♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way ♪
♪ Oh, what fun it is to... ♪
[coughs]
[Christmas rock music plays in background)
[inhales and exhales]
Hey there, pretty.
[Christmas disco music]
[sniffles]
[sighs]
What happened in there is what you young people refer to as epic.
Goddamn, Sax, you wreck my porcelain again?
Maybe. Want to guess from which end?
[gargles]
-You costing me business, Sax. -Costing you business?
I am single-handedly keeping this shithole in the black.
You're going to miss me when I'm gone, Terrance.
[gags]
-Not vodka. I give up, what is it? -Quit your bitching.
I could dissolve a body in this shit.
[sighs] Goddamn Christmas miracle I'm still alive!
Saving yourself for some lucky girl, I guess.
Well, ho, ho, ho. What's Santa got for me tonight?
Please just take it.
Now, that's interesting.
Going to be a busy holiday season for you and me both by the looks of it.
-Don't know nothing about it, Satan. -Well, you have yourself a Merry...
[engine revs]
Fuck it.
[romantic Italian music]
[Hailey] Sockatoo is my favorite.
No, Baballoon.
No, Sockatoo.
[Amanda] I thought you liked the pink one.
She's the sick Wishee. You can tell from her spots.
Mm. Right.
And what about Happy? Which one's Happy's favorite?
Happy doesn't have a favorite.
He doesn't like Wishees. Do you, Happy?
He thinks that they're weirdos.
[laughs]
We got to go! We're going to be late!
[M.C.] And now, it's the moment you've all been waiting for.
They call him the man who made Christmas for thousands of underprivileged children.
Come on, Mom! It's starting! Come on!
[M.C.] He's the man who makes the sun shine!
[cheering]
Sonny Shine!
[cheering]
Ah!
Sonny Shine!
Not just one wish!
-Not just two! -Not just two wishes!
-[Sonny] But... -[Hailey] You get three wishes!
-Let me hear you say Wishees! -[crowd] Wishees
You say Wishees! You say Wishees!
I can't see!
[Sonny chuckles]
Why walk, when you can dance!
-I can't see! -I'm sorry.
[Hailey] Let's get closer!
Ew! [laughs]
Hailey? Hailey!
Hailey! Hailey! Hailey!
Don't worry, Happy. We'll go back.
[Sonny chatters in background]
There were too many people, I couldn't see!
But I only want one wish. That's not true. Don't be mean.
Mr. Sunshine! I only need one wish!
What do you mean run away? From who?
Here they come!
[cheering]
Hailey!
Yo, get a load of this snowflake, huh?
Little bitch changed up his look since then, right?
-Easy money. -No. This is not easy money.
Dude, chill. Three Scaramuccis
against one Bum Fights looking motherfucker.
All right, we're gonna drop him like a hot deuce.
You never seen Sax doing work. I did.
What I can't figure is why Uncle Blue would wanna whack this guy.
Maybe he knows too much.
-Whoa! Mikey! -[all chatter]
Oh, my God! Look at you. Welcome home, little bro.
-Hey, no one knew you was back. -I left straight from the funeral.
Hey, guys, a moment of silence for Don Scaramucci, God rest his soul.
And to think, our little Michelangelo,
sitting right by the bedside as the great man peaced out.
Mwah!
Yeah.
Looks like the four Smootchie bros are gonna kick some ass tonight.
Hey, take a look at this job we just got.
Count me out. I got something for Uncle Blue.
Straight from the Don. It can't wait.
-[PAL] What you got, Mikey? -Yeah. Bro. Fuck that.
A little ballistic therapy first, then go kiss the ring.
All right, Uncle Freaky ain't going no place.
-Hey. Watch your mouth, dumbass. -[exhales]
You kidding me? The Don's dead so all of a sudden
-we're supposed to bow-- -Christ's sake,
I ain't even unpacked yet.
What's up, little Mike?
You afraid of getting blood on your Dolce and Ga-fuckin-Bana?
[prawn man] So, it turns out they did some research.
[gags]
-Statistical shit. -Listen, dude, could you hurry it up?
I have an eleven o'clock, supposed to be here any minute.
They proved that hookers,
see hookers like you, who work the holidays,
you share an economic niche with the department store Santa Claus.
It's a time of giving. Empty 'em.
Empty 'em!
Empty my big shiny Christmas balls.
Now, here's something you don't see every day.
[screams]
[air deflates from prawn suit]
I'm your eleven o'clock.
-Sorry, am I early? -Oh, shit.
Well, that's novel.
