729
I told you
that was not gonna work.
474
00:14:00,730 --> 00:14:01,897
Stop the clock.
475
00:14:01,898 --> 00:14:05,267
We're here,
and we have the solution.
476
00:14:05,268 --> 00:14:07,536
First, you weigh six versus six.
477
00:14:07,537 --> 00:14:09,223
Wrong.
That'll never work.
478
00:14:09,238 --> 00:14:11,840
You just wasted your time
and mine.
479
00:14:11,841 --> 00:14:12,975
Click!
480
00:14:12,976 --> 00:14:14,710
I just captured the exact moment
481
00:14:14,711 --> 00:14:16,712
when you realized
you had failed.
482
00:14:16,713 --> 00:14:17,913
I guess we all got
483
00:14:17,914 --> 00:14:19,047
something out of this.
484
00:14:19,048 --> 00:14:20,148
So that's it?
485
00:14:20,149 --> 00:14:21,483
This problem is
beyond all of you?
486
00:14:21,484 --> 00:14:22,484
No one solved it.
487
00:14:22,485 --> 00:14:23,652
Believe me.
488
00:14:23,653 --> 00:14:25,887
No one is more disappointed
in me than me.
489
00:14:25,888 --> 00:14:29,091
"Than I," Santiago.
490
00:14:29,092 --> 00:14:30,925
Click.
491
00:14:35,898 --> 00:14:37,199
Hi there.
Yeah, that's us.
492
00:14:37,200 --> 00:14:38,200
Home sweet home.
493
00:14:38,201 --> 00:14:39,201
Got dem wings.
494
00:14:39,202 --> 00:14:40,369
Yeah.
495
00:14:40,370 --> 00:14:41,370
Ooh. Okay.
496
00:14:41,371 --> 00:14:43,138
Boom, right there,
behind the bar.
497
00:14:43,139 --> 00:14:44,506
That's my dad's type.
498
00:14:44,507 --> 00:14:46,942
Oh, he likes 'em neat and clean,
real tidy.
499
00:14:46,943 --> 00:14:47,943
What?
500
00:14:47,944 --> 00:14:49,478
No, blondes.
He likes blondes.
501
00:14:49,479 --> 00:14:50,579
All right, here's the plan.
502
00:14:50,580 --> 00:14:51,579
We're gonna go sit down,
503
00:14:51,581 --> 00:14:52,748
order a couple of drinks,
504
00:14:52,749 --> 00:14:54,416
grab her fingerprints
off the glass she serves us,
505
00:14:54,417 --> 00:14:56,218
and then measure her wrist
for handcuff size.
506
00:14:56,219 --> 00:14:57,219
Ready?
Yeah.
507
00:14:57,220 --> 00:14:58,820
Oh, crazy flight.
508
00:14:58,821 --> 00:15:00,122
Oh, those hydraulics were loud.
509
00:15:00,123 --> 00:15:01,690
Yeah.
510
00:15:01,691 --> 00:15:04,092
Ah, bonjour, bonjour.
511
00:15:04,093 --> 00:15:06,261
Two whiskeys, please, Chantelle.
512
00:15:06,262 --> 00:15:07,796
Thanks.
513
00:15:07,797 --> 00:15:09,965
Say, I'm looking
for an old sky pal of mine.
514
00:15:09,966 --> 00:15:11,266
Do you know Roger Peralta?
515
00:15:11,267 --> 00:15:12,934
Yes.
Yes, I do.
516
00:15:12,935 --> 00:15:14,336
How do you guys know Peralta?
517
00:15:14,337 --> 00:15:15,904
Oh, I used to fly with him
back in Oregon.
518
00:15:15,905 --> 00:15:17,239
My name's Captain Spike Masters.
519
00:15:17,240 --> 00:15:18,674
This is my co-pilot Wanda Cohen.
520
00:15:18,675 --> 00:15:19,675
I drive
the plane when he sleeps.
521
00:15:19,676 --> 00:15:22,010
I also take care
of hotel accommodations.
522
00:15:22,011 --> 00:15:23,478
Where'd you guys say
you flew in from?
523
00:15:23,479 --> 00:15:24,546
Akron.
Luxembourg.
