1 00:00:00,707 --> 00:00:02,515 Peralta, looks like an old friend of yours 2 00:00:02,601 --> 00:00:04,037 - is back in town. - Who? 3 00:00:04,123 --> 00:00:06,211 That guy Neil that you bunked with at sleepaway camp? 4 00:00:06,296 --> 00:00:07,944 Oh, Neil from camp was the best. 5 00:00:08,029 --> 00:00:09,966 He could pick up a milk carton with his butt cheeks. 6 00:00:10,052 --> 00:00:11,083 He was so funny. 7 00:00:11,169 --> 00:00:13,148 You know who else was funny? Bill Cosby. 8 00:00:13,273 --> 00:00:15,468 Charles, will you relax? You're gonna love Neil. 9 00:00:15,554 --> 00:00:16,968 It's not Neil. Why would it be Neil? 10 00:00:17,054 --> 00:00:19,085 - Doug Judy. - Oh, right. 11 00:00:19,170 --> 00:00:20,913 Someone we all know in a police capacity. 12 00:00:20,999 --> 00:00:21,999 That makes more sense. 13 00:00:22,093 --> 00:00:24,351 Someone's using his signature move to steal cars, 14 00:00:24,437 --> 00:00:25,962 plugging in to the OBD port 15 00:00:26,047 --> 00:00:27,877 and reprogramming the immobilizer module. 16 00:00:27,962 --> 00:00:29,414 That's Doug Judy's MO, but it's not him. 17 00:00:29,499 --> 00:00:31,094 - He told me he went legit. - That's what he told you 18 00:00:31,179 --> 00:00:33,046 last time too, before he screwed you over. 19 00:00:33,132 --> 00:00:34,852 Yeah, but he returned the diamonds to me eventually, 20 00:00:34,937 --> 00:00:36,147 and it turned out that was the only way 21 00:00:36,233 --> 00:00:37,444 to get Giggle Pig off the streets. 22 00:00:37,554 --> 00:00:38,921 Wait, I may be confusing our adventures. 23 00:00:39,006 --> 00:00:39,913 What year was the cruise? 24 00:00:39,999 --> 00:00:41,687 Dude's a criminal. People don't change. 25 00:00:41,773 --> 00:00:43,610 Ever heard of Bruce Banner, the Incredible Hulk? 26 00:00:43,695 --> 00:00:44,914 You might want to talk to his shirts and pants 27 00:00:44,999 --> 00:00:46,718 about people not changing. 28 00:00:47,257 --> 00:00:49,648 Well, I want to ask Doug Judy some questions. 29 00:00:49,734 --> 00:00:52,205 - You have his number? - I always make contact through his mom. 30 00:00:52,290 --> 00:00:53,860 I'll put you in touch with her, but remember, 31 00:00:53,945 --> 00:00:56,132 she thinks I'm his assistant Mangy Carl, 32 00:00:56,273 --> 00:00:58,093 and he's a famous architect who's designing 33 00:00:58,179 --> 00:01:00,530 LeBron James' new school for black astronauts. 34 00:01:01,442 --> 00:01:03,515 Hello, Mrs. Judy? 35 00:01:03,935 --> 00:01:06,069 I'm looking for your son, the architect. 36 00:01:06,155 --> 00:01:08,702 Yes, I'm from... black NASA. 37 00:01:08,788 --> 00:01:09,773 Is that a thing? 38 00:01:09,859 --> 00:01:12,008 Oh, my. I didn't know. 39 00:01:12,093 --> 00:01:14,195 I understand. Good-bye. 40 00:01:15,028 --> 00:01:17,991 So Doug Judy will not be coming in. 41 00:01:18,142 --> 00:01:19,171 What? Why not? 42 00:01:19,257 --> 00:01:20,930 Oh, I see. 43 00:01:21,116 --> 00:01:22,523 He is dead. 44 00:01:23,191 --> 00:01:25,554 *BROOKLYN NINE-NINE* Season 06 Episode 05 45 00:01:25,936 --> 00:01:28,476 Episode Title : "A Tale of Two Bandits" 46 00:01:38,444 --> 00:01:41,464 Synchronized by srjanapala 47 00:01:42,514 --> 00:01:45,351 Wow, I don't know how to deal with all these emotions, Terry. 48 00:01:45,468 --> 00:01:47,260 No one I've been close with has ever died before. 49 00:01:47,345 --> 00:01:50,296 No tragic accidents to friends. All my grandparents are alive. 50 00:01:50,382 --> 00:01:51,796 How did you deal when Hodor died? 51 00:01:51,882 --> 00:01:54,224 Not well, Terry. Why would you bring that up? 52 00:01:54,309 --> 00:01:56,443 Carl? Mangy Carl? 53 00:01:56,528 --> 00:01:58,532 Yes. That is me. 54 00:01:58,617 --> 00:02:00,578 I'm Trudy Judy, Doug's sister. 55 00:02:00,663 --> 00:02:02,145 This is our aunt Patrice. 56 00:02:02,230 --> 00:02:03,684 I'm so glad you could make it. 57 00:02:03,770 --> 00:02:05,223 Doug really loved you. 58 00:02:05,309 --> 00:02:08,281 - Oh, he talked about me? - Oh, all the time. 59 00:02:08,366 --> 00:02:11,106 He was so afraid he'd fall back into your old life. 60 00:02:11,192 --> 00:02:13,082 Doug made Mangy Carl an assistant 61 00:02:13,176 --> 00:02:14,374 at the architecture firm. 62 00:02:14,459 --> 00:02:16,420 He rescued him from a life on the streets. 63 00:02:16,505 --> 00:02:19,215 Yeah, I was down on my luck, not a penny to my name. 64 00:02:19,301 --> 00:02:20,716 You were selling your body for money. 65 00:02:20,801 --> 00:02:22,997 - Did Doug tell you that? - He said all your teeth fell out, 66 00:02:23,082 --> 00:02:24,645 and your mouth was just a rotten hole. 67 00:02:25,012 --> 00:02:26,285 100% accurate. 68 00:02:26,371 --> 00:02:28,653 Plus you were sick from those back-alley butt implants. 69 00:02:28,793 --> 00:02:30,770 - Had to have 'em. - Carl thought a plumper rump 70 00:02:30,856 --> 00:02:32,887 would help him get his **** every night. 71 00:02:32,973 --> 00:02:34,606 Yeah, I remember having that thought. 72 00:02:34,692 --> 00:02:36,701 But the doctor just put a bunch of mulch up there, 73 00:02:36,786 --> 00:02:38,746 - and it got all infected. - Dark days. 74 00:02:38,831 --> 00:02:42,233 I'm sorry. It's just so sweet. 75 00:02:42,319 --> 00:02:44,639 - The mulch thing? - No, how Doug saved him. 76 00:02:44,837 --> 00:02:47,755 Doug was always taking people under his wing. 77 00:02:47,840 --> 00:02:50,014 Doug said you have a beautiful voice. 78 00:02:50,100 --> 00:02:51,407 Oh, he did? Well, I... 79 00:02:51,582 --> 00:02:53,436 ♪ Suppose that's true ♪ 80 00:02:53,522 --> 00:02:55,241 Would you want to sing a song for us? 81 00:02:55,326 --> 00:02:57,108 What a nice thought, but you know what, 82 00:02:57,194 --> 00:02:58,498 I don't have anything prepared. 