1 00:00:07,960 --> 00:00:10,820 'Dear Diary. people have in their heads a vision 2 00:00:10,920 --> 00:00:13,100 'of what the first time would be like. 3 00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:17,200 'And mine nearly came true. 4 00:00:29,360 --> 00:00:33,180 'It nearly came true twice. 5 00:00:33,280 --> 00:00:35,420 'But I've said it before. 6 00:00:35,520 --> 00:00:39,300 'It's not like it is in the movies. 7 00:00:39,400 --> 00:00:43,400 'Movies aren't real. They're just stories.' 8 00:00:51,400 --> 00:00:53,300 Mia? 9 00:00:53,400 --> 00:00:55,400 Mia! 10 00:01:00,040 --> 00:01:02,100 Morning. Hiya. 11 00:01:02,200 --> 00:01:05,380 Liam, wake up, you lazy little shit. Jesus. 12 00:01:05,480 --> 00:01:09,480 Don't Jesus me. Listen, Remember to ring the sparky. OK. 13 00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:14,760 For your Nana. Whatever. Lazy bugger. 14 00:01:21,120 --> 00:01:25,120 Can I use your bathroom before I leave? Yeah, go for it. 15 00:01:27,760 --> 00:01:31,760 Did you sleep with your clothes on? Yes. Me too. 16 00:01:35,360 --> 00:01:39,360 It's pretty cool we're as fucked up as each other. 17 00:01:41,160 --> 00:01:43,220 Did you enjoy last night? 18 00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:46,140 I know it was your, er, first time. 19 00:01:46,240 --> 00:01:50,240 Totally loved it. Perfect. 20 00:02:42,320 --> 00:02:44,180 'Do you ever wish you could look back 21 00:02:44,280 --> 00:02:48,280 'and see the exact moment your life started to fall to pieces? 22 00:02:55,240 --> 00:02:57,780 'The beginning of the end. 23 00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:01,880 'Oh, you have to be kidding!' 24 00:03:03,440 --> 00:03:06,700 What do you think you're doing? 25 00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:10,500 I've got one place on Earth that I can go and chill out. 26 00:03:10,600 --> 00:03:14,100 One place that is not filled with your staff or Karim's stuff 27 00:03:14,200 --> 00:03:17,500 or the baby's stuff. And you've taken that away from me. 28 00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:21,740 I am not sharing my room with your baby. 29 00:03:21,840 --> 00:03:25,100 We are redecorating so I had to move your stuff. Yeah, I can see that. 30 00:03:25,200 --> 00:03:28,860 I found this. 31 00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:32,260 So? It's from your dad. 32 00:03:32,360 --> 00:03:36,360 Isn't it? 33 00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:44,300 You gave me his address, what did you expect? 34 00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:46,860 I just don't know what you could possibly want from him, 35 00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:50,960 what he could bring to your life. He's interested in me. 36 00:03:51,720 --> 00:03:54,660 He buys me amazing presents. 37 00:03:54,760 --> 00:03:58,760 But best of all, he doesn't talk about babies all the time. 38 00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:05,740 Do you know what? I wish that... 39 00:04:05,840 --> 00:04:09,840 Don't say it. Don't you dare say it. 40 00:04:11,040 --> 00:04:13,900 Why did you have to get pregnant? 41 00:04:14,000 --> 00:04:18,000 You've already messed up one kid's life. Why do it to another? 42 00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:23,460 Just tell me one thing. 43 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:27,560 Do you care at all about this baby? 44 00:04:29,360 --> 00:04:33,360 No. 45 00:04:36,720 --> 00:04:39,180 What? 46 00:04:39,280 --> 00:04:43,280 What, are you going to slap me again? 47 00:04:54,600 --> 00:04:56,660 'All I'd wanted for months 48 00:04:56,760 --> 00:05:00,220 'was to fit into college, to have a normal life. 49 00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:03,460 'I was no longer just a big girl in first year. 50 00:05:03,560 --> 00:05:07,460 'I was the girl who had the panic attack on stage. 51 00:05:07,560 --> 00:05:11,560 'I was the crazy girl.' 52 00:05:13,200 --> 00:05:16,740 So? I thought you was mental when you set the alarm off. 53 00:05:16,840 --> 00:05:20,420 Freaking out on stage takes it to a different level. 54 00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:24,180 Everyone thinks you're a psycho, you know? 55 00:05:24,280 --> 00:05:27,580 You are not the only one everyone's talking about, though, 56 00:05:27,680 --> 00:05:30,220 Where is that slag you call a best mate? 57 00:05:30,320 --> 00:05:32,700 You can say whatever you want about me, 58 00:05:32,800 --> 00:05:36,340 but do you ever say anything about Chloe. Ever. 59 00:05:36,440 --> 00:05:40,440 You better get off her. Little bitch. Are we clear? Rachel! 60 00:05:47,240 --> 00:05:51,240 Do you want to tell me what's going on? I give you a warning. 61 00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:57,000 I give you a final warning. There is no final final morning, Rae. 62 00:05:57,720 --> 00:06:00,380 Well, you don't have to kick me out. 63 00:06:00,480 --> 00:06:02,780 I can't do it. I'm leaving. 64 00:06:02,880 --> 00:06:04,420 I'm not going to let you do that. 65 00:06:04,520 --> 00:06:06,860 Why? You just said you were going to kick me out. 66 00:06:06,960 --> 00:06:10,100 Rae, you are one of the cleverest students in this entire college. 67 00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:13,620 Don't throw that all away because of a bunch of bullies and knobheads. 68 00:06:13,720 --> 00:06:15,100 We'll fix it. 69 00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:19,200 Haven't you heard? I'm crazy. 70 00:06:20,240 --> 00:06:22,020 And no-one can fix that. 71 00:06:22,120 --> 00:06:25,220 Thanks for all the chances you've given me. 72 00:06:25,320 --> 00:06:29,320 And I'm so sorry if I let you down. 73 00:06:37,720 --> 00:06:41,460 'That's the thing about Rae Earl, she will let you down. 74 00:06:41,560 --> 00:06:45,100 'Everything she comes into contact with will fall apart. 75 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:48,540 'Touched by the darkness of her disease. 76 00:06:48,640 --> 00:06:52,640 Her bright future. Her gang of friends. Her family. 77 00:06:56,000 --> 00:07:00,000 'Even her best friend. 