524
00:15:24,547 --> 00:15:25,847
Connected in Akron.
525
00:15:25,848 --> 00:15:29,184
Took the old 78... 9er
on the wind stream.
526
00:15:29,185 --> 00:15:30,719
You know, flight stuff.
527
00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:31,720
Anyhow...
528
00:15:32,722 --> 00:15:34,256
Can we grab those two whiskeys,
please?
529
00:15:34,257 --> 00:15:35,290
I do not know who you are,
530
00:15:35,291 --> 00:15:36,591
and I do not think
you are pilots.
531
00:15:36,592 --> 00:15:38,160
Your suit doesn't even fit.
532
00:15:38,161 --> 00:15:39,494
Ah.
533
00:15:39,495 --> 00:15:40,696
I had my stomach stapled.
534
00:15:40,697 --> 00:15:42,564
Sécurité! Sécurité!
535
00:15:44,567 --> 00:15:46,568
Ah!
Unhand us.
536
00:15:46,569 --> 00:15:47,869
This is outrageous.
537
00:15:47,870 --> 00:15:49,838
I demand to speak
with the commodore himself.
538
00:15:49,839 --> 00:15:52,107
There's no way
we'll get her fingerprints now.
539
00:15:52,108 --> 00:15:53,909
Oh, really?
540
00:15:53,910 --> 00:15:54,910
Voilà.
541
00:15:54,911 --> 00:15:56,078
French.
542
00:15:56,079 --> 00:15:57,713
She cleaned the bar
quite thoroughly,
543
00:15:57,714 --> 00:16:00,215
but this bottle is filthy
with her prints.
544
00:16:00,216 --> 00:16:01,216
Smurt.
545
00:16:01,217 --> 00:16:02,317
That's why you're the pilot,
546
00:16:02,318 --> 00:16:03,318
and I'm the co-pilot.
547
00:16:03,319 --> 00:16:05,087
Copy that, Wanda.
548
00:16:05,088 --> 00:16:06,788
Copy that.
549
00:16:06,789 --> 00:16:08,223
Wanda Cohen.
550
00:16:08,224 --> 00:16:10,459
Wait, Captain.
551
00:16:10,460 --> 00:16:12,327
Gina and I figured out
your dumb brain teaser.
552
00:16:12,328 --> 00:16:13,495
I highly doubt that, sir.
553
00:16:13,496 --> 00:16:14,830
I'll judge for myself, Santiago.
554
00:16:14,831 --> 00:16:15,997
Okay, Diaz.
555
00:16:15,998 --> 00:16:17,399
What's the solution?
556
00:16:17,400 --> 00:16:18,400
We have no idea.
557
00:16:18,401 --> 00:16:19,401
Ha!
Told ya.
558
00:16:19,402 --> 00:16:20,669
But neither do you, sir.
559
00:16:20,670 --> 00:16:21,670
What?
560
00:16:21,671 --> 00:16:22,671
Captain Holt,
561
00:16:22,672 --> 00:16:23,939
you don't know
what the solution is.
562
00:16:23,940 --> 00:16:25,173
Excuse me?
563
00:16:25,174 --> 00:16:26,475
Here's how we cracked it.
564
00:16:26,476 --> 00:16:29,177
I took the photo of you
demolishing Amy's spirit
565
00:16:29,178 --> 00:16:33,248
and made these clever T-shirts
that say, "#nerdfail."
566
00:16:33,249 --> 00:16:34,583
It's not that clever.
567
00:16:34,584 --> 00:16:35,884
It's hilarious.
568
00:16:35,885 --> 00:16:37,152
Look at this.
569
00:16:37,153 --> 00:16:40,522
Your expression
is the same as Amy's
570
00:16:40,523 --> 00:16:41,890
because you're both devastated
571
00:16:41,891 --> 00:16:43,258
that you just
let down your mentors.
572
00:16:43,259 --> 00:16:44,793
I looked at your calendar.
573
00:16:44,794 --> 00:16:47,129
You're supposed to have
breakfast with your old c.o.
574
00:16:47,130 --> 00:16:49,231
You wanted us to solve
the problem before you saw him.