-Cockroach? -Prawn, it's like a shrimp.
-Um, please don't, please... -Look, you need to relax.
If I'd showed up on time, that hammer would be halfway through your skull.
Oh, that's the last weirdo, I swear to God.
Now's not the time to be making big decisions here.
Hey, hey, I know you.
I don't think so.
Yeah. You're a... You're a cop, right? You busted me back in the day.
You... You were a real gentleman. Didn't make a pass or anything.
Uh, you told me to get on a bus and go home. Get my act together.
You inspired me.
I can see that.
Yeah, well, you don't look like a cop no more.
-What happened? -Yeah, I'd be tickled to death
to have that conversation with you right now.
But I'd prefer to talk about how you're going to pay me back.
Talk to me, bro. What's eating you, hm?
[distant siren blares]
Huh? I know you. This ain't Disco Mikey.
I saw your Snapchat, the chicks, the wine.
You must've had the time of your life out there, huh?
[screaming]
Sure. Best ever.
You guys probably think I got some kind of big inheritance lined up.
The Old Don hooked me up real good before he kicked it, right?
What? You saying it ain't true?
I mean, Don Scaramucci loved you like a son.
Picked you out of everybody in the family.
He left me something, all right... but not money.
-This is the place. -Yo, what's the play, bro?
All right, I got high specificity intel.
We're gonna catch this asshole, literally, with his pants down.
[buzzing of power tool]
♪ Way up above with the ice and snow ♪
♪ Where the eyes of no one may see ♪
♪ With my dear little men And my wonderful shop ♪
♪ Mister Santa Claus, that’s me ♪
♪ I’m building my toys for... ♪
[Hailey] Let me out! [screams]
[screams]
♪ I go along with a merry old song ♪
[screams]
♪ For I'm living each day In a wonderful way ♪
♪ But when Christmas time comes round ♪
♪ Away I go over the ice and snow To finish my trip... ♪
[pants]
[Happy] No, no, no, no. Go, go, go! Don't worry, Hailey. I'll find him!
[screams]
What'd I tell you? Huh?
[laughs]
Holy shit.
[sobs]
What did I tell you, Mike? It's nothing, right?
You're not a fucking tough guy anymore, Sax!
[phone rings]
Who's this?
-Pal Swipes Scaramouch. -No, you ain't. That's me.
Oh, boy. And they told me you were the smart one.
All right, genius, if you can follow this,
right now you're talking to the man who was hired
to kill the Scaramucci Brothers.
Now full confession, I am one lazy bastard.
So the problem is, how do I get all you squirrely assholes together in one place?
Solution, I call in a hit on that handsome son of a bitch Nick Sax.
Oh, shit.
I gather you all together in one place, lined up...
Like a turkey shoot.
[groaning]
[pants]
That's funny. I contracted for three.
Wait a minute. You're the baby brother, right?
Look at you. All grown up.
-Hands shaking. Asshole flapping. -You...
Yeah, I killed your brothers. That's right. It's awkward.
Oh!
Well, that sucked.
[gun clicks]
-Say bye-bye. -Wait, wait, wait, wait! [gasps]
Whatever you're getting paid. I've got something that's worth more.
[exhales]
I'm listening.
It's... it's a password.
-I just stopped listening. -From the Old Don in Sicily.
Before he died, he gave me a password to an encrypted file.
It's a... It's a list of names. It's priceless.
Yeah, I don't do priceless. I'm more of a cash and carry kind of guy.
Besides, it sounds like I'd be tortured and killed for it
by any number of interested parties.
So, while you're at it, why not give me, ass cancer?
[sniffles] Please, please.
Look, you're in a sharing kind of mood, I get it.
So, just tell it to your brothers.
[squeals]
-[banging] -Oh!
[car alarm blares]
[Sax groans]
[Angel] You... you... you're shot.
Yeah. But it's the heart attack I just had that's really got my attention.
I got to join a spin class, eat more kale.
[groans]
What the...?
Perfect.
Hey! Hey, hey, mister, what about my money?
[pants]
Mama, please, I been as good as I can. Forgive me, Mama.
Kid, if I remind you of your mama,
you got bigger problems than a hole in your gut.
If you just hear my confession, I can move on, Mama.
Confession? Yeah, sure, knock yourself out.
Mama, the world, it's run by devils!
They... they look like people, but they're devils. [gasps]
Great Grandpa, he showed me things, things I wish I never saw. [sobs]
I got to talk to you, Mama,
so then I won't have it in me anymore and then I can be free.