78 00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:04,920 'Maybe I keep finding myself on my own because no-one wants me around. 79 00:07:07,280 --> 00:07:11,280 'Maybe it's because they know I'm mental.' 80 00:07:15,680 --> 00:07:17,340 All right, everyone? 81 00:07:17,440 --> 00:07:21,440 I just wanted to start by saying that Danny is about to go home. 82 00:07:25,680 --> 00:07:27,260 Thanks, everyone. 83 00:07:27,360 --> 00:07:31,360 I thought I'd be a bit more excited about today. 84 00:07:35,080 --> 00:07:39,080 I-I can't remember what it's like, as such, outside. 85 00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:45,360 I'm just a bit afraid of fitting in. 86 00:07:48,160 --> 00:07:51,820 Of people thinking that I'm weird. 87 00:07:51,920 --> 00:07:55,920 I can be myself in here and that's fine. 88 00:07:56,360 --> 00:08:00,360 Because there's people who like the weird bits of me. 89 00:08:01,400 --> 00:08:05,400 And there's people who can hold me together when... 90 00:08:05,840 --> 00:08:09,840 ..when everything else falls apart. 91 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:23,020 What's the matter with you? You're normally the first one out the door. 92 00:08:23,120 --> 00:08:27,120 I've decided to come back. into hospital. 93 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:33,800 Please let me come back. You can't just decide to come back to hospital. 94 00:08:34,200 --> 00:08:37,140 Danny is leaving. So there's a room free. 95 00:08:37,240 --> 00:08:40,860 That's not how it works, it's not a hotel, it's a hospital. But I'm sick. 96 00:08:40,960 --> 00:08:43,420 But not by the standards of this hospital, you're not. 97 00:08:43,520 --> 00:08:45,500 The people who come and stay here 98 00:08:45,600 --> 00:08:48,060 are either a danger to themselves or to others. 99 00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:49,700 You're neither of those things. 100 00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:51,260 You've stopped hurting yourself. 101 00:08:51,360 --> 00:08:55,360 You haven't hurt yourself for months. 102 00:08:55,680 --> 00:08:59,680 What's happened? No, I don't want to talk about it with you. 103 00:09:02,400 --> 00:09:06,400 Therapy, it doesn't work. 104 00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:10,340 I've been coming to you for six months and nothing's changed. 105 00:09:10,440 --> 00:09:13,220 In my professional opinion, I think you're wrong. 106 00:09:13,320 --> 00:09:16,660 If nothing had changed, you'd still be hurting yourself. 107 00:09:16,760 --> 00:09:20,760 People who are broken, they don't want you to be professional. 108 00:09:21,520 --> 00:09:25,520 They just want you to be real. 109 00:09:33,640 --> 00:09:36,660 'Dear Diary. Is this how it works? 110 00:09:36,760 --> 00:09:38,740 'Aren't you allowed back into hospital 111 00:09:38,840 --> 00:09:40,540 'unless you do something extreme? 112 00:09:40,640 --> 00:09:42,660 'Do you have to show you're broken on the inside 113 00:09:42,760 --> 00:09:45,640 'by breaking yourself on the outside?' 114 00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:04,600 'How's it going? I wanted to write you a letter to say hi. 115 00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:10,480 'And also to say sorry about leaving like I did. I miss you already. 116 00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:16,320 'You are world-class. I mean that. 117 00:10:17,320 --> 00:10:21,320 'Our group of friends was nothing until you sprayed Rae all over it. 118 00:10:21,640 --> 00:10:24,260 'Look after them all. You're the one they always look to. 119 00:10:24,360 --> 00:10:26,780 'You're the glue. 120 00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:30,880 'So no pressure. Laters. Finn. 121 00:10:32,280 --> 00:10:35,420 'Don't let Chop do his running elephant joke any more. 122 00:10:35,520 --> 00:10:39,520 'It's not as funny as he thinks it is.' 123 00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:51,900 'What was the point in ringing Finn? He was gone now. 124 00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:56,000 'What would I even say? What if he was right, though? 125 00:10:56,960 --> 00:10:59,300 'What if I was the glue? 126 00:10:59,400 --> 00:11:01,660 'What if, because I'm the one that broke at all, 127 00:11:01,760 --> 00:11:05,060 'I'm the one that can fix it? 128 00:11:05,160 --> 00:11:08,940 'The problem is that when everything is in a million little pieces, 129 00:11:09,040 --> 00:11:13,040 'it's hard to know what to try and fix first. 130 00:11:13,360 --> 00:11:17,360 'I guess I had to begin with the hardest thing of all.' 131 00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:19,500 Hi, Mr Gemell. 132 00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:22,940 Is it all right if I speak to Chloe? I need to apologise to her. 133 00:11:23,040 --> 00:11:26,780 Chloe's not here, she's still missing. She's not back? 134 00:11:26,880 --> 00:11:29,560 We don't know what to do. 135 00:11:32,960 --> 00:11:34,660 We've talked to the police. 136 00:11:34,760 --> 00:11:36,380 She's never been missing for this long, 137 00:11:36,480 --> 00:11:39,540 so they've finally taken seriously. 138 00:11:39,640 --> 00:11:43,260 They're going to want to talk to you and your friends at some point. 139 00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:46,820 We've talked to this Ian person. Yeah. 140 00:11:46,920 --> 00:11:50,920 But he said he doesn't know where she is. Nobody knows where she is. 141 00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:58,880 This is Chloe's diary. I don't know if it will help. 142 00:11:59,960 --> 00:12:03,860 I took it the other day. Why did you take it? 143 00:12:03,960 --> 00:12:06,700 I don't know. 144 00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:10,340 I wanted to find out why she'd been behaving the way she had. 145 00:12:10,440 --> 00:12:12,740 I wasn't thinking. 146 00:12:12,840 --> 00:12:16,820 I'm too wrapped up in my own stuff. 