83 00:02:58,584 --> 00:02:59,945 Okay, well, if you don't want to sing, 84 00:03:00,030 --> 00:03:01,717 you could just tell us the inspiring story 85 00:03:01,803 --> 00:03:04,397 of how Doug saved you from being a mulch-butt ho. 86 00:03:04,483 --> 00:03:07,420 I would like to sing a song in honor of my dear friend 87 00:03:07,506 --> 00:03:08,717 Doug Judy. 88 00:03:08,818 --> 00:03:11,100 Oh, nothing better after a long shift 89 00:03:11,186 --> 00:03:12,389 than coming to Shaw's. 90 00:03:12,474 --> 00:03:14,631 It's like Cheers, where everybody knows your name. 91 00:03:14,717 --> 00:03:16,088 A place where everybody knows your name is hell. 92 00:03:16,173 --> 00:03:18,482 - You're describing hell. - Guys, guys, guys. 93 00:03:18,567 --> 00:03:19,787 Are those... 94 00:03:19,872 --> 00:03:21,224 - Firefighters. - Firefighters. - Firefighters. 95 00:03:21,309 --> 00:03:22,529 Hey, what's going on? 96 00:03:22,614 --> 00:03:24,412 Why is the FDNY in our cop bar? 97 00:03:24,498 --> 00:03:25,532 We needed a new place, 98 00:03:25,617 --> 00:03:27,447 since our bar, O'Brien's, burned down. 99 00:03:27,532 --> 00:03:29,188 - You couldn't put that out? - They probably started it. 100 00:03:29,273 --> 00:03:31,060 Most arsonists turn out to be firefighters. 101 00:03:31,145 --> 00:03:33,062 That's not true, though it is very common, 102 00:03:33,147 --> 00:03:34,498 and definitely what happened in this case. 103 00:03:34,583 --> 00:03:36,031 I'm surprised you guys even want to come here 104 00:03:36,116 --> 00:03:37,283 since you have to take the stairs. 105 00:03:37,368 --> 00:03:39,061 I know how much you like sliding on poles. 106 00:03:39,147 --> 00:03:40,709 We don't like sliding on poles. 107 00:03:40,795 --> 00:03:42,764 We do it to save lives. It's dangerous. 108 00:03:42,850 --> 00:03:44,160 You can ask my best friend Steve. 109 00:03:44,245 --> 00:03:46,287 Oh, no, wait, you can't, actually, 110 00:03:46,373 --> 00:03:47,598 because he's dead. 111 00:03:47,683 --> 00:03:49,428 Tripped through a pole hole, broke his neck. 112 00:03:49,514 --> 00:03:50,601 That's horrible. 113 00:03:50,686 --> 00:03:52,516 Sorry, but this is a firefighter bar now. 114 00:03:52,601 --> 00:03:54,692 Although we might want to make some changes to the decor. 115 00:03:54,777 --> 00:03:56,650 I'm thinking some old-timey pressure gauges, 116 00:03:56,735 --> 00:03:58,043 maybe an autographed photo 117 00:03:58,128 --> 00:03:59,803 of Denis Leary from "Rescue Me." 118 00:03:59,936 --> 00:04:01,850 - You wouldn't. - Wouldn't I? 119 00:04:02,029 --> 00:04:03,075 Check it out. 120 00:04:03,183 --> 00:04:04,883 You son of a bitch. 121 00:04:05,031 --> 00:04:07,457 ♪ Doug Judy ♪ 122 00:04:07,543 --> 00:04:12,013 ♪ I wish you were alive, Doug Judy ♪ 123 00:04:12,171 --> 00:04:15,567 ♪ God will give you a high five ♪ 124 00:04:15,753 --> 00:04:17,701 ♪ Doug Judy ♪ 125 00:04:17,787 --> 00:04:19,456 Oh, no, he gave himself a key change. 126 00:04:19,541 --> 00:04:22,850 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, Doug Judy ♪ 127 00:04:23,022 --> 00:04:25,636 ♪ You're a friend, friend, friend ♪ 128 00:04:25,721 --> 00:04:28,204 ♪ Doug Judy! 129 00:04:28,289 --> 00:04:33,373 ♪ This song is at its end ♪ 130 00:04:33,555 --> 00:04:35,080 Thank you so much. You've been a great audience. 131 00:04:35,165 --> 00:04:37,037 I mean, it's a funeral. That's psychotic. 132 00:04:37,123 --> 00:04:38,436 I'm so sorry. 133 00:04:38,821 --> 00:04:40,498 Why are there firefighters here? 134 00:04:40,592 --> 00:04:42,023 Did one of them turn out to be an arsonist 135 00:04:42,108 --> 00:04:43,523 - and burn down their own bar? - Actually, yes. 136 00:04:43,608 --> 00:04:45,209 So predictable. But why did you call me? 137 00:04:45,295 --> 00:04:46,248 There's nothing I can do about this. 138 00:04:46,334 --> 00:04:48,069 You have gravitas. Everyone listens to you. 139 00:04:48,155 --> 00:04:49,920 Look, even if I could save Shaw's, 140 00:04:50,006 --> 00:04:51,014 I'm not sure I'd want to. 141 00:04:51,100 --> 00:04:52,750 This place is a hovel. 142 00:04:52,835 --> 00:04:55,491 The only wine they serve is from the Delaware Water Gap. 143 00:04:55,577 --> 00:04:56,754 It's called "Charbonnay." 144 00:04:56,839 --> 00:04:59,209 But this is our bar, and it has been forever. 145 00:04:59,295 --> 00:05:00,108 Change is a good thing. 146 00:05:00,194 --> 00:05:01,452 Just yesterday, you were ranting 147 00:05:01,538 --> 00:05:03,369 about the Philharmonic adding a second piccolo. 148 00:05:03,454 --> 00:05:04,975 It's too many. It'll muddle the sound. 149 00:05:05,061 --> 00:05:05,967 I'm sorry I brought it up. 150 00:05:06,053 --> 00:05:07,803 Look, we can find a new bar 151 00:05:07,889 --> 00:05:09,405 that's not beneath us. 152 00:05:09,491 --> 00:05:10,624 What about Bel Vino? 153 00:05:10,710 --> 00:05:12,411 They've got a great selection of Italian reds, 154 00:05:12,496 --> 00:05:14,295 and your feet don't stick to the floor 155 00:05:14,381 --> 00:05:15,425 if you stand in one place too long. 156 00:05:15,510 --> 00:05:17,522 Fine. If you're not gonna do anything, then I will. 157 00:05:17,686 --> 00:05:19,507 Hank, you got to get rid of these hose humpers. 158 00:05:19,592 --> 00:05:20,430 - It's them or us. - Look, guys, 159 00:05:20,515 --> 00:05:21,827 I don't want to take sides. 160 00:05:21,913 --> 00:05:22,937 I just want to make money. 161 00:05:23,022 --> 00:05:25,100 Then keep it a cop bar. We drink like crazy. 