[sobs]
All right, I already told you once, pal, I won't tell you again,
I'm not interested.
[exhales]
That was easy.
[grunts]
Okay. All right, Nick.
All right, you're fine. You're fine. You're fine.
[grunts]
[mutters]
[groans]
Ah!
[groans]
-Looks dead to me. -Less paperwork if he's dead.
-[groans] -Oh!
-Shit! Don't move, sir. Don't move. -Stay down.
[siren blares]
What the hell is this? Put your guns back in your pants.
Jesus.
He's breathing. What about this one?
Forty-five exit wound and a base jump from the third floor.
-Muchos muertos. -Disco Mikey Mootch.
Haven't seen him around in a while. Any witnesses?
Must have been one hell of a Christmas party.
Uh.
Big guy down there, he do this?
I don't know what the little guy said. I didn't hear anything.
What exactly is it you didn't hear?
The guy with the nice coat, he, uh... went all random.
Started talking about a password or something.
Password? You sure about that?
I guess you didn't happen to hear what it was.
Like I said, he just sort of whispered it and then... urgh.
Listen, I have been traumatized. Don't I get counseling or something?
He didn't mention this password to anyone else, right? Just... just the big guy?
Like I told you. Lady, I got every kind of thing that can
come out of a guy all over me, can I please get out of here?
Hey! [sighs]
[chattering over police radio]
Ready to roll.
Hey!
Make sure you keep him alive, or I promise you, it's your balls.
Hey, what about me, huh? I've been violated.
Take her home. No stops along the way.
What do you want?
Detective, ma'am, look, the guy's been shot.
He's had a heart attack, maybe two heart attacks.
-The chances he makes it to-- -He'll live.
He always does.
[sirens blare]
[Happy] So many lights! So many people! I'll never find him!
Yes, you will! Because you have to!
Where is he? Where is he?
Excuse me, can you help me? Of course not, he can't even see me!
Jeez, I thought I was having a bad day.
[groaning]
Okay, you two look busy.
Can you see me?
Yerks!
-Get over here! -Ah!
[Happy] Whoa! Must be an easier way to order a drink!
[car horns blare]
Hey, you're going the wrong way! Hey, watch it, pal!
[tires screech]
[engine revs]
Whoa! Looks like someone's got a lot of Christmas cards to deliver!
He's close, Hailey, I can feel it.
[Happy sniffs]
Actually, I can smell it.
He's got a vest!
-[bleeping] -Swirling, swirling.
-Clear! -Three, two, one!
It's like cooking a steak.
-Give him another. Three, two, one. -Three, two, one.
She said if we lose him, it's our balls. Do you think she meant that literally?
-Or, like... like a figure of speech -We're not gonna lose him.
Pure adrenaline. I got to admit, I've always wanted to do this.
[gibbering]
[gasps]
[screams]
What's up?
Morphine, 20 mgs, stat!
[screams]
[car horns blare]
[young paramedic whoops]
[groans]
[young paramedic laughs and yells]
Oh, that's warm.
Nitroglycerine!
Twenty-four mgs. Ah!
Mm.
Oh, yeah. That's it.
[Happy] Hey, Mister!
Come on, snap out of it!
[siren blares]
Wait a minute.
[grunts and laughs]
-You can see me! -What the hell?
Yeah, you weren't quite what I expected, either.
I guess we get what we get and we don't get upset, right?
Oh, boy. Well, here goes nothing.
I'm Happy!
♪ The happy horse, horse, horse So full of fun of course, of course ♪
♪ It's plain to see It's fun to be happy ♪
[laughs]
♪ The happy horse, horse, horse Full of love, of course, of course! ♪
♪ It's fun to be carefree So come with me! ♪
-♪ Happy! ♪ -♪ Happy! ♪
Here it comes!
Here comes the fun! Are you ready?
-I'm ready. -Here it comes!
♪ Clippity clop, flippity flop We got no time to mope and mop ♪
♪ Let's ride the magic rainbow Right to the tippy, tippy, tippy, tippy ♪
Stop! I'm hallucinating. Nitro.
Go away. Ah.
But... but... I got stuff to tell you! Mucho important stuff!
Shh!
-I don't talk to pink elephants. -What are you, color blind?
I ain't pink, pal, and elephants have trunks.
Do you see any luggage? [chuckles]
Kill this thing any way you can.
They can't see me. Only you can see me.
-Ah! -Ah!
Ah!
Look, asshole, I'm going to take a nap now.
-When I wake up, I want you to go. -[Happy] Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Don't go! Not yet! Hailey needs us!