147 00:12:16,920 --> 00:12:20,920 I haven't been a very good friend to her. 148 00:12:23,320 --> 00:12:27,380 Neither have I. 149 00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:30,540 'There was no way that Ian didn't know where Chloe was. 150 00:12:30,640 --> 00:12:32,180 'No way! 151 00:12:32,280 --> 00:12:36,140 'There was also no way I was going to his house on my own. 152 00:12:36,240 --> 00:12:37,580 'I needed backup. 153 00:12:37,680 --> 00:12:40,660 'I needed to take one of the other fixes off my list first. 154 00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:42,900 'But the problem was, Archie was mad at Chop 155 00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:45,460 for not standing up for him in front of Simmy and Macca. 156 00:12:45,560 --> 00:12:48,260 Izzy was mad at Archie for telling Chop she'd kissed Peter. 157 00:12:48,360 --> 00:12:50,500 And Chop was mad at Izzy because she dumped him 158 00:12:50,600 --> 00:12:53,260 and now they all refused to be in the same room together. 159 00:12:53,360 --> 00:12:54,580 It's the perfect storm. 160 00:12:54,680 --> 00:12:58,340 Well, the perfect shit storm. 161 00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:00,260 Hi, muggins. 162 00:13:00,360 --> 00:13:02,740 Is it true? What? 163 00:13:02,840 --> 00:13:04,580 That you've left college? Yes. 164 00:13:04,680 --> 00:13:06,300 You can't, I won't let you. 165 00:13:06,400 --> 00:13:09,340 I've put up with too much whingeing from you to let it happen. 166 00:13:09,440 --> 00:13:13,260 Listen, that's not why I asked you here. Well, why did you? 167 00:13:13,360 --> 00:13:14,580 Rae! 168 00:13:14,680 --> 00:13:17,380 Look, just listen to me for a second, please. What's going on? 169 00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:19,820 What's he doing here? Er... What's he doing here? 170 00:13:19,920 --> 00:13:21,500 What's she doing here? 171 00:13:21,600 --> 00:13:22,620 Oh, bollocks! 172 00:13:22,720 --> 00:13:25,600 It would be easier gluing dog shit to the wind. 173 00:13:27,080 --> 00:13:30,700 Well, at least I got them in one place. Maybe it wasn't a lost cause. 174 00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:33,740 And if I can fix the gang, maybe I can fix everything else. 175 00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:37,220 This is your fault, Iz. What is? Clo going missing. 176 00:13:37,320 --> 00:13:40,020 How is it my fault? Don't take a genius to work it out, does it? 177 00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:42,220 You cheating on me, that made things awkward. 178 00:13:42,320 --> 00:13:44,940 If you hadn't have done that, me and you would still be together, 179 00:13:45,040 --> 00:13:46,380 the gang would still be together 180 00:13:46,480 --> 00:13:48,460 and we would have seen that Chloe was in the shit. 181 00:13:48,560 --> 00:13:49,940 But I didn't even want to kiss him! 182 00:13:50,040 --> 00:13:52,260 I didn't fancy him. It was a mistake. 183 00:13:52,360 --> 00:13:55,580 Well, why did you kiss him then? 184 00:13:55,680 --> 00:13:57,860 See. You still can't tell me. 185 00:13:57,960 --> 00:13:59,380 Yeah, but it isn't my fault. 186 00:13:59,480 --> 00:14:01,420 If Archie hadn't told you about me and Peter... 187 00:14:01,520 --> 00:14:02,740 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 188 00:14:02,840 --> 00:14:04,460 I didn't make you kiss the guy, did I? 189 00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:06,180 If it's anyone's fault it's Chop's. 190 00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:09,820 What? Because I tell you for free whose fault it isn't. Uncle Archie's. 191 00:14:09,920 --> 00:14:12,660 Archie, I told you to stop calling yourself that. How can it be mine? 192 00:14:12,760 --> 00:14:16,700 You're all making it seem like me, the one who's done... Guys, guys! 193 00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:20,780 Stop it. Please, just stop it. 194 00:14:20,880 --> 00:14:23,780 It's everyone's fault. 195 00:14:23,880 --> 00:14:27,380 Mainly Izzy's. I beg your pardon? 196 00:14:27,480 --> 00:14:30,460 You know what, Chop, I'll tell you why I kissed Peter. 197 00:14:30,560 --> 00:14:34,380 Because I was upset and disappointed with you for what you did to Archie. 198 00:14:34,480 --> 00:14:37,340 You let them boys kick him off the football team and call him 199 00:14:37,440 --> 00:14:40,620 horrible names and be mean to him. Yeah? What those boys done. 200 00:14:40,720 --> 00:14:44,780 I didn't do it. Yeah, you didn't DO anything. 201 00:14:44,880 --> 00:14:47,420 Bad shit happens when good people do nothing. 202 00:14:47,520 --> 00:14:50,060 This is some fresh bullshit. Let me out of the car. What? 203 00:14:50,160 --> 00:14:52,300 Let me out the car! 204 00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:54,400 Stop it! Guys, stop it! 205 00:14:57,960 --> 00:15:00,220 Maybe I couldn't fix the gang. 206 00:15:00,320 --> 00:15:02,460 Maybe they were broken forever. 207 00:15:02,560 --> 00:15:06,580 But so long as there was a shot at helping Chloe, I had to take it. 208 00:15:06,680 --> 00:15:08,680 Even if it was on my own. 209 00:15:21,720 --> 00:15:24,100 What do you want? Is Chloe here? 210 00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:26,200 No. 211 00:15:27,800 --> 00:15:31,020 Can I use your toilet? No, you can't. 212 00:15:31,120 --> 00:15:33,100 Don't be a dickhead, I know where it is. 213 00:15:33,200 --> 00:15:35,940 I was always surprised why Chloe was friends with you. 214 00:15:36,040 --> 00:15:39,900 She's beautiful, you're minging. OK... 215 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:41,980 I just want to see my best mate, please. 216 00:15:42,080 --> 00:15:43,380 We only let you hang out with us 217 00:15:43,480 --> 00:15:46,100 because Chloe told us you were funny and clever. 218 00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:48,620 That's what they always say about fat girls, isn't it? 219 00:15:48,720 --> 00:15:52,720 Got great personality. You haven't. 220 00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:55,620 Chloe? 221 00:15:55,720 --> 00:15:58,660 Have you ever stopped to think why Chloe hasn't been in touch? 222 00:15:58,760 --> 00:16:01,580 Because she doesn't want you around her. No-one wants you around... 223 00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:04,100 No-one wants you around... 