162 00:05:25,186 --> 00:05:27,436 Yeah, 'cause of all the tragedy we experience 163 00:05:27,522 --> 00:05:29,178 on a daily basis, son. 164 00:05:29,263 --> 00:05:32,022 Oh, yeah? We experience plenty of tragedy too. 165 00:05:32,177 --> 00:05:34,163 We lose a man a year to the pole hole. 166 00:05:34,420 --> 00:05:35,553 How about this? 167 00:05:35,639 --> 00:05:38,448 If it's about money, let's just have a drink-off. 168 00:05:38,631 --> 00:05:40,711 Whoever racks up the biggest tab by closing time 169 00:05:40,796 --> 00:05:42,191 gets to keep Shaw's. 170 00:05:42,276 --> 00:05:43,827 Okay, defectives. 171 00:05:45,885 --> 00:05:48,718 - My guys can handle that. - Oh, can they? 172 00:05:48,804 --> 00:05:51,211 'Cause the Nine-Nine's about to bring the real heat. 173 00:05:51,297 --> 00:05:54,984 Get ready for the back draft, bitch. 174 00:05:55,133 --> 00:05:56,930 Jake, are you upset? Where are you going? 175 00:05:57,016 --> 00:05:58,337 Are you embarrassed about your singing? 176 00:05:58,422 --> 00:06:00,063 - Doug Judy. - What? 177 00:06:00,149 --> 00:06:03,603 Hey, Jake. Man, that song was moving AF. 178 00:06:03,688 --> 00:06:05,344 We got to lay that down. 179 00:06:05,429 --> 00:06:08,070 ♪ Doug Judy, he's smushing on the beach ♪ 180 00:06:08,156 --> 00:06:09,828 Don't try and duet with me, you bastard. 181 00:06:09,914 --> 00:06:11,445 You tricked me. Now give me a hug. 182 00:06:11,531 --> 00:06:12,923 I'm so happy you're alive. I'll never forgive you. 183 00:06:13,008 --> 00:06:14,266 You're my best friend. 184 00:06:14,351 --> 00:06:15,946 Whoo, I just went through a lot of emotions real fast, 185 00:06:16,031 --> 00:06:17,313 but I think I'm back to normal now. 186 00:06:17,398 --> 00:06:19,184 - Should we get lunch? - I would love a cheesesteak. 187 00:06:19,269 --> 00:06:21,032 I was thinking the exact same thing, probably 'cause... 188 00:06:21,117 --> 00:06:22,610 - The coffin looks like a hoagie roll. - The coffin looks like a hoagie roll. 189 00:06:22,695 --> 00:06:24,203 Judy, what the hell is going on? 190 00:06:24,289 --> 00:06:26,094 Uh, who are you, and where is Rosa? 191 00:06:26,180 --> 00:06:27,801 I'm his boss, and I want answers. 192 00:06:27,886 --> 00:06:29,238 All right. You know who Stefano Lucas is? 193 00:06:29,323 --> 00:06:30,588 The arms dealer? 194 00:06:30,674 --> 00:06:32,986 I got word he put a hit out on me, so I had to disappear. 195 00:06:33,072 --> 00:06:34,916 Why does Stefano Lucas want you dead? 196 00:06:35,002 --> 00:06:36,288 His favorite Ferrari got stolen, 197 00:06:36,373 --> 00:06:37,855 and for some reason he thinks I did it. 198 00:06:37,940 --> 00:06:39,432 Probably because someone's been jacking cars 199 00:06:39,517 --> 00:06:40,947 all over Brooklyn using your MO. 200 00:06:41,033 --> 00:06:42,330 Oh, my God. Jake, are you saying 201 00:06:42,416 --> 00:06:43,714 what I think you're saying? - Yes. 202 00:06:43,799 --> 00:06:45,580 You have a copycat. 203 00:06:45,817 --> 00:06:47,823 I didn't think I'd accomplished enough in my career for this. 204 00:06:47,908 --> 00:06:48,955 I know, it's big. 205 00:06:49,041 --> 00:06:50,824 It just feels so good to be seen, you know? 206 00:06:50,909 --> 00:06:52,955 Wait. The only way to catch a copycat 207 00:06:53,041 --> 00:06:55,150 is to team up with the original criminal. 208 00:06:55,236 --> 00:06:56,955 I'm back on the force! Give me a gun. 209 00:06:57,041 --> 00:06:59,400 No! There is no copycat. You did it. 210 00:06:59,486 --> 00:07:01,270 Not me. I'm living that straight life. 211 00:07:01,355 --> 00:07:03,534 Terry refuses to believe it. He thinks people can't change. 212 00:07:03,619 --> 00:07:05,167 Tell that to Bruce Banner's pants and shirt. 213 00:07:05,252 --> 00:07:06,259 That's what I said. 214 00:07:06,345 --> 00:07:07,650 Doug Judy, you're under arrest. 215 00:07:07,736 --> 00:07:09,424 What? Sarge? 216 00:07:10,334 --> 00:07:13,236 You are really bringing down the vibe at this funeral. 217 00:07:14,236 --> 00:07:15,321 What the hell is that? 218 00:07:15,401 --> 00:07:16,799 Jake got me this disguise 219 00:07:16,885 --> 00:07:19,259 so some criminal doesn't see me in here and tell Stefano. 220 00:07:19,345 --> 00:07:21,330 Okay, but why is Jake also wearing them? 221 00:07:21,416 --> 00:07:23,783 Uh, because it looks super cool, Sarge. 222 00:07:23,869 --> 00:07:26,306 We look like the hot twins from "The Matrix." 223 00:07:28,049 --> 00:07:29,322 We are getting aggravated. 224 00:07:29,408 --> 00:07:31,229 - You look like Milli Vanilli. - Ooh! I call Vanilli. 225 00:07:31,314 --> 00:07:33,080 Ah, I want to be Nilli, but you got it. 226 00:07:33,166 --> 00:07:34,534 - He's the best one. - You know it's true. 227 00:07:34,619 --> 00:07:36,181 So did you check out Judy's alibi? 228 00:07:36,267 --> 00:07:38,847 Yes, and surprisingly, it checks out. 229 00:07:38,933 --> 00:07:41,119 Last Saturday night, Doug was deejaying. 230 00:07:41,205 --> 00:07:42,798 Joshy Greenbaum's bar mitzvah. 231 00:07:42,884 --> 00:07:44,166 That was a wild party. 232 00:07:44,252 --> 00:07:45,821 Auntie Karen is a freak. 233 00:07:45,907 --> 00:07:47,302 Judy, you deejay bar mitzvahs? 234 00:07:47,388 --> 00:07:49,243 Best gig I ever had. No one likes hip-hop more 235 00:07:49,329 --> 00:07:50,550 than a 13-year-old Jewish boy. 236 00:07:50,635 --> 00:07:52,884 - Mm. So true. - I'm not buying it. 237 00:07:52,970 --> 00:07:54,598 Probably stealing cash off the gift table. 238 00:07:54,683 --> 00:07:56,643 Sarge, come on. He has an alibi. 239 00:07:56,728 --> 00:07:58,884 Let's just team up and try and catch the copycat. 