[Blue] Well, usually, you're a great source of information,
but this time, I'm afraid you're mistaken.
My favorite nephew is currently on route from Italy.
Maybe he was yesterday. Right now he's in the county morgue.
And Nick Sax has got his fat, grubby fingers on my password.
Meredith, your father's on the TV again!
That evil bastard is so handsome.
You know, I can tell you're real broken up about
losing four nephews in one night, Blue.
Maybe I should give you a little time to process.
How very compassionate of you, Detective McCarthy.
And during the holiday season.
Gerry. Gerry, pay attention to Whiskers, please.
[barking]
-He's scratching. -It's the antlers, dear, he hates them.
[dog whines and barks]
[McCarthy] Sax should be at General.
I will be there when he wakes up and have a little chat.
[Blue] And I hope that conversation goes very, very well.
The thought that that slow troglodyte might actually die
before I get what I need out of him, well, I'm sure you understand.
It won't be you that I come to vent my spleen on.
How is your ma? Silly, fragile, old thing.
She been taking her medication?
My daughter doesn't care. She doesn't give a damn about... she...
Meredith?
-Meredith? -He'll talk.
There's something you're not telling me, Blue.
I mean, first, the Old Don dies on the other side of the world,
then, 24 hours, later there's four dead Scaramuccis in Brooklyn.
What's going on out there?
[Blue] Tell your ma I said she has to start taking her pills.
I can see where you get your stubborn streak.
[dog barks]
[chuckles]
[dog growls and barks]
Gerry! Little angel.
-Yes, Papa? -I don't want to tell you again.
If Whiskers won't stop scratching, I'm gonna have to put him on the fire.
And that will be four dogs we've gone through in the last year.
Socks, J. Edgar Woofer, Professor Buttons
and now... and now Whiskers.
-[growls and barks] -So please, little...
Smoothie!
[woman screams over phone]
Happy Holidays!
[whir of power tool and woman groans]
And a happy holidays to you, Mister Blue!
Thirty-nine inches. Forty-seven pounds. Blood type, O-negative.
This backpack she had on. What color was it?
-I told you, pink. -Pink, right, right.
Would you say it's like Pepto, or more of a pastel?
It was pink. Pink, pink. With Wishees all over it.
Wishees? Kids love that shit, don't they?
-I printed her myself, two years ago. -Really?
-And the father? -It's just me and my daughter.
Got everything we need to start the investigation on Ashley.
Hailey!
Hailey Hansen.
-I want to speak to Captain Rollins. -Rollins?
And if he's not here, Byrnes, tell him it's Amanda Hansen.
Listen. [sighs]
I know this is tough, but we're on it.
Go home. Get some sleep if you can.
And I have someone you can talk to in the morning.
[exhales]
[laughter and music on TV]
I died.
I really did it.
[laughter on TV]
I really did it.
And I'm in hell.
[Sonny] Not one wish, not two wishes, but three!
You should be so lucky.
-Oh, I bet that feels good, huh? -It ain't nothing.
Massive cardiac arrest, point-blank bullet impact, upper torso.
Had hangovers worse than this.
[wheezes and talks incoherently]
What?
I'm an invalid. Open up a window. [wheezes]
Window!
[coughs] It's against the law to smoke in a hospital. You know that, don't you?
Get it in gear. Open up a window, will you?
Not that window. No, no, no! No, no, no, no! Close! Close it!
Lucky for me she opened that window,
I was about to turn into a blueberry horse-sicle!
[sneezes] Excuse me.
-I'm pretty sure I told you to fuck off. -Oh, you did. A few times.
Not you.
-TV's off, Nick. -Huh? I know.
Meredith.
What are you here for?
[chuckles]
Nick Sax. Hard to believe this piece of shit in front of me used to be
the best detective in the whole department.
-Yeah, well, I was a real hero. -You were mine.
Wife of yours was smart to get out when she did.
Come on, you didn't come here to go there. Don't go there.
-Boy, she's a regular Good Time Pam. -Get off!
-There's something wrong with you. -[Sax] You have no idea.
Why couldn't you have just left me out on the street?
Why do you think you're here?
-Here. -Huh?
Yeah. General.
Some pension. Get shot just going about your business
and the best they can do is a mob hospital.
I think I still got some of your business on my shoe.
You know, I know what Disco Mikey told you.
You're in deep shit.
You're in deep Bandini, Nick. That means a bad word.
I have no idea what you're talking about.
Mikey gave you a password meant for Blue.