224 00:16:04,200 --> 00:16:07,340 No-one wants you around. 225 00:16:07,440 --> 00:16:11,440 Go on, then. Fuck off. 226 00:16:18,200 --> 00:16:19,740 Ian was right. 227 00:16:19,840 --> 00:16:23,100 No one wants me around here because I don't fix things, 228 00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:27,100 I only break them. But I know a place where they do. 229 00:16:27,200 --> 00:16:31,200 Where people understand me. Like Tix understood me. 230 00:16:31,560 --> 00:16:34,660 And I know how to make them take me back. 231 00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:36,660 Just a little cut. 232 00:16:36,760 --> 00:16:38,500 Not like last time. 233 00:16:38,600 --> 00:16:42,600 Just a few little cuts. 234 00:16:50,240 --> 00:16:52,600 Mum? 235 00:17:02,600 --> 00:17:06,600 Mum? 236 00:17:11,480 --> 00:17:14,060 Mum? 237 00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:18,160 Mum! 238 00:17:25,720 --> 00:17:28,580 Mum? Oh, no! 239 00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:30,540 Rae, it's the baby. 240 00:17:30,640 --> 00:17:33,940 I need you to help me, darling. No. 241 00:17:34,040 --> 00:17:37,820 No, mum, I'm not strong enough, I can't. You can, darling. 242 00:17:37,920 --> 00:17:40,260 Everything is going to be fine. 243 00:17:40,360 --> 00:17:41,860 I promise. 244 00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:45,960 Now go and get me some towels. OK, OK. 245 00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:56,420 Good girl. Ring me an ambulance. 246 00:17:56,520 --> 00:17:58,900 OK, please. 247 00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:02,180 OK, OK! 248 00:18:02,280 --> 00:18:06,280 Doctor, I've got the notes you needed before... 249 00:18:10,360 --> 00:18:12,360 I'm sorry, you can't come any further. 250 00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:31,000 They haven't said anything. 251 00:18:43,600 --> 00:18:47,460 You go for sleep, yes? 252 00:18:47,560 --> 00:18:51,560 I ring. If they say, I ring. Cool. 253 00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:26,060 'Look after them all. 254 00:19:26,160 --> 00:19:30,160 'You're the one they always look to, you're the glue, so no pressure. 255 00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:35,400 'Laters, Finn.' 256 00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:50,420 There are times when I can't stop speaking, when a million words 257 00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:52,740 leave my mouth in a matter of seconds, 258 00:19:52,840 --> 00:19:54,840 a million words that mean nothing. 259 00:19:58,120 --> 00:20:01,100 Hello? 260 00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:05,200 Hello? 261 00:20:06,200 --> 00:20:08,700 But when I want to find some words that mean everything, 262 00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:11,540 I just can't speak. 263 00:20:11,640 --> 00:20:15,380 Like "I miss you," like "I love you," 264 00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:18,840 like, "My world is falling apart and I need you by my side." 265 00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:23,700 Hello? 266 00:20:23,800 --> 00:20:27,900 'Good morning, Rae. It's Kester. I just wanted to ring 267 00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:32,000 'to say I would love you to come in today for a session.' 268 00:20:32,800 --> 00:20:36,800 Yeah. 269 00:20:42,560 --> 00:20:45,780 You must be tired. 270 00:20:45,880 --> 00:20:49,880 Yeah. Well, I didn't want to go to sleep in case the hospital rang. 271 00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:56,460 I wanted to apologise for losing my temper with Liam the other day 272 00:20:56,560 --> 00:21:00,700 and for not setting a good example, boundaries-wise. 273 00:21:00,800 --> 00:21:04,620 I shouldn't have come round to your house. 274 00:21:04,720 --> 00:21:08,580 I was angry because I was embarrassed about it. 275 00:21:08,680 --> 00:21:12,380 Yeah, well, I shouldn't have lost my temper. 276 00:21:12,480 --> 00:21:16,480 I only did it because I care about you, about all of you. 277 00:21:18,600 --> 00:21:22,600 I guess from now on we'll just establish the boundaries as we go. 278 00:21:27,960 --> 00:21:30,100 I'm a horrible person, Kester. 279 00:21:30,200 --> 00:21:34,200 Why would you say that? 280 00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:39,080 My mum asked me if I cared about the new baby. 281 00:21:40,760 --> 00:21:44,020 And I said no. 282 00:21:44,120 --> 00:21:46,700 And the frightening thing is... 283 00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:50,340 is that I meant it. 284 00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:54,460 I don't care. 285 00:21:54,560 --> 00:21:57,100 Everywhere I go I seem to break things. 286 00:21:57,200 --> 00:22:01,200 And the more I try to fix them, the more I make it worse. 287 00:22:02,720 --> 00:22:06,460 It's not just my mum, it's my friends, it's Chloe. 288 00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:10,180 Because you can't fix other people until you've fixed yourself. 289 00:22:10,280 --> 00:22:14,280 But I can't be fixed. Because I'm crazy. 290 00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:19,300 You're not crazy. 291 00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:22,860 If you want to be a nicer person to other people, 292 00:22:22,960 --> 00:22:25,500 that's where it starts. 293 00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:27,580 I've tried being nice to myself. 294 00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:29,580 Have you? 295 00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:33,020 Because you've just been telling me what a horrible person you are. 296 00:22:33,120 --> 00:22:36,420 You're just using whatever's happening with Chloe 297 00:22:36,520 --> 00:22:40,300 or your mum as another reason to hate yourself. 298 00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:43,780 Every session, you say that I need to love myself, 299 00:22:43,880 --> 00:22:47,300 I need to start liking myself more. For months now. 300 00:22:47,400 --> 00:22:49,700 You're like a broken record. 