240 00:07:58,994 --> 00:08:00,291 A thousand push-ups. 241 00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:01,768 It's something Rosa and I used to say. 242 00:08:01,853 --> 00:08:03,563 It just means trust me. If Judy's a criminal, 243 00:08:03,648 --> 00:08:05,784 I'll do a thousand push-ups, and since you're so confident, 244 00:08:05,869 --> 00:08:07,306 if you're wrong, you can do 'em. 245 00:08:07,391 --> 00:08:09,090 And a thousand push-ups? That's a lot to you? 246 00:08:09,175 --> 00:08:10,440 You go to hell, Terry. 247 00:08:10,525 --> 00:08:12,017 Make it 100,000 push-ups, and I'm in. 248 00:08:12,103 --> 00:08:13,775 Obviously I can't do that much exercise, 249 00:08:13,870 --> 00:08:15,875 but it doesn't matter, because Doug Judy is telling the truth, 250 00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:17,064 - right, Judy? - I got you, baby. 251 00:08:17,149 --> 00:08:18,848 So fine. 100,000 push-ups. 252 00:08:18,934 --> 00:08:20,212 You happy, Sarge? 253 00:08:20,298 --> 00:08:22,697 - Great. Now, Doug... - You never call me Doug. 254 00:08:22,783 --> 00:08:23,893 Yeah, well, you called me Jake earlier. 255 00:08:23,978 --> 00:08:25,106 I thought we were switching to first names. 256 00:08:25,191 --> 00:08:26,325 I was thinking the same exact thing! 257 00:08:26,410 --> 00:08:27,526 I was like, "Why not call him Jake?" 258 00:08:27,611 --> 00:08:29,491 - We're bonding, man. - 'Cause he's so official. 259 00:08:31,087 --> 00:08:32,900 But it's chill now. 260 00:08:32,986 --> 00:08:35,377 - So, Doug... - Yes, Jake? 261 00:08:35,463 --> 00:08:37,684 Now that we know the copycat is using your playbook, 262 00:08:37,769 --> 00:08:40,034 if you were still in the game... Which you're not, 263 00:08:40,181 --> 00:08:42,472 we all agree... What would your next move be? 264 00:08:42,955 --> 00:08:44,236 It's fight night at Barclays. 265 00:08:44,322 --> 00:08:46,361 No sport attracts more ultra-wealthy people 266 00:08:46,447 --> 00:08:47,814 with super-nice cars than boxing. 267 00:08:47,900 --> 00:08:50,619 Really? What about the sport of hunting man? 268 00:08:50,705 --> 00:08:52,142 - You got me. - That's not a thing. 269 00:08:52,228 --> 00:08:53,565 Right. So should we just start at Barclays then? 270 00:08:53,650 --> 00:08:54,870 Great. But first, we got to make 271 00:08:54,955 --> 00:08:56,568 a quick little pit stop on the way. 272 00:08:56,654 --> 00:08:57,916 What? Where? 273 00:09:05,001 --> 00:09:07,049 Okay, here are the rules to the contest. 274 00:09:07,167 --> 00:09:08,252 If you order a drink, 275 00:09:08,338 --> 00:09:10,471 it must be fully consumed before you order another. 276 00:09:10,557 --> 00:09:12,823 Each team's tab will be tracked on that board. 277 00:09:12,919 --> 00:09:15,299 We don't want anyone getting alcohol poisoning, 278 00:09:15,385 --> 00:09:17,026 so if you throw up, you're disqualified. 279 00:09:17,113 --> 00:09:19,471 I never throw up. I just tell my stomach to deal with it. 280 00:09:19,557 --> 00:09:21,088 My body is terrified of me. 281 00:09:21,174 --> 00:09:22,643 Guys, there's no way we can win. 282 00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:24,346 There's nine of them and six of us. 283 00:09:24,432 --> 00:09:26,393 Five of you. I'm going home. 284 00:09:26,479 --> 00:09:28,265 Although perhaps I'll stop at Bel Vino on the way, 285 00:09:28,338 --> 00:09:29,518 have a glass of Sancerre. 286 00:09:29,604 --> 00:09:31,259 Might even try the quince paste 287 00:09:31,344 --> 00:09:33,924 if I'm feeling... naughty. 288 00:09:34,023 --> 00:09:35,550 You're really gonna let these firefighters 289 00:09:35,635 --> 00:09:36,979 take Shaw's from us? 290 00:09:37,065 --> 00:09:39,156 Think of all the celebrations we've had here, 291 00:09:39,242 --> 00:09:41,334 all the times Terry has yelled "Nine-Nine!" 292 00:09:41,436 --> 00:09:42,395 I hate it when he says that. 293 00:09:42,481 --> 00:09:44,042 He should say, "Cheers" 294 00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:45,487 to the Ninety-Ninth Precinct!" 295 00:09:46,862 --> 00:09:47,862 We shouldn't be here. 296 00:09:47,948 --> 00:09:49,636 If you're worried that someone will recognize me 297 00:09:49,721 --> 00:09:51,453 and find out I'm still alive, they won't. 298 00:09:51,539 --> 00:09:53,112 There's not too many hardened criminals 299 00:09:53,198 --> 00:09:54,909 at Justin Friedman's bar mitzvah. 300 00:09:54,995 --> 00:09:58,299 Although there is a murderer on the loose, 301 00:09:58,415 --> 00:10:00,612 'cause Kevin Goldman is killing those dance moves! 302 00:10:00,698 --> 00:10:01,725 Get it, Kevin! 303 00:10:01,810 --> 00:10:03,549 That's the floss. He's flossing. 304 00:10:03,635 --> 00:10:05,380 It's just that we should be at Barclays already. 305 00:10:05,465 --> 00:10:06,599 The fights are starting soon. 306 00:10:06,684 --> 00:10:08,542 Rich guys never show up on time. 307 00:10:08,686 --> 00:10:10,674 Besides, I promised Justin I'd be here. 308 00:10:10,760 --> 00:10:12,807 What up, J-Smooth! 309 00:10:14,591 --> 00:10:17,315 Gone straight, my ass. I got you, Doug Judy. 310 00:10:17,401 --> 00:10:18,480 - Huh? - What are you talking about? 311 00:10:18,565 --> 00:10:20,550 Something felt wrong, stopping for this bar mitzvah, 312 00:10:20,635 --> 00:10:22,151 so I sent some plainclothes officers 313 00:10:22,237 --> 00:10:23,719 to watch the lots at Barclays. 314 00:10:23,832 --> 00:10:25,652 - They just caught the copycat. - I don't understand. 315 00:10:25,737 --> 00:10:27,532 If anything, that proves Judy's innocent. 316 00:10:27,618 --> 00:10:28,795 He's been standing here with us the whole time. 317 00:10:28,880 --> 00:10:31,377 Which was his plan! Establish an alibi, 318 00:10:31,463 --> 00:10:33,245 so his partner can go off stealing cars. 319 00:10:33,331 --> 00:10:34,497 I don't have a partner. 