Dumb kid ran into you before he had a chance to deliver it.
I think you know what they'll do to get it out of you, unless you tell me first.
Password?
-Oh, I know! Open Sesame! -Seriously?
-Listen to me. -Go.
I think Blue hired you to kill his nephews.
Mikey just ended up in the wrong place at the wrong time.
I think there is a goddamn underworld civil war brewing
and you've landed your sorry ass right in the middle of it.
I think I can still get you out, but you have to tell me what you know.
What I know.
That people suck, I don't pay income tax
and I no longer feel dirty when I touch myself.
But, beyond that, it's just seems pretty clear
that whoever knows this alleged password
is as good as dead or worse.
That's about it.
Oh, Meredith, you're such a pain in the ass. You deserve better than that.
Thanks for coming in. I appreciate it and I will tell you this...
Get the hell out of here.
Comprendo?
-It's comprende. It's Spanish. -I know it's Spanish!
[announcement over P.A. system]
All right, then.
It is what it is.
It sure ain't what it ain't.
Well, about time she left. What a charmer.
Look, I don't want to speak out of school, Nick,
but I think she might have a thing for you.
[background chattering]
[Happy] Wait a minute, were you two...? [gags]
-Oh, I'm going to lose my lunch. -It's the oxycodone.
Pull it together, Sax. You're hallucinating. That's bad.
Some kind of reaction.
[Happy] Who you talking to, Nick?
You know, I used to know a guy who would talk himself
and he ended up in the funny farm! He's, like, cuckoo, you know?
[gibbers]
Bing! Bing! Bing! Cuckoo!
So, you're some kind of manifestation of my subconscious, right?
You lost me at "so".
Something about a submarine sandwich?
Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. Okay, breathe.
Five, four, three, two, one.
This is no time for hide and seek, Nick, even though I love it.
Besides, peeking is cheating.
-You're not real. -Of course not. I'm an imaginary friend.
My imagination is very limited.
It usually involves inflicting pain in ways that may not have occurred to most.
[laughs] You're funny, Nick, but I ain't your imaginary friend.
I don't even want to think about what that would look like.
-I'm Hailey's imaginary friend. -Right.
Hailey's a little girl, Nick, the sweetest, most adorable little girl
in the whole world, but... but she's in real bad trouble and you're the only one
-that can help me save her. -[grunts]
[elevator bell rings]
[chuckles] No exit this way, Nick.
[grunts] Jesus. That was a bad one.
Damn pills are going to kill me.
All right.
-We got company, Nick! -And he's back!
-Some real creepazoids. -Hey, if you want to be useful,
why don't you tell me how many I'm dealing with?
Okay, one, two, three, four, uh, five!
-Are you sure about that? -Uh-huh.
So, five, I've done five. I can do five.
[grunts]
Here they come! Here they come! Here they come!
[exhales]
Uh-oh.
Tick tock. Time to rock.
[grunts]
No, that's not going to do.
Hey! Hey! Hey! [grunts]
[roars]
[grunts]
-[Smoothie] That's better. -Woo.
[Sax] Some help you turned out to be.
No offense, buddy, but I don't see how we're going to save Hailey
if you keep fainting at the first sign of trouble!
Why are you whispering?
Okay. Drug-induced dementia is a luxury that you will no longer get to enjoy.
I am going to need your complete focus and attention.
Smoothie?
Clearly my reputation precedes me.
Well, I heard you like to get pee-peed on if that's what you mean.
-[sniggers] -Thanks for the cosign.
Hey, there's nothing wrong with it, no shame.
I hear a lot of people are into that sort of thing. Oh!
I got video!
I beg your pardon? Nothing?
-What? -Look, asshole, let's get this over with.
You want Disco Mikey's password.
-Oh, I'll get that, believe me. -Yeah, of course you will.
I'm a tough nut, but you'll crack it, all right.
Why don't we just cut out the middle man and just get down to it, huh?
I'll spill the beans. I got no illusions that it will buy me a quick death,
but I mean, what the hell? We all got places to go, people to meet.
I couldn't have put it better myself.
Yeah, so, the kid is sitting there lying in my arms... [exhales]
sour smell of homemade lasagna on his breath
as he presses his cold, clammy lips to my ear and...
he whispers it to me... right before he croaks.
I'll never forget the words he utters, he says...
"Tinkle, tinkle."
[laughs]
Ah! Ah! [chuckles]
Oh, I am going to get the words, believe me.
But I'm going to take my time.
I'm going to set an example with you.