301 00:22:49,800 --> 00:22:53,800 But you never tell me how to start or when to start or where to start. 302 00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:57,860 All right, we'll start now then. 303 00:22:57,960 --> 00:23:00,140 Not tonight, not tomorrow, not after this cup of tea, 304 00:23:00,240 --> 00:23:04,240 we'll start right now. 305 00:23:06,160 --> 00:23:08,220 Close your eyes. 306 00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:12,320 Close your eyes. 307 00:23:12,640 --> 00:23:16,180 Now I want you to tell me what you don't like about yourself 308 00:23:16,280 --> 00:23:18,540 but be honest with me. Don't be clever, 309 00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:22,640 don't be angry. Be honest. 310 00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:27,340 I'm fat. 311 00:23:27,440 --> 00:23:30,500 And I'm ugly. 312 00:23:30,600 --> 00:23:32,340 And I ruin things. 313 00:23:32,440 --> 00:23:36,440 Try and find some sense of how long you've felt that way. 314 00:23:37,760 --> 00:23:41,760 I don't know. Since I was about nine or ten. 315 00:23:42,240 --> 00:23:46,240 So this is an opinion you formed a long time ago about yourself. 316 00:23:47,400 --> 00:23:50,980 Open your eyes. 317 00:23:51,080 --> 00:23:55,080 I want you to imagine a ten-year-old version of yourself 318 00:23:55,800 --> 00:23:58,620 sitting right there on this coach. 319 00:23:58,720 --> 00:24:01,860 Now this is the little girl who first believed that she was fat 320 00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:04,420 and ugly and an embarrassment. 321 00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:08,520 I want you to imagine her sitting there right now. 322 00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:15,720 Now tell that little girl she's fat. I'm not going to do that. 323 00:24:16,240 --> 00:24:18,820 Tell that little girl she's ugly. I don't want to. 324 00:24:18,920 --> 00:24:22,700 Tell that little girl she's an embarrassment and worthless 325 00:24:22,800 --> 00:24:24,700 and useless. 326 00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:26,700 Because that's what you do every single day 327 00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:28,620 when you say that to yourself. 328 00:24:28,720 --> 00:24:31,300 When you convince yourself that you're an embarrassment 329 00:24:31,400 --> 00:24:34,500 and a burden. Well, don't you think she's ugly? 330 00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:37,060 No. No? Or fat? No. 331 00:24:37,160 --> 00:24:40,940 No? Or an embarrassment? Or horrible or worthless? 332 00:24:41,040 --> 00:24:45,040 Just stop it! No! 333 00:24:47,360 --> 00:24:51,360 Right? No. 334 00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:02,480 Want do you want to say to that little girl? 335 00:25:03,040 --> 00:25:06,740 If she said to you that's how she felt about herself, 336 00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:10,540 what would you tell her? 337 00:25:10,640 --> 00:25:14,780 That she's fine. 338 00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:17,260 That she's perfect. 339 00:25:17,360 --> 00:25:20,620 Then that's what you need to tell yourself. 340 00:25:20,720 --> 00:25:24,720 Every time you feel that panic, that anxiety... 341 00:25:26,800 --> 00:25:30,800 ..you need to soothe yourself like you would soothe the little girl. 342 00:25:32,640 --> 00:25:34,860 Yeah? 343 00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:36,700 Yeah. 344 00:25:36,800 --> 00:25:40,800 You need to tell yourself that everything's going to be OK. 345 00:25:41,640 --> 00:25:45,640 If you commit to that, 346 00:25:46,480 --> 00:25:50,480 then I promise you you'll be able to face anything. 347 00:25:52,880 --> 00:25:56,880 And it starts right now. 348 00:25:58,760 --> 00:26:02,760 Everything starts right now. 349 00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:08,500 Do you ever wish you could look back 350 00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:11,580 and see the exact moment your life started to come together? 351 00:26:11,680 --> 00:26:13,740 The end of the beginning, 352 00:26:13,840 --> 00:26:17,840 the moment you knew everything was about to change? 353 00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:24,900 Is there any news? She's out of danger. 354 00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:26,860 Has she said anything? 355 00:26:26,960 --> 00:26:29,420 No, I mean your sister. My sister? 356 00:26:29,520 --> 00:26:33,700 Yeah. She's in intensive care. 357 00:26:33,800 --> 00:26:36,020 Is she going to be OK? 358 00:26:36,120 --> 00:26:40,120 We just need to wait and see what happens in the next few hours. 359 00:26:40,680 --> 00:26:43,740 What about my mum? It's too early to say. 360 00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:47,840 We're doing everything we can for her. 361 00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:25,540 Thanks. 362 00:27:25,640 --> 00:27:28,920 That's all right. 363 00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:33,980 I'm a sister. 364 00:27:34,080 --> 00:27:37,740 I'm actually someone's big sister. 365 00:27:37,840 --> 00:27:41,840 Nice. I think you'll make a pretty good big sister. 366 00:27:42,680 --> 00:27:43,620 Yeah? 367 00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:44,900 Yeah. 368 00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:46,780 You don't think I'll be annoying? 369 00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:48,860 I didn't say that. 370 00:27:48,960 --> 00:27:52,960 Right. 371 00:27:56,600 --> 00:28:00,600 If you need a lift here after college, then I can take you. 372 00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:05,560 I've got a lot of free time on my hands. 373 00:28:07,320 --> 00:28:11,320 I've decided that being a scaffolder in Leeds 374 00:28:11,880 --> 00:28:15,880 wasn't exactly the dream I thought it'd be. 375 00:28:17,760 --> 00:28:20,260 Thanks, but... 376 00:28:20,360 --> 00:28:24,360 It's all right. I'm not going to college any more. 377 00:28:25,880 --> 00:28:29,140 Why would you leave? 