320 00:10:34,582 --> 00:10:35,585 Whoever this is, I promise you, 321 00:10:35,670 --> 00:10:36,706 I do not know him. 322 00:10:36,792 --> 00:10:38,792 Actually, Doug, I think you do. 323 00:10:39,143 --> 00:10:40,451 Oh, my God. 324 00:10:40,675 --> 00:10:42,323 - Trudy Judy! - Trudy Judy! - Trudy Judy! 325 00:10:42,659 --> 00:10:44,542 You still want to pretend you had nothing to do with this? 326 00:10:44,627 --> 00:10:46,370 I didn't, and she didn't either. 327 00:10:46,456 --> 00:10:47,862 Trudy Judy's not a car thief. 328 00:10:47,948 --> 00:10:49,120 Trudy Judy's an angel. 329 00:10:49,206 --> 00:10:50,527 She's putting herself through nursing school. 330 00:10:50,612 --> 00:10:52,174 And nurses are the best of our society. 331 00:10:52,260 --> 00:10:53,424 Name one bad nurse. 332 00:10:53,510 --> 00:10:55,635 Nurse Ratched. Kathy Bates in "Misery." 333 00:10:55,721 --> 00:10:57,104 Nurse Jackie had a pill problem. 334 00:10:57,190 --> 00:10:58,980 Okay, damn, you got a lot of real good examples 335 00:10:59,065 --> 00:11:00,800 off the top of your head. You believe me, right, Jake? 336 00:11:00,885 --> 00:11:02,207 I mean, the fact pattern's not great, 337 00:11:02,292 --> 00:11:04,065 but Trudy did seem very nice when I met her. 338 00:11:04,151 --> 00:11:05,355 You trying to get your freak on with my sister? 339 00:11:05,440 --> 00:11:06,182 What? No. 340 00:11:06,268 --> 00:11:07,636 I see you looking at Trudy Judy's booty. 341 00:11:07,721 --> 00:11:09,440 I am not looking at Trudy Judy's booty. 342 00:11:09,526 --> 00:11:10,660 Oh, you don't think she's a cutie? 343 00:11:10,745 --> 00:11:12,058 - Don't be snooty. - She's a beauty, 344 00:11:12,143 --> 00:11:13,745 - but I'm on duty. - And you're married. 345 00:11:13,831 --> 00:11:14,721 Well, yeah, but that doesn't rhyme. 346 00:11:14,807 --> 00:11:16,237 Sorry, I just get so overprotective. 347 00:11:16,323 --> 00:11:17,370 She's such a good kid. 348 00:11:17,456 --> 00:11:19,245 I guarantee you, she didn't steal those cars. 349 00:11:19,331 --> 00:11:21,566 We caught her sitting in a Bentley with a power amplifier 350 00:11:21,651 --> 00:11:23,796 and a homemade override plugged into the CAN bus. 351 00:11:23,882 --> 00:11:25,226 Yeah, she guilty. 352 00:11:25,506 --> 00:11:27,866 I can't believe you made us think you were dead. 353 00:11:27,952 --> 00:11:29,382 I can't believe you're out here stealing cars. 354 00:11:29,467 --> 00:11:30,852 - That's for lowlifes. - You steal cars. 355 00:11:30,937 --> 00:11:32,749 And I'm a lowlife. A gorgeous, charming, 356 00:11:32,835 --> 00:11:34,491 super smart lowlife beloved by all. 357 00:11:34,577 --> 00:11:35,429 I'm sorry, Dougie. 358 00:11:35,515 --> 00:11:36,899 I was falling behind on my student loans. 359 00:11:36,984 --> 00:11:38,085 I had to do something. 360 00:11:38,171 --> 00:11:39,617 Guys, if you weren't working together, 361 00:11:39,702 --> 00:11:41,102 how did she know all your signature moves? 362 00:11:41,187 --> 00:11:42,741 I found some of Doug's old notebooks. 363 00:11:42,827 --> 00:11:43,953 Those are notes for my memoir. 364 00:11:44,038 --> 00:11:45,507 Memoir? Do you have title ideas yet? 365 00:11:45,593 --> 00:11:48,507 I was just gonna call it "The Pontiac Bandit..." 366 00:11:50,304 --> 00:11:51,612 - Oh, is that it? - Yeah. 367 00:11:51,698 --> 00:11:53,023 - Okay. - I hated stealing cars. 368 00:11:53,109 --> 00:11:54,163 I was gonna stop as soon 369 00:11:54,249 --> 00:11:55,276 as nursing school was paid off, 370 00:11:55,361 --> 00:11:56,843 I swear. It was a mistake. 371 00:11:56,929 --> 00:11:58,634 That's good enough for me. Come on, Trudy, let's go home. 372 00:11:58,719 --> 00:12:00,680 That's not really how arresting works. 373 00:12:00,766 --> 00:12:02,240 - She's going to jail. - Wait, wait, wait. 374 00:12:02,325 --> 00:12:03,609 What if we get you a bigger fish? 375 00:12:03,695 --> 00:12:05,102 What if we can get you Stefano? Who? 376 00:12:05,187 --> 00:12:08,575 That cherry red 1961 Ferrari 250GT California you took 377 00:12:08,661 --> 00:12:10,575 belongs to a guy named Stefano Lucas. 378 00:12:10,661 --> 00:12:12,248 He thinks I did it, and now he wants to kill me. 379 00:12:12,333 --> 00:12:13,997 Oh, my God, I'm so sorry. I had no idea. 380 00:12:14,083 --> 00:12:15,450 It's all good. You have the car, 381 00:12:15,536 --> 00:12:17,645 so I call him, tell him I'm not dead, 382 00:12:17,731 --> 00:12:19,145 say I want to give him his car back, 383 00:12:19,231 --> 00:12:21,498 arrange a drop, and these guys take him down or die trying. 384 00:12:21,583 --> 00:12:22,977 That is interesting. 385 00:12:23,063 --> 00:12:24,763 Stefano almost never comes out in public. 386 00:12:24,849 --> 00:12:26,569 It would be a huge collar for the Nine-Nine. 387 00:12:26,686 --> 00:12:29,247 - What do you say, Sarge? - 100,000 push-ups? 388 00:12:29,884 --> 00:12:32,497 Fine. If you deliver Stefano, I'll talk to the DA 389 00:12:32,583 --> 00:12:34,109 about a reduced sentence for your sister. 390 00:12:34,194 --> 00:12:36,808 Thank you so much. There's just one problem. 391 00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:38,580 I don't have the car. 392 00:12:38,665 --> 00:12:40,321 I already handed it off to a fence. 393 00:12:40,406 --> 00:12:42,802 Oh, Judy, Judy, you screwed me. 394 00:12:42,887 --> 00:12:45,255 Four hours left. We're down $58. 395 00:12:45,341 --> 00:12:47,091 - Amy, where you at? - Four drinks. 396 00:12:47,177 --> 00:12:49,420 - What's four-drink Amy again? - Why don't you come over here 397 00:12:49,505 --> 00:12:51,497 and find out? Right, Horny Amy. 398 00:12:51,583 --> 00:12:53,489 It feels like you should retire that one for the MeToo era. 399 00:12:53,574 --> 00:12:55,270 Why don't you come over here and make me? 400 00:12:55,356 --> 00:12:56,724 All right, there's only one thing left to do. 401 00:12:56,809 --> 00:12:58,216 - Drink faster. - Set a bunch of fires 402 00:12:58,301 --> 00:12:59,443 throughout the city. Mine's better. 