575
00:16:49,232 --> 00:16:50,766
That's crazy.
576
00:16:50,767 --> 00:16:51,767
She's right.
577
00:16:51,768 --> 00:16:52,934
What?
No.
578
00:16:52,935 --> 00:16:55,804
He posed that problem to me
20 years ago.
579
00:16:55,805 --> 00:16:57,105
Every time I see him, he asks,
580
00:16:57,106 --> 00:16:58,206
"Do you have the answer yet?"
581
00:16:58,207 --> 00:16:59,374
And I never have.
582
00:16:59,375 --> 00:17:02,077
Those islanders
and their pathetic seesaw
583
00:17:02,078 --> 00:17:03,411
haunt my dreams.
584
00:17:03,412 --> 00:17:05,213
They mock me in my sleep,
585
00:17:05,214 --> 00:17:09,618
riding up and down
on a teeter-totter of taunts.
586
00:17:09,619 --> 00:17:10,619
Cool.
587
00:17:10,620 --> 00:17:12,653
So who gets the Beyoncé tickets?
588
00:17:14,423 --> 00:17:17,592
♪ O Canada ♪
589
00:17:17,593 --> 00:17:21,530
♪ You home of crappy cops ♪
590
00:17:21,531 --> 00:17:23,565
Guess who just freed his dad
from Canadian prison
591
00:17:23,566 --> 00:17:25,267
and slammed six free mimosas
592
00:17:25,268 --> 00:17:26,802
on the first-class flight home
593
00:17:26,803 --> 00:17:28,470
sans the juice?
594
00:17:28,471 --> 00:17:29,571
Spoiler alert, it was Jake.
595
00:17:29,572 --> 00:17:30,572
It was me.
596
00:17:30,573 --> 00:17:31,907
So turns out
597
00:17:31,908 --> 00:17:33,141
my dad's sidepiece framed him.
598
00:17:33,142 --> 00:17:34,342
She was hella pissed
599
00:17:34,343 --> 00:17:36,311
'cause she found out
about his real girlfriend
600
00:17:36,312 --> 00:17:37,445
and his other sidepiece.
601
00:17:37,446 --> 00:17:39,447
So yeah.
602
00:17:39,448 --> 00:17:41,349
Turns out my dad
is a great guy after all.
603
00:17:41,350 --> 00:17:42,984
And in celebration
of my freedom,
604
00:17:42,985 --> 00:17:44,786
I'm taking
everybody out tonight.
605
00:17:44,787 --> 00:17:45,787
Drinks are on me.
606
00:17:45,788 --> 00:17:47,989
Eh?
607
00:17:47,990 --> 00:17:49,357
Where's Scully?
608
00:17:49,358 --> 00:17:50,592
Scully.
Oh, no.
609
00:17:50,593 --> 00:17:51,592
Who?
610
00:17:55,798 --> 00:17:56,798
Hey, Hank.
611
00:17:56,799 --> 00:17:57,966
When you see my dad walk in,
612
00:17:57,967 --> 00:17:59,067
can you dim the lights
613
00:17:59,068 --> 00:18:00,101
and play We Are the Champions?
614
00:18:00,102 --> 00:18:01,269
No.
615
00:18:01,270 --> 00:18:02,404
I don't know
what your dad looks like,
616
00:18:02,405 --> 00:18:03,505
I don't have the song...
617
00:18:03,506 --> 00:18:04,840
And the lights
aren't on dimmers.
618
00:18:04,841 --> 00:18:06,208
Oh, no.
It's okay, Jake.
619
00:18:06,209 --> 00:18:08,176
You give me the signal,
I'll start unscrewing bulbs.
620
00:18:08,177 --> 00:18:10,378
No, my dad just texted.
621
00:18:10,379 --> 00:18:11,746
He's not coming.
622
00:18:11,747 --> 00:18:13,515
To Jake's dad!
623
00:18:16,352 --> 00:18:17,585
Yep.
624
00:18:19,398 --> 00:18:20,565
Sorry, Jake.
625
00:18:20,566 --> 00:18:21,699
I'm sure your dad has
a really good reason
626
00:18:21,700 --> 00:18:22,700
for not being here.