378 00:28:29,240 --> 00:28:33,240 Everyone there knows that I'm crazy. You guys know me. You understand me. 379 00:28:36,320 --> 00:28:39,220 Not everyone's like that, Finn. 380 00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:43,060 Yet, but everyone's crazy. 381 00:28:43,160 --> 00:28:47,160 Everyone has to struggle and fight, they just haven't realised it yet. 382 00:28:49,000 --> 00:28:53,000 At least you have. 383 00:28:54,640 --> 00:28:58,640 Once upon a time, in a disabled toilet far, far away... 384 00:29:01,280 --> 00:29:05,260 ..you asked me why I liked you. Remember? 385 00:29:05,360 --> 00:29:08,620 Yeah, I remember. 386 00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:11,740 It's because you're strong. 387 00:29:11,840 --> 00:29:15,840 You just haven't realised it yet. 388 00:29:16,400 --> 00:29:20,400 Rachel, you can see your sister now, if you like. 389 00:29:26,320 --> 00:29:28,180 I'm your big sister. 390 00:29:28,280 --> 00:29:32,280 I'm going to look after you and love you and make sure you're all right. 391 00:29:37,520 --> 00:29:40,780 You're perfect. 392 00:29:40,880 --> 00:29:44,860 You are perfect. 393 00:29:44,960 --> 00:29:48,900 You can be strong. You can be strong. 394 00:29:49,000 --> 00:29:53,000 You CAN be strong. 395 00:29:53,600 --> 00:29:57,700 What do you want? 396 00:29:57,800 --> 00:29:59,620 I want you to tell me where Chloe is. 397 00:29:59,720 --> 00:30:01,300 Why should I? 398 00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:02,860 Because I want to know she's OK. 399 00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:05,540 Why don't you just go away and stop bothering people? 400 00:30:05,640 --> 00:30:07,100 Who's that? 401 00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:11,200 Visitor for you, mate. 402 00:30:12,720 --> 00:30:14,620 What the fuck are you doing here? 403 00:30:14,720 --> 00:30:17,780 She says she's looking for Chloe but I think she's come for you, lad. 404 00:30:17,880 --> 00:30:20,700 Yeah, Chloe told me why you won't sleep with me. 405 00:30:20,800 --> 00:30:24,800 She said that you've got a problem with taking your clothes off and that. It doesn't surprise me. 406 00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:28,740 If I looked like you, I'd probably feel exactly the same. 407 00:30:28,840 --> 00:30:32,220 Weird, Chloe can't keep her clothes on but you can't take them off. 408 00:30:32,320 --> 00:30:35,100 It'd have been a pity fuck as well, you know? 409 00:30:35,200 --> 00:30:38,060 Like any fuck she'll ever have. Right? 410 00:30:38,160 --> 00:30:39,340 I was pissed. 411 00:30:39,440 --> 00:30:43,440 'If I looked like you, I'd probably feel exactly the same.' 412 00:30:54,440 --> 00:30:58,440 You're perfect. You are perfect. 413 00:30:58,920 --> 00:31:01,380 Everything is going to be OK. 414 00:31:01,480 --> 00:31:04,420 Listen, Rae... 415 00:31:04,520 --> 00:31:07,580 It's time you do one. 416 00:31:07,680 --> 00:31:09,500 No. 417 00:31:09,600 --> 00:31:13,600 I'm looking for Chloe. Are you going to move or what? 418 00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:20,760 Chloe? 419 00:31:24,560 --> 00:31:28,560 Oh, Chloe. Thank God. 420 00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:35,460 What are you doing here, Rae? I've come to take you home. 421 00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:38,140 Everyone's really worried about you. I'm fine. 422 00:31:38,240 --> 00:31:42,240 No-one's hurt me. 423 00:31:43,280 --> 00:31:47,280 You shouldn't be going out with Ian, Clo. He's not a nice person. 424 00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:52,300 Going out? 425 00:31:52,400 --> 00:31:56,060 We're not going out. We're fucking, 426 00:31:56,160 --> 00:32:00,160 having fun, getting wasted. 427 00:32:00,880 --> 00:32:03,780 And we can do that and still sleep with whoever we want 428 00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:07,300 because we're adults. 429 00:32:07,400 --> 00:32:11,400 I fooled around with Ben the other night, so what? 430 00:32:12,360 --> 00:32:16,360 You wouldn't get it because you're not a part of it. 431 00:32:18,200 --> 00:32:22,200 And I know what you're thinking. 432 00:32:22,800 --> 00:32:25,820 You think they're taking advantage of me. 433 00:32:25,920 --> 00:32:28,140 But they aren't. 434 00:32:28,240 --> 00:32:31,180 They like me. 435 00:32:31,280 --> 00:32:33,860 You know, and I'm the one taking advantage. 436 00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:36,660 I'm the one with the power, me. 437 00:32:36,760 --> 00:32:40,760 So what is it that you think they like about you, then, Clo? 438 00:32:41,680 --> 00:32:44,660 I didn't say like, I said want. You said like. 439 00:32:44,760 --> 00:32:48,760 Well, what's the difference? 440 00:32:49,760 --> 00:32:53,760 Do you have any idea how good it feels when someone, 441 00:32:54,440 --> 00:32:58,100 someone literally can't keep their hands off you 442 00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:02,220 and they grab you like they're crazy? 443 00:33:02,320 --> 00:33:04,580 You think I'm a bad person, I can see that. 444 00:33:04,680 --> 00:33:05,940 No, I don't think that. 445 00:33:06,040 --> 00:33:08,580 No, you think I'm a stupid slag! 446 00:33:08,680 --> 00:33:10,740 Well, so what?! 447 00:33:10,840 --> 00:33:14,460 It's my body and I can do what I want with it. 448 00:33:14,560 --> 00:33:18,060 Do you understand that? I do understand. 449 00:33:18,160 --> 00:33:22,160 Clo, I do, I do understand. I do. 450 00:33:25,760 --> 00:33:29,760 Chloe, please let me get you out of here. 451 00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:34,640 I'm scared. I know. But it'll be all right. 452 00:33:37,800 --> 00:33:41,360 OK, everything will be all right. I promise. 453 00:33:51,160 --> 00:33:54,360 Here you go. It's your favourite mug. 454 00:33:57,600 --> 00:34:00,180 Is your mum going to be all right? 455 00:34:00,280 --> 00:34:04,280 I don't know. 456 00:34:04,800 --> 00:34:08,800 Can I get you anything else? No. 457 00:34:09,600 --> 00:34:13,600 Rae... I'm scared about telling my parents everything. 458 00:34:16,720 --> 00:34:20,900 I'm scared about Ian coming to find me. Hey, don't be. 459 00:34:21,000 --> 00:34:24,180 OK, we'll sort it out. 460 00:34:24,280 --> 00:34:28,280 We'll sort everything out. 461 00:34:31,080 --> 00:34:34,700 Chloe... 