403 00:12:59,528 --> 00:13:00,622 No! 404 00:13:00,878 --> 00:13:02,411 We can do this. 405 00:13:02,548 --> 00:13:04,161 Things seem bleak now, 406 00:13:04,247 --> 00:13:07,223 but the night is always darkest before the dawn. 407 00:13:07,520 --> 00:13:09,223 This is Shaw's. 408 00:13:09,646 --> 00:13:11,780 We've had weddings here, 409 00:13:11,866 --> 00:13:13,392 and funerals. 410 00:13:13,478 --> 00:13:16,044 Shaw's is part of our family, 411 00:13:16,396 --> 00:13:18,567 because that is what we are. 412 00:13:19,184 --> 00:13:20,622 A family. 413 00:13:20,708 --> 00:13:23,104 And we're not just Amy and Rosa 414 00:13:23,296 --> 00:13:24,819 and Hitchcock and... 415 00:13:33,458 --> 00:13:35,294 So the fence, Dallas, he works in there. 416 00:13:35,380 --> 00:13:36,762 I don't like him. My rule? 417 00:13:36,848 --> 00:13:38,434 Never trust anyone named after a city. 418 00:13:38,528 --> 00:13:39,497 What about Orlando Bloom? 419 00:13:39,583 --> 00:13:40,646 I never thought about him being named 420 00:13:40,731 --> 00:13:42,833 after the city before, and his last name is Bloom? 421 00:13:42,929 --> 00:13:45,145 Wait a minute. Did we just realize something crazy? 422 00:13:45,231 --> 00:13:47,024 No, everyone knows it's a crazy name. 423 00:13:47,109 --> 00:13:48,537 Now can we just focus on the meet-up? 424 00:13:48,622 --> 00:13:50,247 - Fine. - All right, Dallas is creepy 425 00:13:50,333 --> 00:13:52,607 and paranoid, and he really freaked me out that last time. 426 00:13:52,692 --> 00:13:54,479 - I don't want to go in alone. - Don't worry, kid. 427 00:13:54,564 --> 00:13:56,294 I'll be there right next to you, as always. 428 00:13:56,380 --> 00:13:58,520 Aw. Sarge, why don't you say stuff like that to me? 429 00:13:58,606 --> 00:14:01,652 No, look, I do not trust the Judys going anywhere alone. 430 00:14:01,738 --> 00:14:03,619 Doug, you stay with Jake. I'll go in with Trudy. 431 00:14:03,735 --> 00:14:04,848 I just need a cover story. 432 00:14:04,934 --> 00:14:06,025 We could say that you're my boyfriend. 433 00:14:06,110 --> 00:14:07,505 No. No, no, no, I don't want 434 00:14:07,591 --> 00:14:09,220 my little sister fake-dating some pervert. 435 00:14:09,305 --> 00:14:10,661 What? Why am I a pervert? 436 00:14:10,747 --> 00:14:12,353 Uh, have you ever met a nice, normal guy 437 00:14:12,439 --> 00:14:14,340 that wears suspenders every day? 438 00:14:14,426 --> 00:14:15,763 What kind of person has to tie their pants down 439 00:14:15,848 --> 00:14:16,920 to keep them from flying off? 440 00:14:17,005 --> 00:14:18,326 That's not what suspenders are for, man. 441 00:14:18,411 --> 00:14:19,684 Guys, we don't have time 442 00:14:19,770 --> 00:14:21,396 to figure out what suspenders are for, all right? 443 00:14:21,481 --> 00:14:23,567 Now, Trudy, this is undercover work. 444 00:14:23,653 --> 00:14:25,466 It can be very intense. Are you sure you can handle it? 445 00:14:25,551 --> 00:14:27,637 I mean, I'll do my best. 446 00:14:27,731 --> 00:14:29,981 - Who's this? - This is Deion. He's my man. 447 00:14:30,106 --> 00:14:32,895 Ask me another question, you simple little barn animal. 448 00:14:32,981 --> 00:14:34,520 Okay, so she can handle it. 449 00:14:34,630 --> 00:14:35,739 Why is your boyfriend here? 450 00:14:35,825 --> 00:14:38,075 Who said boyfriend? Deion and I freak, 451 00:14:38,161 --> 00:14:39,511 then he shuts his pretty little mouth 452 00:14:39,596 --> 00:14:40,950 and lets me handle my business. 453 00:14:41,036 --> 00:14:42,471 I don't like the direction this is going. 454 00:14:42,556 --> 00:14:44,059 Easy. She's just playing a part. 455 00:14:44,145 --> 00:14:45,540 Pretty big age difference here. 456 00:14:45,626 --> 00:14:47,238 - Where'd you guys meet? - The club. 457 00:14:47,348 --> 00:14:48,778 Deion was a bouncer, 458 00:14:48,864 --> 00:14:51,651 and I told him I wanted him to bounce on me. 459 00:14:51,737 --> 00:14:53,001 Oh, what is that? 460 00:14:53,129 --> 00:14:54,350 Is she rubbing on his mic? 461 00:14:54,436 --> 00:14:55,926 The mic that was taped to his chest? 462 00:14:56,012 --> 00:14:57,407 You should feel these. 463 00:14:57,493 --> 00:14:59,105 They're like two baseball bases. 464 00:14:59,486 --> 00:15:00,535 Make 'em pop, daddy. 465 00:15:00,621 --> 00:15:02,169 Daddy's not sure this is the time. 466 00:15:02,255 --> 00:15:03,442 Do it, daddy! 467 00:15:03,539 --> 00:15:05,981 Ooh, ow! Ooh, ow! 468 00:15:06,101 --> 00:15:07,409 Get your hands off her, pervert! 469 00:15:07,494 --> 00:15:09,094 Judy! Judy! I tried to stop him. 470 00:15:09,180 --> 00:15:10,564 That's my baby sister you're caressing. 471 00:15:10,649 --> 00:15:13,180 What? How can I caress her with my pecs? 472 00:15:13,282 --> 00:15:14,564 Look at those things. They got thumbs. 473 00:15:14,649 --> 00:15:16,566 Guys, guys, stop! Where is Dallas? 474 00:15:16,652 --> 00:15:18,367 I think he got spooked and ran away. 475 00:15:18,453 --> 00:15:19,656 Good job, Doug Judy. 476 00:15:19,742 --> 00:15:22,047 You just cost your sister a chance at a reduced sentence. 477 00:15:22,133 --> 00:15:25,094 Oh, no! Why is my tone so playful? 478 00:15:25,179 --> 00:15:26,734 Why is there a twinkle in my eye? 479 00:15:26,820 --> 00:15:33,435 Because I just found our 1961 Ferrari 250GT California. 480 00:15:33,520 --> 00:15:34,871 Oh, ho, ho! 481 00:15:34,956 --> 00:15:36,960 Ladies and gents and pervert Terry, 482 00:15:37,045 --> 00:15:38,359 we are in business. 483 00:15:38,467 --> 00:15:40,539 Sorry, Sarge, I got caught up in the moment there. 