627
00:18:22,701 --> 00:18:24,435
No, don't do that, all right?
628
00:18:24,436 --> 00:18:25,536
Don't let him off the hook.
629
00:18:25,537 --> 00:18:26,971
That's what I've done
my whole life.
630
00:18:26,972 --> 00:18:28,840
You know, when he missed
my 11th birthday,
631
00:18:28,841 --> 00:18:32,677
I blamed myself for being born
on a peak travel day.
632
00:18:32,678 --> 00:18:34,412
You were right about him, Boyle.
633
00:18:34,413 --> 00:18:35,980
So what do we do now?
634
00:18:35,981 --> 00:18:37,381
Hug for ten minutes.
635
00:18:37,382 --> 00:18:38,548
No, give me a rain check
on the hug.
636
00:18:38,584 --> 00:18:40,318
There's something I got to do.
637
00:18:40,319 --> 00:18:42,253
You can have my beer.
Cool.
638
00:18:44,723 --> 00:18:46,390
Jake.
639
00:18:46,391 --> 00:18:48,092
I'm sorry I couldn't make it
to the party.
640
00:18:48,093 --> 00:18:51,329
I'm subbing for a buddy
who's got an early flight.
641
00:18:51,330 --> 00:18:52,463
I'm sure you're upset.
642
00:18:52,464 --> 00:18:54,298
No, actually,
I'm not upset at all.
643
00:18:54,299 --> 00:18:55,299
Yeah?
644
00:18:55,300 --> 00:18:56,300
Great.
645
00:18:56,301 --> 00:18:57,769
No, more relieved.
646
00:18:57,770 --> 00:19:00,071
You know,
you were always my hero,
647
00:19:00,072 --> 00:19:01,773
but I think I'm finally
starting to see you
648
00:19:01,774 --> 00:19:02,807
for who you really are:
649
00:19:02,808 --> 00:19:04,509
A regional airline pilot
650
00:19:04,510 --> 00:19:05,943
whose landings are bumpy as hell
651
00:19:05,944 --> 00:19:07,211
and a pretty selfish guy
652
00:19:07,212 --> 00:19:09,280
who genuinely doesn't care
about being a dad.
653
00:19:09,281 --> 00:19:12,583
Jake, you don't understand.
654
00:19:12,584 --> 00:19:14,952
There was a downdraft
on the Drummondville runway.
655
00:19:14,953 --> 00:19:16,654
Oh, wow.
656
00:19:16,655 --> 00:19:17,655
It's not my fault.
657
00:19:17,656 --> 00:19:19,157
Yeah, clearly.
658
00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:22,593
Look, I've been making excuses
for you my whole life,
659
00:19:22,594 --> 00:19:24,695
but you're
a pretty crappy father,
660
00:19:24,696 --> 00:19:26,898
and until you're ready
to be a good one,
661
00:19:26,899 --> 00:19:29,133
don't call me.
662
00:19:29,134 --> 00:19:30,568
Also I'm taking your captain hat
663
00:19:30,569 --> 00:19:33,336
because it's cool,
and I want it.
664
00:19:33,372 --> 00:19:36,173
♪ Going
up to the spirit in the sky ♪
665
00:19:36,208 --> 00:19:37,642
♪ Spirit in the sky ♪
666
00:19:37,643 --> 00:19:40,144
♪ That's where I'm gonna go
when I die ♪
667
00:19:40,145 --> 00:19:41,512
I got to say,
668
00:19:41,513 --> 00:19:43,281
figuring out Captain Holt
didn't know the answer
669
00:19:43,282 --> 00:19:44,448
was an incredible solve.
670
00:19:44,449 --> 00:19:46,117
I'm sorry if we implied
you weren't smart.
671
00:19:46,118 --> 00:19:48,286
Oh, and I'm sorry if we implied
672
00:19:48,287 --> 00:19:49,887
you're both asexual nerds
673
00:19:49,888 --> 00:19:52,323
who can only be friends
with service animals.
674
00:19:52,324 --> 00:19:53,324
You didn't.
675
00:19:53,325 --> 00:19:54,458
Not to your face,
676
00:19:54,459 --> 00:19:55,993
but to a ton of people
behind your back.