462 00:34:34,800 --> 00:34:37,740 I found your diary in your room. 463 00:34:37,840 --> 00:34:40,540 I read it. 464 00:34:40,640 --> 00:34:44,780 I let you down. 465 00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:48,880 I'm so sorry that I let you down. 466 00:34:50,160 --> 00:34:52,060 So, you know about Finn? 467 00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:54,740 Yeah. 468 00:34:54,840 --> 00:34:57,540 I didn't fall in love with him on purpose. 469 00:34:57,640 --> 00:34:59,300 I know... 470 00:34:59,400 --> 00:35:03,420 I'm not meant for a Finn. 471 00:35:03,520 --> 00:35:07,520 I'm meant for a Ian. Oh, Chloe, of course you're not. 472 00:35:08,200 --> 00:35:12,200 You need to start being kinder to yourself. 473 00:35:12,520 --> 00:35:16,520 You need to... you need to soothe yourself. 474 00:35:18,880 --> 00:35:20,820 Say, "OK, Rae." 475 00:35:20,920 --> 00:35:22,260 OK, Rae. 476 00:35:22,360 --> 00:35:23,580 "OK, Rae!" 477 00:35:23,680 --> 00:35:27,580 OK, Rae! 478 00:35:27,680 --> 00:35:31,300 God! 479 00:35:31,400 --> 00:35:34,420 Oh, what's everyone in college saying? 480 00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:37,660 They are saying that you're a slut. 481 00:35:37,760 --> 00:35:41,760 Nice. And I'm mental... oh. 482 00:35:44,240 --> 00:35:48,240 Do you know, I don't even care what they think of me. 483 00:35:49,120 --> 00:35:52,660 I just care what you think of me. 484 00:35:52,760 --> 00:35:56,760 Well, I think... that you're my best mate... 485 00:36:00,480 --> 00:36:03,220 ..and I think you're amazing! 486 00:36:03,320 --> 00:36:05,320 Stop it. 487 00:36:15,880 --> 00:36:19,880 Oh, baby! Oh, baby, you know it's OK, it's OK. 488 00:36:21,240 --> 00:36:22,980 Are you all right? 489 00:36:23,080 --> 00:36:26,380 Mmmm, yeah, I'm stable... apparently. 490 00:36:26,480 --> 00:36:30,480 First time in my life anyone's ever said that about me. 491 00:36:31,440 --> 00:36:34,500 Hey, I'm sorry we fell out. 492 00:36:34,600 --> 00:36:37,460 When I was lying there on the bathroom floor, I remember 493 00:36:37,560 --> 00:36:41,140 thinking how bad it would be if... 494 00:36:41,240 --> 00:36:45,240 Well, you know, if... the last thing we did was have an argument 495 00:36:45,600 --> 00:36:47,460 and that was how you remembered us. 496 00:36:47,560 --> 00:36:49,620 No, don't be stupid. 497 00:36:49,720 --> 00:36:53,720 I was just angry about you seeing your dad. 498 00:36:54,280 --> 00:36:58,280 I was selfish, it's just because I don't think he's a nice person. 499 00:36:59,120 --> 00:37:03,120 You should have the opportunity to form your own opinions. 500 00:37:03,440 --> 00:37:07,440 Mum, how did you know it was him 501 00:37:07,840 --> 00:37:09,740 that gave me that record player? 502 00:37:09,840 --> 00:37:12,900 Oh, I don't know. 503 00:37:13,000 --> 00:37:16,340 Mum? 504 00:37:16,440 --> 00:37:19,340 It's the same record player he gave me, 505 00:37:19,440 --> 00:37:22,860 for our anniversary, 20 years ago. 506 00:37:22,960 --> 00:37:26,220 I didn't want to tell you. 507 00:37:26,320 --> 00:37:28,580 Why would he do that? 508 00:37:28,680 --> 00:37:30,980 I honestly don't know. 509 00:37:31,080 --> 00:37:35,080 Maybe he just forgot. 510 00:37:35,400 --> 00:37:38,740 Anyway, I've got a favour to ask you. 511 00:37:38,840 --> 00:37:41,500 I've not seen the baby yet. 512 00:37:41,600 --> 00:37:43,900 Will you describe her to me. 513 00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:48,000 Mum, she's so cute... her fingers and toes are like little Rice Krispies. 514 00:37:48,840 --> 00:37:51,140 She's the most beautiful baby in the whole world 515 00:37:51,240 --> 00:37:55,240 and she yawns like a little lion cub... 516 00:38:03,080 --> 00:38:06,100 There's a part in all of us that's scared and not sure. 517 00:38:06,200 --> 00:38:09,100 And when you get the ability to see that in yourself, 518 00:38:09,200 --> 00:38:13,260 you start to see that everyone is fighting, every day and just 519 00:38:13,360 --> 00:38:17,260 like Finn said, so, instead of saying, 520 00:38:17,360 --> 00:38:19,740 "You're fat and you're ugly..." 521 00:38:19,840 --> 00:38:23,140 I'm going to say, "You are the person who helped your mum out, 522 00:38:23,240 --> 00:38:27,240 "Who saved your best mate who lives with an illness but keeps on going." 523 00:38:28,880 --> 00:38:32,420 Me... I did all that all that. 524 00:38:32,520 --> 00:38:34,140 That's not to say me 525 00:38:34,240 --> 00:38:37,820 and Chloe weren't scared of going back to college, we were terrified. 526 00:38:37,920 --> 00:38:41,920 But we had to do it for each other. 527 00:38:43,160 --> 00:38:44,700 Jesus! 528 00:38:44,800 --> 00:38:48,800 Because there's nothing we couldn't face when we're together. 529 00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:51,940 I thought you were off getting your brains shagged out by every 530 00:38:52,040 --> 00:38:54,660 man in Stamford. 531 00:38:54,760 --> 00:38:58,760 Don't Rae. 532 00:38:59,880 --> 00:39:03,880 Oh... 533 00:39:06,360 --> 00:39:10,320 See you later Vicky. 534 00:39:15,880 --> 00:39:19,540 Listen, there something I've got to go an do, are you all right? 535 00:39:19,640 --> 00:39:23,640 Yes, I'll be fine. Are you going? Yes... go! 536 00:39:28,240 --> 00:39:31,380 So, you've come out of hiding. 537 00:39:31,480 --> 00:39:35,180 So, how about tonight, then? 538 00:39:35,280 --> 00:39:39,280 Listen, Liam, I think we should just be friends. 539 00:39:41,880 --> 00:39:44,540 I just don't think that we're good for each other. 540 00:39:44,640 --> 00:39:46,340 Why? 541 00:39:46,440 --> 00:39:48,500 I don't want to be fucked up any more. 542 00:39:48,600 --> 00:39:51,980 I don't think that there's anything wrong with being fucked up. 543 00:39:52,080 --> 00:39:56,080 Yeah, you say that... so, you don't think that people can change? 544 00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:05,400 But I know that they can. 545 00:40:06,640 --> 00:40:10,460 Liam could stay the same and that's OK but I was changing now 546 00:40:10,560 --> 00:40:13,140 and that meant not turning up on my dad's doorstep. 