484 00:15:40,812 --> 00:15:42,598 Guys, I threw up. 485 00:15:42,684 --> 00:15:44,079 Oh, man, it's over. 486 00:15:44,165 --> 00:15:45,555 - We need a miracle. - I'm here. 487 00:15:45,641 --> 00:15:47,242 Captain Holt! How are you here? 488 00:15:47,328 --> 00:15:48,984 You called me. You didn't stop calling me. 489 00:15:49,070 --> 00:15:50,984 I didn't call you. Look. 490 00:15:51,070 --> 00:15:52,813 You left 17 voicemails. 491 00:15:52,924 --> 00:15:54,101 Here's one. 492 00:15:54,187 --> 00:15:56,104 Holt! You got to come save us. 493 00:15:56,190 --> 00:15:57,781 We need a lie to get you here. 494 00:15:57,867 --> 00:15:59,109 Charles, what should I say? 495 00:15:59,216 --> 00:16:00,758 That I got shot in the face. 496 00:16:00,844 --> 00:16:02,369 Ooh, and tell him to bring pizza. 497 00:16:02,455 --> 00:16:04,024 Whoo! Crampon Holt! 498 00:16:04,110 --> 00:16:05,243 We're losing. 499 00:16:05,329 --> 00:16:07,242 Yeah! Why are you dancing? 500 00:16:07,328 --> 00:16:09,071 Oh, I was up to nine-drink Amy, 501 00:16:09,157 --> 00:16:10,649 who speaks French, 502 00:16:10,735 --> 00:16:12,696 and then I hurl... 503 00:16:12,868 --> 00:16:14,915 I hurl... Hurled. 504 00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:16,903 What she's trying to say is that she vomited, 505 00:16:16,989 --> 00:16:18,867 and now she's back down to three-drink Amy, 506 00:16:18,953 --> 00:16:19,906 or Amy Dance Pants. 507 00:16:19,992 --> 00:16:21,213 You know it. 508 00:16:21,891 --> 00:16:22,891 My God. 509 00:16:22,977 --> 00:16:25,141 Hitchcock, are you the only person still making sense? 510 00:16:25,227 --> 00:16:26,836 Yeah. It's bad. 511 00:16:26,922 --> 00:16:29,406 So are you gonna make us give up, Clappin? 512 00:16:29,492 --> 00:16:30,930 Or are you here to tell us to stop? 513 00:16:31,016 --> 00:16:32,500 No, I'm here to help you win. 514 00:16:32,586 --> 00:16:34,399 What is happening? Why is this? 515 00:16:34,581 --> 00:16:36,181 It's something you said on one of your voicemails, 516 00:16:36,266 --> 00:16:38,352 after you had sung the entirety of a song 517 00:16:38,438 --> 00:16:39,626 called "Shake Whatcha Mama Gave Ya." 518 00:16:39,711 --> 00:16:41,400 You thought you had hung up, but you hadn't. 519 00:16:41,485 --> 00:16:45,000 Anyway, bye-bye. What am I doing calling him? 520 00:16:45,086 --> 00:16:47,656 He doesn't care about us or what we want. 521 00:16:47,742 --> 00:16:49,529 When I heard that, I was shaken to my core. 522 00:16:49,615 --> 00:16:51,285 I thought this bar was beneath me, 523 00:16:51,371 --> 00:16:53,941 but what was actually beneath me was my own behavior. 524 00:16:54,042 --> 00:16:55,766 - I had turned my back on... - Holt! 525 00:16:55,852 --> 00:16:57,695 We do not have time for this. 526 00:16:57,781 --> 00:16:59,133 Just drinky, drinky! 527 00:16:59,226 --> 00:17:03,394 Hank, bring me a Charbonnay. 528 00:17:04,003 --> 00:17:06,417 All right, Stefano should be here any minute. 529 00:17:06,541 --> 00:17:08,379 I just want to thank you guys so much for helping me. 530 00:17:08,464 --> 00:17:09,706 I don't deserve your kindness. 531 00:17:09,792 --> 00:17:11,143 Hey, don't be so hard on yourself. 532 00:17:11,229 --> 00:17:13,015 We all make bad decisions when we're younger. 533 00:17:13,101 --> 00:17:15,018 - I was once in a flash mob. - Ew. 534 00:17:15,104 --> 00:17:16,325 Something's off about this. 535 00:17:16,411 --> 00:17:17,937 I don't like leaving Judy out there alone. 536 00:17:18,022 --> 00:17:19,589 Relax, we have a tracker on the car, 537 00:17:19,675 --> 00:17:21,020 a tracker on Doug Judy, 538 00:17:21,106 --> 00:17:22,901 and ESU has the entire area surrounded. 539 00:17:22,987 --> 00:17:25,042 - It's gonna be fine. - We got movement. 540 00:17:25,269 --> 00:17:26,777 Okay, everyone, to your positions. 541 00:17:26,863 --> 00:17:28,040 On my signal. 542 00:17:28,126 --> 00:17:30,448 Hold. Hold. 543 00:17:30,873 --> 00:17:32,315 Hold. 544 00:17:32,569 --> 00:17:34,181 Sorry, I started holding too soon. 545 00:17:34,267 --> 00:17:36,228 Let's start over. Hold. 546 00:17:36,469 --> 00:17:37,972 Hold. 547 00:17:38,058 --> 00:17:39,538 And... 548 00:17:40,979 --> 00:17:43,515 Everyone, stop holding! Go, go, go, go! 549 00:17:44,320 --> 00:17:46,118 Where is he? Where is he? 550 00:17:46,203 --> 00:17:47,804 Got him. They got Stefano. 551 00:17:47,890 --> 00:17:50,188 No, not Stefano. The Pontiac Bandit. 552 00:17:50,274 --> 00:17:52,017 - Where is... - Doug Judy here. 553 00:17:52,102 --> 00:17:53,366 Y'all see that car blow up? 554 00:17:53,451 --> 00:17:55,406 Yeah, we did. Why did you do that? 555 00:17:55,492 --> 00:17:56,562 You think I did that? 556 00:17:56,648 --> 00:17:58,171 Doug Judy does not work with fire. 557 00:17:58,257 --> 00:17:59,993 Yeah, he's like the Hound from "Game of Thrones." 558 00:18:00,078 --> 00:18:01,992 I am like the Hound. And you're my Arya. 559 00:18:02,078 --> 00:18:03,245 - Right? - Guys! 560 00:18:03,330 --> 00:18:06,015 If Doug Judy didn't blow up the car, who did? 561 00:18:07,718 --> 00:18:09,781 - Trudy Judy. - Trudy Judy. - Trudy Judy. 562 00:18:14,084 --> 00:18:16,523 Damn, sir, you took that Charbonnay to the house. 563 00:18:16,648 --> 00:18:18,391 - How you feeling? - Let me take stock. 564 00:18:18,476 --> 00:18:20,219 My equilibrium is askew, 565 00:18:20,304 --> 00:18:22,395 my vision is partially impaired, 566 00:18:22,480 --> 00:18:24,223 and I'm clearly slurring my words. 567 00:18:24,308 --> 00:18:26,312 To put a fine point on it, your boy is turnt. 568 00:18:26,397 --> 00:18:28,734 Well, well, well, there's only a minute left, 569 00:18:28,820 --> 00:18:30,406 and you are six bucks down. 570 00:18:30,492 --> 00:18:31,876 I don't think you guys are gonna make it. 571 00:18:31,961 --> 00:18:33,493 Hank, another Charb. 