677
00:19:55,994 --> 00:19:56,993
Thanks for the drink.
678
00:19:56,995 --> 00:19:58,663
Yes.
679
00:19:58,664 --> 00:19:59,764
Next round's on me.
680
00:19:59,765 --> 00:20:00,898
It's the least I can do
681
00:20:00,899 --> 00:20:03,701
for teasing your brains
so mercilessly.
682
00:20:03,702 --> 00:20:05,636
So what are you gonna say
to your old c.o. tomorrow
683
00:20:05,637 --> 00:20:07,238
when he asks
if you've solved the puzzle?
684
00:20:07,239 --> 00:20:08,239
I don't know.
685
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:09,607
Thanks for bringing that up.
686
00:20:09,608 --> 00:20:11,008
Fun chat.
687
00:20:11,009 --> 00:20:12,643
Just say
you're a captain now,
688
00:20:12,644 --> 00:20:13,845
and you're busy
running a precinct,
689
00:20:13,846 --> 00:20:15,813
so he can go suck an egg.
690
00:20:15,814 --> 00:20:17,181
Or we can all work together
691
00:20:17,182 --> 00:20:18,482
all night long,
692
00:20:18,483 --> 00:20:20,251
and I'm sure we can
eventually figure it out.
693
00:20:20,252 --> 00:20:22,687
I like that, Terry.
It shows real heart.
694
00:20:22,688 --> 00:20:25,222
But I'm going with Gina's
"suck an egg" idea.
695
00:20:25,257 --> 00:20:28,259
You get the Beyoncé tickets.
696
00:20:28,260 --> 00:20:30,428
Oh-ho-ho-ho!
697
00:20:30,429 --> 00:20:31,828
Of course I do.
698
00:20:31,864 --> 00:20:32,897
I told you.
699
00:20:32,898 --> 00:20:35,899
It was my birthright,
you bitches.
700
00:20:38,904 --> 00:20:40,872
Superglue your panties
to your butts, ladies,
701
00:20:40,873 --> 00:20:43,741
because Jake is in the house!
702
00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:45,009
What?
703
00:20:45,010 --> 00:20:46,010
Never mind.
704
00:20:46,011 --> 00:20:47,011
I'm a little drunk.
Ah.
705
00:20:47,012 --> 00:20:48,779
I'm also worried about you.
706
00:20:48,780 --> 00:20:50,181
Come here.
Ten-minute hug time.
707
00:20:50,182 --> 00:20:51,182
I'd rather not.
708
00:20:51,183 --> 00:20:53,483
Come on.
Okay.
709
00:20:53,518 --> 00:20:55,318
Boyle, release him.
710
00:20:55,354 --> 00:20:57,555
Fine, only because
you're ordering me to.
711
00:20:57,556 --> 00:20:59,090
There's nine minutes left
on that hug.
712
00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:00,391
Great.
713
00:21:00,392 --> 00:21:01,959
Heh.
714
00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:03,361
Nice job in Quebec.
715
00:21:03,362 --> 00:21:05,830
I bet the local cops weren't
happy you showed them up.
716
00:21:05,831 --> 00:21:07,164
Yeah, well, maybe not at first.
717
00:21:07,165 --> 00:21:10,001
But by the end, they kept
calling me a real bâtard,
718
00:21:10,002 --> 00:21:11,702
which I can only assume
means "hero."
719
00:21:11,703 --> 00:21:12,937
It means "bastard,"
720
00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:14,639
but that's only
because they were jealous.
721
00:21:14,640 --> 00:21:15,806
You did good work.
722
00:21:15,807 --> 00:21:16,807
Here.
723
00:21:16,808 --> 00:21:18,242
Is this an allowance?
724
00:21:18,243 --> 00:21:19,477
Are you giving me an allowance?
725
00:21:19,478 --> 00:21:21,412
No, I'm paying the bartender
for more drinks.
726
00:21:21,413 --> 00:21:22,545
Oh, right.
727
00:21:23,815 --> 00:21:24,814
I'm proud of you.
728
00:21:27,753 --> 00:21:29,386
Nine minutes start now!
729
00:21:29,387 --> 00:21:33,390
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.addic7ed.com/