547 00:40:13,240 --> 00:40:15,740 It meant, finally, writing him a letter that said, 548 00:40:15,840 --> 00:40:18,460 "It was nice to meet you and see you around." 549 00:40:18,560 --> 00:40:22,560 Because the truth was that I already had a dad. 550 00:40:23,480 --> 00:40:26,580 Hang on, Mum, why are we going into your room? 551 00:40:26,680 --> 00:40:30,580 Well, that's the thing, it's not our any more. 552 00:40:30,680 --> 00:40:32,680 It's your room. 553 00:40:33,760 --> 00:40:35,420 What? 554 00:40:35,520 --> 00:40:39,520 No! Oh, my God! 555 00:40:40,480 --> 00:40:41,700 Do you like it? 556 00:40:41,800 --> 00:40:44,380 Yeah! Wait, where are you going to sleep? 557 00:40:44,480 --> 00:40:45,820 Oh, we'll go in with the baby and 558 00:40:45,920 --> 00:40:47,660 when mini Boushtat needs her own space, 559 00:40:47,760 --> 00:40:50,660 we'll sort something out. Anyway, you'll be at uni then, won't you? 560 00:40:50,760 --> 00:40:52,060 Eh, eh, won't you? 561 00:40:52,160 --> 00:40:54,980 Yeah! Yeah! 562 00:40:55,080 --> 00:40:58,940 Hang on... how did you two afford all this? 563 00:40:59,040 --> 00:41:01,780 Well, why do you think Karim took a second job? 564 00:41:01,880 --> 00:41:04,740 He's been working nights to make this whole house look nice, 565 00:41:04,840 --> 00:41:06,940 haven't you Mr Lollypop. 566 00:41:07,040 --> 00:41:08,900 Stop! Cross. 567 00:41:09,000 --> 00:41:10,460 Really? 568 00:41:10,560 --> 00:41:12,460 I like, it's not bad. 569 00:41:12,560 --> 00:41:14,500 No. 570 00:41:14,600 --> 00:41:18,780 Mum, thank you. Karim, thank you. 571 00:41:18,880 --> 00:41:20,900 Oh, baby. I don't know what to say. 572 00:41:21,000 --> 00:41:23,220 You didn't have to do all this for me. 573 00:41:23,320 --> 00:41:27,320 It's my job number three, job number three, 574 00:41:27,880 --> 00:41:31,140 taking care of my three ladies. 575 00:41:31,240 --> 00:41:32,540 Yes? 576 00:41:32,640 --> 00:41:36,140 I say wrong? Love, you said perfect! 577 00:41:36,240 --> 00:41:39,540 Anyway, little Boushtat gets to come home next week, 578 00:41:39,640 --> 00:41:41,700 so, say goodbye to sleep. 579 00:41:41,800 --> 00:41:43,500 You all right with that? 580 00:41:43,600 --> 00:41:45,900 Mum, you joking? 581 00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:48,100 I can't wait! 582 00:41:48,200 --> 00:41:51,340 Everything was slowly coming back together. 583 00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:55,440 There was just one thing left to be fixed. 584 00:41:56,160 --> 00:41:57,860 So, what time's Finn getting here? 585 00:41:57,960 --> 00:42:01,780 How should I know? 586 00:42:01,880 --> 00:42:05,220 Archie, I'm so sorry that I was mad at you. 587 00:42:05,320 --> 00:42:08,380 Look, I know that you were angry at Chop and that's why you told him. 588 00:42:08,480 --> 00:42:12,460 I'm sorry too. 589 00:42:12,560 --> 00:42:15,420 Awww! 590 00:42:15,520 --> 00:42:17,140 Oh, for... 591 00:42:17,240 --> 00:42:18,980 You all right, dudes? 592 00:42:19,080 --> 00:42:22,820 How's it hanging... Archie, still a bummer? 593 00:42:22,920 --> 00:42:24,780 Just go away! 594 00:42:24,880 --> 00:42:27,660 What, that was a legitimate question. 595 00:42:27,760 --> 00:42:29,340 Are you still a bummer? 596 00:42:29,440 --> 00:42:33,500 Stop! Everyone, stop what they're doing! 597 00:42:33,600 --> 00:42:37,600 Why don't you tell the full pub what you've just asked Archie? 598 00:42:39,280 --> 00:42:40,620 What you on about, Chop, man? 599 00:42:40,720 --> 00:42:43,980 I'm being serious, pal! Tell the whole pub! Piss off! 600 00:42:44,080 --> 00:42:48,140 This motherfucker here is a top fella and I sat there 601 00:42:48,240 --> 00:42:52,240 and watched you two mugs take the piss out of him. 602 00:42:53,160 --> 00:42:57,160 I'm sorry, lad. Jesus, are you two going out or something? 603 00:43:00,440 --> 00:43:03,180 If I see you in this pub again, 604 00:43:03,280 --> 00:43:05,940 I'll fucking debrief you! 605 00:43:06,040 --> 00:43:10,220 Off you pop, lads. 606 00:43:10,320 --> 00:43:12,680 Bye! Bye! 607 00:43:14,880 --> 00:43:18,880 Chop, you didn't have to... 608 00:43:20,920 --> 00:43:22,460 I love you, lad. 609 00:43:22,560 --> 00:43:24,560 I mean that. 610 00:43:35,960 --> 00:43:37,820 There he is. 611 00:43:37,920 --> 00:43:39,660 Hiya, Rae, all right? 612 00:43:39,760 --> 00:43:41,140 Are you all right, Danny? 613 00:43:41,240 --> 00:43:43,140 Yeah, thanks for inviting me. 614 00:43:43,240 --> 00:43:44,580 I'm so excited and nervous. 615 00:43:44,680 --> 00:43:48,020 I only wore one hat cos I don't want everybody to think 616 00:43:48,120 --> 00:43:52,060 I'm too mad or anything. 617 00:43:52,160 --> 00:43:55,580 And that was that, everything was back together again... well, 618 00:43:55,680 --> 00:43:57,100 almost everything. 619 00:43:57,200 --> 00:43:59,660 Taking a bite out of a piece of bread was one thing 620 00:43:59,760 --> 00:44:01,900 but getting naked was another. 621 00:44:02,000 --> 00:44:03,740 And if I couldn't do it, 622 00:44:03,840 --> 00:44:07,620 then it wasn't fair to Finn to get involved with him again. 623 00:44:07,720 --> 00:44:10,020 Or to be around him. 624 00:44:10,120 --> 00:44:11,940 How's it going? 625 00:44:12,040 --> 00:44:14,060 Ups and downs, you know. 626 00:44:14,160 --> 00:44:18,160 I just wondered if we could talk. 627 00:44:18,600 --> 00:44:22,600 You know, about you and me. No, no, I don't think that's a good idea. 628 00:44:25,680 --> 00:44:27,920 I don't think talking's a good idea. 629 00:44:34,000 --> 00:44:38,000 Dear Diary, that's the thing with diaries, they're like movies, 630 00:44:38,680 --> 00:44:42,140 they're just stories, filled with the things I saw 631 00:44:42,240 --> 00:44:43,780 and the things I felt. 632 00:44:43,880 --> 00:44:45,580 But when I look around, 633 00:44:45,680 --> 00:44:49,680 I see that everyone's the protagonist of their own story. 634 00:44:50,000 --> 00:44:54,000 And the thing about stories is that not all of them have a happy ending. 635 00:44:57,200 --> 00:45:01,200 But some do. 636 00:45:04,760 --> 00:45:08,760 This is much better than talking. 637 00:45:09,080 --> 00:45:12,940 Yeah, well, when I say, "To be continued," 638 00:45:13,040 --> 00:45:17,040 I mean, "To be continued!"