-Do you want to know why? -Not really.
Because I am a professional.
I take pride in my work.
I approach my assignments with precision, discipline and respect for my employers.
You see, Sax, your reputation precedes you as well.
Hm?
You seem to look at each new job as an opportunity to fulfill
some half-acknowledged death wish.
You just don't get it, do you, Smoothie?
My life is an ever-swirling toilet that just won't flush.
I don't think I can die.
We'll see.
Music, please.
[music: "Blue Monday" by New Order]
Wow, was that as creepy as I felt? Creepy, right?
[Smoothie] I am going to remove your penis...
in thin slices, like salami... just for starters.
[whirs]
Uh, it's going to take you a long time. You know what I mean?
That's okay.
[whirs]
[growls and grunts]
I don't think I can watch! Come on, Nick! Do something!
Well, you know, after a while it just gets harder and harder
to find a reason to keep on going.
There's two kinds of people in this godforsaken world,
you worthless, little maggot! Which kind do you want to be?
A good apple, or a road apple? [growls]
-Oops! I pooped. -Oh, for Christ's sakes.
[grunting]
[screaming]
[groans]
[grunting]
Ya!
[grunts]
[groans]
[grunts]
[groans]
Yeah!
[Happy] Yeah, okay. Well, I think you made your point,
so can we go back saving Hailey?
-Now, is he going to be okay? -[man] No!
No, he is not going to be okay.
[gurgles]
[sighs]
Hey there, didn't see you.
Uh-huh. [grunts]
Oh, yeah, Papi. Huh?
Like that?
[splashing and Sax sighs]
[Sax sighs]
[breathes heavily]
I can explain.
Shoot to wound, man.
-Blue wants him alive. -Well, that's interesting.
We'll tango later there, angry eyes. Gentlemen.
[grunting and thumping]
[Happy] Let's go this way!
-Get him! -No, let's not go that way.
-[cops shout] -Back off or the horse gets it!
[cop] On the stairway! Follow me! Let's go!
Hold it!
[distant shouts of cops]
I'm actually really good at this. Nice jacket.
[music: "Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy" by Tchaikovsky]
I'm Doctor Who's This Here and I need some... having a... rough day.
What are you staring at?
Tough tonsillectomy. Kid'll pull through though.
[sighs]
Better?
-Actually, yeah. -Then, let's go save Hailey! Come on!
Let's go! Get out of the way!
[people shouting]
[grunts and groans]
[elevator bell rings]
[Happy] Yerks! More bad guys coming, Nick!
I need less bad guys and more good news out of you.
We're in a family-size jar of pickles, Nick!
I've no idea what that means.
What the heck, Nick! There's no elevator and you can't fly! Can you?
Third floor.
Oh, yeah. You got the loco eyes, buddy.
You know what? You can't help me save Hailey if you're dead-zo-roni!
Yeah, about this Hailey you keep yammering on about.
To hell with her and while you're at it, to hell with you.
-[sobs] -Hey, come on, don't do that.
[snivels]
How did you know there were five?
[screams]
Huh?
Back in my room, the creepazoids coming for me. You're a manifestation, but...
-How did you know there were five? -Yerk.
[gunshot and shouting]
[grunts and gunshots continue]
Whoa! What? Oh!
[sirens and gunshot]
Woo-hoo! Are we the best team or what?
[grunts and groans]
[pants]
Oh, hey, Merry.
-Nick. -Yerks.
Can I borrow your car?
You son of a bitch.
[car horns blare and Happy laughs]
[tires screech]
[horns blare]
Come on! Come on, where we going, Nick, huh? Where we going, huh?
We? We ain't going nowhere. You heard that nice lady back there.
I signed my own death warrant when I iced Disco Mikey.
Every scumbag in the city will be looking for me.
Uh, I mean, yeah, but...
Yeah, but, yeah, but nothing. I'm getting the hell out of Dodge.
Quit your tap dancing. You're ruining the dashboard.
-I didn't want to tell you, Nick. -So, then, don't.
I was afraid of scaring you away. After all, you left her once before.
[car horn and tires screech]
-Maybe you just don't want to be a daddy. -What are you yammering on about?
-Why do you think I picked you, Nick? -I don't know. Lucky, I guess.
You can say that again. Nick, Hailey is your daughter.
[coughs and music plays in background]
♪ Mr. Santa Claus, that’s me... ♪
[evil Santa] ♪ Toys and... toys and... ♪
♪ Little girls and boys ♪
[grunts and sobs softly]
[Hailey] Happy?
Happy?