572 00:18:33,578 --> 00:18:36,039 This one's hot. It was sitting on the radiator. 573 00:18:40,629 --> 00:18:42,765 - He's never gonna make it. - Yes, he will. 574 00:18:42,875 --> 00:18:46,062 Just don't breathe. Let the liquid into your lungs. 575 00:18:47,717 --> 00:18:51,359 Five, four, three, two... 576 00:18:51,641 --> 00:18:53,914 Closing time! Cops win! 577 00:18:57,254 --> 00:19:00,492 All right, fine, the bar is yours. 578 00:19:00,828 --> 00:19:04,336 But we're keeping this! 579 00:19:04,422 --> 00:19:05,481 Come on. 580 00:19:05,567 --> 00:19:07,648 Before we all go home and pass out, 581 00:19:07,734 --> 00:19:10,609 I want to say how sorry I am that I deserted you earlier. 582 00:19:10,734 --> 00:19:13,687 I want you to know that I care about you all so very much, 583 00:19:13,773 --> 00:19:14,839 each and every one of you. 584 00:19:14,924 --> 00:19:17,797 Boyle, Santiago, Diaz, Hitchcock... 585 00:19:20,547 --> 00:19:22,507 All right, I have officers looking for her. 586 00:19:22,593 --> 00:19:24,531 She was on foot. She couldn't have gone far. 587 00:19:25,148 --> 00:19:26,328 This is her. 588 00:19:26,413 --> 00:19:28,505 - Where are you, Trudy? - In the wind, Dougie. 589 00:19:28,617 --> 00:19:30,735 Okay, that's a cool thing to say, but what are you doing? 590 00:19:30,820 --> 00:19:32,032 They were gonna reduce your charges. 591 00:19:32,117 --> 00:19:33,656 Reduced charges are still charges, 592 00:19:33,742 --> 00:19:35,093 and I can't go to prison. 593 00:19:35,179 --> 00:19:38,078 There are no dudes there, and I need to smush! 594 00:19:38,164 --> 00:19:39,609 - Trudy! - Oh, grow up, Doug. 595 00:19:39,695 --> 00:19:41,474 I'm an adult woman who's horny all the time. 596 00:19:41,559 --> 00:19:43,945 - What is going on? - Oh, are you judging me, ho? 597 00:19:44,031 --> 00:19:45,501 Trudy, running from the cops is a felony. 598 00:19:45,586 --> 00:19:46,914 That means no more nursing school. 599 00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:48,047 Good. It sucked. 600 00:19:48,133 --> 00:19:49,133 I only went to, like, one class. 601 00:19:49,218 --> 00:19:50,679 - What? - It was boring as hell. 602 00:19:50,765 --> 00:19:52,664 So then I started running Internet scams. 603 00:19:52,757 --> 00:19:53,984 Then there was identity theft. 604 00:19:54,070 --> 00:19:55,515 I was Queen Latifah for a bit. 605 00:19:55,601 --> 00:19:57,593 Then Lil' Kim. That was less believable. 606 00:19:57,679 --> 00:19:59,884 But then I found your old notebooks. 607 00:19:59,969 --> 00:20:02,452 How come you never told me how much fun car thieving is? 608 00:20:02,537 --> 00:20:04,352 Because I didn't want you to fall in love with it. 609 00:20:04,437 --> 00:20:05,498 Wait, I'm confused. 610 00:20:05,583 --> 00:20:07,327 When did you put the bomb in the Ferrari? 611 00:20:07,413 --> 00:20:08,944 I didn't do it. Dallas did. 612 00:20:09,030 --> 00:20:11,062 And Dallas isn't some criminal I'm afraid of. 613 00:20:11,148 --> 00:20:13,054 - He's my employee. - Say what's up, Dallas. 614 00:20:13,140 --> 00:20:14,899 - Wassup? - Named after a city. 615 00:20:14,984 --> 00:20:16,554 The hard part was trying to figure out 616 00:20:16,640 --> 00:20:17,945 how to tell him my plan, so then I came up 617 00:20:18,030 --> 00:20:19,469 with that whole boyfriend thing, 618 00:20:19,554 --> 00:20:21,209 because I needed a distraction. 619 00:20:21,294 --> 00:20:22,950 I knew you'd rush in, all weird and old-fashioned, 620 00:20:23,035 --> 00:20:24,517 try to protect my honor. 621 00:20:24,602 --> 00:20:26,693 How can I caress her with my pecs? 622 00:20:26,778 --> 00:20:28,521 Look at those things. They got thumbs. 623 00:20:28,606 --> 00:20:30,247 I don't need you to protect me, Doug. 624 00:20:30,333 --> 00:20:31,528 You're my baby sister. 625 00:20:31,614 --> 00:20:32,656 I got to look out for you. 626 00:20:32,741 --> 00:20:35,099 That's so sweet, and also dumb. 627 00:20:35,185 --> 00:20:37,067 I'll see you at Christmas, sucker! 628 00:20:37,153 --> 00:20:38,575 I love you, big bro. 629 00:20:38,660 --> 00:20:39,793 Trudy! 630 00:20:40,044 --> 00:20:42,497 Man, I am gutted. This is awful. 631 00:20:42,583 --> 00:20:44,319 Is this how you feel every time I trick you? 632 00:20:44,404 --> 00:20:46,020 Pretty much. Yeah, it always hurts. 633 00:20:46,106 --> 00:20:47,231 Wow, I'm sorry, man. 634 00:20:47,317 --> 00:20:48,685 It must be really hard to hang out with me. 635 00:20:48,770 --> 00:20:49,842 Well, it's a tough relationship, 636 00:20:49,927 --> 00:20:50,825 but it's exciting. 637 00:20:50,911 --> 00:20:52,414 Hey, Doug, I'm sorry for not trusting you. 638 00:20:52,499 --> 00:20:54,123 Turns out you had nothing to do with this. 639 00:20:54,208 --> 00:20:56,723 Oh, so you admit people can change. 640 00:20:56,808 --> 00:20:59,465 Yes. Bruce Banner's pants and shirt were correct. 641 00:20:59,550 --> 00:21:00,945 You know what this means, right? 642 00:21:01,030 --> 00:21:02,903 6,203. 643 00:21:02,989 --> 00:21:04,862 6,204. 644 00:21:04,947 --> 00:21:06,690 I am so glad I lost this bet. 645 00:21:06,775 --> 00:21:08,561 I never find time for things I enjoy. 646 00:21:08,646 --> 00:21:09,841 This is so unsatisfying. 647 00:21:09,927 --> 00:21:11,073 You're not even sweating. 648 00:21:11,159 --> 00:21:12,823 It's too easy. Get on my back, Jake. 649 00:21:12,909 --> 00:21:14,121 - No, I'm not... - Get on my back, 650 00:21:14,206 --> 00:21:15,674 - Jake! - Coming, strong man! 651 00:21:15,776 --> 00:21:17,373 Fremulon. 652 00:21:17,568 --> 00:21:18,901 - Not a doctor. - Shh.